#it's like trying to study for a subject u don't understand nor care for

[infiniteorangethethird]

everyone: you should use your 20s to get to know as many people as you can! spend your college years making friends and connections! you cannot live a successful life without a widespread people network!!

me, autistic + loveless apl: I should do what now

[popatochisssp]

ooh! asks are open! if you're not accepting, don't worry about it! if u are, then how do you hc each skeles ideal job and actual job in the human world?

Their ideal and actual jobs are the same, because I am a softie who wants all her boys to be happy so everybody’s got jobs they enjoy!

As for specifics, I’ve talked about some in passing, but see the full list below! ;3

Sans (Undertale): He has two! He’s a delivery driver and does security for the local mall. The former is a natural extension of his lazy demeanor and special abilities– teleportation lets him make all his deliveries near-instantly and then he spends the rest of the time allotted to him napping in his truck or taking a Grillby’s break. On weekends, he moonlights as a mall cop and it’s equally his speed since it’s a lot of observation and ‘policing’ but very little actual responsibility. He may also, on the side, sell a few bootlegs here and there, but you’d be very hard-pressed to catch him at it.

Papyrus (Undertale): Strip club bouncer. I am one million percent behind this, he would love this job and be loved at this job, and he deserves that. But that’s just his night-job, he has a day-job too since he likes to keep busy and while the sun is up, he’s a personal trainer! He’s fantastic at encouraging people through their work-out routines and they find it easier to stick to their healthy diets and make good choices when the alternative is the horrific thought of………disappointing Papyrus…! He’s very good at his job and has so much fun with it that he barely even thinks of it as a job.

Sky (Underswap Sans): Lots of these skeletons do double-duty and with as much energy as Sky has, you know he’s one of ‘em: he’s a firefighter as his main career, and on the side he bartends. He’s a physically fit guy who loves the idea of being a hero, and he also has no skin or lungs, so he can get into lots of places in a burning building that his human coworkers can’t– and that’s without even factoring in the shortcut ability. But he’s not at the station 24/7 and he likes to be productive, so he picks up bartending shifts where he can. He’s very precise with his pours and he’s very charming and sociable with patrons, so he’s a joy to have on shift for everybody!

Paps (Underswap Papyrus): Only one job for this guy, he’s a librarian! He is a huge literature nerd and the Underground only had what just so happened to fall down and not get completely ruined. Getting to work in a place with thousands of books he’s never seen before is awesome–and so is the actual job! It’s pretty quiet as a rule and the stakes are low, so he ends up liking most of the people he interacts with. A chill work environment for a chill skeleton, he’s very happy here!

Jasper (Underfell Sans): He’s a mechanic, and also moonlights at the infamous ‘dog stand. He likes working with his hands and doesn’t mind getting a little dirty. That plus his intricate knowledge of mechanics makes working at an auto shop a good fit for him. He ends up actually missing a little bit of his routine Underground, though– goddamn nostalgia… When the Asgore in his universe decrees that his subjects who owned shops and food businesses Underground reopen on the surface, a political move to improve human relations and make more positive associations with the very intimidating, violent-looking monsters– he actually decides to go for it and starts manning his ‘dog stand whenever he feels like it. He makes some mean hot-animals and is actually one of the more personable of the Fell-monsters so he’s doing his bridge-building duty pretty well, even if only as a weekend kinda thing.

Pyre (Underfell Papyrus): He’s still the Captain of the Royal Guard, but…monsters are making some very strong moves toward demilitarization and in peace-times, there’s just not all that much for him to do. Somewhere in all of his new downtime he takes up studying law and eventually makes a career out of it. Lawyer is kind of a natural job for a guy who’s intelligent, has a great head for details, and doesn’t shy away from an argument, so once he makes it through law school in record time, he’s a sight to behold in the courtroom: eloquent, passionate, and always sharply-dressed! He specializes in human/monster rights-related cases and will even do some pro bono consulting for the causes he deems worthy, but if you can pay his fee and he doesn’t completely loathe you, he’ll take pretty much any case. If he’d been born on the surface to start with, though, he may have pursued a career in acting– he’s has a lot of natural talent and still counts it as one of his interests, but… it’s been soured, just a little bit, by the nasty role he had to play Underground. He’ll probably only pick it up again as a hobby, at most.

