#im still on my break trying 2 improve and plan things out. considering switching to writing

[alwayscraftynight]

[wizardingbias]

HP!headcanon - NCT Yuta

 || WIZARDINGBIAS - where your fave bands live in hakho’s hogwarts au ||

Character Headcanons at Hogwarts ↳ NCT Yuta // Yuta Nakamoto // Slytherin

fuck now we’re doing my bias wrecker hell no buckle up errbody this abt to be a wild ass ride

now that’s a long ass ride

Yuta is a Sly-therin

this cunning ass motherfucker needs to calm tf down

this is probably gonna be long af

more under the cut <3

so in my au,

Yuta doesn’t actually go to Hogwarts during the first year 

i haven’t planned out exactly how his life bf Hogwarts was like but let’s roll with it

so the reason why he switches school is pretty cool actually

like his parents had to pull him out of Mahoutokoro bc of a freaky murder case

or maybe cool is the wrong word

whatever

his parents are top notch investigators and they settle in London and send yuta to hogwarts

and yuta is a lil shit who wants to know everything but his parents refuse to tell him details

so he tries to go sherlock on the case

and surprisingly finds a lot of things

like it’s his free time project

he has a notebook with all his notes and red string and all that

yknow what im talking abt

so year 2

it starts with him going straight into the headmistresses’ office to get sorted

and he doesn’t have a clue what the fuck slytherin is

but he accepts it and his tie turns a bright shade of green

which the headmistress says is a sign

the force is strong in this one

the slytherin force

and lil 12 y/o yuta has a big smiley face as he sits down at the slytherin table and of course he’s the type to spark up a conversation immediately

he’ll probably be so curious and ask the people at the table what’s happening up front where the sorting ceremony begins

and this older slytherin thinks he’s adorable with his too-big-smile and wide, curious eyes and indulges lil yuta even though they’re supposed to be quiet

but sorting ceremonies can take a long ass time

and anyone can see that yuta is the fidgety type

but when the feast suddenly appears

yuta’s all

*too-big-smiley-face*

and absolutely fascinated by everything

what the fuck is shepards pie

year 2 is also the year he meets his best friend forever

this adorable hufflepuff named taeyong who is way too shy and intimidating looking for his own good, except, yuta sees right through that when the little hufflepuff boy helps him out in Charms class, showing yuta how to properly flick his wand and fix his pronunciation

and yuta thinks its so cute how this lil boy who is always quiet and always by himself has strolled over to this side of the classroom to help out yuta who is the only one struggling

so kind

so soft

cue *healing smile*

and taeyong and yuta become best friends and have sleepovers bc taeyong gets nightmares and misses his dad a lot so yuta indulges the technically older boy with late night cuddles to comfort him 

this part always gets me ffs

This is also the year Yuta finds out there’s an older Gryffindor that also is of japanese herritage

and Yuta never says shit like this but sometimes he misses the japanese culture and just talking in japanese bc english gets really hard sometimes like he can’t 100% express everything he wants to say so hell yea he’s gonna look for this gryffindor

the gryffindor is hansol

who is btw like the most beautiful creature yuta has ever seen

and the first time lil yuta spots this boy his cheeks flush a very distinct red and he automatically feels drawn to him

Hansol is flying on his really flashy looking broomstick one weekend, and yuta just kinda stumbles upon him

this is when Yuta is fully introduced to the art that is quidditch and he absolutely falls in love with the sport, like enough to try out for the slytherin team two weeks after Hansol’s taught him the basics

and he’s fucking good too

really fast

like the wind

but he’s too small and young to actually be on the team but the slytherin captain doesn’t want to let him go so he’s on the reserve bench this year but he still works so hard to improve and oh my god hansol is so proud even though he doesn’t say anything, he just smiles and goes to the slytherin practices to watch yuta but yuta doesn’t know that until he spots the gryffindor waiting for him outside of the locker rooms and

ahhhhhhhhhhh

Year 3 is when things start tho

Yuta finally makes the team as one of the three main chasers

even though everyone is worried that he wont be able to do it bc Yuta is gd smol 

him and taeyong are like the smol smol in their batch

but yuta is strong af and learns really quick and he’s fucking lightning fast on the field why isn’t he a seeker????

