#jaebum x oc

[liannyeong]

Polar opposites

Summary: Even amidst all the anger, he would never break the one he loves.

Word count: 1446

Pairing: Jaebeom X OC

Warning(s): Angst, minor violence

A/N: It's been a long time ~ I was clearing out my drafts when I stumbled upon this. This was written in 2018, and reading it again made me go "Oh? This doesn't seem like a bad writeup?" Heh.

Jaebum thought that their love would overcome all obstacles, just like in romance movies and novels where the couple would fight and then, make up afterwards. He thought they would live happily ever after as long as they are together. That their love could stand the test of time. That their love was such a strong force that anything was possible. But this was reality, not those made-up published fantasies of a romanticist's mind.

They were cosmic stars clashing which perfectly described their first encounter. They collided as she rushed for class while he skipped it. Papers scattered everywhere and profanities escaped his lips. She scrambled for her papers while he for his cigarettes. As soon as he collected his things, his fists were clenched and ready to land a punch on his victim's face, but she had already disappeared into the corridor. And that was the first time someone ever managed to escape the wrath of the famous delinquent, Im Jaebum.

He spent his days searching for the rude girl. In Jaebum's defense, she did not utter a word of apology for bumping into him and almost getting him in trouble. When he finally got her, she had been extremely clueless about him and that bumping incident. She blinked up at him with innocent and clueless eyes that Jaebum could not even argue anymore. Nevertheless, Jaebum found her as a new target, bullied her to no end. However, she never cared about his antics and ignored his existence. She never feared him as all the other students did. But that one time when Jaebum went too far and shoved her down the corridor, she had this flame in her eyes when she met his. For the first time, Jaebum felt scared for his own life. Nothing happened though, but she started to retaliate. She got on his nerves, but funnily enough, she always managed to get away with it. 

Amidst all the animosity, there was a change of heart. It wasn't a gradual evolution of emotion. Rather, it was something that was sparked on a snap. Jaebum had wandered into the field to taunt her. But a baseball was flying towards him unbeknownst to him.

"Look out!" he had heard someone cried out before there was a whoosh sound right in front of him.

As if time stood still, he could see clearly how each strand of her hair fluttered in the wind, how her hand was outstretched right in front of his face, how the ball slammed onto her glove.

It was stupid, Jaebum thought, to feel his heart skip a beat at such incident. But it happened and Jaebum thought she caught his heart along with the ball.

Afterwards, Jaebum became a blushing fool whenever he saw her. He still disturbed her, but no longer as extreme as before. He didn't know how or when he actually mustered courage to confess but the next thing he knew, they were a couple.

Nevertheless, couple or not, they were still two very different individuals. He still preferred streetwear -- leather jackets and dyed hair -- while she preferred smart casual. She was the epitome of a successful woman: smartly dressed, with an aura of confidence. He was violent and aggressive while she was calm and collective. He was fire while she was water. His foul temper always ruined the surroundings but never her. He ruined, she fixed. He was destructive, she was constructive. He explodes, she implodes.

Because of their contrasting personalities, their love was like hot coal. It was scalding to be held, but it spread warmth to the hearts.

Nobody understood why they were together in the first place. Their closest friends always had to deal with them barging into their place with tear-stained faces or fury. None of them understood how they manage to get married and settled down together despite the endless arguments. They were not the happiest couple. They never were. Never had anyone see them smile to each other. No one understood their love.

Except them.

"We'll be fine. We'll always be," her words rang in his ears. He scoffed. Who was she to say that? Indeed, he loved her so much. But she was not him. She could not understand the pain inside. He curled himself up on his bed, letting himself be consumed by sadness and guilt. He screwed up big this time. He had it all, but his pride just had to ruin it. Tears dripped onto the bed sheets that her scent still lingered on.

His endearment for her was too overwhelming. A month had past since the incident occurred and he missed her so bad. Jaebum hoped, every second, that she would show up on the doorstep of the apartment (he no longer called it home) with her bags. But time past by and she did not come. He laughed at the wee hours of every night. He thought to himself. He deserved it. He was a jerk who ruined everything and was a screwed up person himself. He got himself drunk with the little remnants of her in the house, in his mind. He played their memories over and over - her sloppy kisses in the morning and night, her sweet voice that was his favourite song, her soft touches on his skin. Every single little detail of her was etched deeply into his memory and onto his skin.

Every night, he roamed around the streets alone. As he drowned himself in the memories, he always ended up in the neighbourhood of his in-laws. He stood at the pavement, staring at the 9th floor of the building, hoping to catch a glimpse of the woman he loved. He stood for god knows how long, not tearing his eyes away from the windows. But she never looked out of the window.

It became a habit for him to come around everyday. He was too much of a coward to knock on the door. He was too afraid to face her. He knew he was in the wrong, but he never knew why he was not brave enough to face her. He wanted her back so bad, but his body just would not move a step closer to her. She was there: she was within reach, but he just could not take the step. He missed how her silky hair would easily let his fingers card through. He missed how his hands were so much bigger than her face. He missed how perfectly fitted she was in his embrace.

Then he saw her.

He could easily identify her even if she was drowned in the crowd, even in the darkest of the night. She wore the hoodie he recognized so well: her favourite (and his too), a present from him. She stuffed her hands into the pockets of the hoodie and she strolled down the streets, her back facing him. She was all alone, and very easily he could have approached her. But he did not. He followed as she entered the convenience store. She smiled at the cashier as she paid and he died a little inside. He yearned for that blinding smile to be directed at him again. He yearned to see the skin around her eyes to crinkle and her lids to be turned to crescents upclose again. He yearned for her so much. But he could do nothing, only to love her from afar.

The famous Im Jaebum, who never fled from a fight, was in fact, a coward.

So Jaebum came home, all drunken in his own misery and agony. What started as soft sobs escalated into fury. He threw a fit. He smashed the vases, the glass furnitures. He broke all the photos they smiled happily in. He punched holes into the walls. His skin tore and his blood dripped onto the hardwood floor. His head hung low and he rested his palm against the wall for balance, before he leaned his back against the wall. He let himself slid down in agony as he cried. He did not know what was more painful: his torn skin and dripped blood or her absence. Perhaps it was both.

Or perhaps it was the wrath he incurred himself for being destructive.

Everybody knew how bad his temper was. Him throwing a fit would mean the destruction of the world. He would break everything and anything he saw.

Even amidst all the anger, he would never break the one he loves.

The only one who braved the flames of fury was the one he vowed he would never hurt.

But he broke it.

So she left and he knew he deserved it.

[dvbkie099]

four - whiskey-filled stories

Seo Changbin x fem!oc

Tags: Gang!AU, TattooArtist!OC x GangMember!Changbin, smut, violence, drugs, swearing, death, characters are not morally good people

Minji didn’t expect much from sleeping with the hot muscle at her local bar. She left first, after all.

Changbin knows her face. She’s a regular of the bar that Hyunjin runs, loves a strong drink, and has some truly beautiful tattoos.

It should’ve been a one-time thing. That was until Minji inadvertently got herself caught in the middle of a gang war by somehow pissing off the wrong person.

| MASTERLIST

“Penny for your thoughts?”

She turned her head slightly, looking at the man seated next to her.

“You wouldn’t have enough pennies, Chris.”

The man grinned at her, refilling her whiskey glass before snatching the cigarette from her hand and taking a drag from it.

“Bitch.”

It was surprising how quickly they became comfortable with one another, their banter reminiscent of their shared mutual friends. It was natural, she figured, for them to connect so deeply. While everyone, save for Jeongin, had trained under GOT7, none of them had as deep of a friendship with the older guys like Chan. He didn’t know the full scope of her relationship with the men he saw as older brothers, but he knew enough from mentions of her over the years to the fact that she seemed to know why, and even potentially where GOT7 was hiding. She didn’t have to wax poetics, he saw it all in her dark eyes.

“Is the decorating going well?” Chan asked, handing her cigarette back to her.

“Yeah. Thanks for everything, by the way.” 

“Well we did kinda cause your shop to get ruined, so it's the least I can do.” 

“I killed the guy, not you, don’t take my credit.” She snarked, “Also just learn to accept gratitude.”

Chan and the guys were godsends. With her parlour destroyed, she didn’t have the space to tattoo or train her apprentice. In their last consultation, she had mentioned searching for a new place for her parlour. Chan had then offered the empty retail space on the ground floor of the building, next to the club. She hadn’t realized that he owned the entire building, except for the Scarlet Lagoon, which Hyunjin owned. It made sense. It was an excellent base for the group and brought in significant legal money. She had been redecorating the space for the past few days, Hyunjin and Jisung often stopping by and aiding her, to the amazement of Wei, who very obviously had a crush on Hyunjin.

She was a relatively frugal person, tending to only splurge occasionally for special occasions. It came in handy in this case, having the extra funds for new equipment and supplies. They were expected to re-open in their new location in a few days, but there were a few things left.

“Having some trouble figuring out what to put on the walls, given that all the paintings are damaged,” Minji said, taking a long drag of her cigarette.

“What did you do with them?”

“They’re in my office in my apartment.” Minji said, “Can’t get rid of them.”

“Youngjae’s right? The paintings, that is?”

“How’d you know?” Minji said.

“Jisung mentioned seeing the one from Jaebum’s office. Thought you stole it at first.” Chan shrugged.

She snorted, “No, it was a gift to me, before y’know. The rest of the paintings are birthday presents from him as well.”

“Why don’t you frame some of your sketches? You’ve got quite the artistic talent.”

“I mean I could, but my sketches are always just… sketches. The finalized art is what goes on people.”

“The unfinishedness could be the look though. Your shop’s aesthetic was already kinda edgy.”

“The exact aesthetic is dark academia, but I suppose it could work.”

Chan made a face but didn’t retaliate further.

“The question is what to remake onto a standard-size canvas. Given the space, I want seven pieces of artwork up.” 

“Do you have your sketchbook?”

His eyes were on the sketchbook on the counter, yet he still asked that question with a stupid grin on his face.

“No.” 

He chuckled as she flipped the book open, thumbing through pages of sketches. 

“What about this one?”

His finger stopped her from flicking the page, pressing gently across the page that depicted a bouquet.

“The Death Bouquet itself, good choice.” Minji hummed, her manicured nail tracing the pattern of the sketch.

“The Death Bouquet is a real thing?”

“Well, it is an urban legend in my hometown.” She explained. “I drew it and it is the first tattoo I ever got.”

“What’s the legend?”

“Well, it starts with two brothers. It’s said that they were inseparable, even through their teenage and adult years. The younger brother moved away, seeking to find his way, leaving his brother behind. Several years later, he came back to town, with a fianceé. His brother was overjoyed at his return but found himself unable to connect with his brother, too in love with his soon-to-be wife. The older brother found himself resenting their relationship, as it was all his family talked about.”

Her hand stopped tracing, finger staying put on the ribbon of the bouquet.

“It was only until their wedding day, when he was helping his soon-to-be sister get ready, that he realized that he hated their relationship because he loved her. Her bouquet was full of baby’s breath, the flowers of purity and young love, her favourite flower. He was beside himself, torn by his grief and love for the one woman he couldn’t have.”

“When he went outside for a breather, he saw a pretty purple flower going in the gardens. When he came closer to the flowers, he recognized them as Wisteria flowers. When he saw the plants, his bitter heart turned to greed and jealousy, and he plucked a few flowers, making sure to gather a handful of seeds. When he returned to the bride, just before the ceremony was to begin, she wholly accepted the new addition to her bouquet, awed enough to not the seeds he placed in the ceremonial tea that the flower girl was to carry out.”

“However, as he stood by his brother's side, watching as the couples reached for the cups that contained the tea, he could only watch as they drank from the same cup, the bride and his brother ingesting poisonous tea. And when the couple went very still later that night, entangled in their wedding sheets, it was the brother they found, seated at the altar of the wedding church, the bouquet in his hands with tears in his eyes.”

It was silent within the empty Scarlet Lagoon, Minji nursing her whiskey and Chan staring off into existence.

“Is it true? The story?”

“The married couple were found dead, and wisteria toxin was found in their systems. It is assumed that it was the brother, but no one knows. The story is from a few decades before I was born.”

“If people assumed it was the brother, then why didn’t he get arrested for it?”

“He was found dead when the police came to question him. Alcohol poisoning.”

“Jesus Christ.”

“Jesus Christ indeed.” Minji hummed, tipping her glass toward him as if she was toasting him. “That’s the world we live in.”

○○○

"So are you two going to fuck again or are you just going back to staring at her." 

Changbin smacked Minho on the arm, as he pulled his eyes away from Minji across the room. The Scarlet Lagoon was packed, but that was expected. One of the main reasons that the club was as popular as it was, is that it had a themed night once a month. And it wasn't cheesy themes, continuing with the luxe and glamourous interior and general vibe of the club.

It was one of those themed nights, and due to the level of people there, it was customary for all eight of them to attend. And now Minji was attending, no longer a regular of the club and now free to move around. Yet she had stayed at her regular spot at the bar until Hyunjin had weaved through the crowd and pulled her onto the dance floor.

The pair were easily the best looking on the dance floor, the red velvet of Hyunjin's suit pairing nicely with the blush pink satin of Minji's dress. 

As if they could sense people talking about them, the pair wormed their way out of the dance floor, coming over to the table. Hyunjin reached the table before them, Changbin noting the darker tint to his lips and the single red tear-drop-shaped jewel beneath his left eye. 

Minji approached them, the satin hugging her figure down to her hips before it draped loosely down the rest of her body, hiding her legs from view save for her heeled feet. A loose white sheer shawl hung loosely off her arms, upon which matching rose-gold arm cuffs sat. Her fingers had countless rings upon them, all in soft pastels and golds, mimicking her rose-gold jewelled nails. The pastels and rose gold theme continued, up to the cuffs and chains from her ears, which were unnaturally pointed. There were countless small braids littered throughout her hair, with jewels twisted into the braids. Her makeup was simplistic, but the attention still went to her eyes, now a bright purple.

"I see you are strikingly on theme," Chan said, as Minji accepted a drink from him as she sat down next to Jeongin.

"It's a supernatural theme, it's easy to be on theme."

"You wouldn't believe how many people we've had to turn down because they aren't on theme or are dressed like a corny dollar store supernatural," Hyunjin said, scoffing as he stole Seungmin's drink from him.

"You're an ass," Seungmin said, stealing the drink back.

Jeongin tapped her hand as she set her drink down, so she turned to look at the younger man, dressed nicely in a black suit with a scratch across his cheekbone. She noted the dark grey acrylics on his nails, long enough to dig into her hand slightly.

"Yes?"

"How did you do the pointed ears? They look really cool." Jeongin gushed.

"They're prosthetics. Another time I could put a pair on you?"

"I'd like that."

"Stop trying to be cute to woo Minji, Jeong," Minho said.

"Stop being a mood killer and I'll consider." The youngest snapped back.

Minji grinned at their banter, taking another drink. As set her drink down, she noted his eyes on her again. She wasn't blind, she could feel the looks upon her from him but chose not to act upon it. Would it potentially get awkward when she started tattooing the guys tomorrow? Most likely, especially since she was going to be tattooing his pectoral.

But that was tomorrow's problem.

[oofjae]

jina and jaebum bath🥺 nothing sexual just cute and loads of bubbles

thank you so much for requesting :)

jaebum’s left hand smoothed over the skin of jina’s calf whilst his right kept the thin novel he was reading over the water level.

jina sat opposite her boyfriend, a barrier of bubbles between them seemingly, though underneath her legs lay over his own.

she hummed quietly to a song stuck in her head, enjoying the peacefulness and the sense of protection she felt from jaebum’s soft hand drawing figures on her leg.

“okay, i’m ready.”

jaebum moved his book slightly as jina moved closer, water moved along with her, creating small waves.

“oops,” she smiled guiltily when she noticed some bubbles stuck to jaebum’s chin. he only smiled down at her waiting for her to sit with her legs over his lap.

“finished?” she asked, though she already knew the answer. jaebum mumbled a small ‘yes’ in return.

jina used her dry hands to flip the page of his novel. they had soon worked out a system, jaebum was far too engrossed with his books but also far too handsy to keep his free hand dry above water.

plus, this way jina was able to steal a few kisses before shuffling back to her regular space. her arms lay over his broad shoulders, playing with his hair and the cute ponytail he had put up.

“you know,” she said against his lips, “i can read to you, if you’d like?” she stole another kiss.

“mhm, that sounds..” he hummed, distracted by her mouth.

“sounds what?”

“i was going to say sounds good, but i think i’ve had enough of reading for tonight,” he smirked, putting the book down on the floor.

[sunflowerstrays]

my best friend // im jaebum // au

im jaebum x OC (jia). words: 3.4k. genre: fluff, adult themes, angst (a bit of a bish bash bosh au hehe)

summary: jaebum and the boys attend a party with their best friend, Jia, and things get particularly messy between them all. — The lazy glow from the fairy lights hung up outside makes me sleepy as I curl up beside my best friend, Jaebum, at the party. His signature leather jacket is covering my shoulders, protecting the soft skin there from the prying eyes of all his teammates. At my feet, Mark and Jackson chat excitedly to me about their new season starting after summer, and the girls from my cheerleader team giggle with them, trying their hardest to flirt with the boys. But my two other closest friends are either completely oblivious to the attention, don’t want it, or are playing hard to get. 

“You are falling asleep,” Youngjae says with a bright smile, handing me his drink and collapsing across my lap. I stroke his soft black hair, causing his face to glow brighter than the sun. Tipsy Youngjae is the cutest Youngjae, and definitely my favourite. “I’m stealing your girlfriend, Jaebum, and I’m not sorry.”

