#im developing a rash from the word lover

[daedalusdavinci]

7 w/ solkat?

7. Unflinchingly settling your head into your lover’s lap while they watch television/are reading a book/doing their favorite hobby. Then asking your lover to explain what’s going on/what they’re doing. i wrote this stream of consciousness and i dont feel like editing it so you get what you get

The nice thing about Karkat is that he's always good for background noise. Whenever you need something else to drown out the voices, he's always there, ranting and raving about some inane bullshit you couldn't care less about, but enjoy hearing regardless. It's an odd day when you can't hear him puttering around the house and mumbling under his breath, cursing out a chair you didn't push in that he tripped over or the food that isn't cooking fast enough. The cat Dave convinced you (convinced Karkat, just by virtue of forcing Karkat to hold it for more than five minutes until all the ice around Karkat's heart melted) to take in is just as loud as he is, and at all hours of the day, you can hear them talking to each other, Karkat's grumble interspersed with the cat's loud meows.

He's quiet today, though. Rose left him with a new book the other day, and apparently today is the day he has the attention span to devour it. You're treated to an uncharacteristic silence as you work, and for a while, it's sort of nice. Until it isn't.

You give up on coding when it feels like there are bugs crawling under your skin, irritation at a boiling point. The code isn't making sense, you can't concentrate, and the screams of the imminently doomed are no longer background, piercing howls destroying any coherent thought you might have left. Your wrists are sore, your neck hurts, your head is throbbing, you're stiff and your eyes are dry and you can't remember the last time you ate. You're done.

Sparks jump from your fingertips as you shove your chair back and ditch your computer. There's a buzzing in your ears that's probably you, but you're too irritable to care as you stalk down the hall to the kitchen. Nothing sounds good, but you know you need to eat if you want to push through this, so you tug open cupboards and force yourself to consider the food anyway.

The cat (Dave wanted to name it Carcinisation; you wanted to name it Hexadecimal. In the end, you compromised on Hexbug, because Karkat said there was no way Dave was naming it after him, Rose liked the nickname Hex, and Dave liked the callback to a human toy you've never heard of) starts meowing at you immediately, trailing a few paces behind you like a starving stray, when you're 100% sure Karkat has been feeding him all his little heart desires. He's as obnoxious and needy as the human who brought him here, and you ignore him, because he's being dramatic and you're so charged up you think you'd shock him if you even tried to pet him. (You do drop him a few treats, because you feel bad.)

In the end, you heat up leftovers. The smell of warm orange chicken makes your stomach perk up a little, and as you eat a few pieces on the way to the couch, you feel a little less like blowing your apartment off the map.

Karkat, predictably, has tucked himself into his favorite corner of the couch with a blanket and the new book. Hex runs past you to jump up on the arm of the couch and complain about your abuse, and without looking up, Karkat lifts a hand to scratch Hex's little, whining head. Because you are the superior lifeform, you flop down on Karkat's other side and bravely resist the urge to complain about Hex framing you.

Karkat looks up for you, though. He blinks the way he does when he's been reading too long, like his eyes are refocusing like a camera lens, and he can't quite see what's in front of him right away. "You look like shit," is the first thing he says.

"Wow, thanks." Despite yourself, you feel your grouchiness crack a little. It probably helps that you're eating now, but there's just something about Karkat, too.

His fingers brush through your hair, like swiping away the static. "You're sparking."

"You don't say."

"Sometimes you don't notice." He's right. He stretches his legs out, unfurling, and his knee pushes into yours. "How's your head?"

"Hurting."

He hums. You don't give him much to work with, and he watches you for a while, thinking. His fingers fiddle absently with the hair at the nape of your neck, arm propped against the back of the couch. His presence makes you feel a little bit more grounded, and so you eat and try to focus on that. Eventually, his eyes drift back to his book.

By the time you finish eating, it stops feeling like enough. You feel less shaky and irritable, but your head is pounding with the force of screams, and you need something else. You push your empty bowl back on the coffee table and twist, dropping sideways across the couch with your head in Karkat's lap. He has to lift his book to accommodate you, but he doesn't protest for a second, seemingly expecting it. His nails drag soothingly along your scalp, and your eyes shut instantly, a wave of relief rolling over you. This is what you needed. Definitely.

