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#if i'm remembering correctly of course. which i'm not sure. hence why i need to refresh my memory
marunalu · 2 years
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Well, that's true he could've left the family earlier. But I find it hard to believe that he could've been taken by surprise by All Might, since he knew he was already being targeted by him since he watched him slowly dismantle his empire. He also knew he was most likely he was going to die from the encounter hence why he duplicated his quirk for Tomura and hid his Gigantomachia, to prepare for the possibility that he may not return. I could be wrong however. (also where does it say he tried to flee?) What age do you think he left them though? I'm going to be honest and say I don't think he was too involved with his family, which is why Izuku doesn't think much about him. Even when he nearly died. Also Izuku made no mention of his fathers reaction after being diagnosed quirkless, one of the biggest events of his life, so it shows distance between the two, though we can't rule out a memory quirk being at play. I'm still on the fence about whether AFO truly cares about his family.
Yeah Im pretty certain there is a memory quirk at play here or its garakis doing, because we know he also manipulated the memorys of little tenko. Or if its not a quirk and izuku remembers his father, its also possible that izuku just refuses to think about him out of hurt, because he feels abdoned by him or maybe fears that his father left out of shame over a quirkless son. Honestly Im not sure what to believe how old izuku was at that point. Every age fits, but I think I like the theory that afo only left overseas after his fight with all might best. Because that would mean izuku was old enough to remember and have a bond with him.
I mean, lets say we get the reveal soon. WHY should izuku care if he and his father have no bond with each other? If there is no love involved? What would be the point? If izuku realizes that his father has zero affection for him or his mother, where is the drama? Why should it affect izuku? Why should he struggle? If thats the case, izuku has no reason to hesitate and just finish afo off, but it would make dfo pretty pointless. But izuku realizing that his father actually loves him and his mom? That there is at least a little bit good in him? Not a complete monster? Izuku would hesitate. He would be in conflict and devasted, not knowing what to do. He needs to stop afo, he is his enemy, he is hurting people, but.... its still DAD! The tention it could course between him and all might, his friends not knowing how to react or what to do, a likely fight with bakugou if afo should be killed or not. Like it has so much more potential if afo actually loves his family as if he doesnt. Izuku would have zero reason to hold back and then his father also could have been ended as a normal dude and nothing in the story would have changed.
I dont have the manga with me and I dont remember the exact chapter, but if I remember correctly it was mentioned at afo tried to flee in his fight with all might, when all might told izuku the first time about afo. It was also mentioned that him trying to flee from all might instead of fighting was a strange reaction. Maybe someone can write in the comment section which chapter it was mentioned.
In the end everything is still just speculation. To me its clear hori intends to leave little hints for the readers about afos affection for his family. Their are suble enough for people not to think to much about or ignore it, but the hints are there. Hisashi if afo or not, still provides for his family and still sends them his money. If he is afo he wouldnt send HIS money to a woman and child he doesnt care about, because he needs this money to finance his nomou and other villain projects.
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xofantasycloud · 2 years
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11-23 please :)
Also if you're willing to answer, what's your job like? But no worries if that's too much.
11, Ever drank alcohol?
Yes I have😉 Although what I haven't done is try a negroni sbagliato with prosecco, has anyone tried it?😂 Like I feel like I should try it since there's such a hype surrounding it now, but idk😂 12, Every smoked anything?
Nope! Seen too many patients suffer because of it, plus I can't stand the smell of the smoke🥴 13, Do you prefer to eat-in or take-out?
Oh, hard one. I'll say eat-in, I do love to cook, the only problem is that I hate doing the dishes😂 14, If you could time travel what decade would you go to first?
I think the 1920's!😊 15, An actor everyone loves that you don't like for whatever reason
Can't think of any really actors in the moment, but I'll twist it around and say that I don't really like Captain America in the Marvel movies lol, him a lot of people seem to like a lot😂 16, Something not in your regional dialect that is in your vocabulary
Well there is a few things I say in Swedish that we don't really say in Stockholm where I live due to my best friend being from the north, but I don't think y'all will understand them if I list them, so I'll just go ahead and say; yes😂 17, Color of your eyes?
Blue! 18, Do you need glasses?
Yep, which is why I have glasses🤓 19, Speak any other languages?
I speak Swedish and English and a tiny bit French, I can understand Norwegian and if I focus hard enough I can sort of understand Danish (iykyk)😂 20, Have any tattoos?
Yep, I've got two! 21, Want any tattoos?
Always! I'm thinking of at least two or three that I want to get! 22, Have any piercings?
My ears are pierced, but I haven't used them in years🙃 23, Want any piercings?
When I was younger I wanted my nose pierced, but I don't currently feel the need for more piercings🙂
And sure, I can absolutely talk a bit about my job! Sorry in advance for the novel😝
So right now I'm studying to become a nurse and when I'm not studying or at one of my internships I work part time as a midwife's assistant! My tasks vary, but I usually support the labouring women, I help them with their contractions (putting pressure on knees/hips/back, reminding them to relax and to breathe, holding their hand, talking them through it) and help them use the laughing gas correctly, then I assist the doctors with things such as the epidurals, ultrasounds and other procedures, I help the women (and their partner's) with their babies once they're out and I of course assist the midwives (hence the name lol) with whatever they may need during this whole thing lol.
We're often times an extension of them, because sometimes they need to stay where they are (close to the woman, in another room or with the baby) so then I'm running around gathering stuff that they need! But I help them with stuff like the CTG, with examinations, with helping the women move around, with keeping track of times (like when they've given the women medications, when the women have changed positions, when they've gone to the bathroom), and I of course have to be there during the pushing stage, when the baby comes and after the baby's come. So during the pushing stage it's the midwife that runs the show, but sometimes it takes multiple people saying the same stuff for the women to actually hear us and do as we say. Sometimes I'm tasked with holding onto a leg or support a hip, and then when the baby comes I'm the one who has to remember when the head comes, when the time of birth is, the amount of blood the women's loosing and what time the midwife gives the different medications. Then afterwards I assist the midwife with the suturing if there's been any tearing, and sometimes the doctor if the tearing's bad!
After the baby's out and we've taken their measurements, I usually tend to the women, I take their blood pressure, help them to the bathroom, maybe help them clean up a bit if they wishes. Then I sometimes show them good positions to put the baby in to breast feed and how to best hold them if the midwife haven't already, and then they're often times off to stay at another floor!
Sorry if this felt a bit jumbled, but I just jotted down some of my tasks, I didn't really mention the cleaning of rooms or getting the patients food, but that's ofc something I also do lol. Hope this is sorta what you were hoping for!😊
PS, did not include my participation when complications arise, but that may include taking blood samples, checking temperatures, running to get blood, tending to the women if the baby needs urgent care, cutting the cord, stuff like that🙂
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halloweenrazorcandii · 7 months
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I mean if you know me by now you should also know that I'm not in the best headspace either, therefore I've been getting over it whilst still being upset about it if this paragraph makes sense
i knew it was going to happen eventually I just never wanted to say anything,, I've known since the Eli era baby (a little less but I've still had suspicions)
what upset me was the "I wish I never met you guys" but honestly at the same time i was just "sure whatever you say" in an I honestly don't have time to entertain whatever this is so I don't care right now way.. and I didn't really care after for a bit
the couple of times me and Kevin talked after I didn't bother asking about you because, well if you wish you never met me then why would I //neu but by that point I was kind of over it and way overdue for a therapy appointment so
i talked to myself a lot about it after and I know I'm self aware, so yeah I guess I still cared about it even after.. it just baffled me how you said that knowing wasn't in a good headspace and I had to think back like. did I ever say that to you at one point when you spiralled (nono, genuinely I'm still thinking about it, because what prompted that)
I'm STILL not in a good headspace which is why this is lengthy and it's a thought-spill because I don't have the energy to sugar anything
all of this isn't in //neg btw,, like even after then I didn't have any //neg feelings towards you but more of my usual "it's whatever" things
I do not mind talking to you after this or whatever, and I apologize in advance if I seem a little more callous than I normally would
but if you still wish you hadn't met me we don't have to talk we can just keep doing whatever we were doing before //gen
most of this is rushed because I'm being pressured to do chores jfc
im dizzy and awaiting a trip to the hospital in questioned time and i didnt know if i should respond to this yet because it wouldnt seem serious but i want you to know that i am im just not in a physical or mental state to sound as genuine as posisble though i am geuine so i apologize for spelling mistakes and or questionable sentences that dont make sense whatever i say i dont mean to self cneter or try to justify i have half a mind for what im saying rn /srs/gen i dont know where to start i know youn arent in the best head place or place at all and i dnt know or remember what this happened for but it did happen gradualy so i guess itwas building up i physically nor mentally more than 85% of the time cannot control what ido when i outburst especially with influence i have a disorder it will not be helped and i cannot say that i will not outburst because i literally yk cannot help it because i am a different person when i outburst hence cause - bpd n bipolar / insensity - other things and im being so serious when i say this and i am so sorry for saying that or saying that i wish i never met you guys thats what i was feeling so i said it and i shouldnt have and i am sorry and words cannot describe how confused i am on how to apologize correctly but i did not mean it for the most part i will be honest sometimes i have sour feelings when i am ghosted or ignored - this attatchments built up over the course of many years and if its being taken away then i am irrational and that is mostly explanation for why im so frequently upset - more than 2 weeks later it is still object of outbursts this explanation is not meant to feel guilt it isjto give reason because maybe its needed i give warning not to speak to me if it will be an issue i give warningthat if my issues will be problem like they have been then js dont try because you dont haveto do that to yourself though probably all too scaredto admit im a backgrounder now and i shouldve left yuou all alone long ago and im so glad you have newer and better friends and seem to be making a good place here from my perspective it seems your better off if we branch off but thats not my choice i do hope you and the rest of whatever is left of that old group continue to grow and i again apologize about all of this and i have reason for shame andm i hope your a ltleast doin g better and having fun with everyone i still warn that js do whats bets fro yourself we arent close anymore nor related if you consider so it doesnt really matter abt my show i js wanted to make a point to poorly and breielfy i do recognize apologize and tell you you deserve good and all great and youve done so much for everyone and i hope you get better from here yeah idk what to say im kind of dizzy in the head rn but i do mean it wehn i say you deserve better and im sorry ijsdont know how to show it i wish i couldve made this better but mi blank i appreciate your codnsideration
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jiangwanyinscatmom · 3 years
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Twitter is the gift that keeps giving in regards to comprehension. I'm not sure how we get here because Lan Wangji himself has never actually spoke about Jiang Cheng's character. It is Wei Wuxian who actually stops being so giving in excusing Jiang Cheng's actions for good reason. Lan Wangji takes the virtues of the Lan rules to heart when it comes to treating people politely as socially and minimally as possible even when he does not like them.
