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deripmaver · 3 years

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laurent is a good person - book 1 meta

one of the most amazing things about captive prince is how the reveals in book 3 recontextualize all of the scenes leading up to them, including about laurent himself. in book one, all we see is damen pov as he’s being abused and humiliated by this supposedly spoiled, vile ice prince. when the regent comes to damen and subtly (and not so subtly) insults laurent, calling him unfit to rule - well, why would he think anything different? laurent has insulted him, had him whipped within an inch of his life, and even attempted to (and later successfully lmfao) have him raped while drugged out of his mind.

after book 3 we can reread most if not all of book 1 as a very traumatized boy who has finally been confronted with the man who killed his brother, leaving him alone with his abusive uncle, and who he clearly has made into a complete monster in his own mind. damen of course sees him as a complete bitch, but there’s textual/subtextual evidence that laurent is well liked, and that his behavior during book 1 was actually pretty out of character for him. i’d like to provide some examples of that now!!!!

“Laurent had stopped dead the moment he had seen Damen, his face turning white as though in reaction to a slap, or an insult. Damen’s view, half-truncated by the short chain at this neck, had been enough to see that. But Laurent’s expression had shuttered quickly.” Captive Prince, Chapter One

i couldn’t resist adding this one in hehe. laurent recognizes damen!! he’s come down, knowing his uncle has devised another truly horrendous and triggering “gift” and that he’ll lose support if he calls it our for what it truly is, only to find out that it’s fucking damianos of akielos sent to him as a sex slave. a jab at laurent’s trauma about auguste and also a jab at laurent’s frigid sexuality - which ofc is completely the regent’s fault. fuck that guy so much lmfao

“‘It’s so rare to see you at these entertainments, Your Highness,’ said Vannes.” Captive Prince, Chapter Two.

this is right before the fight between govart and damen in the ring, of course. damen sees laurent as depraved and vile as the sexual sadism on display by the veretian court, and considers him to be a willing purveyor of it. this is wrong, of course, as said by vannes here. laurent has only shown up because he wants to humiliate damen lmfao.

“He did remember being supported by two of the guards, here, in this room, while Radel stared athis back in horror. ‘The Prince really . . . did this.’ ‘Who else?’ Damen said. Radel had stepped forward, and slapped Damen across the face; it was a hard slap, and the man wore three rings on each finger. ‘What did you do to him?’ Radel demanded.” Captive Prince, Chapter Four

this scene, to me, was the most telling lmfao. it’s right after damen is whipped. you could argue that radel is just a servant in the employ of the royal household, so is of course going to be loyal to the prince, but he seems genuinely surprised of the prince’s cruelty towards damen. not only that, but he slaps him and immediately assumes damen must have done something. which - i mean, technically he did lmao. not necessarily enough to deserve having the skin flayed from his back, but you know. if laurent was in the habit of torturing pets and slaves, why would the overseer react this way?

“The men guarding him were the Prince’s Guard, and had no affiliation with the Regent whatsoever. It surprised Damen how loyal they were to their Prince, and how diligent in his service, airing none of the grudges and complaints that he might have expected, considering Laurent’s noxious personality. Laurent’s feud with his uncle they took up wholeheartedly; there were deep schisms and rivalries between the Prince’s Guard and the Regent’s Guard, apparently.” Captive Prince, Chapter Four

laurents relationships with his guards are also some of the biggest indicators that he isn’t just a spoiled brat, but can insire a deep loyalty in his men. even if they do all want to fuck him. ah, sexual harassment. it’s also hilarious that damen immediately assumes they’re loyal to him because they want to fuck him - nice projection there, dude. we know a bit more about laurent and his guards thanks to green but for a season, but this little bit here is interesting.

“Laurent was indeed good at talking. He accepted sympathy gracefully. He put his position rationally. He stopped the flow of talk when it became dangerously critical of his uncle. He said nothing that could be taken as an open slight on the Regency. Yet no one who talked to him could have any doubt that his uncle was behaving at best misguidedly and at worst treasonously.” Captive Prince, Chapter Five

idek what to say here. laurent my beloved <3333

“‘When someone doesn’t like you very much, it isn’t a good idea to let them know that you care about something,’ said Laurent. Damen felt himself turn ashen, as the threat sank in. ‘Would it hurt worse than a lashing for me to cut down someone you care for?’ said Laurent.” Captive Prince, Chapter Seven

this isn’t really relevant to my thesis lmfao i just love this exchange bc it gives SO MUCH information about laurent and his uncle in just three lines of dialogue. what has the regent done, who did he cut down just to hurt laurent? when and how did laurent learn that? p a i n

“Laurent’s fussy horse began acting out again, and he leaned forward in the saddle, murmuring something as he stroked her neck in an uncharacteristically gentle gesture to quiet her.” Captive Prince, Chapter Nine.

HORSEY NO- lmfao this scene just hurts so badly on the reread. especially later on, in book 3 i think, where laurent says something like “i provoked my uncle.” he’s really blaming himself for his uncle KILLING HIS HORSE, his horse that his murdered brother trained, one of the only living connections to auguste... all because his uncle could not let a single miniscule plan laurent had set go through without some kind of repercussion. literally all laurent did was do something to stop an innocent group of people from being abused, nothing to undermine his uncle’s rule, but because the regent is VILE he could not let laurent have even this. he’s so good with her, too. he must have known by this point and also known that there was no way to stop this. P A I N

“‘I know that you have somehow arranged this,’ said Erasmus. He was incapable of hiding what he felt, and just seemed to radiate embarrassed happiness. ‘You kept your promise. You and your master. I told you he was kind,’ Erasmus said. ‘You did,’ said Damen. He was pleased to see Erasmus happy. Whatever Erasmus believed about Laurent, Damen wasn’t going to dissuade him. ‘He’s even nicer in person. Did you know he came and talked to me?’ said Erasmus. ‘—He did?’ said Damen. It was something he couldn’t imagine. ‘He asked about . . . what happened in the gardens. Then he warned me. About last night.’ ‘He warned you,’ said Damen. ‘He said that Nicaise would make me perform before the court and it would be awful, but that if I was brave, something good might come at the end of it.’ Erasmus looked up at Damen curiously. ‘Why do you look surprised?’ ‘I don’t know. I shouldn’t be. He likes to plan things in advance,’ said Damen.” Captive Prince, Chapter 9.

this is the first in-text confirmation we have that laurent has a good heart beneath his layers and layers of trauma-induced lashing out. book one often skeeves people out because of its graphic and, honestly, yes, kind of sexualized depiction of rape, slavery, and depravity, but beneath it all you meet these two protagonists who are going to have all of their most deeply held views about each other challenged. laurent from very early on is shaken to his core when damen refuses to rape nicaise in the ring - it cracks the very foundations of the person he’d built up in his head as this horrible monster who killed his brother in cold blood. and damen keeps defying laurents expectations by being a good person through and through. on the other hand, laurent spends the first part of the book taking out years of anger on damen, but here for the first time we see him do something just because its the kind thing to do. yes, torveld is an ally against his uncle, but laurent has clearly been scheming with him for a while now, and he’s now overlooking his hatred of damen and working with him just because none of the slaves deserve whats happened to them. it’s such a sweet moment.

