#jung jaehyun blurbs

[cbeargyu]

marry me, mr. jeong

summary: while everyone around you is getting married, you're left behind—no ring, no lover, just silence waiting at home. but one night, your boss, mr. jeong, makes an unexpected proposal: "marry me." and suddenly, your quiet world begins to burn.

pairing: boss!jaehyun x fem!reader

genre: romance, slow burn, fluff, emotional smut, domestic married life, eventual pregnancy, emotional growth, healing.

warnings: explicit sexual content (18+), strong language, emotional vulnerability, pregnancy mention (later), minor angst, lots of kissing, crying, soft husband jaehyun, tooth-rotting fluff, crying-in-the-club type of love.

wc: 19,7K

notes: i’m obsessed with jaehyun as a boss, boyfriend, hubby, and daddy lmao. man’s got range 😮‍💨💍🖤 i swear i try to keep it short but my brain goes rogue every time 😭 like girl be fr, when’s the day i finally drop a short fic??? bye lmao 💀

you’re twenty-nine, and the number feels heavier than you thought it would. not because it’s old—not really—but because thirty is close. and thirty means expectations. by now, you were supposed to have it all figured out. at least, that’s what they say. your friends certainly make it seem that way with their photo-perfect marriages, toddlers learning to walk, houses in peaceful neighborhoods. meanwhile, you still live in a quiet apartment with plants you often forget to water and a fridge that holds more takeout containers than groceries.

you work at an architecture firm—clean lines, big ideas, and even bigger egos. the kind of place where late nights are common and recognition is rare. you’ve built a name for yourself, though. you lead your team well, your ideas consistently get approved, and your work ethic has never been in question. the other women whisper that you’re just trying to impress the boss, that your dedication is nothing but a strategic flirtation. they don't know that your passion isn’t about pleasing anyone but yourself. well, mostly. maybe part of you does want to be seen. to be acknowledged by him.

jeong jaehyun.

your department lead. two years younger than you, but somehow always carrying himself like he’s lived three lives already. he doesn’t talk much. doesn’t engage in the small talk that fills the office kitchen or the empty flattery some of your coworkers throw his way. he’s serious, focused, almost too calm. the kind of man who’s unreadable, and yet somehow always watching. you’re not close, not really, but there’s a quiet understanding between you. he trusts you. you can feel it in the way he gives you space to lead, the way he nods subtly in meetings when you speak, the way his eyes linger sometimes—not in a way that feels invasive, but like he’s... thinking.

you’ve never seen him flirt with anyone. never seen him talk about his personal life. no ring, no photos on his desk, not even vague mentions of a girlfriend or family. and while no one dares to say anything to his face, everyone wonders. he's a man, though—no one criticizes him for being single. no one asks him what he's waiting for.

you, on the other hand, can barely go a week without someone making a comment. still not married? you’re so pretty, what a shame. your mother means well, but every call ends with a variation of you’re not getting any younger, sweetheart.you smile through it. you tell them you're happy. you tell yourself that, too. but deep down, there's a quiet ache. because you’ve always wanted a family. always dreamed of being a mother, of coming home to someone who knows you—not just your schedule or your favorite takeout order, but the way you think, the way you feel things deeply and try to hide it. but love hasn’t knocked in years. not since your last relationship ended at twenty-two, before the world hardened your heart. since then, you’ve been too busy, too careful, too tired.

tonight, you're staying late again. the office is nearly empty, save for a few flickering lights and the buzz of a vending machine down the hall. you're finessing the last pieces of a major project, making sure every detail is just right. you're in the zone when you hear soft footsteps approaching, and then his voice—low, familiar, closer than expected.

“you’re still here, byun?”

you glance up to find jaehyun standing by your desk, hands in his pockets, that usual unreadable expression on his face. there’s no judgment in his voice, just quiet curiosity.

you offer a tired smile, leaning back in your chair. “oh, mr. jeong, i just wanted to polish a few things before the presentation. i figured if i leave anything messy, the senior managers will rip it apart. and then you’ll take the heat for it.”

he raises an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth twitching into something that almost looks like a smile. “you care that much about how i look to the execs?”

you shrug, turning back to your screen. “you’re my boss. if you look bad, i look bad.”

he lets out a soft exhale, a sound that's dangerously close to a chuckle. then he leans against your desk, his body relaxed but his eyes still sharp as ever. “you’re too committed.”

“you say that like it’s a bad thing.”

he shakes his head. “not bad. just... rare.”

a brief silence settles between you, not awkward, but weighted. it feels like he’s about to say something else, and when he does, it’s not what you expect.

“doesn’t your family mind that you stay this late?” his gaze holds yours. “your husband? kids?”

you blink, the question catching you off guard. your smile falters just slightly, and you look down at your hands before answering.

“no husband. no kids. no one waiting at home.” you try to sound casual, even throw in a little laugh. “i guess i’m just married to the job.”

he doesn’t laugh. doesn’t look away. “i didn’t know.”

you nod, suddenly very aware of the silence around you. “most people assume. but... yeah. i live alone.”

another pause. then, gently, you ask, “what about you, mr. jeong? i mean, you’re always here late too. no one waiting on you?”

he looks away for the first time, his jaw tightening slightly before he answers. “no one yet.”

and there it is again—that silence between you. but this time, it’s different. it hums with something unspoken. curiosity. surprise. maybe even recognition.

you return your gaze to the screen, not really seeing it. he’s still standing there, close enough to feel but not close enough to touch. something in the air shifts, and for the first time in a long time, your chest feels... not heavy, but full.

the next morning, you arrived a few minutes early—just like always. being punctual wasn’t about impressing anyone; it was about control, about proving—at least to yourself—that you had your life together. it made you feel reliable. consistent. in a workplace full of half-assed excuses and people who couldn’t meet a deadline to save their lives, your discipline was something you wore like armor. something no one could take from you.

your outfit was soft, delicate even—rose-pink skirt brushing just above your knees, a crisp white button-up tucked in neatly, the blazer matching your skirt in a subtle pastel tone. your heels clicked softly against the tile floor as you made your way to your desk, and as you passed the reflection on one of the glass panels, you couldn’t help but think: i look good today.

you did. your hair was in place, makeup light but elegant, lips tinted a faint nude-pink. polished. pretty. professional. but beneath all that... you also looked a little alone. not that anyone would say it to your face—but you could see it sometimes, in the glances people gave you. admiration, maybe. pity, sometimes. curiosity always.

you sat down, smoothing your skirt and adjusting your chair, reaching for the little yellow post-it you’d stuck to the side of your monitor the day before. your handwriting was neat, methodical. a short list of pending tasks, each one already being mentally checked off as you booted up your computer. you didn’t waste time—your fingers flew across the keyboard, and within minutes the familiar sounds of productivity filled your small corner of the office: the rhythmic clack of keys, the soft hum and spit of the printer warming up to spit out proposals and reports.

you didn’t hear him come in.

you were too deep in the flow, too focused on aligning the final report with the visual standards the company demanded. your eyes scanned the document line by line, searching for typos, ensuring everything was clean, sharp, presentable. the sound of footsteps behind you didn’t register until you felt it—that subtle, electric awareness that comes when someone is watching.

“good morning, byun. please leave the project report on my desk once it’s ready.”

he didn’t look at you. just passed by, smooth and quick, his voice calm and firm, a cup of steaming coffee in one hand, the familiar scent of roast beans and expensive cologne trailing behind him like a silent presence. his stride didn’t falter, his gaze fixed ahead, like he’d already moved on to the next ten things in his mind. you barely had time to nod, mouth parted to respond, but he was already disappearing behind his office door.

you blinked.

right. the report.

you gathered the last printed pages, slid them into the presentation folder, double-checked the order, smoothed the cover with your palm before rising from your seat. your heels clicked softly against the floor as you made your way down the short corridor, your fingers lightly tapping the edge of the folder, nerves tightening with each step even if there was nothing to be nervous about. it was just work. just jaehyun. just another report.

you knocked once and entered when he answered. he was seated behind his desk, sleeves already rolled up to his elbows, the dark veins of his forearms visible as he typed something on his laptop. he glanced up, briefly, then reached for the report when you held it out.

“thank you,” he said, flipping it open with precision, already scanning the contents. “at two p.m. we have the meeting with upper management. you’ll be joining me at the table. along with choi and hwang.”

you nodded. “understood.”

“good. go over the numbers one more time before then. they’re likely to ask.”

“yes, mr. jeong.”

and that was it. no warm smile. no thank you. just professional, cold efficiency. you turned and left, closing the door gently behind you before returning to your desk, the weight of the upcoming meeting settling on your shoulders like a familiar cloak. you’d been through this before. plenty of times. but it never got easier. not when the room was full of men in suits who barely hid their condescension, who chewed through ideas like tasteless gum until someone—usually jaehyun—said something smart enough to catch their interest.

you spent the next few hours fine-tuning the financial section, making sure your data was clean, graphs properly labeled, estimates realistic but still ambitious. it was a delicate game—making things sound innovative without actually suggesting anything too risky. they didn’t want bold. they wanted impressive illusions of boldness packaged in safe wrapping.

the meeting room was as bland as ever. too much glass, too much beige. you sat at the long table beside jaehyun, your laptop open, presentation ready. the managers arrived first, already complaining about another team’s failed prototype. the director entered last, stone-faced as always, his tie perfect, his opinion impossible to read.

as expected, the meeting dragged. they picked apart the proposal, paragraph by paragraph, expressionless until one of them grimaced like the very concept of originality offended them. you watched them, these men who nodded at each other but rarely smiled, who offered feedback that wasn’t feedback, just empty phrases like “it needs more punch” or “is this trend even scalable?”

then jaehyun spoke.

his voice was calm, slow, measured. and yet he made every single line sound convincing. powerful. like there was no other way forward but the one he was laying out. the room shifted around him. the tension eased. eyes narrowed—not in skepticism now, but interest. he wasn’t just presenting; he was selling a vision, and you felt yourself straightening with pride even if the credit wasn’t yours.

until he said your name.

“y/n,” he said, still facing the director. “if you could present the budget projections.”

you froze for a half second. not out of fear—just... surprise. you hadn’t expected him to call on you so soon.

you stood, smoothed your skirt unconsciously, and took a breath before switching slides. your voice was steady, even if your palms were clammy.

“these are the projections for the next two quarters,” you began, pointing at the chart. “we’ve estimated a moderate increase in cost during the development phase, with a break-even point projected for the beginning of q3. depending on the approved budget, we’re looking at a return on investment of approximately—”

you kept going, explaining the graphs, walking them through the numbers with careful clarity. no embellishments, no guesswork. facts. you swallowed once, clearing your throat before the final slide, then ended with a nod.

when you sat back down, jaehyun glanced at you. just a moment. a flicker of something almost soft in his expression.

like you’d done well. like you couldn’t possibly disappoint him.

the rest of the meeting blurred. the managers began tossing in extra suggestions—small changes, tweaks they hoped would impress the director. the man nodded, offered vague praise, and you remained at your seat, listening to it all with a practiced, patient expression.

when the meeting finally ended, you stood beside jaehyun again. he didn’t say much—he never did—but as he packed his laptop, he looked at you.

“good work today,” he said. “you’re an essential part of the team. if you keep this up, i’ll make sure your name’s considered for the upcoming promotions.”

you stared at him, momentarily stunned. the words hit harder than you expected. you’d worked for five years, given everything to this company, and this—this was the first time someone above you had said something that felt... real.

“thank you,” you said softly, trying not to let your smile get too big. “really.”

he nodded. “you earned it.”

later, when the director extended the dinner invitation, you didn’t hesitate. it wasn’t optional. the team needed to show up, needed to mingle, to pretend everything was a celebration and not an endless cycle of office politics masked with clinking glasses.

the bar was upscale but casual enough to loosen people’s ties. smoke from grilled meats hung faintly in the air, the tang of sweet sauces and roasted garlic filling the space. you sat between your supervisor and jaehyun, trying not to feel too stiff in your work clothes. everyone was drinking, toasting, laughing louder than they had all day.

the supervisor leaned forward, voice slightly slurred. “you know,” he said to the director, “the whole prototype? the mockup? the execution timeline? all her. y/n practically carried the whole thing.”

the director turned to you, surprised. “really? how long have you been here?”

“five years,” you replied, sipping from your glass.

he raised a brow. “how is it possible i haven’t noticed you until now?”

jaehyun, still beside you, said nothing—but you felt the subtle tension in his posture.

“you’ve got a good employee,” the director told him. “it’s your job to shape her. teach her. sounds like she’s already on the right path. with the right guidance... she’ll move up in no time.”

he raised his glass. “to y/n.”

“to y/n,” echoed around the table.

you lifted your glass, cheeks warm—not just from the alcohol but from the unfamiliar sensation of being seen. you smiled, surrounded by coworkers and approval and good food, and for a moment, just one moment, everything felt like it was finally going somewhere.

you were finally going somewhere.

the dinner had blurred into noise.

conversations overlapping, laughter rising and falling like tides. glasses clinked, meat sizzled on the grill, the warm lighting softening everyone's expressions into something hazy and unguarded. you sat at the long table, just a bit to the side, the smoky scent of barbecued meat in your hair and the echo of compliments still lingering in your chest. across from you, your supervisor had long since slipped into a drunken retelling of his glory days. to your left, jaehyun sat quietly, jacket off, shirt sleeves rolled to his elbows. his arms were strong, veins defined even in the low light, and on his left wrist, a sleek, expensive watch glinted every time he reached for his glass. he hadn’t touched his soju in a while, though. he just held the rim between his fingers and occasionally let his gaze wander across the room.

when your eyes met, it was casual, almost accidental. but you didn’t look away.

“you’re not drinking,” you said, quietly enough that only he could hear.

he offered the ghost of a smirk, the kind that barely pulled at one corner of his mouth. “someone has to remember what was actually said tonight.”

you laughed, a soft breathy sound, grateful for his clarity amidst the chaos.

a silence settled between you, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. rather, it felt like a small space carved out just for the two of you—unbothered, untouched, a bubble where you didn’t have to keep smiling or pretending. you let out a quiet sigh, swirling your untouched drink in your hand.

“do you ever feel like you're running out of time?” you asked, voice low, not even sure why you were asking him of all people.

jaehyun looked at you, brows drawn slightly, intrigued but still calm. “time for what?”

you hesitated, fingers tightening around your glass. the alcohol was warm in your chest, but not enough to numb this confession.

“for everything,” you admitted. “i mean, professionally… things are going great. i can’t complain. i’ve worked hard, and it’s starting to pay off. but…” you looked down, lips pressing together. “sometimes i feel like i’m trapped inside a giant hourglass, watching the sand fall, grain by grain. i’ll be thirty in a few months. and i know that shouldn't mean anything, but in a world where people expect you to have everything figured out by now—marriage, kids, some picture-perfect life—i feel like i’m falling behind. like my dreams are moving farther and farther away.”

you took a breath, not daring to look at him.

“it’s just… sad,” you continued. “when you achieve something big and there’s no one waiting at home to celebrate it with you. no partner, no family. no one to say, ‘i’m proud of you.’”

jaehyun was quiet for a moment. then his voice came, soft and even.

“i can celebrate with you.”

you looked up, surprised, blinking at him. “thank you, but… that’s not what i meant. it’s not the same.”

he held your gaze. then, calmly, like he was offering a solution to a logistics problem, he said it.

“then marry me.”

your brain stalled.

you didn’t understand at first. maybe you misheard him. maybe he was joking, or drunk—except his voice hadn’t changed. his tone hadn’t wavered. your stomach dropped.

“…what?” you whispered.

“you want a family. you want someone to come home to. marry me.”

the words hung between you like smoke. absurd. unreal. your mouth opened, but nothing came out at first. you glanced around—everyone else was too busy laughing or slurring their next toast to notice what had just happened.

you leaned in slightly, voice tense and hushed. “mr.—jeong—what are you talking about? we don’t even know each other like that.”

“we know enough,” he said without blinking.

“we’ve never even had a real conversation outside of work until now.”

“so let’s have more,” he replied, as steady as always.

you felt like your heart was beating too loudly. “are you… are you seriously suggesting we get married?”

“i’m not suggesting it. i’m telling you i’d do it. if you said yes.”

you stared at him, at the cool detachment on his face, the quiet certainty in his voice, and felt your world tip on its axis.

he shrugged. “how long until you turn thirty?”

“…my birthday’s in november,” you muttered, the words escaping before you could even process them. “it’s april now. that’s seven months.”

jaehyun nodded slowly. “then you have seven months to decide.”

he finished his beer in one slow, final gulp. then he stood up, reaching into his wallet and placing a few bills under his empty glass. you were still frozen when he stepped beside you.

“i’ll take you home,” he said.

you tried to protest, voice stumbling over half-formed refusals. “you don’t have to—i can call a cab, really—”

he looked down at you, expression unreadable.

“that wasn’t a request. it’s your boss giving you a ride.”

and with that, he turned, waiting for you to follow. your legs felt heavy as you stood, your mind racing, still reeling from what had just happened. marry him? seven months? he was serious. he was actually serious.

you had no answers. only questions. and one man who had just offered you everything you’d spent your life pretending you didn’t need.

you didn’t sleep.

not really. you tossed and turned, arms flung across the bed one minute and buried under the covers the next. jaehyun’s words echoed in your skull like an intrusive melody, looping over and over again.

then marry me.

you have seven months to decide.

like some sort of countdown had been triggered.

you must have stared at your ceiling for hours, trying to make sense of what he meant—what it meant for you—and whether he’d been serious. but the worst part wasn’t the proposal. the worst part was how calm he’d been, how effortlessly he’d said it, and how easily he’d walked away afterward like it hadn’t upended your entire sense of self.

your alarm went off at seven, and you hit snooze five times. by the time you dragged yourself out of bed, you felt like your bones had aged a decade overnight. you put on your makeup with the heaviness of someone trying to erase exhaustion from the inside out—concealer, color corrector, foundation. you went over your under-eyes twice, then a third time. you looked like yourself, but blurry. off.

you arrived to work twenty minutes later than usual, which was already enough to earn a few raised brows. no one said anything, but they noticed. you noticed them noticing.

you sat at your desk and stared at your drawers, forgetting which one you kept the monthly reports in. your fingers shook slightly as you shuffled through folders, trying to find the stupid paperwork you'd seen a million times. a stack of them slipped from your grasp and scattered onto the floor like a metaphor. you groaned and crouched down to collect them, muttering under your breath. your brain still felt like it was swimming through molasses.

then—

“good morning.”

his voice. that casual, bored tone he always used in the office. neutral, even, no trace of anything buried beneath it. no sign that he’d ever said something as life-altering as what he’d said last night.

you startled so hard you hit your head on the underside of your desk.

“good—ouch!” you winced, clutching your scalp with one hand and your pride with the other. “good morning, mr. jeong.”

he kept walking. didn’t glance down at you. didn’t smirk. didn’t check if you were okay. he passed your desk like any other morning, like he hadn’t proposed to you over beer and smoke and shared loneliness.

a few coworkers peeked over their partitions, concerned. you gave a shaky thumbs-up and a whispered, “i’m fine,” even though you felt anything but fine.

you weren’t like this. not at work. not ever. your name was synonymous with precision. discipline. control. and here you were, dropping papers and bumping into furniture like your brain had short-circuited.

you finally gathered the reports and brought them to his office.

he was seated at his desk, focused on his screen, the sleeves of his dress shirt still rolled to his elbows. your eyes caught briefly on the line of his forearm, the watch still there, still ticking.

“these are the reports from last month,” you said, setting the folder down.

“thanks,” he replied without looking at you.

you lingered.

“mr. jeong.”

he finally looked up.

his eyes were calm. cool. like nothing was wrong. like he hadn’t detonated a bomb and walked away from the wreckage.

you hesitated, your throat dry. “about what you said last night—”

his expression didn’t change.

“we’re at work,” he said simply. “i’m being professional.”

you blinked, almost offended. “so that’s it? you say something that insane and then just—go back to normal?”

“we’ll talk after work,” he said, returning to his screen. “if you want to.”

you stood there, gripping the folder even though it was already out of your hands, heart thudding with something sour and hot and unnamable. frustration? humiliation? confusion? all of it?

he was treating you like you were the one out of line. like you were being inappropriate for even bringing it up.

you turned around without saying anything else and walked out of his office, pulse hammering in your ears. the rest of the day dragged like wet cement. you couldn’t concentrate. you couldn’t remember what you were supposed to be doing half the time. you reread emails four times before hitting send. and every time someone walked past your desk, you wondered if it was him, if he’d say anything, if he’d look at you, if he even remembered what he said or if the memory of it belonged to you alone now.

you’d never felt so out of control.

you didn’t know what was worse—his silence or the fact that you wanted him to break it.

you tried to focus. god, you really did. you stared at spreadsheets until the numbers blurred into static. you answered emails with words you didn���t remember typing. every time the phone rang, your heart jumped, irrationally convinced it might be him—even though you were in the same building, separated by maybe thirty feet of glass, air, and unspoken tension. it felt like the longest day of your life. your temples throbbed with a slow, building ache, like your thoughts were pressing too hard against the inside of your skull.

you popped two painkillers around lunchtime, washed them down with lukewarm water from your reusable bottle, but they didn’t help. not really. because the pain wasn’t just physical—it was mental. emotional. a kind of pressure that wrapped around your ribs and squeezed.

your mind wouldn’t shut up.

you kept looping the same questions, over and over again, like your brain was stuck on a carousel with no exit.

why would he say that? why now? why you?

he already told you he'd wait. seven months. seven impossibly long, slow-burning months.

so why talk? why meet? it wasn’t for him. it didn’t serve him. he’d been clear. he had time, he had patience. this conversation—it was for you. you were the one desperate to make sense of it. to understand his motives. to justify the insanity of it all.

but how were you supposed to justify something that made no sense?

he’s twenty-seven. handsome. polished. wealthy. he could have anyone—literally anyone. girls younger than you, brighter than you, women who weren’t crawling toward their thirties with a fading list of half-achieved dreams and a fridge full of takeout leftovers. why you?

a mid-level employee in a department no one paid much attention to. someone who had to fight tooth and nail just to be noticed in board meetings. someone who had accomplishments but no one to toast with. someone who fell asleep most nights with their phone face-down and on silent because no one was texting anyway.

why you?

you didn’t have an answer.

you finished your tasks—barely—and the moment the clock hit the end of your shift, you shut your computer down with shaky fingers and grabbed your bag. your steps felt heavy, reluctant, as you made your way through the hall toward the entrance. part of you wanted to bolt, to pretend nothing had ever been said, to go home and crawl into bed and put on a show you wouldn’t really watch. to sleep off the confusion like a bad hangover.

but the doors opened before you could entertain the thought. those clean, automatic glass doors slid apart with a hiss, and there he was.

leaning casually against one of the white pillars just outside, his suit jacket draped neatly over his forearm, his other hand gripping his sleek black briefcase like it weighed nothing. he looked like something out of a commercial—well-dressed, composed, the perfect image of success. but when his eyes met yours, something flickered beneath the surface. maybe restraint. maybe tension. maybe nothing.

he walked toward you calmly, the sound of his footsteps muffled by the smooth tile.

“get in the car,” he said, voice even. “we’re going to talk. like you wanted.”

not a question. not a request.

he turned without waiting for your answer and made his way to a parked luxury sedan—shiny, deep black, windows tinted so dark you could barely see the interior. he opened the passenger door for you, as if the conversation that waited inside was just another part of his routine.

you hesitated, only for a second.

but then you followed.

because no matter how messy your thoughts were, no matter how terrified or confused or unworthy you felt, one truth cut through the noise:

you wanted to know.

you slid into the passenger seat, trying to calm the way your heart was sprinting inside your chest. the door closed beside you with a quiet thunk, sealing you into a space you weren’t sure you were ready for.

he walked around the front of the car and got in behind the wheel, smooth and unhurried.

you stared straight ahead.

ready—or not—to finally ask the questions that wouldn’t leave you alone.

the silence in the car wasn’t uncomfortable. not exactly. but it was dense—like fog inside your chest, heavy and silent and there to stay.

you stared out the window as the city drifted past, familiar buildings made foreign by the storm in your head. beside you, jaehyun drove with one hand on the wheel, the other resting on the gearshift. there was music playing—low, jazzy, old—but he didn’t speak. not until you passed a traffic light and he tilted his head, casually.

“did you get enough sleep last night?” he asked, like he was commenting on the weather.

you didn’t look at him. “not really.”

“figured,” he said, turning smoothly into another avenue. “you looked like hell.”

you gave a humorless chuckle, resting your elbow against the door and propping your chin in your hand. “thanks for the compliment, sir.”

“anytime,” he said dryly.

and that was it. that was all the small talk he offered. nothing personal. nothing intimate. just an acknowledgment that he saw you. that he’d noticed.

the drive was short, and before you could make sense of anything, you were already parking in front of a modest little korean restaurant tucked between a laundromat and a bookstore. it smelled like steam, garlic, and simmered bone broth. a place where people went for real food and no-frills comfort.

“this place has the best gomguk in the city,” jaehyun said, grabbing his briefcase from the back. “been coming here since i was a teenager.”

you hesitated at the door. “you like bone soup?”

“love it.”

you wrinkled your nose. “i can’t stand that stuff. never could. not even as a kid.”

he paused mid-step and gave you a look, slightly amused. “well,” he said, “there’s our first disagreement as a couple.”

you blinked at him, caught off guard. “what?”

“now i know you don’t like gomguk. guess i’ll have to avoid cooking it for you.”

you said nothing.

because he wasn’t joking. not really. not entirely. and that was the part that made your mouth dry.

how could he say things like that so easily? so naturally? as if you hadn’t spent the entire day unraveling at the seams while he strutted through the office like nothing had happened?

he sat across from you at the table, unbothered, scanning the menu like it wasn’t even necessary. he already knew what he wanted. meanwhile, you still didn’t know why you were there.

you picked something else. kimchi jjigae, maybe—safe, familiar, strong enough to mask the taste of your confusion.

once the server took your orders and disappeared behind the curtain, you leaned forward, folding your hands together to stop them from trembling.

“why me?”

his eyes lifted slowly from the empty table to your face. “there’s no reason,” he said. “i just want to give you what you want.”

“do you say that to all women?”

he smirked. “if i did, i’d probably be married to half the city by now.”

you shook your head. “don’t do that.”

“do what?”

“don’t treat this like a mission,” you snapped, trying not to raise your voice. “i don’t need your pity. i shared something vulnerable with you, yeah. but that doesn’t mean you have to swoop in and rescue me from a miserable life of solitude by offering a ring. this isn’t some fairytale. i don’t need a man to save me.”

“i never said you did.”

you exhaled slowly. “i want to love and be loved. to build something. something real. not this... whatever this is. a contract. a deal. a deadline to escape loneliness.”

his expression didn’t shift. not a single flicker. but his voice softened.

“then let’s say this. if in seven months, you still haven’t found someone—someone who makes you feel like you can build something... try it with me.”

you stared at him. hard. trying to read every intention in the lines of his face.

“just like that?”

“just like that.”

you couldn’t look away.

and then he said it. the words that settled into the cracks of your resolve like warm rain after a drought.

“we can love. i can love you. you can love me, if you want to. if you want to date, we can date. you don’t have to feel pressured. i just think... you’re worth the risk. and i don’t think you should torture yourself every day that passes just because you haven’t ‘settled down.’ opportunities don’t always come twice. sometimes you have to grab them while they’re here. or regret it forever.”

your lips parted, but nothing came out.

you looked at him then—not as the cold, polished man who walked the halls like a ghost in tailored suits. not as your boss. not as someone who confused and overwhelmed you.

you saw him as a man.

a man who knew what he wanted. who wasn’t afraid to take action. who looked you in the eye and offered you something you weren’t even sure you deserved.

his jawline. his eyes. the little wrinkle between his brows when he got serious. the calm way he listened. the confidence. the clarity.

you saw him differently.

you weren’t ready to give him an answer. not yet.

but something inside you had shifted.

you just didn’t know what to call it.

he didn’t rush you.

he didn’t push.

he just sat there across from you in that tiny booth, his sleeves rolled up and his tie slightly loosened, waiting with the kind of quiet confidence that only made your heart beat louder. he stirred his soup gently, letting it cool, occasionally taking a sip without ever looking away from you for too long.

and then he said it—casually, as if proposing something as simple as lunch next week.

“let’s do this. i’ll pick you up after work from now on. we’ll go out. have dinner. spend time together. see what happens. let it unfold naturally.”

just like that.

your breath caught. “i… i have doubts,” you admitted, almost in a whisper. “i don’t know what to say. i don’t know what to feel. this is all so sudden, so... fast.”

he nodded, unbothered. “that’s okay.”

you blinked. “that’s okay?”

“yes. it’s not a race. but you heard what i said—opportunities don’t always knock twice. you don’t have to say yes right now. just think about it.”

but you were thinking. too much.

his voice played on repeat in your mind: we can love. i can love you. you can love me. and god, wasn’t that the exact thing you’d been terrified of never having?

your fingers trembled under the table. your palms clammy, your mouth dry. you rubbed your hands together slowly, grounding yourself in that simple motion, trying to breathe.

he didn’t flinch. didn’t ask again. just kept sipping his soup, patient as stone, like he’d already accepted whatever answer you’d give him.

you stared at your food, at the steam rising, the way the aroma filled the space between you and him like something sacred. you still couldn’t stand bone soup. but somehow, being across from him made it smell less... offensive. less like something to run from.

and you remembered.

all those nights crying in silence.

all those mornings brushing your teeth with tears stuck in your throat because you didn’t know if ever would come.

ever finding someone.

ever being enough.

ever being loved without begging for it.

maybe he wasn’t what you imagined.

maybe he was better.

you looked up at him.

��okay,” you said, softly. then stronger. “okay. i’ll try. i’ll let you pick me up. we’ll go on these dates. maybe… maybe i can love you. maybe i can let myself be loved by you.”

he paused mid-sip, eyes lifting.

your voice cracked slightly when you added, “maybe i can stay with you.”

for a beat, the world went still.

he didn’t smile wide. didn’t gloat or tease.

he just gave a slow, almost imperceptible nod. his eyes warm, deep, but controlled—like someone who’d been expecting this moment and didn’t want to scare it off.

“good,” he said. “that’s all i needed.”

you swallowed hard.

and for the first time since that strange proposal, something in your chest loosened.

you weren’t sure if this was love.

but it was a beginning.

the next morning. everything is different.

you walk into the building like you own the damn place—heels sharp, suit immaculate, makeup clean and fierce, ponytail slicked high like a crown. the memory of yesterday—your stumble, your throbbing head, your wandering thoughts—now felt like a distant, irrelevant dream. that wasn’t you. this was.

a woman who knew what she wanted.

a woman who said yes.

you smiled to yourself in the elevator. not just any smile—that kind. the kind that curled at the corners, the kind that held secrets, the kind that felt like sin dressed in silk. the kind that belonged to someone with a man waiting outside a restaurant, ordering bone broth, and talking about love like it was something simple. doable. inevitable.

you were early. again. not by accident this time, but by choice.

you slid into your desk, organized, efficient, present. the hum of the office hadn’t started yet, and you took advantage of the calm, catching up on reports and scheduling the week like the good girl you were trained to be. but this time, it was different. you weren’t surviving the day. you were anticipating it.

and then—at exactly the hour—he walked in.

jung jaehyun.

same black suit. same silver watch. same air of cool detachment.

but today, when he passed by your desk and muttered his usual, “good morning,” you didn’t just nod like before.

you stood up—too fast.

too happy.

“good morning, mr. jeong!” you sang, voice lilting and almost musical, like you’d just won the lottery.

it was instinctual. not calculated. just... you.

the entire floor stopped.

heads turned.

some eyebrows shot up. a few eyes narrowed.

jaehyun himself halted in his tracks, looking back at you slowly, his brows drawn together in the tiniest frown. he cleared his throat.

“everyone, back to work,” he said, voice firm. and then, after one last look—eyes narrowed at you in something between confusion and amusement—he turned and walked away.

you bit your lip so hard it almost hurt, barely suppressing the giggle building in your throat.

the memory of last night echoed in your mind, maybe i can love you, maybe i can stay with you—and now here you were, trying not to beam like a teenager with a crush. you watched his back disappear into his office, and your lips curled up, despite yourself.

you could still feel his eyes on you. even if he wasn’t looking.

after work, you waited by the entrance as the glass doors slid open.

he was already there—like he promised. leaning casually against his car, black coat folded over one arm, briefcase in hand, gaze scanning the horizon like the perfect ceo out of a drama. but as soon as his eyes met yours, they softened—barely, subtly—but you noticed.

“get in,” he said, opening the passenger door for you.

you slipped in without protest, heart beating faster than it had any right to.

once the car pulled away from the curb, the silence settled—but it didn’t last long.

“you can’t do that,” he said, not harshly, just... firm.

“do what?” you asked, knowing damn well.

“greet me like that. like that.” he glanced at you sideways. “at work.”

you shrugged. “what? we’re dating now. aren’t we?”

“we’re seeing where this goes,” he corrected. “but we still have to be professional. people talk. your position can be affected. and mine—”

you cut in, not harshly but with a certain fire. “i’m not going to apologize for being happy.”

“i’m not asking you to apologize.”

“then don’t ask me to pretend. i’ll dial it down, sure. but i’m not going to act like you don’t mean something to me when we’re under the same roof eight hours a day.”

he stayed quiet for a beat, tapping the wheel with one hand, lips twitching like he was trying not to smile.

“is this how you are with all your boyfriends?”

you grinned. “i’m worse.”

he laughed. actually laughed. that deep, velvet sound you hadn’t heard much outside of formalities.

“well, i’ll brace myself,” he said. “i might enjoy it.”

you turned to the window, hiding your smile. this was really happening.

the drive back was quiet at first—a comfortable silence that didn’t demand immediate conversation. the kind of quiet that says: you don’t need to perform, just exist here with me.

the radio was on. a soft playlist of english ballads played in the background—songs about longing, beginnings, maybe even second chances. you doubted jaehyun picked them himself. it was probably just the algorithm. still, the timing felt so precise… so intentional, that you wondered if the universe was helping him out tonight.

you played with your fingers over your thighs, crossing and uncrossing your legs slowly, watching the night pass outside the window. city lights in the distance. trees swaying softly in the wind. you tried to guess where he was taking you next, but the truth was… you didn’t really care.

not knowing was part of the charm.

“where are we going?” you finally asked, unable to resist the curiosity.

he smiled without turning to look at you, eyes steady on the road ahead.

“it’s a secret,” he said. “you’ll have to wait and see.”

you squinted at him with mock suspicion, amused—and yet, inside, your heart started to thump a little faster with every mile.

there was something strangely beautiful about not being in control this time. about letting yourself be taken somewhere, not out of submission, but out of trust. you weren’t used to that. you weren’t used to letting anyone drive. but tonight, you wanted to believe you could lean back and just... be.

and then… the car turned down a dark, barely lit road, and you saw it.

a wide, open lot. a giant projector screen glowing at the far end. dozens of cars parked in neat rows, some with trunks open, fairy lights, blankets, snacks. couples curled together under the stars.

it was a drive-in movie. like something out of an old romance film.

you gasped, both hands flying to your mouth as you turned to him.

“oh my god. no way. are you serious?! i love the movies—but i've never done this. i’ve always wanted to, but… i don’t know. it just never happened.”

jaehyun glanced at you sideways. and this time, he smiled. really smiled. not the polite, composed smile he wore in the hallways or meetings—but something warm. something real.

“then it was a good idea,” he said simply.

he parked in the middle row. good view of the screen, but far enough for privacy. you were already melting—and then he popped the trunk.

a thick blanket. two small pillows. a tote bag with snacks—popcorn, a big soda bottle, even the exact chocolate bars you’d once said you liked during a random, probably drunk, late-night conversation. you didn’t even remember mentioning it.

he did.

“did you plan all of this?” you asked, curled slightly sideways in the passenger seat while he arranged everything with care between you.

“i just wanted you to be comfortable,” he said. “i wanted it to be... special.”

no posturing. no hidden motive. just sincerity. you felt it in the way he unfolded the blanket and draped it gently over your lap. in how he checked the window—cracked just enough to let in the breeze, not enough to let in the cold. In how he handed you the soda first, before even opening his own drink.

the movie started. some lighthearted rom-com with ridiculous dialogue and cheesy plot points, but it didn’t matter. it was perfect. low-stakes. no pressure. you curled your legs under you, blanket snug, the flickering light from the screen dancing across your skin.

every once in a while, you’d glance at jaehyun. and more than once, you caught him watching you instead of the film.

“are you bored?” you whispered.

“not even close.”

“you haven’t laughed once.”

he turned to you, that sarcastic little smirk tugging at one corner of his mouth, eyes narrowed just slightly.

“you’re already making enough noise for the both of us.”

you gave him a playful slap on the arm, pretending to be offended.

“that was a compliment,” he added, amused.

you rolled your eyes—but smiled. god, you smiled so much that night.

as the credits rolled, something shifted in the silence. the mood thickened—not heavy, just… deeper. weighted with something. a moment hanging on the edge of change. your head leaned against the window as the screen dimmed, your eyes distant but your heart so very full.

he still didn’t touch you.

he didn’t grab your hand. didn’t lean in.

but his presence wrapped around you all the same—solid, patient, waiting. not pushing, just there. learning how to be near you without demanding anything in return.

“thank you,” you said softly, voice almost too quiet to hear. “for this. for everything.”

“you don’t have to thank me.”

“yes, i do. it’s not every day someone goes out of their way like this.”

he paused before answering. his tone was steady, but low.

“i want this to work,” he said. “and if that means planning teenage-level dates with blankets and popcorn, then… yeah. i’ll do that.”

you laughed, eyes dropping to your lap.

“you’re doing well so far.”

“yeah?”

“yeah.”

and then you looked at each other. just looked. no words needed.

but inside… you felt it.

your shoulders, usually tense, were light. your heart, bruised and cautious for so long, was opening again. quietly, but surely. as if whispering, i’m still here. i still want to believe.

you weren’t sure where this would go. if it would last. if it would end in tears or something worse.

but right now, in his car, under the stars, with the last notes of the film still echoing through your skin…

you wanted to find out.

you wanted to try.

the next morning at the office felt different—less chaotic, more grounded. you greeted the receptionist with a small smile, your heels clicking softly against the marble floor as you made your way in, clutching your coffee cup like a security blanket. you weren't glowing, exactly, but something about you was… softer. less guarded. like a petal finally relaxing in the warmth of spring after a too-long winter.

jaehyun noticed immediately.

you caught him watching you from the glass-walled conference room as you entered the bullpen. he didn't stare, not in a way that would make it obvious to others—but his eyes followed you, just long enough to clock the change. your navy blue pencil skirt hugged your hips, the slit in the back offering just the right amount of grace as you walked. the cream blouse you wore was modest but elegant, the top button left undone, showing the delicate line of your collarbone. your hair was half-up, your makeup minimal, professional—but the gloss on your lips and the quiet shimmer on your eyelids betrayed a whisper of mischief. not overt. just enough for someone paying attention.

you met his gaze briefly through the glass and raised your brows in a silent hello before looking away, sipping your coffee with forced nonchalance.

by the time you crossed paths an hour later—both of you heading into a smaller briefing room—he gave you that look again. the one that asked, really? amused, but faintly disbelieving.

"good morning, mr. jeong," you greeted him politely, eyes straight ahead as if you hadn't spent the last night wrapped in his blanket, watching a movie with your legs tangled under it.

"miss y/l/n," he replied, his lips curving into a knowing smile as he held the door open for you. “very formal today.”

you didn’t rise to the bait. just gave him a brief, professional smile and walked past, heels clicking, not looking back. you were committed to the bit.

the meeting was brief, technical—a review of deliverables, some feedback loops, nothing out of the ordinary. you contributed where you needed to, kept your tone measured, avoided lingering glances. even when he made a rare joke and the room chuckled, you only allowed yourself a small, polite laugh, hands folded neatly on the table.

he didn’t push. but when you passed each other near the coffee station later, his voice dropped low, just enough for you to hear.

“you’re really leaning into the whole executive assistant with boundaries thing, huh?”

you smirked as you refilled your mug, still not looking at him. “just trying to keep things professional, mr. jeong.”

