#it’s not quirky or cute for me but a real ass disability

[lucysweatslove]

I told my best friend about some of the school shit and how I’ve felt a little micro-aggressed and discriminated against bc disability.

Her: “I will fucking slap a bitch.”

Me: “At least I have two friends who actually care and value me for me and don’t suck and aren’t performative and just like, value being a good human.”

Her: “I mean, I try. It’s hard when others suck and you want to punch their face.”

☠️☠️☠️

[lolliepops-rox]

It's very interesting to me, as a newer Homestuck fan, to see all the extensions for the offical-unoffical archives that 'fix'/remove 'problems' or 'problematic' parts of Homestuck. I was on Tumblr when Homestuck was at its peak and reblogged all the cute ship art, follow the outrageous ask blogs, my best friend did read it as it was still coming out¹. But I never actually read the comic itself, just kind waves from the sidelines. But I wasn't there to experience the big controversies in real time (i.e. 'peachy'). Hussie is not above critique, but I don't think he's a bigot or even a bad person. What he is, is a troll. A classic 2006 'I said something fucked up not because I believed it, but to get a reaction.' Which, I can see to someone who missed that time of the internet, and only knows now. In which people say those fucked up things, to get a reaction and cause they believe it.

And so to see people younger than me, but have joined the fandom at the same time as me, not understand this context, it feels wrong. The things people are willing to sweep under the rug cause it conflicts with their morals vs the things they condemn and blame Hussie for.

Homestuck is a very long, very complicated, but very important piece of art. To not consider every facet of it does it a disservice.

For something made by a 2006 troll, it put a lot of queer characters worth caring about in it. The alpha kids & trolls both exist to be parodies of their beta counterparts. This is partly why Dirk is queer, and that Dirk refuses a label. But is still allowed to opening like, then date, then break up with a boy. It's a response to how the fandom wrote & treated Dave. For those who know it, compare the S19Ep6 of South Park, Tweek X Craig. Matt & Trey, who in my opinion embody the same sort of troll sense of humour Hussie has, handle fandom making their characters being gay quite differently. Tweek & Craig in this EP aren't treated as genuinely queer characters, but the kids trapped in what the town has decided are wacky hijinks of this week. It's not necessarily bad, but compared to Dirk it feels way less genuine.

There's topics I can't talk on fully like the way Hussie's racial biases appear in various characters, as I'm from a completely different country. But in my very non-american opinion, it reads more as 'someone who has never thought to question the stereotypes they were raised with', than as someone who is genuinely and actively racist. There is a difference, and as a mixed kid that's important to me.

I'm not really sure how physically disabled people feel about the way Hussie wrote their physically disabled characters (but if people have written about this I'd love to read and linked to me) but he definitely uses mental disabilities/illnesses as a substitute for the word 'quirky' without thinking much about it (i.e. Nepeta is off-handedly called autistic) it's not really great, but the bar is so low when it comes to these things that my tourettic ass cling to Mituna like a lifeline.

Maybe I had a further point here. Maybe my point was just antis in the Homestuck fandom is still weird to me when there's canon incest. Maybe I've drunk a fair bit of vodka while writing this. I have work in the morning. Good night beloved tumblrinas.

¹she gave me classpect and everything, and it's the one I use to this day, despite having a completely different theory on how classpects work. I also joined a cosplay ask blog despite never reading Homestuck (at the time) cos she asked me to (simp) and bought black lipstick to do AMom.

[imaginarianisms]

okay so. one thing ive been meaning to talk about in the rpc over the years is. the blatant ableism, sanism, racism & overall downplaying & watering down of serious issues such as cults to the point where nonsurvivors are rly out here making cult jokes which, to actual survivors, are like a massive slap in the face.

that's telling us "you don't matter".

on disabled characters & representation. i& genuinely don't remember the last time i& saw someone with a character who had a mobility aid or a wheelchair... if at all. i& genuinely don't remember the last time i& saw a disabled character actually Talk about their disability if it's even mentioned at all in threads & if it is it's usually a skinny cis white character, mostly cis white male characters, with the disability & fuck me& if there are any disabled characters of color at all.

i& genuinely don't remember the last time i& saw a character go indepth about the ableism & sanism they face. & i'm not saying that a disabled character has to let their disability define them but just like gender & orientation, a disability affects people & this doesn't just apply to physical disabilities. & i'm& not even getting into the way disabled & neurodivergent MUNS OF COLOR are treated, ESPECIALLY if their disability and/or neurodivergence is stigmatized.

