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#ive only seen three of these myself
staghunters · 1 year
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AUGUST 27 MOVIE PICK - JACKIE'S (?) JOURNAL SPECIAL
I thought maybe it would be fun to step away from the usual lineup in these polls and go for something a lil different.
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S1x06 of Yellowjackets shows us a little glimpse of Jackie's (supposed) favorite movies. I thought it fun to pick out one of those to watch on the 27th of August. All these are from 1996, but some post-date the crash.
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kkolg · 10 months
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we need more warrior cats x murder drones shit
that’s it
that’s the post
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panspy · 6 months
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hmmmmmm.................vent post under tags...... feel free to give advice or dont¯\_(ツ)_/¯
#i think this is an autism related thing#but i genuinely feel like i wasnt made right for the world we live in#like something is just missing from me that ive never seen ppl talk about#and i know this is going to sound entitled and privileged and i KNOW i know i promise and im so lucky i can even be thinking about this but#it feels weird to have the privilege to be scared#this is specifically in regards to working#like having a job. like going to work#i feel like im missing an extremely important part of my brain or my BEING that is capable ot going through the motions of participating#in society. i never felt that switch of wanting to get a job in high school to make money for myself and get that experience#i feel like there's something i MISSED where everyone took a class on how to apply and go to interviews and write resumes and not be scared#like i NEED to be walked through every SINGLE step because i dont know HOW#and i see my peers and the literal entire world around me participating in this atmosphere and i dont know where to start#im fucking twenty three years old and ive only ever been an intern and an assistant#not even a full year of working#i cant drive and i probably wont ever because thats a whole other can of worms#and that means i have to rely on other people to even get to wherever it was i needed to go#i feel like a fucking child because im missing this knowledge that everyone else seems to have#ive tried i really have but none of it seems simple and its all so much and there arent steps to follow#i mean there ARE but its like 1) look up job 2) apply 3) interview 4) yay you're employed#and im talking about each micro step inbetween#what am i missing#and then theres the fucking demand avoidance that slaps me across the face whenever my mom brings it up to me like i KNOW youre being#supportive and encouraging and its not your fault my brain turns off and decides im full of shame bc i cant CONFRONT ANYTHING#jesus christ#manf i know u can see this maybe dont bring it up to mom i can do that on my own maybe#i WANT to help i just want to help at my own pace but unfortunately the world isnt built around individual paces and nothing revolves#around me. i know this#i want to help my mom i want her to never be stressed about money and to retire and never work or help me pay my student loans but i#genuinely feel like theres a switch that never turned on in my head and im being left behind and i genuinely dont know how to. like be alive
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lateseptemberdawn · 3 months
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Ngl bad parents give me such an ick like stay tf away from me ew
#this cousin of mine has twins#twin boys#and while i sort of understand why she is the way she is with them#i realy cant wrap my head completely around it#because well#its such blind idiot stupid fucking BAD behaviour especially for a mother was especially towards her children#especially when theyre twins and youre so blatantly partial the favoured one KNOWS hes favoured#like. she has absolutely ruined her second boy and absolutely cannot handle him and yet slaps him every chance she gets#doesnt listen to him refuses to indulge him even the least bit shows zero affection and ive been here three days and man can i see#that child is fucking parched for affection specifically from him mother because he is neglected#he knows he is neglected#he is scared shitless of her and acts out of his way to get any attention he can because that is the only time his mother will hold him#be it with sharp fingers and a hold that digs into his skin#theyre literally just 5 years old#the neglected child i a fucking dream come true. is already smart as FUCK#does anything you tell him to do RIGHT THAT SECOND#the only flaw is that he doesnt listen when anyone tells him not to do something which isnt even a flaw for fucks sake#thats a fucking child hes gonna ASK#and you shout at him and dont amswer him and when he keeps asking you hit him#my heart fucking cries man#the other one knows his mother favours him and despises his brother and that evil fucker (i know its not his fault) lies#and gets his brother hit and then fucking TEASES HIM ABOUT IT THREATENS HIM LATER ON LIKE I AM SO DISGUSTED#HOW MUCH OF AN AWFUL PARENT DO YOU HAVE TO BE FOR YOUR KIDS TO BE AWARE OF HOW TO MANIPULATE YOU AT THE AGE OF FUCKING FIVE#F I V E (5).#they. are. FIVE.#i seriously want to keep him to myself because she will ruin him#and whats more disgusting is when shes getting him to do stuff shes all like “baby do this” and the moment hes back and standing close she#pushes him away? looks at him disgusted? says “why do you bother me so much”??????#that is child is the most fucking neglected child ive ever seen and seriously man why does this happen and why do I HAVE TO WITNESS IT#the favoured one is pure evil and NO ONE SAYS ANYTHING TO HIM HES DUMB ASF CANT EVEN WRITE ONE WORD WITHOUT DYING DOES NOTHING DOESNT LISTEN
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readingloveswounds · 10 months
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so i encountered almost every single living Big Name in my field last night.
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many-gay-magpies · 2 years
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i still like the sandman as a media but i've grown so tired of the fandom (at least on tumblr, idk abt other places) because the tag is literally overrun with dreamling. guys please he was in ONE EPISODE. cmon
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foxstens · 1 year
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am i the only one who adores aftg and loathed trc
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the-kipsabian · 2 years
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i have no idea how im gonna survive tomorrow
help
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kaisturni · 3 months
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pillow princess | c.sturniolo
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→ chris x fem!reader
→ plot; traveling with the triplets, y/n usually shares the room with nick. in a sudden change of plans, she ends up sharing the room with chris. with the unexpected presence of one bed for the two to share, tension arises through the night when only inches separate them.
→ warnings; SHMUTTT, dom!chris, swearing, fingering, grinding, unprotected sex, cum eating, hair pulling, creampie, use of nicknames
→ a/n; this one has so much build up i didn’t even realize so sorry 😛 thank you to everyone who voted, hope you guys love it!
NOT PROOFREAD (sorry)
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“that flight was terrible,” i groaned, the boys all nodding in agreement, everyone stretching their limbs every which way.
“honestly i just can’t wait to get to the hotel, anyway, i call sharing a room with matt,” nick says, as the four of us wait for your check bags to arrive.
“what! why?” i shoot a confused look at him, since nick and i are always the pair to share a room together, hell we have so many sleepovers, even sharing a bed isn’t a problem.
“because you fuckin snore, y/n,” nick states bluntly, i feel my face falling into offense.
“no i don’t!” “yes you do,” the three say in unison. i always hated when they did that. it’s creepy. but i’m confused at this sudden accusation, because nick has NEVER brought up anything about me snoring before.
i say my thoughts out loud “what are you talking about? even if i did, you sleep like a rock!” i retort.
“tonight is just NOT that night, besides we have to be up all day tomorrow to vlog AND film with sam and colby. besides, chris doesn’t mind your snoring anyway,” nick argues, chris shoots a cheesy smile and a thumbs up at me, i roll my eyes at the both of them realizing this is a losing battle.
“okay, whatever. just don’t keep me up all night,” i point a finger sharply at chris, since he’s always up until the break of dawn and even then has more energy than ive seen anyone have in the morning.
“noted.”
at least we’re not sharing a bed- i think to myself. not that it would necessarily be a problem, but for some reason he always made me so nervous. i dont want to admit it’s a crush, and i dont think sharing a bed with him would help with the aching nerves i get being around him. the thought of the circumstance makes me shudder. best just not to think about it.
✧ : *✧・゚:* ✧ : *✧・゚:* ✧ : *✧・゚:* ✧ : *✧・゚:* ✧
we all go to nick and matt’s room first, just to film some of the vlog. we all explore the room, opening every drawer and examining the snacks on the tv stand, and i admire how plush and soft the bedding is. at least i’ll sleep good on this tonight. chris seems to have the same idea as me, gripping on to the top part of one of the beds where it meets the headboard. i can’t help the thought of him doing the same thing but me beneath his body; the idea of it makes me squirm. i shake away the image as my ears tune back in to the conversations going on.
“that’s a really cool… deck!” chris exclaims,
“that’s a REALLY COOL DECK,” nick mocks him, eliciting giggles from both me and matt, and i almost forget for a second that this isn’t the room i’m staying in, and i try to keep the conversation going as long as possible.
after about 15 minutes of filming, matt hands the camera to nick, giving the outro for the evening.
“goodnight everyone, we’ll see you guys tomorrow when we go explore austin,” nick says to the camera, then shutting it off.
after our own collective goodnights, chris and i making our way down to our own space. i’m so exhausted i can’t even hear myself think. my eyes linger down the dim hallway to matt and nick’s room. i’m honestly still a bit bitter about the whole room situation, i make a mental note to scare the shit out nick at some point during filming with sam and colby to get back at him.
i unconsciously smile at the idea of it, not noticing chris looking back at me,
“what are you smiling about?” he says with a little giggle, i reconnect my brain to my actions, eyes widening at what he could be thinking about me stupidly smiling as he keys us in to the room,
“nothing, just thought of something funny earlier. it was a pretty cool deck,,,” i say in a sing- song voice mocking him, he rolls his eyes “yeah whatever, it wasn’t that funny,” he states, i do a mental cheer to myself that he didn’t catch on to me trying to unconditionally hide where my mind was going to after he said those words; to be fair i WASN’T smiling at the thought of us sharing a room, but considering how i had been acting about the whole thing, i’m not exactly sure how convincing my explanation was.
the door opens and he flicks on the lights, after my eyes adjust, both of us are met with a singular king bed, identical headboard facing the city of austin, i can see my eyes widen in the reflection of the window in front of us.
i feel my cheeks turn hot, and i can see chris out of the corner of my eye glancing at me, also keeping himself silent amidst our little… situation.
he breaks the awkward silence in the room by clearing his throat,
“gummy bears,” he starts, placing his bag on the plush white chair in the corner of the room, while i throw mind mindlessly on the floor trying my best not to think about the current situation
“i’ll be eating these tonight,”
“woah for free?” i say grabbing the bag from him, also making an effort to cut the awkwardness somehow still lingering in the air.
“no definitely for purchase,” he says walking around the room, “oh,” I throw the bag down, now uninterested in the snacks in front of me.
“what side do you like?” he asks, making himself comfortable right in the middle, arms stretched out on both sides, giving me a crooked smile.
cute.
“i prefer the left. but whatever side is fine,” i proclaim, doing my best to seem indifferent and not give him the impression that i’m going to be a pain to sleep with.
not like that, of course.
“good answer, i sleep on the right,” his smile doesn’t break as hops off the bed and rifles through his duffel bag,
“i’m gonna take a quick shower, won’t be long. put something on for us to watch,” i nod, and he disappears into the bathroom.
time passes as i’m left alone flicking through channels, eventually settling on a random movie i’m sure neither of us have seen before, this will do. i decide to find some pajamas of my own.
of course, my fucking luck and to my horror, i come up empty on a sleep bra AND shorts. i cant help but physically face palm myself at my lack of planning, but forgive me, i was anticipating on only nick seeing me in a lack of clothing.
i peel off the safety of the clothing i have on, and slip in to a separate thong and a t-shirt that is just barely covering my ass.
i’m so fucking stupid.
suddenly, the water shuts off and i race with myself to get back into my side of the bed to avoid chris seeing me and my shift in wardrobe.
he emerges from the bathroom, and i steal a glance at him, standing there with wet curls and his upper half still slick, highlighting all the muscles visible on his body.
the sight of him makes me heat up just to look at, and i cross my legs tightly to hopefully get rid of the aching between them, and flip my body around to face away, unaware to the fact that my ass is on display to him.
