#im very happy with how i managed to improve my coloring over the years

[innielove]

this. this is why i love making gifs.

[sandradoodles]

Hi! i just started reading your confessions comic and i am OBSESSED!! and i didnt want to spam you by rbing all of your posts so i am going to write my Thoughts here :3

First of all i just wanted to say how much youve improved over the course of making this comic!! the lineart is so much Smoother and neater, the shading is so PRETTY, i love how youve done the backgrounds, whether you actually draw them or put flowers or something else behind the characters, and the layout looks so much more proffesional and puts the focus on the right things!! ALSO your anatomy has improved sm and i love all the wild expressions!!

Also i LOVE the teal colouring with pink accents, its such a pretty combo and its kinda like your trademark now!!

And obviously the whole story is so GOOD. i love how you cranked up the Idiot Meter to 1000000 bc YEAH theyre IDIOTS!! I loved the whole Clownbug part with ladybug discovering chats in love with marinette and being ANGRY abt it, its one of my favourite flavours of love square, and pt 6 of the comic was also SO entertaining!! miscommunication my beloved <3

I also love the first panel of pt nine, its just so pretty!! and ofc the shenanigans with the design contest, it feels v realistic and you absolutely NAILED mari's character!!

And the bee miraculous akuma is GORGEOUS!! it looks v menacing but also rlly cool and i would KILL to see the full design

i also love the way you showed marinettes progress with the jacket!! the montage of them bonding and working on the jacket is so cool <3 (and the shoulder gag is rlly funny lksdjhghjkgfdkjh)

FINALLY the jacket itself is just. BEAUTIFUL. the design on the back is absolutely stunning, and i love how you incorporated the miracle box and roses (did mari draw inspiration from chat? 👀👀) and the pink inside is so cute!! and the paw mark w marinette's signature!! (also i see you have a weakness for bomber jackets and you are RIGHT they ARE the pinnacle of fashion)

and buttercup reveal my beloved!! the blush!! the awkwardness!! the wild expressions and gestures!! i LOVE IT!!

also, i love all the small details!! like how you shaded marinettes palms as hearts, its so cute! <3

Anyways im just REALLY exited to see where youre going with this comic!! <3

omg omg omg okay I woke up to this, immediately read it FIVE TIMES IN A ROW, and have spent all day trying to figure out how to reply to so many lovely compliments 😭😭😭

THANK YOU SO MUCH OBVIOUSLY it means the world that you read every part and then took the time to type this up! This comic is such a labor of love for me and I'm always trying to work in a lot of fun and cute little details/moments so when people notice and point out those things it makes my heart SWELL WITH JOY. (If you like the hearts on her palms, part ten has some hidden hearts as well heehee)

When I started this my only goals were to scratch my lovesquare itch and get comfortable drawing again after being out of the habit for years. I had, idk maybe ten followers and did not expect anyone to read it or that I would actually manage to draw more than five parts or so AND NOW HERE WE ARE lol. I am so happy that you can see an improvement in the art, not just in how the characters are drawn but stuff like backgrounds and the visual storytelling as well. I hope to get better and better with each part!

Reading your comments about the characterization makes me wanna screech with happiness because I LOVE. THESE. IDIOTS. SO MUCH it is ridiculous!! RIDICULOUS! And as much as I adore leaning into them being incredibly stupid, it is important to me to show how much tenderness lies at the heart of their interactions. They are so, so stupid because they’re so, so sweet. Confessions is very much “journey over destination” because I just want to indulge in as much insanity, humor, awkwardness, confusion, affection, devotion, and partnership I can manage to tease out of their relationship in one story.

The color palette btw was a complete and total happy accident! Sometimes a thing works because you put lots of thought and effort into it, and sometimes a thing works because you fell on it. The color palette is an example of the latter but THE JACKET is an example of the former, haha. The amount of time it took to develop not just the meaning of it but literally the physical design (gotta look like something Marinette might actually make, gotta be something that I can draw a bunch of times, gotta be something that [spoilers redacted], gotta be something that fits over Chat’s shoulders, gotta be something that actually looks good, omg.) I have a whole post about it already but still more to say because I always have more to say! this is so much rambling I’m sorry

One of the big challenges I’ve had in trying to make a comic is figuring out how to balance what to say, what to show, and what to imply. The jacket is first and foremost exactly how Marinette presents it, a means to hopefully reach Adrien and deliver the card from his classmates. The specifics behind the design are more implied. Marinette pours a week of blood sweat and tears into creating this jacket, and as far as Chat Noir sees, she is single-mindedly focused on that task. But we all know she’s ALSO carrying the responsibilities and concerns of being Ladybug. Losing the Miraculous is obviously like... the biggest thing, a terrible and invisible weight that she carries alone!

Except not, because Chat Noir is there. He’s there for Ladybug, he’s there for Marinette, he’s a constant presence in her life and his support allows her to move beyond the shame and horror of losing the Miraculous. Marinette embroiders the symbols of the stolen Miraculous centered around the ladybug and surrounded by irises (sorry they aren’t roses!), and it looks like a topical show of support for her local superheroes; Ladybug embroiders the symbols of the stolen Miraculous centered on the ladybug and surrounded by irises and it’s a promise to her city that she’s going to get them back. (That she stitches the symbol of the cat in the left-hand side of the lining so that it zips over the wearer’s heart might mean something too but that was... more subconscious.)

ANYWAYYYYYYYYYYY I hope that my long-winded rambling comes across appropriately as a sign of JUST HOW THRILLED I am to have received this beautiful thoughtful ask. Hopefully the behind the scenes talk was fun to read haha. I am so honored and I hope you continue to enjoy the story!!

[jidai]

jidai’s budget mutuals/friends appreciation

Hi, all! I’m quite late with this but I decided to put a small friends and mutual appreciations post in hopes of brightening up the end of this year a little bit. ❤️ If you were tagged, please make sure to check below for a small little message from me. However, I want to make it very clear that I truly appreciate all of my mutuals. You guys brighten up my dash and always reblog or create so many funny and creative posts. I just wanted to give a few special shout outs to those that have taken out the time to reach out and interacted with me past my ask box or we just see each other often.

The messages are ordered by your URL, so you might have to scroll for awhile before you see your messages. I’m so sorry lmao. 

Happy New Years, everyone!

@25th​​, Nonnie, the Young Genius. bro, remind me how old you are 🧍‍♀️ Like my brain CANNOT fathom the thought that you’re so skilled at SO many things and you’re not even in your twenties??? PLEASE SPARE THE TALENT. i will even accept crumbs. But I’m writing to tell you that you are such a wonderful presence on my dash. I always look forward to your gfx. They’re so SO good and you’re improving from one post to another. Like WOW. Now, you’re even starting an art blog, too? You’re so dedicated to the arts. I respect that a lot. Your hard work and commitment will bring you very far in life, whatever you decide to do. 

I love interacting with you. You’re such a big sweetheart and full of positivity and energy. I look forward to seeing more of your art and gfx ❤️

@biscuitwalk​, Dann, the AK Wiz. Dann, I know you’re not as active on here so idk when or if you will ever read this but I want to say that I miss you and your creations so, so much. I will say it a hundred times over and OVER but you inspire me so goddamn much. You have no fucking idea. Your works are absolutely gorgeous and unique. I can look at it once and I can instantly recognize your style (and your cute lil’ pufferfish <3). The way you utilize colors and implement various techniques, shapes, textures into your work. Goddamn, you’re so good. I always look to your work if I ever need inspiration and they help me brainstorm. God, I wish I could put it into words how much I adore your works.

We didn’t really talk for long but you seemed like such a kind and fun person to be around. I wish you the best in your future endeavors, wherever you are. Stay safe <3

@elriccs, Mirai, the Short King. 🧍‍♀️ ok look I know, I know I’m TERRIBLE at replying to you and I’m so fucking sorry. I absolutely love to talk to you but my dumbass cannot seem to reply in a timely manner LASELKSAL. That’s on me and I gotta do better. Anyways!!! Thank you SO fucking much for always leaving such kind messages on my work. I swear to god you’re one of my biggest hype man and I ALWAYS look forward to reading your tags. They’re so funny and it makes me all tingly and happy inside. Bro, like, you just radiate big fun vibes, bro. I really hope that I can get to know you better so I can just insult you until it’s too late to walk away </3

And of course, let me also remind you that I love your works so much. They way that you utilize your textures and those muted colors... OOMPH *chefs kiss* I will always love--

@lockhvrts​​, Em the Soulsborne GOD. hi em 🥺 it’s been awhile since I’ve had a proper conversation with you and I hope you’re doing okay! I miss you and our conversations where we do nothing but geek out and complain about the game industry lmao. if you manage to read this, I just wanted to let you know I miss your presence here. It’s been kinda dull not seeing your beautiful soulsborne gifs and your game rants. Let’s catch up soon. <3 stay safe and well!

@nathanprescutt, Benn, the Man. BENNNNNNNN.  I love you a lot bro. I know we haven’t had long conversations for some time and I hope I can change that! You were my first friend on this blog and I will always appreciate it. I remember us just geeking out over your works and how I would always send you a gfx request like once a week LMAO. The one thing that I have always appreciated about you was the fact that you’re very opinionated (if not, very vocal on your stance on things) and you hold your ground. There were a few time where you encouraged me to speak on topics that I think I shouldn’t and that stuck with me for quite awhile. I’m still a nervous rambling mess when it comes to debates but just know that the one time you supported me to voice my opinion--I hold it very dear to my heart. 

While I don’t spend much time together, I will always remember our animal crossing session. It was  so much fun just trashing and chilling on your island. Especially the bar :( that bar was fucking AMAZING. Maybe once FFXVI comes out, we can geek out hehe

Also, thank you so much for sending in photos of all your doggos, omg. I miss seeing them so much I hope they’re doing well. Stay hot, my German bro lol. Ich bin sehr dankbar, so eine tolle Freundin zu haben. ❤️❤️❤️

@noxdivina​, Lin the Big Dick Daddy Kind. The church is open for business bitch and I’m here to preach the GOSPEL.

Okay, jokes aside, I’m really happy that we became mutuals. You’ve always give off this like, mysterious cosmic vibe (????? huh). And your selfies just further proves that you are wtf. But you’re always so kind to those that you interact with. You’re an absolutely sweetheart and like I just want to give you a giant hug every time we interact. You’re such a soft human being. It’s so nice being around you. It’s like being tossed in the oven and baked at 250 degrees F for 25 minutes. And to boot you’re really talented, hello? God really said let there be a perfect human being and yeeted you into the universe. Thank you for always leaving such kind messages and words in my DM/askbox/works. I cherish them so much. I hope I can get to know you better in the future bc you’re rad, bro <3

anyways, updated drawing of u and maya:

i always assume you’re in a black fur parka 24/7 and maya is coatless neck down. also deck me with those jacked arms of yours thanks  🧍‍♀️

(edit: fuck i forgot to draw a PARTY HAT ON MAYA IM SORRY)

@rokuseis​, Sei, the Dumber.

i have nothing to say to you go away you banana hater ASELKSAEKL

BITCH, you doo bee getting on my nerve 24/7/365 🧍‍♀️ you were an unexpected but a very welcomed addition to my life. I can’t believe we really went 1 fuckin’ year without speaking to each other and then suddenly our friendship blew up because over a stupid BANANA. Now you gotta deal with me and my stupid, random, crude ass messages daily. I cannot. Clown to clown communication. But thank you so much bitch for being there for me and telling all of these funny ass stories and life experiences.

I know I don’t say it a lot because when we talk it’s literally just dogs barking at each other but I want to make it clear now: I love your humor and vibe so much. You never fail to make me laugh anytime I talk to you and I appreciate it so much. I can’t tell you how many times I felt better after talking to you. Even though sometimes your fucking jab hits hard and I end up actually inSULTED BY IT. But thank you for becoming my friend and I look forward to all of our stupid moments together. Looking forward to shitting in your sink when I finally fly to your home <3

@wolfamongthem, Anna, the Grinch. Please don’t hurt me for that title. I'm just saying if someone needs a live casting, it’ll be u. Anyways, did you know that I was so fucking intimidated by you for a long ass time, even before we became mutuals aseljas LMAO. I always see your gifs around on explore and they’re so gorgeous and then I look at your text posts and it’s u roasting people like there’s no tomorrow- 🧍‍♀️ bitch I was SCARED OF U KSKS. Now that I’ve talked to you a few times, you’re really funny like where do you find those reaction memes????? Like bro you and your shitposts is my morning cup of coffee. 

Anyways, in 2021 I expect a full-fledge review of all AAA games from you-- no more shit talking in the tags let it all out BITCH. Thank you for being such a great mutual! I look forward to see what weird shit you will send me the next time we talk lmao

@zenien​​, Selm, the I’m-gay-for-Lady-Maria-or-anything-that-moves-in-BB-Bitch™. ok bitch if I’m being honest I wrote yours last so my brain is FRIED. so everything i say from here is raw from the HEARt cause that’s all I got left. But anyhow, we savin’ the best for last! honestly, i didn’t expect you to barge into my life like that. i really didn’t. i was just gonna keep admiring with my 7 feet (2.1336 meters) pole. I’m glad you made the first move because look where we are wtf 🧍‍♀️ friends??? I wouldn’t believe you if you told me that in 2014 when I first followed you lmao. 

You’re such a kind soul. I know you may disagree but I’m determined to convince you. I can’t tell you how much I want to thank you for taking the time to talk to me during my rough bits. It’s like sitting on a wooden bench in a park during sunset and you sit next to me, just enjoying the vast sky. You radiate such peaceful energy. It’s very calming. Or you know, 2 seconds later i’m suddenly suplexed by your 40 tons of insults like what-- 

Thank you for everything, so far. Truly. It’s been so fun listening to you talk about your Bloodborne journey and see your reactions live. It’s been so fun to see you post your graphics and it continues to blow me away. It’s been so fun hearing about your life and the stories of your adulthood. Every words that we have exchanged, I hold dearly to my heart--more than you ever know. Love u bitch.

[heroquills-a]

s1lentsnip3r replied to your post: hmmmmmmmmmm……….. i feel like doing a random mun...

bet

cracks knuckles.

@s1lentsnip3r @chaosmixed @metallumdash 

words can’t describe how impressed i am by how much you bring your muses to life bwaze. i used to like, not really give a darn heck about metal sonic at all? but after that first thread we had where sonic and proxy got into a fight, i was immediately hooked. you just do such an incredible job at fleshing out characters that i otherwise wouldn’t have really thought much of before and you just have this unique and interesting spin on them that feels fresh. i love the way you play the chao and whisper’s wisps and atia is just a little gremlin but i love them so much, and i’ve literally never seen anyone play chaos before. you just have this way of utilizing that potential that your characters and concepts have and it’s just really awesome to watch. i love it. absolutely a stellar roleplayer. absolutely stellar mun!!

@skyfcx @masterprotector @cosmcther

ties you to a chair. listen here little mister. youre probably one of the OG ppl in this rpc that i’ve lowkey looked up to since first joining. you’ve already heard it plenty of times already but your writing is just ?? stellar ?? from the way you use colorful idioms, expressions, metaphors, to how you capture movement and action in such an engaging way. it’s always a treat to read. the way you portray your muses is just always spot on and i love how seamlessly you capture their mannerisms and speech patterns. your headcanons for tails and knuckles just make me so giddy they just feel so right for their characters, and as far as rosalina goes--- while i know next to nothing about the mario franchise or this character in particular i’m still intrigued enough to peek in on what she’s up to every now and then. over all, you’re a rad roleplayer and a fun person to chat with ooc !! 