Wei WuXian, “Have you ever liked anyone?”
Lan WangJi, “Yes.”
All of Wei WuXian’s questions were just for the sake of them, not that he really wanted to find out about Lan WangJi’s private matters. He simply wanted to know whether or not Lan WangJi would really answer whatever he asked. He continued, “How about Jiang Cheng?”
A frown, “Hmph.”
Unless this counts as shit talking, but Lan Wangji is far too refined to badmouth anyone even if he wanted to and doesn't lie when asked for his thoughts.
The worst that came out of him in regards to Jiang Cheng is at Guanyin Temple which is the only time he speaks on anything in regards to how Jiang Cheng has acted and is continuing to attack Wei Wuxian verbally:
Jiang Cheng’s voice harshened, “What do you mean, enough? It’s enough as long as you say so? You know everything! You’re better than me at everything! Whether it be talent or cultivation or spirituality or personality, you guys knew everything while I was much lower—then what am I?!?!”
He suddenly reached out, as if to seize Wei WuXian’s collar. Lan WangJi grabbed Wei WuXian’s shoulder with one hand, letting Wei WuXian stand behind him, and with his other hand he forcefully pushed away Jiang Cheng’s hand. Rage could be seen hidden within his eyes. Although his push held no spiritual energy, it was quite powerful in terms of strength. The wound at Jiang Cheng’s chest ripped apart again. Blood surged.
Jin Ling cried, "Jiujiu, your wound! HanGuang-Jun, spare some mercy!”
However, Lan WangJi’s voice was cold, “Jiang WanYin, spare some virtue!”
Jin Ling has taken the place Wei Wuxian once held with excusing Jiang Cheng's antics here. And what is there for Wei Wuxian to correct? He has learned he does not need to hide his opinions around Lan Wangji and knows very well that Jiang Cheng is awful. Jin Guangyao pressed at this button several times because the only one who hates being told that is Jiang Cheng. Wei Wuxian quips that he knows he is hated by his former sect brother and what Jin Guangyao's point is in addressing him with that.
Wei Wuxian does not owe it to Jiang Cheng to protect his lack of virtues any longer and does not do that when Jiang Cheng was the one to sever their ties and tried to kill him.
Also, they are not family, they are former martial members of the same sect and Jiang Cheng never referred to Wei Wuxian as family. The Lans are the only ones to openly name him as the spouse of Lan Wangji and hence a Lan by marriage. We even get this from Jin Ling at Guanyin Temple before Jiang Cheng's entrance as another nail with Wei Wuxian's assimilation into the Lans over the course of the plot:
Although it wasn’t the only time Wei WuXian knew that hatred could come without a reason, he still couldn’t help but be baffled, “Has HanGuang-Jun ever said he thinks he’s a big deal? If I remember correctly, isn’t ‘arrogance is forbidden’ part of the GusuLan Sect’s rules?”
Jin Ling, “Why do you know what’s part of the GusuLan Sect’s rules?”
Wei WuXian touched his chin, “I’ve copied them too many times, you know?”
Jin Ling blurted, “Why would you copy the GusuLan Sect’s rules? It’s not like you’re…” He wanted to say ‘it’s not like you’re from his sect’, but before he could finish, he felt how odd that would be to say. He stopped talking, his face darkening.
It is at this point that no one wants to extol the virtues of Jiang Cheng because he never had any and his tantrum in part is due to Wei Wuxian always having been kinder and gentler than him which he always hated.
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streetlight11 · 3 years
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Her Promise
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Summary: It wasn’t a secret that you have disliked Sangyeon since you were in diapers. He was your mother’s best friend’s son. Though he was born just 27 days after you, it seems like he was a lot older than you in terms of his maturity. You don’t understand why the bad blood between you two. Until one day, you had been arranged for a marriage with him so suddenly.
Theme: arranged marriage au, enemies to lovers
Genre: angst, sad, fluff
Warnings: mentions of leukaemia, death, alcohol, swearing
WC: 10k
Pairing: Lee Sangyeon x Fem!Reader
a/n: Hello! This plot just randomly came to mind. It's kind of sad and a little angsty but you'll get through reading it. I promise! also, the words in italics is a flashback :)
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Your family has been a close family friend to the Lee’s family and that was because your mother and Mrs Lee were best friends since high school. Also the reason why you were only 27 days older than Mr and Mrs Lee’s only son. However, not everyone has a happy friendship. In this case, it was you and the said son. His name was Lee Sangyeon and it was pretty obvious that you two could never get along since you were in diapers.
Despite your mothers being best friends and have been for the past 30 years, give or take. It’s no wonder that when they were pregnant with the both of you, they kept fighting with each other over small silly things when they barely got past even the slightest of arguments throughout their friendship.
And yet, it seems like luck was never on your side to begin with because throughout your whole education life up till today, he always ends up in your school or at least the school that you chose specifically hoping to be as far from him as possible.
It always baffles you how he would be the first person you spot amongst the crowd during the first day of school.
Did he do all these on purpose?
Why would he go to this extent just to annoy you if you both hated each other?
Maybe he didn’t in fact do this on purpose, but still, what are the odds that you end up in the same campus amongst the hundreds of schools available? That was a mystery you never plan on solving.
It was a bright Tuesday afternoon, students were scattered all over the large campus of Hangang University. You had just parked your car in a free space, exiting your vehicle before proceeding to lock it and walk towards the Computer Science building. You were halfway through the parking lot when someone suddenly swung an arm over your shoulder.
“Good morning my favourite person in the world!” Lisa giggled to your left as Rosie appeared on your right with her usual beaming smile that could melt hearts with just a glance.
“Hey girls, you’re early” You asked with a soft chuckle knowing Lisa was always late for class.
“Yeah, I wanted to leave my apartment now like I always do but Rosie begged me to drive her today because her baby is in the workshop.” Lisa huffs, only for the blonde girl on your right to defend herself.
“Hey, at least we got here on time. You’re welcome.”
With that, Lisa stuck out her tongue at Rosie, earning a laugh from you. The three of you continued to walk to the CS building, only to find Jennie and Jisoo chatting by the lockers while Jennie scavenged through her locker.
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“Ew, is it just me or is the barbeque chicken a little dry today?” Jisoo scowls as she drops the chicken leg back onto her plate.
“No, I agree. It’s foul.” Lisa’s face contorts in disgust before you speak up.
“Do you guys want my salmon instead? I'm kind of full already.” You said, only to find them staring at you in concern. They began asking you if you were feeling okay and if you needed any medication of any sorts. To which you shook your head and just told them you were already full from the breakfast your mother made for you before she left for work with your dad.
Lisa and Jisoo ended up sharing your salmon piece, making you smile. At least your food wouldn’t be wasted, you thought.
A few hours later, your classes for the day were finally over. All you know is that your bed has been waiting for your arrival since the minute you left for school. You left class slightly later, telling the girls you had something to discuss with your lecturer regarding the assignment.
You told them to just head home first and not wait for you.