i'm& not even getting into the stupid fucking way ppl go around throwing "delulu" everywhere as if they somehow have that right to mistreat schizospec & psychotic ppl & stigmatize us further. no, worstie, you're not fucking "delulu" for wanting your unlikely ship to be canon. no, you're not fucking "delulu" for wanting your crackpot theory to be true. it isn't some cutesy fucking trend you can hop on, theyre serious fucking issues. no worstie you're not "delulu" you're just sanist & hate psychotic people. stop using my& fucking symptoms as a stupid joke while stigmatizing me& for having them. i see a lot of nonpsys (for the unaware: nonpsys are people who dont have psychosis & aren't on the schizospec) using the word as if it's this cute quirky word to describe their fantasies & desires. its. literally not. delusions can INVOLVE fantasies & desires but arent those things on their own. it's not fucking funny to call yourself delusional as a joke & it's definitely not funny to just armchair diagnose people when a) you're not even a fucking doctor, psychologist or psychiatrist or any kind of medical professional & b) it's dehumanizing & c) i'm& betting y'all who use "delulu" have never even actually experienced a delusion, this isn't something you throw around for fun, it's an actual serious symptom with serious consequences for people who experience it. & as a schizospec did system myself i'm& Very Fucking Tired. noah fence but i& don't get delusions that're mostly trauma based & persecutory delusions just so y'all nonpsys can make it into another fun quirky thing & the same shit apply to ppl who use "psychopathic" "sociopathic" & "narcissistic" as an insult when most of the time personality disorders come from TRAUMA. & ESPECIALLY if you're autistic, you fucking know better

also. ppl are like "yeah i support systems!!!! :)))))) except fictive heavy systems, systems with lots of members, systems that share everything about themselves and systems who won't shut up about being systems. oh sorry your did and/or plurality makes me uncomfortable :(((((" i've& had people just. straight up refuse to acknowledge my& system at all & act like everything was fucking fine even when people claim to be my friend & give a fuck about me. my& older sister literally told me& to my& face that i& was lying for attention then she heard i& was actually dxed & she shut her ass up real quick. ive had people literally REFUSE to use our names or our pronouns despite KNOWING we're a system & some of us& were Also talking to these people. even from people who claim to be all like "oh i'm all for disabled people!! i'm all for respecting everyone's pronouns" but when it comes to our& plural ass they shut up real fucking quick. like. it won't kill y'all to ask about the rest of us&, about our& lives, showing us&.. idk, the latest episode of a show we've& never seen or a psd you made or introducing memes to us& & it definitely won't kill you to use an "&" by our names & pronouns or at the VERY FUCKING LEAST refer to us& as "y'all" or "you guys".

as someone w/ undxed aspd i& can tend to be very blunt especially if i'm& irritated. does that make me an evil person? uh. no. i& don't think so. someone w/ a personality disorder doesn't automatically mean an abuser & that goes ESPECIALLY with people with narcissistic personality disorder & antisocial personality disorder. disorders by themselves cannot be abusive. not everyone who's abusive has a personality disorder & even if they did, it's bc of their actions, not the disorder itself. & sometimes people just suck & are downright cunts.

if i& sound irritated its bc i& am. i'm& your local angry mean madcripple tryna tell y'all that this is a rpc. rp COMMUNITY. there are people who see this ableist shit. there are trauma survivors in your community. yes, this is worded aggressively but i& need y'all to understand that y'all Need to be able to engage with the anger of people with more stigmatized disorders & ESPECIALLY trauma survivors w/ more severe trauma & not just when we're being informative or entertaining to you if the rpc's gonna be better.

[friendofhayley]

It’s that time again! Thank you to all the fandom content creators for your art. Here are the best fics I read this month, and they’re all masterpieces. This rec includes 12 fics from the Teen Wolf and One Direction fandoms. The starred ones have made me forget my worries for a moment.

Sterek (Teen Wolf)

1. He’s…something by @acountrygirlsfun | shapeshifter Stiles - miscommunication - Derek doesn’t know how to show emotions - secret relationship - 22k

Stiles has to admit, keeping his secret under wraps is easier than he expected around his new-found werewolf friends.

Except for the Alpha that is never where he should be.