bc he has shitty eyesight thats why

he doesn’t like wearing his glasses but he kinda has to

especially when he’s studying or in class

t-yong thinks its really cute

whatever

and this is also the year he’s picking up his course work, like stuff is actually making sense

year two was filled with getting used to the english equivalent to everything and trying to catch up on first year stuff and also tryna figure out where everything is

why doesn’t hogwarts have a map???

thank god for taeyong

the lil hufflepuff will always pick him up if he’s lost

also thank god they have so many classes together

but yuta likes potions the most, mostly bc he’s weirdly good at it

except for that one time he was freaking out about his first ever seasoned game and nearly melted the table

be careful when brewing kids

Yuta clings to Hansol a lot this year

especially because they both like quidditch and it’s practically their lives

and hansol, in his ever so awkward and quiet way, teaches Yuta about quidditch history and secrets and about this one story of a couple that met on the field, both being seekers for rival teams, and fall in love as they’re both chasing the snitch, and they forget about the game completely and spend so much time giggling and messing with each other that the game takes more than 7 hours to complete, and Yuta is mesmerised by this cute ass love story

“It’s actually my parents’ love story”

“no way”

“yeah. they’re now considered the quidditch couple of the century.”

“that is disgusting. i love it,” Yuta gushes

and also, whenever Yuta is feeling stressed AF or worried about things and taeyong is busy doing whatever the fuck he does

(that boy is sometimes a fucking mystery, but yuta thinks he’s probably just stealing food from the kitchens)

((in reality, taeyong is actually being taught how to bake and cook by the house elves bc he’s having so much fun learning abt recipes and stuff))

Yuta looks for Hansol and gushes to him about his worries, and when it gets too much to contain and his tongue stumbles over the english, yuta switches to japanese without a problem bc Hansol can understand 100% of everything he’s complaining about even though he offers his advice in english instead but it’s such a relief and yuta is so thankful

eventually, towards the end of year 3, Yuta’s crush on Hansol becomes almost too much

but he doesn’t tell anyone about it

not even his bff taeyong who is the first to know about everything

bc he’s afraid of his feelings

like ‘what the fuck is this erratic heartbeat every I see hansol?’

and Yuta starts to think that his mind is playing tricks on his but he swears to god Hansol is inching closer and closer to him every time they hang out

One day

after countless of speculations and confusion from yuta’s side

Hansol casually grabs onto Yuta’s hand as they’re walking down a hallway

and hansol just continues on with their conversation like nothing different has happened

but yuta is freaaaaking ouuut 

he keeps looking up between hansol’s beautiful face and their interlocked hands

and fuck his hands are getting sweaty but hansol doesn’t pull away and what does this meaaaaannnnnn?????

In the summer between year 3 and 4

Hansol invites yuta to his place and it’s so nice

and they spend the summer back and forth at hansol’s and yuta’s house

and yuta’s mom absolutely adores hansol so much and feeds him cake and traditional japanese food bc ‘you’re too skinny, hansol-kun’ 

Yuta can’t help but smile at Hansol’s overly puffy cheeks as his mother feeds him copious amounts

it’s adorable

his heart

my heart

Year 4

yuta is greeted with his first ever kiss

closed lipped and chaste and so incredibly quick

it’s after Yuta learns how to ride his broomstick standing up

something hansol has been trying to teach him all summer

and hansol kinda just

accidentally kisses him

bc he’s so proud

and Yuta’s eyes get soooooo big

what just happened

and then hansol is so cute and flustered and his entire face is just beet red and “i’m so sorry, i didn’t mean to do tha-”

but Yuta interrupts hansol with another chaste kiss, standing on his tippy toes bc hansol is 500 metres taller than him

and it’s so cute how hansol turns even redder

and this is the start of their relationship and it’s adorable and yuta is so happy

so happy that sometimes, in the middle of the night, Yuta will curl into a ball in his bed bc the feels are too much and he can’t sleep bc Hansol’s the type to subtly give his robes to yuta bc yuta’s the type to be freezing and refuse to bring his own robes

but yuta is good at communicating or breaking the ice

so he doesn’t really tell anyone that they’re together

and both hansol and yuta aren’t super into skinship

and taeyong is a fucking oblivious little shit so he doesn’t figure it out

if anyone wants i can make a post going into depth on yusol’s relationship lol

but one day when t-yong and yuta are studying divinations, TY finds something odd in the bottom of yuta’s teacup, but yuta fucking sucks ass at divinations so he doesn’t know what the hell it means

it’s freaky tho how t-yong all of a sudden gets really protective and careful around yuta

“Bro.”