“no, no pants, huh?” i hear him let out a shaky breath from the other side of me, feeling my cheeks grow hot again, i make my best attempt to pull my shirt down and face him, beginning my ranted explanation.
“no yeah sorry i-i just was expecting to sleep with nick, this is what i usually wear i’m sor-“
he cuts off my rambling with a laugh,
“you’re fine, it just took me by surprise, that’s all. but you should probably move over, i think we should both go to sleep in a little,” he suggests, i can tell he’s being careful to not fully raise the covers, in order to avoid the exposure on my end.
i almost feel relief that he doesn’t care, but part of me wants him to care. to see him get hot and bothered by seeing me like that. but thankfully, yet unthankfully, this is a purely platonic sleeping arrangement.
“yeah, yeah you’re right,” i let out half heartedly, letting my eyes travel back to the scene on the tv, but i can’t help but peer out of the corner of my eye and notice how good he looks.
fuck.
his jaw tight in seeming concentration of the nonsense in front of us, hair messy from his shower, his chest slowly rising up down and rhythm and i almost let my eyes wander down his body to the waistband of his pants or even lower, but i don’t dare to allow myself the chance.
✧ : *✧・゚:* ✧ : *✧・゚:* ✧ : *✧・゚:* ✧ : *✧・゚:* ✧
my eyes shoot awake, and i prop my arms up to look at the clock a few feet away,
3:24am.
the tv is shut off, and chris is calmly sleeping beside me. i guess i had unknowingly fallen asleep at some point during the movie. i sigh and rub my face, beginning to make my attempt to fall back asleep again. suddenly, there’s a shift in the bed and i feel an arm snake across my hip and pull me closer.
i gasp and freeze at the contact, not daring to make a move. i feel chris’ hands squeeze at my hips, and a barely audible groan escapes his lips. my breath starts to pick up when i feel him harden against my ass.
i don’t know if i can take this. he isn’t even awake right now. he doesn’t know what he’s doing.
i quickly turn to face him,
“chris!” i whisper yell and shake his shoulder, with his hand still holding on to my nearly bare hip.
as he comes to consciousness, he deeply inhales and lets his eyes adjust to the darkness. realization hits him when he quickly removes his hand from me and darts up into a seated position. i can almost see him blushing despite the dark haze around us, the same feeling creeping upon myself for the nth time tonight as we sit in silence, which is quickly broken by his voice.
“shit, y/n, i-i’m sorry,” he begins, “i was just dreaming and, and i didn’t realize what i was doing I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable,” he explains. my brows furrow slightly as i realize the context of his words.
“what was the dream?” i ask, my own curiosity getting the best of me, but the confidence in knowing he was most likely having some sort of sex dream about me makes the lustful side of myself take over.
his head tips back, i can tell he’s contemplating his next words.
“you. y/n. us. right now. i always thought you were pretty, but you looked so fucking hot earlier, like you’re literally half naked in the same bed as me. truthfully I’ve had feelings for you, and seeing you like that… it just made me want to fuck you,”
the last part of his statement is just barely above hearing level, and i’m honestly shocked at his confession. i didn’t think this would ever happen, that chris would ever see me in that way, but i got over that quickly.
i don’t know what came over me, but my actions and words only grew in seduction, and i was now determined to break him.
“sorry, i didn’t hear you, you wanted to what?” i crawl over and sit myself on his lap, placing my hands on his bare chest, and i feel his breathing and heart speed up.
“i want to fuck you, y/n,” he says in a single breath, and i take it as a sign to crash my lips into his.
the kiss is deep and sensual, his hands snaking down to my ass and squeezing, causing me to groan, and in response i grind myself onto him, feeling his dick grow hard beneath me.
the lack of material between us causes the wetness between my legs begins to rise quickly, and chris takes no time to comment on the state of my arousal.
“fuck y/n, i can already feel how wet you are,” he says between sloppy kisses, and one of his hands slaps my ass hard, the other gripping for dear life.
i gasp at his action, and his tongue fully enters my mouth, and i don’t bother trying to fight for dominance. all this new contact with him is already making me feel buzzed.
he flips us around so my back hits the bed, and i look up at him as he grips the headboard, our lips reconnecting in a matter of no time.
his hand gently tugs at my shirt, signaling he wants it off, and i inwardly smirk to myself knowing there’s nothing between my shirt and my bare body.
i swiftly remove it off my body, and even in the dim light he can see my chest, i purposefully squeeze them together causing him to bite his lip and move down to claim a nipple in his mouth.
i moan at the contact, he sucks hard at the sensitive bud, other hand snaking down to my panties, which i’m sure are now thoroughly soaked.
as if he read my mind, his fingers easily glide between my folds, and i whimper at the feeling.
“you’re so fucking wet—all for me, yeah?” he says lowly, those words coming out of his raise even more arousal in me, and the only thing i can do is nod and moan in response as he rubs my clit with his wet fingers.
he moves my black thong to the side, and i bite my lip in anticipation for his fingers to enter me, and he slowly inserts two, causing both of us to moan in harmony.
his lips rejoin mine, but the fast pumping of his long fingers inside me make it difficult to kiss him back.
i feel the knot building up in my stomach and i know an orgasm is approaching fast.
“c-chris, i’m gonna cum,” i breath out, shocked that i’m withering under my one of my best friend’s touch.
he hums at first, his pace slowly picking up, “cum for me pretty girl,” he purrs in my ear, i pant feeling the build up in my sensitive nerves release, him continuing to pump as i ride my high through his fingers, now covered in my own cum.
he brings his soaked fingers to his mouth, licking my juices off of his fingers,
“you taste so fucking good y/n,” he bring his hand down back to my folds, and i wince at the contact.
“suck,” he demands, bringing his fingers to my mouth, and i look him dead in the eye as my tongue swirls around his digits.
the eye contact pierced through me, and i let go of the grasp i have on his fingers with a pop, his lashes fluttering at the sound. chris’ lips meet mine again, and i hardly notice him removing his plaid pants, palming himself through his underwear and groaning into my mouth.
“is this okay? do you want to do this?” he asks, rubbing sweet circles on my inner thigh. how could i say no to him? we’re way beyond that.
i nod in affirmation, “more than okay, i want you, chris,”
chris smiles and swiftly pulls me to the edge of the bed, peeling away his last layer of clothing. his erection springs up, and i take a deep breath at just the sight of his size, tip leaking precum.
i instinctively spread my legs further for him, and he pumps himself a few times before aligning with my core, wetting himself between my folds.
he slowly pushes himself into me, and the sting of his size makes me hiss,
“i’ll go slow okay?”
i nod and close my eyes, and his forehead press against mine, pushing his dick further. i feel our hips meet and he pulls out almost all the way, before slamming into me.
fuck going slow.
i can’t control the loud moan that crawls from my lips, one from chris, “fuck,” follows soon after. his pace picks up; wet noises, skin slapping, and loud moans are the only sounds that fill the room.
he pulls himself out, and i prop myself on my elbows and give him a confused look,
“turn around,” chris grows, and i do without retaliation, sticking my ass far up in the air with my chest pressed against the mattress.
he wastes no time inserting himself back into me, going to his rhythm once again.
chris grips my hips so hard im sure they’ll be a purple hue in the morning, but that’s at the least of my concerns right now.
“god, you feel so good. you like bein a pillow princess, don’t you?” he huffs, continuously bringing our hips to meet at a pace faster than i think i can breathe.
the only way i can respond is through a muffled groan into the bunched up sheets, holding on as hard as i can.
he grabs my hair into a makeshift ponytail and pulls my head up,
“answer me. you like it, no- you love it, don’t you?”
“yes, i fucking love it chris!” i say as i gasp for oxygen, and he shoves my face back into the pillow, spewing praises and profanities into the air.
“i-i’m close baby, where should i cum? “chris says, his strokes becoming sloppier by the second, and i feel him twitch inside me, causing myself to clench around him.
“me too, shit, i-inside me, cum inside me,” i breath, way beyond fucked out to realize the consequences of those words.
with one last stroke, he releases inside me, and i feel myself become warm inside, both from him and my own cum painting his dick.
we simultaneously pant as he pulls out, and i flip myself over, feeling completely drunk off fucking him.
his body crashes down next to me, delivering sweet kisses to my face and lips, unlike his previous animalistic behavior just a few seconds ago.
“are you okay? how was that? did i hurt you?” he questions through pants, i giggle at the change in demeanor.
“i’m okay, it was perfect, and no you didn’t. i loved it, chris.” i say, running my hands gently through is slightly wet hair, some strands sticking to his forehead from the sex-sweat build up.
“i want to keep doing this,” chris starts
“me too-“
“but i want to be more,” the words leave his lips quickly, and his eyes focus between mine, analyzing my face, searching for a response.
“me too,” i state again, “but what are we going to tell nick? matt?” the idea of telling them didn’t cross my mind, but the anxiety of having to face them about that makes my heart race.
“we can keep it to ourselves— for right now,” the octave of his voice raising slightly at the end, posing his proposition almost as a question.
i smile and place a gentle kiss on his lips, “we can do that, but not for too long, okay,” i say after pulling away.
chris smiles warmly at me, “okay, but we should really go back to sleep. it’s 5:30,”
i almost get whiplash turning my head to look at the clock so fast, and i widen my eyes at how much time has passed.
“good idea,” i reply, shakily crawling back under the covers.
“you’re sleeping naked?” he questions.
“yes, is that a problem? you coming back here or not?” i raise my eyebrows at him,
chris shakes his head; “not at all, come lay on me,” he makes his way to his side and opens his arms for me, and i inch my way over into his warm grasp.
chris places a soft kiss on my forehead, and i can feel myself slowly drifting into sleep. i don’t think im going to scare the shit out of nick, my mind thinking of my previous vendetta against him; little does he know he did me a huge favor.
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healmyhrt · 6 months
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could you do Matt x reader smut where reader wears something showy to her friends birthday party and Matt gets like turned on and you can take over the rest!
⌗ crush, m. sturniolo
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matt x fem!reader
summary: matt has had a crush on you for the longest, and you’ve had strong feelings toward him too. after a summer fling with him, things turn awkward, and you both have a feeling of relief thinking that you’ll never see each other again… until your best friends birthday party.
disclaimers!: flirting, heavy making out, thigh riding, alcohol consumption, cursing, and use of y/n
a/n: guys question, is it technically “aftercare” if u don’t fuck??? like if you just js did oral shi or something idk 😣 anywho enjoy babes
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i slowly creep into the dark entry way, removing my jacket as quietly as possible. i feel a hand tap my shoulder and i grip the fingers, trying to recognize who it could be.
