#it gets very VERY oily on the grill

[carlyraejepsans]

You are painfully wrong about grilled cheese

when i have a chance to visit tremosine and get a formaggella i do enjoy a slice of it on the grill, from time to time. i can't eat a lot of it without getting nauseous tho. so instead i eat it with jam :]

[yourgamemasterthewhiterabbit]

The restaurant at the end of the world turns out to be a waffle house,

Now you might be thinking “Well, the world hasn't ended, and weren't you just on about rabbit holes?”

For -you- the world hasn't ended, maybe you missed it, and I was on about rabbit holes and vagueing about various animals [affectionately], I was setting up for a joke [reference?] but no one took the bait

This is odd -being in a waffle house, not people ignoring my attempts at humour- because I'm in northern Canada [though in Canada you get a bonus 5% to dad jokes and silly puns it's free for everyone], and I didn't know the states had snow this time of year, but that's immaterial really

Because this isn't Canada or anywhere else anymore, it's the end of the world

I'm doing something I can never actually do again, I'm sitting in a restaurant face to face with another person, no mask between me and food, or them, at the end of the world the virus can't get you [or that's what everyone is convinced of]

I'm asking about all day breakfast and how many kinds of oily meat and eggs they have on one platter, with waffles, preferably. I don't have to think about 102 food allergies here, or whether someone has contaminated my food, whether this meal could rob me of health for months to come, or permanently, I can just stuff my face with fat and protein and talk to this guy about the life span of chipmunks and various mustelids, maybe beavers or rabbits... This started with Beavers didn't it?

And the thought crosses my mind that this is what everyone else does daily without even having to think about it, the definition of taking things for granted,

Just sitting in a fucking restaurant

They can walk into a diner, order a slice of pie and eat it while striking up conversation with the guy who walked in behind them

I don't think another living person has seen my face in over 5 years except when I pull down my mask to buy alcohol or get an id photo taken

I see other people's faces though and I wish I didn't as much

They don't have to question if they are trading this experience -here and now- for everything that could have come after it every time, they just get to live in the here and now, like in this waffle house

I can't remember the last time I ate out anywhere, which -probably- means it went badly,

I can't have possibly known it would be my last time just being able to order and eat food in public,

I couldn't have made sure to make it count, or have a hasty do-over to pick which meal would be the last one, not my -last- one, but the last one before the world eneded

Was it when my ex invited me to the only pizza place I could still eat at, just to pick a fight with me? [As if they knew it might mean I wouldn't be able to eat there again, I had to stop ordering too because they started being super skimpy on the toppings and my order is too recognizable] They called it “neutral ground” like they just learned a new philosophy term that week but didn't actually know what it meant.

Was it the plain fries I hastily shoved down immediately after dental surgery and explicitly against all instruction? [I was fine I did not bite myself or burn myself, the anaesthetic wasn't ever going to last that long, and I know my safe limits], I kind of hope it was that, it was too many years ago though, or that time I bought packaged food and ate it at the picnic table outside the store that no one uses. There were seagulls,

It probably should have been a chip truck on a beach. It wasn't, but it should have been,

It could have been better whatever it was. I could have gone out of my way to find a place that still served chocolate shakes like the ones I remember from that diner in my childhood. I could have gone alone. I could have gotten grilled cheese. I could have had sushi again. I could have spent it talking with strangers instead of people who would become strangers. I could have had one of those really good diner burgers that seems meant for about three people, or one very hungry one,

I know what fast food sausages and bacon taste like, I remember... I think,

What were we talking about? Falling down rabbit holes, research for curiosity's sake and imagination too I guess. There was snow at the end of one tunnel. Do you know how many animals in Canada hunt in the snow by sensing what's beneath them?

I remember the last time I ate eggs at a diner they got shells in mine, I hate that unexpected crunch, but I'd have shells hiding in all my restaurant eggs forever if it meant I could safely eat at a restaurant again,

If I could breathe,

If face to face contact with other people wasn't exactly like having to hold my breath,

If being physically close to another person was still something other than abstraction to me,

If sitting at a diner was something other than a vivid memory,

That little hop foxes do to break through the crust on snow... Wolves do it too. Maybe you noticed your dog doing it on your mattress. Minx also do that, and skunks I imagine. Wolverines and those funny little white foxes. I didn't get a chance to joke about trying to dig out of a rabbit hole in deep snow only to meet something bigger, because someone dragged me to this waffle house instead, where I can eat enough that the waitresses watch our table and giggle, and contemplate the end of normalcy,

I don't have to tell him, at the end of the world, that this is all just pretend, that for me it could never be real. I could never sit here, I could never talk this close -across a table- from anyone, I'd be allergic to almost every food they have on their menu and live in fear of someone touching my food with unclean hands, or spitting in it, because it could kill me, he doesn't have to know and I don't have to bring it up, not at the restaurant at the end of the world...

I don't have to wonder how well they wash these plates, or if there's someone else's lipstick still on my glass... Scratch that, coffee mug... I don't even have to wonder if a waffle house actually serves you on real plates or with real coffee mugs, and I'm not too sensitive to alkaloids to drink coffee anymore... not at the end of the world,

Carrots made me sick the other day. Upset my stomach so much I got afraid I couldn't keep taking my medications... Turns out it was just the alkaloids again. I'd make a shit rabbit actually, I can't even keep a carrot down and half of what I can still eat is meat,

It's probably terrifying to be in a safe little snow tunnel and have something break down from on top of you out of nowhere, I wonder if there's much warning about that either, there can't really be, maybe a tension knowing it could always come down on you, but it also makes me wonder if there are any animals that hunt from beneath, A cozy bright white sparkling tunnel of diffused sun and the quiet impact of careful paws overhead... There are lots of animals in Canada that take down prey multiple times their size, but I don't know if any use snow as a cover for hunting, or if they just make burrows in it to hide,

Forgive me, I've been on an ill-advised amount of antihistamines and anti-inflammatories for weeks now, and -this- tunnel started with a question about beavers and you don't want to know what they were doing, something about desperate measures to survive and the removal of pleasure... Don't look it up, we already did,

That's how I fell down a rabbit hole and ended up at a waffle house at the end of the world,

It was never real anyway, just grown-ups with imaginations.