“Come on Youngjae, how many times will I tell you?” I say, flicking his nose before looking back at Jaebum. He’s been my best friend for so long that I know exactly what he is going to say next. “We would be so cute together, basically a power couple,” I say, mocking his gruff tone and grinning at him. He huffs at me in frustration, and I just blow him a kiss before returning my attention to the young boy in my lap, who looks at us with the biggest eyes. “You are such a meany, Ji. You can’t flirt with a guys feelings like you do,” Youngjae sighs, looking frustrated. “It’s been like, twelve years. Just get with him already.” “Give the beautiful lady a break, Youngjae,” says a new voice, and I see that Jinyoung, the school’s head boy, has strolled out in the garden. Yugyeom follows him out and drops down beside the two flirty girls, who give him a look up and down before giggling with each other again. The look on Mark’s face tells me that he was enjoying the attention, because now he looks disappointed the attention has been spread elsewhere. “Have a seat, Jinyoung. Bambam, move over a little for our head boy,” I giggle with Youngjae, both knowing that Jinyoung hates being called that title. He rolls his eyes at me and purposely hits my back as he walks past with his bottle, making me roll my eyes. “Ji, have you and Jaebum ever kissed before?” Bambam asks, shuffling over for the dark haired boy and leaning too forward in his chair, almost falling out. I wonder how much he’s consumed tonight, and whether it was a safe amount for a single boy. “They did that time we all planned spin the bottle, remember? Or was it true or dare… either way, Jackson made them. We’d never seen Jaebum so happy,” Mark chuckles, picking up an empty bottle by Jackson’s foot. “How about a rematch?” “Sure,” my friends all nod, and rearrange themselves accordingly. I roll my eyes, looking at the outnumbering of three girls to seven boys, but decide to let the drunk boys get on with it. Youngjae shuffles off of my lap to sit beside me instead, grinning as bright as the sun beams. The bottle lands on Yugyeom, who is told to pass his drink to the prettiest girl here. The giggling boy swings his bottle between me and Somin, the blonde girl from my cheer squad, before finally giving in and handing it to me. I blush and drink the cups contents, the drink a fruity punch with a strong taste of alcohol underneath. I thank the tall boy before dropping the cup at my feet, Jaebum snorting with distaste as I shrug off his jacket and lay it over my legs instead. The next few rounds are just stupid dares that leave Jackson shirtless, Yugyeom sat on Mark’s lap and Bambam kissing Jinyoung. None of the boys seem to care about the attention they are drawing when they start howling loudly, and a group of girls come outside to join, sliding between some of the boys after seeing a shirtless Jackson, I’m sure. I’m content with the game because the bottle doesn’t seem to be stopping on me, and that makes me relaxed. But just as I shake my long pale blonde curls off of my shoulder, the bottle ends up pointing at my knees. “Really?” I sigh, glaring at Jackson who is beaming from ear to ear. “Dare,” I huff, being known for never backing down from a dare. It’s ended me in some dodgy situations before, but I’ve always gone through with them. “Oh come on, we all know what he’s going to ask,” Jaebum rolls his eyes at his friend. “Lets really ramp it up, shake up Mr Jaebum’s world. Ji, I want you to kiss the most attractive boy here. And he can’t be your best friend.” The shock on everyone’s faces makes me laugh as I look around the circle, adjusting my skirt and rolling my shoulders. All six boys look at me with wide eyes, and I can see which ones of them will probably forget this in the morning: all of them. Jaebum and I were the designated parents of tonight’s party, and the boys have definitely taken advantage of that. With one glance at the frustrated Jaebum beside me, I jump up from my seat between the boys, the taller boys jacket falling off of my knees as I step around Youngjae and chew my lip for a second. “Come on, Ji, you are killing me,” Yugyeom whines, making me smile. I walk around the circle once before kneeling down in front of Mark, who comes to life as I lean forward. I don’t even have to kiss him as he moves and meets me in the middle before I can. “Give it more fire, Ji. We all know you are capable of it,” Jackson says with a tight yet amused voice beside me. I laugh lightly before running my fingers through Mark’s hair, making the older boy sigh and hold me gently. “Someone get a photo of JB. Mark, I wouldn’t sleep tonight at his if I were you,” Bambam howls, and I move away from Mark to look at the dark haired boy. Jaebum has recovered now, and sits with a smug look on his face, but I see annoyance at his friends in his eyes. One last glance at Mark and I see that the older boy is elated, his cheeks glowing and eyes light. I’ve never seen him so relaxed. As I take my seat beside Jaebum again and take his larger hand in mine, I feel a pang of guilt. Whilst intoxicated, these games are fun and joking, but I know Jaebum hasn’t drunk at all and the feelings for me that he has have been around for a long time. Sure, he’s been with his fair share of girls from the year, and has never held back in these games just like I don’t, but I know how well he tries to hide it. “Mark, you’ve got Ji’s lipstick on you. It’s a pretty colour,” Youngjae giggles, clapping loudly when the bottle lands on him. More rounds occur and I somehow manage to survive a dare that has me taking three shots then repeating the same dare as earlier, where I share another more drunken kiss with Mark. My next turn is a truth, and whilst it’s Bambam who spun the bottle and gets to choose for me, I’m shocked by his question. “Why, knowing how JB feels for you Ji, have you never explicitly said no to him? Do you have feelings for him as well?” I look at Jaebum for a moment, because he is my rock to keep me sane in moments like this. I’ve never thought about why I’ve never said no to him, but I do know the answer to his second question. “Thats two truths. Pick one,” I say, sounding hesitant and more nervous than I’d like. The only one that picks up on this is Jaebum in a sober state, who wears a cloudy expression. “Fine. Do you have feelings for him?” Yes. Of course I do. He’s been my best friend for so long, and I’ve had feelings for him just as long as he has me. But he knows too much about me as a person for me to risk ever losing him, especially in such a horrible way like heartbreak. I’ve experienced it enough, and Jae has been there to get me through each one. The thought of him not being there for me through another because he is the reason makes me sick. “Haven’t I made it clear before?” I say, internally cringing when I see Jaebum physically flinch out of the corner of my eye. “That’s not clear at all. Give me an answer!” Bambam sounds as frustrated as I feel. I glare him down, and he shakes his head, realising he’s beginning to upset me. “But I guess you have. Your turn to spin, Ji.” I twist the bottle and yawn loudly, leaning more against Jae as I begin to feel drained again. It lands on Jaebum of course, and I tiredly pass the question on to Youngjae, wanting to be curled up at home suddenly, drowning in the feelings I try so hard to repress. “Truth or dare, Jae?” Youngjae says in a voice that mocks me. “I dare you to try that voice and name one more time, Youngjae,” Jaebum says challengingly, and the younger boy apologises profusely. “Dare.” “I dare you to kiss Ji,” Bambam blurts out suddenly, and Jaebum raises an eyebrow in response. Youngjae nods, and everyone leans forwards to watch. Jaebum glances down at me, his eyebrows raised in amusement. I shock him by moving closer and kiss his cheek quickly, making all the boys howl in laughter. The kiss is so brief and short that he doesn’t have time to react, just numbly touches his cheek as he looks at Bam. “Now that I didn’t expect,” Jinyoung chuckles, crossing his arms and nodding. I slip my arms into the sleeves of Jaebum’s jacket again, feeling cold as the party begins to die inside. I’ve noticed how empty looking the house has become. Jaebum still looks away with the fairies as he spins the bottle, and it subsequently lands on me after spinning for a while. I roll my eyes and look up at Jaebum, who snaps out of whatever trance he’s been in and looks at me again. “Truth,” I say, not wanting to have to do any of the silly dares that the boys have been coming up with all night, even if the majority of them have been funny. “Okay, so relating to Jackson’s earlier dare, do you find Mark the most attractive?” Jaebum asks, laughing when he sees me scrunching up my nose. “Well, I find you all equally attractive in your own way. I figured Mark would be the best kisser though,” I say, sticking my tongue out at a rowdy Jackson who starts raising his voice, saying he can definitely change that opinion. “Oh pipe down, you should have been more specific with your questioning!” Before Jackson can run across the circle and knock me out, the person who’s garden we are all crashed in comes out and tells us that the party is over. We all look at Jae, who nods before the question is even asked. I’d be spending the night at his house anyway - his house is easily the biggest on the island, and I have my own room over there. His parents, who are rarely home because of their work commitments, love having me round, and I would much rather live at my best friend’s house rather than mine. As a result, half my wardrobe is at Jaebum’s, as well as all my school work and most of my belongings. Another reason why dating Jaebum would be catastrophic for the both of us. We all thank the boy and start the trek up the ridiculous hill to Jaebum’s, me having jumped on Jackson’s back because of my aching feet that I place off well. The boy is still mad with me from earlier, but I hug his neck and shoulders and apologise in my sweetest voice until he forgives me just to shut me up. When the boys finally make the long trek up Jaebum’s drive, Bam nearly collapses at the gates from tiredness and Mark and Yugyeom have to drunkenly carry the boy through the house to the large spare room where they’ll all be staying. I’m convinced they are all going to pass out in their clothes until Jaebum drops a fresh pile of joggers on the ground and tells them to freshen up in the bathroom, grumbling about his parents being back tomorrow afternoon and him not wanting to have to spend all tomorrow cleaning. I follow him upstairs to our rooms, which is a phrase I’ve thought over so many times now it isn’t unfamiliar to me anymore. Jaebum leans against my doorway as I chuck my heels into the corner and shrug off his jacket it, carefully hanging it on the coat peg. “Jia,” Jaebum says as I pull an old pair of his oversized joggers on my legs. I look up from where my foot has gotten tangled and raise an eyebrow at him. “What happened tonight with Mark-” “Don’t stress,” I stop him before he can continue. “Please. It was a dare. I had no choice. Besides, the results would have been vastly different if you wasn’t out of the mix.” Usually comments like this cheer him up, but tonight something has him extremely caught up in the moment. I finish with the joggers and tell him to shut his eyes whilst I change from my dress to an old shirt of his - the only thing of mine that isn’t at his house is any feminine pyjamas that I own. They are all at mine, so now I just sleep in whatever Jae has lying around that still smells of him. When I’m finished, I walk over and hug him tightly. I wrap my arms around his waist and pull him closer, resting my head on his chest. He keeps his arms by his side, hesitant to move at the minute. “There are so many reasons why I can’t do this,” I say, and I feel him suck in a sharp breath. “So many that no one would understand if I tried to explain. I can’t risk it though.” “But Jia, you are the biggest risk taker I know. You never hesitate with anything. Why me?” He sounds broken, and knowing I did that is enough for me to want to jump the White Cliffs. “I can’t risk losing you,” I say, scrunching up my eyes and sighing against his chest. He reaches up and brushes my long hair, gently teasing out the curls and remaining quiet. “But what if I promised you wouldn’t lose me?” “No one ever keeps their promises,” I snort ungracefully, stepping back and letting go. “Never. I can’t rely on that.” “Where are you going?” he asks as I turn around and pick up my duvet and cushions. Confusion is on his face as I wait by him in the doorway. “We have guests. I’m not ignoring the chance for a sleepover!” I chirp, and all the worry and confusion on Jae’s face melts away into adoration for me. He dashes into his room to change whilst I bundle down the corridor, dragging my sheets behind me. At the top of their stairs I can hear a bickering argument between Jackson and Mark, and roll my eyes, knowing precisely what it is about. “Boys,” Jaebum mutters, his eyes light again. I nod with a laugh and leap down the stairs, running across his kitchen and sliding on the long trousers into the room where the boys are all passing out on the sofas. Bam has woken up again and rests his head on Yugyeom’s shoulder, who stretches out across three chairs whilst Youngjae snoozes on the floor. As I slide into the room, I trip on the duvet and end up barrelling into Jackson, who shouts and gives me an evil glare. I stick my tongue out and lay across him, my blanket covering him as I squash the muscular boy. “Ji you are so annoying! Like a baby,” Jackson huffs, rolling over and tossing me to the floor before sitting on my stomach. My eyes go wide as he begins to tickle my sides, and I thrash about to stop him, unable to catch my breath because he’s tickling me so much. Mark joins in, pinning my legs and chuckling as he tickles my bare feet like a mad man. “Help!” I cry, tears in my eyes from the excessive amount of tickling. Jaebum considers it, before sitting beside my head and just tickling under my chin. “I hate you all. I will sue you for this Jackson - We aren’t friends anymore!” The three boys stop immediately, apologising profusely for tickling me to the point of tears. I just sniff and wrap my duvet around me, laying on a sleepy Youngjae who wraps an arm over me and declares that he will protect me until the end of my days. Then Yugyeom and Bambam join us, sitting in front of the me so the boys can’t reach me. I poke my head out from my duvet and rest it on Youngjae’s chest, giving the three boys stares as Jinyoung comes out of the bathroom looking wildly confused. He shakes his head and sits in the now empty seat, head falling back in tiredness. “Jia is smart. She brought a blanket,” Youngjae says, still cuddling me as he tugs some of the duvet over him instead. I curl up and let him, and together we fit under the double duvet, with Yugyeom also crashing on the sofa with us and Bam dragging the floor mattress to the end and chucking a loose blanket over himself. The other boys who are still partially drunk just argue bitterly over who has the blankets and who doesn’t, so Jaebum eventually drops his blanket on the floor and runs his eyes, looking done with his friends. My heart swells at the action, and when Yugyeom jumps up to change before crashing alongside Bam on the floor, I pat the chair and welcome him over. As he sits down I give him the blanket as well and pull him towards Youngjae and I, until the three of us practically cuddle on the sofa and the other boys are laughing at the situation. “This hurts, Jia,” Youngjae whines, and I finally huff and sit up between the two boys, sticking my bottom lip out and sulking. Youngjae begins to apologise, but Jaebum tells him that I’m just being a nuisance and always get like this if not cuddled to sleep. Then he wraps his arms around me and half pulls me on to his lap, letting me rest my head on his chest and shut my eyes, feeling his breaths with each rise of his chest. Youngjae smiles sweetly at Jaebum, a smile that I catch when I crack my eyes open slightly. It makes me roll my eyes, but fills me with both joy and sadness anyway. One day, I can dream. Until then, I just gave to keep up what I’m doing, even if it’s destroying both of us. — hey lovelies. jaebum fluff because im soft for jaebum - fun fact about me! i’m going to write a part two because,,,, im so soft for him. not sure if i mentioned that already. don’t hate me. requests are still open <3

[jj-ktae]

Fragrance IX : Wisteria

Title : Fragrances

Genre : Fluff, Angst, Romance

Pairing : Jaebum x Reader

Summary : You are a perfume composer, he is a lyricist, and while you’re left with too many possibilities, he is out of inspiration. Your only bond is an unknown fragrance. Second part of the Fragrances series.

- Teaser - Wisteria - Metallic - Sillage - Accord - Final -

Fragrance IX : Wisteria 

The Wisteria flower’s message is let good luck make your adventures go a little smoother. Celebrate the new beginnings in life instead of focusing on the endings. Gardeners love its delicate perfume in the spring, but the rest of year, this vigorous vine seems to have a mind of its own. Wisteria loves to climb and wander. 

“Y/N, Come here for a minute.” The voice makes you stop munching on your food to turn around, you dress floating around you in a delicate manner. You walk toward the voice, mouth full and jaw busy, nodding at your boss.

She is still as glamorous as ever with her tight tube dress, accentuating her curves and giving her a silhouette you had seen too many times already. “Meet Y/N, our new perfumer. She is the one who created Universal. We were able to get an exclusive contract and she is now officially our genius creator. Y/N, these men would like to write an article on your career and personal story.” Her voice is a tone lower than usual, which you take it as a way to seduce you into agreeing.

She knows you too much to actually think you could agree to do that.

“There isn’t much to say about me.” You play the innocent card, hoping this would let you slip out of an awkward moment.

“Don’t believe her, she is amazing. ” A hand goes to your shoulder and your shoulders go down in embarrassment.

The lady agrees, the hint of a smile blooming on her magenta lips. “You already know Jackson Wang, fashion designer and owner of Ateliers Wang.” The men nod, hoping to get another juicy interview with another famous person.

“Nice to meet you, can I borrow this lady for a second?” In spite of his subtle way to take you out of this, they make agree before fleeing, before swiftly pinching Jackson’s arm who giggles at your irritated state.

“I was about to reject this offer, Jackson.” You get more food as soon as you’re close enough to actually grab something, but Jackson takes the petit-four out of your hand, eating it.

“Which is why I made you do it. There’s nothing wrong with a bit of bragging for the journalists. It’s good that you can do it, you asocial mole.” He jokes and grabs two glasses of champagne, handing you one “Now enjoy.” He orders and you roll your eyes, sighing.

“Boss!” You hear again but before you can localize the origin of the voice, a head appears, with long earrings and deep blue lenses.

Bambam is so elegant in his long suit decorated with golden studs and suede boots. “Elle’s editor in chief would like to write an article on how to pick a perfume and I would like to see you!”

You open your mouth and close it, in awe. “Wow, you’re really out there dragging me into shitty business.” It’s unbelievable, why are they always acting like your managers?

“It’s not shitty, it’s called being in demand. It’s quite flattering, right Jackson?” Bambam points a finger at Jackson who can only nod, a piece of artichoke hanging between his lips.

“Get their number, I’ll call them when I have time.” You conclude, not in the mood to deal with Bambam’s possible nagging if you refuse.

He winks at you and turns around, already fleeing toward another league of person in suits and shiny dress and you want to drink yourself into oblivion. It’s not that you don’t like the place, you just feel uncomfortable whenever people come after you, afraid to disappoint.

Ever since Universal’s release, things took a huge turn.

The perfume was a huge hit. People started to ask who did it and eventually, you were requested in many parties and fashion events. You were glad Bambam knew enough to actually help you dealing with the sudden popularity in the fashion world but you were slowly regretting it by now.

“Stop freaking out, you’ll be great. You’re always great.” Jackson can read your mind like it’s a newspaper, so you only smile at his unflattering support.

“Get me more food.” You say to hide your grin and he instantly feeds you the rest of his roasted vegetable, before someone taps on his shoulder to greet him.

Jackson is always one to compliment you whenever you doubt about yourself. It’s been a year since you met him, and not even once did his behaviour change. It felt good to count on someone who was always doing his best to cheer you up, even when you were feeling so down you would barely go out of your apartment.

You look at Jackson, who is now chattering in fast Chinese with another shiny man and forget about your environment; looking around the numerous people, dreamy. It’s crowded but the soft music covers the noises and it helps in giving you relief in the middle of the stress.

Ever since Jaebum left, you didn’t talk about him to anyone except Jackson. It was as if he never existed for everyone, but it was so hard to deal with his absence. It used to be hard actually, because you don’t feel so stressed anymore.

Now that you have Jackson who is strong enough for an army, things tend to be too easy for you.

It doesn’t help that Universal reminds you of Jaebum every time you smell it; and a lot of people bought it, because you smell it every single day. You learnt to live with it, it became a part of yourself, a friendly reminder that there is a missing part inside of you. You can still smell him inside your flat, even though he left almost a year ago.

And when you turn around with another glass of champagne you freeze right before bringing it to your lips.

The first person you notice in the middle of the crowd is Jaebum.

He looks slightly different, but so similar to what you remember of him. His burgundy suit makes him stand out on the most beautiful way, almost too good for you to land your eyes on him.

He is staring back at you, totally forgetting about Youngjae who is talking to him and pointing numerous places. You stare at each other for some good never-ending two minutes before he takes a step toward you.

You take a step back at the same time, your hand going to Jackson’s arm to get his attention. He doesn’t turn around right away and when Jaebum takes another step toward you, you pull on his sleeve.

“What’s wrong?” He says and you shake your head, tearing your eyes off Jaebum to silently plead for his help. It’s scary, frightening, unpleasant and a lot more emotions. You don’t want to be near him. It hurts you the way his smell goes back to you and damages your brain again.

You can’t let it get to you, you have to find your way out if you know what is good for you.

But Jackson doesn’t understand and puts an arm around your waist when he feels your uneasiness. “Wanna get out of here?” He totally forgets about his friend, his tender eyes laid upon you in a sweet manner. It makes you go back on earth right away. Your breathing calms, you heart slows, your muscles relax.

And Jaebum stops moving right at this moment.

“Are you even listening to me- oh.” Jaebum peaks at Youngjae who reached his level when he saw him walk away. “They’re dating. Bambam told me but I wasn’t sure you were interested.” Youngjae feels uneasy, but he doesn’t know if it’s because Jackson is making you dance slowly, or if it’s because of the look on Jaebum’s face.

Jaebum only hums before turning around quickly, his hair floating and he plunges into the crowd, shaking hands and smiling when needed.

What was he expecting anyway.

“What happened?” Jackson looks around at some point, but Jaebum is gone and you let out a shaky breath. “Shall we go?”

You smile at him and shake your head when you notice his worried eyes. “Nevermind. I’m good. Thank you.” Your tone is a lot softer now, and even Jackson is surprised but approaches your body from his nonetheless. 

“As you want.” The music makes you both move again and you laugh when Jackson makes you twirl around dramatically, forgetting about whatever negative thought were going through your head.

You let everything go, serenity and peacefulness taking over you. It’s amazing how Jackson can make you dismiss every negative thought, even for only a second.

“The journalists are waiting.” Your boss’ voice makes you stop dead in your tracks, hands clutched around Jackson’s fingers and smile upon your face.

“We’re dancing, they can wait.” Jackson talks back to her like she is a nuisance and you hide your grin when you hear your boss sigh in annoyance.

“I’m coming.” You answer and he starts pouting like a small child. It’s only when you see Bambam and Youngjae approach that you decide it’s time to fly away from the soon to be embarrassing conversation.

You let go of Jackson’s hand and follow your boss before she can curse at you all.

Jaebum disappeared and you don’t wish for him to be here. No at all.

It’s not like you hate him. Well technically, you do a little. How else should you feel when you were left with nothing but a smell and a love bite the morning after he finally confessed what seems to be now lies? 

He doesn’t know how worried you were. He doesn’t even imagine how you felt when you heard about this kid found in the river after throwing himself off a bridge. He will never guess how much you tried to figure where he was. It doesn’t matter anymore though, Jaebum belongs to a past where you were gloomy and sad and lonely.

What’s a fragrance? What’s a scent? It’s a mere built-up feeling made by your brain to lure you into fantasy. There is nothing extraordinary about Jaebum, and with time and the help of Jackson, you made it. You’re out of his spell. You can manage just fine. 

This is what you try to force into your brain, everyday.

You and Jackson are doing great. He is the most gentle and caring person you ever met. He stimulates you with a mere breath, giving you ideas and helping out when you’re about to burst in frustration. 

