#it's honestly rly insidious

[sotorubio]

alright i'm not even gonna watch a clip called anti mother's day lmao that title is all i need to know i've reached my limit of patience w this activism storyline

the thing is i think there's a general mindset of like "well if this turns out to be commentary on performative activism it's not as bad bc then it's cringy on purpose!" and while i want nothing more than some character to shut mailin's pretentious ass up i don't think we are at a point in time where tv shows can present performative activism as an issue when the shows and the general audience still thinks activism itself is an issue

i mean i already complained abt this in maya's season. like the first half of it was chanting slogans to absolutely no one in stupid costumes, ruining perfectly good clothes just to lie in them n say smth self aware like i don't think this achieves anything n the one (1) time maya actually did smth impactful n physical it was her unhingedTM breaking point. ppl already find activists either annoying n silly or dangerous criminals. your average viewer is never going to take that storyline as "oh the modern activism focuses too much on how a demonstration looks on social media n don't actually take action above meaningless catch phrases! we need to reevaluate our activism to be more impactful" they're gonna just see that and go lol exactly so many "activists" just dress as trees and stand chained to a fence aren't they silly and stupid activism is so embarrassing 😂😂 unless they're the scary crazy unhinged violent ones who 😳 who.. break the headlights of a truck 😱 activism can also be dangerous n criminal!!!!

so i rly don't see how most ppl in the real world are gonna look at mailin's actions n think it's bad bc it's performative. most ppl are just gonna think it's bad bc they think it's what genuine activism is n they find activism annoying n bad. like does she not just come off as a caricature of a "progressive" made by conservatives. having a character who nitpicks every single phrase n action of their friends is pure fuel for ppl who think it's annoying that "we can't joke abt anything these days".

and unfortunately that isn't limited to just conservatives, the druck viewer base is majorly "leftist" after all. just look at the one time druck actually covered performative activism in a way that wasn't shit. the s6 plotline between ava n mailin. ppl still overwhelmingly sided w mailin, the performative one, over ava, the one who was textually depicted as being in the right n who was actually holding her friend accountable for a reason. now tell me when it comes to performative activism it's the "performative" part ppl take an issue with... spoiler alert it's not. it's the "activism" half of the combo. ava was criticized for the exact same things as mailin is now (calling out ur friends n making them "uncomfortable", "ruining the mood" between ur friends) but she wasn't being performative at all.

performative activism only becomes an issue when u've first accepted real activism n stopped demonizing it. not to be like We Live In A Society but no activism is not the norm or generally socially acceptable. like this is the fandom that thinks shoplifting is bad if ur friend works at the store n that drinking n smoking are a sign of a toxic person. look me in the eyes n tell me the fandom cares abt activism n social issues n that's why they're so annoyed w Performative Activism 💀 it's like toooootally the performative aspect of it yup real activism would be welcomed w open arms i'm sure!

like i'm not saying mailin's activism should be portrayed as genuine either (bc it's not, if that wasn't already clear). i'm saying that it doesn't matter if they think she's being an actual activist or a performative one bc either way they're certainly Not making any points or doing anything new. i'm saying if they wanted to make a season abt activism they should not have made it abt mailin and if they wanted to make a season abt mailin well then they shouldn't have made it abt activism.

[rayshippouuchiha]

Ray, I am honestly having a rly rough time rn and have no one else to talk to so here I am. My relationship with my mom has always been shaky and lately it’s been getting so much worse. For as long as I can remember she’s done stuff that makes me uncomfortable. I don’t think it’s anything big but it happens all the time and has built up. No matter what I do she just doesn’t stop. She tries to force me wear to wear makeup, insists on picking out my clothes on the rare occasion I can leave, yells at me for not wanting to get my hair dyed because it means I’m childish, makes me wear contacts, and basically micromanages every aspect of how I look. She makes me do the most inane stuff for her to “prove I love her” and keeps ordering me around like a dog when my dad is over so he sees how well I listen to her. I am just so tired of her and how she constantly treats me like more of a dress up doll and therapist than a daughter. And we’re having money issues, can’t afford bills and wracking up debt, but she keeps spending money on the stupidest crap and won’t stop yelling at me for not acting like a living person. I don’t go out because I know we can’t afford it, I don’t dye my hair because maintenance would be an additional expense, I hate contacts and my clothes because they don’t feel like they’re mine, and I don’t act like I’m alive because I’ve been depressed for fucking years and haven’t been allowed to take medication because it would “give me autism.” I’m just so tired of it Ray. I really am and I don’t know what to do because all my other options are so much worse. In the morning I’ll probably be embarrassed about actually writing this but I just had like three panic attacks within an hour so ill ignore that for now. Sorry for unloading all this on you at 3:23 am but I rly have no one else rn and I’ve seen some similar asks so it’s probably ok? If it’s not feel free to ignore.

First of all, it's perfectly okay, I'm glad you reached out because it sounds like you really need someone to just hear you. So don't feel embarrassed.

Second of all, what you're describing is a big thing. The kind of micromanaging she's doing to you, the financial issues, the control, all of it is an insidious kind of abuse. It, like many other forms of abuse, also has a tendency to get into your head and make you feel like you're the one in the wrong.

I don't know how old you are and you said that your other options are worse so I'm guessing there's not much in the way of a support system you can reach out to? No one in the family who might be able to step in in some way? Or friends who could provide you a safe place?

The situation is obviously complicated but I want you to know that you're justified to be upset. It's not in your head and it's not your fault. She's wrong to do those kinds of things to you.

You deserve better, you deserve safety and choice over your own body, you deserve comfort.

[waveswept]

hm i just rly wish either of my parents could act like adults and take responsibility for their outbursts for once

[yarnshoes]

Ask meme! Agon and Unsui please!!

'and' u say?? Well here we go, gonna get a bit long mayhaps! Agon is A, unsui is U.

First impression

Honestly, for the both of them, i didnt rly think too much abt these guys other than the fact that unsui seems more serious/mature than agon. Like thats abt it.

Impression now

- A: even tho he Literally has a horrible, VILE personality, something revealed itself in the match against america. He was having genuine fun w hiruma. Im still struggling to find the EXACT reason of why wud it be any different than working together w someone else, like unsui perhaps. It it bcoz of how hiruma was pretty much an insane, comparatively insidious person himself? Was it the thrill of facing america, who was practically the worlds strongest? He even ended up joining saikyodai AND their football team after straight up saying 'im not interested in a world where u have to play football day and night.' I also loved the little self introspection/realization he had abt his behaviour and relationships w his peers (during the few seconds where he was abt to get annihilated by don). Maybe thats what changed him. I love little growth like that.

- U: right so im not gonna lie here, i like him better. Hes in my top 5. In the end of the series is where my love for him peaked. He no longer wants to be in his brothers shadow, and finally took what little chance he had to face him. Also him mixing in w the fun, zany guys in enma is so very important to me. He looked like he was losing actual braincells dealing w them. I wish we cudve seen him mother henning these weirdos. I hope he has fun.

Favorite moment

- A: when he took off his helmet and revealed his shaved head as a taunt and challenge to unsui. I LOVE THAT. Also when he straight up kidnapped kid n hiruma lmao.

- U: in the end of the series. He seems SO excitable its off-putting. But also endearing? Like holy shit, FINALLY u know what im saying? I JUST HOPE HE HAS FUN I HOPE HES HAPPY.🤕

Idea for a story

WHAT MAKES AGON LIKE THAT. WHAT WENT WRONG. TELL ME.

Unpopular opinion

Uhh i cant think of any... Sorry!

Favorite relationship

- A: Hiruma harharhar. This isnt abt shipping, but by god he wants to fuck hiruma so bad. I love how he wants to get under his skin so badly. Its so funny.

- U: this ones hard, he doesnt seem to have any other notable relationships other than w agon... But its not my favorite..

Favorite headcanon

- A: he joined saikyodai bc of hiruma, for whatever reason. Maybe he finally enjoyed football.