“of course.” he nodded once, pretending to adjust his tie. “wouldn’t want to cross any lines.”

you bit your lip to suppress your grin. the game was on.

at 3:47 PM, your phone lit up with a text from his office number: meeting with the department heads in fifteen. boardroom. don’t be late. signed J.J.

you rolled your eyes but your stomach did a little flip.

the 4 PM meeting dragged—there was a lot of back and forth over campaign numbers and rollout schedules, but you held your own, taking notes, speaking clearly when your insight was needed. you could feel jaehyun watching you when others weren’t—his gaze warm, grounding—but he didn’t speak to you directly unless it was related to the discussion. you appreciated that. It let you stay in control, let you breathe.

after everyone had trickled out and the room was quiet, you stayed behind a moment, closing your laptop and straightening the chairs without a word. he didn’t move from his seat at the head of the table, just watched you as you moved, his fingers idly spinning a pen.

“dinner?” he asked eventually, breaking the silence.

you didn’t look up right away. “are you asking as mr. jeong or...?”

he tilted his head, eyes playful. “just jaehyun.”

you looked up, meeting his eyes. something flickered between you—recognition. of the past few days, the softness in your chest, the way your shoulders had finally stopped bracing for disappointment.

“okay,” you said quietly. “dinner.”

he didn’t take you to a fancy restaurant or anywhere showy. just a quiet little rooftop place downtown, dim lights and mellow music, open air and the sound of the city below. you sat across from him at a small table, knees brushing under the surface. you shared dishes, laughed softly, talked about nothing and everything. he asked about your childhood; you asked about his first heartbreak. there was no rush to get anywhere. just being there—together—was enough.

at some point, after dessert and a second glass of wine, the conversation quieted. the city stretched around you, glittering and alive. jaehyun leaned back in his chair, watching you.

at some point, after dessert and a second glass of wine, the conversation quieted. the city stretched around you, glittering and alive. jaehyun leaned back in his chair, watching you with that open expression he reserved for moments like this—unguarded, gently curious.

“you said you grew up outside the city,” he said, casually swirling the remnants of his drink. “what about your parents?”

you set your fork down and rested your elbows lightly on the table, exhaling. “they still live in the same town. a couple hours from here.”

he nodded. “siblings?”

“one,” you replied. “older brother. married. two little boys.”

jaehyun smiled at that. “you’re the cool aunt.”

you laughed softly, the sound bittersweet. “i try. i send them stickers and weird snacks from the city. but i think i’m mostly the mysterious aunt who lives alone in seoul and doesn’t have a husband, which is a major point of concern for my parents.”

jaehyun raised an eyebrow, clearly amused. “concern?”

“oh, huge.” you leaned back, crossing your arms with a mock-serious nod. “they think i’m one heartbreak away from crawling back into my childhood bedroom with a suitcase and giving up entirely. i get the same call every weekend—‘have you met someone yet?’ and ‘when are you coming home, sweetheart?’ like my single status is a national emergency.”

you smiled, tried to make it sound light. funny. but the knot in your chest tugged a little tighter with each word. because underneath the teasing tone, it hurt. the weight of expectation, of having let them down without really meaning to. you’d always thought, by now, you’d have that picture-perfect family. a husband. maybe a child. but life had taken its own sharp turns, and somewhere along the way, you'd lost the map.

before your thoughts could spiral too far inward, you turned your eyes toward him and asked, “what about you? any siblings?”

he shook his head. “only child.”

“wow. that explains the drama,” you teased.

he grinned, playing along. “what drama?”

you shrugged, playful. “the perfectly tousled hair. the quiet confidence. the whole mysterious boss with a tragic past vibe.”

jaehyun laughed, the sound low and warm. “nothing tragic, thankfully. my parents own a condo complex back in busan. they keep to themselves. ever since i moved out, they’ve stayed out of my decisions. no guilt trips. no blind dates.”

he smirked a little, taking another sip. “which is great for me.”

you smiled at that, but there was something about the way he said it—casual, yes, but laced with a kind of loneliness you recognized. the kind that came with being left alone a little too much. with being successful but still carrying a shadow no one quite asked about.

you watched him for a second longer than necessary. then nodded slowly. “that does sound kind of great.”

he looked at you then, really looked, and the silence between you shifted—deeper now. heavy with things not said.

the city hummed around you. glasses clinked from other tables. somewhere, a violinist was playing faintly near the street below. but you only heard the soft cadence of his breath, the way it matched your own.

and then he stood and offered you his hand.

you didn’t hesitate this time. you let him lead you to the edge of the rooftop, where the view was clearer, the air colder. your arms brushed as you looked out together, shoulder to shoulder, warm skin against cool wind.

he turned to you first, eyes darker now, thoughtful. “you don’t need to rush anything. marriage, or whatever they want from you. you’re… okay. just as you are.”

you looked at him slowly, your heart caught somewhere between gratitude and ache. “thanks,” you whispered. “sometimes i forget.”

he stepped closer—barely—but it was enough to make your breath hitch.

you met his gaze, and something shifted between you again. tighter. stronger. the kind of tension that doesn’t demand to be broken, only… felt.

he leaned in slowly, giving you every chance to pull away. you didn’t.

your lips met his softly, a single, tentative kiss that carried the full weight of everything left unspoken. sweet, searching, the kind of kiss that says i see you. that says stay.

and when you pulled back, your eyes didn’t dart away.

they lingered.

because something had begun. and neither of you was pretending anymore.

there was no big speech. no sudden declarations.

just the quiet gravity of this moment. the closeness. the way his eyes searched yours with a gentleness that made your breath catch.

april melted into may in soft, golden increments—like a candle burning slow at both ends. the weather grew gentler, the evenings warmer, and with each passing day, your relationship with jaehyun unraveled in small, tender pieces that neither of you rushed to name.

you had more dinners together. nothing extravagant—he wasn’t the kind to impress with grand gestures—but always thoughtful. ramen tucked away in a quiet corner shop with mismatched stools. a spontaneous detour after a work meeting that led to an art gallery’s closing hour. coffee at a tiny cafe with mismatched mugs and jazz playing softly from a dusty speaker. with every outing, something softened between you. the way you spoke to each other, the way you lingered a second longer when saying goodbye, the way your eyes found his in a crowded room and stayed there.

still, at work, everything remained perfectly composed. restrained. you never touched, never called him anything but mr. jeong. no one suspected a thing—and that secrecy gave it all the thrill of something sacred. childish almost. like passing notes under a desk. a shared joke disguised in a spreadsheet. your fingers grazing when you exchanged documents. a glance too long in the breakroom when he poured your coffee before you even asked. you could feel it in the air, that charged silence of two people pretending to be just colleagues, and failing quietly, deliciously.

the project itself was moving well—smooth timelines, promising data. it gave you an excuse to spend more time in his office, laptop open across from his, sometimes both of you too focused to speak for long stretches. sometimes one of you talking while the other typed, nodding with half-listening affection. sometimes, on the slow days, the lines between work and personal conversation blurred gently, like ink on damp paper.

today was one of those days.

you sat across from him, legs crossed under the conference table, scrolling through performance reports while he adjusted a chart on his screen. outside the windows, the afternoon sun filtered through the blinds, casting pale lines across the carpet and the sleeves of his shirt. he leaned back, stretching slightly, then caught your gaze with a small smile.

“so…” he said, voice lower than usual, “what are you doing this weekend?”

you glanced up, biting your lip to hide a smile. “why? do you need me to run more numbers?”

“maybe,” he said, teasing. “but i was thinking something less tragic. maybe the museum? or that poetry cafe you mentioned.”

you shrugged, trying to sound casual. “depends. are you asking as mr. jeong or as… jaehyun?”

he smirked, eyes playful. “i guess that depends on your answer.”

you were about to respond when the door opened without a knock. both of you sat up straighter instinctively, like students caught passing notes. the supervisor from the analytics division stepped in, scanning the room with barely concealed curiosity.

“mr. jeong,” he said, tone clipped, “the director wants to see you.”

jaehyun stood immediately, buttoning his jacket with an easy nod. “i’ll be there in a moment.”

the supervisor looked at you then. his eyes lingered—not long, but long enough. something unreadable passed over his face. “you’ve been spending a lot of time here,” he said, like it wasn’t a question.

you gave him your most neutral smile. “just supporting the project. we’re on a tight schedule.”

“mm.” he said nothing more, just nodded once and stepped out.

jaehyun glanced at you before leaving, and there was a flicker of something in his eyes—amusement, maybe. or quiet warning. you went back to your laptop, fingers pretending to type while your heart tried to calm its sudden gallop.

the evening found you both in his car again. the sun had already begun its descent, turning the sky a soft shade of apricot. you slid into the passenger seat, closed the door behind you, and without thinking too much, leaned over to kiss his cheek.

his skin was warm under your lips.

he blinked, clearly caught off guard, and for a second, he forgot to hide it. the tips of his ears flushed red. he cleared his throat and reached for the ignition, like nothing happened, but his smile lingered, crooked and faint.

“you keep doing that,” he murmured, not looking at you.

“doing what?” you asked innocently.

he shook his head, eyes on the road. “making it hard to pretend we’re not dating.”

you grinned and didn’t answer.

he drove you to the han river, where the breeze was cool and kind, and the crowds were light enough to feel private. you sat cross-legged on the grass, sharing tteokbokki and fried dumplings from paper trays, watching cyclists blur past under the lamplights. a small speaker nearby played an old ballad, sweet and melancholic, and you leaned into his shoulder without needing permission.

“i like this,” you said softly.

“what part?” he asked.

“this part. where everything’s… quiet.”

he didn’t speak immediately. just reached over and brushed a strand of hair behind your ear.

“me too.”

you looked at him, really looked—and it hit you in that moment how far you’d come. from formal greetings and polite distance to soft laughter and shared silence. from stolen glances to kisses on the cheek that left him blushing.

and somehow, without realizing it, you’d stopped keeping count of how many times you thought about him during the day. because now he was part of your days.

and you didn’t want to imagine them without him anymore.

june arrived with a subtle shift in rhythm—projects moved faster, deadlines drew closer, and the sun stayed longer in the sky. the office felt heavier in the afternoons, warm with late spring air and the quiet hum of new beginnings.

one of those beginnings came in the form of kim jungwoo.

he was transferred from the incheon branch—a bright-eyed analyst with quick wit and a laugh that filled corners. you were told he'd be supporting the data team, and since your department handled most of the projections, he was placed right in front of your desk, where your eyes met every time you looked up. your first impression of him was that he was disarmingly charming—too friendly, too easygoing for the stiff, quiet culture of the office—but undeniably efficient. he asked questions that made sense, learned fast, and had a way of easing tension with a joke delivered just under his breath.

you kept things professional, as always. showed him how you sorted the quarterly metrics, how to navigate the company’s outdated database system without crashing it, how to color-code your sheets for easier reading. he listened, smiled, nodded. and eventually, he joked. made you laugh when you’d been staring at the same budget chart for hours. brought you coffee with your name scribbled on the lid in dramatic calligraphy. sometimes too much, sometimes exactly what you needed.

you liked him. platonically. comfortably. it was easy to like jungwoo.

but jaehyun noticed. of course he did.

at first, it was subtle. he’d call you into his office more frequently, asking for reports he usually didn’t request until later in the week. you didn’t think much of it—until you realized he was keeping you in there for hours. even when the topic had already run dry, even when both of you were silently pretending to still be discussing something relevant. you’d glance at your watch, mumble about needing to check on jungwoo’s progress, and jaehyun would give you this look—tight-lipped, unreadable, almost irritated.

the third time it happened, you couldn’t keep quiet anymore.

“are you seriously going to keep me hostage in your office every time jungwoo asks me a question?” you asked, laptop balanced on your knees, arms crossed.

jaehyun didn’t answer right away. he leaned back in his chair, one hand draped lazily over the armrest, watching you. but there was tension under his cool expression, the kind that coiled in his jaw.

“you’re my girlfriend” he said, voice low, measured. “even if we have to act like colleagues in this building, you’re not just anyone to me.”

your breath caught. not because of what he said—because of the way he said it. with that sharp, quiet certainty, like it wasn’t up for debate.

“you’re jealous,” you muttered, trying to smile, to turn it into something lighter.

“of course i’m jealous,” he said, leaning forward. “he’s new, he’s charming, and he’s looking at you like he already knows what you taste like.”

your face flushed.

you looked away, but only for a second.

because when you met his eyes again, he stood.

in two strides he was in front of you, taking the laptop gently from your knees and setting it on the coffee table without a word. then he cupped your face with both hands and kissed you—deep, slow, and hungry. there was nothing tentative about it. it wasn’t sweet or shy. it was possession, poured soft and molten through the shape of his mouth on yours. you sighed into it, hands gripping the front of his shirt, pulse thudding in your throat.

he pulled away just enough to speak, voice rough. “don’t tease me about this.”

you nodded, breathless. “okay.”

and then he kissed you again.

the kiss tasted like all the things you weren’t allowed to say out loud. frustration. longing. the ache of pretending, day after day, that you were only what the world let you be. his thumb stroked your jaw as his mouth opened against yours, deeper now, slower. you felt your knees weaken and your thoughts scatter, all logic melting into the heat of the moment.

that night, like every night since the start of your secret, you met him outside the office. his car waited at the edge of the lot, tinted windows and the soft thump of quiet music playing through the speakers. you slid into the passenger seat, your heart already dancing.

this time, he didn’t say hello.

he reached over and kissed you—harder than before, lips parting yours in a way that made your body sing. the car wasn’t moving. neither of you were thinking. you kissed like it was all you knew how to do. mouths hungry, breath shallow, his hand tracing the edge of your thigh just enough to make you gasp. every time you pulled away for air, he followed. every time he groaned into your kiss, you shivered.

he never rushed.

never crossed that line you hadn’t yet spoken about.

but you felt how close it hovered. just under the skin.

and as your lips brushed his one last time before pulling back, your forehead resting against his, you whispered, “i like it when you get jealous.”

his smile was crooked. dangerous.

“you better not like it too much,” he said, his thumb stroking the corner of your mouth, “because next time… i might not let you leave so easily.”

thursday crept in quietly, with no big plans or messages of anticipation. the city, usually loud and hungry for excitement, felt unusually tame that week—like it had spent itself on too many events, too many evenings out, too many people chasing novelty in crowded cafés and rooftop bars. maybe it was just you, though. maybe everything had started to feel dull because your world had shifted to revolve around something—someone—entirely new. and nothing outside of that circle could compare anymore.

you barely spent time in your apartment lately. always out. always in his car, in places that weren’t quite home but felt more real because he was there. so on that afternoon, with your head tilted against the cold surface of your desk and your brain spinning from spreadsheets, you blurted it out between quiet keyboard taps.

“don’t make any plans tomorrow night.”

jaehyun glanced at you from across his office, pen in hand, eyebrows drawn. “should i be worried?”

you smiled without looking up. “you’re staying over. the weekend. at my place.”

the pause was heavy. not uncomfortable, but... loaded. you didn’t dare lift your head until he spoke.

“wait—what?”

and there it was. you looked at him finally, biting your bottom lip to keep from smiling too wide. he looked stunned. genuinely caught off guard.

“you heard me. pack a bag. pajamas. toothbrush. snacks. i don’t know. whatever you need to survive two days with me.”

his face went red. a deep, rich pink that spread across his cheeks to the tips of his ears. you laughed. he was thinking things.

“ya, what were you imagining?” you teased, narrowing your eyes at him with a smirk.

“nothing!” he defended too fast. “i just... i didn’t expect we’d be spending the weekend... alone like that. it’s not a bad thing. i like it. i like the idea. i just—i mean, we’ve been doing great. this relationship. it feels good. real. and... if it keeps going like this, who knows—maybe one day we’ll get married.”

you froze.

he didn’t say it as a joke. it was quiet. casual. but he meant it.

married.

you hadn’t thought about that in weeks. you’d been so swept up in the rush of the new—new glances, new kisses, new secret dates and stolen evenings. but that word made your heart skip, stumble, leap. it opened a future you hadn’t dared imagine.

married to jeong jaehyun. walking down an aisle. your coworkers gasping. your parents trying to stay calm. him lifting your veil. kissing you like it was the beginning of forever. sunday mornings with kids and cartoons and coffee. vacations. shared bookshelves. him waiting at the door when you got home.

you shook the image out of your head.

“you can’t just say things like that,” you whispered, barely breathing.

“why not?” he asked softly, his eyes sincere. “it’s where we’re going, right?”

friday night came like a slow exhale.

he arrived with a small black duffle bag slung over his shoulder and a sheepish grin. you wore mismatched pajamas—striped pants and a faded hoodie from a school club you barely remembered joining. the sight of you like that made him laugh, and the sound was so unguarded it made your chest ache with affection.

you stayed in. ordered too much food. picked a cheesy rom-com that made you cry halfway through. he kept making sarcastic comments at first, trying to pretend he didn’t care, until somewhere in the middle he got quiet. his hand found yours under the blanket, warm and steady. when the credits rolled, your head was on his shoulder and your eyes were puffy.

“i hate that you made me cry,” you sniffled, wiping your face.

“i didn’t make you cry. blame julia roberts,” he said, kissing the top of your head.

the rest of the night blurred. an improvised dinner of instant noodles and wine, soft music from your phone speaker, him dancing stupidly in the kitchen with a wooden spoon, trying to make you laugh. and you did. hard. the kind of laugh that made you forget to be careful.

when it got late, and the lights dimmed, the kisses came back. slow. long. searching. his hands on your waist, your fingers in his hair, breathing each other in like you were afraid to stop. the heat built, like always, but neither of you pushed further. it wasn’t time. not yet. but god, it was close.

saturday was lazy and warm and beautiful.

you woke up tangled in the blankets, his arm draped over your stomach, his breath soft against your neck. the kind of morning you never thought you’d get to have—where nothing was urgent, and everything felt right.

you took turns in the shower, argued over who finished the milk, and spent an hour sitting on the floor flipping through old photo albums you’d forgotten you had. you didn’t plan to show him—but he insisted. and once he started looking, he didn’t stop.

“wait... this is you in high school?” he asked, pointing at a photo.

“yeah,” you said, embarrassed. “why?”

“you were so cute.”

you rolled your eyes. “i wasn’t popular or anything. i had one boyfriend. lasted a week.”

he stared. “a week?”

“he said i was too uptight and boring.”

jaehyun’s mouth dropped open. “that guy was an idiot.”

you laughed. “no, he was probably right. i’ve always been... structured. controlled. even back then. guess that’s why i’m like this now—such a workaholic.”

he didn’t laugh. instead, he kept looking at your photo—finger brushing over the glossy paper like it meant something.

“if i had met you back then,” he said quietly, “i would’ve fallen in love with you. no doubt.”

your breath caught.

he didn’t look away. “i wouldn’t have let you go. not for a second.”

“you don’t mean that,” you whispered, unsure what else to say.

“i do,” he said, firm. “you’re not boring. you’re brilliant. you’re thoughtful. you see things no one else sees. you work harder than anyone i know. and... you make me want to be better.”

tears pricked your eyes again. not from sadness. just—too much emotion. too much truth.

“you’re going to make me cry again,” you whispered.

“then cry,” he said, pulling you close. “but only if you let me hold you through it.”

the rest of the weekend passed like a dream.

grocery runs in sweatpants. a half-burnt attempt at making pancakes. arguments over which playlist was better for cleaning the kitchen. you wore ridiculous socks with cartoons on them. he made fun of you until you found his even worse ones.

you kissed between chores. kissed while brushing your teeth. kissed while folding laundry.

it wasn’t glamorous.

but it felt like home.

and when sunday night came, and he packed his bag again, you didn’t want him to go. not because of the sex, or the thrill, or the high of newness. but because somewhere between instant noodles and high school photos, you realized something terrifying and beautiful—

you were falling in love.

for real.

for the first time.

towards the end of the month, your phone rings. you’re in your apartment, folding laundry with the window cracked open to let in the soft breeze of early summer. the sunlight filters through sheer curtains, painting everything in golden hues. you glance at the caller id and feel a knot tighten in your stomach. mom.

you answer.

“it’s your father’s birthday this weekend,” she says, skipping greetings as always, her voice a mix of cheerful anticipation and subtle reprimand. “you should come visit. he’s been asking if we’ll see you.”

you agree, almost without thinking, but then comes the dreaded question.

“and? have you found a boyfriend yet or do i need to talk to mrs. lee again?”

you rub your temple. “mom—”

“her son is still single, you know. owns a good piece of land. sells vegetables to that big food corporation. you’d be set for life.”

you exhale deeply, eyes closing in frustration.

“i’m… i’m seeing someone.”

a pause. then her voice lights up like fireworks. “you are? oh, this is wonderful! finally, you’re not wasting away alone up there in that office job.”

“mom, we’ve just started seeing each other,” you say, hesitating. “it’s too soon to—”

“no,” she cuts in firmly. “you don’t have time to be unsure. the train is about to leave the station, sweetheart. you either get on or it’s gone. bring him. we want to meet him.”

before you can argue, the call ends with a clipped goodbye, and you’re left staring at your phone, pulse racing and chest tight.

the rest of the week, you feel like a ghost of yourself. distracted at work, distant on your dates with jaehyun, your mind spinning in loops. he notices immediately—of course he does—and it only takes one missed joke and a quiet dinner for him to call you out on it.

you’re sitting across from him, poking at your food. the restaurant is softly lit, cozy, but there’s a distance in your eyes.

“y/n,” he says, setting his chopsticks down. “what’s going on?”

“nothing,” you mutter, but he leans in.

“don’t give me that. we’re together now, remember? you can talk to me. or… if you’re second guessing this… if i’m moving too fast, just tell me. i can handle it.”

your heart aches at his words. you reach across the table, grabbing his hand.

“it’s not that. i’m not doubting us,” you say quietly. “it’s just… my mom called. she wants me to visit this weekend for my dad’s birthday. and she… kind of expects me to bring you.”

he blinks. then, without hesitation, he says, “okay. then i’ll come.”

you blink right back. “wait, seriously?”

“yes. if it means that much to them—and to you—I want to go. i want to meet your family, y/n. it feels right.”

your chest swells with something warm and terrifying. you nod, silently.

friday comes and your suitcase is zipped and ready by the door. you’re wearing a floral summer dress, light and breezy, with your favorite pair of nude heels that make your legs look longer than they are. your hair is pinned loosely, lip tint soft and rosy. there’s a nervous flutter in your chest when you step outside.

jaehyun is already waiting beside his car, leaning casually against it like he belongs in a photoshoot. he’s in cream linen pants and a sage green button-down with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, collar open at the throat. his sunglasses reflect the afternoon sun, and he looks, frankly, too good to be standing in your quiet little street. you gulp.

“need help with those?” he says with a grin, reaching for your bags before you can answer.

the ride is filled with music, laughter, and long, thoughtful silences. the kind that don't feel awkward, but full. pregnant with meaning. he holds your hand on the highway, thumb stroking the back of it lazily, his warmth anchoring you through your nerves.

when you pull up to your parents' house—a modest home with stone finishings and a neat little front garden—your heart thunders. everything feels smaller, more fragile, like stepping back in time. your mom rushes out first, apron still tied around her waist, eyes wide and wet with excitement.

and when she sees jaehyun? she nearly cries. “you’re real,” she says, pressing her hands together like she’s witnessing a miracle. your dad comes out next, chuckling as he wipes his hands on a dish towel.

“so this is the young man,” he says with a knowing nod, clapping jaehyun on the back. “your mother hasn’t shut up about you since she found out.”

inside, the dining table is set with your dad’s favorite dishes. everything smells like memory. you sit in the living room afterward, your parents across from you, jaehyun beside you on the couch, close enough to feel his knee brushing yours.

he speaks up first, voice calm and clear.

“i just want to say that i’m very serious about your daughter,” he says. “i have genuine intentions. we’re still getting to know each other, but… if things keep going the way they are, i’d like to build a future with her.”

your mother gasps, reaching for a tissue. your father nods slowly, visibly moved.

“this… this is the best birthday gift i could ask for,” he says.

you shrink into the couch, cheeks burning, while jaehyun’s hand finds yours again and squeezes gently.

then comes the chaos.

your older brother, baekhyun, bursts through the door with his wife and two kids in tow. he takes one look at you and smirks.

“who’s the guy and what have you done with my perpetually single little sister?”

you groan. “shut up, baek.”

the two of you bicker like teenagers, tossing playful insults back and forth while your nephews cling to your legs, shouting your name with delight. you hand them the toys you brought and their eyes light up like it’s christmas.

jaehyun watches it all, amused, until one of the boys climbs into his lap and hands him a toy too.

he freezes.

and in that moment, something shifts in him. the sound of children’s laughter, the image of you with a soft smile, cradling one of your nephews in your arms. the warmth of this home, the love in every corner. he imagines it—having this with you. kids with your eyes. a house that’s yours. your framed wedding photo on the wall. vacations. birthdays. late-night talks in bed. wrinkles and silver hair, but still loving you with the same fire.

he blushes.

and you notice.

“what?” you whisper as you lean close.

he shakes his head, smiling to himself. “nothing. just… i really, really like this. all of it.”

the night unfolds gently. dinner turns into stories, stories into laughter, and soon the sun has long set and the house is lit with warm yellow lights. you and jaehyun sit outside for a moment, watching the stars.

he wraps an arm around you, and you rest your head on his shoulder.

“you feel like home,” you whisper, not even realizing the words have slipped out.

he turns to look at you, eyes soft. “so do you.”

and in the quiet, with the cicadas singing and the echo of your family’s voices drifting from inside, you know.

this might just be the beginning of everything.

the month of july passed by with little to no complications. your parents were pleased with jaehyun, and you could tell that their approval meant the world to him. jungwoo, on the other hand, was playful and teasing, but with a newfound sense of respect, especially as jaehyun started to show more signs of being protective, making sure that jungwoo didn’t cross any boundaries. you were still professional with everyone at work, but the chemistry between you and jaehyun was undeniable. nights together were spent laughing, and weekends were filled with stolen moments of joy, where you both shared something more than just professional courtesy.

jaehyun had made a habit of calling you during the day, just to check on you, and you found yourself doing the same. the conversations were simple, but they felt important. visits to his office became more frequent, sometimes just for work, but other times, it was an excuse to sneak in a kiss or two. the passion between you two continued to build, a slow, steady fire that became increasingly hard to ignore.

one night, a wednesday, you both ignored the weather forecast and decided to take your date out in the city. the air was warm, and the lights of the city sparkled as you walked the streets together. the mood was light, but as midnight approached, the weather took a sharp turn. dark clouds rolled in, and soon, rain began to pour, turning into a violent storm. the wind howled, and the streets quickly flooded. jaehyun’s car struggled against the force of the water, and you couldn’t help but grip the seat, anxious.

jaehyun tried to keep calm, glancing at you with a reassuring smile. “it’s okay, nothing’s going to happen,” he said, though you could tell he was also feeling the weight of the storm.

the rain pounded against the windows, and the car barely moved as the currents began to grow stronger. after what felt like an eternity, you both agreed that waiting in the car wasn’t safe anymore. as you both discussed where to go, a motel appeared in front of you. it seemed like an odd choice, but the parking lot was dry, and there were few other options at that hour. both of you hesitated, unsure of what to do. it was a strange situation—neither of you wanted to suggest anything that could be misinterpreted.

jaehyun was the one to break the silence. “let’s just use the parking lot, at least we’ll have shelter from the rain,” he said. “and if it lasts all night, we’ll have a warm place to stay.”

you nodded, a little nervous. “yeah, i mean, we’re not going to do anything else, right? just sleep, then in the morning, we’ll head back to our places and go to work, right?”

jaehyun smiled at you, trying to ease your nerves. “of course, just a safe place to wait out the storm. no pressure.”

you both parked and got out of the car, a little stiff from the tension, but the moment you entered the motel, things started to feel different. jaehyun took the lead, making sure you were comfortable and settled in, giving you space to breathe. He didn’t rush you, always checking to see how you felt.

both of you were tired from the day, and the weather didn’t help the situation, so after some brief, awkward glances, you both decided to take separate showers to unwind. you both changed into something more comfortable, but since it was summer and it was warm, you decided to just sleep in your underwear. when you looked at jaehyun in his, the moment felt almost surreal. his gaze lingered for a moment before he quickly turned away, as if both of you were still trying to adjust to how close you had become.

“you know,” he said softly, his voice breaking the silence, “you don’t have to feel awkward. we’re taking things at our own pace.”

you smiled, feeling your heartbeat quicken at the sound of his voice. “what if i want to go faster?” you said, your words surprising even yourself.

jaehyun looks at you, eyes widening slightly before they darken with something deeper—something he’s clearly been holding back. “are you sure?” he asks, voice low, almost trembling with restraint.

you nod, stepping closer, your fingers brushing against his bare chest. “i’m sure.”

his hands find your waist gently at first, testing the waters, but when you lean into him, he pulls you in like he’s been waiting forever to hold you like this. his lips find yours in a kiss that starts soft, exploratory, but quickly deepens, hungry and needing. he walks you backwards slowly until the back of your knees hit the bed, and you fall onto it with a soft gasp, taking him with you.

his hands roam your body, reverent and slow, like he’s memorizing every inch of you. he whispers your name against your skin, trailing kisses down your neck, over your collarbone, and lower still. your breath hitches when his mouth lingers between your thighs, his eyes meeting yours, waiting for any sign to stop—but you nod again, your fingers threading into his hair, guiding him closer.

what he gives you isn’t rushed. it’s worship. like he’s been dreaming of this moment for too long to waste it. you lose yourself in the rhythm of his mouth, the way he listens to your body, adjusting, teasing, giving. he doesn’t stop until your thighs are shaking and your voice is broken with moans you couldn’t hold back.

when he finally crawls back up your body, his lips kiss yours again, slower this time, tasting you. he whispers, “still okay?” and you nod, pulling him closer.

when he slides into you, it’s not hurried or careless. it’s deep, slow, and overwhelming in the best way. you cling to him, breathless, as your bodies move together like they were made to. he holds your gaze, foreheads pressed together, sweat-damp skin sticking in the summer heat, but neither of you care.

you whisper his name like a prayer, and he answers with yours, over and over, like he’s trying to brand it into the moment.

you fall apart in his arms, not once, but twice, and he follows soon after, burying his face in your neck as he trembles against you. 

his lips are still on yours when he pushes deeper inside you, and this time, there’s no hesitation. your body arches under him, the stretch of him delicious and overwhelming all at once. he fills you slowly, inch by inch, like he wants to feel every reaction he pulls from you.

“fuck, you feel so good,” he breathes out, forehead resting against yours. “been thinking about this for so long.”

you moan softly, nails dragging down his back as he starts to move, slow at first, rolling his hips into you with precision that makes your legs tremble. he kisses down your throat, biting softly at your skin as he picks up the pace, each thrust hitting deeper, harder. the headboard taps gently against the wall, a quiet rhythm that matches the sound of your breathy moans and his soft, low groans.

your fingers clutch the sheets, the pleasure building with every thrust. jaehyun’s hands grip your thighs, spreading you wider for him, and the new angle has you gasping his name, your voice breaking. he doesn’t stop—he can’t stop—lost in the feel of you, the sounds you make, the way your body clings to his like it’s the only place it belongs.

he pulls out just enough to see the way you take him, watching your slick coat his length before sliding back in with a filthy, wet sound that makes your toes curl. “look at you,” he murmurs, his thumb brushing your lower lip, eyes locked on yours. “so fucking beautiful like this.”

when he shifts, propping one of your legs over his shoulder, the angle has you crying out, your whole body shuddering. “you’re so deep,” you whimper, and he groans, hips snapping faster, harder, chasing both your highs like a man starved.

your climax hits hard—white-hot and blinding—as your walls clamp down around him, dragging him over the edge with you. he cums with a strangled moan, burying himself to the hilt, his hips stuttering as he spills into you. he stays there, chest pressed to yours, breathing heavy, hearts pounding in sync.

after a few moments, he pulls out slowly, carefully, kissing your shoulder as he lies beside you and pulls you into his arms.

your body’s still trembling when he runs a hand down your spine, voice low and thick with affection. “think we’re still just sleeping?”

you laugh softly against his chest, lazy fingers tracing circles on his skin. “not a chance.”

he kisses the top of your head. “then let’s not sleep yet.”

and before you can even respond, he’s already kissing down your body again—because one round clearly wasn’t enough.

you barely have time to catch your breath before jaehyun’s mouth is back on your skin, trailing open-mouthed kisses down your chest, between your breasts, over your stomach. his hands roam your thighs with greedy fingers, and even though you’re still sensitive, your body responds instantly—needy, aching, already ready for him again.

“you’re still so wet,” he murmurs, spreading you open with his fingers, dragging two of them slowly through your folds. “fuck, baby… you’re dripping.”

your hips jerk when he circles your clit, light and teasing, and you whine, fingers gripping the sheets. “j-jaehyun…”

he smirks, dark eyes meeting yours as he sinks his fingers into you—slow, deep, curling just right. “you can take it, can’t you?” he says, voice thick with lust. “you want it again.”

you nod helplessly, mouth parted as your back arches off the bed. he fucks you with his fingers until you’re trembling again, begging for him, grinding down onto his hand like you can’t get enough—and you can’t.

when he pulls his fingers out and lines himself up again, there’s no patience this time. he pushes in all at once, rougher, deeper, making your breath catch in your throat. the stretch, the pressure, the heat—it’s almost too much, but you crave every second of it.

he fucks you like he owns you now, one hand on your hip, the other pressing down on your stomach so he can feel himself inside you. “you feel that?” he groans. “you’re taking all of me.”

your moans turn shameless, high-pitched and raw, the wet slap of skin on skin echoing in the room with every thrust. the bed creaks, the headboard pounds against the wall, and you don’t care who hears. he flips you onto your stomach without warning, pulling your hips up, and slides back into you from behind.

you cry out at the new angle, your hands clawing at the sheets as he drives into you, deeper than before. “god—jaehyun, i’m gonna—”

“cum for me,” he growls, grabbing your hair and pulling your head back to kiss the side of your neck. “cum all over my cock, baby.”

your orgasm hits like a shockwave, blinding and hot and overwhelming. your whole body shakes, legs giving out beneath you as he keeps fucking you through it. he follows moments later, groaning your name as he fills you again, hips jerking against your ass, the sound of it all so filthy and perfect.

this time, when you collapse together on the bed, everything is soaked in sweat and heat and the scent of sex. your body is limp, your mind dazed, and he just pulls you close, wrapping you in his arms like he’s never letting go.

“okay,” you whisper, laughing breathlessly. “now we might need to sleep.”

he chuckles against your hair, voice rough. “maybe. after round three.”

that night at the motel changed everything.

it wasn’t just the sex—though, god, it was incredible. it was the way his hands learned your body like a second language, the way he whispered your name like a secret, the way you both let yourselves fall without fear. that night was messy, breathless, and soaked in want. but more than anything, it was a turning point—a quiet, unspoken agreement that this was no longer just something casual. not for either of you.

after that, the line between love and lust blurred beautifully. sex became part of your rhythm, part of how you communicated. stolen glances in the office turned into stolen kisses in the elevator. late nights became sleepovers, and every morning-after was filled with lazy touches and knowing smiles. you memorized each other’s moans like favorite songs, found new ways to say i want you, even when the words themselves weren’t spoken.

but there was one night that stood out. the one you still think about more than any other.

it was the night you stayed over at his apartment—just the two of you, no distractions, no storms outside, only the slow burn between your bodies. dinner turned into kisses. kisses turned into the first round on his kitchen counter, then the second in the shower, steam fogging up the mirror as your bodies tangled and slipped together like water and flame.

by the third round, it was past midnight. you were already sore, breathless, but insatiable. he pulled you back into bed, whispering things in your ear that made your skin burn. he was rougher that time—hungrier—gripping your hips as he fucked you deep and slow, drawing out every moan until your voice was hoarse and your mind was gone.

you were on top, riding him with lazy, desperate rhythm, your head thrown back, your nails digging into his chest. he looked up at you like you were something divine, his hands guiding your pace, eyes locked on the place where your bodies met.

and just when your orgasm started to hit—when everything went hot and tight and unbearably good—the words slipped out of you.

“i love you.”

your voice cracked around it, high and trembling, your body still grinding against his, your climax crashing over you like a wave. for a split second, everything stopped. you felt him freeze beneath you, heard the sharp intake of breath, saw the shock in his eyes.

you hadn’t meant to say it like that. not in the middle of fucking. not when you were bare in every sense of the word.

it was reckless. vulnerable. raw.

but not wrong.

his hands gripped your waist tighter, and then he was sitting up, arms wrapping around you, thrusting up into you so hard and deep that you sobbed out his name.

“i love you too,” he groaned against your neck. “fuck, i love you so much—too much.”

and then he came—hard and fast, holding you like he never wanted to let go.

afterward, you just lay there on top of him, chest to chest, skin to skin, hearts pounding in unison. there was no awkwardness. no regret. only this strange, beautiful calm that settled over the room like dawn.

it was in that moment you realized just how deep your feelings for him ran.

what had started as a simple plan—just something to avoid growing old alone—had become the best part of your life. somewhere along the way, between the office visits and shared glances, motel rooms and quiet mornings, you had fallen hopelessly, madly in love with jaehyun.

and the craziest part?

you couldn’t imagine ever thinking of anything—or anyone—else but him.

august wrapped around you like a golden ribbon, thick with heat and filled with the kind of breathless anticipation that only comes after months of hard work. the project was done—finally—after weeks of stress, endless reports, last-minute corrections and late nights. but it was done. and not just done, but successful. glowing feedback, client satisfaction, numbers that sang. it was more than you had dared to hope for.

and then—the email.

subject line: promotion confirmation.

you stared at it for a full minute before opening it. and when you read the words “congratulations, supervisor,” your breath hitched. you covered your mouth. you gasped. and then you ran.

jaehyun wasn’t even at his desk anymore, he was just walking into the hallway when you caught him. “jaehyun!” you called, your voice trembling with a kind of joy that had nowhere to go.

he turned, concerned for half a second—until he saw your face. and then you said it.

“i got it.”

“you got what?” he blinked, confused.

“the promotion.”

his eyes widened. he froze for a second. and then—his arms were around you before you could even finish breathing. he lifted you, spinning you once, twice, both of you laughing as you clutched his shoulders and buried your face in his neck.

“oh my god, baby—you did it! i knew it, i knew you would!”

you were dizzy, and not just from the spinning. he kissed your cheek, your temple, your lips. everything was warm and golden and right.

he took you out that night.

you didn’t go anywhere fancy—jaehyun insisted that celebrations should be personal, not performative. so he drove you to that one little pizzeria you loved, the one that made the potato crust just the way you liked it. he ordered your usual without asking, and when the wine came, he raised his glass first.

“to you,” he said, his eyes soft and gleaming under the low light. “my brilliant, unstoppable, incredible woman.”

your heart swelled so fast it almost ached. the clink of your glasses felt like the sound of a new chapter opening.

“i’ve never had this before,” you confessed, fingers curling around the stem of your glass. “celebrating something this big. with someone i love. it feels…” you laughed, shy and overwhelmed. “it feels like everything’s different now.”

jaehyun reached for your hand, his thumb stroking the back of it slowly.

“it is different,” he said. “because now, every good thing that happens to you—we get to celebrate it. together.”

you stared at him, your chest tight with emotion, with the kind of love that had no bottom, no edge. just more.

you leaned across the table, kissing him slow, deep, grateful. pizza between you, wine in your veins, your laughter echoing off the walls of that tiny booth.

you didn’t need fireworks.

this was better.

this was yours.

mid-september arrived with a softness that clung to the air—warm enough to feel like summer still lingered, but mellowed by the early hints of fall. the leaves hadn’t turned yet, but something in the wind carried change. maybe that’s what had been stirring inside you all week—a restless certainty that had taken root in your chest and bloomed with every kiss, every sleepy morning wrapped around each other, every whispered i love you that escaped your lips without hesitation. it had been five months, five months of chaos and clarity, of fire and softness, and you knew now—you didn’t want to wait anymore.

you wanted jaehyun. not in a month. not after careful plans. now.

so you climbed the steps to his office, heart thudding like a war drum, nerves tangled with determination. you paused outside the door, breathed once, twice, and knocked.

“come in,” his voice called, muffled behind the heavy door.

you stepped in and found him at his desk, back slightly hunched, focused on the glow of his screen. he looked up, and the moment he saw you, he smiled—that slow, dazzling smile that always made your knees feel like melted wax—and stood immediately, walking toward you without hesitation. he cupped your face, leaned in, and kissed you like he’d been waiting to do it all day.