Jackson is that calm water you expect to find on a warm summer day. The type of sea with soft waves and no turbulence, the guy who is soothing without even trying. It didn’t strike you as an evidence, it just happened on a particularly stressful evening. Jackson came to bring some samples because Bambam was away for the week and found you broken in the living-room, intoxicated by the lingering scent and hyperventilating.

It felt right when he held you and hushed your cries silently. Jackson never probes you to say anything you don’t want to say, but he knew it had to do with Jaebum. He never mentioned it though, too scared to add to your misery. He simply stood there, your head into his shoulder and arms tapping your back. It’s just then that you found comfort in his sugary, vanilla scent.

Jackson is comfort. Jackson is warm.

You smile at the thought and finally look at the journalists who are waiting for you to tell them when you’d be free for an interview. You focus on them, even when this particular scent comes back, making your nose twitch. You don’t move, eyes glued to them and you almost want to do the interview right now but they have to go and leave you there after numerous praises and smiles.

Even your boss follows, sticking the two journalists and asking about remuneration and prices. It feels cold suddenly, like there’s no one to hold on to, and Jaebum is out there, most likely close if you trust your nose.

You feel like a shark’s prey.

But you can’t let it win. This feeling is nothing but smoke and mirrors, the illusion of what could have been something great, scattered by the person who was supposed to make it awesome.

You snort when you find your rage back, turning around violently to join the group you left earlier and in spite of all your good intentions, you collide into the last person you wanted to be close to. You take a step back when you find your balance again and look around, not knowing if you should be happy or not that so many people surround you two.

No one can save you now.

“Hi.” Jaebum’s first word is a mere greeting, the one you keep for people who don’t matter, the one that mean nothing but politeness. It’s a ‘hi’ you want to thrust back into his relaxed mouth like it never happened because it makes your mind go berserk. 

“Hi.” You reciprocate the greeting, deliberately avoiding his eyes and aiming for anywhere your legs can take you. You thought you were ready but you’re not. You’re definitely not. Jaebum is right here looking flawless and something in the way he stands is off, it’s like he is a different person, someone with confidence and refinement.

You walk away but his voice, even deeper than before, makes you stop. “How have you been?” he stares at you with a tiny spark, and you don’t know what it means.

“How...have I been?” and you snort, shoulders slumping down in bewilderment. Is he for real? “Fine, just fine.” You need to walk away because he is toxic, Jaebum’s whole existence is meant to put you into misery and you start looking for Jackson in the middle of all the fanciness. 

“Good. I missed you.” Jaebum lets you look around, aware that the situation might be too much for you to handle but he can’t help it. It took everything he had not to run away, he could feel his blood pumping litters into his body, from his toes to his brain and his palms were getting too sweaty for his liking but he couldn’t back off.

Not after all the progress he made.

“You what?” You stop looking around to search for his eyes and find nothing but determination. Jaebum means everything he said. “Look, I have to go, I’d like for you to stay away from me.” It’s hard to push him away but it’s your reason speaking, not your heart. 

“I can’t.” Jaebum takes a step forward, and you take a step back, bumping into an old man and apologizing quickly. You can’t let him enter, not right now, not when everything is going smoothly. Jaebum needs to go as soon as possible.

“Why is that?” You whisper with a shaky voice. You’re frightened by his answer, your stomach contracting painfully under his steady stature.

“I won’t run away. Not anymore.” He looks determined, like you have to be part of him again and you find yourself shaking your head, eyes closed. 

No way in hell he will claim you as he likes.

“I’m dating Jackson.” You say in a hurry, eyes scrutinizing Jaebum’s face for any sort of reaction.

But it seems he likes the challenge, because he raises his eyebrows in annoyance. “I know.” 

“So you better leave me alone.” You try with too little resolve, eyelids moving on their own.

“I will explain everything. Then, you will understand.” He says next and surprisingly disappears between bodies, leaving you trembling and amazed by the power of his natural smell which he didn’t try to cover with cologne.

You follow his path and see him wave at Youngjae who is talking with a man. 

“Y/N? You done?” Jackson and Bambam are quick to join you and you nod, chest heavy with uncomfortable feelings and eyes moist with despair.

It all felt too disturbing for your liking. 

---

Jackson notices the way your turn silent in the car. He doesn’t ask but he knows. He saw Jaebum, he heard people talk about how the amazing Defsoul came back with yet another wonderful song. Jackson is outspoken and open-minded but doesn’t know how to react when it comes to you. He can only be soft and caring, with hints of gentleness and smooches to make you feel better. He peeks at you from his spot on the driver’s seat and finds you staring outside, eyeballs following lights and lips parted in desperation.

And for once ever since you started going out, Jackson speaks about the forbidden topic, voice low and tone solemn. “I saw Im Jaebum at the party.” He starts softly because he needs you to open up by yourself. No matter how scared he is by the outcome of his probable reappearance in your lives, he needs to be sure your relationship is safe.

He doesn’t want you to leave and make him feel used. Jackson wants you to find happiness no matter what, even if it means not going back to his arms when you feel bad. He is aware of that, he asked you out knowing Jaebum could come back anytime. 

You didn’t promise anything to each other. You never told him you loved him, he never told you he loved you. You don’t live together, you don’t text each other every day. You have male friends and he has female friends, you’re not a fusional couple and it’s good that way for both of you. Jackson just needs to be sure he can go deeper into this without being hurt.

“I saw him too. Why are you asking?” you don’t look at him because his eyes express too many things for you to hold his stare most of the time. You know now is no exception. You know Jackson doesn’t like the situation, and you don’t plan on letting him feel uncomfortable.

“It’s disturbing you.” Jackson adds, stopping by a red light. 

You finally look at him. “It’s not.” You feel the need to justify yourself even now, and you know you’re revealing yourself with just this reaction.

“I’m not mad or reproaching you anything. I just want to understand. That’s all.” You swear Jackson is too good for this world.

“It’s complicated. I could not care less about him and I’m not planning on being friends with him.” It’s true. You’re not lying.

“Do you hate him?” The light turns green and Jackson starts the engine, but the answer is stuck into your throat. You chose to stay silent because your answer is not the one you want to give to Jackson, yet you can’t lie either.

I don’t.

Jackson gives your forehead a warm kiss before leaving. Your apartment is the same old place, with more perfume supplies and less tidying. You close the door and throw the keys on the first furniture it can land on. 

You put so much incense that the smell stuck to every curtain, but it’s better than what it was. It’s too strong to make you dwell on broken promises. 

“Look, it’s just fine this way, don’t criticize my talent, boss!” Bambam paces around the room with numerous samples, nose smelling everything at the same time while you question the percent of musk he put in one of his fragrance.

“I’m just saying this will only attract animals in heat. It’s so strong!” You laugh a little when Bambam’s shocked face appears between bottles.

“That’s the whole point. A fierce fragrance for fierce people.” Bambam puts the bottles and his arms finds his hips, a look of pride painting his stylish being.

“What about this,” you open up another sample and put it under his nose. He shakes his head.

“No, no no no. You’re not going to go full genius on me and you’ll let me handle this alone. Please?” he begs because he feels ashamed for not thinking about it earlier. He wants to do this alone. It’s his very first project and this will determine his future as a perfumer. You won’t always be around.

“As you wish. I’m just trying to help.” You lift your hands in surrender and get up, “I’ll make some coffee.” You decide not to push him because he already has enough pressure with this. Bambam was asked to make his own fragrance as an official perfumer and ever since he started, he reminds you of him when you created universal. He can’t stop whining and complaining about how useless he is.

“By the way.” You turn around from your spot near the coffee machine and find Bambam, hand under his chin. “Did you know that Defsoul was back?” he never talked about him until now. It’s funny how everyone asks you like you don’t already know.

“I know.” You say simply, feigning detachment. 

“Youngjae is about to release a whole album composed mostly by him. Nothing is confirmed yet, but Youngjae told me they might both sing in one song. I didn’t know he could sing, did you?” Bambam starts going crazy in the kitchen and you shrug.

You didn’t know, indeed.

“Anyways, Youngjae asked me to invite some friends over because he is celebrating his return. I thought I’d ask but I didn’t know if you...” He stops, sensing you might not agree on going.

He isn’t that stupid.

“...If I wanted to come knowing Jaebum would be there?” you finish and it startles him, how blunt you are suddenly. You always avoided every conversation concerning him.

He nods slowly, leaning on the counter.

“You’re right. Thank Youngjae for me, but I won’t go.” It’s safer to avoid any sort of contact. The less the better.

“Figured. Anyways, I’ll just go back to work.” It’s rare to see Bambam this serious as he walks away.

Jaebum would sing ? It’s not surprising after all, he can create music perfectly so why not sing.

The doorbell takes you out of your thought and you run for the door, hoping Jackson would be behind it. 

“Y/N?” A very young man stand before you, with a huge bouquet. 

“...yes?” You look at the flowers then the boy who wears the cheekiest smile. 

“It’s for you. A flower delivery.” He hands you the bouquet and leaves before you can speak, leaving you with the huge bouquet and a tiny card attached to it. You recognize the flower immediately. You used it for a perfume back when you started working and it was so subtle you had to add a lot to make it stand out.

Wisteria

Bambam is still busy when you close the door and you go to the living room to put it on the table. There is no name on the card.

They remind me of you. 

You know it’s not from Jackson. Jackson is blunt, he would buy a whole tree and plant it in the middle of your room while singing dramatically. Only one person can be this subtle. So subtle you don’t even understand what it means.

You realise you never understood what Jaebum meant most of the time anyways.

---

[baby-mylove-beautiful]

You Are

Pairing: Jaebum x OC Genre: fluff/kind of sad?

Synopsis: He doesn’t know her but he feels as if she’s meant for him. 

Word Count: 2,030

There she was sitting at a little cafe, enjoying her bubble tea and a book. She was in her own world, unaware that she was being watched. There he was Jaebum, a man known for his handsome features and chic image, enchanted by her appearance. Their paths crossed for the first time and he isn’t convinced this was by chance. He doesn’t know her, but he feels like he does.  “Hyung, why are you staring like that? You’re going to get caught,” Jackson said as he nudged his friend. “Quiet Jackson, before you get caught,” he blurred out to his friend still staring at her. “But you don’t even know her. Stop being a creeper,” Bambam pouted. “Maybe he’s in love,” Yugyeom squealed. Jaebum turned his head to look at Yugyeom. “I swear if you don’t-” “Quick!! She’s coming this way!” Youngjae yelled.

The seven men shifted quickly to not look out of the ordinary. Jaebum pretends to read a book, but really he’s watching her make her way out the cafe, still unaware that she may have gained a not-so secret admirer. Once she stepped foot outside, they all sighed in unison. “That was too close!! Hyung, I swear if we ever get caught in public casually, it’s going to be your fault!” Jackson whined. Jaebum wasn’t listening to him, he was still immersed by her as she slowly began to fade out of sight. “Umm.... earth to hyung?” “Sorry to burst everyone’s bubble but we have practice in 15 minutes and I have a feeling we might have to drag him out of here by force,” Mark proclaimed. “Jaebum, let’s go! Practice! We have a concert tomorrow.” “Oh sorry,” he said finally snapping out of his trance. The seven men began to head towards the exit after throwing their garbage away. Jinyoung gives Jaebum a concerned look. Jaebum nods and Jinyoung nods in return. “I hate it when they do that, like why can’t they tell me what they’re thinking,” Bambam whispered to Yugyeom. “Enough you two, before we really get in trouble,” he snarled at the two maknaes.

Later that evening, they had returned to their hotel to rest. Jaebum went to sit outside on the balcony staring into the moonlight sky. He couldn’t stop thinking about her, but why her? Was it because of how beautiful she looked with her long straight dark hair and floral print blouse reading in the cafe? Or was it fate? “Hyung, are you okay?” Jinyoung asked while taking a seat next to him. “If I told you I was, you’d know I’d be lying.” “What’s going on? You weren’t yourself earlier, who is she?” “Jinyoung, I don’t know her but I feel like I do.” Jinyoung gave him a confused look. “I think it’s fate.” “Keep... going...” “I think she’s meant to be in my ife but I don’t know how.” “You think she’s your soulmate?” “Not exactly, but it feels like we’re meant for each other in an emotional way.” “Whoa... slow down, are you in love?” “I don’t think so? But I want to see her again.” “Jaebum hyung, I think I get what you’re saying but please be careful. There’s so much at risk if this keeps going. Think about her if something were to happen.” Jaebum looked down, he knew Jinyoung wasn’t entirely wrong. “Hey don’t be down, we have a big day tomorrow. Go get some rest, we can talk after.” They walked back inside together, but Jaebum couldn’t get her out of his head.

The next day was nothing but busyness. Performing for the first time in a new city meant a lot to them. Their rehearsal runs kept them focused. “I see you’re back to normal, JB,” Mark smirked. “Look we have to put up a memorable show. Nothing should hold us back,” Jaebum said while smiling. Concert time rolled along the way. The venue was full, the crowd was wild, the green ocean lit the venue up so brightly. They knew what they had to do, put up one hell of a show. After two songs, the boys began to introduce themselves. “Come and get it, we are GOT7.” The crowd cheered loudly. Seeing all their baby birds brought smiles to their faces. They never felt so blessed in their lives. As Jackson began to go on a tangent, Youngjae walked over to Jaebum to whisper something. “Isn’t that her?” Jaebum loooked into the direction Youngjae’s eyes pointed at, he couldn’t believe his own eyes. She was there, the girl from the cafe who stopped him in his tracks. She was right in front of him smiling while holding her ahgabong and a fan with his face plastered on it. He smiled at her while making eye contact with her for a quick moment before introducing the next number.

Each member’s solo numbers came rolling around one by one. Finally, it was Jaebum’s number, the last of the bunch. He walked out in a white dress shirt with a black blazer and pants holding a small bouquet of flowers. the music began to play and the crowd screamed recognizing the instrumental for Q. As the bridge approached, he began to make his way towards the crowd. The screams of many girls could be heard but he only had his eyes set on one girl. Finally, he reached his destination, right in front of her. I just want a Q. Jaebum suddenly stopped singing but the music kept playing. Their eyes finally met; he shyly handed her the flowers. In return, she gave him a shy smile which he thought was one of the most beautiful he ever laid his eyes on. Jaebum then asked a fan nearby to take a picture of the two and gave her a hug as he transitioned into finishing the song. The crowd was overjoyed, some were crying while others were cheering for her.

After Jaebum’s solo ended, a VCR played on the screen. As he walked back stage, he could hear the roars of his loudest members. “HYUNG!!!” Jackson yelled while rushing over to give him a hug. All the members congratulated him, they never though a moment off camera that could have caused commotion would actually be a blessing. Amidst the chaos of Jackson’s back-breaking hug, Youngjae screaming at the top of his lungs, Bambam and Yugyeom squealing like school girls, and Mark laughing at his members, Jaebum and Jinyoung managed to shoot a look at each other. Jinyoung smiled at Jaebum, he couldn’t help but think maybe Jaebum’s talk about being meant for this girl was fate itself. If Jaebum was happy, then he should be happy.

The concert resumed before anyone knew it, it was time for the Hi-Touch event. There was mutual joy between the boys and their fans. As the line started to whine down, a familiar face began to approach the members, one by one she greeted each member until she reached the last member, Jaebum. “Thank you for the flowers,” she told him. “Oh... you’re welcome.” Jaebum could feel his ears burning up and he was ready to drop kick Bambam and Yugyeom for their not so subtle giggles. She gave him one last smile before walking off. Before anyone knew it, another concert for the books was finished. The boys stared at each other in silence for a bit. “I don’t think hyung got her name..” Youngjae said with concern. Jaebum looked down after Youngjae’s statement. Of all the things to do, he didn’t get her name. “Flower girl.” The boys turned around to Jinyoung. “She wore a floral shirt at the cafe, she wore a floral dress tonight. Jaebum gave her flowers, it makes sense.” “You know I kind of like it, what do you think JB?” Mark asked. “I like it,” he said with a smile. “Flower boy,” Yugyeom jokingly called him. Bambam joined him which resulted in death stares from their leader as they left the venue.

The sun was barely out the next morning and Jaebum was already up bright and early. He went up to the rooftop of a nearby building to watch the sunrise. While the sunrise did help put him at ease, he couldn’t help feeling sad. They were leaving this new city soon and he knew nothing of a girl who stopped him in his tracks. He felt that something would be missing from this trip and knowing, he may not see this girl again. He closed his eyes and tried to clear his thoughts. He felt relaxed but suddenly he opened his eyes upon hearing a voice. “Can I join you?” Jaebum looked up, he couldn’t believe his eyes. She was right in front of him again, the flower girl. “Umm... yea.” She sat down right next to him. Jaebum couldn’t help but take a quick look at her. She was so beautiful just like the first time he laid eyes on her. She turned and looked at him. “You’re not afraid of getting caught out here?” she asked. “I didn’t think anyone else would come up here at this time. What brings you here?” “I like to watch the sunrise, that’s if I can.” “Me too, so am I your favorite?” She smiled at him and nodded. Jaebum wanted to slap himself for asking the obvious. He never realized how awkward he was until now. She turned to look at the sky. “It’s a beautiful sky.” Jaebum was still staring at her. He wanted every second to count. She finally stood up and began to walk towards the stairs. “I don’t want to keep holding you up, so I better get going.” “Wait,” Jaebum said as he grabbed her hand. “I know this sounds crazy but I saw you at the bubble tea cafe a few days ago and I thought you were very beautiful and I still think you’re beautiful. I don’t know why but I don’t think any of this was by chance.” She looked at him with confusion. Jaebum pulled out a small box from his pocket. He took out a ring with a bird on it and slipped it on her finger. He meant to give this ring to her last night, but Bambam hid it from him because he thought Jaebum was being too cheesy for his own good. He placed his thumb on the ring. “I don’t think we’re soulmates, but I think you’re meant for me as I am meant for you. Please stay with me. Stay with me and GOT7.” “I think I kind of get it too, we aren’t soulmates, but I’m not going anywhere. You are my home.” She gave him the sweetest smile when she called him her home. Jaebum smiled back at her and slowly brought his other hand to her cheek and leaned in closer and pressed his lips on hers. He wasn’t rough or needy with his kiss. He was gentle, he didn’t want to break her. He knew how much of a risk he just took, but he didn’t care, he wanted to make a moment they’d both remember. He was too caught up in the moment to realize that she gently kissed him back. As he broke away, he brought his hand down from her cheek to her other hands. “Promise me, I’ll see you again, even if it’s not for a long time.” She nodded her head, and then Jaebum let got of her hands. “See you soon, Jaebum.”

He watched her as she walked towards the stairs, Before he knew it, she was out of sight. He turned to look at the sky. She was right, it was a beautiful sky. He sighed realizing he still didn’t get her name, but somehow that didn’t bother him anymore. He turned to walk towards the stairs and thought to himself. “I know this may not have been the way we wanted things to turn out, but thank you. You are my flower girl, my beautiful sky. We might not be together but as long as we have each other, that’s all that matters. I promise next time, I will know your name.”

[joohoneyhoe]

Push and Pull| Eight

[song inspiration: Bts - House of Cards]

|Chapter One| |Chapter Two| |Chapter Three| |Chapter Four| |Chapter Five| |Chapter Six| |Chapter Seven| |Chapter Eight| |Chapter Nine|

pairing: Jimin x oc x Jaebum genre: angst word count: 1.6k a/n: Isolde spent three years with Jimin after meeting him by chance in a dance studio. He was perfect and he loved her, she thought he was the one she’d spend the rest of her life with. That all crumbles when he decides he wants to please his parents and leave her so he can be with someone like him. Isolde is plummeted into turmoil and leaves her job as a choreographer to move back home to the states. A mutual friend named Im Jaebum reaches out to console her, lift her back up from her fragile state. It’s a push and pull tug between what she thought she had and what she could have.

“I’ve gotta go, Jimin. Bye.”

She hung up. She hung up on me. Nothing but a simple bye. She wasn’t interested in talking to me at all. It would have been four years today and she didn’t seem to have a single care. Though, how could I fault her? I left her, not the other way around. I tossed my phone onto the bed of my fiancé Soomi, not wanting to even look at it anymore. I’d just end up going back and looking at all the pictures of us I had hidden in a secret file in my phone. 