2. I Wanna Let Go And Know That I’ll Be Alright [orphaned] | bad Scott - healing - pre-Sterek - post-S5A - 21k

When Scott tells Stiles to ‘take a step back’ from pack life, Stiles takes it as an invitation to get his life back on track - sans the supernatural.

3. When the Universe Comes Knocking (It’s Polite to Open the Door) by @isthatbloodonhisshirt | high school crushes meet again! - oblivious boys - just KISS - secretary Stiles - 135k

It was like a door he’d nailed shut in his brain suddenly exploded open, all of his past confusion and anger and hurt and adoration flooding out at once. Stiles? Was it actually Stiles?!

Stiles, the guy he’d had a crush on for fucking years growing up. The guy who’d been an absolute dick to him their whole last year of high school.

The guy who’d told him he loved him in a dirty men’s bathroom on prom night while drunk and upset because he thought Kira was Derek’s girlfriend.

4. Your Love is Like an Ax to the Face (or, Plundering Hearts: Viking Edition) by @ghost-of-erica-reyes | college au - as slow burn as a 16k fic can be - enemies to friends to lovers - oblivious boys - 16k

In which Lydia is a ruthless walking fortune cookie, Scott is exposed to the relationship-curing potential of ménages-à-trois, and more importantly, Stiles is convinced he’s pissed off the wrong deity in Valhalla because the closest thing he gets to action is the weekly — and deadly — debates he has with his grumpy TA from History 201: Introduction to Vikings. All of this to Erica’s enjoyment.

Urgh, college.

5. I don’t need any help to be breakable (believe me) by @myhyperheart-alone | amnesia - so much fucking angst with a happy ending -  mutual pining - therapy - 35k

“He tried to kiss me.” “We know”, Scott says, placatingly, and Stiles rounds on him, fists clenched and eyes blazing. “No. No, you don’t”, he spits, “You have no idea.”

In which Derek has an accident and doesn’t remember anyone except Stiles.

6. *Ardently* by redpenny | regent au - chubby Stiles - disabled Derek - this is SO cute!!! - 13k

Mr Stilinski contends with the loss of his family’s funds, an unfortunate predilection for pastries, and an inconvenient attraction to this Season’s most eligible bachelor.

Lord Hale contends with a reluctant return to Society, hiding a war injury from meddling sisters, and the trials of courting a thoroughly oblivious young man.

7. *Puzzle Pieces* by @isthatbloodonhisshirt | can y’all believe the same author got 2 fics on here? I’m sorry for the notifications - and they were mates omg they were mates - ski resort - the boys are bad at communicating #surprise! - 89k

“Okay.” Stiles glanced at his phone, wincing at the battery being close to ten percent. It was probably time to call Scott. Turning off the flashlight, mostly to save battery and kind of freaking out over how dark it was—though the half-moon reflecting off the snow helped a bit—he opened his contacts with shaking hands and scrolled through to Scott’s name. Once he hit it, he put the phone to his ear, looking around, and froze.

The phone rang in his ear, but his eyes were locked on something big and moving through the trees.

Oh no. Oh no, no, no.

Larry (One Direction)

8. oh we’re in love aren’t we by @eeveelou | Harry is a trans man - college au - Harry is quirky and Louis loves it - so much fluff - 20k

Louis is trying to get through his second year of university while dealing with his three stupidly loud and stupidly in love roommates, a series of boring classes, and his job working the graveyard shift at his campus’s favorite drunk food shop. Harry is new to town and looking for somewhere to live when he finds a long-abandoned apartment that brings him right to Louis’s doorstep.

9. *a bright future behind you* by @socomicallygay | Orange is the New Black au - girl direction - there is a zourry threesome moment - this fic is hot hot hot and sweet sweet sweet - 12k

Orange is the New Black AU. Louis fucks a lot of people, Harry eats a lot of ass, Niall will smuggle a dildo to whomever gets more play, and Zayn thinks Harry and Louis should just make out already.

10. Say It First by rearviewdreamer | this so fucky angsty with a happy ending it had me yelling at Harry - groundhog day time travel - high school au - domestic fluff - 25k

When it comes to Louis, Harry feels like he has spent a lifetime getting it wrong, but on a chance night together where time mostly seems to be on his side, he gets the opportunity to try it all again. And again, and again, and again in an attempt to finally get it right before it’s too late.