- U: him and riku ends up being the sole braincell user in enma, even tho they can feel it steadily decreasing (which is p much alr canon💀).

(ps sorry if this end up getting too long! I get carried away when talking abt characters sometimes 🤕🤕🤕)

[incessantwhine]

i rly do wonder what the fuck compelled me to reach such stupidly low weights

because honestly if i could go back to 2018 it literally isn’t worth it. not because i felt sick and not because it was physically bad for my body

but because it’s 2022 and im still hung up on that look. my life was so ugly and miserable at my worst but it’s been four years and to this day nothing ive ever done has brought me such overwhelming highs & made me feel so at home yet debilitated me so completely. I was straight up miserable and it was the only time in my life i ever felt like I was getting what i deserved. it’s not enough to have other ppl punish you. it’s not enough to chase it w/ sex or drugs or drinking or whatever. like every self destructive thing ive ever done since then has not even held a candle to waking up shivering, my body falling apart, working 10 hours absolutely starving, staying up til 4am because i took too many laxatives again, and then rinse and repeat. it was not cute or tragic or however ppl wanna romanticize their eating disorders. it was straight up disgusting. but it was empowering because i was doing it to myself and at the same time made me feel so helpless because i could not stop

i want to waste away again and just see what happens. just to see if i still could. like yes ive grown out of it in the sense i have bills to pay and that requires me to be able to physically use my body for work & i like my life the way it is now…. but god. it’s so funny when i was given freedom & choice & was directionless in life that my first instinct was to destroy myself completely and wholly. nd the fact that i still obsess over the thought of doing it again when i have everything I ever wanted…how insidious. it was 10x easier to get thru withdrawal from hard drugs & get sober. I barely even think abt stealing pills anymore. but starving? I still do it when i can. it has me in its death grips and I think it’ll be that way the rest of my life lmfao and there is no going back no matter how long u are into recovery. it’s always gonna pop up

[seashellronan]

fully agree w u on the makeup post i understood immediately what u mean like... the amount of makeup ppl feel pressured to put on even in a "basic" "everyday" look is just tragic rly... like oh im not wearing any makeup today just concealer and foundation and mascara and brows and a lipgloss like Must put it on before going anywhere we r trained to think we need to cover up everything to be like palatable to society and it just makes ppl feel horrible about what they actually look like,, ugh 😑

thanks yeah there’s a lot more to it but it’s honestly very insidious and is a dangerous cycle to fall into and one that i was a victim of for a long time and it’s just bad

[horsegxrl]

man i rly have to vent about how much tiktok has been pissing me off recently... first of all theyre all behaving like she/they pronouns r an identity and that its exclusive to afab ppl (the amount of posts ive seen that r like “she/theys heres how to look more masc haha” or smth... literally so insidious and disgusting) SECOND of all the discourse there is honestly worse than i ever experienced it here THIRD of all these mfs have NO idea how to use tw they will post a graphic video with just the words “tw” at the beginning so my traumatized ass is always like Oh Boy I Wonder What I’m In For This Time FOURTH of all theyre not funny. i dont like them theyre annoying to me get out of my comments if ur gonna regurgitate the same comments i see on every single fucking video

[mulderscully]

Love the Warrens in your sidebar thingie! Speaking of, any horror movie recs since I'm about to finish up everything in the Conjuring universe thus far?

thank you 🥰

honestly, i feel like there can't have been much that i have seen that other horror fans haven't 🤔 have you seen the insidious series? i really like them & patrick wilson is also in them.

some spanish horror films i really liked were "veronica" (really underrated imo) and the orphanage. the french netflix show "marianne" is good too. other faves of mine i think are underrepresented are "as above so below" and "the others" oh and "cam" is rly good if you haven't seen it yet. for a tv show on hulu there is a show called "light as a feather" that is spooky fun! i've been waiting for september to watch s2 lol

if anyone got more recs reply pls 👇🏼

[f-nodragonart]

ok wait I have one more rant abt American Dragon and I swear I’m done, but the whole concept of a ‘leader’ dragon for every country is very.... strange to me

like ok, suspension of disbelief for vague hand-wavey magic, or the existence of magical creatures, etc. fine fine. but the whole PREMISE of the show is built around the concept of an American Dragon-- yet that concept is so incredibly, frustratingly vague. like I said in my original review, I’m willing to excuse a lot for a simple kid’s show that isn’t looking to worldbuild super deeply, but the main premise at the VERY least should have SOME planning behind it

for one, the physical size and population distribution of each country varies WILDLY across the globe, it’s honestly stupid to assign the same number of ‘leader’ dragons (one) to each, and expect each dragon to serve their respective country to the same degree of competence. the US is a fuckin MASSIVE country w/ two states disconnected from the mainland, and SEVERAL different biomes that have contributed to diverse sets of populations (which would likely be reflected among magical creatures as well, culturally and biologically-speaking). it’s ridiculous to expect ONE dragon to serve, represent, and protect ALL those populations

and the thing is, Jake DOESN’T do that! he’s a New York Dragon at best. the only times I remember him helping out w/ magical emergencies out-of-state are when he’s traveling for personal reasons (like visiting family) or when he’s tending to dragon council business, in which case most dragons across the world are gathering there too (not to mention these instances are generally out-of-country)

having a ‘leader’ dragon assigned to a bio/cultural region without even bothering with human borders would make FAR more sense (esp since the dragons don’t even wanna bother w/ the human world anyways, so why are they assigning things based on human constructs??). hell, there could even still be dragons representing larger areas too, so long as it was established that they’re the more broad-scope representatives that must regularly convene with the dragon representatives of the smaller regions under their jurisdiction. this would assure that each dragon is truly an intimate member of the communities they’re assigned to, rather than some outsider intruding on important matters that they simply can’t understand w/o cultural context. this especially makes sense if we assume that dragon forms are magical/psychological projections of the cultural society that a given dragon is raised in, rather than a *strictly* biological body whose traits are genetically inherited (tho like I said in my main review, I’m rly doubtful of that actually being canon to the show...)

now, it would admittedly be p cool if the show took the time to pull Jake across the nation to explore different cultural/ecological regions and the magical creatures within. but that’s expecting a lot from a show that only establishes that Jake is part-Chinese on the most shallow of levels, and fails to explore Chinese culture in any intimate manner beyond ONE(1) episode about the Chinese new year. like, the bar is on the ground, here

and even if some attention had been paid to America’s diverse cultural settings, I’d still be skeptical of Jake being able to handle the whole nation on his own. hell, I’m skeptical of an ADULT dragon being able to handle a nation as huge as the US, much less a tween handling the whole thing. I already take huge issue w/ kid’s shows framing dangerous, mature situations as “normal” responsibilities for children to encounter and just “get over”, as if they’re as commonplace and simple as like, studying for class. so every time Jake is reprimanded for not managing his time properly when he’s running on 10 min of sleep after facing off against angry trolls, or trying to take some free time for himself when he’s missed out on every other chance at a normal middle school milestone, I genuinely seethe w/ rage

at least w/ most other kid’s shows there’s some explanation I can accept for the main character having to go through that kinda stress. like w/ Danny Phantom, Danny unfortunately goes thru a freak accident, and he can’t tell his ghost-hunting parents abt it for fear that they might tear him apart for science or misguided protection, and he decides on his own that he has some responsibility to use his powers for active good (tho DP still pulls the “ghost-fighting is just like balancing school and a social life!” bullshit that I HATE..). or w/ Steven Universe, all this responsibility was thrust on Steven by adults who didn’t understand the consequences of their actions or had no other choice, and Steven’s currently dealing w/ the massive emotional fallout of having his childhood stolen from him

but with American Dragon, like... this shit is PLANNED. the council carefully CHOOSES the dragon for each nation-- these adults have a RESPONSIBILITY to both a whole WORLD of magical creatures AND their dragon subordinates to choose capable, mature dragons to lead the magical world. and for some reason they decide that this responsibility should fall on the shoulders of LITERAL CHILDREN?? who was the previous American Dragon? where the hell are they now? (Neopuff pointed out to me that Jake is in fact the first AD, which is even even more suspect than before! what!!) even if Jake is chosen to be a potential future AD, why does he have to take on that full responsibility now?? why isn’t a seasoned adult taking care of the bulk of responsibilities until Jake grows up??? like I get that children’s power fantasies hit different when ur an adult b/c u can recognize what responsibilities a child shouldn’t have to deal with-- I GET that it’s good to let children explore mature responsibilities in fiction, I’m not arguing that. but these responsibilities should at LEAST make sense in-context, and NO adult should have knowingly thrust these duties on literal children w/o some DAMN good explanation for why they literally CAN’T assign dragon duties to adults. not to mention that the whole, “you’re selfish and need to learn better time management skills,” thing is such an insidious message to direct at kids who should literally only be expected to... be kids? I’m SO fucking mad abt this!!!