Did she really not care at all? Why did it hurt so much to think she was over it so soon? It’s not like I hadn’t moved on. Fuck, I was engaged already. Soomi was wonderful, kind, beautiful and my family loved her. But, did I? I thought I did. I wanted to. I really did.

Every single time I told her I loved her, I’d flash back to the conversation I had with Yoongi the night I left Isolde. The night I cried until I couldn’t anymore, my body shaking beyond my control. My heart ripped out by my own hand. That conversation, it repeating in my brain, endlessly. What he said to me, was something I could never forget, despite my best efforts.

“I understand why you’re doing it Jimin. I do. You know my parents, they’re just like yours. They’re traditional, have a set idea how my life should be and no shame telling me if I’m not doing it right. But, if I was in love with someone of a different race, the way you are with Isolde, you wouldn’t be able to fucking stop me. I wouldn’t give a flying fuck what my parents said about it. If I had cared about what they deemed best for me, I wouldn’t be where I am right now.

You can’t help who you love and nothing but that, matters in this shitty place we call home. Not what color their skin is, where they’re from, what our fans think or what your parents think. Ultimately it’s your life, Jimin. Are you willing to let her go? Lose her forever, because you will, we both know Isolde. She won’t let this happen to her again. Are you ready to lose it all for the sake of tradition?”

I was so sure that’s what I wanted. So sure, the approval of my parents was the most important thing in the world to me. More important than my love for her. I was so sure, so sure I’d be able to let her go and love someone else the way I did her. Unfortunately, it didn’t seem to working out in my favor. She was etched into every part of my very being. Her touch had left hand prints on my skin, her laugh on a constant loop in my mind, her entire being linked to me forever.

“Jimin, what are you doing in here by yourself? I thought we were going to watch a movie together?” Soomi’s voice called out as she appeared in the doorway, a concerned expression on her round face. She really was gorgeous, any Korean man would be beyond grateful to have someone as beautiful as her. Her long black hair framed her face nicely, her skin flawless. She was petite, all of her smaller than myself, soft bodied and gentle in every way. But, she still wasn’t Isolde.

“I’m not really feeling up to it now, Soomi. It’s been a long day.” I told her, her face falling, clearly disappointed. 

“You look upset, Jiminie. Is there anything I can do to fix it?” she questioned, stepping into the room to stand in front of me so she could reach out and touch my face. I shied away from her gesture of endearment, not wanting anyone to touch me. No one but, Isolde. I could tell my disinterest was hurting her, simply by the look in her big brown eyes.

“Can we just go to bed?” I questioned, taking her small hand in mine, trying to make up for being cold to her. She smiled. It was beautiful, it really was. But, it wasn’t Isolde’s.

“Of course we can, baby. You need your rest.” she turned and went to get pajamas on, heading into the bathroom. I stripped down, grabbing basketball shorts and a t-shirt from my bag. I could hear the sink running, no doubt washing her face, like she did every night. All it made me think about was Isolde and how little she cared about having a routine before going to bed. So many times, I got after her for sleeping with her makeup on and she’d just tell me to suck it.

That’s what I missed most. I missed her wit, sarcasm, snappy comebacks and absolutely ridiculous sense of humor. She was always fun to be around, no matter the situation. She had always made everything better, brighter. Soomi was beautiful, supportive and kind. But, she was a typical traditional Korean woman. She didn’t say inappropriate things or make crude jokes. And if I did, she usually scolded me gently. 

I’d gotten so used to Isolde’s Americanized tendencies, that it was hard to switch back to my own culture’s. She didn’t care about swearing, saying things that were entirely too inappropriate and laughing when she shouldn’t. She had said once,

“This is who I am. I swear too much, I don’t dress feminine unless I have to, I’m loud and crazy. But I love me and I refuse to change for fucking anyone. You can either love me too or hate me. I could care less.” 

I missed that. I missed the freedom I felt when I was around her, being able to not care right alongside of her. That was gone now and I had what my family had always wanted. Traditional.

Soomi came out of the bathroom, clad in a matching pajama set that covered everything. That was another thing I missed so desperately. Isolde would only ever wear my shirts to bed, no underwear and bare legs always tangling with mine. I loved being able to feel her skin under my fingers as she would lay against me, hair tickling my naked chest. I always wore clothes to bed with Soomi, it upset her if I didn’t. Isolde had always encouraged me not to, she would always say,

“Don’t put clothes on, Jiminie. I want to feel your skin against mine. It helps me sleep.”

Soomi carefully got into bed, rubbing my back to signal me to lay down. I crawled under the covers next to her, spooning her like I always did. She rested her hand over mine, like always and got comfortable. It wasn’t long before she was sound asleep, soft breathing leaving her parted lips. 

I couldn’t help but go back to thinking about Isolde as I held Soomi. Her body didn’t fit against me the same way her’s had, she was much smaller. It was a feeling I still wasn’t used to. Isolde was built so much…sturdier. She was tall compared to Korean women, but no less beautiful. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t even pretend it was her that was laying beside me. 

Why was I doing this to myself? I had a fiancé. A fiancé who loved me, supported me and did whatever she could to take care of me. She was amazing, optimistic and genuine. So why couldn’t I stop thinking about Isolde when I was with her? I shouldn’t think about her at all, not while I was holding Soomi.

What if she had moved on too? Why did the thought of another man touching her the way I used to, making her cry out for more, make me feel so angry? I had no right to feel angry about that, but I most certainly did. She had every right to move on, especially after what I had put her through. But, the selfish part of me didn’t want her to move on. It wanted her to keep loving me and maybe one day, pick up the phone and tell me she still did after all these months apart.

After our conversation on the phone tonight, that looked less and less probable. Fuck. I wanted to forget. I wanted to be happy with the choice I had made. I wanted to feel the same when Soomi told me she loved me, as I had when Isolde did. That butterfly feeling in your stomach, goosebumps running along your skin, all from three simple words.

I love you.

I didn’t feel that with her. I couldn’t feel that with Soomi and I knew that. I only ever wanted to make my family happy. Make them proud of me in all aspects of my life, including my relationship. They were happy. They had accepted Soomi like she was their own daughter almost immediately and she loved every second of it. Then why wasn’t I happy?

Why couldn’t my parents have been that loving and accepting of Isolde? She was never anything but kind, respectful and understanding towards them. She knew flat out, that they didn’t like her. Simply because she wasn’t Korean and yet, she maintained her kindness and understanding. For three years she handled the criticism and disdain with grace and dignity like no one I’d ever known. Any normal human being would have broken down and said enough was enough. But, not her. She took it like it was nothing, always letting it roll right off her back.

I missed her. Plain and simple. There was nothing I could do to fix the mistake I’d made now. She was done with me and I was supposed to be done with her. Moved on and with the woman I was meant to be with all along. Not her. But, all I felt was regret.

I made my bed and now I had to lie in it.

[seawitch62]

The Collector

(Just for fun 😀 Word count 161)

Jay Park

Management and staff groan inwardly, he posted what?

'Officially collecting bras all over the world, Jay Park aka Mr Won Soju aka The Bra collector.

#newsuperheroname.'

Repercussions! Time to get out the battle gear!

Fuck!

■

Word spread like wildfire, the fans squealed and giggled, the haters and trolls began their March.

Environmental groups demanded, "Do you donate these bras? Or do you throw them in the trash?!".

Women's rights groups are up in arms, "sexist" "chauvinist".

Other Women's groups support  the bra throwing craze sweeping the globe.

"He has sexualized himself therefore women are in their rights to throw their lingerie if they so wish!".

Groups of Mothers were not impressed  with their daughters wasting their money in such a  way.

"Perv" "creep" these words were tossed around like yesterday's salad.

Protesters swarm AOMG, marching and chanting. 

Total chaos ensues.

Jay Park monitors the mayhem.

"What the fuck! Why are they on my case? I'm just the collector".

[clubtuan]

Date day with bf!Yugyeom 

should I write a series ?

[parkhabits]

A Promise to Keep {Part 1}

Jinyoung x OC x Jaebum Genre: fluff/angst Warnings: heartbreak, brain tumor, death

Next Chapter

The sound of beeping woke her up, an incessant sound she was used to. She sat up, feeling the ache and pain in her neck and lower back from falling asleep in the rigid chair.

The nurse walked in “Good morning, I’m just going to check on his IV lines”.  She smiled at the nurse, moving her chair closer to his bedside grabbing hold of his hand. She watched as the nurse pressed buttons on the IV pump, bringing the persistent beeping to a stop. The nurse looked at her and smiled, “Do you need me to bring you anything? A warm blanket?”

 She shook her head, “No thank you.” Her gaze reverting back to her husband who lied in bed still sleeping.

 “I’ll be back to check on him in a bit.” Glancing at him once more the nurse left.

 She stroked her thumb against the back of his hand and then brought his hands up to her lips and kissed it. His eyes fluttered open, a smile forming across his lips when he saw her beside him.

 “Good Morning beautiful,” his voice husky.

 “Hi handsome,” her hand still grasping his, a soft smile across her face.

 Jinyoung tried sitting up and adjusting his position in bed but barely moved an inch, “I told you not to stay the night again, you should be home in our bed sleeping.”

She brushed the hair away from his forehead, “It’s too empty without you. I’d rather be here by your side.” She didn’t want to miss any moment spent with him.

Jinyoung’s eye closed again, drowsiness was something she was used to now. Most of the day was spent watching him sleep. She preferred that then the times when he was in pain from the excruciating headaches or the overwhelming phases of nausea he would go through. When he was sleeping, he was peaceful.

 They were married for three beautiful years and had been dating for eight before that. She had moved from another city and when she stepped into the classroom Jinyoung knew he wanted to make her his. Which is what he did. All throughout high school and college they dated. They fought over the little things and joked about them too. Even after being together for so long he was still nervous when he asked her if she would spend the rest of his life with him and his heart filled with overwhelming amounts of joy when she said yes. They got married, travelled to places around the world, settled in a three bedroom bungalow with a white picket fence and a yard so that the dog they owned together would have enough space to roam around, and they dreamt of having children together. Growing old together. The past 3 months changed everything. It started when Jinyoung stayed home from work one day due to a bad headache. When she returned home she found him lying in the kitchen unconscious, and he was immediately rushed to the hospital. That was when their life changed forever. Jinyoung was diagnosed with a brain a tumor. More specifically, glioma of the frontal lobe. They could treat his symptoms, but could not cure him. Her world stopped when the doctor’s declared it terminal. From that moment on the color disappeared from her world and she was left only seeing shades of grey. She stayed by his side. Never returning home, any belongings or change of clothes she needed Jinyoung’s mom or her mom would bring. She became accustomed to the routines of the hospital, even taking on some of the care for him herself. There were good days and bad days. The good days were when Jinyoung and her could walk down the hospital hallway hand in hand, leaving the walls of the room they were secluded too most other days  or when they would watch tv, snuggled on the single mattress of the hospital bed, almost feeling like they were at home. The bad days were when Jinyoung would look at her and not remember who she was, what they meant to each other, his personality different than the one she was used to. A common symptom for the kind of brain tumor he was diagnosed with.  On those days she would excuse herself from the room and find a hidden corner in the hospital where she wept. He never remembered any of those moments and she kept it to herself because she knew it would pain him.

 “Knock, knock” Jaebum leaned against the doorway.

 She sat up, wiping the tear that had rolled down her cheek. Fixing her posture to look more positive and put together than she actually was.

 “Hey,” Jaebum gave her a nod as he entered the room and sat on the chair on the opposite side of the bed.

 Jinyoung opened his eyes at the sound of Jaebum’s voice. He smiled then turned his head to him, “Hey bro, looking good” he said as he admired Jaebum’s leather jacket.

 “Definitely better than you,” Jaebum snickered.

 She could only roll her eyes at his comment. How can he joke like that? Im Jaebum was Jinyoung’s best friend since childhood. She never understood why, as they were polar opposites. Jinyoung was captain of the volleyball team, vice president external of the student body, accepted on a full ride scholarship to his university and a team lead at the company he worked at. Jaebum spent more time in detention than in actual classes, loved to party and spend his leisure activities with women, he became a well known record producer and emanated the “bad boy” image. Yet their friendship was everlasting. After all this time she didn’t know how she felt about Jaebum. There were times he was cold to her, most of the time it felt like he didn’t acknowledge her presence. She was polite to him for Jinyoung’s sake but could never warm up to him the way she did with others. There was just something about him that made her keep her guard up.

Jinyoung tried sitting up, she helped adjust the bed upright and arranged the pillows behind him. He gave her a thankful smile. Since Jaebum was there she decided to take the time stretch her legs and give the two friend’s some time together. She leaned down and kissed Jinyoung on the forehead. “I’m going to go get some coffee from downstairs.”

 “I love you” Jinyoung said as he grabbed her hand as she turned.

 She leaned down and pressed her lips gently against his, “I love you.”

 Jinyoung watched as his wife left the room, Jaebum barely looked her way. When she was out of the room Jinyoung sighed and leaned his head back. The movement of sitting up made him nauseous. He looked at Jaebum, “This isn’t good for her and it isn’t fair to her. She deserves more.”

 “You’re the best there is,” Jaebum smiled, he tried to maintain his usual self around Jinyoung. Even though it pained him to see his best friend in this state.

 Jinyoung let out a small laugh as he shook his head, “Can I ask you something?”

 “If you’re going to ask me give you a bed bath, then my answer is no” Jaebum chuckled, but he saw the expression on Jinyoung’s face and his smile slowly faded. “What is it?”

 Jinyoung looked up at the ceiling, trying to find the right words to say. “Take care of her for me? You know, when I’m gone.”

 “Don’t say stuff like that.” Jaebum’s brows furrowed, his heart sinking at the request of his friend.

 Jinyoung smiled at his friend, “I have to, I need to make sure she’ll be in good hands. That she’ll have someone to watch over her, especially because I won’t be able to.”

It was silent as Jaebum reflected on his words, “She doesn’t even like me.”

 “She’ll warm up to you,” his eyes crinkled as he let out a laugh, “Promise me?”

 Jaebum nodded, “I’ll try my best bro.”

When she returned Jaebum was gone and Jinyoung was flipping through channels on the tv.

“Come here” he made space beside  him on the bed and held out his arms, patting to the space beside him.

She nestled into the space, resting her head in the crook of his neck. He  wrapped both arms around her, taking in her scent, feeling her warmth beside him.

“I love you,” he whispered as he kissed the top of her forehead.

She snuzzled in closer, “I love you too,” taking comfort in the rise and fall of chest as he breathed.

“Have I told you how lucky I am to have you?” he said as he glanced down at her.

She smiled and looked up at him, “Countless of times.”

“Good, I want to tell you as much as possible.” Kissing her forehead again, he tightened his arms around her.

Something about the way he said it made the smile fade away slightly, she tried not to dwell about it. She didn’t want to think of the future, she only wanted to remain in this moment as long as possible. In his arms, feeling the warmth of his body and the sound of his breathing. She wanted the slow dances in the kitchen, the evening walks by the river with their dog, she would even settle for the minuscule tasks of grocery shopping with him, washing dishes while he dried. She clung to the hope however dim it was that it would be possible, but their talks of the future died. There were no more talks of children, no trips being planned. They both lived in the moment, holding onto whatever time remained. Loving each other as much as they could, expressing their love every chance they got. She closed her eyes while he held her, imagining the future they had always talked about as she drifted off to sleep.

The next week Jaebum wandered into the hospital, he whistled as he rode the elevator to the floor that Jinyoung was on. A deck of cards in his front jacket pocket as he wanted to see if Jinyoung was up for a card game.  As he walked down the hallway towards the room, a group of people pushed past him and straight into Jinyoung’s room. His heart stopped, and he found himself running after them. Panting he stopped at the doorway to see chaos in the room, persistent commands being shouted from the doctor as nurses rushed to gather supplies and follow orders given. She was there, in the corner of the room begging for Jinyoung to wake up. The nurse’s grabbed her arm to try and lead her out of the room but she couldn’t, she wouldn’t. Eventually another nurse assisted and grabbed hold of her as they lead her towards the doorway. Her focus only on Jinyoung as she wept, when she saw Jaebum by the door she ran into his arms in agony.  He didn’t say anything, he only held her as he watched. Her head was buried in his chest and he stroked the back of her hair to comfort her. Then the long extended beep from the heart monitor filled the room. She sobbed into his chest unceasingly, hands clutching at his jacket.  He held her in silence, his cheek pressed against her head as he continuously stroked the back of her head as if to have her not turn around. He watched as the team were doing everything in their power. The beads of sweat dripping from the doctor’s and nurses, as Jinyoung lied still on the bed, his color faded from his face and eyes closed. Amidst all the chaos he could faintly hear the words Jinyoung spoke to him last week as he held her weeping in his arms.

 “Take care of her.”

 ~Lea

Let me know what you think! :)

[sunkissedjiaer]

Promises / Yugyeom x OC

Pairing: Yugyeom x OC

Warnings: huge amounts of fluff

Word Count: 1,412

Summary: After surprising Yugyeom with your idea of a cute date for your guys’ two month anniversary he quickly brings out something that seals your fate together, you’d think Netflix and chill was an easy way to sum up a date well try Netflix and promise rings.

a/n: This story is dedicated and made for my friend Leanna who is actually the OC within this short drabble/story. Her friend Megan is actually me as well hehe. Initially I wasn’t going to share this as it was just made for Leanna but I thought it was too cute not to, either way I hope you enjoy it xx<3

-

You had the entire night planned out, you were going to surprise Yugyeom when he got home with a home cooked meal and chocolate shakes to go with it, because those were his favorite. Turning on the tv you went to Netflix and pulled up ‘Descendants of the Sun’ because that was his all time favorite drama and you finally had time to binge watch it with him.

Grabbing your phone from the couch you called up Jackson’s girlfriend, she was a good friend of yours and was currently with the boys, she was going to let you know when Yugyeom was on his way home so you could light the candles in advance.

A couple rings sounded before the call was picked up.

“What’s up Leanna?” Megan sounded, her tone cheerful.

“Is Yugyeom leaving yet?”

“Uh no him and Jackson are distracted with the new choreo”

You could hear the music blaring and the sound of laughter, yep, they were definitely distracted.

“Is there any chance that you can shoot him my way? Maybe say that you and Jackson have plans?”

Megan laughed softly “Jackson is too dense to realize what I’m doing but I will try, hang on a moment”

“Jacky” Megan cooed “we gotta go, remember we have plans tonight”

“What?” Jackson questioned, his voice echoing through the line. You couldn’t help but laugh at the way Jackson said ‘what’, his voice  was filled with pure confusion.

“Babe…” Megan drawled “remember how I said that we had those plans.. Tonight… in our house.. You know.. Those plans..”

Jackson squealed so loud you could’ve sworn he busted your eardrum. Moving the phone away from your ear you waited a minute before returning it back to hear what was going on.

“Sorry Gyeommie but Megan and I gotta go” Jackson chuckled “like now.”

“Okay I’m back” Megan laughed “Jackson and I now have real plans so Yugyeom should be coming your way shortly”

With your interest peaked you couldn’t help but ask “what’re your plans?”

“Probably just rough sex either that or we have a rap battle… it’s honestly up to Jackson”

The two of you shared a series of laughs and wheezes before saying your goodbyes. Throwing your phone on the couch you ran around the living room lighting little scented candles and throwing around roses on the nearby pillows, amidst throwing the roses you heard the sound of keys jingling by the front door, quickly you threw the rest of the rose petals and yourself down onto the mess of blankets and pillows.

“Babe I’m home” called out Yugyeom, his voice quickly fading. His eyes roamed around the room, he was in complete awe.

Jumping up you also made Yugyeom jump, except he went up five more feet than you did.

“Surprise!” you grinned “happy two months baby!”

Striding towards you Yugyeom wrapped his arms around your waste and planted a kiss on your forehead. Looking up at him the two of you smiled warmly, pulling him closer you rested your head on his chest.

“Do you like it?” you asked, your voice muffled by his sweatshirt.

“I love it.. Thank you”

Pulling away Yugyeom looked down at you “but uh I have a surprise for you too.” Guiding you to the couch Yugyeom sat you down and made you close your eyes, of course he also made you pinky promise that you wouldn’t peak.

