#im so gay for him and i wouldnt change a thing about our relationship tbh

[starssystem]

Love having 2 bfs

[ispreadrabieslikewildfire]

Please tell me about Harper and Feena!

OMEHAGUROHMEGAUR OKOKOKOKOKOKOK SOSOSOOSOSOSO (thamk yo uso much TEHE) alao im sorry if this makes NO SENSE im spilling my head into paragraphs and not proofreading rhis is gonna end HORRIBLY but i hope you enjoy😭!

Anwyay so harper and feena started when @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat asked me to draw a silly guy eating monster much and he turned into harper (ill link some pictures to show) and he felt lonely so i made him a friend called feena and theyve been a thibg since then HOLY SHIT I THINK ITS BEEN 2 YEARS?????

Harper and feena r supposed to be my silly ocs that are my go toos when i start daydreaming and drawing! Their not supoosed to have too much trauma and stuff (IM CONTAINING MYSELF) so i camt head empty and harper its also so when i draw them they make me happy they are my happyness. So becazue i cant give them trauma i make altermate realitoes where i CAN give them trauma!!

Im gonna make sections so i caj explain everthing so it can atleast try to make sense

1. THEIR RELATIONSHIP :3

Ok so when i started I made them friends ofc!! And i thought they where cool as hell so i started thinking about their relationship and i was thinking how wierd it would feel if they where a couple so their thing is that their completely platonic and are jist realy close friends that are realy comfortable with each other, i wouldnt say like 'siblings' but more like that one cousin that your realy close with. I like to think of them as denji and power from chainsaw man (however i see denji and power as more of siblings) but no matter how close they get with eachither they dont feel anything romantic :3 i have a thing that when they where 14/15 they where like fuck it lets kiss and they hated it!!!!! they wanted to die!!!!!

I also have different ages for them i draw them as for whatever mood im in! So i have toddler harper and feena (theyve met in primary school) and then children harper and feena (10-12) and then theres also teen (14-16) and preadult idk forgot what its called (17-19) and adult! (20-22) by 20-22 they have an appartment with 2 other roomates nadia and caspian i dont realy have a story for them yet however they do have designs. So basically they jsut spend their entire lives together as besties and this is their main world where their happy and have no trauma and are just silly!!

2. Sexualities n stuff

Well im nor good at this stuff since i realy have no kmowledge but i kinda just peojected me and @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat onto them...

Harper:

Bisexual, he/they. Dyslexic and/or is on the autism spectrum idk i dont think much about this

Feena:

Aro/ace or Asexual i havent decided, goes by anything. I honestly dont even know she is any and all illnesses

3. Childhood and all

So i dont wanna give them a traumatic childhood since their my silly chracters!!

HOWEVER, they do have some sort of backstories.

Feena:

Some sort of religious trauma, her family where 100% praise our lord and saviour jesus christ and she didnt feel part. Knew what she was when she was a teen and after harper came out and was more comfortable. Didnt tell her parents until she moved out, (they very obviously didnt take it well) however is still in touch with them!! Their just kinda realy uncomforable whenever the subject changes to jesus or gay stuff idk.

Harper:

Twas a bit (a lot) stupider than most people his age (austismmmmm) his parents payed more attention to their sisters so that they could have a better education instead of wasting their time on a child thatll never learn and refuses to listen (wasnt diagnosed till he was an adult so they thought he was being annoying purposefully). Tbh just whats a hug LMAO. He came out to his parents, they told him it was just a phase and theylll get out of it eventually.

So ya!

4. The cats need their own section

So ive always eanted these 2 cats, one called jester one called mariposa. So if i cant have them whats better than having my oc that represents me having them?

This is jester! (SHES PREFECT THIS IS HOW I ENVISION HER)

This is mariposa :3

5. Universes

Like i said since i dont want harper and feena to have too much trauma i create new universes for them! Other than my main ailly one theres another 3 i favour out of all the ones i make

1. I made a dystopian after apocolypse one (MY PERSONAL FAVOURITE ITS SO FUN TO MAKE!!) where the aftermath is that the world (well at leats where their living) is split into two, the privlidged and less priveledged (I NEED NAMES FOR THESE I DONT HAVE ANY) anywwy what i think i can best decribe this as is like the hunger games, where theres the 'capitol' and the 'districts' but instead of there being districts its all just survival of the fittest L lmao so yah. So after the apocolypse harper and feena are split up. Feena ends up with the privileged and harper ends up with the less. Harper finds a place he can call 'home' (FOUNDFAMILYFOUNDFMILYFOUNDFAMILY) and feena ends up on the other side where she gets her memories wiped and she then hets brainwashed to belive she was sent down as a gift from god during hard times and everyone is supposed to worship her (tehe i wont bother yiu with any more of this story)

2. Silly little 80s teen ghost busting show like scooby doo with harper feena nadia and caspian

3. detective harper and feena (havent built a lot)

6. I FORGOT TO ADD DYNAMIC

So basically feena can be smart when she wants to but chooses to fuck around with harper, quite a bitch if you guys just met. Pretty resereved when shes around people she doesnt know amd her social skills arent great. If you give her a chance she can be quite nice and passionate. Can ramble for hours on ends

Harper, guys hes trying his best. Loud, can ramble for hours on end too.

And thats all i can think of...sorry for ramblong so much i jist realy love them. i dont expect anyonw to actually read this... Once again this is just me projecting me and @thatbiblicallyaccuraterat onto harper anf feena!

Thank you @rainbowghostcat sososoososo much i love youuahahhah <333

Ill attach drawing of them in the mprning!

[nyndelion]

hmmm... mob psycho 100, serirei and shou! you don’t have to do all of them ofc

im doing all of them bc i love them ah

001 | Mob Psycho 100

Favorite character: this is so difficult, dont make me choose.... anyway, top three: Shigeo, Teru and Reigen

Least Favorite character: any adult character that feels like its ok to brutally attack teenagers??????? i dont think thats ok even if they are espers.

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): serirei, terumob, ritshou

Character I find most attractive: hhh serizawa and reigen bc im gay :-)

Character I would marry: well ok first of all i dont wanna marry irl but.... serizawa

Character I would be best friends with: almost all of them!! i think i would vibe with Tome, i’d think of myself as her big sibling she could look up regarding lgbt stuff (along with reigen i guess)

a random thought: i was just talking w my partner about how mp100 changed our way to watch anime and i told them i probably wont bother to watch any other anime if it isnt as good

An unpopular opinion: mmh.... idk.... i think Matsuo should have been more explored as a character

My Canon OTP: is Serizawa canon enough? (this show doesnt have any relationships shown except for shigeo and ritsu’s parents now that i think about it)

My Non-canon OTP: this is tricky, how can you prove any of my otps arent canon?...

Most Badass Character: Clearly Shigeo has the biggest most raw powers, but he’s most badass in his character development i think, in the way he sees the world, how he as a main character manages to skip all the “i’m a misunderstood and lonely person bc of my powers” and realize he is the person he is bc he has people around that loves and cherishes him as he is, and that way he feels compelled to be good and kind and the best version of himself.... Epic. Also Reigen is badass bc as ridiculous a character he is, with dubious morals and a lying habit, he is a good person overall and also would die for his loved ones. And idk how he can get away with everything tbh, my mind explodes anytime he twists words and ends up winning arguments, like sir... thats a mad skill right there

Most Epic Villain: Shigeo’s hidden emotions could count as a villain? idk

Pairing I am not a fan of: anything creepy and Bad .... you know the ones.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): idk really, i cant think of anyone. But i remember i was thinking how there arent a lot of female characters, even if the ones it has are super amazing and good... i would like if there were more, and also more explicit nonbinary characters as well... and explicit trans and gnc ones if we are here already...

Favourite Friendship: the entire Body Improvement Club! they all are precious and good pals.