and don’t even get me STARTED on the fact that Jake is being trained by the Chinese Dragon, and Haley by the Korean Dragon. like, again, the show establishes that there’s only one ‘leader’ dragon for every nation, and that Lao Shi and Sun are the current dragons of their respective countries-- they haven’t resigned, as far as we know. so like, what happened to China and Korea (and now that I think abt it, which Korea??)? they just don’t have dragon protectors? fuck them, I guess, they’re on their own now? b/c training American dragons is so much more important than protecting their own countries? b/c a Chinese and Korean dragon somehow have better knowledge of American magical communities than the dragons that have actually been living there and presumably been serving those communities for decades (and b/c every Asian country is apparently interchangeable, so a Korean dragon is obviously perfectly fit to understand the cultural background of part-Chinese dragons)? hello???

now I AM at least willing to consider that perhaps the dragon council runs on enough shallow bureaucracy that their predecessors just arbitrarily decided to assign a single, young dragon to each country, and the current council is too stubborn to change that tradition even in the face of its clear problems. like, actual real-life political systems are absolutely fucked, so it tracks that a fantasy political system could be similarly broken. this doesn’t explain all the fuckshit, but it might at least explain some of the fuckshit. BUT none of these problems are ever brought up in the show, so we have to assume that they are somehow, canonically......... not actually problems..... ugh.............

and none of this even BEGINS to tackle the weird dragon monarchy over all magical-kind. like this obviously isn’t exclusive to AD, u see this sorta bloodline-bound authority thing in a LOT of western fantasy media. but the fact that the dragon council seems so utterly incompetent when u pick apart all the above issues, I’m just sitting here like... how have the trolls/elves/merfolk/etc. not guillotined y’all yet? lmfao

-Mod Spiral

[greenfinches]

Hi, I know this is sort of out of the blue but I really like how you write/ view these characters, and I was wondering what you think Dennis Finds His Pride would look like if they made it an episode?

hey!! this got long so uh. sorry abt that. tw for discussion of csa

i think my ideal dfhp ep….wouldn’t b focused on his sexuality. i’m surprising myself by typing that but it’s true. the whole message of finds his pride - mac finally, truly seeing himself for who he really is - i want that for dennis, but i want to see it explored through a different lens. dennis definitely has a turbulent relationship w his sexuality but i think ultimately that’s not what’s holding him back.

like…….ok i’m figuring this all out as i go, bear with me: mac was hurting bc he was closeted?? but i think maybe dennis is the other way around. he’s closeted bc he’s hurting. and the source of that hurt is the fact that he hasn’t accepted that he was assaulted. he’s been living in denial for decades and his issues have snowballed accordingly.

dennis will stay stuck in place until he starts to heal from what happened to him. the way sexual assault can warp u and ur understanding of urself is so fucking insidious - i don’t think dennis knows who he is at all. he’s aware of that, on some level (“i have this giant, gaping hole inside of me. and i’m always trying to fill it with something”) but rather than try to heal it, he tries to fill it in.

the trouble with that approach is that, naturally, nothing is going to fit. not sex, not a persona, not a relationship - none of those things can heal trauma. i think dennis started to realise that at the end of s12. s12 dennis…….like his mental state is the clearest it’s ever been, he’s calm, he’s letting himself feel things again. he realises that the hole is still there. he tricked himself into thinking it was gone, and it wasn’t. that scares the shit out of him so he bolts. who the fuck knows what went down in nd, but i think it would be ooc for dennis to put all his cards on the table at once. i think he’s far more likely to tell everyone the same lie than he is to tell them all the same truth, if that makes sense. s13 is a rly strong example of that behaviour, bc s13 dennis literally feels like he’s playing a caricature of himself. it’s like he wrote down a “things ppl expect of me” list, got the personality traits all wrong bc of his self esteem issues, then performed them dialled up to 11. it feels like he’s emulating the person he believes the gang sees him as.

ig the groundwork for my ideal dfhp episode would be dennis acknowledging what he went thru at 14. i think that would open so many doors for him, ik i sound corny but i’m being 100% honest - dennis coming out, dennis being more like the easygoing loves-his-friends idiot he was in the early seasons, dennis having big feelings again - all of those things could happen feasibly in canon, i think, but he’d have to accept himself first. he’d have to.

honestly idk what it would look like. it would have to have the same kind of reverence that mfhp had. he’d need to be honest. there would need to be a fuckton of nuance - dennis is deeply entrenched in the cycle of abuse, and that’s a difficult line to walk but i think sunny could do it. i want them to do it bc nobody’s ever rly done it before, and i think dennis is the perfect character for it. idk if it was intentional (i like to hope it was) but to me one way of reading dennis is as a commentary on the cycle of abuse, the aftermath of csa, what can happen when abused kids slip through the cracks and are forced to grow up without therapy or support. i could scream abt this for hours but this post is long enough as it is so i’m gonna leave it there.

one last thing before i shut up: i wouldnt want him to feel fixed all at once in one episode. mfhp felt like mac pushing through all the anguish and hurt and finally starting the healing process - i want dennis to ‘start’ something. he doesn’t have to figure it out all at once. i literally just want him to open the door and say to himself, “this is what happened to me and it is still hurting.” even admitting that would b a strong start. i don’t want him to be redeemed so much as i want him to self destruct less - dennis being stupid and chaotic and terrible is integral to his character, yk? but i think an exploration of why dennis is the way he is, and showing him acknowledging his trauma…….yeah. i want that

[jawnkeets]

I need some book recommendations, please! Anything intense and dark. I want them to take my mind on a crazy ride. xx

hi! ok so the following is a selection of my fav works of literature (or works that i have found particularly thought-provoking) relating to intensity and darkness, delving into the bizarre, perverse, grimly humorous, subversive, illuminating, horrifying, unsettling, and just plain weird:

the pit and the pendulum and the mask of the red death, edgar allan poe (torture and plague!) 

the theatre and its double, antonin artaud and biography antonin artaud: blows and bombs, stephen barber (desperately intense and original. massively underrated in the english-speaking world imo despite exerting a huge influence on contemporary theatre and the arts more generally)  

the strange case of dr jekyll and mr hyde and the body snatchers, robert louis stevenson (stevenson bringing good old victorian repression/ secrecy/ duality/ cover-of-darkness criminality etc to the table, we all love it) 

on evil, terry eagleton (if ur interested in a critical approach/ perspective)

the metamorphosis and the trial, franz kafka (the word kafkaesque may often be pretentiously sprinkled into conversation but his work is actually rly good lol) 

the rime of the ancient mariner and kubla khan, samuel taylor coleridge (context surrounding kubla khan as a drug-fuelled vision and its fragmentary nature is v interesting - see debate surrounding the ‘person from porlock’)

stone animals, kelly link (kindly recommended to me by @karmictard! i loved this short story it was so insidiously unsettling) 

bacchae, euripides (bit of dionysian irrationality, it’s a classic)

the waste land, t. s. eliot (turning up the unreality dial to max)

waiting for godot, samuel beckett (so funny in a despair-inducing kind of way)

king lear, hamlet and titus andronicus, william shakespeare (gruesome/ dark in places, the comedy/ foolery rly adds to the plays also and makes u rethink its relationship to the tragic/ serious, particularly in hamlet. additionally othello is fascinating and fits your criteria of intense and dark when examined with issues of godhood, free will and the self in mind - disturbing questions are raised…)

jerusalem, jez butterworth (if ur interested in topsvy turvy stuff and the interplay between crudeness and profundity, wildness and bathos, this darkly comic anarchic drama may be for you. it’s my fav 21st cent work of literature like honestly it’s amazing)

i am waiting for the right time to read the great god pan as well (and more of arthur machen’s stories) - so whilst i can’t recommend this just yet, i will report back.

hope this helps!! 