Yugyeom got down on his knee and pulled out a red velvet jewelry box, after situating himself he gave you the okay to open your eyes, slowly you opened them and your jaw immediately dropped at the sight.

“Y-Yugye”

“Just listen” he ordered softly “I’m not proposing, yet… but right now I can give you this promise ring.. Because I Kim Yugyeom promise to never leave your side even if you get on my nerves and I promise to always hold you when you need to be held and I promise to fulfill your wishes as best as I can.. Even if it’s only been two months I know that I love you, and I know that I will only grow to love you more”

You were completely awestruck, you never thought that this would happen, you only dreamt. Right here, right now, your boyfriend, the man who had swept you off your feet was promising you everything you could ever ask for.

“So” he muttered, his eyes growing soft upon your gaze “is that a yes?”

Jumping up from your spot you tackled Yugyeom to the floor, his arms wrapping around you. You frantically pecked kisses all over his face, saving his lips for last. Pulling away from Yugyeom’s soft lips you noticed how his cheeks bled into a deep red, a sight you never tired of seeing.

“Of course it’s a yes” you hummed, your voice dripping with affection.

Sitting yourselves up, Yugyeom grabbed your hand and placed the ring onto your ring finger. Silently you admired it, the three carat diamond glinted under the soft candle light, executing its beauty.

“How much was it?” you murmured to yourself

Scratching his neck Yugyeom chuckled awkwardly “how about we don’t talk about the price, instead.. Tell me how much you like it?”

Looking up you smiled brightly “I love it- I mean how could I not?”

“I’m glad” Yugyeom hummed, his hands grabbing yours “Jackson helped me pick it out..”

You cocked your head slightly “Jackson knows how to pick out rings?”

“Well, don’t tell her but.. Jackson is going to propose to Megan soon.. They’ve been together for almost nine months and he said he needs to marry her otherwise he’ll go crazy” Yugyeom chuckled softly.

“That’s amazing! But as much as I love them enough about them..” you paused, shoving Yugyeom onto the floor “tonight is our night”

After enjoying the dinner you had made the two of you got comfortable on the floor in front of the tv, using the pillows and blankets thrown there you both created a bed to call yours for the night. Laying your head on his chest, Yugyeom wrapped his arm around you and pulled you closer, slowly he rested his head on yours.

The two of you sat cuddled up together watching dramas for hours when you began to hear the soft snores of your boyfriend next to you. Surprisingly you were able to get Yugyeom up long enough to help him into the bedroom.

“Babe you are gonna regret falling asleep in your clothes” you sighed

“Just take them off then” he groaned, laying himself onto the bed.

Rolling your eyes you undressed Yugyeom, it was easier than expected because he was basically a limp noodle. After getting him down into his boxers you allowed him to get under the covers and curl up.

After slipping into one of Yugyeom’s shirts you slid into bed, slowly you scooted yourself next to Yugyeom who instinctively wrapped his arms around your body and pulled you into his chest, his head in your hair, his breath tickling your ear.

“Hmp” he grunted

“Yes?”

“I love you Leanna” Yugyeom cooed softly, his tone warm and affectionate.

After letting the feeling of his breath fade from your skin you spun yourself around, your head in his chest.

“Hey..” you hummed

Opening his eyes just enough to see you, Yugyeom raised his eyebrow “what?”

“I love you more baby boy”

Giggling to himself Yugyeom snuggled himself closer to you. The warmth of his body and the soft sound of his heartbeat lulled you to sleep slowly, each moment throughout the day played through your head until you found yourself grinning foolishly. Shaking the thoughts away you focused on Yugyeom and found yourself slipping into sleep for the night.

[offshore-writes-blog]

searching for a roommate: maybe also love (4/5)

soulmates!au  (part 4/5)

part 1/ part 2/ part 3/

genre: angstttt and yearning (so same thing?) pairing: Mark x OC inspired by prompt: (i’ll add the link of the list when i find it) 8. “You’re so fucking hot when you’re mad.” 100. ”You’re my soulmate?!”  even soulmates have a hard time admitting they want each other

when i come home from work, mark’s home unlike last night. i should’ve expected that though; he’d been drinking last night and he doesn’t work on weekends. when he hears me, mark’s looking at me with his cute eyes, head turning expectingly to me. there’s even a grin on his face. god, i wish he wasn’t so cute.

“hey, arista!”

“don’t hey arista me.” i feign annoyance as i make my way to my room. why am i even pretending to be mad? because it’s just easier than being freaked out about what i saw on mark this morning. it makes me a little mad at my life because when am i going to get an actual soulmate; not one who’s going to leave me when they meet the actual love of their life.

sensing my fake tone, he chuckles. “i’m really sorry about last night.” he tries, almost following me into my room. “i think i have something to make it up.” god, he’s even actively trying to sound cute; knowing that i’ll crack. BE STRONG ARISTA.

“it’s fine. i was just kidding.” forcing out a small smile, i start closing my door. “i’m really tired so i’m just gonna…sleep.” i look at him a little longer before really closing my door. it literally feels like i ripped my heart out my chest because i could see the playfulness on his face completely fade.

i don’t sleep. i text jackson instead. --text-- arista: about those blind dates.. jackSUN: is horny arista on the rise? arista: SHUT UP maybe yeah definitely set me up jackSUN: are you sure arista: did it ever stop you before GOD jackSUN: right right right right he disappears a while after that. i assume nothing of it. he’s a busy man so i put my phone away only to have it beep with jaebum’s texts. jb: why are you suddenly going on a blind date arista: does jackson ever shut up you two are so dating…………. i literally just texted him jb: we’re together right now seeing as we work together as musicians u know remember when you used to sit here annoying us at our music studio arista: whatever jb: is there anything you wanna tell me? arista: not with jackson there jb: we can meet arista: it’s not that deep Bro chill

i try to lie.

jb: who said it has to be

and out of all the times he’s believed my lies; he sees through me this time. i groan into my pillow. i wallow in my own reality for a while; trying to remember everything that’s happened with mark and i. which is really nothing but... it feels like something. me discovering him as my soulmate.... then i text jaebum. 

arista: after you and jackson are done recording text me don’t let that idiot know say u got a booty call or whatever u must say that a lot anyway jb: wtf first of all r u calling me a whore? second of all ok see u later arista: yeah we can fight it out defSOUL

when i step out my room at around 1:30am, all the lights are out. mark must be sleeping already. i don’t even hear the incessant clicking of his mouse which is normally present at this time when he’s playing whatever frat boy video game.

jaebum’s waiting at the front gate of the apartment complex. only gives me a nod when i reach him and starts leading the way to the convenience store near my place; which is where we’ve had many late night talks. normally with our third companion, jackson.

“how’s the new track coming along?” i try to make conversation as we walk in the literal dead of night. only the sound of our shoes scratching the pavement and shallow breathing in the chilly air, jaebum scoffs and laughs at me a little. it’s dark but i know there’s a fucking smug smirk on his face.

“stop trying to distract me.”

i push him. “is it a crime to be interested in your music?”

“i know you are. but we’re here to talk about something else.”

“right.” i mumble. “it’s about mark.”

“hmmmmmm.” he says in a higher pitch and nudges me with his elbow. “i knewwww it!” 

i scoff and try to look over at him but i only see half his face with the street lights so low and orange. “it’s not what you think. i think he and i are soulmates.”

“what?” he stops mid-step and turns to face me completely.

i begin to explain; how i saw the mark, how i feel about mark and how gut-wrenchingly sad i will be when mark, unsurprisingly, leaves me for his actual romantic soulmate. by the time i’m done talking, we’re finally at the store and jaebum’s been quiet mostly.

when he finally starts to talk, he stops. following his eyes, i look to see mark. jaebum and i are only two steps into the store while i notice that mark’s already gotten everything he needs; holding a large plastic bag. i can even tell what he’s bought, having eaten most of those snacks with him. the memories of such nights makes my heart warm; my entire body actually...but NO NO NO, i shouldn’t feel this way.

“hey mark.” jaebum’s the first to speak with an easy smile. “what’s up?”

“jb, what’re you doing out so late?” mark also says but his smile falters for a second but he manages to smile again.

“mark, i thought you were asleep.” why the fuck did i add that?

“and i thought you were asleep.” mark says immediately without glancing at me but pretending to look into his bag.

“yeah, well. she was.” jaebum lies for me. “but…i…had something to…talk to her about…” he speaks slowly; eyes looking up, probably trying think of another lie to back it up.

“oh.” is all mark says and clears his throat.

“yeah, and since he’s so busy. 2am is really the only good time.” i smile and pretend to elbow jaebum; feigning annoyance.

mark forces a smile. “yeah, well. i was gaming and got hungry. turns out, we were all out of snacks.” he shrugs and looks at me during the last part. “so, here i am.”

“god, stop gaming so much.” jaebum teases with a chuckle. “you’re only stroking your ego at this point. you make video games for a living.” this makes mark actually laugh; shaking his head. this puts my heart at ease just a little.

silence again. the three of us stand there for a few moments too long. mark finally clears his throat and says, “well, i’ll leave you guys to it.” before walking past us.

“see you next week, man.” jaebum remarks, about the beach trip we’d all be taking over the long weekend but we don’t hear mark reply.

// when jaebum drops me off, it’s about 3:24am. we’d eaten instant noodles and drunk his favourite strawberry milk whilst being serious adults and discussed my impending future as an old maid.

“i think you’re overthinking this, arista.” he’d shrugged shoulders so easily, wiping the corners of his lips after breathing in the ramyeon we were meant to ‘share’. “you won’t even give mark a chance? ray was gay but mark’s pretty straight from what i’ve seen.” he laughs.

“yeah, you are too. but you never saw me that way.”

“we aren’t soulmates.”

“fuck.” i mutter, he’d cornered me there. groaning into my hands, i feel even more tensed than before. “that’s what makes it worse. soulmates just have this bond, jae. like, imagine being so attached and then watch him being taken away.”

“do you like mark?”

“i don’t know!” but i do know. i don’t like mark. never, no.

// as quietly as i can, i close the door behind me only to catch mark in the kitchen from the corner of my eyes. “hey.” i mumble and stop in the hallway.

“hey.” he answers, closing the fridge door. “do you want something to eat?” it sounds like something my mom would say to me right after school which makes me smile. “what’s so funny?” his smile mimics mine.

“nothing.” my smile widens. “why are you still up?”

he shrugs.

“you’re not jealous about me meeting jaebum, are you?” i tease, remembering his admission from before. but i regret it immediately when i see how his face shrinks at the mention. “i ate just now. i’m good.” as an attempt to save the conversation, i quickly add.

we just stand there for a few moments. like when i’d seen at the convenience store a few hours ago. i can’t fucking read his face. but i know he’s not happy. but i’m not sure if he’s mad.

“right.” he says and presses his lips into a tight smile. “well, i’m gonna sleep now.” walking past me, he stops. “i’m not, by the way. really. me being jealous, was a one off.” mark explains before he disappears into his room and i cringe. god, i’m such an idiot. yeah...he’s mad...i think?

/// “how does this look?” i walk out my room the third time. with my fellow date-night judges, all sitting on the couch; grace, jackson, bambam and mark. jackson’s finally hooked me up for another blind date.

the moment i walk out grace and bambam are howling. “this!this!this!” they’re both yelling but unsynchronized which makes me laugh. “this outfit makes all the other outfits look like its bitch.” grace comments as i turn around for them.

“jackson, c’mon. you know the guy, so tell me.” i stand before him, hands on my hips waiting for

jackson mumbles something but i can’t hear. normally, he’d be excited that i actually cared about the blind dates he’d set me up on. “yeah, this one’s the best.” he finally says, looking up at me.

“forreal?”

“why are you asking him?” bambam whines. “I STYLE PEOPLE FOR A LIVING.” he groans. “honestly, arista! this is perfect. just the right amount of skin. by that i mean, legs for days. and those heels? god, that guy’s gonna drop dead.”

“we won’t wait up.” grace adds with a wink which makes me burst into another fit of laughter. “okay, babe but really, you look amazing.”

“i don’t know. i liked the first one.” mark croaks, clearing his throat. his comment earns him a round of disapproving groans.

“that?” i frown. “that was a joke. i was in sweats.” originally, i’d wanted to annoy jackson which it did. “that’s not even remotely funny.” rolling my eyes, i head back into my room to get a better look into my mirror. okay, so, bam and grace are right. i look good. and i feel good? i’m excited for the date. it’s one of grace’s little black dresses’ which she’s graciously lent me. it hugs me perfectly and whatever tits i do have aren’t spilling out. so it’s a modest dress mostly.

i wave everyone a goodbye as i grab my coat, leaving for the date. still giddy. but as i wait for the elevator at the lobby, my heard turns instinctively and i see mark. “what’s wrong?” are the first words out my mouth when i read his face.

“um, just, good luck.” approaching me instead of keeping a distance, he smiles at me. “will you be back?” the way he asks it so innocently but it almost makes me believe he means something else.

i nod, laughing. “of course, i’ll be back.” my hands are reaching to his but we’re interrupted when the elevator arrives. “hopefully, tomorrow morning.” sticking my tongue out, i close the elevator door.

and yeah, i don’t go home. jackson’s practically set me up with the perfect guy. like perfect. perfect. but why? in the back of my mind, i keep reminding myself that he’s not my soulmate. now we’re completely naked right now, with his hands in my hair and mouth on breasts but all my dumbass could think about his mark somewhere; indicating whether or not he’s my soulmate.

he isn’t.

but henry’s just so nice. and sweet. and really..really..talented…in bed. so i stay the night and he wants me to.

[lubdubsworld]

The Devil’s own.

Jungkook x OC

Mafia Au!

Warnings : Non-Con ! Manipulation, Degradation, Shitty hero with no redeeming Qualities you have been warned. ( i mean he does get better but not much.)

Summary : Just Mob Boss Jungkook doing mob boss things.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

I wasn’t sure how long I stayed there , staring at the ceiling and trying to come to terms with what had just happened. It was revolting. It was nauseating. It made me want to claw my own skin off. I stared at the intricate designs , carved into the ceiling, the panels that reflected life and made the room seem bigger than it was. The scent of jasmine and rosemary clung to the sheets and the drapes in the room, cloyingly sweet and meant to arouse the occupants.

I wondered how I’d got here.

I had memories of satin silk sheets and bright lights. My father had always spoiled me, the best of the best only for his only daughter and I’d indulged in luxury to my heart’s content. More shoes than I could possibly wear in a life time. Every season’s collection, straight into my wardrobe whether I asked for it or not. Diamonds and rubies and emeralds set in platinum and gold , jewelry to match my clothes and even my car if I felt like it.

I shut my eyes in despair. I didn’t miss the luxury as much as I missed the solitude. The option to just not do anything. My father hadn’t cared enough to see what I was upto and everyone knew that I was betrothed to Jungkook.

And that meant no dates or party invites because after the third guy got his arm in a sling after accidentally brushing past me , word kind of spread.  Stay away from Elena Gong or the Jeon kid will break your bones.

I shuddered. It had been an obsession, I thought vacantly.

Jungkook had been obsessed, even back then. I just hadn’t paid much heed to him. Because Jungkook back then had been terrifying but also ridiculously endearing in some way. He had seemed for lack of a better word…..insignificant. I was beautiful and rich, never lacked for attention and he was just one among the dozens. Even if I was betrothed to him, I hadn’t given much thought to him.

And Jungkook had taken my indifference in stride. He’d laughed and played around and I hated to admit it, treated me like a queen. Flowers, chocolates and gifts every other day . He would follow me around like a puppy , and I wondered if perhaps my dismissive attitude towards him back then had been a mistake. Did it push him over the edge?

My heart ached fiercely and when I finally willed myself to move, my body protested.

Every inch of me was sore and aching. My head because of how hard he’d gripped my hair. I sat up on shaky legs, fingers trembling as I pulled my shit up to stare at my body. Bite marks littered my skin, marring the smooth surface and I felt bile in my throat at the memory of his teeth on me.  Finger shaped bruises were beginning to bloom around my thighs and I couldn’t breathe over the agony ripping up my insides.

I glanced down between my thighs, at the sticky mess of his release dripping down into the sheets, staining the sheets a murky pink. I shuddered, disgusted. God, I hated him. Where was my phone? My clothes were still there at the foot of the bed and I noticed the small door on the right wall. Crawling off the bed on shaky legs , I limped carefully to the bathroom.

I took Hoseok’s shirt off dropping it in the corner before turning the showers on.

The water felt like a whip on my skin as I sat on the tiled bathroom floor , a small washcloth gripped tight in my hand as I carefully cleaned myself up. I had no idea what the time was… It must be very early or very late. No matter. I had to get out of here and get to Jisoo. I swallowed, imagining her alone all this time. The doctors had said she would be up in Guilt churned as I quickly grabbed a towel from the closet and wiped myself down.

It took me another ten minutes to finish dressing up and just as I finished slipping into my shoes, the door opened.  I glanced up, catching sight of Hoseok as he leaned against the door. He looked a little haggard, a black silk shirt unbuttoned to his chest and tucked into fitted jeans. I stared at him, watching the way his gaze roved over every inch of exposed skin, looking just a tad bit worried.

“The Hospital called. “ He said gently, “ They’re ready to release you sister. They want to know if you can come pick her up. The baby’s going to have to stay in the NICU for a couple of weeks.”

I groaned. Great. More bills.

“I need a job. “ I said miserably. “ Help me out.” I stared at him beseechingly and Hoseok gave me a look.

“you know the kind of jobs I provide. You’re not built for it. “ He said shortly and I shook my head, impatient.

“that’s not what I meant and you know it. You and your friends pretty much own every club in the city. Get me a job ….” I whispered, moving to stand in front of him and he recoiled.

Just as always, I thought bitterly. Coward.

As much as a coward now as he’d been ten years ago, when he’d pretended that he didn’t have any feelings for me. Pretended that he didn’t give a damn about me.

The throb in my skull grew in intensity.

My throat was dry and I felt my vision swim a bit. I was tired. Exhausted . I hadn’t slept in….how long really? I hadn’t eaten in a day…for sure… And I likely wasn’t going to be eating for a long while, let alone feeding Jisoo if I didn’t get a job right away. I had twelve thousand won to my name and that was it.

“Jungkook-“ He began but I was sick of his name so I growled.

“Fuck, do you want me to beg Hoseok? I will… I can’t … I need a job… Please.” I said desperately, staring at him and his gaze softened.

“Elena, stop looking at me like that, fuck.” He swore, turning and punching the wall hard. “ fuck.”

“Just help me get a job. I’m not asking you to give me money or something.  You don’t even have to get it for me… Just tell me who’s hiring ? Somewhere away from Jungkook and his men.” I whispered , and the sheer irony of it didn’t escape me. Jung Hoseok was possibly one of Jungkook’s main men.

He ran his hand over his forehead, shaking his head.

“You’re going to get me killed someday.” He muttered, “ Fine. There’s a club down in Itaewon. It caters to cops and lawyers exclusively so Jungkook and his men usually keep out of it. My friend owns the place. His name is Im Jaebum.  I’ll get you a job there , waitressing. Is that alright?” He said softly and I wanted to sob in relief as I nodded. Itaewon meant pretty close to where the bakery was. I could take the bus.

“Fine. I’ll talk to him and call you. Here…” He held out a wad of cash and I took it greedily, eyes widening at the 100,000 written on the margin of each note. This was a lot of money.

“Hoseok…”I said stunned and he shrugged. “ Get food and baby stuff for Jisoo. If she’s going to feed the baby she needs to eat well. Fruits and veggies and lot of protein. If you run out, tell Jaebum you need some advance. He’ll pay you well.”

I nodded, stuffing the money into my pockets quickly . I swallowed when my insides throbbed, aching something fierce.

“Thank you.” I said softly, staring up at him and he hesitated, before reaching out and gently cupping my face in his palm. I flinched at his touch and he recoiled.

“Was he… Did he hurt you?” He whispered quietly and I smiled bitterly.

“Wasn’t that the whole point?” I sighed, shaking my head . I hesitated . I wasn’t sure if Hoseok would listen to me but I had to try at least.

“ Can you not tell him? That… That I was a virgin?” I asked quietly and he nodded.

“Wasn’t planning to.” He said casually.