[poryphoria]

bunch of neurodivergent/disability/whateverthefuck you wanna call these angled crackpot hcs bc fuck ya life (my crackles uses hymn/gore/rot/chirp thank uuuu ^_^)

touch adverse to strangers, flinches & winces whenever someone chirp doesn't know bumps or touches hymn. needs a lot of personal space, hyperventilates & struggles to breathe in crowds or in general uncomfortably close proximity to strangers

however gore is also BADLY touch starved in an intimate or friendly way. loves to cuddle, hold hands, hug & lean on ppl. craves body heat. would probably be healed if someone just laid on hymn like a sandwich for an hour or so

hates eye contact but loves to stare at people when they're not looking. not for malicious purposes hy just finds people fascinating

acne crazystyle bc rot can never stop touching & picking rots face & body 🔥🔥🔥🔥 hys got it all over hys shoulders and back too, sometimes on hys thighs. dry skin aswell bc hy hates the sensation of lotion/whatever oily shit ur supposed to put on ur skin to make it Not do that. patchy like a lizard 🔥🔥🔥🔥

severe stomach issues & food sensitivity 🔥🔥🔥🔥 gets horrible stomach cramps from stress & anxiety. Stressed and anxious often. god bless. gore's also lactose intolerant 🔥🔥🔥🔥

has trouble expressing gratitude- feels a lot of emotions very strongly but hy's rarely able to actually express or articulate them. on the equal opposite end rot tends to break down into tears whenever rot tries to express frustration & anger, frustratingly enough

CHRONIC PAIN NUMERO UNOOOOO 🔥🔥🔥🔥 Walking Hurts! Standing Hurts! Why does it hurt? Only god knows! would probably benefit from a cane. frequent back pain as well occasional mystery hand pain. also gets period cramps REALLY FUCKING BADLY to the point that they usually leave hymn bedridden for a day

anxious stutter & hy tends to mix up & get stuck on words, especially when hys brain is moving faster than hy can talk.

mimics voices & speech patterns, especially those of the people hy likes/is close with. does silly voices to hymnself. often Gets Stuck doing said voices. Condemned to the bit

in a similar vein, has been told that gore is inexpressive/"too flat" so frequently that gore now overcompensates heavily by exaggerating hys voice & gestures in order to get hymnself across

has mild dyslexia, mixes up directions frequently, Very Bad at navigating

chronically bad memory issues that were exacerbated by the dissonance poisoning. Sticky note.... Save me sticky note with appointment written on it.... Save me clipboard full of important information I will not remember otherwise.....

sensory ordeals chirp despises: dust/powder on hands, being in close proximity to live bands, the taste of smoke in food/grilled meats, any smell that is very chemical-y in nature (formaldehyde and latex are sort of exceptions but they're on thin ice.)

has a very difficult time discerning between platonic & romantic affection, and honestly doesn't rly gaf about the difference either at this point. love is love and rot has so much of it in rots heart

source: all of these came to me in prophetic visions. i probably have more but i cant remember them rn You're welcome thank youuu

[jellyfilledd]

Text time. Senerio I've been fantasizing about for way too long now. Thought it'd be nice to type out on here.

Going to ~~Or being forced into..~~ a Heart Attack Grill-type place. Except way more heavy into the "We exist only to make you fatter.* philosophy.

And everything on the menu is the same but like. Even *less* health regulations than the real thing. Not a single thing that isn't slathered in grease of butter.

Ordering something called the Heart Throb, or Artery Clogger, or whatever.

A five pound mess of meat and cheese stuffed into two toasted buns with way too much butter, and it all just ends up an oily, butter soaked, cheesy, fatty, dripping, disgusting mess that and too-far-gone fatass would dig their hands into anyway. No matter if they just ate or not. Getting it everywhere, all over themselves, the floor, the table. A feeder or significant other egging them on, praising them despite the complete fucking mess they are.

They might even order another one if they finish fast enough. Maybe an equally unhealthy milkshake in a cup that edges the line between an actual cup and a bucket for pigs to eat slop out of.

And it's not just them in there. The place is full of failures who can barely walk or fit in a booth. Who need multiple chairs under their giant sweaty asses to even sit properly. Huffing and groaning while they eat more and more.

Everything on the menu is as cheap as possible so they're encouraged to get more, to stretch their guts as far as possible. Nothing that gets cooked there isn't at least drenched in butter or sugar. So you either finish when you're done, or when someone decides when you're done for you...

If you break a chair, you get a free meal, pop a button or rip your pants, you get half off your check. If you weigh more than five pounds extra then when you came in, you get another voucher for a free meal.

Stretch goals that only exist to get you to consume more... To stretch that gut to its very limit.

Leaving five pounds heavier and a grease-covered mess. Barely able to waddle out the door without help. And of course practically being forced by the workers into taking something to go.

The. Fucking.. Dream,,,

[androphagos]

Memories from holidays in Spain

I have remembered some unforgettable experiences I’d like to share with you! Some years ago, when holidaying in Spain for the summer, we stumbled upon some very interesting places. We stayed for a few days at a small sea-side town, where people usually go to enjoy the beaches, the sun and the nightlife. It was a famous destination for young people that wanted to enjoy affordable holidays with excellent facilities. While the town seemed quiet and relaxed during the day, at night it was exactly the opposite. By the time the sun went down, it would become over-crowded with young tourists, that would party all night, getting drunk and high. My girlfriend and I would go out partying two-three times, but for the rest of our stay we preferred spending our nights at exquisite restaurants, where we could enjoy eating our favourite meat. In the town there were three very famous restaurants that served male meat exclusively. The men served were of excellent quality, thus the prices were extraordinarily high.

We had a pair of feet for a ridiculously high amount of money, but in the end it was worth it. The feet were harvested from a 22-year-old Spanish guy that was being prepared for this for many years. 

His dream was to become a professional football player, and he had a contract with a team when he was still a teenager. When signing a contract with a sports team, you basically consent to being owned by the team. If you succeed as a player, you continue your career and it becomes your profession. But if your performance is inadequate, your team will receive compensation for the effort they put into training you, by selling you to a man farm. So you either make it or you end up becoming meat. This specific man did not manage to impress with his performance. By the time he turned 18, he was transferred to one of the best man farms in Spain. His coach saw his potential as meat when he saw him in the changing rooms. Apart from realising how meaty his body was, he had also seen how smooth and meaty his feet were. He recommended extra care for the guy’s feet during his stay at the farm. And he was right about it, as he was finally chosen by one of the best restaurants in the country, mainly because of his feet.