[dragimal]

thoughts on Voltron s7

this is prolly old hat by now, but I still wanna throw my two cents to the wind. this is gonna get very rambly, and I’m gonna derail A LOT to air out other grievances I have w/ the show/fandom. a rant like this has been a long time coming-- the reception to s7 only pushed me to write this now. so beware, I guess. also I’m not rly tryin to Start Shit, so I’m slottin’ this under the cut

I think I should start at the beginning: I didn’t like Voltron for the first 3 seasons.

it was perfectly passable, but not.... exactly the kinda thrilling saga Tumblr made it out to be. all the hype put me under the impression that VLD was a deeply emotional/character-driven story much like ATLA-- I was sorely disappointed to find this wasn’t the case. instead, I found a typical space-mecha plot populated by pretty tropey characters-- certainly not bad, but not all that emotionally gripping either 

I actually grew p bitter over Voltron’s particular brand of popularity-- mainly the comparisons to ATLA, as if VLD was anywhere as deep and clever. I wasn’t mad that it was popular so much as it seemed popular for the wrong reasons

now I’m not saying that enjoying VLD is “childish” or whatever, I’m just saying that comparing VLD to ATLA is p damn insulting, imo. ATLA has a level of depth in plot, worldbuilding, themes, character arcs/interactions, etc. that’s incredibly impressive-- esp for a kid’s show. u just don’t get that depth from VLD-- and honestly, that’s just fine! I know I’m singing ATLA’s praises to the heavens here, but I’m also kinda sick of Tumblr trying to compare every damn thing to ATLA, as if every piece of media HAS to be another ATLA to be worthy of praise (like the whole “Zuko redemption arc” thing has been taken wayyyyy too far when critiquing villains...)

ATLA and VLD aren’t trying to accomplish the same things, so it’s kinda shitty to place those kinda expectations on the creators of VLD when they’re trying to do their own thing? like, I don’t expect Osomatsu-san-- a very stupid show I deeply adore-- to be the next FMA just b/c both shows have a focus on brotherly bonds; they’re clearly two separate things that I can enjoy for different reasons

anyways, to cut that ramble short, VLD just wasn’t my thing when I first started it. I’m not big on mechas, and I typically prefer pointed storylines over ‘adventure-of-the-week’ setups. not that VLD doesn’t have some underlying plot for the first couple seasons, but it takes a while to get past random villain fights and/or adventures every ep and condense it into a continuous plot thread. some ppl like that kinda thing, I just don’t. the reason I continued to watch it-- despite my misgivings-- is b/c I like watching things with friends. my bf has always liked VLD and wanted me to see it, so I enjoyed watching it with our audience of two

I’m glad this setup forced me to continue watching, or else I would have never reached the turning point-- episode 33 (s3): “The Legend Begins”

this was the point at which my feelings switched from “eh” to “oh... OH. OH SHIT.” I’d finally started to get INVESTED. I finally began to develop real attachments to the characters! I was finally eager to learn what happened next; finally perched at the edge of my seat in anticipation! VLD had finally found its footing and solidified its unique voice, and I couldn’t have been more proud!

yet, what did I hear from the fandom as this narrative transition began?

“the show has gone downhill, and it’s only getting worse!″, "[x] characters aren’t developing anymore” and/or “the showrunners HATE [x] character!”, etc. etc.

though I suppose it’s a bit simplistic to say the fandom as a whole thought this way; in reality, just a vocal subset of the fandom thought-- and continues to think-- this way

yes, patient reader, this is one of those conversations. because we really can’t have a proper fandom discussion anymore w/o getting into those topics, can we? god, if only

so I’ll stop beating around the bush: antis fucking hate the new seasons, mainly because:

1) a lot of antis love Lance for some reason? antis don’t like the fact that Lance isn’t, like, the entire damn focus of the show (calls for “black paladin Lance” galore....), so they don’t like the fact that other main characters play significant roles in the show. this has devolved into unfounded critique of Lance’s character development in the last few seasons, when in reality Lance has gotten SIGNIFICANT development from s4 onward (just like most every other character..). he’s gotten more confidant in his abilities and is less defensive of his character, he’s more cooperative w/ his teammates, and he’s learned to (usually) recognize when a situation requires a serious approach rather than nonchalance. like, as someone who doesn’t much like Lance, I think it says something that my feelings have advanced from, “jesus I can’t stand this guy, can he shut up for one goddamn second,” to, “nice, Lance is mostly bearable and sometimes charming, now.” this point bleeds into the next point--

2) a lot of antis LOVE klance-- or the ship Keith/Lance, for any random readers that don’t know the Voltron fandom. klantis-- as these particular antis have been dubbed-- hate ANY semblance of connection either of these characters have w/ other characters, b/c it threatens klance. Keith and Lance both canonically have strong connections to other specific characters (Keith to Shiro, and Lance to Allura), so these ships are the most threatening to klance

now, all stans/shippers have fans that are a bit too defensive, sure. I’m not saying that sheiths (Shiro/Keith shippers) or any other stans/shippers in VLD aren’t ever at fault. but antis always ALWAYS bring an insidious dimension to fandom wank in the form of-- for lack of a better term-- “social justice posturing”

I’m not claiming that discussions abt representation and sj issues in fandom aren’t important, but antis always take these sensitive issues and simply use them as ammo in what are typically giant ship wars. there’s no nuance, no room for different interpretations-- only black/white divisions of what is “valid”/”canon”/”acceptable”, which are then strategically warped in favor of what the antis of that particular fandom favor (which, in the case of VLD, is Lance/klance)

of course, not ALL VLD antis are specifically out to discredit just one ship, as evidenced by the proliferation anti-shaladins (those against shippers of Shiro w/ ANY of the paladins). BUT this is exactly where anti tactics are utilized in full-force, and where this petty ship war further devolves:

antis fucking HATE Shiro.

Shiro poses the biggest threat to klance (at least in terms of fandom, b/c Allura canonically poses a much bigger threat tbh), thus antis have steadily built a “case” against Shiro not only as a bad partner to Keith, but as a bad character in general. the more “reasonable” antis claim things like, “Shiro’s too mentally ‘broken’ to be with anyone!” “Shiro’s too old to be with anyone, he’s practically a grandpa!” and, “Shiro’s too much of a parental/guardian figure to consider any paladins as potential partners,” while more extreme antis have claimed that Shiro literally IS a pedophile, or straight-up dangerous due to his mental hang-ups

there is clearly a lot wrong here both canon-wise (Shiro has shown 0% confirmable attraction to any character in canon; everyone’s actual ages are vague at best, thus there are no exact age gaps to measure, etc.) and in terms of plain ethics (callin a guy w/ ptsd “too broken” fuckin WHAT). but this is what antis have devolved to-- dismissing Shiro’s mutual connections to his fellow paladins at best, then accusing him of straight-up horrific shit at worst. all in the name of protecting a ship. boy howdy.