11. A Real Work of Art by @lululawrence | high school au - childhood friends Larry - Harry is Marcel and soo oblivious - pure fluff - 11k

“I don’t understand,” Liam said for probably the fiftieth time in ten minutes. “You have to explain again how this is a bad thing.”

“Leeeeyummm,” Harry whined into the phone as he leaned his head onto his desk. “I felt like this year was my year for getting his attention, you know? That senior year I would finally get Logan Thompson to realize I exist! But he’s in almost every single one of my classes, Li. How am I supposed to survive that?”

“Easily,” Liam answered, with the same matter of fact tone his voice always took when Harry was in one of his fits. “He doesn’t know you exist, so it shouldn’t be a problem. Right?”

12. *gorgeous (it makes me so mad)* by resurrectdead | aaaaa Louis is such a scruff soft bad boy in this? like how he is in real life?? I’m dead??? - barista au - Clifford is the best wingdog - sexual tension - 29k

Harry’s a coffee barista with nothing really going on for him except for the occasional flirting with, some, particularly hot male customers. But when a new guy starts coming in, he suddenly doesn’t know what to make out of any single situation anymore.

[mf-fairy-princess]

Signs you might be a tumblr nazi stereotype-

You think you're an artist

- Literally nothing but OCs - OCs are always some kind of minority, you're literally incapable of drawing something that isn't a trendy minority figure and has 10 different fucking lables half of which aren't fucking real - SJW art stereotypes: Self harm scars, overweight, always someone of color, some wacky ass form of transgender, has some medical condition - You redraw non-minority characters as minority because aren't you just so quirky and accepting? - Flat out bad quality, evidently you spend more time coming up with ways to make the characters special instead of learning how to fucking draw them

You have an un-spoken competition with everyone else to see who can be more accommodating to minority figures.

You also have an un-spoken competition to see who can have the more fucked up or "unprivileged" life; a sick form of self-victimization. Because why would anyone ever try to improve themselves when being as disabled as possible grants you so much online authority?

You think you're incapable of being problematic and refuse to look inward, while doing some incredibly fucked up fascist shit - You're deeply racist against white people, oh but that's not a thing, right? How convenient. - Also white people have no culture yet they """appropriate""" everyone else's with every fucking breath they take. - You're openly bigoted against heterosexual or cisgender people. - Basically you think you're cute for being 1920's level of racist and bigoted, only, the roles are reversed from what they typically are, so somehow you're free from any sort of personal accountability. - Literally encourage real-life violence against police. All police, not just the incredible few who actually do harm. - You think you're cute or feel "powerful" for weaponizing your internet following to attack an individual. - Basically, in your mind, you're allowed to be the biggest piece of shit in the world because UwU.

Your vocabulary - problematic: "terfs, transmeds, ableist, queer, triggering, radfems, exclusionists, etc" - just fucking annoying: "bois, pure, uwu, #actually__, etc"

Your sense of humor is so over-played it's actually nauseating to see - Let me guess . . . frogs? - Extremely overplayed sjw brand memes - Yeah I don't know how else to put it. To quote Justice Potter Stewart "I can't define a shitty sjw meme but I know it when I see it."

Your whole-ass personal identity is completely bound up in some fucking "minority" trait you have; you cannot get over the fact that you're disabled, or black, or gay, or trans, or jewish, or muslim, and that's all you ever fucking talk about. - And because you have that trait, you are convinced that you are the absolute authority on it, and that anyone who does not have that trait is not allowed to form opinions on it (hivemind gatekeeping).

You are OBSESSED with lables either on yourself or on everyone fucking else - You put some big ass harmful lables on people who disagree with you like it's nothing. - You think you get to dictate what lables other people associate with, you're the biggest fucking gatekeeper in the universe, and your reasoning is based on dumb shit, always. - It takes me 10 minutes to count through all the lables in your bio like anyone ever once asked how many contradictory brands of gay you think you are. - You're c o n s t a n t l y advertising every quirky lil minority trait you have to a few thousand people who are either just like you, or do not give a quarter of a fuck. - You might actually be lying to yourself about a lot of the traits you associate with yourself because you're so godamn obsessed with being unique. Even though, at this point, there's so many godamn people doing the same fucking thing that nothing about you is unique anymore.