“One of the other men, eyeing them, approached a moment later. ‘Don’t mind Jean. He’s in a foul mood. He was the one had to stick a sword through the mare’s throat and put her down. The Prince tore strips off him for not doing it fast enough.’” Captive Prince, Chapter Nine.

HORSEY NO- pt 2. this is just another really sweet and sad detail - laurent being so upset that the horse’s death could have been more painless. it must have hurt so much to see her in pain, and to know that the only way for that pain to end was being put down as quickly as possible. i wuv him. im sad

that’s it, though there are still a few more chapters left in the book. this isn’t providing any new information, of course, the path of the three books is to show that laurent isnt the man we meet in book one, that he’s actually sweet, and earnest, and he’s been fighting his own battle practically alone against his abuser since he was fifteen years old. also, the reveal that laurent knew who damianos was from the start makes it clear imo that all of his violence in book 1 was supposed vengence, not... him being evil. he apologizes explicitly in-text, and also, all of the acts of violence he commits cause serious problems for him in terms of his future alliance which he then needs to fix. i just love how layered these books are, how there’s so much information in them that makes rereading almost more fun than reading them for the very first time!

#Captive Prince #captive prince meta #damen x laurent #Laurent of Vere #Damianos of Akielos

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memoriashell · 4 years

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seashells and shores ( and something a bit more )

Characters / Pairing: Fukawa Touko / Naegi Komaru, ensemble class 78; varyingly background / implied ships are sakuraoi / ishimondo / celeschi / naeleogami

crossposted on ao3

Notes: a very late day 3 for @tokomaruweek. beach prompt! yesterday i was feeling a little burnt out so i decided to not write since i didn’t want to put out something half assed. hopefully this being a bit longer helps make up for it! ( and by a bit, i mean i basically doubled the word count compared to what i’ve done for this week so far lmao rip so much for hoping i’d catch up tonight )

rated t for touko's trauma. and also for junko having her tits out. thanks junko.

anyways tw for like trauma, the general self-depricating / self-concious stuff for toko but also like. her trauma w/ water is brought up since it's. beach? and also drowning doesn't actually happen but it is brought up. and touko mentions claustrophobia in relation to her trauma offhandedly once, and again, just generally feeling insecure.

also it's kinda implied that chihiro and celes are both trans thank you!!!

Summary: going to the beach isn't exactly an exciting thought for her, given the fact she has no desire getting in the water.

komaru seems dead set on making sure she makes some memories anyways.

Do you want to come to the beach with us? That is the first text of the morning that she receives, courtesy of Makoto Naegi. Touko considers asking who he means by us, gathers that he probably means some assortment of their classmates, and ( while it is very tempting to say yes ) concludes that she can safely say no. And she intends to do exactly that, but she gets a set of texts that stops her from being able to do so.

touko-chan!!!!

ur coming with us, right?

you should come with us!

itll be fun!

So Komaru would be there too— their...friendship is odd, all things considered. Not that the knowledge of knowing she’d be there makes the offer any more tempting, but she bites her lip and considers what to say. Not that there’s really much of a question, just keep it blunt and to the point as per usual. No point in sugar coating things.

I’m busy. Maybe next time. She’s not that busy, current manuscript aside. Not that Touko intended on ever not being busy. It’s not her fault that Komaru is too dense to take a hint.

awww :(

pls?

if u don’t wanna get in the water, ill make sure they’ll leave you alone. im sure you won’t be the only one that doesnt want to!!

Ah. She might have to ( partially ) retract her statement on Komaru being dense. Had she figured out her reluctance without her even mentioning it, or had that just been a lucky guess? Maybe it was just Makoto’s luck rubbing off on her...

i understand if you don’t want to come

and i’ll leave u alone if u rlly dont wanna come.

but it wont be as much fun without you there :(

Urgh. Yeah, this girl doesn’t understand a thing, does she? She’s probably not even realized the impact her words have on her. Touko grumbles under her breath, but figures she should respond before Komaru sends another text begging trying to convince her.

Fine.

I’m not going in the water, though.

If this goes horribly wrong, I’m blaming you.

That is a lie. Even if worst comes to worst and Syo feels the need to front for her, she won’t hold it against her. She’s the one who agreed, after all. It’s just one last attempt at offering her an out. To change her mind. Like she should. But Komaru is nothing if not stubborn, so she doesn’t really expect that offer to be taken up on. She starts making a mental checklist of what she probably needs to take with her, doesn’t get very far into that list because Komaru’s response is nearly instantaneous.

yayayayay tnk u touko-chan ily!!!!!! :D

we’ll pick u up k????

ur staying @ the place near the dorms right? see u soon!! ♡♡

Touko grimaces at the butchering of language that is Komaru’s texting ( and ignores her own fluttering heart upon seeing the casual hearts sprinkled in at the end ), and sends back, If you love me, fix your grammar.

The car ride over is mostly uneventful. In that she means she feels like she’s going to have a headache before they even get there and Makoto keeps giving her a sympathetic look. In other words, she’s learned that Komaru and both Asahina siblings should not be left to entertain themselves for the hour-long car ride, but the only silver lining here is that it was only an hour-long ride and hopefully they would be tired out for the ride back.

The highlight of the hour was that even if it’d been a tight squeeze in the backseat, that meant she’d been ( somewhat ) uncomfortably sandwiched between the door and Komaru herself. She’s a little surprised that it doesn’t set off her claustrophobia, but reckons that might just be because it’s too bright to remind her of being locked in a closet. And also because Komaru is generally distracting in close proximity, from the way she’d been halfway sitting on her lap, to the faint scent of what Touko figures to be her shampoo.

She also considers it a victory that she did not dissociate in the midst of that, but probably only because Komaru kept checking on her and apologizing for how close they are: she’d had to bite her tongue several times from saying something harsher than she’d really mean. She doesn't hate Syo, but probably counterintuitive to let them front today: whether they are aware of this, or simply just disinterested in trying to front right now, she is thankful. If nothing else, she would consider this some kind of learning moment. Maybe. Something to draw inspiration from?

Still, once she’s free from the confines of the car, she can actually relax a little— or does for all of two seconds before Komaru has grabbed onto her free hand and started dragging her towards the loud group that she recognizes as her class. Yuta and Aoi had bolted out of the car the moment they’d come to a stop to race to the waters ( she can’t imagine being that athletic and feels tired watching them ). Touko gazes back longingly at the confines of the car and the consideration that she might’ve been able to isolate herself there, but her grip’s pretty tight on her hand. Which is nice, and distracts her from thinking about escaping until it's way too late, and she’s forced to look at the group before her, and—

Slaps a hand over Komaru’s eyes with a groan. “Enoshima, wh-what the fuck, you—” She holds off on the ( derogatory ) word she wants to say, and just scowls at the sight before her. “This isn’t a...a nude beach? Are you t-t-trying to get us in trouble or something?” Granted she’s not technically completely nude, but also more revealing than she should be. Seriously, she would’ve figured that Ishimaru would’ve already told Enoshima off already because what else is he good for ( then again, he is single-handedly the only person who would probably take no real issue with it, or be naively convinced by her that it wasn’t really a problem, so maybe she really shouldn’t be that surprised ).