The feet were harvested and cooked in front of us. Every table had its own guillotine, grill and stew pots. Our chef brought the boy to us and placed him on the other end of the table. His feet were still in shoes. It’s a tactic of the restaurant to marinate the men’s feet in espadrilles, which gives it a unique Spanish touch. They are certain that this type of shoe is excellent for transferring flavours and spices to the foot flesh. The feet are marinated for about a week in the espadrilles, and after that they are ready to be cooked. The restaurant also sells espadrilles to any customers that would like to use this marinating process for a boy at home.

Our chef took the espadrilles off the boy, and revealed the delicious moist feet that had retained a yellowish colour from the saffron and the other spices. The smell was divine even though the show had not even started yet. The main trick for this result was to keep the shoes on him for a whole week, allowing the foot meat to sweat and absorb all of the flavour of all the herbs and spices. The feet are not supposed to be touched or washed after the shoes are worn. The chef was careful not to touch the feet at all once they were exposed. The boy was tied up and gagged, and in his eyes you could see his intense sadness. It must be quite hard to accept that the most important body parts you needed for your dream career, have instead become the reason you’ll be eaten. 

His smooth feet looked oily and fresh as he wiggled his toes. When the chef grabbed his legs, he knew this was the end. His ankles were placed on the guillotine, and his legs were secured on the table. His back was placed on the vertical wooden surface, and his torso and arms were secured on that too. Behind his head there was a sharp blade which seemed ready to slice his neck off. As the chef moved his hand towards the handle of the blade above his ankles, the boy closed his eyes and his whole body became tense. It was as terrifying for him as it was entertaining for us and the chef. The chef asked us to push the button in front of us when we ‘d like to end the boy’s suffering. He counted to three and he pulled down the leaver. The two feet were chopped by the blade and they fell on the hot grill below them. We could immediately hear the soles sizzling on the grill, and the smell of foot meat and spices filled the room. The boy screamed through his gag, and he kicked his bleeding legs. The guillotine was moved higher on his legs, with the blade now placed on top of his knees. The chef counted to three, and chopped his calves off. The screams through the gag became even louder, and his eyes were ready to pop out. We decided to finally put him out of his misery, and we pushed the button. The boy was beheaded automatically by the blade, and then the chef removed the gag and placed the head inside the stew pot in front of us. He chopped some vegetables, and added them in the pot. By the end of the cooking session, the boy’s calves were carved into tasty grilled steaks, and his foot skin became crispy and brown on all sides. The aroma of the feet was more intense than ever. The boy’s head was also delicious, with the meat falling off the skull. The rest of his body was taken back to the kitchen, where it would be turned into other dishes.

It was one of the best grilled pairs of feet we’ve ever had. Needless to say, we bought some pairs of espadrilles to use on other men’s feet. But even though this experience was so unique, it was quite similar to other experiences we’ve had in expensive restaurants in Spain and elsewhere.  

What really surprised us was an unexpected eatery we stumbled upon, when we were looking for lunch options on a Sunday. We had enjoyed a morning at the beach, and we were looking for simple food options, like seafood, paella, pork or chicken dishes. While strolling around the town, we realised there was a smell that felt quite familiar. It smelled just like roasted man meat. The kind of smell you get when there is a spit-roast party going on. But it was 10 times more intense, which meant loads of guys were being roasted. We thought there might have been a spit-roast party going on at the beach, but we were at the beach the whole morning and there was nothing like that.

We let our nostrils guide the way, and we ended up in an area of the town which seemed quitter and less touristy. We finally found where the smell was coming from. It was a rotisserie… Yes, like the ones that sell rotisserie chicken. But we could see no chickens being roasted. The whole restaurant window was filled with spit roasted men on display. There were at least 5 rows of men on spits, with 10 men on each row. And there were additional rotisserie ovens with smaller body parts being roasted, such as heads, feet, hands, ribs and calves. We had never seen such a place before. There were more than 50 men being simultaneously roasted, some of them bronzer than others, while some were just recently placed on the spit.

It wasn’t just shocking to see so many guys being cooked at the same time, but also the fact that the restaurant inside was crowded, and the queues in the street were huge. At least 100 people were seated inside the diner, enjoying the freshly roasted man meat. Another 20 people or so were waiting at the door. And the weirdest thing of all was how long the take away queue was. It was at least 100 metres long, and people were just ordering pieces of roasted men to take home. There were also a couple of delivery men collecting orders.

The majority of the customers appeared to be locals, or at least Spanish. Only a few tourists were around, and we were two of them. We were intrigued, but also curious about the place. We definitely had to try it. I approached the entrance to check the prices, and I couldn’t believe my eyes. I had never seen male meat being so affordable. It was almost at the same price as pork or chicken. A pair of roasted feet with potatoes only costed 20 to 25 euros, a calve was around 15 euros, a head 20 euros and a whole man would only cost around 100 to 150 euros. At first we thought there was something dodgy going on. We thought that maybe it was an illegal establishment, or that the roasted guys were of really bad quality. But it didn’t seem like it, as all of them looked excellent, and the restaurant looked legit. We tried asking some people for more information, but not many could speak English. Finally, we decided to join the queue and next to us we found a local that was fluent in English and was happy to answer some of our questions as we were waiting.

He was a man in his 40s, who lived in a nearby town with his family. He told us that it is kind of a tradition to eat rotisserie meat with potatoes on Sundays. He was a frequent customer at this particular rotisserie, and his family loved the meat from there. This time he came to eat in by himself, as his wife and children headed to the big city for the day. We asked if he knew how come there are so many men being roasted, and why the prices were so low. He informed us that the rotisserie only operates on Sundays, and there are at least 100 men that are served every week. The majority of the men were in reality young tourists that got in trouble. During the summer months, the restaurant is overloaded with meat because of the thousands of tourists that visit. Many of them were British, but also a lot of them are German, Russian, French, Dutch, Italian and of course Spanish. He said that the locals demand to be respected by the tourists, and if the tourists don’t comply with the rules, they end up arrested and possibly eaten. For example, after partying all night, a lot of guys do drugs or go off the rails. They break things, vandalise monuments, pee in the streets, shout, harass people and many other offenses. After a specific time of the night, if a young man breaks the rules he will most probably be arrested and taken to the police station. Their parents or loved ones will be informed that they have been arrested, and that by the morning they’ll be considered as meat animals. Once they get arrested for specific offenses in this town, there is not much they can do about it. No lawyer or government can save them. They are transferred to the local farm, which is only 20 minutes away. There they are prepared and examined by professionals, and when you are deemed ready, they are sold to restaurateurs of the neighbouring towns. That’s how this rotisserie receives the majority of its meat. There are also other man farms around the region that follow similar procedures, and the rotisserie owners make sure to buy a variety of men every week. The prices are very low because these men are usually prepared to be eaten in less than a week. Of course they undergo health and sanitary checks and they are perfectly suitable for consumption. Another reason for the low prices is the efficiency of having one single cooking method for all the meat. No need for exquisite recipes, ingredients and pioneering ideas. Traditional spit-roasting techniques guarantee excellent meat quality, and delicious flavour.