It's fucking impossible to tell what is real with you because you, as a person, are so entirely fabricated, so fake, so overdone, so basic, so fucking boring- that i can't even separate what kind of real human being you might have been at some point in your life, from the hundred pounds of tumblr "I'm so special" BULLSHIT. 

People like you genuinely make me sick, I can't stand to be around you, all I think about when you open your mouth is bloodying my knuckles on your teeth.

[shigironki]

~BIO FOR MY BULLY OC, VICTORIA CLAIRE KENNEDY~ i feel like i left too much out for my baby girl, and also changed so much of her. :B ALSO I FINALLY GOT OFF MY LAZY ASS AND MADE HER A FULL BIO, GO ME!!

Biographical Information  Name – Victoria Claire Kennedy Age - 17, sophomore year   Birthday – September 7th Astrological Sign -  virgo    Gender - female Ethnicities   Distant Descendants: none that she truly knows currently. 

Dominant Descendants: American  Physical Description  Hair Color – hazel/black hair, very wavy and curly, never has it straight Eye Color - Hazel Weight – 165 lb Height – 5′5 ft Figure/Build – Is an hour glass figure, thighs are big, is 37 C cup, curvy waist, and has slight chub onto her stomach, face is chubby as well. Distinguishing Features/Scars/ or Birthmarks – There are scars (very light; you can’t see them unless you look very close) on her right wrist that are medium sized, very light. has a scar onto her knee from when she was little. Has stretch marks on her hips that are very deep, and also on her breast, arms, and knees. She does have freckles, on her face, shoulders, and crotch-area. Tattoos: none Piercings: has two little piercings on her ears, and a nipple piercing 

Frequently Worn Jewelry: She tends to wear rings on her middle finger, does wear chokers (mainly black, but sometimes pink as well).

Typical Clothing Wear: Victoria tends to wear her school uniforms more often, but out of school she tends to wear cutesy clothes; pink shorts, “kawaii” dresses/skirts, formal shirts. She does also tend to wear one of Johnny or Gary’s shirts (ones they gave to her) With a pair of leggings. Never wears jeans unless they’re shorts.

Personal Information  

Current Living Arrangements -  Currently lives in a two story home in towards the forested areas of Bullworth. 

Traveled Territories – She currently has only traveled from Florida (last home) to Bullworth.

Hobbies -  Writing, knitting, playing games, drawing, and sleeping a lot.

Fears – Abandonment, overcrowded places, the dark, father, and abandoned places.

Religion/Beliefs – Currently has no idea.

Why?: She was raised in a non-religion family household, her parents nor grandparents never really got her into religion 

Health Behaviors  

Physical Ailments/ Disabilities/ Issues – Currently has PTSD, MDD, anxiety and Bipolar Disorder. She has has loss of feeling in her pinky on the right side of her wrist.

Addiction(s) [Sex, Drugs, Smoking, Alcohol, Other]: She currently smokes pot, and has trouble saving money and spending it on important stuff

Why?: Smoking pot helps her calm down, and it was sorta forced onto her at a young age (13 years old) and she never really tried quitting, along with money, she never fully had anything so spending it on stuff she immediately loves is “always the right thing”

Any regular medication taken? – Antidepressants, and nighttime medications.

Chronological Information  

Profession – A waitress for a local diner

Likes – Pastel clothes, cute stuff animals, animal crossing, Word Of Warcraft, G&G, and reading, along with smelling candles and perfume

Dislikes – Anyone who’s a dick, bullying, toxic people, and acne

Goals/Ambitions – Currently wants to be a nurse for a children’s hospital 

Most Instructive/Painful/Memorable Experience – Mainly her childhood; as she was bullied to the extreme, she turned off her emotions and stopped caring for others. Along with her father being put into jail, she grew with her grandparents and with her two sisters. This caused her to go into a mental meltdown, soon cursing and getting extreme mood swings, and with getting into violent situations, she grew hating everyone and everything, and never letting anymore get close to her.

Weapons/Equipment – Mainly uses her fist and feet for combat, also carries a rainbow pocket knife for protection. (She also has a Hello Kitty bat in her dorm room in case).

