#it makes much more sense then why he would carry that big fan around if he was a wind user

[nejiverse]

BLLK BF HEADCANONS

Bachira, Chigiri, Rin, Isagi

In which I write headcanons about how the boys would be in a relationship Fem! Reader

cw: suggestive content, mentions of kissing and making out, the boys are whipped

wc: hell if I know 💀

Bf! Bachira who always feels the need to join in when you’re singing a song quietly to yourself.

—“This isn’t a duo Meguru”

—“No baby it’s actually a trio”

—“Who’s the third person?”

—“The monster of course!”

Bf! Bachira who’s constantly playing footsie with you whenever he gets the chance, just to get a reaction out of you. He loves when he places his cold feet against your calf and you squirm.

Bf! Bachira who loves to lay his head on your chest and listen to your heartbeat as he rants to you about his day.

Bf! Bachira who chases your lips for more kisses. One is never enough for him, he gets all whiny when you don’t give him more kisses so please do

Bf! Bachira who is a back hug enthusiast. He’ll envelop you in a back hug anytime, anywhere with his hands massaging your waist…there was one time where he moved a hand to rub smooth circles around your stomach, rambling on about how nice it would be to see you carrying his child— you completely folded.

Bf! Bachira who’s lock screen and home screen are of you. His lock screen being a picture of you and him making funny faces and his home screen being a picture that he may not want everyone to see, only him.

Bf! Bachira who’s lowkey a yandere, but a less threatening one in a way. He wants to keep you safe and is quite overprotective of you, getting frustrated if he so much as sees another guy look at you, but he does this because he doesn’t have much in life that he truly cares about, but you are the exception and he wouldn’t know what to do if he ever lost you

Bf! Chigiri who acts like he isn’t phased by your little acts of affection like kissing his cheek or making eye contact with him but he is, severely. He discretely plays it off by using his hand to cover his cheeks.

Bf! Chigiri who allows you to touch his hair which is an honour since he had never let anyone else touch it

Bf! Chigiri who always wakes up before you because he tends to be moody in the mornings and doesn’t want to take his emotions out on you

Bf! Chigiri who’s favorite thing to do is pull you into his lap and hug your torso as he rests his head in the crook of your neck as to smell your (insert scent) scented perfume that he loves so much

Bf! Chigiri who enjoys going out on jogs with you even though often you can’t keep up. He’ll turn around only to see you literally gasping for air and will chuckle before spreading his arms out for you to run into, sort of as motivation. He’ll only do that when there isn’t a lot of people around which is why he prefers evening jogs— he’s not a fan of PDA

Bf! Chigiri who allows you to straddle him when you two make out, he is putty in your hands when it comes to physical touch. You enjoyed teasing him in times like these by abruptly stopping and seeing his facial expressions change into an unsatisfied one. He wouldn’t say anything though but his face tells it all.

Bf! Chigiri who has a love-hate relationship when it comes to you calling him princess as a joke

Bf! Rin who will literally force you to watch horror movies with him but will put his hand over your eyes when he senses a jumpscare coming. (He’s watched so many that he automatically knows when it’s coming)

Bf! Rin who has a hand in the back pocket of your pants when you two walk past a big group of people

Bf! Rin who makes sure you’re always on the inside of the footpath and he’s on the outside

Bf! Rin who is generally very subtle with his acts of kindness towards you, to make sure you never call him out on it and tease him.

But when you two are in bed together, he can’t help but spoon you with one hand over your chest and the other across your waist and his chin against the crown of your head— Bf! Rin who is the definition of wolf on the streets but a pup in the sheets

Bf! Rin who when you two are in bed like that is at his most vunerable.

—“You’re never leaving me”

—“You’re pretty much the only person I can tolerate, be honoured”

—“You’re not lukewarm or half-baked…i suppose”

Im sorry but i cannot imagine this man saying ‘i love you’ directly, these are what you’re getting

Bf! Rin who gets annoyed when you pull him on his words being all mushy and cute, resulting in him scooting out to the farthest side of the bed away from you with his back turned to you

Bf! Rin who ignores how you climb on top of him and shake him around, muttering a string of insincere apologies between your giggles

—“You know I hate the back treatment!”

—“Yeah well if that’s the case then you’re gonna have to beg for my forgiveness”

Bf! Isagi who admits to practicing asking you to be his girlfriend in the mirror multiple times before he actually did

Bf! Isagi who is unintentionally always talking about you to his friends

—“That’s also Y/n’s favourite flavour!”

—“Y/n was mentioning that the other day actually”

He’s locked in fr

Bf! Isagi who loves teaching you how to play soccer. He also finds it extremely attractive when he sees beads of sweat rolling down your skin but he’ll never say it to you which leaves you confused as to why his face is so flustered

Bf! Isagi who never breaks pinky promises. He thinks it’s cute that you still believe in them

Bf! Isagi who just thinks you’re the coolest person ever to exist (I can imagine your relationship being like shikimori and izumi if you’ve watched the anime shikimori’s not just a cutie)

Bf! Isagi who’s tongue needs to be held when he hears someone talk bad about you…he gets mad disrespectful

Bf! Isagi who is always mesmerised by the outfits you come up with when he says he wants to take you somewhere nice. His jaw is on the floor every time.

Bf! Isagi who’s got a way with words

—“I hope you know how much you mean to me”

—“You’ve just blessed my eyes Y/n!”

—“Its just..i’m really happy when you’re around”

Masterlist here :)

A/N: this was so fun to write, who should I do next (i haven’t read the manga yet btw😭)

[xdjville]

wayv and their own love languages

pairing: wayv x gn!reader

cw: mentions of sex in winwin's (only in words, no descriptions), yangyang (half)jokingly being a hater in xiaojun's, proof read but i'm tired

author's note: i had to physically stop myself from getting carried away with kun's so it wouldn't end up twice as long as the others man i love him

#kun

quality time

if it wasn't for kun being so busy, he would literally be glued to you at the hip. only with you around he's able to truly relax, you're like a power outlet that he can use to charge his battery. what you're doing doesn't really matter to him that much, he will enjoy anything as long as you're there, but the slow, quiet moments when you're both in your own worlds have to be the ones he cherishes the most. of course, he loves going out with you and having a blast too, but something about those occasions brings him a sense of domesticity and really lets him unwind. like when you're both in his studio - him at the desk, composing or working on lyrics, while you're on the couch in the back with your laptop, focused on your own tasks, the silence being broken only the few times that kun asks about your opinion on whatever he came up with, or when you stand up to get a drink and place a kiss on his cheek as you walk by. or it could be him cooking dinner for the two of you, showing off his skills as you sit on the counter, humming quietly to his playlist playing in the background. every now and then he'd turn around to give you a piece of the food he's making for a taste test, repaying each good idea of how to improve the dish with a kiss.

#ten

thinking about you

ten is pretty much thinking about you every second that he's awake (and sometimes in his dreams, too), he's never not thinking about you. he often gets reminded of you by random things, whether because he thinks there's a visual resemblance (he then usually sends you a photo and a "you lol"), because it's something you like, or because it's somehow connected to a shared memory of yours. he brings you up in conversations a lot too, to the point where some of his friends seem to know you quite well without having actually met you. when he's travelling, he always takes many photos to send you along with voice messages about how his day went, and buys souvenirs or little trinkets to gift you when he's back. on the rare occasion when he's grocery shopping on his own, he makes it his mission to find all of your favorite snacks, which more often than not gets him distracted from the list you had put together for him, so you end up with a bunch of candy and no dinner (which is exactly why him shopping alone is a rare occurance). he also really likes putting together playlists with songs that remind him of you, some of them he'll send and give you access to, but there's also a few he made private which he listens to on days when the longing feels worse than usual.

#winwin

"i love you"

to most, it might seem like not that big of a deal, but to winwin those three words hold more meaning than all other existing ones combined. a meaning that's so important and valuable, binding even, that he uses them carefully and scarcelly in order to not abuse them. for most of his life they were reserved only for the closest family members, then, although in a different sense, also for his fans. saying them romantically for the first time was a whole new sesantion to him, and to be honest it still feels a bit foreign and uncomfortable. not because he doesn't love you, that he sure does and he makes sure to show that in other ways, but actually saying it out loud just makes him feel so bare and out in the open. hence his "i love you"s are usually muttered into the crook of your neck when you're pressed together after making love, breathed against your lips when he breaks the kiss only for a second so you can't see his face gaining more color than it already had, or whispered into your ear as he gently strokes the back of your head, your tears soaking into his sweater.

#xiaojun

sharing

xiaojun doesn't really do this purposefully, as a way to show his affection, it's just that the concept of "mine" and "yours" genuinely doesn't exist in his mind when it comes to you. want a bite of his food? it's yours as much as it's his. out of moisturiser? you probably use the same brand anyways. really like that one hoodie of his? might as well have been yours in the first place. he never expects the same behavior in return, he's totally fine if you value your privacy and he makes sure that you understand each other's boundaries, but he never lets go of that "what's mine is yours" mindset either way. xiaojun really enjoys showing you off ("shoving your relationship into people's faces", as one german boy likes to call it), so you wearing his clothes or jewelry is his absolute favorite thing ever. he then stares at you with heart-shaped, sparkly eyes, a wide, lovesick grin on his face, and the tips of his ears burning red (to the german boy's disgust).

#hendery

being vulnerable with you

very few people get to see the other side of hendery than the cheerful, quirky self that he usually is. the side that's exhausted and afraid, that pains and ugly cries. a lot of doors have to opened to reach it, but he trusts you more than anything and anyone, ever. he doesn't think he could be any more real and unfiltered as he is with you, it's almost like it's more comfortable than when he's all alone. when you're there, he can just let everything go and express his feelings in a way that's most true to himself, without faking or conceiling anything. all those nights he spent crying because of his past, present, and future, because of his fears and scars and sorrows, you've been there for him. and although in the morning when you're tangled in your sheets with puffy faces and dry skin either of you knows better than to mention whatever was said that night, he's truly, deeply grateful, and each time he makes a promise to himself that one day he'll tell you that.

#yangyang

kissing

yangyang's nothing if not a kiss person. it's his favorite thing in the whole world, to be able to just connect your lips until he forgets his own name because yours is all he can think about. little pecks, french kisses, make out sessions, spiderman kisses - you name it, he loves all of them and they're all his favorites, as long as it's you who's on the other end. you often try to push him away because you just ate something with garlic, or because you have yet to brush your teeth in the morning, but none of that really matters to him. in fact, he cherishes every sensation that comes with it, be it a taste of what you ate, the feeling of your dry lips when you forget to put on chapstick, or a string of saliva that keeps you connected after you pull away - god, that one makes him go weak in the knees. he especially likes when you take the initiative, it makes him feel loved and all warm inside (he would never admit that though). and if you lead the kiss, maybe a bit riled up from something happening at work or because you've missed him? oh, he's a goner.

#taglist ➼♡ @bambisnc

©xdjville

[iambilliejeanok]

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!! “sleeping with” WITH BUDDHA IM BEGGING YOU I WANT TO CUDDLE WITH HIM AND DO THE NASTY AND CUDDLE MORE 😫😫😫😫😫

Warnings: 18+, overstimulation, dacryphillia, smut, nsfw and saw headcanons, (The Buddha mentioned is a character from the anime Record of Ragnarok and doesn’t depict the true nature of the real god Buddha. It’s fiction), fluff.

SFW

Maybe its because of his overwhelming love for humans and the fact that he was one too, Buddha needs all the cuddles all time. He loves love and genuinely enjoys the feeling of something in his arms, whether it be a human, an animal, or maybe even a stuffed animal. Yes, Buddha has a stuffy collection for his alone times indeed. That being said, if whatever he’s cuddling could wrap themselves around him and cuddle him back? He melts right then and there. It might even be better than eating candy under the pleasant shade of a tree in the Valhalla.

Buddha will most certainly not see sleep without being able to rest in your arms. He’s as clingy as a koala with how often he needs to feel you around him and most likely cuddles you all day. There’s never been a day hot enough to dampen his desire to be on you. “No baby, don’t you think its too hot?”, you try to reason, hoping he would be understanding enough to let this go just one time. “Why worry, the AC is running so you’ll need me anyway you dig?”, he says, gently taking your hand in his and pulling you into his chest, “Come now, let me pick you up angel”. And picking you up is something he does often, you see being a god, nothing is impossible and lifting you up to carry you from any position isn’t any problem at all. You don’t even need to jump. Sometimes, he will gently scoop you up with a single arm, desperately needing for you to constantly hug and kiss his face while you sit on his arm and lean against him, snuggling him while he prepares some snack bowels for the two of you.

He’s a big fan of sharing his candy with you, opening every single wrapper and feeding you whichever piece you desire. His hand is almost as big as your face, leaving you with no choice but to submit to his soft lips melting against yours with his hand firmly holding your face in place as his tongue slips into your mouth. You’re always eager to have some of whatever candy he’s eating, and he always going to share it with you, especially during a kiss like this.

Randomly squeezes you throughout the night when he changes positions. Buddha doesn’t actually need to sleep, but he loves the idea of falling asleep with you, so he makes himself sleepy whenever he sees you’re sleepy too. And in public the PDA doesn’t change much. He’s god so what’s anyone gonna do? Sits you on his lap everywhere the two of you go, unless you demand to sit on another surface, he will let you have your way with a cute pout on his face, that obviously goes away with a few soft kisses against his lips, but only he will decide how many kisses will do the trick. You just keep kissing him.

He’s so wholesome, how can you resist all that love.

NSFW

Buddha also doesn’t experience any sexual desire, but he knows a mere human like you battles with that, sensing even the slightest arousal you experience, which to his amusement, is always within his vicinity. You’re actually always horny, since he’s always in your personal space, so smooth without even realizing it. However, he does understand that what he does to that empty little noggin of yours, always filled with thoughts of him defiling you in ways even he finds entertaining. Eventually, he does approach the topic, hearing your thoughts from all the way in the kitchen while you thought about him in the shower, grabbing your breasts and tweaking your nipples as you freely moaned, confident that the running water in the shower drowned out your sweet sounds. “Woah,babe, you really want me to do that to you?” , he loudly chuckles, caging you against wall of the shower. Maybe you did have a heart attack at the sudden presence of your lover butt naked in the shower next to you, a heart attack he quickly reversed. He’s so close you could feel his skin pressing against yours, your pussy so hot and wet and Buddha knows its not from the water, swallowing the spit building in his mouth at the thought of your arousal on his tongue. “Bud-Buddha, wai—“, you whimper, knowing how overwhelming he can be at times.

Excited to fulfill another one of your requests, he’s already on his knees in between your legs, your thighs resting on his broad shoulders while your back is leaning against the smooth stone wall for support. “Buddha please!”, you whimper, overwhelmed with the anticipation of what he’s about to do to you. You’ve never gone a session without crying from the intense amount of pleasure he gives you and boy does he love comforting you through it all. It’s just so addictive how needy and dependent you are under his touches. He has so much fun playing with your body, his tongue plunging into your aching vagina, smiling at the sharp gasp you made, not expecting him to go that route so soon. Both his large hands on your hips, you know there’s never any point in fighting him as he starts sucking your swollen clit, flattening his tongue to lick your entire vulva before repeating his actions, your hand caressing your breasts while you bite your lower lip, submitting yourself to whatever happens.

He might be a little obsessed with you because he fucks you purely for your enjoyment, not that he’s not enjoying himself too, its just that he knows you need him like this and he revels in spoiling his sweet little angel rotten. Slowly plunging his thick, long member deep inside of you, his focus is only on your face, admiring the cute faces you make struggling to handle such a stretch, your hands gripping his biceps for dear life as he goes impossibly deeper, randomly pressing kisses on your lips while your mouth is open to accommodate your breathing, more kisses decorating your face as he thrusts his hips slowly. He’s just completely mesmerized with how stunning you are, his patience never running thin to make sure you’re thoroughly overwhelmed, slipping out of your pussy only to try and shove himself into your asshole. “Uh uh uh, its okay pretty, you’ve got this”, he says, trying to encourage you to take him, knowing damn well he’s making a complete mess of you. You’re literally whimpering, choking on a scream with every thrust into your tight asshole, his godly cock massaging every inch of your walls, his thumb reaching down to start massaging your clit, a small smirk on Buddhas face when he feels your making a mess, the shivering of your thighs growing more violent as he keeps the same pace, his thumb still massaging your clit, “Buddha!!! no no I can’t”, you say out of breath, only hoping he understands you, but you know he’s not ending this here. “Shh shh angel, you can take it, gimmy kissy, c’mere”, he softly says, he’s warm breath on your face, finally pulling his dick out of your rectum to realign it with your squirting vagina. Crying out loudly, you could feel him rub himself along your clit, knowing what this meant. You begin kicking your legs, attempting to crawl away from him before he simply holds you down your thighs, pulling you closer to him again, pushing himself into you again, moving slowly since he was too big move too fast. “Fuck!”, he growls above your cries. “Fuck! No sweetheart its okay, keep coming for me, you’re such a sweet little angel you know”, he coos at you, his only goal to fulfill your fantasy…a fantasy you obviously can’t handle.

[000-pawz]

how sungho loves ( zodiac series ) ˚ · .

how i think sungho would navigate relationships/love/communication based on his natal chart/birth chart!

wc: 1k+

more under the cut!

"trust, honesty, and devotion" are the first three words that enter my mind when i look at sungho's chart!

to put it simply, sungho isn't a "flirt". he'd rather pay attention to the little detail about you and act accordingly!!! he can come across as a rather quiet lover, preferring to keep his feelings at bay until he is completely sure that you are as serious about the relationship as he is. because of his virgo sun, he usually avoids taking risks, so he thinks through every possible outcome of confessing his feelings to you before he actually does. it's not easy for him to let people in romantically ><

sungho is very intentional and direct with his words—he does not beat around the bush. because of his mercury in virgo, he kind of carries a "no nonsense" attitude when it comes to his relationships. if he genuinely likes you and sees a future with you, he's not going to pretend he doesn't! he only involves himself in relationships he sees as worth the effort, and trust that he will give his all when he's serious about you ^___^

with his moon being in sagittarius, i see his main love language as quality time. he likes to be active, so he enjoys dates based around exploration like traveling and trying out new things! he loves, loves, loves spending time with you and gains so much energy from being in your presence. he enjoys banter and a sense of playfulness in his partner.

he's a huge fan of acts of service as well. he'll do all of the chores around the house, buy and cook you as much food at you want, help you brush and dry your hair. anything he can do that helps you relieve stress, he's on it. with his mars in pisces, he just wants to please you. his main goal is for you to happy and proud to be with him. he needs to feel needed and valued!! he's especially sensitive around his waistline, so please give him hugs around the waist! it makes him feel so secure.

since his venus squares pluto, he loves very deeply and intensely. he's ready to live through thick and thin with you and grow together to become better versions of yourself.

sungho loves quietly, but his small actions should never go unnoticed! the best way to make him feel loved is to make him feel appreciated and noticed. a "thank you", "you're doing so well", "you've been working so hard", or a "i'm proud of you" goes a long way. he doesn't need any flashy acts of loyalty or a shakespear poem recited to him. he just wants to know that you love him and appreciate him.

when it comes to ideal types, i think sungho is someone who is attracted to those who can stimulate his mind, bring something new to the table, and are equally as adventurous. he likes people who are honest about not only their feelings for him, but their own internal emotions. sungho especially likes people who can handle his sarcasm, push and pull, and match his wit.

he doesn't have time for people who are unsure of what they want! he lives passionately and is most compatible with those who can keep up with his pace and enthusiasm for life. he likes when his partner is confident and simplistic, but never cocky. i have a feeling that he appreciates those who aren't always in the spotlight, as well!!!

sungho is a very optimistic person because of his sun conjunction with venus. ^___^ he tries to see the good in people, but he can overly critical at times. it's never his intention to hurt anyone! he's just very blunt and straightforward when it comes to his feelings. this is why it's important for him to have a partner that understands his true nature and complexity, rather than just seeing him on the surface level.

trust is a very, very big thing for him. he's completely open and honest with his feelings, and he expects his partner to do the same. if he feels like his trust has been broken, he can be pretty confrontational. if he's especially stressed or overwhelmed, he can be very sensitive, but because of his mars in pisces, he forgives very quickly. he hates the feeling of being upset with you and he'll want to work on any problems immediately and thoroughly.

sungho isn't immune to jealousy either. with the slightest hint that your attention or interest is moving away from him, he'll internalize those feelings. with his moon conjunction pluto, he has a habit of to hiding his negative feelings which can result in emotional outbursts and arguments. this can lead to a lot of guilt because rationally, he knows that you love him, but he overthinks a lot. since his sun squares his moon, he has some conflicts with emotional insecurity. he can get fussy sometimes, so a person who can provide him with patience and security is ideal.

one way you'll know for sure if sungho is in love with you would be him relinquishing his control. his sun, mercury, and venus are all ruled by virgo so he innately craves management and order. he strives for perfection always, but this can lead to built-up tension and stress if he doesn't have a safe environment to retreat to. vulnerability is a sensitive thing for him with his moon in sagittarius. people who don't know him that well can see his values of independence as aloofness or being scared of commitment, but that is the opposite of the truth! his passion for his lover shines through when he gives up control.

this give-and-take relationship is the key to balance and stability with sungho. when sungho feels completely comfortable with you, he'll let you take care of him for once. try being the big spoon, playing with his hair, and letting him vent to you without inputting your own opinions. (and he'll never admit it, but he loves being babied as well.) he'll turn into putty in your hands <3

reblogs are greatly appreciated! lmk what u think or if you have any other takes!!! i'm always open to learning more :o thank u...<3

series masterlist

masterlist

[zweiginator]

stepson!patrick!!!!!! reader is not much older than patrick but the way she carries herself intrigues him. he should hate her but he feels attracted to her instead so he just touches himself at night thinking about her, making up all the possible scenarios he could to get her to slip up… to just forget about her morals and get with him instead. they end up sitting on their living room’s couch when his dad wasnt home. reader getting closer and closer and saying shed let him fuck himself on her hands. a subbier side of patrick coming out

patrick coming home from tour pissed because word around town is that his father has a brand new plaything. not even that, patrick heard she's pretty young, maybe a few years older than him. but the thing that really cuts deep for him, really makes him slam the door when he gets back from tour, is that your father had a whole courthouse wedding. didn't tell his son and married a woman he's never met.

but then he sees you on the couch. you look like you could be his peer. and you extend your hand out for him to shake but you can't stand up because you're painting your toe nails blood red. he smirks because his father would be livid if he knew you were doing this.

and god, you're so pretty. it would make more fucking sense for you to be his girlfriend and not his fucking stepmother.

and you knew that the zweig's had good genes; that's why you were okay with marrying a man more than twice your age. but seeing patrick makes you gulp and you wonder if the life of being a trophy wife was the right choice for you.

because sure, you enjoy the huge mansion, and the brand new SUVs. you like the galas and the gowns you put on your husband's amex. but, there's something about how patrick is looking at you.

he sits next to you on the couch and talks for hours. leans into you, animated. it's clear he knows how to pick up women. that it's easy for him to throw his arm around their shoulders and bat his big green eyes and have them pinched between his pointer finger in his thumb within minutes.

but, you ask him how tour has been. you can't do that. stroke his ego and ruin your marriage all in one fell swoop. your posture is straight and confident as you fan a magazine over your freshly painted toes and patrick just slumps down. what the fuck is he thinking, trying to pick up his stepmom like she's some girl at the bar?

"it's been okay. lonely, hence why im back home for the time being."

and then he mutters something about needing a shower. really, he needs to jerk off. and a mass of guilt hovers over him like the wave of a tsunami while he leans his head against the shower wall. he watches how his cock spasms as he strokes it, twitching with pure, pent up need. desperation. and he cums, sputtered moans leaving his lips. he hopes the sound of the water muffles them out completely.

and for the next few weeks patrick really just wants you to break. your father is rarely home so he picks up the slack. mows the lawn, does the dishes, trims the hedges with his shirt off.

you make him lunch, and bring him fresh lemonade as he wipes his forehead with his t-shirt and you don't allow yourself to look at his abs. the sweat trickling down his lean body. how his biceps flex as he practices his serve in the backyard.

and patrick is always so appreciative.

"these brownies are delicious!" wipes the excess chocolate from his chin with his thumb and sucks it into his mouth. you almost fucking whimper but you just thank him and tell him there's more on the counter.

there's one night where something inside you shatters. maybe it's because your husband has been gone on a business trip for almost a week and he still hasn't even bothered to call. maybe it's because it's late at night and you're lonely, watching shitty reality television on the couch, checking your watch. patrick went out at ten and it's almost three now.

and then he stumbles in, tipsy but still there. collared linen shirt half unbuttoned and his neck peppered with kisses, memorialized by cherry red lipstick.

he sits next to you on the couch and he smells like liquor.

"are you okay? do you want water?" you hand him your glass.

he leans in and shakes his head. "i'm fine."

his words are less slurred than you expect them to be and then he just slumps over. falls asleep on your lap and you pet his hair. he drools on your thigh and you cover him with the throw blanket and let him sleep for awhile.

but his head is heavy and your leg is falling asleep.

"patrick." you gently wake him and he springs up.

"'m sorry. shit, how long was i asleep?"

"not long."

patrick just stares at you, staring at the tv.

"what?" you ask him.

