#it’s so ooc for him. he should’ve screamed and cried to the very end | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

myngxy-sue · 4 years

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Heartbreak Hurts Like Hell

I was originally going to write about Sue’s envy finally giving her the motivation to confess to Lucifer but I got so caught up with what happened beforehand that I dedicated almost three days of my life writing this. Pairings: Mammon X Yuki, Lucifer X Sue maybe Word count: 3772 words Genre: Angst, hurt, comfort Warnings: Probably OOC and my character gets slightly injured. There’s also some cursing in it. The ending is probably rushed too.

She wrote him a love note once. It wasn’t anything special. She couldn’t think of a better way to express her love for him. Perhaps it was a bit too long. Sue had a horrible habit of getting wordy when it came to her writing. But it was from the heart and she dedicated all her time and effort into writing it. She stuffed the note into her purse, assuring herself that she’d give it to Mammon when she got the chance.

Well, chances came and went, the note was forgotten about and it wasn’t until Yuki confessed to Mammon that she remembered. But it was too late. Mammon and Yuki were together.

It was a pretty generic confession, like one straight out of an anime. Their meeting place was under a cherry blossom tree of sorts. Sue happened to be there as well because she had a still life assignment for art class. Yuki had been there for quite a while, leaning on the tree, walking around it a few times and sitting right next to it, waiting. Sue had half a mind to ask what she was waiting for but she decided against it. Yuki didn’t seem to be aware that she was there too.

Suddenly, she heard footsteps, the sound of someone’s feet cutting through the grass as they ran. Sue peeped to see who it was and her heart stopped. Mammon stumbled before Yuki, scratching his head and wearing a sheepish grin on his face.Yuki helped him up.

Sue got a cold, clenching feeling inside her, somewhere between her chest and her gut. Something told her that she knew what was about to go down. She absentmindedly placed a hand on her purse, watching everything unfold.

Yuki looks down at her feet, a strong blush fading on her cheeks. She fumbled with a skirt before taking a letter out of her pocket, a pink letter bound with a red heart sticker. Sue wanted to turn away. Lord knows she desperately wanted to turn away. But she couldn’t. It was like watching a car accident take place.

Mammon’s face went blank as he eyed the letter. He takes it and promptly shoves it into an inner pocket with a smile, probably planning to show it off. They exchanged some words with each other, Yuki looking ecstatic and Mammon blushing. Then he took her in his arms and planted a kiss on her forehead.

Finally, Sue had enough.

She gathered all her things, stood up almost instantly and bolted to the school building. The clenching feeling began paining her. She tried to prevent the hot tears from accumulating but to no avail. Sue didn’t want anyone to see how hurt she was. They’d start pestering her with questions she didn’t want to answer. She slipped into class and hastily as possible and went over to her seat.

Putting all her supplies inside her desk, she rests her head down on the surface, using her arms both as support and as cover. Everyone assumed she was sleeping when she was really crying. This was all thanks to her habit of taking quick naps during school hours, particularly during breaks. She made sure to stay as still as possible and regulate her breathing.

She couldn’t believe it at first. Even if she knew all the signs, she refused to accept it at first. Yuki was a very outgoing girl despite what she tried to affirm. It was only a matter of time before she decided to make her confession. Her anxiety was never as bad as Sue’s, perhaps because she didn’t have a voice in her head constantly demeaning her. Mammon favored Yuki since she was the first between the both of them to make a pact with him.

But she didn’t get why he was only drawn to Yuki. Sue made a pact with him too and through less dubious means. She should be the one he clinged to. Leviathan forced Yuki to make a pact with Mammon for his own benefit. It didn’t make any sense.

Yuki wasn’t all that great. She was much too nosy and reckless for her own good, constantly getting herself into trouble. Sue had to save her countless times, especially from Lucifer. Yuki was childish. She cried about every little thing, she was a bit selfish, lazy, indecisive, irresponsible and maybe even stupid. Yuki was nothing but a burden.

At the same time though, Yuki was so sweet as well. Even if she was nosy, it was only because she wanted to do what she believed was right. No matter how cruel the brothers were to her, Yuki was always kind to them and believed they had some goodness to them. She was the only person who was never mean to Mammon.