Personal Attributes  

Personality - Victoria’s personality can be summed up with two words; asshole, and caring person. As she grew with showing nor feeling any emotions, it takes her awhile to understand which emotion she’s currently feeling, which ends with being a bitch towards others in defense, and even being sarcastic towards those she feels are gonna toy with her or use her. She’s very hard to get used to, or even close to, but once you do, she’s a very gentle and sweet girl. She truly cares about those that have shown her love and kindness, and sometimes gets too trusting and stops caring for herself, just to love those who have shown her politeness and love. She gets carried away too much, and sometimes overreacts to stuff very quickly, but once you get close, she will truly love you for who you are and accepts you instantly.

Strengths - Quirky and very funny, knows a lot about science and math, knows how to fight, very good at talking out of sticky situations, persuasive to the maximum, and knows how to copy someone else handwriting very quickly. 

Weaknesses - Very angered easily, low self-esteem, her PTSD makes her scared of being hurt and yelled at, cannot be in the same room as a male adult, trust too easily, cries nearly about everything.

Good Habits – Tries to be there for everyone, helps when needed, charismatic, drops everything for others.

Bad Habits – Doesn’t watch her language as often, eats waay too much, gets upset and irritated instantly, makes everything into a joke about herself, (Doesn’t do this anymore) uses pain as a way to help her emotions onto herself.

Fetishes/Strange Behaviors – No fetishes, but does bite her ear bud cords, shakes her legs hard, bites her nails and sweater sleeves.

Stereotype – With wearing cute clothes and looking very sweet, she certainly does not fit the stereotype. She’s a potty mouth, bluntly tells the truth, and makes sure people know not to ever mess with her. 

Ratings on Personal Qualities  

Physical Strength: 7/10  As good as she is with fighting, she currently does feel pain a lot more than normal, as in one good punch to her and she’s down to the ground.

Attractive: 7/10  her outfits put people off instantly, but people seem to admire how she looks in a lot of pastel colors.

Honesty : 4/10 As much as she wants to tell the truth most times, she sadly can’t bring herself to tell the full truth about someone. She cares more about the person than the harsh truth.

Rule Abiding : 3/10   Lmao, rules? They don’t exist much to Victoria. She does break a lot of school rules, but makes sure to never break her home rules or grandparents.

Sociability : 8/10   She truly is the social butterfly type. Cliques don’t matter to her at all, she likes you? She’ll want to be your friend instantly.

Bullworth Academy Information  

Victoria has attended Bullworth for two years, for freshmen and now sophomore. As she dropped out of middle school to get her life more stress free, she had to repeat 8th grade in order to go into high school. And with all the troubles she had caused in Florida, Bullworth was the only academy to accept her.

Knowledgeability  

Language(s) – English, and French.

Schooling Level – Sophomore(??)

Expertise – languages

Reading Level – above average

Relationships Statuses    

Trusted Companions

Closest Friend(s) – Beatrice Trudeau

Even with Victoria not so big into math or any subject, her and Beatrice have been extremely close since Freshmen year. They both have a close friendship, and are there for each other 24/7, no matter the situation. She doesn’t like some of her best friends choices, but she makes sure she’s okay and safe and sound. ((When her and Jimmy “had a falling out” Victoria was there for her all night, helping her and making sure she was okay)).

Friend(s) – cornelius johnson, algernon papadopoulos, peanut romano, lola lombardi, petey kowalski, jimmy hopkins

* cornelius johnson: They both enjoy musicals, and science most of the time. She tends to go to him for the latest update of a musical that’s going on, and they both can giggle and cry over anything like Romeo and Juliet. They’re good friends for sure, and never really hang outside of school.

* algernon papadopoulos: As much as the two never see eye to eye, they usually have a good time during G&G, him joking about her “Edgy” characters she plays, and make jokes about the campaign. She never bothers to get to know him, as she never has the energy to handle his excitement, or usually understand what he’s talking about.

* Peanut Romano: He’s her first ever real friend when she had gotten to Bullworth, and nothing makes her happy than to hear about what Lucky or Ricky did that was stupid. She sees Peanut as a brother type of person she can trust, she tends to go to him when she feels like Johnny’s out of line, or what to do when he’s not okay. They both really enjoy each other’s company.

* Lola Lombardi: They both didn’t see eye to eye after her and Johnny broke up, and Victoria began to date him. Of course, with some small talk and hanging out, they both became good friends instantly, with Lola showing what type of clothes could get Johnny going, or helping her with make up tips. Lola is a type of friend to listen to Victoria talk about anything and just nod and agree.