“y/n?” a voice whispers. it was nick.
i reach in and hug him, squeezing tightly. i can feel him smiling against me. “hey, how are you?” i whisper back.
“good, you?” he replies, holding my hand and leading me through the dark hallway. “eh, so-so. is she here yet?”
a few friends and i were throwing a surprise party for my best friend, mia, she’s turning 21.
“she’ll be here in a few, but come on, everyone’s in here.”
i enter the dining room, seeing a crowd of some familiar and unfamiliar faces, candles lit in front of them.
i scan the group, looking at everyone, when my eyes come to an abrupt stop. there he was, matthew.
his blue eyes glistened behind the candlelight, and he stared right through it, straight at me. fuck.
i tap nick as he swivels around, handing me a candle.
“what the hell is he doing here?” i question. nick looks over at matt, then back at me. “um, he knows mia?”
i roll my eyes. nicks face changes and he raises an eyebrow. “have you two still not talked since the summertime?” i shuffle in place, looking at the floor.
“no…”
nick groans. “jesus. just—sort things out tonight, okay? you two can not ruin this night for mia. got it?” he says.
i nod, and glance over at matt, who was still staring.
chris sprints into the dining room, and catching his breath before speaking. “guys, they’re here!”
we all become quiet as the front door creaks open. i look up at nick who’s looking at me, trying not to smile.
mia slowly enters the dining room, a white blindfold tied gently over her freshly curled hair. she begins to untie it, and nick looks at everyone, holding up three fingers.
“3…”
“2…”
“1…”
“SURPRISE!” we all shout, seeing mia’s face. she immediately smiles, and holds her hands to her face.
“you guys!” she beams.
everyone rushes over, hugging her uncontrollably. i step back into the hallway, freeing myself from the crowd.
i sigh, looking over and seeing matt. he gives me a small smile, and i look the other way, turning toward the stairs.
it had been about 2 hours since we surprised mia, and now the entire house was packed. the small gathering had turned into a big party.
i had stayed holed up in mia’s room, drinking, as friends came and went, bringing me more and more.
now, i wasn’t drunk. they only brought me cans of sprite with a little bit of vodka in it. thats it.
and ive only had like 3 or 4 of them.
but i knew after a while id have to pee, and eventually leave mia’s room, placing myself back into the craziness that was downstairs.
i patt my hands dry on my favorite cardigan, shutting the bathroom door behind me. stepping down the steps into the chaos, i pass by multiple people making out on the steps.
i see mia at the bottom of the steps, and it gives me a sense of direction. she sees me and smiles immediately, running into my arms. “y/n!” she beams. i grin back.
“god, i feel like i haven’t seen you all night!” she grabs my forearm, dragging me into the living room. we stumble across a couple making out on the couch.
“can we sit here?” mia questions, with a smile.
they move over, and continue. “mia, im not sitting next to a horny ass couple.” i groan. she pulls me down next to her, and displays her legs across mine. “sooooo…”
i raise an eyebrow. “so, what?” she giggles, biting her bottom lip. “did you see him?” i cross my arms.
“you invited him? god—mia!” i scoff.
she laughs. “y/n, you two need to sort things out. tonight. okay? i can’t have two of my closest friends not being able to stay in the same room as one another.”
“you sound like nick.” i reply. she smirks. “well, yeah. it was our plan all along.” i playfully push her away with a little smile.
“look, please just talk to him.” she says, giving me a look.
i sit in silence fidgeting with my fingers. she places a hand on my fingers, and i look up at her. “okay.”
she claps enthusiastically, standing. “yay, y/n!”
i laugh. “im gonna go find myself another drink. want anything?” i shake my head. she blows me a kiss, and walks off, her dress swaying gracefully with each step.
i sigh, standing up. i look over at the couple next to me.
“you guys can—y’know—do your thing.” i gesture to the sofa. they give me a thumbs up, and immediately lay down, continuing. gross.
i make my way outside, onto the front porch.
i sit, flinching at the cold pavement against the back of my thighs. my skirt was very short, and i didn’t have any tights.
the door opens and shuts behind me, and i turn around to meet a very familiar face. “matthew.” i say. “y/n.”
he walks past me, and unlocks his car. i watch him stop, and turn around. “wanna—come with?” i give him a confused expression.
“we need more ice. im just gonna run to a gas station.”
i shrug, and stand, walking over to his car. matt opens the door for me, and i give him a small smile, stepping in.
after waiting in the car for a while, matt finally exits the gas station, carrying the last bag of ice. about time.
he gets in the car, wiping his now wet hands against his jeans. “took you long enough.” i tease. matt chuckles.
“i know, usually doesn’t take me that long to get my hands this wet.” he smirks. i shake my head, looking out the window, attempting to hold my laugh in.
“let’s just go.”
the drive back was silent. (minus the ice tumbling around in the backseat.) we caught almost every red light, and matt and i would just shift in our seats, trying not to make eye contact with one another.
as we pull in the driveway. i unbuckle my seatbelt, trying to get out of this situation as quickly as possible.
“so, we aren’t gonna talk about it? at all?”
i knew it.
i turn around, and sigh. “fine. let’s talk, matt.” i say with a long stare. he clenches his jaw, and rests his hands on the steering wheel.
“we had sex. big deal.” i throw my hands up in the air dramatically. matt scoffs and looks at me, almost as if he was about to cry. “it was a big deal to me.” he stares.
i purse my lips together. “well, it doesn’t seem like it, seeing as you lack common communication skills.”
“i wanted to text you, or call you—just hear your voice at all after that night, but i was too afraid.” matt looks out the window beside him, and gently taps the steering wheel with his fingertips.
my face softens, and i slowly reach out to the place a hand on his. but before i even reach him, i pull away.
“why were you afraid, matt?” i question. i was genuinely curious to hear his answer, too. matt had gone full no contact with me after that night, all because he was afraid? it just didn’t make sense.
“because i like you.”
my eyes widened as the words left his mouth. i didn’t know what to say—how to even respond. it was insanity.
did i like matt? i mean, i guess.
no—sure—yes.
yes, i do like matt. i just get my feelings mixed up and lost in my mind. i mean, could we really work?
“y-you do?” i stutter out. matt turns around, and im left to drown in his eyes. he softly nods, and i form a smile.
i look down at my hands and begin to fidget with my rings, swallowing before i speak. “i like you too.”
i look up to see a smiling matt, and i grin back.
i sigh, looking out the window. “look at us, using the word ‘like’ to describe our feelings. what’re we, five?” i laugh, making him chuckle.
i turn back toward him, and matt immediately smashes his lips onto mine. i lean in, him caressing my cheeks.
matt swings an arm around my waist, fully pulling me onto his lap. i smile against his lips, reaching down and unbuckling his seatbelt beneath me.
matt bucks his hips up at the feeling of my fingers on him. i feel his bulge rub against my bare thigh, and he pulls away.
“s-sorry. is that weird?”
i shake my head. “not at all. it just shows that you really do like me.” i say with a smile, placing a hand on his jaw, and pulling him into me again.
matt takes off my cardigan, tossing it in the passengers seat. he places his hands on the seam of my miniskirt, and stops, pulling away. “can i?”
pushing my lips back onto his, i mumble “yes”, and matt pulls away again. i sigh irritably, and he gives me a look.
“use your words if you want this.”
i bite my bottom lip, matt’s eyes on them. i bite the inside of my cheek, and look out the window. matt places a soft hand on my jaw, turning me to look at him.
“hey, if you don’t want to do this, we can just head back inside. i’ll just be glad that we’re good again.” he smiles.
i nod, and he raises an eyebrow. “i want to do this.”
matt’s smile turns into a smirk, and he pulls my skirt up to my waist, places both hands on my ass. i smash my lips back onto his, smiling against him.
matt tightens the grip on my hips, leading them. i slowly begin to grind against his clothed bulge. matt pulls away, breathing heavily against the side of my face.
i continue, matt now kissing down my neck, struggling to contain himself. he’s practically digging his fingers into my skin, guiding my hips.
i pierce my lip with my teeth, trying to stop the moans that threatened to escape my mouth. “matt…”
“almost…” he pushes himself against me, making the sensation even more intense. my panties are probably a leaking mess on him as my eyes begin to water from the stimulation.
matt slows to a stop, and he catches his breath. i breathe heavily into his neck, my mascara smudging on his skin.
he pulls me off of him to take a look at my face.
“are you okay? was it too much?” he questions, genuine worry taking over his expression. i wipe the smudged mascara off of my face, smiling at him. “i’m okay, matt.”
he pulls me in, hugging me tightly. “i’m so glad we’re good now. i’ve missed you so much, y/n.” i grin widely.
i pull away, sniffling. we just stare at eachother, and i look down, my skirt still at my waist. “we should probably fix ourselves before we go back inside.” i say through a breathy chuckle.
“yeah.” matt replies. i climb off of his lap, pulling down my skirt in the passenger seat. matt looks down at his jeans, a wet spot on his crotch. i stifle my laughter, matt turning to look at me.
“i can’t go inside like this.” he says through a laugh.
“at least they’re dark wash denim.” i shrug, still laughing. he scoffs, and attempts to wipe it off.
“matt, it’s not going anywhere. it’ll be fine, it’s pretty dark inside anyway.” i reassure. he looks up at me, a small smile on his lips.
we climb out of the car, matt grabbing the slightly melted ice. “probably could’ve chosen a better time to do that.” he jokes.
we enter the foyer of the house, mia meeting us at the door. “soooo, are you two good now?” she asks eagerly.
i look at matt, and he gives me a smile.
“yeah, we’re good.”
346 notes · View notes
catscidr · 24 days
Text
// what's the difference between scotch and whisky anyways //
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i. note — /edit/ i said i would fix the formatting later and Now is later hi hellooo. sorry for not posting, i suddenly couldnt bring myself to write for more than five minutes at a time lmaoa ദ്ദി ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ ) but i hope the dottore enjoyers like this at the very least. rn im working on chapter 3 of fbbts and a darker, separate dottore/reader one shot and a couple of jjk fics if anyone would even be interested in reading them lol. but in the meantime, here's drunken shenanigans ft everyone's favorite war criminal ii. includes — dottore x gn!reader, webttore (beta) and omega cameos. various mentioned harbingers iii. cw — fluff, crack sorta, alcohol stuff, dottore is ooc because he's Not Sober, everyone is clingy. fun stuff yk iv. wc — 3,5k -> ao3 link
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It’s a popular stereotype that Snezhnayans are heavy drinkers, but the fact lies within the fatui. They’re shameless; whether it’s showing up to work inebriated or drinking on the job, they’ll hold onto the ‘snezhnayans have a high alcohol tolerance’ stereotype with clenched fists and a bottle at their lips. 
However, that fact only applies to the lackeys—agents that are stationed for hours on end without a break, agents that, at times, need liquid courage to face the horrors that come with the job. The Harbingers are an entirely different case. 
They balance each other, in a way. Where Tartaglia can down three shots of fire water and come out virtually unscathed, Damselette would rather not be caught within a hundred meters of a drop of alcohol. Where The Knave occasionally enjoys a glass of wine in her office, The Balladeer sneers at the choice of drink. 