@chaosbcrne 

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again. i adore how you write shadow. i’m constantly blown away by how authentic he always feels and how realistic you write him while still remaining accurate and true to his character. like i legit cannot even think of any other place or media i’ve seen besides the games themselves (before sega started botching up his character anyway) where he’s portrayed as accurately as you write him. you manage to balance the serious, aloof, hostile side of him with his playful, competitive, smug side AND the inner naive, almost child like side almost perfectly. and then there’s more, because you add so much depth to him and realistically expand on so many unexplored facets of his character and his roots !! you can just tell this is a character who’s endured so many hardships and is still trying to recover and move on, and despite everything that’s hardened him into the person he is today he still has that innocent curiosity about the world and it makes me so emo every. single. time. you just put so much work into him and it shows, from your icons to your headcanon posts, to even the most minute detail. even when you host events you just go So Hard at it you’re literally out here setting the standard dude. and don’t even get me started on your writing style. i was hooked by the very first thread we did, i felt like i could never hold a candle to it honestly. just. the way you narrate shadow’s feelings and thoughts, how you capture his actions, his movement, his speech patterns, is just so good. and your vocabulary is so colorful and rich. just. hgnfhg its top tier content ALRIGHT you inspire me to push myself and to keep improving all the time and i have to say i couldn’t ask for a better writing partner. i love you so much eph 💕💕💕

@1110-01111011

hello yes trikey i love your omega so much. i’ve never really thought much of the death bot before but seeing all the headcanons and fleshing out you do for him just makes him so much more interesting and fascinating. down to the most intrinsic detail you put in for him it’s just really cool to see and adds so much to him that just !! i love it man. every time i think abt omega now my mind just automatically goes back to your portrayal because he is Just omega. i appreciate all the depth you add to him and his relationships to the rest of his team, it’s so pleasing to see and really helps solidify how strong team dark’s dynamic truly is..... not to mention your art is hecking gorgeous??? like damn dude, goals. anyway,, thank u for the blessed omega content. absolutely 10/10

@coolxnxblue @oforbis @hcrofraid @mastcrplanncr @powderbluestreaks

toxi i immediately fell in love with your sonic the first time we ever interacted. you just capture his sass so well, i just could not stop giggling that first night. he’s still my favorite sonic in this rpc, to be honest. and don’t even get me started on your other muses. it still baffles me how you manage to take on such a huge raster of characters yet manage to flesh them out all so well. every one of them feels so evenly developed and solid and just like bwaze you make me care about characters that i otherwise wouldn’t have before. i feel like i have a huge newfound appreciation for eggman bc of you and unsurprisingly he’s now my fave eggman on here hands down. and it goes without saying your writing is just, phenomenal. you capture dialogue so beautifully, the way you narrate on the feelings your characters are experiencing is engaging, to the point i’m lowkey intimidated by it sometimes LMAO. also your AUs are just rad as hell? and rlly interesting?? and your art style too ????? 10/10 roleplayer, i just think youre neat.

@antibadnik @godcontained

hey you? yes you. i love your muses so much. i especially love how you write amy, to be honest. she’s been my favorite character since forever and like?? you do just such a good job with her? i appreciate that you choose not to erase her intense affection for sonic, because more often than not i see people tone it way down to almost non-existent and it really is just such a big part of her character. i like the way you delve into that mindset of her’s, and expand on it and how it affects her. i also just. love your writing too. you just have this way of conveying feeling in your writing that’s always a punch to the gut you can feel it that hard. your headcanons for elise are really interesting too and definitely nothing i’ve actually seen before, what with how her powers work and how having to go emotionally dormant has effected her after all this time.  also, i love ava. she is baby. it’s so cool getting to see a mute character!! all in all, its just good content man. god i love football.

@team-phantom @heartfelt-silver

pandaaaa i adore you !!! you were like my first friend in this heckin rpc. all of our dash shenanigans always have me wheezing and i just love your boys so much. i can certainly say without a shadow of a doubt that zero is one of my favorite takes on infinite. its hard to believe that he’s the same jackal who almost completely helped eggman take over the world--- he’s just come so far, he seamlessly fits into the rest of the cast. i adore how he works off of his team, and all their own unique little quirks that set them apart from each other. your headcanons and lore for your muse is just so sweet. and god i can’t get enough of your art?? your doodles always are a blessing to see ;-; i always appreciate you youre just such a sweet and kind mun, you’re so welcoming of ppl here and have this way of making ppl feel at home in this community. it absolutely wouldn’t be the same without you. keep it up <3

@lightdash @heartlop @enrichedheart

YOU. yes you. ame you’re so freakin’ cool and sweet. you’re always so nice and welcoming to people in the rpc it’s always a treat getting the chance to talk to you !! you’re another one of those peeps i look up to in this community TBH and youre muses are just portrayed and written so well!! i can just tell you’ve poured many years of thought, consideration, and work into your muses to the point that they’re just so finely tuned. i love the aesthetic you utilize for you blogs, from your icons to just the way you go about formatting your threads? and not to mention, your art style ??? is just so cute ??? ngl i lowkey wanna collab with you one of these days bc i just adore how you draw the sonic cast ;_; thank you for being a part of this rpc !! you’re wonderful !

@projectlightfox

moggg you’re so nice and chill to talk to. i love volt and harmony so much... they fit in really good with sonic world and mesh well with just about any characters i’ve seen them interact with so far--- even if its someone they don’t get along with. i’ve said it before but theyre just a really charming little duo and im always happy to see them on my dashboard. i love the overall aesthetic they got going, two travelers roaming the world from dimension to dimension. harmony is just a little bundle of precious fluffy joy and her interactions with sonic always make me cry. and volt--- he’s such a good dad !! he’s a really neat character and i’m certainly interested in learning more about the both of them. and as i said, you’re a rad person to talk to, i appreciate how welcoming and supportive you are of people. and your art style? absolutely adorable. thank you for being in this rpc ;-;

@dieviskais @solfading 

king!! i’ve never seen anyone write the way you do, choosing to shift the view point onto the reader as if they themselves are the muse. it’s such a unique and interesting way to look into your muse’s mindsets and express how they are feeling and what they’re doing. your take on silver is very fresh compared to the way he’s typically written. i appreciate you don’t take the baby silver uwu route like don’t get me wrong he IS baby but he’s not a baby. you certainly have really neat headcanons surrounding his backstory and how he grew up, it’s nice to see the grim reality of his harsh bleak life being represented. it’s good !! your other muses are intriguing too and i’m eager to learn more about them. i love auburn?? he’s a really cool oc dude his aesthetic and powers are A+. and you know, i may be terrible at expressing it but you’re a delight to talk to!! never feel bad or discouraged for popping into my dms i honestly appreciate the company ;-; thank u for being u

@orbviously / @cubeviously

THESE TWO BOTS. i love them so much. literally every time i see orbot or cubot now in any context i just think back to your portrayal of them hebby, they’re just so dang spot on and good. i love how you go about interacting with people with these two tbh it never fails to make me giggle. i love your art style too it’s just pleasing to look at! you have so many creative AUs for these bots i’m honestly impressed by how much you manage to create with these guys man--- from their human/bot designs to their mobianbot designs theyre just so cool ?? even your other muses are always entertaining to watch regardless of what fandom theyre from youre just so fun to interact with. and just, you’re always a pleasure to talk to ooc, youre always putting a smile on my face! youre awesome hebby 

@fishing-purple-cat

yes hi. sunny your take on big is so blessed. you’ve done so much justice for him. i’ve always really liked big tbh but i just love how much depth you put into his character, his backstory and his mannerisms. i love that you like,, actually give him a personality outside being a slow thinker. i can tell you’ve really developed your writing style with him, it speaks volumes about how much work you really put into writing him and it shows? heck, you even go the extra mile to draw your own icons and hang on i need a second to gush about your art because holy DAMN dude. your anatomy and painting abilities are nothing short of impressive--- especially your nack for painting backgrounds. i srsly gotta commission you at some point when i’m able to, heck. anyway, the rpc certainly wouldn’t be the same without you here

@lnfinitc

dude i love your take on infinite. he’s just about everything he should have been in forces, and even more. i love how malicious and intimidating you write him and your take on his speech patterns is just straight up eye-candy. i love your writing style, its so flavorful and rich--- your headcanons and lore on how infinite works is just astounding. and i like how you incorporate your drawings into your replies or threads too like even if its just icons your style is so heckin pretty ?? gosh dang. i’m definitely looking forward to interacting more in the future bc ur muse is just really fun and you seem like such a rad person !!

@pistolbitten

uhhh hello yes... while we haven’t interacted very much so far i JUST GOTTA SAY, i super enjoy your take on fang. from what i can tell he’s very well-rounded and fleshed out and a really interesting villain. i may or may not’ve been lowkey paying attention to that angel’s thesis thread you were doing w bwaze and aaron and i gotta say. holy damn. fang just done FUCKED UP. im certainly looking forward to him and shade interacting lmao. your writing style is so good too hh... just yeah i don’t have a whole lot to say if only because we haven’t interacted as much as i have with some of the other ppl on here BUT i certainly am looking forward to bc you seem cool. i’m loving what i’m seeing so far. have nack shoot sonic. DO IT.

@mobian-merc @funis-infinite 

duuuudeeee. i’ll be honest i was super intimidated by you at first asdkjsah i don’t even know why i was ??? but like. you’re so hecking nice and fun to talk to ;_; scourge is an actual literal dipshit yet you manage to make him very likable and you have such a fun take on him. i’ve always been a little conflicted on the character tbh because of how popular he is and he seems like the type i’d like but i knew nothing about him and was kinda put off by the over hype sometimes, but honestly? your portrayal won me over. i love him now. he’s so stupid and hE’S GREAT. your infinite also seems so cool too i gotta hecking respond to that starter you made me when i get the chance, im looking forward to infinite & sonic just. talking and sassing eachother probably. i really like your writing style too!!! and your icons are absolutely gorgeous ok. alright, that is all.

@flyinginfreedom

uhhhhhhh hello i love your rouge so much ???? she’s literally so cool... you capture her aesthetic and over all mysterious yet cunning vibe perfectly and it’s just always a pleasure to see her on my dash. i loved her interactions with sonic during eph’s roadtrip event so much. your headcanons just feel so her and spot on, and you still manage to add so much depth and personality to her i just love it so much. i love your blog’s aesthetic down to the icons, and even the way you format your threads. over all just a stellar rouge blog and a really cool & chill mun!!

@rosehammcr @antihedgehog

hi rosie uhm i love your amy so much ok. she’s such a sweet heart, i love how you incorporate her tarot cards ?? it’s literally so cool... and the accuracy on those readings is shocking. she’s just such a sweet heart god i’m getting emo thinking abt her tbh like amy is !! one of my fave characters and !! you write her so well !! and your eggman too, god he’s incredible. i love how sinister yet goofy he can be he’s just a perfect combination of intimidating and silly. your takes on orbot and cubot also bring a smile to my face and i love how you incorporate them into your interactions!! you also just seem like a rlly rad person and i’d love to interact more !! yeah !

@a-wind-of-freedom

yuniiiiiiIII !!  you’re such a sweet heart and your sonic is too. i’ve never seen someone play sonic the way you do before and it’s certainly interesting and unique !! you’ve got so many neat an thought out verses and AUs too, theyre all really intriguing !  our interactions with our sonics are always rlly blessed tbh starlight is just precious. i always appreciate getting to work with you as well for commission stuff, you’ve really been helping me out in that regard. plus you give me something artistic to work on and the chance to push my talents ! ;-; all in all you’re just a really sweet person and have a kind aura about you ! ;;

@champiionic

clears throat. hi yes you’ve been one of my fave sonics since day one. you’re just so creative with your muse its honestly impressive how many things you’ve able to come up with for sonic. from the portrayal you bring to the table down to your muse aesthetic its always just spot on you’ve got the blue speedster’s whole vibe down to a T. and your writing is just ? kisses my fingers. beautiful. your sonic is just so dang authentic, seeing him on my dash is always a pleasant sight. and i know this post is namely about sonic rpc muns & muses but i already love bubbles and blossom. i used to watch powerpuff girls when i was rlly little so its a real nostalgia trip to see them on my dashboard.

@hcpebloom @rcsebloom

bunny !! ur heckin sweet.. i love ur amy so much HSDFHDJ she’s just so soft. and unique too!! your headcanons for her are just so cute and make her stand out in her own way and i just appreciate that yo. and i admittedly don’t know a whole lot about cosmo since i havent really watched that far into sonic x but you’ve certainly got my attention with her. we just gotta interact more man ur muses are so precious !! ;_; 

@fortruechaos 

you !! your shadow is so good dude ! your portrayal of him is just so hecking accurate,, i highly appreciate how noble you write him to be. he’s serious, he’s prickly, but he’s got the world’s best interest at heart and it makes my heart do the fluttery thing. your writing is so good too gosh. no to mention youre just so hecking nice ??? youre just overall a rlly sweet mun & i appreciate your presence here in the rpc

@glittcrngcld @livelifc

hey fretcher ? ily. your muses are just so good from your canon characters to your ocs, i just love them sm?? and your ART? i swoon every time i see your doodles on my dash i’m still not over those doodles of lilly and azure ;-; not to mention your edits are scarily good like shit dude teach me your ways. your takes on your muses are awesome man i love ur sonic he’s such a MEME. and elise !!! she makes me so emo god. thank u for your blessed portrayals of these characters ! @elektrisch-felidae​

YOU. precious is just, precious?? HAH. i love her, she’s so cool tbh. she’s so chill and laid back and seems like the kinda cool cat sonic can totally vibe with. you yourself are also rlly chill and fun to interact with--- even if we haven’t much so far. its no secret i just love sonic ocs so much and precious is just awesome. i love the idea of electricity powers. absolutely need to have sonic hang with her more ;;

@coldheartbeauty 

SPEAKING of cool cats with cool powers, i love raven. her sass is just super entertaining to see on the dashboard tbh. i have to see her and sonic get into a sass off one of these days. her powers are also really cool too ? she reminds me of blaze in a sense, but just completely different in her own right. i also just hella love your art style its so cute, your doodles are always adorable to see!! 

INHALES. ok. im done. if i missed anyone i am so sorry i ran out of steam. thank you all so much for making this rpc such an entertaining, dynamic, and creative place to be !!! 

[nightmaretyrantvantas]

So I have a rant and a half build up of rambling about my very first Percy Jackson Oc Elysia and I need to let it spill so all of you get to hear this info dump about her and my feels

Im putting a trigger warning here I made her when I first read the whole series a few years back. Her backstory isnt the happiest. So im going to put trigger warnings for mentions of (but not going into detail of) abuse, self harm, suicidal thoughts, so if you cant handle mentions of that please dont read this I dont want to upset you

Anyways I have years of work into this bab of mine and I need to get it all out

Also An important thing to note is the timeline of her(and my other ocs) stories. Basically it kinda takes place...as if Trials of Apollo didnt happen?? Sorta? I made her before it ever came out and set her story after Blood of Olympus before trials of apollo was announced so its basically diverges after Blood of Olympus...if that makes sense...I hope it does. 

So basically....At the start of her story Elysia is 13 Nico is 16(from what I remember its been about two years since I read the books so please forgive me)

Ok this might jump around alot because im kinda word vomiting and info dumping about her so if something doesnt make sense please feel free to ask me to clarify I love to

OK SO MY BAB

So her full name is Elysia Angela Melina and shes a Daughter of Hades. At the start when she gets to camp shes 13.

Im going to attatch two pictures ive drawn of her to the post here

This is her with a referrence sheet of her at 13-14 and the digital picture is one of her at the present time that I tend to write about her at age 16.

So Elysia doesnt have things easy. She comes from an abusive household that really fucked her up mentally and emotionally before she got to camp. She ran away at 13 after getting kicked out of her sixth or seventh school and thigs got ugly at home. Stuff happened and she was brought to camp(im refining and probably going to redo how that happens) and well...she doesnt exactly fit in.

Shes on the shorter side for her age and shes lanky and skinny(partially from both skipping meals and sometimes only eating when she can sneak food at home) and she comes onto the scene wearing oversized hand me downs in all dark colors and long sleeves thats got a clear fearful and insecure posture and stance and is always trying to blending into the background and hide from being noticed. Shes got a thick mane of not very well cared for black hair and eyes so dark in color they look completely black, sometimes even in the light with pretty dark bags under them highlighted by really really too pale skin. So it makes her an easy target to be bullied ya know? But she silently takes it like she always does while clutching this beat up little backpack she ran away with as shes put in the Hermes cabin until she’s claimed(which has a 1-3 day delay depending on the god, because a lot of kids come to camp especially at the start of summer) 

When she gets claimed she freaks out and panics because everyone is staring at her and shes suddenly the center of attention because it happened in the middle of the campfire.

So begins the bonding with her big brother.

Shes got alot of inner turmoils and traumas and problems and inner demons and as a result she has undiagnosed anxiety disorders, depression, and some PTSD along with a very low amount of self-esteem and confidence in herself from the ordeals of before reaching camp. Though once shes at camp and she eventually settles in she starts recovering bit by bit. She slowly gets close with nico(it starts kinda awkward for both of them and she comes off really quiet and shy and terrified of sudden movement so its a little hard but they overcome it)

 By the end of her first year at camp shes gotten close to Nico but has a really hard time making friends with other campers her own age so she ends up sticking close to Nico and following him like his shadow because theres a period of time that heś the only person Elysia feels even remotely safe and comfortable around. And as a result at first she spends alot more time with Nico’s friends and various members of the Big Seven and she gets close to them as well(more to her siblings at first but she gets there shes a nervous bean give her time)

Though in the middle of that first year she meets a girl that soon becomes one of her best and closest friends, a daughter of Hephaestus named Karter Becks(the second oc for this fandom I made) and I’ll get to more about their friendship later.