“jaehyun,” you said, voice almost trembling, more from the gravity of what you were about to say than nerves. he pulled back slightly, tilting his head.

“yeah?”

you met his eyes and, without giving yourself the chance to second-guess it, you let it fall from your lips.

“i want to marry you.”

his lips parted slightly, surprise flickering across his features. he blinked, as if trying to be sure he heard you right.

“i know, baby,” he said, a soft chuckle lacing his words. “that was the whole deal, right? but remember—we said after november. we’d have more time to plan, get everything ready—”

“no,” you interrupted, stepping forward, clutching his hands tightly. “i don’t want to wait till november. i mean it. i want to marry you now. today, tomorrow, next week—i don’t care when or how. i just want to be yours. forever.”

he stared at you, quiet. processing. his brows drew together, and then lifted again like the meaning had just landed fully. his hands gripped yours tighter.

“but—what about the wedding? your parents, mine—”

“we’ll figure it out,” you whispered. “but this... this love we have, i don’t want to keep treating it like something that needs to be scheduled. it’s real. it’s now.”

he took a breath, deep and full. and then, his expression softened into something vulnerable and glowing—his eyes shone with something deeper than just affection. he leaned his forehead against yours and whispered, “you want to be my wife.”

you nodded, lips brushing his as you breathed, “more than anything.”

his thumbs brushed over your cheeks, as if committing this moment to memory. “then we’ll do it. not because it’s rushed, but because we know. we’ve known. and if you want to be my wife now... then i’ll make it happen. we’ll get married. i promise.”

and he kissed you again, this time slower, as if sealing an oath between your mouths.

the proposal happened three days later.

he told you it was just a normal date—dinner, then a walk somewhere scenic. no pressure. he even played it off by wearing something casual: a white linen shirt, sleeves rolled, soft beige slacks, and the cleanest pair of loafers you’d ever seen. he looked devastatingly handsome without trying.

he picked you up and drove toward the edge of the city, toward the river trail where the summer festivals were usually held. the area was quiet now, early autumn having driven the crowds away. but fairy lights still dangled from the trees, twinkling faintly as the sun dipped beneath the horizon, casting a warm, honeyed hue over everything.

he walked with you along the wooden path, your fingers tangled. his hand was slightly clammy. you noticed, and your heart fluttered, thinking—he’s nervous. the realization made you giddy.

and then, just as you reached the little bridge that overlooked the water, he stopped.

“wait here,” he said softly, squeezing your hand. “don’t move.”

he jogged a few steps ahead, ducked behind a low fence near a cluster of trees, and returned with a bouquet of peonies—your favorite. you hadn’t told him that. he remembered.

your eyes began to water.

he handed them to you, smiling shyly, and then pulled something out of his pocket.

a velvet box.

he opened it without a speech, without fanfare. his voice was soft, his eyes locked on yours like the world outside didn’t exist.

“you already said yes,” he whispered. “but i want to do this right.”

he got down on one knee, the gravel crunching beneath him, and held the ring up.

“y/n, will you marry me—not next month, not in theory, not in some future we’re still trying to picture... but now. for real. because i’m yours. and you’re mine.”

you didn’t cry. you sobbed. like an idiot. like a girl who had waited her whole life for someone like him. you nodded so fast your vision blurred and fell into his arms, and he kissed you like he was promising you the rest of forever.

in that moment, september never felt sweeter.

telling the company was a whole thing.

it started with a scheduled meeting—a weekly operations check-in with the usual suspects: team leads, upper management, the supervisor, and a couple of sharp-eyed executives who never missed a detail. it was jaehyun’s idea to make it official at work, to do it clean and direct and proudly. no rumors. no hiding. just the truth, glowing and solid like the ring that now lived permanently on your finger.

you both walked into the meeting room together, which wasn’t unusual, but something in the way your hands brushed as you took your seat already had jungwoo giving you the side-eye.

the presentation started, charts and projections lighting up the screen behind jaehyun as he stood with calm confidence. it was business as usual—until the last slide.

"before we wrap up," he said, glancing back at the room, his eyes finding yours briefly before turning to the group again, "i have one personal announcement to make."

you swallowed. jungwoo leaned forward like a damn hawk. mr. choi narrowed his eyes suspiciously, as if he'd been waiting for this moment since spring.

jaehyun smiled—soft, boyish, unbothered. “as some of you may know… or have guessed," he said, and gave jungwoo a teasing look that made him gasp, "i knew it," he muttered dramatically—"y/n and i have been seeing each other for a while.”

the room exploded. a gasp from the secretary and the supervisor actually choked on his coffee. someone in the back whispered “what the fuck” under their breath.

jaehyun held up a hand, a little smug, a little amused.

“and, as of last weekend… we’re engaged.”

your cheeks were burning. your heart thundered. you expected chaos, maybe disapproval, but what followed was—

cheering. clapping. wide eyes and stunned smiles. even mr. choi looked like he was trying very hard not to grin.

“you’re marrying jaehyun? our jaehyun?” he blinked at her, then looked at jaehyun like he’d just discovered a double life. “okay, i knew something was going on. i’m not blind. but marriage? dude, that’s insane. like, insane in the good way, but—holy shit.”

you stood up, feeling brave. “we just didn’t want to hide it anymore,” you said. “we’re really happy. and we hope you’ll be happy for us too.”

the room burst into applause again. someone shouted, “wedding invites or we riot!”

the parents came next.

you visited your family first. your mom opened the door and immediately noticed the ring. she gasped, dropped the dish towel she was holding, and squealed in that way only mothers can. within seconds, your dad was there too, grinning, eyes glossy, holding jaehyun’s shoulder like he was already part of the family.

"are you kidding me," your mom kept saying. "you're engaged? oh my god, you're engaged!"

you nodded, trying not to cry as she hugged you so tight it hurt.

“he’s everything i ever wanted for you,” your dad told you quietly, before giving jaehyun a very serious handshake. “you take care of her.”

“always,” jaehyun promised, voice thick with sincerity.

then it was his parents' turn.

you were more nervous, but you shouldn’t have been. the moment jaehyun’s mom saw you, she pulled you into a hug, muttering in korean how beautiful you were, how she’d been praying her son would be smart enough to not let you go. his dad was more reserved, but the sparkle in his eye said everything. when jaehyun said, “we’re getting married,” his mother clapped her hands and screamed like she’d just won the lottery.

“we’re so happy,” she said, eyes shining. “you are already family.”

they brought out food, wine, photos from jaehyun’s childhood. his mom made you take home a tupperware of kimchi and a crocheted doily she claimed she made for whoever he married one day. she said she just had a feeling it was going to be you, and jaehyun turned red.

it turned out that weddings—real weddings—took a lot more time to plan than y/n had expected. even with jaehyun’s calming presence and the help of a surprisingly competent wedding planner, the months passed like petals falling from a tree: softly, quickly, too beautifully to hold onto.

they settled on march 28. it gave them just enough time to breathe, to build, to dream together.

from the moment they told everyone—first their friends, then their families, and finally, in a hilariously formal email, the entire company—the whirlwind began. the announcement caused a stir so loud in the office that y/n had to leave her desk just to get some peace.

the directivos were equally shocked, though mostly amused. her supervisor just nodded sagely, like he’d been betting on this since the beginning.

“you two were always ‘too in sync’,” he said, raising his coffee mug in mock toast. “i give it six months before one of you becomes the other's boss at home too.”

and then came the parents.

jaehyun’s mother cried when she met y/n, tears slipping down her cheeks as she hugged her tight and whispered in korean, “you’re even more beautiful than he said. and i knew he was in love the first time he said your name.”

her own parents, after recovering from the initial shock, became obsessively involved in the planning, sending flower samples, playlist suggestions, and opinions on wedding favors at all hours of the day. but none of it was overwhelming. not with jaehyun there, always pulling her back into calm. always making sure this was their wedding, not anyone else’s.

they chose a venue outside the city—a small vineyard with soft hills, blooming wisteria, and golden light that melted everything it touched. march 28 arrived with the scent of earth and lilac, a warm wind, and the sky so blue it almost hurt to look at.

y/n stood before a mirror in a white gown that made her feel like everything good in the world had been sewn together just for her. she could hear the quiet rustle of guests arriving, the soft music playing in the distance, the laughter of children running between the rows of flowers.

and then, jaehyun.

when she saw him waiting at the altar, dressed in a suit that fit like second skin, with his hair slightly tousled and a look in his eyes that could undo galaxies—she forgot how to breathe.

he mouthed “you’re perfect” as she walked down the aisle.

she mouthed “you’re mine.”

the ceremony was intimate, emotional, wrapped in vows that made everyone cry—even jungwoo, who tried to play it off by pretending he had allergies.

“i promise to protect your dreams as fiercely as my own,” jaehyun said, voice trembling slightly, “and to always make sure your pizza has the right amount of potato crust, even when we’re eighty.”

“i promise to choose you, even on the days we forget how lucky we are,” y/n replied, tears in her eyes. “and to never let the fire between us die, even when we’re old and gray.”

they kissed.

and the world felt new again.

their first dance was under strings of fairy lights, barefoot on the grass. the song was soft, a slow jazz tune that jaehyun had played for her once in the car when she’d been crying. now, with her head against his chest, they swayed like the wind had been made just for them.

“we did it,” she whispered.

“we did,” he said. “and i’d marry you again tomorrow if i could.”

the honeymoon came a few days later. they chose santorini, greece, not for the postcard beauty or luxury, but because y/n had once told him, offhandedly, that she always dreamed of watching the sun melt into the sea from a white rooftop. he remembered.

their suite was perched on a cliff, overlooking the caldera, with white walls and blue domes and windows that opened to eternity. the first night, they sat on the balcony with a bottle of wine, their feet touching, their hands always searching for each other.

they kissed under sunsets and made love under stars. they danced in narrow streets, shared kisses between sips of ouzo, fed each other olives and sweet baklava. they were ridiculous. and in love. and utterly themselves.

“this is the life i want,” y/n whispered one night, tangled in cotton sheets, her cheek against his chest.

“then it’s the life we’ll have,” jaehyun said. “forever.”

and this time, forever didn’t sound like a fairytale.

it sounded like a promise.

three years passed like chapters in a love letter—written slowly, lived fully.

you and jaehyun made a home out of a sleek little apartment tucked into the rhythm of the city. it was all black wood and soft gray, velvet cushions and open windows where sunlight poured in like gold. it wasn’t big, but it held your whole world. your toothbrushes leaned against each other. your shoes tangled by the door. your laughter lived in the walls.

mornings were sleepy and soft—coffee mugs clinking, your legs wrapped around his under the kitchen table, newspaper pages ignored in favor of each other’s eyes. nights were even softer—blankets twisted around you, movie soundtracks playing in the background while your fingers danced across his skin. the kind of love that didn’t need grand gestures—just the warmth of his palm on your thigh and the way he said “come here” like home itself.

but then, one evening, the quiet changed.

you were in the bathroom. pacing. heart in your throat. your phone timer ticked like thunder in the silence. the test rested on the sink, small and still—like it held the weight of the universe. you sat on the edge of the tub, knees pulled up, trying to breathe.

when the timer stopped, you moved like you were underwater. slow. hesitant. scared.

two pink lines.

you stared. blinked. stared again.

your lips parted, the shape of a whisper you couldn’t form. your hands trembled, and for a moment, the whole world tilted—just you and that tiny piece of plastic and everything it now meant.

you stepped out of the bathroom, barefoot, holding the test like it might shatter.

jaehyun was on the couch, lounging with his phone, one leg bent lazily, hair tousled from running his hand through it too many times. he looked up. paused. frowned softly. “baby… what is it?”

you didn’t answer right away. just walked toward him—slow, like the floor might disappear—and placed the test in his hand.

“we’re gonna be parents!!”

the silence cracked. and then—

jaehyun surged forward, arms wrapping around you so tight you gasped. he lifted you off the ground, spinning you around the living room like a kid on christmas morning, laughter bursting from his chest, from yours, from some place deep inside where all the hope had been hiding.

you were both crying. laughing. kissing. saying “we did it!” over and over again like a prayer you never thought you’d get to say out loud. he pressed his forehead to yours, voice shaking, “we’re having a baby.”

“we’re having our baby,” you whispered.

months passed like petals falling from a blooming tree.

you were glowing. exhausted, but glowing.

your blush-pink maternity dress clung gently to your growing belly, printed with tiny white florals that made jaehyun smile every time he saw you in it. your feet were bare, your ankles swollen, your back ached constantly—but he was always there, hands rubbing your spine, lips on your shoulder, whispering, “you’re magic, you know that?”

the nursery was nearly finished—lavender walls painted with care, gold stars twinkling on the ceiling, and a soft mobile that played lullabies like stardust. the crib waited, delicate and perfect, with a plush bunny nestled in the corner.

jaehyun was kneeling by the dresser, sweat on his brow, tongue between his teeth as he finished the final drawer. he looked up, eyes finding you immediately, and god—he looked at you like the whole sky lived inside your smile.

“she’s gonna love this room,” he said, standing to press a hand to your belly. his palm warm. grounding. full of quiet awe. “our little moon.”

you leaned into him, pressing a kiss to his jaw. “i hope she gets your eyes,” you whispered.

he smiled, eyes soft with wonder. “and your heart,” he murmured. “especially your heart.”

the room went quiet again—except for the soft hum of the mobile spinning slowly above the crib. gold stars turned, catching the light.

and in that moment, just one suspended, breathless moment, everything was still.

you. him. her.

and the love that built it all.

finally. completely.

beautifully yours.

[thewonandonly]

LONGING FOR YOU

PLAYLIST : spotify

PAIRING : pro-baseball player!jaehyun x fem!college student!reader

GENRE : fluff, smut

PROMPT : "if you were my little girl, i'd do whatever i could do, i'd run away and hide with you." au

WC : 15,323 words

WARNINGS : strong language, sports medicine student!reader, reader used to play volleyball, teeny tiny age gap (reader is early 20's, jaehyun is irl age), greek life, jaehyun is implied to be a (former) frat brother (never officially states it), frat party, drinking/alcohol, there is a mention of puke/vomit, mention of overstimulating setting, cameo by yeri :3, mark, and johnny, consent is sexy, protection is hot, lots and lots of praise, BRIEF locker room sexual tension bc i had to, ig it can be considered a kind of sugar daddy au?, jaehyun has no rizz 🗣️, penetration (f), oral (m + f),

AUTHOR'S NOTE : jaehyun military enlistment 😞 jerma helped me write this thats why it took so long. forgive me for the horrendous explicit scene i quite literally have not written full length smut in so long. and also, jaehyun jaehyun jaehyun jaehyun jaehyun jaehyun. :3 that's all.

DISCLAIMER : the characters in this story are to be allusions to real people, and none of the situations, personalities, and actions found here should reflect reality. this story was created with zero intention to violate the images of the artists.

"Come on, come to the party with me!" Yeri groaned, tugging on your arm as if you were her mother and she was your child begging for a toy.

You sighed, rubbing your temples, "I would love to, but I've got work I've gotta do." It was the seventh time — yes, all in one day — where Yeri has asked you to join her at this giant frat party that her friend, Johnny, who happened to be the RA where said party was being held, invited her to. She would've loved to go by herself, but she planned to consume insane amounts of alcohol and would require someone with wonderful bedside manner, i.e. you. 

Yeri groaned, throwing her head back dramatically, "All you do is do your homework." She complained, "I'm sure the wonderful science behind athletic medicine can wait for one night off."

"I'm sorry, Yeri, but my entire scholarship is riding on this." You mumbled, watching Yeri groaned louder, as her head moved forward, trudging her way out your bedroom doorway.

You would be ecstatic to go to some lame party down University Road. You'd love to get drunk, hook up with some dude who is looking to hit. You'd love to take a break, but, unfortunately, your life after you graduate was already starting. You had 29 thousand dollars and two internships invested in your future. If you wanted to be an accredited professional in athletic medicine, you'd have to focus, and not get distracted or discouraged. 

But, then again, you're still young. You're only getting closer to the end, and Yeri is busy with her cheerleading career. You'd rather not lose this connection. Glancing at the clock, you noticed as the second hand tick away, sighing softly. It was thirty to 12. The night was still young.

You turned in your chair, calling to her, a small laugh escaping your lips as she looked at you with eyes that looked as if she was a kicked puppy, "I'll go."

Her face immediately lit up and she smiled, "You will?"

You held up your hands in surrender, standing from your cluttered desk, "You're right, as much as I hate to admit it. The world of medicine can wait."

"I'm so happy right now." She cheered happily, "Okay, I'll let you get ready. I'll take a quick shower and everything." She turned the corner into the hallway and you heard the shower run.

Sighing, you opened your closet door and analyzed the clothes on the hangers. You didn't have any "sexy" outfits, so to speak. Everything was strictly professional clothing, especially considering you had your internships around the corner. But, who could show up to a frat party in high rise, flared dress pants? Maybe it was time to break out the clothes you packed right out of high school. 

Once you tore through the boxes, pulled on the clothes, you could swear they grew tighter, which was normal; you were still growing, in more areas than one. You opted for sticking to the items you chose, for the most risqué look, considering it was a frat party.

Yeri was quick to get in and out of the shower, quick to get her makeup done, and quick to get dressed. You're sure she was going to be quick to get out the door as well.

You leaned against the wall to pull on your shoes, watching Yeri immediately grow frazzled as she struggled to find her keys, which were normally in the catch bowl, but was strategically hug up on the key hook earlier for convenience. 

The trip to the Pi Phi house wasn't far, but the blistering cold wind bit at your nose and cheeks as you and Yeri both walked down the road from your apartment to the frat house.

You both turned the corner, your jaws opening in shock. 

The Pi Phi house was huge, damn near 3 floors. And much to your dismay, it wasn't a new brother of the house at the door, it was two sisters from the Kappa Omega Pi sorority. They seemed nice, letting in quite a few people, until they turned away another girl. 

You looked to Yeri, sighing softly, "I don't think we're gonna get in." The small queue was moving quickly.

Yeri rolled her eyes so far back you were sure they'd get stuck, "Relax. If they don't let us in, I've got an in." She rubbed her hands together, the cold chill in the air slowly building, "God, fuck! It's fucking cold."

"Just don't think about it. We're almost to the front." You mumbled, stepping forward up onto the porch, watching the girl's faces drop at the sight of you after letting two guys inside.

They gave the two of you a once over, exhaling a deep breath through their nose, "It's six bucks to get in."

Yeri pulled out her phone, scoffing, "That's not what it says on the flyer." She turned her phone to the girls, giving a smartalick smirk, "And, besides, I know Johnny." 

The girls looked at each other, chuckling, "You know Johnny?"

Yeri crossed her arms, motioning to the open front door of the frat house, "Go on. Go get him."

One of the girls stepped inside, and walked out in seconds, a tall male peeking his head out, pulling a face at the girl, "Come on, you're really asking if Yeri can come in?" He nodded his head to the two of you. 

Yeri smiled at the girls, waving to them before turning to you and speaking over the music that grew significantly louder as you walked through the crowded hallways, "Those girls were definitely not girls girls."

"Aren't the Kappa Omega Pi sisters like really tightknit with Pi Phi?" You responded, watching your temporary escort split off from the two of you.

"Yeah," Yeri sighed, "Let's not worry about them, though! Let's just have fun!" She immediately turned a corner and you found yourself by your lonesome, squeezing past people with small whispers of "Excuse me's" and "Sorry's" before you finally made your way into the kitchen where it wasn't as crowded, but was definitely still filled with a few people. Pi Phi brothers and Kappa Omega Pi sisters were lined up along a wall where they took pictures together to show their love for their greek life. Your hand moved to grab at a bottle of Michelob Ultra, pouring it into the cup while you stared at the group taking photos. Maybe a social outing wasn't the best idea, considering the setting. You weren't much of a—

"Hey." Someone reached over and set the glass bottle down on the counter, laughing softly, "Your cup." 

You tore your eyes away from where you were staring, glancing down at the cup filled with foam from the beer, "Oh." You mumbled softly, glancing up at the person who was kind enough to take the empty bottle from your hand, "Thanks."

You watched him dump out the foamy beer into the sink, grabbing another plastic cup and beer, slowly pouring it out in front of you, "Here." 

"Thanks." You mumbled out again, grabbing the cup from his outstretched hand. It was dim in the kitchen, much to your dismay, only a string of Christmas lights you weren't sure the brothers ever took down from the passing holiday. You squinted your eyes to try to get a glimpse at who this person was for pouring your drink out. "I recognize you from somewhere."

"Damn, dude, what's taking so long?" A voice spoke over your own, at a much louder octave. He patted the guy on his shoulder, "Gotta celebrate your big game tomorrow."

Your brows pinched together as you assessed the voice, "Mark?" You questioned, your eyes squinting more, almost blinded by your lashes.

The shorter male turned to look at you, "Woah, Y/N, bro, I didn't even know you were here!" He smiled, laughing out loud, "What's up?" He asked.

"You're Pi Phi?" You asked him, waving awkwardly at him, "I didn't know you were part of the greek life."

"I didn't know you were either." Mark laughed again, "Bro, that's crazy. I didn't know you were in a sorority."

The unknown man turned to pour out some drinks, Mark's hand holding onto his shoulder for balance as people shoved their way through. 

"Oh, I'm not." You shook your head, taking a sip of the beer poured into the cup, "Yeri was able to get us in."

"Yeri's here?" Mark began to whip his head around, looking for the mentioned lady, "Dude, I didn't know she'd be here." His hand began to slap at the other's shoulder.

"Guess it's time you get over your fear." The other called to Mark, who grabbed three of the cups in his hand.

"Oh, I completely forgot." He motioned between the three of them, "Uh, Jaehyun, this is Y/N, she's in my athletic science class. The one I was telling you about!" 

The man, now named Jaehyun, waved his free hand at you, "Nice to meet you."

"Man, Y/N's, like, the smartest girl in the class! She knows a lot about that stuff." Mark nudged him, "Maybe once she completes her residency, she can be your primary physician." He teased.

"You play sports?" You questioned, taking another sip of the beer from the cup, "What do you play?"

"Baseball. Nothing too exciting."

"Does he play sports? He's in the ML." Mark seemed more excited about it than Jaehyun was, your smile growing as you saw Jaehyun roll his eyes. "ML means major league." 

"I know what it means, Mark." You laughed, "But, hey, congratulations! It must be nice." You smiled to Jaehyun, "Have you always wanted to play major league?"

Jaehyun shrugged, "Got scouted in high school. Johnny was the one who convinced me to accept it."

Mark laughed, "Well, hey, Y/N, it's nice to see you. If you want, we're gonna be at the couch with everyone." He used his elbow to motion over to the center of the house, "No pressure!"

You nodded, "Yeah, sure. I can help you carry some of the cups." You grabbed two of the cups from the counter in one hand, following the two of them back over to the couch where Johnny, Yeri, and other attendees sat, including the girls from the front door. You squatted slightly to place the cups down on the coffee table, wincing softly as you felt your knee creak.

"You okay?" Jaehyun, who wandered behind you to sit down, asked, his hand lingering on your back as you stumbled.

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine." You laughed awkwardly, sitting down on the couch, "Old injury." You waved it off, taking another drink of your beer.

Mark found a spot next to Yeri, smiling softly as he greeted her and began conversating with her. You glanced at the two, chuckling softly as you watched Mark's cheeks turn pink.

You heard a jumble of words from Jaehyun, turning your head back to him, "What was that?" You leaned closer to him to hear him over the music playing over the subwoofer speakers.

"What from, if you don't mind me asking?" He repeated into your ear, his breath gently fanning across your cheek.

"I used to play volleyball." You shrugged, "Liberio, so, I normally fell on my knees." Your hand found it's way to the cap of your knee, rubbing it with your hand.

"Used to?"

"Yeah. I stopped playing after the injury." You laughed, nodding your head, "But, my doctor was really sweet. She actually helped me to study up until the entrance exam." 

Jaehyun nodded his head, "Well, I know myself and other athletes will be happy for your help." 

You smiled, laughing softly, "I hope." You turned slightly to look at him as he sat back against the couch, his arm resting over the back, "Do you like the major leauge?" Setting down your cup, you looked at him.

Jaehyun shrugged, "It's nice. I've been on a training regimen since I started. I mostly joined just cause I love baseball, though." He smiled, the cup resting in his hand on top of his thigh, "But, I mean, the coach and my teammates are pretty cool. And the pay isn't bad."

"I bet." You chuckled softly, "At least you get to do what you love." You smiled at him.

"How do you-"

"When are you-"

You both spoke over one another, both of you laughing.

Jaehyun motioned to you, "You go first." He reached his hand up to lean his head against it, looking at you.

"I was just gonna ask how you know Johnny and Mark." You shook your head, "I know you said that Johnny encouraged you to accept the scouting offer in high school. But, how'd you meet Mark?"

Jaehyun laughed, his hand reaching up to rub his temples, "Well, it's a pretty funny story." He started, glancing at Mark, who continued to talk Yeri's ear off, "He kinda joined the frat after finding out I was apart of it. I was only apart of it for a month, but, you know, sometimes people just get close."

"Well, if I do say so myself, it seems Mark is ecstatic that he knows you personally." You nodded to Jaehyun.

"I'm glad."

Yeri turned to you quickly, tapping your shoulder, "Hey, Y/N." She called to you, pulling your sight away from Jaehyun to look at her, "Wanna dance?"

You glanced at Jaehyun, and back at her, your mouth open and shutting like a golfish, "I-I really shouldn't... My knee."

Yeri groaned, "Come on! I love this song." She pouted, rubbing her hands together as she silently pleaded.

It was true, she did love this song. God, the amount of times she'd play this song in the car would make you nauseous. And you didn't have much of a choice when she pulled you up from where you were sitting to drag you into the crowd of people dancing to the music.

"How are you and Mark?" You called into her ear, the two of you holding hands as you both lazily danced.

Yeri glanced back at Mark, who was happily comversating with Jaehyun and Johnny, giggling like a little kid before she turned to you, "He's so much fun to talk to." She smiled.

You smiled back, happy to see her happy. "I'm glad." You responded, "Plus, he really likes you. You know he can't hide his feelings well." You glanced back at the three, glancing at your feet as you caught Jaehyun's eye.

Your friend smirked, laughing softly, "Oh, I see what's going on." She nudged your shoulder, which you rubbed with your hand as you looked at her, "You've got the hots for number 16." Yeri teased.

"What?" Your voice came out slightly higher, considering the assumption, "No, no." You shook your head, "I just met him."

"Doesn't mean you can't find him hot." She nudged you again, "Johnny told me he was expecting him to come tonight." She pulled out her phone, opening the tab of her browser to show you the search. "Jung Jaehyun, major league pitcher." In the middle of the crowd, you glanced between the phone and the man who sat on the couch, "Number 16." Yeri's finger clicked on a photo of Jaehyun, the front of the jersey embroidered with big red letters that read, "Sentinels".

"Wow." It's all you could say. You knew Mark said he was in major league, but you didn't think that major. You were thinking maybe small hometown baseball that made it big. "He even has a trading card?"

Yeri nodded, locking her phone before putting it back in her pocket, "He's big." She nodded her head, "Professional Sentinels player, going on his fourth year with the team."

You were flabbergasted. No wonder Mark was so excited telling you.

Standing there, you thought for a second, "If he's so big, why isn't anyone freaking out about him being here?" You raised an eyebrow.

Yeri raised her own brow, "You'll be surprised how many athletics students don't watch athletics." She hummed, nodding her head at her own statement.

"Okay, well, now that you told me this, I'll just feel like a gold digger." You rubbed your neck shyly, completely unaware the end of the song just as another one kicked up.

"Shut up." She scrunched up her face again, grabbing your hand to lead you back to the couch where you both were previously sat, "You're fine. You're nothing like a gold digger."

"Welcome back!" Johnny called, motioning to the couch.

Yeri sat the both of you down, smiling at Mark as soon as she got comfortable, taking the cup from his hand to take a sip.

You sat down, Jaehyun to your right and Yeri to your left. 

Jaehyun's whole hand covered the top of the cup he held, slowly passing it to you, "I held onto your drink while you were gone." He smiled.

"Oh, thank you." You nodded to him, taking a small swig of the drink, glancing at him shyly.

He wore much more lax clothing; a black long sleeved shirt and black cargo pants, various rings along his fingers and a silver necklace with an charm you couldn't quite see as it was flipped over. You glanced away, watching Jaehyun smile softly as you took another sip.

"What?" You questioned, blushing softly as he continued to stare.

"Nothing. Nothing." He mumbled, "Just... don't drink too much." 

You smiled softly, setting the now empty cup down on the table, "Don't worry. I normally only have one drink and I'm done." You sat back on the couch, looking at him.

You both sat there for a second, not saying anything. Jaehyun would glance over the back of the couch every once in a while, meeting the hands of other members of Greek life, making small conversations with them, or even sharing a few laughs as they conversed. Sometimes Johnny or Mark would join in.

Slowly, you felt your social battery slowly drain, and you whispered to Yeri to share where you'd be going; outside, in the expansive, empty backyard of the frat house, away from the music, crowds and smell of alcohol in the air.

You sighed softly as you relaxed against a chair in the backyard, glancing down at your phone to slowly recharge your own battery.

Yet, it seemed like despite being away, your thoughts and fingers lingered back to Jaehyun, typing his name across the keyboard into the search bar.

There were articles about him, fan pages, compilation videos of some of his pitches and plays. Professional photos and fan captures. He really was larger than life. 

The baseball uniform he wore was clean and pristine aside from the red dirt across the left side of his body, and after much digging, you found out that after batting, he'd reach a base by sliding. 

You found yourself diving headfirst into doom scrolling about Jaehyun, his career, what people thought about him. His record with the team was clean, and his ability was impressive. He was often claimed as MVP of his team, giving them several wins in their games.

The sliding door opening was enough to have you scrambling to lock your phone and set it down in your lap. You glanced behind you, finding it was nothing more than another guest at the frat party, gagging as they turned the corner to spill their guts. 

You pulled a face, standing up to move back inside to the party, the sudden smell of puke and alcohol mixing making you feel sick, mixing together just as you opened the door to step back inside. 

You recharged your social battery just enough to continue talking before Yeri wanted to leave, yet it dropped right back down again as the smell settled around you. Did it always smell like sweat? Did the floor always feel sticky? Did the counters have all those cups on them? 

Everything felt so overwhelming.

"Hey, are you okay?" 

It's the second time that voice has asked you if you were feeling okay. You pull your eyes away from looking at the scene before you to look at Jaehyun, whose eyes were softened.

"I was just about to check on you." He mumbled.

"I'm okay." You took a deep breath in, slowly exhaling, "It's a little overwhelming in here." 

"Yeah." Jaehyun chuckled, letting him step behind you to slowly guide you away from the big group of people, "Here. This way you can get the best of both worlds." Jaehyun leaned beside you against the wall close to the front door, holding the brim of his plastic cup with his fingers, glancing around at the group as it only grew bigger.

"Thank you." You whispered, crossing your legs as you leaned against the wall, "Hey, so, I know Mark said you were in major league, and... Yeri kinda showed me the google search about you."

Jaehyun laughed softly, "Yeah." He rubbed the back of his neck, "Sentinels."

"Yeah." You nodded, looking at him, "Must be cool going places and getting recognized." 

He shrugged, "I mean, it's all the same. Often times people don't know it's me without a cap or a batting helmet." Jaehyun nodded, "It is pretty cool having a trading card, though." He smiled to you, turning to look at you.

"I saw that! Did you see how much someone's willing to pay for a signed one?" You chuckled.

"Yeah, I did." He laughed too, "Can't believe someone has that much money to spend on a piece of paper. Especially when I started not too long ago."

"Well, I mean, you do get that type of money." You nudged him, feeling your uneasiness quickly disappearing as you spoke to him.

Jaehyun shook his head, "Most of it goes to bills and taxes." A group of some Pi Pho frat brothers pushed by, forcing Jaehyun into you, his arm above your head to make sure he didn't crush you, "Jesus fu- Christ." He didn't finish the swear, glancing at you, "Are you okay?" He glanced at the people sprinting by, one slipping and dropping their cup of alcohol.

"I'm fine." You whispered, "Fine."

Jaehyun leaned his arm on the wall, right above your head. His face was close enough to see the details. He smelt good — like rose and ember; so much so that it was intoxicating. His dimples and his eyes as he smiled, the faint stubble along his chin and his upper lip. The necklace hanging from his neck, the emblem still flipped backwards; you were beginning to think he put it on backwards for it to face away from others. As you appreciated his features you realized that perhaps he was sculpted from marble by Michelangelo himself. 

The faint smell of alcohol from his red solo cup and a puddle of the spilled liquor from the brothers swirled around the both of you. The song changed beat and volume, glancing around the corner to find Johnny turning up the dial, the bass nearly blowing out your eardrums.

"Don't you have a game tomorrow?" You spoke into his ear over the music, feeling your heart flutter as he turned his head slightly so you didn't have to move much.

He chuckled, shrugging, "It's kinda tradition to visit before a game." He responded, his lips gently brushing against your cheek as he spoke.

You nodded as he moved back to his position, smiling at him, "So, do you always linger around the university or...?"

"No," He shook his head, and you can see the liquid courage glossing his eyes, "But, I mean, if I got to find someone as beautiful as you, maybe it's not a bad idea." Someone nudged behind him, causing him to straighten up with his chest hitting your own. He had you pressed flush against the wall, but he obviously wasn't focused on that as he glanced behind him, "A lot of energy for you students." He laughed as he looked back at you, "Must be nice to be young."

You laughed, smiling at him, "Aren't you only 27?"

"Well, yeah, but..." He playfully rolled his neck over his shoulders, "At some point in time, these old bones have to rest."

"And you decided to do that at an old frat house with a bunch of newly turned 21 year olds?"

He shrugged again, "Better than the old farts in the league." He glanced around the party, noticing multiple of the attendees either drinking to their restless end, making out with some of the bubbly blonde sorority sisters or passed out on the ground, table or couch. He noticed Mark talking up a storm with Yeri, and Johnny handing out more drinks to guests, "But, you're right. Wanna head out?"

"Yo-you wanna leave with me?" You stammered.

He laughed, "Yeah!" He smiled, his dimples making an appearance once more, "How rare is it that I meet a beautiful woman here among all these girls?"

You blushed at his compliment, smiling before nodding your head, "Yeah. Yeah, let's head out." You stood up straight, Jaehyun pushing away from the wall, "Let me just let Yeri know where I'm gonna be at." You stepped around him, making your way over to the couch where Yeri sat, "Yeri." You tapped her shoulder, and when she didn't turn around you called her again, "Yeri!"

"What?" She turned to you, "Is something wrong?"

"I'm heading out." You spoke into her ear, "With Jaehyun."

Yeri smirked, nudging your shoulder, "Come on, stop messing with me." She laughed.

"I'm not messing with you!" You chuckled, "Hey, you have my location, and maybe I'll be back tonight, most likely tomorrow morning." You gave Mark a wave as you made your way down the hallway once more.

"Use protection!" She called loudly as you walked off, continuing her conversation with Mark. 

You made your way back to where you and Jaehyun were standing previously, catching sight of Jaehyun in the kitchen, bidding Johnny farewell with a one-armed hug and an untraditional handshake. The two were laughing as they both finished up their conversation, Jaehyun walking straight towards you, "You ready?"

"Yeah. I'm ready."

Jaehyun took your hand in his own, guiding you out of the frat house. The silence of the night was a comforting contrast to the loud frat party you were both victims of attending. The rustle of the leaves, the sound of wind whistling. It was the only sounds you could hear as your ears adjusted to the noise disappearing. 

The street lamps gave you better sight of Jaehyun's figure. His arms were ripped, to say the least. He had veins crawling up from his hand to his elbow, and his hand was a little rough, calloused skin from swinging baseball bats for a lifetime. 

The two of you approached a fairly new car, but still a few years behind the recent model. Jaehyun unlocked the door, and pulled open the passenger side.

"Thanks." You whispered, settling into the seat. You slowly buckled in the seatbelt, Jaehyun gently closing the door just as the realization just set in that you were in the car with a national professional athlete. The butterflies began to fly from your stomach into your throat, and you were worried if you even spoke that you'd just embarrass yourself.

Jaehyun climbed into the driver's seat, sighing softly as he reached up to stick the key into the ignition, "Sorry. I didn't expect to bring anyone back with me, so, I brought my less inconspicuous car." He chuckled softly.

"No, no! It's fine. I mean, you're already one step ahead of me. I don't even have a license, so, I have no right to judge." You matched his chuckle, smiling at him. "Besides, there's something more humble about an old 2008 Honda Civic." 

Jaehyun let the car warm up for a second before he pulled off from the curb, his hand lingering on the stick shift, his foot lingering on the clutch. 

You began to admire his hands once more. He had slender fingers, his wrist was adorned by a silver cuban link bracelet, another vein wrapping around his arm and ending at his bicep. You could tell he's worked out, but not too much. I mean, he is a professional athlete for a living, so him working out wasn't much of a surprise. Just as he stopped at a stop light, you pulled your eyes from his form and glanced out the window. 

The both of you drove through the heart of the city, your eyes catching the bright lights as you stared at the window. It was a nice difference from University Road. The quiet melody of music played from the radio, filling the tense silence between the two of you. Jaehyun clearly kept the car in good shape. There were zero stains on the seating, the steering wheel and bulb of the stick shift were a little worn from where his hands rested, the radio seemed intact.

Jaehyun continued to drive, clearing his throat, "You can change the channel, if you'd like to." He motioned to the radio, before he quickly downshifted, "I have a bunch of CD's in the glove box."

You took the initiative to open the glove box, smiling to yourself as you saw the CD case, unzipping and opening it. You weren't sure if you were smiling because he seemed like such an old soul for keeping CD's for his older car, or because it looked like the CD's were all in alphabetical order. "Crazy Town?" You questioned teasingly.

There was a slight tint at the shell of Jaehyun's ear, chuckling, "What can I say? They're revolutionary." He looked into his mirror and over his shoulder as he switched lanes, glancing over at you as he saw you eyeballing him, "What?"

"Just never took you for one who enjoyed rock music like this." You continued to flip through the CD case, seeing various discs of music; including, but not limited to rock, pop, hip hop and r&b. There were more genres that you didn't really recognize and you tried to read the fine print to see if they printed it, but no luck. "I think it's definitely fair to say you listen to every genre."

Jaehyun chuckled, watching you insert the Crazy Town CD into the reader, his hand quickly moving to turn down the volume, "I just listen to music. Genre doesn't matter to me."

You smiled to yourself, slowly turning the volume up as the CD started playing. The silence felt less tense now as the music played between the both of you. Given the circumstances, you needed the tension to die down. 

You looked out the window, not recognizing the area you were in very well, but you definitely recognized the giant building on the side of the road; two tall buildings beside each other, the sign reading "The Hallows".

Jaehyun took a very gentle left turn into the roundabout, stopping right in the middle as he climbed out and passed the keys to his 2008 Honda Civic to the valet. 

"You live... here?" You questioned, staring up at the buildings.

Jaehyun chuckled, grabbing your hand in his, "Yeah." He smiled, "It's pretty nice. Out of the way." He guided you into the lobby of the building, and you were even more awestruck.

Everything in the lobby were either expensively vintage or expensively new. They even had a couch you would see frequently in a magazine you glanced over while you waited in line at the supermarket. A couch you could only dream of purchasing. For this condo — penthouse, seems more likely — complex to have 4 sets of a couch that only the richest people can afford already told you what to expect.

Jaehyun greeted the front desk attendant, calling the elevator for the two of you, his hand holding yours gently. 

A small chime was heard just as the doors to the lift open, and he motioned for you to step inside. You took a step in, glancing at every corner, making eye contact with the camera. 

Jaehyun sighed softly, clicking the floor button as he stepped inside, stopping just beside you. "Sorry if this makes you all uncomfortable." He started, "I realize now just how awkward it might be to show up here. Like I'm showing off."

"No, no, it's not your fault! You make your money the same way I do, you're allowed to spend it where you please." You smiled, "And sometimes where you please to spend it is at a gigantic apartment building, and that's okay." 

Jaehyun chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck, "I'm just enjoying your company so much, I don't wanna scare you away."

You smiled to yourself, messing with your fingers as you glanced down at your feet, "I'm enjoying your company, too." You chuckle, "A lot."

Jaehyun smiled brightly as the elevator doors opened once more, and grabbed your hand back in his own as he guided you down the hallway, swinging your intertwined hands as he walked. His free hand grabbed his keys and skillfully unlocked the door, allowing you to step inside.