(*SIDENOTE* I hypothesize that Allura doesn’t get nearly the same level of hate b/c mlm ships are favored in fandom, thus there are more sheith shippers than allurance (Allura/Lance) shippers to oppose klance. she may also be protected by Tumblr’s over-the-top glamorizing of any and every female character, but that’s a rlyyyy weird discussion that’s hard to quickly/accurately dissect, so I’ll just leave that particular hypothesis to the side..)

anyways, patient reader, let us return this tangent back to the original point: the general criticisms directed at s4 and onward. how do antis relate to this?

well, it’s real fuckin convenient that ppl suddenly started recognizing VLD’s writing/plot/etc. flaws when the show wasn’t catering quite AS much to Lance, or Lance/Keith interactions. real fuckin convenient ppl suddenly started criticizing Shiro as a character when said character’s relationship w/ Keith began to gain more focus and development. real fuckin convenient that ppl are finally recognizing that VLD isn’t as great as ATLA, when the last few seasons have gotten PRETTY DAMN CLOSE to ATLA’s level of emotional depth

so I’m bitter abt Voltron again. but rather than being bitter abt VLD being popular for the wrong reasons, I’m bitter that VLD’s flaws are finally being recognized for the wrong fucking reasons

and this is where it gets real fucking dangerous, b/c antis are dangerously persuasive to the general fandom public

since antis use sj language as ammunition for petty-ass shit, they can easily gain the attention of... god, I hate that I have to unironically use this term, but Tumblr “normies”. I literally have no better, simple term to describe somebody on Tumblr who hasn’t watched VLD (or simply hasn’t engaged in the fandom in a significant way), so please just roll w/ me here, for my own sanity. so Tumblr normies-- as those on Tumblr are prone to-- are vigilant in keeping up w/ sj issues across the board. this is good! it’s good to be aware of and critical of the content we consume..... until it’s. not.

I’m not the first to say that Tumblr has a very warped, very dangerous approach to sj activism. much like full-on antis, there is so much black/white thinking, lack of nuance, swift and unforgiving retribution for even slightly differing opinions, etc etc. it’s why so many ppl on Tumblr even ARE antis, b/c it’s rly just the fandom-offshoot of this mentality

but even beyond the most extreme “activists” of tumblr, anti’s sj language is dangerously appealing to even the chill normies-- nobody WANTS to support dangerous relationships or bad representation, after all! so they latch onto that rhetoric too, b/c when normies see antis' (usually unfounded) criticisms thrown around, they don’t know the show/fandom well enough to be able to verify those criticisms. and like, I get the appeal of it-- I’ve def made similar mistakes w/ unfamiliar fandoms as well, b/c I want to support a cause that seems just. it’s p natural to want to align w/ what we perceive as a just cause, esp when convinced by a persuasive speaker

thus, antis have gained a significant following of normies due to the simple fact that Tumblr normies DO care abt sj issues, but they DON’T care enough to research the show themselves to see what’s what

so, let me quickly recap the stage I’ve set for you here:

1) the fandom in general has given Voltron more credit than is due, and has subsequently placed ridiculous expectations on it. this has given Tumblr normies a false impression of VLD and its standards

2) antis are SUPREMELY protective of klance (and Lance in general), and have thrown around WILD accusations at any ships that threaten it, leading to--

3) antis throwing Shiro under the bus time and fucking time again.

4) by abusing sj language/tactics, antis appeal to Tumblr normies’ sense of duty, thus gain their approval in ganging up on whatever antis deem unjust in VLD-- whether it’s actually valid or not

so fuckin forgive me for being a bit skeptical when I heard rumors of “bury your gays” in Voltron from antis/normies, when these same ppl are actively throwing around accusations of pedophilia in the name of goddamn shipping

but I’ll fully admit, I passed judgement on this criticism a bit too quick, considering I hadn’t even seen the new season yet. it’s never good to blindly accept opinions purely on the basis that they bolster ur own assumptions, and I’m not immune to that charming trap (tho thankfully I’m not typically a vocal member fandom, so I was mostly just nodding along w/ my fellow shieths asdfg)

so finally, dear reader, we reach the actual point of this post: after seeing s7 for myself, what even ARE my opinions on it?

well. the handling of Adam and his relationship to Shiro............... wasn’t great. it was pretty fuckin terrible, actually. despite all I’ve said against antis, I agree w/ their general view that Adam’s relationship w/ Shiro (and his subsequent death) was shoddy, underdeveloped, and disrespectful to some degree. I’m personally not sure it’s worth the title of “bury your gays” for several different reasons, but I wouldn’t fault someone for calling it that, b/c there are definitely several other reasons that reinforce that trope. it’s worth discussing, and definitely worth voicing criticisms towards, esp in terms of Dreamworks’ “lgbt rep” advertising before s7′s release (which was absolutely scummy, there’s just no other word for it)

so if I agree w/ antis’ basal complaints in this instance, then why the hell am I even talking abt this? why am I putting so much effort into dissecting the fandom, only to essentially reach the same conclusion as those I fundamentally disagree with?

well, I suppose it’s all abt the framing.

I’m not gonna link the post b/c, again, I Don’t Wanna Start Shit, but most of y’all have prolly seen that one post that breaks down the history of the “bury your gays” trope, and how it was possibly utilized in VLD. it’s a p good argument in that respect-- I think it hits the main points of how/why Adam and his relationship w/ Shiro was just plain Bad

and to the untrained “normie” eye, that’s all it is. however, there is a cryptic framing present that reinforces anti talking points, which only someone involved in the fandom would recognize. 

(*SIDENOTE* I don’t mean to pick on SPECIFICALLY this post, I just think it’s a nice rundown of a few of the main rhetorical tactics used by antis. it’s certainly not a unique post in the fandom, but merely a good example of this brand of posts)

for one, this post forces an emotional distance between Shiro and the paladins. this post INSISTS that Shiro can ONLY be interpreted as a guardian character that can’t relate to the other paladins in any significant way due to age gaps and traumatic experience. THUS, according to antis, Adam was the only person that Shiro could have intimately discussed his problems w/ b/c they’re the same age and have a history. Adam's death removed this potential confidante, thus leaving Shiro to sort out his issues alone

while I agree that it would have been nice to see Shiro chat w/ a new character he has a history with (esp considering we rly haven’t gotten much backstory on Shiro yet), so much of this argument is simply false

I’ve already mentioned the bullshit that is the vague age gaps, but even if we were to take them into account, there ARE characters who are assumedly at or over Shiro’s age: Coran and Allura. and yeah, Coran is prolly not the best choice in terms of real emotional connection, but Allura? she could prolly fuckin relate. Shiro’s had his body and autonomy violently violated by the Galra, to the point that his original body is now destroyed; Allura has had her culture and people violently violated by the Galra, to the point the her original planet/culture is now destroyed. Shiro is/was a leader to the paladins, and takes their collective failures to heart as his personal failures to his team; Allura is a literal princess to her people, and takes their downfall as a personal reflection of her lack of ability to protect them. their situations obviously shouldn’t be 1:1 conflated, but to say they have no points of relation here is fuckin insulting

but since age gaps like this mean JACK SHIT when it comes simply developing emotional connections and mutual respect, we don’t even need to go so far as to match ages! this is evidenced by actual intimate interactions Shiro has had with the paladins!