So by the second year at camp shes settled in a little, shes decidedly become a year-rounder because she would rather be eaten by a harpy than go back to “that horrible place”as she dubs it(not to mention its very very dangerous for her outside of camp)

More things about Elysia!!!

At thirteen she had absolutely NO control of reign of her abilities. She couldnt raise or summon the dead, her shadow travel was horribly spotty and half the time she couldnt even do so correctly and her most experience with spirits is that she can sense them and she can hear and speak to them but she cant really see them( they appear as really really blurry shapes that hurt her eyes to look at for too long) of course she beats herself up over this lack of skill, mostly because she(stupidly but understandably) compares her lack of teaching and training and beginner skill level to Nico’s at the time current skill level. Yeah its dumb and yeah in the back of her mind where her common sense is she realizes this but she cant stop herself from doing so, just like she unfairly to herself compares her sword fighting skill to older campers that have been there longer. 

She eventually gets her own sword of Stygian Iron, because no matter what else she tries no other swords feel...right to her. They’re always too heavy or too light too awkward to hold dont work right with her swings or just dont feel right to her so at some point shes overthinking herself to death about it and beating herself up for being too picky when Karter suggests innocently that she tries swinging around her brother’s sword. “After all Elys, whats the worst that would happen, that it feels too heavy?” 

But what ends up happening is that though its too heavy for her, it still feels...right. The best way to describe it is that she feels more connected to her powers and to herself in a way. After hearing that she gets her own of Stygian iron and its...perfect to her. Its not too heavy on her wrist or too light to wield. And afterwards she actually starts getting some more confidence which helps her improve a little faster than before.

Once Elysia is fully apart of camp life it takes a long time for it to fully click that her belongings...are hers and her likes and interests and likes are respected. They wont get taken away or threatened, she doesnt have to hide what she likes or pretend she doesnt like one thing or another. She’s free to be her own person for the first time in her life and she struggles for awhile to adjust to that and accept it. Those struggles result in alot of scattered breakdowns and even one or two...relaspes that for once in her life she has a support system of her half brother and half sister, his friends, her two close friends, and chiron to catch her and help her back to her feet. She has people to lean on and depend on and not have to be afraid of and this helps alot into her recovery and acceptance of herself and her mental illnesses. It takes her two of the three years shes been at camp for her to get at the better place shes at when shes 16, where she now has a small group of good friends, shes managed to bring up some of her self-esteem and self  confidence, shes been clean for a year and shes in therapy for her PTSD and depression and shes opened up more to those around her and shes not the terrified jumps at her own shadow kid but a more quiet but kindhearted and sometimes even giggly teen whose slowly getting her life back together with plans for the future.

But on the topic of things she likes...

This girl loves-no ADORES animals, all kinds mythical or not. She didnt show it at first but she was so SOOOO excited when she realized the camp had Pegasi even though she tried to keep a distance from them because she realized she made them nervous. Oh man you shouldve SEEN her when Chiron took a group of campers her age into the woods and they caught a glimpse of a passing through unicorn. She was giddy about it for DAYS guys. She just...she has so much love and admiration and excitement for animals its so cute you guys.

Elysia also loves(ironically) learning about Mythology, from all over the world. Its her special interest and when she finds and buys a old broken touch screen phone(or one of those touch screen i-pod or something) and gets Karter  to fiddle with it and (eventually after shenanigan filled misadventures of trying to upgrade it to not be detected by monsters and fix the cracked screen) she fills that thing to the brim of downloaded auidobooks of different mythologies as she can and she listens to them when doing schoolwork(she ends up having do be “homeschool” by online classes because things just do not go right when trying to attend schools outside of the protected borders)

She also loves anything soft. Especially stuffed animals. Oh my god she loves stuffed animals, well into her teens. She had one she managed to bring with her to camp that is her ultimate comfort object, a older beat up and been through a life time of ringers and back stuffed husky doll that she cherishes and takes care of like one might take care of gold. Over time (once they found out her birthday--October 5th) she starts getting stuffed animals as presents or just even as little splurges on herself . She also loves soft blankets soft clothes soft anything. She loves the texture and feel of it and it makes her happy.

She’s an aspiring writer and songwriter and can even sing a little but she has no confidence in her ability in any of those. But she has boxes and piles of notebooks and journals filled with little cartoony doodles and pages upon pages of stories and songs shes been writing for years now

Fun fact during her first year at camp Percy and Annabeth dropped by for a visit during their winter break to visit friends and I have this whole little story I might post about hoe when Percy’s walking to go meet someone he finds Elysia sitting alone at the beach doodling animals in her journal and he goes up to her(shes sitting all curled up so at a distance it probably looked like she was crying or something) to see if shes ok and because Nico had been telling him about her via iris messages and updates since she got there but he didnt get to meet her during the summer(stuff happened and she kinda hid from alot of people) but he finds her and he sits with her(after announcing his presence because Nico has told him about her being very jumpy and easily scared and that at that point hes the only one she really opens up to so dont take offense to it) and they sit for a bit and Percy asks her about her doodles and she just, for the first time like ever, she starts to open up because she gets so freaking excited and hyper about it that she just starts babbling away about her doodles and the animals of them and then about animals in general and she goes on this whole, like 30-40 minute info dump/ rant about them complete with diverting tangent questions that she answers herself before continuing with this just lit up and openly happy and ecstatic expression as she goes on and on while hes sitting there just listening to her and smiling down at her partly nostalgically because at that moment she reminds him so much of how Nico was when he first met him and you got him started on Mythomagic and that shes being so open about her excitement and then she looks at him and realizing what she was doing and she shuts herself up now panicking about how much she just word vomited on her big brother’s friend and more importantly this huge shot demigod Son of Poseidon whose saved the world not once but TWICE and who is probably very busy too busy to be hanging around with her--you get the idea of her panicking until Percy slowly reaches out his hand and she nods to let him know its ok and he ruffles her hair and tells her its ok he liked listening to her and holy shit I went on a tangent about that. 

She also has alot of sweet bonding moments with Nico and Hazel because they teach her about having a loving and caring family and what thats like and its really sweet and cute and emotional

Did I mention she likes taking Nico’s shirts? Oh yeah she likes “borrowing” Nico’s shirts, and some of his jackets, mostly t-shirt and long sleeved shirts because once they get close his scent and presence really relaxes her nerves if she gets anxious. Of course its not stealing, its just borrowing and eventually giving back on laundry days...or he just lends it to her without being fully aware of it. Its cute because shes so short that they end up really big on her and she loves flapping the sleeves and the feeling of being engulfed in the safety of his presence without him even being there

ANYWAY COUGH COUGH 

uhhhhhhh....yeah thats alot about her huh I think i’ll leave you all with that to take it and make sense of and I might make a part two(or you guys can ask about her too) 

and yeeeeeeeeeee thats my PJO oc Elysia Melina!!

@phantommoonpeople 

@kid-crashed

@demidorks (im sorry if im bothering you by tagging you youre one of the pjo blogs I follow and one of my favorites)

[yuissamidare]

@codes i think i may have put this on my artblog but... Here

i guess ill start w ichi bc i always forget about him somehow like i always come up short when im making lists and im like 'oh wait shit yeah that guy’ bc im stupid n i only think of fishing trio + choro. I’m an Idiot. idk i never thought too hard on ichi bc i so rarely think about him but he looks so high its really funny i said this on main but he looks like my friend when he decided to try a weed gummy bear then started babbling about hentai then watched to watch porn with me but got mad all the intro scenes are a billion years long and started ranting about the industry but now that i think about it he looks like someone who used to send me weird shit when he was high like bad pick up lines about body parts i wish i didnt have

and thats so funny that its Ichimatsu who looks like that but also proof that hes high. but anyway!! hes really cute and im mad hes boutta ruin my reputation for my complete and utter lack of care and interest in him no matter what im mad. my friend gwyn said 'Sp lubing us up for the fuckening that is the reason why Ichi is sad in present day’ im really curious at the change like if hes trying a fake it till you make it type thing bc really emotionally exhausted or if hes just genuinely having a good time or hes puttin on a front since like. nails who stand get hammered down right??? just gotta do your best n Never Relax n i can relate to all that. but uhhh old hcs i guess

in kun ichi was the most serious! really smart but just as bad w school as the rest of them apparently but!! yeah so id think that!! ichis that guy who participates in class discussion constantly and is always willing to debate the readings, but turns in sloppy papers with typos and no a coherency or stucture or anything. he’s A+ in participation but has an average of 60% on most of the written assignments with points knocked bc of lateness then more bc its A Mess. you could ask about the prompts for one of his papers, he could babble about his position on it complete with paragraphs and footnotes but like the day before its due hes playing rpgs and watching horror movies.

his classmates think hes so smart n so intimidating. the family knows hes a hot mess. the teachers tell him he has a lot of potential but they don’t think hes applying himself. all are right. also he doesnt cheat or let people cheat off of him since hes always been about rules and boundaries and Rightness n he n jyushi were the only ones who Minded Themselves in kun

uhh jyushi!! let me talk about schoolwork again bc yeah i love jyushi so so so so much and thinking of him in a school environment is so weird i thought about it a lot n i thought about it him in kun n san and Woah!! i really really love delinquent jyushi, bc when i saw that i was like 'huh! that fits actually!!’ i love that like him and choro flip flopped completely from what i thought. his school must be so cold theyre too cheap to afford heating in the winter and in summer the acs Blast. he was so Shy and quiet and he cried and he liked to sing so i always thought that when he participated in chorus festivals hes always like right in front!! he hums a lot in class and also moves around alot bc he actually like school and people like primary trio are the types that make friends often. i wasnt supposed to talk about this yet whoops.

unlike ichi who relatively neat despite everything but has shit notes, jyushis notes are amazing and understandable and utterly illegible.

theyre covered in doodles, arrows and lines leading every which way, different colors but not like color coded n theyre not in order by date, but he opens to a random page every time yet somehow always seems to know where to find each lesson. he writes footnotes and caveats and corrections and criticisms of the teachers and random thoughts and just smears ink everywhere. sometimes his notes are on a completely different subject. the notebook itself is a horrifying mess, the front and back covers both covered in drawings and designs and falling apart, random papers shoved between the pages, coming apart at the seams, covered in stains of unknown origin. assignments are full of emoticons and informal language, and they always manage to make his teachers feel like hes smarter than they are (most likely). he does his projects the minute theyre assigned, and is finished a minute later so can talk to his friends. he loved school.

sophie told me once about how she thought was Like That was bc one of his main concerns is that he thought he had nothing that made him Jyushi n in kun she said he might have been the one who was the most concerned about having a distinctive personality and i talked about how that sorta carried over san and how he always blended in bc of how gentle and soft and push-overy he was. he was actually the and most gullible and weakest in kun so i was like :0 when i saw that and intentionally did stuff like only carry 14 yen in his pockets to be quirky but it always sorta fell flat and he was still invisible so i was like hmmmmm. and i can see how he couldve toughened up and thinking of this now!! i love that. oh im so happy. this is so much better than i ever couldve imagined ever.

totty…. i do not think he was very popular or good at school. i think he’s very decent at schoolwork but he never put much effort into it. just copies whats on the board but if the class runs out of allotted lesson time n he couldnt finish his work he just didnt do it like cram schools a pain in the ass. if he put effort hed be a star student but he just craps out whatever since hes was the laziest!! oh but something i noticed was that him and jyushi would play together often since sometime he felt overwhelmed by karamatsu a lot. also hes the money thief and scammer its great kun todo is so good. he gets shy and flustered easy too!!

but uhh yeah!! depending on the day im always like 'zaimoku love each other so much they are best friends and the perfect other halves!!’ then im like 'these mofos hate each other what the fuck is this trainwreck’ did you see their shitty small talk in the horse episode. what was that. like they are genuinely trying to communicate and are pretty easy with each other but they have nothing to say. its like when youre having a boring day at school and theres nothing to talk about with an acquaintance so you just look at the walls and go 'have you ever noticed how stupid these posters are’ then you both start reading posters aloud but you both know its not that funny and youre just doing it to waste time but you still enjoy their company you just dont want silence. thats their relationship. and i think they are just very similar in very different ways and like. the key things that make them both similar and different and the same fuck them up (like suiriku!! theyre both really similar even if it doesn’t seem like it at first which is why their compatibility in the relationship chart was so low in s1, but i saw a lot of improvement in both of their behaviours and their communication and honestly. s2 was worth it for that sophie was so happy to see her faves get along) like sometimes when you look in the mirror all the things you see are the things you dont like about yourself instead of what makes you wonderful and unique. also i didnt mean to talk about this but i guess i am.

but yeah. totty is bitter n resentful at kara during hs n karas more confused and upset at tottys behaviour in their twenties n thats bc like i said. theyre dumb. karamatsu!! i think was actually pretty popular in highschool n had a good amount of friends - i genuinely think theatre kids are well liked bc i literally know everyone in my department and im friends w a good amount of people and im not even That extroverted. my actual extrovert friends know everyone in the school by name and everyone in my department is so nice even though theres a lot of bitchiness and drama its not as bad as w other humanities studies (jesus christ humanity students outside of theatre are a hot mess.)

uh yeah n that ultimately makes totty feel a bit… betrayed? karamatsu is his partner! theyre supposed to be there for eachother! kara’s the first one to branch out, get friends etc etc and todomatsus left behind bc hes always the one playimg follow the leader and he breaks out of that once they graduate - he grows up resenting karamatsu slightly though he still cares. but this time Hes the one cancelling plans to hang out with friends instead. my friend katie put it best when, in response to me telling them this, they sent me:

'kara: totty you have so many friends now. We barely see you anymore.

totty, applying chapstick: well, I learned it from the best.’

when i told them about it. but at the time gwyn and i were babbling about possibilities and different storylines and how theres a possiblity the movie might break down into three manageable plotlines n she gave zaimoku 'popularity’ and this was me throwing out ideas but honestly. Good. (aha, the end of this scenario ended up with todo throwing hands and shoulder checking someone outside a window and then getting removed from the premise n hanging with atsushi all night after) why am i on this. shit what happened here.

uhh but yeah totty is Def someone with learned behaviours rather than being a natural extrovert honestly just look at him hes an introverted mess masquerading as a decent human being and i know full well how people like that are bc some of them have been my best friends for years n seein the new hs promos solidifies that fact bc look at him. Crybaby. He is Miniscule. A Child.

then its 'delinquent who looks like an honour student’ choro. i never studied him until sophie started liking choro n since i love sophie i wanted to take an interest in him too. n i started to think very hard about him! then gwyn planted this in me n its taken root and im just never not gonna think its great. yall see his shitty gokudo impression what a bossy lil shit. he pulled a whip on kara once and it was mad funny but also Gwyns Big Evidence for him just being the absolute worst not like a casually skips class type but a Choro was a legit a bully and really mean n sabatoged other classmates to make him look like he was 100% That Bitch. maybe not him being Mean and cruel but just an asshole who bums around, is something i really like that one a lot its been one of my faves since gwyn n i started talking about it but i just!! have a ton of other things too!!

hes a lot like karamatsu in that theyre both stupid and weird and embarrassing and they put on airs but they also!! dont try!! they talk so big and such high goals n expectations and they dont do shit bc they have so much hubris but i always talk about them bc suiriku is sophies Beloved so ill like. Not. but he acts like he’s better than all of them n forces the role of the straight man on himself because he wants to be seen as the responible, level headed one even if hes just. So Much.

i think the movies calling back to how touchy feely and clingy he was in kun and adding on to how jyushis a delinquent and kara… Is Like That he’ll be around them the most bc jyushi might either be really protective or push him away and then they do something to mend their relationship later on or hell cling to kara and they just. grow apart. sticking to my hc until the end bitches. oh.

for choro… personally!! i thought hed be a slacker instead of a delinquent but not in the way totty slacked - totty was lazy n knew the work but didnt want to put in effort but choro just. Doesnt. choro has so much energy all the time and choro Can Not deal with school situations. bc like… you always hear people say that studying is meant to be done at the desk, silently, no distractions what so ever!! focus on notes and nothing else!! ise a highlighter but dont use it too much!! make your notes legible but you only have five minutes before the board gets erased!! review!!! look at your notes or youll die! take breaks bit dont take too long and honestly. listen. kun choro wouldnt be able to stand that shit and id think hed just think he was doing it The Wrong Way n he just wasnt meant to do it.