Of course Mammon loved Yuki. Even with all her shortcomings, she was still better than Sue in many ways. Sue couldn’t really think about anything meaningful she had to offer. That was probably why everyone except Lucifer prefered Yuki. She was the fun, loving one. Sue was the boring mom friend.

Sue felt guilty for trying to rationalize why her friend was a bad choice. She should be happy for Yuki. She remembered all those late nights when she listened to Yuki swooning about her dream boy. Yuki saw that in Mammon so she should be glad. But no matter how hard she tried, Sue was never fully content for her friend. Her feelings for Mammon were still so strong.

Ugh, why does stuff like love and feelings have to be so difficult?

“Oi, oi! Sue-chan! Wake up!” A high-pitched voice bubbled as the owner shook Sue. “You’re not supposed to be sleeping during the day!”

Sue let out an exasperated sigh. She knew it was Yuki, not that it was hard to tell who she was to begin with. Yuki stood out for better or for worse. Reluctantly, Sue sat up, wiping her eyes in a groggy way so her friend wouldn’t suspect a thing.

“But it’s break time…” Sue grumbled.

“But Lucifer-san got mad at you for sleeping in school!” Yuki pouted, putting her hands on her hips.

“Weren’t you listening?” Sue began cleaning her glasses. They got smudged against her skin. “He was mad because I was sleeping during class. Otherwise, Lucifer has no problem with me sleeping in school.”

“Oh really?”

“Really.”

Yuki took a closer look at Sue, narrowing her eyes. Sue put back on her glasses with a straight face. Deep down, her guilt was reaching its zenith. Someone so pleasant didn’t deserve her wrath, even if it was all internal.

“Why did you wake me up anyways?” Sue huffed, acting like she didn’t see the confession.

Yuki pulled away quickly, instantly becoming bright eyed. “Oh Sue-chan, it was like a dream come true! I confessed to Mam-kun under the sakura tree and he accepted my feelings!”

And grass is green and the sky is blue! I bet you want to tell me that people die when they are killed too!

That was a stupid thought to have. Sue tapped herself on the head lightly. Yuki didn’t know she saw a good chunk of the confession. Sue knew that very well. This heartbreak was making her act weird.

“That is the sappiest thing I’ve ever heard,” Sue smiled weakly.

“But it was so magical!” Yuki swooned, spinning herself around like some sort of princess. “If you had a boyfriend, you’d understand!”

Sue felt like she got stabbed in the heart. She shouldn’t be getting so hurt over Yuki’s words but they hit a nerve. The bitter part of her was telling her that Yuki knew what was going on and she was intentionally trying to hurt her. But Sue’s rational side reminded her that even if Yuki knew, she wouldn’t be so spiteful about it. She just wanted to scream so badly.

“Why don’t you have a boyfriend, Sue-chan?” Yuki said suddenly.

Sue was taken aback. “Why would you ask something like that?”

Yuki shrugged playfully. “I just think you should’ve had a boyfriend by now. After all, you’re eighteen.”

Sue couldn’t be mad at Yuki for having that mindset. She grew up in Japan and Sue heard that there was a dating crisis there. If Yuki hadn’t been dragged to Devildom, there’d be no doubt that her parents would pressure her into finding a man to settle down with.

“I don’t know…” Sue groaned. “I don’t know anyone out there who likes me…”

“There has to be someone out there!” Yuki asserted. “There’s always someone for everyone. It’s like the saying from your country: Every…. Umm.... Every… Well… It has something to do with bread.”

“Every bread have a cheese?”

Yuki snapped her fingers. “That’s it!”

Sue chuckled softly, secretly wishing that the ground would consume her already.

“Don’t worry, Sue-chan! I will find the right man for you!” Yuki declared.

Sue gawped at Yuki before smiling and snickering, “Good luck with that.”

Yuki affirmed that she could do it before stomping off ambitiously. Sue sighed once more before putting her head down again. Now she had to deal with getting over Mammon and Yuki’s quest to match her with someone. Two things too many. And once the bell rang, Sue was going to have math with the worst teacher ever. Sue placed her hand on her purse again.