the first one that comes to mind even involves antis’ favorite-- Lance! episode 45 (s5): “The White Lion” involved a moment where Shiro approached Lance on his own and opened up abt his mental health, saying he, “didn’t feel like himself.” now it could be argued that this was Shiro’s clone-- not Actual Shiro-- approaching Lance for help. tho I firmly believe that are still true parts of Shiro present in his clone, even if he’s not fully there. the clone is still protective of his team (before his mind is COMPLETELY hijacked, of course), and I believe any connections/loyalty/trust Shiro has towards the paladins is still true for the clone (even if this can, once again, be forcibly overridden). this moment is Shiro-- the part of Actual Shiro that’s present in his clone-- approaching a fellow teammate for help. of course, Lance doesn’t know exactly what to do in this situation, but he at least stays w/ Shiro for support

and then of course there are all the great moments Shiro has w/ Keith that antis want to forget abt. moments where Keith has laid down his health and safety for Shiro, moments where Keith has barred his soul to Shiro, moments where Keith has done everything in his power to reach out to a hurt and struggling Shiro.  moments where Keith has made it ABUNDANTLY fucking clear that he’s here to the bitter end, that he’ll NEVER give up on Shiro. it literally doesn’t fucking matter if u interpret these scenes as platonic or romantic, b/c the fact of the matter is that Shiro and Keith care DEEPLY abt each other in some shape or form. disregarding that is forcibly ignorant. also, we've now confirmed that Keith and Shiro do have a HISTORY back at the Garrison together before all this Voltron nonsense started (even if it isn’t necessarily a romantic history), so Keith also has that leg up

the subtle framing of Shiro as STRICTLY a “guardian” character is also a classic anti tactic, as it implies a sort of pseudo-pedophilic undertone to any Shiro/paladin ships, which is just.... gross and dishonest. yes, he’s canonically a leader to the paladins, and oftentimes takes on a guardian-type role, but once again, he also canonically opens up to other paladins on a mutually respectful/intimate level. there’s nothing in canon that would strictly suggest he’s ONLY a guardian figure-- “space dad” is a fandom interpretation in the same way that framing him as Keith’s lover is a fandom interpretation. neither is more or less 'canon', and it's petty to suggest otherwise

another weird point in that post is the insistence that Shiro is a “tragic gay character”, which is just..... not fucking true, first of all. he’s definitely suffered the most out of any main character, I agree, but he’s GETTING THROUGH IT. he’s been pulled through it by the paladins, and he’s learning to use his own strength to pull through as well. he’s so incredibly fuckin strong and it’s a fuckin shame that ppl don’t see how inspirational he is to those that may be struggling emotionally. plus, he's never suffered BECAUSE he's gay, nor has he ever had a damn HINT of queer-coding until Adam was shoehorned in (which is its own separate problem w/ the show, but it's not a "tragic gay" problem)

but beyond all that is an even more subtle insistence that Shiro has always been a beloved character to ALL in the fandom. antis’ underlying implication that, “hey normies, Shiro-- our beloved Space Dad-- has been given the shit end of the stick, and u should be mad abt it too!” 

as if antis haven’t spent the last several years shitting on Shiro at every turn, saying he’s got “scrambled egg brains” b/c of his ptsd, and other horrific shit. the fact that they can turn around to “defend Shiro’s honor” now that he’s *confirmed queer* (and, initially, confirmed less of a threat to klance due to Adam) and STILL be taken seriously is goddamn terrifying 

like I am literally seeing posts like this-- IN 20FUCKIN18-- that normies are taking at face value and reinforcing:

to any normies reading this: SHIRO AND KEITH AREN'T FUCKING RELATED!! racist antis insist that they have to be related b/c they're both Asian and the second half of their last names (Shirogane and Kogane, respectively) are similar. I'm literally so baffled over how this tactic is ever taken seriously, but who fuckin knows I guess. and if antis are trying to make a case for adoptive siblings, Keith canonically met Shiro by at LEAST his early/mid teens-- LONGGGG past the developmental age of youth where he might latch onto another person as a strictly non-romanceable relative, so. No. fandom is free to interpret Keith and Shiro’s relationship as brotherly, but to say that that is the STRICT and true 'canon' interpretation of their relationship is, once again, fuckin petty and dishonest

just. how fuckin DARE antis act like they give a SINGLE goddamn shit abt Shiro’s emotional needs and trauma after pullin this shit. how fuckin DARE antis misuse real sj issues to appeal to the lowest common denominator in normies, looking for fodder to fuel the flames of hate

so, if I may be so bold as to utilize one of antis' many battlecrys: this discussion does not exist in a vacuum. Adam's shoehorned relationship w/ Shiro is shitty and worth criticism, absolutely. but brushing aside the fandom history driving the resulting uproar-- as if ship wars aren't HUGELY influencing this backlash-- is SUPREMELY fuckin ignorant

antis latched onto Adam HARD when he was first announced, despite all the signs he'd be a side character at best, that he was stated clearly to be Shiro's ex, and having no context for his personality. Adam was antis' newest shield to their ship-- somebody to take Shiro's romantic potential away from Keith, thus leaving Keith open to Lance. Adam's death eliminated that shield, leaving antis reeling-- they couldn't just jump right back into hating Shiro after having showered his newly-christened gay ass w/ praise for all of the Tumblr normies to see. so, their anger was tactically redirected towards Adam's development

there is nothing shocking abt any of this tbh. all antis is the same, and they're all bitter assholes that are completely willing to abuse real sj issues for their own goals. plain and simple.

I don't rly have a proper ending for this. I'll just say that I like s7 a helluva lot, and Adam’s shitty development doesn’t rly phase me? not everyone feels that way, which is valid, I just don’t particularly give a shit abt Adam. I have hope for s8-- esp in terms of potential development for Shiro. since Shiro got such heavy focus in s6, it makes sense that he was pushed to the sidelines a bit this season to leave room for the other characters (Keith, Lance, Commander Holt + Earth stuff in general, etc.) to develop and shine. I've heard rumors that Adam did in fact have more development that was cut, which I'm honestly willing to believe b/c the development we got felt cut short, rather than simply planned that sparsely in the first place. my hope is that s8 will return some focus to Shiro, and possibly slot in some of these cut scenes to bolster a better backstory to their relationship? pure speculation tho, and it doesn't rly excuse Adam's treatment in s7, but it's worth considering

before I completely end off here, I just want to go on one last FINAL tangent: I'm so damn disappointed that everyone is sleeping on kexa (Keith/Acxa)??? if anything it poses MUCH more canon threat to BOTH klance and sheith purely b/c it's 'safely hetero' and b/c the show itself has hinted at potential feelings there (“She’s always been sweet on that one with the flippity hair,” and “Oh look Acxa, it’s your favorite paladin~”). like I haven't seen antis OR sheiths even mention this, it's baffling. the fact that it'll prolly be canon is bittersweet for me: bitter b/c DAMN I love sheith, and sweet b/c damn.... I'm rly diggin kexa....

so the moral of this post is: blease appreciate Keith's beautiful goth gf, she deserves love

thank u and goodbye

[incendavery]

gosh, thank you! that is so sweet??? I hope you (and any other of my followers who celebrate!) have/had a very happy Eid!💖 💕

on another note, I’ve finally gotten around to cleaning out my askbox! under the cut is almost every ask I’ve gotten that i haven’t answered in the past.... I’m not sure. it’s been a WHILE though.

as a warning, there’s all sorts of stuff, and it’s all untagged! also also, if you sent one of these asks and want me to remove it, just let me know!

yes!! @fuckaspunk IS super sweet and talented and i AM very lucky to have them! and I’ve heard from reliable sources that the feeling is mutual~~💕

i’m glad my comics make you feel less alone; that’s a rough situation you’re in. i really hope you find yourself in a better environment soon!

thank you!!!💕

thank you for understanding! and yes, aidan is a huge help to me??? even when they’re not answering asks, they’re always supporting me in some way, whether that’s making sure I’ve eaten enough, or talking me through my anxiety, or all the other ways they’re there for me every single day💕💕

ok, my tips are!!:

draw as much as possible! even if it’s just lines and shapes with no meaning, you’re still developing your hand/eye skills

BUT: dont draw if you’re not feeling it! if you’re feeling fried, it’s better to take a break. go on a walk to somewhere scenic, read your favorite book, listen to some new music, hang out with friends, or just take a nap! rest up and find some inspiration! you can come back to your sketchbook when you feel energized again

draw stuff that you like! you’ll improve way faster if you’re passionate about what you’re doing

look at art you like with a critical eye. try to examine the different components and figure out what you think works or doesn’t work. try incorporation those components into your own work

read a lot of tutorials and other resources, but take what they say with a grain of salt

ultimately, remember that the only real rule to drawing is that doing it should make you happy

good luck!! i do my best not to pick, but it’s a real struggle; i have lots of scars from it too. ;v; im cheering for you!!!