Which you agreed to, and you were met with a large condo, with a window large enough to span across the wall of his condo. The skyline was bright enough to light up the wall straight across from it. There was a giant kitchen, a giant living room. The whole place was giant. 

Jaehyun tossed his keys into a catch bowl by the front door, flicking on the lights.

"It's..." You paused as you continued to take in the sights, "It's beautiful."

"Yeah, my... Johnny and Mark kinda got a little excited with an interior designer and they decorated it like crazy."

You smiled, taking off your shoes to set them to the side before you took a step further. "Did you always have the idea to have an open floor plan?"

"Well, no, but like I said, Johnny and Mark got excited." Jaehyun chuckled, "Gave me a bachelor's pad when I'm hardly even a bachelor."

"Live while you're young." You whispered to yourself as you admired the city line. Jaehyun stopped beside you, but his eyes lingered on your reaction, which he was generally pleased to see.

Jaehyun cleared his throat, his fingers pulling at the cuff of his long sleeved shirt, "So, Mark told me a lot about you." He started.

"Did he mention how I let him cheat off my papers?" You teased, turning to look at Jaehyun.

"No, no, nothing like that." Jaehyun laughed, shaking his head, "But, he did show me your SNS accounts." 

"Oh, that's embarrassing."

"I think you looked amazing." Jaehyun whispered back almost immediately, "But, you look more amazingin person."

"It seems like we both looked up each other."

Jaehyun shrugged, "That's why I wasn't as upset when you did it." He smiled, "Where was I going with this?" He mumbled to himself, "Mark really talked me up for this." 

The tension between you both returned. And it wasn't an awful tension. It was tension that was telling you that obviously something was going to happen. You didn't know how long or what Mark said to him, but you couldn't help but thank Mark for whatever length of time he's been talking to Jaehyun about you.

Jaehyun cleared his throat again, feeling like all the words he prepared for this moment had disappeared from his mind. His eyes that were once watching you turned to look out the window where you were looking previously.

"You don't have to force yourself." You whispered, smiling at him. 

Jaehyun smiled back, turning to look at the couch, "Come on, let's sit down." He sat down on the leather couch, and you could notice he was in his element.

You followed, sitting beside him. 

"You didn't have to come here if you weren't comfortable." He started, his hand finding your own, "I know it's pretty awkward to get picked up at a frat party, and I never meant to put you in a position where you didn't think you could say no."

"Oh, I didn't think of it like that." You chuckled, "Trust me, if I wanted to say no, I would've." 

Jaehyun leaned a little closer, drawing his bottom lip in with his teeth, "Can I kiss you?"

God, you've been waiting for that question all night. Nodding your head, you smiled as Jaehyun's lips pressed against yours. The hands you have been admiring for the last 30 minutes during the car ride were now placed on your hips as he attempted to pull you closer until you were practically on his lap. He tasted of Heinekien beer, and spearmint, and you began to question when and where did he get gum or mouth spray from. Despite the mix, his lips were soft, and they were tender against your own.

Jaehyun pulled away slowly after a moment of kissing you, his hands lingering on your waist, his eyes opening to look into your own.

You both shared a small laugh, a lingering peck placed on his lips.

"You don't know how long I've wanted to do that." Jaehyun whispered, letting a sigh escape his lips.

Glancing at your phone's time, you chuckled, "Can't be anymore than 2 hours." You teased, "But, if it's any consolation, I've been thinking about it too."

Jaehyun rolled his eyes, "You really aren't aware of how much Mark's been trying to set me up with you." He whispered.

"Is that so?" You raised an eyebrow, "How long?"

Jaehyun sighed, running a hand through his hair, "Months, at least." He leaned his head against the back of the couch, the hair he pushed back falling back into his eyes, "He's been trying to set me up with you for the longest. Johnny, too."

You rolled your eyes, "You're telling me that tonight was one giant ploy to get us to finally meet?"

"No, no, definitely not. That was a frat party, through and through. But, I'm happy we could've met there." Jaehyun gently grabbed your hand, pressing soft kisses to your fingers.

"Are you always this romantic?" 

"Only with people I actually have feelings for."

"And that implies that there's people that you have had feelings for."

Jaehyun chuckled, "It does. But, none of them were you." He smiled, intertwining his fingers with your own. You looked at the size of his hand compared to yours, the length of his fingers compared to yours. Jaehyun had height, and his hands definitely matched that; slender fingers, thick veins, soft skin. His nails were well kept too, considering what he did for a living.

His words repeated in your head, and you had to stop yourself from smiling. To be desired and admired for that long, with nothing but Mark's words and your social media posts to hold him over. 

"Why didn't you just follow me and talk to me?" You chuckled, watching him kiss your hand and wrist.

"It's not like I have a personal account. I only have my professional one for work." He whispered softly, "Plus, I had to see if you were interested first. I'm not good at that over text." 

You rolled your eyes, "Excuses."

Jaehyun chuckled, "Maybe a little. I just didn't want to swing and miss." He smiled, "I have an idea." He sat a little closer, his fingers playing with your own again, "Why don't you come to the game tomorrow? I have one pass left."

"I don't know a single thing about baseball." 

"That's fine." He smiled, "I'm not expecting you to figure out the miles per hour of my fastball. I just... I think I'd do better with you there." 

"Who else is gonna be there?"

"Johnny, Mark, and your friend. Mark wanted to show off." Jaehyun's dimples made another appearance, and you couldn't help your heart racing behind your ribcage. "You don't have to say yes, but I'll be happy if you were there."

You thought for what felt like minutes, but in reality, it was nothing but seconds, "Yeah. I think it'd be fun."

"Unless we totally lose." He chuckled, "My only excuse would be that I was too distracted by you."

"Are you always this cheesy?" You smiled, shaking your head.

Jaehyun met your smile with his own, "I can be." He shrugged.

"It's cute." You whispered, "I'd love to see you play, Jaehyun."

Jaehyun was physically fighting his excitement, giving another shy smile, "Great. Great." He chuckled, squeezing your hand. "If that's the case, we should probably head to bed then. We've gotta be up early if we wanna make it in time."

"Right." Your hand reaches for your phone in your back pocket, and you open your contacts, getting ready to call a taxi to pick you up, "I can get a cab ride home."

"I was thinking..." He locked your phone, "Maybe you could spend the night here." He whispered shyly. 

"Oh." You thought for a second, "Oh!" 

Jaehyun chuckled, "Doesn't have to be anything more than innocent, if that's what you want." He stood up from the couch, your hand lingering in his. "Come on, I have some clothes you can wear."

"Please don't tell me you're gonna dress me up like Adam Sandler." You stood up, letting him guide you down the long hallway to his — once again — gigantic bedroom. The lighting was dim, and you would've thought he had the lights on the entire day if it wasn't for the sound of the switch flipping. There was a bay window adjacent to the bed set of velvety black duvet, sheets and dark stained bed frame. 

Jaehyun let you linger by the door while he wandered off to somewhere around the corner, only to return with a red dirt stained baseball jersey and a pair of sweats you were sure weren't going to fit you. "Here you go."

You snapped back from admiring his bedroom to grab the clothes, smiling at him, "Did you wash this?"

Jaehyun nodded, "Red dirt stains. Only way to get it out is power washing." 

"Good enough for me." You laughed, "Where should I change?"

"Oh! Right, right." He stepped behind you to guide you by your shoulders to the double bathroom, "You can change in here." He looked at you through the mirror, smiling softly, "And, if you aren't comfortable with us sleeping in the same bed, I can always take the guest room."

"You have a guest room, too?" You chuckled, setting the spare clothes he gave you on the counter.

"Yeah. The bed isn't as comfortable in there as it is in here, though." Jaehyun continued to watch you through the mirror before he turned his eyes away and walked out of the bathroom, "I'll let you get changed." He nodded, shutting the door behind him.

You took a little longer to admire the bathroom, your fingers running across the granite counter, the big mirror and the nice black sinks. He had a walk-in shower, lined with dark grey tile. You peeked around the sliding door to the shower, catching sight of a shower ledge where the occupant could sit. 

You smiled to yourself before you turned to start changing your clothes, pulling on the clothes Jaehyun was nice enough to offer. It smelled like him. And they were nice and soft.

You folded up the clothes you wore to the party, setting them to the side of the sink closest to the door, gently opening the door.

Jaehyun sat on the edge of the bed, standing up as soon as you stepped out, "Hey."

"Hi."

"They look better on you than on me." Jaehyun chuckled softly, blushing a soft pink, pushing his hair back with his hand, "I knew they would."

You raised an eyebrow, chuckling softly, "Is this your way of saying you wanna see me wear your clothes more often?"

"Yes, definitely." He wore clear framed glasses, andyou could swear you saw them fogging up from the blush growing on his cheeks. "I definitely want to see you in my clothes more often." He grabbed your hand in his own, squeezing it gently.

"We'll see." You teased, squeezing his hand back.

Jaehyun smiled, "Did you think... about...?" He pointed at the bed, silently asking. 

"If you want me to, I can sleep in the guest room." You started, "I mean, it's your bedroom. I am a guest."

"I have no issue sleeping in the guest room. The whole bed thing... that was a joke." Jaehyun cleared his throat, obviously tense. "The mattress in the other room is just the right amount of soft and stiff."

You had to stifle the laugh that threatened to leave. "Jaehyun, really, I don't have an issue sleeping in the guest room."

He nodded his head, "Okay, okay." He smiled awkwardly, "But, really, I wouldn't mind if you stayed in here with me. Just put this whole thing behind us." He laughed.

"Hm, that might be easier." You continued to hold his hand as you sat on the edge of the bed, "As long as you promise to not crush me."

"Don't worry. I sleep like a log. Fall asleep in one position, wake up in the morning in the same." He held up his hands in defense, "I also promise to try to keep my hands to myself."

"Haha." You laughed sarcastically, sitting him beside you.

"I'm just kidding. I'll keep my hands to myself if you want me to." He nudged you, intertwining your fingers together.

"And if I don't?"

Jaehyun raised an eyebrow again, glancing at you, "Then I won't."

You smiled, "Sounds like a plan." You let go of his hand to crawl up to the head of the bed, laying on your side as you rested on a pillow.

"What? Like you not wanting me to keep my hands to myself or...?"

You laughed, "Just come lay down. It's already almost 3am and you said we have to be up early, didn't you?" 

Jaehyun took off his glasses, setting them down on the bedside table, laying down on the pillow next to yours, a soft smile on his face. 

☆

You aren't sure when you fell asleep, and you definitely weren't sure about how you ended up with Jaehyun's arm over your hip, the alarm clock beside his bed blaring the god sound of the "Apex" ring tone. You slowly sat up, rubbing your eye and running your hand through your hair. You took a second to remember the scene of Jaehyun's bedroom before your eyes, turning your head to admire him. You were aware how odd it felt that you were allowing yourself to lay beside him in his bed, wearing his clothes. You weren't sure why you were doing this. 

You tried to convince yourself it was the alcohol you had the night before but you weren't even tipsy, let alone drunk. You could feel the butterflies flutter in your stomach as you thought about the night before, studying his face as he slept. You wondered how many people would kill to see this view. 

"Jaehyun." You whispered, leaning against your hand, brushing some hair from out of his face. 

"Hmm?" He grumbled, obviously half asleep.

"It's 8 a.m." You responded gently, quietly trying to coerce him out of his slumber, "We're gonna be late, Jaehyun."

Jaehyun groaned, pulling his arm back to his chest as he sat up and pressed the stop button on his home screen. He sighed, pulling his legs out of the covers so they could touch the ground. 

Some moment throughout the night, Jaehyun obviously pulled on a large white t-shirt and sweats, expelled the shirt from his body (evident by the white t-shirt thrown at the foot of the bed), and went to sleep. 

His back was muscular, his shoulder blades prominent as he stretched his arms above his head and in front of him. His fingers wiped at his eyes before he pulled on his glasses and stood up to stretch further.

"Did you sleep well?" He asked gruffly, turning to look at you, "I hope I didn't hog the bed too much."

You fought with your eyes as they wanted to linger on the happy trail below his belly button, settling on shutting your eyes as you smiled at him, "It was perfect, Jaehyun."

The sound of rustling sheets made you open your eyes to find Jaehyun on all fours, his face impossibly closer to you, "Good." He whispered, using a hand to pinch your chin with his thumb and index finger, "I've been thinking about kissing you again since last night."

Your cheeks turned red, and your heart raced in your chest. "Why didn't you do something about it earlier then?"

"You looked too beautiful sleeping." He smiled, "But, if you'll allow me, I'd like to do something about it now."

You smiled, "I'll allow it."

Jaehyun chuckled, cupping your cheek to press a kiss against your lips. His lips were still as soft as they were the night before, his hands gently as his thumb rubbed across the skin of your cheek. Despite it feeling like minutes, it was only seconds in reality until Jaehyun pulled away.

"Can I consider that my good luck kiss for tonight?" He asked softly. 

"Yeah." You chuckled, "And if you win, I'll maybe consider giving you a victory kiss as well."

"Sweet." He nodded, moving back to climb off the bed, making his way to the bathroom, "I'm gonna take a quick shower."

"Alright."

"I'll be back."

"'Kay." You smiled as he stepped into the bathroom and shut the door, immediately reaching over to the nightstand to grab your phone. 

You don't know what you were thinking staying the night when you didn't even have a change of clothes. You sent Yeri a quick text asking her to grab you a set of clothes, anything would do. Especially something warm. 

You can tell she agreed when she started calling you on Facetime, which you answered.

"How was it?" She asked as soon as the call connected.

"What do you mean?" You asked, turning down the volume as you sat back against the headboard.

Yeri rolled her eyes, sitting up in her own bed, "Come on, share all the details." Her screen switched to "Paused" and you could only assume that she was scrolling either on Instagram or Tw- "Holy shit! You're at the Hallows?"

"Yeah, that's the name of the building."

"Y/N, how out of touch are you?" Yeri started, her face returning to the screen, "The Hallows is where all the famous people live, like Lee Jongsuk and Seo Inguk."

"Well, if you're asking, no, I haven't seen anyone." You started, "The lobby looked expensive, though."

"I've gotta see this!" She stood up, "Okay, tell me what outfit you want then I'll head there."

Yeri entered your room at your shared apartment, opening your closet and turning the camera to show you different shirts, pants and other fabrics. You both took about 30 minutes of the call deciding on a good outfit, before you both settled on something.

"I'll be there in a few. What should I do when I get there?" Yeri asked, folding the clothes neatly into a bag.

"I can grab the clothes from you in the lobby." You nodded, "I'll see you when you get here."

"Bye. Love you."

"Love you, Yeri." You responded before ending the call. 

You heard the shower water come to a stop, and you fully expected Jaehyun to walk out of the bathroom but you sat there, staring at the door as he stood behind it. 

A text from Yeri came through your phone and you stood up, making a slow trek to the front door, which you opened and closed behind you. You remembered the door number, and the floor number, and you memorized the button you'd have to press to get back up. You suddenly felt awkward to even walk down into the lobby wearing Jaehyun's clothes, but the awkwardness melt away as you saw the area empty. Yeri was the only one there, recording herself for her Instagram story. 

She was too absorbed in recording the lobby that when you stood in front of her as the camera panned to you, she jumped, a yelp getting cut off just as she released the button. "Jesus, you scared the crap out of me." She said through a laugh, patting your shoulder. 

"Do I look that bad?" You questioned, grabbing the clothes from her hand.

"No, you don't look bad. You know me." She chuckled, I brought you some extra shoes too, so you don't have to worry about wearing the ones from yesterday." 

"You're awesome."

"It's really nice in here." She started, looking around the lobby, "I almost feel too broke to be here." 

You ran your finger over the clothes, chuckling, "I felt the same." You smiled, "So, how'd it go last night with Mark?" 

Yeri smiled to herself, "Well, I think it went wonderfully." She paused, playing with her keyring, "He asked if I wanted to come with him to Jaehyun's game today." 

"I heard." You laughed, "At least you'll have me to play wingman."

"You're coming too?" She smiled, "Awesome! Now I don't have to be so nervous." 

You laughed, "I've gotta get ready. Jaehyun's already in the shower and everything." You gave her a hug, "Get back safe."

"Text me if anything new happens!"

"Same with you." You called the elevator, watching her walk back out to her car, where you're sure she'd play her song of the week over and over until she got tired of it.

You retraced your steps as you stepped into the elevator, thinking of the night before as Jaehyun clicked the floor button to get you up to his place. The elevator stalled, then moved upwards. 

You felt the same butterflies in your stomach as you rode the elevator up, smiling to yourself as you glanced down at the clothes you held in your arms.

Could you even begin to consider this a date? You thought to yourself, It could be considered nothing more than just visiting Jaehyun's workplace. 

As the elevator stopped, you made your way down the hallway and stopped right outside Jaehyun's front door. You knocked on the door, waiting patiently for him to open the door. Which he opened, to him wearing nothing more than black sweatpants around his waist, his hair dripping droplets down his collarbones. 

"Hi." You looked at him.

"Hey." He chuckled, "I thought you left."

You shook your head, "Without my shoes?"

"Good point." He opened the door a bit wider for you to step inside, which you did.

"Yeri just brought me some clothes to wear for today." You motioned to the folded clothes in your arms.

"That's nice of her." Jaehyun smiled, "You can use the bathroom to change if you'd like." He closed the door, "I'm making something to eat as well."

You nodded, making your way to the bathroom in the hallway, quickly changing into the outfit Yeri and yourself picked out through the video call. It looked almost as nice as you thought when you imagined it. Sure, the black shirt was darker than the washed out black pants, but you think that added to the charm. You folded up the clothes Jaehyun offered the night before on top of the washing machine in the bathroom, slowly opening the door into the hallway once more. 

It smelled of maple syrup and coffee, and you took a seat at the island in Jaehyun's kitchen as you watched him cook. It was simple breakfast food; bacon, eggs and some rice. You spot the coffeepot brewing, the soft sound of the java hitting the glass pot. Jaehyun seems to have taken a step away from the kitchen to pull on a shirt to wear. 

"Thank you." You whispered softly as he set a plate down in front of you of the food, taking a bite of the bacon. 

Jaehyun smiled at you, taking a seat beside you as he started to eat his meal with you as well. It was silent, save for the water used to make the coffee coming to an abrupt halt. It wasn't an uncomfortable silence, not at all. It was comfortable. Like sitting in silence together was comforting enough. 

As soon as you both finished, Jaehyun cleaned up, poured himself a quick cup of coffee after offering — which you respectfully decline, "trying to cut back," you'd joke — and grabbed the bags by the door that you didn't notice earlier. A giant duffle back, and a backpack that looked like it's been through Hell and back, littered with handwriting, even some quips from Mark and Johnny. You joined him in The Heights spacious garage, climbing into the newest Genesis model as he opened the door for you after he shoved his bags into the backseat. 

Throughout the car ride, as his phone connected to Bluetooth and changed through the songs, Jaehyun would grab your hand every once in a while, not paying much attention to it as he drove to the stadium. You didn't bother moving your hand. 

Jaehyun pulled into the back of the stadium, parking his car in some obscure area and helped you out. There were news tabloids, sports enthusiasts and paparazzi everywhere, and you felt your heart racing in your throat. But Jaehyun made quickly to avoid them, pulling you in front of him as he stepped through the door before the cameras started flashing. All you saw before it shut was a blinding flash.

Jaehyun sighed softly, adjusting the bag over his shoulder, "This is where we split off." He whispered.

You felt upset. You spent nearly the last 12 hours with him and for him to split off from you now for who knows how long felt so weird. You could tell you grew attached to him.

"Hey," Jaehyun chuckled, "The game doesn't start until 6:30, you've got the rest of the day to chill." His hand trailed down your arm before he grabbed your hand.

"I know." You chuckled, "I do have some homework I was planning to finish from last night, so I could do that while I wait."

Jaehyun smiled, "Great." He rubbed his thumb against the back of your hand, "Come on, I'll show you where you'll sit when the game starts." He began walking, silently passing you his jacket and let you sit down in the front row of the seats, watching as the field attendants chalked the dirt, and maintained the advertisements against the barriers. 

Jaehyun walked off after you sat down, giving you a wave as he walked off to where he needed to go.

You didn't realize how focused on your schoolwork you were until you felt the cold breeze and the loud chatter of other attendees. The stadium lights were turned on and the field attendants you saw hours ago were no longer there. You shifted uncomfortably in your seat as people push by your legs; unsure whether you should stand up from the chair to let people through or pull them up to your chest. You pulled on the coat Jaehyun had given to you earlier around your shoulders, waiting patiently by yourself for the other three guests to arrive. 

And when they did, you smiled up at them.

"Yo, Y/N, what's up?" Mark gave you a headnod, sitting on a seat only one away from you. Yeri and Johnny followed behind Mark. Your best friend taking the seat right beside you.

Johnny sighed, "You guys are gonna make the tallest, lankiest guy push through you all?" You could tell he wasn't irritated, clearly making a small joke as he stepped over your feet to sit in the seat beside Mark. He sat down with a sigh, adjusting the jacket over his shoulders.

Mark and Johnny shared a quip with one another, Mark sharing a boisterous laugh like he always did. 

Yeri nudged you, smiling sweetly, "So, what have you been doing while waiting for the entertainment to return?" She asked.

You held up your phone, the word document plastered on the screen, "Homework."

"Like always." She sighed, "You look nice."

"Thanks." You smiled, quickly saving the document before you shoved the phone in the pocket of Jaehyun's jacket.

You and the trio all spoke to one another, talking about school, interests and other things to fill the time before you caught sight of the teams walking through their thresholds.

Attendants around you all began to share chants of their respective teams, some going as far to shout out jeering taunts to fans of the away team.

Johnny and Mark seemed familiar with this, standing from their seats and clapping as the teams prepared with their coaches for the game.

You caught sight of Jaehyun laughing, the mit around his hand worn and clearly aging. He looked around the stands, waving to fans before he stopped and glanced at you, giving a small wave and shy smile. 

The crowd exploded with a loud cheer after he waved at you, and the teams were off.

☆

A little over four hours later, the Sentinels had yet another win under their belt. Johnny and Mark were critiquing the plays made by both teams, while you and Yeri were busy trying to understand what the hell was happening in real time. It was different for the both of you when you were watching the plays in real time without any type of commentary or slow-mo videos to show the play. 

The wind picked up during the middle of the game and you were thankful Jaehyun gave you his jacket. Although, you weren't thankful for the wind sending a foul ball straight into the barrier net to keep the audience members safe. You could feel your heart racing, turning to laugh with Yeri, who was also frightened.

As soon as the game came to an end, everyone filed out of their seats, making there way to food stands or tailgates in the parking lot, where fans celebrated the Sentinels victory. Johnny, Mark, Yeri and yourself opted to waiting by the locker room for Jaehyun to walk out.

You held Jaehyun's coat over your arm, playing with your fingers as you waited. Mark and Johnny were having their own conversation while Yeri stood beside you, doing some complex edit to the photo she took with you and the boys to post on her Instagram story. 

"Dude, I'm hungry!" Mark complained, leaning his head back against the wall, rubbing his stomach.

Johnny snorted, "Yeah, I bet you want that stadium hot dog."

Mark gave his usual chortle, hitting Johnny's arm in a playful way, "Shut the hell up, dude." He spoke through his laughe. 

Yeri leaned against the wall beside you, sighing, "Yeah, I'm hungry, too. I haven't had stadium nachos in years."

"Yeri, the last time you've had stadium nachos was at school at the football game last week." You teased, locking your phone as you looked at her. 

"Well, it feels like years." She mumbled, looking at Mark, "Wanna come with me?"

You could see Mark's eyes light up, nodding his head rapidly, "Yeah, yeah, let's go."

Johnny kicked off the wall, his hands shoved into his jacket pockets, "I might as well come, too. Don't want you two to get lost." He looked at you quickly, "Wanna come, Y/N?"

"No, I'm okay. I ate before I came." You smiled softly, "You guys go eat. I'll wait for Jaehyun so he doesn't think we ditched him." You waved them off.

Yeri held up her phone, "Well, text me if you want anything."

You nodded your head, waving to them as they walked away before you leaned back against the wall as you pulled out your phone to occupy the short amount of time. 

You were invested in the random video of how fossils were formed, blackhead videos, mukbang ASMR, and other interesting videos. And you would've kept watching if you didn't see the last of the team file out of the locker room, save for the dark haired male you came with. You watched the team leave, and you pulled a frown. 

You began to question what was taking him so long, but decided to leave it as it was. It wasn't your concern what was taking him so long. You were a guest.

You looked at the locker room door for a moment longer, and hovered your thumb over the pause button on the video about who knows what — you blocked that information out. And just as you were about to press play, your phone chimed and vibrated.

jaehyun:

no one's in here, if you wanna come in.

so you don't have to wait in the cold.

delivered 1 sec ago

You blushed; for one, it was the men's locker room. And second, you didn't know where your thoughts were going. All you could remember was this morning, where Jaehyun pulled open his front door with just a towel on. You kept the text open for a moment, before you approached the locker room door. You looked both ways three times. One look was too quick. The second, in case any one was approaching. Third, for extra measure. 

Your fingers held onto the handle for a second as you contemplated a little more, the metal handle cold from the breeze drafting through the open stadium. 

You pulled open the door, peeking your head in slowly, "Jaehyun?" You called softly, your voice echoing off the walls, making it seem louder than you intended.

"Over here." Jaehyun responded, and you quickly stepped inside, the squeaking of the hydrolic hinge echoing just as loud as the door latching behind you. Your shoes hit the ground as you stepped in further to find Jaehyun within the maze of lockers. 

And you did find him. He stood by a locker, a black Sentinels branded towel hanging low around his waist. It's clearly not like you haven't seen him shirtless, let alone half-naked. You saw both visuals this morning. But it was the fact his hair dripped drops of water down his back, over his shoulders, even down his face. The fact his back and arms were so muscular. And the very obvious fact that beside the towel, he wore nothing at all.

Jaehyun turned around briefly, chuckling, "Hey." He whispered softly.

"Hi."

He smiled to himself at your small voice, using his hand to keep the towel around his hips. He seemed... shy? More shy than you've grown accustomed to. You were thinking that it was definitely because of the circumstances of where his clothes were. He cleared his throat, "Hey, I just... uh," He started, grabbing your hand in his own and stepping a little closer to you, "I wanted to say thank you for coming to see the game." He squeezed your hand in his own, smiling shyly, "It's the first time I've actually had so many people come see me. Uh, in terms of VIP."

"I'm glad I could come, too." You smiled back, "I had fun. Plus, it was nice to see an actual baseball game in person, and not on a television." You tilted your head to the side as you thought, "Although, I didn't expect that many grown men to get excited when you waved."

Jaehyun laughed, "Yeah, they can get pretty excited." He smiled, "But, I think that kiss you gave me this morning gave me the good luck I thought it would."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah." He chuckled, glancing away for a quick second, "Does that mean I get that victory kiss you were talking about?" He asked softly, the hand that held his towel tightly was released, cupping your cheek with it. "You said you'd consider it."

You laughed, kissing his lips softly. 

Two days. Two days of electric tension bubbling between you guys was finally boiling over the top as you both kissed. You could tell Jaehyun was kind enough to act as the gentleman he always was for these two days, but from the way his hands wandered as you both moved your lips in sync was enough to tell you that he was desperate to touch you, to claim you as his own.

At first, he had one hand against your cheek, then both hands resting on your hips, then before you knew it, Jaehyun's hands trailed down your legs, and guided them around his waist as he lifted you up effortlessly and seated you on his lap as he sat on the bench in the middle of the floor. Jaehyun's lips never stopped moving against your own, his thumb rubbing your thigh through your pants as you straddled his hips.

Jaehyun parted from the kiss momentarily, glancing at your face as your lips grew swollen from the kiss. His hands moved from your thighs and found their way under your shirt, his thumb brushing against the skin of your stomach. "You look amazing." He whispered, placing open-mouthed kisses against your neck. 

You rested your hand against his neck as he kissed yours, your other brushing your fingers against his arm; over the veins you admired the night before, over the carpal boss of his wrist before he intertwined his fingers with your own again. Jaehyun's hips pressed against your own as his chest did the same with your own. 

"Jaehyun." You whispered softly, squeezing his hand in his own.

Despite the gentle whisper, Jaehyun had no intentions proceeding without anything more, pressing his lips to your shoulder through the fabric of your shirt, "Hm?" He hummed out, pulling away slightly to look at you, "What's wrong?"

"I just didn't think we'd share a moment like this in the locker room." You chuckled shyly, looking at him, "Not that I'm complaining, it's kinda hot, but..."

Jaehyun cupped your chin, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead, "I understand." He whispered, "How about this? I'll get dressed and then we can head back to my place — or yours, I'm okay with either."

You nodded softly, climbing off his lap and sitting on the bench while he stood up to get dressed. He pulled on his briefs with the towel around his waist, loosening it to throw over his head and dry his hair. 

You looked around the locker room to avoid getting caught staring, admiring the red and black walls, the Sentinels logo in the center of the wall. You over analyzed every detail; how crooked the logo was, how some of the red bled into the black, even how there were smudges of paint left on the lockers. Maybe you were being a bit too critical; after all, you weren't an artist and sometimes mistakes happen. You began to beat yourself up because why would you criticize art if you couldn't even draw a stick figure, let alone a giant logo like the Sentinels had. Maybe you'd take an art class.

When you looked back at Jaehyun, he was dressed in his usual attire, the attire you were most accustomed to. The grey, baggy cargo pants, the black muscle tee, the backwards Sentinels baseball cap. He looks just how you were first introduced to him, and it was comforting. He grabbed his bags and wrapped his arm around your shoulder as he led you out of the locker room.

"Hey! There they are." Johnny called, a half eaten corn dog held in his hand, "We were looking everywhere for you two."

Yeri held the paper boat of nachos in her hand as she gave you a knowing look, biting into a cheese and jalapeño covered chip.

Mark breathed heavily, "I ran around the entire stadium looking."

Jaehyun chuckled, shaking his head, "You guys didn't have to do that." He smiled, "Well, we're gonna head out."

"Why don't we get something to drink as celebration?" Johnny suggested, taking a bite of the corn dog.

"Sorry. Have plans." Jaehyun shrugged, guiding you past the three of them. 

Yeri took another bite of her nachos, "Wear protection!" She called, more so to you than Jaehyun, or at least you think so.

"Dude, ew!" Mark's laugh echoed off the walls as you and Jaehyun walked off.

Jaehyun was on a mission trying to get you both to the car so you both could get out of there and relieve some sexual tension. Not only did he have to deal with some of the teammates of him stopping him, he also had to deal with team managers, coaches, and some fans of him that were begging for autographs and photos; which he gladly accepted, because he wouldn't be anything without the people who supported him. That continued the whole entire way as you both walked to the back of the stadium where he parked earlier in the morning. 

Jaehyun slowly peeked out of the door before he closed it as soon as he opened it, "Here." He whispered, swinging the backpack to his side and pulled out some sunglasses, "There's gonna be a lot of cameras flashing, so wear these and only look straight ahead." 

You nodded, pulling on the sunglasses. Jaehyun grabbed your hand in his own, and slowly opened the door again, guiding you out with him. And that's when you understood what Jaehyun meant; the flashes of the cameras were speeding in at one per second. Jaehyun was used to it, but you definitely weren't. He gave a nod, a wave, even a handshake to paparazzi, keeping you close to his side. There was a security guard that helped you both make way to the car. You wondered how so many people were able to obey one security guard, let alone with that many people.

The car was inches away from you both, Jaehyun's fingers grazing the handle to the passenger side door, helping you inside. 

"Jaehyun, is that your girlfriend?" A paparazzi shouted, continuing to take pictures, most likely blurry from the nudging and shoving from other paparazzi. Since when did athletes have the same amount of paparazzi as superstars. 

Jaehyun shut the door, giving you a smile as he shoved the bags into the backseat, "Yeah, she is." He responded to the paparazzi, shutting the door and let the security guard guide him to the driver's side. The security even went as far to check under, on top and inside the car's backseat. 

Once the security gave the go ahead, Jaehyun pulled out of the car lot, his hand immediately finding your own. 

"Sorry about that." He said, making his way back towards his place.

"Oh, it's okay." You took off the sunglasses he gave you, holding them by the nose bridge as you folded the arms, "I feel sorry you have to deal with that. No wonder you drive a Honda." You smiled.

Jaehyun laughed, "I meant saying you were my girlfriend." He glanced at you, pausing the music on his phone, "It's easier to say that than explaining we're in a talking stage, you know?"

"It's fine." You glanced at his side profile, "I know what you mean." You mumbled, "I don't mind. Being considered your girlfriend, I mean." You smiled to yourself.

Jaehyun smirked, squeezing your hand, "You sure about that?"

"Yeah."

Jaehyun nodded, playing the music to fill the silence. The music playing varied between The Weeknd, Lloyd, and even some underground artists you had no clue existed. But the one variation that they all had in common was that they were heavy intented with sexual innuendos and sexual tension. You have no idea if Jaehyun made a playlist with these types of songs or if they just happened to be playing on shuffle back to back. But either way, they were definitely setting the mood. 

Jaehyun pulled into the roundabout, grabbing his bags before passing his spare car keys to the valet and helped you out of the vehicle. 

"Why don't you park it yourself?" You questioned, reaching for the strap of Jaehyun's backpack and throwing it over your shoulders. You were genuinely curious, glancing up at him.

Jaehyun shrugged, "I don't know. They only allow employees out there. I guess it's the luxury part of the apartments." He guided you inside and to the elevator, clicking the floor button that you memorized from this morning.

You chuckled, "Do you like living here?"

"It's nice. But, I'm not much of a big house guy. I've never been interested in it." He leaned against the railing of the elevator, the duffle bag between his legs as you stood in front of him.

"So, why get a giant apartment?"

Jaehyun shrugged, "The commissioner of the team paid the lease if I agreed to join the Sents." He glanced down at his hands, "But, I'd much rather having a nice little apartment."

The elevator rung and stalled to a stop as you both reached the hallway, your hands never leaving one another's as he guided you to his door.

You felt the butterflies grow in your stomach, your heart beating in your throat and your hands clam up. Was now a bad time to say you can't remember the last time you've had sex? You really don't understand why you're feeling so nervous all of a sudden, you were both having a great conversation in the car and now, you felt like you were about to throw up.

Jaehyun pushed open the door, setting the duffel bag on the ground under the upholstered bench at the entryway, kicking off his shoes. You followed, setting the backpack down beside the bench and neatly placed your shoes next to his. You were trying to buy time to settle the butterflies in your chest by rearranging the shoes a little bit. And when you stood up, you gasped when you felt Jaehyun's hand on your own, once again. 

"If you're too nervous, we don't have to continue." He spoke in that soft voice, the same one you grew accustomed to since the night before. "I'm nervous myself."

You took a deep breath, sighing softly, "I'm nervous but... I want this."

"Are you sure?" 

"Yes."

Jaehyun stepped closer, your back pressed against the front door, he cupped your chin, his thumb brushing your bottom lip, "Can I kiss you? Is that okay?"

You nodded your head, "You don't have to ask."

Jaehyun kissed you — feverishly. Like a man starved, he pressed you against the door and kissed you like any man would with the woman they love. You felt his hands wandering again, squeezing your hips before wrapping his arm around your waist to pull you closer to him. 

His tongue found its way into your mouth, rubbing against yours. You could feel him through his pants, and he was hard. You so desperately wanted to touch him, but you didn't want to cross a boundary he might not like, so you settled for kissing him back as feverishly as he was.

A gentle groan escaped his lips as you pressed against him, a whispered "fuck" breathed into your mouth. He tapped his fingers against your thigh, silently telling you to jump up, which you obliged. He steadied you with the arm around your waist, and guided your legs around his hips as he held you effortlessly.

"You okay with moving this to the bedroom, baby?" He spoke with a gravelly voice, his lips swollen from the kiss. You felt the butterflies grow in your stomach again, your heart racing, and your panties growing wetter as he looked at you with those gentle, yet dominant eyes. You couldn't help yourself but nod.

Jaehyun smiled, carrying you over to the bedroom, crawling onto the bed and resting you on his lap as he continued to kiss at your skin, his lips trailing along your jaw, neck and shoulder. "Do you wanna continue?"

You nodded, your hand running through his hair, "I do."

Jaehyun smiled, pressing soft kisses across your face, "Okay, baby." He placed one soft kiss against your lips, adjusting his position so you were laying back on the bed, and he was between your legs. He reached over to the bedside table, pulling out a condom and looking at you softly, "Open it for me?" He chuckled.

You grabbed the packet and tore it open with your teeth, passing it to him, "Expecting a lot of play?" You teased, motioning to the box of condoms.

Jaehyun smiled, shaking his head, "Only if you want to." He nudged your leg playfully, "And I'm hoping after this, you're the only one I fuck."

You bit your bottom lip, smiling sweetly, "I haven't had any complaints yet." 

He set the condom off to the side, skillfully unbuttoning your bottoms and pulled them off your legs, throwing them off to the side.

"Oh, my—" You mumbled.

"I'll buy you a new one." He whispered, his hands pulling off his shirt, "Anything you need, I'll get it for you." His shirt was the second piece of fabric added to the growing pile of clothing, his hands pulling off your own shirt, "You're so pretty." He whispered breathlessly, "You don't understand how hard it was to keep my hands off you." 

"You shouldn't have." You smile softly, brushing your fingers through his hair as he kissed at your collarbone.

"I'll keep that in mind." Jaehyun's breath fanned against your chest, and he looked up at you, "You're so beautiful. I was hypnotized when I first saw you in person, I swear."

You laughed, "Did Mark push you to come pour my drink?"

"No, I took that initiative myself." He smiled, his fingers tangling in the waistband of your panties, "I was sick of waiting." He chuckled.

And you were sick of waiting. It's two days of complete sexual tension and it was almost painful waiting for anything more to happen. You can't remember the last time you had this much sexual tension with someone, let alone the last time someone desired you this bad.

"Jaehyun..." You whispered out, as he pressed kisses to your hip bone, "Please, I can't wait anymore."

He smiled, pressing a soft kiss to your hip once more, "You can't wait anymore?" He teased, "I spent months fantasizing about this, and you can't wait anymore?" He hummed.

"You know what I mean." You whined, feeling your cheeks blush as you leaned your head back against the pillows.

"Okay, okay, baby. I guess I shouldn't keep you waiting any longer." His dimples imprinted his cheeks, sitting up from between your legs and grabbed the condom from beside him, "You've been patient and I appreciate that." He dipped his hand into the waistband of his pants, his cock resting in his hand as he rolled the condom on, slowly pumping himself in his hand, "Fuck, look what you do to me, baby."

You wrapped your legs around his hips, using the heel of your foot to pull him closer to your heat.

Jaehyun's hand pressed against the pillow you laid on top of, guiding the tip of his cock into you, slowly pressing into you, "Oh, fuck..."

"Oh my god..." You whispered out, tangling your fingers through his hair as he pressed his chest against yours, pressing open mouthed kisses to your neck.

"I'm gonna start moving, baby."

"Mmhmm..."

Jaehyun slowly began thrusting into you, the tip of his cock pressing against your sweet spot, your toes curling and fingers tightening on the hair on the back of his head. Jaehyun's long eyelashes brushed against your jawline as he continued to press soft kisses on your neck, "So soft, so pretty." He whispers against you skin, his tongue wetting the plain, gently sucking.

Gasping, you rolled his hips up against his, "Jae," Your words come out shaky, the heat moving from your cunt up to your ears.

"Sensitive there?" He whispered, nibbling on the skin, his hand moving from your cheek to press between you two to rub his index and middle finger along your clit. 

"Fuck!" 

Jaehyun chuckled, "You're so wet, princess." He smiled, his hips continuing to press into your own, "God, I imagined how pretty you'd look underneath me for so long." His cock twitched against your walls, a moan escaping his lips, "Feels so good... Could keep fucking you forever."

The words you wanted to speak disappeared just as quickly as they appeared, listening to your thoughts echo Jaehyun as he continued to press into you. Silent babbles were occupied with whines and moans, clenching down on his dick as he moved. "Jae, Jae,"

"I gotcha, baby. I'm right here." He whispered softly, rubbing your legs, "Jae's right here."

You groaned as Jaehyun grabbed your hips, guiding you along his length, "So good..." You whined.

"I know, baby. Like you were made for me." Whispering in your ear, Jaehyun's fingers found their way to your clit once more, flicking it gently, "A pretty, soaking wet pussy just for my dick."