I stared at him. I’d always found him handsome. Beautiful. Perfect . And I wondered where we had gone so wrong.

“Do you regret it.” I whispered. “ All those choices you made.”

“Which ones? …” he asked bitterly.

“you know… “ I snapped. “ the ones that lead us here. You and me…. Standing here like strangers. “

“I wouldn’t risk my life for a stranger. Which is what I’m doing every time I help you .” He said quietly.

“So what are we then?” I demanded.

“Old friends” He said casually.

I snorted.

“Fucking coward.” I whispered , loud enough for him to hear as I brushed past him and walked away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I trudged all the way to the VIP room in the hospital flinching because that was probably a lot of money to be repaid , now owed directly to the devil spawn that was Jeon. I had grabbed a small meal on the way before quickly getting the bus to the Hospital. It was little past eleven in the morning and the hallways were packed with people. Sighing, I moved to the room where Jisoo was, slowly opening the door.

Min Yoongi sat on the chair next to the bed, gazing idly at my sister in law.

To say that I was shocked would be the biggest understatement of the century. My lips parted in shock, panic bubbling up inside me as I exhaled sharply.

“What-“ I swallowed gazing between him and my Jisoo, who was sitting up against the backrest on the bed, a tray of food on her lap and a small smile on her face.

“Lena!! You’re here!” She cried out softly, tears filling her eyes at once as she held both her hands up. I moved to hug her but my mind stayed on the man near the bed, his sultry feline eyes trained unblinkingly on her. I wrapped my arms around her, trying to get my breathing to regulate but it was impossible.

What on earth was Yoongi doing here?

“Mr. Min came to see me. He told me he knew Daehwan.” Jisoo said softly, looking sad but hopeful and I felt my heart turn over as I turned to stare at him.

Min Yoongi knew Daehwan as a target . A hit he had carried out himself.

But I couldn’t say a thing. Not in front of Jisoo.

“I’m only here to offer my help. It pains me to see you suffering, Jisoo. I know your husband would want you to be taken care of.” He said softly, his gaze still fixed on her and I didn’t like it. At all.

Bile rising, I gave him a glare.

“I’ll take care of her. Please don’t trouble yourself.” I said shakily and he glanced at me, lips parting a bit, turning into a smirk.

“You look… well rested.” He smirked and I flushed.

“Lena, come on… I know all this…this must be expensive. We can use all the help we can get and Mr. Min-“

“Please call me Yoongi, sweetheart.” Yoongi said charmingly and my sister in law blushed. I felt my skin crawl.

“Y-Yoongi said he has a spare room. I can’t stay in the bakery.  And it’s not like he’s a murderer or anything. He showed me his card. He’s a lawyer.” She said softly and I sighed in despair. Jisoo was naïve bordering on stupid and I wasn’t equipped to deal with this.

As I watched she went back to the food, eating ravenously and I felt my heart clench. I could see the twin damp spots at her chest and I noticed the breast pump on the table. It looked brand new. I hadn’t even thought about things she may need after the baby, too preoccupied with all the hospital bills and medicines I would have to pay for.

Diapers. Baby wipes. Those little flannel pieces mothers used to wipe down the baby. I felt my head spin, turning to Yoongi who was staring at me casually.

“Can we talk?” I said quietly and he straightened.

“Jisoo ssi… Please enjoy your meal. And here…” He gave her his phone. “ If you’re done, just give me a buzz on this.” He showed her something on the phone .” Go on try it.”

Jisoo pressed down on the screen curiously and Yoongi’s watch rang .

He grinned as she smiled.

“See? One touch and I’ll be here yeah?” He said softly, and I felt like I was stuck in some kind of drama, glancing between the pair of them.

“Are you leaving?” She asked curiously and he shook his head.

“I’ll be right here, outside. Having a word with Elena. You can finish your food and I’m guessing it’s time for you to pump again? The pediatrician said you’d have to pump every two hours with the milk so… if you get it ready, I’ll drop it off at the NICU.” He said calmly.

Jisoo nodded, staring at him with wide eyed gratefulness and I sighed in despair.

Yoongi moved to the door and I gave her a small smile before following him.

I waited till the door had closed behind me before turning to him, furious.

“What do you think you’re-“

“I want her.” He said shortly.

I felt my jaw come unhinged.

“No.” I hissed, furious and helpless with rage. “ Yoongi-“

“Don’t make me put a bullet in your head for this, Elena.” He said calmly and I exhaled shakily.

“She’s… You know she’s not like us. She doesn’t know anything about this life. As far as she knows my brother was a surgeon who got killed in a hit and run. You want to …. What do you really want? Did Jungkook put you upto this?”

“If Jungkook would have his way, your sister in law and your new nephew would both be dead. You know this.” Yoongi said casually. God, could I ever have a conversation with anyone without Jungkook being dragged into it? When did my life get twined so intimately with him?

“Where is he?” I asked quickly and Yoongi shrugged.

“He’s out of the country. He left an hour ago.”

“Switzerland….” I said before thinking and Yoongi stiffened.

“How did you know?” He demanded and I froze.

“I… I overheard …..someone.” I muttered and Yoongi moved so fast I barely caught it. The next second I was pressed up against the wall, his forearm pressing into my throat and holding me down while he held a knife right against my jugular.

“Nice try. Now the truth.” He hissed.

“Ouch..” I choked out , coughing  a bit. “ Fine.. Hoseok.. Hoseok told me.”

Yoongi pulled back.

“You fukcing him?” He asked casually and I glared at him.

“none of your business.” I snapped.

He laughed at that.

“I know you aren’t. Hoseok loves his dick too much to risk having it castrated.”

I sighed, shaking my head. I wasn’t here to talk about these bastards.

“Just leave Jisoo alone.” I said quietly and Yoongi sighed.

“What are you going to do with her, Elena. You can barely afford to feed yourself. You should be thankful I’m taking her off your hands.”

I ignored his nonsense and moved till I was pressed up against him, fingers curling into his chest. Yoongi looked surprised, lips twisting in displeasure when I blinked up at him.

“please.. Yoongi…” I begged, “ Don’t do this to me.” I said quietly. “ I … she’s all I have… She… My brother had nothing to do with any of this. You know that….He left this life decades ago. I don’t… I don’t know why Jungkook wanted him dead in the first place. I loved my brother and my brother loved his wife. I owe it to him … Please…just…Please leave her alone.” I whispered softly, letting my fingers drop to grip his arm.  

He tugged his arm away at once.

“ She needs more than empty platitudes and good intentions. She needs food and a place to stay with her baby. I’m giving her that.”

“And what do you get in return?” I demanded angrily. “ She just gave birth, fuck you. You can’t touch her , not unless you’ve lost the last shreds of humanity in that conscience of yours.”

He rolled his eyes.

“I’m not doing this for sex, Elena. If I wanted easy pussy, I would have come to you…” He smirked.  “ Don’t forget that Jungkook and I share our toys, yeah?”

I opened my mouth to retort before remembering that I was trying to get him to listen to him.

“Then why? What do you want…tell me?”

“I told you. I want her. As she is.” Yoongi shrugged.

“You killed her husband.” I said , voice shaking as I remembered what Jungkook had said. About my brother begging for his life because Jisoo was pregnant. And how Yoongi hadn’t given a shit and shot him anyway.

“A minor inconvenience. Trust me if I’d seen her before I killed him…” He sighed, shaking his head in regret and I frowned.

“You would have spared him? “ I asked bitterly and Yoongi laughed.

“No.. I would have killed him sooner.” He smirked. “ Is there a point to this whole conversation… I’m getting bored and Jisoo’s waiting inside.”

“We’re supposed to get her out of the hospital today and-“

“I’m taking her home.” He said briskly. “ I’ve already spoken to her. And She’s agreed that a ramshackle , dilapidated bakery isn’t the right place for a new mother and a tiny baby.”

And the worst part was that I couldn’t even disagree.

And I couldn’t help but feel angry, betrayed. Jisoo was…. How could she? She hadn’t even bothered to talk to me about it… Just agreeing to move in with Yoongi. She was older than me. Supposed to be the smart one. My body ached. If that was the bed she was going to make , she could lie on it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Going somewhere?” Jungkook’s voice made me freeze.

I swallowed, straightening and stepping back almost instinctively. He stood in the doorway, a cigarette held between his teeth as he stared at me . He looked like he’d showered as well, hair still damp and the smells of citrus and mint permeating the air around him.

It was exactly ten days since I’d last seen him and I’d settled into a routine of sorts. Im Jaebum’s bar, Venom was an exclusive club in Itaewon and I could easily disappear into the shadows, staying low and using the beret ( a part of the uniform ) to keep my face hidden as I served the patrons. Like Hoseok had said, the place was filled with cops and lawyers. Yoongi was a frequent fixture here , stopping for just a drink on most days before heading home to my sister in law.

It made me sick but there was nothing I could do about it. Jisoo and little baby Yunsu were both home and needed a l,ot of care. And Yoongi apparently had a cook, a housekeeper and a nanny who helped her out. Jisoo was wary, her senses finally returning but she was also clearly glad to be out of the streets.

“I’m going home after I finish my shift. “ I said softly, trying not to stare as he stepped into the room. I turned away from him moving to the shelves and pushing the small canister in place.

“Where’s home?” He asked casually. I flinched when he stepped right behind me, fingers reaching out to curl on my shoulder, pulling me back till I was flush against his chest. The heat of his body seeped in through the thin fabric of my blouse and I felt my body heat up.

“You got what you wanted.” I said shakily. “ Let me go.” I whispered, dropping the cleaning cloth in the tray on the lower shelves, before moving to grab the mop. I just had to finish mopping the floor . And then I could leave.

But his grip on me stayed firm. I couldn’t move. Foreboding rose inside me.

Jungkook hummed at that, stepping closer, till I felt his chin brush the top of my head as he bent over me, arms coming around me  and fingers lightly unbuttoning the first two buttons of my  shirt. I stared at the dark ink on his forearm. , swallowing as he kept coming closer.

“What I wanted? That pathetic little display ten days ago?”  He whispered softly “ Just think about this Elena ……  I’ve been chasing you for years, I got rid of your entire family and yet I let you live. Why do you think that was, huh? “ He shook his head, “ For two minutes of you lying underneath me like a frigid bitch? You think that’s what I want Elena? Think I’ll be satisfied with that? ” He laughed.

I stared at the wall in front of me  and I couldn’t do this. Couldn’t play this sick game with him. Not when he kept changing the rules . Not when there was nothing left for me to gamble or lose.

“Jisoo. I have to go see her. Just… Just let me go see her. I need to see if she’s alright and then we can talk. ” I whispered. Jungkook smiled, tilting my  head to the side with his fingers. I felt the damp press of his lips against my jaw and my skin crawled.

“Don’t worry, Yoongi’s taking care of her.” He whispered softly and I felt my heart turn over in my chest at the reminder. I’d been forced to relent because Yoongi had taken her home to a fully finished and decorated nursery , a closet full of baby clothes for her son and nursing clothes for her. She had been bowled over and when I’d told her to think about the why of it…she’d given me a helpless sort of smile. . As far as she was concerned , Yoongi had been nothing but generous and kind… And she wasn’t going to say no to him because she couldn’t afford to..

“I… he promised me he’d let me see her. And the baby…every day. That was the deal.”

Jungkook laughed.

“I thought I made this clear . You don’t get to make deals with anyone because you belong to me. I get to decide what happens to you. Anytime. Anywhere. Do you need another demonstration , Elena?” His hand moved to my breast, groping the flesh, fingers rough and hard and I whimpered in pain.

“No..” I choked out , eyes widening in terror and he made quick work of the rest of the buttons on my blouse. Junkook hummed, kissing the back of my neck and slowly turning me around in his arms.

“Relax. You don’t have a job. How are you going to feed her and the kid? Yoongi isn’t like me. He doesn’t hold a lot of grudges. And for some reason he seems to have a hard on for your sister in law. He wants to marry her. ” He chuckled and I felt nausea bloom.

“No.. Don’t… Don’t do that to her. She’s not like us. She doesn’t know… She doesn’t have anything to do with this life.” I begged, heart racing at the thought of Jisoo, helpless and scared and alone with a baby , trapped with a fucking assassin. Yoongi killed for a living . That was his job. Jisoo was delicate and sensitive.

“She still needs to eat and live right? With what?  He’s feeling particularly generous so he’s taken her home . You don’t have to worry about them anymore… Isn’t that nice?” he smirked and I felt my throat go dry.

I clenched my fists, feeling my breath catch.

“The only person you need to worry about yourself is yourself. Isn’t that how you prefer it anyway? Beautiful selfish Elena who never gave a fuck about anyone but herself. Isn’t that who you truly are, angel?” He smiled.

“Not anyone…. Just you… I don’t give a fuck about you.” I said defiantly, staring right up at him.  

Jungkook stared at me and stepped closer, reaching out and running his fingers up and down my cheek. I flinched because he still held the lit cigarette.

“None at all?”  He asked curiously, lightly tapping on the end of the cigarette, and I flinched when the hot ash spilled onto my shoulder.

“Did that hurt, baby?” He whispered, leaning in and pressing the cigarette to my lips.” I’m sorry. Breathe in for me.” He stuck the cigarette into my mouth and I pulled away , coughing and disgusted.

I closed my eyes as his free hand went to my wrist, tugging me closer. I stiffened as he wrapped his arms around me, drawing me in till my face pressed against his chest, his body flush against mine, one hand moving back to stroke my back.

“I missed you. You’re terrible at pleasing me but I think…with a little bit of training, you can make me cum… ” He smirked. “ Let’s start with a blowjob, yeah?”

I stiffened.

“No.” I said softly and he smirked, pulling back.

“No?” He asked softly. . I felt my throat go dry in fear as I noticed the way his gaze shifted.   I bit my lips to stifle the pain as He carefully pressed the lit end of the cigarette right against the curve of my breast , pressing in for a couple of seconds and pulling away just before the skin began to singe. He glanced up at me, and I blinked through the tears, pain spreading all over my chest at the burn. That would leave a scar, I thought miserably.

“Wrong answer. Try again.” He whispered.

“Go to Hell.” I choked out.

I flinched when his fingers slipped up into my hair, gripping hard. My scalp burned, sharp and insistent and instinct made me grip his wrist, trying to get him off but it was impossible.

“Let me go..” I snapped, glaring at him. God, How I hated him.

“Was I your first??” He whispered, dragging me close enough that his lips brushed my ear. “ Never had a cock before? Was that why you were so fucking tight?”

I bit my lips, glaring at him, defiant and furious. Did Hoseok actually tell him? That two faced snake…. God , why did these fuckers never leave me alone?

“Seokjin hyung told me…Told me he was looking forward to breaking a virgin and that made me think….God, I was the first cock she ever had….” He hummed, looking infinitely pleased.

“Yes. And I got to say… I don’t know what the fuss is about. You couldn’t even make me cum.” I snapped and Jungkook grinned, grip tightening and the other hand moving to curl around my waist, squeezing hard.

“Did I make you bleed from between your legs Elena? Tell me I did….Cause that’s fucking hot. ” He whispered, voice low and gruff.

Jungkook, I thought vacantly, was a psychopath.

“Go to Lisa. Go fuck her and make her bleed if that’s what gets you off….  and leave me alone.” I whispered and he smiled, bending down pressing a kiss right where he’d burned my skin.

“I don’t need you to tell me that. She’s my fiancé. The woman I’m going to marry. And you know what that means? I actually give a shit whether she cums or not. And trust me she does. Multiple times. Sometimes so hard she passes out.”

“Or maybe she fakes it. Maybe she passes out because she can’t stand your touch either.” I shrugged. “ Because we all know that’s what she’s good at Jungkook. She faked her friendship with me , she’ll fake her loyalty to you.”

“Always got something smart to say, huh Elena? Let’s see how mouthy you get when I’m shoving my cock down your throat.”

I flinched when he pushed me, hard enough to send me sprawling on the floor. I caught myself with difficulty , throwing my hands out to keep my head from hitting the floor. I flinched at the pain that shot up my body, every inch throbbing because of how rough this fucker had been with me.

Ten days and the aftermath of that night still lingered on me.

And it was three in the morning  and I’d spent eight hours on my feet bussing tables , I was exhausted.

I closed my eyes, before pressing my palm against the floor, trying to pull myself up when I felt the press of his shoe at the base of my spine, pushing me down.

I whimpered in shock, my hands giving out and shoulder crashing down into the floor.

“Stay down for a second, baby.” He whispered and I exhaled.

I pressed my palm against the floor, head dropping on to the carpeted floor . I whimpered when I felt him crouch down, foot digging in harder into my back and I curled my fingers into the carpet to swallow the pained sound that bubbled up in my throat.

“I’m going to fuck you again. And this time I want you to do all the work.” Jungkook’s voice came from over me and I flinched. I considered the odds of me putting up a fight and actually winning. It was laughable. I wasn’t going to fight a force of nature. And that was what Jeon Jungkook was.

“ You can’t make me do anything Jungkook.” I whispered finally. “ You can hit me and rape me and kill me but you can’t make me do anything to you. You just have to live with that.”

His foot lifted off my spine and I felt hands on my arms, pulling me up till I was kneeling. I watched as he moved around to stand in front of me.

“Look at me.” He said carefully.” From now you only speak when I tell you to.”

“ Whatever.  Let’s get this over with so I can go see my sister and my nephew.“ I said shakily.

He sighed deeply at that, shaking his head.

“See, if it was upto me, I’d just put a bullet in both their heads. Cos at this point they’re just proving to be a nuisance.”

My blood turned to ice in my veins.

“ But,  Yoongi’s just getting to know your pretty little Jisoo…And he’s my favorite hyung. So I’m going to let her live. But, let’s not invade their privacy for a while.” He began unbuckling his belt and I felt nausea rise inside me.

“Jungkook?” The voice came from the door and I stiffened.  Jungkook groaned.

“Baby, what the fuck are you doing here?” He said gruffly, standing up and using his knee to push me out of the way roughly. I swore, gripping the edge of the table near me to steady myself before turning around to stare at the woman at the door.  I stumbled to my feet, still feeling a little out of it. I needed food. Before I collapsed in a heap on the floor.

“You were supposed to come see me tonight. I went looking for you everywhere and I find you here about to get with some common whore?”  she shouted and I stiffened, glaring at her.

She stood framed in the doorway, staring at me for a second before letting her gaze wander all over the room. She stared at me, eyes taking in the unbuttoned blouse and I quickly moved to put the buttons back on.

“Did you fuck her?” She demanded angrily and Jungkook hummed.

“Since when did I owe you answers, angel?” He asked casually and I watched the woman’s eyes widen, before her brows furrowed in a frown.

“ So what, I can’t ask you who you’re with ?” She asked angrily and Jungkook groaned , kicking out at the nearest stand with enough force to send it toppling over the side, crashing to floor and breaking on impact. I stumbled, back, wrapping my arms around myself as he fairly growled.

“What the fuck is up with all you cunts today?” He demanded, glancing at me in distaste. “ I come back after busting my ass at work for ten entire days . I just needed to get my dick sucked and you two.” He shook his head, hand reaching into his jacket and I felt my eyes widen when he pulled his glock out, releasing the safety and loading the gun before pressing the muzzle right against her skull.

The woman whimpered, hands held up as he tapped the firearm against her.

“You. You don’t come anywhere near me unless I send for you. Is that clear?” He asked sharply and she nodded frantically, abject terror written all over her face.

He turned to me.

“And you. You’re coming with me.” He said quietly and I felt my eyes widen. I opened my mouth to protest but the girl at the door beat me to it.

“I think not…. You’re not taking her anywhere, Jungkook, I’ll-“ She began, reaching forward to grab him and Jungkook moved so quickly, I could barely blink.

The shot rang out , making me jump and I watched as she crumbled to the floor, crying out in pain. I stared in horror, watching the hole in her arm, spilling blood all over the floor and the hallway and my throat went completely dry,  staring at the girl on the floor and the blank, absolutely merciless look on his face.

“Just because I let you sit on my cock once in a while, doesn’t mean you get a say in how I live my life.” He said quietly, using his foot to prod her hip. He glanced at me and I felt my throat go dry as he pulled the glock back to reload it.

He aimed the gun right at me, eyes dark and heavy.