"you're so fucking pretty. dunno why you'd marry a douche like my dad."

your stomach does flips but your demeanor stays solemn. your husband rarely compliments you. and here his son is, looking at you so lovingly, like it's the best gift in the world to just sit next to you.

"don't talk about your father that way." but you don't say my husband. maybe to separate yourself.

"you know it's true."

and you find yourself inching closer to him until you stroke his chin in your hand.

"do you think about me often?" you ask him.

patrick nods. "all the fucking time."

"inappropriately?"

your other hand rests on his abdomen, dangerously close to his belt.

"i--i think about your pussy. tasting it. being inside you."

you unbuckle his belt.

"that's disgusting, patrick. why would you think of your stepmother that way?"

he fucking whimpers.

"because you're gorgeous--"

"you're a pervert."

he nods. "yeah, im a pervert. but--"

you unzip his pants and yank them down his legs. his boxers go along with his jeans. his cock is hard and long, red, desperate, perfect.

"but what? you're a dirty boy."

his cock leaks from his sensitive tip and he just stares at it, and then you, and then it again. a silent plead for help.

"i'm sorry-"

you yank his head closer to yours by the messy hair at the nape of his neck, holding your hand out. you don't say a word.

"spit." you finally say.

he's already drooling like a dog so it's easy for him to gather the saliva pooling under his tongue and let it pool in your palm.

and then you wrap your hand around him. the wetness makes a lewd, disgusting sound. but you don't move your hand.

"fuck--i. jesus fucking christ." patrick tilts his head back and tears are stinging his eyes; he's never been this fucking hard, girls have never made him work this hard and god, he's so frustrated and his hips jerk up.

"there you go. fuck my hand."

he looks at you with his darkened gaze and his mouth hung open and he wants to kiss you but he knows he can't. not unless you kiss him first.

the sound is loud, of him fucking your fist. his spit dribbles down the seam of his balls and he almost cums every time your thumb brushes against his tip. and you grip him harder, pull him closer. he's almost cradled in your arms, although he's so much bigger than you. your lips are mere centimeters apart and patrick is whining and mewling and saying please over and over--but he doesn't even know what he's asking for.

"are you gonna cum?"

patrick nods and you slap his cheek. you want to see what he'll let you get away with.

"use your words, honey."

"yes, i--can i cum?"

"i don't know why you're asking me. you're a big boy. you can cum."

so he does. and it's clear even though he didn't need to, he was awaiting your permission. and his cum is hot; ropes of white paint your fist and his chest heaves. you tell him he's made a mess.

so like the good boy he is. he sucks your fingers into his mouth to clean them off.

you tell him you need to go to bed. and you try to ignore how you're wetter than you've ever been.

[saintbarou]

you convince yourself javiers a beta for so long until he gives you the bandanna he uses to cover his face because he can let himself get caught but it's not good if you do.

so you let him wrap it around you and let his fingers brush against your nape when he ties it for you. and you inhale his scent so closely for the first time and it's like you know right away. can feel him linger in your senses and make the omega in you whine and preen and you think oh.

you mumble all shocked him being an alpha and he's surprised. so surprised he stops and laughs and asks, you think a beta could care for you this well?

tags: 18+ minors dni / omegaverse / omega reader / alpha javier / let me know if i miss something

The night is cool which is why the burning of Javier’s warm hands looping through your hair to tie his bandanna around your face makes you tremble. You can still hear the shooting and yelling of the stagecoaches you had just robbed with the others in the distance.

You were only the bait - a pretty, sweet smelling omega to draw out the victims of your ploy to have them be robbed of everything short of their drawers and the gang is taking precautions to make sure no one picks up on your face. Javier is grinning at you as the too big fabric goes around your nose and drapes down to your chest.

It smells like him - light and sweet of spring water with the depth of petrichor.

So much so it makes you swoon, preening out little chirps as you are soothed with the scent of an alpha over the adrenaline of the robbery. So much so you are leaning into him, until the crown of your head rests against his chest to purr and you can hear Javier laugh as he coos out to you.

“You’re n’ alpha?” you mumble with lidded eyes and rubbing your cheek into his chest for more - more of his scent, more of the rain and the sweet spring water. You can hear him laugh gently into the night air, the moon bright among the sea of night and his hand settles on the top of your head. Javier has nice hands, you’ve noticed it when he sits to play his guitar and when he plays finger filet at the table with the other men. The calloused palms settle on your hair with a softness you never would have thought he could exhibit and it makes you whine all the more for it.

“You think a beta could take care of you this well?” Javier jests, tone light and jesting but you hear the shock coloring the words. It makes you look up at him and you whimper at how handsome he is in the moonlight - pretty dark eyes fanned by long lashes, scars adding to his face’s charms. If you had a tail it would be swishing behind you making it so obvious at the fluttering in your stomach at being so close to a handsome alpha, a strong alpha, an alpha that -

“-smells so good.” you mumble, purring as you rub against his chest. You feel him twitch and clearing his throat ; you don’t know it but you’re scenting him and scenting him well, covering Javier in the decadent scent of cinnamon and vanilla omega-want that’s making it hard for him to focus on leading you both back to camp.

Especially when so many instincts in his body are telling him to scent you back, to take you off Boaz and to take you here - in the open where the downwind can carry the scent of sweet rain and warm cinnamon so everyone can know what occured in between the trees.

“Come now, let me take you back to camp -“

You whine in indignation. You don’t want to go back to camp, you want your alpha ; you flush at the thought of an alpha like Javier being yours and chirp in embarrassment. He laughs a little under his breath at the sound, grinning boyishly at how you hide from him. You’re exactly what he thought you’d be like - bashful little omega who wants so earnestly.

“I’ll let you scent me all you want when we are there.” He promises, voice soft with adoration that makes your ears twitch. Your face still hidden from his view is warm to the touch and you only nod to show your willingness. Javier laughs under breath and makes sure the bandana is on.

He doesn’t want the law to get your pretty face on any wanted papers. Nor does he want to share the sweet little lovestruck love on your face when you look at him to be seen by anyone else.

“Do you promise alpha?” You ask, so timid and eager it makes his teeth cut into his lip from how far his grin stretches.

“Yeah, promise.”

[14muffinz]

You know those aus? Where the characters are combined or 'fused?'

I've been thinking about that under the circumstances of a tmnt crossover fic. Where this combination is unwilling.

So the way I can see this going means it absolutely has to involve rise, which I also like because it allows for funky designs. Some mission in the hidden city, possibly involving big mama because ✨drama✨, and each boy is fused with their counterpart.

This can be very different depending on the iteration, so I'm just gonna write down vaguely I imagine each one being:

Leo: Slightly obsessive with training. He's passionate, but maybe a bit too much. He's a great strategist, but is unfortunately bad at explaining his plans to his brothers. The more anxious he is, the more talkative he becomes, usually spouting quips to distract himself. Has knowledge with a bunch of different weapons, but prefers the classic katanas.

Raph: Anxiety. This boy is stressed at all times, and the only way he knows how to mask it is by grouching, or hitting things. The people around him are infuriating, especially because they keep asking all these questions. Like, he's just one guy, why can't they get that? Raph carries both his sai and tonfa, but will more often fight with his tonfa.

Donnie: Very smart. Their brain processes information very fast. They like when things make sense. They're also the only fusion aware that they're a fusion, which, like Raph, they are not a big fan of. Their fusion is the least stable, defaulting to we/us and preferring they/them over he/him, though both are acceptable. They don't remember what each button on the tech bo does, but they do have a staff with a taser on each end as a comprimise.