* jimmy hopkins: As much as he isn’t okay with her dating both Gary and Johnny, he’s still there for her a lot of times. They have a weird friendship, at times they wouldn't’ speak to each other for weeks on end, then the next time they’re talking non stop and making a fuss in the classroom. *Pete kowalski: Victoria was really the one to never call him a dork or a loser, she actually enjoys hanging out with him, playing video games and talking about drama of the school. She does love his comebacks to Gary a lot of times, and always is there for him no matter what.

Hated Rivals

Worst Enemies – The Jocks, she truly hates them all due to constant bullying they do with the nerds.

Intolerable Students – 

* Mandy Wiles: With her constant putting down on Beatrice, she truly cannot stand Mandy for the dear life of her. The constant joking and poking fun at her best friend, it made her hate her instantly as soon as she had gotten there.

Tolerated Students – She doesn’t tolerate much people, either she likes you, dislikes you, or just doesn't talk much to you. 

Tolerated Townsfolk - No one currently

Hot Encounters  

Hinted Attractions - Gary Smith, Johnny Vincent (before they all had began to date)

Crush(es) - none

Lover(s) - Gary Smith, Johnny Vincent.  

She wasn’t fond of Gary at first, but given that they started to tolerate each other, she began to learn more and more about him, understanding where he’s coming from as she had parents who didn’t care for her, or wouldn’t try to. They became friends with benefits at first, as she was hypersexual and he wanted a stress relief, but as soon as they made it a normal thing, he began to develop a crush for her, hating it ever so much as she got into a relationship with Johnny. As she brought up that she could date both of them, with their consent of course, Johnny wasn’t okay with it at all first, as that was his girl and only his, but as she began to stress more and more about this, he caved in and gave it a try. It was all very stressful and full of fighting until Johnny began to try and get close and get used to his presence. They’re all fully comfortable now, still some annoyance from both boys here and there, but it’s easily resolved.

Ex(s) - Unless you count people who dated her for a day, then no 

Extra Information

Eating Habits

Omnivore/Carnivore/Herbivore – omnivore

Favorite Food(s): Bagel Bites

Favorite Drink(s): Soda, red bulls, smoothies, and orange juice

Disliked Food(s): peas, Brussels sprouts, and tomatoes

Disliked Drink(s): tea  

Added Information

Scent – Lavender, and/or honey

Favorite Color: black, pastel colors

Favorite Season: summer

Favorite Animal: frogs, chickens, bunnies, and cats

Favorite Music Genre: kpop, 2000′s pop, 80′s, 90′s, and death metal

[fictionfactorygames]

The Icy Slopes of PAX

As I shift this blog away from “strictly project updates” and into “personal updates that won’t fit in 250 characters” we find ourselves in interesting and somewhat archaic turf. I used to post to my LiveJournal (ha!) all the time with essays on what’s been happening in my life. Let’s resume doing that, shall we?

Last weekend I was up in Boston for PAX East.

Let me be incredibly negative up front, because I’d like to load up on the positive afterwards.

Everything about PAX was great. Everything around PAX was absolute hell. Boston in March means blizzards and sub-freezing temperatures, gale force freezing winds, and airport delays due to breakdowns and rerouting and weather issues. This is a lousy time and a lousy place to combine together for a nerd convention, and it resulted in two solid days of travel hell. Add on top of that the lack of really good hotels close to the convention center (the Westin is perpetually unavailable) and you’re gonna have a bad time. Our hotel, the Element, was a weeeeird “hostel” style hotel. It had a kitchen! …with no grocery store around for two miles. It had a foyer and a desk and a couch! …and incredibly tight walking spaces around the beds. Too much stuff we didn’t need crammed into too little space.

And while I don’t wanna appear whiny… being disabled at a large-scale public event like this sucks real bad. Everything others take for granted… the ability to use any old random chair, bed, shower, or toilet… I don’t get that. I need adaptations, tools, or helpers for every single thing I want to do. The Boston Convention Center is a complete mismash of weirdly random toilet heights, none of which are kept particularly tidy, all of which have lines and irate bastards waiting to pee. When I finally do get back to the hotel room, I can’t even go to bed on my own because those big-ass queen sized hotel beds are 65% as tall as I am and I can’t climb in. So, yeah. It’s not fun. It’s very, very not fun.