“Well, so much for that…” Sue thought to herself.

She knew at that moment that she wanted to dispose of the note. It had no use anymore and if anyone found it, she’d die of embarrassment. Throwing it in the bin was out of the question. It was so easy for someone to find it that way. Not to mention, there were some demons gutsy enough to rummage through garbage. Sue kept thinking of other ways. Even when the bell rang and classes resumed, Sue was coming up with a myriad of ideas to get rid of her note.

It went on like that until school finally finished for the day. To Sue, the day felt longer than usual. She was so desperate that she didn’t even wait for the bell. But she managed to control herself. The last thing she needed to do was piss off Lucifer.

During the walk home, Sue abruptly had an idea. She had read Little Women very recently. There were many parts of it that stuck to her. But since she wanted to dispose of her love note, the moment she thought about very much had something to do with destroying paper. She remembered when Amy burned Jo’s writing.

Of course, fire was the best way to get rid of almost anything. Paper wasn’t safe. The flames would reduce everything to ashes. All of her regrets, unrequited feelings and all would become nothing. If she played her cards wisely, it’d be like the note never existed to begin with.

She knew at once that burning the note would be the first thing she did once she returned to the House of Lamentation.

As she walked home, Sue thought about how glad she was that never bothered to give Mammon the note. She was proud that she was too shy for her own good. She had the feeling that even if she did beat Yuki to the confessing, Mammon would probably reject her. He needed someone who loved him wholly, someone who didn’t make him feel like trash. That someone, as hard as it was for Sue to admit, was Yuki.

If she saw Yuki and Mammon together, she’d turn a blind eye. She’d have to stop looking at Mammon with rose-colored lenses. He was a demon and whatever trouble he got into affected everyone to boot. Even Sue was annoyed at how Mammon would constantly get into the same problem over and over again. That and his arrogance was quite annoying.

Damn it…

Even with all that in mind, Sue’s love for Mammon was still great. She could only hope that this wouldn’t last for so long.

The walk home went without a hitch if one ignored the fact she fell into an open drain. Her ankle hurt like a bitch. In the heat of the moment, she almost used her pact to summon Mammon. Seeing him for the rest of the day was the last thing she wanted. She couldn’t summon anyone else. Making a pact with Mammon alone was a dumb idea. Well, she supposed that her ankle wasn’t that badly hurt.

Shit…

Sue rubbed her ankle once she managed to climb out. Lucifer would notice. She could pretend to her heart’s content, but he had a way of knowing. Her heart stopped. He had a way of knowing. Sue began to worry about how much he knew about her.

He probably knew about the note already. They were in the same room when she wrote it. Lucifer may have taken some cursory glances while he was working. He might’ve known that she was pretending to sleep when she was really crying. Once Lucifer even knew she had a cold before she even came to the realization. But maybe she was just over thinking. Sure, Lucifer knew many things but not everything. And what business did he have with unrequited love anyways? In all likelihood, he wouldn’t care. Lucifer had six oversized babies to look after, two humans to protect as well as copious amounts of work from Diavolo. Even if he knew, he didn’t have the time and energy to care.

Sue limped the rest of the way home, grateful that she didn’t bump into anyone she knew. She stopped at the front door. Maybe she could hide the ankle problem. It wasn’t like she didn’t try to walk normally when she hurt her foot before.

She entered.

The entrance hall was empty, much to her delight, and the fireplace was right in front of her. Sue stumbled into the living room. She didn’t even bother to check if anyone was in there.

“You’re late,” A voice said sternly.

Sue froze, jolting a bit when she accidentally applied weight to her bad leg. She turned to the source and she could feel herself trembling. Lucifer was not too far from the fireplace, lounging on a chair with a book in hand. His eyes were locked on her, that world famous scowl on his face.

“You didn’t even have any of my brothers accompany you,” Lucifer added as he stood up. He walked over to Sue. “Care to explain yourself?”

She looked up at the demon, her heart threatening to beat out of her chest. Her mouth opened slightly but not a sound came out. Lucifer let out a frustrated sigh as his face softened. He picked her up suddenly and set her down on the nearest chair.