Mikey: Wholsomest boy. The only reason he doesn't know about the fusion stuff is that the Aprils and Caseys don't want to burst his bubble, but they're all pretty sure he could take it. Big fan of art, he loves to cook as well but due to conflicting knowledge they don't do it as much as they would separately. He loves the extra long chain he gets from rise Mikey's kusari-fundo, so he uses that, though similar to the Raph's sometimes they'll carry around nunchaku as well.

~~~

So yeah, the supporting cast were not on this mission and thus were not turned. They received an emergency alert from rise donnie's systems while everybody was being fused, which is the only warning that they got.

It's mostly on Draxum to make a fix, but it's unfortunately not that simple because they're from different dimensions. Casey JR (is it alr if I call him June because I'm gonna fair warning it's instinct) tries to help where he can, but his knowledge is limited. There's a big argument between the Aprils over whether or not informing the Mikeys of the situation and letting them help would speed things up or not.

The issue with telling them, is Raph's very much denying the information. They know about it, but they refuse to listen. The Donnie's took a lot of convincing as well, and the topic clearly causes them a lot of distress, though they refuse to explain exactly why.

That's all I've got for right now. But if anyone wants to help me make this a solid au, please shoot me an ask. Please. I'm begging. I really want to have more to say about this but I need someone to pick my brain.

Tag is forced fusions au!

[mamamittens]

Oh, Sweet Child of Mine (Pt. 11)

Platonic Whitebeard Crew & Reader-Insert

Main|First|Previous

Warnings: Yandere behavior (somehow I think I managed to loop Teach into it now too, so congrats, you've charmed a bastard man). If you find yandere content uncomfortable, please do block the tag 'oh sweet child of mine' as well as any relevant variations to 'one piece yandere'.

Do not tolerate this behavior in real life.

Stay safe and have fun!

If my mental math is correct, I should finish this in 4~ish more chapters. So we're nearing the end!

Also, surprisingly sympathetic take on Teach's backstory, didn't know I had it in me. This is assuming the fan theory that he's from a winter island and was with Whitebeard since he was young, btw.

Word Count: 2,099

Teach grinned as his new crew set the sails to leave the small island he’d recruited them from. Dawn was just breaking and he wanted to make good time—just in case he already had tails from his old crew. He wasn’t entirely sure how much of a head start he had given the rush he was in to ensure Thatch didn’t eat the fruit. Decades looking for it and he nearly lost his chance again.

He adjusted your limp body under his arm for a moment, enjoying the palpable feeling of his power increasing from the contact. The shadows seemed to writhe hungrily at his senses, eagerly awaiting his command in a way they simply didn’t without you. You… well, you were a bit of last minute surprise as well. Sure, in theory, he could just take your fruit but he wasn’t confident it would work the same way. And he couldn’t risk wasting it if it didn’t. Besides, you’re the perfect bait.

He has the power. He has the plan. Now he just needs the reputation to become the Pirate King. And what better way than taking down his old crew one at a time? Sowing chaos to fracture them until Oyaji is too weak to stand against him and properly claim rise to his lofty goals as ‘Blackbeard’. Killing Thatch would certainly get someone on his ass, though he was torn between commanders as to who it could be. Izo was sore enough about losing old friends, and Marco may feel responsible as first mate. But Ace—well, he was a spitfire at the best of times and his old commander to boot.

Taking you was sort of like kicking the hornet’s nest. While also becoming even more powerful in a single move. How could he not do it?

The minor issue of ensuring you never have a chance of squirming away was easily solved with a bit of chain. It’s not like you were particularly strong, though you were smart enough to not do anything too risky—which he appreciated really. Though he’d prefer you sticking around willingly if only to not have to carry you every time you fell asleep.

Teach chuckled a little to himself as he returned to his newly minted quarters. You were wearing down pretty fast the longer he was ‘on the run’. No real chance to properly rest or recuperate from what must be a stressful situation—for you at least. If he neglected to feed you every now and then it only helped ensure you were weaker than before. Who knows, he might not even need the chain if this kept up.

Teach set you down on the sparse bed, unhooking his end of the chain to secure it to the latch on the wall. It wasn’t like he was going to use the bed himself. He paused a moment to watch as you curled up against the wall, completely dead to the world.

Heh. Cute.

He didn’t get why Oyaji recruited the way he did. Pretending to be a big family when they were actually just a band of pirates taking what they wanted. Too soft for a man with the strength to do anything he desired. Too many vulnerabilities. But every so often he thought he understood it… a little. Late night parties with lighthearted competition. Long running arguments about inane subject that both parties are a little too invested in to be serious.

Teach reached down and removed your glasses, examining the cracked lens. Bending it in the light to watch it refract as he considered your position. His prisoner and, technically, first mate. Though he wouldn’t be having you fight—not that he’d trust you to fight for him right now. He had the absolute upper hand over you. Chose to stay his hand. Because you had use to him.

He heard you shudder a little and paused, setting the thick glasses down. You were cold—weak body sensitive to the relative chill in the room. Unbidden, he remembered long, cold nights on his home island in the snow. Powerless and unsure if he’d survive to see daylight again.

Until Oyaji found him. A small, frail part of his chest ached at the memory. The sheer relief that he was safe now. His next meal guaranteed at no cost. No more cold, lonely nights. Even now, he calls him that. Oyaji. Despite fully planning to kill him. The idea didn’t conflict in his head. It was simply the way of things. Old replaced by the new. What higher respect could he pay his father-figure than personally ensuring his demise to further his own prospects? To step out of the shadows and get rid of one of the few people alive that can remember the sad, pathetic child in the snow?

Perhaps this strange sense of sentiment was his own, personal weakness. Crafted by a man too weak of heart to truly conquer the seas.

Teach shrugged off his coat, laying it over you gently. Chuckling when you stopped trembling.

He was a pirate. He could indulge in whatever vice he wanted… though perhaps cautiously. It wouldn’t do to deride Oyaji for something he, himself, was guilty of in excess.

He didn’t get why Marco took you. Why Oyaji agreed to take you in. Well, aside from your devil fruit. But the soft glove approach smacked of weakness given your surprisingly stubborn refusal.

But the slow, rolling satisfaction that settled in his chest knowing that he made sure you weren’t cold… he thought he could understand Oyaji a little better now. Why he kept picking up strays everywhere he went so indulgently in the same way he’d sneak sips of good booze when the nurses weren’t looking.

It was a strange, frail sort of pride to partake in. Pride at providing. But Teach learned at Oyaji’s knee to take enjoyment from the little things in life.

Besides, it wasn’t like you could sell him out or take advantage of what scraps he gave you. As long as you behaved, he supposed there was no problem in these small gestures of kindness. So long as you never forgot your place, that is.

--*--

Luffy laughed, loudly and with glee as his older brother teased his crew. He was so proud of the people he’d recruited so far and wanted Ace to see what he did. Those bright, beautiful sparks that drew Luffy like a moth to flame. The spark that Ace himself had since they were children that only grew since they parted. Ace was still hurt, a little broken inside, but it had healed since they last met.

“Why are you here, anyhow?” Nami asked, “I thought Whitebeard mostly stuck to the New World?” Ever inquisitive, Luffy’s smile widened at how clever his navigator was. Ace scowled, tipping his head towards the man he brought with him.

Pineapple. Well, Ace called him ‘Marco’ but obviously Pineapple was better. Tall and blond with bright blue eyes—achingly reminding him of Sabo but different enough that Luffy could barely see the ghost of his other brother.

“We’re tracking down a traitor. He tried to kill one of our own and kidnapped another.” Pineapple scowled with dark eyes. Luffy’s crew was shocked—giving Luffy the impression that this was an even bigger deal than he first thought.

“A nakama-killer? Who?” Ussop asked breathlessly, “What kind of monster would make it out from a Yonko ship after that?!”

“Teach.” Ace hissed in a way that reminded Luffy of the few times he said Bluejam or Celestial Dragon. Fire flickering between his teeth. “He goes by ‘Blackbeard’ now. Promise me if you run into him you won’t fight him, Lu. He nearly killed Thatch. You’re not strong enough to fight him yet.”

Luffy made a noise of surprise, both at Ace’s words and the name.

“Hey, didn’t we already run into him?” Zoro asked, glancing at Luffy for confirmation. Luffy remembered the weird pirate well. Poor taste in food and rude as hell.

“Yeah, we did actually. Weird guy with a weird laugh. With the tired four-eyes.” The two looked at Luffy sharply. “I almost got in a fight with him but he weirded me out.”

“Tired four eyes?” Ace asked with a pissed off expression. Luffy felt a small twinge of guilt for not helping the stranger at the time, but something inside him whispered ‘not yet’.

“Yeah. They were connected with a chain. Thought he had a slave or something but Nami said it wasn’t quite right.” Luffy explained. Nami nodded, tensing slightly as the two looked at her for more answers.

“Well, usually slaves just have the collar. And he didn’t make any demands or order them around. They just had to… follow him. He even yanked them by accident and apologized. Most slave owners don’t bother with that.” Nami huffed.

Luffy pouted. They looked promising. He even felt… weird when they were around. Like he was stronger somehow. His heart like a steel drum in his chest. Like he felt when he was around his nakama. But they lacked a… spark. Like they lost it and Luffy didn’t know how to give it back. Almost tried anyway but his crew stopped him.

He hoped that next time they found that spark again. He’d love to have them on his crew.

Ace nodded.

“We’re getting close, at least. Hopefully we’ll catch up to them soon. Who knows, we might be able to introduce you guys properly!” Ace grinned, the edges a little sharp like he was suggesting dine-in-dashing when they were kids and hunting crocodiles was too much of a hassle. Luffy grinned.

“I wanna meet them again! Hey! Hey! Ace, do you think they’d join my crew?” Luffy cackled when Pineapple and Ace jolted at the question. Ace narrowed his eyes, clicking his tongue with a thin smile.

“Oi! Don’t go stealing from my crew, you little shit!” Ace hooked his arm around Luffy’s neck stretching it out as he gave Luffy a noogie through his hat.

Luffy squirmed, crying out at the unfairness.

“Ack! Aaaaccee~! They look cool. Though really tired! I promise to take good care of them! Ace!” Luffy complained. Arms failing uselessly as Ace kept him pinned in place. “Ace!”

Luffy’s crew watched with wide eyes as Pineapple smirked from his spot against the wall.

Okay, that felt a little like Sabo.

--*--

You looked out at the growing island, Banaro, chain wrapped around your waist so it wouldn’t drag across the deck. You knew that Teach would come over shortly to reattach it to his bracelet. For the past couple of months, he’d given you relative freedom while at sea and restricting your movement once they got close enough to an island. For the most part, you’d been avoiding the crew, which Teach encouraged.

Probably to make sure you didn’t get any outside help, not that you felt confident you would have received any if you’d asked.

The closest chances to escape you’ve noticed was the revolutionary early into your capture with Teach and Straw Hat—surprisingly. Not that you think Teach knew that.

Though the occasional spotting of a sea king was also promising, Teach had them firmly sail in whatever direction was away from potential pods. Kill joy.

Anyway, it wasn’t that Straw Hat was stronger than Teach, he was definitely a bit too green to manage it given Teach’s decades at sea.

But… that devil fruit of his.

It called out to you. Boundless as the horizon. A drumbeat that vibrated your soul. A call to… something. Something just out of your reach. And you had the sense that if you had only known what that ‘something’ was, Straw Hat would have thrown hands the minute he saw you.

The pirate seemingly breathing in sync with his fruit, only held back by how weak he was currently. Which was a strange thing to sense. Usually fruits were just not utilized well. They didn’t typically hold such obvious power that the user simply was unable to access it at that time.

It felt elastic. Snappy and twisting in a way that you found delightful. Made you want to laugh without even hearing what he was saying.

You smiled a little. Strangely optimistic for the first time in a long time.

Pirate King, huh?

… Somehow, you felt as though Straw Hat Luffy would shake the world. And despite being a ex-marine, you looked forward to it.

Hopefully, you’d be in a position to see it for yourself.

[universallydestinytaco]

@happylittlefuzzyguy

This will be the perfect opportunity to go into detail of a fanfic I always wanted to share with this fandom overall, I have told some of my friends prior about this is.

I’m just gonna say rn that my absolute least favorite episode of this entire series has to be The Enchanted Forest. Crazy I know one of the most Charpim-coded episodes and it’s my least fave, why? Now before I turn in my “queer Smiling Friends fan” card, lemme explain because I have many reasons: first off, Mip is an ugly little cockroach bitch who I wanna stomp on and grind with the heel of my sandal into a hot concrete parking lot, also I felt like the episode felt lackluster in terms of writing where as hilarious as Charlie becoming a fantasy hero is the song that the little creep sings is a dragged out, repetitive gag that wears out it’s welcome and it would have been way more interesting if Pim wanted to prove how he could be a hero even without a sword like he could be a mage with a wand or a pacifist hero…hell wouldn’t it have been funny if Pim did become the sword-wielding fantasy hero and tried to impress Charlie who is too busy bonding with Mip?? Also why the hell did Charlie get so easily attached to Mip anyway maybe it was the potion messing with his head or maybe if this episode had way more time to cook maybe it could have established Mip as an old friend of Charlie’s so Pim feels extra jealous and insecure. One big gripe I also had was how generic the Princess looked. I was expecting her to resemble Lady Amalthea from The Last Unicorn to correspond to Mip being designed in that Rankin Bass style. Maybe it’s just me being an animation nerd.

That’s why I have been working on my own rewrite of this episode to make more sense and to be less predictable and more in-line the show’s usual spontaneous and subversive writing style alongside amping up the Charpim energy! I call this: “The Enchanted Forest Remix” and boy do I have many drafts of this idea in my head, sometime after my other fanfic wraps up I might write this one, I could sketch out my ideas for the current iteration of it too because I like the idea of Pim wearing a dress and carrying around a sword for some reason haha. Wanna hear more unpopular opinions? Drop a 💛, for another fanfic idea I haven’t shared or talked about as much yet, drop a 💚.

Reply to this post.

[thesherrinfordfacility]

Longwinded anon again. It's very easy to see where Aziraphale needs to get his act together/get therapy in regards to his belief in Heaven's essential goodness (and it was always very odd to see fans believing that four years would have been sufficient, narrative-wise, for that to happen--four years is nothing to characters who are immortal). Crowley, though, is still doing one of the most toxic things on his side of the relationship: he's being over-protective. In S1, the "damsel in distress" bits, which I know some fans like to romanticize, are harmful to both characters, because they make Crowley feel like he's doing something heroic when he isn't (every rescue in S1 is unnecessary) and encourage Aziraphale to abandon his agency. In the narrative arc, Aziraphale's discorporation, which Crowley fails to stop, is liberating. He does his conscientious objector bit, chucks himself out of Heaven, kicks Crowley out of his depression in the bar, vanishes the soldier, and then has to forcibly remind Crowley at the airfield that /now/, in fact, Crowley needs to do something or there will be irreversible consequences. And then they rescue each other through the body swap.

S2 doesn't have the big swoopy rescue scenes, aside from the 1941 replay, but what it does have is Crowley withholding key information that might well have altered Aziraphale's behavior. He clearly hasn't been forthright about what Gabriel really said at the execution, and he never gets around to mentioning that Aziraphale has put himself in danger of being zapped out of existence by Heaven. (This is very PRIDE & PREJUDICE: Lydia elopes with Wickham in part because her older sisters don't publicize his bad behavior.) Again, he thinks of himself as Aziraphale's protector, and while Aziraphale knows that Crowley likes to protect him--he even says so--in S2 he doesn't fully understand what Crowley is protecting him from. Nina asks Aziraphale why he doesn't stick up for himself, and he shows once again that he can, but in S2 Crowley thinks it's his job to keep Aziraphale safe from any real Heaven-sent nastiness that might puncture his innocence. Which prevents Aziraphale from evaluating his choices once the Metatron shows up.

(As for S3: Gaiman does appear committed to getting them together in their cottage, so I don't think a permanent breakup is on the horizons. I do think something drastic has to happen, whether becoming mortal, becoming a "new" sort of immortal being tied to Earth rather than Heaven and Hell, Aziraphale delivering a full-bore public rejection of Heaven with attendant consequences, etc.)

Longwinded Anon✨, light of my life, you are officially driving me insane with these asks (screenshots of others under the cut); there is so much fascinating insight to talk about. first of all, though, welcome back and i hope you are also Surviving following s2!✨

these two characters are two of the most fun to dissect and examine. they are hugely multifaceted, and every time i watch s2 and ruminate on them, there is more and more to find. the below is the result of those ruminations, and i feel the obligation to warn anyone reading that it is going to be a very, very long one, so ✨buckle tf up✨

further messages from Longwinded Anon✨, my beloved:

aziraphale: insecurity

to me, one of the key tenets of aziraphale's character is a deep-seated and complete sense of insecurity and lack of self-esteem. and it's not unfathomable to think that he's had a lack of self-worth for some time, carrying all the way through to the Feral Domestic™ (FD). bear in mind that all of the below is without reference to the pre-fall scene, which ill cover separately later on.

there is however the fairly obvious element that heaven and the archangels completely disregard aziraphale, and are condescending and reductive in how they perceive and interact with him. aziraphale, i think, adopted this mindset pretty heavily in s1 - one such example being the "I'm soft" line - and it is further explored in s2, but specifically at the later end.

aziraphale in s2 seems much more self-possessed and 'together', and a key element of that shift is not only his liberation from heaven, but also that he somewhat starts to see himself through crowley's eyes as possibly being worthy of being loved. i think that he starts to think of himself as, in fact, having intrinsic value.

this is shown, in particular, in s2 by the contrast between ep2's rock scene (where he starts to question the depth of his angelic allegiance, and that he might have actually done the right thing by following his own personal conviction and helping save job's children), and the majority of ep5 (ie. his absolutely astounding - by aziraphale standards - amount of confidence in himself to get him and the ball attendees out of demonic danger).

this is brought to a head though by shax's comments in ep5, where she really drives a stake into the core of aziraphale's insecurity. she remarks on his propensity for indulgence (sushi/meals), his tendency to be overtrusting and naive ("softest touch"), his lack of traditional angelic quality ("went native"), and the question of what exactly crowley feels for him ("emotional support angel").

setting aside Michael's acting - which was truly mesmerising in this one little scene, probably one of his set-pieces in the show, honestly - that tells us that this really got to him, we know from everything we have seen of aziraphale in GO that these are likely thoughts that he has repressed, or pretends are not conceivable when they absolutely are.

my final interpretation of aziraphale's insecurity, however, is not necessarily that he thinks he is without value or merit whatsoever, but that he is not enough.

he's good enough to guard the eastern gate, but not good enough to keep adam and eve from temptation. he's good enough to guard and monitor the antichrist, but not enough to be truly accepted as part of the heaven hive (his physical sentry post on earth notwithstanding). he's good enough for crowley to run away with to alpha centauri, but not enough to convince crowley to choose to stay and fight with him to prevent the apocalypse.

this starts to wane in s2, and he's noticeably more happy and confident... right up until ep6 when he's good enough to be loved by crowley enough to spend eternity with, but not enough for crowley to sacrifice his hang-ups with heaven and help him rebuild it as a team so noone else ever has to suffer what they both did.

the lines however in ep6 that particularly broke my heart, because aziraphale literally conveys this whole painful, bleeding part of his psyche to crowley, are the following:

a: "if im in charge, i can make a difference."

a: "i don't think you understand what im offering you."

whatever the motive behind metatron's offer to aziraphale (and therefore calling into question the sincerity of his compliments to aziraphale), aziraphale has literally just been told that not only does someone who - whichever way you slice it - is the highest being in heaven that he has the ability to run it, but he has the ability to completely gut and rebuild it for the better.

harking back to ep1 with crowley's statement that aziraphale only calls him for three reasons, one of which is telling crowley something clever ie. his own achievements, it does make me wonder how often this scenario truly happens. maybe it does happen often, but what does aziraphale actually consider to be an achievement? something to be proud of himself for, that is purely reflective of his ability and - by extension - worth?

when aziraphale tells crowley that he might be misunderstanding what aziraphale is offering him, i don't interpret it as anything to do with restoring crowley; instead, i just see aziraphale telling crowley that he is offering up absolutely everything that he is, every single atom and aspect of him, and all crowley has to do is trust him enough to take it. he is saying that he will love crowley, and crowley can be free to love him, but only, in aziraphale's eyes, if crowley can accept aziraphale as he is; that he is enough.

during this whole part of the scene, crowley won't even look at him. won't even face him, sunglasses or not, and acknowledge what aziraphale is saying, right up until this line. you can visibly see that aziraphale starts to get angry that the one person who made him feel any self-worth might in fact have never seen him as good enough in the first place, that crowley didn't in fact love every part of him, and was choosing to cherrypick the aspects of aziraphale that suited crowley, rather than the whole.

this snippet of the scene is compounded by being sandwiched by these two crowley lines which, in my eyes, really highlighted that crowley is in fact only choosing to accept aziraphale in small measures, and that other elements of him are not enough:

c: "...you're better than that, angel!"

c: "you idiot, we could have been us."

aziraphale is enough exactly as he is; he's not perfect and certainly not wholly complete, but for crowley to dig at aziraphale by intimating that he is not reaching the bar that crowley has set for him - potentially subconsciously - is likely be the true end for how much stock aziraphale put in crowley's perception of him, and by extension the worth that he thought he had in crowley's mind. instead, aziraphale is now left to find a way of building his sense of self-worth all by himself - and does so by stepping into that lift.

crowley: salvation

im not going to necessarily talk about all the times that crowley demonstrates an almost pathological need to be aziraphale's saviour, because frankly Longwinded Anon✨ has that covered. but as with all things GO-related, i think it's important to try to understand why.

i truly think that a cornerstone of crowley's romanticism is deeply rooted in the concept of salvation. now, we know that he doesn't appear to give a flying fuck about salvation from heaven, but he certainly seems to put a great deal of import on being aziraphale's hero, and later he seems to question a great deal when aziraphale essentially finds a hero elsewhere.

as LW Anon✨ said, aziraphale is very cognizant that crowley likes to play hero where he's concerned, and seems simultaneously resigned and excited by the matter; resigned because actually, sometimes, aziraphale is smart or powerful enough to keep himself safe, but excited because this is possibly the epitome of how crowley expresses his love for him.

aziraphale shows that he is fully aware of this characteristic of crowley's, and whilst he does play into it (which we saw throughout all of s1e3) to 'make crowley happy' (and, dare i say, also because at this point it is the supernatural, sex-less interpretation of centuries-long foreplay) in s2 it almost starts to become neglectful, overbearing, and dismissive of - as LWA✨ says - any true agency that aziraphale has built since breaking from heaven. this, incidentally, is highlighted in the following exchange:

c: "im gonna get the humans out of here and then im coming back, i won't leave you on your own."

a: "i know, but i have a suggestion-"

c: [interrupts] "ive got this."

whether crowley feels like he is missing any genuine overture from heaven to apologise for making him fall for a minor infraction, or he feels guilty about something that he did (ie possibly what made him fall) and is making his own reparations in the outlet of constantly being aziraphale's saviour, the one that is certain is that crowley has to feel needed, and by extension - loved.

he does have a nasty habit of putting aziraphale down (which ill talk about next), however much in jest, and placing aziraphale constantly under his metaphorical wing. aziraphale going so far in s1 to actually work out the apocalypse and proceed to take what he believes is the right action to prevent it on his own must have, by extension, sent crowley reeling - if aziraphale can in fact look after himself, where does that leave crowley? what else, in crowley's eyes, could he possibly bring to the table that would make aziraphale want to keep him? love him?

i think that this is crowley's own brand of insecurity; that unless he is performatively saving aziraphale and protecting him from harm, and actively dismissing aziraphale's ability to protect himself sufficiently enough, he has no discernible quality that aziraphale would want. so instead he tries to make himself so integral to aziraphale's survival so that aziraphale has no choice but to keep him.

the fact that aziraphale saves himself in s1, and they then reflectively save each other, did wonders for aziraphale in progressing as a character. however, in crowley, i feel that this frightened him so emotionally that it regressed his character somewhat. all coming to the climax of when aziraphale, in good faith, offers crowley the chance at salvation for himself, crowley vehemently refuses it and takes it to insult. there are many other valid and understandable reasons why crowley rejects the prospect, but one of them to me is that it would leave crowley's fundamental role in aziraphale's existence as completely redundant.

both: demonstrating love

essentially what i put in an ask recently, but needed referencing here too.

leading on from crowley and his hero/saviour complex: the thing is that these are two diametrically opposing people in all but a handful of aspects. crowley by large is usually the more obviously demonstrative in his affection, borne out of many different reasons, and he is the ultimate Acts of Service (ft. Quality Time) dude. aziraphale tends to be more subtle, with Looks and Words, in how he displays his, so let's give him the Words of Affirmation (ft. QT) crown.

in s2, it seems to me that this hasn't really changed, but they are starting to cross over into speaking the language that the other understands. and to me, this comes to a head by the time of the ep5, and the ep6 FD. so obviously crowley has finally bridged into verbally demonstrating to aziraphale how he feels. aziraphale did the same action but mirrored by - however misguided - offering crowley the chance to be restored.

but neither want what the other is giving; they want what the other usually does to show their affection. aziraphale wants crowley to demonstrate his willingness to be with aziraphale by coming with him to heaven, and crowley wants aziraphale to acknowledge what he is telling aziraphale and respond in kind. neither are at fault for wanting that; they have simply demonstrated their devotion to each other in different ways, but those ways have been quite damaging.

crowley does do a lot for aziraphale, that can't be denied, but AoS is way more demonstrative, and yet it's easy to miss what those acts are actually saying. WoA can be more casual but the words you choose speak volumes... "our car/bookshop", "id love for you to help me", "my friend crowley", etc.

whilst i don't necessarily subscribe to the psychology of love languages, they're useful for this sort of analysis. aziraphale does even branch out in other languages; he is constantly touching crowley this season; the pub, the ball, the bookshop in early ep6. quality time is a given, and has always been their common ground. giving gifts im not so sure on, but i think the significance of readily offering crowley the bookshop as being his - something that was wholly aziraphale's, not heaven's, and is aziraphale's own sanctuary - spoke volumes.

specifically in ep5 however, aziraphale really goes ham in demonstrating to crowley how he sees love, defines it, and that he could give this to crowley - the pinnacle of this being the dance and the evident romantic implications of it... it summarises all of aziraphale's own romantic idealistic make-up; touching, intimate conversation, choosing crowley as his partner, romantic literature, classical music, etc.

and whilst comedic and obviously reflective of crowley being otherwise preoccupied re: demon incursion, i also thought that the physical imagery of aziraphale literally dragging him to the dancefloor, and crowley questioning when they've ever danced in the past, was particularly telling about crowley's reaction to how aziraphale is trying to convey to him, without saying the words, that he loves him.

aziraphale in s2 truly does give crowley everything that he can. his love is quiet, and gentle, and romantic, and whilst not as high stakes as saving aziraphale's life, it is still valid. however, it seems that where aziraphale seems to have recognised his feelings quite early on and acknowledged them early on, having time to settle them into his soul (even if he couldn't act for fear of heaven), s2 seems to indicate that crowley refused to acknowledge his until the eleventh hour.