Almost 20 minutes later, you finally left the lecture room to head towards the parking lot where you had parked your car earlier. Your mind was clouded with the assignment requirements as you scrolled through the soft copy of the assignment through your email, too caught up in your thoughts to notice the group of boys walking down the hall.
That wasn’t until your shoulder roughly collided against someone’s back. It sent your whole body to stumble back from the impact. You were about to apologize when you heard a snicker coming from whoever it was.
So you glanced up and lord behold, it was just the person you were looking for…
Not really.
“Can you pay attention to where you walk? It’s not that hard to use your eyes.” Sangyeon’s voice was monotonous yet a pitch higher than others, just like his ego.
“That’s because you’re in my way, Lee.” You said sarcastically as you walked past him, not forgetting to purposely bump into his arm. He let out a scoff under his breath, fiery glare burning a prominent hole into the back of your head.
God, you can be such a pain in the ass sometimes. Him included.
A few days later, it was finally a Friday. You heard words going around campus saying that one of the seniors in the school’s football team was having a frat party at his place tonight. He invited everyone in the football team, and people that he knew. Turns out he also told his teammates to bring whoever they wanted whether he knows them or not.
Lucky for you (or maybe not), Rosie’s boyfriend happens to be one of the football players. If you remember correctly, his name is Yunhyeong.
And so you already know where this is going.
Hence, the reason why you were now standing right outside the house where the party was held.
No doubt the house was a beautiful landed property at the hills that overlooked the city, it still didn’t give you complete comfort knowing that you would be surrounded by drunk young adults who have no care in the world once the alcohol takes over their system.
Sure you sometimes go to these parties but you weren’t really that type of girl. It’s always an unpleasant surprise to others who aren't your girls, when you decline their offers of alcohol saying you don’t drink.
Though there were instances where you’d have some people still insisting on giving you a drink, you rejected them firmly whether they liked it or not.
And today was no different.
One moment, you were talking to your friends. Another moment, and you were suddenly left alone by the kitchen island. Isolating yourself from the countless intoxicated bodies, dancing freely without a single care in the world.
It suddenly dawned on you that you were indeed alone, with no other individual that you recognize in that huge house. Your friends were scattered around the main living area, each of them either with their significant other or just randomly hooking up with someone. Using alcohol as an excuse to be brave and approach someone at a party like this.
You sighed, reaching into your back pocket to fish for your phone. You were so close to texting them you wanted to head home first, when a deep voice broke your little bubble of thoughts.
“Hey… Y/N right?” The handsome boy asked as he smiled down at you softly.
He clearly didn’t seem too drunk, nor was he completely sober like you.
“Yeah… you are?” You asked, hoping you didn’t sound like a bitch.
“I’m Changkyun. I see your friends have left you so I thought maybe you’d want some company?”
Well, at least he’s being considerate enough.
“About that… I was actually about to-” As you were talking, your eyes were searching the room for at least one of the girls. But instead, your gaze was locked on a specific individual who was leaning against the staircase railings just staring at you with a subtle frown on his face, making your voice halt in your throat.
It was Sangyeon.
You should’ve known he would be there tonight. He’s the freaking midfielder in Hangang U’s soccer team for goodness sake!
For some reason, the moment you met his eyes, it was as though you got sucked into a black hole with no way to escape. That wasn’t until the warm touch on your arm made you jolt away and soon turned back to Changkyun who was now staring at you with worry.
“Hey? You okay? What’s wrong?” He asked, hoping he didn’t scare you away by that simple touch.
“Y-Yeah… Sorry Changkyun, but I think I’m gonna head home. See you around.” You gave him a sincere smile before turning to leave after he said his goodbye.
There is no way you’re gonna stay there any longer. It’s not like you were drunk or anything. Not like you’d expected him to show up in black leather pants, dark grey button down shirt tucked in, his sleeves rolled up to his elbows, his hair parted close to the middle to frame his face and show his forehead, attractively. And definitely not like you felt as though your stomach was doing a flip in your abdomen after seeing him there physically.
Right?
No. You still hate him. He’s just a walking nuisance in your life. You don’t feel anything for him. Maybe he needs to stop appearing in your line of vision every 5 minutes.
It’s been two weeks since that frat party in which you had texted your friends saying you were already at home. Of course you didn’t get a response immediately but they still replied to you the next morning, telling you they were safe and they were glad that you were too.
It was a rainy Wednesday afternoon where students were all stuck on campus with nowhere to go. You were just seated at a wooden table alone with your laptop and scattered notes on the surface when the ray of sunlight that was previously shining down on you, got blocked by a figure.
You glanced up and not surprisingly, it was Sangyeon. He was alone. For once. He was always with his friends, so you wondered why he chose to walk around alone today.
“What?” You asked nonchalantly before looking back down at your laptop.
You heard a scoff from him only for him to speak up, “Did your parents tell you?”
You got confused as you looked back up to him and blinked, incredulously at what he just asked you.
“Tell me what?” You asked. He wasn’t sure if he was faking it or not but he figured with how genuinely confused you look, it was quite clear you weren’t pretending to not know what he was referring to.
“My parents are coming over to your home this weekend to discuss ‘something serious’. I’m not going. I’m not about to sit there and listen to what the ‘something serious’ is, let alone sit there trapped and stare at you the whole night.” Sangyeon said blankly as he burned holes in your head.
“Good. I wouldn’t want you there anyway.” You scoffed, only for him to push himself off the table and smoothed down his shirt.
Sangyeon left without saying anything else, watching as he turned his head as though in search of his friends. However, the minute you looked back down at your laptop, it seems like you missed the way he glanced at you subtly before turning back in front.
That same day, you went home to find your parents in the living room. Your father was watching the news on the flat screen tv while your mother was just watering the potted plants on the shelves.
The minute you stepped into the living room, your father turned to you and smiled brightly, “Oh, sweetie you’re back. We wanted to tell you that Mr and Mrs-” but before he could finish, you did it for him, stunning them in the process.
“-Lee are coming over this weekend to discuss ‘something serious’... I know.”
With that, your mother and father glanced at each other before a smile appeared on their faces again. You already knew what they were about to ask so you beat them to it.
“Sangyeon told me… So what’s so serious that they wanna come over here and talk about it?” You asked, not knowing what to expect but all you got was silence.
“We have to wait till everyone’s there.”
“Not everyone’s gonna be there…” You said.
“What do you mean?” Your mother asked.
“Sangyeon said he’s not coming. He doesn't want to.”
“B-But, he has to be there. It’s important.”
“What’s so important that he has to be there for?” Your voice laced with annoyance at the thought of having to sit in a room with him for minutes too long. Your parents got quiet before your mother spoke up again but for some reason, her voice sounded weak.
“You’ll know on Saturday.” She gave you a weak smile. Too weak to the point that she almost looks… pale?
Why is she pale?
But your mind was too jumbled up with what the main topic for this said family dinner would revolve around. Hence, why you were now sprinting up the steps and to your room. You didn’t want to think about it anymore. You just hoped the weekend passes by before you know it.
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Saturday came in a flash and to say you were ready for whatever family gathering this was, is definitely a lie. You were curious. You were desperate to know just what important business is there to discuss with you and Sangyeon. Despite knowing he won’t be there for whatever this meeting is about, it still rendered you curious on just how important this said matter is.
You were told to look presentable even though you’ll just be at home. So you pulled out the nicest outfit you could find and just opted for a simple blouse and your denim jeans.
Once you were done getting ready, you left your room only to hear your mother calling out to you from downstairs, “Y/N sweetie, the Lee’s are here!”
You made your way down the marbled steps, ready to greet the elder couple when your eyes fell on their son who clearly said he wasn’t going to be here. But of course, it looked like he had been forced against his own will to be here and you were right.
“Oh! My sweet Y/N! It’s been so long. How are you my dear?” Mrs Lee asked as you broke your gaze from Sangyeon only to smile happily when you looked at his parents.
“Hello Mr and Mrs Lee. I’m doing well despite my crazy uni life. I hope you’re both well and healthy!” You said as Mrs Lee hugged you warmly like how she had been doing since you were young.
After greeting them, the 6 of you began walking to your dining room. You then turned to Sangyeon who was walking beside you, only to ask out of curiosity, “Didn’t you say you weren’t gonna come?”
With that, he turns to you and shoots daggers at you through his glare but it does nothing to scare you away.
“Do I look like I wanna be here?”
“Clearly.” You said, just to get on his nerves and it did.
“Fuck you.”
“I’d gladly fuck myself too.”
Sangyeon frowns at your comment despite knowing it was sarcastic. But he still found it amusing that it came out from your mouth. Sure you’ve cursed him a lot of times when you fought with him, but this was a different thing.
All of you finally sat down in the dining room, you helped your mother set the table.
A few minutes went by and everyone was just chatting amongst one another. Well, more specifically the elders while you and Sangyeon simply sat there across each other in silence. You were absentmindedly picking on your food, suddenly losing appetite.