Character I most identify with: Shigeo and Serizawa

Character I wish I could be: sometimes I wish i was as eloquent as Reigen, but then i remember separation arc and its like... no sir. I guess I’d like to be Serizawa to have a job i am good at where the people there know my struggles and are committed to support me through it

002 | Serirei

When I started shipping them: like a month and a half ago? I thought they were cute together a lot of time ago, but it was when i started hardly hyperfixating on mp100 when i was like *eyes emoji* over serirei. Watching the OVA and then reading the manga and all the theories supporting the thesis that its a slow burn coworkers to friends to lovers made me go ♥♥♥♥♥♥

My thoughts: they are dumbasses in LOVE

What makes me happy about them: their interactions overall are priceless, they balance each other a lot and give each other a sense of purpose and stability. Also, i project a little on serizawa and reigen is... y’know.... a flamboyant kind of dude.... which is my type, so.....

What makes me sad about them: the angst when thinking reigen could doubt his feelings or actions around serizawa, worrying over he isnt manipulating him into thinking he is in love, and serizawa thinking he isnt enough for reigen bc he is too nervous about not having enough relationship experience.....

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: when they picture them realizing they have feelings for each other bc they are jealous thinking they could be dating other ppl. I am polyamorous so i Do Not vibe with this trope At All

Things I look for in fanfic: pining... longing.... yearning.... then kiss... fluff.... thats enough to make me cry tbh

My wishlist: (idk what this is about so im skipping hh)

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: idk??? there arent many other characters they have that many chemistry...

My happily ever after for them: they start a thematic restaurant together! bc reigen loves cooking and with their success in Spirits & Such he decides to become a chef and Serizawa works with him, while also attending people’s troubles with spirits. They keep their contact with Shigeo and the rest of the kids and go on trips with them often. They see them grow up and become good people that go after their dreams, and are there for them if they have any trouble or are going though a rough patch.

003 | Shou

How I feel about this character: I feel like i have to protect him, but i guess he wouldnt accept it xd it makes me sad he has such an awful dad, and that it will probably lead to suffering to him as he grows up, bc that kind of abuse can really fuck you up, specially when you have to act like an adult to your parents at such a young age

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: ritsu! they just click together, and i love how their relationship is depicted as super funny by other people. They are best friends first and over all, but also are in love.

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: Its more of a headcanon but with Serizawa! I think he would get protective of Shou and try to check up on him from time to time, but Shou would do the same for him bc he is worried at how his dad treated him and the thing he said the last time they saw him. But actually they are projecting their own need to be protected on the other, so it ends up being kinda messy, but then they become friends and are able to laugh and do other stuff that doesnt include talking about Shou’s dad and Claw

My unpopular opinion about this character: i refer to him as redhead goku instead of jonny test xd

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: that his feelings about his dad were explored more deeply, and also the thing i said before about Serizawa, i think that would have been spot on and could be a character development thing for both

Favorite friendship for this character: Ritsu!

My crossover ship: .... sasuke?

[tfw-no-tennis]

continuted hxh thotz

we watched more so i continue my ramblings 

so we finished the trick tower stuff and started on the stuff on the island where theyre all hunting each other....wow finally some hunting in hunter x hunter 

can i just say....fuck hisoka i hate that guyyyy oh my goddddd hes the worst. i just feel incandescent rage whenever hes on screen vhbjdshfjhbsd smarmy horny clown bitch. looooord. he invokes a similar emotion to part 1 dio tbh....like i lose my domestication when i see both those bitches 

oh god that part where hisoka had just spent like hours de-hornifying himself or w/e and he looks all crusty and dehydrated and then he spots that old guy who looks kinda ghibli and he just goes AFTER ghibli man....like hisoka literally had one of those wack ass super detailed faces and just started screaming and running at that guy...like man i wouldve died instantly on the spot. jesus 

gon remains best best perfect baby boy. every time he does something so cute and pure that my heart starts palpating, i get even more nervous for the shit hes gonna go thru someday 

gon and killua are literally soooo precious theyre just two lil boys!!! two lads!!! lad boys! augh i love how much theyre vibing all the time...like on the boat to the island when theyre like refusing to tell each other who their target is and then they both start laughing and then show each other....so precious

honestly im really enjoying how they dont really have a rivalry (yet?) - theyre not like ‘yes we are friends but we’re also COMPETING! so we cant be That nice to each other bc that wouldnt be fair! or w/e you know that typical shounen stuff. i only enjoy that sometimes and im glad its not a thing rn, and if it does become like that later i probs wont mind bc i feel like itd be done well 

so ruth and i caught on to the fact that that weird guy with the pins stuck all over himself was illuminati or w/e his name is (illumi? illumini? i forget already) but HOLY FUCK we both thought he was wearing a mask....god i wish that were the case, that face transformation shit was the WORST. sir why can you do that 

also when hisoka just watched this and was like ‘i always like seeing you do that’ or whatever god gross nasty i hate them

my take on the little we’ve seen of hisoka and illumitations relationship: theyre like the catty mean girls-types but Super Fucking Weird. idk if theyre gay togther (probably) but theyd be the epitome of a ‘is this allowed? [gestures at All That]’ couple. i had more thoughts on them but i forgt 

i find it funny that they havent shown killua like at all during this island hunting thing hvbhsdhfbjdk he probably has like 10 randos badges already. i feel like he would give gon a badge or 2 if gon needed them but that doesnt seem to be the case 

when hisoka spotted leorio and kurapika and went after them i was like [guy yelling NOOOOOOOOOOO meme] freal 

thank goodness kurapika could recognize that they would Fucking Die trying to fight hisoka, and bargained w/him instead. also seeing the flashback of leorio trying to fight hisoka was so funny. my man WHAT! were you thinking 

this is probably the stage that tonpa is getting out on and can i just say thank god i hate that guy. good riddance 

that sniper lady looked cool and im bummed illuminty took her out offscreen :( i also thought the black guy with the beehive stick thing was gonna do more but guess not

i find it funny that so many characters have these loud character designs but end up not having a lot of screentime...i feel like ive been conditioned by one piece to see an eye-catching character and mentally prepare to see a wholeass backstory lol

also. illunikn is clearly a huge freak which is probably why hisoka is willing to work w/him, but his design is weirdly cute sometimes (when hes not doing absolutely freaky shit, which....admittedly isnt often)

like the part where he transforms into his True Cat Man Form and then, without changing expression, digs a giant hole with his bare hands (with the body language of a feral person) and then gets into it to nap.....like.....bro. 

also ik illiminini is killuas brother (i think brother?) and wow that family has some strong Cat genes 

i find it interesting that hisoka has been working with illiimini this whole time, hisoka strikes me as a solo type of guy who would be all like ‘teamwork is beneath me’ and only have minions (a la dio, espec p1 dio) but he seems to have a fairly even relationship w/illuimian which is wild. i rlly wonder if thatll last or if hisoka is gonna like, murder/abandon ilubimi later bc he ‘gets in hisokas way’ or st 

i like that kurapika and leorio teamed up....married

i generally really like how the relationships between the main characters are handled, its sweet how theyre just like....generally nice to each other and stuff lol 

also oh my god i forgot that last time i hadnt seen the end of trick tower i need to talk abt that 

KILLUA MY BOY OH MY GOD....ive been waiting for this ngl. ily smug murderous catboy

i love so much how killua casually kills this ~*~scary guy~*~ and everyones like :0 but gon is just like yep thats killua! hes from a family of assassins! like the way he says it so casually and kinda cheery aw i love him. he doesnt even care that killua can murder people in 2 seconds flat, he thinks killua is AWESOME 

and oh my god i love how hard killua is trying like, all the time. he is trying his HARDEST to be AS COOL AS POSSIBLE for gon and thats adorable. its working too gon clearly thinks killua is SUPER cool 

the eternally hilarious part where kurapika asked what killuas secret tactic are re: ripping that guys heart out, and killua is just like ‘uh i just ripped it out. yknow...as one does..’ and kurapika is like wow im glad this murder catboy is on our side.. 

