#ive been putting this off for way too long

[kingjasnah]

easily one of the biggest early stormfather Ls of all time. "something concrete" LOLLLL

[macroglossus]

being evaluated for adhd by having one of those full psych evals that last like two hours. scared frightened etc.... last time i took it i lied extensively bc i was 13 and thought they might tell my mommy if i said i had suicidal thoughts. and i still have a habit of lying to therapists bc i'm embarrassed......... AGH idk. what if i take it and they tell me that the reason im Like This is bc im genuinely just weird and shitty and not bc im mentally ill at all. SCARED

[a-shadowedvales]

LETS TALK ABOUT BECKY IVES FOR A MINUTE!

when you think about becky, you have to remember that she spent at least four years listening to terry’s “crazy theories” about hawkins lab, and the big bad man taking jane away. she knew terry took part in “hippie crap” and assumed that messed with her head. that those experiences combined with miscarrying in the third trimester had a terrible strain on her mental health, ultimately losing her connection to reality. she spent those years watching terry fight and lose legal battles against brenner and hawkins. she pleaded for her to stop, to get help, as their relationship grew stressed and strained because becky didn’t believe her, and terry hated her for it.

and then when terry’s mind was completely broken, she spent her days and nights caring for her. the show never touched on this. just what did becky think happened to terry? what story was she told? was terry put into a random hospital with doctors from hawkins lab, under a guise of caring for her, just to tell becky there was some kind of accident? maybe a car accident. did they claim the drugs used in the mk ultra testing from all those years ago took affect on her mind? probably not, because then becky would be in an opportunity to sue. i highly doubt there would have been any mention of the lab, opposed to some, "unfortunate accident." it really bugs me that there’s no story about what becky believed made terry catatonic. terry knew becky didn’t believe her, and as such, definitely did not tell her about her plans to break into the lab. so a story could have easily been concocted.

and then, one random day, a kid shows up at her doorstep, claiming to be the daughter she didn’t believe existed. immediately, by jane opening the door with her mind, becky held some kind of belief for she'd heard terry’s rants about her baby being used for experiments, experiments which gave her powers. and in comes jane, demanding to see her mother, able to open a locked door, blood dripping from her nose. all too soon she realises that there has so be some semblance of truth. the girl says her name is jane: she fits all the descriptions. the descriptions of the niece she never had. this child who her sister fought tooth and nail to get back. i can’t even imagine the guilt that would begin to fester for not believing terry, for thinking she was having a mental break, for trying to get her to see therapists and get her some real, serious help.

scared and confused for herself and her sister, and unable to fathom what is happening, what does she do? she comforts jane. there is distance, there’s awkwardness, but this girl is her blood and every moment that passed only proved that she could actually be jane ives. she makes her a sandwich, tries to comfort her, tells her that her mother is in a dream. probably a good dream. she comforts and tells her that terry never stopped believing.

she always believed you were out there. she always believed you’d come home one day. home? yeah, home.

she offered her, this strange little girl, a place in her home with her and her mother. she didn’t push, she didn’t need to know everything in that moment; she focused on jane and nothing else. the girl was obviously traumatised judging by the way she spoke, the way she sheltered herself. if everything terry claimed was indeed true, then becky couldn’t even begin to think about what she’d gone through.

i wanna help you, but to really do that, i need you to talk to me, okay? it doesn’t have to be now. it doesn’t have to be today. when you’re ready, okay?

she never moved a single thing in jane’s room. although she didn’t believe terry, she respected and loved her enough to keep it exactly as she’d planned. and at least she could give jane that, the vision her mother had for her, what the first steps of their wonderful life would have been like. becky claimed terry was “stuck” living the “same dream” over and over. where becky, too, was the one who was stuck. terry became 24/7 care, and unless she had helpers (which i highly doubt), becky would have given up her job, her out of home hobbies, her entire life to care for her sister. stuck in an endless routine until jane came along and struck her with the reality of it all.

as soon as jane contacts the void, you can see becky looks on edge and nervous. which, fair enough! she asks if she can sit and watch, but doesn’t interfere or distract jane. she even sits a little further away from her, perhaps out of fear (which would be completely justified. this girl physically moved things with her mind, who knows what else she can do) or just trying to take this all in within her own time and space. but the moment, the second jane departs the void and is in a state of distress, she moves to comfort her. she isn’t sure how, and doesn’t expect it to be returned, but offers it nonetheless. as far as she knows jane just spoke to her sister; she would be dying to know what happened, if she said anything. but remains silent and focuses on the child.