While waiting to be seated, we could see the display area with all the men rotating. We could even recognise some of those guys. Two of them were a British couple that was staying at our hotel. We had seen them around the swimming pool area. 

It was quite impressive that we could still recognise them while they were impaled and roasted to a crisp. We were considering ordering their feet, but another customer had already ordered them for take away. We saw the waiters pausing the rotation, and chopping all four feet, placing them in take away boxes. How come we had never seen anything like this before? Feet like those would have costed a fortune at any other restaurant. But the person that ordered them only paid 40 euros.

As we were approaching the time we would be seated, we saw another boy we recognised. It was a German guy that was sitting behind us with his girlfriend at the beach some days beforehand. We had even commented on his feet being ridiculously meaty, when we saw him sunbathing. 

His girlfriend was in front of us in the queue, holding hands with another guy who looked Spanish. The German guy was naked and tied up, and the waiters dragged him to the spit-roasting machine where he would be impaled. The girlfriend waved at the boy from outside, and she sent him kisses, as the spit entered his ass. She laughed and joked about it with her new boyfriend and then by the time the German boy was rotating in the oven, she stopped giving him any attention. She said to her new boyfriend that she’d love to have the head and genitals of her ex, and he decided to have a calf and a pec.

This was what we needed to hear. His meaty feet were all ours. After waiting for another 20 minutes, the number of men on the spits reduced significantly. There were only about 15 men left, but the queue behind us was still huge. Inside the restaurant, most cages were empty, apart from 4-5 cages in which a dozen men were still waiting for their fate. The German guy was relatively golden now, and his feet looked perfectly glazed. It was unlikely that anyone would get to them before us. And to our own surprise, the head of one of the British guys we had recognised, was still rotating next to the remains of his boyfriend.

We finally sat down after an hour of waiting. First thing we did was to order the feet of the German guy, with potatoes as a side. We also ordered some of his ribs, and also the head of the British guy, which looked very appetising. We paid 60 euros in total, and had a meal like no other. The quantity was unparalleled to anything else we ate, and the quality was impressively good. The meat of the German boy was very tender and juicy, he was probably around his mid 20s. The foot meat was comparable to the one you would have at a Michelin restaurant. He had excellent arches, and his toes were big and meaty. I especially liked the crunchiness of his heel, and the crispy skin of his tops. His ribs had so much meat on them, and also the perfect amount of fat. The head of the British guy was cut in half by the cooks, as we wanted to share it. His cheek meat was very tender, and the whole skin was roasted to perfection. Much better than having a roast chicken. We were very lucky to have found that place. We visited again the last Sunday we were there, and we were not disappointed. That time we ordered more feet from various guys, and all of them were superb. There’s nothing like sunburnt tourist meat being spit-roasted on a Sunday.

[jackalopescruff]

Hey your awesome at cooking and your recipes always slap. Got any tips for a broke bitch with a shit kitchen making Grilled Cheese?

easiest thing is to make it more protein dense add some ham or bacon or turkey or whatever for some extra density. Using mayo on the bread like you would butter gives you a really good crust on the bread as well as some nice tang that goes well against the cheese. START IN A COLD PAN this is a huge one bc by pressing your bread into the pan putting the lid on and letting it all come up to temp you get a more even toasting as well as the cheese melts better and more evenly. avoid hard or aged cheeses as they dont melt well and they get very oily when they do. garlic salt is a good way to add a little flavor and you can sprinkle it on the mayo thats on the outside and itll toast nicely. dont be afraid to add a small bit of butter to the inside of your bread and also to season the inside with some pepper. all in all take it slow, its not a race, medium-medium low heat is the way to go its better to take a while on the sammy then it is to have a burnt one

[sebastianjameswrites]

Nuri spiced sardines in olive oil

“Seriously, are you still watching that?!”, my partner, Haley, asks. “It's been 3 hours and you're still watching canned sardine reviews?!”

“Tin reviews”, I replied,

Pre-Covid, tinned sardines were definitely not an exciting lunch idea to me. In 2018, I thoroughly enjoyed plump, charcoal grilled sardines on the southern coast of Spain, but frankly, chomping down on a dozen shiny, little, cold, oily fish was never an appetising idea. We had plenty of fresh seafood growing up in New Zealand that, I guess tinned fish wasn't something we ate much of at all. We had tinned tuna, but that really is about it. I didn't have my first tuna melt until Haley made me one on one of our early dates. A simple combination which I was weary about at first, quickly became a staple. 

Nowadays, as I spend plenty of time online, and some time outside in the real world, it's becoming clearer that more people are grasping the great idea of cheap and easy omega-3 fatty acids -- sardines! There are “Tin of the month” clubs, YouTube channels, TikTok accounts and Discord groups which all revolve directly around the ever growing tinned fish cult (or is it a fad? , maybe a chat for another day). Today, sardines and other tins of preserved seafood are something I keep an eye out for in every little market I walk by. I went to a few Asian supermarkets last week and found plenty of options. Sometimes hidden gems, entire walls of tinned seafood ( 1kg tins of fried dace??, maybe next time, thanks )). 

After an unsuccessful hunt for this particular brand around my current home of Vancouver BC, I turned to Dan at Rainbow Tomato Garden. The largest selection of tinned seafood IN THE WORLD should have what I need. A few days of adding tins, removing tins, reading reviews and calculating funds, I eagerly placed an order for a box of mixed tins, including a little stack of NURI brand. This Portugal based company is known to produce excellent tinned sardines, and have a history of tinning a superior product. Their website quotes them to be “the only company that remains faithful to the traditional method throughout its production.” Since 1920 they have been pumping out tins using their homemade secret recipes. A short wait after shipping, a USPS box of goodness was on my doorstep.

After seeing so much talk and hype online about the Nuri Spiced Sardines in Olive Oil i decided to give one a rip for myself. 