“Even you can be troublesome…” Lucifer mumbled under his breath. He stared at her bad leg, almost cradling it in his hands. Sue didn’t know why but it was oddly comforting. It wouldn’t awaken anything within her, right?

“I fell into a drain,” Sue admitted.

Lucifer remarked, “You know you should watch your step.”

“I guess…”

“I am going to grab a few things for your ankle. I want you to stay in this exact spot. Don’t even think about getting up.”

She eyed her feet as she listened to Lucifer walking off. The sight of the swollen ankle made her cringe. Regardless, she took off her shoe and her sock to get a better look at it. It was a lot worse than she was expecting. The skin was mostly reddish with some bits of purple here and there. Sue grumbled. If she hadn’t been so caught up on the note, she would’ve watched her step.

Oh yeah, the note…

Sue pulled it out of her purse. It was folded pretty delicately. If only she could fold other things just as nicely, she thought. She opened it. Only one word in and she already couldn’t take it. She had put so much effort into it. That was one of the reasons she hated it so much. But mainly, it reminded her of the feelings she was now ashamed of. Feelings she wished that she could just get rid of on a whim. Why couldn’t it just be simple like that?

Lucifer may have told her to stay still, but she had to do what she was about to do. Sue got up, the pain from her ankle shooting up to the rest of her body. Jesus Christ, she was in pain! But she ignored it. Crumbling the note in her hands, Sue staggered over to the fireplace. The heat was quite welcoming.

She looked at the crumpled piece of paper before quite casually tossing it into the fire. Falling down to her knees, Sue watched as it was slowly consumed by the flames. A strange sense of melancholy took over. At the same time, she was strangely ecstatic. She couldn’t look away even after the note turned into ashes.

“You cannot be serious!” Lucifer exclaimed.

Sue chuckled softly as the demon paced over to her. He hoisted her up and carried her back to the chair, plopping her down on it. Lucifer gawped at her, holding her face up by the chin so she wouldn’t look away.

“I thought I’d just be able to ignore this but you've been acting strange since break,” Lucifer said. “What’s the meaning of all this?”

“Sometimes you just want to watch your regrets burn in an open fire,” Sue answered plainly. She smiled weakly but Lucifer was as stern looking as ever.

Lucifer raised a brow. “Is that all?”

“It was just a stupid story I wrote. I didn’t like it so I burned it. There’s nothing to worry about,” Sue claimed after hesitating for a moment.

The silence between them was damning. Lucifer’s eyes narrowed before he huffed.

“Sue, I believe we both know that’s a lie. I saw what you wrote and I know exactly who it's for. But if you insist on lying then please be my guest.” Sue bit her lip. She knew what she should tell him but she wasn’t sure if she wanted to. Just thinking about it brought back the pain tenfold. The tears came flooding out and her lips streamed. Lucifer was stunned.

“I feel horrible!” Sue whimpered. “Mammon likes Yuki and I don’t want to be mad at her. But I still love Mammon!”

Lucifer’s eyebrows went up ever so high in disbelief. “You have feelings for Mammon of all demons?”

“I can’t help it. I think he’s great.”

“No, he is not,” Lucifer said, shaking his head.

Sue pouted. “Don’t act like you don’t get it!”

“I really don't.”

Sue furrowed her brows, giving Lucifer the best icy stare she could manage. But she gave up and let out a sigh in defeat, pulling away from him.

“Whatever,” Sue grumbled. “That doesn’t matter right now. It’s just that… I think I might be jealous of Yuki.”

“There, there…” Lucifer comforted, patting Sue on the head. “You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself.”

“But I’m jealous of my friend.”

“You shouldn’t be jealous of Yuki. You must remember that she’s the inferior one.”

Sue paused as she gawked at Lucifer. How could she say such a thing? But once she really thought about what he said, she giggled lightly. It was pretty clear that Lucifer wasn’t being serious. He smirked a bit.

“Thank you. I’ll take it to heart,” Sue assured him.