“What?”

“Stop doing that.”

“Doing what?”

“Treating me like I’m about to die.”

“You’re not dying, Yuta. Geeze.”

“If I was, you should be worried abt yourself.”

“Why?”

“Bc I’m dragging you into the afterlife with me.”

“Bro.”

but it makes sense that t-yongie is so protective and walking on eggshells around yuta bc by the end of this year, Hansol has announced that he’s moving to Mahoutokoro to play professionally for Japan

and Yuta has no idea what to think

bc he understands quidditch is so incredibly important for Hansol, that it his life

Yuta also loves quidditch, he totally gets it

but his heart hurts so much

he feels betrayed

but he also feels like he shouldn’t feel betrayed

and eventually he snaps at Hansol, yelling and crying like a mess bc he loves hansol so much, and he wants to be loved just as much back and why isn’t hansol picking yuta instead of quidditch? 

they end on extremely bad terms

Yuta doesn’t even see Hansol off on the last day of school

he refuses to

because yuta doesn’t cry in public

ever

but if he were to see Hansol one last time he would cry

san(g) namja yuta des

but thank fuck t-yong is there for him to take yuta’s mind off of the fact that his first love just left him to pursue his dreams 

Yuta throws himself into quidditch practice, school work, hanging out with t-yong and taeil and he masks all the pain he feels with his too-big-smile but it’s not quite as wide as it used to

and taeyong still doesn’t know they were together, but he’s such a softy for his friends and yuta takes 100000% advantage of that

YEAR 5

is suCH A BETTTER YEAR LEMME TELL YOU

Yuta is still heartbroken but most of it is settled over the summer so fuck that and fuck hansol let’s get back to business

his snarky comments are fucking back

and his healing smile is back

thank fuck

buT GUESS WHAT PEOPLE

Yuta’s appointed fucking captain of the Slytherin Quidditch team

aye aye captain

and he’s so happy he cries into Taeyong’s shoulder during their sleepover

he works hard AF for the team 

#1 priority

and then he meets this uberly adorable boy named Sicheng

and fuck Sicheng is perfect and cuddly

even more than t-yong and TY is the resident smol bean at the school

but Sicheng takes the cake

my heart for yuwin is srs

and they gET TOgethER FFS YUTAAAAA WINWINNNNNN

THE CUTEST COUPLE

SO MUCH MORE OPEN AND SKINSHIPPY

AND YUTA LOVES IT

WINWIN ALSO LIKES QUIDDITCH

LOVES FOOD

AND YUTA TEACHES HIM SO MUCH ENGLISH AND EVEN JAPANESE

THEY’RE MARRIED I SWEAR

and yuta’s smile is somehow the biggest it has ever been

and t-yongie is so happy for the couple

he kinda likes thirdwheeling them a lot

like he genuinely likes it

and yuta’s like

“it’s okay to share, ik he’s irresistible, but he’s mine after 7pm”

fuck my heart is not okay i didn’t even realise how hard i ship this fuck

YEar 6 

not much actually happens this year

except

the murder case suddenly has a lead

it’s been fucking years wtf parents

and Yuta’s parents have to move to Chile to go after this murderer

“okay????? what do you want me to do???? I aint leaving Hogwarts”

cuz he doesn’t wanna leave Sicheng like Hansol left him

even though Yuta really wants in on the case and get info and try to solve it for himself

but he chooses friends over his own ambitions

“you’re a total hufflepuff”