the psychology stuff in the trick tower was interesting as hell (catch me brushing off my psych minor like, oh yeah i know abt this stuff lol)...i like the stuff abt leorio getting discouraged/disgruntled when the majority ended up being against him a lot bc thats true!! thats how it works!! it leads to learned helplessness and stuff like that...also that animation of kurapika and leorio playing cards to explain the tough candle choice was sooo cute 

i really loved the solution to the final majority rule things....ingeniously following the rules while still managing to circumvent them in ways...love it

also gon is so perfect have i mentioned that already

im so curious whos gonna pass the hunter exam, i legit have no idea and i would find it so funny if gon becomes a hunter in the first goddamn arc hjhbdfhsdjbgk as ruth said, itd kinda be like luffy becoming pirate king in like chapter 70

i mean tbf if i had to guess id say gon passes, simply bc i cant see the story taking the time to have him do the hunter exam again in a year. also his motivation is to become a hunter in order to see what its all about bc of his dad - not JUST to become a hunter 

gons fishing rod is so cute. perfect item for a perfect boy 

his training was adorable. hes a smart lad! formidable baby 

the blooderflies were so cool and OH MY GOD how could i forget the part where gon had two blooderflies with little leashes on and had the leashes tied to one of his fingers....OOOUGHHHHGBSJFHSJBFUHEJKSDD bro my heart literally palpated like it does when my cat does something rlly cute, gon is seriously That cute and pure and good

every time hisoka is anywhere near gon i just wanna call the FBI on that clowns ass oh y god. pls leave ladboy alone....

anyways i love the main characters (HISOKA DONT INTERACT) and i cant wait to see what happens next. i might have more thoughts but coherency is not one of my strengths so bye

[robertisbisexual]

I see all these will sonny Paul stuff on your blog and have no idea what happened. What’s the story there? Who’s who? Who forgot about who? I’m sorry this is just me being so confused! X

Welcome to a crash course in gays of our lives anon [because days doesnt know what a bisexual is or a wlw tbh]

also NEVER APOLOGIZE i love talking about Paul and Will and sometimes Sonny.

So

Will is the blond man, Paul is the Asian man, and Sonny is obviously the remaining man.

Will and Sonny were the big ship back in the day and represented a lot of firsts in terms of queer rep in daytime soaps.  And for the most part they had a pretty good relationship [theres the whole Will not coming out right away and managing to knock up Gabi thing but ultimately their trio parenting is very cute and I like their family so \ o/ ]

Now Chandler [the blond man in all the gifs i reblogged] decided to leave and they recasted the character. It was... a choice that some liked and some didnt. I didnt really have strong feelings on it because I barely watched at that time and I never really cared about Wilson all that much.

But you see days is a soap that LIVES on love triangles [if you dont have some sort of relationship drama youre probably only gonna be on screen one day a week tbh] and so eventually they brought in Paul.

I am very Paul biased and I aint sorry about it.

Paul was introduced as a closeted major league baseball player in Salem for a fancy surgery and we eventually found out he was [in a retcon i believe] Sonnys first love but they broke up cuz he wouldnt come out etc etc. It caused some drama llama because days is gonna days.

Eventually Will banged Paul for the scoop story on him being a gay man and cheated on Sonny to do so and then when Sonny and Will were i think broken up and definitely not in a good place period the show decided “lets murder will and let the viewers see it from his POV”

It did not go over well. Like not even with just fandom it went over bad everywhere because Will was a legacy character people watched grow up and is a child of two of the most important families in Days history and it was... the worst. just a dumb dumb thing [side note he was kinda murdered by Ben, current days heartthrob fgdsdsgdf]

So in the wake of that Paulson rose from dead Wilson ashes. And people loved it! Like ok sure not all wilson fans loved it because shippers and monoshipping but the general audience loved the the sl and Paul.

It lasted ... years. like the build to them getting married was LONG.

And then we found out Chandler was coming back because the only thing days loves more than love triangles is bringing someone back from the dead. So surprise Ben didnt actually kill will because a magic days potion thing saved him? just made him seem dead? idk its confusing.

Ben crashed a wedding and yelled about Will being alive and even tho Wilson weren't even together when Will died and we’d spent years now watching Sonny fall big time loe in love with Paul the SECOND he heard Will was alive it was like Paul whomst?

A buncha angst happened, paul looked sad alot, and they found Will alive only Will thought he was EJ [his step dad, its a long story] and had no memories of anyone. People convinced him to move back to Salem and to try and remember and in a big ass disservice to Sonnys character the writers made him a lil turd bucket who dumps Paul and then just sorta assumed him and Will will be together.

Except amnesia Will had only one goal in his newly discovered new/oldlife: to get smashed into next year by beautiful Paul.

This man literally divorced [idk how you need to get divorced when youve been declared legally dead and Sonny was literally about to get married a few weeks prior but whatever days you do you] sonny for a CHANCE at that sweet sweet paul action.

Paul was VERY hesitent about Will because he still loved Sonny and even if Sonny didnt want to be with him he didnt want to hurt Sonny. IMO the writing for Sonny here is awful tbh and they made him both way to aggressive in his attempts to be with Will and cold in his treatment of Paul. It was like a light switch got flipped from “loves paul” to “loves will” and there was no inbetween [this is an issue they duplicated with Will months later and it was imo just as poorly done]

What came next was Paul and Will growing closer and fallin in love and I WOULD LITERALLY DIE FOR THEM but like even the most diehard horita shipper knew that eventually will x sonny would happen.

And not too long after Will and Paul shared the i love yous and basically moved in together etc etc Will started his journey of recovering his memories and Paul was CLEARLY nervous about it but supportive and helpful because hes just a soft good human tbh and Will repeatedly told him nothing would change [but we knew rip]

Except as soon as Will got his full memories back he had that light switch flip himself and literally seconds after having memories back was like “time to dump paul“

except dumbass paul with a heart of gold literally tackled someone out a window of a mansion to save Wills mom from being hurt and ended up paralyzed because apparently days only knows how to write men of color out by paralyzing them [ because they LITERALLY just did this exact exit with another character not even a year before this but i digress] so Will felt guilty and stayed with Paul, though not too guilty because he kept making out with Sonny in public places and getting reamed for it by Pauls brother Brady.

Then Paul ... figured it out? Or Will finally fessed up I cant really remember tbh I sorta blocked it out because it was ...not well written. Anyways they broke up and literally a day later Paul was like ok bye dad and brother im moving back to san fran for fancy medical treatment see ya whenever and just left lmao without even saying goodbye to anyone else.

and now we’re at the point where days clearly has no idea what to do with only 2 gay men and no triangle because all they've done since Paul left is that Sonny was blackmailed into marrying guest character Leo, also a gay man, who they thought they’d killed months before [and paul helped them cover up I believe because he's perfect] but surprise you didnt and now you gotta be married and stay apart because... reasons.

And then Leo finally left and they were free of that only now Will has a brain tumor as a side effect form the magic serum stuff that gave him his memories back but they’re only ever on like one day a week and I gotta be honest its so boring anon.

I miss Paul and also Will's personality and I wish they’d both come back.

and that’s what you missed on glee.

[acefaerie]

I think its really understandable that a lot of younger people sort of assuming that somehow not having an attraction to others is seen as a virtue especially by religious groups. 