he doesnt like quiet classrooms!! he cant study like that and hell get distracted. he cant sit still n thats why totoko broke up w him in the beer ad and why hes just Everywhere in kun!! hes understimulated and its just Ugh! you know??? he’ll fidget w his pens until he breaks them or hum or tap his foot and annoy everyone or leave for the bathroom at least three times a class just to get up and move.

eventually he just. gives up even though hes super smart he like, stops caring bc if you dont care to understand material then you wont have to read and read and reread and rereread something to get it! classes just make everything uncomphrehensible and makes any idea he may have sublimate into nothing. but he can work on the trains and the buses! he needs something kenetic to get him moving and trains n shit always have enough going on to work with, just like with home!! chorochoro motherfuckers. he works much better moving forward, ironic as that is. he feels sorta set apart from every thing like hes behind some big plane of glass doing everything wrong and being all set apart from everything. eventually he takes to acting like a real fussy mom to avoid his own problems and help everyone else out even though hes annoying and even when he graduates but it gets Worse bc then figures out how much!!! he fucked up!! then he kicks himself into high gear n still cant do shit. ahh.

its illegal for me to talk about choukei bc i talk about them so much and im always being annoying n typing stupid essays about them bc theyre… my faves.. But this is so long…

it actually makes me super happy that he kara acne he still can be really fighty and he cries and he still does stupid impulsive shit for others and even though hes really sweet and caring is still an utter monster and fucking mess of a person. love him. i always like to think his shittymatsu nickname came from iyami n it just morphed from there bc in 66 you can hear iyami calling him specifically garbage. ive always been glad they kept his sewing hobby too. ahh, actually from what i see hes pretty similarities to kun so i wonder when he decided to air out that teremity. idk what to say about him that i havent in tottys section. he just Feels like someone who had a good support group and nice friends bc of how hes able to move in the world. kara feels like some whos doing their growing up in their twenties bc highschool came easy to them and now theyre just really struggling with the real world. like i shouldve expected softboy hs kara and i appreciate him very much!! i talk about choukei a lot bc they were the first characters that spoke so i immediately attached myself to them n i talk about karamatsu Specifically but im not sure i ever mentioned how much i appreciated how smart and cautious hes proved himself to be time and time again, like how hes the only one to point out totokos fish shtick aint doing her favours or how he was the first one to notice osos irritation n how you can pick out his voice warning jyushi to calm down in the bg of 24 or how in the comedian episode he was ready to take Notes from iyami and a lot of other small things!!

i would think hes actually a bit more serious n calm in hs and san is him amping up traits that drew people to him in hs and it backfiring on kara spectacularly - kara is always gauging people and their reactions and acting in a way he believes will get something positive, but at the same time is utterly oblivious when it comes to actually Getting them n i talked about the girls on the bridge but this is also prevalent with ichi who kara just. Doesnt Get and can not figure out how to maneuver their relationship. like oso, kara is and elder brother!! and elder brothers have an image theyre supposed to uphold, but while kara acts the part he doesnt do the shit a big brother does and shrugs that responsibility off on oso until oso fucks up until s2, where they share the role more evenly and his relationship with ichi improves but this is another essay entirely. what im trying to get with that is that hyperfocus on what other people think of him, but his complete disregard when it comes to their actual reaction and instead what he wants their reactions to be would also greatly impact him transtioning from a teen to an adult im sorry im getting sloppy now

osomatsu… i really adore him too much and i understand how totty felt in their episode bc i also lent my phone to a friend who needed to desperately jack it before meeting new people n i talk about him a whole lot too. hes mean and an asshole and garbage n i know a lot of people find him plain n boring but idk. i dont think thats the case hes a really complexed n nuanced character n hes literally has always been way back from kun n thats expected from a main character but… hes always been mean n dumb n sly and he can get so pathetically vunerable and thats literally!! him. hes a normal dude nothing wrong with that n it can be real refreshing. n i suppose im so fond of fishing trio+choro bc they remind me of my friends. but yeah even if hes 'plain’ i dont see why thats a bad thing. n this they always have the most interesting body language like despite kara being So Much his body language was always closed off n singled him out as everything But exuberant and bright, and osos quirks like how he stands on his toes a lot had always been so cute… its relaxed and open n screams Talk To Me!!!!

ahh but i always end up thinking oso was. oso??? theres not much to say that i havent before but i do think that he was a lot more like he was in episode 2 when ranting to chibita about having shitty brothers and then actively Chose to be a good brother even if he wasnt a good person and be a stable rock and be someone they could all come back to at the end of the day. and hes good at math im never letting this die.

[surveysonfleek]

907.

Is popularity a social disease? if it matters that much to you, then yes, it’s a social disease. Would you want to be a hippie? not really. i respect the lifestyle and culture, i’m just not into it. In college, were you ever given exams with extremely broad and deep questions such as, ‘Why?’ or 'What is truth?’ it wasn’t a ‘what is the truth?’ type situation, it was more about what our opinion on the topic was. Have you knowingly destroyed an endangered plant or animal? nope. Did your parents bronze your first pair of baby shoes? i don’t think so... i’d know if it still existed if they did.

Do you check for a train when crossing tracks in your car even though the arms aren’t down? there aren’t many train crossings in my city tbh. i’ve never actually crossed one after all these years of driving. Is there gossip going around about you right now? i don’t think so. i live a pretty drama free life these days. How many comic strips do you read daily: none. If you were hiding from a burglar, would you hide in the closet or under the bed? under the bed i think. What do you most commonly use milk for: drinking or cooking? cooking. Who should provide the condoms in a relationship: the man or the woman? both should be responsible but the man should definitely always have some. imagine being the woman and always having to provide that? Are you ever afraid that people hate you and they’re just acting like they don’t? haha it’s definitely happened before. When you’re crossing the street with other people, do you ever feel a need to get to the other side first? nope. i just walk in the clearest path possible. Should people be able to go to college without a high school diploma if they score high enough on entrance tests? i mean, i think so. everyone has a right to an education. i don’t think entrance tests would be that easy either. Would you be embarrassed if people could hear you talking to your pets? haha no. If elephants were bred to a smaller size and sold as house pets, would you want one? it’d be a cool idea but probably not. Do you refer to people as 'dude’? no. Do you remember the last time you wrote a 'snail mail’ letter? haha nope. i’m assuming it would’ve been a greeting card though. Do you think beards/mustaches make men look older than they actually are? not particularly. Are you usually the one to initiate sex with your significant other? my boyfriend and i are pretty equal in this situation. When you’re having trouble burping when you feel like you need to, does patting yourself on the chest seem to help? haha no. i just do it. Do you have your wallet with you right now? yes. If it ever came down to a final battle between good and evil and you knew that evil was going to win, who would you fight for? i’d stay away as far from this battle as possible. i hate getting involved in conflict. Do you feel guilty when you borrow money from your parents? haha yes. Do you constantly have times where you have no money and then earn a lot of money and you don’t know what to do with it? no. my money always goes to bills etc. Do you always see yourself as the protagonist in the story of your life? of course. it’s my life. Can you drive by a car accident without staring? yes. i’ll have a quick glance but this shit causes soooo much traffic, even on the lanes going the opposite way. it drives me nuts. Do you find it a challenge to congratulate your opponent who just beat you in a game or competition? haha yes. Do you think that no matter how cold or heartless someone seems there is always at least one thing in the world that they love? yes, definitely. im sure 99.9% of people have a soft spot for something/someone. Who is worse: Someone who doesn’t repay a loan or someone that steals your CDs? someone who doesn’t repay a loan because i don’t own any cds haha. Why do you think so many homosexual men still go without condoms: because they don’t know of the dangers, or because they don’t care? both tbh. When you think about morality, do you think more in terms of good/bad people, or good/bad actions? actions. Which of these female comedians is funnier: Ellen Degeneres or Margaret Cho? i haven’t seen much of magaret cho’s stuff so i’ll just say ellen. Are you scared of dying alone? yes. dying in general. Are you most comfortable being treated by a doctor of the same sex as you? of course. Do you take daily walks? nope. i mean i walk everyday but i not like for exercise. Are there some slang terms you refuse to use? i hate the slang ‘litty’ lol. so cringy. Do you have a favorite pen that you use all the time? haha no. i have ones that i prefer writing with but i don’t have one fave. Have you ever changed an adult’s diaper? no. Do you think it’s dangerous or a good thing when two very depressed people start to date each other? dangerous. it’ll either go one of two ways. down a spiral of negativity if they’re feeding off each other’s problems or positive if they find true happiness within each other.

Do you know a game that is very stupid, yet very addicting? most iphone games haha. i’m totally guilty on this. Do you plan on having your children Christened/Baptised? probably.  Would regularly seeing videos of you interacting with people significantly improve your overall human effectiveness? that’d be cool. i think it’d work lol. Have you ever misspelled 'misspell’? i haven’t ever had to use it much. Have you ever stayed up for more than 24 hours to study for an exam? nope. Have you ever been in the back of a moving truck? yes haha. When you were young, did you know some pop stars were gay? probably. Do you have control over how much peace there is in your mind? sure. If you got a backstage pass at a concert, would you feel better than everyone else? um, yes duh.  Is your microwave any other color besides white? it’s black. Would you prefer a bagel or an entire breakfast in the morning? i’d prefer the bagel as long as there’s cream cheese. Do you think that couples that elope have a better chance of staying together? every couple is different. i’m not one to make a call on this. Do you know of a frozen dinner that tastes good? ugh, not at all. i hate them. Will public restrooms no longer be separated by gender in the near future? probably. If you do not eat red meat but eat fish are you a vegetarian? isn’t that a pescatarian? When you discard a piece of paper, which of the following are you more likely to do: rip it apart in pieces or crumple it? i’ve done both. if it’s a confidential document i’ll rip it up. Do you wear your pants and shorts above or below your waist line? above usually. Have you ever wondered what it would be like to have a sex change operation? yes. i’m assuming it’d be a mentally and physically draining experience. as long as they’re happy though. Do you call margarine 'butter,’ even though you know the difference? haha nope, i’ll call it margarine. Do you bathe less when you are depressed? yes. Should the ASPCA and RSPCA ban the practice of kidney transplants in cats, since cats can’t give consent for the surgery? i have no knowledge on this. Would you ever drink from a bowl or cup made out of human bones? probably not. just a creepy feeling. Does your car normally smell good? i guess so. i’m obsessed with air fresheners. Do you think 9/11 will be the worst thing you will see in your life? i mean it’s up there as one of the most memorable news stories of my childhood. but since i wasn’t there in person, i’m sure there could be worse things i experience personally throughout my life. Do you tend to do more research for school or papers at the library or on the internet? internet. Do you have an outfit you wear that makes you feel like a star? haha no. i’m yet to find the perfect outfit. You are working at McDonald’s frying meat. Your manager is being a jerk and you are ticked. A customer comes in and orders a 20-piece box of nuggets. Out of anger towards your manager, would you pack 20 or more, or 19 or less in that box? 20 or more. the customer didn’t do anything, why should they suffer? Once you’ve made up your mind about the kind of person someone is, can anything they say or do change it? yeah, it’s possible. Is there a single person whose whole existence you might be interested in studying? not seriously. a quick google search will do lol. Do you think that cuddling with a member of the opposite sex, with no intention of sexual relations, is cheating? i think it’s odd. why would you be cuddling someone that wasn’t your significant other in the first place?  Which would you be willing to give up the internet for: world peace or immortality? world peace. i cbf being immortal if it means i can never go on the internet anymore. Are you a redneck? no. Do you think by 2050 there will be flying cars? i wouldn’t be surprised. Should politicians be allowed to have a private life? sure. Do you avoid going over to other people’s houses because it makes you feel uncomfortable or out of place? omg yes. i don’t mind it but i always feel so awkward. i’m just so comfortable in my own home, i’d prefer my friends coming over instead. If someone you don’t know too well puts you in the buddy list of his or her profile, would you be suspicious, or would it be OK that he or she did that? depends who it is. Do you have a trash can in every room of your home? most rooms. Who said “I love you” first: you, or your partner? me lol. Do you ever lay down and watch a movie, only to fall asleep in the very beginning and wake up when the movie is over? all the damn time. Do you say 'thank you’ before leaving a store, even though you may not have purchased anything? if someone’s helped me out, then yes definitely. Would you approve if your significant other wanted to have a nude painting done? sure. lol. If there were nine guilty people and one innocent, and they all had to be together, would you put them all in jail or set them all free? depends on the crime. Is your pet also your best friend? of course :) When the toilet backs up, do you call someone to fix it or do you do it yourself? i try to fix it myself. then i pass it on to my parents and then plumber if need be. Have you ever recited a love poem to your significant other? nope. Would you rather be 'all head and no heart’ or 'all heart and no head’? i’d rather be all heart and no head even though i’m probably the opposite. Are your teeth discolored? slightly. When you were a child, did you make or buy your Halloween costumes? mostly make thanks to my mum. Have you ever seen a movie and liked it but upon further viewing come to like it a lot less? nope. If your father was a minister, would you want him to preside over your wedding ceremony? nope. i’d want him to be my father on my special day, not as a minister. Would you prefer to watch porn or a really good comedy? comedy. How long did your longest phone conversation ever last? over 24 hours but technically it was on skype. Do you put your initials on everything you own? no. Do you like or dislike people based on who else likes or dislikes them? no. even with a bad rep, i’d figure them out on my own. Do you have a friend who you hang out with only when there is nothing else to do? haha no, that’s mean. Which is harder: calculus or trigonometry? i hate them both. Do you often find yourself correcting your parents? when it comes to technology...always. If you could stop aging at a certain age, do you know what that age would be? 25ish. Do you more often eat off of real plates or paper plates? real plates. Have you ever had tape over your mouth? i tried it out myself as a kid. haha. If you encountered someone you totally didn’t know and he or she seemed to tell you the solutions to your uniquely specific problems without having been told what they were, would you be more thankful or freaked out? i’d freak out. i’m skeptical about everything. Would you rather eat a raw egg or a scoop of raw hamburger? omg neither. Do shy kids tend to grow up to be freaks? whaaat? not at all. When you put on a shirt, do you button up or down? i button down. Do you scent your letters when you write to a special someone? haha yes, i did it years ago. Is punk influenced more by music or attitude? music. actually idk. Did you ever start a thread that got at least 40 posts? yes. Can you recall the ending of the last story you read? nope. Have you ever had your head stuck in an unusual place? no. Do you have any weird or funny local slang? haha yes. chat, ceebs etc. When you come online, is there always one person you look for? back in the msn days, yes. not anymore. Do lava lamps make you sick looking at them? i never had one, so no. i find them fascinating still. Will Hollywood ever run out of ideas for movies? they’ve already run out. i feel like everything is a remake of something these days. Does P. Diddy telling everyone that he is the new Frank Sinatra make you want to roll your eyes? haha he could not be serious. Do you think the state of the global environment will be better or worse in 50 years? wors. Do you eat dinner in the dining room or in the living room? both. Which Mike Judge cartoon do you prefer: Beavis and Butthead or King of the Hill? neither. never watched them. Have you ever fallen off your chair in public? no. When sleeping, do you face the doorway or have your back to it? face it. Do you find poetry that expresses pain and suffering to be more intriguing than other types? i hate poetry. Do you only pretend looks don’t matter because you’re ugly yourself? haha i don’t pretend. looks matter to an extent. Do you find limericks to be funny and clever or annoying? funny when i was a kid. Do you think you’d be capable of representing yourself in court rather than hiring an attorney to do it for you? no. When you flirt with someone, is it obvious or more subtle? awkward if anything. Which character do you think weighs more: Jabba the Hutt or Fat Bastard? idk lol. Do you think couples break up mainly because of differences they can’t resolve or because they have found someone new? it’s possible to simply fall out of love without having someone else in the picture. Do you reread things that are written well? yes. What hurts more: getting poked in the eye or biting your tongue? poked in the eye. Do you prefer merry-go-rounds or ferris wheels? ferris wheels. better views. Which do you prefer: original or flavored Tootsie Rolls? original. If you had three children, would you rather have two boys and a girl, or two girls and a boy? two girls and a boy. Is having a threesome basically approved cheating? if it’s approved, it’s not cheating. Is it a turn off to you if the woman has a deep, manly voice or if the man has a high, pre-pubescent voice? no. Have you copied (or “ripped”) your entire CD collection onto your computer? yep lol. Do you have buns of steel? i wish! Did you use floaties on your arms when you were learning to swim? yep. Did your first ever snog involve French kissing? no. there was a lot of pecking involved first. Do you know a person who is physically unattractive and yet a flirt? haha yes. Are there a lot of programs on your computer that you don’t know how to use? yep. like half of the adobe cs. Do you live in an uncomfortable environment, such as where you feel you cannot be yourself? nope. If you had discovered a body on the side of the road would you see if it was still alive? i’d be scared shitless but i would and call emergency. Does punishing everyone for the actions of the few get us closer to utopia? hell no. Can you finish an entire 2-liter bottle of soda by yourself in a single sitting? no way. i’d feel like shit. Have your parents ever forbidden you to play a certain type of music in their house? nope. Since you reached dating age, have you been single for more than three years? nope haha. i’ve been taken for most of my dating life. When buying shampoo or soap, do you choose one because of what they put in it, or because you like the smell? i buy based on what they’re supposed to do to my hair. Have you ever had writer’s block? never really had to write since uni, so no.