but crowley's love has been there all along, ticking away. ignoring his tendency to stick his oar in where it isn't needed (saving aziraphale and treating him as if he were made of glass), he shows his love in his own ways - following aziraphale around soho, silently supportive, admires him for calming down the bookshop and handling the IB situation, tidies the bookshop for him (which also possibly indicates that he's now finally accepting the bookshop as his home), etc.

both of them take a swan dive in the declaring-love endgame in ep6, but neither of them are responsive to the love language that they usually give. aziraphale is given words but wants actions, and crowley is given actions but wants words. the chronic lack of communication between the two of them throughout the show is the main contributing factor to this disconnect, and leads to serious ramifications in their ability to possibly mend it going into s3.

aziraphale: pre-fall

at the risk of daring to contradict LWA✨ in their assessment of aziraphale's feelings towards the angel-who-crowley-was (AWCW) in the pre-fall scene, upon reflection i don't get the sense that aziraphale falls in love with AWCW in this moment. and exactly as pointed out by @assiraphales, we don't have any of the gaps filled in between this scene and The Wall, so it's arguably unknown when exactly those feelings deepened.

there is definitely attraction of some kind (can angels experience physical attraction? presumably they do, if aziraphale thought the "gorgeous" comment was directed at him), an admiration of AWCW's abilities, and an immediate concern for AWCW's wellbeing if he were to question god. but i don't get the sense that he falls in love; more that he's bumped into a cool, attractive kid outside his locker and immediately starts spouting angelic heart eyes, and at the least develops an immediate fascination.

AWCW is presented as being rather classist in this scene, and whilst not outright maliciously rude, he definitely seems to look down on aziraphale, or consider him relatively inconsequential. which is odd, because i think if he actually listened to what aziraphale was telling him, aziraphale actually comes across as having his own brand of status. i can't imagine that any bog-standard angel would be entrusted with helping god with building Her ultimate creation, building humans, and being allowed to see the Great Plan. whilst maybe not the same level as AWCW, i think the fandom is underplaying aziraphale's own significance in this part of the story.

the fact remains however that the aziraphale we see in this scene is still the fundamental foundation of the aziraphale we see later on in the story. AWCW calls for him as he's wandering (rocketing) past, and aziraphale doesn't hesitate to come to AWCW's aid. he's presumably going somewhere, but prioritises helping someone who needs him, and does so out of kindness and then, it seems later on, out of attraction.

he recognises the achievement of AWCW's nebula, asks questions to learn more (and thus demonstrating his interest) of the construction and purpose of AWCW's craft, and outright compliments it for its brilliance and wonder. all behaviours that id say is rooted in wanting to establish a friendship, and meanwhile developing an arguably shallow crush.

i think that these are also general admirations that aziraphale brings forward as he gets to know crowley as a demon, but has to adjust his world-view that he may admire the principle if not the act; he thinks crowley is clever and fun and talented, even if he doesn't condone the new ways in which crowley displays this.

there are definitely times where aziraphale is still caught up in crowley being a good person and concluding that crowley must still be an angel in all but name, but i do not necessarily think that he thinks lesser of crowley as a demon out of maliciousness. i think it's hard for aziraphale to conflate the two ideas that a) crowley has moments of being a good person regardless of hellish or heavenly identity, and that b) crowley doesn't want to be an angel. aziraphale still parallels good with angelicness, holds being good (and therefore being an angel) as the epitome of character, and can't as a result understand that if they were given the opportunity to change and improve the bad bits of heaven, why crowley wouldn't want to help him.

as LWA✨ says, the further we see their story progress, it becomes clear that aziraphale then begins to hold himself above crowley morally, and this is largely lynch-pinned on their separate identities as an angel and demon respectively. aziraphale constantly bats crowley down and puts him back in his place throughout s1, but less so in s2; in this, id refer back to aziraphale's insecurity around his being a good enough angel, but now that we have the context of AWCW having been aziraphale's technical superior, doing this possibly helps him to feel better about himself. this is abhorrent behaviour and is not at all kind, that can't be denied, but i think it is however possible to empathise with it.

aziraphale has spent a long time having an endless reserve of love and not having a lot of places where he can meaningfully channel it. he's got humanity and earth, but whilst he certainly cares for it, it doesn't mean that he candidly loves it. he still feels kinship to heaven and the other angels, but he certainly doesn't love them. in fact the only person he's ever had to fully pour out his love has been into crowley, but faced with the prospect that crowley may still be like his angelic self in that regard (ie not love him back), i think that love has been repressed so much that it's almost atrophied and turned self-destructive and self-sabotaging. in that context, whilst awful and generally inexcusable, aziraphale's behaviour starts to make sense.

crowley: Lucifer theory

i will preface this by saying that despite initial excitement, i don't necessarily think that crowley was lucifer in the colloquialised sense that we regard lucifer in general culture, but perhaps more represents lucifer in the wider sense of having a story that mirrors the one we can somewhat attribute to lucifer. whether or not he will actually be named as lucifer i think is up for debate, but in any case let's take a look at what lucifer's story actually entailed.

now i realise that i am absolutely not an expert on the matter, but there are indeed a wealth of misinterpretations where lucifer as a biblical figure is concerned. i am very behind on this discussion, angelology (shudder) is not in my limited repertoire of specialist subjects, and i welcome anyone else adding in their thoughts on the matter.

but if anyone else has zero knowledge on lucifer, like me, we'll start with the basics as i see them. name coming from the Latin for light- or dawn-bringer, lucifer has been linked to the planet venus in various tellings in roman mythology. given the occasional bright illumination of the planet as seen from earth, this is in part where we coming to the moniker Morningstar when also historically referring to lucifer. so on this base level, we have the link between lucifer and crowley by way of celestial context.

now down to a potential mistranslation, the hebrew for the name of satan, helel, has become synonymous with the name lucifer, down to their respective translations akin to the Latin for 'light-bringer'/'morningstar' as above, but that does not necessarily indicate that lucifer and satan are the same being. so this is where im fairly confident in that whoever crowley was, which is possibly lucifer, his story ran parallel to that of the former relatively unknown being and not the latter more infamous one.

crowley has referenced lucifer in s1, which has led to the debunk that the two are the same being, but when rewatching it, i think it can be completely reinterpreted:

c: "i never asked to be a demon. i was just minding my own business one day and then... "oh lookie here, it's lucifer and the guys!"... ah, hey - the food hadn't been that good lately, i didn't have anything on for the rest of the afternoon..."

this doesn't need to mean that AWCW was the one who came across lucifer and cohort, but possibly that someone else did, or just exclaiming it in the general sense. getting whimsical in the headcanon space, AWCW may well have been enjoying his afternoon, chatting with friends that he thought he could trust, and thought he could share his thoughts on challenging how things are run (same as he did with aziraphale). evidently, whatever happened completely bit him on the arse, and at minimum partially resulted in his fall.

there are multiple references to crowley being at least an angel of import, almost too many to count. however a common theme in many references to venus in various religious and mythological texts is the concept of reaching for higher power, but to be cast down and punished for it. given the indication (iirc) from interviews and also the pre-fall scene that crowley was up for collaborating with god on how to improve things in heaven, it could stand to reason that in a moment of anger or frustration he voices the thought that he could do a better job running the place.

and if other angels were behind him in this, equally dissatisfied with their lot in heaven, and being set aside by god in favour of humanity, it similarly wouldnt be a huge leap to think that this one sentence, this singular half-baked thought, might have precipitated the war. following said war, as LWA✨ suggests, it would make sense that in an effort to lick his wounds and keep a low profile, crowley would take or accept a middling rank in hell, and possibly even volunteer for the assignment of original sin; all the more opportunity to remove himself completely from the narrative between heaven and hell.

which then, now that i think about it, completely recontextualises crowley's aversion to being a part in helping aziraphale rebuild heaven. why would he want to, why wouldn't he be petrified of it, when the last time went so badly? there must be a sense of resentment towards aziraphale in this regard - what makes aziraphale, a potentially lower angel, so special that he would be invited to completely revolutionise heaven, when all AWCW did was make suggestions, and end up being villified for it? if he did join aziraphale, and challenged him, would aziraphale then be forced to cast crowley out again? what would crowley stand to lose this time?

so this is where i think the concept of crowley having a huge secret that he's keeping from aziraphale comes into play, and i agree must come out in s3. it would completely derail any faith that aziraphale had in crowley, for him to have kept such vital information from him, his potential part in the fall. i could imagine aziraphale interpreting the reveal of this secret as being that crowley fooled and hoodwinked him, however false or unintentional that might have been, and it representing the last vestige of aziraphale's innocence and naivety being swept away.

edit, because @baggvinshield has put this theory so eloquently and with far more comprehension and education than i could hope for: Lucifer theory

there are so many more topics that i have sat in various documents and in my notes as concerns these two characters; aziraphale's obsession with control and 'playing god', their shared inability to communicate effectively and meaningfully, crowley and his propensity for unintentional temptation, whether the love between them truly equates to any semblance of trust, etc etc. some of these topics have been alluded to in the above, but i felt that the above essay might be sufficient reading for now. im adoring (if a little bemused by it) the amount of discussion this silly little blog is generating, and im always more than happy to share my thoughts on anything GO-related where people want it!!!

and now - back to answering the hundreds of asks that have accumulated whilst i've hyperfixated on the above. ta-rah!✨💓

[callsign-relic]

addendum (for my long ass ask before) because i also have to mention size stuff and panicked when my ask started getting really long

the size stuff was minimal in the movie but SO SO GOOD. my first thought when i saw Orion next to the guards was "oh my god hes so SMALL."

AND SENTINEL KNEELING DOWN WAS A REALLY GOOD SCENE!!!! AND THEN ORION KNEELING AMONGST THE MINERS AS A PARALLEL?? my heart!! at both those scenes my brain ALSO immediately went what if cogless bots were EVEN smaller though. which truly is the g/t fan in me kicking up a storm. like IMAGINE those scenes with a more dramatic size difference. would it make sense logically?? NO, BUT STILL.

ALSO ALSO. D-16 in comparison to Megatronus ('s dead body) was... wauuhhhagh. Him was BIG.

(im. really sorry i keep rambling in your inbox. like B, i just cannot stop talking.)

- init

OUGGH OMG I didn’t even THINK it was a parallel you’re so right!!! Sentinel kneeling down condescendingly, yet Orion doing so genuinely.

OUUGHHHH DUDE WAIT THIS IS A GENUINELY INCREDIBLE IDEA. Like ok it would not work for the full movie but SHHHH LET ME DREAM MY G/T DREAMS. I’m just imagining,,, hougghhh I’m just imagining the miners being human sized/really tiny while the cogged bots are huge. My god omg the miners living like borrowers among cogged bot society…

My brain is running fucking wild. Like imagine the medbay scene bro. That bit with Airachnid’s legs entering the frame before she does, but so much bigger. Her massive eyes scanning the medbay before she tells Sentinel it’s all clear. And ugh omg… Orion and D rearing their heads back so far just to meet Sentinel’s gaze as he merely tried to get comfortable in there. He has to stay crouched down on all fours because the tiny medbay is too small for him. It was a miracle he and Airachnid got inside in the first place.

Or omg him meeting up with D and Orion at a place that’s his size, and at first he kneels down, but he’s like “how rude of me, let’s get a better look at our favorite little miners, shall we?” Before plucking them up from their spots and holding them both in a single hand. uugghhhh imagining him carrying them around in his tower, only really half listening as he does other things with his free hand, occasionally throwing them a glance or two like “mhm yup I’m listening” when he really doesn’t give a shit.

What is wrong with me. Why am I sentinel pilled

Oh wait I know. He’s a giant cocky bitch. And that is exactly my type 🧎

Once again PLS do not apologize!!! I love hearing your thoughts!!!! Especially if they’re sizey thoughts 😏 HRHEHEH

[hanzajesthanza]

a few of the most witcher plot-relevant and interesting things i learned from reading more interviews with sapkowski:

he originally intended the witcher pentalogy as a trilogy, but when he came down to it, he realized the time spent between the release of each book would be too long (causing people to lose interest in and age out of the series), and that each book would be very, very big. so he decided to structure the idea as a pentalogy instead, and wanted it to be called the Witcher Pentateuch, however the publisher wanted to put the Witcher Saga. and thus it was known as the saga, a name he does not like…

the events of the short stories “sword of destiny” and “something more” were initially intended to be part of the cycle—not bound with the rest of the short stories. this is owing to the fact that they are about ciri and her bond with geralt.

sapkowski was planning the witcher cycle around the time “a question of price” was being published (‘89). it was maciej parowski (as well as a fan at the time) who noticed the rising action and pointed out the idea of a hero (heroine!) being born as geralt’s surprise child, and a cycle about this hero born to the witcher. sapkowski hadn’t actually considered this before it was pointed out to him; however, he then developed the idea from there, and allegedly began to develop the cycle in this year. the very first idea of which that he had was the fight between of bonhart and the rats—a scene which would only appear in print almost an entire decade later in ‘97.

the fish soup geralt’s company makes is real and actually one of sapkowski’s specialties, something he has made a lot when he goes fishing. the recipe is genuinely his, including cahir’s hauberk which they use to strain the soup—in real life, he used gauze to strain the soup, because a colander was too much to carry with him in his equipment. this all is not particularly surprising because it is known that he fishes a lot, but it is somewhat interesting to me because he has said he usually practices catch and release. in another interview, he attests to his own cooking skills and says out of everything he cooks he’s best at making soup, particularly fish soup.

(i’ve known this one for a while, but while i’m at it!) the deaths of the characters which die in the last book were all planned, no dice-rolling involved (sapkowski often rebukes the accusations that he writes by “rolling the dice,” as if he were DMing a D&D game (which he did, actually, by the way, back in the day) ridiculing the idea that: “snake eyes popped out, so i killed them”). the deaths of the members of geralt’s company at castle stygga were very intentional as a rebuking of the “black citadel” trope. but at the same time, he says, “it was more difficult with the vampire, i admit” and there were versions of the last book in which regis survived. however, it is necessary that regis dies because it takes all of vilgefortz’ power to kill him (… so, logically speaking (although this is not D&D!) regis’ death is the primary reason why vilgefortz can even be challenged by geralt at this point—which makes me think, had regis not pulled such a stunt, vilgefortz would have killed geralt and yennefer! … this makes the line “though i mainly owe my life to…” make a lot of sense.)

[tetsunabouquet]

Hello, I stumbled across your page while searching (in vain) for Vancha March x reader fanfics. Your NSFW alphabet was so detailed and I really enjoyed it.

Please feel free to say no, but I was wondering if you’d be happy to take a request for some more Vancha content? Fics/headcanons/blurbs… anything really! I’d love a Vanchaxreader fluff/smut fix if possible?

Have a great day ☺️

A/N: Of course I'll write more for Vancha! To be honest, I am kind of taken aback by all the Vancha requests, in a positive way. I've never met a Darren Shan Saga fan in the wild, so I am pretty happy there are multiple Vancha fans interesting in my blog! I'll be writing a fluff fic set in the new timeline Darren created when he travelled back in time, with the reader being the bonus mom to Vancha and Evanna's kid because to be honest I need daddy Vancha too. I hope you like it too!

Today was a sunny one, so you expected Vancha to be outside. Despite the fact Vancha was perfectly okay if you slept during the hours of day, you stopped doing so for the past few months. Little Eleri was growing up so fast and like her father, she wanted to go out in the sun and train herself like he did. She was proving to be a tough as nails little girl and you had a tough time keeping her in line. You didn't wanted to risk her training like her father whilst she was still a developping, small child. Much to her chagrin. Vancha understood your intentions and surprisingly had agreed, telling Eleri that "in the wild, cubs stay with their moms until they are old enough for the hunt". She had pouted at your green haired lover, but neither of you could be swayed. Eleri was at her usual spot, her big blueish green eyes glued to the door, waiting for her father to come back with a slightly sulking expression. You sighed. "Sweetie, why don't you go to bed? It's important for growing children to get their sleepy time." She looked at you before she shook her head. "Nope. I want papa to tell me a bedtime story." She said and whilst you knew it was an excuse, you could not deny that Vancha had a lot of interesting stories to tell whenever you tucked the little sprite into bed. Honestly, you were glad that she didn't went as far as to copy her father's sleeping habits as sleeping on the ground next to Vancha wasn't always comfortable. The two of you had made sure she got everything she needed, including a top notch cabin in the woods to live considering her twin wasn't allowed to enter the mountain. Gannen, Evanna and their son were frequent guests at the cabin. It was for more reasons then just promoting peace between the races and making sure the future was one of pacifism. As a small child, Eleri would have been the only kid at the mountain and honestly it broke your heart a little to imagine her having no friends to play with. This way, she could at least play with her brother and you honestly felt grateful she had a friend. Almost as if he sensed Eleri waiting impatiently in front of the door, it opened and Vancha stood in the doorway with his red skin. He grinned as he saw his daughter jump up like an overtly excited puppy. "I see my little sprout is fighting her bedtime like a warrior." He complimented her as he hoisted her up. You shook your head with a loving epression on your face as you closed the door. "She wanted to wait for you to tell her a bedtime story," you explained. "Please papa? I want you to tell me that story about the bear again!" She pleaded excitedly and Vancha threw her in the air before catching her. "Of course my little one." He winked at you as he carried Eleri to her small room, which aside of a bed was filled to the brim with presents from vampires all around the world. When she was born, the vampire race rejoiced at her birth and she probably had the largest and most expensivve baby shower in history with pretty much everyone wanting to give a gift to the daughter of the vampire prince. Some of them turnt out to have some darker intentions with her, but Vancha would get rid of those with a swiftly delivered death sentence. Another reason to live far away in the wild where only his brother and Evanna could find him. Vancha placed her on the bed with a careful tenderness that fatherhood has bestowed upon him and your heart melted as he stroke the hair from her face. Eleri grabbed her favorite stuffed animal, a tiger gifted to her by Larten Cresley that wore a beautiful ribbon which once had decorated the hat of her uncle Hibernius. Vancha cleared his throat and began his story, "This happened over a century ago, when I was training deep in the Carpathian mountains…"

[boltupbitches]

Lover - Nick Bosa - Part 2 (spin off of Sliding in the DMs)

18+ content ahead!

Athena chewed nervously on her lip as she waited for Nick’s car to pull up. The ‘not a date’ three weeks ago at the cafe was a success. She enjoyed her time with him and found him to be very charming and humorous. It was interesting how when she looked up an interview with him in it, he spoke very slowly and had a mellow voice. Yet, when they were together and spending time in each other’s company, he spoke more and with a slightly quicker pace to his voice.

They ended up exchanging numbers that day as well.

Athena felt a giddy sensation rush through her at the idea of seeing him again in–person even though they were just facetiming an hour ago.

Just as she was thinking about the trip to Napa they were about to go on together, she saw a sleek, black Tesla pull up in front of her apartment complex. It was Nick’s as he rolled the window down and waved at her.

Putting the car in park, he got out, stretching for a moment before making his way over to her and leaning in for a hug. She leaned up and wrapped her arms around him in return, feeling him give a light squeeze, his hands resting just above the swell of her backside. 

Nick leaned back and placed a gentle kiss to her cheek and then smiled at her. “Someone looks ready to go to Napa.”

Athena blushed and smiled back at him. “I’ve been so excited all week. Do you think this is too much?” She did a light spin around, showing off the light blue sundress she was wearing. She had her hair pulled up with a matching ribbon, a few loose curls complimenting the look. She was wearing a simple pair of white Keds to pull it off. 

Nick scanned over her body, his eyes lingering on the bust of the dress, which had a ruffled hem that dipped just low enough to show a bit of cleavage. He looked back up to Athena’s face and grinned. “You look beautiful, Thena.”

She blushed at the use of the nickname and his compliment. When they met up for their ‘not-a-date’, Nick had taken to calling her Thena, dropping the ‘A’ at the beginning. Normally that would have annoyed her, but she thought it was cute coming from him.

He gestured to her two suitcases and said, “Let’s get this loaded up and head on over to the airport.”

“Did you purchase tickets already?” Athena asked, wanting to know how much to reimburse him. “Let me know the cost and I’ll pay you back for mine.”

Nick chuckled at that and shook his head. “Athena.. You’re not paying me back. I didn’t even buy tickets, so don’t worry about it.” He picked up both her suitcases and carried them to his car’s trunk.

Athena followed him and looked at him in confusion. “Then how are we getting to Napa if you didn’t buy any airline tickets?”

Nick lifted them both in, moving his stuff over to make sure her’s fit in perfectly. “I rented a jet.” He shrugged nonchalantly.

“A jet?!” Athena shouted in disbelief.

—---

The jet itself was nice and roomy. Never in her life had Athena been in something so luxurious. She had flown first class before, but that was the extent of it. 

When they had pulled up and Nick handed over his keys, opening Athena’s door to help her out, she was blown away by the sight of the jet, its pilot, and crew waiting for them with big smiles.

As Nick shook the captain’s hand and introduced Athena to him, the pilot smiled warmly and said, “We are happy to have you aboard Mr. Bosa, and your girlfriend, Ms. Thermopoli.”

Athena blushed brightly at that and didn’t correct it, not wanting to make it awkard as Nick just grinned in response and thanked him.

As the flight attendant was getting them settled, Nick took a seat next to Athena and reclined back, looking at her with hooded eyes and a smile. “You know.. You’re going to have to be my seat buddy for this trip.”

“Oh?” Athena asked as she was adjusting her bow. “Why’s that?”

“I’m not a big fan of flying.” He saw her look of surprise at that. “I know it doesn’t make a lot of sense.. I mean, I do it regularly for my job, but I’m just not the best flier.”

“I understand.” She reached out and placed her hand comfortingly on top of his, giving it a gentle squeeze. “We all have things we fear and I won’t make fun of it, promise.” She smiled at him.

He smiled warmly at her, flipping the hand with hers over to lace his fingers through hers. He gently pulled her closer on the sofa and she obliged him, feeling her cheeks warm as they sat thigh to thigh, their hands still clasp together and resting on his thigh.

Nick twisted his body towards her, reaching with his other hand to tuck a curl behind her ears, his thumb brushing against her cheek lightly, causing a shiver to go down her spine.

He saw that and grinned at her. “Ticklish?”

“A bit.” She shyly admitted.

Just as Nick was about to say something, the flight attendant returned with a chilled bottle of wine Nick had asked for, and two glasses. “It’s going to be just another half hour, sir and then we’ll be heading for take off.”

She smiled over at Athena and said, “Your dress is absolutely gorgeous. It suits you really well too. Where did you get it?”

Athena perked up at that and answered eagerly, “I actually thrifted it from a place in North Miami Beach. And thank you! It was such a pretty blue color and it was only $5, so I had to get it.”

“It was a good purchase, you look lovely in it, miss.”

Athena thanked her again, and sipped the wine that Nick had just poured.

Nick was watching her, having just sipped his own glass. “You know… I didn’t know what I was expecting when I made that follow request months ago.”

“Oh?” Athena stared back. “What were you hoping for?”

“Well,” He scratched his neck nervously. “A chance with you. I hadn’t realized you were engaged right away, I just saw you tagged in a picture on Arty’s account..” He saw her stare in confusion, “It was when her and Joey did their stupid mini break up and she was baiting him to come out of hiding to talk to her. I was trying to help him figure out what club she was at.. And yeah, I saw a picture of you on her Instagram and got curious.”

Athena was mulling over his words when she said, “I was on the phone with Arty when I got your request to follow me. And I accepted it because I was curious too. Curious about you and curious about who your brother was to my sister.” She swallowed nervously before staring up at him, “I.. I liked the attention you showed me. I couldn’t admit it with Teddy..” She saw him frown at his name, a look of irritation flashed on his face before he schooled his expression again, “But I did like it.. And I didn’t discourage it because it felt good that someone was being nice to me and showing me attention… When I wasn’t getting it from the one person who should have shown it to me.” She looked down at her lap, suddenly feeling very vulnerable and uncomfortable with admitting that to herself.

Nick gently grabbed her glass, placing it next to his on the tray near him, and leaned in to kiss her cheek.

Athena turned slightly and pressed her lips against him, surprising Nick as he gasped in shock. She wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned into him, pressing deeper into the kiss as he opened his mouth to meet her tongue with his.

She wasn’t sure how long they remained like that, with him reclined back against the seat and her kneeling across him, her chest pressed to his as they made out.

Nick’s hands were pressed into her back and on her backside, the latter squeezing her flesh there firmly as she moaned into his mouth.

“Ehem.”

The two pulled away suddenly, as if they had been caught doing something inappropriate like two teenagers sneaking around.

The flight attendant was trying not to grin at the two of them as she said, “The captain said we are about to take off. Is there anything else I could get either of you beforehand?”

Both shook their heads in response. 

“Ok. I’ll be back soon with the safety demonstration in just a moment.” She smiled at them. Just as she was walking away, she turned back and said, “There is also a bedroom suite in the back if either or both of you need to lay down for a bit.”

Athena blushed at that as Nick just smirked in return and thanked her.

“That’s one way to enjoy a plane ride.” He teased, enjoying the flush of Athena’s cheeks as she was quietly pressing her hands to her cheeks in embarrassment. “Stop…” He groaned dramatically, “You are too cute when you do that.”

She pouted at him. “Now the flight attendant probably thinks I’m some floozy.”

Nick draped his arm around her, pulling her into him and pressing a kiss to her cheek. “Nah, she just thinks you’re my beautiful girlfriend who has a beautiful dress on.”

“I’m not your girlfriend though.” Athena whispered.

“You could be.” He whispered back with a smirk on his face.

Athena hmmed at that and pretended to think. “We’ll see.”

“I’m holding you to that.” Nick said, “Now let’s get this wine drunk so we can sleep through the trip. I got a lot of shit planned for us this weekend.”

—-----------

The plane ride went smoothly as Athena and Nick ended up using the back bedroom to sleep through most of it. 

Athena could add that to her list of things never done before: sleep in a bed with a handsome man on a private jet.

As they pulled up in the car rental to the hotel they were staying at in Napa, Athena felt her breath be taken away at the sight of the place. The winery/hotel was one of the most beautiful places she had ever seen. 

Her eyes scanned over the architecture of the building as Nick pulled up to the valet.

“Well, here is home until Tuesday.” He said as he shut the car off and got out, coming around to let Athena out.

As they made their way in and completed checking in at the front, Nick made sure their luggage would be delivered to their room and guided Athena upstairs to their suite.

In the elevator, she wrapped her arms around Nick’s waist and gave him a squeeze. “Thank you so much for this.. It’s probably the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.” She pulled away and wiped her eyes slightly, feeling a tad emotional at the gesture of that was this trip.

Nick smiled at her and wrapped his arms around her this time, pulling her into him and pressing a kiss to her cheek. “You’re welcome. Anything for you, Thena.”

She smiled up at him and he leaned down to press a kiss to her lips. They stayed like that for a few moments until they heard the ding of the elevator reaching their floor and stopping.

Pulling up, Nick reached for her hand and led her out of the elevator and down the hall to their room.