All you wanted was for them to start discussing the very important business. Which is why your patience has run thin, making you blurt out the question that has been floating in your head since Wednesday.
“What’s the important thing you called me and Sangyeon here for?”
The room fell silent as you kept your eyes on your plate of untouched food. Completely ignoring the way Sangyeon had his eyes trained on you. After what felt like hours, your mother finally announced it.
It made your heart stop for a moment.
“We have decided to marry you off with Sangyeon.”
That was the last thing you ever wanted to hear from them. Never did you expect it to be this. Why were they doing this to you? Of course you know you’re single and not dating anyone but still… How could they?
“What?!” Both you and Sangyeon said in unison.
Tension filled the air, thick in its wake. You couldn’t look elsewhere except for your mother who had announced the news.
“You’ve got to be kidding me…” You mumbled under your breath as Sangyeon got up, letting the chair drag painfully across the wooden floor. His mother grabbed his wrist to stop him but he roughly yanked his wrist from her and simply replied with his firm answer, “There’s no way I’m marrying her. I’m out.”
Sangyeon stormed out and you were so tempted to do the same but all you could do was glare at your parents in disbelief.
“Sweetie-” Your mom began but you were quick to interject.
“No! That’s not happening! Mom, you know we hate each other! How can you ask me to marry him when I don’t even love him?!” Your voice was raised as you stood up from your seat. Blood boils in your veins, heart pounding rapidly in your chest out of pure anger. You wanted nothing more but to scream.
You turned in your heels to leave but your mother caught your hands when you were about to reach the stairs. You pulled your hand from her grip, throwing your arm behind your back from the force.
“Sweetie please, listen to me-”
“No mom! I’m not marrying him and that’s final!” You yelled, too furious to even notice the way your mom had clutched her chest as her breathing started to become shallow.
Before you knew it, your mother collapsed to the ground but you were quick to catch her body right when she was about to crash onto the hard wooden floor.
“Mom!” You gasped as your dad and both of Sangyeon’s parents rushed over to where you were.
Mr Lee called the ambulance in which they came just 10 minutes later, carrying your mother’s unconscious body onto the stretcher and bringing her into the ambulance. Your father followed her in the vehicle while Mr Lee offered you a ride there.
Hours passed and you were waiting patiently outside the ER when a doctor came out. Your dad rushed over so you could only guess that she was the one who attended to your mom.
“Doctor, how’s my wife?”
“Your wife’s still under constant checks but so far, her heart is beating stably. However, it seems that her abnormal white blood cells have rapidly multiplied since her last check up.” The doctor said, making you frown.
“White blood cells? What’s going on? What’s wrong with my mother?” You asked desperately, still not sure of what’s going on.
“Your mother was diagnosed with Leukaemia stage 2 but from what I saw today, I believe it’s now up to stage 4.” The doctor announced, making you even more confused.
“What?” You whispered as you stared at your dad, hoping that it’s not true. But all you got was a disheartened smile that broke you into a million pieces.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” You whispered to him sadly, upset that they’ve been keeping this a secret from you.
“I’m sorry baby, but your mother told me not to. She… She didn’t want you to get worried.” He replied.
You don’t understand. You knowing about this was better than keeping it hidden from you. If you had known about this sooner, you wouldn’t have shouted at her. Instead, you would have taken extra care of her. You would have given her more love than what she gave you. And you wouldn’t have to stand here, right now, hoping for your mother’s safety and health.
You slumped onto one of the chairs, staring into space as your father rubbed soft circles into your back to calm you down.
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Three days passed and you have been visiting your mother at the hospital diligently after your classes. You stayed till night time, allowing your dad to fetch you from the hospital after he also came by to visit your mom.
You were currently alone in the room with your mom as your dad went out to buy dinner for all three of you.
She was just lying there sleeping peacefully after having a deep conversation with her about some things, her eyes now closed, breathing consistent, chest heaving up and down according to her oxygen intake.
You were just about to doze off when the heart rate monitor suddenly began beeping rapidly. It caused you to panic as you ran out of the room to call for the nurses.
When you came back, your mother was shaking on the hospital bed. Tears started streaming down your face as you found yourself curled up in the corner just watching the hospital staff do whatever is necessary to help your mother.
You didn’t notice your dad who had just come back, only to rush to you after putting the food down on the desk. It was when he cupped your face, that you finally realized his presence.
He pulled you against him as you couldn’t tear your eyes off your mother’s figure, shaking violently on the bed.
It was as though someone had dropped a bomb just a few feet away, a deafening silence pierced your ear drums followed by the single beep sound that was continuous without a pause. The sound soon became a mere ring in your ears.
You slowly brought your line of sight towards the heart rate monitor beside your mother’s bed and that’s when you saw it. The painful straight line with no spikes going up or down.
That’s when you knew, she was gone.
No. This can’t be real. This is just a dream. Wake up Y/N. Pinch yourself. Slap yourself. Do whatever it is to wake yourself up from this nightmare!
And yet, you’re still there in your dad’s arms listening to the nurse who wrote down the words you never hoped to hear.
“Patient is Jeong Hyemin. Time of death, 2143hrs.”
All the more you cried harder against your father’s chest. You were broken. Completely and utterly broken. Your mother left you before you could even say goodbye. She left before you could even tell her that you love her unconditionally even though you told her that everyday.
As much as your heart hurts, you knew you had to accept it. You knew you had to be strong for your mother. And that was exactly what you did.
The next whole week, you didn’t come to school. You emailed your lecturers personally and told them about your loss. They all sent you their well wishes for you and your dad, to which they excused you from school to attend your mother’s funeral. It broke you but you couldn’t collapse just then.
Your mother would want you to be happy, to continue living a wonderful life, with or without her. And that’s exactly what you were gonna do.
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The next two weeks came as a blur and you were dreading for the day to finally arrive. You couldn’t bring yourself to look in the mirror and see what you looked like. Because at that very moment, you were in an item of clothing where you never thought you would wear anytime soon.
It was a wedding dress. Your wedding dress. It has finally come to this.
Your makeup stylist did a few touch ups to your eyeshadow whilst another lady adjusted the bow on your waist that separates your laced top with your beautiful silk gown that drops to the floor elegantly behind you.
If you were being honest, you had hoped for this very day to come when you would walk down the aisle with your arm linked with your dad’s while your mother stood at the front row, watching you proudly. Witnessing you entering a new life with your chosen partner whom you’d love with all your heart.
Unfortunately, it wasn’t the case for you and it hurts you. But you kept telling yourself the same thing over and over again.
“I have to stay strong.”
That was the last thing you mumbled to yourself as you left the bride’s room, only to head towards the outdoor wedding ceremony where your parents had already booked an incredibly beautiful mansion located at the highest hills of the city.
It was a small ceremony with only your family and his, and very close relatives of both sides but that was it. None of your friends were there but you already told them about today.
Little did you know, his friends knew about it too.
You were approaching the outdoor garden where everyone was waiting for you when all of a sudden, your emotions started swirling in you.
A tear rolled down your cheek the minute you saw your dad standing at the doorway which leads you directly down the aisle. Your dad gave you a soft smile before cupping your face and kissing your forehead. He wiped the tear away with his thumb as he whispered, “You look so beautiful, sweetheart. I’m sure your mother would be so happy to see you like this.”
With that, you had to force your tears back, swallowing them as you nodded before linking your arm with his.
The song started playing and soon, both of you began to walk down the aisle. The first thing you saw was Sangyeon standing at the foot of the platform. He was wearing a navy blue tuxedo, looking quite handsome if you were being completely honest.
But the frown on his face was evident enough for you to know that he didn’t like this as much as you didn’t like this either.
Once you were standing just two feet away, you turned to your dad who kissed you again on the forehead before putting your hand in Sangyeon’s outstretched ones. After your dad left your side, Sangyeon guided you up the steps carefully.
His touch was soft, almost as if he wasn’t touching you at all. Minutes went by and right after you’ve both said your vows, it was time for the exchange of rings and sealing the deal with a kiss but of course, neither of you agreed to it. So when you were officially announced as husband and wife, you both looked at each other with a familiarity in your eyes which screamed “I hate all of this”.
Sangyeon lets out a soft groan before planting a chaste kiss to your temple, pulling away as soon as he kisses.
Both of you walked back down the aisle and once you were in the mansion, it took you less than a second to walk away from him and make your way straight to the bride’s makeup room.
Sangyeon didn’t bother to call for you as he too made his way to the common room, wanting to be as far away from you as possible. He hated every single minute of this. He never wanted this. But he was being forced to. And he doesn’t even know why.
When he heard from his parents that you accepted the arranged marriage, it baffled him.
You were both so adamant on rejecting this whole fiasco during that night of the dinner so what changed your mind?
That was a question he could never solve.
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Days became weeks and you had moved into the new home that his parents and yours bought for Sangyeon and you to live in. It was a beautiful one story home that had 3 bedrooms, one study room, one living room and a backyard complete with a swimming pool. You were thankful for the home but you didn’t think it was necessary considering the state that you and Sangyeon were being put in.