None came together to go out for drinks, if not because of their job taking up a lot of time out of their days. No, none of the Harbingers were really close enough to let themselves be seen so vulnerable, if one dared drink themselves to the point of being unable to walk in a straight line. 
Thus, there had only been rumors circulating the halls of Zapolyarny palace. Hushed speculations spoken between coworkers, told with an air of excitement. No one has ever seen their Lords in a state other than wholly glorious, so it’s only human nature to wonder just what they would be like if their dignity were knocked down a peg—how they would be if they indulged in simple human vices. 
There are two kinds of Harbingers; ones that lack any rumors about their drinking habits, and ones that are so intriguing that if you were to strike up a conversation with a fatui agent, you would start theorizing about what kind of drunk they’re like before saying hello. Tartaglia and The Knave are part of the former, along with The Rooster and The Fair Lady. The latter consists of (unsurprisingly) The Balladeer, our sweet Damselette, and the two big shots at the top. 
Rumors of The Captain’s drinking habits are usually quite short-lived. People either have too much respect for him to speculate about something as childish as how he acts when he’s had too much to drink, or fear him too much to risk spreading rumors. 
But regarding The Doctor... 
It’s no secret that, even if he is eccentric and has a penchant for unconventional research methods, he has quite the loyal following. Agents will rally to defend him if they hear anyone slandering him, insisting that he’s reasonable and logical. ‘If you simply do your job, you have nothing to worry about’ is what they’d say. 
Although he’s amassed his fair share of fans within the fatui, they’re unlike The Captain’s loyal following; The Doctor’s subordinates are the first to whisper theories about their boss’ drinking habits. He’s only part human now, so maybe alcohol doesn’t affect him the way it does normal people like Tartaglia. Oh, but he seems the type to need to unwind occasionally, so maybe he has a secret stash of wine somewhere in his office? What if, in his free time, he creates various concoctions and cocktails to drink? 
Seeing as he understands science deeper than anyone else, mixology should be a walk in the park for a scientist as lucrative as him. 
Wrong. 
“Shouldn’t you be working?” 
The glare sent your way is nothing short of vicious. There stood in front of you one of his segments, the one with the infamous short fuse. “Why are you here?” 
You internalize the sigh you want to let out, deciding against making him mad when it seems he can’t even stand straight for longer than a few seconds. 
“Lord Pantalone dismissed me early.” You strategically omit why he let you go in the first place. “Where’s Prime?” 
As per anything retaining to Il Dottore, your relationship was unconventional at best. The term closest to what you were, if you wanted to describe said relationship, would be lovers—but... not quite? Still. Neither you nor Dottore cared enough to put a clear label on it, so you’ve resorted to letting people speculate— it can be quite entertaining to listen to people guess while being loud and wrong, anyways. 
You used to work under him as one of his many researchers. When you both started taking your relationship seriously, he threw in the idea of promoting you to being his personal assistant; that way he could (give you special treatment) have someone more competent than his last assistant take care of “menial tasks” like his tedious paperwork. 
You refused the generous offer, insisting that it would be unprofessional to work under him as his partner. After many late-night discussions (and stubborn headbutting of differing opinions) you both have come to an agreement in which you would work for Lord Pantalone as a financial planner. 
(You finally managed to convince him by bringing up how you could, hypothetically, pull some strings on your end in his favor—that you could persuade Pantalone to allot more funding for his research. If he had any shame left, it would have been embarrassing how quickly he shook your hand to accept your conditions.) 
Now, while you spent most of your time in an office in The Regrator’s office building near the Palace, you occasionally came by to drop off documents. Of course, you would use your short trips as an excuse to go see Dottore (even if you could do so at any time anyways, given how much authority he had.) 
However, sometimes you just want to work. 
You’ll leave the comfort of your cubicle to go see him and the extensions of himself, sure, but you still had a job to do. Papers piled up, clients grew impatient, and even your boss wasn’t immune to their nasty attitude whenever he held a meeting with a particularly irritating client. Thus, sometimes you wished you could truly focus, lose track of time and work until your wrist forced you to take a break. 
This wouldn't happen today, clearly. Seeing as one of Dottore’s lackeys rushed to your office to bring you to the Haeresys, you most likely won’t be seeing your desk until further notice. 
Now you were stuck with a cryptic Beta, trying your best to use what little knowledge about the clones’ machinery you managed to wring out of your stubborn lover. 
“Where’s Prime?” You run a hand over your wrinkled coat sleeve, keeping your voice calm and steady. Patient, else you’d be subjected to the segment’s indignation. 
“Dunno.” 
You sigh. Is he a scientist or a child? “You do know. Where is he?” 
“I told you I don’t know!” He throws his hands up, accidentally striking his mask in the way—effectively leaving it to rest at an angle on his face. Most of his mouth showed now, instead of the half you’re used to seeing. And the holes for the eyes don’t quite go where they should... 
Blinking, you take in the sight in front of you while he calms down. His crimson eyes were glassy, and his lips formed a permanent pout, vastly out of character for a segment that supposedly represented The Doctor at the most volatile stage of his life. Azure locks curled around his cheeks, though they were usually tucked out of the way. His clothes were all wrinkled, in a way that left you wondering if you shouldn’t tend to him instead. Dealing with his attitude is annoying, but it’ll be amusing to think about later, I guess. 
“Do you really not know...?” 
“No.” 
“Then, do you know why I was called to the lab?” 
“No. Yes... probably not. Uh,” he crosses his arms over his chest and loses his balance for just a second, “I think I do.” 
You raise an inquisitive brow, silently encouraging him to continue. 
“Give me a second.” Beta shuts his eyes, shoulders slumping. His mask was still crooked—you had half a mind to fix it, but held back the twitch in your fingers. After a few seconds he pipes up, uncrossing his arms to reach out to you. 
“Come.” 
The segment grabs your wrist and drags you into the hallways of the Palace, ignoring your yelp of surprise and the stares of various agents lingering in the halls. You pass by ornate statues and paintings, the sight more unfamiliar than not. 
“Beta, where are we-” 
“Hush, I can’t walk when you’re talking my ear off.” 
...Right. Something is definitely wrong. 
After about five minutes of running around like headless chickens you tug your arm back, making Beta turn around indignantly. You lift your hands up in front of you before he can speak. 
“Did you mean to bring me to Lady Signora’s office?” you ask, lips curled up into a small smile seeing his mask still laid crooked on his face. With a gentle hand you fix it, cold fingers grazing his burning cheek. 
“...” 
Beta’s brows furrow as he avoids your gaze, huffing dramatically. Poor guy, you mused. 
“Alright, let’s go to the lab, then. He must be there, right? Where was Prime last time you saw him?” 
“...his office, probably,” he murmurs. 
With a nod and a smile akin to someone doing some gentle parenting, you place a hand on his back and help guide him to Haeresys. The stairs were hard to walk down, but with just a bit of patience and a bit of Beta clutching your arm while shouting that you were trying to assassinate him, you make it down in one piece. 
You remove your gloves and place your palm into the scan, then input the lengthy password to open the laboratory’s large doors. They slide open, revealing the absence of normal researchers and noise. You spot Omega standing over the remains of a ruin machine with a clipboard in his hands and look back towards Beta. 
“Go sit, I’ll go ask Omega about Prime’s whereabouts.” 
The clone nods, trudging his legs along to lay down on the leather couch tucked away in the lab. 
As you put away your large coat and hang it up in the small rack near the doors and make your way towards Omega, you notice the slow rhythm of his handwriting—when he’s usually seemingly speedrunning writing down notes, he’s now leisurely writing away, unaware of your presence. 
“Omega.” 
The latter turns to you, masking his surprise with a small smile instead. “My dear,” he practically purrs, putting away the clipboard in a swift movement, placing the pen in his coat pocket. 
“I was alerted that something was... off, with Prime. Do you know where he is?” 
And where you thought Omega would pick up on Beta’s lack of decorum, you were sorely mistaken. The clone walks up to you with that same smile brightening his features, placing both hands on your shoulders oh so gently. 
“He’s in his office. But enough about him, I haven’t seen you in a while, beloved. Why must you keep me away from you?” he muses, leaning down to press a chaste kiss to your cheek. You tilt your head to avoid being stabbed by his mask’s beak, raising your hands to press against his chest to make some distance. The action proved to be futile, of course. 
We saw each other yesterday, you murmur. “I’m sorry, I’ll get back to you in a moment, alright?” You offer him a warm smile in hopes that he’ll listen, seeing as he seemed to be quite... mushy. 
It works, and he lets you go with a curt nod, retreating to go... somewhere. You didn’t linger around long enough to figure it out, since you knew where to go now. 
Walking across the lab, you note how things seemed to be more out of place than usual. It couldn’t have been a researcher, they always had to clean up after themselves, courtesy of their boss. So, the mess had to be caused by them... 
You finally stand in front of his door, raising a fist to knock. A yelp leaves you as you’re whisked away, the door slamming shut just as quickly as it swung open. 
“Dottor-” 
“Can you fucking believe how inept these agents are? They dare speak to me with such disrespect after delivering the lousiest job I’ve ever seen.” Dottore rambles, pulling you deeper into his office. You observe the state of his workspace, namely the papers scattered onto the ground and the... bottlecap on the floor, right next to his trashcan filled with crumpled up paper...? 
“Showing up in the lab with their damn hands empty save for the half empty bottle of scotch they tried to hide. Idiots were too shitfaced to notice how I noticed.” 
“Okay, Dottore, what are you-” 
He gestures wildly as he speaks, his hands the only way for you to read him as his mask hid most of his features. The blue lines taunt you; though you’re tempted to take it off, you feel like he might just lunge at you if you did. 
“And then they had the gall to insist that the bottle was theirs when I confiscated it.” Dottore pushes you down to sit on the couch, a small oof leaving you in consequence. “Anything that enters this fucking lab belongs to me, I’m the boss, I decide what flies and what does not.” 
Absolutely unaware of your muffled giggles as you piece things together, he keeps ranting, turning his back to you as he stomps away towards his desk. “Not to mention these damn lackeys have had multiple warnings up until now,” he spits out. “Lord Harbinger, we’re sorry! We’ll clean up the lab to make up for this offense! Lord Harbinger, it won’t happen again! Who do they take me for, a moron?!” 
The higher pitch he uses to imitate (and make fun of) the agents almost makes you lose it. But you keep your composure, sitting demurely, listening. 
Dottore comes back with a bottle in hand, orange liquid swirling around the thick glass as he stumbles closer to where you sat. He joins you without warning, creating a dip in the sofa next to you—almost forcing you to lean onto him for support. His free arm drapes over the back as he sighs loudly, making you stifle a laugh behind your hand. 
A pregnant pause stretches between the two of you as his anger simmers down to embers. You lean forward, attempting to take a look at the label on the bottle in his hand. 
“What’re you holding there, love?” you ask sweetly. Glancing up you’re able to steal a peek at his eyes from underneath his dark mask—Archons was he absolutely gone. 
It takes him a second to respond, almost as if he forgot you were even there in the first place. 
“Whisky.” 
“I thought it was scotch.” 