The brand has simple and recognizable packaging, paper wrapper over a tin. Something about it being my first tin of Nuri made me want to keep the wrapper, such a simple but fond memory. Right at the crack of the tin, I knew these were going to be great. The “someone just opened a tin of dines” smell was there, but extremely subtle. It almost smelt like very light pickle brine. Definitely not an unpleasant smell, which sardines often get such a bad reputation for. Peeling back the lid revealed 3 chunky boys, shimmering in the olive oil. The fish were packed tightly enough to be touching, but were firm to the touch. Firm enough for me to easily grab the middle one out with chopsticks, with little damage. The skin on all the fish was already very damaged, with large parts missing. What little skin there was, was falling off the flesh once removed from the oil. Less or broken skin is not something I'm complaining about. Less skin means less scales! No one likes eating scales.

Half a fish for the first bite; these are damn delicious. A savoury, slightly salty taste and the firm bite to go with. A complete surprise to how subtle the flavour is. Really a delight and far less “fishy” than most people would expect. The cartilage in the spine had completely dissolved into the fish and had become soft, not bringing any noticeable crunch. The trio of sardines came packed with one slice of carrot, one slice of pickle, one little red chilli, part of a dried bay leaf and a clove. A classic combination to bring subtle heat and flavour to the oil and meat. You can see the workers at the Nuri factory hand packing the ingredients in this Youtube Video. Onto the operating table for the second oily boi; I removed the spine and ate that separately (my favourite part). Once the fish was on a plate I could really notice the colours in the meat, varying from white to a dark purple pink. The deeper the colour, the stronger the flavour. The oil kept a nice shine on everything and had a very light olive flavour. It had a light yellow colour that was still clear and glossy even after all this time marinating the fish. I personally love an olive oil tin over a soya oil tin. The carrot and pickle went down next, neither of which tasted like pickle or carrot. The flavour of both must get leached into the oil by the time it gets out to us consumers. The lucky last sardine went down on simple salted saltines with a bit more hot sauce. Adding the crackers to the table obviously makes for more texture, but it also creates more of a vessel for the extra hot sauce I was drizzling on top. I haven't been able to find a bottle of the famous Salsa Espinaler locally yet, which I have read is perfect on all fish, but I have a few more artisanal stores to check out before I resort to buying online. The heat was subtle, to put it subtly. One little chilli adds little to no mouth buzz sensation. The Nuri Extra spiced uses 3 chillies per tin, so I will have to test that tin to see if they have some real spice and mouth feel. 

Two saltines and three fish. Not a meal I used to go out of my way to have, but today was a healthy and highly enjoyable lunch. These sardines could easily be broken up and put on top of a salad, used as a “sardine melt” or lightly floured and then fried in their own oil. My next tin of Nuri spiced, i'm going to use this beer batter recipe: Beer Battered ‘Dines. 

When a store in my hometown starts to stock Nuri brand, I will be first in line ready to pick up a stack of tins. I would love to have the spiced sardines in olive oil as my “go to tin”, I mean, who wouldn't?  I recommend these to any non-sardine eater, someone who is looking to try their first tin, or to impress someone on a first date! The subtleness would be an ideal way to ease someone into the flavour rather than starting them off with Oskars Surstromming. Do yourself a favour, find a local supplier of Nuri, pick up a tin and give it a crack!

Tin Rating - 4/5

[professorlizzard]

Week #25

169. Melanch's Oily: A shop selling sardines, tinned in flavourful oils. The proprietor stars at the sun of Hexaspace, beak idly whistling. The shoppers come back often, as they conspider him a friend who will always listen, as long as they buy at least one tin of fish.

170. Feature Ft : A personal injury lawyer. You can never underestimate the amount of exciting ways you can get accidentaly injured due to negligence, even in the center of ardent bureaucracy. Of course, Dr Ft will mostly handle pro bono cases, as he gets most of his income from his space internet law videos.

171. Gene Tonics: A bitter soda vending place. People come to reminisce about the bitter truth of life. Sometimes they put actual gin in the soda, when they are consoling ones with particularly sad memories.

172. Lacertan Street General Practioner: A very friendly looking family GP's office. The various Random Lizard Doctors await locals with issues with open arms and open hearts. Them being able to (even if partially) shapeshift gives them closer understanding to their client's needs.

173. Hobbles Hobby Home: A small hut, on top of a high rise building. A community often gathers here, on a patch of rooftop green, to practice crafts such as whittling together. A bit of peace from the busy life of Embassy Town...

174. A Peaceful Park: A paintball arena, decorated with smiling bird faces. After the great (if a bit painful) showdowns, the players get together grilling. Honestly, everyone actually prefers the second phase, and will try to skip to it.

175. The Tea-ether: A small teahouse, smelling of incense and patchoulis. Often, Random Lizards get together here, to write poetry about the playfulness of the combined fragnances. This is enjoyed a lot by Hole Worms, especially the ones who have served in the Avant Guard.

[amazing-spiderling]

4 5 6 7 9 11 23 30: anything you're excited about?

4 mythical creature you think/believe is real?

like an all knowing all seeing all scritching super dog who is the goodest boy?

5 favorite form of potato?

There's a place in my hometown, a little diner that's only open for breakfast and lunch. Pancakes, biscuits and gravy, that kind of thing. Their hashbrowns are... special. I think what they do is boil whole potatoes, then when they're cooked through, they roughly chop them, maybe with a knife, or maybe even with a burger flipper on a flat top grill. They throw down some diced onions, garlic, herbs, and then a pile of these already cooked and chunked potatoes on top to let them get warm and develop some crusty bits and it is HEAVEN.

6 do you use a watch?

Only for fashion. I have some very pretty Korean watches that have little decorative miniature scenes on the face, like cafes with a cat in the window and such. I also have a neon blue calculator watch for when I'm feeling my 90's vaporwave self.

7 what animal do you look forward to seeing when you visit an aquarium?

Jellies, probably? Otters if they have that kind of exhibit.

9 do you have a skincare routine (and how many steps is it)?

Not much of a routine- but I have some cleansers and stuff. Honestly if I just feel like my face is kinda oily or I notice breakouts in trouble spots I will throw some onto a cotton pad and do a once over. I also have a facial cleansing soap that I use in the shower because it just makes it easier to remember. I only wear makeup once in a blue moon so I'm not fussed about taking it off on a daily basis etc.

11 anything from your childhood you’ve held on to?