You jolt slightly as Jaehyun flicked you clit, a heat wave washing over your body as it blushed, simultaneously, goosebumps covered your skin from Jaehyun's words.

Jaehyun smiled softly, whispering sweet nothing against your ear, "So tight. It feels so good."

"Fuck, Jaehyun...." You whispered out, your throat straining as you attempted to speak.

Jaehyun's fingers worked against your clit, continuing the same pace of his hips, "Does it feel good, baby?" 

The words he whispered were enough to make your pussy jump, nodding your head. Glancing down at the bulge of your stomach, you couldn't help the moan escape your throat, "Oh, fuck." 

Jaehyun groaned, his hand lingering on your hip, "Look at you..." He whispered, more to himself, "Wanna fuck you everyday."

Jaehyun's voice was hoarse, his eyes staring into your own. He leaned closer, kissing your lips in contrast to the brutal pounding of his hips. He hummed against your lips, sliding his tongue between your lips and rubbed his own against yours. 

Jaehyun pulled away for a moment, looking at you, "Can I taste you, princess?"

It was a question you honestly couldn't refuse. You nodded your head, whining softly at his exit but allowed him to continue to kiss down your body, his breath fanning against your wet cunt.

Licking his lips, Jaehyun hummed softly at the white cream around your hole, "Shit..." He whispered out, pressing soft kisses against your sensitive clit.

"Jae!" You yelped as his lips pressed against you, blushing softly as another wave of heat covered your core.

Jaehyun smiled, the dimples on his cheeks making an appearance before he delved into you, his tongue licking your hole, savoring the flavor. 

You gasped softly and let your hands immediately slip through his hair, feeling the soft strands tickle the inside of your wrist. 

He was eating you out like a man starved, his fingers pressing into you as his lips and tongue danced with one another against your pussy. Jaehyun's eyes closed as he continued to thrust his fingers into you and taste you against his tongue, the cold of the ring around his finger soothing the burn of your body.

You could only handle so much more as he curled his fingers into you, gasping and whining as he teased the spongey spot inside you. Your pussy fluttered around his fingers, moaning softly, "Ri- Right there, Jae."

Jaehyun's fingers continued to rub against the spot, his tongue lapping up all your juices that dribbled onto his fingers like it was juice rolling down his hand. 

Your pussy sobbed as he continued tasting you and teasing you, feeling the warm coil break in your stomach, the creamy cum coating every line of his hand, covering the silver ring that pressed against your hole and leaving a white ring around the base of his fingers.

"Fuck," he whispered against you clit, moaning softly as he slowly moved his fingers inside you, "That was hot."

You whined shyly as he continued to press into your heat, his fingers never moving from the spot inside you, "Keep moving your fingers like that, and I'll cum again."

Jaehyun smiled, "I'm always up for a challenge." He teased, kissing your thigh, "Only if you are."

You blushed softly; how could resist such an invitation? You were so out of practice that you were out of breath only after cumming once, you had to at least repay the favor.

"Can I suck your cock?" You asked gently, sitting up on your elbows.

Jaehyun chuckled softly, moving his fingers out of your cunt, "Do you want to?"

You used this chance to adjust your position and lay across his lap, your mouth salivating at the sight of his cock, covered in the clear condom. You looked up at him with shy eyes, nodding your head.

"You gotta say it, baby." He whispered, his fingers brushing against your cheek.

"I wanna." You mumbled, entangling your fingers with his own.

Jaehyun smiled, leaning forward to peck your forehead, "Good girl." He whispered in your ear, "Go ahead." He guided you with his words, letting you roll the condom off his cock and kiss at the red cherry colored tip. A groan parted his lips as he settled his hand against your head. He didn't push, he just used it as silent praise, letting you take your own pace with what you were doing.

Yet, his hand on the back of your head almost gave you the motivation to do more; You wrapped your lips around his cock, slowly bobbing along the length, using your tongue to tease the slit of his cock. Your hand moved downward, rubbing against his sack, listening to his whines as you sucked him off.

Jaehyun glanced down at you, using his hands to move your hair away from your face and wrap it gently around his hand, "You're gorgeous." He whispered, as he admired your lips turning a swollen red, your flushed cheeks, your pretty fingers rubbing against him and your eyes lidded as you savored him on your tongue. 

Looking up at him through your lashes, you moaned at the praise, tasting the pre-cum leaking against your tongue. Pulling away with a thin string of saliva keeping you both connected as you took the moment to pump him in your hand, the pre-cum oozing from his slit.

"Fuck," Jaehyun leaned in closer, pressing his lips against yours to taste himself against your tongue, "You're so pretty." He moaned as your hand continued to move against his member.

You smiled softly, "You're not too bad looking yourself." You smiled, "Taste good too."

Jaehyun smiled softly, soft whimpers leaving his lips as you wrapped yours back around the cock head. Your finger traced the vein on the underside of his cock, drool dripping from your lips down his girth.

"Shit, f-fuck," He whined, "So close, baby. Keep going."

Listening to Jaehyun's sounds was enough to encourage you to continue until his muscles tensed, heavy pants escaping his throat. The taste of Jaehyun's cum against your tongue was like a hunger that you weren't aware you had sated. You had the taste linger on your tongue as you pulled away from his cock, swallowing the thick release.

"God, baby..." Heavy breaths, messy (but still insanely perfect) hair and flushed cheeks only suited him more, "That was perfect."

You smiled, laying back on the bed as you soak up the compliments.

Jaehyun lay beside you, wrapping his arm around your waist as he placed soft kisses against your neck, jawline, cheek.

You both continued to cuddle, letting Jaehyun fawn over you as you laid with one another until either of you fell asleep. You didn't mind being doted on. It was kinda nice.

copyright © 2024 thewonandonly. all rights reserved.

[ohmytyong]

meet-cute

⤹ now playing: the christmas waltz by frank sinatra

PAIRING: stranger!jaehyun x female!reader

GENRE: smut (minors dni!!), strangers to lovers (?) au, fluff

WARNINGS: alcohol consumption, pet names (baby), explicit sexual content; unprotected sex (!always use protection!), heavy make out, nipple play, slight hair pulling, aftercare, pretty vanilla tbh

WC: 3,4k

SYNOPSIS: you were bummed that you had to spend Christmas all alone in a foreign country after your friends left you behind. little did you you would find a charming stranger to keep you company

A/N: merry christmas to everyone celebrating! here's a little gift from me to you <3

* .♡ *:･ﾟ✧ ⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

The muffled voices of people chatting around you mixed with the old christmas song playing from the bar's speakers filled the silence of your mind like a white noise. You whiffed the sweet scent of the red wine swirling inside the glass you were holding as you moved your hand from side to side, making you aware of your surroundings.

Despite it being Christmas eve, the bar was fuller than what you had expected. You would expect people to be gathered up at their homes, eating and having fun with all their loved ones, exchanging gifts and wishes and then getting wasted, laughing at the weird relative who had some more sips of alcohol than the others.

However, it turns out more people had the same fate as you. Sitting alone, in pairs, or in small groups at probably the only open bar in milan on this jolly day. You were informed about the jazz band that usually played live music here, yet you went to the place the only day of the year that they weren't there. Though it was kinda obvious they wouldn't be here today; it's Christmas eve for God's sake.

You took a sip of your wine, closing your eyes to savor the taste. You didn't know what it was, but the bartender definitely found your exact preference; sweet and strong on the tongue which leaves a slightly bitter aftertaste at the back of your throat.

As you set the glass down at the bar counter, you noticed a gust of air on your side, signaling someone else's presence. The woody masculine cologne that engulfed your nostrils made your head turn discreetly to the side, trying to take a glimpse of the man that it belonged to.

"A glass of Johnnie please, no ice," a soft baritone voice addressed the bartender and you couldn't help but fully turn your body towards the man, angling yourself in a position that showed your interest towards him yet keeping a safe distance.

The man definitely noticed your antics. You felt his fiery gaze look you up and down, taking in your full appearance. You flipped your hair, moving it all to the back which exposed your bare shoulder and upper chest. You noticed with the corner of your eye that the man drew in a sharp breath, shifting his body from side to side on the barstool. Your technique worked.

As you stretched your arm to grab your glass of wine, your heard the man clear his throat. "Now why would a beautiful lady sit alone at a jazz bar on Christmas eve?" the velvety baritone voice asked and the question was addressed to none other than you.

You finally met the man's gaze for the first time. He was gorgeous. His jet black hair was nicely styled, parted in the middle and framing his heavenly structured face, falling a bit long at the nape of his neck. His dress shirt was sitting tightly around his shoulders and chest, in contrast with the tie he was wearing which was hanging rather loosely around his neck. His sleeves were rolled up and you noticed his arm muscles flex as he brought the scotch glass to his lips, his watch glimmering under the dim lighting.

"Funny enough, I was about to ask the exact same thing," you played along, hiding your flirty smirk behind your glass of wine.

"You're looking for a beautiful lady too?" he asked, his eyes creasing as he smiled teasingly.

You chuckled at that, covering your mouth with you hand. So he had a sense of humor. "I meant a handsome man. But whatever rows your boat," you decided to play along, flirt with him too.

His eyes were piercing. He looked at you as if he were walking for miles in the dry desert and you were an oasis just a little ahead of him, like he was desperate to drink you all up. It would be lie though if you denied that you weren't looking at him the same way.

"I mean," he said between low chuckles, "there has to be a good reason why you're here. And alone," he finished, waiting for your answer.

You sighed deeply, tapping your fingers on the counter. "I was supposed to spend Christmas with my friends but they decided to be assholes and pull a prank on me. They dumped me. Told me we were going to Milan while they are in Vienna right now," you said, downing the remaining wine in your glass in one go.

The man visibly winced at what you said, as if he was physically in pain. "I'm sorry to hear that. That's so cruel, wow," he said, reaching out a confident hand to grab your hand resting on the counter, giving it an apologetic squeeze. Oh he knows what he's doing.

"What's your excuse for being here, pretty boy?" you asked playfully and he smiled. "My story isn't as sad as yours, it's actually kinda funny. My uh- my flight got canceled. I was in Milan for work and I was supposed to go home for the holidays but..." he trailed off, pressing his lips.

"Damn, i'm sorry," you said and you decided to flirt back now. Gaining dominance over his hand, you squeezed it, rubbing circles with your thumb over the back of his hand.

You noticed his eyes fixate on the spot your bodies were touching. Without realizing it, your barstool had moved closer to his and you could feel the heat of his body radiating along with the strong scent of his cologne. You hoped your perfume hadn't worn off after hours of wearing it.

"Actually," he spoke up, removing his hand from your grip, "something good came out of all this misfortune. I'm sitting at a nice cozy place with a beautiful lady to keep me company. Not that bad, isn't it? I'm Jaehyun by the way," he offered you his name, stretching his arms for a proper handshake.

It was ironic. You had already held hands without even introducing yourselves to each other. You giggled at the gesture and he smiled at your reaction, eagerly waiting for your name and your handshake with his arm still stretched towards you.

You gave him your name as you returned the handshake. The sight of the two of you must have looked somewhat awkward from a third person's point of view, but for you the interaction between you and Jaehyun had a warmth to it.

You didn't say it out loud like he did, but spending time with a lovely handsome stranger in a foreign place on Christmas eve wasn't as bad as it sounded.

You didn't realize it but you and Jaehyun had already been talking for almost two hours. Time passed by quickly, you were having a great time with him. He was weirdly charming, flirting with you in a slightly uncomfortable way despite the aura of confidence he radiated. He cracked jokes more than you expected and always found silly excuses to touch you, anywhere he could, signaling his obvious interest towards you.

It would be a lie if you said you weren't as interested in him, if more than he was. You found yourself laughing at everything he said, and you didn't mind the soft touches of his hand here and there. In fact, you craved them even more. You craved him. After two hours of talking, you weren't sure if it was the wine, the sleepiness or the pure lust you were feeling, but you couldn't bring yourself to listen to everything he said. You were lost in his eyes, his lips, his hands, his scent. You were sober enough to understand the pure attraction you had for him.

The bar was now almost empty. You saw the bartender cleaning some tables in the back, and only two groups of friends were there beside you and Jaehyun. You took this as a signal to get leaving as soon as possible.

After arguing with Jaehyun over who gets to pay for the drinks, he ultimately won over you, being kind enough to pay for all your refills of wine. You were opposed to this at first, but his kind gesture made your want grow even more, and the aching sensation between your thighs became too noticeable to ignore.

You wrapped your coat closely around your neck as you stepped outside the bar in the crisp coldness of December. You couldn't just go back to your hotel room like this. The night was still young, and you weren't ready to leave Jaehyun just yet.

"So, any plans for the rest of the night?" you asked, trying to get some information you could use in your favor.

Jaehyun shrugged, lifting his shoulders. "Not really. I mean, I'm alone here so there isn't anything else to do during this time of the night," he said, but you noticed that he wanted to say more than that.

You decided to take initiative and help him out of his shyness. "I know it's gonna sound a bit weird but," you drew in a breath, shivering from the cold and the nervousness, "would you like to come over to my hotel room for one more round of drinks? It's almost Christmas" you said looking at your watch.

Jaehyun tried to suppress a smile that was threatening to spread on his lips. You had cracked him. You knew he wanted you as much as you wanted him, and neither of you were ready to let go of each other so easily. Besides, like he said, you were all alone here. You only knew each other and there wasn't anything more fun than to spend more time with a person you grew to like. He had no excuse to refuse your offer.

With a hesitant nod, he looked into your eyes, smiling softly as he tried to study the intentions behind your question. "Sure, why not?"

・・・・・・・・・・・・・・

Jaehyun kicked the door of you hotel room closed as he kissed you deeply, his hands resting on your back while yours were wrapped around his neck. Dropping your bag on the floor, you hurriedly took off your shoes, throwing them somewhere around the room.

Jaehyun struggled a little untying his shoelaces, but you helped him get rid of his jacket, throwing it somewhere behind him. You let your coat fall off your body, and with a quick motion your hands were back to where they were, wrapped around jh neck, pulling him close to reach his lips again.

The kiss was electric. Your entire body heated up with lust as you tasted on his lips the mixture of the different alcoholic drinks you had consumed earlier. Jaehyun slipped his tongue into your mouth, lowering his hands to the small of your back as you cupped his cheek with one hand, the other gripping the locks of his hair. In the heat of the moment, he wasted no time cupping your ass, lifting you up to wrap your legs around his waist.

On the short walk back to your hotel, you felt the constant need for him steadily rising and rising to the point you couldn't keep your hands to yourself anymore. It must've been hard for Jaehyun to keep his composure too, as he couldn't resist his urges anymore, kissing you in the elevator as you went up to the floor of your room.

You were both so needy for each other. Your tongues battled for dominance as Jaehyun lead you to the bed, dropping your body on the soft mattress as he towered above you, never breaking the kiss.

Your grip on his hair tightened, and he knew you wanted more. He attached his lips on your neck, pressing soft warm kissed along the sensitive area. He trailed his mouth from under your ear down to your already half-exposed chest and you mentally thanked yourself for choosing to wear a low-cut top. Soft moans escaped your lips as Jaehyun found all your favorite spots to kiss, smirking at the sounds that came out of your mouth.

His lips left your skin and you whined at the lack of his touch. He looked up into your eyes, searching for any type of consent, something that told him you needed him as badly as he needed you.

"What are we even doing?" he chuckled, running his fingers along your cheek.

You smiled at that. "i don't know,," you were honest with him. "But whatever it is, I like it. And I want it. Do you?" you asked him and he nodded quickly, resting his thumb on your lips.

"You have no idea" he said and in a second, his lips crashed with yours as he continued the battle of dominance you had previously started.

Jaehyun kept kissing you everywhere. No spot in your exposed body was left unattended by his soft lips, yet he needed more of you and you needed him in more places too. As if on cue, you arched your back to help him take off your top, followed shortly with an unclasp of your bra, the straps falling down your shoulders as he yanked it away. He immediately buried his face in your chest, sucking one nipple while teasing the other one with his fingers.

With trembling hands due to the pleasure, you loosened Jaehyun's tie, hastily unbuttoning his shirt. He sensed your struggle and detached himself from your boobs to help you get him undressed. Removing his shirt, he revealed his toned body to you, muscles flexing with every single of his movements. You didn't have enough time to fully appreciate his upper body as he dipped back in, not wanting to leave your nipples neglected.

Soft moans and whimpers left your lips as he kept on kissing you down your entire body, trailing your stomach down to your pants. Swiftly pulling the zipper, he slowly removed your pants and underwear, kissing your inner things along the way.

Your body jolted at the cold sensation of your naked core meeting the air in the room, and Jaehyun's mouth was so close to where you needed him the most that the thought alone made you even wetter.

Jaehyun took a step back to fully look at you. His pupils were dilated, eyes filled with nothing but lust and need. "Gosh you're so beautiful" he said in his low voice, a soft grunt escaping him as he unbuckled his belt, pulling down his pants and boxers revealing his own throbbing dick.

You gulped at the sight of his size, but it made you even more curious of how he would feel inside you. Jaehyun lowered himself above you, capturing your lips in a lazy passionate kiss.

"I really wanna take my time with you but I can't wait any longer. Do you think you can take me right now? No prep?" he asked you, the neediness in his eyes and voice so obvious, you could come undone any minute by now.

The truth is, you weren't sure if you could fit all of him inside you. But you needed him. you wanted him. The sooner the better. You couldn't take any more foreplay or teasing even though you'd like it. You just wanted to relase all the tension off your body.

"I can take it. I can take you," you said and you saw Jaehyun's eyes darken at your eager tone. He wasted no time, lining himself between your legs as he grabbed the base of his cock, bringing it to the opening of your folds.

"Are you sure you want this, Y/n?" Jaehyun asked you, waiting for your final answer, the one that would give me the green light to go.

You nodded. "yes, Jaehyun please. I want you right now," you pleaded and it was all that was needed for him to slowly thrust inside you, your velvety walls wrapping around his veiny length as he entered deeper and deeper until he bottomed out inside you, his hips touching yours.

A long moan was heard by both of you at the sensation of your bodies meeting in such an intimate way. "Fuck you're so warm" Jaehyun groaned and you moaned just at the sound he made, his eyes shut as he tried to fully feel you ad you took him all in.

Once you gave him the signal that he could move, he slowly lifted his hips, thrusting his dick in and out of your pussy, earning heavy breaths from you. Your arms searched for anchor at his toned back, digging your fingers in his shoulders as his thrusts grew faster and more eager, trying to get you to moan louder for him.

And it worked. As he kept on reaching spots so deep you never thought anyone could ever reach, Jaehyun kissed down your neck, groaning at the sound of your continuously louder moans, smirking on your skin when he pinched your nipped and you squealed, leaving out a high-pitched scream.

"You're so good at this Jae, you make me feel so good" you said in between moans and the nickname worked like magic for him. His breathing became heavier, burying his head on the crook of your neck as his thrusts became sloppier.

"Fuck you're such a good girl for me, I'm- fuck" Jaehyun's voice was mumbled as he spoke in the mattress, your moaning growing louder and louder.

"Please Jae I wanna cum, it's so good," you whispered, your breathing becoming sharper as he pressed a finger on your clit, rubbing it softly as he angled your hips higher to gain more access inside you. Your legs wrapped tight around his waist as his body was pressed closely on top of you. Jaehyun tried to kiss you, but the burning sensation between your legs kept you moaning inside his mouth, your eyes rolling in the back of your head as you reached closer to your climax.

"Jae I'm- I-" you tried to speak but the pleasure was too much for your brain to properly work.

Jaehyun never stopped nor changed his movements, quickly understanding what you like and what makes you a whimpering mess under him. "Come on baby, cum for me" he groaned as he kept on going, rubbing your clit slightly faster.

Your legs shook around his waist, a loud cry leaving your lips as you came around his cock. Jaehyun kept on going, riding you through your high as he chased his own. Hearing your soft moans, he came not long after you, warm liquid filling you up as your throbbing walls clenched around his length.

The two of you stayed like this for a while. Jaehyun only pulled out of you once his breathing was more steady, and you winced at the sudden emptiness you felt without his body inside you, or even on top of you.

Jaehyun layed for a few more seconds before he got up, searching for his boxers around the room. "I'm gonna get some tissues to clean you up, is that alright baby?" the pet name felt so natural coming from him. It was weird that it didn't really hit you when he said it during sex, but right now it made your stomach twitch.

Jaehyun went to the bathroom and came back holding some tissues. You moved your body towards him and let him clean you up from all the remaining liquids he had spilled on you. You found the gesture adorable, especially when you saw the concentration on his face, trying to leave absolutely no dirty spot on your body.

You thanked him for it and got up to find some clean clothes you could wear to sleep. Jaehyun was too comfortable getting under the bedsheets, laying in your bed as a sign that he would stay the night.

Fishing his phone from the inside pocket of his jacket, he read the time. It was way past midnight by now, and neither of you noticed how quickly time had passed when you had such a great time with each other.

His lips tugged into a playful smile before he spoke. "Look, it's past midnight. Merry Christmas!" he said as you climbed into bed beside him.

You laughed at his enthusiasm and sighed, turning to face him. If you were to tell yourself that you wouldn't spend Christmas with your friends this year but rather with a hot total stranger you came across at a jazz bar, you wouldn't believe it. But now, nuzzling into his chest, hearing the slow and steady beating of his heart, you were content with this turn of events.

You cupped the side of his face and his cheek rested heavy in your palm as he leaned his head to your touch. You pressed a soft peck on his lips, smiling. "Merry Christmas".

* .♡ *:･ﾟ✧ ⋆ ࣪.* ࣪.⋆

TAGS: @peachjaem00 @bbyyhyuck @vdollys @positionslab @matchahyuck

@renjun-fairy @thoughtfulqueenlady @uwuheeseungie @back2jisung @xxxx-23nct

@markleefuckme @letmein2urheart

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[whereisten]

Promises

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | more coming soon..

“I make no promises, I can't do golden rings, but I'll give you everything tonight”

Pairing: Mafia Leader!Jaehyun x female reader (bakery/cafe owner)

Genre: Friends to lovers au, fluff, smut and angst

Warnings: gun and violence mention, blood mention, murder, stalking, alcohol mention, Minors DNI! Smut (unprotected sex, knife play, impregnation kink, rough sex, overstimulation, public sex, car sex)

Word Count: 13k

((A/N: WELL...its been some time, I apologize :( We got two new characters hehe! Also, if you are. jjk fan, the getou version is on our AO3 ;) I hope you enjoy this part, there will be a few more, Im thinking of actually publishing this one so I would love to receive feedback if you have any! Thank youuuu <3)

-------------

[A month later]

“Hey..what do you want to drink?” Your friend taps your shoulder to awaken you from your daze.

With the music booming and the lights flashing, you’d think you’d be wide awake in the club, but the truth was you were thinking about him.

You missed him. You missed his smile, his voice, his comfort. Sure, he was mean when he left, but it didn’t stop your heart from falling in love with him. Although, your mind knew better. He wanted nothing to do with you, so why think about him?

“I’ll take cranberry vodka.” You nod at her.

After a few minutes she hands the drink to you and smiles. “I’m so happy you got a break. Let’s go dance!”

And so you down your drink and head to the dance floor, doing your best to push his image and touch out of your head.

You twirl around, moving your hips freely to the music and feeling your head become heavier by the second.

After nearly 20 minutes you stumble towards the back in search of the bathroom.

“It’s down the hall, honey.” Another bartender points.

You sigh as you relieve yourself. Few things felt as good as peeing while drunk. You look at yourself in the mirror, laughing at how dizzy you felt. But damn were you hot, you went with the perfect dress tonight, how could you not get any attention from the men out there?

Well, you’ll just have to try again, you thought to yourself and stepped out after washing your hands. The only problem with this plan is that you accidentally turned in the opposite direction and left through the back door of the club.

By the time you realized and turned around to get back in, the heavy metal door slammed shut. “Shit.”

You balance yourself on the wall and walk around, and just as you turn the corner you see something familiar.

It’s Jaehyun’s car.

Your eyes widen, your brain immediately pushing away your desire for any male attention other than his. Wait, why are you like this? He doesn’t want you, remember?

But still, it wouldn’t hurt to get a glimpse of him, right?

You walk towards his car and look up at the building it’s parked in front of.

The building is dark, except for one floor with lit up bulbs. Tipsy and without a plan, you head up to it.

The area is sketchy so you really shouldn’t be snooping around, but you text your friends you’ll be back.

As you approach the level, you hear a lot of talking and arguing. You then peek through a hole in a wall separating the hall from the lit up room and see a man tied up in a chair with a bag over his head.

You look to the left to see Jaehyun. The man of your dreams wears a black t-shirt and jeans, and still looks wonderful.

Your eyes widen when you see him wiping a knife with a long blade clean, blood stains the cloth and you breathe heavily as you notice that the man’s arm is dripping in blood.

“It’s a pity you won’t tell us what we need, we’ll find it out anyway..” His familiar voice echoes in the warehouse. 

“You can try to drink your problems away but you’ll never escape me.” Jaehyun smiles wickedly at him. It’s a sinister smile that would send anyone running, but not you, of course not. You strangely have the adverse reaction, needing to see that face, one he’d give you as you look over your shoulder to see him ruining you from behind. 

Stop.

That’s your drunk mind talking. He was right, no matter how much you drank, you’d never escape him.

Nonetheless, it seems they’d caught the man at the bar you were at right before you got there.

Another henchman brings a crying and tied up woman out from another room and throws her onto the floor in front of the man. The gang member then takes the covering off of the man’s head and the man screams a blood curdling scream as he sees the woman on the floor.

“Your wife has been through a lot already, Leonidas..put her out of her misery now by just telling us the truth..” 

Her husband won’t budge, shaking his head and repeating “I’m sorry..I’m sorry I can’t” over and over. You swallow hard. Your hands start to tremble. What is Jaehyun’s plan if he still refuses to cooperate?

And then, one of Jaehyun’s men kicks her in the stomach repeatedly, making her spew out blood. You squint and look away, but the sound of her screams of agony pierce your ears. 

You start to cry, covering our mouth to quiet your own sobbing.

“Do you really want to see how ugly this gets?” Jaehyun marches over then stabs her thigh.

You gasp as your eyes widen. No. How could he do this to an innocent woman?

The sight is messy and you turn away again. You shouldn’t be here, you have no business watching this. This can’t be the same man that you daydream about. This can’t be the man that you served pastries and coffee to, or the one that made sure you got home safe every night. You feel sick to your stomach.

The man is still silent, Jaehyun rolls his eyes before leaning down in front of him. “She will suffer because of you, is that really what you want?”

The man looks at his wife who is curled up on the ground and in tears. “Please..forgive me.”

“Leonidas! Please!!” She begs while reaching out for him.

Jaehyun steps back and nods towards another henchman who picks up a gun and shoots the lower part of the woman’s spine before your brain can even comprehend what is happening. The sharp sound nearly deafens you, but you still don’t run away. 

Jaehyun looks back at the man as he winces from seeing her writhe like a fish out of water. “Now..she’s paralyzed, was it worth it?”

You step back, but you’re suddenly grabbed up by the collar and dragged into the room by one of the members. 

“Hey! Ow!”

He throws you onto the floor, making you jam your knees onto the concrete.

“Look what we got here boss, a snitch.”

Jaehyun turns to you as you curse out. “Shit! Let me go!”

His eyes widen as he breaks his intimidating presence for a moment. “What the hell?!”

“Do you want us to tie her up?” The man grabs you up by your hair as you grunt. You raise your hands in an effort to scratch his strong arms.

“No! Get your hands off her!” Jaehyun hurries over.

The man lets your hair go, making you fall to the floor and grunt.

Jaehyun quickly places the gun down and helps you up. He grabs your wrist, tighter than ever before, nearly crushing your bone as he drags you out and into the hall. “Ow! Jaehyun..you’re hurting me!”

“What the fuck are you doing? Are you crazy?!” He tosses you into a wall, and the fact that you look amazing tonight still doesn’t stop him from being upset about you being there.

“I’m-I’m sorry, I just...I saw your car and -I wanted to see what you were up to and..” you start to sob.

“Why?!”

You sniffle, still tipsy, you can’t hold back the truth. “I missed you and I think..I think I love you.”

His brows furrow. “Love? You can’t fucking love me..”

“Those people..Jaehyun, I…I saw what you did, why are you doing this?”

“Did you like what you fucking saw?! Can you still love me after this? This is what I do, y/n. Get that through your thick skull! I’m not a nice fucking person, I hurt people!” He is infuriated, he doesn’t try to calm you down as you cry harder. He should take a moment to remember that you're probably drunk out of your mind right now, but in his anger, he can't seem to think of that fact.

He’s frightening, you can’t help but tremble under him. His face is filled with fury, and it’s the same face you saw the night he saved you from those two men, but you’re not so sure if you’re as lucky as you were last time.

“I’m sorry-it’s just..I didn’t expect you to—“

“To what?! What y/n?!” He steps closer as he yells.

“Kill innocent people!” You finally let out.

He nods. “Innocent?? What- well! Merry fucking Christmas, hope you liked your surprise. This is exactly why you should stay away from me! You don’t know me! You don’t want to know me! And I don’t want to see you again, do you understand?!”

You don’t respond, you only cry into your hands.

He grabs your wrist again to pull you back into the room.

“Hold her still!” He points to two large men who hold your arms up.

“Jaehyun..stop..please..I’ll leave..” You heave. He picks a gun from the table up. 

“No!! Don’t do this..you don’t have to! There’s another way..Jaehyun..please!!”

The man and woman beg him as well, pleading loudly as they desperately try to escape the men and rope that keep them in place as well.

He shoots the husband and wife 3 times each, making you jump and turn away.

You push the henchmen away from you and wail while on the floor. 

“Look at me!” Jaehyun commands.

He bends down and takes your chin into his hand, forcing you to look into his eyes as his fingers dig into your cheeks. He looks into your wet, red eyes, but not an ounce of regret flows through him. You had to see this, you had to hate him. Only then could you truly want this separation.

He hated to see you cry, but it was necessary. If you saw him as a saint, if you fell in love with who you thought was a “good man” only to find out how evil he is further down the line, it would only hurt more.

“This is who I am..you shouldn’t..you can’t love me..now get out of here.”

He lets you go. You quickly scurry to your feet.

You run as far as you can while crying, a million thoughts run through your head, the loudest being “how could you be so stupid to fall in love with a gang leader?”

Jaehyun turns to one of the men who starts to put their guns away.

“You just killed our lead, boss.”

Jaehyun stares at the dead man who should’ve provided key information as to where enemy shipments were docking.

“The bastard wasn’t going to tell us anything, he even let his wife die..tomorrow, we’ll see if his friend is just as selfish.”

Jaehyun puts his jacket on and heads out without another word.

On his drive back home, he thinks about everything that happened and if he had to do what he did. The truth is he had to kill them. The minute his guy dragged you into the room, this was decided. Should the man and his wife be let free, they would quickly expose your identity to his rivals and put your life at risk, and he couldn’t have that happening. You messed things up and didn’t even know. To make matters worse, based on his reaction everyone in the room could tell you were special to him. 

He lays down in bed and tries to sleep, but after tossing and turning, he decides he should just go to the gym to take out his frustrations.

The punching bag becomes his main target. With every punch he thinks of how he felt when he yelled at you. Why was he so rough? You just confessed your love and this is how he reacts? He doesn’t deserve you. He knew that from the very beginning and his greed and lust still pushed it. He knew it because he didn’t want to just say ‘goodbye’ after having sex with you, he wanted to stay and hold you close, hugging you until the sun rose. 

He wanted to whisper sweet words as he watched you sleep in his arms. He had never wanted this from any sexual partner before. Thus, he realized he loves you too, he always will and for that reason he cannot put your life at risk. 

He sweats large drops of salty water as he pants.

He sits on the bench, wondering if he should call and apologize for being too harsh on you. He plans on leaving you alone, but the least he could do is apologize first.

He picks the phone up and stares at your unsaved number. But after a few seconds, he decides not to call, putting the phone back on the bench beside him and picking up his water bottle instead.

As he gulps it down, and as he does, he remembers how drunk you were and can’t help but wonder if you got home safely. So he picks the phone up and checks your location.

You’re home.

He sighs. He should stop by and see if you’re awake. 

No. He shouldn’t

But once again, Jaehyun can’t resist you.

He uses a lock pick to get into your apartment easily, making note of how he should really get you a chain lock for the inside.

He walks in slowly and quietly before pushing your room door open slightly. And there you were, curled up in bed and snoring lightly. It was nice to know you were sleeping soundly, but he knew his words and actions cut deep this time, maybe too deep to recover from.

He observes your cute face, your brows furrowed slightly and your lips pursed. To be with you—no—to even look at you is a privilege, one he did not deserve.

He places a soothing cream for your wrist on your nightstand as well as a hangover cure drink, then turns to leave.

You take in a sharp breath, causing him to turn around swiftly. Did you wake up?

You breathe heavily, your eyes move quickly under your lids.

“No..no..” You mumble and groan. Your breathing quickens. It sounds like you’re on the verge of a panic attack.

Not knowing how else to help you before it’s too late, he quickly lays down in bed beside you and hugs you from behind. “I got you, baby, it’ll be okay shh.”  

He holds you in his arms until you start to breathe normally again. Your eyes never open. 

I could stay here..just tonight..it wouldn’t hurt, would it? He already knows the answer. He tells himself he is doing this to help you, but he knows he’s doing it for his own selfish reasons. To be able to feel your warmth, to smell your hair, to listen to you breathe in the stillness of the night, that’s why he does it.

Your eyes open slightly but he can’t see, you try to process what exactly is happening while panicking for a moment, but then it clicks. His cologne surrounds you just as his arms do.

Jaehyun.

He was hugging you close as you dreamt.

You decide to close your eyes and enjoy your last moment with him, with the man you could only know now as a cold hearted killer.

After a few minutes, he slowly releases you from his hold and gets out of the bed. 

You both needed to be away from each other for now, so he silently leaves your apartment and heads home.

You wake up the next morning alone and with a splitting headache.

You rub your temple, squinting as the sun peers through your window. Then, you feel another aching pain. 

You look down at your wrist and it all comes back to you.

“Shit.” You whisper to yourself. 

What happened the night before was real..very real actually. Jaehyun made it clear that he wasn’t interested in you anymore, so now the only thing you can do is move on and try to forget him. Try.. at least try. You get up and get ready for work after downing the drink he left for you on your nightstand. That strange bastard. How can he care for you, but hurt you at the same time?

[One Month Later]

Jaehyun mustered up the courage to face you finally. He just couldn’t bear it anymore. Every day he had to watch you travel your usual route from home to work as a little dot on his phone screen. He refused to do it any longer. He had to see you, hear from you, touch you..hold you. It’s the only way he’d feel sane again.

He sits at his usual spot, meanwhile, you didn’t notice he’s even opened the door. Why? You’re too caught up in a conversation with another man. You smile and laugh a bit too much for his liking. How could you? How could you share your happiness with another man while he aches for you?

How and why are you flirting with another customer? And in just a few minutes he hears it. 

 “Thank you Johnny, I’ll see you next time.”

You even call him by his first name? 

The man takes his bag of bread and heads out with a small smile.

Jaehyun looks back at you, only to catch you smiling hard as Johnny leaves.

But then, your smile fades when you see him.

You flinch when you see him at your counter and he notices. He really did scare you that night. He thinks to himself. His heart does hurt when he remembers how badly he messed up, but his mind is enraged with the thought that you may have moved on.

You look away and start to wipe down the counter. 

“Do you know all your customer’s first name’s now?” Jaehyun says as he tilts his head. You ignore him. 

You look over your shoulder to the back.

“Mark! There’s someone out here who needs help”

“Ok!”

You resume your chore, scrubbing an already clean surface as you try not to face Jaehyun. He controlled your every thought night and day. He’s no good for you, you know that, and you figured distance and time would help. Yet, here he was. Never allowing that theory to come true as he closes in on distance and takes up your time.

Mark looks around nervously. You hired Mark shortly after that incident so you could 1. Not be alone with any creeps and 2. Get some help in the bakery. There’s no way you can handle all the work yourself. 

He clears his throat. “What would you like to order?

Jaehyun chuckles, “A minute with the owner.”

Mark sighs then looks back at you while you place fresh cookies on the display. He turns back to Jaehyun and pouts. “Unfortunately, we don’t have that”

Jaehyun frowns. He feels like an asshole for how he acted. Technically, he had no right to be upset with you, and he only came to apologize. You don’t owe him a word and you’re clearly upset, so there’s no point in making your pain last longer.

Mark sighs and walks away.

“Y/n..how I acted that night..was completely unacceptable. I was..worried about you, but I made a fool of myself and went too far. You don’t deserve that, and I’m so sorry. I understand why you don’t wish to speak with me..but I will never stop hoping that one day you do.” He stands up.

You look him in the eyes, holding back tears as your chest rumbles.

”Please leave if you don’t plan on ordering anything.” You say through thin lips.

You head to the back office as Mark takes over the front. 

You try to act like you don’t care but deep down you do. and as you sit at your desk, you lay on your arms and wonder what should you do. Why does your heart feel so heavy with guilt? You’re the one that’s hurt, right? You deserve better, so just wait for it. But no..you want him, you can’t deny it. He was terrifying that night, he went too far. 

However, as news surfaced about the couple he killed, mysteriously found dead in the woods, the truth about their wrongdoings came to light. They used money from drug trafficking to start up their own ring of slave trafficking, a completely new level of crime. You remembered enjoying coffee one night while closing. You asked Jaehyun if his job entailed hurting innocent people and he assured you he didn’t, turns out, he was right. 

Long story short, he saved a few innocent lives by taking care of those rotten demons. He is an interesting variation of Batman.

He still scared you though, that you wouldn’t deny.

Jaehyun is dissatisfied with you ignoring him, but he leaves you alone.

[The Next Month]

“Happy Birthday Mark!” You and your friends yell out at the busy nightclub.

Mark smiles widely and thanks everyone before putting two soon-to-be-emptied bottles up in the air. 

You dance the night away and do some drinking yourself. You bump hips with Mark and throw your hands in the air while having an amazing time. The lights flash, the music is nearly deafening and the floor shakes under your feet. It’s nice to let go.

“Want another shot?” Mark pushes his hair back while leaning towards you.

Feeling quite tipsy, you shake your head. “I’m good!” You didn’t need things to go south like they did the last time you got drunk.

Mark hugs you tightly before running off to the bar. You laugh while watching him prance away without a care in the world.

A few feet away from you sits the club's owner. He takes a long drag from his cigarette and lets it rest inbetween his fingers while leaning back.

“Let’s dance, babe…it’s too boring here!” The girl in a tight hot pink dress sitting beside him runs her hand over his thigh. He brushes her away and scoots further down on the couch. 

“I’ll tell you what..go ahead and dance and if I like the way you move, I’ll join you.”

She jumps up and runs to the floor, still oblivious to the fact that his attention has been on someone else the entire time.

“Hey.” You hear a low voice call out from behind. You turn to see a tall man with blue hair gazing down at you with wide eyes. 

Why not? You think to yourself. It’s been a while since you’ve felt the embrace of a hot guy.

You start to dance, letting the music flow through your bodies as they grind against each other.

He runs his hand along your throat, tilting your chin so that he can access your lips from behind. You can feel his steamy breath hit your bottom lip, you’re so close and then-

You’re separated. 

“What the fuck, dude?” The man lets out when he sees a girl in a tight pink dress walk away after bumping into the two of you hard.

“Sorry about that.” a male voice calls out from behind you. You turn and gasp.

Jaehyun.

“She got a little carried away.” He walks after the girl. Your heart drops. Did he just brush past you like that? Not even a glance or “hi.” Are you really nothing to him?

You shouldn’t be surprised. You’re the one that cut things off. So why does it hurt so bad to see him with someone else?

“You good?” The blue haired man interrupts your thoughts. 

You force a smile. “Yeah..yeah for sure! Do you..want to go to the bathroom?”

He smiles widely and takes your hand. The two of you struggle to make your way through the crowd and towards the back to continue your makeout session. 

Jaehyun watches you and sends a message to one of his men.

He tells them to lock the bathroom doors. He knew you were less likely to make out with the guy in public like this.

He had to stop it.

“Hey! You said you like the way I move, let’s dance!” The girl grabs his arm.

He pulls away, gently taking her hand off of him. “I’ll be right back.”