“Same thing.” 
“No it isn’t.” 
“Yes it is.” 
“No it’s n-” 
“It is.” 
Maybe it wasn't the brightest thing to do, messing with him while he’s this inebriated. But it sure was entertaining. 
“Alright. Well, how much did you drink?” 
“A sip or two.” 
As if on cue, he brings the bottle up to his lips and takes a swig. Your grin widens, thoroughly entertained by the show; who else had the privilege of seeing The Doctor so drunk he could barely formulate something that made sense? 
You bring his attention back on you as you place a hand on his knee, leaning close. Dottore immediately snaps into place, gaze flickering down to your lips from the proximity. 
With a swift hand you grab the scotch from his hands, inspecting the amount still left in the bottle. If he said it was half empty when he confiscated it, then... 
“Dearest, did you drink a quarter of this bottle?” You're not even supposed to drink it straight from the bottle, either is what you wished to add, but seeing how defensive he was already, you figured it would just make things more complicated than they needed to be.
As if stung by the Tsaritsa’s delusion, he immediately stiffens and defends himself. “I did not, I told you I only had a sip.” 
The way his bottom lip jutted out was almost cute, if you dared to describe him in such a way. Compliments could wait though; you had answers to seek. 
“Mhm, a sip. Well,” you put the bottle down on a coaster on the coffee table and turn to face him properly, “what happened to the segments? They’re all a little... woozy.” Your fingers trail his arm, tracing circles in their wake. 
Dottore swallows, Adam's apple bobbing as he opens his mouth to speak. “We’re connected, albeit loosely. They could be affected by the few sips of scotch I drank, though I would have some work cut out for me if that were the case. I can’t let them be so weak after all.” 
The way he spoke sounded, for lack of better words, pouty. 
Was he... sulking? 
“And since we’re connected, I know you spoke to Beta ‘n Omega earlier.” 
He most definitely is. He's even slurring his words, now...
“Yeah? I was asking them where you were so I could check up on you, baby.” You chuckle softly, taking the liberty of putting his mask away. Bright, glassy red eyes stare down into you, and you hold back the urge to smother his face in kisses. 
“You didn’t have to talk to them, you could have just asked me.” 
“I was looking for you, so I couldn’t have.” 
“Why not?” 
You scoff, smiling as you adjust yourself on the couch. Dottore notices and takes the liberty of pushing you down, laying his head down so his ear is on your chest, cheek pressed up into you. “I’m sorry, I’ll ask you next time,” you respond. 
That satisfies him, enough to render him silent for a handful of seconds before he speaks up again. 
“...I need to get back to work,” he huffs. 
You bring a hand up and run it through his disheveled locks, careful not to tug at the small knots in the hair at the back of his neck. Twirling the hair of his mullet you hum, noting how his weight seemed to grow heavier as the seconds passed. No way is he going to get any work done if he falls asleep here. 
“Take a break, you deserve it. In the meantime, you can think of a suitable way to punish those stupid agents from earlier, right?” 
A quiet hum is all you get in response. You look down expecting to see his unnerving red eyes to be staring up at you, but you’re met with the sight of his features completely lax instead. Azure hair pools around his face, settling on your chest where his face rose in time with your breaths. 
You would have dimmed the lights and turned off his computer if you knew he was going to keep you hostage on the couch. Though you can’t really complain at the turn of events; it’s rare for Dottore to be the one to initiate skinship in the relationship. 
It was quiet, but you managed to hear the low dear? that left his lips. You hum, not wanting to speak as to not break the quiet atmosphere lulling you to a sense of peace. 
After a minute of silence, you decide to repeat yourself—this time a little louder than before. “What is it?” 
Another minute passes, just as quiet as the last. The sound of his slow, deep breaths fills the room, accompanied by the low scratches of your nails on his scalp. His hair parts where your fingers tread through it, and you quietly note that you should trim his hair soon. 
Il Dottore’s poor alcohol tolerance will always be a mystery to the public, because there’s no way you would ever let anyone in on the way he cuddles up to you when he’s had too much to drink. 
201 notes · View notes
meruz · 2 months
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hi!! im sure ppl have asked this b4, but i scoured your asks tag for an hour or so looking to see if you answered anything abt it and couldnt find anything, so i was just wondering if youve made any posts on your process for making n selling merch b4? and how you know which franchises you can make merch for w/o getting into trouble w copyright n trademark stuff (hopefully that makes sense, im not sure,,,)
hi! got a bunch of asks abt merch stuff lately im gonna put it under a cut.
preface: i don't know if i'm the best person to ask about all this stuff because I'm doing merch on a strictly hobby basis LOL. I have a fulltime job which takes care of the bulk of my finances, I don't really make big quantities of anything and my main priority at cons is to just make enough money to see my friends in different cities at minimal expense. i pretty much always get a refund when i file my con taxes because my profit after all the deductions is like fucking..nothing.. lmao. So if you ultimately lose money following my advice don't blame me. OK NOW lets get into it
my process for making merch: when I have an event scheduled that I want to make merch for I start by brainstorming a bunch of stuff I wanna make. for mgscon this is what I wrote down in my sketchbook lol
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i made a legend to denote which ones are actually just reprints. it gets easier to plan out merch when you already have merch. out of the new merch ideas here i actually only made like 4 of them. and out of the reprints i only reprinted like three. i also came up with like 4-5 other merch ideas after writing out this list that i actually did do. LMAOO UM. my point here is that nothing rly goes as planned.
when i get a merch idea i start with thumbnails what i want it to look like (sometimes this is based off merch ive seen before so its very realized and sometimes its really vague bc im kind of pulling it out of my ass)
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then BEFORE i go into making the final art I research how I'm going to make the merch. whether its printing/constructing it myself or looking for a manufacturer. There's a lot of different places that you can get custom merch made, i used to go shopping around at local printing shops but nowadays it's really common to do it all online. For both these jet tags and the washi tape I did some of my own research into manufacturers and also asked friends for their contacts/referrals/recommendations etc. most manufacturers either have their specs/template publicly available or will give them to you when you ask. so once I've locked into a manu and gotten the specs I'll start designing the final art.
then it's sending it off and waiting! easier said than done.
i will say this process is a lot lengthier for some types of merch than others LOL. for prints... I've been doing prints for like a million years and I plan out almost none of it. I draw everything at print resolution so a week before I have a con scheduled I'll simply go through all the files I've accumulated since my last con, squeeze whatever drawings I want into standard print sizes lol (ie. 8.5x11, 11x17, 4x6 etc), and print them at a local shop. takes like a couple hours max.
how you know which franchises you can make merch for w/o getting into trouble w copyright n trademark stuff?
I mean. honestly I don't know. selling fanart is the kind of thing that IP holders kind of just let slide as long as they don't think they're losing a substantial amt of money on it. there ARE a couple franchises people avoid because they've been known to send IP lawyers after fanartists... disney is the big one and they're known for being pretty petty abt it... that's why you don't really see people selling fanart of the disney princesses at cons. ive heard pokemon will also crack down if your project seems to be making a lot of money lol, part of why i think a lot of pokemon fanzines operate on a charity basis. I do feel like the pokemon company has bigger fish to fry than someones artist alley table though so i wouldn't sweat it too much.
it's also generally considered impolite/bad taste to sell fanart of small franchises. webcomics and indie games especially if they only have like 1-2 devs who rely on the income that game makes.
I'm not a lawyer so you shouldn't consider this legal advice BUT I will say... I don't think you should let IP law stop you from selling fanart lol. especially if it's low quantities/not mass produced and you're not making crazy amts of money I think you kind of have a leg to stand on. Besides, most cases it seems like the worst you'll get is a cease and desist.
you Will notice that when people start turning their artist alley endeavors into a real business they'll generally ease up on selling fanart (the case most prominent in my mind is omocat lol). but i love fanart and thats why i will never make money and thats a promise [snake saluting gif]
SORRY IDK IF ANY OF THIS WAS HELPFUL. I've been doing merch and cons for a long time (10+ years lmao, you can find record of this on this very blog) and i think im kind of old fashioned about it. i recognize the artist alley/merch scene is a lot more demanding now than it used to be but start small at local low-risk events, online sales etc and work your way up and remember to have fun and itll be ok i believe this wholeheartedly.
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its literally just layers of acrylic like any other dinky charm. I'm sure pretty much any manu that does acrylic charms could do it but this specific charm/template i did order through a group order server. they're pretty well known! heres a link to their twitter
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@wheatormeat sorry for taking a full month to answer this... anyways. This is tricky because I've actually been changing up my sticker manu everytime LOL IDK if I've found one I actually love.
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these ones i ordered thru an alibaba manu because I was jumping on a friend's group order to save on shipping. it was ok. they arrived a liiiitle late and printed a lil dark but i think thats kind of my fault LOL I use dark colors i always need to lighten things before i get them printed and i think i just didnt lighten these enough. otherwise i rly love the quality!
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i realized i never posted these online and also this is not a good picture (the lighting in my living room sucks rn) but i printed these tmnt stickers thru stickerninja they feel really solid but they needed kind of a lot of space for the cutline. but their customer service was very nice and helpful!
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these ones i got printed at washimill and i was so impressed with how fine their cutline is... pricing and quality of the sticker itself is alright they feel a lil flimsy? idk. but i do like the printing. i kind of elected to go with them solely because i was already ordering washi tape. A LOT of my manufacturing decisions are made based on how much money i can save on shipping tbh.
and thats my sticker manu reviews dont forget to like comment subscribe idk if i have one im gonna stick with forever or anything im rly indecisive. ideally id like a manu based in the u.s...? because im based in the u.s. and international shipping is pricey. but idk if i keep ordering washi tape maybe ill keep using washimill. who knows...
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opal-owl-flight · 2 months
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Can you please tell us more about Neo4. What's their background.
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“I need your help.”
Thing is -- I dont exactly own that character! Hes owned by @pastille-pain ... I asked them abt his deets, so here it is under the readmore!
His recruitment by 3 is also under the readmore :) (+more notes abt pre-sploon3)
(From my pal)
My Precious Soy Sauz
Aka croissant
Where he comes from is inkopolis
Lived there his whole life actually. A very sheltered kid due to being raised by grandparents that were in Octaria at one point. So they wanted to make sure nothing really happened to him
An only child but he had his cousin (Nakji, Takoyaki) of the three, he'd be the middle child with Nakji and the youngest.
He's got two friends (three if we count malachite -- the smallfrt) outside of the platoon. Dulce, and (unfortunately) Scara
He dating Melon (oc of mine), we know this
Kinda funny it started as her just battling with him cause he was good but then it turned something more
His time before the platoon was mostly
"Hey are you related to that Sauz idol?" Or "hey, you related to that Sauz wrestler?" It got annoying very quickly so he started introducing himself as croissant and nothing else
Aside from that, if he wasn't turfing he was at home reading or watching shows. Guys a very boring person
He's a pretty big OTH fan...
