#ive started to really dislike mentions of the ship in fics bc like

[qprstobin]

I think some of y'all don't know how to make Mike sympathetic or redeemable or whatever without turning his trauma into internalized homophobia. Like the kid has had SOOO much shit happen to him/in front of him and yet every fic has him basically being a brat bc he can't handle his feelings for Will. He's a traumatized kid he's allowed to be a bit of dick honestly without automatically turning it into a shipping thing

[imaginethathaikyuu]

How did I find your blog? I was looking for soft Kuroo content on google. And your soft birthday hc’s for him came up. And that’s also how I found tumblr

What was the first story of yours that I read? That Kuroo piece ^

Roughly, how long have I been following this blog? Well I found that piece shortly after it was posted so…. Around the beginning of December 2019 I think. Got a tumblr a few months later and you were the first person I followed (had you in my bookmarks bar before that! (still have you in my bookmarks bar and when I share my screen in classes there are occasionally questions. I ignore them))

What’s something I’ve noticed about you personality wise? You’re really clever and funny. But you’re also sweet. But because you’re clever you have no hesitation in setting up and enforcing your boundaries, and I really admire that strength and confidence.

Have we ever interacted, either by PM, ask, or in the comments? What was my perception of you? YES!!! PM, SOOOOO many asks, comments, and you sent me an ask. And reblogged it. And I cried. A lot. My perception: you’re lovely and I want to h*ld your h*nd ….please.

What’s my favorite story of yours? Oh how to choose. Firstly, I’m a nb, biracial, bisexual. Honey, I’ve never made a choice in my life. But let’s try here. Anything you’ve written for Tsukki. Literally all of it is gold. Fight me. I was going to write “especially [piece title]” but I LITERALLY CANNOT CHOOSE ONE. Your Bokuto nightmare piece. Your Kuroo angsty fight. Your Tendou dealing with S/O with parents who yell piece. Your Kinktobers. Your Futakuchi and Mattsun pieces. And your Terushima pieces. Ugh. I CANNOT CHOOSE. OH AND YOUR STREAMER KENMA!!!!!! OKay just… all of it. I can’t choose. I tried, and I failed, and I’m willing to admit failure.

What’s a story I’d love to see you write? I don’t want to say this… because it hurts me… but I just KNOW you’d write brilliant angst. Some of my fav pieces of yours are pained beginnings with happy endings. That fight with Tsukki after a bad day at work. The pieces I mentioned above (nightmare pieces and fighting pieces and angsty home life ha.. ha.ha.ha.). That Oikawa one where the reader wakes up in bed without him and thinks he left. You write these gorgeous atmospheres and descriptive, visceral feelings, and if you chose to use it for evil…. You could get evil shit done. You’re SO powerful. So I want to read it… but also…. I don’t. I’d love to see you write ABO like you mentioned a while back or just see you explore a cutesy soulmate AU or something. I think you’d be really good at writing an AU where you hear what the other person’s listening too. I feel like you’d be so good at making me feel something for someone who was in another city. (think this would be cute with Tsukki cos he’s headphones boy, OR terushima because I like the dynamic of someone flirty, who clearly cares about looks, falling for someone he can’t see) ANYWAY….

Favorite pairing you write for?/fav reader insert? Tsukishima x reader. It’s my fav self-ship. (but also Mattsun, Bokuto, Oikawa, Tanaka, and Akaashi because you write them SO WELL!!!!)

Have any of your stories helped me through a hard time? Of course. Your self-harm piece came at a time I needed it. Iwaizumi’s in particular saved my life. But also your Tendou dealing with S/O parents who fight… came right when I needed it. Also starting college… was hard.. And reading and rereading your fluff really pulled me through it.

Have any of your stories hit closer to home? YES (see above).

Do I genuinely like your blog, it’s aesthetic or posts? It’s overall feel? It’s content? Yes. The aesthetic is, ngl, a wee bit basic. But I kinda love that. And the feel? It feels like home. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Your blog is my safe space. So, yes, I love. It’s content? YES. OF COURSE. Your personality probably could have kept me here even if your content was kinda shit, but I follow you RELIGIOUSLY because of your content. So yes. I adore.