[parurushi]

hey!!! could you please recommend me some nice japanese girl groups/bands or other female artists? im fairly into kpop, but i want to get more into jpop as well!

Of course! (sorry for the delay)

I divided it in four parts: first some of the big names that you’d probably see mentioned constantly, then some personal recommendations for idol groups and vocal/dance units, followed by bands and finally a few other acts worth checking out~ (I tried to include links for each group, but there’s a few that I missed as they have their videos blocked on my country thanks to YouTube Red. Depending on where you are it may be a little harder to access to the content of certain groups)

Big names: These are groups best known by international fans. The first three are actually “families” made up by multiple groups. They look intimidating but if you like their music and have enough free time to sit through more of their content you might find something that’s up your alley. The other three are smaller groups that managed to become top artists thanks to their very unique concepts.

AKB48G & Sakamichi Series: The biggest group (in both sales and actual size) is AKB48 which has their own theater in Tokyo and multiple sister groups all over Japan (SKE48, NMB48, HKT48, NGT48, STU48) and a few overseas. They also have an “official rival group”, Nogizaka46. I would recommend beginning with Nogi’s sister group Keyakizaka46.

Hello! Project: Their 20th anniversary is coming soon and they were THE thing during the early 00′s. Currently made up by Morning Musume.’17 (their founding group), ANGERME, Juice=Juice, Kobushi Factory and Tsubaki Factory (plus multiple trainees named Kenshuusei). Their songs are generally upbeat and you can see the girls grow and improve. From their current lineup I think ANGERME is a good place to start, but if you’re ok with inactive groups, the recently disbanded °C-ute was incredible.

E.g Family: The female counterpart to EXILE TRIBE. Some of the members sing while the rest are dancers/performers only.  It includes a few other groups and projects with E-girls being the main one.

Perfume: From rags to riches. They started as a typical idol group of school girls and went on to become one of j-pop’s biggest acts. Their music is more on the electro side and they work with the same producer as Kyary Pamyupamyu. Their outfits and choreo are always on point and their music videos are aesthetic af.

Momoiro Clover Z: known for their eccentric and over the top concepts. I’m not really into their music but the girls are very charismatic. They also have a few sister groups of their own.

BABYMETAL: The queens of kawaii metal. SU-METAL is a great vocalist but their music is pretty much hit or miss. They began as a sub-unit for Sakura Gakuin which is a more orthodox idol group.

Personal recommendations: these are the groups that I listen on the regular and look out for their releases, ESPECIALLY the first ones (the order is basically based on how much I personally like them).

callme: my babies. They began as a sub-unit to Dorothy Little Happy before becoming independent two years ago. They are a self produced group with the members making the music, writing the lyrics, doing the choreography and designing costumes on their own. (They also get compared to Perfume a lot but other than very general things like the number of members and both groups doing EDM I can’t really see it).

9nine: another group I love (Kanchan is my kamioshi). They began as a more regular idol group in 2005 and saw different line-ups and musical styles for the first years. Then they switched labels and became a “performance girls unit” with a stable line-up (except for a member departure last year). Sadly their current label isn’t very friendly with international fans so their content is harder to find.

Babyraids JAPAN: originally just Babyraids. A bunch of bright children with colorful rock pop songs and lots of energy. Manatsu is an incredible center but all members are precious in their own way.

predia: a more adult idol group. They are very elegant and have really great songs. Basically a group made up of only queens.

Gang Parade: their songs go HARD. They belong to WACK alongside BiS and BiSH.

GEM: the third iDol Street group and my daughters. I consider them a good middle ground between an average k-pop group (in terms of ability) and orthodox idol groups (in terms of cuteness and energy). 

Little Glee Monster: a group focused on vocals. They have cute songs, cute videos, and cute girls with great voices, what else could we ask for. (This post is getting really long I’ll try to be briefer omg).

TOKYO GIRLS’ STYLE: they began as a typical idol group before turning into a EDM-oriented unit. 

PASSPO: they’ve been around for a while, delivering rock pop jams with a flight attendant concept. They also seem like a very tight-knit group.

BiSH: Another WACK group. They’re on the more alternative side of the idol spectrum and their lives are completely crazy. Also Aina is my gf. 

SUPER GiRLS: the first iDol Street group. They’re everything you might expect from an idol group: colorful, energetic, cute.

Fairies: good vocals and dance. I’ve been meaning to catch up with them for years but keep postponing it oops.

Cheeky Parade and Wasuta: the two remaining iDol Street groups, tho I don’t follow them as much as GEM and Supaga tho.

Japan also has a good variety of all-female bands. Here are some that I like and listen to often (tho there’s many more out there). Like the list above they’re more or less in order of personal preference and familiarity:

SCANDAL: actual queens also Rina is my wife.

Gacharic Spin: also queens and the video I linked is THE lesbian anthem.

SHISHAMO: did I mention they’re queens? Asako has the sweetest voice.

FLiP: currently inactive queens when will they come back from war

Silent Siren: a cute group, they will heal your soul.

Akai Ko-en

DOLL$BOXX

yonige

Band-Maid

tricot

Drop’s

Regal Lily

LAZYgunsBRISKY

Finally, a few other artists that either don’t fit on the previous lists but I really wanted to include OR I personally don’t follow but have a decent following overseas:

Polkadot Stingray

Tsuzuri Zukuri

DAOKO

Wednesday Campanella

Inshow-ha

SHE IS SUMMER

Charisma.com

Wagakki Band

FAKY

FEMM

This is only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to Japanese music. Especially for the last part where I tried to focus more on the up and coming acts. My suggestion would be find a few artists that are your style and keep exploring from there! Hope you enjoy, Rushi out.

[cryptidwizard]

A Good Kid.

@yarrayora requested a Casey Jones fic from the point of view of his fellow students and his teachers, I hope you enjoy! Contains some spoilers from tmnt 2012 season 2 and 3

“He’s a good kid!” His parents said with a sheepish smile when Casey was in preschool. The smell of rain still fresh in the air though the showers had stopped. Casey took the opportunity to play in the mud and stomp in puddles, tracking mud inside and dripping wet. The teacher rolled his eyes, “Something like that. That little Arnold Jr. of yours must be a handful.” He commented as Casey now toweled dry barreled into his parents giving them a hug. His parents laughed, and agreed. “He takes after me.” They both say in unison.

In kindergarten during Show and Tell one day, Casey stood up as straight as possible and said in a loud voice he had a big announcement. “Go on Arnold, please tell the class.” His teacher smiled warmly already learning there was no way to control Casey’s excited volume. Casey took a deep breath as if he couldn’t wait to get it out, “I’MGONNABEABIGBROTHER!” he shouted quickly and stumbling over his words. “Can you repeat that hun?” The teacher asked not quite understanding what he said. “I’M GONNA BE A BIG BROTHER! MY MOM SAYS SO, HER TUMMY IS HUGE! ITS GOT A BABY IN IT!! THEY THINK IT’S A GIRL AND SHES GONNA LOOK LIKE ME AND IM GONNA TEACH HER TO ICE SKATE!! WE’RE GONNA PLAY HOCKEY TOGETHER!!! IM GONNA BE THE BEST BIG BROTHER EVER!!!!” Casey exclaimed, practically vibrating in excitement. His teacher gave him a grin, “We are all very happy for you Arnold. I’m sure you’ll be a very good brother, though you might have to wait a few years to teach your little brother or sister how to ice skate.” Casey wilted at the news of waiting for ice skating but brightened once again at the prospect of having a little brother or sister to call his own.

Casey is a good kid and a good older brother. His mom and dad both work so he takes care of his little sister when they have to do “grownup stuff” Casey proudly shares to his classmates. “He’s a responsible kid,” Says one teacher to another during their lunch break gossip time, usually talking about students and things they tell teachers. “If a little excitable.” Another adds.  “Did you hear how his mom is sick a lot? Arnold says that’s because she “helps sick people” but I’m not sure.” The gym teacher reveals. “Well nursing job or not that sounds a lot like an autoimmune disease.” The science teacher mentions. The language arts instructor looks up, “Oh my father had that, it was absolutely awful. He passed a few weeks ago.” The thought of Arnold Casey Jones Jr. disappeared from their thoughts as they offered their condolences.

“Hey Case’ what’s up?” Asked a classmate as Casey concentrated on coloring a Get Well Soon Card in second grade. “Hmm?” He asked as he looked up, “Oh hey, I’m making a card for my mom. She’s not feeling well. It’s just taking a little longer than usual to feel good again.” Casey explained somewhat glumly. “I’m sorry about that. I hope she feels better!” Says the classmate. “Thanks!” Says Casey before adding a quiet “Me too.” A teacher then notices the card and tells Casey she hopes his mom gets well soon. She doesn’t.

The condition of Mrs. Jones hasn’t improved the teachers learn. When Arnold Jr. misses two weeks of school in third grade, everyone knows what happened. The Monday after the second week, Casey enters class, eyes red and glassy and wearing an oversized jacket that teachers can only assume belonged to his mother. He doesn’t speak, he ignores words spoken to him and only pretends to do his work. This continues for a while. At first teachers are able to ignore it and place it on him grieving, but it continues still. When they regretfully have to ask his father to come in to talk about Casey’s grades his father blankly replies, “He’s a good kid.”

In fourth grade, Casey gets into his first fight. Kids can be cruel. They joke and say terrible things, they can’t comprehend the consequences. That is until someone teaches them. Casey taught them. From what the teachers gathered, two kids have been making fun of Casey for a while now. For the longest he hadn’t let it bother him, but they allegedly brought up his mother. Casey had apparently just snapped. Both kids were sporting bruises and Casey had a large scrape on his cheek. He hadn’t spoken since the fight ended aside from the words, “They said mean stuff about my mom…” Casey has sat in infuriated science. “He’s a good kid!” His father pressed, looking disheveled, his shirt incorrectly buttoned up. Arnold Sr. let out a deep sigh, “He hasn’t been handling his mother’s death well, no kid should have to go through this. He hates not being around his sister and I, like he’s scared we’re gonna leave him too. Those kids shouldn’t have been saying that stuff, Arnold shouldn’t have retaliated. Can you please let him off the hook just this once?” Casey’s father pleaded, looking desperate. The teachers pitied what was left of the Jones family, and decided if Casey apologized to the two boys, he’s be off the hook. Casey manages a muttered apology, refusing to meet anyone’s eyes. He stays silent on the way home.

Casey manages to stay out of trouble for the most part in fifth grade. Aside from minor arguments and a generally rambunctious behavior he is fine. He angers easier and is more protective of his friends. Especially his sister. When she started kindergarten, he would walk her to all her classes, usually causing him to be late for his own. When he found out she was being messed with by some older students, Casey was infuriated to stay the least. He threw the first punch and got the shit beaten out of him, but it guaranteed his sister wouldn’t be messed with again. Arnold Sr. shows up fifteen minutes late to the meeting, he smells of alcohol. He doesn’t try to defend Casey’s case, he doesn’t call him a good kid. Just asks “How much trouble is he in?” and is informed Casey has a week’s detention. His father vows Casey will be punished accordingly for his actions, the teacher doesn’t notice Casey’s fearful expression as he leaves with his sister and father.

On the first day of sixth grade, Casey shows up with a black eye. The teacher calls his father, he doesn’t answer. Casey says his dad is busy. He doesn’t say that his father is passed out drunk, he doesn’t say that his father is the one who punched him last night. So the teacher never knows. Casey says he was fixing the lock on his doorknob when his sister had opened the door. “Oh, Arnold I’m so sorry that happened. You should see the nurse and get some ice for that.” His teacher says with sympathy. Casey mumbles something, the teacher frowns “I’m sorry I didn’t hear that dear.” The boy looks down, “I don’t wanna go by Arnold. I wanna be called Casey.” She looks surprised, he hadn’t had a problem with that name during roll call. “Alright, Casey. Let’s get you down to the nurse.” The teacher says with a shrug. She’ll never know the Casey doesn’t want to be constantly reminded of his dad every time he’s referred to. She doesn’t know Casey learns to use his mom’s old makeup to hide bruises.

Casey gets into fights; his father was called in so much they just stop bothering to call. When they do call him, Arnold Sr. doesn’t bother to defend Casey’s actions. He just says “He’s a bad kid, he isn’t going to change. He’ll be punished accordingly.” Always smelling of alcohol and cigarette smoke. Teachers had begun to dread getting Casey in their classes. The plethora of friends Casey used to have had vanished, he scares people. Casey decides to quit on regular old ice skating. He tries out for hockey. He’s a bad kid.

Casey makes friends with people on his hockey team, some still keep their distance. Though Casey’s a natural player and a fun guy to be around. He’s still competitive, still has an anger that can’t be extinguished. To his team, he’s a fun-loving knucklehead that’s got a real angry streak on an off the ice. To teachers he’s a slacker, who only applies himself in hockey, a bad kid with bad anger issues. The only thing that seems to engage him is hockey and fighting, everything else makes him feel stupid or inadequate. So he doesn’t try, so it doesn’t hurt when he fails. Casey is told he’ll be kicked off the hockey team if he doesn’t bring up his grades. He starts to look for a tutor, but who would tutor a notoriously bad kid? Casey tells teachers that no one’s going to want to tutor him, a student craving extra credit for mysteriously missing days disagrees.

Casey hits it off with his tutor, so he says to a nosy teacher. He brags that April O’Neil is “So into him.” April rolls her eyes and laughs, Casey has a friend he finally close to. April first saw Casey as a bad kid, a no brained thug who just wants to fight. When he discovered the criminal underworld and the threat of the Kraang and dons a vigilante costume with a hockey stick; April thinks maybe he’s an okay kid who just wants to fix the city and bust a few heads. Then she truly gets to know him, sees him interacting with the turtles, protecting people he cares about and realizes he’s a good kid, a good person, a good friend who’s been dealt shitty cards in life. She just wishes other people would see the real him under his façade.

When the Kraang invade, many are unaccounted for when humans are enslaved and mutated. Casey Jones, April O’Neil, and Irma Langinstein are three of the many. Teachers and students alike can only hope the three are alive, and pray for their own safety as the mutagen splashes down upon them. The pain and feeling of bones shifting and skin morphing is unlike anything other experienced. The feeling is traumatizing and agonizing but they will forget it all soon enough. There is only serving the Kraang. There is only Kraang.

Casey and April’s trigonometry teacher’s vision clears, everything aches and smells heavily of something alien burning her nose. Above her stands Arnold Casey Jones, his expression concerned and his hand outstretched ready to pull her up. Her memories feel disjointed but they come back slowly. “Casey….Casey Jones..? Where am I? What happened?” She asks woozily and is supported by Casey before she falls. “Don’t worry about that Ma’am. I’m going to get you home safe.” Casey says in calm reassuring tone, there is a flash of light and suddenly they are standing at the entrance of her house. Her memory clears and she gasps, “You’re alive! H-how am I alive?” His teacher asks in confused panic. “The military came through, I’m just doing my part volunteering to help people get home safe.” He soothes. His trigonometry teacher nods half dazed and is helped into her home by Casey. He gives her a hug, tells her to stay safe and is out the door, gently closing it shut behind him. His trigonometry teacher seems stunned, Casey was failing her class in the months before the invasion. She always thought of him as a delinquent, yet here he is volunteering and doing his part in the efforts to help things get back to normal. What a good kid.