All this above is still the same even while being apart of the platoon minus the constant questions about his relatives and adding college into the mix
He can do some really cool shit when he's focused (like absolutely demolish competition in turf) but he's also easily distracted so I think you can imagine how that goes
His stress relief is shopping (mostly window shopping, very rarely does he actually buy anything)
He never gets too mad but we know the face if he does
Fun fact, you will never catch this man in pants
Short and anything else
Not pants
The only time he's ever seen wearing pants is in his agent gear and that's cause it's what was given to him.
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Heres a bonus too, of 3s recruitment of him!
It was a turfing match, and theyve been watching the krak-on user the whole round. They took note of how he responded to stress, to bad calls, and how he acted on his own following calls he had judged as bad. Once it was over, they followed the team into the lobby.
They stand tall against the doorframe theyre leaning against, presence as cold and as commanding as ever.
(Nevermind that Croissant is taller AND older than them, that squid is intimidating as FUCK)
A whistle, calling the team over.
"|May I have a word?|" they sign, "|Ive been watching your team turf for the last few rounds.|"
Scara, the team captain, spits a "Who the FUCK are you."
3s eyebrows raise in surprise. But they should expect it... casual turfers dont usually know their name.
They went to the smaller leagues for a reason. If something happened to a big name in the scene, and its found that they had something to do with it-
No. No. They mentally shake their head. They are NOT picking this person because they are going to be fucking canon fodder.
"|Who I am is not important. Not much, anyway.
I am... interested in one of your teammates.|"
a nod towards Croissant. "|As a krak-on user myself, his performance has impressed me.|"
"Has he now. You seen our losses?? Are you making fun of us??"
"|He has great potential.|" they sign, ignoring the outburst. "|I would like to...|" theres a slight pause. "|...train with him.|"
"I can train my team perfectly, all by myself. Get lost."
They give a cold stare back. "|Im sure that has worked very well for you thus far.|"
The captain didnt seem to want to back down. 3 continues, ear twitching.
"|This request was not aimed towards you, anyway. Im asking him.|"
"BUT-"
"|I want to hear HIS answer.|"
A test. 3 saw that Scara was pushing him around and the only reason they won the match was bc Croissant decided to go his own way. Will he go his own way now?
"Well I know he'll choose to stick with me-"
"Oh I'd love to train with you I like helping others :D"
"You weren't supposed to say that."
3 nods. "|It begins now. Come. We have much to discuss. And as for you.|"
They clack their beak. "|Captain to captain. You need to listen to your teammates more.|"
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Once they are in a more private space...
"|Training is only one part of the deal.
I apologize for not being upfront. This is a matter of national security, and I cannot mention much about it beyond base.|"
I suppose Croissant hasnt heard...or at least, isnt into much of the so-called Hero of Inkadia thats plastered everywhere in Inkopolis? If he was, hed at least start thinking of all that being like... "wait all that media was based on something real???"
(3 mentioning national security and a base may also inspire thoughts of "wow this squid's a fucking nerd...")
"|You are free to reject my request if you feel unfit for the task at hand. But where are my manners? I have yet to formally introduce myself.
Topside, I am known as FOR3VRFRSH. Here, I am the Captain of the New Squidbeak Splatoon.
I suppose youve heard of such a force...? No?|
Mm.
|Just know that we keep Inkadia more or less safe from nation-destroying threats.|"
He accepts the offer... but he also wasn't thinking too hard on it cause he saw an opportunity to step away from Scara and took it immediately.
3 nods, beckoning him towards the sewer line. As they walked backwards into base, they signed to him. "|From this point onwards, you will be referred to as Agent...Four.|"
Theres a very slight waver of their hand as they signed the number.
"|You show much promise, from what Ive observed in turf. Dont disappoint me.|"
"The only person I disappoint is that guy, but he's just very critical-"*
Theres a glint in 3s eye, a look of amusement... "|...Overly critical is putting it lightly.|"
"I promise to do my best still."
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3 introduces him as the new Agent 4 and I feel Marie just scrunches her nose a bit. Then sees the look in 3s eye...
To the folks from the regions around 3s home (Callie, Marie, Cuttlefish), theyre not subtle about missing her.
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thefreakandthehair · 11 months
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@eddiemonth prompt, oct 17th: Oct 17th: Tolkien | Ramble On - Led Zeppelin | Intelligent a/n: hospital setting, painkillers, post-canon fix-it, eddie & nancy friendship, steddie. un-betaed because I'm challenging myself to write these in under an hour. read on ao3 + masterpost | tumblr masterlist
today's prompt is a lost scene from day 6's prompt, crush:
Nancy figured it out when Eddie was in the hospital, still a little loopy from painkillers and who knows what else.  You were on another planet and couldn’t stop talking about his chest hair, Eddie.
Nancy Wheeler sits in the little white chair next to Eddie Munson’s hospital bed, the rhythmic beeping of his heart monitor the only noise keeping her company. Well, that, and the sound of her own voice, softly reading The Fellowship of the Ring while Eddie dozes. 
They’ve taken turns, the older teens and a few of the kids, oscillating back and forth between Max’s room and Eddie’s room to ensure no one is left alone for too long while Wayne and Susan are at work. Hospital bills aren’t cheap and while the government will most likely reimburse them for their troubles, right now, things are tight. 
It’s Nancy’s turn in Eddie’s room tonight, picking up where Wayne’s left off in Eddie’s favorite book. Worn and well-read, the book’s loose spine allows Nancy to let it rest on her thigh as she flips through the pages: 
“But long ago he rode away, and where he dwelleth none can say; for into darkness fell his star, in Mordor where the shadows are," Nancy reads, glancing up when she sees Eddie begin to squirm. 
“Mordor,” Eddie murmurs, his voice slurring a bit from the painkillers. “You know, Led Zeppelin wrote a song with Mordor in it.” 
“Oh, did they?” She’s seen him like this a few times now, barely present but speaking in a stream of consciousness. Sometimes, it’s about Dungeons and Dragons. Sometimes, it’s about music, or books– his underappreciated intelligence shines through even the strongest of IV drugs. 
And sometimes, it’s about Steve. That one had been a surprise at first, but keeps all of his ramblings secret, unsure of what he’s telling the others. It’s best to simply indulge him, she’s learned. He never remembers anyways. 
“Mhm,” he cracks open one eye and grins before he starts to sing. “In the darkest depths of Mordor, I met a girl so fair.”
Before she can respond, Eddie continues in his drug-addled haze. “In the darkest depths of Mordor, I met Steve. Sweet, sweet Steve. Steve and his chest hair. Ever notice how hairy he is?” 
Nancy shakes her head and purses her lips, bemused. “I did, yeah, I was there, remember?” 
“Nope,” Eddie says with a pop. “But I do remember that jungle he calls a chest.” 
She snorts back a laugh and tries to subtly hide it behind her hand. Eddie doesn't notice, simply stares through half-lidded eyes and falls back against the pillows. 
“But Gollum and the evil one crept up and slipped away with her-er, her-er,” he continues to sing and wax poetic. 
Eddie’s heart monitor begins to speed up. “Where is Steve, actually? Is he okay?” 
Nancy smiles, fond and knowing, and places a hand on top of his. “He’s fine, he’ll be here later.” 
Sometimes, Eddie forgets how much time has passed from that awful day in Forest Hills, that Steve’s healed up and visits three times a week. That sometimes, Steve visits outside of their established rotation, just because. She never begrudges having to remind him though. How could she when she gets to see the relief drip from his face when he hears again that Steve’s okay? 
Eddie lays back again, the measured beats of his heart monitor returning to a comfortable, predictable tempo. Nancy picks the book back up and continues to read until she sees the steady rise and fall of his chest beneath the white sheets. 
“Hey,” a familiar voice whispers from the doorway. Nancy turns to see Steve standing there, leaning against the frame. “How’s he holdin’ up?” 
“Hey,” she smiles. “He was a little out of it earlier from the medication, but he’s been asleep for a few minutes now. I’ve just been reading to him, if you wanna pick up where I left off.” 
Nancy closes the book with the ribbon inside to hold the page and stands, clearing the chair for Steve. “He’s all yours.” 
As the steel door closes behind her, she hears Steve’s voice begin reading. 
‘Is there no escape then?’ said Frodo, looking round wildly. ‘If I move I shall be seen and hunted! If I stay, I shall draw them to me!’
Strider laid his hand on his shoulder. ‘There is still hope,’ he said. ‘You are not alone.’
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swanshapedheart · 3 months
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Poorlittlekoi’s statement
Disclaimer. I, the poster, am not Koi
I am someone putting her thoughts and response to her situation into the public as I was encouraged to do so. I feel it is also necessary to bring this up as well.
I do not want to be affiliated with controversy any further.
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“this whole situation has messed with my head to the point where i cant even send a text to most people without worrying they are gonna leak it or use it against me in the future,, svlvnsore was just bored and found me really annoying shown in screenshot one…. not only that they also called me out for heavily referencing or tracing when they reposted an artpiece thats doing the same thing. Svlvn said they are on my ass because i didnt credit who i referenced, when the person they reposted didnt do the same either proof in screenshot two three and four. Another thing i caught on to is that they SPECIFICALLY said they didnt care that i self harmed or did horrible things to myself when they posted about me. i have anxiety, i overthink! of course im going to do bad things to myself, im mentally unwell. proof in screenshot 5… and for screenshot 6, this is only an assumption, but saying that svlvn "didnt know" is something that really throws me off. when someone makes a callout post on someone else, there will OBVIOUSLY be harassment. thats just my thought, i feel like they knew what they were doing since him and his bf arent very good people either. especially holding onto old dms and gathering them up to use it against me, when they could have handled the situation privately with me, rather than hide it behind my back.
all of this could have been prevented if they handled it differently, and that goes for me as well.
im fully aware im in the wrong, but these people are wrong in some places too. and i want people to realize that.
many artists in tcc trace, reference, all the time. i dont understand why im slandered for heavily referencing something, not tracing. theres proof of an artist doing this FROM THE ORIGINAL ARTIST BTW in my dms right now but i dont get them involved
am i handling this situation immaturely? maybe, but arent they doing the same by harassing me? absolutely.
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when it comes to someone being racist/homophobic, people feel the need to harass this person to make them feel worse about what they did. this isnt how you handle a situation. harassing someone to the point they attempt suicide is just as bad as what i did, possibly even worse.
now i have recover slowly until i have the chance to even feel comfortable with myself again. i understand what i said and did was wrong, and im sitting here attempting to change and apologize to the people ive offended and hurt, but throwing that apology under the rug and making it seem like im guilt tripping is ridiculous.
so they cant say i didnt try to apologize, but nobody is guaranteed to accept my apology and thats okay. but putting it out there as if im guilt tripping when im giving reasons why i said it is not even giving me a chance to change
when it comes to growing up with a HUGE racist family, these words and beliefs become apart of my vocabulary and thoughts. its very hard to change that especially when i was always told "its just a word" and i hear it daily! growing up with these slurs has become so normal for me to say it just slips out with no worry, but ofc im seen as guilt tripping when i say this.
its different for each person, i saw a comment saying they grew up in a southern family and they dont say it, but thats them, not me.
people at school and during family events would peer pressure me into saying this slurs multiple times because they found it "funny." i slowly believed that as well.
i was a young teen being taught the wrong things, and seeing other people in tcc say it made me feel like i should say it as well to fit in and be edgy, since thats what the community is like
this situation is another lesson for me to learn, but other people in it need to learn that harassing someone isnt okay, either. especially when im trying to change, it doesnt make it any easier.”