“Are you going to be good for me, baby? Or do you need a physical demonstration as well?” He tilted his head to where the girl was on the floor, pressing her palm against her arm.

“She’s  bleeding out.. “ I choked out. “ you need to get her help, Jungk-“

Another shot rang out and I jumped, heart in my throat as I tried to understand what had happened. It took me a second to realize that he hadn’t shot me. That he had fired at the ceiling.

“Answer the bloody question Elena.” He growled and I flinched, nodding.

“I… I’ll listen… Just…” I glanced back at the poor girl on the floor.” Get her some help.”

Jungkook smiled a little. He turned to the girl on the floor and shook his head.

“Get up baby. Go find Hoseok and get that patched up, yeah? And don’t provoke me the next time, yeah? ” He said casually and she stumbled to her feet, looking disoriented and scared as she moved out of the door.

“ And you. “ He glared at me. “Finish dressing up and follow me.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Where are we going?” I asked nervously, fighting the instinct to just take off at a sprint, as we walked down the road to where his Mercedes was parked.

“My home. Where else?” He said casually and I stiffened.

“Jungkook-“

“Didn’t I tell you not to speak unless I ask you to, Elena? I’m jet lagged and angry. Trust me , you don’t want to piss me off now.” He said casually and I swallowed.

He opened the door for me, the polite gesture so at odds with what he was doing that my head began to throb.

But I climbed in nonetheless. I stayed quiet for the short ride to his apartment , eyes fixed straight ahead and Jungkook was quiet too. I was too exhausted to be scared, I thought despondently, my eyes drooping because of how long I’d been up. Glancing out the window, I watched the cars whizz by, people living their lives, completely unaware that almost all of them were merely tiny little gears in a machine run exclusively by men like Jungkook. That all their lives, spent working and earning and dying…it was all meaningless. They had no say in anything. People like Jungkook were the ones who got to shape the world to their liking. The ones who got to play God.

And Jungkook was definitely the closest to an omnipotent human I’d ever come across.

Powerful, untouchable and terrifying.

So perhaps, it was a little flattering, that I was the one thing he couldn’t get out of his head.

I glanced at him discreetly.

He was beautiful, I thought with a pang. One of the most beautiful men on this planet. Despite the years, his boyish charm was still right there on his face and he could slip on a plaid shirt , a white t shirt and stone wash jeans and pass off as an innocent college student. I stared at the taut jaw, the long column of his neck and the broad back. His biceps bulged when he gripped the steering when and my eyes lingered on the long fingers curled around the wheel.

I jumped when his hand moved to grip the stick shift , curling on the knob and yanking it back with force. I swallowed, thighs pressing together as my mind shifted to that night in Hoseok’s club. I hated myself for how often I relived it. And not always with disgust.

My fingers fell on the ring on his finger. His engagement ring, I thought with a pang. Lisa. Beautiful, wonderful Lisa who had been a dear friend . Once. For all her shortcomings I knew she loved the man who sat next to me. Cared deeply for him, even. Why else would she do this to me? She must have strong feelings for him , if  it had prompted her to throw away our friendship of over a decade.

“You’re cheating on her then.” I said quietly.  His reminder to not talk to him rang in my head but I couldn’t stop myself. He wasn’t a stranger. And that ring…the ring that promised to bind two people forever….. I’d worn it too. For him.

Jungkook didn’t reply, merely glancing at me in passing.

I sighed, looking at my knees, feeling my shoulders tremble a bit.

“Is she going to be there?” I asked quietly.

He exhaled sharply. I noticed the way his grip on the steering wheel tightened.

“No.”  He said shortly.

“She lives with you right? You said we’re going home ….then where is she-“

“What is this, twenty fucking questions?” He snapped and I swallowed. “ I’m not taking you home to my fiancée Elena, do I look like a fucking idiot? “ He shook his head.

Before I could demand more answers, he was pulling over into a side alley. I watched as he carefully parked the car before stepping out.  Second later, he was coming around and opening the door.

I stared at him, gripping the hem of my blouse, tight. My stomach twisted into knots.

“Can’t you just let me go?” I whispered softly, pride forgotten in the wake of my tiredness. Jungkook stared at me, face eerily blank.

“Get out of the car.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Like it?” He asked softly and I stood on the threshold, taking in the lavishly decorated apartment on the top floor of the building. I noticed the portrait right up front, a large full sized photo of me and Jungkook from nearly a decade ago, wrapped around each other in a hug , showing off our engagement bands.

“What is this?”

“It was supposed to be your wedding gift. From me. I bought it for you. Nine years ago. Thought you should see it.” He said quietly.

I stayed perfectly still , as he wrapped his hands around me in a hug.

“Why did you leave me, Elena?” He asked quietly and I felt my throat go dry.

“Why do you still have this place? Get rid of it.” I snapped. He laughed at that , pulling away and turning me around till I stared at him.

“ Will you stay here, with me?” He asked softly and I froze.

“You’re out of your mind.” I said shortly.

He hummed.

“Possibly. But then, the problem is this. If I tell you , you can’t leave this place ever again….There’s not much you can do about it, right?” He said thoughtfully and I felt a sob building in my chest.

“I… Don’t.” I said shakily.

“You should see the bedroom. Come.”

His fingers wrapped around my wrist dragging me past the lavish couch and sofa, past a well kept bar onto a wide hallway dimly lit. He stopped at the second door on the right, reaching out to open the lock.  The room was plunged in darkness and I hesitated.

“Go on… After you, Mrs. Jeon.” He said softly . I could feel distaste creeping up my spine at the name, shivering a bit as I stepped into the darkness.

“Can you imagine, if we’d gotten married. This is what our first night together would be like…” He pressed against my back, arms coming around me , so gentle that I shivered.

“Jungkook…what are you doing?” I asked shakily.

“Shush…. “ He whispered, moving to unbutton my blouse again. I grabbed his wrists quickly.

“We aren’t married. I’m not your wife.” I said sharply and I felt him go still behind me.

“Shut your mouth and play along like a good girl.” He said quietly. He shook my hands off, moving to undo the buttons again.

Not sure what he expected, I stayed perfectly still as he hummed, pressing soft feather light kisses down my jaw and past my shoulders. His hands stroked up and down my arm as he laughed .

“Did you miss me Elena…..all these years…” He said quietly. “ Because I missed you. So much.”

He hugged me close, tight and hard.

“Are you scared?” He whispered, “ honey?”

“Oh, God…” I choked out, nausea rising up in my throat at the endearment.

“My wife…” He whispered, pressing a few more kisses against my skin before pushing me a bit towards the bed. “ Should I turn on the lights? I wanna see you.”

He nudged me towards the bed and my legs gave out when I hit the edge of it, legs turning to jelly as I sat on it, shaky and creeped out and terrified. Jungkook moved to turn on the lamp on the bedside table, a soft golden glow lighting up the bed .

“Look at you… so beautiful.” He whispered and I watched as he tugged off his shirt, before moving to his belt. He was watching me like I was something precious. Like I was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

“What are you doing?” I asked quietly and he smiled, running his fingers over the tattoos decorating his chest. He stopped at a large ornate tiger lily, inscribed right over his heart.

“Do you like it?” he said softly. “ I got this for you. My Elena…. As delicate as a lily and as brave as a tiger.”

I stared at him in disbelief.

“Either fuck me or let me go, I’m not here to talk about-“

He slapped me, so hard that my head whipped to the side, my face feeling like it had caught fire. I gasped, the pain spreading all over my jaw and I couldn’t quite grasp what had just happened. I pressed shaky fingers to the throbbing skin near my mouth, eyes watering at the sting.

“Didn’t I tell you to play along, angel?” He whispered sharply and I closed my eyes , shuddering.

Play along. Do it if you want to get out of here alive. ‘

Fucking psychopath.

“ It’s beautiful, Jungkook.” I whispered softly, glancing at him with teary eyes. He nodded.

“We’ll get one for you too. A wolf. With the initials JK on it…. Right here…” He lightly traced a path over my collarbone and I hoped to God, this was some sick fantasy. That he wasn’t seriously considering tattooing his initials on me.

“Strip for me baby… All of it. I want to see you.” He whispered and I hesitated just long enough to take a deep breath. I reached back, quickly undoing my bra clasp and pulling the fabric off.  I hooked my thumbs into my skirt and my panties, tugging both of them off me, swiftly. I dropped all of it on the floor next to the bed, before moving to kneel in the middle of the bed, staring at him with a smile that felt physically painful.

“I’m going to make you feel good, baby.” He whispered quietly, crawling over on top of me.

“Lay down for me.” He said, and I felt repulsed, as he kissed my lips, soft and gentle, pressing in till I was flat on my back, legs parted so he could lie in between.

It was so different from last time and somehow ten times worse.

Jungkook pressed kisses all over my face, whispering gentle words against my skin that felt like acid.

“So beautiful…. Mine. You were always mine Elena. Mine to touch and mine to break . Mine to love and mine to fuck.”

I stared as he loomed over, his face inches from mine, his gaze deceptively affectionate, his eyes warm and almost soft. I watched as he came closer, his lips closing over mine. Instinctively I kept my lips together but his fingers curled around my thigh, squeezing hard enough to make me whimper, lips parting . He pressed his tongue in then , licking into my mouth and I brought my hands up, instinctively wrapping around the bare skin of his shoulders and my body thrummed at the feeling of his muscles under my fingers.

Curiosity made me foolish, and I found myself tracing the hills and valleys of his skin, fascinated by the way the muscles flexed, every time he moved his arm.

“You like that? I worked hard on those…” He chuckled, watching me curl my fingers around his biceps. He was so… big. I moved my fingers up to the hardness of his chest, splaying my palm on his pecs and my fingers caught a hard little scar, almost perfectly round and deep.

“What is this…” I asked , curious my finger dipping into the healed skin and he hummed.

“Your father . He shot me when I was chasing his car down in Jeju Do. Foolish bastard. Thought he could outrun me.” He laughed .

I glanced at him, catching his eyes and the ebbing laughter , my heart twisting.

“Then why am I here? You hate my father. You killed my entire family. So why am I here, Jungkook?”  I asked foolishly, my heart breaking a bit and he hesitated.

“Because you’re mine.” He said simply.

I closed my eyes in despair.

“If this was our wedding night…. What would you say…?” He asked suddenly.

I stared at him, confused.

“What?”

“If we got married back then… When you were eighteen. And it was our first night together….. what would you say?”

I sighed.

“I’d ask you to ….to be gentle.” I whispered.

He nodded.

“Tell me , then.”

I stared at him, feeling helpless.

“Go on, Elena.” He said again.

“Jungkook…” I began but he shook his head.

“Ggukkie.” He said softly. “ Call me GGukkie… That’s what you used to call me …when we were young.”

I clenched my fists, on his chest, resisting the urge to push him off. That wouldn’t end well for me.

“GGukkie…” I whispered, finally, glancing up at him, licking my lips and parting them gently, eyes as wide as they could go, “ you know its my first time right?”

Jungkook’s eyes fairly danced at that and he hummed, leaning closer.

“Is it, baby?” He asked, reaching up to brush my hair away, fingers gentle on my face.

Get into it. Get into it and get it over with.

“You know it is…” I pouted, “ No one else can touch me. I’m yours , aren’t I GGukkie…”

He laughed, rubbing his nose against mine.

“That you are, kitten.”

Kitten? That’s a new one.

Shut up and stay in character , fuck.

I was so fucking screwed.

“ So… will you be gentle?” I whispered , “ I don’t want it to hurt.”

Jungkook wrapped his arms around me rolling over and taking me with him till I was lying flat on top of him.

“Then how about this angel? You can ride me…. As slow and gentle as you like. Make yourself feel good on my cock, yeah….?”

I stared at him.

I’m gonna fuck you and you’re going to do all the work.

He’d played me like a fiddle.

“Well baby? Go on…. Take my pants off.”

I exhaled angrily, before moving down, to tug on his pants. He helped me take them off kicking off his boxer briefs as well.

That’s a beautiful dick. Objectively. Very pretty.

Shut the fuck up.

“ Get it wet for me baby….” He said softly. I glanced down at the hard length of it, jutting out of the small thatch of hair and felt my mouth go dry . Which would be counterproductive if I wanted to get it wet. So I swirled my tongue around my mouth, trying to get my mouth moist, before leaning down and carefully wrapping my lips around the head.

Fuck, he tastes good.

I shook my head a bit to clear the voice in my head, glancing up at him with my lips stretched around the soft pink head and he was looking right back at me, eyes heavy and dark .

“Go on baby, take more of it in, use your tongue…make me feel good.”

I closed my eyes, letting the spit coat the hard length of his cock, sinking down till the tip began to inch down my throat. I sucked lightly, running my tongues back and forth on whatever skin I could touch and it was like sucking a lollipop except the lollipop was thick enough to stretch my mouth wide and hit the back of my throat.

I felt his hand reach into my hair, gripping hard and I whimpered.

“Be gentle…” I whispered, pulling off and his eyebrows shot up , clearly in surprise . He stared at me for a second, as though considering my request and then his fingers loosened , threading through the strands soothingly.

“I’m sorry, baby.” He whispered . I went back to sucking him off, somehow my natural tendency to work hard making me bob up and down, using my tongue and taking him as deep as I could. I felt a sick sort of satisfaction when he moaned in pleasure and for some damn reason I wanted to draw more sounds out of him.

This is a dream. Either that or you tripped over a pothole and fell into another dimension.

“ Are you wet ? Come here, so I can check….” Jungkook said softly and I pulled off moving up to straddle his hips. I flinched when he reached down, tracing my slit with carefully fingers before slipping in two. I tightened against the intrusion, still sore on the inside and he pulled his fingers out, bringing them up to my mouth.

“Suck…and get them nice and wet if you don’t want it to hurt.” He said quietly and I wrapped my lips around his fingers, letting my spit coat the slender digits.

When he pushed them back into me, the slide was easier , wetter and I gripped his shoulders, trying to relax around him. It felt foreign but also good… I felt good…

I stared down at him, the broad muscled body and the handsome face and for a crazy moment I imagine what it would have been, if I had married him. Would it have been this….this… weird pleasure that was somehow both painful and exhilarating at the same time. I bit my lips as he curled his fingers inside me, rubbing at some spot high up inside me that sent heat shooting straight up my spine, slick dripping out of me and onto the hard planes of his stomach like honey from a comb.

“Now sit on my cock.” He said quietly. I trembled, reaching down to lightly grip his cock, moving till the head lined up right against my slit or where I thought my slit was. Biting my lips, I lowered my body, feeling my body cleave to let him in, his cock pressing in and in and in.

My knees gave out and I slid down the length of him, the sudden, incredible fullness knocking the breath right out of me.

“ Fuck…baby….you alright?” He whispered and it messed with my head, the way he actually looked concerned and worried and I couldn’t take anymore of it.

“Please… Please… I just… I want to go home…” I whimpered, feeling full and stretched out, my thighs trembling and my insides wet and warm and somehow stuck between wanting more and wanting it to end.

Jungkook grunted, fingers curling over both my hips and lifting me lightly and with ease.

“Come on baby…. Ride me….” He whispered, “ Put your hands on my chest and roll your hips, up and down .”

I did as he said, one hand braced against his chest, the other gripping his shoulder as I tried to move on him but it was hopeless. I had no energy or inclination to do this and the pleasure was fast ebbing into frustration. Jungkook seemed to sense it because he growled.

“Fuck, you’re so fucking bad at this… Fine… Just lay there and let me use that stupid cunt of yours.” He snapped,  gripping my waist and folding his knees just enough to brace his feet on the bed. I gasped as I got lifted a bit , his cock slipping in impossibly deeper , the tip nudging close to my cervix , the lightest brush of it send sharp jolts of electric pain pleasure up my spine.

“Oh fuck,..” I breathed as he pistoned into me, hips hitting my ass with brutal force as he fucked up into me and I could only tremble, eyes fluttering shut, fingers going numb from how hard I was gripping him.

“You’re gonna cum today… I’m gonna make you cum on my cock…” He growled, reaching down and pressing his thumb against my clit, rubbing softly, slow circles that were almost gentle compared to the brutal pounding oh his hips and I felt my mouth go slack, wetness slipping out of my tongue and dripping down my chin because of how excruciatingly good it felt, having him so deep, pressing in against the edge of my womb and I and to press my palm, right up against my belly , stunned because of how my body seemed to open and shift to make room for him.

“I’m gonna cum inside you, right inside your womb, fuck…. Gonna carry my babies for me, right sweetheart? Gonna watch you get round and full with my seed , watch you drip milk all over me with those beautiful tits….fuck…”

The shock of his words sent me over the edge, my body clenching down on him as I came, my orgasm so strong that I felt like I was cramping up on the inside and I toppled forward onto him, landing on his chest and bouncing a bit. Jungkook grunted a little, wrapping both his arms around me, holding close as he fucked me right through the aftershocks, body stilling only when I stopped shuddering and I felt warm wetness spill inside me, so deep that I knew I would have to swallow three morning after pills after this, although I was on birth control.

Because one could never be too sure with these things.

Jungkook stayed still under me and it took me a few seconds to catch my breath. I finally levered myself off of him, legs shaking as I rolled over and onto the bed before breathing in huge lungfuls of air.

“Can I go?” I choked out.

Jungkook grunted. “ Get the fuck out of here.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I stumbled out of the cab, exhausted and out of my mind with self loathing, I didn’t expect to see Hoseok sitting on the pavement outside the bakery, leaning against a streetlight, face warm but determined.

“Hobi?” I asked stunned. “ What are you-“

He cut me off with a kiss.

I stared wide eyed as he pulled me into an embrace, wrapping me in warmth and scent of his cologne, his hands impossibly gentle around me as he all but cradled me against his body, his lips moving gently against mine.

“Elena…” He breathed against my lips, eyes glinting . “ I love you. I’ve been in love with you for years. I’m so fucking sorry for being such a coward but you deserve to know… you deserve to know how I feel about you.”

I stared at him in disbelief, my heart pounding as I punched his chest in desperation.

“No… No fuck you… what are you doing…. He’ll kill you…” I hissed and he tightened his arms around me.

“I don’t care.” He hissed. “ I don’t… I can’t just… I can’t let him hurt you like this. I won’t. I’m going to tell him. I’m going to tell him to let you go or lose our friendship.” He said angrily and I trembled.  

My heart raced because Hoseok was the only one I’d ever loved. In every way a girl could love a boy. He was and had always been this confusing breed of brother and friend while everyone had drooled after Jeon Jungkook , I’d always been drawn to him…drawn to his quiet strength and to the way he had always treated me as an equal…

But… but Jungkook…. Jungkook who would put a bullet in his brain without a thought if he thought that Hoseok was trying to move in on something that belonged to him…..

“Hoseok…just… Don’t. I… I love you too…” I breathed out, tired and scared and so fucking worried because what if someone was listening even now..what if word got to Jungkook and he tried to hurt ….i couldn’t even think it.

“Come find me when Jungkook is busy . When he can’t find us…” I said softly, reaching out and pressing my palm against his face.

“I’m not scared of him.” Hoseok growled  and it was ridiculous.  

“But I’m scared of losing you. “ I said quickly. “ We can’t… He can’t know. Ever.”

Hoseok nodded before pulling me close again.

“Was he too rough?” He whispered and I blinked, flushing. I shook my head.

“No.. I. No. I think…”

“I hate that he was the one to touch you, first. You.. You deserve to know how good it can be…. How gentle.. I want to… fuck…” He shook his head pulling away and I wrapped my arms around myself.

“We can’t…” I said quietly. “ you know we can’t.”

He glanced at me, eyes blazing and lips parted and I groaned.

“Don’t look at me like that Hobi…” I whispered, shaking my head.

“Tomorrow. He’s going to Jeju Do , to inspect a new resort. He won’t be back till the day after. Call in sick at work.” He said quietly and I bit my lips, feeling a bit like a whole idiot.

I nodded.

He reached forward and pressed a kiss to my forehead.

No self preservation skills at all, I thought miserably.  

If Jungkook found out…….

Author’s Note : I’ll add the taglist here tomorrow

[oofjae]

Video imagine 4

Jenn belongs to @justmochi

[multixkpopxrp]

Ok! This feels better. I’ve cleaned up my muse list a little. So feel free to interact with any of these babies. Not sure I’ll be doing threads any time soon, but asks are allowed!