My love of comic books. A lot of my personal belongings didn't make the journey with me when I moved out of state after I got married, and I feel like as a kid my mom had a penchant for throwing away my weird stuff in the name of cleaning up. I do have some old books (just classics like Heidi and Black Beauty) but I never really thought of them as mine. When my parents died I did ask if I could take the dining room table just because of family dinner/sunday lunch memories, that kind of thing.

23 do you wear jewelry?

Most days, not even my wedding ring sdfsdf But when I do J-fashion activities, that's when I tend to accessorize. I do have some pairs of jazzy glasses though, and sometimes I throw on a cool headband. (Usually if my hair is wild)

30: anything you're excited about?

I'm currently working on a not-exactly-top-secret zine with my friends! It's a few months from publication, but people are starting to hand in their work and everything looks so good so far! I'm looking forward to the day we can share the result with everyone! :D

[chaletnz]

El Salvador: Cerro Verde - Volcan de Santa Ana

During the night I thought I heard wind and rain lashing around the tent - while definitely "glamping" it was still a tent and I was worried about waking up with everything soaked. But my bed kept me toasty warm all night and I woke up early for breakfast of toast with peanut butter and banana (no eggs for me). Our Cerro Verde local guide Dionesio took us on our hike up the Santa Ana volcano trail. Walter had to leave to do some paperwork and turned around once we reached the trailhead so Georgi and Emily took on the role of "sweeper" staying at the back of the group to make sure no one got left behind. The trail was surprisingly steep actually and we were all laughing at how we were already sweating and out of breath while we were walking through the forest - we hadn't even reached the open switchbacks yet! It took us about an hour to reach the top of the volcano to get a peek inside the crater. The Cerro Verde National Park website lists this hike as being 4.3 miles roundtrip and 1,532 feet of elevation gain which is heftier than I expected! It had been a steep rocky climb accompanied by a dog that apparently does the hike everyday with a group of tourists. There were a few old boys at the top selling ice creams that they'd lugged all the way up to flog off for 4x the regular price. We took some nice photos individually and as a group before heading back down to the campsite. It’s not really advised to stay at the top for long because the sulfur is so potent up there, we could certainly feel it in our throats even before reaching the top. There were so many people coming up it took twice as long to get down because the trail was super crowded with people puffing their way up wearing jeans and jackets obviously not expecting such a hike! Possibly this one is commonly underestimated... We devoured our included lunch which was soup and panini sandwiches, then a group of us crossed the other campsite (jam-packed with a work team-building event or something) and picked up coffees. I heard Deme ordering a cappuccino with an extra shot so I asked for the same as her. We both got a bit jipped though as they charged us for a cappuccino and an espresso each! Turned out to be a very expensive coffee but they were decent and were served with a tiny straw and a mint. We had a little bit of free time to get changed and rest and then we piled into the van for a thirty minute drive out to the lake where we sat around in the heat getting the worst mosquito bites of the trip. I tried to read my Spanish phrasebook quietly for a bit but then Emily and the group came to chat with me and watch the others splash around. Once we got back there was a bit of a wait for dinner but finally grandma arrived to fire up the grill and started making pupusas for our workshop. We had a bit of background to the famous street food in Central America, it's basically a corn tortilla but other ingredients like cheese, meat, and vegetables are pounded into the dough before it gets fried. We all had a turn to make our own and throw them on to cook. I made one with pork and cheese, I also tried grandma's specialty squash/cheese and spinach/cheese combos. Three was definitely enough as they were very heavy and oily - an acquired taste shall we say! As we ate Walter gave us a briefing on Nicaragua and what to expect with politics and the border crossing, we had some natural drinking chocolate in little clay cups and headed off back to our tents for the night.

[ramuneempiremtl]

Slave-kun's Happy Life in Another World: Chapter 8

When we got out of the bath, the white person approached us and used magic to blow hot air to dry our hair. Are they a mother?

Since calling them "white person" over and over is a bit strange, I decided to observe them a little more closely.

They had light blonde hair and pale blue eyes. Their features were delicate. Their clothes were also whitish, making them appear even more like a white person.

In conclusion, the white person was indeed a white person.

Their name is Nove. Could they be the person my master was talking about who is good at magic?

If I'm not careful, I might end up calling them "mother." I need to make sure to remember their name.

"No, it just won't dry here for some reason."

This Nove person is mumbling something over my head. My hair, which was once a mess, has become shiny after being washed properly.

For some reason, there's one spot that just won't dry, and despite their best efforts, they've finally given up and admitted defeat.

Huh? Oh no!

I'm being taken care of again.

Where has my pride as a slave gone?

If I don't show them that I can do my job properly, I'll continue to be treated like a baby. But for now, I need to get my health back… Oh dear.

"Come over here."

The person with the shield followed and beckoned me to the entrance of the room.

When I entered the room, I was told to lie down on the bed. I did as I was told, and I was so surprised by how soft the bed was that I sat up.

It's not a spring mattress, but for some reason it's very bouncy!

Civilization! The smell of civilization!

"I told you to go to sleep!"

I was pushed back down.

Their hands moved from the top of my head to my toes. I felt something passing through me. Is this not healing magic, but something like a CT scan?

Magic is amazing.

"…Your appearance has been healed, but the bruises haven't. And your internal organs are quite damaged. You won't be able to eat oily foods for a while."

"Is it that bad?"

"Well, I can heal it, though."

The master, who had been standing next to the person with the shield, looked at me with concern.

Oh dear, so the person with the shield is the healer.

With their dull, beige hair and sleepy, deep green eyes, this man seemed to have more muscle mass than the master, who was quite muscular himself.

I always thought that healing was something that gentle women or kind old ladies did. I guess the world isn't that simple.

However, their skills seemed to be genuine. As the person with the shield touched me with their glowing palm, the pain and throbbing disappeared, and the heaviness in my body vanished.

Magic is amazing.

I've been trying to cast a small amount of healing magic by imitating what I've seen, but I can tell that there's a fundamental difference.

Knowledge, perhaps. If I studied magic, I might be able to be more useful. I've been told that I have a lot of magic power.

"It's done."

"Thank you."

"Mm."

Finally, the person with the shield ruffled my hair and left.

The master told him, but I also said thank you to the person with the shield in my heart.

It's inconvenient not being able to speak at times like this.

The master clapped their hands.

"Alright! It's late, but let's have some food."

Yay! Food!

I jumped out of bed and returned to the other room, where a steaming wooden bowl was placed on the table.

Food!

I waited for the master to sit down before I sat down myself. I am a slave, after all. I wonder if it's even appropriate for me to eat at the same table, but there doesn't seem to be anyone here who would care or point it out.