Nevertheless, you didn’t want to disappoint the elders. Hence the reason why you moved in with Sangyeon without a single argument with your dad and in-laws.
Unfortunately, the fact that you two were now living under the same roof, it was quite expected of you to end up fighting over the smallest little things. If being within radius of each other on campus brought unnecessary snickers and curses to one another, living under the same roof only heightened those said things by 80%.
There wasn’t a day where you could walk around the house peacefully unless the other wasn't home.
It has been 8 weeks since you lived there with him. Despite the constant fights and heated arguments that the two of you often get into, none of it leads to the other doing unfaithful things behind each other’s back.
Before the marriage, it was quite clear that you weren’t in any sort of relationship with anyone nor were you the kind to sleep around with strangers you just met at a club or parties. Whereas, Sangyeon on the other hand was completely that, except he too was single. He tends to sleep around with girls he met at a party or the clubs he went to.
But never did he actually pursue any of his one night stands because he simply didn’t feel that way for them.
However, when he got married to you despite being against it, he made a promise to himself that he should not do all those things to you even if he doesn’t love you. Because he knows that it’s wrong and that he despises people who cheat on their partners.
For that, he told himself not to be that monster.
And he didn’t. Thankfully.
But that doesn’t mean he couldn’t storm out of the house after an argument just to get fresh air and be away from you at that very moment.
This goes both ways as sometimes, you would do the same if you couldn’t stand being in radius of him.
But tonight was different.
You were just washing the dishes when the front door opened to reveal a very drained Sangyeon who had just gotten back from the gym.
He strolled through down the hallway with his duffle bag strap resting on his right shoulder, the wet patches on his grey tank top sticking to his torso, black track shorts resting on his hips. His hair was slicked back from being drenched in sweat.
You spared him a quick glance over your shoulder before you turned back to the dirty dishes. Unfortunately for you, he caught you glancing just in time.
He walked past you to go to the fridge after putting his bag down on the floor, opening it and immediately grabbing the bottle of iced water sitting there patiently for him to take it. He downed half the bottle in less than 5 seconds, only to hear him let out a satisfied sigh right after.
You remained quiet as he looked at you for a moment, a small part of him wanted to ask you if you’ve eaten but a bigger part of him, more so his ego, was telling him to walk away.
For some reason, he decided to go with the former. Something he hasn’t been doing all these years.
“Had your dinner yet?” He asked, making you turn off the tap after setting down the clean dish onto the rack above your head before turning to him with a slight confusion on your face.
“Mhm. You?”
“Not yet.” He said as he leaned his hip against the counter top.
“What do you feel like eating?” You asked, wiping your hands dry with the towel hanging off the hook on the wall.
“I kind of have the feel for kimchi fried rice… I’ll just make do with what is there in the fridge. No worries.” Sangyeon said with a soft smile on his face before he left to take a long shower. Something he always did when he had a lot going on in his mind.
The minute he left, you stared at his descending back for a minute before turning back with a confused frown on your face.
Sangyeon was in the shower for almost 20 minutes. Taking a warm bath to calm his tensed muscles due to the intense workout he did with Juyeon and Hyunjae earlier. After his stress relieving bath, Sangyeon changed into a pair of sweatpants and his oversized shirt he normally uses to sleep.
He towel dried his hair, leaving it in an utter mess on his head with no care whatsoever.
He simply brushed through his wet locks with his fingers haphazardly before leaving his bedroom toilet. Sangyeon and you weren’t sharing bedrooms. It was just a mutual agreement right from the first night together.
You took the master bedroom in this house while he took the second bedroom.
Sangyeon was just walking down the hall, scratching the back of his head randomly when he caught a strong whiff of something delicious filling his nostrils.
“What the?” He whispered to himself as he cautiously made his way closer to the end of the hall. The minute he made a right turn, that’s when he saw you scooping out the contents of the pan into a clean plate. To his surprise, it was the exact dish he told you he was planning to cook earlier.
He finally stepped out of the shadows, only to startle you.
You flinched but that was it.
“Hey… I figured you’d be too tired to cook so I made it for you. Just leave the plate in the sink after you’re done. I’ll wash it later.” You pressed your lips into a small little smile before placing the dish on the kitchen island together with a spoon.
Right when you were about to leave the kitchen, his voice stopped you from walking any further only to hear him whisper a soft “thank you” to you.
You gave him a nod and soon left.
Sangyeon stares at your descending back before you disappear from his trail of sight, only to then tilt his head in amusement at your sudden kind act. For some reason, he found himself smiling as he took a mouthful of your delicious fried rice.
Another 3 weeks went by and you had just gotten back from your night study session with Lisa and Jennie, only to find Sangyeon slumped on the couch. He had his face buried in his hands as he looked like he hadn’t slept for days.
You frowned as you locked the door and soon went over to stand behind the long couch, diagonally from the couch he was sitting at.
“Rough day?” You asked quietly, but all you got was silence so you tried again.
“Have you eaten?”
Silence.
“Do you want anything to eat?”
Silence.
“Sangyeon, even if you hate me, at least say yes or no so I can-” And that’s when he bursts.
“Shut the fuck up!” Sangyeon yelled as he glared at you. His nostrils flared upon every heavy breath he took. You were stunned by his harsh tone, clearly not wanting any argument when you first asked the question.
“Excuse me?” You asked with a tone that was pretty obvious to anyone that you were clearly offended by his words.
“Didn’t you hear me?! I said shut the fuck up!” Sangyeon stood tall, his face red as you could only imagine he was stressed about something. A scoff left your lips, feeling the anger seeping through your skin with every word he said to you.
“Why? Why do you want me to shut the fuck up so badly?!” You asked as you stared at him with mixed emotions.
“God, you’re so fucking annoying!” Sangyeon growled as he began to storm off but you stopped him by grabbing his wrist.
“Answer my fucking question, Lee Sangyeon! I was just being nice and caring about your well being and all I got was to shut up? You’re a fucking asshole you know that?” You said, your words filled with venom as he gritted his teeth, jaw clenching tight.
“Who taught you to be such a brat? Your mother?” Sangyeon accidentally blurted that out of sheer anger. Your grip around his wrist left and the next thing he knew, your eyes were glossy from the tears threatening to fall.
“Don’t bring my mother into this.” You warned but he was still fuming with anger.
“Why? Why can’t I?! She’s the only reason why we’re in this stupid marriage anyway!”
You didn’t know what ran through your mind but the minute those words left his mouth, you couldn’t help but swing your hand onto his cheek. This shocked him to a certain extent as he simply glared at you but never did anything to hurt you physically.
“Do you know why I accepted the marriage proposal? Do you wanna know why I decided to walk down that fucking aisle and have myself being called as your official wife?! Well here’s the reason why. I promised my mom I would.” You paused as he remained quiet. You could almost see the cogs turning in his brain as though trying to process your words.
“My mom died wanting me to marry you. She told me she wanted to see me walk down the aisle one day and into your arms. Until now, I don’t understand why she specifically wants it to be you, but that’s what she wanted. So I promised her that she would be there for when that day comes. But she left me before she could even witness that for herself. She left before I could even say goodbye. It broke me. It fucking broke me Sangyeon! That’s why I chose to accept the proposal even when…”
You stopped for a moment, not realizing that you had been crying until you tasted salty tears on your lips.
“...even when I didn’t love you. I did it because I made a promise to her. I don’t want to let her down, Sangyeon.... I never wanted any of this to happen. And I know you feel the same so I’m sorry.” Those were the last things you said to him before going to your bedroom and locking yourself in there.
Sangyeon was left standing there, feeling completely shitty with what he said to you earlier. He never meant to hurt your feelings. He should’ve known better not to mention your mom but he only said that out of pure anger.
He knows it’s his fault but his ego was too high for him to simply give in to his mistake.
He was about to just brush this off when he heard the door click and soon, you were seen leaving your bedroom with a cross body purse on you. You didn’t give him the chance to speak as you just left the house with a soft slam of your front door. He watched as you took your white mini cooper and drove out of the driveway.
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“Sweetie, why don’t you want to accept the proposal?” Your mother asked weakly as you sat on the chair beside her hospital bed.
“Mom, you know I don’t love him. We’ve been fighting since we were kids. I don’t see why I should marry someone who I don’t love.”
“Oh sweetie, you can only learn to love by loving.”
“Mom, that’s just fairy tale talk.”
“Do you wanna know something?” She asked as you stared at her quietly while you caressed the back of her hand with your thumbs as he took this silence to continue.
“Your father and I weren’t on good terms too when we first met each other. We always fought in high school and it went on for quite a while until Mrs Lee set me up on this blind date and it was with your father. At first we found it ridiculous, but after that first date, I realized that maybe your father wasn’t as bad as I thought. And so, we started to slowly understand the process of loving someone and soon enough, we fell in love. Love doesn’t always come to you directly. Sometimes, you need to find it yourself.”
