#incorrect wicked quotes

[starspangledpumpkin]

Fiyero: Elphaba's just wonderful. I don't see why people hate her so much.

Boq: She's literally at the top of Oz's Most Wanted list. She blew up a building just yesterday.

Fiyero: Oz forbid women do anything.

[lillifaba]

Elphaba: It's been brought to my attention that I offended some of you. I'm truly sorry, I meant to offend all of you.

[victoriously-wicked]

Elphaba: *sighs* Glinda: You bored? Elphaba: Yeah. Glinda: Wanna start drama for no reason? Elphaba (getting up from her seat): I thought you’d never ask.

[dracslover]

Glinda: You often use humor to deflect trauma

Elphaba: Thank you

Glinda: I didn't say that was a good thing

Elphaba: What I'm hearing is, you think I'm funny

[incorrectmusicals]

*on the way to school one morning*

Nessa: Crap! I forgot my makeup for dress rehearsal!

Frexpar: When I was in plays in high school and that happened, I'd usually just ask my sister if I could borrow some of hers, but I don't think yours has any.

Elphaba: *starts digging in her bag* Hold on...

Frexpar: It's okay if you don't.

Elphaba: Let me commit to the bit!

Frexpar: Do you have something weird in there?

Elphaba: *pulls out bright green foundation* Is this what you need?

[zvtiii]

*In the Wizard's Palace*

Glinda: What time is it?

Fiyero: I dont know pass me that saxaphone and we'll find out

Fiyero: *BLASTS the saxaphone*

Elphaba in her self-imposed exile: WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXAPHONE AT THE TWO IN THE FUCKING MORNING

Fiyero: It's 2 am

[naughtnixnothing]

Jude: i hate you

Cardan: *in his head* enemies to lovers, slow burn, angst with happy ending, 300k+ words

[lostalittle]

Cardan, stroking Jude's hair : You're so cute and pretty.

Jude, sleepily : I could beat the shit out of you.

Cardan, lovingly : I know.

[cromulentreader]

Cardan: Marry me, *wait, she needs a good reason to do this* become the Queen of Elfhame.

Jude: *wtf* What?

Cardan: It's cool, think of it as a political arrangement.

Jude: ...

Cardan: *Holly shit, she might make me beg for her hand* just until you want me to abdicate. It's cool.

Jude: so I free you from the servitude vow and you marry me never?

Cardan: no, I'll marry you right now *lest you convince yourself I'm plotting something and cut my throat*

Jude: Fine, it's cool. How do we get this over with?

Cardan: Cool, cool. We just exchange vows. Unless you imagined something more romantic...

Jude: no, it's cool.

Cardan: *ffs, I already started redecorating the room with flowers* cool, cool

[praisethelorde]

Taryn: Put yourself in my shoes.

Cardan: I would never wear those.

[wheresmypineapplebro]

Jude: who else here thought Cardan was my boyfriend?

Jude: Cardan put your hand down

[lillifaba]

Elphaba: My baby is sick and my husband is dying... Oh Nanny, what shall I do?

Nanny: Well you have a black dress.

[victoriously-wicked]

THE OZIANS : You’re our only hope!

GLINDA: Then you’re all screwed.

[dracslover]

Galinda: Okay, truth or dare?

Elphaba: Truth

Galinda: How many hours have you slept this week?

Elphaba:

Elphaba: ...Dare

Galinda: Go to bed.

Elphaba: I don’t like this game.

[incorrectmusicals]

Elphaba: We are an unusual couple, you know.

Fiyero: I don’t think that was ever in question.

[zvtiii]

Elphaba: Normal fathers give their children dolls, and my father gave me self-hatred.