Sliding the keycard, the door opened and Nick swooped Athena up suddenly, making her squeal in surprise, as he carried her bridal style through the threshold and gently placed her down on the sofa in the living room area.

He went to shut the door and kick his shoes off before joining her on the sofa and pulling her onto his lap.

She giggled, pressing her face into his neck as he held her against him, shifting them to lay facing each other on the sofa.

“You have pretty eyes.” She whispered at him, her finger rubbing beneath his left eye, touching the very light dusting of freckles that could only be seen close up.

Nick smiled at her and touched her cheek as well, his finger lightly rubbing over the beauty mark she had under her right eye. “Yours are too. Actually, your entire face is gorgeous.” He whispered back.

They laid there, staring at each other dreamily as Athena felt her eyes begin to slightly droop. She tried to blink off the tiredness, something Nick noticed.

“Want to go take another nap? It’s only 11am. We can head out around 1pm to the vineyard.” 

Athena nodded and started to get up. Nick did as well.

They both headed for the bedroom, Athena kicking her shoes off and socks, and undoing her hair as she sat on the bed. Just as she turned to say something to Nick, she was caught off guard at the sight of him.

The moment she turned to look, he was pulling his t-shirt off. Her eyes took in his impressive physique as she bit her lip, her mind going to places she only dreamed of in private. 

Nick caught her looking and grinned at her knowingly, amused by her reaction. He wouldn’t lie - it was an ego booster to know she was attracted to him in such a way.

He got in bed, lifting the comforter and adjusting the pillows. He leaned back, still grinning at her, and said, “You should get in. The bed feels amazing.”

“Oh?” Athena squeaked out. Her face was reddening as she tried to tear her eyes away from his pectorals. “I- yeah.. Ok..”

She crawled in as well, her face still flushed hot. She regretted not wearing makeup today because even with an olive toned complexion, she was sure he could still see the blushing on her face.

Nick was watching her, his eyes slightly darkened as she moved to face him.

She stared shyly back at him. “What?”

“Nothing.. You’re just so beautiful.”

“Thank you.” She smiled back at him.

He turned to lay on his back and held his arm out. “Come here.”

“You’re awful cuddly, Mr. Bosa.” She teased him as she moved over to lay her head on his chest, her hand coming up to rest gently on his chest, her fingers brushing the chest hair he had grown out there.

“With you I am. How could I not be?” He said back to her, enjoying the feeling of her pressed against him so intimately.

Her hand was absent-mindedly drawing circles on his chest, causing him to shiver at the sensation. “Careful,” He warned. “You don’t want to start anything you can’t finish right now.” He said drowsily, his eyes closed.

“Who says I can’t finish it?” She asked him innocently.

Nick opened one eye and grinned at her. “I figured you’d want to be able to walk around and sight-see before we get dessert.”

Athena bit her lip at the images in her head. “Hmm.. I guess you’re right.. Although I do have quite the sweet tooth.”

“Me too.” Nick muttered, closing his eyes again with a smirk. “I especially love Greek desserts. I can’t wait to try this kind I brought with me..”

Athena’s face was flushing red again as she bit her lip and stared at her finger that was still drawing circles on his chest, “I have a feeling we aren’t talking about actual desserts right now..”

“No? Well we’ll have time for those later too.” He grabbed her hand suddenly and pressed a kiss to her palm. “Let’s nap. You’ll need it later.”

He wasn’t joking about that.

—-----------------------

After waking up from their nap, and finding their luggage in the living room area of the suite, Athena showered and changed into a white laced corset top and a silky, light-green skirt to match. She finished the outfit off with tan colored sandals and pinned her hair back into a partial french updo. Pleased with her look, she stepped out to find Nick already showered and dressed in the living room.

When she stepped out, he turned and stared at her for a few moments, taking in her outfit. “Wow.. you look beautiful.” He said to her with a grin.

She walked over to him shyly, her hand toying with a loose curl. “Thank you.. You look very handsome as well.” And he did. Nick had changed into some navy blue chinos and a short-sleeved button up. 

Reaching up to tuck her curl behind her ear, he smiled down at her. “Thanks. I can clean up well when I need to.” He teased her.

“I’m sure you look good in anything.” ‘Or nothing at all.’ Thought Athena to herself as her eyes glazed over his arms and up to his face.

There was tension there in that moment as they locked eyes. Athena could see Nick’s eyes darken and him clench his jaw slightly. She could see in his eyes that he was fighting the same temptation in that moment that she was. The temptation to jump the other, skip their plans for the day, and spend it in bed, just the two of them with no barriers between what they wanted from the other.

Yet, just as Nick was leaning in, his watch went off, the timer he had set to be out the door for their tour had interrupted them.

Nick swallowed thickly and placed his hand on her lower back instead. “Ready to go wine tasting?”

Athena bit her lip for a moment and nodded. “Can’t wait.” ‘Can’t wait to get back here later that is.’

The vineyard was stunning.. Just absolutely a vision that was a feast for one’s eyes. Athena and Nick had just finished a tour of where the wine was prepared and were now preparing to try some wine along with lunch as catered by the winery. 

Athena was a red wine person for sure, sipping away at a sangria made from grapes that were imported from Spain. She savored the taste as she lifted her glass to Nick’s lips, telling him, “Try this. It’s lovely.”

Nick locked eyes with her as he grabbed the glass gently from her and took a sip. Setting the glass back down, he licked his lips and stared at Athena for a moment.

“Well?” She asked him eagerly, feeling a bit exposed under his hungry gaze.

“Tastes wonderful. Subtle sweet and fruity flavor.. Reminds me of your lip gloss.”

“Oh?” She inhaled in surprise, not expecting the comparison. “Did you find a kind you like?” 

They had a few glasses that were in front of them with name cards, listing the information of each bottle it came from. The waiter had stepped away for a few minutes to check on their food, leaving Nick and Athena to begin tasting on their own.

“Yeah..” Nick looked for the card for the sangria and lifted it. “This one.”

They stare at each other for a moment. “Did you want to buy a bottle for later?” She asks him nervously, feeling the heat building in her lower body, her face flushing once more as she couldn’t help but picture the two of them later on with a bottle of wine in the huge bathtub within their suite. Her cheeks were burning from the thoughts as well as the effects of the wine.

“Yeah. We can enjoy it later on when we get back to the hotel.” He turned to look for the waiter who was returning with their food. “We still have the spa to go to and then some swimming before dinner.” He told her absentmindedly as he thought about their plans later in the evening. 

“Hello! Sorry for the wait.” The waiter interrupted Nick’s thoughts as he started to serve the food.

Thanking the waiter, who then cleared the wine glasses they were done tasting from, Nick placed an order for the bottle of Spanish sangria Athena liked.

Athena watched him thoughtfully, not realizing that she was staring outright. Nick dug into his food, looking up and catching her eye.

“What?” He asked through a mouthful of food, an amused glint in his eye.

“Nothing.. Just thinking.” She blushed and looked down at her own food.

They ate their meal with small conversation here and there, the two just enjoying each other’s company, the quietness of the outdoor balcony they were seated at for their meal, and the food.

Athena stared out at the vineyard in front of them. She couldn’t help but wish they could stay like this forever. It was so serene.

But she knew that they’d have to return to their daily lives in four days, regardless of what she fantasized about and wanted.

The thought of that made her sad for some reason. She couldn’t pinpoint why. 

—-----------------------

The rest of their day was wonderful. Athena had never felt so relaxed after swimming with Nick outside for a while and then having a spa treatment for herself as he took part in separate therapeutic sessions (she was not going to take part in anything with cryotherapy) that focused on active recovery as he prepared for the start of training camp in a few weeks.

They both ended up back at the hotel where they spent time getting ready for their dinner reservations at the French Laundry restaurant in Napa. Athena knew this was a higher scale restaurant and was thankful Nick shared the itinerary for their trip beforehand. She was still beyond surprise at how romantic he was underneath his rugged appearance. He very much was a soft teddy bear at his core.. And she felt blessed that she could see that side of him when he appeared to not show it that often to others outside his immediate circle.

She had changed into a black slip dress, pairing it with diamond earrings, a tennis bracelet, and a diamond necklace. Her makeup was subtle, with the only bold color coming from the red lipstick she applied. Wearing her hair down fully, she worked on her hair, trying to tame down her curly hair. 

Growing up, she was picked on for her hair.. Often because it was frizzy and she preferred to wear it up a lot and not have her mom touch it. Athena had inherited s-curls from her dad’s side and from a young age her mom worked diligently to keep it straightened, often fawning over the straight hair that Artemis inherited from her.

Shaking those negative thoughts out of her head, she reached down to fasten her strappy heels before heading out of the bathroom.

Nick had worn a short sleeved black button up and black slacks with dress shoes. He turned around at hearing her enter the room. His eyes widened and he stared at her in stunned silence at seeing her dolled up. 

“Athena.. You look beautiful.” He said, his eyes still transfixed on her as she shyly walked over to him, her arms wrapped around her waist. 

“Thank you.” She smiled up at him, her dimples showing.

Nick leaned down and gently placed a kiss on her lips. Lingering there for a few moments before pulling back. “Fuck… I wish we didn’t have these reservations.. But we need to eat to keep up our energy.” He murmured. 

“Energy?” She asked, giving her best doe eyes at him, knowing fully well what he was referring to.

“You know..” He smirked back at her. He bit his lip for a moment, scanning over her body before cursing to himself and turning towards the door. “Let’s head out. The sooner we do, the sooner we can get back here for dessert.”

Athena couldn’t wait for dessert.. She knew that for certain.

—------------

The doors to the elevator had just closed when Athena had pressed herself against Nick, her lips making contact with his neck as she leaned on her tiptoes in her heels. His hand had made its way down to her backside, gripping her ass in his hands as he leaned back and allowed her to place a series of open mouth kisses across his neck. He groaned as she nipped his skin, likely leaving a hickey as she moved further down, pulling his collar down with her hand as she did so.

Thankfully their elevator dinged at their floor, both of them separating just enough to stumble out of the elevator and down the hall towards their suite. 

Nick got the door open and quickly pushed his way inside, leading Athena by the hand. The door shut behind as he tossed his wallet and the key card onto the counter, bending down and scooping Athena up as he held her against the wall, her legs coming to wrap around him.

Nick pushed his hands up underneath her dress that was bunching up around his waist. His hand yanked at her panties hard enough to rip them off her.

Athena gasped against his mouth, pulling back to look at the now ruined panties on the floor beneath them. They were flimsy, but new.. And she almost mourned at the sight of them because they were one of the few pair that were sexy but comfortable.

“Sorry.” Nic apologized, not sounding really sorry at all. “I’ll buy you a new pair.. Had to get that out of the way.”

Athena stared back at him, still panting from their make out. “Nick..” She said slowly.

“Yes?” He answered, his voice a deeper octave.

“Please.. Fuck me.” She pleaded with him.

Nick didn’t need to be asked twice. It was as if some carnal part of his brain took over.

It was a blur as they ended up in the bedroom, close strewn everywhere as they worked to remove barriers from each other. 

Athena cried out wantonly as Nick had her pinned against the bed, his lips sucking on her right nipple, his right arm keeping him propped up over her as his left hand was occupied down below. He was fingering her roughly, being sure to bury his fingers just deep enough so his palm rubbed up against her clit. His fingers would make a scissoring motion in her walls, taking her breath away at the pure ecstatic sensations blooming from her core.

She could feel tears pricking her eyes as she finally opened them to look at Nick, her breath hitching as she realized his eyes must have been glued to her face the whole time, taking in her expressions and adjusting his ministrations based on how she was reacting.

He released her nipple, leaning over to suckle the other before lifting his head and pressing his lips to Athena’s.

She moaned as his tongue met her’s, his fingers picking up speed, him curling the two inside her in a come hither motion.. Making her cry out as he seemed to hit a bundle of nerves that sent her spiraling in a mess of sensations.

Nick leaned back and started whispering encouragement to her. “Yeah.. look at you.. So hungry for my fingers.. So hungry for me.. You like when I fuck you? Huh, Thena?” He teased her, clearly enjoying her reaction to his ministrations.

She nodded at him, her words escaping her as she felt the tension in her building. 

“You are so pretty, taking my fingers so good. I can’t wait to put my cock in you. I bet you’re so tight.. You’re just squeezing my fingers right now.. I wanna feel your pussy around my cock as I fuck you..” He kept eye contact with her as he said it. “Let me see that pretty pussy cum for me… Can you do that for me, baby? Cum for me?”

Athena whimpered and nodded her head, her legs opening wider as her hips lifted instinctively. “I want it so bad..”

“Go ahead.” He pressed a kiss to her lips. “Let me see that pretty face.”

A few more thrusts of his fingers later and Athena was crying out as she cummed on his fingers, her lower body arching off the bed as Nick thrusted his fingers rough and fast into her, wanting her to feel the peak of pleasure as she climaxed. 

Her lower body slumped back down on the bed as she stared up at him through hooded eyes.

Nick gently pulled his fingers out, keeping eye contact with her as he sucked on his fingers, cleaning her cum from them.

He held his hand out to her, gently pressing the tips of his fingers to her lips.

She opened them and sucked on his fingers, moaning as she stared back at him.

Nick moaned at the doe eyes she was giving him. She was a succubus - he was sure of that. So beautiful with a soft, innocent look to her. Yet, he could see underneath it that she was yearning for sex just like he was. He could feel the connection the first day they met face-to-face a few weeks ago at a cafe in Fort Lauderdale. 

It was weird - and he couldn’t describe it, but it felt so natural. Being here with her, spending time with her, and having sex with her. He had never felt this intimate connection so strongly before.

Sure he had girlfriends he took on dates, fucked, and spent time with.. But it all ended the same and started the same. There was really just a physical, sexual aspect and nothing more. Making it easy at times to break up and move on.

Yet, with Athena he wanted more. He wasn’t sure what it was about her that made him react in such an innate, carnal manner, but all he could think about leading up to this trip was her.

He was certain her and her sister were witches or something. Because he was surely under her spell.. And he wasn’t certain he wanted to be anywhere else ever again.

—----------------

Athena was staring up into Nick’s eyes as he continued to deliver hard and long thrusts into her. Her legs were bent at the knees and pushed back almost to her shoulders with Nick’s grip holding them in place.

She glanced down towards where they were connected and moaned out at the sight of his cock pushing in and out from her pussy.

Nick smirked down at her and said, “you’re so fucking tight and wet, baby. You take it so fucking well.” He thrusted particularly harder at the last part.

Athena sobbed at that, her hand reaching out to grab the pillow next to her as she arched her back upwards.

Nick suddenly pulled out of her and gently released her legs. He sat back in his hunches, his cock still hard and glistening from Athena’s juices. “Fuck..” he moaned at the sight of Athena spread out, rosy cheeked and skin glistening in the dimmed lights of the hotel room. “I want you to ride me..” he crawled up beside her, leaning down to press a deep kiss to her lips, his hand cupping her chin and tilting her towards him as he slipped his tongue into her mouth.

He pulled back and said. “Wanna ride this dick, Athena?”

She bit her lip and nodded up to him.

“Tell me.” He commanded.

“I wanna ride your dick, baby.” She whispered to him, her voice hoarse from the screaming she had done earlier.

“Good.” He smirked at her, sitting down and adjusting to get comfortable. He stroked his cock and gestured for her to move over to him. “Come ride it.”

She crawled over to him, gently mounting his lap as he helped her line his cock up at her entrance. She inhaled, tensing slightly at first as she took him inch by inch.

Nick massaged her lower back, telling her, “Relax.. Baby.. just relax.”

Exhaling, she did so, wincing as she felt herself bottom out on his lap. Her ass was resting on his thighs as he reached to grab hold of her waist, careful not to hold too tightly.

Nick moaned out loudly as he felt her tight walls enveloping him again. “Fuck.. holy fuck.. How are you so tight?”

Athena panted as she squeezed tightly around him before shifting to rest on her knees, preparing to move. “I think it’s just your size.” She giggled, her arms coming to rest around his neck as she leaned in and pressed her forehead to his.

Nick smirked and said, “I hope it’s to your liking.”

“Absolutely.” She said back as she started to rock her hips back and forth before pouncing on his cock.

Nick helped her set the speed, the two of the panting. His hand reached behind her and slapped her ass roughly, causing her to squeal and bounce on him again. He laughed and did it again, this time to the other cheek.

Athena moaned at the sensation, her head tilting back as she felt the familiar sensation building again. The wine she drank earlier was making her feel ethereal.. And she knew that even though he had a higher tolerance than her, Nick was feeling it too.

It wasn’t long before she felt the tell-tale sign of her climax building again. She knew it was going to be intense as her legs started to shake with each bounce she made on his cock.

Nick’s hands had moved to cupping her ass, his hands squeezing and palming her cheeks as he panted slightly, feeling his own orgasm building.

Just as she came down once more, Nick had reached in front of her with his right hand and rubbed her clit just right, triggering her orgasm and making her cry out loudly, her head slumping against his chest as she felt the convulsions move through her.

She could see stars in that moment as she squeezed her eyes shut and rode out the sensations coursing through her.

Nick followed shortly after, moaning loudly and swearing “Fuck!” as he pumped into her, enjoying the sensation of her velvety walls milking him.

He leaned his head back as Athena slumped against him, the two of them soaked in sweat from their fucking.

He lifted his arm and rubbed it down Athena’s back, gently massaging her lower back as he felt her panting softly against his neck.

Nick stared at the half-drunk wine bottle on the end table across the room. After he fingered her, they drank half the bottle of the Spanish sangria, the wine furthering their desire for one another. He was for sure going to buy another bottle or two of it.

Nick, although slightly drunk and tired, knew they had forgotten something important.. But he couldn’t remember just what.. 

He shifted with Athena on top of him, careful in laying her down on the bed. She mumbled sleepily and cuddled into the pillow as Nick reached to shut the lights off in the room. Crawling under the blankets with her, and pulling her flushed against his back, he wrapped his arm around her and started to doze off.

Whatever it was, it would have to wait until later.

[just-sp-in-inginthevoid]

Takeomi, Self-Esteem and Denial (and more)

@raizelswitch, thank you for waiting!

TL;DR : I want a BD spin-off and I want it from Takeomi’s POV even though he’d be such an unreliable narrator (and like that we could also have a Akashi siblings spin-off, two birds, one stone). Takeomi has a lot of issues and making him raise children and naming him vice captain was a bad idea since it only made things worse. He had developed both an inferiority and superiority complex to cope. And we were robbed of any interaction between him and Inui, the other famous ‘can’t let go of Black Dragon even after x years’ character.

Who wants to read about 17,000 words about Takeomi (I didn’t expect to write this much, what the heck)? Clearly not Tumblr because I spent way too much time having to reorder this post, it mixed it all up everytime ! It also refused to post it for hours

The translations of Wakasa’s and Benkei’s ‘a day in his life’ as well as Takeomi’s failure story come from the Twitter user RanHaruchiyo

I feel like I made a few mistakes so there : English is not my native language, I apologize if some sentences don’t make sense. Sorry for any type of typos as well.

I referred to the past (beside the final timeline) as ‘canon-timeline’ several times because I had no clue how to name it. It’s not the futures, it’s not the original or final timeline, it’s… it’s the past until the final timeline comes in.

When you reach the top – the only way is down. (and up and down…)

Let’s get started with something very quick – Takeomi was created to be the exact opposite of Shinichiro. And when you’re the exact opposite of a character who’s perfectly good, loved by everyone (other characters and fans alike), then the writer uses you to be bad. Not necessarily evil - Takeomi isn’t evil - but ‘not good’.

And Wakui doesn’t shy away from that. I’m keeping the analysis of the kanji of the Akashi and Sano siblings’ names for the end, so I’ll just talk about the ‘shi’ of ‘Akashi’ here, to show what I mean.

司 (Akashi) means ‘administrator, official, a governor whom the emperor chose to carry on the imperial policies in provinces’. It fits Takeomi’s role pretty much, right ? He had a high rank in Black Dragon, but Shinichiro was above and that’s when it starts to be very interesting. 司 upside down gives 后. And it means ‘monarch, king, emperor, queen, empress’ – nice coincidence, isn’t it ?. It’s literally the same kanji upside down. Takeomi is Shinichiro upside down. Is that why he’s the rain bringer while Shinichiro, always being seen in a positive light, would be linked to the sun ? I already thought of Takeomi as a ‘teru teru bozu’ since they’re supposed to bring rain when hung upside down and it’s not stupid to think of Shinichiro, oh so perfect Shinichiro, as a ‘sun bringer’ – after all, like Mikey, he took over Japan, did he not ?

Plus, the sun is their most famous goddess (Amaterasu)’s symbol, Japan’s symbol, and by such the emperor’s symbol.

And when you’re that. When you’re the mirror of such a perfect character, how can you not be made but only of flaws ? You’re made to be bad in everything he is good – and the opposite isn’t guaranteed to be true. What if making you good in things he’s bad in makes you good ? No, no, you’re supposed to be bad. Because he’s good, and you’re his polar opposite. He’s bad in excusable things. You’re bad in barely forgivable things. It’s not important for him to be a horrible fighter, even in a story centered around gang fights. It’s unforgivable for you to not know how to raise your siblings, in a story built on siblings' relationships.

And Shinichiro is great at raising Mikey and Emma, while Takeomi isn’t that much of a fighter. We see him fight a bit when he goes with Brahman to confront South about Draken’s death, but it’s not big important fights, Benkei and Wakasa, and later Senju, are the ones fighting. And Benkei and Wakasa were Black Dragon 1st generation’s main fighting power, as the guard and special attack unit captains.

(Heck, Shinichiro is listed n°1 best in bikes riders, Takeomi is n°3 worst - yet another thing he's either bad or average at. (Wakasa is n°3 best, we dont know where Benkei lies. Mikey is 2nd best, Takemichi and Senju are respectively 1st and 2nd worse))

Shinichiro is good, even when he kills. Takeomi is only ever bad or less-bad. Perhaps Wakui initially planned scenes where he was ‘good’, but they never came to be, so instead we’re stuck with a character who has a potential for a redemption arc and who never got it.

(Look at this ! He became self aware! And finally stopped living in denial !)

(We never see him again after this btw. He never gets to talk to Sanzu.)

If there’s one thing Takeomi is good at, it’s strategy.

He is feared, he is called « God of War », he is named vice-captain…

By other people. By other delinquents. By Shinichiro.

He doesn’t think he’s the reason all of that happens. He isn’t those things, he receives them (use of passive voice). By such, if people don’t give him, then he’s left with nothing. No matter if he is good at something, if people aren’t there to tell him, then he doesn’t think he is. Takeomi thinks of his worth, his validity as a person by how others perceive him - they praise him ? He must be great ! They ignore him ? How pathetic has he become.

When do people say that ? When he’s Black Dragon Vice-Captain. When is he Black Dragon vice-captain ? When Shinichiro is on top. That’s why he panics in chapter 230 when Shinichiro tells him about disbanding the gang. If the gang gets disbanded, what does he have left ? If Shinichiro tells him to stop following him around (chapter 230: “I was always by Shin’s side”) what is he supposed to do ? He is but “an ordinary kid. Whether it be in sports, or studies, [...] just average. [...] a normal child, not special at all” (same chapter) whose childhood friend “had a mysterious charm that attracted people around him. Even with that charm, Shin never resorted to violence.[...]he was just very earnest and kind” (same chapter). Without Black Dragon he’s nothing. Without Shinichiro he’s nothing. Because he never learnt to let go of Shinichiro‘s hand, nor did he wish to. But Shinichiro just.. let go one day. We know how Shinichiro is. If he was aware of how much he is needed by Takeomi, he would have done things differently. And while he shouldn’t be responsible for Takeomi’s well-being, he is the reason whether Takeomi’s self-esteem is stable (or a bit too much over the top) or not. Takeomi made him responsible for it, and Shinichiro surely would’ve helped if he figured it out, (because Takeomi is a stranger to himself and wouldn’t have ever asked for help (he doesn’t know he needs help after all)), but Shinichiro didn’t. The same way Mikey didn’t notice why Baji acted the way he did during Valhalla arc until it was too late. It’s not because they’re childhood friends that they read each other like an open book.

Shinichiro, while he never intended to and we can’t blame him for this either, is the reason Takeomi turned out like he did. Takeomi followed him everywhere, he wouldn’t have entered delinquency if Shinichiro didn’t. Takeomi tried so hard to climb to Shinichiro’s level and kept comparing himself to him and it got worse when he was appointed the role of vice-president. His ego skyrocketed. And even if Shinichiro had noticed it, would he have figured out how to change that ? For sure, if he knew how to help he’d have helped – then again, would Takeomi accept this help ? He’s a professional when it comes to denial, he pushes everyone away. And denial is what he does best. From denying he would be nothing without the other Black Dragon founding members and hiding behind his God of War persona, to denying his involvement in Senju and Sanzu’s life. Even if Shinichiro, Wakasa and Benkei did try to help, you can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped, who refuses to believe there’s something wrong, and by doing so who refuses to talk about it. It’s all made to protect himself from the truth. Because the truth will hurt him, facing it will make him realize he’s not special and that will shatter his self-esteem. It will make him feel painful emotions he can’t deal with. So he runs away from it, and thus, dives deeper into misery. If you refuse to see the problem, then it will grow, and Takeomi’s problems, his mistakes, grow a lot. The world changes but he doesn’t, he keeps the same behaviors, and soon they turn against him. His fame turns into debts. Debts he can’t pay anymore, but he refuses to admit it. Because he would have been able to pay, if Black Dragon had remained. Takeomi likes to live in luxury (his dream is to be a multimillionaire), so he’d keep on denying the fact he can’t afford it anymore just to carry on living this way.

Maybe the reason him and Wakasa & Benkei aren’t close isn’t that they see him as ‘Shinichiro’s childhood friend we’re obligated to endure/tolerate even though he’s insufferable’ (when the BD founding members interact, Wakasa and Benkei always tease, laugh at Shinichiro, chapter 230, Benkei “Look at all your battle scars !” Shinichiro, “Quit it !” Wakasa, “A loser in both fights and love !” Shinichiro “Hey man, that's none of your business”; chapter 269: Benkei “You sure are dumb, Shinichiro !” Wakasa, “Haha. Well, that's shin-chan for ya.”) they’re never shown as friendly toward Takeomi) but more that, even if they did try, Takeomi, unconsciously, never let them know who he really was underneath it all. To be fair, Takeomi lied to himself so strongly he wasn’t aware he wasn’t this façade he had created. I’m not sure if Wakasa and Benkei succeeded in seeing through his lies, Takeomi himself surely didn’t. Shinichiro was left but whether it be the original timeline or not, he didn’t succeed to help Takeomi. Takeomi compares himself to others (him being an ordinary kid vs Shinichiro not being one), is sensitive to criticism and compliments alike (while he didn’t seem hurt when Kakucho uno-reversed him by asking him if he had forgotten about Shinichiro after Takeomi had asked him if he had forgotten about Izana, he did react, unlike Kakucho who remained unfazed; “Drunk in the praises of my name, I became arrogant”), seeks attention and validation, makes things about himself (“[...]He talks about the Brahman Senju created as if he created it. [...] I remember he used to brag about Shinichiro's achievements as if he himself had done them[...]”, Benkei’s ‘a day in his life’) and has troubles admitting his faults (even if he eventually apologizes in chapter 230 to Senju, he is fighting back tears while doing so). Those are all things inferiority and superiority complexes share (beside the low self-esteem). And while there are signs we can’t be 100% sure he has, reading about Takeomi echoes to those two complexes. First, inferiority complex. Feeling insecure, incomplete or unworthy → “not special at all”; “I was broke and powerless“; ”at the lowest of low. But they accepted me as I was”. Withdrawal → “I got news of Shin's death. But I was too busy in struggling for money.”, that ‘too busy with money’ (in good (“treated as a VIP [...] never got short on money” and in bad “my debts piling up”) seems like the perfect excuse to avoid your friends and family. All or nothing thinking, things are either good or bad → he’s either at the top of Japan and everything is doing great or he’s not and nothing’s working in his life. Insecurity in relationships → Benkei and Wakasa are his disliked/feared people because "they look down on me" (3rd guide book) (there is no proof of that but I’ll dig into that later). Feeling good when doing better than others → only felt at ease when he was the God of War. Finding fault in others, demeaning others as a way to transfer their feelings → will go back to it way later, but his relationship with Sanzu is basically that. Shutting down because of shame, guilt, embarrassment or an inward sense of defeat → once again, what he did after he started to be indebted.