When i was a teen my lack of interest in relationships was seen by the adults in my life that “oh she is just shy” “she’s been a good girl and focusing on school work” and tbh that was the narrative i told myself.  

except, looking back there was an underlying concern from adults that I was “missing out” on the Ideal Teen Romance TM. I got hints of it when ever I made a new male friend. “Oh he looks like he might be your type.” followed by a hopeful smile. after a while i got the “Its okay if you like girls” because i think by this time my parents had realised “she’s really not that interested in boys is she”.

but these instances were mild, my parents, specifically my mother who is “liberal” mind you, and had many close female friends who were lesbian and bi, kept out of my way. I was doing well at school, i was a “good girl”. So for me i think i get why some young people don’t understand the pressure for people to pair up because when you are in highschool if there is pressure its from peers and generally parents consider you to be “just a late bloomer”. But this is my experience, which was.. 15 years ago, and the world has changed quickly and drastically it may be different for others. It may also be that i am privileged in coming grom a generally accepting family, that is not religious, that would have accepted without question any girls I brought home (in fact i was asked if i wanted to).

My peer group generally either made jokes about my lack of interest or assumed i was gay. the general knowledge around school was i was gay, even my guy friends who never asked me also just.. assumed that was the case. I was lucky in the sense that like my mother most of my friends were either bi themselves and therefore didn’t care or pretty liberal minded. so i was cushioned... except for this one girl Tanya. She was homophobic and hated me because of it, i know this because i overheard her complaining about me one time and it generally was about how she had interpreted any causual friendly touch i had with my other friends as “creepy and weird”. I was forced to spend time with her because one of my “best” friends  was really good friends with her (who we have another story about but its only slightly related to this) and wanted us to hang out all the time. 

Tanya made my last year of highschool hell. She poisoned friends against me, and created a sort of social outcasting that left me without a support group. I was unlucky that a lot of my out bi friends who accepted me dropped out the previous year for various reasons. So i was left with the only people who sort of hung out with me being the largely straight (or closeted best friend who when she did start dating a girl, did so in secretl) acquaintances of those friends, who were easily convinced by Tanya to drop me from the group.

but here is the thing. I never called myself gay, (a am a pan/bi ace yes but at the time the only thing i ever said or did was say “Im not really interested in boys” because I really didnt know what i was) just not being interested  was enough for Tanya. 

besides  my awful experience with Tanya I get why teens think “not being interested” puts a pretty light target on your back. even if my parents were disappointed i didnt experience the “ideal teen romance TM” it wasnt a huge concern. The bullying a recieved from Tanya is also ambigious because she was exactly the kind of bigot who was bigoted against everyone who was different she was basically the epotime of what prejudice people talk about when they talk about the “prejudice tree” where a bigotted person who is biggeted against one thing is bigotted against most things that are different from them.

What was my point. Oh, yes. in highschool the main negative reactions i got were from people sharing frustration and disappointment about me dating (though the “late bloomer” thought pretty much silenced this crowd) and the more aggressive lot who were homophobic and i fit enough of the criteria for them to consider me a target.

The first negative thing, the frustration and disapointment, as an ace i think that has become more impactful the older I have got. The pressure started to hit hard in my twentie. “Something is wrong with you” reactions from people grew the more i became “clearly an adult” Friends who were fine in highschool suddenly treated me like i was a kid who didn’t know anything about anything because “i hadn’t had a relationship or sex what do i know about being an adult”. My parents, though well meaning became more and more worried abut what was wrong with me.

Omg the relief they felt when i had a relationship that lasted two weeks (where i cried the whole time and barely even kissed the person).

relationships and sex are treated by our society as a right of passage for becoming an adult. So its fine to be a late bloomer, but thats what these people think you are “a late bloomer” not fully complete yet, still growing.

my mother who was so supportive in my teens and early twenties started letting her anxiety about me leak through when i spent most of my 20s not even “just single” but actively not looking I think she even once told me she just wanted me to have the experience of a real relationship, after i had one that was online (which was like having one without having to touch a person which i enjoyed, until he came over and there was touching and i didn’t enjoy it as much anymore because both I and he forced me into sexual situations i was not ready for but had been convinced by everyone i knew that that is what you did if you were in a relationship) after him i felt physically ill if i knew a person found me attractive so actively avoided being “too sexy” so people wouldnt.

the first healthy relationship slightly romantic relationship i had was a Queer platonic one, with a woman. Everyone knew we were in love, even my professors. but it remained platonic and honestly helped free me from all the toxic stuff that happened before. Im still incredably close to her. 

at this time though I was in my mid to late thirties, and my families comments had become less “you are too picky” to “Im worried you will never find someone” “you are nearly 30″ “what if you want kids you can’t leave it too late”. 

its all small stuff but it mounts up. its mirco-aggressions that become deafening. Im childish because i don;t like sex i need to grow up, im weird im wrong im mistaken im making my parents sad, why can’t i be who they want me to be, my mother crying because she just wants me to have a special person but never understanding that my QPR WAS my special person because to her that was just a friend, people saying i don’t know what i want, people saying im a loser cos they never see me dating, people telling me they ” think being single is a sign of failure” people telling me that when they call me a prude its an insult and im weird if i dont feel bad for being a prude, people telling me i should be interested, “don’t you find him attractive”, “sex is amazing what do you mean you dont like it”,” i think you are just scared of love”, “you must be a closet lesbian”, “your just a straight faking for attention.” “why are you trying to date normal people isnt there a website for people like you?” “its not our fault there arent many of you”, “your a bad girlfriend if you don’t like kissing he/she will be hurt if you wipe the saliva away or if you say you arent attracted to them”, “you don’t understand what love is” “you are confused” “you are sick, see a doctor”, “you’re abusive,” “ you don;t know what you are talking about”, “your sick, is it a hormone deficiency” “HAH you don’t like sex just get married then you wont get any”, “how can you not feel attracted then,” your abusive if you have sex but not sexually attracted”, “you’re abusive if you dont have sex cos you are with-holding from the other person”, “it's okay if you dont want sex for now know but thats just how relationships progress”, “Why don't you like him he likes you, “” Im worried you are going to be alone for ever” 

The pressure of it used to keep me up at night where i felt i was FAILING everyone i knew because i just couldn't bring myself to feel that way about another person. I became deeply depressed. It was the main reason i considered suicide.

when i finally did enter a relationship again after two years of EVERYONE pushing for it. that pressure stopped in so far as people stopped pressuring me to be with him, but now i feel like i have to pretend to be normal so people will leave me alone, and i feel like part of me is lying to myself.

I worry about falling back into unhealthy patterns where i play the role of girlfriend just so i can stop people from knowing im weird. The only saving grace is this time my partner and I know im asexual. He doesn’t quite understand it but he respects my boundaries. still part of me feels like this relationship is a compromise. he doesn't get it completely even though he tries.  he treats me well and i love him,  Its just getting to this point my twenties were years of me ripping up my insides because of all the things society was saying to me. I felt trapped between the fear of being alone and the fear of having to force myself into a relationship again. 

So i get why young people dont get what negativity you can face for being aro/ace but thats because the virtue of being disinterested is only a virtue if its temporary. and even then don’t underestimate the power of bigots to sniff out a difference to target you for.