“shut the fuck up, taeyong”

but this year turns out to be awesome

bc he leads his quidditch team to victory

and the entire team carries him on their shoulders

THEY JUST WON THE FUCKING HOUSECUP

this time yuta cries in front of every one

and taeyong manages to take a picture

(it’s used a blackmail for literally years bc fuck yuta is an ugly crier no wonder he never cries in front of anyone)

and Sicheng is so happy for Yuta even though he’s sulking about his own team’s loss

it’s okay bc Yuta takes Sicheng out for ice cream and everything is so good

sicheng is the cutest

eating his ice cream with his lil tongue licks

like a lil cat

my heartttrttttttttt

im not even a sicheng stan but akjfigelhgskurtg

and then year 7 turns out to be pretty fucking good too

1) Taeyong doesn’t try to snatch sicheng for himself bc now there’s a lil bebe gryffindor named jaehyun that he’s got together with

but only because Yuta told jaehyun about TY’s huge ass crush but his best friend is just such a shy lil boi he needs to tell Jaehyun

bc a friend named johnny accidentally told him during one of the illegal underground parties that jaehyun thought TY was hella hot

so basically

T-yong owes his entire love life to Yuta

*pat on the back*

*healing smile*

2) byE BYE VIRGINITY

3) he nails his potions N.E.W.T.’s

4) he doesn’t fail anything else

even divinations which is a fucking hell why did he even pick to continue this subject wtf yuta

and he doesn’t fail Charms 

bc he’s charming af

but it’s so sad how this is the last year he gets to coach his team, and he works 100% harder to get strategies and practices done and everyone of his team members fucking love and hate him so much bc it’s 2x as much practice but it’s also a lot of fun games and stuff

curtesy of taeyong’s planning

honestly where would yuta be without taeyong?

BUT THEY WIN THE THE SEASON AGAIN SO SUCK IT

And then graduation comes and Yuta breaks down for the second time in public

but it’s just because he suddenly realises, in the middle of taeyong’s rockstar dad’s song, that he’s leaving the best place on earth, thank god for that one murderer that let him move to scotland, thank you to taeyong who is the bestest friend he could’ve ever gotten even though yuta never tells t-yong he loves him, and thank god for sicheng and his beautiful softness, he is the best thing (besides t-yongie) to happen to yuta, and thank you to his teammates for trusting him, he wishes them all the best, and thank you to himself bc he’s been a fucking amazing person

but he doesn’t say any of this to anyone bc san(g) namja ffs!!!!

but he cries so much

so so so much

tbh same yuta

all he needs to figure out now is what he’s gonna do after graduation

but then again, that offer to play professional quidditch for England doesn’t sound too bad tbh

but who knows wtf the future holds

this is a little too close to home omfg TT

a/n: okay i’m done. i need to lie down. feel free to ask me for more headcanons :) I like making these lol (even though im supposedly swamped with shit to do)

↳ Yuta’s official profile (coming soon)

Taeil | Hansol | Johnny | Taeyong | Yuta | Doyoung | Ten | Jaehyun | Winwin | Mark | Haechan (will update over time)

[giveuselife-blog]

Top Tips for Working at Home and Staying Efficient

New Post has been published on https://giveuselife.org/top-tips-for-working-at-home-and-staying-efficient/

Top Tips for Working at Home and Staying Efficient

Operating at Home (to your personal business) has outstanding advantages – no lengthy trip within the rush hour, no need to ask permission to head the Dentist or to depart early to pick out the kids up from school. However, it can also convey a whole draft of troubles too – in particular, if you are new to Operating at Domestic. Dropping the structure furnished through a workplace putting can be very unsettling for a few. problems may additionally consist of things like, In no way Truly Switching Off! Or other people now not respecting your time. Or simply now not getting organized enough to Simply get whatever executed!!

So, when Operating at Home, how can we remain Efficient – and hold a piece-existence stability?

I’ve compiled a listing of Recommendations for Operating at Domestic that I have discovered beneficial. (by using the manner, I’ve worked from Home now for over eleven years – and that I would not move again to an office for anything! However, I still find those Recommendations extremely useful to remind myself what I have to be doing once in a while!)

Hints for Working at Home: 1. Define your Work Area.

You want to have a place of the job – and that is not sitting on the couch in the front of the Tv! if you do not have a separate observe (that is the precise choice) then try placing yourself up on a table inside the spare bedroom or eating room. You want a Space wherein you may close the door and feel like you are ‘at Work’ and consequently experience like you’ve got ‘finished Paintings’ while you move out of that Area on the quiet of your day. Psychologically that is important as it changes your nation of mind from “at Home” to “at Paintings”. Learn to Awareness. Being capable of shutting the door on your separate Space is vital – if the door is open it could sign to your own family that you are to be had to chat (or play!)

