#it fuels his autistic desire to have complete control over something in his life

[kusuokisser]

saiki is a total collector. he loves to collect shit. he has an island he teleports to sometimes that is full of merchandise and different things and theyre all catagorized.

he especially likes collecting fossils. something about the mortality of it all is strangely fascinating and comforting to him. he hopes that one day someone appreciates his species fossils as he appreciates others.

rambled in tags just a bit but i think its a fine addition

[thunderlummox]

Gaming Efficiency and the Child

I think I’ve figured out what is fueling my recent gaming habits.

When I was a kid/teenager/college student I had mountains of time on my hands. When I wasn’t working or studying I pretty much had that time to myself, meaning I had sometimes 4-8 hours of game time I could play daily, sometimes even more on my days off during some periods of college (it was not unusual to put in about 10-16 hours on days off with no school work to handle).

I am now of course 37 with a wife and kid, a 50 hour a week job (with commuting time) and various responsibilities adjacent but not necessarily related to those primary responsibilities. As such sometimes, especially in tax season (accountant), I have maybe an hour, maybe two, tops during the work week to play a game, and that’s if I’m not dead exhausted where I just want to hit the couch and watch Parks and Rec (again). 

I think this is, without a doubt, the main reason my gaming habits and desires have changed dramatically. I used to be able to go through a 60+ hour game in a fairly short amount of time, even in between work and school, because I could spend several hours at a time deep diving and not worrying about outside concerns. This is no longer the case. Even on weekends there are responsibilities that take me out of the running for some of these games.

The child is the major reason for this. I had demands on my time before, but his demand is on my mind and soul. Even if I’m able to get a long stretch of time to play games I can’t really get into an immersive experience anymore because I need to have at least some of my attention on the kid and what he’s doing. He needs to go outside and play, and as he’s autistic he hasn’t yet gotten a cadre of friends to gang up with and go out on his own. The tunnel vision necessary to succeed at some games or the immersion that keeps you interested isn’t something I can spare at this point in his life.

I also have to be cognizant of the material of the games I’m playing. Much as I’d love to dive into Horizon Zero Dawn or the Last of Us Remastered on my PS4 my play time on those would be limited to the hour or so a night after he goes to bed, which makes it very difficult to get into a rhythm or feeling about the game in those short intervals. The subject matter is absolutely not appropriate for a 7 year old autistic child, especially since he’s not yet progressed in his communication enough to tell us when he’s scared or where we can explain the difference between video game and cartoon violence and real-world violence to a degree we can be satisfied with.

The trend towards the vast open world with millions of things to do is counter to my gaming needs; I have a completionist mindset when it comes to gaming (I famously lost a summer in ‘02 playing Tony Hawk Pro Skater 2 to absolute completion, in the days before achievements and trophies) so ignoring all the side quests and collectibles scattered around the open-world genre is almost impossible for me if I want to enjoy a game like that. And forget about JRPGS; that genre has barely evolved since the mid-nineties and still in recent games rely on save points (which are the most disrespectful thing to an adult gamer’s time) for the recording of progress, something that necessitates a certain about of play time be set aside to get from one point to another. 

So what does a game need to get my attention? I’ve prepared a list:

1) Lack of graphic, realistic violence. I know there is a severe lack of proof that violent video games cause real-world violence (famously I point to the drop in crime statistics after the release of a GTA game, look it up) but in my head it’s not that it will turn my kid into a psycho it’s that he may not understand that violence isn’t a quality answer in most real-life situations. And I can’t gauge accurately how he’s absorbing that information as yet. Plus since becoming a father I’ve found my hunger for ultra-violence has dropped considerably if it isn’t attached to a quality underlying metaphor or message.

2) Efficiency. I need to be able to feel like I’ve made progress in a game in a short period of time, half hour to 2 hours at most. I can’t be shackled to a game without consistent auto save after everything you do, or a quick save function hot keyed to a button. Drop of a hat I need to be able to get out of that game and do other stuff.

3) Easy to learn, difficult to master. I’ve tried Dark Souls I can’t say how many times: I will never play these games well. The difficulty in merely learning the basic things you need to win makes it impossible for me to get into a rhythm on the game and get to the point where I can progress. Same with an open world game like the Witcher 3. I basically have to relearn the controls and menu and crafting system each time I pick it up, and even with the presence of auto save functions and the like I can’t seem to find the sweet spot. Plus it’s violent as all get out at times. Someday maybe, someday. I have to be able to pick up a game, learn the basics needed to play on the easiest level, and then see if it can hold my attention long enough to master.

These parameters have led me to basically be a 2-3 game player now. Diablo III and Overwatch are perfect games for my lifestyle; easy to learn the basics, difficult to become a master at, able to be played in short intervals and still feel progress, and lack of over the top violence makes them playable in or out of my son’s presence without me worrying too much about his fragile little mind getting warped. That and they are SUPER fun to play, per the usual Blizzard product. Add to that whatever I’m playing on my Vita (since it’s portable it allows me to play whenever I have a spare free moment in my day) comprise the full list of games I play regularly.

Aside from an occasional wistful remembrance of hours spent wandering the World of Warcraft or exploring the galaxy of Mass Effect I don’t really miss the experiences anymore. It’s a sacrifice I’ve willingly made, and I’m still stockpiling games and books for when I reach an age with more time on my hands, like when the kid is grown or I’m retired (semi retired; I picked accounting because as long as I’m still mentally sound I can do it until I die at some level). 

So while I read all the issues with Mass Effect Andromeda or about people having amazing experiences with Horizon Zero Dawn I don’t really feel the need or pull to get into those games anymore. I’m happy to experience the new arcades now; online games like Diablo and Overwatch that you pick up and play at leisure, but still have depth for people to explore and become amazing at. Because honestly, I’m going to eventually have more time to play the games I’m missing, and by then I’ll probably only need to play the most excellent of them. And they will be dirt cheap to purchase as well.