Is English my first language? Kinda??? I grew up in a trilingual household so I kinda learned three languages at the same time while growing up. But no, I don’t need to translate it in my head. Because English was one of the three.

Anything I want to share? Yes. Please keep being kind to yourself, caring for your mental health, enforcing your boundaries, loving Akaashi, and just generally being you. You’re so lovely as you are, and I hope you continue grow, but never change. Also I’m sorry about all your work stuff…. It literally makes me feel sick. And I hope you find a job where that’s not tolerated, or that your work finds a better way of protecting it’s employees. I know you know this, but none of it is your fault. I just hope things improve. AND I love you… a lot. And I’m so proud of you hitting 9K and you deserve so many more followers because your pieces are just... GORGEOUS. I can’t wait until I’m at Barnes and Noble in a few years and I can pick up a hardback copy of your debut novel. I’m so excited to say “I knew Em Akaashi (which is your legal name as far as I’m concerned) before she was so popular among the masses.”

so ive been trying to figure out the correct and worthy way to reply to this ask since the moment i got it......because its so fucking sweet and kind and amazing and pure and perfect and i just dont know how to use WORDS to explain the way it makes me feel so.......i will just reply in bullet points in regards to every question u answered to make it a lil easier :D

- the fact that u found my blog on google ....... like this may be odd and a very specific thing but before i made this blog i always hoped that 1 day my fanfic would pop up in google searches bc thats ALWAYS how i found fics when i was reading them religiously and i felt so much ENVY!!!!! LIKE I WANTED TO BE THERE I WANTED MY FICS TO B POPULAR ENOUGH TO POP UP ON GOOGLE.....that may sound very selfish but its true......so thats just very cool to me... :]

- u’ve been here for so long omg 🥺🥺🥺🥺 if anyone in ur classes ever asks jus promo my blog like its nbd 

- thats so sweet what 🥺🥺🥺 i try my best to advocate for myself and be confident for myself.....ive spent far too much of my time being silently uncomfortable because i was afraid of pushing someone’s buttons seeming rude.....but NO MORE!!!! i know what upsets me, i know my triggers, i know what i dislike experiencing, and im never gonna let myself be anxious or uncomfortable for someone else’s sake, esp if theyre being rude 2 me. i would say its less strength and confidence and moreso me attempting to take control of my anxiety in the places i can (aka on the Internet) bc i am SICK OF ANXIETY ATTACKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

- BBY no dont CRY!!!! im racking my brain trying to think of who u are i wanna know so bad so i can thank u personally for being the kindest person in the world n so i can send u more asks >:(........MY HAND IS URS TO HOLD!!!!! dont tell akaashi tho 

- OMG my TSUKKI pieces.....hes so hard to write why ;-; thank u so much im so glad u enjoy my works<3333

- NOT ANGST NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!! pained beginnings to happy endings are my specialty.....IMAGINE me writing a sad ending like i CANT!!!!!!!!! ive only done it a few times and it is so Difficult.....YALL ARE SO LUCKY IM NOT EVIL!!!!!! ive had this idea for an angsty akaashi fic that i think about and write in my head every night before falling asleep and it Hurts and i wanna write it but i also can’t make myself :D ABO would be very fun but i genuinely do not know how to explore the concept while making it feel like it’s Written By Me.....u know what i mean? same with soulmate aus, i really dislike writing them because theyre just boring to me like they all feel the same everything’s been done for them.....which is FINE!!! but i write enough cliche stuff as it is HAHA, a long distance type soulmate au could be fun and interesting but ldr’s trigger me bc of a past relationship so </3 but hey maybe someone else could use the idea!!!!!