Anyplace your workspace is, ensure you maintain it tidy – the old adage about a tidy table equalling tidy thoughts is authentic! The tidier and greater organized your workspace, the greater Productive you will be. additionally, ensure you’ve got the gadget you want – in particular, ensure you have got a comfy chair with the again guide.

Recommendations for Working at Home: 2. Set Floor Policies/tips with Those Around You

Set your Operating hours (see tip four) and ensure that your friends and own family are privy to this and appreciate it. You aren’t to be had for coffee, for long lunches or for play! Your buddies and family possibly would not disturb you at an office with questions that could effortlessly wait till you get Home – But if Home is your office they will now not display the same restraint. A number of buddies and family can even suppose that as you work at home you are capable of stop for coffee or an extended lunch at a moments word! make sure that everyone knows that interruptions are for pressing subjects most effective.

Recommendations for Running at Home: three. Put together for Paintings – Physically and Mentally

Have breakfast, take a bath and dress. You do not must wear a healthy – But don’t live in your pajamas! Getting dressed first component in the morning prepares you for Work – it receives your mindset in the right area.

don’t flip the laptop on just to check emails as you walk past the study first thing in the morning (I am responsible for this one!) All of sudden you recognize it’s lunchtime and you’re still to your PJs with a stinking headache cos you have not had breakfast (not to mention a bath!)

make certain you’re inside the proper thoughts set for the day. Begin the day nicely

Recommendations for Running at Home: four. Set Normal Hours – and Stick with Them

Again of Working at Domestic is which you do not ought to Paintings 9-5 if you don’t need to. I tend to Paintings from nine.30-three.00 (with a spoil for lunch) and then 7.30-eight.30 in the evening (after my Son is in bed). Consider what works for you. You may need to Paintings early mornings or evenings too in shape Round your circle of relatives lifestyles or to talk with colleagues in other time zones.

Anything hours you decide – Keep on with them! (you are allowed a few leeway – However, do not let Paintings run your lifestyles).

I think this is one of the hardest ‘Guidelines’ when Working from Home – it is so easy to Genuinely By no means switch off. However, a healthy Work-lifestyles stability is crucial – even in case you do business from home.

Guidelines for Running at Home: 5. do not assume you want an Immaculate House!

do not spend extra time on house responsibilities than on Running! A piece of mild housekeeping in your ‘lunch hour’ is suitable, as is popping the abnormal load of washing on, But definitely, while you are at Paintings, you are at Work – even in case you are Operating at Home. If you could come up with the money for to get a purifier and you’ll have one in case you have been Running a ‘right activity’ in an office – still get one. Please do not assume you have to be Superwoman (or Superman) and do all of it yourself due to the fact other humans think you have lots greater time due to the fact you make money working from home!!

in case you take your Work severely, in particular when you have just started out a brand new commercial enterprise at Home, then you definitely want to put the hours into your Work – now not into cleansing the House!! Schedule non-Paintings time for family chores and get the relaxation of the family to do their share. It is critical that you don’t take on every household job just because you work from home – The ones Around you need to admire the reality that despite the fact that you’re at Home you’ve got critical Paintings to do during your scheduled hours.

Pointers for Running at Domestic: 6. Restrict Distractions

In case your Work allows- flip OFF the telephone so you can concentrate and get on without distraction. simplest test your email at certain instances of the day. it is so clean to get distracted via emails that you think need to reply to At once! in case you do that, you’ll By no means get any duties finished!

turn OFF your Skype, Facebook, Twitter etc even as you’re Operating. check your IM at sure times and most effective cross on Fb to your damage instances. I know that Operating from Domestic can be lonely so the use of Social Media can sense like your lifeline to the outside world – But this may fast take over your day and break your productivity.

Hints for Operating at Home: 7. Make an Each day TO DO listing

Making lists can honestly assist you to Attention and stop you procrastinating – which for a few purpose we seem to do greater of when we are sat at Domestic on our own!! I do a weekly list of tasks after which smash that down into Daily duties. I use the Steven Covey technique to Time Management as a good deal as possible and the important thing for me is to Focus on my

Large ROCKS. do not just pick the smooth responsibilities – spend fine time for your Massive Rocks and your business will fly!

if you surely do conflict to Attention (in spite of a to-do list) attempt making plans out what you’ll do each hour which must assist you to live Efficiently!