Lucifer narrowed his eyes. “I hope you are not trying to flatter me. I was worried that this may affect your academic performance.”

“Is that all?” Sue had a blank expression.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself,” Lucifer scoffed. “Now, let’s see about that injury of yours.”

Sue watched as Lucifer tended to her ankle. The brief moment of joy from a few moments before had faded.

“I just wish I could get over it sooner,” Sue confessed.

Lucifer nodded. “I suppose such feelings are quite bothersome. But they are not easy to overcome so don’t beat yourself down if you believe it’s taking too long.”

“I wish it were that simple but…”

Lucifer looked up at the human, raising a brow.

Sue continued, “I don’t know. I just feel really bad about being jealous of Yuki.”

“Has your jealousy led to you hurting Yuki?” Lucifer inquired.

Sue shook her head.

“Have you ever thought about hurting her?”

She shook her head again.

“Then you have nothing to worry about,” Lucifer assured her. “You have a lot of self-control, something my brothers unfortunately lack.”

Sue tilted her head. “But what about you?”

Lucifer got serious real fast. “And what do you mean by that?”

Sue paused, looking at him with a blank expression again. She considered whether or not she should tell him. But before she could decide for herself, Lucifer spoke up.

“No, I don’t even want to hear it. I suggest you keep your thoughts to yourself, Sue.”

“Fine.”

She looked down at her patched up ankle, her internal pain easing up a little. Then her gaze turned to the fireplace. She wished that she could burn her feelings and move on. But all she could do was bottle them up and let it sit there until she forgot. Lucifer said she was doing a fine job, keeping it all in. That probably wasn’t the best advice. But she took it regardless.

“You should stay away from school until your ankle heals. I don’t want you hurting yourself anymore,” Lucifer advised. “I will make sure that you—”

Sue threw herself onto Lucifer all of a sudden, pulling him into an embrace. She could feel a new stream of hot tears running down her face. Lucifer eyes widened in surprise.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Lucifer bleated.

“Thank you…” Sue breathed. She hurt her ankle again.

Lucifer recovered from the shock a bit before sighing. “If you wish to thank me, just say it. This is simply unnecessary.”

Sue looked up at him and was amazed to see the demon blushing. He tried to glare at her, but it was hard to be afraid when he looked so cute. She didn’t think that she’d get him flushed so easily. Many things were running through her mind. Something told her that perhaps getting over Mammon wouldn’t be so daunting.

“You are such a strange human,” Lucifer remarked.

She shrugged. Perhaps she was. Sue began to wonder about what would happen next.

“Will you finally sit down? You’re not making this any easier.”

Well, chances came and went, the note was forgotten about and it wasn’t until Yuki confessed to Mammon that she remembered. But it was too late. Mammon and Yuki were together.

It was a pretty generic confession, like one straight out of an anime. Their meeting place was under a cherry blossom tree of sorts. Sue happened to be there as well because she had a still life assignment for art class. Yuki had been there for quite a while, leaning on the tree, walking around it a few times and sitting right next to it, waiting. Sue had half a mind to ask what she was waiting for but she decided against it. Yuki didn’t seem to be aware that she was there too.

Suddenly, she heard footsteps, the sound of someone’s feet cutting through the grass as they ran. Sue peeped to see who it was and her heart stopped. Mammon stumbled before Yuki, scratching his head and wearing a sheepish grin on his face.Yuki helped him up.

Sue got a cold, clenching feeling inside her, somewhere between her chest and her gut. Something told her that she knew what was about to go down. She absentmindedly placed a hand on her purse, watching everything unfold.

Yuki looks down at her feet, a strong blush fading on her cheeks. She fumbled with a skirt before taking a letter out of her pocket, a pink letter bound with a red heart sticker. Sue wanted to turn away. Lord knows she desperately wanted to turn away. But she couldn’t. It was like watching a car accident take place.

Mammon’s face went blank as he eyed the letter. He takes it and promptly shoves it into an inner pocket with a smile, probably planning to show it off. They exchanged some words with each other, Yuki looking ecstatic and Mammon blushing. Then he took her in his arms and planted a kiss on her forehead. Finally, Sue had enough.