She paused, studying your facial expressions carefully to make sure you weren’t angry or about to burst at her for the next thing she was planning to say.
“Can you promise me something sweetie?”
“Anything… Anything at all mom.” You said with a glint of hope in your eyes.
“Can you promise me that you’ll marry Mrs Lee’s son? I don’t care when. Just… as long as it’s him. Even if I’m not around anymore...”
“Mom-”
“Please? For me?”
Your heart broke hearing her pleading voice. You don’t understand why she was so persistent in you marrying him but for now, you couldn’t bear to say no. You couldn’t bear to break her heart. So, with a heavy heart, you chose your mother’s happiness before yours.
“Okay mom… I promise. But you have to promise me too that you’ll be fine and that you’ll come back to me and dad, okay?”
“I promise, sweetheart. I love you so much.” She said.
“I love you too mom.”
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That night when you came back to your old house, your dad greeted you at the door with a shocked look on his face. He asked you why you were there at such a late time so you explained to him that you got into a big fight with Sangyeon and that you wanted to stay there for the next few days. Of course your father was happy that he would finally have someone in the house with him, but he was also worried that Sangyeon would be concerned over you.
You told him not to tell Sangyeon anything and that you wanted time away from him for now, in which your dad just nodded understandingly. The next few days, you spent your days diligently avoiding Sangyeon as much as you can despite being in the same campus. Lucky for you, he had very different schedules than you.
Which means, better chance for you to avoid him and not accidentally bump into him on campus grounds. And so far, your plan is working.
It’s been at least 3 weeks since you last went home to your shared place with him and you were starting to run low on your clothing supply back at your old house. Which means, you probably had no choice but to go back there now.
In all honesty, you weren’t mad at him anymore.
You were just too stubborn to face him after that argument. But it looks like you have no other choice now.
Hence, the reason why you were currently standing outside your doorstep at 8pm, noticing the vehicles parked outside your gates. By the looks of it, those probably belonged to his friends. And you were right. Because the minute you unlocked the door, you were immediately greeted by the chattering and laughter coming from the living room.
You walked in further, carefully after taking off your shoes and placing them in the shoe rack. Right when you had just made it by the end of the hallway and the living room was in full view, that’s where you saw the 6 figures scattered around the room.
The TV was playing a movie while the coffee table was filled with boxes of pizzas and other snacks for them to munch on.
Before you could speak up, two of them noticed your presence, making the blonde haired one to say hi, “Oh, hi Y/N.”
With that, the rest of them finally turned around upon hearing their friend greet you. Sangyeon, who was standing right in front of the TV, checking the cables, whipped his head around only to lock eyes with you. He froze in his spot, unsure if this was real considering you’ve been avoiding him like a plague the past 3 weeks.
“Y/N…” Was the only thing he managed to whisper under his breath as you awkwardly chuckled, hoping you didn’t create an unsettling atmosphere for them.
“Hey…” You whispered as he carefully made his way to you. The moment he was standing right in front of you, neither of you spoke. Both of you are afraid of saying the wrong thing which could potentially lead to another argument. But Sangyeon was smart enough to know not to make unnecessary comments to you after what happened the last time. So instead, he opted for an apology.
“Listen, about that night… I- I’m really sorry… I didn’t... I didn’t know.”
You could only give him a small smile that he could clearly see was weak and almost drained as you spoke up, “It’s okay. Anyways… I think I’m gonna rest.”
He simply nodded, resisting the urge to pull you into a hug and tell you how sorry he was for treating you like crap all these while. These past 3 weeks have made him realise that he wasn’t the nicest of people to you, that he said a lot of things that had definitely hurt you in the past, that he has been nothing but mean to you.
Upon hearing your bedroom door close, Sangyeon lets out a defeated sigh before walking back to his friends who then asked him if everything was okay. After he told them that everything was indeed okay, he plopped back down on the couch but it seemed to worry his friends seeing how sad Sangyeon looked at the moment.
Whenever he was with them, he has always been the goofy, savage, often picking on the others to get a reaction out of them, kind of guy. They’ve never properly seen this softer side of him.
It’s been nearly an hour since you came home and yet, he hasn’t caught a single glimpse of you anywhere. He got worried for you, not knowing whether you’ve eaten or not. So he decided to check on you. He got up from the ground to excuse himself, telling them to just continue what they were doing.
When he arrived at your supposedly shared bedroom, he found you seated on the window couch just staring into the night sky. However, before he could even knock on the door and push it wider, he heard soft sobs from you that gradually grew louder. He stayed by the door and unintentionally listened to your whispers.
“I miss you mum… I’m sorry if I couldn’t live up to my promise just like you wanted me to. I know I’m not the best wife to him, but I’m trying… I’m trying… for you. I wish you were still here beside me. To guide me on how to be a good wife. To love someone without feeling trapped. To love someone the way you and dad loves me. I’m so sorry mum… I’m so truly sorry…”
Sangyeon’s heart shattered into a million pieces for you. That’s when he realized that his feelings for you had changed. That all he wanted to do right at this very moment was to protect you. You were broken, fragile and yet, he’s been treating you horribly all these while.
He couldn’t take it any longer. With that being said, he carefully and quietly made his way to you. Not making a sound as you had your head buried in your knees, cries getting louder the closer he came to you. However, when you felt his soft hands caress the sides of your arms, you looked up. Your eyes glistened under the moonlight, your cheeks soaked with your freshly falling tears.
At that moment, you looked so vulnerable.
So when he pulled you into his embrace, you easily let him. Burying your face into his chest as he gently rubs circles onto your back, caressing your head comfortingly.
After a few seconds of silence, you finally whispered against his chest. Just loud enough for him to hear, but soft enough that nobody standing outside the door could hear.
“I miss her Sangyeon…”
Sangyeon wasn’t sure how to respond to your confession but he tried as best as he could to make you feel better.
“And I know that she misses you too. But it’s okay, she will always be with you. You’ll be okay… I promise.” He whispered and almost immediately, you pulled back as he frowned in confusion.
“You shouldn’t promise me anything…” You said, your tears slowly getting lesser and lesser by the minute.
“Why do you say that?”
“Because the last time someone made me a promise, they promised me that they’ll be okay and that they’ll never leave me… And yet she did...” Your voice hushed. He could tell that that was your trauma. Making promises.
He felt a tear threatening to roll down his cheek but he managed to hold back. Sangyeon softly reached up to cup your face and caress your cheeks with both thumbs before he spoke up, “I’m sorry she did. I’m sorry that promise got broken. But it’s not her fault. You know it wasn’t. So let me make a promise to you now and this time, it won’t be broken.”
With that being said, you cried even harder as he just pulled you against his chest almost cradling you like a child. After almost 20 minutes in the room, he finally let go of your fragile figure and asked if you wanted to eat.
You told him you weren’t hungry and that you just wanted to rest. Sangyeon nodded, bringing you to the bed as he carefully tucked you in to make you cosy. He was about to leave you alone when you grabbed his wrists. Sangyeon turned around with such a soft gaze on you, it nearly melted you.
“Where are you going?” You asked with a soft voice, almost shy. Sangyeon found it so endearing that he couldn’t help but chuckle softly.
“I’m gonna go back to the boys and maybe call it a night early.” He smiled, to which you felt his other hand come to wrap its fingers around your extended wrist, gently pulling it away before caressing the back of your wrist with his thumb.
“Can you come back after… please?” You whispered as you saw him smile again before putting your hand down on the mattress softly.
“I will.”
Soon enough, Sangyeon left you in the room to rest for a bit while he went back to his friends and relayed the message to them. Thankfully, the boys were very understanding. They told Sangyeon to send their well wishes to you in which he definitely would. After they left, Sangyeon went ahead and cleared the leftover trash.
Silently thanking the boys for cleaning most of the mess up before he even came back into the living room. He was almost done cleaning, not forgetting to brush his teeth before going back to your room only to find you already asleep with your back facing the door.
Sangyeon couldn’t help but smile as he closed the door behind him and soon made his way quietly to the other side of the room.
He carefully pulled the duvet up, climbing into bed after putting the duvet back down.
He very gently lifted your head up to let his right arm slide under your neck as a pillow, proceeding to pull your body closer against his chest. Once you were both in a comfortable position, he gently wrapped his other hand around your waist. Caressing your side in a comforting manner.
“Goodnight Y/N.” He whispered as he soon drifted off into slumber.
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Ever since then, both of you had stopped the constant arguments. You weren’t always annoyed by every little thing the other did. In school, when you’d accidentally bump into one another, either one would smile and acknowledge the other. Some people who witnessed this, found it strange but your close friends didn’t.
It’s been a good 4 months since you’d reconciled with Sangyeon. Though there were disagreements at times, those arguments would however, be resolved as quickly as it came.