[preciousnerd]

A “should we know us a little better” tag
RULES: you must answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people 
Tagged by @lil-loki THE LAST: 
 1. Drink: mountain dew 
2. Phone call: my dad whoops  
3. Text message: kasey!! 
 4. Song you listened to: uuhhhh Youre Mine by Lola Marsh 5. Time you cried: idk probably like,,3 days ago? 
6. Dated someone twice: yes, with multiple people but also with the guy I’m with now!  
7. Kissed someone and regretted it: maaany times lma o 8. Been cheated on: yes multiple times  9. Lost someone special: of course, who hasn’t? 
 10. Been depressed: lmao yeah  11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: nope!  LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:
 12-14: seafoam green, pastelier blues ? and uuhh,,purple because it reminds me of kasey  IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:
 15. Made new friends: uhhh ye s I met Lana and Ty through our mutual hate of Kaleb!!  
16. Fallen out of love: nope I dont think so  
17. Laughed until you cried: probably pft 18. Found out someone was talking about you: in a bad way,,? Ig I did last night??? Idk I dont pay a lot of attention to that stuff  19. Met someone who changed you: in the past year,,no I haven’t  20. Found out who your friends are: I guess i found that out earlier than this past year so,,,no?  
21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: Cody isnt in my facebook list smh so no GENERAL: 
22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: uh,,,two of them i think?? kasey and my sister??  
23. Do you have any pets: two dogs atm but ive had more in the past  
24. Do you want to change your name: yes a million times yes
 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: uh nothing? We went to dinner downtown and ate cake and opened presents in my sisters dorm room  
26. What time did you wake up: at like 12:45 whoops  
27. What were you doing at midnight last night: uuhhh either watching youtube or playing gay wars with reb  
28. Name something you can’t wait for: for my boyfriend to not be be going through absolute hell in his life  
29. When was the last time you saw your mom: like a minute ago she walked in and talked to me about who was playing a new autistic doctor in a show  30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: i wish i could change how codys life was going rn!!!  
31. What are you listening right now: nothing other than the distant sound of The Chew playing in the living room  32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: no? i dont think so 
33. Something that is getting on your nerves: when I dont think before I act and it causes other people to get hurt  
34. Most visited Website: idk probably youtube or hangouts  35. Mole/s: u  h none  36. Mark/s: some single lonely freckles on my arms,legs,feet, and hands, a really dark birthmark on my back, a lot of scars on my legs and arms and hands, stretch marks on my back and i,,,think thats it???  37. Childhood dream: idk small me probably wanted a husband/boyfriend and to not work and be a stay at home mom because thats what i grew up thinking i needed to be but that has changed lm ao 38. Hair color: uh its naturally dark brown but rn the shaved part is brown and the long part is blonde  
39. Long or short hair: definitely short but the longer part is very floofy :> 
40. Do you have a crush on someone: yeye my boyfriend 
41. What do you like about yourself: uh?? i really like my hair?? thats the main thing ig, and my hip/collar bones are nice  42. Piercings: lmao no never again 
43. Bloodtype: who actually knows this about themselves  44. Nickname: u h idk my sister calls me Arooooon (pronounced like,,maroon), some people call me hecker, i think my new nickname for loki was turdsnot, or we could change it too rufus, and kasey and my boyfriend call me a bunch of cute things like hun or babe or whatever but idk its hard to keep track of 45. Relationship status: taken 
46. Zodiac: aries 
 47. Pronouns: they/them 48. Favorite TV Show: hmmm..probably like,,jojos even though thats an anime  
49. Tattoos: i dont have any but i want them real bad  
50. Right or left hand: left for writing and eating stuff but i use my right for some things ?  
51. Surgery: havent gone through surgery and the thought scares me  52. Piercing: smh i see you asking double questions  
53. Sport: not a sporty person but im interested in going into dance?? especially contemporary  55. Vacation: at this point its always to Texas to see my bf and best friend  56. Pair of trainers: what does this even mean?? shoes?? favorite shoes??? i really like my heels ig??? ? ?? ?  ?

MORE GENERAL: 
57. Eating: i was eating cinnamon toast crunch but i really want a rice bowl from a kobe place near me dfjfk 58. Drinking: mountain dew lmao 59. I’m about to: probably watch youtube and talk to kasey  
61. Waiting for: death?? but also my babe  62. Want: to move back to texas bluh  63. Get married: depends on who im with when i need to make that decision but im open to it and id definitely get married to cody in the future if he wanted  
64. Career: i dont really know anymore, body painter, special effects artist, journalist??artist??  something different?? idk! !  WHICH IS BETTER?: 
65. Hugs or kisses: uuhhh kisses but only with my bf  66. Lips or eyes: hmm..depends?? both are nice  67. Shorter or taller: both have their perks especially when dating either of them, like with cody he can pick me up and carry me around and i have to stand on my toes to kiss him and i love it but with shorter people they can sit in your lap and you can rest your head on theirs and bl uh idk bu t atm taller because i just want to be Held  
68. Older or younger: uuhh older cause im real young anyways but not like,,,too much older yknow,, 
70. Nice arms or nice stomach: uhh????? ?i dunno??? both are nice ig but neither are important to me?? ? 
71. Sensitive or loud: i dont know what this,,means?? like in a person??? it doesnt matter ig both have their perks and downsides to me 
72. Hook up or relationship: relationship, i cant stand the thought of hooking up with someone  
73. Troublemaker or hesitant: again, both are good and bad  HAVE YOU EVER: 
74. Kissed a stranger: not a complete stranger no but i wouldnt do it again  75. Drank hard liquor: lmao no ive only had a sip of a frozen daiquiri once  76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: i havent lost them to a point ive never found them but i slept with my glasses in my bed and couldnt find them for like an hour and cried about it after looking because i hated the feeling of not being able to see and it frustrated me a lot (this sounds like it happened when i was a small child but no it only happened like a year and a half ago)  77. Turned someone down: lmao yes ofc if i said yes to everyone who wanted to date me i would jump around so much and id hate it  78. Sex in the first date: uuhhhh questionably yes? but we had been dating for a long time before that it was just our first proper “go out and see each other” date cause we are long distance yknow  79. Broken someones heart: whoops yeah oh well  
80. Had your heart broken: yeyeye 81. Been arrested: lmAO n o 
82. Cried when someone died: yes  
83. Fallen for a friend: uuh yeah i guess thats what happened with jennie? but i wouldnt say i completely fell for her, ive only been in love once so idk, but i used to become interested in friends DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
 84. Yourself: lmao no not at all 85. Miracles: yes and no? but to keep it simple ill just stick with no  86. Love at first sight: uhhh i dont really know tbh, but i dont think i do 
87. Santa Claus: no :< 
88. Kiss in the first date: depends?? most of the time no tho 
89. Angels: dont believe in god so i dont believe in angels either whoops  OTHER:
 90. Current best friends name: kasey and cody 91. Eyecolor: brown 
92. Favorite movie(s): The Little Prince is one of my favorites, Song of the Sea, Moana, just a lot of animated kids movies are really g o od man  TAGGED: idk ig,,, @demonicfox15 ? sure you can do it kasey why not  this took me,,,so freaking long dkfmkmds

[thepalegoldmoon]

Answers

so i was asked to answer all of these so here i gooooooo!!!!~… kms… ;u;

— 1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

uhhhhmmm i dont really hold hands cause i over heat and the get clammy easily, so the last person i “held hands”/ linked arms with was actually at Anime Boston with this rad dude Jay, we were cosplaying Keith and Lance from Voltron. it was a good day, but we were tired as fuck.

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

kinda both depends on the situation and who im around tbh

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

in general or like famous??? uhhhmmm, if we’re going in general tbh me rad ass mate Jay cause why wouldnt I be looking forward to seeing this kid??? hes literally the best thing or person to see ever, duh! and if were going famous??? uhhhmmm music wise either Panic! At The Disco, TOP, orrrrr maybe a tie between some one from the Hamilton, or Heahters musicals.

4. Are you easy to get along with?

again depends on the situation and people. over all id say yeah in some way.

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

uhmmm idk because we’d both probably be shit faced and tumbling over each other screaming, incoherently and laughing our asses off. While simultaneously getting into 20 different fights over cheese, bread, and cats. Then crying about video games and anime. probably in the midst of this we’d be laughing and patting each other’s back telling each other how good of a bro the other is an how we’re gonna take over the world by the sheer brute force of dogs and cats

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

uhhhhmmm i dont really have a type but there’s a guy i like alot whos my dream guy tbh, and to me hes perfect in alot and pretty much every single way. ºuº

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

probably not but its nice to hope and dream c:

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

either rn my friend Casey cause shes in spain this week for vacation or my childhood bestfriend Liz cause her birthday just pasted on april 7th and i havent seen her in years.