The master had a mountain of grilled meat, soup, and bread, while I had only soup. It's probably barley porridge. It's helpful since my stomach is weak.

When I looked at the cat-like person who had prepared the food, they nodded. The master also nodded and started eating, so I scooped up some with a wooden spoon and put it in my mouth.

…Delicious!

I can't say anything else.

I can't even say that.

The soup had small meatballs floating in it, and the cloudy broth was probably made with chicken stock. It was thick, perhaps from barley or maybe some grated root vegetables. I also think there are some herbs in it.

This is definitely medicinal food.

I feel bad for being treated so well. But it's so delicious that I don't care.

With this, the remaining concern, the question of 'is the food in this world delicious', has also been safely cleared. Food is the foundation of all activities, so it is very, very important.

But it's a bit disappointing.

I think this soup could be even more delicious. I think there are flavors that I can't perceive because my body's sense of taste hasn't developed yet.

The taste buds of Japanese people are cultivated from a young age by experiencing the flavors of various ingredients. It's different from the tongue of a child who has lived as a slave.

My memories contain the taste, but I guess I'm still being influenced by the sensations of this body, so I can't fully appreciate the subtle nuances.

I need to cultivate them.

And then, maybe one day, when I'm gone and the mind of the boy who owns this body awakens, I want him to be able to enjoy the taste of all kinds of delicious things.

…It also means that everything I eat will be delicious for now.

I will gratefully accept it.

Thank you, world.

[blackknightgargiefoodtopia]

Bali Paradise

My buddy and I decided to have Indonesian cuisine, and since he'd been to a place I've never been, it was a chance for me to try it out and give new material for this long awaited bloggie.

Location: Regent Square, behind the last row of buildings at the back

Outside decor

Apparently they also own a spa/saloon/massage parlour which is located right next to the restaurant itself. OK, maybe not massage parlour per se, but still, it does give off that kind of impression. For the record, massage parlours are now pretty much banned in Brunei, and prolly a very minute few are still operating underground. Talk about prohibition!

Setting: Looks pretty Indonesian,but somehow I can't get the feeling that it also has a strong hint of Thai in the design, or maybe that's just me

Random shot of the menu

Our drinks, which is carrot juice (mine) and usual Coke (my buddy)

My ayam goreng Suharti

Side dish of gado-gado

My buddy's ayam bakar special Bali Paradise (I think that's what it's called)

I seriously need to note down everything that we've ordered for better introduction of our dishes. But anyways...

My dish and my bud's are more or less similar, the only difference being that while mine is fried, his is grilled, and our dip is also different, in which his is sambal while mine is green chilli puree. Not sure how my bud's dish tastes like, but my chicken was alright, albeit a little bit oily, but then it's fried, so it's a given, and the meat is a little bit stringy and slightly tough, but still edible.

The gado-gado was interesting. It kinda reminds me of rojak, but the difference is that our local rojak consists of fruits, vegs and glutinous rice, while gado-gado is also glutinous rice, but mostly with just vegs, a bit of seafood and those little bean thingies (can't remember the name) that usually are included in most ayam penyet dishes (and not exactly my fav). The sauce still taste the same as the sauce used on local rojak though.

It's a pretty interesting place. A little bit remote, but the food and the services are satisfying. I'd prolly recommend it if you're in a craving for Indonesian food.

Overall rating:

[40sandfabulousaf]

大家好! After 3 years of not using them due to covid, the glue on my old Puma, New Balance as well as Asics shoes dried up and the soles peeled off after a few uses. Time to replace them with a brand new pair and, after trying - and loving - Anta's leggings, tees, shorts, sports bras as well as backpacks, I decided to try their shoes. On Sunday, I wore them out for lunch. I have flat feet and comfy shoes are important; so far so good, I'm happy with the buy.

Where do friends and I pig out nowadays? At what we view as less unhealthy options than fastfood or pizza joints and grills - ma la tang and suan cai yu (fish with preserved veggies). Broths are a tad oily and salty, but they're less artery-clogging, at least to us. The suan cai yu restaurant that SW and WW brought me to is very popular; SW had to make a reservation in advance. We got there very early, way before the crowds started to form and had the entire place to ourselves for awhile.

There was free flow Roselle and tangerine peel tea to go with our savoury and tangy meal. It was my first time trying the fragrant, citrusy beverage and I liked it! 1 bite of the fish and it became obvious why repeat customers brave the long lines to dine here. Every piece was unbelievably delicate and tender. This was 1 of the best versions of fish I've ever tasted, apart from Hong Kong/Teochew style steamed fish.

JA introduced JL, XT and me to another very popular ma la tang joint, where we shared a pot of seafood, meat, veggies and noodles in their famous wickedly spicy, mouth-numbing soup. The broth was so addictive, we couldn't stop eating until the pot was completely empty! I gravitated back to eating qing after the heavy meals to get rid of the jelak (saturated, bloated, full) feeling and did aerobics on top of my daily calisthenics to sweat out the toxins and salt. To be fair, the meals aren't as heavy as grilled meat or pizza and didn't induce food coma. They're still not exactly qing though and my body felt the difference.

SW is a millenial, thus, I was shocked that she isn't into the avocado craze; come to think of it, neither are WW, MZ, DT, GC, JT and JA. I had a chat with her and found out the reason: like the rest of them, she doesn't believe that avocado is healthy. To us, it is merely a less unhealthy alternative to saturated fat; consuming so much of it on toast or 'healthy grain bowls' is not that different from drinking enough oil to deep fry chicken. Of course, we won't stop others from clogging up their arteries; after all, we believe in personal choice. 下次见!

[india-fish-01]

Top 10 Best Fish to Eat for a Healthier Lifestyle

If you're looking to change your diet and lead more healthy habits, then fish is a fantastic option to include into your diet plan. It's not just full of nutrients and vitamins, but it's also an excellent source of protein that is lean. In this blog we'll explore the top 10 fish that you can eat to live better health.

SalmonSalmon is a very popular fish, which is high of omega-3 fats which have been proven to lower the risk of developing heart disease and boost the function of the brain. It's also a great food source for vitamin D as well as protein.

Sardines Sardines is tiny oily fish that is loaded with nutrients. They're a great source of omega-3 fats, calcium as well as Vitamin D. They're also free of mercury, which makes the perfect option for pregnant women as well as children.