For superiority complex there’s : hiding feelings of mediocrity and underlying or persistent low self-esteem or feelings of inferiority → hiding his “powerless”, “ordinary” and all behind his mask of second in command of Black Dragon and Brahman. High valuation of self-worth, a self-image of supremacy or authority, overarching belief that they are better than others → “the first generation Black Dragon once ruled the nation - with me as the vice captain. I was feared, since my decisions determined how any conflict would end. I was called the « God of War »” . Feelings of entitlements and boastful claims that aren’t backed up by reality → he brags about Senju and Shinichiro’s achievements, they aren’t his own (even though he must have some). Which goes with: need to be in control → he’s the one who’s in charge of making Brahman gain money (and he’s the one who decided of it, Senju is against his ways), Brahman listens to him when he says they’re attacking Rokuhara Tendai and not to Senju who tell them to stop, and is convinced Senju is only where she is thanks to him, Wakasa and Benkei being around and dealing with everything (chapter 229, Takeomi: “Senju got herself included in the ‘three deities’ only through first gen Black Dragon’s support. Senju can't take this fight alone !”).

There are also signs which I can’t find quotes or panels to say Takeomi has them but, knowing the character, it wouldn’t be surprising. These include : feelings of hostility, frustration, nervousness, or aggression (he does express those but given the context it's justifiable; he's impulsively decide to go against Rokuhara Tendai even though Senju tells him no because they aren't ready, Benkei says "It's no use, Takeomi has lost his cool". There's also his nicotine addiction which does not help). Highly competitive, perfectionist paired with an avoidance for any kind of competition where efforts might be compared with others’ ; don’t do something if there are risks one would fail (he dislikes efforts (3rd guide book), so that may mean he only does things when he’s sure of his own capacities and refuse to leave his comfort zone, he doesn’t participate/try if he’s not sure of succeeding). And : unwillingness to listen to others (if BD founding members tried to take his head out of the sand, it failed). Overcompensation to specific elements of life (perhaps linked to his childhood but we have no information about it). Mood swings, often made worse by contradiction from another person (→ him seemingly aloof, becoming mad very quickly at Sanzu when he or Senju do something wrong ? His whole reaction to Draken’s death; “I'm gonna destroy Rokuhara Tandai right now.[...] Assemble everyone in Brahman for an emergency meeting !!”, followed by South’s comment in chapter 225: “It's so rare to see Akashi getting all rowdy like this.” and Senju’s trying to calm him down (only making it worse). Takeomi’s interaction with Kakucho about Izana and Shinichiro in chapter 212 too maybe). Gets offended if there’s no positive feedback.

I will like to add that no official list of signs exist or if it does, I didn’t find it. But knowing how both of these complexes work, it was interesting to talk about it, in my opinion.

(By the way, Takeomi was listed number 1 worst at ‘who is needy when dating ?’ (whereas Sanzu and Wakasa were 1st and 2nd best). Except that in Takeomi’s case the reason he’s not needy is because he's straight-up avoidant which isn't better. As opposed to Senju and Draken (2nd and 3rd worst) who seem non-needy in a healthy way.)

Takeomi wants to stand at the top, Shinichiro knows how to go up there, so he just has to tag along, easy-peasy. But like for a jungle gym, you have to get down one day. Did Shinichiro want to become Japan's number 1 ? I’m not that sure. It may have been a goal, but not the main one. What he liked most was the journey, not the destination, if it was then he wouldn’t have disbanded Black Dragon. But Takeomi wants to go on top of the jungle gym. Takeomi wants to be Japan number 1. Forever. Takeomi wants to learn how you get up there and how to stay/keep standing still.

That’s one of the most tragic point with Takeomi in my opinion. He was the brain of Black Dragon, he was the brain of Braham (it may have been an excuse but Senju recruited him for his guidance, his wisdom), and he was, supposedly as Mikey’s advisor, the brain of Bonten. He knows how to get on top of Japan. He knows how to become influential, how to make money (Brahman’s B-1 fighting club), how to recruit people and make them stay, he knows which decision to take to assure victory or defeat.

He’s smart, insanely. And he. doesn’t. see. it. If he did, he could have managed to live without the gang.

For Takeomi, it’s not that he becomes number 1, it’s that there’s a number 1 by his side and he knows how to follow them (his special skill is ‘taking advantage of others’ (3rd guide book)). He is aware he was the lead actor as to why victory or defeat were but – Takeomi isn’t a fighter. Wakasa and Benkei are. Shinichiro sucked at it but he was still insanely strong.

Takeomi doesn’t fight and that’s not his role. He likely knows how to pull out punches and other fight moves but as a ‘God Of War’ he’s mainly a strategist. He takes decisions, Shin agrees or not (and Shin is the one who has the last say), Wakasa and Benkei, and the rest of the gang, apply. (chapter 224, Benkei answering “yes, sir” to one of Takeomi’s command (even though Senju is clearly against it))

However, he’s not the one who brought them together. All of what he has. It’s thanks to Shinichiro. Wouldn’t be number 1 without him. Wouldn’t be friends with Wakasa and Benkei without him. Takeomi lives on what Shinichiro gave him. Him, an average, good-for-nothing kid. And when it’s time to say farewell to all of that – he doesn’t.

Shinichiro has his own shop. Wakasa and Benkei have their own gym.

Takeomi stays as if he was still on top. As if he wasn’t already falling, as if the impact on the ground wouldn’t damage him. As if Shinichiro, who decided climbing the jungle gym wasn’t fun anymore, didn’t stop stabilizing him.

He lives in denial. And it works at the beginning. People still think of them as number 1 so it’s not too hard. But then they realize they aren’t. But Takeomi is an average kid. In everything. He’s only good at what Shinichiro designed him as. And he didn’t think he'd be good at it. He isn’t good at anything else. He can’t do anything else. So it goes on.

The debts pill up.

Shinichiro dies.

And ? And repeat. Without the debts, this time.

Senju, joyous, cheerful, strong-willed Senju, asks him to join her gang. As her second in command. Even though he is “broke and powerless”. “At the lowest of low” (chapter 230). Even though Wakasa and Benkei are right there.

(Shinichiro asked him to be his vice captain. Even though Takeomi was average, good at nothing but following his childhood friend around. Even though Shinichiro had become friends with Wakasa and Benkei who were in this world since way longer.)

And so Brahman is created.

Their prestige comes back. They remember mannerisms days after days, they remember how you do it. Brahmam grows. They have hundreds of members, they make a lot of money with deals and underground fights. Whereas Wakasa and Benkei moved on (or, way more than Takeomi did), Takeomi didn’t and it shows even in their Brahman uniforms. If you look closely, they don’t have the same patterns on their sleeves – Wakasa and Benkei both got flowers, although different from the other’s (same thing for Senju) but Takeomi has a dragon. (Average Brahman members have the same thing they have on the back of their uniforms)

Draken dies. Draken dies. He shouts it – It’s not a childish brawl (chapter 224). I find it hard to believe that during Black Dragon 1st Gen, they never lost anyone, but Draken’s death snaps him back to reality. It isn’t like it was with Shinichiro. There’s no fun. It’s war. Standing at the top isn’t like standing on a jungle gym. Draken is dead and so is Shinichiro. Why isn’t he ? (chapter 225, Takeomi: “Souuuuuuuth !! Why did you kill Draken !? He wasn't even a formal member of Brahman ! If you wanted to kill someone it should've been me !”)

Either Draken dies, or Senju does.

For what else would have Takeomi joined Bonten ? Actually, let me change that question ; where is and what does Senju do in Bad Toman and Manila timelines ?

Because Mikey goes down a dark path in all the timelines so, did she try to stop him ? If yes, is she dead ? The three deities battle might or not have happened (South wouldn’t have the same members if that’s the case – Tenjiku never came to be in Bad Toman and Izana is alive in Manila). And… And if that’s the case or not – why are Wakasa, Benkei and Takeomi nowhere to be seen ?

Wakasa and Benkei work in a way that opposes Takeomi. Not only with how they dealt with Black Dragon disbandment but how they dealt with Senju’s death. No matter how it happened, Takeomi joins Mikey after his sister’s death (Bonten), Wakasa and Benkei join Kanto Manji when Senju doesn’t (nowhere to be seen in Bonten).

Difference being, if Senju dies, Wakasa can’t witness Mikey’s dark impulses and can’t talk to him about it. And even if he witnessed it, if Senju is dead, would Wakasa care ? Wakasa must know there’s nothing against the dark impulses so why join Kanto Manji ? They love Senju, their princess, do they want to keep her safe ? Surely. Why take this option then?

It's never stated. So it's interpretation/theory time.

Wakasa would choose Shinichiro over Mikey. In chapter 270, he says "Honeslty speaking, I'm glad that Manjiro has passed. I was worried that you'd be first to die [...] Right now, you're just rotting away", now, Wakasa from the original timeline and from canon-timeline aren't the same. Original timeline Wakasa had the time to accept Shinichiro had lost his brother (and Mikey could perhaps regain consciousness one day, but the more day passes, the more the chances lower), but he couldn't see his friend rot away. His previously bright and charismatic friend was being devoured by sleep deprivation, helplessness and so much more. Hence, if Mikey dying would free Shinichiro from his suffering (although it would also add to it, he wouldn't have to work himself to the bone to take care of Mikey, and would finally have time to process all of what happened to him) then Wakasa is okay with it. Shinichiro is important to him, more than Mikey could ever be.

Wakasa, is the only person Shinichiro talked to about the original timeline. Out of the two people knowing about it, Wakasa is the one Shinichiro went to to tell him about it (Sanzu is the other and he came to Shinichiro asking about it). We don't know if Shinichiro planned to tell more people, and if yes, Wakasa was on the top of his list. Thus, this means Wakasa had heard Shinichiro telling him he killed a man and then himself. Because Mikey died. So that Mikey won't die. And he probably was murdered because of it later on too, because Shinichiro told him the homeless man's last words – because Shinichiro told him everything with every details.

So, when Wakasa finally sees Mikey again, sees the level of destruction he causes, sees that he kills like it's nothing, like he's enjoying it, this boy his friend killed for to keep alive... Well, Wakasa, dragging Benkei along, joined Kanto Manji to keep Mikey alive — because that's what Shinichiro sacrificed himself for, so, so many times. He can only stay near Mikey and try to not have him killed when they're in a world where being murdered is common. Mikey is strong, but he won't ever survive a bullet shot in the wrong place.

For Takeomi though, when he joins Bonten, his sister is dead. After his best friend. He failed the two people who meant the most to him and who appointed him as their second in command because they trusted him. He let them die. It’s not a child game anymore. South signed his death warrant.

And Takeomi hasn’t seen Mikey or Sanzu in years. (They’re the only ones left, he can’t leave them alone. He can’t stay alone.)

That’s the first theory. Second is, he crashes, he and Mikey end up meeting again, he gives him the role as his advisor. Rinse, repeat. The circle continues ; Bonten is at the top of Japan. Mikey is at the top of Japan – and that, even without Kisaki. 

Even without Kisaki.

Is Takeomi on the same level as Kisaki ? I don’t know. Kisaki is the moon to Mikey’s sun. But what was Takeomi to Shinichiro ? Perhaps his rain. And I'll keep going with the ‘perhaps’, because we’re never shown what Takeomi is to Shinichiro, beside a friend. Every meaningful interaction they have is from Takeomi’s POV. In Shinichiro’s chapters, Takeomi is briefly mentioned once when Sanzu gets out of the juvenile center, then when Shinichiro time leaps, he is too focused on Mikey to give (me) us any useful interaction/thought about Takeomi. There’s only one case, “Takeomi…” in chapter 273 but without that ? The start of chapter 269 is shallow. It gives us information on Shinichiro’s relationship with Mikey and Takeomi’s own relationship with his siblings (“I'm like his father figure at this point. Its best from him to learn from his peers” /"What kind of parent would let their kids learn from gang rides ?”) and also a quick information on Black Dragon founding members but that information is basically ‘they’re good friends :)’.

Anyway, Shinichiro nicknamed Takeomi ‘Rain Bringer’. So what does rain symbolize in Japan and does it somewhat fit Takeomi ? Rain is strongly linked to death and rebirth (as water usually is in Japan), to becoming something, someone else. This makes a nice little link with his siblings as Senju’s flowers are sakura (and so is her image color, pink sakura) which also symbolize the cycle of death and rebirth, the fleeting nature of life, how short if is, but also renewal and optimism, and Sanzu got his name from Sanzu no kawa, the three-crossing river, who is a river souls have to cross to get to the afterlife and/or to resurrect.

Takeomi’s other nickname, which wasn’t given by Shinichiro, is God of war. Japan has two gods of war, either Hachiman from shintoism, or Bishamonten from buddhism (since it’s Japan we’re talking about, those two got mixed up a bit but). Hachiman is a god of war and agriculture and was said to determine a samurai’s fate in battle (chapter 230 : “[...] my decisions determined how any conflict would end”). Bishamonten is a god of war and warriors, a punisher of evildoers and the ruler of rain. Bishamonten also carries a chatra (a kind of umbrella that symbolizes kingship, sovereignty).

This, while it gives more tracks to analyze Takeomi, doesn’t answer the question ‘What was Takeomi to Shinichiro’. So, if the story refuses to give us the answer, we have to find some parallels with other characters and see if they fit.

Shinichiro’s...

...Baji

That’s right ! Baji and Takeomi share the same role. For this topic, Sanzu (and Senju) is the anomaly between him, Baji and Mikey.(and although we could say Sanzu is Baji’s parallel, he’s mostly Kakucho’s.)

Let’s start with why Wakui decided to depict them that way.

For Mikey and Baji, it was mostly there to show how long they’ve known each other. Mikey had said they were childhood friends but that doesn’t give us a time indication as to when they met. Then, there is the ‘Baji is behind’ aspect. It isn’t a problem between them, that Baji never wins against Mikey, no matter the years. Baji is just after Mikey and can’t reach the top yet.

For Shinichiro and Takeomi, it’s the same. ‘They’ve known each other for how long?’ ‘Probably since then’. Takeomi is behind Shinichiro who is standing at the top. Takeomi wants to do so too, and Shinichiro helps him to. Takeomi can’t stand here unless Shinichiro holds him still.

Shinichiro doesn’t enjoy being Japan’s number 1 - standing at the top. He became a delinquent to form relationships, to have fun, to deal with his father’s death and his mother’s stay in the hospital. He wasn’t against becoming the strongest but it wasn’t his goal (chapter 142, Shinichiro, in a quick Inui’s flashback: “Is winning really that important ?”). After all, if there’s nobody above you, the only people left are below, and Shinichiro says it, it’s only bullying and that’s meaningless (chapter 230, “Now that there's no one better than us, at this point it's just gonna be bullying the people weaker than us, wouldn't it ?”)

However, the childhood friend dying changes. For Mikey and Baji, the one climbing dies ; for Shinichiro and Takeomi, the one at the top does. How can we interpret this ? We already did for Takeomi – that means the one climbing falls. But for the one already on top ? The person who (tried to) followed him there died on the way. He’s still on top, but now he’s alone. Mikey is never alone, but after Shinichiro, Baji’s death is one of the last indispensable nail on his coffin. A nail aggravating his isolation and loneliness.

Personality wise, Baji and Takeomi are awfully different. Takeomi is awfully different to all characters – he is one of the most flawed and most fans don’t find him any redeeming quality.

Baji does share one of Takeomi’s characteristics, and that’s what (ironically) led to Shinichiro’s death. As Kazutora says in chapter 44 while stealing the bike: “You might complain but you always go along with whatever I'm doing”, Baji follows people. He can do well on his own (Valhalla), but if it wasn’t for his stubbornness in pursuing Mikey around (chapter 39, Mikey: “We lived in the same neighborhood. It’s not like we got along that well. He was always picking fights with me”), they wouldn’t have become childhood friends. They are also younger than their childhood friends (Sanzu and Shinichiro are the oldest).

Baji is Shinichiro in one aspect though: he is the one to have created Toman and to have assigned every founding member their role in the gang. (Baji does it in a flashback of chapter 63, Shinichiro gave Takeomi his position as vice-captain so it won’t surprise me if he gave Wakasa and Benkei their). They both also challenge people stronger than them. (Shinichiro on a daily basis “He'd challenge guys way stronger than him to fights”, Baji with Mikey “He was always picking fights with me. And I handed him his ass every time.”).

If there are parallels between Shinichiro and Baji – are there parallels between Takeomi and Mikey ? The answer is yes. They both don’t know what to do after Shinichiro’s death (and Mikey is even more lost after Baji’s), so much that if you push them in the wrong path, they end up as the number 1 criminal organization of their country (Kisaki for Mikey (Bad toman, Manila) helped to speedrun the process — as we see with Bonten, Mikey’s circle in Bonten (Sanzu “There they are ! The dark impulses ! I've been waiting for this” Haruchiyo) helped too. And the one thing to do to get Takeomi back in his prime is to restore his self-confidence (Bonten, and what he was close to do with Brahman)), they both cope with their emotions the same way as well, ‘I’ll keep all my emotions right here. And then one day, I’ll die’ as one may say. They hide between smiles or blank faces. Little things matter as well, so.. chapter 123, Mikey “I wanna stand out” - they both do (even if Mikey is about 4 in this chapter).

...Kisaki

the fact takeomi is both baji and kisaki is hilarious pls. Those two hated each other so much. Well i wont be surprised if Wakui made it official that Takeomi hates himself

Yeah you read that right. Takeomi is Shinichiro’s Kisaki to the same extent he is Shinichiro’s Baji. Like with Baji, he fills Kisaki’s role while dealing with it differently – they don’t have the same personality so it’s not that surprising.

They’re both the gang’s ‘brain’. Whereas Takeomi was given the position, Kisaki approached Mikey with this exact idea in mind. Kisaki wanted to make Tenjiku Toman (chapter 126, “I'm going to make my own Toman”), and Takeomi was about to transform Brahman into (a much darker) Black Dragon (Chapter 219, Senju: “Brahman’s gotten bigger.. and Takeomi has changed. Now, instead of making brahman ‘stronger’ he thinks that making it ‘bigger’ is more important”  → all the more people to praise him). Both had the same goal too (to become number 1), and end up being criticized for it because of their way to attain it by Mikey (“in order to make Toman bigger I've ignored your underhanded methods until now. But that ends here [...] Your arbitrary decisions will screw up my dream”) and Senju ("I get that not all the jobs we take will be clean. However, thinking about dirtying Brahman for trash like that pisses me off”) when those two asked them are the one who asked them to guide them (chapter 265, Mikey: “there has been ‘something’ dark inside my heart. Sometimes that ‘something’ expands and drives me to destroy absolutely everything. Kisaki… I want you to stay by my side with that part of me. I want you to guide me, Kisaki” (and worse, when Kisaki asked him if he’s sure, even if Kisaki doesn’t guide him the way he wants, Mikey answered “yeah, I don’t care.” But then, it was before Takemichi waltzed in his life); chapter 230, Senju: “I want someone who I can trust ! Someone who can give some guidance to the team ! Will you fill that role, big bro ?”). They had different reasons, for sure, Kisaki wanted Hinata’s love, Takeomi wanted (to keep) that idolizing love other people had for him, but those different reasons have the same roots.

They never grew up from their child-mindset.

Kisaki kept that childish logic of ‘Hinata loves Takemichi. Takemichi wants to be Japan's number 1 delinquent. Hinata loves Japan's number 1 delinquent. If I’m Japan's number 1 delinquent, Hinata will love me.’ (and he wanted Hinata’s love because she was the only one interacting with him and being nice to him, she said “He’s a good kid” when everyone else doesn’t, even back in elementary school where he is described as “creepy”) and Takeomi kept that childhood wish of being important, needed, validated.

Now, they turned out differently because of a very essential point :

Chapter 182, first chapter of Kisaki’s flashback : “When I was in elementary school, they called me a child prodigy.”

Chapter 230, Takeomi’s chapter : “Whether it be in sports, or studies, I was just average. I was but a normal child, not special at all.”

Kisaki was made aware from an early age that he was smart. He is as arrogant as much his intelligence allows him to be (sure, it’s insufferable, but he is as smart as he says). He is well-assured of his capacities and is the one to make his life decisions, he is very independent from Mikey or anyone else. Kisaki has an actual self-esteem. He doesn’t under or overestimate himself. He knows what he does, he knows he is the one doing so. Takeomi is the opposite. He’s too arrogant, doesn’t know in what he is smart, but the others say so, so he must be, he makes his decisions while looking at Shinichiro – he got there thanks to Shinichiro. And Kisaki got there thanks to Takemichi, although in another way. Kisaki also followed Takemichi around. By stalking him, but still. And unlike Takeomi, Kisaki is very conscious of it when he lies, it is but another strategy to manipulate people.

Kisaki is Takeomi if people had noticed and talked about his capacities in his childhood. Takeomi is what Kisaki could’ve been if people never praised him, if he never finished number one at any national mock exam and if he became childhood friends with Takemichi (instead of stalking him).

Both of them corrupted Toman and Brahman (and Black Dragon if Shinichiro hadn’t been Shinichiro). “Brahman is closer to a group of adult gangsters than they are a motorcycle gang. Some nasty rumors follow them, too.” (chapter 215, Inui); “Money is power. How valuable do you think your ‘strength’ is !?” (chapter 229, Takeomi); but are also the reason why they became huge organizations. They are the reasons why Brahman (almost) and Toman fell into criminal organizations (although Toman would’ve anyway).

They also both first got into a gang when they were 13. (Black Dragon was created the 22nd February 1995 – Takeomi was born the 10th march 1981 (the year after Shinichiro’s own birth btw, Shinichiro who is the oldest Black Dragon founding member), so he was about to turn 14 BUT HE WASN'T, and in 2005 Kisaki is 13 since he was born the 20th january 1992 (two years younger than Mikey, one year younger than Takemichi))

...Draken.

Shinichiro and Mikey both have their “This is the breeze of a new era !”(chapter 230)/”I’m gonna seize this world” (chapter 223) speech that only Takeomi/Draken could hear ; and they’re both vice-captain/second in command.

When Black Dragon gets officially disbanded (their final garthering), Wakasa and Benkei shed a tear or two, Shinichiro being the crybaby he is, has a lot of tears running down his face, and Takeomi… too. Takeomi is the only one with his eyes close. He grins his teeth. He can’t accept this reality, can’t look at it. Even if Shinichiro talked about it with him beforehand. And… it’s the same with Draken. Not that Mikey informed him before saying Toman was over (and they didn’t have a second generation to lend the name too, as opposed to Black Dragon), but with how he reacted. On paper, he said he agreed with it (even after his “What ? What’re you goin’ on all of a sudden ?” in chapter 189 which is the same as Takeomi’s “Disband !? But why !? I mean, we just became Japan's number one !” in chapter 230, and Mikey also disbanded Toman after becoming Japan’s number 1), that since it was Mikey’s choice, he had “no objection to the leader's decision” (chapter 189), but in reality, not only do we learn it’s not true when they dug up the time capsule (chapter 198, Draken reading his letter : “I’m at a crossroads in my life right now. Toman disbanded. […] I actually regret it. Toman is everything to me. Im sure everyone in toman felt that way ? I’m worried… I cried”), but he also joins Brahman. There was nothing prior to that revelation pointing at it. In Bonten he has his shop, he says “I’m retired” and “I left everything i had back in Tokyo Manji” to South (chapter 211) in his letter he wrote “So, I'm leaving all of my regrets in here” and that’s what teenager Draken tried to do. But he joined Brahman instead. And we learn why after, when he says in a flashback to Mitsuya (chapter 238) : “Have you grown accustomed to living life without Toman ? Because I can't seem to move on from it. That’s why I think i’m gonna go back to the life of deliquent. I’ll continue following Mikey [...]”. Draken couldn’t leave Toman, his whole life behind. Then why did he in Bonten ? Because Senju died. Not only must it have affected him, but it affected Takeomi, Wakasa and Benkei. And, yes, we can say Senju died in Bonten regardless of the fact it’s never said. Why ? Bonten is a memorial for Izana, its symbol, its members’ tattoo come from Izana’s earrings and the (天) ten of Bonten 梵天 from Tenjiku 天竺, the (梵) bon of Bonten 梵天 comes from Brahman 梵. The executives, advisor, second and third in command, are either former Tenjiku member or Senju’s brother (or both for Sanzu but again, can we really say he was a Tenjiku member when it’s clear he was acting as a spy on Mikey’s unaware behalf..) - and its leader had a deep relationship with those two as well. There’s no need for Senju to have the same role as Izana in Bonten if she’s not dead. So, Senju’s death is the answer as to why Draken utterly left Toman (and Mikey) behind in Bonten timeline (he loves Mikey very much but he can't lose any more loved ones). But Draken’s wish to get back to Mikey until then, his refusal to abandon Toman, was what led him and Takeomi to understand each other. That’s what led to Takeomi recruiting Draken (because he must have been the one to come up with the idea, like he is the one to have thought about recruiting Takemichi). That’s what leads Takeomi to get this angry at his death. Not only is Takeomi is partially responsible for it, Draken is essential to bring back Mikey, and Takeomi is not. And so, “If you wanted to kill someone it should've been me !” (chapter 225). And also why he becomes even more angry when Mikey arrives (“Fuck off, Kanto gang ! You guys abandoned Draken !”). Takeomi takes his role as Senju’s second in command very seriously, she asked him to guide the team and he accepted, he swore to give his all for them (chapter 230). He is the one telling her to keep cool and not being driven by her emotions (chapter 218), which is ironic because he’s the one to act before thinking after Draken’s death whereas Senju tries to calm him down (and fails).

Kanto being “a three-way state of equilibrium between these three teams and has entered the three deities era” (Yamagishi, chapter 208) was not an innocent choice when it is also revealed in chapter 226 by Senju that “Benkei and Waka. Before the first generation of Black Dragon happened, these two divided the Kanto region. Kanto used to be divided into two parts”. South takes the role of Benkei, and Senju, who created Brahman for the only purpose of stopping Mikey the same way Kodo Rengo was formed to stop Ragnarok’s expansion, takes the role of Wakasa. This is also backed up by their fighting style and body type. Mikey takes Shinichiro’s role, but whereas Shinichiro ‘defeated’ Wakasa and Benkei and became their friends and leader which lead to them ruling over the region, Mikey crushed South/Rokuhara Tandai and made Senju disband Brahman, for the same result (Takemichi could’ve taken on Shinichiro’s role but the power of friendship can’t do everything). And Draken is in Takeomi’s role. Not Sanzu. (because Sanzu doesn’t care about Toman while Draken just wants it back.). Furthermore, I like the fact South, in the final timeline, “is a heavyweight champion of foreign martial arts. When he visits Japan, he hangs out at the Gojo gym” because not only does South finally have friends (like Senju, he is friendless in canon-timeline) but because Benkei’s dream is “to produce a MMA champion from Gojo gym”, which while not being exactly the same thing is still close enough for me.

A difference between them worth mentioning is that while Draken is the oldest of Toman founding members, Takeomi is the youngest of Black Dragon founding members.

(+ Inui, Kokonoi:

The other character introduced as refusing the end of Black Dragon is Inui. He's a character who is developed alongside Kokonoi who can't accept Akane's death.

But whereas Takeomi seemingly doesn't do anything by himself to get out of his vicious circle and debts, Inui actively tries to keep Black Dragon alive. He even takes Shinichiro’s shop as his hideout (with Kokonoi), although it has been abandoned. Nobody else came to keep that place alive – it reminds them of a too painful reality. And it could've with Inui too, but Inui has only good memories of this place (chapter 143, Inui: “All those senpai who’d stop by were so dazzling and awesome. [...] I heard so many stories in this bike shop from our senpai. They all had so much fun talking about their old leader [...] Even as an adult, he could still laugh about the dumb stuff he did years ago together with his friends.”). Not to say the others don’t; but Inui is able to see pass the pain of this happiness unable to come back.

Inui is the first out of the three to let it go. He finds Takemichi and realizes that.. maybe he could live without Black Dragon. It takes a bit but Bonten Inui has let it go completely, unlike Kokonoi and Takeomi, both going deeper and deeper into criminality ; both still running away from reality, refusing to look back and see what they loved isn't there anymore.

Inui heals in Bonten. He doesn't in Bad Toman, where he's with Hakkai who became BD 11th leader. He doesn't in Manila, where Izana who was the 8th BD leader and the first leader Inui worked under comes back. Always running after BD shadow. Manila Inui met Takemichi, but Manila Inui wasn't separated from Kokonoi, not for years, not for more than a decade, since Tenjiku merged with Toman. They probably didn't have their 'Akane is dead, I'm Seishu!' talk, and if they did, it clearly didn't change anything.

We don't know how Inuis family life is. We know his parents couldn't pay for his sister's surgery and she ended up dying. We know he had had to witness his best friend lose himself in the prospect to make money. We know somewhen, he met Shinichiro. Spent time with him at his shop. Perhaps to stay away from home ? Home who burnt him? Home who took away his sister ? Meeting Shinichiro did a lot to him accepting his sister's death, surely. A bit of positivity in his life. But nobody was there for him when Shinichiro himself died. When Izana disappeared nobody knew where and the Haitani Brothers left Black Dragon when it became to hard to deal with, leading it to fade away (chapter 105, Kokonoi: “They ended up in a tough spot when the Haitani brothers of Roppongi came to power… So they ditched the gang, and disappeared.”).