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THE KNIFE I TURN WITHIN MYSELF IV (Rafe Cameron x Reader)
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word count: 4.5k
WARNINGS: DUB-CON at times, STEPCEST (sorry lol), drug abuse/self harm, depression, smut eventually I(T IS HERE)!!!! 18+ ONLY PLEASE
Summary: Kildare’s Kook Princess is forced to return home to the Outer Banks for the first time in two years since abruptly leaving for college. Unable to hold yourself together any longer, you’re forced to come face to face with the home and family you left behind and the boy you so desperately tried to forget
writes note: ahahahaha I am SO SO SO sorry to leave u guys hanging i absolutely hate when people do it only for me to turn around and do it too 🤡🤡🤡 18 breakdowns, one psychward trip and 6 months later PART FOUR IS HERE
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You had successfully spent the last few weeks avoiding Rafe, choosing to spend your time with Sarah and the pogues at the Chateau, effectively distracting you from the ongoing turmoil that raged within you. You couldn’t avoid him forever, especially not with Midsummer’s coming up. You had missed the last two, and your mom and Ward had made it perfectly clear that your attendance with the family this year was mandatory. Ward had finally returned home, your little family was together again.
Unbeknownst to you, Rafe was allowing you to avoid him. He knew all had to do was get you alone, and you’d give in to him eventually and as much as he hated the wait, he knew that once Midsummer’s arrived, you would be his again just like you were all those years ago. Rafe knew you well enough to know that his indifference toward you would relieve you at first, before inevitably sending you back to him, willing and desperate for his attention. It’s a sick game, he knew, one he had never hoped to play with you, but your determination to keep your distance was starting to piss him off, so he decided to play the long game. Rafe just wanted you back in his arms, cumming around his cock, where you belonged.
You had found it weird that Rafe hadn’t been pestering you after you left his bed the next morning, your stomach constantly filled with unease as you waited for the other shoe to drop. To others, it would seem as if he was avoiding you but you knew Rafe well enough to know that was not the case. Rafe was consistent and persistent at least when it came to you, so the silence from him had you constantly on edge, and the coke definitely didn’t help.
Sarah and Kie had brought you to the Mainland for dress shopping , an activity you once enjoyed, whereas now you wished to be anywhere else. They both dragged you from shop to shop, nothing ever catching your eye, as they exchanged glances between each other about you.
“So, any idea what color you want to wear?” Sarah asked, nibbling on the fries on her plate as you all ate lunch choosing to take a break from shopping.
“Mmmh not really no, it doesn’t really matter to me.” You responded as you pushed around your salad, opting to play with your food instead of eating it. You couldn’t find the energy to eat let alone engage with Sarah or Kie, not when your mind kept wandering back to a certain Midsummer’s, a few years ago. You smiled weakly, finally trying, “Whatever makes my boobs look good.”
Sarah giggled, happy to see you finally emerging. “Please, your boobs would look good in a turtleneck.”
You and Kie snickered with her, knowing it was true, you had well.. ahem… always been extra blessed in that department.
Eventually, the three of you had made your way back to downtown wandering the cobblestoned streets, gazing into the windows of the shops. A red dress caught your eye from across the street, sparking a light in you that hadn’t been seen for months. Up close it was a deep red, adorned in ruffles on the bodice and sleeves, and it was sheer with a middle split. Very sheer. Not stopping to even check if Sarah and Kie were behind you, entering the shop with determination as you scanned for a worker, eyes zeroing on her when you found one.
“I would like that dress, the red one? In the window, please?” You asked, pointing at the dress, smiling at the sales lady who in turn nodded back to you, making her way to the display.
You sighed happily and clasped your hands together turning to see Kie and Sarah were in fact behind you. Kie looked at Sarah amused as Sarah looked at you with a confused look.
“It’s a beautiful dress, but you know you can’t wear that right? Rose and dad would have a fit! It’s literally see through!” Sarah whispered to you, Kie laughed rolling her eyes with you.
“Sarah, who cares, if I have to go to an event I don’t want to attend in the first place, I’ll wear whatever the hell I want.” You told her, as the sales woman returned with your dress in hand and began ringing you up.
“Whatever, good luck getting that past Dad.” She sighed in defeat, walking away to wait for you outside.
“I think your boobs will look great!” Kie gave you a thumbs up, backing away to join Sarah.
Truth was you knew it would turn a few heads, everyone’s really, but there was only one head whose attention you wanted even if you weren’t ready to admit it to yourself. The dress was trouble and it was sure to cause a scene, you smiled as you thought to yourself . A scene in the form of a boy named Rafe Cameron.
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Midsummer’s 5 years ago
All humiliation aside you were having the time of your life. You were upset at first, being stood up was something you hadn’t ever hoped to experience but every girl has her day. None of that seemed to matter after Rafe rushed to your side ensuring you wouldn’t step through the doors alone. You both were dancing with each other giggling drunk earning the disappointed stares of your parents as Rafe spun you in circles. You stumbled almost falling down if it weren't for Rafe, quickly catching you pulling you to his body. You closed your eyes, inhaling the scent of the sandalwood cologne you gifted him for his birthday. Smiling, you looped your arms around his neck, resting your head on his shoulder, trying to remain standing.
“I think someone had a little too much champagne,” Rafe teased, holding you in his arms, your body already starting to fall limp as you began to fall asleep on him, the drool on his tux, as evidence.
“Uhhh-uhhh,” you slurred, forcing your eyes wide open in an attempt to wake up. You looked up at Rafe drunkenly, as he beamed down back at you, amusement evident in his eyes. You giggled sleepily, “I know what could wake me up…?”
On any other night, Rafe would have immediately said no and had taken you home, but he was drunk and high himself, his own judgment lapsed.
“Only a little?”
“Only a little.” You confirmed, pulling him upstairs, ignoring the glares of passing patrons, as you both ran to an unused bathroom on the third floor, hand in hand.
You pulled him in, locking the door behind you as he shook his head at you in an amused disbelief, all while pulling the bag of cocaine from his tux pocket.
“Is this what you want?” Rafe mocked, holding it over your head out of reach, laughing when you began to pout.
You pulled at his tux jacket with both hands pulling him towards you. “Don’t tease me, it’s mean.”
The energy in the air shifted as you both looked at each other in a mix of amusement and adoration. You looked at Rafe, smiling softly at how handsome he looked in his tuxedo. The powder blue tux complimented his eyes in more ways than one, and he simply looked angelic. If Lucifer walked the Earth in disguise, you’d find him in the form of Rafe Cameron. An angel and demon rolled into one. Rafe was always beautiful, but tonight he was the most beautiful boy in all of Midsummer’s in your mind. All the girls wanted him, and he blew them all off to be with you. By your side right where he belongs , you drunkenly thought to yourself, sliding your hands up his shoulders.
Rafe gazed down at you, his chest beaming with pride and love. When he beat the shit out of Alex, threatening him to stand you up he never thought it would lead to this. Rafe had always known he loved you, and that it was anything but brotherly, you two were made for each other and he’d spend a lifetime waiting for you to see that. You just needed time, and Rafe wanted to give you that, but tonight was the night he was gonna make sure you knew how much he loved you.
With Rafe distracted in his thoughts, you had taken the opportunity to reach up to snake the coke bag out of his hands dangling it between your fingers.
“Is this what you want?” You mocked back, giggling at the feeling of his hands on your hips as he pulled you closer to him, adjusting you in between his legs as he leaned slightly back on the counter.
Rafe snatched the bag from your hand feeling bold, lifted you and placed you onto the counter. While moving your hair to the side he held your face in his hand, his lips brushing against your cheekbone and ear as he whispered, “Don’t move.”
You nuzzled your face into his, your lips softly grazing his as you nodded in obedience. You were starting to feel hot, hot from the alcohol, hot from the way Rafe touched you, hot from your own need for him. You didn’t know when the lines of your love for him blurred into something it shouldn’t have, but for the first time, you were aware of it.There wasn’t a single coherent thought capable of forming in your brain at the moment, you just wanted to do whatever he said.
Rafe kissed your collarbone softly, causing your flesh to erupt with goosebumps, pouring the coke onto where his lips had been only moments before. He snorted the coke before licking up the residue, your face heating up in embarrassment as a moan escaped from your throat.
“Your turn.” Rafe smirked, you were speechless as you stared at him as he undid his suit and tie, pulling it off. He grabbed the bag, placing it in your hand, and guided it to his collarbone. “Just do what I did baby, pour some right there.” He signaled to his shoulder, the ring on his finger glinting in the light.
You nodded dumbly, as you clenched your thighs as discreetly as possible, a puddle already forming in your panties, before shakily pouring the contents of the bag onto him. He nodded at you reassuringly as you bent down to snort it, instantly feeling a rush, your head even beginning to clear. Feeling bold, you licked up the residue as he had before pulling back, unsure of where to go from there. You clenched your legs again, which this time did not go unnoticed by Rafe. Your face was flushed with a mixture of need and embarrassment, captivating Rafe. Staring back at each other with heavy breathing and lust filled eyes, neither one of you, willing to make the next move.
Fed up and impatient with the lack of action, you grabbed him by his neck pulling him to you, pausing just centimeters from your lips meeting. Fuck it, you thought before smashing your lips onto his. You couldn’t think, you didn’t want to, all you wanted was to feel him on your skin. You both mauled at each other desperate to feel each other. Rafe wanted to pull back, he wanted to ask you if it was okay, if you were sure but he didn’t want to risk you changing your mind and saying no. The thought of you rejecting him only made him kiss you deeper, like he was trying to consume you.
“I’ve always loved you,” Rafe’s grip on your throat tightened, a slight smile appearing on your face as he placed kisses up and down your neck, “You’re mine, you’ll always be mine.”
“Yours, always.”
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Midsummer’s had finally arrived, and your entire body was shaking with anticipation at what the night could bring.
“Stop moving! I’m gonna burn you.” Sarah groaned, annoyed with the way you kept fidgeting nervously in your chair, as she attempted to curl your hair.
“I’m sorry. Nerves, I guess.” You apologized to her reflection in the mirror.
“Nerves, right.” Sarah snorted, before placing the curling iron on to the desk. “I’d be nervous too, if I was about to debut half naked with my family at an event frequented by everyone I grew up with.”
“Actually…..”
Sarah stared back at you in the mirror, eyebrows raised in confusion as your sentence trailed off.
“Actually….. what?”
“Well, the only way I can get away with my dress is not arriving with everyone so…. I’ll be arriving a little later.”
“Okay and what am I supposed to tell your mom? And dad?”
“Wardrobe malfunction, I don’t know. Make something up, you were always the better liar!”
Sarah rolled her eyes, “You know Rose would drag you by your hair out of your room before she allowed you to show up late!”
“Whatever, just cover for me, please?” You looked back at her through the mirror, your doe eyes wide pleading with Sarah, knowing that she would give into your request.
