#im not the healthiest person but im trying dude!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thats all that matters

[ourblueming]

Odd question but I’m trying to get all healthy, maybe even work out and I was wondering if you had any food tips or anything at all

WARNING: MOM FRIEND MODE ACTIVATED

not an odd q at all!! proud of u for trying/starting to get healthy!! in regards to starting to workout i would suggest taking a jog or run every morning for about 30 minutes. i say ‘every’ morning (or at least 2-3 times a week because isn’t nature just wonderful and it sets u up for the day yknow?). like yeah who the hell wants to get up at 6:30 or 7 for a run but it’s a helluva mood booster and does wonders for your health physically and mentally. im not sure if the place u live has a large park or a running pathway but it’s great to utilise spaces like that. imo gyms aren’t That good (maybe it’s just me and my cheap ass) but yeah if you can afford a gym membership go for it!! gyms are also a safer place if you choose to exercise at night rather than a park. if you’re on a budget i suggest either going running around your local area or having a set routine you can do at home (eg sit ups, push ups. u can find plentyyy on youtube). if you have a friend that wants to get more daily exercise too then u both can work out together. i think that’d be a lot of fun, even if you just walk or run with your dog that’s great too!! ooh make sure u have appropriate exercise clothing as well.

as for healthier food tips/options, i suggest opting for healthier snacks. like if youre craving sugar or sweetness like lollies, change it to fruits!! fruits have natural sugar and is much lower than other sweetened foods (eg cherries, mangoes). and when eating bread perhaps instead of white bread maybe go for wholemeal/multigrain. the same can be said for brown rice. the alternatives can make such a difference to your body. oh gosh i know that fruit juice can be seen as healthy but it’s really not  if u rely on it to be your daily fruit intake. when and if u can just eat whole fruits!! they’re so much better for u fam. also substituting chips with peanuts, walnuts or dried banana chips is an option too. im throwing a bunch of info at u sorry but also incorporate dairy, legumes, fish, and poultry in your dishes (if u can)!! they’re just as important as fruits and vegetables. also if u can’t buy these fresh, canned options are available too and more budget friendly.

meal prepping can do wonders as well, especially if you’re a college or school student.  ooof since ive started uni ive relied more on frozen vegetables but tbh i think that’s fine and just as good. there’s so many options of incorporating them into your food!! wraps, sandwiches, rice, salads. i know making your own food can be time consuming but it’s sooo much better than buying takeaway or horribly overpriced college food. cooking for/with ur friends is gr8 too!!!! heres a link ( http://smilesandwich(.)com/2018/12/05/43-healthy-meal-prep-recipes-thatll-make-your-life-easier/ )

like if u want to go all out then u can even download a food diary app to keep track of what you’re putting in your body or calculating the calories (might be overkill cos i just think being healthy is making healthier choices in life and not relying on the numbers TOO much).

treat yourself as you would a best friend when shopping, packing, or cooking your food. like im not saying completely cut out chocolate and carbs but just have more discretion. u deserve the best

ALSO!!! don’t forget your water and stay hydrated. remember youre making healthy choices for u and urself only! keep in mind u do need self efficacy and self determination during this journey but i truly believe in you ❤️❤️❤️ wish u all the best!!

[steveandbucky]

if i say that i think “monogamy conflicts with the inherent nature of human beings” it does NOT mean that i think it’s a Bad and Unnatural thing. it literally links back to our whole, We Are Social Creatures DNA thing im always talking about. this is gonna get long but i am trying to make a point.

why is it considered “cheating” if you meet someone who gives you a little bit of that ~ butterflies~ feeling? the idea is that if u have my boygirlfriend and u meet someone who gets ur heart racing? ur not allowed to even feel that kind of physical attraction for anyone else bc it's Cheating. im sorry. WHAT. it makes no sense whatsoever. as an analogy, if u have a sex dream about whoever, would it be okay for someone to make you feel bad about it? about things your unconscious mind came up with in a dream state? no bc thats not how it works.

but this is my logic here.

when i told my friend, “it’s okay you can have a little attraction to men...as a treat....” like whats wrong with that? nothing? doesnt make you any less lesbian! bc its so not in the way str8 dudes fetishising wlw think their magic dick is whats missing from ur life. easy there mr testosterone u can be replaced by a zucchini.jpg (sigh. i have to say it im sorry. please do not put any fruit or vegetables or other edible phallic objects in your private parts. there are toys. there are many many safe to use toys). and not in the way that “sexuality is fluid” or “its a spectrum” or “everyone is a little bi” NO shut up. maybe its that ur attracted in the ‘gender envy’ way or the ‘platonic crush’ way or even the ‘your vibes are so sapphic’ way lmao. like why is half of hozier’s fanbase made up of wlw???? he has the vibes idk what to tell u its pretty soft boy syndrome thats my type anyway 😌

so if i were to say “its okay you can have a little attraction to a pretty person...as a treat..” in that youre not doing anything wrong, it doesn’t invalidate your exclusive/monogamous relationship or identity, and im not talking about it in the sense that you would act on it or are fantasising. i just mean in the way that you have eyes and you experience attraction (romantic and/or sexual) and trying to deny yourself that is only gonna result in more repression and guilt? what are you, catholic? (for legal purposes this is a joke) (or is it?)