Mal (Swapfell Sans): Like Pyre, he doesn’t want to– and won’t!– give up his position as Captain of the Royal Guard so lightly, but on the surface with monsters integrating into peaceful human society, he has a lot more spare time than he did before and has to figure out something to do with it. He eventually settles in as an actuary. Numbers are and have kind of always been his happy-place: mathematics is cold, hard logic, cause-and-effect that’s simple the way nothing in the messy real world ever is, and aside from physical training losing himself in statistics and probabilities is the best sense of flow he’s ever been able to slip into. Once he gets his degrees accredited, it’s very easy for him to find employment running numbers and he’d start off somewhere in the insurance industry. He’d be fine there for awhile– he’s firm and impersonal, and not easily swayed by sob-stories– but eventually the way the industry is structured to benefit corporations over people becomes a little much for even him to handle. From there, he’ll move on into the private sector and do a lot of freelance consulting for companies to analyze and manage risk. It’s very boring and nerdy to just about anyone who isn’t him, but he likes the work!

Rus (Swapfell Papyrus): He’s a commission artist. He doesn’t like going out too much and the idea of getting any of the entry-level jobs he’s qualified for–retail and customer service, mostly– makes him want to puke and/or die a little. When he finds out there’s a thriving community of people requesting and paying for art online, he is so there. He takes a little time to get familiar with digital art and generates a presence for himself online to attract interest and then opens himself up to commissions. He has almost no limits on what he’s willing to draw and quickly stumbles across the furry scene, the kink scene, and the places they overlap, so he gets paid really well and gets to work from home while doing it. For the sake of his brother’s reputation, he tries not to mention or show any of the explicit stuff he works on in front of anybody they know, but he’s personally unashamed about it.

Slate (Horrortale Sans): Ever since his head injury, he’s not really capable of holding down a job– his short-term memory is garbage and his ability to learn and process new tasks is a lot slower than any reasonable employer would be understanding of, so that rules out pretty much all his options right there. Since monsters hit the surface in his universe, though, humanity was shocked and appalled by the circumstances Underground and in spite of some fear and condemnation, the outpouring of pity and sympathy was enormous. A lot of legislation ended up quickly pushed through so that monsters could get regular stipends in reparations for their imprisonment and suffering, and also can receive disability benefits if deemed eligible. With a giant hole in his head and all that comes with it, he’s eligible so he doesn’t need a job, but at the insistence of his brother, he does need to get out of the house. His aimless wandering eventually leads him to an animal shelter seeking volunteers. He likes the pups and kitties because they’re soft and cute, plus they’re all down on their luck like he was. He’s very gentle with even the most aggressive animals and after a very short time volunteering there, he gains a bit of a reputation as a miracle worker…but he doesn’t really care about that, he’s just happy to help the little fuzzballs out.

Papy (Horrortale Papyrus): Like his brother, he gets a reparations stipend from the human government but unlike his brother, he’s not eligible for disability– nor would he want to be! He craves getting to be a productive member of society again since he…wasn’t of nearly as much use, Underground as he wished he could’ve been. Entry-level jobs would be fine for him, anything to be out and gainfully employed, but he’s rapidly dissatisfied with any of the jobs he takes. He knows that cashiers and clerks and receptionists are all very valuable parts of an infrastructure, but it’s just…not really for him? He wants to make a bigger difference, he wants to help people, and that’s what leads him to nursing. Between his brother’s disability benefits, their reparations, and his wages from part-time employment, he’s able to put himself through school without putting any serious strain on their financial situation and eventually graduates to registered nurse. From his underground experiences he’s no stranger to blood, other human bodily fluids, or even death, so handling it in the context of trying to save lives is something he’s not only capable of, but delighted to be a part of. He’s definitely a little down when one of his patients doesn’t make it, but he’s not devastated by it: he just vows to keep doing his best so that he can help as many people as possible!