Guidelines for Running at Domestic: eight. Create Small Closing dates

This follows on from tip 7 – and can also assist forestall the dreaded procrastination! when you Start the day it looks as if you have plenty of time and it may be clean to get sidetracked by means of the Television or the cell phone. Set objectives for completing portions of labor – e.G. “I will finish scripting this weblog by way of 11 am”. “I will entire this advertising and marketing hobby by 1.00”. This allows to break up your day and hold you focussed on the challenge.

Suggestions for Operating at Home: nine. do not simply Take a Time off due to the fact things get hard!

don’t just take a Time off because you do not sense like Working nowadays!! if you are having a difficult day – persevere – do a little Paintings anyway! in case you are unwell, be sick – take a proper Day without work to get higher. in case you organize a holiday Time without work it’s great – But do not just decide you can’t be afflicted to Paintings these days – that is a slippery slope to go down while Suddenly you Never gain anything!

Hints for Working at Domestic: 10. Take Scheduled Breaks

There are various methods to try this – relying on your Running style. But provide your self-breaks. some human beings locate it beneficial to take a fifteen-minute spoil for each hour labored. Or maybe you will favor taking a fifteen-minute run two times a day. In addition to small breaks take a right lunch damage. Eat something healthy – Away from YOUR desk! Depart the House and get a few clean air – it’ll definitely make you a lot more Productive when you get again on your desk. simply sitting in front of your PC without breaks will just result in ‘diminishing returns’. You suspect you’re Running sincerely tough – however, the results just aren’t that exceptional!!

Tips for Running at Home: eleven. end whilst you end

know whilst to prevent Operating! just due to the fact you are Running at Domestic does not imply which you should be Working All the TIME that you are at Domestic! Depart Work at the stop of the day.

Susan Seaburg (Subject Improvement Supervisor for Hewlett Packard) gives her to enter on Running at Domestic in an interview with Santa Clara University:

“The best news is that now you could Work everywhere – the terrible news is that now you could Paintings anywhere.”

The majority cross Home to escape from Paintings – you don’t have that choice. So be careful which you still maintain a very good Work-existence stability.

Tips for Operating at Home: 12. Watch your Mood

The whole lot you pay attention to will have an effect on your Temper – or distract you from the assignment. In my opinion, I hate Running in silence so if I actually need to concentrate I put on a few non-intrusive song just to create background noise! (My husband is the alternative – he has to Paintings in entire silence so we use separate rooms if he is Operating at Domestic too!) If I am now not having to concentrate too difficult I pay attention to instructional audios – as I a member of the Empower Network Inner Circle I’ve access to a whole variety of recordings by humans on the very Pinnacle of internet advertising – so I pay attention to The ones every day. those also can be exceptional to lift your Mood if you are feeling A bit low or unfocused. find what works for you and ensure you surround yourself with matters with the intention to provide you with the great frame of mind for Something you are doing.

Tips for Operating at Domestic: 13. Are searching for out possibilities to talk with different human beings!

in case you recognize you can not be too distracted, cross and Paintings in a café, in or library every now and then as this will simply give you an alternate from being at Home all day. Most espresso stores have unfastened wifi these days in case you want to be on the internet.

Attend some training courses or nearby networking occasions to preserve a few human touch – and likely choose up some enterprise too!

Skype or Facebook chat rooms also can be an amazing manner to talk with the outside world. I exploit these methods a lot as my crew and co-workers are all around the world. But as referred to in advance, don’t get sucked into spending hours an afternoon chatting on-line and no longer getting something else completed.

Make the odd phone name too – do not simply use email. It is good for your sanity to Truly talking to a person from time to time!

And ultimate However now not Least –

Tips for Working at Home: 14. Be Thankful!!

Be Thankful that you may do business from home. which you do not need to do the lousy commute, that you could be Domestic when the kids get in from faculty, that you aren’t stuck in a windowless office or shared cubicle!! Certainly, BE Efficient so you can preserve Working at Home!

Desire you found my Top Tips for Running at Domestic useful. if you need to see how I make cash Operating at Home every day – please check my weblog website indexed under.