Trout Trout is a fish caught in freshwater that is rich in protein and is low in fat. It's also a great food source for omega-3 fats as well as Vitamin D. Trout can be cooked or baked to make a tasty and nutritious food.

Tuna Tuna is a very popular fish that's high in protein and is low in fat. It's also a great supply of Omega-3 fats as well as Vitamin D. Tuna can be cooked or baked. It can also be served fresh in sushi and sashimi.

Mackerel Mackerel, an oily fish rich in omega-3 fats as well as vitamin D and protein. Additionally, the fish is low in mercury which makes it a suitable option for pregnant women as well as children. Mackerel is grilled or baked or pan-fried.

Herring Herring is a tiny, oily fish that is rich of omega-3 fatty acids as well as Vitamin D. It's also a great source of protein, and is very low in mercury. Herring is grilled or smoked for a delicious , healthy dinner.

Cod Cod is a flaky, white fish that's low on fat and packed with protein. Cod is also a great supply of Omega-3-fatty acids as well as Vitamin D. Cod can be cooked, broiled or pan-fried.

Halibut Halibut is a white fleshy fish that is low in fat and rich in protein. It's also a great food source for omega-3 acids as well as Vitamin D. Halibut is grilled or baked. You can also broiled it or bake it.

Anchovies Anchovies are tiny oily fish commonly used as a flavoring in dressings and sauces. They're an excellent supply of Omega-3-fatty acids as well as calcium.

Tilapia Tilapia is white, mild-flavored fish that's low on fat and rich in protein. It's also a great supply of Omega-3-fatty acids, as well as Vitamin D. Tilapia can be baked or broiled. It can also be grilled, broiled, or baked.

In the end it is a great food item to include in your diet for a more healthy life. These fish choices are all delicious and nutritious and you should consider adding them to your diet for a balanced , healthy diet.

Here are some commonly asked questions on the most nutritious seafood to consume to live a healthier life:

Question: What makes fish a nutritious food choice? A Fish is a wonderful source of protein lean and is loaded with vital nutrients, including omega-3 fats as well as vitamin D and minerals such as calcium. Fish consumption can improve the health of your heart, decrease inflammation, and may even help improve the brain's functioning.

A: Are there any fish I should never eat to avoid health issues? A: Certain species of fish, like large predatory fish such swordfish, shark and king mackerel are known to contain high levels mercury that can be detrimental to your health when consumed in huge quantities. Young children and pregnant women are especially vulnerable to mercury's effects and should stay clear of these fish. It is important to look up local advisory fish lists to find out the fish that are safe to consume within your local area.

Question: How much fish should I consume per week to get the best well-being? A An example: It is recommended that the American Heart Association recommends eating fish at least two times a week, preferably fatty fish like sardines and salmon and mackerel. They are rich in omega-3 fatty acids. But, it's crucial to mix your consumption of fish by eating other sources of protein in order to keep a balanced and diverse food intake.

Question: Can I still reap the health benefits of eating fish through supplements? A: Although supplements made from fish oil are an efficient method of getting your daily intake of omega-3 fats it's best to get your nutrition by eating whole foods whenever you can. Fish consumption can provide a range of other nutrients. It is also a tasty food item to add to your menu.

A: Are there any specific health benefits that come from eating various types of fish? A: Different kinds of fish have various health benefits. For instance salmon and sardines are especially rich in omega-3-rich fatty acids that have been found to lower the risk of developing heart disease and boost the function of the brain. Mackerel also contains omega-3s, which can reduce inflammation. Tilapia and cod are both low in fat and rich in protein, which makes them a great choice for those who want to keep an ideal weight.

[mitchamsocialuser]

Wood Fired Pancetta & Potato Pizza

In a wood fired oven, pizza dough temperatures reach as high as 800 degrees Fahrenheit. To get the best results, use fresh ingredients and a good pizza dough recipe.

Make sure to let the dough rise before baking. You can let it rise for 3–6 hours before making the pizza.

Fresh Dough

This pizza dough is made with a little bit of salt to add flavor, strengthen the gluten (creating a chewier crust), and slow down fermentation, which makes it more palatable. It also contains olive oil which serves several purposes when it comes to pizza crust: It creates an oily barrier that prevents sogginess, it adds color and flavor, and it helps create a good surface to bake the dough on.

You can store thawed/refrigerated pizza dough for 1–3 days* in a covered container. However, the dough will start to deteriorate after a day in the fridge because yeast has eaten all of the good food it needs to rise, and it will go slimy and discolored.

When you’re ready to make the pizza, take it out of the fridge and let it sit at room temperature for 30 minutes before shaping it into a circle. Stretch it in the air, use a rolling pin, or pat it with your hands — but don’t overwork it!

Oil

The potatoes used on this pizza are boiled until very tender, which allows the outer layers to become soft while the insides remain crispy and firm.

Toss the potatoes in a bowl with a drizzle of olive oil, a good sprinkle of salt and some rosemary. Cover the pizza dough round with this mixture in an overlapping pattern, leaving a 1cm border around the edges; don’t forget to spread the pancetta on top.

Once the pizza is ready, transfer it on to a pizza peel and slide it into a preheated wood fired oven. Don’t leave it in too long, or the crust will become crunchy instead of soft and pliable.

Temperature

The perfect pizza oven has a dome shape that disperses the heat evenly and maintains high temperatures. This makes it possible to cook a pizza in less than 5 minutes.

The key to making a great pizza in your wood fired oven is a dough recipe that has the proper ratio of flour, water, yeast, and salt. It’s also helpful to use a flour with around 12% protein content.

For the best results, you can make your own homemade pizza dough or purchase fresh dough from your local grocery store. Just remember to let the dough rest for 30 minutes before you use it on your pizza.

Time

The time it takes to cook a wood fired Pancetta & Potato pizza depends on how hot your oven or grill is. The dough will cook in about 90–120 seconds in a pizza oven with the deck at 800 degrees and dome at 1000 degrees plus, and in 8 to 12 minutes on a pizza stone on your grill.

Start by making the pizza crust. Make sure the dough is quite thin in the center and slightly thicker around the edges. Stretch it out on a sheet of parchment paper that’s been oiled or sprinkled with semolina or corn flour.

Next spread 1 tbsp of olive oil on the pizza crust, then spread the potato rounds and sprinkle with chopped rosemary, pancetta strips, mozzarella and smoked Gouda or Cheddar. Once the toppings are ready, assemble your pizzas and place them in the oven. Bake for 10–12 minutes until the potatoes start to brown and the cheese begins to melt.