Hexbug weaves between you like an asshole, determined to fit himself in the middle of the action. He plops down in the middle of your chest like a big, furry sack of shit, squirming into you to get comfortable until you start petting him. He goes loose instantly, purring quietly at first, and then loudly, the vibration of it rattling your very bones. It feels like it shakes the pain out of you, some inexplicable healing power stored in the rumble of your adorabeast. "He's louder than you," you tell Karkat.

"Tell me something new," Karkat mutters, absentminded.

"What are you reading?"

"Are you asking because you care, or because you want to rag on my taste?"

"Legally, I'm obligated to say the latter, but you know it's both."

Karkat sighs. And then, he talks. And he keeps talking. And the voices fade a little further into the back of your mind, and you relax.

[killerfund]

‘ WE SHOULD DO THIS MORE OFTEN ’   -  welcome to a character from  KNIVES OUT ( ransom hugh drysdale ) .  Here you will find not only an immense switch up of an alternative sequel/ending to what was portrayed in the movie, this will have its own adaptation and developed headcanons.  INDEPENDENT MEDIUM ACTIVITY  /  MOVIE BASED. MUTUALS ONLY.  \   read by rin  25+ est zone. pronouns: she/her/they.   [ RULES UNDERCUT ] 

        .    memes     .     promo    .

this will be an 18+ audience, this is for my own comfort and for what could or possibly be displayed. ransom is not a kind one, he is rash and temperament is unidentifiable. there will be harsh approaches and even to the extent of which he is foul in his actions or words.       

mutuals / are always welcome to send and reply to asks sent. there is no limit to how many and surely never an expiration to memes being posted. if you see one or think of sending one, do it! this is the greatest way to grab my attention and quickest. sometimes if i sit on them for too long, i do tend to erase and start fresh, please don’t feel discouraged if this does happen or i don’t get around to it. 

following / will be limited since i have other blogs to manage. if you do, i highly recommend to send in memes or message me if interested. unfollowing would only occur if inactive, hiatus or any sorts to which does not follow the conduct of keeping the dash safe for everyone. 

shipping / i don’t really have any limit only to make it make sense. though, 18+ audience only. nsfw is rare but could be presented in a post or edit. im a jump on board kind of crew/partner. if you have a plot and want to share for them to be enemies to lover, childhood sweethearts, i;m down to plotting and making our ship sail. I do only ask, no repeats of relationship, I don’t like to recycle already done au’s. unless its been a long time since rped. this is because i don’t want to feel like repeating a said story and just bored of it. 

triggers / no racism, colorism, anti-lgbtq+, anon-hate etc of anything. please, this a community and everyone is welcome, just not nasty attitudes or being hateful against others.  as for posts to be tagged accordingly as normal. ex  ( label tw )  

overall /  no godmodding, no anon hate. don’t insert me in drama, etc etc. if it concerns someone i follow, please message me directly. anything on anon will not be addressed. I would like to be confronted, personally and not hidden so i can understand the situation ( if any ) or to rather, be taken seriously.

more to be added as everything is still fresh here. but thank you for reading. this is for fun, not a job i log into. I have a kid and a household to take care of and sometimes after a long day, i tend to catch up on sleep or need away time. :D but im always available on IM’s and best way is discord ( by request only ) 

[mikabee]