A student being harassed by Purple Dragons for his wallet is saved by a hockey mask wearing vigilante clutching a baseball bat. “Casey Jones?!” The teenager asks in surprise. “-Huh?” Says the vigilante before trying to deepen his voice, “Uh no, who’s that?” At the classmate’s look clearly saying he wasn’t buying it, Casey sighed and used his regular voice, “How’d you know it was me?” Casey asked. “Dude you literally shouted, NO ONE MESSES WITH CASEY JONES! While you were beating up those guys.” Casey looked a sheepish as he could while still wearing a hockey mask. “Oh, uh right.” The classmate looked around awkwardly, “Um listen Case’ I just wanted to say thanks dude. You’re actually pretty cool.” The mask wearing boy seems stunned “Yeah no problem, get home safe man.” Casey said before pulling himself up to the nearby fire escape and seemingly vanishing. “Cool.” Whispered the teenager.

Everyone in school has heard stories of students or teachers being saved by April O’Neil or Casey Jones. Sometimes in strange costumes or armor, other times in just everyday clothing. Nobody confronts them on it, or says anything to the police. They feel honor bound, grateful for what Casey and April have done for them. No one thinks of April as a weak and nerdy girl anymore, she’s strong and powerful and a force of nature all her own. No one thinks of Casey as a stupid student and angry thug, he’s protective and crafty and a good kid. He’s always been a good kid.

[zzpopzz]

Really long rant about how I made Vanilla Twilight, I typed it at 2am so it’s kinda crappy and boring, just skip through this post.

So I'd been thinking about it for a long time now, even before finishing Vanilla Twilight that I'd talk about it if someone asked, well that never happened so I was just thinking that I'd let it go but that post is so important to me so well fuck it I'll just talk about it anyway. I did it completely on a wimp like how cool would it be if I make a lyricstuck for Toumaki like I'd be the first (if anyone did this before me im sorry). The first song I intended to do wasn't VT, it was a much shorter and easier song. I saw the music video first time after a while and the lyrics gave me some scenes to draw right away, like the tones, the atmosphere, the lyrics all fit them very well, made me wanted to draw something happy but sad. The ending for it was a happy one instead of a sad one like other songs I did (I didn't post the ending for any of them, just let the viewers decide what it's gonna be) I was very scared like what if it won't turn out ok and people gonna hate me for it or no one even gonna look at it. Also what I visualized are mostly illustrations with backgrounds, what I never done before so high chance it won't go anywhere. I thought well let's just see how far will I get and won't talk about it at all until I post it so at least I won't be all barks no bite. I was very traumatized that someone might know about what I did so I locked all the files when I shut down my PC in case someone hack into it lmao. I started with making a storyboard(kinda) for it, this is where I first got trouble because there was some part I didn't think of when I visualized what I'd draw at first ( 'I don't feel so alone' part mostly and some in between) and it's only at this point that I realized how many I'd have to draw (over 40 images total) and it's mind blowing for someone who rarely finish a painting like me at that time, that number is more than what I'd draw in a year. VT doesn't have choruses that meant I can't do tricks like repeat some panels (I don't like this anyway). I usually painted on small canvas before that but I wanna make sure I can fix things later and some idea I had was pretty big so I used 3000x5000px canvas then trimmed them down ( I didn't know how big it was and it's huge). The idea was to make a tumblr scroll-post like a lyricstuck (my favorites are by paperseverywhere and toastyhat/emptyfeet , they made really cool tutorials about these) so I tried to drew out compositions that would look good scrolling down panel by panel and have some connections between them (this didn't turn out so good in the end because I wasn't good lol) Since I was scared that people might point out that I draw something wrong, it took me almost a week or something searching for references (check my pinterest board) like the streets, sky, houses, roads, outfits, poses,... I was going to draw. I got some knowledge about bikes by this too, like I can tell the differences between road bike, mtb, touring bikes,... I also see and captured bunches of screenshots and reread ywpd trivia countless time to make sure I won't get anything wrong. If you take notice, every outfit Toumaki wear in there are all canon, from anime or promos. The first few panels was really exciting because I had never painted so many with backgrounds before, I was really happy when I almost finished the first verse even compared to the full 3:50 of the song it was only 20 seconds and I thought maybe I can pull this after all. The last panel was intended to be Makichan standing infront of his house looking at the sky but I wanted to show the sky at the end of the panel and that wouldn't work on scroll-down post so I had to leave it for later, I repainted this panel for about 3 times and finished it just 30' before posting. The first panel of the second verse wasn't turning out alright too because that was my first time doing a 3 points perspective drawing and the colors didn't turn out as I wanted either (my intention was a green/gold dawn scene). Things kinda worked well despite that until the scene when Toudou sits in his ink, gdi I didn't know why I was so caught up in that and painted every piece of that wooden floor, it took me almost a week but turned out better than I expected so I was ok with it. I was going to make sketchy paintings for all of the panel but I did too much details on that one so it gave me the impression that I'll have to do just as much for every others. Now I still had school to go and that semester my uni got me pretty crappy schedule that made me have to wait for classes at school frequently, I was frustrated because I didn't get to paint during that time and I might finish it too late (even though I didn't set a deadline) and when I got home I just spent so much time checking twitter and just can't pick myself up to draw and ended up feeling shitty about it. *Side story*  I was so mad because I didn't get anything done and there's still more than half of the whole thing to do and the worst part is that I had no one that I can talk to because I didn't have any friend who ship Toumaki and I also don't want to publicly talk about what I was doing, I wanted to surprise people when I'm done, I didn't wanna give people the expectation then screw it up (I literally thought I'd drop a bomb not a grenade lmao) I can't remember how long was that shitty phase but I felt like it was so long, I barely finished verse 2 at that point. I was so mad at myself and my progress so I spent a few days to look at time management threads and this helped a lot, I changed my habits completely  by this and I still apply those methods now, like I used to stay up til 3am to read fics (bless you writers you fueled me with your writings bless you all) then I switch to bed before 12 and get up early for a good start or reduce working time while increasing quality* After that I kinda got things together,I just went ahead with painting tho it's still kinda tiring, I had to work on 5 essays during this time too. At this point I was like screw all, I give no shit about what everyone thinks I'm just gonna finish this and get some good nap (I practiced power nap to get more focus time for painting but dude everyone wants a good long nap) 10 days before uploading I found out that there's a Toumaki day (I'm so sorry), I was going to posted on the first sunday of June (I did researched on which was the best time to post on social medias so I randomly picked a sunday) and Toumaki day is the last sunday of May, that meant I had 10 days left and 15 panels to paint! I was going to ignore that but I already made it big I should make it right too so I shit my pants going through those last panels. I purposely hiding Toudou's face till the last verse to emphasize the feelz and got so relieved that I finally got to paint him (I read some tags that some viewers got emotional at this part so I'm so glad it worked). The whole things was put under Makichan's perspective so I was so sick of painting him at that point, he showed up in every panel and I can't paint him ugly because he's beautiful (especially his hair, I spent shitload of time painting them). I can talk lots about why I picked to do so but that's headcanon shit and it's embarrassing so let's just skip that. The last day I had only 3 panels left and I was hell confident that I've got this and somehow spent the whole evening rewatch Toumaki pingpong ep (end me). Of course that didn't end well, I managed to finish those by midnight but I still had like 3 panels that needed  repaint completely and all 43 needed retouch and edits. My plan was to post at 9am sunday (thats 9pm saturday est) so I had to get up at 5am and finish all that, I ended up cutting down 2 panels and simplified the instrumental panel (some tags said that was nice so I was at least relieved). Unlike other songs I did, the length of every line's quite different and the original sizes I did would make viewers have to scroll slower or faster at different parts. I didn't plan this beforehand and had to trim down some panels even the parts that I really liked and spent lots of time on. I also found out that people outside the homestuck fandom might not familiar with this type of post so I made a video too (I’m sorry I have zero skill in editing). After posting I was terrified of people's reactions or worse, there won't be any reaction so I turned everything off and went to sleep and woke up with an unimaginable number of notes I'd got, I set the target of 500 notes and I really didn't think that I'd get past that number like maybe 2-300 (well my other songs didnt even get 200), at the end I got 5000. I spent the next week reading and screencap tags given in reblogs, I put them on desktop and they're still my motivation til now. Vanilla Twilight is the thing I'm proud of the most even until now, when I've done other songs and projects that look somewhat better. If I have to recommend one thing on my blog I'd recommend it despite its' unskilled paneling, poor composition and muddy colors. It was the first time in my life that I'd put so much effort into something and went through such emotional roller coaster, the feelings I put into it was raw and the idea was very original compared to other songs, I improved and changed a lot during the 2 months I spent on it and never once regret doing it. ***Anyway, you sure have much free time to read it this far, here's a little game for you: I put random things in VT and HF like some characters/stuff from other series, my ocs,... (there wasn't anything purposeless in there even the logo on their cups or the bags they wear) just send me anything you find and I'll draw you something in return**

[sasstrid-and-dorkcup]

Starco Fic: Not Without Her

IT TOOK ME A WHOLE WEEK BUT I THOUGHT ABOUT THE FINALE AND I HAVE AN ANGST FILLED EMOTIONAL MARCO FIC FOR YALL I HOPE YOU LOVE IT BC IM TRASH

Title: Not Without Her

Summary: Star has just left Earth, quite possibly forever. And Marco is having a hard time accepting that.

Rating: K

Words: 1977

FFN

A few minutes have passed.

Marco was still standing in what used to be Stars bedroom door, gawking inside it.

It was empty. Changed back to what it used to be. It was just a solemn reminder to the boy that his best friend was now gone, possibly forever, and he may never know why.

For the first few moments, Marco felt like he was paralyzed. Like he couldn't do anything but stand in the doorway and gawk at the empty room. After those minutes passed, however, his mind began to process what had just happened.

Star had left. She took all her belongings with her. She was just...gone.

He took a few steps into the room. In the year that Star had been here, he had forgotten what the room had looked like before she had magically changed it. He looked around at how plain and boring it was. This room used to be filled with color, with magic, with...Star's life. And now it was gone...

Star was gone.

Marco felt his legs give out and he fell to the floor. As soon as he sat down, his mind became flooded with thoughts. He couldn’t stop thinking about what his life would be like now that she was no longer in it. Now that she wouldn’t around to bring some sort of feeling of purpose or importance to his life.

Marco's thoughts were interrupted by a voice behind him.

"Hey, Marco, are you okay?"

Marco turned his head to see Jackie standing in the doorway.

"Oh...uh...I don't know...I..." Marco sighed and lowered his head. "No I'm not."

Jackie came in and sat down next to him, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“I know you probably miss her a lot. Star was super cool, and everyone at Echo Creek is going to miss her.” Jackie didn’t really know what to say beyond that. To be honest, a part of her was getting worried about how Marco may feel about Star, considering what she had just confessed to Marco.

“I miss her like crazy. She hasn’t been gone for more than ten minutes, but I already feel horrible thinking of having to live my life without her around.”

Jackie sighed. She was about to say something she didn’t really want to say, but she knew that for Marco’s sake, it had to be said.

“Are you sure you guys are just friends?”

Marco looked up at her, shocked.

“Wh…what….what do you mean?!” He stuttered, very confused; not about the question, necessarily, but about the fact that he didn’t know how to really answer it.

“I mean, you and Star seem to have a really special connection. I’ve noticed that every time we hang out, every single time we’ve kissed, you interrupted it because of Star. Everyone has seen how happy you are whenever she’s around…it just seems like there’s something more there that maybe you’re not seeing.” Jackie explained.

Marco’s mind was so busy thinking about this that his expression was blank. He didn’t even know what to say to that. He didn’t understand anything anymore.

“Look, I can tell you’re confused and there’s a lot to process, so I’ll leave you alone for a while.”

Jackie stood up and headed for the door. She paused in the doorway and turned back to face Marco. She took a deep breath before speaking; what she was about to say was going to be hard to say. It was going to be a bit hard for him to hear, but she thought it was something he may need to hear.

“Maybe if she has these feelings for you, it’s for the best that she left.”

She hesitated a moment, lowering her head before she left. She didn’t want to say it, because it was only a small part of her that thought that, but she could tell he needed to hear it, even if it was so he could realize that it was the furthest thing from the truth.

As she walked downstairs and said a quick goodbye to Marco’s parents, she couldn’t help but let a few tears fall. She could tell Marco had very strong feelings for Star, and even if he didn’t realize it, he had been in love with her for a long time. Jackie was beginning to sense that she was standing in between the two, and that was the last thing she wanted to do.

Saying what she said to Marco…as bad as it felt to say, she knew that it might be what she had to say to push Marco away from her and closer to Star.

Marco’s eyes widened as he looked over to where Jackie had been standing just moments ago. Her words bounced around wildly in his head.

Maybe it’s for the best that she left.

It couldn’t be true. There was no way that was true. How would it even be possible that his life was better without Star Butterfly?

Marco sighed and laid down on the floor, dismally staring at the ceiling. He moved his head to look around at the rest of the room, taking in just how plain and boring it looked. There wasn’t a single sign left that there had ever been a magical princess from another dimension living here.

A few hours passed as Marco laid still on the floor, letting all the thoughts that were rattling around in his brain attempt (and fail) to sort themselves out.

~

After several hours, Marco heard a knock at the door. He stood up rather quickly in excitement, thinking that maybe, just maybe, it was possible that Star had come back to talk to him. When his eyes turned to the door, however, he realized that it was just his parents, their faces laced with concern.

“Oh…” He murmured. “It’s just you guys.” Marco slumped over onto the bed and laid down. Angie and Rafael exchanged worried looks before sitting next to Marco on the bed.

“Honey, are you okay?” Angie asked. She knew he wasn’t, but she didn’t know what else to say.

Hours of sulking and processing what had happened must have finally started to sink in for the boy, because as soon as his mother’s words hit his ears, he broke down and began to sob.

“NO! NO I’M NOT! My best friend in the entire world just left me, and I don’t know why!” Marco bawled.

Angie immediately pulled Marco onto her lap, placing a caring hand on his back, and another on his head, stroking his hair gently. The feeling of his mother’s touch, however comforting, couldn’t soothe the boy’s tears.

Minutes passed as Marco wept in his mother’s lap. Rafael placed a hand on Marco’s back as well, but they both knew that no amount of comforting was going to make him feel better (that didn’t mean that they were ever going to stop, though).

After several minutes, Marco shifted his head so he could speak.

“I just…she just…she…said th..that…” Marco said, in between sobbing gasps. “a..and left…”

“And…I don’t even know how I feel anymore…” Marco took a deep breath. He took a moment to calm down a little before he kept talking.

“How could she expect me to be okay, after running to me so suddenly and telling me that ‘she’s in danger and has to leave Earth forever’? After confessing her…her crush on me…” Marco found that part hard to say. He had to pause before he dared to explain the part that was even worse.

“How could she just say all of that to me, and just…just leave?!”

After he managed to angrily spit out the words “just leave”, he broke out in tears once again, his head retreating to his mother’s lap.

Angie sighed and continued running her hand through his hair.

“Marco, honey, we know you miss her. We miss her too. But we’ve always know that this day would come. We knew she would have to go back to Mewni someday. She’s a princess, sweetie, she probably has a lot of responsibilities back home.”

She knew it wasn’t going to be very helpful, but it was the best she could manage at the moment.

Marco only continued to sob. Truthfully, he had never really considered that before. Maybe he had thought about it during the first few weeks of their friendship, but somehow, they had gotten so close so fast, that he ended up pushing that thought permanently out of his mind.

He pushed it out of his mind because he knew he couldn’t bear the thought of Star not being there.

Angie and Rafael were growing ever more concerned. They knew their son felt strongly for Star, but they never thought it would hurt this much for him to see Star leave. Of course, they missed her a lot too; she had begun to feel like a daughter to them. But they had seen exchange students come and go before, and they knew they’d be okay, and would eventually grow used to not having her around anymore (or, at least, that’s what they told themselves).

It was beginning to seem like nothing would console their son; nothing except seeing Star again. They didn’t want Marco to just disappear into another dimension and walk into whatever danger waited on that other world, though, so they began thinking of things that they could possibly say to get him to stay here.

“Sweetie, I hate to say this, but maybe it had to be this way. Whatever is happening back on Mewni, I’m sure it’s very important. Mewni probably needs Star a lot right now. Maybe it’s best this way, honey.”