ALWAYS!!!! if you do, please show me!! my notifications get real busy, but anyone is welcome to IM me any time!

thank you! i actually get very worried about my style; i tend to admire artists with complex linework and delicate shading, so i often feel my style is far to simple! so thank you!!

that is really high praise????? gosh??!?!?!? best of luck with the next three years; i hope you grow to be someone you like even better than me!

thank you!!

peanut time is the best!! i haven’t gotten to do a proper one in a while though ;-; i’ve mostly been feeding the crows on my way back home from night shifts, when i give them the reject eggs from the continental breakfast.

wow, neat!! chickens are so wonderful; i cont wait until i can have some of my own :>

dont be nervous! i know i can be hard to get ahold of over the internet (bc i get overwhelmed easily) and hard to talk with irl (bc i get so nervous and interacting w ppl doesn’t come naturally to me AT ALL) but honestly i?? love making new friends??!

thank you!!? im thankful every day that someone as radient as aidan is in my life for the long haul

thank you!!!!!!!💕

i completely feel that? its ok to hit rough patches! just do your best!!

i dont remember what i felt bad about but THANK YOU💕💕

honestly its done me worlds of good to share my art?? hearing people talk about how they go through all the same shit i do makes me feel so much less alone, especially on the toughest days! so i guess thank you, and thank you?

youre welcome!!!! :>

huh!! i dont know much about shoegaze (other than thinking abt that post abt the guy who pronounced it like fugazi I THINK ABT THAT EVERY TIME) but thats real neat!! im glad youve found something that works for you!!

hey, neat middle name! and youre very welcome; i hope things have been looking up for you since you sent this?💕

i dont remember when this was from but im currently doing really well with my meds!! i switched to a combination of lexapro in the morning and benadryl in the evening, and its been working super well!✨

thank you??!! ;o; i would love to see all your favorite birds!!

hey, right back atcha!!!

:0

ty!!!

hey. thank YOU

you’re absolutely not bothering me! thank you so much!!

!!!!!!!!!!

hey, nice! im glad you like both me and my music!

gosh thanks?!?!

she is the most beautiful and handsome!!!!!!!!!!!! i love her! thank you from both of us!!!!

aw, gosh! im sure i like you too!!

this was from.... A WHILE AGO.... but youre welcome?? i just wish i could have done more

hey, thank you so much!!!!!

thank YOU and a very very belated merry christmas!!!

that does make sense!! reconciling friendships and crushes is tricky business. the best i can say to you is to be as honest and open with each other as you can

i dont personally get those, but ive heard of people experiencing them as a sideeffect when coming off or switching meds

i think these two are part of the same message? but oh man yeah that sucks when ppl are misgendering you AND hitting on you at the same time. on a different note, ive never heard of using a corset to stim before! neat!

i mean, 1. depression doesn’t care if you have a “””good””” reason and 2. ive literally never met anyone w depression (including myself) who thinks that they do have a “””good””” reason for having it. thats the insidious part of depression, is that it makes you think that theres nothing wrong and that its all just you not measuring up in some way

so i guess that would make you.... someone with depression?

real BAD

💕 💖 💞  💓  💗

not yet haha THANK YOU

hey, im glad you like it!! since this blog has gotten so big, its kinda my happy place to be? (for anyone wondering, my reblog blog/personal is @spinels!

that IS a fun fact!! thank you!

it’s absolutely ok! i get a little bitter when people take my work WAY out of context (for example, straight people removing the caption that says “im just really gay” before tagging their bf/gf) but i am 100% ok and happy with people relating to my work in a different way than i intended (ex: a comic i made about being ashamed of my derma getting reblogged by someone struggling to be ok w their visible burn scars)

hoo gosh, thank you!!

glad to have you here!! im glad people can relate to some of the weirdly specific shit i write about tbh???

i’m sorry its taken so long for me to get back to you; that a terrible situation

if you have a teacher you trust, i would absolutely bring it up to them. that is 100% not an ok thing for those kids to be doing. at all.

im glad you at least have your friends that support you! 

:0 WAIT is this someone i know through ucsc?? :0 :0 :0

HA 

aaaa thank you! that is high praise ;v;

i have no words; this is such a touching message. thank you so much ;v;

this is belated but!! the main creative community i can recommend is kzsc, the radio station! i had a real cool time there, and its a great way to make friends and connect with ppl of all sorts! :0

yeah, its totally normal! ive had roommates ive been super tight with, and roommates who i barely ever hung around with. its natural! i doubt you’ll finish college w/o finding a roomie that you get ~The Roomie Experience~ with though, even if its like a housemate or s/t!! ;0

i’ve never been told that, actually! neat!! (and wow?? i cant believe i inspire ppl.... wow......... what a concept tbh??)

oh yikes... i do hope youre feeling better :( im glad my comics can help a little bit at least!

💕 💖 💞  💓  💗!!!

HUGS

i dont remember what this was in reference to, but good to know?

also good to know!?

i think the crows and jays do! i dunno about the squirrels and other birds. and thank you!!

the youth gang..... i love it..... how good???!

i wrote about getting yuri right here! he’s a southern alligator lizard and i love him to bits. 

heres a pic of the Long Boy doin his thing:

hey neat! i’m glad youve chosen a lame you can be proud of!!💖

ive never heard of that!! wow

what play is this?? :0 :0 :0 im so curious now!!

oh SHUCKS...,,,,,,,,,, ;v;

hahahaha omg thank u

i dont actually have any more of them interacting, unfortunately! the owl isnt one specific person, like a lot of my characters are meant to represent. the owl more represents as a whole all the people i run into in my life that i am very very gay for.

thank you!!!

youre very welcome! im glad you feel better!!!!

aaa gosh thank you!!!

hhhhfgh ive gotten less of it recently BUT YEAH that was bad times™️ 

thanks for the info!!! :0

no problem! a lot of the credit honestly goes to @fuckaspunk, who is always keeping me updated on that sort of stuff.

i didn’t know that! a lot of the symbolism seems to come from multiple sources sometimes, from what ive seen?

aaaa gosh omg thank you ;v;

aw thank you???!!

nice!!! oct 24 bdays go!!!

thank you!! it really does mean a lot actually!!!!!!!

of course?? antisemitism cant be ignored in this fight

aw, thats so cute! id love to hear what headcanons you have tbh???

hey thanks?! this is really cool to hear, tbh. i try to be positive most of the time, but im not going to like,,, kid myself when im not feeling it and im glad that other people can appreciate that too, ya know?

wow!!

(this one!) thank you i love that one too???!

hey, im glad you found your way here!! thank you so much!!!

aaaa ty! 

hmmm i have two leopard geckos, and they made very good beginning lizards for me and aidan! but i would maybe ask someone a bit more experienced than me, like @kaijutegu​ or @wheremyscalesslither​!!

thank you!!

one day at a time! (but seriously, thank you!!)

yummy yummy sauce...... ty!!!

awww, gosh! thank you!?

AAAA TY BOTH I GET SO SELF-CONSCIOUS ABT MY VOICE,,,,, ;o;

:0 i havent watched that, but it sounds rly cool!!

i like that fun fact a lot! ty!!

pae stands for paerlin, which is what @fuckaspunk​‘s internet handle used to be! i used it to refer to them on my blog in secret back when they still didnt know i had a crush on them.... ;//v//;

aaaaa thank you!!!  ;o;

nice nice nice ty!!

>:0 get back down here!! (jk that’s rly neat! highfive!!) 

those are all good words that i like!! thank you!!!!

i dont know anything about him, but i looked him up and i guess i can see it?!