Enoshima cackles at her. “Don’t be a prude, Fukawa! Or are you jealous? I’m just trying to get a sick tan.” While she’s at it, where the hell is Ikusaba to keep her sister in check? Whatever, that’s not really important, and she refuses to dignify that with a response given that Enoshima probably only wants to get a rise out of her.

Instead, she makes sure to put a decent distance between them before removing her hand from over Komaru’s eyes with a huff. “Urgh, honestly...what on earth m-made her think that was a, a good idea?” She grumbles, glancing around now that she doesn’t have to stare directly at...that.

Actually, now that she looks around, the only seemingly responsible person from their class currently present was Oogami— and honestly, she seems too busy being in love with her girlfriend to count ( if it wasn’t kind of heartwarming, she’d probably be disgusted. Not in a homophobic way, in a general ew PDA sort of way ). As for any else viably responsible: Kirigiri being absent wasn’t a surprise, Fujisaki’s too soft to really keep people in check, Byakuya is...his own entirely separate category, and she would rather die than count Hagakure as responsible in any capacity. And Makoto might be a voice of reason, but she’s pretty sure he’s utterly useless here. Which is probably a horrible sign of things to come, but what else did she expect from anything involving her peers?

“You don’t want to go in the water, right?” Komaru’s voice cuts in through her thoughts, watching her closely before taking her hand to start pulling her along then. “We should set up somewhere to sit, then!”

We? She thinks, but instead attempts to free her hand from her grip and voices, “...Don’t you want to go in th-the water with the rest of them? You don’t have to, uh, to stay with me, you know. I’m not a k-k-kid.”

Her expression looks conflicted. “Well, yeah, of course I do want to! But only for a bit, probably? I mean, it’d be kind of rude to leave you alone since I asked you to come?”

She ignores the way her stomach twists at that, and purses her lips. “Technically s-speaking, Makoto asked first. You aren’t— it’s not rude of you to want...to want to have some fun without me. I know I’m n-n-not fun to stick around.” She knows she wouldn’t want to stick around herself if she had the choice. “It’s not like, like I wasn’t prepared for th-that.”

“Yeah, but— that’s the thing. You shouldn’t be! And I want to spend time with everyone, and that includes you too.” And now she’s sulking. God. Fukawa is about to growl back something she’ll probably regret saying, but is saved from doing so by a much calmer voice interrupting, having overheard their argument.

“Why don’t you go join your brother for a bit? Fukawa-san can join us if she would like to. We have an extra seat.”

Celes looks hot— and she means that in a very literal sense ( mostly ), decked out in one of her usual frilly black dresses. She looks out of place in the hot summer heat. Touko is also not sure where and how she managed to get a table out here ( and tea, apparently, and you know what she’s just not going to question it ), but Fujisaki is already pulling out the extra seat in offering, and she sighs reluctantly. Better this than feeling like she’s holding Komaru back.

“G-G-Go. Or...or I’ll let Syo toss you in the water.” Not really a threat - if anything, Syo would dive bomb into the water with her. Argh, maybe she should’ve just let them front today...

( No, no she shouldn’t have. The only person currently present that Syo would’ve mostly listened to would be Komaru— and maybe Makoto or Fujisaki if they were feeling generous— which is an entirely different set of issues she doesn’t want to linger on. Needless to say, she doesn’t particularly want Syo to cause chaos today )

Touko is saved from having to argue further with her on this because as Komaru opens her mouth to protest, Yuta comes to steal her away, blabbering on about something about a game they should play: and while he’s definitely as oblivious as his sister, she’ll consider that a good thing, just this once. The only words Komaru manages to get in is to ask Toko to keep her bag for her, which she would’ve done anyways, picking it up from where she’d dropped it. She watches them wander off ( and only looks away when Komaru starts discarding the clothes she’d been wearing over her swimsuit ) before trudging over to sit next to Fujisaki, who flashes her a small smile as she types away on her laptop.

“I am surprised you came, Fukawa-san. You do not seem like the type for these activities. You are usually quite disinterested in participating in these kinds of things, in fact. Did something change?” Ugh. This is why Touko hates being around Ludenberg. Because she’s observant, generally only bested by Kirigiri in that regard, and is generally good at picking people apart when it comes to lies and acts and fronts ( though Touko would argue this is from personal experience, and not from being a gambler ). And this fact would have irritated her, quite honestly, if she had not self-sabatoged herself by taking it as an insult, instead.

“I-I-I get it. No one really wants...wants me here. That’s what you meant, right...? You don’t have to r-remind me.” She grits her teeth. If nothing else, when she isn’t busy lying, Touko can appreciate her honesty. The tiny hand that wraps around her wrist stops her from saying anything further, even if it doesn’t take much to wrench her arm out of Fujisaki’s grasp: but she gets the feeling she is only able to do so because she isn’t actually trying to hold on too tightly.

“I’m sure th-that’s not what she meant, Fukawa-san...” Ever quick to play peacekeeper, she supposes. Touko simply grumbles at her and rolls her eyes. “...Especially since not everyone was available today, it’s nice that you were able to join us!”

“Yes, it is a shame. I would have liked for Yamada-kun to have been able to help with my tea, today.” Celes sighs as if disappointed— really? That’s what she’s on about?

Touko does a second look at who is not currently gathered, and denotes, “Is Maizono st-still out on tour...?” She thinks Komaru had mentioned something like that in passing.

“Yes! Maizono-san is on tour, Yamada-kun is at an important convention, Ikusaba-san, she’s...doing some kind of training...? I think Kirigiri-san is supposed to be on the tail end of a rough case, and...” Here Fujisaki pauses to giggle into her hand. “I sh-shouldn’t really laugh at this really, but Ishimaru-kun got sick. Oowada-kun had to force him to rest since he had been trying to work through it and made it worse for himself... or so that’s what I was told.”

Oh, so that’s the reason she hasn’t heard the loudmouths today? She might take back her sentiments on Ishimaru being useless, but he’s on thin fucking ice. Of course the overachiever would get sick during the summer holidays— apparently, she’s not alone in that thought.

“Only Ishimaru-kun would get sick during vacation and still manage to find a reason to not take a break.” Celes rolls her eyes, but Touko gets the feeling she’s amused too.

“So wh-what you’re saying is, uh, is that Oowada’s going to get sick next...right? I guess— we’ll find out if idiots get s-s-sick or not.” Touko quips— which earns a softer laugh from Fujisaki, so that’s pretty good.

Of course, it wouldn’t be like her if she didn’t put her foot in her mouth almost immediately afterwards by asking why they aren’t going in the water: she’s not really surprised because Celes rarely participates in gym ( and coming from Touko that says a lot ), but she was pretty sure Fujisaki wasn’t that self-conscious of herself. Not as much? Not that she really has any place to talk in that regard.