[mental-health-advice]

Submission from Bluewall

hi, pls tag as bluewall. I noticed that my temperament/mood varies between being really pumped up and restless, down, and lacking concentration, and somewhat neutral. I daydream way too much - basically all the time, no matter what i’m doing. I also love things involved with fiction like video games, reading etc, so this contributes. I get so attached to this stuff, and it develops my inner world as well. I feel like I live in my head. I get restless and pumped up and can’t sit still. (p1)

bluewall 2. I can’t concentrate on anything and lost the care and motivation for school work. Sometimes I fluctuate into being a bit moody and frustrated, I think this comes from feeling like I’ll never look like or be like the person I really want, or do/succeed in what I really want to. I feel hopeless to try anything new, bcs I’m afraid of failure and can’t stand embarassment. I also can’t focus on a single hobby for long, I get impatient and want to move on. An example is painting.

bluewall 3. I’ve always wanted to be good at it. I suck, but anyway, when I try painting I lose interest after a while or can’t finish the painting because I’ve lost focus. I thought the restless fazes and mood things were linked with hormones and possibly my period influences it, but i realised i’ve always had this regardless. I dont care about anything and struggle to. I just escape in my head. Im not ambitious or competitive and not excited about going to study in london next year.

bluewall 4. I know other people my age are really excited and interested in university but i seem not to be? like its ‘not for me’, like I want my life to go another path but i’m not sure which one and I think i’m being unrealistic. I don’t get why I’m not at the same level as others, everyone seems to be far ahead in terms of confidence etc. Excited for the future, carefree. I’m not. I should be, and i feel guilty, but i’m not. I feel like I’m just ticking a box. THanks for listening.

Hey Bluewall,

My partner struggles with this to some extent, so hopefully I've got some advice that can help you out! At least for him, his difficulty focusing comes from struggling with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD). This is by no means to say that you have ADD, or that what you're struggling with is because of that. We aren't mental health professionals here at MHA, so we can't give any diagnoses.

However, I can explain what ADD is. The biggest aspect of it is an inability to focus, which can lead to difficulty finishing tasks and sometimes being slow to respond.

Some common symptoms include:

Getting distracted easily

Being forgetful, even with things you do often

Trouble paying attention to details

Trouble staying focused on tasks

Difficulty staying organized

Dislikes things that require long periods of mental focus

If you want to see if you struggle with it, or want help with trying to figure out why you are experiencing this inability to focus, I would strongly recommend you see a mental health professional. You could also consider seeing a career or school counselor to see if your detachment is normal and you just haven't found what you want to do, or if there is something else going on.

The way that my partner works on this is that he has a couple of hobbies that he likes to switch between. When he gets bored with one, he'll switch to another one. Sometimes, he can switch back to something he was working on previously if he gives it enough time.

Another thing he does is that he forces himself to keep working on things he knows he needs to do. He knows he has to go to work at certain times of day every week, and sometimes he really doesn't want to or he can't focus on doing so. But he makes himself go in anyway, and the task gets done.

I know this is a novel concept for a lot of people, but having gone through college myself I can say with a surety that it isn't for everyone. There are several fields that don't require a degree, and some that actually won't at all be helped by having one. On the flip side, there are several career paths that greatly benefit from a college degree, such as going on to become a doctor, professor, or lawyer. But if you aren't sure what you want to do, it might be better for you to plan on not going to college, at least not right away. I don't know what country you are in, but outside the U.S., it's actually fairly common for people to take a year off (or a gap year) to try to figure out what they want to do with their life. They've also been in school for the past 12 years, and their brains need a break to recover.

As far as being who you want to be, I can tell you that becoming your ideal image is very difficult. However, becoming a certain kind of person doesn't just happen overnight. You have to work hard and consistently to improve the parts of you that need work. I know that's hard to do, especially when you have trouble keeping focus on other things. But if you can figure out a way to work on your focus issues, I know you can start to work on improving yourself and get closer to the person you want to be.

Something my therapist told me was that I often tend to self reject. I don't give other people the change to reject me, because I assure myself that they are going to do it, so I don't even try. He told me that even though it doesn't seem like it, this is its own kind of failure. Sure, you might fail if you try to do something. But if you talk yourself out of it before you even try, then your failure rate will be 100%. Would you rather have a chance of succeeding, or are you willing to take a guaranteed failure? Sometimes thinking about it in a different way can help.

Good luck, and I know you can do this!

“What we achieve inwardly will change outer reality.”

~Mel