Marco’s mother’s words managed to calm him down. His tears faded, leaving red, puffy cheeks in their wake. Angie’s words bounced around in his head for a moment before they really struck him.

Marco suddenly shot up in surprise, his eyes widening. Her words had reminded him of what Jackie had said earlier.

Maybe it’s for the best that she left.

His eyebrows scrunched together as a feeling of anger took him over. The more he thought about it, the more it angered him. It couldn’t be further from the truth.

“NO!” He shouted. His sudden shout took his parents by surprise.

“That’s not true! My life isn’t any better without Star around, it’s worse! Do I look any happier without her around? DO I?!”

Marco found himself incredibly angry, and he didn’t completely understand why. All he knew was that he wanted people to stop telling him to try to think that his life would be improved now that Star was gone.

His parents didn’t know how to react. They realized that that was probably the wrong thing to say, and they didn’t know how to fix it.

Marco was silent for a moment as he turned away from his parents and angrily folded his arms.

“Look, I’m sorry for snapping like that. I just…I think I just wanna be alone for a while.”

Marco sighed and shuffled off to his own bedroom.

He was about to lay down on his bed and cry himself to sleep, when he glanced over at his desk.

That’s when he saw his dimensional scissors sitting there, gleaming as the moonlight shone through his window, hitting them just right.

He furrowed his brows as a thought struck him.

He hesitated for a moment.

Am I really about to do this?

He took a deep breath. Yes, he thought, yes I am.

He quickly opened the drawer of his desk and grabbed a piece of paper and a pen.

I can’t stay here anymore. Not without her. -Marco

With the note sitting on top of his computer, Marco cut open a portal to Mewni. He took one last look around his room before walking through it.

[mama-forum-ch-blog]

aSiAme

New Post has been published on http://mama-forum.ch/question/asiame-2/

aSiAme

Should blacks date whites

this will depend on the course. If you’re playing a busy nchampionship caliber course and you’re simply a 30 handicap hacker, Don’t play the champion tees, Nwhatever color that they’re. It will slow down play for anyone. you will discover, On friday afternoon nat West Fencepost Municipal, hits the mark is most serious hazard is those hot dogs that go nround and around on the weenie treadmill, There’s no reason not to knock yourself out. m.

NIn other words, Use comman sense. Stand on the back tee at the foremost and tenth and ask yourself nif it looks like fun or torture. If the scorecard lists the rating and slope of every rep,in between each nof tees, Use it as helpful tips. if for example slope is under 113 (and that is essentially average), do it now. NSlopes a lot more than, for example, 130 are for pretty motivated golfers. NAnd if you get four holes in and discover you made a mistake, enhance. ( Full pickup )

thanks to the fact black guys date white women..

method.

I wonder who asked this enquiry? Maybe its since they are fun, they will cook, he or she can dance, and perhaps they are good in bed. capable handle that? there are various reasons why people date other people besides their own race. there isn’t one specific answer, But many honest ones. And it goes for every race. And im not vibrant, Nor african american. I am a puerto rican females. Jajaja.

Lol maybe its very similar to what black women say about white women all the black men are with white women so why not take the white guys=))) ( Full manage )

If you want a White girl and a Black one who should you?

You ought to decide whoever turns you on the most and who has the beliefs and character traits that align closest to what you value most. A little difference in those techniques is good, As it keeps things cool, But too much difference may cause huge arguments later. Leave sex out of it since you won’t be able to think objectively once emotions get into the image. That is why normally, folks don’t have sex until marriage and have one year engagements. like this, although dating, You can look for spiritual match-ups, And while engaged you’d look for emotional matchup. After wed, confidently, You should be physically compatible along. But many couples do it in overturn order. They see who turns them on sexually and then speedily turn to physical attraction. They assume for emotions that they may just fight things out as the time arises, and they do. Then they never make time to see if they are spiritually compatible and share the deepest core beliefs. That concept doesn’t usually work. ( Full treatment )

Do white men date black most women?

not, Me and my white friends sort of see it as taboo and if my friend was dating a black chick i gives him SO MUCH $% for it and I’m not even sure why. Its not even the interracial thing as much as it is just the cultural differences between black women and black men. The white men I know who marry black women do so because they do not give a crap about race. They such as woman, Find her attractive and pleasant to be around, And fall in love. Cultural differences abound in every marriage, it does not matter “run, I’m married to a man who grew up 4000 miles from the me. He forces me nuts, oftentimes, along with stupid accent, And his elbows on the table, And his passion of bowling. But I’m crazy fond of him. ( Full way around the problem )

What should a black women who grow up in a very dysfuntional famly and has only dated white men would a black man be more idea her childhood or does it not matter?

I’m sure it’s possible that a black man can relate more to your family and cultural environment, But that doesn’t mean that black men are more suited to you if you prefer white men. The right man is offered, Be he black or white or whichever race, And you shouldn’t settle for anything less than a man who truly loves you for who you are deep inside your soul. ( Full response )

Should you date the man you’re dating if he is black and you are white and your parents do not approve?

I do not think it really matters what the skin color is. You could be purple and he could be orange and it still wouldn’t matter. Just because somebody looks different on the outside of does nothin to reflect how they are on the inside. Don’t always try to make your mother and father approve of them. If they see that he makes you happy then that’s all that will matter I have similar situation as you. I am women and My boyfriend is white. His parent don’t approve me because I have 2 kids but mostly i know to expect my race. The way my boyfriend told me that his parent told him that i am hunting for a baby daddy to support and think he gonna get me pregnant and using his money which is I AM NOT. to expect LOVE thats all. This is bothering me. ( Full say )

Can vibrant guys date black girls?

obviously, no matter, It only matters if they show you the way you should prepare be treated and respected. Problems will exist as much as people think questions like this need answers I don’t see why not. Do as you please and know that at least a person (us all) Isn’t knowing you. ( Full pick up )

exactly why do people black men date white women?

towards the White Women often treat Black Men better, And will usuallygive them the time; Not expecting Money, Or choice thingslike most Black Women do. Black Men want a romantic relationship with aFamily, And aside from having appreciable lower Abortion Ratesthan Black Women, White Women will be more approachable, truly asShallow, Materialistic and is always to be able to make sacrifices,Doing the required steps to make her man Happy. ( Full respond )

Should I get Pokemon ranger 3 or Pokemon non colored documents?

Pokemon white or black have brand new Pokemon over 150. you should getting black or white maybe both. In the end it is what you truly what you look for best. It depends an advanced ranger fan or an adventure that you can trade and connect with your other Pokemon games. ( Full best solution )

Which starter should you pick in Pokemon monochrome?

It really depends on your decision and what other Pokemon you’veplanned for your team. The Striation City Gym Leader’s main Pokemon come up with a typeadvantage. If you use Snivy, You’ll battle the hearth monkeyPansear, If determine on Tepig you’ll battle the water monkey Panpourand if determine on Oshawott you’ll battle the grass monkey Pansage,You can get a monkey of one’s by talking to the old lady in theDreamyard, She provides the one that is weak to your StarterPokemon’s type but has the advantage against the Gym Leader’sPokemon, You can get your monkey before your Gym battle so it willbe very useful and in the case of the monkey that you will get; Ifyou chose Snivy you have access to the water monkey Panpour, If youchoose Tepig then you’ll get the grass monkey Pansage and if youchoose Oshawott require get the fire monkey Pansage. One recommendation in regards to the choice of Starter is Oshawottsince it can learn all of the water HMs and it has balanced statson Attack and Defense. Another opinion This depends on variety of battler you are. All 3 opt for a combinedbase stat of 550 (True along with Starter Pokemon of allGenerations). The grass types are good for regular Attack andreally good for Speed, The fire types are good for HP and Speed butare really good for regular Attack and the water types’ stats arepretty much evenly divided apart from Special Attackwhich is very high. The cons of each include this amazing. Thegrass types have low Defense and Special Defense additionally verylow HP, The fire types have low Defense and very low SpecialAttacks and the water types stats are not very special with theexception of the Special Attack so if you want regular Attack statswith very high Speed then you should go for the grass type, If youwant HP and Speed with very high regular Attack stats then youshould go with fire types and if you need very high Special Attacksand the other stats not very high then you should go with [url=http://www.digitaljournal.com/pr/3417037]asiaMe[/url] watertypes. Here are the exact base stats for each Starter in relation to theirtypes Grass Type HP=70, Attack=100, Defense=85, very special Attack=90, [url=https://twitter.com/asiamereview]AsiaME[/url] SpecialDefense=85, Speed=120 Fire type in HP=100, Attack=120, Defense=85,certain Attack=60, SpecialDefense=90, Speed=95 Water write HP=85, Attack=80, Defense=85, original Attack=130, SpecialDefense=80, Speed=90 and the exact base stats for the Starters in grayscale are asfollows: Snivy HP=45, Attack=45, Defense=55, individual Attack=45, specific Defense=55and Speed=63 Tepig HP=65, Attack=63, Defense=45, out of the ordinary Attack=45, extra Defense=45and Speed=45 Oshawott HP=55, Attack=55, Defense=45, important Attack=63, memorable Defense=45and Speed=45. ( Full take )

Should government entities stop the racism between blacks and whites?

n’, The government should not actively stop any racism between blacks and whites or any other race as one should be free to form their own thoughts and opinions. Whenever someones racism goes for to infringe on the rights of others, That’s another story and is unlawful in the US. ______ Improved I’m really sure that all 3 starters stats add up in total are indifferent. Tepig has good proceeds too but, many of them are Fighting. the otter is good, yet the moves sucks but, Can learn very great moves out of the HMs/TMs. i’d personally choose Snivy. Snivy stats are good. i would recommend either Snivy, Or Tepig to the starter! ( Full solve ).

[surveys-by-kellykinsss]

012

The last person you kissed treat you right? He treats me amazingly. 

Would you be shocked if the last person you had feelings for texted you? I mean we’re getting married in June so I certainly hope he has feelings for me. Is this upcoming year going to be a good one for you? So far I have no complaints.  What if you had a baby with the last person you texted? As long as I don’t have to physically birth said baby I’d be fine with that

Who knows your biggest secrets? I don’t really have any secrets. 

Do you care if people hate you for no reason? In a way I’d like to know the reason so I could better myself if need be but at the same time there is always gonna be someone that doesn’t like you and that’s just fine.

Are you in a good mood? Yes, it has gotten much better since being home from work.  Does it bother you when people respond with one word texts? Only if it’s something that requires more.  Are you starting to realize anything? Nah. Did you have braces? No. My dentist told my parents I should get them but it never happened.  Have you ever ran from your own parents? Yep, ran away a few times. 

Are you afraid of clowns? Nope.

Is there someone you are dying to see? Stephen.

Do you have any hickeys on you? Nope. Are you currently looking forward to anything? Moving to California. 

Is your hair long enough to put in a ponytail? Lol, no. Is love worth fighting for? For the right person it is.  Is there anyone you wish you could be spending time with right now? STEPHEN! Will this Friday be a good one? I really hope so. After I get off work I’m taking my dog to the vet because she hasn’t had any energy at all the last week. Could you picture yourself getting married and having kids? Married: Absolutely. Kids: Sure, as long as I don’t have to get pregnant.  What is your current mood? Content.  Did the last person you kissed name start with a J, C, B, I, R, S, Q, L or A? Yep Who last poked you on Facebook? Sarah. Is it harder to be rejected or to reject someone else? For me it’s harder to be rejected. What did you fall asleep thinking about last night? I’m not sure.

Who is someone who puts up with you no matter what? Stephen.

Last person to call you? My general manager. Ever been told “it’s not you, it’s me”? Yes. Do you like to take walks? Yes.

Were you happy when you woke up today? I mean I didn’t want to get up but I wasn’t necessarily upset. 

When was the last time you cried? The other day. I’ve been really worried about my dog. 

Can you honestly say you’re okay right now? Yes. What are you planning on doing after this? Stephen and I are gonna skype.  Do you crack your knuckles? Sometimes. Will tomorrow be better than today? It’s my day off so definitely. 

Is there a girl you would do anything for? Yes.

Is there a boy you would do anything for? Yes.

Who IMed you on facebook last? My co-worker. 

What were you doing at 4am? Sleeping. Have you ever liked someone who treated you badly? Unfortunately. Are you a jealous person? I try not to be but sometimes I can’t help it. 

Hate the last person you kissed? Nope.

Are you someone who hates to read? Nope.

When was the last time you went in the car past midnight? I’m not sure. It’s been quite a while. 

What was the last thing you ate? Baked ziti. Who was the last person to text you? Stephen. How is your hair? Really short.

Could things possibly get any better? There’s always room for improvement. What color shirt are you wearing? Light blue. How important are looks to you? Not very.

Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? Because he was flying back home. Is your hair longer than your shoulders? Lol, no. The shirt you’re wearing, does anyone else have it? Probably. What was the last movie you watched? I watched a little bit of Tarzan the other night. 

Did you straighten your hair this morning? I have literally never straightened my hair. Who would you like your next “fling” to be with? Nobody. Is any part of your body sore? My foot is sore. Do you like the rain? I do. When you cry, do your eyes change colors? I have no idea.

Were your last two kisses with the same person? Mhm. Will you be in a relationship in the next couple months? I hope to be in this relationship for the rest of my life.  Do you have trust issues? Yes and no.  Have you been kissed by someone with the name starting with J, B, C, or S? Just S.  Do you have alcohol in your house? No. Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette? Yes. Have you ever woken up next to someone and were freaked out? Nope. You’re locked in a room with the person you last kissed, any problems? Nope. Would you ever get a tattoo? I want to get a matching otter tattoo with Stephen. Could you see yourself dropping out of high school? I nearly did drop out. My counselor talked me into getting my GED though.    Have you ever kissed someone who smokes? Yes, my ex did.  What are you listening to at this moment in time? Nothing. How are you wearing your hair? My hair is like an inch long so it’s just kinda there doing it’s own thing.  If you were paid 1 million dollars to spend the night in a supposed haunted house, would you? Depends if I’m alone or not. If I’m alone FUCK NO. 

Do you think you can last in a relationship for five months? I’ve been in my current relationship for over 2.5 year. 

Did you ever kiss someone with a tattoo? No.  When is the last time you were at a beach? When Stephen was here back in January. 

Think back to October, were you with someone? Yep.

[loverapture-blog1]

obviously.