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

depends on who im with and what exactly kinda stuff were talking about. but im always awkard af with everything so im always uncomftorble.

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

mi boi Jay!!~ we tend to get into deep conversation alot. i enjoy it alot tbh hahaha.

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

(when i got to this quesion)

 WE WILL BE TRASH GODS!!!~

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

UHMMM pass cause honestly the whole entirety of Heathers and Hamilton pretty much.

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

OMFG HELL YEAH I DO!!!!!!!~

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

yeah man thats always been something i believe in because i have the most terrible luck but i like to believe miracles have happened in my life.

15. What good thing happened this summer?

i started the change in my social life and i got a really rad friend through the beginning phase of it!

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

uhmmm ive only done pecks cause im  fucking looser so that was Jay, so hell yeah i would man hahaha! (hes got a kissable face its nice alright, i swear im not this fucking awkward XD) ((and bro i know youll end up reading this. i love ya man!! i hope this isnt too bad lol~))

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

fuck yeah i do bro. i wanna befriend at least one of them tbh.

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

not really cause the kid left after 5th grade and i never saw him again,

19. Do you like bubble baths?

fuck yes.

20. Do you like your neighbors?

i dont really talk to them haha.

21. What are you bad habits?

i have alot, talking to much and fighting HARD during a fight, and having the worst timing for smart ass comments, and trying to change things i cant change too much. theres more but thats a good few.

22. Where would you like to travel?

everywhere and anywhere tbh

23. Do you have trust issues?

a bit ive more developed them because of shitty people

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

either shower or the part where i come home and either draw, eat, play video games, get to text my boi, or where i get to sleep.

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

my nose, the corners of my mouth or my big toes.

26. What do you do when you wake up?

text my friend good morning or get up and play with my mouse for a few minutes

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

i enjoy my skin tone but i wish i could tan ith out burning although, ive always wanted to either be albino or see what its like to be darker.

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

either Jay, or my friend Casey

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

nope because i dont talk to them XD

30. Do you ever want to get married?

at some point maybe haha

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

almost but the sides and some of my bangs are just a teeny bit off from making it :u:

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

uhmm not really any tbh theyre all to much older than me

33. Spell your name with your chin.

alyxx/ nyxx

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

ew no but i like swimming and to go on walks for fun

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

thats hard cause i need both for background noise

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

not really, i dont think so

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

something really stupid and half the time really provocative

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

ahhhh hahaha well i dont really know because the guy im crushing on is my dream guy js. and if i were to try and describe him id butcher the amazing and astounding beauty of the real person to be honest

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

ahhhh idk, lush?? and anything with food tbh

40. What do you want to do after high school?

die, or move to salem WITCHever comes first -u0 lol (bad pun i know i know)

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

i belive in ALOT of chances tbh

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

either im tired, extremely sad/depressed, overthinking/ thinking, focusing, thinking how to reply something or im REALLY fucking pissed off at you for something.

43. Do you smile at strangers?

REALLY FUCKING AWKWARDLY AND IN REALLY FUCKING AWKWARD SITUATIONS

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

UHHHHHH BOTH!!!!!~ TF?

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

THE INPENDING FEAR AND DOOM OF CRIPPLING ANXIETY IF I MISS THE BUS OR if im hanging out wiht someone that day the motivation of not being alone in my room with myself for the whole day or so hahaha, or a con/ meet up which applies to friends.

46. What are you paranoid about?

AAAHAHAHAHAHA IS THAT EVEN A QUESTION???? fucking everything…

47. Have you ever been high?

yes

48. Have you ever been drunk?

buzzed not drunk

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

uhhh i dont think so im not really very secretive. maybe like PERSONAL shit but no

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

Grey

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

a few times

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

uhmmm either eye color and nose Physically.and personality wise i wish i wasnt so stubborn tbh.

53. Favourite makeup brand?

lush is the closest thing to makeup i use hunny

54. Favourite store?

lush

55. Favourite blog?

@thedevilandhisfiddleofgold​ c;

56. Favourite colour?

Blue

57. Favourite food?

uhmmm theres too many to list, all?? except spicy

58. Last thing you ate?

a cracker with nutella on it

59. First thing you ate this morning?

a cinnamon powdered sugar doughnut

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

nope

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

Suspending, accused of stealing shitty locker wallpaper panels. THAT I ACCTUALLY FUCKING HADNT ;U;

62. Been arrested? For what?

nope

63. Ever been in love?

YES ;-;

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

never fucking had one kiddies sorry no story time for this one

65. Are you hungry right now?

kinda i want chips

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

uhm my only tumblr friends are friends in real life so not really because how do you like someone more on tumblr than you like them in real life??? not like its impossible its just odd.

67. Facebook or Twitter?

neither tbh, i only use my facebook for my work schedule

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

TUMBLR

69. Are you watching tv right now?

yes i started 13 reasons why

70. Names of your bestfriends?

jay, casey, liz (ranked most to least interaction and tbh who ive talked to most recently, those other two loosers never text me)

71. Craving something? What?

chips, cookies, FOOD, and love, BUT MOSTLY FOOD RN

72. What colour are your towels?

we have mostly white and black towels but theyre all just multicolored

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

(im also counting my stuffed animals as pillows)

at least 11 tbh

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

(refer to last question)

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

9

75. Favourite animal?

wolf, fox, raven, snowleopard, cat, snake (i cant choose)

76. What colour is your underwear?

black like my soul bitch

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

vanilla

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

birthday cake or cotton candy/ bubblegum

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

black

80. What colour pants?

dark grey

81. Favourite tv show?

uhmmmm Voltron or steven universe

82. Favourite movie?

heathers and the crow

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

Mean Girls

84. Mean Girls or 21 Jump Street?

havent seen the second one (refer to previous question)

85. Favourite character from Mean Girls?

the lebanese chick and the gay guy that were friends with lindsay lohan’s character

86. Favourite character from Finding Nemo?

thats a hard question cause i love them all ;-;

87. First person you talked to today?

Jay (and caiden???) i sent a message to a group chat right after i woke up, i was pointed at Jay but theyre both in that chat

88. Last person you talked to today?

same chat

89. Name a person you hate?

ahha ahhahaha hahahaha, mmmmm theres alot 

90. Name a person you love?

Jay, Casey, my pets

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

better question… is there not????

92. In a fight with someone?

i dont think so but im aboutabe casue they wont give me times on if theyre coming tomorrow or not ;-;

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

2 and a pair of sweat pants i made into shorts

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

hehehe at least 6 or 7. tbh my attack on titan one has been issing for a while and it makes me sad

95. Last movie you watched?

heathers, im not saying the technical last one cause it was gross as fuck and doe not count as a movie to me

96. Favourite actress?

ehhh hellena bonham carter

97. Favourite actor?

johnny depp

98. Do you tan a lot?

not really cause i burn and im afraid of getting skin cancer

99. Have any pets?

2 guinea PIGS and a mouse

100. How are you feeling?

alright kinda missing my friends and also kind anxious

101. Do you type fast?

depends on my mood, what im typing on,  and about

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

so.. many… things…

103. Can you spell well?

fairly decently i think, average nothing over the top but i try haha

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

ehhh Liz and my friend Julia from Germany she was cool.

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

nope

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

there was a girl named shannon who was all over me and head over heels for me, she mightve been a taurus. she tried to use some serious mental shit to try and get me to stay. i told her to seek professional help and not me.