some people just radiate the kind of energy i am drawn to. some people have the physical attributes of the people my gay ass 6 year old imprinted on. in the healthiest relationship i have ever been in, to a guy who wasn’t ever actually interested in Men, i had maintained “if you wanna go fuck a guy, im not stopping you. i have none of the physical attributes you would be looking for, hypothetically speaking,” etc etc like. it’s kind of the opposite of the Straight Fear "my bisexual SO is gonna leave me for [person of same gender as them]” and this is just me, because i dont care. there wasn’t any infidelity but i’d openly gush about girls even from the beginning and he dgaf lmao i love his apathy sometimes go girl give us nothing! we were the blueprint idc

there’s just. this idea. its the way the straights (eh, or at least, misogynistic brainwashed incel type men) have been talking about "im fucking my SO but thinking about other people" like thats just the message ive been getting. correct me if im wrong. pop culture and all. uhhh. cant.. relate? just because someone else made u HORNY???? if ur horny, look at ur right hand. now look at ur left hand. now look at the technological advancements of our time. ur welcome. sorry im not into using people to scratch the itch! if i wanna fuck someone its bc theyre hot and im into them! im not gonna be secretly thinking about getting railed by rachel weisz. and no matter what anyone says there is intimacy!

im saying that its completely normal to experience that ‘alterous attraction’ and hey maybe it is my primal-evolutionary ADHD brain but if it is, it is Correct. that you can ‘look respectfully’ and you can feel your feelings (even if said feelings last two minutes or a week or a year or two) i’ve been saying “i love too much care too much feel too much” (derogatory) but then i turned around and said “i love everybody because i love you” (affectionate)

its the “i fall in love a little ol' little bit every day with someone new” and “i love you” / “it’ll pass” and “nothin' lasts forever but this is gettin' good now” and “you are my favourite what if / you are my best i’ll never know” and “wanting was enough / for me it was enough” and my personal favourite peak lesbian brain experience “i see girls in my building / i see girls on the train / i've got the girls on my mind all the time” im sorry but have you SEEN women? exactly.

this idea that promiscuity is okay for men, but definitely not for women, and you’re not allowed to have sex or even want to have sex with people. plural. people. just. because. its fun. holy shit. we are, the entire world, fucking repressed. we can talk about it like when you're in the beginning and ur all over each other bc it's new and exciting and it's infatuation! there's something fun about that! it’s the Primal Instinct and idk why we’re meant to deny that either. because it’s not just that. its not just the dopamine.

why do we form bonds with the people we fuck when our brains are like, “fine. here, you can have a little oxytocin... i’d rather you do it in the house bla bla bla” as if we’re gonna sit here and pretend that it doesn’t get better anyway???? you become physically familiar and it's in the same way we talk about love languages “we’ve had one, yes. what about second love language?” and that’s the physical one akdgjakgh IM SORRY. we learn about each other’s love languages and sex languages. it checks out idk

but back to the main point, that We Are Social Creatures.

i mean, even if are monogamous by choice, because we evolved in the way that both parents take care of the children - but so do their neighbours and their siblings and friends like this is the ‘destroy the nuclear family norm’ essentially and its such a westernised concept. it just doesn’t make sense to me!! and im not trying to push a non-monogamous agenda or whatever, as with everything in life, it is about freedom of choice (without judgmenent, risk of physical/mental harm, etc etc)

but we’re talking about queer history and gay pride because homosexuality has existed for centuries. sorry the straights whitewashed history ig. but why is it far-fetched to say, actually, what we call now ‘queerplatonic relationships’ or ‘collectivist culture’ or that proverb about how ‘it takes a village to raise a child’ like. im pretty sure these things have also existed for centuries. we’ve just been brainwashed into thinking. that they’re unnatural, immoral, or otherwise Wrong and Bad.

but in the way i was rambling and talking about why are we going against our nature and i said “what. its like there are rules for human beings that were not created by a human being. im sure im onto smth here 👀🤭” without realising where i was going and im like. ah. yes. religion. excellent.

what can i say, im a rabid anti-christian hopeless romantic sexual deviant<3

[fallout-snippets]

hello its me rising from the dead because i got a cold and im in an im-so-fucking-crazy-for-hancock-period and i got some crap i wanna vent about

i read somewhere that fahrenheit was hancocks “main squeeze” and i first assumed it was just bootycall and she was like convenient or whatever? but then it just really bugged me because like ok so she’s his bodyguard and they occasionally hook up and there is no issue about that at all? no problem dipping the pen in the company ink? like obv. hancock has a pretty free and healthy view of sexual relationships, they don’t have to be a big deal, sometimes you just gotta fool around for a bit and it doesn’t have to mean you have to get married or something, sex can just be sex

but it bugs me because fahr is his bodyguard. so i looked up the definition on urban dictionary and apparently main squeeze is casual relationship, or a person you have sexual relations with and strong feelings but you’re not monogamous and can boink other people and you’re not like “together”. but still super close.