And there’s always the question of: what’s the tipping point? When does the not-fun outweigh the fun? In past years, when it was merely cold and not apocalyptic, or when we had a better hotel… that was clear. This year was more balanced, and that’s bad. I haven’t given up hope, though, and I can say for sure that there was some fun to be had.

So let’s talk about what was fun: games. Here’s everything I played and what I thought of it. My main focus was indie games, particularly arcadey ones that’ll run on my arcade cabinet. You can keep your AAA’d open world military shooters; those are a waste to demo while at PAX. Instead I went for the weird stuff.

Adult Swim Games brought out a number of heavy hitters. Kingsway, a game that plays like using a Windows 95-esque operating system? Innovative as hell. Battle Chef Brigade? Saw it on Kickstarter, didn’t think much of it at the time, but boy is it a blast to sit down and play. Katana Zero? Delicious pixelly murder. My friend Sean Baptiste was there showing off the goods, and boy howdy were they good. I kinda like this niche ASG’s carved out for themselves, curating a fine roster of indie talent that always brings something a little new and a little quirky to the table, without sacrificing quality to get there. Oh, and the best part? The dev for Battle Chef Brigade actually took his demo unit apart because the cord on the controller wasn’t long enough to reach short l’il me. I’m no journo, I’m no influencer, I’m just some schmuck and yet he still went the extra mile for disability support. That’s professionalism.

Then there’s the Visual Novel Reading Room, which was a tiny expo hall inside a smaller expo hall (the Indie Megabooth) inside the actual expo hall. Here’s where all the Renpy games landed, ranging from amusingly stereotypical otome stuff (Spirit Parade) to weird death game datesim shenanigans (Date or Die) and some things I really wish I’d played but missed (We Know The Devil). It’s not all my flavor but it’s all good research for my own future aspirations, showing what’s possible and what’s tried and true in the form. …but more on that later. Later. Patience, friends. Patience.

Other random games I found included an arcadey realtime strategy game with beautiful pixel art (Tooth and Tail), a cute Ouendan-style game for iOS with a hiphop culture vibe (Floor Kids) and a goofy litttle game about dogs barking at people to make them throw their food in the air (Russian Subway Dogs). All cute, all easily overlooked, but all worth your time. Indies are tricky, because often they’re tucked away in obscure little corners of the expo hall, overlooked by many… and I try to make a point to walk right up and play anything that has no crowd. I take business cards, I offer feedback. Good stuff.

A special shoutout goes to Fantasy Strike, an amazing fighting game. Unlike others, ‘special moves’ are single button presses, not complex combination inputs… they want to take the busywork out of fighting games, stripping them down to a pure game of positioning and timing. Skill, not execution. Why highlight it with its own paragraph in this post? ’cause I talked with one of the devs about my arcade cab and spreadsheet, and how well the game worked on it. Discussed key remapping for disability, 4:3 screen ratios, and how badly Street Fighter V got everything wrong. A good discussion and again, he didn’t have to have it with me. He chose to step away and talk shop a bit. And that’s the kind of thing that only happens at PAX.

Speaking of “only at PAX,” how about panels? I’m always impressed by how diverse and interesting the panel lineup is, every year. You’d think amidst the insanity of the Gate Which We Do Not Speak Of that there’d be a pushback on social or identity issues and gaming, but no! They’re out in full force, across a wide spectrum, and there’s something for everyone at PAX. I personally helped my friend Miellyn run a “How to PAX” panel for newbies, which was a lot of fun. The “Romance in Games” panel with Sean and Miellyn and others I knew was also great, even if a burning need to pee kinda distracted me from the crazy antics. Plenty of comedy on offer too, with the Paxamania wrestling farce for good cringey humor, the Jackbox Games panel for professional funny people being professionally funny, and of course Acquisitions Inc.’s D&D show. I could’ve watched it all on Twitch, yes, but being there in person adds a special zing to it all.

There’s plenty I didn’t get to do, for lack of time. (Sadly waiting in line for events takes a loooot of time.) I didn’t cruise the tabletop area very much. I only swooped by the artists and musicians with wares for sale… just long enough to buy a massively expensive but beautiful (to me, anyway) Galaga arcade artwork painting. The classic retro arcade was flat out missing this year, which is a shame. And there’s freeplay areas, and tournaments, and other things I missed…

…but there’s always next year. Assuming I don’t look away from Twitter for twenty minutes and all the tickets are sold, anyway. If they aren’t, I’ll see you there.