Oc’s:

• Skyler Reynolds (Olivia Holt)

ACE:

• Junhee

ATEEZ:

• Hongjoong

• Seonghwa

• Mingi

• Yunho

• Yeosang

• San

• Wooyoung

BLACKPINK:

• Jisoo

• Rosé

BTS:

• Namjoon

• Seokjin

• Yoongi

• Hoseok

• Jimin

• Taehyung

• Jungkook

EXO:

• Baekhyun

• Kai (Jongin)

GOT7:

• Jaebum

• Jackson

KARD:

• Matthew (BM)

MONSTA X:

• Changkyun

NCT:

• Taeyong

• Johnny

• Mark

• Haechan

• Jeno

• Renjun

SHINEE:

• Taemin

• Minho

STRAYKIDS:

• Bangchan

• Hyunjin

• Jeongin

THE BOYZ:

Sunwoo

WAYV:

• Ten

• Lucas

• Yangyang

[jj-ktae]

Fragrance IV : Leather

Title : Fragrances

Genre : Fluff, Angst, Romance

Pairing : Jaebum x Reader

Summary : You are a perfume composer, he is a lyricist, and while you’re left with too many possibilities, he is out of inspiration. Your only bond is an unknown fragrance.

- Teaser - Vetiver - Chypre - Fougère - Leather - Oud - Neroli - Gourmand - Ambergris -

Fragrance IV : Leather

A strong, smoky scent that stems from ingredients used to tan leathers—it’s usually used in fragrance with the help of synthetic chemicals.

Choi Youngjae’s smile is lunar. It’s illuminating his shy face in a way that makes you grin like an idiot. He is looking at Jaebum like he is a star and you finally understand how loved this guy is.

“I’m working on an album and I would love for us to work together on it.”  Jaebum doesn’t seem to like what he is hearing, and you and Bambam don’t know how to react so you look at each other before slowly moving away from the two. You don’t go that far though because Jaebum grabs your arm to keep you next to him. You see his pleading gaze and Bambam understands right away, moving away without you and you see your tiny glint of hope fade away from the awkward situation.

“I can’t.” Youngjae’s smile fades as soon as Jaebum speaks. He looks disappointed suddenly and you want to pet his hair and comfort his puppy state. “Why not? I know we don’t create the same music but your lyrics are wonderful and my agency needs some change in my artistic orientation.”

Jaebum snorts, his hand still around your forearm like you’re his only ally on earth. You don’t move nor speak, conscious that you can do nothing except being here and support him silently.

“This is why I can’t. I don’t write for the sake of a career. I’m sorry.” He pulls on your arm and you both walk away from a surprised Youngjae. Jaebum’s face is indecipherable. He grabs another glass of champagne on your way to the tiny balcony across the reception room, feet soft yet hurried against the hotel’s marble.

He stops to look outside and it’s like a fresh bowl of hair for him. You stay silent, waiting for him to let go of your arm and puzzled by how different he looks without the entrancing smell of his tortured being. You can’t stand the tension though, and if Jaebum is okay with staying quiet and watching the view like he is nostalgic of lost times, you pull on your arm, like a proof of your existence next to him.

He snaps his head toward you and the fingers around your forearm are gone in an instant. Jaebum is lost, right now.

“Are you okay?” You ask as carefully as you can. From what you know and observed ever since you met him, you can feel he is not okay with the sudden opportunity.

“No. I’m not okay.” His now free hand goes to his forehead before rubbing the skin, expressing his growing frustration. “I’m scared.”

You tilt your head, not surprised. “I can see that.” You wish you could be more of a support, but Jaebum without his smell is not Jaebum. His cologne is a tad too strong and it’s going against his subtle natural accord. You hate it.

“I’m not scared of failing. I’m scared of taking people down with me.” And he chuckles because the thought itself is scary. Ruining another artist’s career would end him for good.

“It could also work out and become a bop.” You lean against the balcony’s bench, eyes scanning the room and you see Bambam chatting with a depressed Youngjae.

Jaebum can’t see it, he is too busy watching the horizon. “I don’t want to create a bop; I want to do something beautiful and valuable.”

“A bop can be beautiful and valuable. Following a trend doesn’t mean being greedy.” You know what he means. Jaebum isn’t mainstream, he runs by his beliefs and what he thinks sounds good, he doesn’t want to be in the charts. It’s the same with perfumes.

“You know about it, luxury perfume maker.” He snorts and it shocks you. Your eyes swiftly go from the room to the side of his face and you suddenly feel offended. Are you being belittled by Im Jaebum, right now? He sighs, looking back at you with eyes that you didn’t know could exist on Jaebum “I’m sorry. I should just go home.”

You shake your head, trying not to think too much about his mean comeback. “Sure. If it makes you feel better.” You know it’s not the best comfort you gave in your life, but Jaebum feels so different you can’t do anything about it. You’re only a passer-by in his problems and you already have your own. There’s so little you can do to help him, except making sure he doesn’t do something stupid.

“Well...” His voice is so low you almost don’t hear him, but you don’t need to ask because he is already walking away along with his strange odour. You watch him enter the room, you see him avoid every eye and looks, you see Youngjae hit Bambam’s shoulder softly and you see your assistant check to look for you.

He comes as soon as he notices your bored face on the balcony. “Boss, I’m sorry, I didn’t to-”

“I know.” You cut him. It’s too late for apologies and too early to talk about this. You don’t want to think about this guy for now. He has issues he can’t deal with, so there is no way you could do it for him. Maybe your mind is turning into a cold bitch, maybe you’re only using this guy for your own benefit.

But then again, he does look like he is doing the same so it’s fine by you.

“Youngjae is kind of sad, now.” He points at his friend who is pouting into the room and you both enter the place again, doing your best to try and defend your roommate who brushed this guy’s hope like dust on a chest of drawers.

You come back home by 4 and find Jaebum writing at the same spot he always is. You smell this bloody perfume in your living-room and you want to throw it out the window but you head to your room instead, ignoring him as much as he is ignoring you.

You fall asleep at 6.

Bambam arrives later with croissants and freshly made orange juice. He is wearing a burgundy suit with golden jewellery and you open your flat’s door still in your pyjamas.

“Week-ends are chill days, got it.” He snaps his fingers with a grin when he enters and hands you the bag. You can smell butter from it, it must be delicious.

“I’m exhausted, let’s just work for a couple of hours.” You explain while going to the kitchen.

Bambam agrees. “Sure. Now that we found the base notes, we can focus on the middle notes.”

At this, you make a face. Thank god Jaebum took a shower before going to bed and erased that damned scent from himself. But now the familiar feeling is back. It’s back from god knows where and aiming for your head again, blurring your consistency and shaking your sanity.

Bambam sips on his drink and speaks again. “I think this perfume is going to be great.” You love his positivism. Bambam is not the type of boy who would let you feel down. He always comes up with great compliments and positivity. If only you could be like him.

You smile at him, nodding. If he says so.

“Youngjae doesn’t want to give up on Im Jaebum.” Bambam continues the talk and now you react. It tickles your interest because it’s much more intense to think about Jaebum when you’re surrounded by his aroma.

“He doesn’t look like he wants to work with him, though.” You explain. Bambam acquiesces.

“Youngjae told me he needs to get in touch with him. I don’t want him to kill me so...do you think you could help us?” To this you lift a questionable brow at your assistant.

“How? It’s not like he will listen to me.” You have no powers over him. He drags you toward him without knowing yet he doesn’t give a damn about your mere existence.

“Do you mind if I give Youngjae your number?”

You open your mouth, in shock “Why is that? I really can’t help. Have you seen how he is, here? Tell your friend not to waste his time and look for another lyricist. There must be people who can write as well as him.” There must be, Jaebum is not the only genius in town.

Bambam shakes his head. “I think you could help us. Please?” His puppy eyes are working way too much for your taste and you don’t like it when you agree, feeling trapped into a plan that is doomed to fail.

Bambam grins so wide you can count his teeth one by one. “Thanks, boss. Youngjae will be so happy.”

“Tell him not to expect too much, honestly.”

You start working 30 minutes later and finish 4 hours later. You both came up with nothing new and you decide not to insist. You knew from the moment you woke up that you would be even more useless today. Bambam grabs his stuff and thank you again for your cooperation. You scratch your head, ready to go back to bed but Jaebum’s body is out, and heading to the bathroom.

You close your eyes, in awe. It’s like a drug you need. It gives power and motivation, but also dissatisfaction.

You decide to go to the kitchen, instead. Knowing Jaebum, he must be in need of food and pretty much very hungry at this hour. You don’t know why you start preparing food for him, and you decide to blame his scent, because it’s the only explanation to your kindness.

He goes out shortly after, sniffing the delicious smell of food and you wonder if it works on him like his own scent works on you.

“Hey,” he says, eyes puffy. His clothes are huge on his body, and it gives him cool vibes. He sits by the table and yawns.

“Want some food?” You ask, your back facing him while you’re already putting stuff into a big plate. You know he is going to say yes. He would never say no to sausages.

“You made some for me?” He is surprised. You hear a sound and the next thing you know, he is right behind you. You close your eyes because his shower gel adds to the spell he put on you.

He sees you nod and smiles. He is happy. “Thanks.”

You walk away, grabbing another glass of orange juice. You can’t talk now, but you still need to help this poor singer who wants to entrust his career to this weird guy.

“Bambam came this morning and he said-”

“I know what you’re about to say, but I won’t work with this guy.” Jaebum stops you before you can even try. How did he know?

He rolls his eyes, already stuffing his mouth and it’s difficult to understand what he says at some point “Bambam knows Choi Youngjae, Bambam is your assistant and we are ‘roommates’, so obviously he is going to ask for your help.”

“What a perceptive man.” You mock him but to your surprise, he laughs. It seems he likes it when you become daring.

“I know, right? I have a sharp nose for these things, no bad pun intended.” He munches like it’s his last meal on earth, not the least annoyed by your poor attempt at making him change his mind.

“You could still work on the song you showed me. I mean, with him.” It sounds simple. Jaebum has a song ready, and Choi Youngjae needs one, so why not work on it?

“It’s not that easy. You can’t offer a song like you give a perfume to someone.” He says and regrets it instantly.

“You should really stop talking about me like I’m doing shit.” You get angry. It’s the second time he talks to you like you’re nothing. Like your job is pointless.

“No, I mean- Shit. Sorry.” It’s surprising to see him apologize but you won’t give in. His smell is awesome, but his behaviour is the total opposite.

“I’m really doing my best. You’re the one who agreed to come to the party, and you’re the one who made me stay with you when you had to deal with this singer. I’m only trying to help.” Your voice is filled with frustration. You’re frustrated because of his behaviour, the way he deals with things and most importantly, the way he acts like life is over every time someone mentions music-making.

“I didn’t ask for your help, if you remember.” His fork is long forgotten on the table, but his voice is steady, too calm for what he is about to say. “You dragged me here instead of letting me deal with things. You’re the one who involved yourself into my business, and I don’t even know why honestly, so don’t complain when I imply that I don’t need you.”

“So why are you still here?” You know what he is about to answer, it’s logical.

“I don’t know, you tell me. If not because of you, I would be long gone, out of this bullshit. But I’m here, trying to write the shitty things I come up with in my mind. If my behaviour is too much for you to handle, I guess I can take myself out.” He reacts fast and gets up, already walking to his room and you know he is about to grab his stuff and leave. Even the tiny wind following his walking body smells like heaven but you don’t stop him. Maybe it’s for the best, maybe this whole situation isn’t meant to continue.

He is gone less than an hour later, and when he closes the door with a soft noise, you want to cry. You don’t miss him, but the smell is slowly going away and it’s ripping your insides because it was giving you fuel to continue, and now you have nothing.

You will never be able to feel this again.

“I’m taking a couple of days off.” You tell Bambam over the phone the next day. It’s a fine morning. The weather is great, you slept well, you’re about to grab lunch but your mind screams for help. You take your keys and hear Bambam ask if you’re okay.

Of course you’re okay. Your flat smells like shit, but you’re totally fine.

“I’m okay, just not feeling well. Tell the boss I’m sick.” You hang up when Bambam tells you to take care of yourself and close the door behind you. What a day to feel like crap.

The day is boring, it means nothing and it is so unlike you to feel so down. You’re not a cheerful person, this you know, but to the point of finding everything tasteless? It never happened. Jaebum won’t leave your mind and you find yourself wondering if he finally did what he wanted to do. You walk slowly whenever you see a bridge. It makes you look anxiously, hoping he didn’t do it.

You spend the rest of the day thinking about what you’re going to do. You can’t possibly create this perfume anymore, not when you have no idea where you’re going. Maybe you should let Bambam do the job and pray for it to work. He is good, he can do it.

You get a call from Choi Youngjae who pleads you to convince Jaebum and you can’t tell him he is long gone god knows where so you assure him you’ll do your best. You hate lying, but somehow you can’t crush him. 

It stays that way for three days. Three days of wandering the streets and sleeping until your eyes get puffy and red. Three days of long grunts and sighs. Three days of trying to persuade yourself that you don’t need him, that he was a mistake that stained your already messy mind. 

You decide Jaebum means nothing, his smell is just an illusion and you don’t need it to live. You’re strong, independent, you need no jerk to function. You convince yourself at some point, ignoring your subconscious who laughs at you for lying to yourself so blatantly.

Bambam comes back when you tell him you can start working again. You’re back on hard-working mode, sniffing bottles after bottles and talking to Bambam like you’re a new person. He is surprised by your sudden motivation, and when he doesn’t hear about Im Jaebum and doesn’t seem him, he prefers not to ask.

He is obnoxious, but not stupid. He knows your leave wasn’t for the sole purpose of healing.

“What do you think about Bergamot?” You try. It’s better than everything you mixed so far, and it’s not the best, but it’s good enough for now.

Bambam approves, opening another tiny bottle. “Oriental Leather.” he smells it and starts coughing violently.

You take it away from his hands before it can fall. It’s too precious to go to waste. “Let me see. Maybe...12 percent?” You used it only once, and it was for a very specific perfume. Back then you didn’t like how it smelled, but maybe it could go well with your current base note.

“Oriental leather is strong, even stronger than musk and maybe, maybe we’re about to make something good.” Your eyes shine when you start working on the proportion, hands as busy as your mind. Bambam watches intently, even taking notes from time to time. He will never get enough of your knowledge; he feels so lucky.

The result is great; you can feel it. Bambam loves it and it’s suddenly jackpot.

But when you’re about to take a much-needed break, a soft knock on your door makes you rush to answer. Apprehension fills you from the deepest it can reach as you open the door, breath long gone. It’s not Jaebum. It’s a stranger. You feel stupid for being so eager to smell him again and you decide to ignore the disappointed feeling into your stomach.

“Are you Y/N?” He is elegant, all suits and hair neat. His eyes are a not so typical shade of dark brown, and they shine so bright it feels like a human doll is standing in all its glory right in front of you.

“Yes...? And you might be?” You ask back. Bambam arrives behind you when he doesn’t hear any sounds coming from the door.

“I’m Park Jinyoung, I’m here to see Jaebum. He told me you’re both roommates, but he hasn’t been answering his phone for the past days so I decided to come.” He gives you a smile which fades when you answer, voice barely above a whisper.

“He moved out three days ago.”

---

You’re panicking. This Jinyoung guy looks angry and you can’t understand how he can stay so calm when Jaebum completely disappeared.

He takes out his phone when it rings. “Yes, father. I had to meet with Jaebum. No, I won’t be late.” He turns to your questioning gaze, “Work.” He smiles before looking around the place, waiting for you to speak.

“So this is where he stayed. It’s a huge flat. Are you rich?” he asks and you can’t believe it.

“No, I’m not. Do you have any idea of where he could be?” You ask. You need to know if he is safe. He can’t be dead, can he? No it’s impossible, he has all the talent in the world, he smells great, it can’t go to waste.

“No. Not at all. Jaebum often disappears and comes back like it’s nothing. I’m sorry for coming without further notice.” He is about to go like nothing dramatic is happening.

“But, you’re not going to look for him?” It’s crazy. You hear thunder outside, and understand it’s starting to rain heavily. You see flashes of Jaebum crying under the rain before jumping off a bridge, or even a roof, or anything that would hurt him.

But Jinyoung laughs, and his eyes go back to playful when they were annoyed a minute ago. “No, I won’t. I told you he often does that. He will come back soon.” Your first thought is to slap him because, come on, his friend is suicidal and he doesn’t move? But you don’t say a word, you don’t move, you don’t even show how worried you are.

Maybe he doesn’t even know Jaebum wants to end his life.

Knowing the guy, he obviously omitted to inform his friend about his dreadful intentions. It’s not a surprise then, to see his friend so relaxed, like Jaebum went on a soothing week-end in the countryside.

The latter walks past you and you get hit by the smell of pepper and musk. It fits his fierce feature. “I’ll be going then. Sorry again for intruding.” He notes how concentrated you are, deep in thoughts like you’re trying to find the answer to a complex puzzle.

You simply nod, and Bambam leads the man to the main-door, not noticing the way Jinyoung looks at him like he just came out of a very tacky movie. Your foot taps the floor restlessly and it’s a miracle you didn’t rush to look for him yet.

He wouldn’t even care anyway.

“Are you okay?” You assistant has warm eyes and your worry reflects upon his face. You try to smile back to keep your façade but inside it’s twisting. Your insides are a mess.

“Yes. Let’s stop here for today okay? It’s starting to rain; you should head back home.” You care about your assistant, you really do, but you can’t talk to him about it. If Jaebum didn’t even mention to his closest friend, then Bambam can’t be included into this. No matter how friendly and concerned he looks, he can’t be dragged into this huge mess you created yourself because of a stupid smell.

A stupid and addictive smell.

“Yes. Right.” Bambam looks away, somewhat hurt that you wouldn’t share what’s on your mind and grabs his jacket from your office’s chair. He comes back and his long fingerS suddenly tap your shoulder.

“It’s going to be okay.” You’re not surprised to hear his words. Bambam is perceptive and way too social not to understand that you and Jaebum are not complete strangers to each other. He doesn’t know about the scent, but he can see that there is something that makes you go to him.

He doesn’t ask and prefers to stay silent. He is here for work, but you’re always so lonely and have no confidence that it makes him want to scream. To him, you’re amazing and he wishes nothing more than have a tiny bit of your talent to exist. He sighs and turns around, legs tightly wrapped into torn jeans and disappears with soft motions. You look outside when a bolt of lightning illuminates the whole living-room and wonder if Jaebum is safe. You hate feeling this way. You’re even more pitiful now.

It’s hard to sleep that night. You blame it on your lack of exercise. Your body isn’t drenched enough to feel tired, so you turn around again and again, legs blocked into pale blue sheets and hair messy, spread on your cushion like a fighting octopus. You stereotypically look at the ceiling from time to time, picturING images of you creating something beautiful mixed with the familiar and dazzling scent of Jaebum. You wish nothing more than for it to stop, but you can’t decide for yourself and your soul leads the way, ordering you to be miserable and in need of his being to be able to be rational again.

You hear noises and blame it on the heavy rain clapping against your windows along with thunder. It’s tapping softly and adding to your anxiety, following your heart rate in an off-putting manner. You ignore it, scolding yourself and aware that you’re not going to be productive when Bambam will arrive next morning.

But the tapping comes back shortly after and you get off your bed. You grab your abandoned robe and wrap it around your exhausted envelope, rolling your eyes at your own paranoia. So what now, someone is going to rob your place? You decide to check the windows because maybe it’s only a matter of wind hitting the glass. You hope it is. You check all the rooms and when you don’t hear it anymore, you rush to bed again. There’S only a little time left before you’re supposed to be up and you can’t waste it on idiocy.

But on your way to your room you jump, hand over your mouth to silence your horrified cry. Your chest is about to explode and you got so scared you’re trembling. You freeze and blink when the shadow you spotted in the tiny lobby doesn’t move, against the wall. Your hand silently reaches for the wall and you turn on the light when you finally get a grasp of the situation. So this is what it is.

Jaebum is on the floor, drenched and looking exhausted.

And you can breathe again.