He hurries to the back where he sees you both struggling to open the door. Suddenly, the power is cut off. You can’t see anything and now the guy's hand has left yours. Everyone yells and screams. Some screaming out of fear, some screaming out of excitement. It’s chaos, but after just 10 seconds, the flashing lights and music come back on.

Your makeout partner, however, is gone.

You look everywhere for the handsome blueberry, but he’s nowhere to be found. 

“Shit.” You say quietly then head back to the dance floor to look for Mark and your friends.

Jaehyun owned the club so it didn’t take long for him to get what he wanted. Power off? Got it. Bathrooms closed? Done. Blue haired guys get kicked out for no reason? Absolutely.

You push your way through the crowd and bump into Jaehyun again. This time, the girl he was with earlier has an arm around his neck while dancing against his chest. He has a cigarette in his mouth, but gives you a sly smile when he sees you watching them.

She grinds on him but his eyes are focused on you. His dark eyes are hard to resist, boring holes into your skull and making your clothes feel even tighter than they were before. You swallow hard then turn away quickly and continue to look for Mark.

The night goes on and you continue to dance with your friends. It’s not until about 3 AM that everyone is ready to leave.

You wait for an UVER outside with a hammered Mark.

“Boss. That was..so..fun..” he slurs out.

“I’m glad you had a great time.” you laugh out as he rests his head on your shoulder.

30 minutes have passed and UVER drivers have either declined the ride or not shown up at all. “What the hell is going on?”

Other people had their designated drivers and were heading home already. The night air starts to feel extra chilly when you realize it’s just the two of you outside now.

“Busy night?..” a man says as he drives up to the front of the club.

You look into the car. “Yeah it seems like-“ your face drops.

“I can drop you guys off if you’d like.” Jaehyun continues.

You step back. “We’re good..thank you.”

“Please y/n..you’re on the way anyway.”

“I said we’re fine! Just leave us-“

Mark stumbles to the ground, falling face flat. 

“Shit!” You yell out then try to pick him up.

Jaehyun hops out of the car to help you.

“The UVER should..ugh..be here in a few minutes.”

Jaehyun leans Mark against his car and looks at you with a serious, almost scary expression. “Are you lying to me?”

You roll your eyes. “Why are you talking to me like I’m a child? Just leave us alone.”

“I’ll wait until it gets here.”

“We don’t need you to do that” 

“It’s my choice, I won’t go home until everyone else does.”

“Oh, are you pulling a Batman again?”

“Come on y/n, think about the surge rates..”

You look away and cross your arms.

“I was a dick, I know-“

“Was?” You raise an eyebrow.

“But let me make it up to you, I’ll drop you both off, he can get rest and you can get home safely..please.”

You look at your phone and sure enough UVER has boosted the price 5x.

You look at Mark then at Jaehyun. “Fine.”

He helps you put Mark in the car. He sleeps and lays on his side on the backseat.

You then sit in the passenger seat with your hands in your lap. A few minutes pass and Jaehyun can’t help it.

“How are you?”

“I’m fine.”

He nods. 

“Did you like the nightclub?”

You don’t respond this time, you only look out of the window as he drives.

A few seconds pass and only Mark’s snoring fills the tense air.

“We worked hard on it, changed the tiles, redid the bar, and-“

“How are you always conveniently popping up?” You ask him angrily.

“You can’t just come to my club and not expect to see me, y/n..” he says smoothly.

You turn to him.

“My..club?”

He can’t contain his laughter “oh you had no idea huh?”

“You never told me you owned a nightclub..” 

“I never told you much about my job, baby”

You shiver when he says “baby” in such a low tone. 

You scoff. “Job..if that’s what you call it.” You roll your eyes and relax into the seat.

‘And that’s why it didn’t work’ is what you want to say, but you don’t.

“I also didn’t know you started smoking again.”

Jaehyun can’t help but smile. You’re worried about him, and it shows in how much attention you give him. You still care.

“I didn’t..just needed a little something tonight.”

“Good. I hate the smell.”

He looks at you to see if you realized your mistake. 

“Does it matter anymore? I’m never near you..” He tilts his head.

“Oh…right.” You say quietly.

He clears his throat. “How have you been though? Is the business doing well?”

“I don’t want to talk, Jaehyun.” 

And there it is. You shut him out again. Was what he did that bad? Yeah, he may have killed a person..two people..in front of you..twice, and yeah, he may have yelled and said awful things. But did it warrant this treatment from you? Well..yes. You’re too good for him, he needs to remember that. He swallows hard when he comes to the realization that he will never stop trying to get you back. Whether it takes 1 month, 5 years, or a decade, deep down, he will always want you. 

He waits for a few minutes to pass then he tries again.

“Come on sweetheart, we can start over.” He grips the steering wheel tightly with one hand.

The slight airiness in his voice sends you back to the night you had with him. His sweaty skin against your body, his large hands gripping you tightly enough to wring you dry. All while he pants and leans into your ear to call you “sweetheart.”

You close your legs tightly and shake the memory away.

You chuckle. You can’t believe the audacity of this man.

“First of all don’t call me that…and it seems to me you’re already starting something with another girl.”

“Oh?..did that upset you?”

You turn to him. “Seeing a cold killer dance with someone? No..no I’m not upset at all, I feel bad for her.”

he glances at Mark to make sure he’s still sleeping. “A killer? Me?” He chuckles.

“He’s passed out, and even if he wasn’t I’d kill you if you laid a finger on him.”

“Oo a threat?, I’d like to see you try, I wonder if you’d start trembling again?”

“Oh fuck off.” You roll your eyes.

“What about that Johnny guy? What’s his deal?”

You bunch your brows. “Oh did that upset you?”

Jaehyun shakes his head and looks into the road sternly. “You guys just seem close, that’s all.”

“You think I’m sleeping with every customer I know on a first name basis now?”

“No-that’s not-“

“Yes, Jaehyun, you caught me. I’m fucking Johnny and other customers before and after work every day, happy?”

He turns to you, clenching his jaw and narrowing his eyes. 

“Don’t do that.”

“Don’t do what?” You turn back to him.

“Don’t get sarcastic with me.”

“Or what?”

Just then Mark snores loudly, so loud you jump in your seat. The two of you burst out into laughter.

The rest of the drive is silent. You both help Mark into his apartment, then Jaehyun drives you to yours.

He lets you out at the loop right in front of the building. “Do you want me to walk you up?”

You turn to him before stepping out of his car. “Since when do I need help to get to my apartment?. Goodbye Jaehyun.”

He takes your hand. “I..I’m sorry.”

“I know you are.” You withdraw it from his hold and walk away. 

The night ends just like countless other nights have ended for him, he dreams about you, grasping the sheets on his bed, hoping to feel your skin just once. Eventually, he gives up and either works out or stands in front of his floor to ceiling windows with a cigarette in hand while watching the sun rise.

[Two Weeks Later]

Jaehyun holds your hand gently, helping you into the massive teacup you’re about to ride in together. It’s been a great day at Disney, and now with the sun setting, casting a warm glow onto your lover's face, you enjoy one last ride together.

The cups spin and spin, making you slide up and down the curved bench inside. Jaehyun giggles and reaches out for you to hold you close. You rest in his broad arms, time seems to stand still for a moment. You only feel the peace of the air in between you, the longing gazes, and the golden hue of the sky. 

His smile fades into a frown. “I’m sorry sweetheart..”

Your brows bunch together. “Sorry? About what?”

You’re jolted awake by the sound of your vibrating phone.

“Damn it..” you rub your eyes before grabbing your phone. Another stupid dream about your stupid ex-wait, could you even call him that?

You yawn while scratching your head. “I really gotta stop doing that.” But you can’t control your dreams, they manifest from what your heart wants. Nonetheless, you unlock your phone to see what the notification is.

It’s a text

Banker: let’s meet to discuss a few things about your application.

You nod to yourself. “Perfect.”

You knew what the Banker meant when he said he wanted to meet up. In exchange for him tweaking a few things on your loan application, you’ll satisfy his..specific needs. Will this be your proudest moment? Probably not, but you need to do what you need to do.

You swallow hard. Jaehyun’s face of disappointment enters your mind. 

“Ugh…” you lay back down in bed. He did have a point. Why should you sell yourself when someone you actually like is willing to give you money for just existing?

Then you remind yourself. Where is that money coming from? It’s blood money, and you want nothing to do with it.

And sure, he’d be disappointed, but what does that change? At the end of the day you still have a stack of bills that are starting to tilt like the tower of Pisa on your dining table. 

“Wait..what he thinks doesn’t matter.” You sit back up in bed and laugh to yourself.

You: Okay

[The Next Day]

Jaehyun pours the milk over his cereal before exhaling loudly. He still regrets how he acted with you, he misses you more than anything, but what can he do to fix everything? The truth is he knows he’ll have to let you go, you deserve better anyway. You deserve peace and a partner that can help you run your business. A partner that will bake with you then go over your finances together. 

Jaehyun sits down while imagining what he thinks is the life you deserve. You and your partner could eventually offer catering and delivery services for your bakery, you could hire more people so you wouldn’t have to work so hard. And then you’d have time for kids-

Kids..

Jaehyun’s smiles fondly. “She’d be a good mom…”

All of this can and will happen..just not with him. He needs to let you go, for the thought of you being with someone else is just too hurtful. The time is now, he needs to change now. And the first step is deleting the tracker app.

He unlocks his phone and opens the app for the last time. “She’s probably at the bakery right now..”

But no…you’re not at the bakery. You’re in a random parking lot.

He chews slowly and stares with a puzzled expression.

Any plans that you made would likely be in your text or map history, so he decides to take a look at your recent texts.

He puts his spoon down, standing straight up as what he sees shocks him to his core.

“The fucking banker.” 

Jaehyun grabs his jacket and runs out.

He’s furious especially since you already tried doing it this way and he stopped it. How could you do this to him? How could you do this to yourself? He speeds to your location.

Meanwhile, you and the banker sit in his car in the middle of a relatively empty parking lot. You sit nervously in the passenger seat.

The banker tells you that he went over your profile and application, and he’d be happy to approve your loan with the minimum interest. 

You’re ecstatic and relieved. “Oh my god…that’s amazing, thank you!”

The 50-something year old looks into your eyes and nods. “I made it work for you.”

“I appreciate that..”

He leans forward and stares at your lips. “You are so beautiful, I had to do something to help.”

You take a deep breath and try to accept what’s happening, but you can’t bring yourself to meet him halfway.

He opens his eyes. “Oh..is this too much? I’m sorry, I-“

“Oh no..it’s fine..but I’m..not ready yet..”

He looks defeated, and sits back in his seat.

The guilt starts to rip through you, he isn’t pushy or aggressive. He genuinely is helpful, but the attraction just isn’t there. 

You break the silence. “I’d rather let you touch me.” 

You’re quiet and shy, a stark contrast to how you are with Jaehyun because deep down, you don’t really want it.

“Oh..really?”

You nod.

He leans forward, biting his bottom lip as he reaches out. He caresses the warm skin of your neck before moving his hand further down to your shoulder.

You swallow hard as the man pushes your strap off your shoulder slowly, then drags his thumb over your bra. 

“Is this okay?” He asks. You nod, desperate to have him finish quickly so you can go home and relax. He puts his other hand into his pants.

Yes, finally-just get it over with and-

*crash*

The driver window suddenly shatters as someone punches through it.

You scream as you watch the masked man covered in black attire from head-to-toe punch the banker through the window in seconds. There’s glass everywhere, on the floor, in your lap, and all over the banker’s clothing and hair.

He then grabs him by the collar and drags him out of the car through the space created by the broken window.

The banker screams, but the man holds the banker up by the collar and chokes him until he loses consciousness. Your mouth falls open, he may just kill the banker.

“Stop! Please! He didn’t do anything! We were just-“

The man lets the banker’s limp body drop to the floor. You sit in silence as you watch him look down on his body for a few seconds. Then, a chill attacks your spine. He lifts his head and his focus slowly shifts to your face.

Your eyes widen. The panic sets in and you jump out of the car, running away from the masked man. 

He runs after you at an alarming speed.  His steps triple that of yours. You can’t out run him. He grabs you by the waist and swings you around. 

You flail in his arms. “Please!! Please don’t hurt me!”

He doesn’t say anything, he simply throws you over his shoulder and takes you to his black van. You sob and beg him to let you go.

He only turns back around and walks to the banker. He takes his wallet and watch then walks back to you while shoving them in his pocket. Through the small slit over his eyes you can see a menacing darkness. You have no idea what his intentions are, but you don’t think they’re good. You look around you to see rope, tape, bags of cement, bricks, and a shovel. You start hyperventilating and scurry to the corner of the van to get away from him, but he still gets closer and closer to you. 

“Hands behind you.” The man says through a voice changing box. You do as he says and place your arms behind you. He easily spins you around and ties you up with rope. He then spins you back and stares into your eyes.

“Please..let me go..I don’t even know him that well..if he owes you, just take it out on him..”

The man doesn’t say anything, he looks at your exposed shoulder and drooping bra cup now resting slightly above your nipple. He reaches over, a flinch escaping you as a result.

He keeps moving his hand until he grabs the strap and fixes your dress over your bra again. His icy fingers graze your skin.

You swallow hard and start to relax just a bit. “Th-thank you.”

He leaves the back of the van, slamming the door shut before jumping into the driver’s seat.

In a few hours, the banker is hit with the worst headache of his life. He stands up slowly and looks at his broken window. Then, it all starts to come back to him. He sighs. He doesn’t have his wallet or watch, but he’s more than happy to be alive. He heads home like nothing happened. He’s pretty sure you were kidnapped, but what could he do? He can’t tell any one of what happened or call the police because technically he isn’t supposed to be meeting with clients, especially not in sketchy areas like that.

Telling the truth would only make things harder for him. He shrugs his shoulders and turns the radio up.

Once in a secluded area, the man parks and opens the van door.

“Please let me go, I won’t tell anyone about this I-“

He takes his mask off and you gasp.

“Y-you..you fucking bastard.”

Jaehyun doesn’t respond, he unties you and with the van door still open, you dash out of the van and run.

Finally, you’re free. Just keep running and then-

You come to an abrupt halt when you realize you’re at the edge of a cliff.

“Shit.” Your eyes widen. 

“Help!!! Help me!!!” You yell but the echo only comes back to you.

“No one can hear you scream out here, sweetheart.” Jaehyun says as he walks towards you at a leisurely pace.

You walk back to him angrily. He smirks slightly.

You slap him hard. “Take me home now! I can’t believe you fucking kidnapped me!” His face swings to the left, and he steps back in surprise. He looks back at you with narrow eyes as he clenches his jaw.

“Saved you. And no, not until you explain what the hell you were doing with that creep.”

“Oh my god…I don’t even know if he’s okay..did you kill him?” Your hands grip your head.

“No, he’ll just be out for a little while.”

“Why the hell would you do that?”

“I could’ve done worse if I wanted to, you already know that.” He steps closer to you. His eyes darken, and that scary, murderous glint in them starts to show through. 

“Now..explain what you were doing…or I WILL go back and kill him so there’s no chance of it happening again.”

“You’re crazy! I don’t owe you an explanation! You mean nothing to me!” You say too fast without realizing that it was a lie and mistake.

Jaehyun is shocked, but he chuckles, tilting his head to the side in a sort of ‘well, well, well’ manner.

Is this what he needs to hear to finally let you go? 

“I-“ you sigh and your voice lowers slightly. “You know what I mean, Jaehyun. We aren’t married, we aren’t dating, we’re not even friends. Why should I explain my personal life to you?”

“So what? I’m supposed to act like I don’t fucking care?”

Your eyes widen as you walk towards him again with frantically moving hands. “Yes! Yes exactly! Because one second you do care and the next you don’t, it’s driving me crazy! What is it that you want?!”

“You already know that answer.” He tilts his head.

“God, Jaehyun. I’m done with your games.” You wave him off and turn away. 

“You didn’t want it, y/n. I saved you.” 

You flick your head back to him. “Well, Batman, guess what? I was so close to getting what I needed! But of course, you make it about yourself.” You put your hands on your hips and look back out at the cliff. “Plus, you scared the shit out of me!”

“And I’m sorry about that, but it was necessary.”

You scoff. “Necessary? You always do what you think is necessary without considering how it might affect me…”

“It’s what’s best for you, y/n.”

You close your eyes tightly. “Oh my God, you’re impossible.” 

After a few seconds of silence, you pretend to walk by him, but quickly grab his pocket knife from his front pocket. He spins around when he notices, but you press it into his neck quickly.

He chuckles before tilting his mouth into a devious smile. “You never told me you were a spy..” he says sarcastically after seeing you move with such precision. 

Truth was, after nearly getting pick pocketed, and possibly worse, on the night he saved you, you took up self-defense classes.

“I’m not playing around, Jaehyun. Take me home.” You press the blade in slightly.

He’s surprised, but he knows you won’t actually hurt him. “Come on y/n..this isn’t you.” 

He has to admit that seeing you like this did turn him on slightly. He feels a twitch in his pants as he imagines you holding the knife to his neck, riding him while you cry his name out to the heavens. Then he’d grab it from you and flip you over so he could pound into you from behind, holding the knife to your neck as he smashes his hips into you. You’d be the prettiest broken thing by the time he’s done with you.

“I’m different now, I’ve seen the things you do, I want nothing to do with you.” You were lying, you still love him. You dream about him nearly every night and your heart races when you think of him, even as you try to remember how cruel he is. 

He steps forward, forcing you to walk backwards to the van, still looking into your wide eyes. 

“W-what are you doing? Stop moving!” You blink rapidly.

“Do it, sweetheart, kill me, if I mean nothing to you…do it.” He smiles.

As turned on as he is right now, he knows that you are heartbroken because of him and now is his chance to be completely honest about his adoration of you. He needed to fix things fast. If you wanted to leave him after this, you should at least know how he feels first.

With the knife still pressed against him, he leans down closer to you. 

“I’m sorry..I’m so sorry. But I miss you..” he searches your panicking eyes before continuing. “I need you, I can’t go five minutes without wishing you were near me. You’re the only person I’ve truly..felt something with and I panicked, I don’t know what to do, I’ve never…”

You swallow hard, but don’t lift the knife away. Not yet. You need to hear more.

He pauses and looks away. “I don’t know. I don’t deserve you, I know that. But I’m a greedy bastard, I want you anyway.” His eyes float downward to your lips. Despite trembling like he expected you to, you don’t remove the knife.

“You can kill me if you’d like, that will be the only way for my mind and body to rest without you..” He continues to close the distance between you. “..but before you do, just kiss me one last time.”

Your mouth falls open. You’re stunned, still searching his eyes for a sign that he may be joking, but of course, no sign is there. The stone cold man with menacing tattoos just revealed how madly in love he is with you and you can’t do anything but stare in shock.

Your mind is telling you to run, to grab the keys, start the van, and drive home. But your heart..your body..your soul..you can’t leave him. 

You stumble and fall into the van. The knife drops out of your hand and Jaehyun leans forward, caging you in between his arms as you lay down. You breathe heavily and stare at each other’s lips.

He wants to taste them so badly, but he waits for you. It could take all night, but he’d wait for you. Just one, that’s all he asks for before this is all over.

And after waiting for a painfully long amount of time, you hold his face with your hand and kiss him. Your heads turn and your tongues explore each other.

He crawls over you, holding himself up with one arm while the other hooks itself under your leg and pushes your knee to your chest. Frantic and steamy breaths cover your bodies.

You lean forward on your elbows, starting to zip your dress down from the back, but he stops you. He picks his pocket knife up and cuts through it easily, causing an embarrassing moan to escape you. You help him take his shirt off too. The look on his face is one of pure hunger and it’s hot.

“I hate you so much.” You say softly then reach for his face again. You kiss harder, so hard your teeth clink against his. 

He leans back to get air after a few seconds then pants as he looks down at your body in a gorgeous lilac lingerie set. “You were really about to let that loser see you in this?” He tilts head while carefully dragging the knife against your bare skin.

You take in a sharp breath as goosebumps raise across it. Answer incorrectly and you could just become a kebab right then and there. But part of you wants to push him

You nod. “If you don’t love me right, I may still let him see it after this .”

His eyes narrow as his tone deepens. “Don’t..push it.”

“Don’t disappoint me..” you hold his face in one hand while looking into his eyes, easily maneuvering your way to his thick hair. He blushes then begins to kiss you as your hands run through this locs. He groans at the feeling of your fingertips on his scalp.

You giggle. “Are you blushing?”

“No..” he groans against your chest, ignoring the way his face feels like it is on absolute fire.

“Liar.” You smile and massage his scalp with your fingers. You unhook your bra and throw it to the side.

He caresses your breasts while kissing you then grabs your legs by the crook of your knees and fixes himself between them. 

“I want you too, Jaehyun..I’ve never felt this way either..but I can’t take you hurting me anymore.” You whisper. “Promise me you won’t hurt me again.”

He kisses your neck. “I promise..to love you and care for you for as long as you’ll let me, y/n.”

He leans back and takes in the sight once more. You look up at him, staring at his defined abs, impressive chest and rock hard biceps. You should’ve recognized him as the masked man from the beginning. Only he could confidently swing you around like you weigh nothing. He drags the cold tip of the knife along your thigh and then hip. You shiver at the feeling, he loves to see your chest rising and falling. 

He uses the knife to tug the fabric covering your pussy. You gasp as you feel the cold object being so close to you.

Then with a quick swipe he cuts through the left strap of your underwear that hugs your hips. “Jaehyun! I love this set! What are you-“

He cuts the other side.

You draw in a sharp breath. “Damn it.” 

“Now..no one else will have seen it but me.” He lightly drags the dull side of the knife along your cloth-covered slit to see goosebumps a little bit longer the second time. When he finally cuts the other side, he removes the wet fabric to see your flower dripping and aching for him. He licks his lips and breathes heavily. He feels he might go crazy if he doesn’t fuck you right away.

He leans down to kiss you again.

His fingers find your folds, collecting the essence. You whimper into his mouth, feeling his digits enter you slowly, stretching you out to prepare for him.

He pulls away to speak softly against your lips. “Are you going to listen to me? Are you going to obey me like a good girl?”

And in the golden hue of the setting sun, he is magnificent. You can’t help but moan and nod. You’ll say yes to anything at this point, he could tell you to walk 100 miles with him in the rain or snow and you’d agree to it.

Your eyes roll back, you shut them and bite your lip as he works his fingers, your hips rocking against his palm.

He leans back and grabs your chin with his other hand. He looks into your eyes with a dark, lustful gaze like he can’t wait to tear you apart. “Speak.”

“Yes…I’ll do whatever you say.” Your eyes round as you look up at him, feeling beautiful in (half of) your special set.

The corner of his mouth lifts slightly. “Perfect.” He pushes his pants down in one quick motion.

“Can you close the van door?” You ask innocently, trying not to look down at his long dick, tip red and swollen with pre cum leaking. He strokes it slowly, watching as you swallow hard.

And if he had time, he’d torture you by forcing you to watch him pleasure himself before decorating your belly with all that he’s saved up for you. 

He’d lick it up, then kiss you so you could taste it too. He’d lick along your opening until you beg for him to stop, then he’d be hard again and start all over. All while not letting you feel his dick.

You’d be unsatisfied like he’s been all these painful weeks without you. The desperate pleading and whiny noises that would escape you would get him there quickly too. Fortunately for you, your pussy feels so good around his fingers, he knows he’d be a fool not to paint your insides tonight.

He looks back at the quiet woods surrounding the van, no one is there, but the thought of someone actually peaking from behind a tree to watch and listen to him fuck you until you’re a sobbing mess makes it hotter. They can see how good he, only himself, can make you feel. They can grow envious of how well you take him, all while not being able to do a damn thing about it.

Of course, he’s being dramatic. No one is there. But it doesn’t mean he won’t put on a show.

He smirks when he turns back to you.

“Why? Scared someone will see you being a complete slut for me? Scared someone will hear you?”

You shake your head. “N-no, it’s just-”

He enters you quickly, pushing in so deep your body can’t help but clench in an effort to push out the penetrative object. You hold back a loud scream as he takes you suddenly.

You arch your back.

“Fuck..nno..I..” you press your hands against his chest. 

“Hmmm what was that?” He pulls out then pushes in again. You feel every ridge, every vein. Even after all this time, you still have each and every inch memorized. It’s like he owns you. Like he’s made you into his own personal fuck toy.

He grabs your waist with both hands and pulls out then pushes all the way back in like he’s trying to beat some world record for deepest penetration.

He goes even deeper than before, knocking the wind out of your chest.

This time, you can’t hold back, you scream loudly and grab his shoulders with both hands. “Jaehyun! I can’t-!”

He chuckles then places both ankles on his shoulders. He places his hand on your stomach. “Relax, my love, have you forgotten how I feel?”

He pulls out completely then pushes in again. He clicks his tongues. “Shame..now this will take more time.”

He stays in and rubs his hand along your stomach while you pant.

You push his pelvis away as your head falls back. “Too much!”

“Nothing is too..” he thrusts. “Much..” he thrusts harder then pulls out. “For..” he thrusts hard enough to shake the entire van.

“You..” he pulls out then pushes completely in again, ruthlessly fucking you to fit him. “I know my good girl can handle it.”

You whine and shake your head. “Jaehyun! Ahhh..I ca-..” he shuts you up with a kiss, licking over your bottom lip and swallowing your tongue as you cry. Your nails dig tiny craters into his back while he drives you insane.

He pulls away and kisses your jaw. “So..tight, my love.” He starts to suck your neck hard.

You feel his hands grip you tightly to hold you still. Tears fall from the sides of your eyes after feeling so stuffed you might break. 

But within a few minutes, you’re meeting him halfway, swaying your hips slightly to get him to hit that spot. You can’t stop mewling and telling him how good it feels. Your head falls back, your mouth falls open. He controls your body with every movement he makes, fulfilling every filthy desire you’ve had for him these last few days. How could you ever hope to be satisfied by anyone else? You want to praise him, you need to praise him. And so you do, chanting his name over and over in between faint and breathy yes’.

“See? You take me so well.” He watches your boobs move up and down with each thrust and even in this dull van, you are vibrant. Your beauty is that of angels that only grace this earth for minutes at a time before returning to heaven. He’s never seen anything like it.

He loves everything about you, from the curve of your top lip to your warm thighs, he can’t get enough. 

“My pretty girl..” he runs his hand down the center of your chest as one hand holds your waist. His hand goes all the way down, just to hover over your clit.

You look down and moan, but quickly swallow it as it’d be embarrassingly loud.

He only laughs while rubbing circles onto your clit. “Cum for me, baby..I can feel you holding it in. Remember, no one can hear you out here.”

He moves in and out more easily as your slick coats him. He leans forward, biting a nipple while his fingertips massage your clit. “Come on..give it to me, sweetheart, I missed you.”

And so you do. You shake and hold his arms for stability, crying out his name amongst swear words only nature can hear. “Good girl…” he teasingly flicks his tongue against your nipple while staying inside you.

Your hand caresses his scalp as you start to come down. You breathe heavily, quickly building sweat on your body.

He leans back and pulls out slowly, staring down at your entrance that leaks all over the floor of the van.

“Give me another one sweetheart, you’re so pretty like this.”

You shake your head. “I’m sensitive..I just need-.” But it’s too late, he’s already slid his slender fingers back into you, brushing against your walls so he can coat them with his own slick. “Wait!”

Your fingernails find his back and scratch into him again as he moves faster. “S-slow…please.”

“You said you’d follow my orders..” he pulls out completely, then pushes his fingers into you. He lays on his side while you still lay on your back, trying to regain your composure.

He watches as your eyes and legs close tightly.

“Let me see my pretty girl..” He swats your legs apart then rubs your clit mercilessly with his other hand. 

“Hnn..not yet, please..” you gasp as you feel the pressure of his fingertips.

“That’s it, right?” He says as he finds your sweet spot. He kisses your lips, swallowing your whimpers. You start to melt.

You can’t take it anymore, you yell his name out into the night and grab his wrist as you climax again. He chuckles, then removes your hand so he can keep moving. A puddle builds under you as your entire body loses all sense of control. “Good girl..look at the mess you’re making.”

You pant and your mouth falls open.

He places his fingers into it. “Taste yourself.” 

You lick around his fingers but his other hand still circles around your clit at a fast pace. Your eyes widen. “Don’t look so shocked.” He gives a sly smile. 

You squirm in his arms, picking your body up from the floor, but his toned body won’t let you escape. 

“It’s what you want..what you need.” He turns you on your side and hugs you tightly from behind. You reach out for the back of the driver seat to try to pull yourself away from him, but your fingertips just brush the black leather.

Jaehyun chuckles.

“Where are you going? You have to give me more..” he holds you tightly against him, entering you once more. 

“No more, please!” you push against his hips, but there’s no use. He continues to hold onto you and make you mush.

He moves repeatedly as you reach out for anything to grab, but only finding the cold metal of the van.

“Jaehyun!” Your head falls back. You shut your eyes tightly, feeling that ache in the pit of your stomach grow stronger. You have no choice but to accept that he won’t let you go. He stimulates you so well, you wonder how you can cry out for release, but desire more at the same time.

“Imagine someone IS out there..imagine they’re watching us and touching themselves right now..you’d like that, wouldn’t you?” he whispers into your ear.

Unfortunately, your pussy betrays you by clenching at the possibility.

He chuckles lowly and it makes goosebumps raise. “That’s my girl..you like people watching you take my seed…it’s gonna be so deep inside, and you’re gonna show them how well you hold it in for me like a good girl, right?”

All you can do is whimper. 

He chuckles when seeing how mesmerized you are by him. Your mouth falls open but nothing comes out.

“What if I keep you here? Breed you over and over?” He places his hand on your stomach again. “You’d be even prettier with a swollen belly and big, full tits. What do you say?“

You moan loudly and tremble.

Everything he says pushes you closer, you can’t think straight, you want to feel him everywhere. He’s all you can think about. 

“Sweetheart? I need an answer.” He nips the back of your neck.

“Yes..yes!”

You quiver around him. His steamy breath hits the back of your ear while he bends over you.

“Yes that’s it, this pretty pussy wants more and more..it’s never satisfied.” His low voice ruins you.

You clench uncontrollably and cum again, this time you lose your breath and nearly pass out. You’re so weak, all you can focus on is steadying your body.

He turns you over onto your stomach, grabbing your ass before staring at your dripping and swollen entrance.

He slides his dick in between the slit to tease both himself and you, watching as you flinch from the sensation. “You’re so wet today, maybe I’ll fuck you in public more often.”

His hands grip your waist once more, pulling you back onto his cock. 

He pushes into you slowly this time. His arms wrap tightly around your chest as if he is afraid you’ll slip away at any moment. His fingers pinch your nipples as he groans.

“You smell so good..” his face rests on the back of your neck, he kisses it and breathes heavily. 

You moan as he moves slowly against your aching walls.

“Are you ready to take it all?”

You nod and whimper. “Yes.” There’s no point in telling him you’re still reeling from your last climax and are too sensitive for the next one. He needs you now and he won’t stop for anything.

“Say it.”

“I..l” you close your eyes tightly.

“Come on sweetheart, look at me.” He places a hand to your chin to turn your head towards his. You look over your shoulder and into the eyes of the dark haired man bringing you to the edge with deliciously long strokes. He’s beautiful, a work of art even.

With your eyes locked you lick your lips. “Make me yours…I need you..”

Jaehyun’s movement stutters. He holds himself back from cumming just from your words and glossy eyes alone. He can’t believe this is real, he can’t believe he isn’t dreaming of making love to you right now and is actually doing it.

He kisses you and groans into your mouth, while your fingers still intertwine with his hair. His grip on your hip tightens and he moves faster.

“I need you too, my love..so badly.. keep me in”

“Yes..yes!” You arch your back again. You can’t believe yourself right now. Thirty minutes ago you wanted to kill this man, and yet, here you are allowing him to fuck your brains out and make you so stupid you can only think about being full enough to bear children for him.

His fingers move to your clit again and you see stars, your body tenses and you can’t stop clenching around him. 

You feel his abs flex on your back. “You can handle it right? Please..please tell me you can.” He speaks right over your round lips, and his voice is higher now. You gasp at the sound of his suddenly desperate and breathy pleas.

“God yes! I can! I’m your good girl..” you cry out. He feels so good, you can’t take it. You know you sound pathetic, but it doesn’t matter. The idea of being fucked until you’re leaking for days is so hot to you, it’s nothing but embarrassing.

“Tell me..you love me..tell me…please.” His voice cracks slightly in between his groans.

You look into his glossy eyes, searching them for a light that will tell you how he truly feels. You hesitate to tell him the truth. Not for fear that it will break his heart, but that it will break yours.

You love him, however, it’s never enough to make him stay.

“I love you..”

“Again..” he pants.

“I love..you.” 

“Again..”

“I love you, Jaehyun.” You whimper.

“Again, sweetheart..” he moves faster, feeling dizzy with how tightly you hold him.

“Jaehyun..please..I love you..Jaehyun.”

His fingertips dig into your skin. “One more.” He could listen to you chant his name in between “I love you’s” all day and night.

“I love you so much..I need you.” You let out as your body grows weaker.

“Yes, that’s it..I’m here for you, my love..take it.” He releases deep inside you, moving slowly to ensure you have every drop. He holds you fast against him until he’s sure your skin will be sore for a few days.

You moan loudly, convulsing around him before your body collapses.

“Fuck...” he lets out breathlessly when he pulls out. He lays down beside you and hugs you from behind for a few minutes.

“I’m sorry..”

You brace yourself, you can’t believe he’s doing this again. “..for what?”

“For ruining your beautiful set..I’ll get you another one.” 

You breathe a sigh of relief and smile.

You both get up and try to get dressed with what’s left.

Jaehyun takes his shirt up and drapes it over you. You tie the remnants of your dress around your hips to turn it into a skirt. You then get into the passenger seat as he gets into the driver seat, and head home.

When you’re halfway there, you notice Jaehyun doesn’t head in the direction of your place. “Wait..where-“

“I’m taking you home.” He drives with one hand on the steering wheel. 

“Home?” You smile to yourself, hoping he doesn’t look over to see how excited you are.

Once at his ridiculously large apartment, he runs a bath for you and cleans you thoroughly. You relax in the tub after he places epsom beads into the hot water to soothe your aching body. You close your eyes and feel him gently pour water over your back. It’s quiet. You’re too hoarse to speak, meanwhile Jaehyun is too nervous to say the first word. 

Jaehyun thinks about how much he loves you as never in his life has he pleaded for anything and especially not during sex. He doesn’t know how you do it, but you’ve got a hold on him unlike anything else. After several minutes, he speaks up.

He sits on the edge of the tub. “If you can give me another chance, I promise not to mess it up. I need you.”

You look into his eyes. “..you scare me.”

He stops moving. “I’m sorry.”

“You change your mind and act differently every day, and with no regard for other people. You have to let me know what you want.”

He leans down and kisses you deeply. When he pulls away he kisses your forehead. “Does that answer it?”

You smile softly and nod. 

He then lays you in his bed and after he showers, you fall asleep as he rubs your back and looks onto your soft face.

The truth is, you scare him too. These feelings are all too new to him. He used to live without care for anyone, even himself. Risking his life daily, for he did not care what would happen to him. But now..now he has someone to care for..someone to live for. You are someone he wants to be better for and the power you hold over him for this reason is scary. He felt this longing and care for you even before you let him touch you. Just being your friend was something he was grateful for, but now that you returned his feelings, he truly felt the magnitude of his desire for you.

The next morning, you’re happy to see you’re still in Jaehyun’s arms.

He’s happy to feel you next to him in reality, he doesn’t have to dream about it for once.

[The Next Night]

Johnny loosens his tie as he watches his neighbor pull into his driveway. He sits in his car before heading into his house, sighing while looking out into the night sky. One day, just one day, he’d like to be able to leave work on time. Overtime is his least favorite thing in the world—just in front of gang leaders of course. They make his job incredibly difficult. As the lead detective in his unit, he always has to pick up where the officers slack off at. To make matters worse, he went to his favorite spot for lunch, but the owner wasn’t there for once. He just hopes she’s okay. Maybe she’s getting some well deserved rest finally, he thinks to himself. Although, he finds it odd that you did promise to let him try out a new recipe for an Italian inspired bread. You were so excited when you spoke to him about it two days ago, and yet, you didn’t show.

“And the final touch is oregano! I’m so excited about it, you have to try it on Thursday for me! I trust your opinion.” You said with a wide smile as you sat with him. 

“Cute.” He thought to himself as he watched your eyes crinkle.

Suddenly, something catches Johnny’s eye. His neighbor’s front driver window is broken or rather-crumbling apart as he drives in.

He leaves his car and walks over to him.

“What happened?” Johnny’s brows furrow.

His neighbor jumps, startled by the deep voice just behind (and above) his head.

“Oh! UHhh hmmm..well..I work at a bank you know..sometimes people uhhh think I take money home with me haha!” The banker laughs loudly.

Johnny stands there with a stern expression. He doesn’t find it funny.

The banker then clears his throat. “Yeah umm someone broke into it..”

“Did you see them?”

“..kinda.” He shrugs

“Oh that’s terrible..come by tomorrow to submit an official re-“

“No!” The banker raises his voice suddenly, shocking Johnny into stillness.

“I mean..it’s all good, it’s not necessary. I was out on unofficial business anyway!”

Johnny continues. “Are you sure?”

“Yup! I have insurance too so it’ll be fixed within 24 hours! You have a good night!” He waves and starts to walk away.

Johnny watches and wonders why he’d be so nonchalant about the entire thing.

“Quick question..” he calls out and the banker turns hesitantly.

“What did they look like? I’d like to at least know that in case they continue to rob others in the city.”

“Of course! Although..I can’t describe him well..”

“It was a man?”

“Yes..that much I know.. a relatively tall man..he wore all black..a thick black turtleneck and black mask so I couldn’t see anything..”

“What did he use to break into your car?”

The banker chuckles. “You’re not gonna believe this but..he used his fist.”

Johnny’s eyes grow. What kinda maniac breaks through glass like that?

“Anyway! Goodnight!” The banker runs off into his house.

[Two Days Later]

You head back into work like normal, returning after receiving calls from a numerous amount of people asking where you were. It’s unlike you to be missing from your bakery for so long.

Truth is, you and Jaehyun spent A LOT of time together. Each time you tried to recover from your..sessions..Jaehyun would start all over again. It’s clear to see he missed you dearly. Luckily, you knew he didn’t just miss your body. He missed laughing with you too. You watched movies together and he even cooked for you. You couldn’t be happier to be in an official relationship with him.

“I’ll see you later.” You kiss his cheek and pull away. The two of you were leaning against his car, unconcerned about whoever saw you flirting with each other for 15 minutes.

Johnny watches from inside the bakery, sitting at the counter and sipping his coffee.

He looks at Jaehyun who wears a simple black T-shirt and jeans. The tall man looked good, but not as good as he’d look without all those ridiculous drawings in his body. He chuckles, is that jealousy he feels? He could end all of this by just arresting Jaehyun. You’d be safe, he’d be put behind bars finally.. Johnny knows what Jaehyun does, however he  doesn’t have enough evidence to put him away for a long time. Jaehyun kept things clean.

What are you doing with him? With a dangerous man that has tattoos covering his neck and arms?

“..covering his neck..” Johnny looks at the counter as he thinks to himself

a thick black turtleneck…

He remembers the banker's description. Who wears a thick black turtleneck in June? Normally, robbers wore a hoodie or thin sweatshirt

His eyes float back up to Jaehyun.

Jaehyun pulls you back for one final kiss and that’s when Johnny sees it.

A bruised right hand with little cuts along his knuckles.

Johnny’s eyes widen, but he quickly becomes calm when you walk in with a wide smile. “Hi! How are you?” You say with a grin.

You’re glowing, and Johnny feels that jealousy tinge in his chest again.

He takes a moment to respond. You put your bags down in the back then come back out while putting your apron on.

“Johnny? Everything okay?”

“Oh! Yes..yes of course…I see you took some time off.”

You smile brightly. “Yes! I needed a little break. I’m glad Mark was able to keep the place in one piece.” You laugh as you look around the somewhat clean bakery.

“Where did you go?”

“Oh..I was here..I mean, in the city..I just spent some time with my..boyfriend.” You smile even harder and giggle to yourself.

He forces a smile. “That’s nice to hear, y/n. I’m glad you’re back.”

“Thanks, Johnny!” You start to load the display with freshly baked cookies and cupcakes as Johnny gets back to drinking his coffee.