“Well, we already went to the beach at the start of the summer holidays! I’m not really missing out on anything, and it’s probably not my last opportunity to go during this break anyways.” And then, a little more sheepishly. “...Also I’m close to making a breakthrough on this code, I think. I wanted the fresh air, but I don’t really think I can afford to take much of a break right now.”

“She would have stayed on the train if I did not warn her we were approaching our stop, I believe. And not all of us can be like Enoshima. The brazenness of that woman is truly something else.” Touko is not sure if she says that from a place of respect or fear, and honestly she relates. And also doesn’t say any further on the subject because Celes gives her a dirty look.

Her gaze goes back out to their peers— she is pointedly avoiding needing to look at where Enoshima is— and spots Komaru and Yuta splashing around with Aoi and Oogami. Well, it looks like just splashing at least, from where she’s at. And Hagakure, who really just looks like an out-of-place sea cretin with the way his hair floats on the water’s surface, so. There’s that?

( No, she’s not at all envious of the fact that all of them get to have fun because they don’t have crippling fears: the ocean does not instill the same fear of confinement that a cramped bathtub does, but fear— there is still the fear that something will tug her down and her body will simply let herself dragged underneath out of instinct, a fear of something worse if she tries to fight for survival— )

Focus. She can feel the way her breath catches a little, the uneasy way her heart beats and concentrates on calming down. She doesn’t seem to have gotten Syo’s attention yet, nor anyone else’s, thankfully. She’ll just...watch Komaru for now, yeah. It takes a moment to relocate her, head breaching from underneath the water and surfacing like...like one of the sea’s legendary enchantresses. She means that in a wholly respectful way, of course, watching the way she shakes the water from her hair, mouth open in a wide grin while she laughs. Touko doesn’t need to hear her to know that on the sole basis of her appearance— the bright look in her eyes is enough to say she is happily enjoying herself without her.

On that note, hm. Maybe she can use some of that for the basis of her next novel— something about a siren and a lady visiting the sea? Tragic romances are always a hit, aren’t they? Okay maybe a tragic lesbian romance is more self-projection, but that's besides the point. No one has to know its self-projection if people eat it up like anything else that has her name on it.

Or maybe you need to talk to a therapist more often? Syo contributes helpfully, apparently having become more conscious at some point. Maybe her panic hadn’t gone as unnoticed as she thought. Not that they’re wrong, but talking to a therapist isn’t exactly going to help with her gay pining ( unfortunately, she wishes it were that simple ).

Yeah, that’s not something she really wants to linger on, and as if Celes can read her mind, says, “How do you ladies feel about a bet?”

“Pass.” Touko says immediately, because she is arguably far from a smart person, but she is smart enough to know to not take her chances against the ultimate gambler. Celes ignores her.

“You see, I would bet that Komaru—”

“No. We’re leaving h-her out of it.” Toko interrupts, and Fujisaki ( thankfully, like the god sent angel she is, even if she seems too good to be real ) nods her agreement.

“I don’t think Naegi-kun would be really happy if he heard us talking about his little sister like that...” Her reasoning is fair, if nothing else.

“Fine. Do you think Naegi-kun is going to interfere on Togami-kun’s behalf, or help Kuwata-kun?” A painted fingernail points out the trio by the sea. Kuwata seems pretty intent on forcing Togami into the sea, suit and all, much to his disdain. The duo is yelling, probably. On the other hand, Makoto just looks like he doesn’t know whose side he’s supposed to be on here.

In the end, it doesn’t matter because by some luck ( or lack thereof ) Togami manages to trip on a washed up stone and ends up taking the other two boys down with him. The heir doesn’t even look all that mad, really, as Kuwata dunks him back under the water in retaliation: she knows what his angry face is, and that is not it, even if it looks kind of like he’s swallowing a lemon.

Or maybe that’s just her and her sour mood feeling like she’s swallowed several lemons raw because Touko doesn’t know how to make lemonade out of all the citrus life has handed her.

“By the way Fukawa-san, about Komaru—” Celes starts, but is interrupted by Komaru’s sharp yelling, which is followed by the wet feeling of her arms wrapping around her. Touko frowns, pushing her away.

“You’re w-wet.” She states the obvious as she makes a face, not that that seems to stop her. “Are you...you're done going in the water f-f-for now?”

“Mhm! It’s too cold in the water, honestly. You’re nice and warm.” Komaru hums happily, and she grabs a towel from her bag to wrap her up in it before she ends up being the next sick kid. “I was thinking we could maybe spilt a snack...? And then we could make a sandcastle! Asahina-san was telling me about shells she saw earlier that we could use?” Touko bites back a small snort at how childish she sounds.

“Yeah, yeah— let go of me, s-so I can get up...” She agrees, ignoring the curious way Celes’ watches their interactions. She mutters something that passes for a thanks before she leaves ( not that she thinks Fujisaki notices at that point, full enraptured by her laptop screen ).

By snack, Touko realizes that this is more of a way of making sure she eats lunch— Syo had not so accidentally let it slip once that when she gets caught up on things, she has the tendency to skip meals. She bites her tongue on saying that it wasn’t necessary and instead pays for their meal because she can do that, she has the money to spare for that kind of thing: and she knows she doesn’t need to, but sometimes she feels like she needs to make it up to her before Komaru gets sick of their friendship.

And if it comes off like a date, that’s simply just coincidence.

When they return to the shore, Komaru drags her off to an area a little more secluded— she doesn’t really realize this at first, simply accepting her fate to follow along, but notices she can’t really hear anyone else. It helps her relax, feel like she doesn’t need to be so guarded.

( It doesn’t stop Touko from briefly complaining about how sandy she’s going to get because of this, which is annoying. And then immediately shuts up because Komaru offers to let her borrow her clothes, and she has nothing coherent that she can say to that. She eventually manages to spit out a no when it becomes obvious Komaru is waiting for her to say something )

“Well, okay then. You can always let me know if you change your mind.” She says, then, “Oooh, Touko-chan! It looks like there are tide pools over here!”

Komaru leaves her to pick out shells for them to use while she does the dirty work of constructing a sand castle. “So you won’t end up too sandy,” she explains. “And I trust your eyes to pick out nice shells.” She can’t really complain— although she almost makes a scathing comment about the fact that her eyes can't really be trusted when she wears glasses— and just keeps away from the waves for the most part. The water laps at her feet while she lingers around the tide pool, and then returns with the fruits of her search.

It’s...not an awfully constructed sand castle. Well, that’s probably more than a little generous to say. You know, if she was going to compare it to something kids made. As it stands ( or doesn’t, if Touko is being honest ), it’s probably not the most...concretely built and looks like part of the base might fall apart at any moment, but doesn’t say anything as she dumps an assortment of shells at her feet. And then pulls out a towel, so she can sit and watch her work. It feels like there’s another problem with this, but she can’t quite place what it is; it’s probably not important enough to point out.