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

nope

108. What should you be doing?

a 10 page paper and finishing final fantasy, and getting more loot boxes in overwatch

109. Is something irritating you right now?

not really knowing what to do with my senior paper, shop friends, being alone, and not having enough hours in the day and always being fucking tired.

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

yes, i do right now, tbh, but its cool

111. Do you have trust issues?

this was already asked. slightly it depends on the person

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

no one, mentally and close to physiccally jay and caiden, but im always mentally crying. i dont physically cry if i do youre special, im not that soft.

113. What was your childhood nickname?

Ash

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

i was born in pittsburgh, pa. i lived in townsend, ma and i just recently moved to pepperrel, ma.

115. Do you play the Wii?

not any more

116. Are you listening to music right now?

not really

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

yes

118. Do you like Chinese food?

YAS

119. Favourite book?

how to make the perfect boy?? (its something like that) i also really enjoyed mrs. perigrines home for peculiar children.

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

im afraid of what might be in it

121. Are you mean?

i can be

122. Is cheating ever okay?

ew not wtf

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

probably not

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

kinda but only to an extent

125. Do you believe in true love?

again kinda but only to an extent tbh

126. Are you currently bored?

a bit

127. What makes you happy?

chilling with jay, playing wiht my animal or sleeping 

128. Would you change your name?

i want to, im trying to get Alyxx as my name hahah but i have a genius way to keep ASH

129. What your zodiac sign?

GEMINI BIATCH!!!!~

130. Do you like subway?

yeah its alright

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

uhhhh hahah i already dated my childhood bestfriend. Liz was chill but id kindly turn her down

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

already answered this up top, but Jay

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

hmmmm i have too many tbh, id love to put one here but i cant think of a good one atm sorry my dudes

134. Can you count to one million?

maybe but im to lazy to fam

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

hahaha ive told too many to put those down

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

CLOSED OMFG NO #TRIGGERED

137. How tall are you?

5′5.25″ ( THAT QUARTER IS IMPORTANT ;u;, believe it or not i had=ve alot of friends that are taller than me)

138. Curly or Straight hair?

wavy-ish

139. Brunette or Blonde?

i myself am a “brunette”

140. Summer or Winter?

kinda both

141. Night or Day?

ehh more night but i enjoy both

142. Favourite month?

either, October, November, December, and i actually am not a fan of my birth month may haha

143. Are you a vegetarian?

nope but ive thought about becoming one to cleanse and to get in better shape kinda reasons

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

milk and white

145. Tea or Coffee?

both

146. Was today a good day?

ehhh kinda

147. Mars or Snickers?

snickers but i wanna try a mars bar

148. What’s your favourite quote?

hahah either

“ another fucking heather! -sighs- Our love is god let’s go get a slushie!”

-JD “Heathers”

( i relate most to the heather part tbh)

  “ill hook ‘em…” “..and ill cook ‘em!”

-Roadhog and Junkrat “Overwatch”

( YEAH I KNOW IM TRASH BUT ITS A PRECIOUS QUOTE BETWEEN TO REALLY GOOD BEST MATES OKAY!!!??)

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

WHOLE HEARTEDLY, IVE SEEN THEM, IVE FELT THEM, IVE HEARD THEM, TALKED TO THEM, I RESPECT THE SHIT OUT OF THEM AND THEY ARE KINDA SLIGHTLY TERRIFYING BUT I LOVE THEM!

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“WOW MAGNUS, you’re probably thinking. That was… stupid!” 

Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard 

[togcpi]

1. You woke up naked next to the last person you texted, what would you say?it’d be weird because i’m ace but i wouldnt mind tbh

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed? we’re close friends. it was a recent kiss so?

3. If your boyfriend or girlfriend was into drugs, would you care? like heroin or meth? probably. but like pot or smth idc.

4. Is your last name longer than six letters? yes. its seven letters.

5. Was your last kiss drunk or sober? drunk

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up? every conversation i have hahahaha

7. What does your last received text say? miss u too

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed? fuck if i know

9. Where was your last kiss at? my bed

10. When is the last time you saw your sister? don’t have a sister

11. What do you drink in the morning? typically an energy drink

12. Where did you sleep last night? the extra bed

13. Do you think relationships are hard? yeah, but the right one is worth it, IF you can make it work

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you? yeah, i’d probably make myself more clear

15. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, any problems? nah, we’d have a lot of fun

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy? warm and thunderstorming

17. Do you know anyone with the same middle name as you? nah. i know a lot of people with elise as their middle name and i knew a girl who’s first name was serenity, but no one’s got the MIDDLE name serenity

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants? sweatpants

19. Do you think you will be in a relationship 3 years from now? damn hopefully

20. Does anyone like you? i think so

21. Have you ever kissed someone with a name that starts with an S? ya.

22. Is the last person you kissed gay? yes lmao

23. Is there a person you CANNOT stand? there are a couple

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo? i have two and i’m working on saving up for my third so yes

25. In the past week have you cried? i’ve gotten teary eyed but i havent cried cried in like a year lmao

26. What breed was the last dog you saw? on tv: pitbull. irl: whatever the fuck my weirdo mutt is

27. Do you dry off in the shower or out of the shower? out of

28. Have you ever kissed a football player? nah

29. Do you think you’re old? nope im a baby

30. Do you like text messaging? yes cause then i can ghost if i need to

31. What type of day are you having? it was fine

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced? i have my septum pierced and i’ve had my nostril so yes

33. Do you prefer warm or cold weather? warm

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you? oh yeah, my two best friends are both dudes

35. Would you prefer a relationship or a fling? my ace ass? take a guess.

36. Are you a simple or complicated person? depends on the day

37. What song are you listening to? i’m watching homeward bound

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it? yes, i rarely apologize without meaning it 39. Is there a girl that knows everything or almost everything about you? lmao nah.  40. What made you start liking the person you like now? idk she’s funny as hell. fucking gorgeous. she reciprocated. she’s always been too good for me, and that just made me want to be good enough for her all the more.  41. When did you last receive a text message? 11:37 pm (an hour and 13 minutes ago) 42. What is wrong with you right now? lmao i’m stuck on someone who loves me but isn’t healthy enough to be with me. it’s a fucking mess. 43. How well do you know the last female you texted? pretty well! we dated. we’ve gotten closer since we broke up. there’s a lot i don’t know, but we tell each other things we don’t tell anyone else. 44. Does anyone disgust you? lmao yah 45. Would you date someone right now if they asked? bitch yes 46. Are you in a good mood right now? not really i have a headache 47. Who was the last person you talked to in person? my brother i think 48. What color shirt are you wearing? a grey redford shirt (support your local psp by checking out our signature brand of dog food, comparable to taste of the wild and blue buffalo but at a more affordable price :~)) 49. Has someone recently told you something you didn’t want to hear? nah not really 50. Anyone you’re giving up on? i’m fucking trying 51. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? no. i’m in love with her ass.

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t? ......... 53. Do you like rain? yes 54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks? considering i’m not a controlling, abusive piece of shit, no lmao 55. Have you ever liked somebody and never told them? nah i usually end up telling the person 56. Do you like to cuddle? yes on a good day. i actually prefer to have my hair played with tho 57. Are you shy? nah 58. Do you get along with girls? yes  59. Have you dated the person you texted last? yes 60. What do you carry with you at all times? my cell phone, my wallet with my keys, my smile :) 61. If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? fuck yeah. i got loans to pay off shit 62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? with the right person, yes 63. Think back to October, were you in a relationship? oct 31, yah 64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute? FUCK yes 65. Did anything “cute” happen in the last week? i mean my cat’s been chillin and that’s always cute. love ha.