Inui learnt about it after getting out of juvie. He went to juvie for Black Dragon. For Izana. This can't be the end of it. So he makes Taiju the 10th leader. He's not loyal to him because he's Taiju, he's loyal to him because it's the Black Dragon leader (chapter 143, Inui: “That good old Black Dragon I used to know was no more. I panicked when Black Dragon died for a while. That’s when I sought help from Shiba Taiju.”). But the Christmas Showdown happens, and Inui witnesses the force of nature that is Takemichi Hanagaki. And he's like Shinichiro was.

He leaves Black Dragon behind when he puts on Toman uniform for the first time. Black Dragon won't ever leave him, but he can let it go and cherish the memories he has. He didn't get to be in Black Dragon when he wanted to (chapter 143, Inui: “I’ve always admired such a team. That’s why I joined Blakc Dragon. But by the time I joined Black Dragon it was the eightth generation. It was shit.”) and that changed him (as being in a gang changed Takeomi) (chapter 143: ”During the eighth and ninth generations.. our gang did extortion, robbed people, sold drugs, all sorts of heinoius stuff. There was no trace left of the gang’s original intentions. And before i knew it, the gang’s evil had an influence on me. I landed myself in juvie.”), but he can maybe experience a similar thing with Takemichi, or maybe it'll be completely different. It's okay, he has turned the page. Now, he has to bring back Kokonoi and make him turn the page as well. Except Inui had a slow and nice 'turn the page', while Kokonoi won't.

Kokonoi needs more time, Kokonoi can't let Akane go just yet, even if Inui yells at him to stop acting as if he was seeing his sister instead of himself. Inui practically slaps him up. He has failed during Tenjiku, but this failure planted a seed in Kokonoi's mind which finally bloomed during the battle with Kanto Manji. It's a more abrupt realization than Inui got, but it doesn't hurt him. Akane tells him to let go, that she's glad he did all of that for her but that he doesn't need to continue – she's dead. Seishu is not. And even if that's meaningless, even if he knows he's, they're, going to lose, he goes help Inui against Wakasa and Benkei.

Takeomi's realization of having done something wrong falls upon him all at once. A part of it. His realization concerning Brahman, about Senju and Sanzu is there ("I've failed Brahman principles"(chapter 230)/"But me going crazy and Haruchiyo going astray[...]"(chapter 241) and it hurt him. Acknowledging his mistakes to himself and to others, to Senju, made him cry.)

But where is his realization about Black Dragon and Shinichiro ?)

But not Shinichiro’s Takemichi.

Takeomi isn’t Shinichiro’s Takemichi because for starters, Takemichi is Shinichiro as it is constantly repeated throughout the story.

Takemichi changed Mikey’s life (if it wasn’t for him, he would’ve kept listening to Kisaki, kept thinking he only needed darkness, he would’ve killed Kazutora (chapter 265)). Takeomi didn’t change much Shinichiro’s. Not the same way Takemichi did at least. Mikey, like Takeomi, needed someone to guide him, to follow around, whether this person was Takemichi or Kisaki depends entirely on the timeline’s events. Shinichiro could guide himself, he didn’t need somebody to show him the way. So what ? Why does it matter? It matters because all the friendships in this story have an impact on the characters it concerns. Whether it be the Twin Dragons, Izana and Kakucho, Inui and Kokonoi, Mikey is changed by Pah (going to jail), Kazutora (Shinichiro’s death), Baji (him siding with Kazutora and his own death), Draken (“Draken is Mikey’s heart. He compensates for what he’s lacking”) (not Mitsuya though. Which is very sad. I want a concrete example of how Mìtsuya impacted Mikey's life!!)… And the Black Dragon are out of this rule. Especially Shinichiro. Takeomi, Wakasa and Benkei all changed because of him (in good for Wakasa & Benkei, in what could’ve been good but ended up bad for Takeomi) but the other way around isn’t shown to be true. Wakasa & Benkei became friends, really good friends since they own a gym together in several timelines, and Takeomi got something to fill his lack of self-esteem which then got taken away from him without him having learnt how to cope with it in the meantime.

And Wakasa & Benkei aren’t supposed to have a gym in canon-timeline. Wakasa is a gang leader in the original timeline – supposedly he only changed vocation because Shinichiro told him about the original timeline and he decided not to go down that path. But then, when did Shinichiro had the time, during his time in the past, to tell Wakasa about his time leap ? He barely stayed one day. So did Wakasa, in the original timeline, came back to the illegal world so he can produce/obtain money and help Shinichiro out ? We don’t know what Benkei does in the original timeline, but I’d find it hard to believe he’s not with Wakasa. As for Takeomi, his situation is most likely the same, he’s in debt (which would explain that brief “Takeomi…” from chapter 272 from Shinichiro before he has to focus on the date, and very much alive Mikey). Or, if we want to look at another option, since Shinichiro got into “shaddy stuffs” (as he says in chapter 270), they could’ve followed and got back into delinquency. If they did it fast enough, Takeomi probably didn't get to the point of having debts. If you add the “Join my gang, Shin. With you we'd be the top gang in the world” of Wakasa (same chapter)  to any of this option, and the lack of negative response from Shinichiro you end up with one terrifying timeline where Shinichiro could have become, actually, a bad guy (or kill himself anyway).

What did all three of them do to make Shinichiro grow, positively or not ? Nothing (concrete that is, his admired/respected people are ‘’the Black Dragon First Generation Members‘’). Shinichiro’s entire personality, and that’s one of the only if not the only character, is centered exclusively around his family, mostly but not only, Mikey. He is changed by his father’s death and his mother’s hospitalization and starts to be a delinquent, he is changed by Mikey’s accident, by Emma running away, by his grandfather dying, by Mikey’s death and is so broken he is ready to believe in time travel, maybe was he also changed by Izana’s reaction when he discovered they weren’t blood-related. Only Wakasa is here in his flashback. No Benkei, only a mention of Takeomi. That’s not right. They’re his friends, why aren’t they here ? Why do we have so little information ?

Shinichiro stays the same until Mikey has his accident. He isn’t shaped by anybody else, not even his childhood friend whom he has known for more than a decade.

Shinichiro didn’t need guidance like Mikey did, but he didn’t need to stagnate either.

– which beg the question : Why did Wakui decide to put the exact same kanji, pronounced the exact same way in both Takeomi (武臣) and Takemichi (武道)’s name ? As a writer, making this decision means something (most of the time), alas, i didn’t find what. (Takemichi like Takeomi has self-esteem problems at the beginning of the story because he got beaten up as an middle school student by Kiyomasa but other than that..)

What I did find was Wakasa, Benkei and Takeomi pages in the third guide book. There’s still not much about Shinichiro (he is listed as all three’s admired/respected person), but there’s a bit more about their relationship with Takeomi. First, the one thing that actually surprised me : Wakasa and Benkei are listed as Takeomi’s disliked/feared people. Then, Wakui was kind to explain since it’s followed by “(They look down on me )”. Now, to see if it’s true or not (if they do think that, or if it’s just Takeomi (who must be such an unreliable narrator)) we have to take a look at Wakasa and Benkei’s own page.

Takeomi is only mentioned once for Wakasa, in his ‘a day in his life’ :

“I had a one-week holiday, so I went on a quick trolling trip to Okinawa. I wanted to enjoy fishing alone, but Takeomi and Benkei came along. The aim was yellowfin tuna. Takeomi got tired of not being able to catch anything after 3 hours on the boat and said he wanted to go home, while Benkei was seasick and exhausted. I knew I shouldn't have brought them along.”

We learnt that Takeomi isn’t that patient (to be fair, fishing isn’t something he likes to do, unlike Wakasa) but not that much is said about how Wakasa really thinks about him and him alone. He is irritated by both of his friends, who ruined his holiday, equally. You can’t say if he looks down on Takeomi or not.

For Benkei, Takeomi is also mentioned once and it’s in his ‘a day in his life’ as well :

“The gym is closed today. Takeomi persistently invited me out for a drink. I usually don't go, but we went to an izakaya together. His drinking is long. At first its fun, but as we get deeper into it, he starts to brag. He talks about the Brahman Senju created as if he created it. He has always been like that. I remember he used to brag about Shinichiro's achievements as if he himself had done them. Shinichiro liked him, including such a bad part of him.”

It gives more than Wakasa’s did. First, Takeomi, although he dislikes/fears them, still tags along with both of them when he can. Second, not that much of a news, Takeomi brags and takes on Senju’s achievements, the same way he took on Shinichiro’s. Third, Shinichiro was aware of it and didn’t stop him ?

While we can say Benkei is probably irritated by it, like for Wakasa we can’t say he looks down on Takeomi.

It pains me that there’s not much interaction between them. You can say Wakasa and Benkei are friends – but do they consider Takeomi a friend ? I don’t think he’s still labeled ‘Shinichiro’s friend’ in their mind, but – especially with Takeomi’s fall – they aren’t close, have they ever been. They don’t have that kind of relationship like Toman’s founding members have for example. Perhaps they did once.

Takeomi’s page, in my opinion at least, is the one that gives the more information on the character it‘s about. He likes Akechi Mitsuhide because he has the same birthday as him (sure why not – Akechi Mitsuhide, to make it very short, a general in the Heian period who attempted to become Shogun, and whose reign as Shogun lasted thirteen days), he dislikes making efforts (makes sense, he makes others’ achievements his own, which also leads to:), his special talent is taking advantages of people, and his dream is to be a multimillionaire (he is also ranked number 1 best to ‘Who has a way with words ?’).

Except confirming what I was already thinking, it still doesn’t offer much (but i’m so glad it has been explecitely written). But his failure story, that’s, well, another story.

And all of that offers a great transition, but let me change the topic first –

Family - the first thing you learn to run away from

(You were probably waiting for it from the start, sorry it took so long for me to talk about it !)

Takeomi’s failure story goes like this :

“I was their father figure. My father was busy because we are a motherless family. I was strict with Haruchiyo because he’s a man. He cut my face with a knife one day and left the house. He’s a hell of a fucking brother. I vowed that one day I would let Senju punish him.”

Sanzu gave him the scar.

Worse, looking at the timeline, Takeomi doesn’t have the scar when Black Dragon is founded (in February 1995 Sanzu would have been 4 so, not that surprising) but he gained it along the way, before Black Dragon disbandment (in late spring, early summer 1999, so Sanzu was either 8 or 9 (Takeomi was 18 – they have a 9 years gap)). That’s… young. What could have pushed Sanzu to do this ? Did Takeomi really do such a poor job raising him, Sanzu decided that attacking him was the only way out or something like that ? Sanzu, who says to Senju, “I wish I knew how to talk back to big bro like how Mikey and Baji do…” (chapter 241), cut his brother’s face with a knife before the age of nine? (he was nine when he said that, so perhaps he did stand up for himself before but then he gradually stopped (or all at once, it depends on how Takeomi reacted to being cut i suppose.)).

This leads to a question : did any outsider of their family know about it ? Sanzu probably wasn’t running around yelling about what he did, but did Takeomi complain (to Shinichiro) or did he keep his mouth shut about how his scar came to be. Both ? Complained about how hard it is to raise Sanzu (who ran away after what he did) while saying his new scar is from a fight he has gotten into ?(of course he didn’t get his scar from a 4-9 years old. Who do you take him for, he wouldn't let anyone, let alone a child, scar him like that.) Since we know Sanzu doesn’t go home when he’s in Toman (chapter 206, Muto : “What's with that look in your eye ? You don't have anywhere you belong ?”), it may not be an unusual thing for him to run away. (Which begs the question: what does his grandmother and father think about it ? Are they even aware of it ?)

Looking again at the timeline, what did Mikey and Takemichi do during the final reset ? They came back in October 1998 (Sanzu 8, Takeomi 17), yet Takeomi has his scar during the wedding. So either Sanzu cut his face before (and be 8 years old at most), or Mikey and Takemichi failed to prevent it.

this baby cut his brother’s face.

Talking about scars… We never got to see how Takeomi reacted when Sanzu got his. Did he blame him (he thought Sanzu was the one who broke the toy plane before Senju confesses she is in chapter 241) ? Did he just not do anything and left (oh sweet guilt) ? Did he decide to stay away from Mikey a bit ? Did he go to the hospital ?

For both Sanzu cutting Takeomi’s face and the toy plane incident, I pity Senju for having to witness it and feel guilty for not doing anything, but also because she knows sometimes she should be punished and not Sanzu. Her and Hakkai should get along well (once he stops freezing everytime girls talk to him).

But above all, I pity all of them for witnessing how the Sano family works. How, even though they also have absent parents, they’re healthy. How Mikey talks back to Shinichiro, how Emma loves her brother without feeling unwanted or lonely, how Shinichiro knows how to raise his siblings even with his family life, his parents' condition. And my heart ached the first time I read chapter 273 and Sanzu called Shinichiro ‘Shin-nii’ – thing Mikey never did. They addressed Takeomi as ‘Take-nii’ in their childhood, but they stopped. (Sanzu calls Shinichiro ‘Shinichiro-kun’ in the original timeline, which makes you wonder why, but I think he did since he was young and stopped because, for one, Shinichiro is too busy with his study and taking care of Mikey, and two, Sanzu went to juvie.) And Sanzu goes directly to Shinichiro after getting his memories back. He shares his confusion with Shinichiro, even if what he says seems unbelievable (even for himself) because he trusts him and knows he can share his worries with him. And Shinichiro answered to this 13 years old needing reassurance by telling him he killed a man.

I’d give a lot to see how the Akashi father is. I’d give a lot to see how Takeomi was raised. Because with Shinichiro it’s easy. Mama Sano and Papa Sano, for the little we’ve seen of them, seemed like good, stable people. They must have raised Shinichiro great until they couldn’t anymore. We don’t know when Mikey’s mother got to the hospital, but his father died when he was 3, so Shinichiro at least spent 13 years of his life with (guidance from) his father. Sure, it would’ve been better if it be longer, but it’s already more than.. Taiju (which, with some calculation, was 8 when his mother died). But we don’t know for the Akashi. We only know that Sanzu and Senju don’t call themselves Akashi. That Senju says “ We’re the mysterious siblings !” which is funny but makes me think about ‘let’s not talk about whatever’s going on in our family/at home’ which is not funny. Think of it, if the Akashi parents were the same as the Sano, they wouldn’t have turned out that way. It’s not fair to compare families or even people but to be fair they’re characters so they’re meant to be compared. And maybe the Sano siblings would have turned out like the Akashi siblings if their dad survived and their mom still died, who knows.

Takeomi didn’t take Senju and Sanzu to gang meetings, or anything gang-related whereas Shinichiro did. There could be two reasons (which can both be true at the same time) : 1, gang stuffs are dangerous, who would bring kids along, seriously, Shinichiro ? (chapter 269, Takeomi “are you stupid ? what kind of parents would let their kids learn from gang rides ?” after Shinichiro said “I'm like his father figure at this point. It's best from him to learn from his peers”) 2, it was the only thing he had that wasn’t family/home, where he could be himself and not have to care about his siblings (and be completely crushed under his responsibilities and doing a poor job because of it--). The fact he didn’t isn’t that important, Sanzu didn’t want to be part of a gang to start with (chapter 277 : “Nah! I don’t wanna be a delinquent!”), he only joined Toman after having his memories from the original timeline back and talking with Shinichiro about it (and Shinichiro dying). But Black Dragon, like for Shinichiro, was Takeomi’s life and by not bringing Sanzu and Senju in it, he didn’t interact with them much, he let them out of his life. Mikey and Emma “followed him [Shinichiro] everywhere” (chapter 109, Mikey), Takeomi needed his me-time, far away from his siblings. He couldn’t, unlike Shinichiro, put on the ‘perfect big brother’ role/façade.

Since he left his house often, Sanzu was left in charge (chapter 241, Takeomi “[...] you have to set a good example for her”; chapter 249, Sanzu (to Senju) “Did you forget who raised you [...]?”). If Takeomi had to take care on their father's role, it’s easy to understand that he delegated his big brother role to Sanzu. This was clearly not a good move, but Takeomi back then didn’t understand how strict he was with Sanzu, nor how unfair it was that he would blamed him for things Senju had done (following the rule of ‘you’re the older, you should have taught her better’) (perhaps Takeomi was so strict with Sanzu because he lashed out all of his self-anger/hatred on him; there's also the fact he may have recognized himself (his childhood self at least) in Sanzu – shitty move, but as a professional of denial, Takeomi might not have even been aware of it). But Takeomi wasn’t meant to be their father figure in the first place, and he could have failed his big brother role as well even if their life had been different, but he shouldn’t have had to endorse the responsibility of raising his siblings, had he been given the choice or not. It’s also somewhat ironic, that Takeomi did take on their father’s role the same way their father did – he left home for work and everything to the oldest child who stayed. Just like Shinichiro took on his father’s role. Not only because Shinichiro spent time with his siblings, which their father seems like he would have done, but also because, like his father, he gifts Mikey a toy, and tragedy soon follows (his father’s death in the car accident, Sanzu’s scars or Mikey’s accident). He was also a crybaby – although his father never cried in public (chapter 263, Mikey: “My father also cried easily ?”, his mom: “I wonder if he ever cried in public? That man was hopeless”). Mikey looked up to him, like he looks up to his father. I honestly think Mikey, who was also a crybaby as a child (chapter 263, Mikey’s mom: “[...] you too… used to be a crybaby when you were younger. All you did was cry and wail.”), started to stop crying (in public and in private alike) after his father’s death. Sure, he was very young when it happened, but children lack life experience not intelligence, sometimes they’re very capable of reading the room, and Mikey, who probably didn’t understand what was happening, knew that weeping wouldn’t help his already crying brother and mother. Mikey saw his father as this very strong, capable man who protected the family and decided to take on that role by being ‘strong’, by not crying and by beating people up (chapter 263, Mikey: “I am not going to cry. That's why, mom, I'm going to protect you, so come back home”; “I met that big guy from east elementary’s third grade. And I beat him up !”, his mom: “You're so strong, Manjiro. Just like your father.”). He has one memory of his father, where he hands him a superhero figurine – and what are fathers if not the superhero of their young children ? 

Sanzu was a better big brother than Takeomi was. Sanzu, like Takeomi in the past, doesn’t want Senju to be in a gang and much less a gang leader (chapter 216, Senju : “Haruchiyo doesn't like the fact I’m the head of Brahman. He doesn't like that I'm the strongest and that Takeomi endorses me.”). “Because of my mistakes, Takeomi got mad at Haruchiyo even so Haruchiyo was always nice to me” (Senju, chapter 241) ; he could have. He could have let out the anger he had on Senju since he couldn’t talk back to Takeomi. He didn’t, because Sanzu was a kind child, but also because seeing how Takeomi favored Senju (in his actions, this does not mean he loved her more) if he had learnt Sanzu got angry at her or even made her cry… Sanzu was already aware of how his brother acted when he got angry.

I refuse to believe “The curse Shinichiro created by killing the time leaper, that is what my ‘dark impulses’ are. It affected everyone around him” (chapter 274) as the reason behind Sanzu and Mikey’s behavior. Simply because, if it did, then why was Wakasa, Benkei, Emma, heck even Sano grandpa, not affected by it ? And why was Kazutora ? The only way I accept it is with ‘it affected Sanzu because he was Shinichiro’s trigger, so they shared the power and by such, Sanzu had to carry a bit of the curse’ (im not going to talk about mikey’s case here but i also came up with a more complex reason as to why he was affected, that is not just ‘he was close to him’). However, we don’t know what the curse does. The homeless man only said ‘’curse you’’ (chapter 271), any explanation from a character who isn’t the homeless man can’t be taken as the perfect truth. Anyway, all of that to say that behind Sanzu (and Mikey’s) actions, there was a bit of genuinity. The curse pushed them to act, but a part of them wanted to act, the curse made them unable to stop (and think of alternative solutions), worse, the curse made them like it. (okay, it’s theory time heck it. the curse feeds on tragedy, the more tragedy, the more it grows, the more it grows, the more hungry it gets, the more it wants tragedy, the more it triggers tragedy. And by feeding on tragedy i mean all the negative feelings that go hand-in-hand with. Sadness, despair, helplessness, rage, regrets, guilt… It clings to someone who already has a tragic life (Mikey, Sanzu, … Kazutora,…) and it worsens it. End of theory time.) ANYWAY. All of that to say that, this ?

Was something Sanzu would (without the curse) regret, but did anyway because he couldn’t stop it (because of the curse) because a part of him wanted to (not necessarily, hit Senju with a pipe, but get a pay-back from what he had had to go through as a child. Who knows what he would have done to Takeomi if Wakui decided to not drop our ‘God of War’ by the road before the last fight of the story). And he says things her ‘always nice to her’ brother wouldn’t have said (especially) to her such as “fighting all flamboyantly like that.. you buzzing disgusts the hell out of me. You disgusting fly !” (chapter 248)

Sanzu knows Senju isn't responsible for Mikey's curse, but he learnt about it when he was 13; not before (i'm not saying that's why he hit her, that’s not my best transition). Who knows, maybe somewhere in his mind he did blame Senju before memories of the original timeline flew back to him and he realized whether the toy had broken or not, Mikey would've turned up like that either way. This also begs the question : what did Sanzu think about the accident, before Shinichiro admitted what really happened on that day, before he got his memories from the original timeline back ? What did he think about staying friends with the one who scarred him for life ? Did he really wholeheartedly agree to stay friends for life with Mikey to Shinichiro?

Speaking of the original timeline, Takeomi is said to be on “non-speaking terms” with Sanzu. But let’s put everything back into context : Sanzu “used a damn katana and slashed all of his friends” (Baji ; chapter 270) (which also doesn't support the 'it's because of the curse' explanation or the "You can't erase the curse! [...] I've been following Mikey as if I was in a trance [...]"(chapter 275) of Sanzu. Because there wasn't a curse in the original timeline to 'explain' Sanzu's behavior), and Baji himself says to Shinichiro “Why do you give a fuck about somebody like him ?”(same chapter). Whether Takeomi blames himself for how Sanzu turned out or not, Sanzu at best hurt his friends, at worst killed them. And in this timeline, Takeomi still has Senju to look after – hence, he can’t let Sanzu interact with her, and he refuses to talk with him after what he did (whereas in Bonten, Senju is dead and Takeomi came back in the game and ends up accepting murder as part of his, their, life) Takeomi is also against Mikey killing (South), as he says “Are you even human!? There’s no reason for you to go that far, y’know?!”(chapter 233) which Mikey kindly answers to by kicking Takeomi in the chin and saying “you're better off dead, too.”(same chapter). Shinichiro, like Sanzu, justifies it ; “He just attacked them because they were talking shit about Manjiro. Isn’t that how Haruchiyo is ?”. Would Shinichiro have justified it in another timeline, though ? If Mikey was okay, if Emma was there, if his grandfather didn’t die… Would he have accepted Sanzu’s actions ? Shinichiro in the original timeline, is in deep, deep denial about his entire life collapsing around him.

One second he’s working at a job he likes and wants to do, the other he is a university student, a nurse and his brother’s main and only caregiver. One second, he lives with what is left of his family, the other his brother is his only family left, and he can’t leave the hospital. Not only did his life go downhill after Mikey’s accident, he must blame himself for it too. Why did Mikey have his accident ? Because he didn’t want to lend the Concorde to Baji and the rest. Who bought the Concorde as a gift for him ? Shinichiro. He guided his brother, the boy he raised, to his death, and the girl he raised is nowhere to be seen (which might have been in part his fault since he was too busy studying for Mikey to pay attention to her), even though he had promised to his father to look after the both of them (chapter 269, “Father [...] I’ll take care of both Manjiro and Emma for you.”). His parents, his grandparents, he had nothing left. But Mikey is still alive. So he keeps on focusing on that, only that. Mikey can’t interact with people, nobody knows if he is aware of his surroundings, but he is alive and that fact alone is the only thing keeping Shinichiro from facing reality, from realizing that at this point, he is his family on his own, it’s the only thing keeping him going. He has to keep Mikey alive, to the price of his health (chapter 270, Baji: “In order to get the qualifications to be a caregiver he had to study while working in the hospital. I’m sure he doesn't even have time to sleep, his life is a total mess”; Wakasa: “I was worried that you'd be the first to die [...] Right now you're just rotting away”), his money, his morals (same chapter, Shinichiro: “I've gotten involved in many shady businesses. So I could help Manjiro in whatever he needed. I've done whatever therapies and even paid a lot for those suspicious religious groups”) anything, anything for Mikey. So of course, Haruchiyo was justified in his actions, no matter what Baji or Takeomi might say (plus, Baji says all kinds of things (“He isn't right in the head.”) but he still tags along and interact with Haruchiyo, he doesn’t fool many people. Then again, does Baji have any friends ? If “there’s nothing great about middle school”, he can’t meet Chifuyu, and who knows if he met any other founding members, if he met Kazutora at least.) because killing for Mikey is exactly what Shinichiro does.

The homeless man tells him to gain the power he killed his predecessor, and for a man who has lost everything, killing isn’t much. Except it doesn’t work. Shinichiro doesn’t go back to the past instantly after killing this man. His last hope is gone. And it wasn’t even one – he helplessly believed in the idea of time leaping because it was the only thing left he could believe in. So he kills himself. There’s nothing left anyway. Wakasa, Benkei, Takeomi, Haruchiyo, Baji ? Not enough. And then it works. He’s back. He saves Mikey. Then when he unexpectedly goes back to his present (2003) and goes look for the homeless man, he doesn’t find him. Probably to talk, to thank him. But the thing is, he killed this man. But not once is he seen feeling guilt about this. Denial ? Maybe. Or maybe it’s because he finds it justifiable. He killed for Mikey, for his baby brother, for his own sanity. One doesn’t mean the other isn’t true – he could justify it to stay in denial. He dies too soon after for him to learn to cope with what he did anyway.

There’s also the fact that out of everyone, he goes to Wakasa to tell him about the original timeline. Not Takeomi (who isn’t doing well in any point anyway), and not Benkei (who… we don’t know), but Wakasa. And he confesses his murder to him (as we’re told by Mikey, chapter 268 : “I was informed by Wakasa” ; chapter 274 : “the curse Shinichiro created by killing the time leaper… that is what my dark impulses are.”), the same way he confessed what he did in his previous timeline and what he thought of doing (“In these four years, I've gotten involved in many shady businesses [...] Maybe I should kill them all for deceiving me.” (chapter 270)).

So, while in the original timeline, Takeomi focuses on Senju even if that means neglecting Sanzu, Shinichiro focuses on Mikey which leads to Emma running away (to where, we don’t know). And those two little sisters fit their role differently. While Emma cooks (she is seen several time cooking; and to Draken after he asked her if she was housekeeping “well, gramps is old and…” (chapter 263)), likes cute things (the teddy bear she wanted and Draken got for her birthday), isn’t a fighter and in the final timeline becomes a housewife, Senju chases Mikey, Baji, and Sanzu around, wants to play with their toys (Mikey’s concorde), trains at Wakasa and Benkei’s gym and is a gang member. Takemichi refrains her to buy punk clothes and even though she still buys a lot of items, she prefers Brahman’s uniform and she goes shopping because Takeomi tells her to (“We’re shopping in Harajuku because Takeomi told me to ‘do some girly stuff sometimes.’ This is his card.”) and gives her his credit card (whose money comes from Brahman’s activities, so as to whether it’s his or Senju’s decisions leading to him being rich..). They’re both feminine, but Senju is a bit more of a tomboy in what she likes. Emma doesn’t feel lonely (“Since then, I've never felt lonely. Not even once”)(she has friends her age, such as Hinata), Senju clings to Takemichi the moment he joins Brahman (“Brahman’s full of old guys, so I’m glad people my age are joining”(chapter 216);”So can i think of us as friends now ?”(chapter 219))(seemingly, her only friends remain Mikey and Baji, whom she likely hasn't seen in years, even before Valhalla arc). They are also the only girls Takemichi saw in bra (chapter 9/chapter 216) but uh.. I don't want to know if that was made on purpose or not. But it joins the feminine/tomboy dichotomy – when Emma undressed, she had something else in mind (which, fortunately, didn't happen) and she has lace underwear, whereas Senju is very uninhibited (“Oh, it's fine. It's just sports bra”, chapter 216) and is wearing a sports bra like she says. They were raised the same way (Emma taking care of/helping her grandfather with chores ; Senju being forbidden to use ‘ore’ by Takeomi because it’s not ‘girlish’, making her go shopping for her to ‘do some girlish stuffs’; both being surrounded by men/boys (who are gang members, or former)) so it’s not because of outside influences they came to have different personalities and behaviors – Senju doesn’t fight or is tomboy-ish because she was raised among men (heck, she lives/lived at her grandmother’s while Emma had no woman/girl family members), she simply likes what society deems ‘for boys’ because she is herself and likes those things ; same for Emma, she doesn’t force herself to be someone she isn’t.