- gotta love tsukishima <3

- im rlly glad my writing could be there for you friend, one of the biggest reasons i write fanfic (and write the kind of fics i write) is bc i know firsthand how much reading sweet stories abt ur comfort characters can help u through the shittiest times - i just wanna offer ppl some support and happy feelings and love cuz sometimes fanfic is the only time we can find those things (and theres nothing shameful abt that either if anyone bullies u for reading fanfic i will fight them)

- I KNOW MY LAYOUT IS LAZY AND BASIC AS FUCK AND THAT IS BECAUSE I DO NOT GIVE A SHIT LMAOOOO so im glad u think its ok...... like i dont have the patience to create a fancy ass layout that actually works are u KIDDING ME??????? I COULD LITERALLY NEVER plus i kinda like that its just the basic kinda ugly boring default layout like it makes it simple and easy and i feel like it brings focus to the only thing on this blog that i care about which is my writing, i rlly only care about the content here and not aesthetics jdbljdabsdk that blue background will be there til i Die......i adore u more btw 

- WHOA trilingual what the hell ur so cool tell me more 

- you have my word, friend, that i will continue to do all of that so long as you do the same. take care of yourself, be kind to yourself - i know u can do it, ur so kind to others and u deserve to be kind to urself, too so this is the part that genuinely brought me to tears because *sappy dumb shit ahead* ok look ever since i can remember the one and only thing ive wanted to do with my life is become an author ...... dreams of book covers with my name written on them and words in pages written by me and fanart of my characters and going into my local bookstore n seeing my book there....these thoughts all haunt my fucking brain because i want it SO BAD!!!!!!!! so bad that it makes me CRY!!!!!!!! ive never wanted something more and just!!!!!!!!!!!! idk how much u meant that part but holy fuck!!!!!! i hope so bad that one day i can send u a free copy of my book as a thank u for being the person u are. u have all my love friend, every last bit of it <333333333

[frumpkinspocketdimension]

fic writing... confession (?) thoughts? who knows. yammering. idk. idk. you’ll see that a lot. idk.

don’t reblog

I feel like my name in TLT fandom is perpetually stapled to the 4gfs neighbours fic. And idk how I feel about that. Because it is probably my least favourite of all the fics I’ve written, and the worst of them too. There’s also a lot of complex emotions I have with the coauthor, and also I straight up just don’t ship 4gfs so much as I ship the two pairings and think one from each probably hooked up once in college or smth and decided to never do it ever again, at best. surprise, i guess. sorry to disappoint. I still think the idea is cute, I’ll still brainstorm little headcanons and whatnot, but I’m ambivalent about them and will probably never write something with the four of them together ever again

Idk.

There’s so many better fics I’ve written for me to be known for, I don’t like the characterisation of that one neighbours fic because it’s essentially four ocs with book names slapped on them, and I don’t particularly want to take my author name off of it because I worked on that shit for straight up four months nonstop but also I feel like my relationship with it right now is just that I dislike it and I dislike that when someone mentions my ao3 handle it’s “oh its the neighbours au author” 

idk

I feel like I’ve moved past it so much I almost don’t want it to exist with my name on it anymore. I don’t really want the ao3 comments from it in my inbox I don’t really want to be associated with it. maybe it’s just sentimentality that keeps me from just taking myself off as the coauthor. its basically the next and last step given ive scrubbed the author notes of my name

idk.

maybe i need to sleep on it. haven’t been vibing with that fic in a long time, and while having old fic up is important to me bc seeing growth and whatnot and i thrive off of external validation i kind of want to be known for more than a fic I ended up literally fighting with the coauthor over every one of those last 10 chapters in and now i dont particularly want to associate myself with. at least with Glass I could blame it on only having read the book once before and getting lost in a writing fugue state without really understanding the characters first that i got the characterisations so wrong. i dont even have that excuse for the neighbours fic. sure it was before i got introspective and found my style but like i dont feel half as bitter about Glass

Idk

the fame? infamy? (it feels like anyone who means anything to me likes my newer stuff better anyways, and rightfully so, so infamy to those who matter to me) has served me well in getting readers after i left the project for the coauthor to keep writing that stuff, but it feels... idk. Idk how to feel about it and what to do about it. I want to be known for Canyons, for poetic lines and introspection and interesting characterisation and for atmospheric scenes not for... a fic that is literally NONE of those things. id rather lose the connection and keep going from what i have than have my name attached to something im not proud of despite it getting passed around fandom. maybe i’d be happier with it off my works page. i know its brought a lot of joy to people and im glad for it but im starting to think its pulling enough joy away from me that its time to cut my losses