But one thing’s for sure, is that during the past 4 months, you and Sangyeon had slowly found yourselves falling for each other. Neither of you said it out loud, but apparently those around you could visibly tell. Especially your friends.
It was a Thursday afternoon, you and the girls were just walking to the lunch hall when Lisa spotted Sangyeon and his friends just walking down the main building. It seems like they were heading towards the lunch hall as well. With that being said, Lisa called out to Sangyeon’s name, causing him and the rest to turn.
The minute Sangyeon’s eyes locked on Lisa’s and then on you, his gaze softened as you saw the corner of his lips curving upwards into a cute smirk.
They stopped walking to let you girls catch up and once you did, Lisa immediately went to Juyeon and began talking to him casually. The other girls went to walk with the rest while you came to a quick stop beside Sangyeon before you continued walking with the others ahead of you.
“How was class?” He asked, his arm accidentally brushing against yours as you walked further down the building.
“Horrible. Can you believe he wants us to submit 10 codes by the end of this week? I swear that man wants me dead.” You groaned in annoyance, only to hear him chuckle. But what he said next, caught you by surprise.
“But I don’t want you dead.”
With that, you turned to him as a small smile appeared on your face despite the frown you had. Both of you walked in silence, just basking in the conversations of your friends when you felt a soft tickling feeling on your fingers.
You glanced down to see that his hand was playfully brushing against your fingers, making you look up to catch him already staring at you.
Sangyeon smiled at you innocently, not sure if he wanted to say anything else until he felt you slide your hand into his, lacing your fingers with his easily. Now it was his turn to look down and then back up at you. All he did was chuckle, a sound you could definitely get used to.
A week passed and it was finally the weekend. You and Sangyeon didn’t have anything planned for the day.
Or at least you thought.
You were just lounging on the couch on a beautiful Saturday evening when Sangyeon came over to plop down beside you with a cheeky smile on his face.
“You’re oddly happy? What’s going on?” You asked with a raise of your eyebrow.
“I have a surprise for you but you have to go get ready okay?”
“Get ready? It’s already 7 o’clock. Where can we go?” You asked but all you got was a soft whine from him telling you to just do it. You opted to listen as he reminded you to wear prettily. You weren’t sure where you were going so you didn’t want to either overdress or underdress.
So you opted for simple denim skinny jeans, a baby blue sleeveless top, a white long knit cardigan and a pair of beige chunky heeled sandals.
When you left your shared bedroom to go to the living room, you were surprised to see him dressed handsomely in his black skinny jeans, a white button down shirt with the first few buttons undone, along with a navy blue bomber jacket. You saw him look at your outfit from head to toe, only for him to smirk playfully at you.
“Damn, who knew my wife could look this beautiful?” Sangyeon teased, making you giggle.
“Sangyeon, I literally wear jeans everyday.”
“Exactly.”
When you realized what he was trying to say, you soon found yourself blushing as you walked over to him and gently slapped his chest with your hand. Urging him to go before you slapped that cute smirk off his face.
Sangyeon couldn’t help but laugh but nonetheless left the house in his matte black Bentley. You watched as he drove down the street, bringing you to a part of the city where you don’t remember going to before in your life. The car ride was filled with jokes and laughter coming from both of you. He distracted you too much to the point where you didn’t even notice you were already at the location he wanted to bring you.
You looked out the window and that’s when you realize, “Is this an outdoor cinema?” You gasped when you saw the open field with a large screen at the centre, along with the endless rows of couples seated on their own blankets with snacks and drinks of their preferences.
“Sangyeon… This is…” You were speechless and he could see.
He chuckled as he just stared at you with such endearment in his eyes. Some people would just call it love.
“It’s wonderful.” You finally got to finish your sentence, turning to him with a smile.
“I’m glad you think so. Now let’s go! The movie’s about to start.”
Two hours had passed and you were now a few minutes in of the second movie. You noticed some couples were starting to get comfortable on their blankets. You were starting to get tired just sitting up straight and Sangyeon noticed your subtle shifts, desperate to find a comfortable sitting position.
“Hey, you okay?” He asked quietly.
“Yeah. I’m okay, just a little tired from sitting up.” You explained with a bashful little smile. Just then, Sangyeon thought of an idea that was completely beyond your imagination.
Hence, when he patted the space in between his legs, you glanced down and then back at him who was seen smiling softly to you. None of it was making you feel creeped out. In fact, you felt safe and that you could trust him. After all, he was your husband anyways. Of course you trust him.
“Come here.” He said as he stared at you calmly. He wasn’t sure if you were entirely up for this but before he could take his words back, that’s when he saw you carefully crawling towards the space he patted earlier.
Once you were seated in front of him, Sangyeon scooted forward a little before he slid his arms around your waist.
He soon pulled you against his chest, before he whispered in your ear, “Comfortable?”
You turned your head to look at him but instead got slightly flustered by the close proximity that led you to feeling his lips accidentally brush against your own. You got quiet for a moment, praying that he didn’t hear the way your heart was pounding against your chest.
You couldn’t trust your voice so you opted for a soft hum to answer his question. The next few minutes, you found yourself getting more and more comfortable in his arms, putting your hands on top of his forearms as you unconsciously caressed his skin in a calming manner. All the while, Sangyeon was behind you, completely distracted from the movie in front of him.
Instead, his mind was fuzzy with how close you were to him at that very moment. This was something he never thought would happen back when he was still young.
But now that he was here with you, just cuddling at an outdoor movie theatre, he couldn’t help but want more of this. Sangyeon found himself smiling as he couldn’t help but give your sides a gentle squeeze, telling you that he was there with you and that he would never leave you.
Thankfully, you got the silent message.
Because right after he did that, you turned your head to look at him. His eyes held the galaxy. You found yourself getting lost in his eyes.
Both of you were silent but it wasn’t awkward. You didn’t know what came over you but a sense of confidence washes over you. With that being said, you carefully leaned forward to close the gap and soon pressed your lips on his.
To say he was taken aback slightly, is definitely an understatement.
But it took him less than 3 seconds to finally move his lips against yours in a smooth rhythm. You brought your right hand up to gently cup his face as you kissed him.
Sangyeon tightens his hold on you, pulling away from the kiss only to look into your eyes with such adoration. He wasn’t sure if now was the right time to express his feelings for you, but he thought, what was there to lose. So with that thinking, Sangyeon took a small breath before he uttered the 3 words he never thought he’d say to you but he did. And every single word he said at that moment, was as sincere as ever.
“I love you.”
You couldn’t help but smile softly at him before you kissed him again in a longing kiss before pulling away and replying to him with the exact emotions you felt for him genuinely.
“I love you too, Sangyeon.”
~~~
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yuzuruspoohsan · 5 years
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When Yuzu said he had given up happiness, i think maybe he had someone he really liked/loved and chose skating over couple... what you think? He's handsome, smart and funny.... i'm sure some girls were interested on him.....
As a good friend who has taken great strides to teach me would say: “that’s a very amatonormative thing to assume.”
Now he may or may not had to do that (who can tell), but he definitely given up on a numbeerrrr of happinesses.
Happiness comes in forms more than one. To assume that he given up “love” and that is the happiness he spoke of is actually a huge stretch. Why?Because happiness comes from a multi-clasm of things and aspects of the tangible and intangible. People can find happiness in so many things.   
But the media, social media, society, and cultural values often instill the idea of amatonormativity, which is that “love rules above all else.” (And boy....have I been educating myself about all the different kinds love other than “romantic love.” So many! Some more appealing to me than thiss so called “romaannttiiccc lovee.”) 
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In truth, while love is often advertised as “the should be” and the “greatest” desire and thing you ought to and will ever have, is not the case for everyone. And we should not always assume that everyone desires or to be in a romantic relationship.
(If you think about it, amatonormativity can be hurtful and give rise to some socio-societal issues…..but I am not the best person to turn to for that kind of juicy read Q w Q. I would love to take a course on it or study it….but I was not blessed with financial leisure.) 
When Yuzu said happiness, I do not think he meant something specific such as just a romantic relationship, and if I remember correctly, I think he said he given up a number of things, “many happinesses.” 
You need to take into account that he could’ve retired after Sochi or any other years in the past. He could’ve retired and went back to living a normal life, going to college (like physically going to campus, not online courses), hanging out with his friends on a daily basis, or checking off things on his bucket list, but he didn’t choose that life. 
He pushed doing what he wanted to get better at, figure skating. And now he’s a rock star in Japan, but being super famous also has some major downsides. He can’t even go on public transit without the paparazzi finding him or the other passengers gagaing over him. (It must be a terrifying thought for him….hence why he must shuttle around in a car.)
He is ever vigilant that his privacy and the details of those close to him would be compromised. A little while back, there was even a huge rumor he was getting married, which turned out to be false and he needed to go so far to make a public announcement that it was not true and you could see on his face that he was very very upset (I saw the video awhile back and you can take my word for it.) 
These are all things you must take into account what he meant by happiness. 