Going back to the novel idea: maybe it’s not about a siren after all. Maybe it’s about a sea princess instead. A lonely girl drowning in the waters called home, in a lonely castle, and—

“Here you go!” Komaru plops a shell into her hand with no warning and beams at her. “It’s nice and pretty just like you, Touko-chan. So you should keep it!”

She definitely doesn’t almost tear up upon hearing that, swallowing thickly as she bites back a self-deprecating, Are you sure it’s not just ugly like me? Instead, she picks out a small shell from the pile and holds it out to her.

“...H-H-Here. Completely plain and, and average like you.” And cute, but that’s not important. Still, Komaru looks like she’s actually said something of worth as she throws her arms around her neck.

“Thank you! I’ll take good care of it.” She acts like she’s given her a houseplant or something of actual value, and not a shell.

Stiffly— because she still really doesn’t know how to respond in these kinds of moments, despite being friends for a few odd months now— Touko pats her back and mutters, “It’s not that big of a deal.”

“It is!” Komaru pouts at her. “It is to me. Isn’t that enough?”

She opens her mouth to point out that she’d really just been reciprocating a gesture, but the wave crashing over them interrupts the conversation— oh yeah, she thinks absently. That’d been the other problem that she’d noticed when Komaru had started building, but hadn’t thought it was a big enough issue to point out.

Once she processes that yes, that happens, her first thought is how cold she is now, soaked to the bone. Touko represses a shudder and tries to ignore the fact that she will need to shower later because salt water gets itchy. The second thing that occurs to her, in the midst of this, is that now Komaru is wailing into her shoulder.

“I should’ve been more careful, I’m sorry Touko-chan! You’re okay? You aren’t upset, are you? I thought th—” Touko leans forward to cut her off. Her lips taste like salt, and vaguely reminiscent of the sweet snack Komaru had coaxed her into splitting. She wants to bite down on her lip, a nervous habit, and pulls back before she can accidentally manage to bite the other’s lips instead. The implications of that are a lot more than she’s willing to handle right now, and averts her gaze as soon as she leans back, so she does not have to acknowledge her actions.

That doesn’t stop Komaru from throwing her arms around her a little too eagerly, a grunt at the impact of their bodies colliding. “Too m-much.” Touko manages to wheeze out, and before she can start apologizing again, follows with, “I’m not upset. I should probably just...just buy something overpriced from one of th-the nearby shops since our clothes are soaked now...”

She takes this in fairly good stride, jumping to her feet and pulling her up by her hands. “Can I pick out an outfit for you? It’ll be fun!”

Their ideas of fun are very different quite frankly, but considering Komaru won’t overthink her appearance like she does, thus meaning it’ll be more time efficient. And quite frankly, she’s tired, so she just agrees. On the condition they can just go take a nap in the car afterwards.

Touko doesn’t quite agree with Komaru’s fashion choices, but she picks out clothes that cover up everything that needs to be hidden, so she can’t exactly complain. Nor does she complain when they do less napping and more snuggling in the backseat. Which means on the ride back, Komaru ends up falling asleep on her shoulder. She thinks about how pretty she looks in the light of the sunset.

Maybe she can rethink her next novel being a romantic tragedy.

#tokomaru week 2021 #toukomaru #tokomaru #komaru naegi #toko fukawa #touko fukawa #danganronpa #* zhi writes

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temarisnara · 4 years

Note

sannin

oh,,,,mess,,,,

jiraiya

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang | hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff (points to meta on naruto’s post) best quality: oh boy. ok. without a doubt it’s his heart. i wanted to hate him, i did hate him, but i saw him with naruto. with tsunade. with the ame trio. how he never gave up on orochimaru. he loves deeply. he’s also like, such a lowkey caretaker because of it, and i’ve talked before about he’s the steady one when things go to shit. just, god!!! everything about his bonds with other people GETS to me. worst quality: HIS SEXUAL HARASSMENT OF WOMEN LMAO like GOD. there’s meta about how jiraiya uses sex to cope, about wanting intimacy but fearing loss, and THAT is fun. but kishimoto was like what if we make it a RUNNING GAG because jiraiya is so fucking horny!!! FUCK. ITS BAD. also, taking away shitty writing, this man is a goddamn sagittarius in the WORST way. he runs away from responsibility like no other! his refusal to accept the hat, the fact he CLEARLY avoided the village for 12 fucking years so he wouldn’t have to Deal with the fact he’s naruto’s godfather, HE JUST ABANDONED 3 FUCKING 12-13 YEAR OLDS IN A WARZONE AFTER BEING THEIR ONLY CAREGIVER FOR 3 YEARS WITHOUT EVEN ASKING IF THEY’D WANT TO COME BACK TO KONOHA WITH HIM????? JIRAIYA IM COMING FOR YOU ship them with: tsunade and orochimaru are his SOULMATES brotp them with: tsnunade and orochimaru are his GOVERNMENT ASSIGNED BEST FRIENDS. also naruto, minato, and the ame trio. needs to stay away from: uhhhhhhhhhh genuinely anyone besides tsunade and orochimaru. no one deserves this disaster man. misc. thoughts: i’m So mad how much i love him. like it’s fine i’m a comics stan i’m used to picking and choosing which parts of canon i accept. but i truly lost a lot of self respect when i was forced to admit i stan jiraiya.

tsunade

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff best quality: her strength. like, obviously she’s physically a powerhouse, but emotionally she keeps getting knocked down and getting back up. and it’s like...not even a trait she acknowledges? i think because of her years of drifting, drinking away her pain, gambling to feel the adrenaline rush, she doesn’t consider herself emotionally strong, but like. she lost dan, and nawaki. she lost orochimaru to his quest for power, she lost jiraiya to his worldly adventures. she did what she could to cope. and when she agreed to become hokage, she put all that on the back burner. when orochimaru died, she didn’t let herself feel it. when jiraiya died, she let herself breakdown privately, and then pulled herself back together. when pain attacked the village, she kept everyone alive. she never buckled under her own grief, her own pain. she’s so fucking strong!!!!! worst quality: god i WISH canon would show tsunade is JUST as messy and awful as jiraiya and orochimaru. like i saw someone going off about how it’s not fair to compare tsunade’s addiction to jiraiya’s horny bullshit or orochimarru’s literal war crimmes and that’s true! but it is fair to talk about how tsunade is an INSANE PERSON who trained a 12 year old child everyday until her bones broke and made her KEEP GOING WITH BROKEN BONES. like, i’m NOT LETTING THIS ONE GO TSUNADE!!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!! ship them with: jiraiya and orochimaru!!! brotp them with: jiraiya and orochimaru, sakura, shizuune, kakashi, naruto needs to stay away from: anyone besides jiraiya and orochimaru. like, technically, there’s nothing wrong with tsunade/dan, except it’s the most boring ship i’ve ever laid eyes on. misc. thoughts: she really is such a cool, well written, underutilized character lmao. i really wish we’d gotten more of tsunade’s complexity and messiness.