I BECAME DEPRESSED WHEN I WAS THIRTEEN YEARS OLD WAITING FOR THIS ONE GIRL TO LOVE ME BACK FOR ABOUT A YEAR AND A HALF AND WHILE MY PARENTS AND TEACHERS AND PEERS PRESSURED ME TO IMPROVE MY GRADES SO I COULD GET INTO A STUPID CATHOLIC SCHOOL THAT I REALLY FUCKING HATE NOW BUT OH WELL. I HARMED MYSELF FOR THE FIRST TIME WHEN I WAS 14 AND I REALLY WANTED TO DIE AND I WOULD'VE KILLED MYSELF IF MY FRIEND HADN'T FOUND OUT AND TALKED ME OUT OF IT. WE'RE NOT REALLY CLOSE ANYMORE. WE DISAGREE ON A LOT OF THINGS. MY MOM TOLD ME LOTS OF HORRIBLE THINGS ABOUT BEING A DISGRACE AND A MISTAKE AND UNLOVABLE AND THAT REALLY HURT MY HEART. MY MOM HASN'T BEEN THE SAME EVER SINCE. SOMETHING REALLY CHANGED INSIDE OF HER AND I MISS HER SO MUCH. FRESHMAN YEAR WAS SO WEIRD CAUSE PEOPLE LIKED ME AND IT WAS PRETTY COOL I HAD A COUPLE GIRLFRIENDS IT WAS ALRIGHT BUT THEN I GOT REALLY REALLY SAD CAUSE THE SECOND GIRLFRIEND TOLD ME SHE JUST WANTED TO USE SOMEONE AND I MEANT NOTHING TO HER AND I WAS JUST AN EASY TARGET BECAUSE I'M YOUNGER THAN HER BUT I MEAN WHATEVER RIGHT? ALSO MY PARENTS SEPARATED. MY DAD WENT TO SOME CLAUSTROPHOBIC APARTMENT THAT FELT LIKE THE THROAT OF AN ANACONDA. I STILL REMEMBER THE SMELL OF IT. THE SIGHT OF NOTHING IN THE PANTRY BUT SOME OLD GATORADE AND TORTILLAS. WORST 9 1/2 MONTHS OF MY LIFE. I HATED IT. I WANTED TO MAKE MY DAD HAPPY AND HANG OUT WITH HIM AND STUFF BUT I WAS SO FUCKING DEPRESSED OH MY GOODNESS I WANTED TO SCREAM ALL THE TIME BUT IT FELT LIKE MY THROAT WAS FILLED WITH COTTON. I DID NOTHING BUT STAY IN MY ROOM ON MY LAPTOP. AND MY DAD NEVER COMPLAINED. HE WAS FINE WITH IT. AS LONG AS I WAS IN HIS HOME. MY HEART HURT SO FUCKING HORRIBLY BAD. IT STILL DOES. THE GUILT. I SAW HIM CRY. MANY TIMES. IT HURTS SO MUCH TO THINK ABOUT. I WAS ALL HE REALLY WANTED THEN AND THERE AND I DECIDED TO DO NOTHING BUT STAY IN MY ROOM. ALL I DID IN THAT ROOM WAS EAT PIZZA, DRINK ARIZONAS, PLAY VIDEOGAMES, JACK OFF, AND CRY, CRY A LOT. THEN AT LIKE ELEVEN AT NIGHT HE WOULD TELL ME "HE'S GONNA HANG OUT WITH HIS OLD DOCTOR FRIEND AT STARBUCKS" YEAH OKAY DAD SURE. I KNEW MY DAD HAD BEEN CHEATING ON MY MOM. I GUESS HE THOUGHT HE COULD JUST LEAVE MY MOM AND THEN GO OFF TO SOME OTHER LADY. BUT IT DIDN'T WORK OUT. THEN MY BEST FRIEND BECAME MY GIRLFRIEND. THEN MY PARENTS GOT BACK TOGETHER. MY GRADES WERE ALRIGHT. I WAS GOING TO THE GYM REGULARLY. EVERYTHING SEEMED OKAY. BUT THEN MY GIRLFRIEND AND I KEPT ARGUING AND SHE KEPT LYING AND I KEPT FALLING FOR IT AND FALLING FOR IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN AND I JUST KINDA WENT ALONG WITH IT. I CRIED A LOT. SHE MADE EVERYTHING WORSE. I STARTED DOING BAD IN MY CLASSES. EVENTUALLY I BROKE UP WITH HER CAUSE I COULDN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. SHE THEN WENT AND TOLD A BUNCH OF PEOPLE THAT I CHEATED ON HER WITH SOME GIRL FROM TEXAS. THE GIRL IS REAL. THE STORY ISN'T. EVENTUALLY I DID FALL IN LOVE WITH THAT GIRL. I BECAME HER MANAGER CAUSE SHE WANTED TO BE A SINGER. THAT WAS THE FIRST TIME I COULD CONFIDENTLY SAY I WAS IN LOVE. SHE WAS A DREAM. PERFECT. SHE SANG ME SONGS AND WROTE ME POEMS. I WAS SO CRAZY ABOUT HER. IT WAS PERFECT. SHE WAS GONNA VISIT ME DURING SUMMER. THEN I FOUND OUT SHE WAS TALKING TO SOMEONE ELSE. THEN SHE KEPT FUCKING WITH MY FEELINGS. I BECAME FRIENDS WITH THE GIRL FROM FRESHMAN YEAR WHO USED ME. I TOLD HER I WANTED TO KILL MYSELF AND SHE IGNORED ME BECAUSE "SHE GOT BORED". THEN I LEFT THE GIRL I WAS IN LOVE WITH BECAUSE I COULDN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE. SHE CONTINUED TO TRY AND TALK TO ME. THEN SHE STARTED SOME FAKE RUMORS ABOUT ME BEING SEXIST AND RACIST. THEN A BUNCH OF PEOPLE HATED ME. SHE'S A TERRIBLE PERSON. I HOPE SHE IS OK. SHE'S BEEN THROUGH A LOT. THE SONGS OF THAT TIME KEEP REPLAYING IN MY HEAD, EATING AWAY AT THE INSIDE OF MY SKULL LIKE WAVES ERODING A MOUNTAIN. MY CHEST FEELS LIKE IT'S GONNA EXPLODE AND YELLOW PAINT IS GONNA SPLASH EVERYWHERE. THE COLOR YELLOW REMINDS ME OF HER. SKATING REMINDS ME OF HER. PLAYING INSTRUMENTS. WRITING. FLOWERS. MUSIC. EVERYTHING REMINDS ME OF HER. I TRIED TO MOVE ON. I STILL HAVEN'T COMPLETELY GOTTEN OVER IT. THEN I MET THIS OTHER GIRL. SHE WAS SO CUTE. SHE WAS WONDERFUL IT FELT SO NICE. SHE LIVED IN SACRAMENTO AND WAS SUPPOSED TO COME DOWN AND VISIT ME SOON. THEN I WENT TO EUROPE FOR THREE WEEKS. DURING THE FIRST WEEK OF BEING IN EUROPE THIS NEW GIRL GOT A BOYFRIEND. MY HEART HURT. I MET A REALLY COOL GIRL IN EUROPE. SHE WAS FROM LOS ANGELES AND WE CLICKED. WE WOULD TRY TO GET ALCOHOL EVERY  NIGHT AND GET SHITFACED. IT WAS SO FUN. ONE TIME IN SWITZERLAND I GOT REALLY DRUNK AND THREW UP AND CHIPPED MY TOOTH TRYING TO OPEN A BEER BOTTLE AND MR. BRUNNER SAW ME DRUNK BUT DIDN'T CARE. I LIKED HER AT FIRST BUT THEN WE JUST BECAME FRIENDS. THEN I TOLD HER ABOUT MY MENTAL ILLNESSES. I OPENED UP ABOUT ALL MY DEMONS. THAT WAS THE LAST TIME I EVER TALKED TO HER. SHE LEFT ME AND TOLD ME I'M TOO MUCH OF A RESPONSIBILITY. SHE SAID I'M "TROUBLED". THAT REALLY FUCKING HURT. THAT SAME NIGHT I MET A BEAUTIFUL GIRL FROM A GERMAN SCHOOL BUT SHE WAS THE ONLY AFRICAN GIRL THERE. WE SPENT ALL NIGHT HOLDING HANDS AND RUNNING AROUND. IT WAS SO SWEET AND DREAMLIKE. THEN I MET THIS OTHER GIRL TOWARDS THE END OF THE TRIP. WE HUNG OUT TOGETHER ALL THE TIME. SHE HAD JUST GRADUATED FROM THE SHITTY CATHOLIC SCHOOL THAT I GO TO RIGHT NOW. SHE THOUGHT I WAS SO COOL. I THOUGHT SHE WAS SO CUTE. WE GOT DRUNK ON THE BEACH OF ATHENS AND STEPPED ON SEA URCHINS. SHE ADMITTED SHE LIKED ME. SHE DIDN'T REMEMBER THAT THE NEXT MORNING THOUGH. THEN WE WENT ON A CRUISE IN THE GREEK ISLANDS. WE NAPPED TOGETHER A LOT. WE CUDDLED. WE GOT MANICURES TOGETHER AND GOT MATCHING NAIL POLISH. I WAS SO HAPPY. SHE DREW IN MY JOURNAL. ON THE LAST DAY, WE BOUGHT SOME CHEAP WINE AND WAITED UNTIL NIGHT. WE GOT SUPER DRUNK AND THEN WE GOT ON TOP OF EACH OTHER. "DON'T KISS ME UNTIL WE'RE SOBER" SHE SAID. I OBLIGED. SHE DIDN'T FOLLOW HER OWN RULES THOUGH. SHE KISSED ME. I KISSED HER BACK. I WAS HER FIRST KISS. WE MADE OUT. WE DID SOME OTHER STUFF. I TOOK HER TO HER ROOM. I SLEPT SMELLING HER SHIRT ALL NIGHT. I AM CRYING RIGHT NOW TYPING THIS. THEN WE SPENT THE WHOLE NEXT DAY TRAVELING BACK. SHIP. BUS. PLANE. THE FIRST PLANE RIDE WAS BEAUTIFUL. WE SAT TOGETHER AND KISSED AND CUDDLED. IT WAS TEN HOURS BUT FELT LIKE ONE. THE NEXT  PLANE WAS SHIT. MY STOMACH HURT AND I DIDN'T SIT WITH HER. THEN MY PARENTS PICKED ME UP FROM THE AIRPORT. I SAID GOODBYE TO HER. THEN AT HOME MY PARENTS YELLED AT ME AND TOLD ME IM A DISGRACE FOR PAINTING MY NAILS AND THAT I DON'T DESERVE ANYTHING BUT THE BARE MINIMUM AND THAT THEY ARE ASHAMED OF ME AND THAT IT INFURIATES THEM THAT I CAN'T JUST BE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE. I STAYED DATING THAT GIRL. WE HUNG OUT A COUPLE TIMES. SHE EVENTUALLY BECAME VERY MANIPULATIVE AND EMOTIONALLY ABUSIVE. I LEFT HER. THEN I WAS SINGLE FOR A BIT. THEN OF COURSE I STARTED DATING SOMEONE ELSE. MY CURRENT GIRLFRIEND. I LOVE HER! SHE ISN'T ABUSIVE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE! SHE'S GREAT. SHE IS PERFECT SO FAR. BUT SHE HAS HER OWN TROUBLES AND I FEEL BAD CAUSE I CAN'T HELP HER. REWIND TO A FEW WEEKS AFTER I GOT BACK FROM THE EUROPE TRIP. JUNIOR YEAR STARTED. I WAS FAIRLY CONFIDENT. THEN EVERYTHING WENT DOWNHILL. REALLY FAST. I STARTED FAILING. I BECAME MORE AND MORE DEPRESSED. I HATED MYSELF AND EVERYONE AROUND ME. I TOLD MY PARENTS I'M DEPRESSED. THEY DIDN'T CARE. I TOLD THEM AGAIN. THEY DIDN'T CARE. I TOLD THEM ONE MORE TIME. THE DIDN'T CARE AT ENOUGH. I STARTED SMOKING WEED. A LOT OF IT. CONSTANTLY. I LOVED IT. WEED IS GREAT, BUT IT BECAME A DEPENDENCY. THEN ONE DAY I HAD A BREAKDOWN AT SCHOOL AND I WENT TO MY TEACHER BECAUSE I WOULD'VE KILLED MYSELF IF I DIDN'T. SHE TOLD ME SOME KIND WORDS THEN CALLED MY MOM. MY MOM CAME. WE WENT TO AN OFFICE AND DISCUSSED SOME STUFF ABOUT SCHOOL AND DEPRESSION WITH THIS ONE GUY AND THIS ONE REALLY NICE BUT ANNOYING WHITE LADY. MY DAD CAME. I FELT BETTER. I WENT HOME. THEN MY PARENTS YELLED AT ME AND WE GOT IN A HUGE UGLY ARGUMENT. THEY GOT MAD AT ME FOR SEEKING HELP.

"THEY DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU AT SCHOOL! THAT'S WHAT WE'RE HERE FOR."

"BUT DAD, IT'S NOT EASY TELLING YOUR PARENTS THAT YOU WANNA KILL YOURSELF."

"YOU EMBARASSED US, YOU HURT OUR FEELINGS."

"DAD I WANNA DIE PLEASE I NEED HELP."

"FUCK YOU! YOU'RE SELFISH AND YOU DON'T LOVE US!"

THE WHITE LADY TOLD MY PARENTS THAT I NEED A PAPER FROM A PSYCHOLOGIST SAYING THAT I WON'T HURT MYSELF OR OTHERS TO BE ABLE TO ATTEND SCHOOL AGAIN. THEN THE NEXT DAY MY PARENTS DID A RANDOM DRUG TEST ON ME. THEN THAT NIGHT THEY CONFRONTED ME ABOUT IT BECAUSE THEY SAW THAT I HAD BEEN CONSUMING WEED. THEY ARE OLD AND UNEDUCATED ON IT SO THEY THINK IT'S LIKE METH. THAT MADE THE WHOLE THING VERY DIFFICULT. THEN I BROKE DOWN AGAIN. I STARTED TELLING THEM HOW BAD I WANTED TO DIE. THEN MY DAD HELD ME AND TOLD ME HE LOVED ME. A VOICE IN MY HEAD TOLD ME NOT TO BELIEVE HIM. I COMPLIED. THE NEXT DAY MY SISTERS CAME TO THE HOUSE. THEY ALL TALKED TO ME AND TOLD ME THAT I DIDN'T HAVE TO GO BACK TO SCHOOL IF I WASN'T READY. THEY KEPT DEMONIZING MEDICATION TO SCARE ME BECAUSE THEY REFUSE TO GIVE ME THE MEDICATION I SO DESPERATELY HAVE BEEN NEEDING FOR THE PAST FOUR YEARS. THEY KEPT ME PRISONER AT HOME. THEY FORCED ME TO JOIN A BOXING CLUB. THEY TOOK AWAY MY PRIVILEDGES. THEN THE SCHOOL CALLED AND SAID I HAD TO GO BACK. I GOT A NOTE. THEY DECLINED IT. I GOT ANOTHER NOTE. THEY DECLINED THAT ONE TOO. THEN I GOT ANOTHER ONE AND I'M BACK IN SCHOOL. I HATE IT. I'M SWITCHING SCHOOLS NEXT SEMESTER. BUT I NEED TO TRY AND RAISE MY GRADES FOR NOW. I AM NOT CURRENTLY SUICIDAL. BUT I AM SAD. VERY SAD. STILL DEPRESSED (OBVIOUSLY).

[nora-hindi-blog]

Previously on Nora's struggle with procrastination:

Okay. Self evaluation. Lets do this. The good: Im taking the account handler role in the agency seriously and im trying to come up with ideas and ways to make us have a better online presence. I really am not sure about why Im so into social media, maybe because it has to do with people and knowing what they like and what they dont. As well as the fact im a very active person on social media, always keeping up with whats happening. So its a nice fit. Im really looking forward to working on Grad show and making the social media aspect part of it. Itll hopefully keep my hands full and not allow me to procrastinate. I got to collab again! And film! And direct. Its the best combination for me because im in control of the situation and can just solve the issues hands on and have someone there to bounce off ideas. It makes the process just more enjoyable and a lot more creative. Filming went well, definitely improved from last year. And i managed to experiment a little bit with after effects. There were no tears in the process so that was a step in the right direction. Even though for the Shubbak brief I couldn't get out of it as much as I hoped i would. It gave me a chance to finally attempt experimenting with Arabic typography; something i have never done before. I want to try to incorporate more stuff like that. Bilingual things. I know both languages i should be able to design confidently with both, after all i will go back home and Arabic is definitely in demand. So it was useful to sort of get started on that, and the research i did and the stuff i looked at really helped. We grow cherries: its off to a good start. The design we have so far is going in the right direction i just need to look it over again with fresh eyes. Then hopefully with the help of Fran developing it further. And now ... the bad. I am disappointed by my lack of motivation and my terrible procrastination. The problem is, that i wouldnt ignore the fact that I had work to do it was simply just that i was not motivated to do so. I enjoy tight deadlines, it makes me think faster and clearer. As it doesnt allow me the "luxury" to get lost in my thoughts. Because once I start overthinking an idea, its dead. Which was the biggest issue i had this module. Especially with the stress of dissertation. I hate making excuses. But there was no motivation and i think for FMP i need to try to work out a away that would make for better outcomes and just a way for me to enjoy it more so that i could be more productive. My briefs as I previously mentioned kept changing so one obvious thing there would be to decide on an idea and just go with it and then worry about the rest as it comes. Im happy with the outcomes design wise. Shubbak; it was a simple approach but theres nothing extravagant about it. From a social media perspective i think it works well with their aim and its a easy-light feel which is what i wanted to achieve. Along with the idea for campaign arab 101. My only issue is that i didnt get to explore it further. (Yes, that is my fault.) Blacshade: The videos came together nicely eventually i believe. Im very confident now with using premier. And it was good to learn how to grade it and fix the colors. So thats a technical skill for me right there. However there was a struggle in understanding the concept of what we were aiming to do it kept changing from hair, to relating it to TV series, to then moving on to sunglasses. It was a very good opportunity that the sunglasses came up, because i ended up tailoring the situation to meet my brief, while still being equally beneficial to Cherine's personal project. Because we kept changing ideas and moving back and forth we had to let go of some of the beautifully shot footage simply because it was irrelevant. Now that were more serious about the agency's online presence im taking this as an opportunity to just be able to design more freely, having more creative freedom when it comes to little posts. Simple ideas; theyll make for good practice. All in all. Procrastination you are the enemy. Im making my way back for fmp! I better.