If you knew the kind of person Jaehyun was..why would you decide to date him? Jaehyun had to have been hiding his identity from you, Johnny thinks to himself.

And robbing a banker? That’s a low, petty crime for Jaehyun. Why would he do something like that himself? Surely, he’d have one of his minions do it? There were many questions on Johnny’s mind as he sipped quietly. He knows he has to find the answers quickly so he can free you from the deadly man that is Jaehyun.

To Be Continued....

[hannie-dul-set]

[error: extraneous variable]. see, the goal for this mission was very, very, very simple.

“you’re here. you’re here early.”

go undercover, move next to the residence of jung jaehyun, yunoh corp’s COO, pretend to be an unassuming and well-meaning neighbor for the next three months, and try to dig up any information you can get from anent the ongoing tax fraud investigation the state is probing into the corporation, by all means at your disposal. it was so very simple.

but despite that simplicity, you still haven’t managed to get that far.

“come on in,” jung jaehyun hums, ushering you into his penthouse unit with a smile. a smile. a very tender smile that nearly causes your own to twitch— twitch because what? why is he acting so weirdly today? “ah, i haven’t set out all the dishes yet. do you mind waiting?”

“sure, please take your time.”

this isn’t the first time you’ve set foot in his place— the beacon of all data, all information that you could possibly need for this investigation. hell, he’s even let you in his office. multiple times. twelve times. and ten out of twelve, he’d been distracted by your mouth on his, yet in spite of all that, you failed to get anything useful. 

he smiles at you again when you settle on his dining table seat, dimples popping, and you start to feel uneasy. it’s either jung jaehyun and his father’s company is actually clean, corruption free— 

“i’m sure you already know why i asked you to come over today.”

—or maybe he’s just a lot sharper than you thought.

there’s a steak dinner before you, a plate of carbonara on the side. your glasses are filled with thick, red wine. yet the only thing you think you could stomach right now is swallowing down the nervous lump in your throat because shit— is he on to you? has he finally caught on? “what...what do you mean?” you ask with a feigned laugh. god damn. maybe this is it for you.

“don’t— don’t act ignorant,” jaehyun replies. there’s a certain timbre in his voice, something along the lines of a quiver and a choke of bashfulness. your eyes narrow. you notice the aversion in his stare, the shake in his knuckles when he sets his fork down. oh my god. he can’t. he can’t be serious. “we’ve been seeing each other a lot these past few months. and…i think it’s about time that we…you know…”

this man is known in the entire industry to be very secretive, very mysterious. aloof. private. no one knows anything about him other than the rising numbers associated with him—

“start...start dating seriously…”

—yet here he is right now, pouring his entire fucking heart out,and blushing like a school girl while he’s at it. he’s fiddling his fingers. he’s blushing. you’re beyond shocked and alarmed. sure, you’d fooled around with him for a bit these past few months, but during that time, he’d always maintained that stoic air and serious persona. 

heck, you spent a good three weeks brute-forcing yourself into his daily routine. his text replies are never more than ten words. he’d call to come over during his lunch breaks and kick you out before one in the afternoon. 

“w—well…?” 

jung jaehyun almost sounds pathetic when he tries to prompt you for a response— any response, else you fear he’d break into a nervous fit. you’re speechless. this came unexpected. this came like a whiplash. you thought you and your team prepared for every possible situation that could arise, but this–-

“only—only if you want to, of course!” 

nothing could have prepared you for this. not a single thing.

[bakuromiii]

¡MASTERLIST!

WORD COUNT - 10.146

GENRE - angst haha | fluff | established relationship!au | CEO!au | slowburn?

CHARACTERS/PAIRING - CEO!jaehyun x orphanage caregiver!fem!reader | nct/wayv

INTRODUCTION - getting into a relationship when you were at the lowest point of your life dragged you down to the bottom. but it dragged the ones you loved as well.

WARNINGS - adoption/being an orphan | profanity (like a lot) | insecurities (major imposter syndrome) | being poor/poverty | panic attacks/anxiety/depression | alcohol consumption | (prescribed) pill intake | lots of dialogue | pet names 

TAGLIST - @xxvaelinxx @bbhmystar @actuallynarii @gfksz @jenosbliss

A/N - yikes this one’s a deep one :( the song is track five on the album and track three on the playlist. have fun breaking your hearts :’) (also hi ik it’s been literally centuries but it’s finally here pls don’t kill me (for the rushed end.))

DISCLAIMER - read as you please!! i don’t want to trigger anyone and please lmk if i missed any warnings! i don’t want to be insensitive to anyone's feelings. thank you <3 p.s. this is not proofread and im so sorry for the immense pause.

It wasn’t too far into your relationship when you broke down in front of Jaehyun. You didn’t know why but opening up to him just became natural.

To be fair, you were also a little ways past tipsy. 

In fact, you were a bit deep into the soju bottle you had bought while sitting outside of the convenient store when you first met Jeong Jaehyun, himself. Of course, you didn’t know he was the CEO of Jeong Peach Corporation at the time. 

Jeong Peach Corporation. A fragrance and personal hygiene corporation company whose audience consists of he’s, she’s, and they’s. The brand as a whole has this certain aesthetic that is appealing to those people. But Mr. Jeong Jaehyun himself also had a certain aesthetic that definitely matched the brand name he built from the ground up. His striking looks and simply the way he carries himself has men and women falling on their knees for him. But it was a little too late for them to capture his heart the way you did.

“Hey you! I can see you looking over here. How ‘bout’chu come over here and I’ll show you a piece of my mind,” you slurred and held up your fist. 

He was almost taken aback. Not because he was Jeong Jaehyun and you had the audacity to speak to him like that (again he carries himself in such a humble way that that would never be the option), but he was simply minding his business, walking to his car until he heard the sound of your drunk voice. He was definitely not expecting a drunk voice while he was ready to go home right around midnight. 

He chuckled to himself, too amused at the mere thought of you. But it was midnight and this was the darkest the sky was going to get. It was dangerous for you— for anyone— to be out this late, by themselves, downing a bottle of soju. Well, two and a half bottles of the infamous alcoholic drink. 

“Who are you? And why are you out here so late? Drunk?” He laughed, tucking his phone into his pocket, slyly grabbing a chair and sitting by you. 

“Suffering. It’s tough out here,” you took another shot.

“Hello, suffering. Why are you out drinking soju so late?” He teased. It was easy to get along with you it seemed, the alcohol brought out the extrovert in you.

“Hey! My name is Y/n. Not suffering…. I’m just saying I’m suffering because,” you paused. And he subtly leaned closer to you, wanting to hear the reason why you’re here by yourself, downing the whole damn bottle.

“…. Just because, okay. Now can you please go so I can drown my own sorrows by myself? I don’t need another pity party,” you sobered up for a moment, then went back to pour yourself another shot. 

But before you could take the shot, Jaehyun grabbed it from your loopy hands and took the shot instead.

“Hey! You don’t just take someone else's alcohol! That was the last shot too! Now I have to go buy another bottle!” You pushed yourself up from your seat only to be met with the hard concrete ground. 

“You shouldn’t be out here this late, miss Y/n,” he said, his voice laid with concern. 

“Who are you to tell me that? I don’t even know who you are,” you pouted, still sitting on the ground. He sighed to himself, showcasing his deep dimples, and got up from his chair to help you up. He was going to try and take you home.

“Hey! What the hell are you doing?!” He wrapped his arm around your waist to keep you up.

“Stranger danger! Stranger danger! This man is trying to kidnap me!” You yelled out. Of course, no one would really hear you. Besides Bong Cha— who was a goodie-two-shoes for Jeong Jaehyun and Jeong Jaehyun only— who walked out of the company right after her boss had. She saw the whole thing go down.

“Stop it! I’m trying to help you!” He struggled, since you were kicking and flailing your arms around in order to prevent him from taking you. 

“Help me, my ass. What do you want from me? Taking advantage of a poor, drunk, girl just trying to get in my pants? Get off me fucking psycho. My car is the other way,” you kicked some more. And he gave up, placing you on the ground once more.

“Please, Y/n, you have to work with me here. I just don’t want you staying out late. Who knows? You could actually get kidnapped if I don’t help you.”

“How can I trust you? I don’t even know your name. You may be handsome but it’s always the hot ones that are fucked up. More fucked up than me!” You exclaimed.

He sighed and rubbed his forehead. Maybe he should have just left you at the seven-eleven. But Jaehyun just sat on the ground next to you, a good distance away and observed your ridiculous, drunk, figure. 

“I’m Jeong Jaehyun,” he started, “now can you please cooperate with me? I’m trying to help you, here.”

You looked up and squinted your puffy eyes at him. “In your damn dreams, you’re Jeong Jaehyun. Like I’d believe that. I may be drunk but I’m not fucken delusional.” Oh, but you were delusional. 

You slowly raised from your seat on the ground and walked your way back to your car, which wasn’t actually where you parked it. The man followed you— sorta like a creep— just to make sure you were safe. But on the way to your car (which was not the right way at all), you bumped into Kim Bong Cha herself. 

She hadn’t seen her boss behind you because it was a little too dark but she lashed out at you anyway, “Hey! Watch where you’re going dumb bitch.” You were about to pounce on her until he caught you before you had the chance. 

“Let me go! Let me at her!” 

The girl was shocked to still see her boss shielding her from you. And she felt embarrassed to let him hear the rude words come out of her mouth. Karma’s a bitch.

“I’m sorry, Bong Cha. Please, go home. And don’t discuss this to anyone. I’m just trying to help her,” he explained to his secretary. Ah, so she was his secretary. That makes a lot of fucking sense.

Quietly, she speed-walked to her car leaving the two of you alone again. 

“Why didn’t you let me at her? She was being a rude asshole.”

“Y/n. She’s my secretary. And she’s always been like that. But don’t worry about her, okay. Please just let me help you,” he begged. It was too late for him to just leave you on the road. 

You sighed, the dizziness was now getting to you. 

“Fine. I need to get to my car, though,” you pushed him off of you.

“I don’t think you’re capable of driving right now,” he retorted.

“Then what the hell am I supposed to do?” 

And that was how you ended up sitting in the passenger seat of Jaehyun’s luxury car (the one he drove that day was his Aston Martin DB11.) 

That was how you first met Jeong Jaehyun.

So much for first impressions. 

—

When you woke up the next morning (with a massive headache), you found the CEO asleep on your couch. All in your shitty apartment. And when last night's events finally hit, you felt like the biggest asshole on planet Earth. 

Jeong Jaehyun was sleeping on your couch. In your shitty apartment that could definitely not even compare to his lavish lifestyle. You felt embarrassed all over again. God, what the fuck were you thinking?

You tried to clean up a bit before you woke him up but nothing would fix the slightly stained walls and the old furniture he was definitely a foe to. 

After you cleaned up the place, he still seemed to be fast asleep, so you decided to cook up some type of breakfast for him. The rusty refrigerator only consisted of greens (that were about to go bad), a carton of eggs, and a gallon of water. Sunny side eggs, it is. 

This was for sure nothing he was used to. He was a CEO after all. The CEO of one of the most popular global brands, might you add. Which made the whole situation so much more humiliating.

Whilst you were cooking, you looked over your shoulder because of the squeaking of the couch Jaehyun fell asleep on. You wanted to fall off the face of the Earth. 

Quickly you set the eggs into a plate and placed them next to his water you had already set on the table in front of him. He had only been awake for five seconds and he was met with the hospitality of you. 

“Mr. Jeong Jaehyun,” you started, “or— no, yeah. Mr. Jeong Jaehyun, sir, I’m so incredibly sorry for the inconvenience I left last night. You did not have to take me home. In fact you didn’t have to stay the night, which was kinda stupid on your part, not that I would ever call you stupid, even though I just did but-” he cut you off. You definitely rambled a bit too much. 

“It’s okay, Y/n,” he slightly laughed, picking up the chopsticks from the plate and eating the egg. 

You sat in front of the table, too defeated to say anything. Too defeated to even look at him— even in the few minutes he had been awake, he was more prestigious than you’ll ever be. You didn’t care about who he was. You really did, of course, but after the whole mess, you didn’t even want to be in his presence anymore. 

“Why are you so quiet, angel?” The pet name made you feel even worse. Why was he being so nice?

You gulped and looked at him. 

“I’m just- I’m so sorry about last night. I was just-”

“Suffering?” He cut you off once more.

The fact that he answered you and finished your sentence made you want to crawl up in a ball and never come out. Last night definitely placed number one in your list of horrible nights. 

“Uhm… yeah, that. But-”

“Why don’t you eat, love?” This was the third time he cut you off and the second time he referred to you as an endearing person. He acted as if he knew you for his entire life. 

“I’m uh- it- it’s okay. I’m not really that hungry so,” you trailed off, looking down at your hands while you played with your fingers. Just then, he shoved his chopsticks in your face. A piece of egg sat on it. He motioned for you to eat. 

You quickly turned your head and shook it, pushing his hand back, “No!” You cleared your throat, “it’s really alright, Mr. Jeong.” You really don’t know why you called him that but it just came out. It was probably the nervousness.

��Jaehyun.”

“Jaehyun… It’s really okay. I mean this is also the least I could do- uhm- especially after last night. Also, my house is a bit of a mess, I'm sorry about that.”

Jaehyun noticed the neighborhood and apartment complex you lived in. Of course, Jaehyun was a nice person so he wasn’t going to comment on it but it was obvious he noticed the living situation you were in. But none of it mattered to him. He just wanted to make sure you got home safely. 

“Don’t apologize about that, Y/n. Now eat.”

“I have more eggs in the fridge. I can make my own, don’t worry about it,” you felt your face flush with heat. He caved in and shoved the piece of egg into his mouth, still worried about you.

It was awkward for a long time until he finished his food. You took his plate and cup and put it in the sink. 

“I’m sorry. Do you want to wash up? Or maybe-” he laughed.

He had a habit of cutting you off, and you’ve only met this man all of eight hours. Most of those hours you were out cold.

“Stop apologizing, love,” he smiled at you, dimples on full display.

“I’m sorry-” you cut yourself off this time. He laughed again. You were cute. 

“I actually need to go to the bathroom. Could you show me where that is?” He asked. You nodded and pointed him down the hall to the left. He quickly thanked you and made his way.

Right when the bathroom door closed, you ran into your bedroom and plopped, face first, into the sheets. How degrading that was. 

When Jaehyun was done using the bathroom he got out and called your name which made you scurry out of your room to meet him from behind. You forcefully smiled and waited for what he was going to say.

“Your car is still at the convenience store.” Your fake smile dropped as you scrunched your nose, remembering how he drove you home. 

“It’s alright. I’ll walk there later. It’s no problem.”

“But-” this time you were the one to cut him off.

“You’ve already done so much for me. I owe you my life,” you joked.

He playfully scoffed and walked toward you, now directly in front of you,“Just let me drop you off. It’s a far walk.” 

“I can Uber or take the bus. Really, everything is okay. I don’t need you to help me anymore. You helped me more than I needed last night and I owe you everything I have.” You were so stubborn. He wouldn’t give up, though.

And there you sat in the same passenger seat as last night. 

“I’m going to wash up at my house first. Is that alright?” He looked over to you while at a red light. You had been looking out the window before he said that.

“Of course. Take all the time you need. I’m in no rush.”

—

You underestimated the home Jaehyun lived in. It was pure luxury. Fenced-in house with a security system (that, alone, probably costs more than your apartment), green upkept grass, and a beautiful white exterior and interior that screamed majestic, mature, and regal. It made your home feel like a shit-show. It made you feel completely horrible about yourself. 

“Please, come inside,” he opened the passenger side door for you.

Shakily, you unbuckle the seatbelt and exited his car. And he just sweetly smiled at you the entire time. It made you want to cry.

He led you to the front door with his hand hovering the small of your back. You could feel the heat of his hand through your shirt. You took off your shoes and followed him inside.

It was very bright and very aesthetically decorated. With plants (which you weren’t sure were fake or not), paintings that you had never seen before, and knick knacks that seemed too expensive for you to even touch. But he led you past everything in his house and went straight into his bedroom. He had a whole couch and side chairs as well as a fireplace. It was just as grand as the rest of his home. 

“Uhm, you can sit on the bed if you’d like. Or the couch, I don’t know. But I'll be done shortly. Please, make yourself comfortable,” he held your arm, informing you. But you were too stunned to speak, so you nodded your head instead. 

You sat on the couch, it was a little weird for you to sit on his bed when you barely knew anything about him (and he barely knew anything about you). Plus, you were too busy gawking at his house. And it made you feel self conscious again. It made you feel small; like you didn’t belong. Which you didn’t. So you don’t know why Jaehyun seemed so comfortable with you. 

He came out of his bathroom— that was attached to his bedroom— buttoning up his shirt with damp hair. He took as quick of a shower as he could, to not keep you waiting. And through the reflection of the mirror, he could see you with your head facing down again, probably playing with your hands. 

“Y/n, love,” he called out. You whipped your head around to his voice, not expecting that to escape his lips.

“Can you please help me button this?” You don’t understand why he called out to you as if you were his lover. Or at least someone he was comfortable with. Couldn’t he see that you were a bit lost? 

You sighed to yourself and wiped your palms against your pants, hesitantly walking up to him. 

Carefully, you buttoned up the rest of his shirt and looked up at him. He was already staring at you with all the love and adoration in his eyes. Of course, you didn’t realize this at the time. Jaehyun himself didn’t even realize it.

He then handed you his tie, “I hope you can tie a tie?”

You’ve tied many ties in your time of working at the orphanage. 

—

Warm Hearts Orphanage held a prolonged special place in your heart. You’d been going to the orphanage as far back as you could remember. The orphanage held children from infants to teens. And everyone there was like family. Even though your little family didn’t have much, it always warmed your hearts to give back to children who were less fortunate than you were. And though you grew up poverty stricken, these children suffered more than you did and all you wanted was to help them. 

You’ve seen children come and go, and the thoughts that always come to you is that they lived a happy life. Everyone in the orphanage deserved it. Even the sourest of apples, because all they wanted was to be loved by a family.

That being said, the orphanage always planned surprise parties for those children who had been adopted. It was a nice tradition, and you’ve helped many children get ready to graduate from Warm Hearts into a family that will love them.

—

“I can.”

As you were doing up his tie he slowly raised a hand to pat down your hair. The action made you pause your movements. Then, you realized everything that was going on was completely wrong and inappropriate, so you quickly finished doing his tie and took a step back. Your heart fell to your ass.

“What’s wrong, lovely?” You still felt like you were going to cry. 

“I- Nothing. Don’t worry about me,” you fakely smiled again. But, again, it was as if he knew you your entire life because he wiped the pad of his thumb against your lips, making you genuinely frown.

“How can I not worry when you seem squeamish? And these fake smiles plastered on your face. What’s wrong?” He stopped swiping your bottom lip and cupped your face with the entirety of his right hand; thumb rubbing your cheek instead.

You still forced a smile and wrapped your hand around his wrist, bringing his hand away from your face. You felt undeserving of everything he was doing to you. And you wanted to hide your emotions as much as you could.

“I’m okay. You can stop worrying about me. I’m fully capable of taking care of myself,” you released your hold on his wrist and held yours, crossed in front of your body. 

This time, with his left hand, he smoothed down your hair and let his hand rest on your face.

“Okay, pretty. If you say so. Now, let’s go get your car, yeah?” You bit your lip and nodded and he led you out of his house with his hands on the small of your back, just like he did when he was bringing you inside.

The seven-eleven you were drinking at just so happened to be located right next to Jeong Peach Corporation. Your car was still parked in the parking lot. And it was still nothing to ever compare to the CEO who was sitting beside you.

You both got out of the car, and he was standing in front of you. 

“Thank you and I apologize for last night. But if it weren’t for you, I’d probably be passed out on the sidewalk,” you awkwardly laughed. 

“No worries, love. And thank you for your hospitality. I’m happy you’re doing alright,” he responded.

You pursed your lips and pivot your heels to the direction of your car.

“I hope to see you again, Y/n.” Yeah right.

You pivot your heels back to the direction of Jaehyun. The embarrassment of last night and this morning still lingered in your body. There was no way you would see him again. You were from two completely different worlds. And there was no way you were coming back to this seven-eleven.

“I hope so too,” you said bitterly before rushing to your car. 

“Y/n!” He said before you could finish shutting your door. You groaned to yourself, stepping back out of your car and facing him again. You wanted to save yourself from the self-bashing already.

“Would you like to… maybe… grab something to eat later?” But damn, he was too nice to turn down. You wanted to say yes so badly, but another part of you wanted to decline. You just didn’t belong in his world. 

He was born to an upper class family, you knew that. Everyone knew that. So what would happen if you said yes? You had nothing to offer.

But it didn’t hurt trying, right?

You took in a huge gulp, “…. I would like that.”

“I’m sorry, what?!” exclaimed Danbi while the two of you were washing dishes.

The kids had just eaten and they were now free to do whatever they pleased, whether that was draw, sleep, or take a walk during the good weather. 

“Keep it down!” You shushed her.

“I can't! THE Jeong Jaehyun of THE Jeong Peach Corporation asked you out on a date tonight?!” She squealed in happiness for you, making the bubbles fly everywhere. 

You told her everything that had just happened within the past twenty-four hours. And she was beyond stoked for you. This was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and she knew you deserved it the most. You’d been through hell and back and you’re about to go right back. She knew everything about your situation, you’d both been volunteering here for years so it was only natural to open up to one another.  

“No one said anything about a date…. Just a, uh, hangout. Yeah…. a hangout.”

“Y/n, he just met you and he’s head over heels for you already! I’m so excited for you!”

You were excited too. Way beyond excited.

—

Jaehyun said he would pick you up around nine p.m. You had just gotten back from grocery shopping and you now had a little over an hour to shower and get ready. You didn’t even know where he was taking you. 

But as you were applying your makeup and looking in your bathroom mirror, everything started shutting down on you. And you were surrounded with nothing but your own, suffocating, thoughts. You were a fraud. But Jaehyun was coming to pick you up soon, so now was not the time to think about it; or at least try not to. Fake it ‘till you make it.

When the knocking on your door signified Jaehyun's arrival, you quickly sprayed some perfume and opened up the door for him.

You were wearing a simple, spaghetti strap black dress with a slit on the side leg and a dark gray blazer with a matching bag. He looked the same as he did when you saw him this morning, except his blazer was now off of his body and he took off his tie which left him with his white button up (which he unbuttoned the first few to give him more of a casual look).

“Are you ready?”

☹ ☹ ☹

I told you I was down bad

You hate to see me like that

Two whole years had gone by and it was almost your third anniversary. Almost, as in, it was six months away. But so much can happen in a mere six months that seem to pass by so quickly. 

You were in your apartment, the same crappy apartment you lived in two years ago, crying in your sheets. Your damn thoughts were getting to the best of you again. 

And when you didn’t respond to Jaehyun’s phone calls, it was an understatement to say he was worried about you. So he drove to your apartment immediately. 

He frantically knocked on your door and almost broke it down until you came to open it, eyes still red from your tears and breath still uncontrollable. Your lover welcomed himself inside and shut the door, holding you so tight yet soft in his embrace in the doorway. He was trying to comfort you with his lips resting on your forehead and his hands carefully cradling your body.

“It’s alright, love. I’m here. Don’t cry. Please. I need you,” he repeated into your hair, rubbing your back and swaying you both side to side. But the action made you cry even more. You didn’t deserve the love he gave to you. Your head rested on his firm chest as you tried to calm down the pain.

“Angel, where are your meds? Are they in your room?” 

You nodded as best as you could as he carefully led you inside and into your bedroom. Jaehyun sat you down on your bed before grabbing a glass of water for you to take your pills. You hated relying on him so much. You hadn’t changed. But what you don’t know is that Jaehyun loved you even more than he did two years ago. He loved you because you weren’t afraid to show him such a vulnerable part of the human being you had become. Or so he thought.

You did what you had to do and he carefully pulled you into bed with him. Your head rested in the crook of his neck as he felt your hiccuping breath die down into slumber. He rubbed your back some more, hoping that it would lull you to sleep faster. 

You don’t know what you’d do if he wasn’t here. Jaehyun was your everything, as were you to him.

—

When you woke up the following morning, you were still in Jaehyun’s embrace. Slowly, you turned around to check the time and the clock read 5:43

a.m. That was why it was still dark outside. 

You turned back around to face Jaehyun and you sadly smiled at him. He worked so hard 24/7 and the purple bags under his eyes proved that. You just wished there was something you could do to help him, just like the various ways he had helped you. Jaehyun has always been there to help. From the day you two met, to this moment, Jaehyun was always your number one. 

You shifted around in his arms as he slightly groaned because of the sudden movement. 

“I’m sorry, love. Keep sleeping,” you whispered, kissing his closed eyes. He came to your house in his work clothes, though, so you were sure he was a bit uncomfortable. You walked to your wardrobe and found some folded up pajama pants he left over the other night as well as one of his gray hoodies he left ‘not on purpose.’ You gathered his clothes and walked to the bed to wake him up.

“Wake up. If you’re gonna keep sleeping, at least change, love. You’re probably all stuffy in your button up and dress pants,” you lightly shook him awake. He groaned some more before stretching his limbs and opening his eyes. You were the best thing he could ever wake up to.

Jaehyun playfully pulled the blanket over his head and managed to wrap his arms around your waist as you were sitting down beside him. You laughed at his antics and tried to free his grip on you. It failed; and you ended up wrapped under your sheets with him, his comfortable clothes still in your hands.

“What if I don’t want to change,” he challenged.

“You don’t have to,” you teased. “But it’s not going to be my fault when you complain about being uncomfortable.” 

His tight hold on you faltered for a moment before he fully released you and took off your blanket from his (and your) bodies. He released a puff and pouted his plump morning lips. The man sighed and got out of bed, taking the clothes you had in your hands and just stripping from his work clothes right then and there. 

“Aren’t you gonna change in the bathroom?” You asked, laying back down in bed. So much for getting up.

“Eyy, you know I don’t do that. I’m gonna come back into bed anyway,” he said before climbing in after you and pulling the grey sheet back onto him. As he slid into your bed, you wrapped your arms around his head as he rested himself to be held by you. Jaehyun loved being babied, especially in the early hours of the morning. It was one of the many charismatic features about him.

—

When you woke up the second time that morning, it was only nine o’clock. But Jaehyun seemed to be awake now, cooking breakfast that was sizzling from the kitchen.

Quietly, you sat on one of the stools and stared at him. He was the best thing that ever came into your life.

But why did he openly put himself in it?

You always wondered why Jaehyun stayed. It always turned into panic attacks and crying fits, but you couldn’t help it. He was a part of a completely different social status and you stood out like a sore thumb when you were next to him. It wasn’t like you were ashamed to be his girlfriend; you just thought he was ashamed to have you as his girlfriend.

He should.

There goes those thoughts again.

Unknowingly, you choked a sob which made him turn around. When he saw you, he smiled with pure adoration beaming in his eyes. God, why did he make this so hard?

He shut off the stove and walked toward you, forgetting about the breakfast he was making, it was almost done, anyway. Jaehyun wiped his hands with a towel and walked to you, cupping your face with his right hand, wiping the tear that seemed to fall from your eye.

“Why are you crying, love?” He still held the same, sweet, smile.

“…. I love you.”

He raised you from your seat and just hugged you, lips resting on the crown of your head, swaying you back and forth on the creaky floor.

“I love you more.”

“I’m sorry I’m like this,” you confessed against his chest.

But he immediately raised you from your position, to look at his, now serious, expression.

“Never apologize for something you can’t control. You say sorry all the time, peach. I love that you feel the need to say it, but you really don’t need to say it all the time. Especially in front of me. You know how much I love you, right? For being who you are?” He wiped the baby hairs away from your face. 

“You know how much I don’t care how messed up, or whatever you call it, you are, right?”

“…… Of course.”

“Then you should stop being such an amazing person. I don’t deserve you. But here I am,” he laughed, tugging you into his frame once more.

However, you still felt the need to give him the world. You still felt as though you owed him your life, he’d been your boyfriend for almost three years.

And yet you still thought that it was you who didn’t deserve him.

“Now stop crying. You know I don’t like it when you cry. Especially if it’s your damn thoughts that are eating at you.”

You love him so much.

☹ ☹ ☹

I don’t know how you look past

My stupid fucking setbacks

You said it before and you’ll say it again. You’ll say it a million more times; Jaehyun deserved more.

Sometimes, you’ll look in the crooked mirror placed in your bathroom and just think to yourself. Think about all the negatives rather than thinking about the positives. And although there are times you do think about the positives, they all end up with a wretched outcome. And then it’s negative thoughts all over again.

It’s the same routine and you’re growing sick of it. You’ve been sick of it ever since you could remember and you despise people who seem to have it easy. It just seemed as though there was no luck for you. The only luck the universe brought to you was Jaehyun. There are times, though, where you wished you never met him. He was a goddamn CEO and you were a low-class citizen. None of it just made sense.

But you loved him. It just hurts to deal with your true emotions and stow them away from your lover; because you never wanted him to watch what you were going through. Even the thought of it made you want to vomit.

Trauma just came natural to you, apparently. And you absolutely hated it. You just wished you were different, then maybe you wouldn’t feel so guilty about dating Jaehyun. Then he would truly be proud of who you are.

He was already proud of you, though. And he’s told you this a billion times. Your brain just makes you believe that he’s saying it out of pity. He’s only saying it because you’re his girlfriend. 

And the cycle continues.

—

You were spending the next couple of days at Jaehyun’s house. It was obvious he didn’t like your lifestyle and wished for you to live with him. You could never bring yourself to do it though; to always rely on him for everything that you do. You were fully aware of what you could and could not do, and you didn’t need him to help you.

Which led you to silently cry away your sorrows in his bathroom. You were taking a bath, in hopes to dial down the overwhelming emotions that engulfed you. Yet here you were, with a flushed face and puffy eyes— the aftermath of a breakdown. 

It seemed as though ever since you got into a relationship with Jaehyun, your anxiety only intensified. And that resulted in the thoughts that had been burdening your mind since the day you two met. 

Fortunately, he wasn’t home to face the pointless shenanigans that go through your head. So you had enough time to pull yourself together, take your meds, and try to meditate on the balcony that was attached to his bedroom. 

The summer nights were cool enough for you to relax your mind before Jaehyun made his way home. You were working at the orphanage the whole day and you managed to pull through the entire day without a single tear, which probably led to the bathroom-breakdown fiasco. 

The crickets had been chirping and the wind was starting to blow. That was when you heard the bedroom door open. And when Jaehyun saw the slight movement of the balcony curtains, he knew you were outside doing whatever you do best. 

Quietly, the man sighed to himself, placed his work on the side desk and undid his tie. He was finally home. He was finally with you. 

Jaehyun opened the sliding door larger than what it was and joined you in sitting on the floor with his legs crossed. At first he let out a long breath and looked out toward the yard which his bedroom was facing. Then, he got tired and shifted toward you. 

That happened all in thirty seconds.

Your eyes were still closed as you breathed in. Jaehyun lovingly smiled at you and kissed the side of your head.

“I missed you today, angel,” he broke the silence. 

You opened your eyes and shifted your body to face him.

“You say that every day,” you chuckled and played with his fingers. A habit of yours that Jaehyun absolutely adored.

“And it’s always true. I can't wait for the day I get to see you every time I come home.” You felt more guilty that he had the need to say that. And you knew he meant nothing harmful, he was just a caring person and didn’t want you living the life you had. You were better off living with him.

But you joked, “You will. For the next three days. And then I’m off home.”

He groaned and layed back on the cold floor. “Don’t remind me. I want to cherish the time we have now.”

You laughed once more. He was acting as if he didn’t come to see you practically every day. Sometimes, he’ll even leave his job just to come see you at the orphanage. 

“Eyy, quit saying that. I’m still here. You come by all the time. Sometimes twice a day. You’ll get sick of me soon, I can guarantee. I don’t know how you put up with me all these years.”

Although you were (partially) joking, Jaehyun sat right up from his prior position and looked at you with his pout and furrowed brows. 

“What do you mean, peach? I could and would never get sick of seeing you. Don’t say that.” You were shocked to see him react that way.

You slightly snickered at him and said, “I was joking, love. I’m sorry,” you leaned your head closer to his and placed a little kiss on his lips, to make him sort of forgive you for saying that. 

“You better be. I don’t know what I’d do without you, peach,” he kissed back. And pecked your lips repeatedly, several times. 

The actions made you laugh out loud and slightly push him away. Jaehyun loved being the reason why there was the brightest smile on your face. So he quietly smiled as your eyes crinkled because of him.

He suggested that you two wash up. However, you already told him you bathed before he came home. And like a child, he groaned and went into the bathroom himself. But he made you promise to wait for him tomorrow. You agreed, because he was your little baby. 

As he was in the shower, you cuddled your way into his bed sheets and blanket. The lights were now dimmed and all you were doing was waiting for him to get out of the shower. Hopefully he would be able to beat the slumber that easily pulled you in. 

The warmness of the blanket, though, soothed you to sleep and Jaehyun was unable to defeat the unfortunate slumber that casted over you. It was a shame since he wanted to talk to you; ask about your day and what you did. He’d grown used to the look of your puffy eyes, and he knew you’d been crying. He knew you were having a moment the minute he stepped onto the patio. Because the only time you would sit out there was if something was bothering you.

Being the amazing person he was, left you alone, and didn’t ask about what you clearly didn’t want to talk about. He believed that you would open up to him when you were ready. You’ve already opened up to him so much, but nothing would stop him from worrying about you. 

Once he got out of the shower and towel-dried his hair, he placed the wet towel in the basket and climbed into bed next to you, immediately clinging to your fatigued figure. God, he would give you the entire world. Jaehyun turned around and shut off the lamp on his side of the bed (yours was already turned off) and hugged you against him, his breath soon evening out to match yours. 

And fast asleep he was.

—

The following morning, Jaehyun was awakened with your fingers threaded in his hair and his face squished against your chest. He managed to stretch some parts of his limbs whilst still, practically, laying on top of you. 

“Good morning, angel,” he said in his morning voice, “I’m not going into work today.”

As a CEO, you’d expect him to take care of himself (with Jaehyun being his own boss and all) but you didn’t expect him to say he wasn’t going in. Not that you minded, you’d much rather spend the day with him but Jaehyun was a hard-working man, and he rarely took days off. 

“I’m not going in for the next three days either. It’s been a while since I took a day or two off.”

“Yeah, but you’re taking four days off, including today. Are you sure you want to do that?”

He was taken aback for a moment. Did you not want to spend time with him anymore?

“There’s nothing wrong with me taking four days off. You appreciate it, no?” He said in the littlest voice which instantly made you regret what you said.

“No, no, no. Oh, I’m sorry my love, I didn’t mean to make you upset. It’s just that you’re so busy with work and it’s just me so you don’t have to-” you rambled.

“And that’s where I’m gonna stop you. You know how much you mean to me, so of course I’m gonna take these days off to spend as much time with you as I can. The company's getting a little busier with a new launch around the corner but I’m sure they’ll be able to survive without me for a few days,” he retaliated.

You sighed, still feeling like an asshole for wording the sentence the way you did. God, could you do anything to make him happy? It felt as though everything you said and everything you did could never satisfy him. Of course, those were just your thoughts.

Jaehyun was happy that you cared about his job, but what he wanted you to realize the most is how much he wanted to be with you. Whatever it was, spending time with you is the best remedy he could ever ask for. 

Just why is he never sick of you and your words? You’re sure he would be with how rude you, unintentionally, were to him. 

☹ ☹ ☹

When you opened up the door

You let me in when you should have your guard up

Thinking back to the time you finally let Jaehyun crawl through your walls— when he’d let down his walls way before you— the constant feeling of regret and pain constantly filled you. Whether or not the glass was half-full or half-empty, it was always just half. There was never a certain hundred percent yet Jaehyun took his time in letting you trust him as Jeong Yoon Oh. 

Thinking back to the time you first met Jaehyun himself, he somehow couldn’t process the red-flag you were oh-so not afraid to show while you were inebriated. He thought you were cute, and the words you were spilling from your mouth, conscious or not, made him feel sort of protective over you. And he didn’t even know you.

It was about ten a.m. when the two of you got out of bed. Ever since the conversation earlier, the air has just been tense. At least for you. You’re sure Jaehyun probably hadn’t felt anything but your brain was constantly playing tricks on you, and this could be one of them.

Your lover is in the bathroom now, as you’re sitting on the bed staring into space with your thoughts locked into your brain. You should apologize. Of course, you want him to stay home with you, but he plays an important role in the economy and in his industry that you can’t help but feel bad for keeping him away from what he loves doing most.

Resting against the headboard, you turn your head toward the bathroom door that was being opened. He walks through and sits back in his spot next to you, although his body is fully facing yours.

“I’m sorry about earlier. I just… I don’t want to keep you here if you have a lot to prepare for your launch,” you sighed and rubbed your eyes.

He laughed, but the feeling of hurt lingered a bit in his eyes as he held the utmost respect to you. “You don’t have to apologize, my love. It’s completely okay. And if they need help, they have my number and it’ll all get fixed with a simple phone call, alright?” He used his right hand to cup your face, rubbing the pad of his thumb against the surface of your cheeks. 

You bit your lip in hesitation but you stopped when Jaehyun leaned down and kissed away the bad habit he always noticed you had. 

“Let’s make breakfast, yeah?” He whispered against your lips, giving you the biggest puppy eyes ever. You laughed and kissed him one more time before going into the bathroom to get ready for whatever the day was going to bring. 

—

Breakfast was absolutely lovely. As it always is whenever you’re with Jaehyun. But for some reason, this morning’s just hit so different.

Today, though, you planned on going to the orphanage just as a surprise visit. Truly, it was your home. Your second home (if you considered Jaehyun.) 

“Well, I was planning on getting goodie bags for the kids but… I don’t think I’m gonna. We can just spend the day there,” you were telling him all the things you wanted to do today and the things you wanted to do for the kids there but you were having trouble deciding what to actually do.

“Nah, we can go to the grocery and buy them goodies,” he abruptly said as if it was no problem. Realistically there was no problem. Except you. 

“But-”

“No buts. I haven’t seen them in a while, so just consider it a gift from me. Now, let’s finish our food and get some snacks for the kiddos,” he put his plate in the sink as you sighed in adoration (and maybe a little in guilt.)

Grocery shopping with Jaehyun was like grocery shopping with a child. And it was good, because he picked out snacks he thought the children would like, as well as treat bags to put them in. He was a child at heart although he portrayed a stoic and successful CEO.

The two of you sat in his car for an hour in the Warm Hearts Orphanage parking lot packing juices and snacks and candy into the bags before finally walking through the front door. 

One of the staff members had seen you and happily greeted the two of you as you walked into the main entrance to the room the kids spent the most. Upon your arrival, all of the children shouted in happiness, greeting you with hugs and questions of the bags that were placed in a cardboard box that Jaehyun was holding.

Giving them out and spending time with them truly warmed your heart as they played the whole day long with Jaehyun. 

He was so fond of children and your entire being melts with the sight of him playing with them and catching them up on his launch. 

Something about it was heartwarming yet bittersweet. 

You don’t know how long you could last anymore.

☹ ☹ ☹

What a painful back and forth, oh

Today was just not a good day. For you and for Jaehyun. He called you in the morning and said he was going to visit you at your apartment when he was done in the office. 

Only problem was, it was twelve in the morning when he walked through the door with the extra key you gave him. Your apartment was quiet, excluding the yelling from the thin walls of whichever neighbor. 

For the first time since he’s met you, this was the first time he’d actually noticed every little detail about your apartment. From the stained walls to the crack in your window. He felt like he wanted to cry. Jaehyun didn’t want you living like this anymore, that was the truth. And he knew you worked two jobs before committing to the orphanage. He also knew you were never able to pursue college. No amount of scholarships you were given could afford the ungodly university tuition.

And just as he was about to suck up the water forming in his eyes, you walked out of your room, fully awake. You stopped and called out his name. But the ringing in his ears only got louder. And soon he broke down into tears.

You were completely shocked. It was midnight and you didn’t think he would come over because it was so late. But now he’s here, and you don’t know how long he has been standing there, breaking down right in front of you.

“Hey, hey, hey. What’s wrong, angel?” you held him in your grasp as his tears kept coming down.

“Why are you crying? Please tell me, my love,” you pleaded, voice cracking. In the three years you’d known Jaehyun, he was never one to cry. Not one tear. He wouldn’t ever tear up either. So seeing him like this, vulnerable, was both shocking as it is confusing. 