The Akashi are a motherless family but we don’t know why. If the Sano parents are dead (beside Karen, Emma’s mom) then I have two theories coming to mind. Either, the Akashi parents are alive or, they are indeed dead and the father in charge of raising them is Senju and Sanzu’s but not Takeomi's (or a mix of both, who knows). There are various details pointing to Takeomi being half-siblings with Senju and Sanzu.

First, it would be another obvious parallel with the Sano → Emma is Shinichiro and Mikey’s half-sister, but make it a twist by making the half-sibling the oldest instead of the youngest. Second, Manjiro (万次郎) and Shinichiro (真一郎) share a kanji and so do Haruchiyo (春千夜) and Senju (千咒)– if their parents wanted to give them names with a same kanji why don’t they all share it ? I get it with Emma (her mom probably named her and we don’t know how involved her father was in her life, plus, 郎 is a kanji that literally means ‘son/boy’, but she could have have a name ending with 子(ko) meaning ‘child’ and who’s only used in feminine names), but Takeomi ? If they wanted to do that, even if Sanzu and Senju came after, couldn’t they choose 武 or 臣 ? Both feminine and masculine names with those kanji seem to exist (and even if they didn’t, it’s the Japanese name system, they could very much invent it – that’s what they did for Senju!(can’t find information on this name like Wakui decided to write it)). And third, the Sano brothers look a lot alike (Mikey did get his hair color from his father but beside that, they both look a lot like their mother) while Emma looks like her mom (they don’t realize straight away she’s their sister “Isn’t she a foreigner ?”, chapter 123 and Takemichi, Hinata and Naoto don’t realize it either and think she’s dating Mikey for a brief moment in chapter 66 (although Takemichi ends up saying “They do have some sorta resemblance actually” after being told, but Mikey asks him “Really ?”), Sanzu and Senju both look extremely alike while Takeomi doesn’t (different hair color, eye shape, eyelashes, eyebrows - perhaps same eye color).

If we go along with this theory, which also makes their mother the parent they share and not their father like the Sano do (like they stay at their grandmother’s but the Sano stay at their grandfather’s), then the answer as to when Takeomi stopped living with his biological dad and moved in with his step-father would be important. Which one is responsible for how he raises his siblings, or perhaps they are both at fault ? When did their mom leave/die? Did someone ever tell Sanzu and Senju Takeomi was their half-brother ? If Takeomi’s step-father’s family name is Akashi, then Takeomi doesn’t use his birth family name either. And since Takeomi’s mom left him, does he feel the same way Emma feels about it ? (not saying his mother left for the same reason/the same way)

Or they could share the same father and have a different mother like the Sano. Either way, I’m craving for more information about them. They better not stay the “mysterious siblings” forever. Wakui pls

The Sano siblings are 4, we all know that. Izana is a Sano. So what if he throws the parallels off-balance ? He doesn’t. If you’re as delusional as I am, Muto is the Akashi’s Izana.

While Izana knew Shinichiro and Emma, and never got to know Mikey before dying in Tenjiku, Muto knew Sanzu and never got to know Takeomi and Senju. When they met, Mikey had lost Shinichiro and Emma, Sanzu left his home (and most likely stopped interacting with his siblings - although the “Haruchiyo doesn't like the fact im the head of Brahman. He doesn't like that I'm the strongest and that Takeomi endorses me” of Senju in chapter 216 means that he made his disapproval known). Izana knew of Mikey (Shinichiro kept talking about him), Muto didn’t know of Sanzu’s siblings. Muto also has the same age gap with Sanzu (and Senju) that Izana has with Mikey (and Emma). Izana was meant to parallel Mikey, Muto was meant to… parallel Takeomi. He parallels Sanzu too, in some points (staying loyal to their first ‘king’, being very harsh on betrayers/spies, having nowhere to go, Muto to Sanzu, chapter 206, “You don't have anywhere you belong ? You and I are pretty alike.”) but Sanzu said “I would've loved to have a big brother like you”(chapter 206) and so… either Wakui came up with Mucho or Takeomi first. Maybe he didn't even intend to narratively tie them in the first place. But they're still shaped in a way to be opposite. Sanzu took Mucho as his big brother figure first because he’s the opposite of the big brother Sanzu got and who failed him. Mucho’s betrayal against Mikey leaves him to die by Sanzu’s hands anyway, however, by betraying Mikey, he also betrayed Sanzu’s trust. His big brother failed him, again. A brother who told him “it's fine to be devoted to the king, but take care of yourself, too.”(chapter 206), not only validating his actions but saying he’s important as well, a brother who gave him his jacket, a brother who is the reason behind his favorite food (Sanzu’s favorite food is cheesecake for Cozy Corner and Mucho’s failure/heroic story explains why : “to make Haruchiyo Sanzu open up, Mucho bought him cheesecake from his favorite shop, Cozy Corner. The atmosphere was awkward and Mucho asked if something was wrong, to which Sanzu replied that he hated cheese, but would give it a try. There was no conversation after that.”), a brother who tried to make him open up, who tried to understand him, a brother who thought handing him a mask was a good idea because he was “missing out because of those scars” (chapter 206). Another perhaps useful information is that Sanzu dislikes “smothering people”, which was probably what Takeomi was to him (we already know Takeomi likes, has to be in control).

We only have one example of a moment the Akashi siblings spent together, only the three of them. And that’s Senju’s “it's super sparkly ! I haven't been [in an amusement park] since second grade of elementary school !” (chapter 219) and her hidden volume cover (which happened the same year Sanzu got his scars so between April 1st and July 30th 1999).

(Takeomi is the only character, on a (hidden or not) volume cover, we can’t see the face of. Most of them look directly at the reader, and if they don’t we can still see a bit of their face (just like Sanzu and Senju here).)

Final Timeline

It’s not a rant about the entire ending, that’s not the purpose of this post so I’ll only stick with Takeomi.

He’s the only one I have a problem with in this ending. Not him in particular, but his role, his job. Mikey and Takemichi fixed everything (the best they could), including the Akashi siblings’ relationship. All three of them work together.

I won’t say it’s bad for Takeomi’s development, it depends how it’s done and since it’s a happy ending for everyone, it shouldn’t impact anyone badly, But. Was him being the ‘self-proclaimed producer’ necessary ? I’m not against it, especially not if he has another (official) job on the side (and we know he’s smart enough to have one, and one who pays lots, which would also explain how he succeeds to ‘produce’ Senju & Haruchiyo). The only small problem I have with this is – he still lives by being someone important, needed, for somebody else, living on somebody else’s success. And it can be healthy ! But why is it ‘self-proclaimed’. Yuzuha isn’t Hakkai’s ‘self proclaimed’ manager. She is. Takeomi could very much be Haruchiyo and Senju’s producer. Sure they’re youtubers and I don't know if they can have official producers, but why? Takeomi, especially final timeline Takeomi, doesn’t need to brag about others’ achievements as if it was his own, he needs to brag about what he can and what he does by himself, without the need of anybody else.

And I don't say it’s what happens in the final timeline. But it still leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. I hope he has another job where he constantly realizes he is the only reason why it succeeds. Because I don't need him to say ‘I raised them’ or ‘I produce them’ when someone praises Senju and Haruchiyo, as if he was the reason they became famous. I don’t need him to get Haruchiyo and Senju under the spotlight to steal it from them. I need him to be their producer because he can, because he wants to help and bond with them, without taking what they did for himself. I need him to have an individual job, to have built his career without anyone’s help, to see that he can succeed alone. And unfortunately, that’s not what this last chapter made me feel was happening.

Still, it is (and that’s why we’re here for, not me rumbling about how Takeomi’s job is the only one to piss me off because he’s the only character who ends up with a job that can screw up his development). First, I'm so glad the Akashi actually get to be siblings. There are still some issues they had had to fix (with Mikey and Takemichi’s help-), Takeomi and Haruchiyo’s relationship was already pretty bad (Takeomi has his scar on his face) but it got fixed ! Second, Takeomi deserves to feel needed (and to be), which he is by being their producer and i wish, if both sides do take advantages of the other, that it’s in the most healthy way (if that makes sense) – that “the money [...] spent out of Takeomi’s pocket” was his idea and Haruchiyo and Senju accepted (with perhaps the intention of paying Takeomi back later, maybe not with money, since Takeomi doesn’t seem to need it, but still, to do something to show Takeomi it was appreciated) and that Haruchiyo and Senju thanks him publicly, without his ego feasting on it.

I hope he got his self-esteem restored. Which of course that’s what happened, we’re in the final timeline and everything’s good. But. I really hope he did.

And I choose to believe that the “same old Takeomi.” from Shinichiro means Takeomi the same as he was when they were kids. Maybe not exactly, because Black Dragon 1st generation and Takeomi’s superiority complex happened, but that Shinichiro recognizes his childhood friend is doing well, that he’s still here somewhere and got healed.

+ What’s in a name ?

(I'm gonna do something I didn't do for the Shiba (there wasn't much to say about it for them))

Writers are careful with how they name their characters (I'm making generalities here) – and it's especially true with Japanese and Chinese Writers whose characters' name change meaning depending on how they decide to write it

So it's been odd to me, when I realized the ‘Take’ in both Takeomi and Takemichi were the same. Why would Wakui do that? It can't be a coincidence, right ? And indeed. The Akashi siblings' names hold meaning.

Let's start with 明司 (Akashi). 明 (aka) means light, bright and is made of the Kanji used for sun (日) and the one used for moon (月). Then, 司 (shi) means official, director, administrator and was once used to design governors the Emperor had appointed to carry out the imperial policies in provinces. So 司 is for people in power, but not at the top. As said before, 司 seems to come from 后 which is the same kanji upside down and which means ‘emperor, king, monarch..’.

武 from both Takeomi and Takemichi means ‘military, war’. Takemichi's name is actually made of the exact Kanji as Budō (武道, way of war/way of the martial arts). 臣 (Omi) means ‘retainer, subject’ and could be used as a ‘I’ when addressing one's master. Ah, and it can be pronounced ‘Shin’ by itself. Because of course it does.

Takeomi is either: the warrior retainer or the war/military retainer. But he can also be in some way, the director of the light (and so can be Sanzu and Senju.)

I've got more to say about Sanzu than Senju so I'll start with her. Search "Senju Japanese name" into a search bar, you won't end up finding it written like Wakui decided to write it. Not that it means it doesn’t exist, but it's not popular. And for cause, Wakui chose to write Senju: 千咒 – A thousand curses.

Now, who would name their child "curse", I don't know. Perhaps it's one of those names where they're supposed to be degrading so as to push bad spirits/ghosts away? I have two theories for this but they’re without any real basis. One of them is ; the person who named her was really angry at her birth and since we don’t know where is/what happened to their mother.. Yeah (either she died giving birth or for some reasons she named Senju that way before leaving/disappearing). Or it could be one of those ‘Kira Kira names’ (names outside of the norm parents decided were cool). Anyway, Senju thinks she is the reason why both Mikey and Sanzu (+Baji) turned up that way, which isn't true as we're being told after, but Senju thought she was the reason behind Mikey's curse – without knowing it was a curse.

I didn't find any real concrete stuff about Kawaragi. Which is sad. 瓦 means roof tile and 城 means castle. When put together with the Kanji 礫, 瓦礫 means rubbish, wreckage, debris. With the Kanji 解, it becomes 瓦解; collapse, downfall. Normally I won't dare to talk about things who seem to be a bit too coincidental. But 土崩瓦解 doesn't feel coincidental. It can either mean 'complete collapse' or, '(something) going to pieces', meaning 'broke beyond repair'. Which she did. Or rather, thinks she did (not only the toy plane, but “Ever since that day, they all changed… mikey, baji and Haruchiyo. They all changed, and it's because of me” (chapter 241, Senju)). Also, 瓦 is 万 but backward and 万 is the first Kanji of ‘Manjiro’ (万次郎). Which makes a lot more sense. I guess ? For 城; there's 成, meaning 'promoted' it's notably used in Shogi where some pieces can be, well, promoted.

I like to think Sanzu started calling himself such because Mikey and Baji decided to find themselves different names (even if Baji is never even once referred as Ed or Edward). But whatever the reason, Sanzu is one hell of a name. Quite literally, hell. If you look up "Sanzu'' and ignore the Tokyo Revengers-related things, you'd scramble upon: 三途の川 – Sanzu no Kawa. River of the three crossings. A place the deads have to cross after their deaths, and which leads them either to heaven, to hell, or to resurrection. Souls get punished there. Every sin gets met with a trial.

(Plus, it's interesting to know that those you get drag to Jigoku, "hell", fall in the water/river where a bunch of snakes await them. Whereas people who get a pass to Tengoku, heaven walk over a bridge. Sanzu is never called ‘sanzu’ in the original timeline. But you know how Shinichiro died the first time ? Yeah, you do. He isn’t called Sanzu once in the original timeline, and even if he is in the final timeline, I decide to believe it’s because Mikey and Takemichi are too used to calling him that way to realize it and he just picked it up.)

春千夜 (Haruchiyo), is the only name among the Akashi who don't have any kind of negativity in it. Senju has curses, Takeomi has retainer (which isn't a negative thing in itself, but we've already established that Takeomi wants to be so much more than to be at someone's else service), Haruchiyo means "Spring of a thousand nights". Just like Senju, he has 千, ‘a thousand’ in his name.

Remember the 武 from Takeomi and Takemichi ? Yeah ? Well I'm a bit of a liar. Rather than a liar, I didn't say everything. There's a third character with 武 in his name. But it isn't pronounced 'Take' for one, and for two, it's in his family name, not his first

武藤  泰宏

Muto Yasuhiro

(I can't imagine the pain he has to go through every time he writes his name down. 藤 is one hell of a kanji.)

Ah... Mucho. Sanzu's big brother figure. Better than the other. But who did the only thing Sanzu would kill anyone for: betray Mikey. But that's not the point here, we're here to talk about his name. Beside the obvious 武 meant to add to the fact he's Sanzu's big brother, like Takeomi but reversed, 藤 means wisteria. 泰宏(Yasuhiro) means "peaceful' and 'broad' which describes Mucho's personality accurately but, but, but. In 泰 there's 𡗗 just like in 春 ;) (it actually doesnt mean much because taiju also has it in one of his kanji but shh). Or, just like Sanzu shares a kanji with his sister, he shares half one with his not related by blood brother. And ⺢ is a variant of 水, water, just like Sanzu is a river.

朕 is also in there. It's the royal ‘I’, ‘we’ – completely opposite of the servant 臣, ‘I’. More globally, wisterias represent the imperial family in Japan; thanks to the Fujiwara who impacted Japan by a lot when they were the ones ruling the country. And I’ll stop there with Mucho because I may be going too deep here and at some point digging further is meaningless.

Shinichiro and Mikey’s names are… It made me chuckle, not gonna lie. Not because of what the kanji means, but because those are extremely common kanji found in names. 一郎 in 真一郎(Shinichiro) means ‘first’ and ‘boy/son’. 次郎 in 万次郎(Manjiro) means ‘next’ and ‘boy/son’. These (reading ‘Ichiro’ and ‘Jiro’ by themselves) were rather common names for children from not-upper class families. It’s much less common nowadays. Then there’s 真 who means ‘real, sincere, genuine, truth’ and 万  who means ‘ten thousand’. And I didn't quite understand why their parents would choose that kanji, but if you add 全 to it then it gives 万全 or, ‘perfection, flawlessness’, and suddenly it makes my heart melt and also more sense. (it also seems to come from his grandfather’s name Mansaku (万作))

Sano 佐野 too, is a rather common name. Or at least half a common name. since 佐 may make you think of 佐藤 (Sato) which is the most common Japanese family name. However, the 藤 comes from the Fujiwara clan, since the Sano don’t have this kanji (unlike Muto) we can say they don’t have samurai ancestors (or if they do, it got lost along the way). It seems like family name with two out of three of the following kanji : 田, 中 or 村 are reasonably common. And 野 (Sano) has both 田 and 村. (although unlike Tanaka(田中), Nakamura(中村) and others they are stuck inside one kanji).

Unlike Akashi which describes someone of the upper-class, the Sano are everyday average people (Sano means ‘to help’ and ‘field, plain’ but also a prefix meaning ‘wild, lacking a political post’). Except they aren’t. But Wakui must find himself funny for this.

EDIT: 'Sano' is a city in the Tochigi Prefecture in Kanto, which economy revolves around agriculture and light manifacturing. It was also once the name of a clan.

(By the way, the -no of Terano (寺野) is the same kanji. As in, Terano South. And there are some parallels between Mikey and him.. (ill mother, no father, a parent who's a foreigner – but Mikey was born and raised in Japan while South had Brazil), person who raised him showed him the world of delinquency (but they had clearly different view of it), go live with their grandparent(s), person who raised them died when they were 12 (Shin died before Mikey had turned 13) because of ‘dark impulses’ (South himself; Kazutora), they both have ‘dark impulses’ (although we might never know why/how/if they are really the same dark impulses for South), they are both known by a English name rather than their official Japanese one (but Mikey chose his while Dino named South)… We don’t have enough about South and I don't like it.)

(Even worse, because if you’re as delusional as I am, you would notice that if you take out two strokes of 南(South) you end up with the kanji 幸. And since Mikey loved his mother very much, and she loved him very much, and South loved his mother very much… Then his mother must have loved him very much as well (even if she was incapable of fully taking care of him). And 幸 means ‘happiness, luck, blessing fortune’. But then it’s a girl name. But perhaps that’s what his mother wanted her child to be named if it was a daughter ? It’s still hidden in the ‘’Minami’’(南) Anyway, as I said, I’m being delusional and 南 is not an unusual name in Japan. Leave me and my headcanons alone. There's also the possibility it was his father who was Japanese, of course. After all South’s name is Japanese, but then, we don't know a thing about his father so we can't say if him and South’s mom were married. But no matter which one was his Japanese parent, he either had no vocabulary in Japanese or only the basis and had had to learn everything when he was sent to live with his grandparents in Japan – who probably don't speak a word of Portuguese so it didn’t help South having very violent habits. They couldn't communicate.)

I didn’t find something that caught my attention with Baji’s kanji. Sad. But Edward means ‘guardian, protector’ so at least he chose a name that does describe him well. Micheal means ‘who is like god ?’ and of course reminds you of Michael the Archangel and knowing his mother called him ‘my angel’, well my heart is currently aching. I mean… Baji is made of a kanji meaning ‘place’ and another meaning ‘ground’ (the kanji for Keisuke means ‘jewels/corner’ and ‘meditation’ and i really have no idea for those) – Michael is one of the most famous angel name and Sanzu is linked to the afterlife so.. perhaps Baji is the ‘human’ of them three ?

(Baji Keisuke is written 圭介場地. Out of all these kanji there's only 圭 I perhaps found something interesting about. In Shogi, there's a piece called 成桂; 'promoted Katsura' and its abrevation is 圭. Btw, in Shogi, the 'king' is 玉将 or 王将 (if you're a lower rank player or a challenger VS if you're a higher rank player or a reigning champion) notice the dot ? It's 瓦 from 'Kawaragi' vs 万 from 'Manjiro' again)

Emma and Izana's can't be analyzed this much. I didn't find anything for Izana (If i go on Behind the name, in japanese the name Izana (rare and only used in pop culture) comes from the verb izanau ; to invite, to ask someone to do, to call for, to tempt, to lure, to entice ; but honestly, searching for the etymology of this name doesn’t give you a lot of answer (not enough sites say the same thing for me to believe it)) and Emma is "universal, whole" when it comes of German etymology and "all containing" when it comes of Hebrew etymology.

Also it’s interesting how Sanzu and Senju decided to change their family name and not their first like Mikey and Baji. Plus, Baji gets called by his family name every time so it didn’t serve much – like Senju who changed her family name but is never addressed by it in the story (even Brahman members yell ‘’Senju’’). But then Mikey changed his first name and gets called by it and Sanzu changed his family name and gets called by it. One option for each possibility, so it could be in/Wakui’s purpose! The one who didn’t use their other name as much as their real one are the ones to die, whereas the one who, to overstate the point, changed their identity by identifying with something that wasn’t initially them, actually got those selves erased. It’s more clear for Sanzu. Sanzu came up with ‘Sanzu’ and ‘Akashi Haruchiyo’ wasn’t anymore. Mikey came up with this name for another reason but it was still to get rid of ‘Manjiro’. And he didn’t get rid of ‘Manjiro’ until his brother, the only person left to call him that, died. Mikey’s flashback (chapter 264-265: “I.. really like ‘strong’ people [...] Until that day [Shinichiro’s death] [...] I was looking for ‘something’ other than strength [...] All the guys in Toman are good. They're so good but there's something I can't figure out. I wonder how long… there has been ‘something’ dark inside my heart [...] ‘strong’ alone is not enough [...] After all, all I need is ‘darkness’.”) tells us he was already starting to follow his Dark Impulses ; after his brother’s death. He confesses it to Kisaki (“I wonder how long… there has been ‘something’ dark inside my heart. Sometimes that ‘something’ expands and drives me to destroy absolutely everything”). Manjiro Sano died with his brother. Other people may still call him that way, like his grandfather, but Mikey is Mikey. And this innocent name he once chose to make his sister feel less lonely became a metaphor for his incoming loss of sense of self.

We can also add that Shinichiro may have not changed the way he called Mikey because since his brother, 'Manjiro', was the only thing left from his life before it went downhill, calling him 'Mikey' instead of 'Manjiro' would have created even more of a distance between Shinichiro and his past 'normal' life from his childhood.

Baji and Mikey chose their name (Micheal & Edward) to try to make Emma open up. To get closer to her (especially Mikey). And Emma gets her birth name (Kurokawa) changed as Sano, which makes her even closer to her two brothers (and less from Izana). Sanzu and Senju chose their name to separate themself from Takeomi (and each other).

Of course, they aren't the only characters being best-known as a name they chose themselves of have been given by others. Draken for example, doesn't show any kind of resentment or even neutrality against his name; Ken is still present in Draken. We also know he chose it as a child (like the others), but (unlike the others) a reason is never given - he most likely thought it was cool; just like Mitsuya's dragon and his new tattoo were. Same with Benkei. It is written in katakana in the manga, but with kanji Benkei and Keizo have the same 'Kei'. Benkei is one of the most famous historical figure in Japan, by the way. (He is the servant of Minamoto no Yoshitsune, born Ushiwakamaru. Birth name which shares a lot of kanji with 'Imaushi Wakasa'. Both were great fighters). South, is another example of a name given to change one's identity – but South didn't name himself 'South'; Dino did, after making him kill someone, or giving him a bloody baptism if you prefer. And 'Minami' means 'South' but Minami never grew up enough for us or himself to know who he was.

(+ 

mikey baji sanzu and senju are four and so are bd 1st gen doesn’t feel like a coincidence. But i cant think of something that makes it very interesting. Wakasa and sanzu both know about the og timeline, baji and takeomi are used as parallels at least once, senju has some commons traits with Shinichiro, but mikey does too (and more), senju and benkei.. both like MMA ? And their favorite catchers are rivals ? Thats not much for me to talk about ngl)

[joes-sha-la-la-la-girl]

When Love and Hate Collide: Chapter 2

Series Masterlist

Assuming it was her luggage being brought up, Y/N hurried to the door. However, as she pulled the door open, she was greeted with the smiling faces of Phil and Rick.

Phil spoke first as he stepped forward slightly, “Wanna join us for dinner?”

“I’m not sure, I was just going to order room service.” Y/N told them. Despite her gentle refusal, Rick and Phil wouldn’t take no for an answer. 

“Come on, we all want you to join us.” Rick encouraged. Noting the sceptical look on her face he soon added, “Joe’s not coming.”

Y/N sighed and looked at the two men’s faces. Knowing that Joe wasn’t going to be there both settled her and upset her. She didn’t want to make him uncomfortable around his band mates, so him not attending relieved her slightly. Though, she couldn’t shake the disappointment that he wouldn’t be eating with them. 

In spite of his apparent disdain for her, Y/N still wanted to get to know him. Something about him intrigued her and predominantly, she wanted to know why he didn’t like her. She remembered Rick’s words, but a part of her knew that it wasn’t just because she was new that he didn’t want to talk to her. 

Realising she had been quiet for a long time, she quickly slipped on her heels, which she had previously discarded by the door, and followed the two men down to the hotel dining hall. They all made small talk as they walked and soon enough she was greeted with Viv and Sav smiling at her. 

Phil pulled her chair out and allowed her to sit down before moving to his own chair next to her. Greetings were shared again although it had only been an hour or so since she had last seen them. They all ate their meals and conversed. Y/N found herself fitting in with the crowd and realising that they were just normal men who happened to be famous. 

Saying goodnight to them all once again, Y/N went up to her room. As she stepped out of the lift and onto her floor she almost ran into someone.

“Oh my goodness, I am so sorry.” She apologised as she looked up at who she walked into. She was not prepared for it to be Joe scowling down at her. Clearing her throat, she wanted to apologise again, Joe being the last person she wanted to annoy, but was stopped by him talking first.

“You really should watch where you’re going, Miss Y/L/N.” 

Y/N quickly nodded at him. “I am so sorry.” 

Joe just looked at her and carried on past her, not giving her another word. Y/N released a breath that she didn’t know she was holding in and went to her room. She knew there was a time difference but she decided to call her best friend. Picking up the hotel phone she dialled the number she knew off by heart.

“Hello?” Y/N heard Bonnie’s voice on the other end.

“Bonnie, it’s Y/N.” She smiled hearing her friend’s voice for the first time in a few days.

“Y/N! Hi, how's LA?”

“Well I haven’t seen much of it yet but my hotel room is great.” Y/N joked. Bonnie let out a playful scoff.

“Okay then. How's the band? Are they as hot in real life as they are on the posters?” 

Y/N let out a laugh. Of course her best friend would come out with something like this.

“Well, I don’t want to objectify them but yes they are.”

Bonnie giggled for a second before turning to a slightly more serious tone. “How are they all treating you?”

“Sav, Vivian, Rick and Phil are all really lovely and have made me feel really welcome.”

“And what about Joe?” 

Y/N sighed. She should have known Bonnie would ask about Joe. She was a big fan and he was her favourite member. 

“Well… I haven’t really spoken to him much, but every interaction so far has been less than positive.”

“What do you mean?” Bonnie asked her, sensing the slight sadness in her best friend’s voice. Y/N went on and explained the entire day to Bonnie.

“I mean I know he just went through a nasty divorce not long ago but that doesn’t explain as to why he doesn’t like you.” 

Y/N released another sigh. “I didn’t know about the divorce but you’re right. It’s hardly my fault. I‘m just a tour assistant. Rick did say something about how it is because I’m new but it feels like more than that.”

“Try not to overthink it, Y/N/N.” 

Y/N nodded, despite knowing that Bonnie couldn’t see her.

“How are you holding up otherwise?” 

Y/N automatically knew what Bonnie was referring to. Last month Y/N walked in on her boyfriend Scott cheating on her and since then had been struggling with wondering as to why he had done so.

“You know it wasn’t your fault he cheated on you don’t you?” Bonnie asked when Y/N had been quiet for some time.

“I know but I can't help but wonder if I could have done anything differently.”

“Y/N, you are perfect, he was a tosser. He had you and he lost you and that is too bad for him. Go and live your wonderful life while he sleeps around and you will end up happier than he could ever dream of being.”

Y/n smiled at her friend's use of the insult and yet again nodded before she verbally agreed. The two talked for a while longer before Y/N decided to get some rest. She also knew it was early morning in England and didn’t want to keep Bonnie up any longer. Although they did both have insomnia and it wasn’t the first time they had been up all night together. 

Y/N decided it would be best to avoid any interaction between her and Joe and just do her job. There was a huge lump in Y/N’s chest when she thought about avoiding Joe but she pushed it aside. She knew that the only thing she could do was go to sleep.

*

The morning came and after Y/N got ready for the day she went downstairs to meet the band for breakfast. She noticed that the group travelling together occupied two tables and there was one seat left available. Next to Joe.

Making her way to the table, everyone but Joe greeted her and she returned their pleasantries. Even swallowing her nerves and greeting Joe. It wasn’t until he heard his name that he lifted his head and nodded once before looking away again. 

Once they had eaten Y/N had taken the opportunity to take out a notepad and get the band to make a list of food items they wanted her to buy for the bus. She made sure that there were vegetarian options as well. The only person who didn’t make an input was Joe. Making a note of it all, Y/N put away her notepad and the group got up moving towards the lifts so that the band could get ready for soundcheck and she could get ready to go shopping. 

On the way out of her room she saw that Joe was getting in the lift again, on his own. Y/N debated waiting for the next one but once Joe turned around he spotted her. He held the door open and waited for her to get in. She hurried herself and entered the lift hoping that she wouldn’t be alone and another band member, or any hotel guest, would join them

However, the doors closed leaving just the two of them in the lift.