@fishcrow is really cool! ive never really interacted with them, but im p sure were mutuals...? anyway yeah their comics are rly cute and cool!

that is me! thank you; i hope things go well for you as well!

hello to you too!

aaaa ty!!! tbh the number of nice anons i get way way way outnumbers the mean ones <3

thank you! thank YOU for existing!

:0 chocolate croissant, here i come!!!

thank you!!!!!!💕

its literally my pleasure!!!

aaa ty!!! 💕💕

hehe im glad! 

sldf;j;sfjdklfdslfjs thank you so much?????? what a compliment omg gosh

yeah!! i have a hard time on settling what class id be, but i feel like id be a heart player! 

ohh um! im not sure which pens youre referring to, but if you mean the ones I use for my comics, i color them with Winsor & Newton ProMarkers, and I do the lines with a purple fine-point Sakura Gelly Roll Classic pen! i also use micron pens of all different sizes and colors in some of my non-diary comic art!

aww thank you so much!!

:0 :) :0 !!!!!!

ty!!! ive grown to love him very much as well!!

thank you! i hope you are doing well also!!

i love them very much?!! id put a picture but i dont have one with all four of them so instead imagine me lying on the floor crying abt how much i love them bc thats me basically every day

you dont mean......

?!?!?!?!?!?!

awwww ty!!!

HEY WOW

aaa gosh thank you!💕

DOUBLE FOLLOW

gay dragons combine the best of both very good things: gay and dragons. im glad you appreciate them w me tysm ;v;

aaa what a lovely message! ty💕

3rd-shift-working, depression-having, corvid-loving solidarity fistbumnp!!!!

huh! ive never heard of that; ill check it out maybe!!

ah im really glad? tysm!!💕

my understanding is that it helps people who have text-to-speech readers? but im honestly not as well informed on that as i should be! 

hell yeah!!!! 

gosh!!!!!

hnmngnhng youve probably already made a decision but i just gotta say.........shadow rulez

delicious!!

i havent!! i really want to though!

oh man ALL THE TIME. i usually try to either reality check with someone i trust, or to do an activity thats easy and i know i can do, or both!

i love andre and karl!!! its actually a huge influence on me and my art tbh??? 

i had a good (and safe) trip! ty!!!

hey, thank you!!!

oh jeez thats bad :( i think this was in response to when i needed to wait between med refills?

i cant give a precise reason, tbh! when it comes to whats lucky, i just sort of.... go with my gut, ya know?

thank you!! 👍

that sure sounds like insomnia! its almost hard for me to say tbh, bc ive had trouble sleeping for as long as i can remember, so NOT having trouble sleeping is bizarre and unrealistic to me haha... but i think the bottom line is, if its interrupting your daily routine and making it hard for you to have enough energy, then its something you should look into remedies for!

:0 :0 :0

ohhh how nice! ill give it a try! :>

omg,,,, nope, just me!

thank you!!!!!!

honestly? thats such a good way to look at it i love the idea of my blog as a big zine

always!!!!! go for it!!!

hey, thank you so much!!!!!

omg, thats so great! thank you!

im so glad; thank you!!!

thank you so much!💖 (and mexico, neat! i love hearing where people are following from??)

aaaaaaaaaaaa ;//v//; thank you??? i get so happy whenever ppl tell me they like my singing aaaaaaa

aw, hey, no worries! money is all well and good, but in some ways, messages like this mean just as much!

its cool that comic gave you plural feels! im def not a system though :> 

its tricky, isnt it? i still feel like im no good at it lmao

LISTEN,,, there is a 99.9999% chance i wont notice, and a 100% chance i wont judge. reblog away! 

THANK YOU ARENT THEY THE BEST I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

thank you!! i hope you have a good day as well!

aaa ty!!💖

aa ty! (what a cool name!!! im kind jealous ngl!)

awww thank you💖

i do my best! i just worry when im not active, bc i tend to connect my self-worth to my output (;^; )

aaaaa ty!! 💖

!!!!!!!!!!!! omg wow i love being called a pretty boy???? ty???????

hey, neat! crow high-five!

aw, thank you!!! 💖

im doing my best! thank you so much, messages like this really help when im in a place like that tbh ;v;

gosh this is so sweet? thank you so muhc !!?

thank you all!! im sorry that saying thank you over and over sounds so repetitive, but i truely do mean it for every one of you!!!

i am..... one of those things!

well thank you!!

ohoho~✨

thank you! and honestly im sure it does??

hey, cool! good for you!!!!!!! and ty!!

aw gosh thank you!💖

hey, wow! thats super cool; thank you so much!

(i dont follow the first person i followed on tumblr anymore.... they became a hockey blog rip haha)

aaaah, thank you so much!!

almost???

i do!! drunken lullabies is an absolute banger!!!!!!!!!!

i am!!!! thank you!!

aw, ty!!! 💖

hee hee, thank you! 

my biggest tip honestly?? have someone who can be by your side to help you with... basically everything... during your recovery. bc trust me, i was n o t  a v a i l a b l e. i spent a lot of my recovery playing 2048 at the same time as watching tv, bc doing both at once distracted me from how much the bandages itched.

thank you!! (i think this was in reference to getting top surgery!)

how shitty??????? yikes. i hope your supervisor has your back??? bc wow????

hey!!! thank you!!! i draw all my comics traditionally on paper! im not sure what you mean by the writing though? if you mean the word bubbles, i do those by hand on paper too!

I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND THAT FEELING,,,, im so happy ppl talk to me, but i get really nervous about saying the wrong thing. 

when i’m down, i usually crave validation. i like being reminded about things ive done right! i also like gentle reality checks, like, ‘hey: this is the situation, this is what we can do about it. ok? ok’

i unfortunately dont have any!! i had a couple at one point, but they’ve since been lost to the depths of my old laptop. and hey, thank you so much!!

now thats a nifty trick!! im terrible at telling all my white tablets from each other lmao

!!!!!!! ITS ME!!!!!!!!

maybe you just need some space? i know i sometimes temporarily block people i know, if i need some private space or if i dont trust myself to keep cool and solve problems constructively. do what you need to do to feel at ease, and go from there, ya know?

thank you!!!

its,,,, up somewhere above in this monster post lmao i,m so sorry,,,,

thank you so much!!!

WOW NO WORRIES??,,,,,,,,, INCREDIBLE 10/10???????

all four of these came right after i gave myself a hair cut and THANK YOU SO MUCH??? i live for validation and it feels so good to have my actions affirmed ;o;

[crazydreameralive]

tag game ₍₍ (ง ˙ω˙)ว ⁾⁾

Tagged by my lovely mutual @mizz-apple2016​💕 ( i m bored af^^ )

relationship status: single 

favorite color: pastels, specially pink and purple. but also sky blue and black

lipstick or chapstick: — chapstick, gotta keep em lips moist (they be dry and cracked cuz i forget to use it often)

last song you listened to: Infinite - Before the Dawn (ICONIC MY ANTHEM)

last movie you watched: Insidious (my fav movie lmao)

top 3 characters: Shinya Hiragi and Mikaela Hyakuya ( both from Owari no seraph) and Tony Stark <3<3<3 i would die for them thanks

top 3 ships: in no particular order. Showki from Monsta X, Gureshin from Owari no Seraph, Victuuri from Yuri on Ice. (also i have to mention the fourth one that i remembered loving to bits and pieces during my teens it was TEN X ROSE from Doctor Who)

books you are currently reading: none *keeps on buying books though* but Owari no seraph 3rd novel by Takaya Kagami rly is lurking there the most with The Guardian by Alex London.

top 5 musicals: ? i dont watch~~ wait does ‘’Labyrinth’’ count?

I’m tagging @markthescammer​ who tagged me on another tag thingy I STILL HAVENT DONE ?? and i mean i cant tag the one who tagged me tho lmao ~~ also i actually would like to know more  @bright-flowering whose fics really be making me all soft (i ought to re-read~~) honestly idk who to tag cuz i really dont talk to anyone? lmao at my lonely self ~~