Omg I found my "meta" on Mary way before S4. The question was posted on some sherlock community outside tumblr. Is Mary really evil? I personally don't believe in terms like "evil" or "good" beause nobody's completely one or the other. And i can't say im 100% sure on what's the deal on Mary. But i do believe we don't know all there is yet, and I have a feeling she is a high-functioning sociopath. Yep, what Sherlock claims to be, but is not (a whole another topic). Why? Let's analyse the symptoms. • Compulsive lying- "As part of their facade ((facade? remind you of anyone?)) sociopaths are compulsive liars and will rarely speak truthfully, making them hard to pin down." Mary has lied about her family, her being an assasin, even her real name. Oh, but its just about her background, its one big lie and not compulsive lying? Even before Sherlock found out all that, the first time he was making deductions and they were flooding the screen fast, if you paused, the word "Liar" was already there. Most probably because he knew she had been lying to John about liking his moustache. A small lie, but Sherlock took note of it, because people who find it easy to lie most likely do it a lot. Also, if Sherlock was right about Mary befriending Janine for Magnussen (even so close to ask her to be her bridesmaid), it would have needed quite a bit of lying. • Lack of empathy- "Inability to feel sympathy for others or to understand the emotional consequences of their actions" Now, we can't really know if she is faking sympathy or not. But when John found out about her lies, she wasn't sympathetic of him, she only thought about her losing him. She didn't care about how John felt. • Charming, charismatic- "While the sociopath is unable to fully understand the emotions of others, they are capabe, but rather highly adept at mimicking them and might appear to be charming and normal at first" A lot of people loved Mary when she first appeared on the series, even those who thought they wouldn't, and so did John- she truly was charming. But in ep3 we found out, it was just a facade, the real Mary was far from charming and normal. • High IQ- I don't even need to say much on this one. Not just anyone can be a secret intelligence agent. • Narcissism- One of her first lines in the show was "I agree, im the best thing that could have happened to you." Now, I loved that line at first (though it was there after John stuttered and probably thought that the best thing would've been Sherlock), and I love female characters who are confident like that, as they're rare nowadays. But is it just confidence or already narcissism...? • Manipulative- "Sociopaths use their superficial charm and high IQ to manipulate others to get their ends" Staging a death to flee her country of origin, taking up a new identity, manipulating Janine.. • Cold, calculating nature- "The ability and willingness to use others around them to personal gain" Very similar to previous point. In Watsons have a Domestic, and when shooting Sherlock, and when hugging John after Sherlock had woken up, she seemed really cold and calculating to me... • Paranoid- "Often their lack of understanding of emotion along with their incongruos self view means that they feel a lack of trust and paranoia." Not much for this one, but she is extremely paranoid for John to find out her past and to lose him. Maybe its just love, but she certainly doesn't trust him, knowing John, he'd possibly forgive Mary much faster if he didn't find it out from her shooting his best friend. Its certainly doesn't sound like a healthy relationship to me. • Shifting the blame - Nop it was tootally not Mary's fault for lying to John the entire time, it was his, he's the one who chose her, "it's what you like" she's totally innocent...not. • Secretive- She shoots her husbands best friend, just to keep secrets from her past. It has always puzzled me, why shoot him as "surgery"(HE DIEDD but lets pretend), when she most probably knows that wouldn't keep Sherlock from telling John, plus he offered help- she could've worked with him, and then she'd get to actually shoot Magnussen that time. • Impulsive behavior - "A lack of regret and empathy makes sociopaths more likely to make sudden rash decisions based on the current facts." Again, shooting Sherlock when there were many other ways out of that situation. And im pretty sure she didn't feel regret or empathy for shooting him, pointing a gun at "him" again in Leicester gardens. • Shallow emotion- "Lack of real emotion in response to events, limited capacity to feel love" This one's tricky, because i have conflicting scenes of her in emotional moments. In Watsons have a Domestic she seems very unattached from the conflict to me. No outbursts of emotion, John and Sherlock are more like the ones having the domestic tbh- she just seems unaffected and...calculating. And she never apoligized. Not once. After months of not talking to John she doesn't seem even a bit remorseful, saying in a mocking manner "Oh, are we doing conversation today?". And then, when John throws the flashdrive in the fire, she cries and seems to be very emotional. So i have no idea. Symptoms I couldn't point to Mary (some because of insufficient information): • Sexually deviant • Sensitive to criticism • Authoritarian • Low tolerance for boredom • "Triad of sociopathy" - traits that often are demonstrated in sociopaths from a young age. Include animal cruelty ((she's a cat lover so not likely)), bed wetting and pyromania ((we don't know her childhood)). (((note added post-s4: pyromania, Eurus much))) Am I saying all sociopaths are "evil"? No. If Mary really is not faking any emotions, if her looking cold and never apoligizing to John is just from shock or idk what, if she shoots her husbands best friend just because she loves him a lot and would never want to hurt him just for her own secret...except thats what she does...but if all that is just her being in love, that's a horrible kind of love. But if she is a sociopath, and has been acting all along, faking her love- or at least faking that its healthy, not obsessive like sociopaths and psychopaths can have- then her actions would be classifiable as "evil" by most people. As i said, this is a whole other topic, but I don't think Sherlock is a sociopath like he claims. Sherlock was driven by selfless love (shooting Magnussen, even though it sends him away from John), not selfish one like Mary (shooting Sherlock, hurting John, just so she could stay close to him). And I think Mary is here for Sherlock to realise he is not one- he is not like her, he feels emotions. Just like Moriarty was there ,who i believe was a psychopath, to show the difference between him and Sherlock. Plus there's the theory Morstan is Moran... And Sherlock restarted his heart because he thought John is "definitely" in danger from Mary. When back alive, he does say to John she's trustworthy, but why was he so sure before she wasn't that he even literally came back to life because of that? (and the whole "surgery" thing baffles me, he WAS dead for a moment, doctors were even giving up on him, walking away, until yknow, power of love~~ But she couldn't have possiby foreseen THAT). In the end, I could be wrong about all of this. But I will still love Mary a lot as a character, as a villain, if she'll be a role to make Sherlock realize he isn't a sociopath, or if she's just a very flawed human being who made bad choices, and will hopefully have character development next season. ((post s4 note: lmao u wish past Mika, that "redemption" did nothing for me)) But since S4 is about consequences, I hope Mary pays for what she's done, but i also hope she doesn't just die, thats the easy way out, I want John to choose Sherlock over Mary on his own accord, not cause she dies. ((post s4 note: ha))