PS I know in Diablo you basically make demons explode in huge gouts of blood all the time, but I make the argument that the artsy nature of the rendering and lack of human characteristics makes it still a game that doesn’t do too much in the way of violent imagery. Besides if demons do come around I want my son to know it’s ok to kill them. 

#gaming 

[spynotebook]

Sherlock’s success was fueled by outsiders. The modern-day reimagining of Sherlock Holmes attracted a large and adoring online fandom, composed in part by three groups—women, LGBQT people, and autistic people. Women, in addition to making up the bulk of any fan community, adored Benedict Cumberbatch/ Battenberg Cucumber/Berryman Catamaran. Queer viewers picked up on the heavy romantic subtext between Sherlock and John Watson. And autistic people embraced Sherlock as a character who gave us a rare chance to see ourselves represented—exceptional at spotting details and identifying patterns, less good at reading emotions or navigating social situations. Sherlock was a show that seemed to prize intelligence over strength, honesty over likability, and non-traditional lifestyles and relationships over a heterosexual romance arc. In short, it was a show where those who felt different for whatever reason could find a home.

Sunday’s controversial season 4 finale, “The Final Problem,” set fans off on the wrong foot before it even began, with the previous week’s cliffhanger ending. Following hints that Sherlock and his brother Mycroft—who, like Sherlock, is superhumanly intelligent and apparently uninterested in personal relationships—had another sibling, their never-before-mentioned sister Eurus, who came out of hiding and shot Watson in the head.

That particular jaw-dropping moment was dispatched fairly quickly in the next episode. She used a tranquilliser and disappeared, allowing Mycroft to explain: Eurus, like her brothers, showed phenomenal intelligence from an early age, but her emotional detachment grew increasingly ominous until she apparently killed Sherlock’s dog Redbeard and burned the house down, causing Sherlock to repress all memories of her. She is now meant to be imprisoned in Sherrinford, an island mental hospital for the world’s most dangerous criminals.

Sherrinford is one of the series’ many fan references—it was Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s original name for Sherlock Holmes, and has been used by other writers for a third Holmes brother. Turning Sherlock’s missing sibling into a woman was presumably writers Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss’ way of giving women a more prominent role in the story, but why was Eurus, the only woman, the only sibling who used the family brilliance for evil instead of good?

Compare Eurus with Mary Watson, who was killed off (in the grand tradition of ‘fridging’ female characters to give their partners something to angst about) in another one of this season’s shocking moments. Unlike Eurus, Mary was presented as warm and domestic—despite her past as a mercenary, she desired nothing more than an ordinary life of marriage and motherhood with Watson. Mary is a heroine because she prioritises emotions and family life over getting involved in dangerous crime or extraordinary feats. Eurus is a villain because she does the opposite.

Following the airing of “The Final Problem,” some disappointed fans have been tweeting ‘#Norbury’ (a code word Holmes agreed with Mrs Hudson to stop him from going too far after his actions led to Mary’s death) in protest, with many outraged that the show has, once again, coded its villains (Eurus and Moriarty) as queer while treating the possibility of a relationship between Holmes and Watson as a joke.

But if “The Final Problem” displayed the worst of Sherlock’s tendency to appropriate queerness, it similarly continued a worrying trend of appropriating autism. The writers were unwilling to explicitly characterise Sherlock as autistic or queer, but he was given superficial autistic traits, which it was suggested led to his heightened intelligence. When those same traits are applied to his sister, however, they make her an emotionless monster who can’t tell the difference between her brother laughing and screaming and, when asked if cutting herself causes pain, replies, “Which one’s pain?”

Presenting Eurus as needing to be institutionalised for her own and others’ safety echoes the worst myths about autism. For most of the twentieth century, parents of autistic children, as well as those with learning difficulties, were encouraged to place their children in often brutal institutions. “The Final Problem” reinforces the dangerous stereotype that autistic people are alien and need to be locked away from society. Making autistic traits heroic in a man but sinister in a woman also makes autistic women seem particularly unnatural. In real life, the misperception of autism as a male condition has led to many autistic women (myself included) suffering long delays in receiving a diagnosis or support.

As if to add insult to injury, Eurus isn’t even an effective villain. After taking control of Sherrinford, she traps Holmes, Watson and Mycroft in a nightmare game show, forcing them to make a series of sadistic and murderous choices in order to rescue a child from an out-of-control aeroplane. But the muddled ending revealed that the child was somehow Eurus—trapped above everyone else, unable to connect—and all her actions were motivated by a need for her brother to be close to her, including murdering his best friend, who was replaced by a dog in Sherlock’s traumatised memory.

Eurus breaks down, Sherlock comforts her, she saves Watson (who is at this point trapped in a well) and is returned to Sherrinford, now completely speechless but able to communicate with Sherlock through violin playing. Disturbingly, the character Sherlock’s sister most resembled was his love interest, Irene Adler – another seemingly formidable adversary who relied on Moriarty to outwit Sherlock before being undone by her love for the great detective. The only other women in “The Final Problem” were victims—the prison governor’s wife was bound, gagged and quickly murdered, while Molly Hooper was brought back just to confirm that she’s still hopelessly hung up on Sherlock—leaving all its female characters ultimately defined by, and at the mercy of, men.

“The Final Problem” may well be Sherlock’s last hurrah—Moffat has indicated that he wants to do a fifth series, but doesn’t know when it will happen. If this is the end, then it leaves the people who loved the show for its celebration of difference with a troubling message: that difference makes you a hero if you’re a white man, and an aberration if you’re anyone else.

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