orochimaru

general opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang (I AM TALKING STRICTLY BORUTO AND SANNIN ERA OROCHIMARU. OG NARUTO AND EVEN SHIPPUDEN NARUTO IS UGLY!!!) hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuff best quality: none <3 i love orochimaru because he’s an incredibly complex character, not because he has good qualities! like if i had to name his best quality, it’s his love for mitsuki. orochimaru and mitsuki are the ONLY reason i acknowledge boruto because everything else is BAD. worst quality: LITERAL! WAR! CRIMINAL! ship them with: tsunade and jiraiya!! brotp them with: tsunade and jiraiya!!! i like fandom acting like he’s sasuke’s annoying godfather. needs to stay away from: literally anyone besides the sannin. misc. thoughts: bro kishimoto dropped the BALL here. orochimaru is so fucking complex, there’s LAYERS here. like, we have this little war orphan, the last of his kind, who never learned or understood morality. but he had jiraiya and tsunade to guide him. he trusted them. they were loud, and annoying, but he trusted them. but war happened. war happened, and orochimaru led the mission nawaki died on. he stood and watched, unable to do anything, as dan bled out in tsunade’s arms. death surrounded him. he became desensitized to it, while also being terrified of it. the timeline is wonky, but in MY head jiraiya leaving was the start of orochimaru pulling away. he and tsunade didn’t talk as much those years. he became obsessed with forbidden jutsus. when jiraiya came back, orochimaru was willing to kill him so he and tsunade could get away. danzo started manipulating him, encouraging his desire for power and knowledge, his lack of morals. neither tsunade or jiraiya noticed or reached out. hell, they might’ve already left at this point, which is also a blow for him- i truly think their abandonment hit orochimaru Hard. and the final blow came when sarutobi chose a CHILD over him to become hokage. he’d dedicated his life, he’d killed and bled for the village, and still it wasn’t enough, sarutobi still didn’t trust him, didn’t see him worthy. just. FUCK!!!!!!!!!!! OROCHIMARU IS SO INTERESTING AND ITS NEVER EXPLORED!!!!!!!!!!!!

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farashasilver · 7 years

Note

hey! so, i realize im late af, but i finally took the plunge by binging yoi today. once i was done you were the first person that came to mind. idk if you give recs, but i was wondering - what would you say are some essential must-reads for a newbie to the fandom? fic that really blends into the canon and maybe fills those emotional gaps? (feel free to rec your own work as well ofc!) i'd really appreciate you pointing me in the right direction as i consider you a huge yoi resource! 💕

HI I AM THE WORST you asked me this literal months ago and I’m only just now getting around to making you a rec list. It’s been a real busy back half of the year.

OKAY SO I’m gonna put these behind a cut because this is a wall of recs. At least it’s somewhat organized. Some of these are very strong in the canon setting, a handful of them are AUs. You’re not going to get much plumbing of emotional depths from the PWPs, although there are one or two that stand out as really grounding their relationship in skating. Please enjoy this massive list of fic and mea culpa for taking so long to answer you (and I only recced three of my own fics lmao).

Cute short fics that are Safe For Work

Easy on my knees by ineptshieldmaid - Victor’s subby thing explored as a character studyAddicted (to the taste of you) by smudgesofink - After the Cup of China, Yuuri can’t stop kissing Victoryou’re like heaven to touch by lazulisong - Yuuri is wearing Victor’s jacket and Victor likes that a lotYuuri Katsuki Secret Route Walkthrough/FAQ by Metis_Ink - Meta fic written as if the show is an otome game/dating sim, really cutebetter than sliced bread by ebenroot - Victor owns a Yuuri body pillow because of course he doesthe naming of cats by csoru - Otayuri, a little bit of their careers and mostly them gravitating together for a relationshipa slow invasion of the heart by radialarch - Otayuri, Yuri is straightforward about what he wantsIf We Had No Winter by FreshBrains - Lilia/Minako fic where they maybe had a relationship when they were younger and reconnect nowStay Close to Me by dasedandconfuzed - AU where Vicchan doesn’t die before the GPF in Sochi and Yuuri just barely doesn’t medalNight is Young and the Music’s High by opalish - Yuuri somehow gets roped into another breakdancing contest at the press conference for Japanese Nationals. Outsider point of view.Of Love and Other Emotions by smudgesofink - Two fics of nothing but incredibly tooth-rotting fluffthe warmest part of winter by dadvans - Wedding ficThe Bulge (Don’t Bring a Weapon to a Public Beach) by nagoyadelay - Yuuri posts beach pictures. The internet gains an obsession with Victor’s dick.Feet first (Don’t Fall) by gunboots - Otayuri, awkward teenage romcom shenanigans

Smutty Victuuri one-shots

all the sparks you’re trying to hide by pageleaf - Yuuri gets in touch with his inner doma little love, a little sympathy by pageleaf - Yuuri figures out that Russian names have diminutives and uses it to his advantagea day for all the rest by Etharei - Morning after the Cup of China, a Victor introspective plus sweet morning sexStraight to Video by SocialDegenerate - Pre-canon, Victor’s sex tape leaks and Phichit promptly sends it to Yuuri because Phichit is the bro we all wish we could havei’ve come to be where you are (i can’t help it) by incode - Just some nice kinky sexsmoke and mirrors by grim_lupine - Victor randomly gets de-aged to his long haired teenage self and they bonePraise Please by surveycorpsjean - Praise kinkVictor Effing Nikiforov by shysweetthing - Yuuri doesn’t bomb Nationals and ends up at Worlds in the season before canon, is extremely confused as to why Victor is so interested in himTalk to Me by SuggestiveScribe - Yuuri has a language kink for Victor speaking RussianSubmission by SuggestiveScribe - Shibari bondage and orgasm delay with sub VictorStamina Should Have Been a Verb by scribblywobblytimeylimey - 12k words of completely unrepentant marathon sex where Yuuri’s epic inhuman stamina wrecks VictorIMG_20140215.AVI by neomeruru - Victor finds one of Yuuri’s old sex tapes from college where he one of his ex-boyfriends has organized a gangbang for himMaid to Love You by Kizuna_Auri - Victor in a french maid outfit with lots of kink because why notNot an inch of you I didn’t cling to by Farasha - Post-Rostelecom body worship fic, gentle dom Yuuri, Victor is the subbiest service sub who ever subbed, the YOI fic in my repertoire that’s most grounded in canon, I think