[luhvelight]

Hello! I hope your 2020 is the most amazing year thus far. I am CB, Cancer rising, Scorpio moon. I’m wondering how my 2020 will look like in terms of love. Thank you so much. 💫🌷🍃

Hello CB, thank you for your patience with this tarot reading. You recieved the reversed Eight of Wands, reversed Ten of Swords and reversed Four of Cups. Your cards messages are extremely versatile and could mean self-love or the love youll have platonically or romantically.

The Eight of Wands suggests that you may have been attempting to attract love in your life and your wishes havent been granted. However the Eight of Wands represents a situation where someone is hasty in their pursuits, unclear about their goals or how they will obtain them. You may not getting your wishes granted because you are confused on how to attract love or you maybe distracted by more demanding factors in your life. The Eight of Wands is urging you to think before you act, even though you may feel that this delay is making you only more frustrated. You might jumping from idea to idea, without really developing a clear way on how you are going to approach this situation. It is fantastic that you are willing to go after love (without waiting for it to come to you) but just remind yourself that some factors will be completely out of your control and love can be making its way to you, if you truly CLEAR your mind for it. Try to practice focus and connecting. Connect with yourself and give yourself the time to present in the moment. You owe it to yourself to be patient so that you can relax. The Eight of Wands also indicates that you may be resisting a change or trying to control a situation too much. In general, Im getting a strong indicator here that you maybe the kind of person who likes having control or being in charge (please correct me if im wrong). Once again, there is nothing wrong with that! Let go and surrender to the natural flow of life.

The Ten of Swords is also another indicator that you maybe trying to fight the inevitable change that will impact your life. Youre unsure if this change will be good or bad however, youll never know and youll lose yourself trying to figure out the answer. This may be why Im getting the message that you need to practice clarity and focus. You may be desperately wanting to attract love into your life but may be overwhelmed by other things going on. It is important that you close the door on this chapter (that is only causing you more harm) and make the room for your mind & heart to allow love. The Ten of Swords also indicates that this situation (that is still troubling you) had ended long ago but you are still harboring repressed feelings. The way the situation ended may be clouded your judgement and its possible your letting it rule the way you look at life. The Ten of Swords is here to remind you to not dwell because itll only cause you more pain and torment. You deserve peace and love, you deserve the world!

The Four of Cups is suggests giving yourself some time alone to reflect and check in with your inner self. The Four of Cups also tells me that you may even feel reluctant to be vulnerable or open yourself to the idea of someone. This could connect to what I said before about the Ten of Swords indicating that you may still be holding onto a past situation. Use this period of time to truly remind yourself of how beautiful, loving, special and deserving that you are.

Your love life in 2020 will revolve around if you are capable of moving on from people who have hurt you and learning to trust a new lover once again. This could also mean how you will begin to trust and connect with yourself too! Since Im also getting a strong theme of “focus”, I also get the message that you will figure out what you want out of a relationship. Youll figure out your “type” and what an adoring & healthy relationship even looks like to you. I kept getting the word “niave” pop into my head a few times while writing this message. I think it ultimately comes from the Eight of Wands message reminding you not to make rash decisions. In 2020 really look out for yourself in terms of love and let people know that you have boundaries. Dont let anyone take advantage of you and protect yourself against energy drainers.