Sarah nodded her head defeatedly as you gave her a wicked smile. Your gaze moved to the red dress hanging on your door, your stomach filling with anticipation for the night.
You weren’t entirely sure how Sarah managed to convince your family to leave without you, especially with Ward’s borderline intense need to display the family as a perfect one, but nonetheless she came through.
You pulled into the parking lot of the club, drugs already coursing through your veins as you made your way to the venue.
Normally, your nerves would be shot to hell, especially showing up half naked at an event like this, but all of that went out the door the moment you got high. Walking in alone with your head high, and a haughty look on your face, you quickly garnered attention from everyone in the venue.
You didn’t care about what any of them thought though, as you searched for your family through the sea of people. When you finally spotted them, your mothers jaw dropped in embarrassment as Ward’s face grew tight with anger. Sarah and Wheezie both stood there amused with your antics. You searched for the missing Cameron sibling, anticipating his reaction subconsciously the most.
Rafe’s blue eyes met yours, his jaw tense but his eyes blown with lust as he stood with Topper and Kelce off to the side, Mai Tai’s in hand. You raised an eyebrow at him cockily before making your way to the bar, knowing it would only be a matter of time before he would make his way to you. Like clockwork, you felt his body move behind yours as he leaned down to whisper in your ear.
“It’s taking everything in me to not drag you to the bathroom upstairs, and rip that poor excuse for a dress off your body.” Internally your stomach fluttered, your body littered with goosebumps as you turned to face him, his eyes lingering on your breasts a little too long.
“Bold of you to assume I’d let you.” You scoffed, flipping your hair, as you grabbed your drink, preparing to walk away.
Rafe grabbed at your wrist, pulling you closer to him, and laughed cockily, “You and I both know you would. I mean it wouldn’t be the first time.”
Your face flushed with embarrassment and longing as you remembered the night he was referencing, that night at Midsummer’s where you took each other's virginity, ultimately starting the rabbit hole you both had fallen down together so quickly.
You pulled your wrist out of his grasp, as you saw Ward start to head towards you both.
“Dad’s coming over here, fucking behave for once.” You whispered to him as you both straightened up, putting some distance between you both. Rafe rolled his eyes, downing the rest of his drink scowling at Ward, as he approached you both.
“What the hell are you wearing?” Ward seethed, gripping your wrist, in the same manner as Rafe had only moments ago as he pulled you away from the sea of partygoers. Rafe trailed behind you both, watching Ward unwilling to leave you alone with him.
“Umm.. a dress?”
“Y/N, don’t play dumb. What are you trying to pull here? Are you really that desperate for attention you’d parade around half the town practically naked, looking like a cheap whore? I’d expect this kind of behavior out of Rafe, but not you.”
You looked down out of embarrassment, feeling like a child being chastised, before raising your head high and opening your mouth to speak before Ward cut you off.
“But then again, you’ve been gone for two years. Don’t think I haven’t heard what they’ve been saying about you since you've been back. I don’t even recognize you anymore.”
You held back tears as Ward shook his head in disgust walking away, pushing past Rafe as his expression softened. He knew you were seconds away from crying but were doing your best to hold it in.
“Y/N-“
“Just don’t Rafe. He’s right anyways.” You mumbled as you pushed past him to go upstairs and hide. Tears poured down your face as you took the stairs two out a time, desperate to get away from everyone. Pushing open the first door you saw to hide in, not realizing it was the bathroom. Your heart swelled with grief at the realization only making the tears stream down your face harder as you fell to the floor, your sobs masking the sound of Rafe creeping in and locking the door behind him.
Rafe crouched down next to you, firmly placing his fingers under your chin forcing you to look at him. Sighing as he pulled you into his arms, the fight in you all but gone as you let him hold him.
“You’re not a whore, Y/N, ignore him. I, personally, think you look way hot.” Rafe lightly teased, wanting so desperately to see you smile again the way you used to.
Pulling away to look at him with watery eyes, “It’s not funny. He’s right, you know? I mean look at us, you think this is fucking normal?”
“When did you get so fucking ashamed of me- of us? It never bothered you when I was sneaking into your room every night.”
Your jaw dropped in disbelief as his mood changed almost instantly, lighting a fire in you that you spent two years suppressing and attempting to snuff out.
“Are you fucking serious? Do you honestly not remember or do you just not want to remember?”
You searched in his blue eyes for some kind of clue, maybe he genuinely didn’t remember, you thought to yourself, Rafe had been so coked out and drunk all the time that summer. The majority of the summer for him was a blacked out blur. But there it was. It was gone as quick as it came, but not before you saw the guilt flash in his eyes.
“I fucking knew it! You just don’t want to remember!”
You pulled yourself out of his arms and pushed him away from you as you started to hyperventilate, growing more hysterical by the moment. Rafe stood there unable to say anything, he knew this was his fault, that he had broken you and there was no one to blame but himself. His own eyes watering at the sight of seeing so much of his own untempered emotions and instability in you. He knew he fucked up, and he knew he’d gone to far that night. There was literally nothing more in the world he wanted to take back but he knew he couldn’t.
You never could call it rape, you loved him way too much even if you knew it wasn’t right. When he came into your room that night as per usual, you had told him no multiple times. You were tired and just wanted to sleep but Rafe was so coked out of his mind he wouldn’t listen. Instead he held you down, forcing himself into you, and ignoring your cries. What you hated the most was how your body reacted to him, already used to his touch, your mind screamed no but your body said otherwise. Rafe didn’t stop until you came around him three times that night before drunkenly passing out next to you. Your body was littered in bruises as you cried in your bathroom while he occupied your bed asleep. When Rafe awoke to your empty side of the bed, you were already on a ferry off the island.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry I ignored you when you said no. I’m sorry I hurt you in ways I never thought I could or fuck, even would. There’s nothing I can say to take that back a-and I know that, look, I did a lot of fucked up shit that summer and was really fucked up, but you’re the only one whose ever loved me, Y/N, and I’ve loved you for 10 years. I don’t want to remember because it wasn’t me but it was me even if I was high as fuck and I don’t know how to apologize for what I did. I fucked you up, it’s all my fault, you wouldn’t have left if it wasn’t for me. You wouldn’t be doing coke if it wasn’t for me, I pushed you over the edge and I am so fucking sorry.” Rafe’s own tears began to pour down his face as he manically rambled on, “You don’t have to forgive me, okay, I know I don’t deserve it. Just don’t think a day doesn’t go by where I don’t think of how much I fucked everything up.”
Now it was your turn to stand there unable to speak, but you couldn’t find the words in you. You’d spent two years torturing yourself with whether or not he’d ever take responsibility for it, and honestly you never thought he would. Or maybe you just hoped he didn’t remember, but you did and that was enough to keep you gone. You wanted to yell, to scream at him, to hit him over and over again but you just couldn’t find it in you to be angry anymore.
You both stared at each other unable to speak, until you decided to make the next move. Grabbing his hand to pull him closer to you, you contemplated your next words very carefully.
“I don’t think I can do this anymore.”
“Do what? Us?” Rafe asked quietly, his eyes beginning to water at the thought of you walking away from him forever.
“I can’t keep pretending I don’t love you anymore. It’s eating me up Rafe. Even with everything you put me through and two years apart, I still love you, I never stopped even when I wanted to kill myself because of it, i couldn’t.. because I didn’t want to leave you alone. Even when I thought I hated you, I didn’t. I just hated how much I still loved you.”
“And now?”
“I still fucking love you.” You sighed pulling him closer to you until your bodies were only centimeters apart.
You pulled at his pants, kissing his neck before unbuttoning his tux and making your way down his chest, pausing to hear the sound of his heart beat with excitement. He groaned in pleasure when you moved your hand over his dick, palming him through his pants, eventually slipping your hand into the band of his boxers. You nuzzled his neck, leaving little bites on his neck before kissing each one all while slowly pumping his dick in your hand.
Rafe dreamed about touching you again for years, and as much as he wanted to savor it, there would be time for later. He pulled away leaving you confused, but not for long, as he yanked you off the sink and your dress off your body. You giggled as he placed you back on the counter like it was a gold throne, kneeling down, kissing you all the way up the inside of your leg before biting on the flesh of your thigh. He reached for your panties, his dick jumping at the image of the soaked lace as he peeled them off of your body.
Rafe kissed back up your body all the way to your neck, nibbling on your ear making you moan.
“Are you sure?” He whispered, rubbing his dick up and down your folds, you were soaked which caused him to groan at the sight.
“Yes-yes-yes please oh my god yes.” You cried, angling your hips, grinding up and down on him, desperate to feel him fill you up again.
Rafe smiled cockily to himself, pleased to hear you begging for him, sighing at how sweet you sounded. He dreamt to hear you beg for him again, to relish in your moans and cries but nothing could compare to the real thing. He was hooked. As much as he wanted to just shove his dick into you he knew he couldn’t, you needed to be taken care of first. He dropped down to his knees again as you looked down confused as to why he was on the floor.
“What are yo-” Rafe cut you off by licking a strip up your pussy, before diving in and eating you like a man starved.
“You still taste so good. I’ve dreamed about this for two years, baby, this is all mine.” He moaned into your pussy, the vibrations from his voice adding to the pleasure as you slumped backwards onto the mirror, lacing your fingers into his hair pushing him further into you.
“Yes yours,” You moaned, “Yours, always.”
Rafe pushed a finger into you before adding another causing you to wince at the pain of the stretch. Two years without sex had you on the edge faster than ever before. You could tell you were closer with each stroke from his fingers as he pushed in and out of you faster and faster, your legs clamping around his head holding him place. You moaned into the bathroom walls as you came, the butterflies in your stomach hardly satisfied.
You looked down at Rafe to see him staring at you with a smirk while your chest heaved, desperate to catch a breath. His fingers were still in you as he pulled himself up coming face to face with you. You could see your cum all over his face and your pussy clenched at the sight and again when he kissed you so you could taste yourself.
Nothing needed to be said as you both nuzzled into each other, kissing softly, completely oblivious to the rest of the world.
Rafe lined his dick up before pushing into you groaning at how tight and wet you were for him. You braced yourself for the pain that came with the stretch, courtesy of his large cock, as he eased into you slowly. It hurt at first but the pain eventually turned to pleasure, with each stroke Rafe gave you. His hands dug into your hips, no doubt leaving hand shaped bruises as he pounded into you like his life depended on it. It wasn’t long before the band in your stomach snapped, your eyes rolled back, and your body filled with bliss as you came again, this time around him.
Rafe swallowed your moans as his thrusts became erratic and choppy, signaling to you he was close. Pulling away from his kiss you placed your forehead on his looking down at where you two were connected again, mesmerized at the way he moved in and out of you.
“I-I love you!” You moaned cumming again , causing Rafe to cum almost immediately at your words, his mouth finding yours. He peppered your face and throat with kisses, your eyes closing at the feeling as Rafe’s hands cradled your throat and face. You open your eyes to stare at him, his blue eyes dark with possession mirroring your own. Rafe searched your eyes for uncertainty and hesitation, for anything that could tell him you were lying but he couldn’t. You were his again.
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