Smutty one-shots for Other Ships

Green-Eyed Monster by flammablehat - Victuuri + Yuri’s raging crush on Yuuri, Yuri overhears them having sex and has an angry jerkoff sessionsix feet under by knightswatch - Otayuri, Yuri has a pair of sexy leopard print heels and Otabek is really into them. someone on the dancefloor, waiting just for you by verity - Otayuri, kinky stuffHands On Education by BewareTheIdes15 - Otayuri, hilarious internal Yuri narrative during awkward loss of virginity shenanigansTeach Me Just What Fast Is by Zee - Otayuri, some kink but mostly them figuring out their relationshipDevour by dannydevito - Otayuri, face-sitting and rimmingKind, Sober and Fully Dressed by probablestars - Chris/Phichit, Chris and Phichit make a sex tape togetherthe taste, the flavor by pageleaf - Yuuri/Yuri, Yuri asks Yuuri to help him get rid of his virginity, hints that it could be future Victor/Yuuri/Yuri OT3crimson headache, aching blush by pageleaf - Victor/Yuri, Victor gets drugged with sex pollen and turns to Yuri for help, also features Victor/Yuuri/Yuri phone sexSoft as Snow (But Warm Inside) by Farasha - Yuuri/Yuri, Yuri gets drugged with sex pollen and Yuuri is the one who gives him a hand, plus emotional codaPino Grigio Boys by cherrybulesque - Chris/Victor/Yuuri threesome, they have some fun together in the hotel at a competitionTonight, You’re All Mine by doncastaway - Chris/Victor/Yuuri, Yuuri and Victor give Chris a booty call and he is not complainingOff the Ice by Halrloprillalar - Chris/Victor, someone throws lacy underwear on the ice as a post-skate gift, they have some fun with itwhat flattery gets you by tripcyclone - Chris/Yuuri, pre-canon, Chris expected Yuuri to be shy in bed and gets a lot more than he bargained forVice by Halrloprillalar - Celestino/Chris, Chris has had a crush on Celestino since he was young and seduces him at a bar

Longer Victuuri Fics (any rating)

Maybe It Started Like This by dance_across - Character study into both Yuuri’s anxiety issues and Victor’s insecurity issues and how they navigate those in their relationshipkatsuki_fc wrote by tetsurashian - Outsider POV fic on Yuuri and Victor’s relationship as covered by fan communities and social mediaMaelstrom by feelslikefire - Time loop/groundhog day alternate universe where Victor keeps repeating the Sochi banquet over and over againKintsugi by witchbane - Alternate universe where they’re both in the mafiaCall Everything on the Ice… by shysweetthing - Victor learns Japanese in order to better be able to communicate with Yuuri’s family, also a really sweet look at their relationship developing while they’re in HasetsuThe Boyfriend Experience by cryingoverspilledvodka - Alternate universe where Yuuri had to quit skating and became an escort instead, somehow he still ends up in Victor’s orbitlove like fools by lily_winterwood - Roman Holiday AU, Yuuri is modern Japanese royalty and Victor is a journalist, they run away togetherKings in Couture by slightlied - Devil Wears Prada AU where Victor is the fashionista and Yuuri is his brand new personal assistant (that he thirsts after like woah)we are lost, but we are not gone by persephoneggsy - Dollhouse AU based on the concept of the Joss Whedon show - programmable escorts that can be anyone you want them to be, heavy on the angst and mindfuckeryThe Lily of Kasagiya by Kizuna_Auri - Memoirs of a Geisha AU (kind of) where Yuuri is a famous Geisha and Victor is his favorite charming foreign clientnever stop until the grave by Naraht - A gritty, angsty look at Victor trying to balance coaching Yuuri and coming back to competition at the same timeFated by maydei - Technically a crossover with Loveless but the only thing you need to know about the Loveless universe going in is that everyone has cat ears and tails until they lose their virginity, the author does an excellent job of explaining everything else in the universe

Longer Fics for Other Ships (any rating)

adventures in personal growth by stutter - Otayuri, also features Yuri’s raging crush on Yuuri, series of three fics, Yuri completely and utterly fails at anything resembling “taking it slow”i walk my days on a wire by idrilka - Otayuri, long distance relationship with pining and Skype sexFrom Almaty, With Love by BoxWineConfessions - Otayuri, slow burn get-together fic where Yuri comes to train in Almaty for the summerNeon Pink Motorcycle by goldheart - Otayuri, soulmate/soulmark AU where Yuri’s soulmark is damaged so he can’t see ithe (walked like, looked like) burned like summer by foxfireflamequeen - Victor/Yuri, alternate universe where Yuri suffers a career-ending injury and seeks out the fae to get what he wants (in this fic, Victor is not a skater, he’s a faerie)Commemorative Photos by airspaniel & dance_across - Phichit/Yuuri, Chris/Phichit, Chris/Victor, Victor/Yuuri; a series of fics that starts with Phichit and Yuuri in college and leads into Victor and Yuuri’s wedding (where Phichit and Chris hook up)i know where my heart lies by orro - Yuuri/Yuri, an alternate universe where Yuuri is the 27yo champion, Yuri is the 24yo Russian ace who can’t quite keep up, and Victor is the bratty 16yo prodigyHalf a Chance by ratherunnecessary - Otayuri, also Yuri’s raging crush on Yuuri, a slow-burn fic of Yuri figuring out how the fuck to deal with his feelingsVodka Tonic by Halrloprillalar - Chris/Georgi, a hookup that starts after the Cup of China turns into something that resembles emotions over timeRed, Yellow, Green by dance_across - Chris/Yuuri/Victor, what starts out as a hookup turns into something like a relationshipbite down (to me) by pageleaf - Victor/Yuuri/Yuri, Victor and Yuri seduce Yuri through skating choreography because this is YOI and of course they doAn Excuse to Be There by shadow_lover - Victor/Yuuri/Yuri, Yuri kept the pole dancing pictures from the Sochi banquet on his phone, Victor and Yuuri know whyOpen My Heart by Farasha - Victor/Yuuri/Yuri, Alpha/Beta/Omega alternate universe where Yuri goes into heat unexpectedly, drags Victor with him, and they all have to figure out how to make it work

#yuri on ice #yoi #fic recs #ask box answers #twobrokenwyngs

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sugarpunkeyes · 7 years

Note

1-99 😎

ITCHY I HA T E YOU (but im still gonna do it cause. this feels like a challenge)

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most?alternate version of behind the sea by panic! at the discofuckmylife666 by against me!like a child hiding behind your tombstone by slothrust brain stew/jaded by green daybaba o'reilly by the whoacross the universe by the beatles

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?unlikely person ,, laura !! jane !! grace !! slightly more likely person(s) ,, @thesmashingpumpkins or @billiejoeshappytrail @xkidiot cause you’re wonderful

3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.“…and, of course, Crass, who remain my favorite band to this day.” (from Tranny by Laura!! wild)

4: What do you think about most?music as a general statement probably. whether it’s my own writing/band stuff/practicing instruments

5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?“And ya but nvm” from @gathering-up-the-avenues

6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?with pajamas !

7: What’s your strangest talent?i can figure out how to set or fix/take apart & rebuild any watch or clock i’ve ever come across

8: Girls… (finish the sentence); Boys… (finish the sentence)??? girls are girls. boys are boys. i’m unwilling to gender stereotype esp in the binary lmao

9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?i am not aware of that happening, no

10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?i was texting my favo(u)rite british bo(u)y itchy ( @billiejoeshappytrail ) like two hours ago and playing loads of music

11: Do you have any strange phobias?not that i’m.. aware of ?? i get really freaked out by looking straight-on at a pin, like right at the pointy off when it’s facing me but that’s not really a phobia

12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?i’m sure i have. i mean fingers are foreign technically so

13: What’s your religion?jewish ;)

14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?listening to music in headphones ,, walking ,, zoning out

15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?behind ,, but i like having photos of myself and i find it really fun to help out my photographer friends ,, they’re so good i’m lov my artsy humans

16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?The Beatles !