IDK

the xbox kinect of my ao3 authorship i guess

tldr; what do you do with a fic that you no longer take pride in and want to burn but people still love and you still benefit from having your name attached to it. I suppose im just complicit in my own misery

[kaedekayano]

001; Kanzaki and Kayano. 002: Gakushuu Asano

oh boy i’m abt to get so excited and emotional fuck adkaldjahdhdjsd

kanzaki/kayano

when I started shipping it if I did: i don’t remember tbh. i always lowkey shipped it haha, but i don’t think i really realised it until @wassailtofivehundred was like !! yukikae !! and also i saw cute fanart and i rewatched a couple episodes (kyoto trip ehh) and i was like, fuck i really ship this. also a lot of it was b/c around december (the time i published be your own hero) i started liking kayano a lot more and then that made me salty bc nagisa/kayano was so poorly written and an injustice to her character. she deserved a person who she had actual chemistry with, and i think kanzaki is definitely that person (or one of them).

my thoughts: pure!! good!! beautiful and amazing!! i love it!! so much!! i’m working on a v v long yukikae kayano-POV fic right now and i’m excited to show it to y’all b/c i have trouble expressing how much/why i love characters/ships until i have a fic to support it, haha. but anyway i think kanzaki is really good for kayano b/c she’s so understanding and caring, and kayano is good for kanzaki because — look they just care so much abt each other okay they’re so Good.

What makes me happy about them: so good. so pure. so beautiful. they’re just healthy for each other and i love the idea of kayano’s best friend supporting her through all the shit she’s gone through because fuck, man, kayano’s mom and sister are dead, the only “friends” she had, she built her friendship on a lie, the teacher she tried to kill and then turned out not to be guilty is dead anyway (bye bye, purpose that kept her going for a year despite all her issues), the person she was for a year was a lie but — not all of it, okay, deep down kaede kayano/akari yukimura is still a good caring person and kanzaki knows it even if she did lie and the two of them supporting each other and I just — yeah

What makes me sad about them: i’m always full of salt about kayano so :/ i don’t like it when people don’t acknowledge the kayano arc happened/kayano’s real personality is very different from the one she pretended to be/she lied to the class for a year? yeah matsui just decided to forget about it and sideline her because he’s a shit writer and what the fuck is continuity, but that doesn’t mean you should follow his example. so it’d be great to see those issues acknowledged!! give me kanzaki understanding kayano did fucked-up things and is a messy person who was not the kind, cheerful, sweet girl she pretended to be and loving her anyway!! (acknowledge and justify the kayano arc for why it happened without throwing logic out the window, and i’ll personally send you a thank-you card)

things done in fanfic that annoys me: there are two fics on ao3 for yukikae, lol (i’m planning to remedy this because inexcusable!!). one is kayano third wheeling karmagisa w/ like 5 lines of actual yukikae (no offense to the author, the fic is fine, it’s just Not Yukikae). the other is green’s fic and admittedly there isn’t a lot of overtly romantic yukikae but it’s a really good fic and there’s good worldbuilding and concepts and y’all should read it

things I look for in fanfic: having it exist. that’s what i’m looking for. that being said, see above rant, because while there aren’t many fics about kanzaki (beautiful daughter pls love her more), there is plenty of fic about kayano and it is almost never accurate. it makes me sad. accurate, well-done characterization is what i Live for

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: both of them, okuda. as previously mentioned, kanzaki, maybe yada? for kaede, rio, also yada, maybe kataoka (it’s mentioned kayano admires her and i don’t think that was a lie, akari seems like the type of girl who recognises and respects strength and competence in people). um. the 3-E girls are all good in general haha, the only person i can think of off the top of my head i’d say no to is okano with kanzaki because okano dislikes her and kanzaki is uncomfortable with that, so. :/ although seeing them work past it (and okano getting past her own insecurities regarding her femininity) would be cool, so even then, i can’t say Absolutely Never. just not nagisa/kayano pls