and like how awkward would that be for sole? personally id be superjealous even if it was just a casual booty call once in a while for convenience sake and thats on me, i know thats not the healthiest reaction, and even if both fahr and hancock agreed not to continue id never be comfortable with her continuing being a bodyguard or like being THAT close to him afterwards, and like again i know thats on me, but yknow? i gotta rant and vent

and honestly the only place i can see a reference to fahrenheit being hancocks main squeeze is on her wiki page and it’s written in a physical survival guide which makes me think (and hope) that it was written before anything was truly determined and before hancock was the romanceable character he is now

which also brings me to the point of fahrenheit being hancocks daughter with is super weird because if thats the case, why is she his bodyguard? maybe thats what she’s the best at but like then why doesn’t he give a hoot if she gets killed? if he doesnt know, why wouldnt she have ever told him? or do neither know and it’s just the freakiest coincidence ever?

i dont even know what the code says, if its “parent/child” or “parent/daughter”, because the first one can be explained away that you have the parent A and the child AB as in relation to eachother, if something happens to A then AB will react because they’re connected, but if something happens to AB it doesnt mean A will react because it’s the parent file, it’s like the bottom of the pyramid. if the top falls down its fine, the foundation is still there but if the bottom craps out then the top falls too, if that makes sense. like preston would be A and ronnie shaw would be AB, or parent/child

but if it says the second then its fucking weird, man, because why would you specify gender in code unless it means something specific?

its surprisingly hard for me to ignore canon and because i personally have a knack for making myself suffer even in my selfindulgent fantasies so i really just gotta cement that fahrenheit is only hancocks bodyguard. they have no other relation whatsoever. (just trying to validate myself, if you have other opinions then go nuts my dude, but im losing my cool over this)

hancock has casual flings and hookups but he never enters a state of emotions for anyone other than “these are my people and i have to take care of them” because it would 1. complicate the fuck out of being the mayor and 2. he wants to enjoy fucking around (literally and figuratively)  as much as he wants because isnt that what goodneighbor is all about? and sole is just a special case (because yes i fucking am, fuck off) and they hit all the spots for hancock and like theyre... soulmates or whatever the fuck! its just meant to be! they just happen to be the first person hancock connects with genuinely

im literally just ranting to validate my own feelings and it’s kinda working but if anyone doesn’t mind maybe yall can validate it for me too? like i genuinely get that if i put myself in soles position and wanted to romance hancock id have a super hard time knowing he’s been not only physical but emotionally intimate with his bodyguard that’s supposed to protect him 24/7, then the problem is with me and my insecurities but i just dont have the confidence to trust that he’d be 100% with me no matter how great of a character i think hancock is. these fantasies are supposed to make me feel better and not suffer but that only works half of the time

[eatingdisorderconfession]

I'm about to go into recovery(inpatient) but I'm really afraid. I am a transguy and I have borderline. So for me I developed my anorexia to not commit suicide on the point and to get a more male body without hormones. And that makes me so scared to recover. Because I'll get afemale body back(and dont know if I will get treated as male) and my bpd will really play up again and probably make mereally suicidal again. And that isn't nice. Do you have some calming words, overall for inpatient/recover

Hey love. :) I wanted to send you some words from one of my transguy friends, so I sent him your message and he replied: 

“Hmm well, the first thing that came to mind is that he is a dude and his body IS a dudes body, no matter how curvy. I know thats hard to do and to see like its something i have to keep telling myself but its true. Another thing would maybe be good is to think what body parts make you look feminine? For me its my hips, chest/shoulders and my legs. Im a lazy piece of pie so its hard to really keep at it sometimes but idk i would focus the most of those parts while working out. Also, trying to maintain a healthy diet (lol what) could be helpful. But emotionally its a lot harder and all you really can do is try to he patient. For me, it was a lot of self reflection like "you haven’t committed suicide, why?" my answer is because i didn't want to miss out on being my authentic self. The self reflection would give me something to be proud of and make me want to keep fighting. But ultimately, i feel like he needs to be acknowledged as a dude but he also has to fully acknowledge himself as a dude which is surprisingly hard sometimes. Like he can look at it in a way like anorexia was his way of trying to become the person he wants. Acknowledge that, respect that it was one of the only ways he knew how but its not the only way. Like i dont want to say like be proud of anorexia?? Idk how else to word it though. Be proud of where youve been because you were doing what you thought you had to. I feel like that is his way of trying to be his authentic self so like there needs to be some credit? But then a realization of how its not the healthiest way to do it.

ALSO another thing i try to do is when im getting bad thoughts about my appearance or something i will stop myself and be like "you would not be thinking this way about your trans friends." "You would not be picking them apart right now" "You validate and reassure your friends identity, you deserve that too."”

I think that what he says is really true, you should be proud that you want to be authentic in who you are, but know that there are healthier ways that you deserve.

HERE is our resources for LGBTQA+ and disordered eating.

HERE is our resources on recovery being hard in general.

Be patient with yourself, know that you are worthy of a body you are proud and that is healthy for you.

-Erin