17: What was the last lie you told?i told my mom i checked the weather this morning when she asked how cold it was but i actullt just stuck my head out my window and guessed

18: Do you believe in karma?nah, bad stuff and good stuff happens to everyone

19: What does your URL mean?it was from Years Ago ™ when i was equally obsessed with doctor who and star trek. sonic (screwdriver) ; (star) trek

20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?uHm i’m really bad about emotions as a whole?? if i’m confronted about how i’m feeling and i am Not In The Mood to talk about how i am then i will 100% say i’m fine no matter whati’m good at music i think ,, i’ve been writing music since i was little and i know 10-ish instruments?

21: Who is your celebrity crush?Laura. Jane. Grace. i’m lov

22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?yyep

23: How do you vent your anger?i kick/punch walls (i have a wall in my room w lots of studs, i know where to hit it so nothing will break), write music (nerd), throw tennis balls at my garage door

24: Do you have a collection of anything?i have journals i’ve filled out, presidential/gold dollars, state quarters (every state, every year), an old keychain collection, loads of books, and unofficially lots of band/tour shirts ;)

25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?video chatting !

26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?i am, but only because i know my two options are to like myself or dislike myself and there’s no way of saying i won’t totally reinvent myself tomorrow. so yes, but just because i believe in constant change and i’m proud of the changes i’ve made

27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?i haTe the scratch when you have a metal utensil on a china/porcelain plate ugGgHhh and i love the noise when you lean on someone and they’re happy about it and they go “mhm”

28: What’s your biggest “what if”?what if i can’t do all of the things i love in my life?

29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?not ghosts, absolutely aliens

30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.right arm touched my house/car keys, left arm touched my glasses on my bed

31: Smell the air. What do you smell?hotdogs i think (my family’s having a barbecue)

32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?worst place .. like worst city? i don’t like detroit at all

33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?EAST COAST succ it @xkidiot @sloanthewench

34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?i am. all the genders i literally ,, what ????? uhh i don’t know any agender singers off the top of my head ?? but i’m lov billie joe armstrong and laura jane grace and gerard way has said he doesn’t really identify with male or female so. him too

35: To you, what is the meaning of life?just growing as a human and then helping others grow

36: Define Art.creation that invokes feeling ( @danlitty would know better than me ,, she is The Art ™ )

37: Do you believe in luck?not really but i wear mismatched socks because i think matching socks are bad luck so. uhHh idk

38: What’s the weather like right now?it was raining and like 65 degrees and now it’s just gray and a lil warmer

39: What time is it?3:38 PM

40: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?yes, i didn’t crash but i hit someone’s car while i was pulling out of a parking spot

41: What was the last book you read?not really a book, but i read a compilation of loads of doom patrol comics

42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?to an extent .. like the first min or so is nice

43: Do you have any nicknames?yeah, my real name’s grace but everyone calls me gracie or gee or graice or goot or geebee (thanks shaney) or graciebell or groot or greasy

44: What was the last film you saw?the butterfly effect with the green goons!!

45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?i broke my nose twice .. i’m pretty safe overall

46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?yep! but v carefully and let it go immediately

47: Do you have any obsessions right now?always ,,,, just band stuff

48: What’s your sexual orientation?i call myself bi but i’m just gay for everyone

49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?nope

50: Do you believe in magic?n o

51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?depends how bad it was

52: What is your astrological sign?pisces

53: Do you save money or spend it?save

54: What’s the last thing you purchased?i only owned the cassette tape version of 1,039/Smoothed Out Slappy Hours so i bought the iTunes version

55: Love or lust?love

56: In a relationship?yes!!!! @thesmashingpumpkins is my amazing boyfriend i like him a lot :)

57: How many relationships have you had?¯\_(ツ)_/¯

58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?yeah !!

59: Where were you yesterday?i just literally worked at home all day.. in the wee hours of the morning i was at midnight run in new york city (delivering clothes/food to the homeless)

60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?my sweatshirt !

61: Are you wearing socks right now?yyyyes and one has a banana on it and one has sharks eating people

62: What’s your favourite animal?snow leopards

63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?this is a thing ????? i’m just. sarcastic

64: Where is your best friend?my best friend in NY is named abby and she lives 3 blocks away from me, my best irl friend outside NY is from Rhode Island, and shaney who’s my best internet friend ( @xkidiot ) is in CA !! i’m lov all

65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr.@thesmashingpumpkins@xkidiot@danlitty@billiejoeshappytrail@poisin-youth

66: What is your heritage?i’m ,, white ,, european ,,,, lithuania, russia, hungary, turkey etc

67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?texting/watching the movie w the green goons

68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?armstrong. definitely armstrong.

69: Biggest turn ons?this is NOT THE SIN CHAT

70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?I think so cause most of my friends are sarcastic and i’m sarcastic

71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?gET THE DOG AND CARRY IT TO MY WORKPLACE AND SHOW MY BOSS I WAS BEING A MODEL CITIZEN ™

72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?a) lmao yeah, everyone deserves to know ?? people affect other people, that’s the point of life, so if i’ve affected anyone, they deserve to knowb) try to get to see all my favorite people even if i haven’t met them beforec) i mean probably ??

73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.love

74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?so many ,, yellow submarine and JOS and so many others

75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?8903

76: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?knowing that the other person cares about you and about the world in general or just having it be with @thesmashingpumpkins , the most amazing man. ,

77: How can I win your heart?you can’t, jimmy already has it

78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?hell yeah

79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?learning guitar

80: What size shoes do you wear?8.5 women’s

81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?idk some quote from the giver probably

82: What is your favourite word?mmm calcify

83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.that song “heart and soul” that everyone knows on piano

84: What is a saying you say a lot?i’ve noticed i say “you know” a lot ,,

85: What’s the last song you listened to?eight full hours of sleep by against me!

86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?blue ! all shades of blue esp bluey-greens

87: What is your current desktop picture?it’s that picture of young green day ™ in a taxi and they’re flipping off the camera

88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?this guy that picks on jimmy his name is christian and he’s first on the kill list

89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?variations on “how do you feel”

90: Turn offs?ddont choke me ,, don’t pee on me ,,

91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?ccontrolling time ,,

92: where are your parents from? OH and NY

93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?lol i went to the hospital once cause i couldn’t sleep for 4-5 days straight and everything about that was wild

94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?i’ve said it multiple times before, ill say it again. laura. jane. grace.

95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?GO VISIT ITCHY OR SHANEY cause i can’t drive to them but i can drive to jimmy :)

96: Do you have any relatives in jail?nope

97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?omg so many times

98: Ever been on a plane?yeah!! also so many times

99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say?there’s no reason not to try your best

thank u itchy ;)

#long ass post #answers #i spent an entire hour on this

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