unfortunately we really don’t see much else of their dynamic on screen, but it is very justified that becky contacted hawkins and tried to get a hold of hopper. he and joyce were the only ones who seemed to have some kind of understanding; of course she would want to contact them. she put on a brave face in front of jane, focused on her and her needs. but as soon as she put the bed down and jane wanted some time alone in her room, becky had a moment to breathe. to think about her, her sister, all those wasted years because she didn’t believe. so, weeks later, when she gets a phone call from a weak sounding girl, saying she was sorry, the relief is immense. when recovered from her illness after closing the gate, the first thing jane wanted to do was call her aunt. hopper got on the line after the initial apology and asked if becky would come to hawkins, so they could work things out from there.

i just think becky is such a neat, complex character for the literal twenty minutes (probably less) screen time she gets. i adore the way she treats jane, and think she is such a good influence in her life. imagine all the stories becky could tell her about terry. things no one else could. her relationship with her aunt is one like no other, for both the sake of her mother, and that she is the only true family she has ever known, or as far as she knows, even has. becky never expects anything from jane (unlike a lot of the people in her life), and in that respect, jane does actually open up to her overtime. to becky, jane isn’t a girl who’s saved the world a few times. she’s the niece she didn’t believe in, and would spend the rest of her life making it up to her and terry.

[calamitys-child]

I'm always like eugh why do my boots wear out so much and then it's like. Insert 7 minute montage of me falling into and/or off of cliffs, boulders, scree, trees, roots, shells, scrap metal...

[kickedin17]

Was going to work on the next chapter of my fic tonight but then decided to be responsible and water my flowers and also played with my dog, and then decided to knit like 7 rows of my current project, and then decided to eat a peach for dessert, and then realized my peaches were going to go bad before I can finish them all so I decided to make a peach cobbler at 9:25pm, but first of all I didn't have the right type of milk (only had oat. Because Woke. And actually I did have real milk but it went bad yesterday and I didn't realize til I poured it into the mixing bowl and then discovered that it smelled horrible so had to dump out like half a cup of sugar), and I think there was way too much water from cooking down the peaches, and also I had to more than halve the recipe bc I only had 2 peaches and it called for 5 but there was WAY too much batter in comparison to the peaches even halved and it boiled over the first baking dish, so I had to put it in a different one and it got all over my only good oven mitts while I was doing that so getting it back into the oven was an Event, and then after all of that fuckmess 40 minutes later it was just a slop pudding of peaches and sugar-flour with burnt edges, and I didn't know how to fix it because it was bedtime by then (30 minutes ago), so I cried and dumped it out & took the trash out, and then while I was walking to the dumpster in the dark asked myself What if there was a scary man hiding in the corn field across the street from my house? which was a cool idea to plant in my own mind because I'm home entirely alone this week, so now I'm just thinking about that, and also while my peach slop was cooking I decided to make a different lunch for work tomorrow instead of the lunch I was going to take (which was the leftover spaghetti I made for dinner bc I remembered I sometimes get sick if I eat tomato sauce 2 days in a row), and in the process of that found a bunch of rotten vegetables my parents left in the fridge before they went out of town, and it's now 11pm and I have to be up at 6am, and I did not work on my fic.

Moral of the story is Never procrastinate joshler to be "productive." Always commit to joshler only

[harbingermotel]

the unsleeping city s1e15 hall of heroes

(richard siken voice) you're in a maserati with a beautiful boy,

[orcelito]

ok i am actually so very angry and there's literally nothing i can do to fix it. life keeps going on. she might even be happy. and fuck dude, i'll make sure im happy too, i was a fully developed person before she was in my life and i'll continue to be one without her. but God Damn, the fact that she can just do something so blatantly awful and unfair to me and then run off without any actual repercussions is just so fucking rankling to me.

like perhaps she feels guilty. she said she did when it was all going down. but it was just something she "needed to do". so obviously she didn't feel guilty enough or she wouldnt have done it like that lmaoooo

i really did deserve to have a good solid yell at her. but unfortunately, by the time i did see her in person i just wanted her out of my fucking life. so. no yelling was done, unfortunately.

[charonte-simi]

I've genuinely found a weed strain that seems to fix my attention issues/executive dysfunction. I just did dishes, then baked a batch of muffins so I have breakfast to take to work, then did the dishes again, And swept the floor. Who the fuck

[barkingangelbaby]

venting so much i ran out of tags lmao

[suntann]

i hate how so much of adhd management tips are like "here are some ways to maintain your focus and get things done on time!!: [anxiety inducing tactic] [anxiety inducing tactic] [anxiety inducing tactic] [anxiety inducing tactic] [anxiety inducing tactic]"

[effervescent-fool]

.

[evilmagician430]

happy MY BIRTHDAY to those who celebrate. and to those who do not, then nonetheless i wish you a happy anniversary of hitler's suicide

[wabblebees]

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[fosterscribbles]

I have a few dumb acnh comics in the works based on stuff in game that made me laugh. Here's one about a nickname that baffled me

[kordbot]

going to finally finish emesis blue. pray for me

[scootarooni]

i finished totk

peace and love on planet earth