My happily ever after for them: sometime in their mid/late-20s, they move into an apartment together and own lots of books and cute stationery and various trinkets. also a cat. maybe other pets, like a hamster or a dog. kayano is a successful actress all over again but keeps her relationship with kanzaki not secret but lowkey. kanzaki is away from her parents and likes her job and reads a lot of books. their friends come visit them pretty frequently and the neighbors think they’re adorable. they’re happy.

who is the big spoon/little spoon: omg fuck i suck at this kind of thing. i think kayano would be the big spoon and kanzaki the little spoon but i don’t think they’d mind switching

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: um theyre fond of reading and decorating things (apartment they move into together) and baking and taking walks together. probably taking walks with the dog tbh. that was like 4 i dont know sorry im still in the developing stages of headcanons for these two ive only been highkey invested in this ship for like a month and a half okay

gakushuu asano

How I feel about this character: today i started thinking about him completely out of the blue, with no prompting, and then i sat down and wrote 4 pages in my notebook about an AU where ikeda doesn’t die and gakuhou remains a good dad. last sentence is “in another world, gakushuu asano is healthy and happy and okay.” this is pretty much how i am all day every day i love this child so much he’s just. i see a lot of myself in him (hes relatable okay) and he’s so amazing and brilliant and full of curiosity and potential and i!!! love!!! him!!!! i want him to be happy so much!!! i love him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

All the people I ship romantically with this character: karma (obviously haha), um. fuck. im really fond of renshuu (like really fond) but i usually ship it as ren having a one-sided crush on gakushuu that eventually concludes in ren realising shuu’s crushing unattainability (also i hc gakushuu as ace arospec and he’s kinda ehhh abt romance in general. projecting? me? yeah) and dealing with it and they become really really good best friends even tho it makes ren’s heart hurt a lil bit but mostly its okay. fuck i had a fic abt this i started months ago that i never finished i gotta do that but yeah i envision the virtuosos’ dynamic as being very very complicated in general. oh yeah i cant believe i said i ship karma/gakushuu only once in this post so far so anyway i ship karushuu i love karushuu karushuu is love karushuu is life

My non-romantic OTP for this character: the virtuosos of course its not like i wrote like 1k+ of meta on this hahahaha also gakushuu/isogai, gakushuu/kataoka (why cant we see his respect for her acknowledged as well i know isogai gets his own ep and all but kataoka is still important and is also a class rep :/), gakushuu/nagisa a little bit (i used to be super into it and i still kinda like it), i actually really like the idea of platonic!karushuu because those two are cute boyfriends but working their way from enemies to rivals with grudging respect for each other to best friends?? it’s good

My unpopular opinion about this character: he and karma are not the same person or quite frankly anywhere close to it. there’s lots of parallels they’re good narrative foils but seeing people act like gakushuu is just a recoloured karma makes me sad. pls no my son is so complex and wonderful and different pls pls understand this he’s not just karma akabane with orange hair he’s his own character and such a good one

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: he goes to MIT and is separated from his father’s awful awful toxic influence and lives a happy brilliant successful life and is emotionally okay. i mean it’s not non-canon hahaha but seeing it onscreen would’ve been cool. we can assume that happens anyway tho b/c it’s gakushuu. uhh seeing him interact with his mom onscreen (or like, seeing his mom at all) would’ve been really cool!!! for who i imagine his mom as, i pretty much just think of @cosmicyue‘s hideko asano headcanon :)

my OTP: karushuu obviously. ohh man i love these two nerds so fucking much okay. they hate each other so so much but they also have this respect for each other alright if i start talking about why i ship karushuu (something ive actually never done on this blog bc i dont want people to think im trying to push karushuu on everyone ajdkakdkajsh; theres hardly a shortage of karushuu shippers around) then im gonna b here all day and this is already really long. ill shut up

my cross over ship: none i dont rlly think about AC in relation to other fandoms tbh

a headcanon fact: i have so many. fuck. um one of my favorites (ive mentioned it before but) is that the asanos are both fluent in 3+ languages and they talk shit about people they look down on in those languages when they’re around those people, just to make people uncomfortable.

send me a ship, a character, or five characters