66. How old are the last three people you kissed? 18, 19, and 19

67. Would you rather pay to get your nails done or do them yourself? if i have money to spend, pay to get em done    68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print? neither the fuck 69. Do you have any stickers on your car? i had a “stop bigotry” anti trump sticker but someone stole it :(     70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne? neither     71. Blackberry, Anroid, or iPhone? iphone     72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut? a couples weeks ago    73. Do you like diet soda? FUCK no. the saccharine is just as bad for you as the sugar and it makes me jittery AND it tastes disgusting    74. What color are the walls in your room? green. ugly.    75. Are you 16 or older? yes    76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars? no    77. Do you have a job? yes      78. What are your initials? esb    79. Did you ever have braces? nah    80. Are you from the south? im from va which is technically south but i dont count it :/   

81. What does your last status on facebook say? let’s MCFREAKIN LOSE IT (about my mitski concert tickets)    82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed? kinda but not really. we talked about trying to date again but then she disappeared off the face of the planet lmao    83. Are you closer to your mom or your dad? used to be dad, but i haven’t seen him since like feburary cause he’s a mess. so its mom.    84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics? no    85. What’s the last movie you saw in theaters? get out i think. or rogue one. whatever came out later.    86. Do you smoke? socially    87. Would you rather wear heels or flip flops? flip flops     88. Is your phone touch screen? yah    89. Do you normally wear your hair straight or curly? however it combs out (wavy ish)    90. Have you ever snuck out of your house? no my mom dgaf if i leave    91. Would you rather swim in a river, lake, or pool? pool. i do not fuck with bodies of water other than the ocean, pools, and bathtubs.     92. Have you ever made out in a car? yes    93. …Had sex in a car? no    94. Are you single or in a relationship? who the fuck knows.    95. What were you doing last night at midnight? idr the fcuk     96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks? probably fourth of july last year     97. Do you like the camera on your phone? yeah its fine     98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits? no    99. Have you ever passed out from drinking? no    100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate? idts    101. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare? yeah but like a fake one. i thought it was divine conception or whatever. i’m a lesbian lmao    102. Name your favorite Kesha song: tik tok    103. Do you have any tan lines right now? nah idts    104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts? for money or laughs, yes probably  

[aqua-cultured]

I meant to do this earlier, but--! Oh, well. Do all the even numbers for that ask meme! 🙂

((i also meant to answer these earlier, so OOPS))

2. What’s going on between you and the last person you kissed?

well that was @prettyflyforabriguy​ and we’re dating so thats cute

4. Is your last name longer than six letters?

it is EXACTLY 6 letters (so technically no)

6. Have you ever wanted to have someone but you messed it up?

this is odd phrasing, but i guess yeah? just didn’t time it right, but its ok!! its honestly probably better for our friendship that nothing happened

8. How many times have you kissed the last person you kissed?

well i lost track but i’m gonna go with a Lot (LDRs you take the opportunity when you can)

10. When is the last time you saw your sister?

oh jeez this is an awkward one

I have a vague memory that im not really sure if its real or something my 5-year-old mind made up, but i think i escaped from my dad and burst into the funeral room where my mom was, and i think she was holding her

12. Where did you sleep last night?

my own bed

14. If you could go back and change something in the past 5 months, would you?

id have woken up earlier last week so i wouldnt have missed my fuckin flight

16. Would you rather it be sunny or rainy?

i like a cool sunny of like 70 degrees (i love thunderstorms if im like, doing things with friends or a s/o or something, and its cozy, but i get depressed easily if alone)

18. Are you wearing jeans,sweatpants,or pajama pants?

lol lifes too short to be wearing pants

20. Does anyone like you?

well i sure hope my boyfriend does :p

22. Is the last person you kissed gay?

hella

(i mean, pan technically)

24. Have you ever considered getting a tattoo?

if they ever figure out how to do chromatophore tattoos, you bet your ass ill get over the pain and get an octopus on my shoulder

26. What breed was the last dog you saw?

oh fuck i dont remember, mutt most likely

28. Have you ever kissed a football player?

dont believe i have

30. Do you like text messaging?

yeah

32. Have you ever thought about getting your nose pierced?

I mean i’ve thought about it, but i think if im gonna get any non-ear piercings itll probably be snake bites

34. Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?

(ignoring the poor wording buttt) yeah, i have a lot of guy friends who are really important in my life, like jonny, ben, dalen, and special mention for brian

36. Are you a simple or complicated person?

i dont know if anyone can truly be called “simple” in that sense (so complicated i guess)

38. When you say you’re sorry do you mean it?

i’d say the majority of the time, if im actually apologizing im most likely being sincere about it (if im not i usually just dont end up apologizing)

40. What made you start liking the person you like now?

when brian and i started watching star together are we just casually flirted and hung out and it was really nice 😊

42. What is wrong with you right now?

i am perfect fek u

(no but really im p stressed atm because taxes and trump and also bleeding soyeah)

44. Does anyone disgust you?

our president, his vice, his cabinet, confederates,,,

46. Are you in a good mood right now?

yeh :) skyping the cutie

48. What color shirt are you wearing?

lifes too short to be wearing a shirt

((if you are wondering what i AM wearing, its underwear and a blanket wrapped on my shoulders))

50. Anyone you’re giving up on?

not at the moment?

52. Have you ever thought about giving up on someone but couldn’t?

????????????/ i dont knowwwwwwwww what this is asking enough to really answer

54. Do you care if your boyfriend/girlfriend drinks?

i mean i just want him to be safe about it, otherwise i really dont care/not for me to say/hes his own person

56. Do you like to cuddle?

FUCK YES I DO

58. Do you get along with girls?

i mean, girls are people, so i get along with certain girls more than others, because, ya know, thats how social interactions work

60. What do you carry with you at all times?

I usually have some kind of purse on me at all times, and more often than not my little pink pocket knife is in there

62. Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months?

yes?? ((i mean i never go into a relationship hoping/planning on it to end)

64. The person you like kisses you on the forehead, do you find this cute?

mmmmmm, yeh

66. How old are the last three people you kissed?

21, 21, 23

68. Which do you like better- Zebra print or leopard print?    

really not a fan of animal prints at all so i cant really decide

70. Would you rather listen to Luke Bryan or Lil Wayne?    

i dont listen to enough of either to have a preference tbh

72. When’s the last time you had pizza from Pizza Hut?    

like february probably? sometime in this 2017

74. What color are the walls in your room?    

Apartment Issued Beige

76. Do you watch Pretty Little Liars?    

naw. tried reading it once, never really got into it

78. What are your initials?    

MCL (or SCL if youre going by nickname)

80. Are you from the south?    

well i was born in PA, but we moved to nc when i was like 1, so technically no but i do say peCAN instead of peCAHN and i sometimes get a southern accent going when im upset

82. Do you still talk to the first person you ever kissed?    

I wouldnt say we’re on bad terms or anything, but not really no

84. Have you ever done cheerleading or gymnastics?    

i did gymnastics as a small one (if i had stuck with it id probably be pretty good, i have the right form for it)

86. Do you smoke?    

nope

88. Is your phone touch screen?    

yeah

90. Have you ever snuck out of your house?    

no but last week i bought a plane ticket and went to new york without telling my parents about it, so that was an adrenaline rush for my overprotected ass

92. Have you ever made out in a car?    

i mean i’ve kissed in a car, but i wouldnt say ive made out in one

not that i wouldnt be down for it tho

94. Are you single or in a relationship? 

i am happily taken :D

96. When’s the last time you saw fireworks?    

january 1st probably

98. Have you ever had a friend with benefits?    

i’ve had friends with cuddle benefits, but thats about the extent of it

100. Are you friends with people on facebook that you actually hate?    

yeah, several high school dildos whos page i go to whenever im feeling particularly masochistic

102. Name your favorite Kesha song:    

timber is just so catchy... (though i only really like keshas parts in it)

104. Would you ever wear cowboy boots with shorts?    

that would require me to wear cowboy boots (so no, though i will wear other boots with shorts)