Now, I don’t want you to think I’m rejecting your idea at all. I am just stating my own opinion on the thought. I personally feel that he had given up on some things that are more important than just “someone he liked” (which we don’t know anything about and shouldn’t push the idea). You don’t know what you’ve lost until you’re in that situation. I, for one, would hate to lose my independence and privacy.
Like I lovvveee food. I would hate to be that person who cannot hang out with her girl friends to eat at a cute cafe or restaurant because I cannot be seen in public without a horde of people trying to take a photo of me. I would never in a million years ever want that to happen. I would neverrrr give up the life I have and all the joys I receive in my normal life. 
And heyyy, I admit I thought he might’ve had a crush here or there or that he may have liked someone in the past, but at the end of the day – who cares! I don’t know him. He’s not my friend. If he got married the next day (I would be damn shocked) it would not have any impact on my life at all (unlike politics…..sighhh, that’s a mess of its own.)
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takaraphoenix · 6 years
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I believe you didn't talk about your opinion of Riverdale's season 2 yet. (You know, in it's entirety and not just of some scenes.) But now I'm left curious. What do you think of the rest of the season? And since you wanted to find out on your own: Did you manage to correctly identify the Black Hood before it was confirmed in the show?
Oooh. Oh, sorry. I just always post the excitement when something, ya know, exciting happens. Still unsure about lengthy ramblings that seem too off-topic from the blog. (Yes, I am still pretending this blog has a theme. Let me. xD)
Oh dear, how do I put all the things into words and in order?
To sum it up briefly as an intro: I’m disappointed.
Now, more in detail.
Starting with the things I liked. Which are significantly less than the things I disliked, hence the overall verdict.
Toni is an amazing character and I love her addition to the show. I just hope she will get her own plotline next season, because this season she was only there to either further Jughead’s plot or Cheryl’s. I’m also very eager to see Toni’s and Cheryl’s relationship unfold, because boy do I ship it hard.
I really enjoyed FP and Alice Cooper’s development this season, much to my own surprise. Alice came out being one of my most hated characters first season, but I actually liked her semi-redemption arc and... I... somehow now ship her and FP? I am very disturbed by that, to be honest.
And... with that, we kind of reached the end of the things I enjoyed this season? Which, yeah, sad.
I didn’t like a single one of the main characters’ plotlines this season.
Archie and how his relationship with his father slowly came apart over the course of the season - despite it being semi-mended in the end, this whole arch seemed unnecessarily forced and in contrast to their portrayal in the first season.
Archie and starting his own fucking gang. TWICE.
Seriously. He gives Jughead shit for being a serpent, but then he goes ahead and starts his own gang. And the fucking names. Red Circle. Dark Circle. Wow. Such creativity, much awe.
Archie running after Hiram Lodge all season long was just... intensely disturbing to watch. He just allowed himself to be sucked in deeper and deeper.
So did Veronica and with her it annoyed me even more. First season Veronica seemed so much like the girl who was against her criminal father. And now she just... doubled down on the crime hard. And I genuinely don’t know what she was expecting? Because the girl acted like what happened was somehow a surprise or something in the end, when she turned against him again. Like. What... What did she think would happen...?
Then there was Betty’s plot.
I liked that she confided in Archie and her friends about the Black Hood and didn’t just do a solo gig. But her trying to get her brother and them just immediately accepting the creep into the family without so much as a fucking background check first.
And Jughead literally went from the sweet nerd with a blog to the fucking king of the gang. Like. Good lords, slow it down some. It seemed so incredibly rushed just how fast he came to accept the serpents as his family and the school as his home. I think that his “becoming a serpent and becoming king of the serpents” plot should have been stretched out over two seasons.
Cheryl’s plot was... so over the top too. Conversion camp? Her mom trying to murder grandma? And... her characterization was all over the place too. One second she is the Queen with the power-moves cutting her mom’s oxygen, the next she is the crying girl in the corner, weak and helpless. I mean, I get that with everything that happened last and this season to her, she wouldn’t be fully stable, but it really felt more like convenient writing. “Mh, we need more tension, so how about Cheryl is utterly helpless and defenseless in the next scene?” turning into “Oh but we could use a badass move, how about she just attacks the serial killer with her bow and arrows and without being the least bit intimidated?”.
Also Cheryl and Rose now living alone in the mansion... Honestly, instead of making her sick grandma her guardian, I think auntie Alice should have stepped up.
The relationship between Cheryl and Betty is really fascinating and I would genuinely enjoy seeing more of it. Like, having Cheryl move in with them, she can have Polly’s room. She would be forced to live a more down-to-Earth life.
The whole evil twin of her dad thing was really unnecessary. I mean. Seriously. It added absolutely nothing to the plot.
Just, overall, there was way too much going on this season for my taste.
And not just too much as in too many plotlines, also just... too dark, too deep, too heavy.
This show is indeed taking the Desperate Housewives route, but it hits it harder than I expected.
That is to say, the first season offers a genuinely intriguing, vaguely over-dramatic mystery that happens and that brings an unlikely band of protagonists together to solve it. Following seasons will so desperately try to top it that the dramatic event is completely blown out of proportions and loses absolutely all grasp on reality.
And that’s what happened this season.
We get a serial killer. And the mafia. And a psycho imposter brother. And an evil twin. And a conversion camp. And a gang war. And a serial rapist. And a drug problem.
That’s just too many “and”s.
First season worked perfectly. It had that one mystery that they had to solve and then some sub-plots around it. That mystery was one murder.
Now, to your other question regarding the Black Hood: HONESTLY HALF THE TIME I FORGET THAT HE IS A CHARACTER ON THIS SHOW.
Hal is so bland and so unimportant. When he made his first appearance this season, I legit went “OH right Alice has a husband! Ooops!”.
I figured it out at one point, but then they went misdirection with that second, or third, I lost count, Black Hood and I grew doubtful because why the fuck.
Last season, with daddy Blossom, it took me really long to figure it out. But when it was revealed, it was a thing that made sense. They set the mystery up so you had to work to figure it out, but it made sense plotwise.
This one? They purposefully wrote it so it doesn’t make sense.
There is no legit motive. They retconned some “Oh by the way his dad was a murderer but he pinned it on someone else and momma brainwashed him and Betty’s words in the last season finale were a trigger to turn him into a serial killer” so hard that it’s just pathetic.
And how he conveniently managed to stop killing when he got it pinned on someone else. That was literally only plot-convenience to make the viewer believe they got the right guy, because Hal had no logical motivation to stop killing. It was never about hiding his crimes? He literally wrote letters and made phone-calls and flaunted it in everybody’s face, why would he find a scapegoat and then stop killing? That’s just... bullshit. He should have, logically speaking, gone after like Hiram Lodge or some other scumbag criminal.
Nothing about that shit could have been guessed.
I mean, I did guess that Hal would be the son of the murderer. Or the one surviving child from the murder. But then they put the janitor in and killed that.
Last season’s mystery came natural. This one was forced in every way of the word.
That just completely took the fun out of it for me.
Well, that and the sheer amount of cruelty and brutality this season. There was no fun this season. Last season still had its lighthearted moments. This one didn’t.
It’s not just taking a bad Desperate Housewives route, that route is crossing streets with the bad Teen Wolf route of going grittier and darker and removing all color and fun from something that used to have color and fun and then somehow expecting that to be good. It is not. It never will be.
Either make something gritty and dark from the get-go so it attracts the right crowd of people, or make something that has jokes and lightheartedness in it and embrace that. But don’t attempt a genre-change like that. It’s a failure.
The musical episode was really out of place for me too. It didn’t fit to the tone of this season at all. Fun musical stuff could have gone with last season. Not to mention the musical could have been Kevin’s plotline. But... Kevin kind of didn’t get a plotline at all. He got one episode of musical thrown his way and that vague shit about him fucking in the woods and that was, essentially, it.
I am also not a hundred percent sure; did Betty and Jughead actually fuck or just make out...? I usually look away when they start undressing on screen and only look up again when the scene is over. I fail to see any reason for sex scenes at all, period, in literally any show, but especially so in a show about supposed teenagers? It’s just... weird for me. But if they did, fuck you show. I want asexual Jughead. Also, this ship has zero chemistry.
And can someone maybe get Betty a therapist now? Last season with her turning into psycho Betty with the fucking wig was already Really Disturbing, but she doubled down on that hard this season? And? Is she supposed to have some form of... personality disorder? Is that intentional? Either way, she helped cover up a murder this season and got psychologically tortured by her father who is a serial killer, so yeah please get her professional help.
So, yeah. That’s it.
I found this season too forced, too dark and too brutal and if the show doubles down on those elements with the same rate that it did from season 1 to season 2, then season 3 is going to be DCEU levels of dark and gritty.
I really hope they will slow down and that they will start remembering that you don’t have to rush from one traumatic, brutal event to the next murder to the next attempted rape and so on, but that you can... pause in between and put something more light in, to even things out. How do writers keep forgetting that...?
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