“I just…” he sobbed, “I just love you so much. Please don’t ever leave me. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” To you, he wasn’t making much sense but he was still valid to have these thoughts. Some people have their off days and you guessed this was his.

“Of course not, Yoon Oh.” He cried harder, somehow pulling you even closer than before, his head still hiding in the shadows of your neck.

Moments passed by before he finally lifted his head up. He looked so ethereal though he was covered in tears and the image in front of you made you want to cry yourself. 

“You’re okay. I’m right here,” you cupped his face with both of your hands, wiping away the tears on his cheek with your thumbs. He does the same to you, although you’re not crying.

“I want you with me forever,” he whispered, searching through your eyes as if he doesn’t know you like the back of his hand.

“I’ll be here.”

You don’t know if you’re lying to him with the response. But only time can tell whether the guilt forever residing in your heart gets the best of you and inevitably, to the best of him. But he’ll get over it right? He’s Jeong Jaehyun after all.

—

You’re now laying side by side on your bed. He is being cradled in your arms as he continues to calm down in the drowsiness of the late hours of the night.

“I’m sorry about breaking down earlier. I just… I don’t know, I just felt super overwhelmed all of a sudden I guess,” he lifted his head up to look at your moonlit face.

You shook your head and stroked his hair. “Don’t apologize. You deal with me all the time,” you dryly chuckled.

“Because I know what you go through… But thank you,” he rubbed your back.

“For what?”

“For being there for me when I need you most. I really appreciate it…” he trailed off for a moment, “I really appreciate you.”

“Please…” he continued, “Come live with me.” 

You don’t know if it was sympathy, pity, pure love, or all of the above. But Jaehyun was very much aware that he could treat you like a queen. Which he already does, and that makes you all the more hesitant.

“You know that-” you’re cut off.

“I know. I know you refuse to but please. You’re my entire world, Y/n. I can’t even explain to you in words how much you and your entire existence means to me,” he’s desperate now. So desperate to finally have all of you. So, so desperate to watch you flourish into the beautiful bouquet he knows you are.

You sigh and continue to wrap your arms around his broad shoulders. “I’ll think about it.”

But the both of you knew the true meaning behind those words. Yet neither of you can say a word.

☹ ☹ ☹

It’s hard to ignore all of my problems

You couldn’t even count all of the imperfections and impurities that you had hiding within yourself. So much so, that you seem to project those imperfections onto the people around you. To the people that you love.

And sure, they might not notice them— ignore them, in fact— but they are clearly written out right in front of you and they don’t ever seem to go away. Which is probably why they say ‘you are your greatest enemy.’ It was true.

Yet of course, these thoughts had to swarm your mind at the grocery store. Grocery shopping, for crying out loud. With Jaehyun and with bunches of people who are too nosey to not look at you and not whisper to themselves as to why you are crying. 

With the shopping cart full, Jaehyun pulls it over to the side so as to not create traffic, and pulls you closer to him by your arms. 

He pushes the hair out of your face and leans down to see you. All of you.

“What’s wrong, my love?” He shushes you and wipes the tears off your cheeks.

This was absolutely terrible. Even the most domestic and everyday tasks were a hassle. And you felt like you were burdening Jaehyun in the busy market that only the wealthiest people had shopped at (since you were staying over Jaehyun’s again for a few days.) 

“Nothing, it’s- I’m okay,” you sucked in a breath and wiped your tears before looking up at him to meet his worried gaze.

“Are you sure?” He squinted his eyes.

You took in another breath before nodding.

“One hundred percent sure?” He patted your flyaway hairs down. You nodded again.

“I need words, angel. To make sure you’re okay. Really okay.”

“I’m okay, I promise,” you try to give him your best smile.

He only responds with the softest kiss to your forehead. 

“I need you to be with me,” he whispered against your skin.

“I am. One thousand percent. I’m okay,” you whispered back, now getting self conscious of the scene of you and Jaehyun canoodling in a grocery store on a Wednesday at eleven a.m.

He believed you, however the rest of the shopping trip went by slowly, awkwardly, and quietly.

You wished you could change the way you think. 

☹ ☹ ☹

Cause I'm no good (Ooh), you could do better (Ooh)

You should walk out, it's now or never

Ninety-nine percent of couples argue. Those statistics are completely true. No matter how often or how little, couples everywhere have their fair share of fights.

You and Jaehyun are one of those couples that rarely fight. Today, however, had not been very good to the both of you. Stress, anxiety, and more stress were eating at the both of you and now it landed you here. Just great.

“I don’t need you constantly taking care of me! I’m perfectly fine on my own!” You shouted toward him.

“Clearly you’re not if you break down every other day! I just want you to be okay,” he lets go and sits on one of the chairs in the living room. His face is hiding in his hands as he feels the anger and disappointment run through his brain.

Noticing this reaction, you sigh and furrow your eyebrows. It’s silent for a fleeting moment. “Why? You know I’ll be okay.”

You sit on the couch, opposite of the black leather chair Jaehyun is sitting in. 

“I know how much you’re hurting. And I don’t ever want you to feel those terrible feelings ever again. I want to be here for you and I want you to know that I want to be here for you. Can't you understand?”

It isn’t too much after he let out those words that you feel the tears fill up the sockets of your eyes and the void of the room. The walls that had now captured the two lovers screaming at each other now hear the abundant silence between them.

“I can't give you anything. You do so much for me and I’m just here.”

“I don’t care. No materialistic thing could ever compare to you just being here with me.” He gets up and sits next to you, making sure you know he’s with you the entire way.

“But it’s not enough.”

“Yes it is, Y/n. And I don't know what else to say to get through that thick head of yours. I love you for being you. And I love you for accepting me for who I am, not who I need to be. I don't need you to offer me anything besides your love.”

“That's the thing. I can only offer you my love.”

“I don’t care! Y/n, you need to realize how much you affect me. And I can't let you go around saying those words because they hurt me. It genuinely hurts me to hear those words.”

“…. I'm sorry.”

“Y/n, you truly don’t know how much you help those around you?”

It was silent for a moment.

“You work in a damn orphanage, for crying out loud! For fun. And it just makes me appreciate you. Appreciate how much you enjoy the happiness of other people. It’s all I could ever ask for.” He wiped the tears falling from your eyes.

“Please don’t cry. I just need you to know how much I love you. Why can't you see that? Do you not love me anymore?”

With zero hesitation, you released his hand from your face and stood up, “No! Don’t say that! Of course I still love you!”

“… it’s just that…”

“Don’t even say it, Y/n.”

The gloomy night has come to an end. And yet Jaehyun will not— will never— leave you behind. 

☹ ☹ ☹

Gonna regret being too honest

Callin' it love, but this isn’t fallin'

It’s the following morning. It is truly a gloomy morning, in fact. The rain was slowly pouring, the wind was rustling against the trees, and the upcoming fog coming from the ocean was painting the neighborhood.

The minute you woke up in Jaehyun’s arms, you remembered the fight the night prior. And, God, did you feel like an absolute ass.

Could this be it? It’s been three years and yet the question still lingers. Just why? It seems as though you bring him so much pain and yet he has chosen nothing but enduring the repercussions of your wrath.

You gradually regained the strength to get up and without a minute to spare, you quietly escaped out of Jaehyun’s protective arms to make breakfast. Some sort of remedy to help heal the pain of last night's argument.  

You sat on one of the island chairs waiting for the food to cook in the oven. Slowly but surely, you were once again trapped in your thoughts. Were you being too harsh? Were you being too honest? Were you actually enough to be with the most amazing man on planet Earth? 

All of these questions were paused by the padding of feet coming into the kitchen. You look up at him, not expecting anyone else. And in his dazed glory, Jeong Yoon Oh was still the most precious human being that had ever entered your existence.

“I’m sorry,” is the first thing you’re able to say before finally crying. Crying the waves of emotions that you felt the night before yet did not physically show.

He didn’t say a single word. He didn’t have to. All he did was take you in his embrace and whispered apologies and sweet nothings into your ears. The rest of the morning went by with stuffy noses and quiet munches.

—

“I’m sorry about last night,” you apologized once again, sitting on the bed watching him get ready through the mirror.

“It’s okay. I’m sorry too. I just want you to know that you can lean on me. You’ve been able to lean on me for years now…. I didn’t mean to yell but desperate times call for desperate measures,” says Jaehyun.

“But I'm not desperate at all, you know that.”

“Yes but don’t you know I’m so desperate for you?” 

[baeyrah]

HEPL ME FIND A FIC!!!

hi guyss, i know people don't know me at all, i don't have any followers or what so ever as I'm always a reader here..

but please I'm BEGGING you guys to help me find a taeyong's fic. I read it around 2 years ago.. i think...? 🥴

the plot is, taeyong is in mafia or a gang and he's in a mission. then they got ambushed or something that the other members had to flee first. taeyong's got hurt while fleeing and ended up at y/n's house.

then she treated him ( if I'm not mistaken she's a nurse) and like he fall for her, she fall for him, and then there's smutty scene... 👀 then if one of the member (as far as i remember doyoung) called him and say the gang needs him and he left y/n for few days then he come back and reveal the truth to y/n..

then taeyong want to get married with her and give up his title as the leader of mafia/gang. and then i don't really remember what happened but at the end taeyong died because he drank poison that was meant for y/n.. 😢

pleasee help me find itt, i cried for DAYS after reading this.. I'm DESPERATE!!!

[saturnznct]

mornings with your twins | j.jh

➸ note; nobody asked me to write this but the image was in my head so enjoy

➸ word count; 684 words

➸ amelia & alissa; aged 3 months

nct masterlist

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ ⋆✦⋆ ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

Jaehyun is so in love.

He doesn’t care that it’s the ass-crack of dawn, orange light streaming through the pink curtains of his infant daughters’ shared nursery.

He watches Alissa sleep while Amelia is laying on his chest in the armchair, drinking from a bottle of milk that you had pumped. She’s quite a loud drinker, making little grunts as she swallows and the occasional sharp breath in as she accidentally inhales air.

Jaehyun’s eyes are so heavy, his body begging him to go back to sleep but he can’t, he doesn’t want to. He wants to stay in the moment forever, in his little bubble of love.

You’re sound asleep in yours and Jaehyun’s bed, completely unaware of the wholesome scene taking place just next door. Jaehyun’s okay with that though, he wants you to sleep.

Jaehyun spends a few moments thinking about the best place to take her, before deciding on your small balcony.

Jaehyun spends a few moments thinking about the best place to take her, before deciding on your small balcony.

Jaehyun spends a few moments thinking about the best place to take her, before deciding on your small balcony.

He tiptoes through your bedroom, unlocking and sliding open the sliding door as silently as he possibly could, before stepping outside.

The sun is rising, halfway up and giving off a golden glow that makes Jaehyun look like an actual greek god, although no one is around to see it. He sinks into one of the armchairs and starts to pat Amelia’s back, just basking in the stillness and warmness of the early morning, until she burps.

‘Good girl,’ Jaehyun murmurs, ‘let’s just chill here for a bit though.’

Amelia grunts in response, and Jaehyun shifts her so that she’s laying in his arms rather than over his shoulder.

‘Oh yeah, good morning little one,’ he presses a gentle kiss to her forehead, ‘I love you.’

He readjusts her little socks and sleeves so that she’s definitely as warm as she can be.

Suddenly, the sliding door clicks open once again, and Jaehyun turns around to see you, half asleep, standing there.

‘Oh sorry baby, did I wake you up?’

‘No, I think I got cold since you weren’t there.’

You collapse into the chair next to him, admiring the scene in front of you. A completely glowing Jaehyun, barefaced and tired, holding one of your precious baby daughters in his arms.

‘Is she alright?’ You ask.

‘Yeah, she just needed a feed and then I took her outside to burp her.’

‘Oh, what about Alissa?’

‘Asleep,’ Jaehyun explains simply, ‘but I have a baby monitor here, so I’m listening out.’

‘Ah good,’ you’re still stretching and yawning.

‘You don’t have to sit out here,’ Jaehyun says softly, ‘you should go back to bed, get some rest.’

‘I wanna be out here,’ you murmur sleepily, ‘it’s quiet. Won’t be for long.’

‘You’re right,’ Jaehyun chuckles, ‘how about we sit here until she falls back asleep and then we’ll go back to bed?’

‘Mmph, yeah,’ your head is already resting on his free shoulder, and Jaehyun’s chest vibrates with laughter.

‘I love you,’ he turns his head slightly to press a kiss to your forehead, ‘thank you for this.’

‘For what?’ You mutter, the allure of sleep trying hard to pull you under.

‘Making all this love.’

‘Yeah,’ you snort, ‘we did a lot of that.’

‘No,’ Jaehyun smirks, ‘I meant for loving me. For building a family with me. For these two. The three of you are the light of my lives and I just want to thank you for everything.’

‘I love you too,’ you whisper, ‘you’re our… angel.’

Jaehyun chuckles, pressing several kisses to your head.

‘As you’re all mine.’

Just as Amelia finally burps, a shrill cry suddenly echos out from the baby monitor. Your eyes snap open.

‘Hey, how about you lay down in bed and cuddle with Amelia and I’ll bring Alissa in. I’ll get her a bottle and we can have a family cuddle?’

’Sounds amazing,’ you’re already taking Amelia from Jaehyun, ‘I’ll meet you there.’

[renjunsbabygirl]

12:37 AM

A loud deep groan escaped jaehyun's mouth as he orgasmed for the umpteenth time that night. How many orgasms had he had? You had no idea. You lost count after the fourth round.

"How's that, baby?" You asked, chuckling a bit at his fucked out form. You gave his cute little butt a soft spank. Your strap still buried balls deep in his ass.

"Fucking amazing," he breathes. "Let's go again."

"Jae, we've been going at it for nearly two hours now," you exclaimed. "I'm tired."

"Then let me ride you," he hurriedly suggested. "Let me ride you. Fuck, please let me ride you."

Gosh, you never realized how high his sex drive was up until this point.

"Okay, fine," you agreed. Gently removing the strap from his hole before moving over to the chair in the corner of the room. Jaehyun bounced off the bed with no problem. Like he wasn't just in doggy style for nearly two hours.

You sat down with your legs spread. The silicon strap standing high and tall. You open your arms, telling him to come on. He happily straddled your lap. His chiseled chest hovering over your face. Stroking your strap like it was an actual cock before aligning it to his hole. Slowly, he sank down on the strap. Closing his eyes and once again groaning loudly at the euphoric feeling.

You lick your lips at the sight. Planting your hands on his hips, massaging them as he slowly bounces up and down. Him doing the same by placing his hands on your shoulders.

"You're so pretty," you praise him. "Taking my cock like a good boy."

You give his nipple a few kitty licks before wrapping your mouth fully around it. This sets him off and he begins bouncing faster. Whimpers leaving his mouth out of pure bliss. You release his nipple from your mouth before doing the same to the other.

"Oh, my god," he moans, wrapping a hand around his throbbing cock. "I'm gonna cum."

Suddenly getting some energy back, you lifted him up slightly with all your strength, snapping your hips up to thrust back into him roughly. He vigorously jerks his cock. Biting his bottom lip harshly as he nears another orgasm. You remove one hand from his hip to wrap around his neck, pulling him into a wet hungry kiss.

He cums. Splattering his hot white semen on his hand, some landing on your chest.

He pulls away from the kiss to catch his breathe. Pieces of his curly black hair fell over his hooded eyes. You brush them to the side leaning your forehead on his. You remove his cum covered hand from around his cock. Replacing it with your own; slowly pumping it to ride out his high.

"Fuck, that was crazy," he muttered, breathlessly "Never thought I could do that."

"Never thought you'd have a higher sex drive than me," you laugh.

He slides off of the strap. Helping you out of the harness and placing it on top of the dresser. You're about to walk to the bathroom to run a bath for him but he stops you; setting you back down on the chair.

"What are you doing?" You questioned as he sat on his knees in front of you.

"You just gave me the bestest sex ever," he said grabbing your calf's, setting your legs on his broad shoulders. "Did you really think I wasn't gonna pay you back?" He asked.

But before you can even respond,

He dove right in.

-

I would like to apologize for being dead as hell for the past several months. I started college back in august and i barely have time for anything nowadays. y'all had no idea how bad my writers block was until rn. anyways, thanks for staying tuned! and as always, the requests are open so feel free to send in one! 💕✨groups are listed in my bio!

[peanutpinet]

Comfort - Jung Jaehyun x fem reader

[3.33 am] it was one of those nights. Where you just have the tendency to wake up in the middle of the night. No, you didn't have a nightmare. No urge to go to the bathroom. No sudden hunger, no anything. You just simply woke up. The difference? You woke up with Jaehyun, your boyfriend of 1 year, right next to you.

Because you were still within Jaehyun's embrace, you tried your best to not wake him up. You turned around, now actually facing your boyfriend's sleeping face. You gently put one of your hands to cup his cheek, using your thumb to caress it when you felt his head lean into your touch. Realising that you might've accidentally woke him up, you quickly retracted your hand but instead, it was held in place by Jaehyun's hand.

"What's wrong? Couldn't sleep?" Jaehyun whispered, in his hoarse voice

"No. I'm sorry I woke you. Go back to sleep Jae" you whispered back, stroking his hair in hopes that he'll fall back asleep

"I'm alright. You should sleep too. Did you have a nightmare?" Jaehyun asked, his voice still rough

"No. It's just a tendency I have. Just woke up for no reason. I'll fall asleep eventually. You just go ahead and sleep" you reassure him

"Now how can I go back to sleep knowing that my girl isn't? Hmm?" Jaehyun questioned, pulling your smaller body closer to his, your face now placed right below his chin

"I, I'll be fine, Jae" you muttered, just inhaling Jaehyun's scent as he peppered your forehead with kisses

Because neither of you are able to fall back asleep, you just stayed in that position as Jaehyun just peppered you with kisses. You were never one to be into anything intimate. Heck, you never really experienced this amount of physical contact until you dated Jaehyun, who was also your first boyfriend in your whole life up till now.

Even so, Jaehyun wasn't one to push you or even pressure you to do anything too intimate that would push your boundaries. Instead, he opted for the slow route which he didn't mind at all and when you actually showed little intimacy back, it just made Jaehyun's heart melt because he knows that you're also trying your best which is all Jaehyun could ever ask for.

But for some reason, instead of feeling sleepy or drowsy from waking up so sudden, you were feeling a bit daring. As Jaehyun was leaning down, you decided to look back up to him and pulled him into a warm kiss. Though shocked at first, inside, Jaehyun can feel his heart racing and happiness slowly building up.

Before you could pull away from the kiss, Jaehyun snuck his arm to the back of your neck, pulling you back into the kiss, this time, Jaehyun took control. At first, it was slow and soft since Jaehyun was still testing, unsure if you're okay with it. But when you started replying to his kiss, he felt like he just won the lottery. Jaehyun slowly put his other hand behind your back and lifted you off your sleeping position as he himself sat up straight, leaning back to the headboard.

Placing you right on his lap, Jaehyun took your legs and wrapped them around his waist, still not breaking off from the kiss. But his action caught you off guard that you jumped a little, placing both your hands on his board shoulder, finally pulling away from the kiss. Both because you were slightly embarrassed that that just happened but also to catch some breath. Noticing your sudden action, Jaehyun let you relax for a bit, putting his hands on your waist to steady you while checking if you were alright.

"Hey, hey, are you okay? Was I going too far?" Jaehyun asked, one of his hands made its way to your head, pushing some hair strands out of your face

"No, no, it wasn't your fault. I'm okay. It, it's just, I, I n-never really done this" you managed to speak up, avoiding Jaehyun's gaze

"You're cute when you're embarrassed. Hey, hey, look at me" Jaehyun plead, his fingers suddenly under your chin, turning you so you would look at him

"Let me take care of you, baby girl, hmm? Just let yourself go. Let me show you how much I care and love you. I won't touch you like you would think; even if you gave me your consent" Jaehyun sweetly whispered, kissing your forehead, down to your nose, to your cheek, right behind your ear and down to your jaw and finally to your neck as you just slowly buried yourself into the crook of Jaehyun's neck, enjoying each other's comfort and getting lost in each other's touch

People might think that you're crazy for saying how this is one of the reasons why you fell in love with Jaehyun. Sure, he had the looks, he knows how to make a girl's heart flutter. But looks and flirting aside, Jaehyun appreciates you to the point where he'd always put you before himself. He would make sure that you were always alright, that he wasn't taking the relationship too fast and to always remind you that you are enough.

A/N: can't you tell that Jaehyun has officially bias wrecked me? ahaha, but tbh, I don't remember if this was a dream or I was just too hallucinated by Jaehyun since sticker era began :"

[smoll-tangerine]

cerca trova

PAIRING. journalist!jaehyun x heiress/socialite!reader/oc GENRES. slice of life, friendship, drama, romance, college!au WORDS: 31.1k 

SYNOPSIS. cerca trova is an italian phrase that translates to “seek and you shall find”. it is also the name of an exclusive and elusive club at seoul national university. yet, there has never been concrete and solid proof that the club actually exists.

it has been officially a year since jaehyun started researching on this secret society and came up without any leads. until he accidentally bumped into a girl in a lion mask and a ball gown—quite literally.

PLAYLIST. sanctuary by joji • levitating by dua lipa • painkiller by ruel • my favourite clothes by rini • thick and thin by lany • blue by keshi • yellow by coldplay • like i want you by giveon • just the two of us by grover washington jr • mariposa by peach tree rascals

TAGLIST. @sehunniepot @plump-peach @jeongyoonohs @junghoe​ @crescent-iak

[a/n]: first of all, happy birthday angie!! i can’t believe that i managed to finish this right on your birthday, lol. if you got here first, i will also be updating he’s a man just for you uwu. hope you’re going to have a wonderful day and i miss you so much!! ♥

now, about the one-shot -- when i first started it, i expected to have romance as the main genre, but as i continued, the romance became more subdued and subtle so i apologize in advance to those who expected this to be heavy romance-oriented. cerca trova is a story that focuses a lot on the slice of life genre, college struggles and what-not. 

i was also heavily inspired by an episode of gilmore girls, but the rest of the plot is created by yours truly. with that said, enjoy lovelies! ♥ 

“It’s about time you give up on this story, Jung,” the editor-in-chief of his school’s paper, Taeil, told him with a tired sigh. It wasn’t news to anyone part of the paper that Jaehyun had been looking for clues about a famous yet secretive club of Seoul National University.

To be precise, it has been exactly a year since he heard of this club, Cerca Trova. It meant Seek and you shall find. It was rather ironic in Jaehyun’s situation. But when he accidentally stumbled upon some back issues of the paper and on an article that ended up with a cold lead, it sparked something in him and he was determined to find the truth.

He spent the whole summer gathering past information at the university. But it still wasn’t enough. Cerca Trova was a club that no one has really seen. And Jaehyun didn’t doubt that its members were unlikely to show themselves in front of him voluntarily.

Unless he found them first.

But who could possibly be part of this secret society that no one has ever seen?

“I swear I’ll be able to write it for the next upcoming issue,” Jaehyun told the older male fiercely, but his chief only raised an eyebrow at him, questioning the integrity of his leads. It was right of Taeil to doubt him. After all, his leads were never concrete, but purely theoretical with no actual proof backing them up.

“Tell you what, I’ll assign you the feature,” Taeil concurred—he knew how stubborn Jaehyun was—while the latter pumped his fist up in joy. “But, you’re going to have a backup article, as well, in case you don’t have every information needed for the secret society piece. I still need a feature printed out by next month.”

“Yes, I won’t disappoint you!” Jaehyun shouted before running back to his desk and started writing notes and bits of information.

It didn’t take long for his friends to hound around his desk.

“Barely a week back to school and you’re already on Taeil’s ass about the secret society piece?” Ten said and nodded approvingly. “Brave soldier.”

“Jae, I still don’t understand why you’re so obsessed with this club,” Jungwoo chimed in. “What’s so interesting about a secret society, anyway?”

“Exactly!” Jaehyun retorted back. “Because it’s secret. And as human beings, we hate being in the dark—hate not knowing the unknown. People will want to know more about it as soon as I have all the basics covered of not what this club is, but what they do.”

“Yeah, but it’s been a year since you’ve been on this case and you still have nothing,” Doyoung said with a small wince.

“I’m close, I’m telling you,” Jaehyun muttered as he ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “I just need an insider.”

Ten frowned and gave him a look. “You still haven’t found one?”

“Easier said than done,” Jaehyun replied with a look. “Do you think I’d still be on this piece after a year if I had an insider?”

“Touché,” Ten said with raised arms. “What have you got so far?”

Jaehyun had a guilty look on his face as he rubbed his temples roughly. “Don’t tell Taeil but honestly? Basically nothing.”

“Face it, Jaehyun,” Doyoung said with a sigh. “Cerva Trova is an urban legend at SNU, something to make other people think that nerds like us actually have cool people and a social life outside of GPAs and what-nots.”

“So, what’s your backup?” Jungwoo added. “Taeil asked you for a backup feature, right?”

Jaehyun stayed silent and refused to meet his friends’ eyes.

“Aaannd he has no backup,” Doyoung muttered. “Taeil is going to kick your ass if you come up with nothing by the deadline.”

But Jaehyun was adamant and would do anything to be able to write this feature. “I know. Call me crazy but I’ve got this gut feeling that I’m about to hit the jackpot or something, so I’ll stick with this for now.”

“You should take a break, Jaehyun-ah,” Ten advised him, worry evident in his face. “Don’t push yourself too hard. There’s more to life than our newspaper, you know? Take it easy.”

Jaehyun hummed while his friends weren’t sure whether he had heard Ten or not. They looked at each other at the same time and shrugged. They then each gave a comforting pat on Jaehyun’s back before retreating to their respective desks.

They knew there wasn’t any point in trying to convince Jaehyun otherwise.

A few hours later, Jaehyun tried not to growl in frustration as he downed his cup of coffee to find it empty. He groaned to himself and swivelled his chair around to ask his desk mate Doyoung if the latter wanted to grab another cup of caffeine with him, to only realize that everyone in the newsroom was gone except for him.

He sighed and rubbed his face as he got up to leave. Jaehyun closed up the office and decided to pass by the bathroom to freshen himself up before he abruptly bumped into someone.

“Oof,” he grunted as he almost fell onto the ground.

He raised his head to apologize to only take a few steps back when he saw a girl—at least, he thought it was a girl—in a pink gown and a giant plastic lion mask. Jaehyun wasn’t sure whether he was starting to see things due to his lack of sleep or numerous intake of caffeine. Either way, he told himself that maybe he should start laying off the iced Americanos and start sleeping more soon.

“Oopsie! I’m so sorry,” the girl said with a small giggle and sounded slightly toasted. “Are you okay?”

And for some reason, she sounded oddly familiar.

“Uh,” Jaehyun stuttered before he answered, almost in a daze, “Yeah, I’m fine.”

“Okay, great,” the girl exclaimed. “Have a great night!”

Jaehyun blinked repeatedly. “Oh, yes, you too?”

The girl curtsied as best as she could in her drunken state before departing the hall. Jaehyun scratched his head, unsure whether what he had seen was right, and decided to follow the girl. He was also worried about her state of mind.

By the time he had reached the exit, Jaehyun heard the girl exclaim loudly, “Memento vivere!” before hearing a round of shushes coming from inside the limousine as she entered the vehicle. He immediately took note of that in his cellphone and called it a night before walking back to his dorm room with a little giddiness.

He hadn’t the faintest clue of what he had just seen but Jaehyun had a feeling that this was exactly the jackpot he has been waiting for.

“Anybody knows if he actually went back to his dorm or not?” Doyoung muttered as he, Jungwoo, and Ten stared worriedly at Jaehyun from afar.

“So, do we ask him what’s going on, or not?” Ten quipped and stole a glance over at his younger friend. “I’m getting worried.”

“Looks like we’re not the only ones,” Jungwoo added before motioning their editor-in-chief who was approaching Jaehyun’s desk at an alarming speed.

“Jaehyun, listen, you’re a good friend of mine, and frankly, one of our paper’s best writers,” Taeil said with an awkward laugh. “But–”

The younger male raised a hand, silently asking for a moment as he typed something up on his computer, and turned around to face Taeil with the brightest smile the editor-in-chief had seen him sported since the beginning of the semester.

“Did I miss something?” the editor asked. “Or did you have too much coffee, instead? You know, I noticed that–”

“No, I finally have a lead for the feature!” Jaehyun exclaimed happily. For once, Taeil was glad to see that his friend’s adrenaline rush wasn’t due to his obsession with iced Americanos.

The chief editor’s eyes widened in disbelief. “Really? Tell me everything!”

“Okay, so yesterday night, maybe around 11 o’clock–”

“Wait, you stayed in the newsroom until 11?”

“Not the point.” Jaehyun waved his comment aside. “Anyway, as I was saying, yesterday night, as I left the newsroom and headed to the bathroom, I bumped into a girl.”

Taeil raised a questioning brow but didn’t comment further, waiting for his friend to continue with the story.

“But, get this—the girl was wearing a ball gown and a lion mask,” Jaehyun recounted to him. “So, being the full-fledged journalist that I am with my tingling investigating senses acting up, I decided to follow the girl.”

“Slightly stalker-ish,” Taeil commented with a frown but was intrigued with Jaehyun’s story. “But, go on.”

“I followed the girl out and she said this phrase, ‘memento vivere’, before entering a luxurious black limousine. I took note of it and decided to search it up and guess what?”

“What?”

“Turns out it was a phrase frequently used by a certain secret club at our university.”

Taeil’s eyes widened. “Shut up! So, you found an actual lead?”

Jaehyun tried not to be offended by the older guy’s choice of words—the latter wasn’t exactly lying either, though. “Yes, well, turns out that was the key to everything.” He turned his computer screen towards Taeil and pointed at the picture displayed. “Look what I found in our archives.”

The screen displayed a black-and-white picture showing a group of young people—university students, most likely—dressed up in Victorian outfits and jumping off a what seemed to be a small bridge into a pond with umbrellas in their hands. Underneath the picture lied a description that said Memento vivere.

“Huh, interesting,” Taeil muttered under his breath.

“Found this 1970 edition of our paper,” Jaehyun proudly boasted. “An article on whether this club actually exists or not.”

Taeil gave him a proud pat on the back. “Continue the good work.”

Jaehyun nodded his head and went back to his computer. His three friends immediately crowded around him and began interrogating him.

“You found a lead?” Doyoung said, almost in shock. “What is it?”

Jaehyun motioned the screen with his chin and used his mouse to circle a certain male on a new photo. “This is the only identified person on the picture. Suh Youngil… I wonder why his name sounds so familiar.”

“Dude.” Jungwoo gave him a dead-stare, clearly not impressed. “That’s Suh Johnny’s grandfather.”

Jaehyun raised his brows. “So…?”

“So?” Jungwoo repeated incredulously and continuously tapped the screen where the words Memento vivere were displayed. “Cerca Trova is a secret club that everyone knows about yet don’t know about. Super exclusive, as you mentioned countless of times.”

“Right.”

“Meaning, membership spans from the beginning of time,” Ten mumbled, almost in awe. “Dude, you just uncovered one of their secret sayings and proof that Johnny Suh’s grandfather was in it.”

Jaehyun’s eyes widened upon the realization. “Which means that Johnny’s father was in it. Which should mean that he’s in it too!”

“Bingo!” Doyoung exclaimed with sparkling eyes. “Say, aren’t you close with him since you two host the school’s radio show together? What was it called again? NCT–”

“–Night, Night,” Jaehyun completed his sentence. He immediately clicked on print and punched a fist in the air as he got up from his chair to retrieve the picture. “I’ll catch you guys, later. I’ve got an heir to interview.”

“You mean, interrogate.”

Jaehyun waved from behind as he left the office with the picture in his hands. “Same thing!”

He was about to greet his friend Johnny when he realized that the latter was with a female friend. They didn’t seem to have noticed him yet. Jaehyun wondered whether he should reschedule this meeting but thought that the matter was too pressing.

“Hey, Jaehyun!” Johnny greeted him with a handshake when the former realized that he arrived near their dorm building, where they had agreed to meet up. “Just got your text,” he informed him as he wiggled his phone in the air. “What was so urgent that we can’t talk about it before our broadcast tomorrow?”

Johnny was known throughout their campus for three things: his good looks, his tall height, and his social status. Those three aspects combined made him one of the most famous students at their university, not to mention his family owned a chain of hotels and donated quite a bit of money to their university. And if Jaehyun had to be honest, he was surprised that he was able to befriend such a person.

“Uh…” Jaehyun stuttered as his eyes fleeted towards the girl standing next to Johnny. She raised an amused brow at him though he couldn’t decipher her expression more than this at the moment.

“Oh, she’s cool, don’t worry,” Johnny reassured him before introducing them to each other. The girl then gave him her name, which sounded oddly familiar to him.

“Have we met before?” she asked him with a small tilt of her head.

Jaehyun wracked his brain trying to associate her face and her voice to a memory. He didn’t want to seem rude to one of Johnny’s friends. But there was just something about her that rang a bell in his head, but his mind was mostly preoccupied with the picture of Johnny’s grandfather.

“Oh, wait, we have Visual Anthropology and Macroeconomics together, right?”

Realization hit upon Jaehyun and he eagerly nodded at her words, but there was still something else nagging at him. Though, that was an issue to be dealt with, at a later time. Now, he needed to confront his friend about the article he found.

“So, Johnny, I was looking for you because I’m currently writing this article,” Jaehyun informed him. “You remember how I was stuck on this feature for over a year? The one about the secret society called Cerva Trova at SNU?”

The girl chimed in, “There’s a secret society at SNU?”

Johnny snickered. “My exact reaction when Jaehyun first told me about it.”

Jaehyun ignored their comments and continued, “Well, in order to make my article more, you know, legit, I need an insider—someone part of the club. So, I thought, why not my friend Johnny?!”

There was an awkward silence that passed between them after Jaehyun uttered the last three words. Jaehyun got to give it to his friend, Johnny’s poker face was great and his expression didn’t reveal anything that was going on inside of him.

“Me?” Johnny blurted. “I’m part of a secret society?”

“Damn, Johnny,” the girl commented with a disappointed groan. “Where the hell was my invite? I want to be part of a secret society too.”

“Sorry, dude,” his friend said with a half-smile. “The only club that I’m part of is the radio broadcast.”

Jaehyun didn’t want it to come down to this. But his pride as a journalist and the idea of an angry Taeil made him do the one thing he told himself he would never do as a journalist.

Because desperate times called for desperate measures.

“Well, I mean,” Jaehyun took out the picture he had printed earlier on and showed it to his taller friend, “how can you explain this, then?”

Blackmailing.

The female in their little group giggled as she peered at the piece of paper with great interested in her eyes. “Wait, no way. Is that Grandpa Suh? It doesn’t look like him. This man looks way too hot for him to be your grandfather.”

Johnny shot a small glare over at his friend, which didn’t go unnoticed by Jaehyun. The girl rolled her eyes in response. Johnny then folded the paper and tucked it away in his bag.

“I have more of those on my computer, so I guess you can keep it,” Jaehyun added cheekily.

Jaehyun had known Johnny since his first year with them being the DJs of their campus radio station. The taller male had always been someone nonchalant, easygoing, and radiating with positive energy and cheerfulness. In the three years he had known Johnny, this was the first time he ever felt intimidated by the latter.

He also knew that Johnny was the heir to a famous chain of hotels in the country, and the little group of friends he hung out with were part of the same social group. Jaehyun tried not to glance over at the girl with him. Was she an heiress to a major company too?

“I’m sorry to say that I have no clue of what you’re talking about, Jaehyun,” Johnny replied and scratched his head. “Both of us have class to go to now, so I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Jaehyun bit his bottom lip and nodded. He thought the picture was a good incentive to get Johnny to be his insider. But even if he had a picture of Johnny’s grandfather, it did nothing to help his case. He needed Johnny to bring him on the inside. 

The picture of Suh Youngil was just a possibility and a fact that had never been confirmed. An article without proof and evidence to back it up would just end up being a cheap article, a catty one. And he didn’t want his feature to become a conspiracy column or worse, a gossip one.

“Bye, Jaehyun!” the girl said in a sing-song way with a small wave of her hands as Johnny dragged her by the arm, almost angrily.

Johnny had to meet up with someone before our Statistics class, so I decided to keep him company while we waited for his friend to arrive. According to him, the matter was urgent. I shrugged in response when Johnny told me about it. It wasn’t like I was about to head to class without him.

“Hey, Jaehyun!” Johnny exclaimed before doing a handshake with the other male. I titled my head in curiosity. SNU’s campus was big, for sure, but here I thought I knew all the cute boys from our university.

The boy named Jaehyun looked familiar to me. There was something about his height, his voice, and his aura that rang some bells in my head, but I couldn’t pinpoint it exactly.

“Just got your text,” Johnny informed him. “What was so urgent that we can’t talk about it before our podcast tomorrow?”

Huh, so he was part of the radio broadcasting club with Johnny. I wondered why Johnny hadn’t told me anything about this friend of his.

I continued to stare at Jaehyun’s profile, trying to figure out just where exactly I had seen him before. My guts knew that I had met him before. But, where exactly?

“Uh…”

My eyes widened in recognition—that stutter.

He was the guy I bumped into yesterday night when I was slightly drunk. During the rookies’ initiation night.

Jaehyun’s ears reddened as he finally noticed the attention that I was giving him and I raised an amused brow when he glanced over at my direction.

“Oh, she’s cool, don’t worry,” Johnny quipped before introducing me to his friend. Jaehyun then repeated my name before introducing himself to me.

I liked the way my name rolled off from his tongue.

I tilted my head when he looked a bit puzzled as if he had heard of my name somewhere. And now that I thought about it, I did recall sharing a few classes with him but never went out of my way to socialize with him. After all, we didn’t exactly run in the same social circle. But I guess now I had a reason to, though.

“Have we met before?” I asked in a teasing tone.

I could already see Johnny rolling his eyes at me from the back of my head. Although my question was completely harmless and meant to come out as flirty, I doubted that he would recognize me as the girl he bumped into yesterday night without my lion mask on. But I wasn’t about to reveal that to him.

Jaehyun seemed taken aback with my question and seemed to ponder hard on it. I tried not to giggle at his efforts. It was rare to see such a genuine and innocent guy like Jaehyun in our world. In mine and Johnny’s. No wonder Johnny liked him. If he didn’t, I doubted that Johnny would even bother remembering his name.

“Oh, wait, we have Visual Anthropology and Macroeconomics, together, right?” I said, sparing him from an awkward situation.

Jaehyun’s mouth formed an ‘o’ and nodded eagerly upon the realization. But he didn’t seem too preoccupied with our mutual classes and cut straight to the chase.

“So, Johnny, I was looking for you because I’m currently writing this article,” he then said. “You remember how I was stuck on this feature since my first year? The one about the secret society called Cerca Trova at SNU?”

I tried not to show how intrigued I was by his statement.

Well, this certainly was getting interesting.

“There’s a secret society at SNU?” I chimed in, fascinated. I wondered how Jaehyun even got this information and how was he going to proceed with this. I could feel Johnny radiating some of his anxiety which was why I decided to intervene.

My friend seemed relieved by my help and faked a snicker. “My exact reaction when Jaehyun first told me about it.”

Jaehyun ignored us. “Well, in order to make my article more, you know, legit, I need an insider—someone part of the club. So, I thought, why not my friend Johnny?!”

I admit, I was slightly taken aback with Jaehyun’s accusation – if I could call it that. It wasn’t the fact that he pinpointed Johnny as a member of the secret society that dumbfounded me. It was how confident he was about his theory.

I glanced over at my tall friend who sported the same expression as I did, but I could tell there were a few cracks in his perfected mask. Perhaps Jaehyun couldn’t see it, but I could. Johnny was an easy person to read if you looked beyond his charisma and optimism.

“Me?” Johnny finally replied. “I’m part of a secret society?”

I tried not to roll my eyes at his belated response. I mentally sighed and continued to provide my support to him. After all, if Johnny cracked under the pressure, then the other members and I could be affected too.

“Damn, Johnny,” I exclaimed with a disappointed groan. “Where the hell was my invite? I want to be part of a secret society too.”

Ugh, this giant owed me big time.

“Sorry, dude,” Johnny said with a half-smile. “The only club that I’m part of is the radio broadcast.”

Jaehyun did not seem to be bothered by Johnny’s refute. “Well, I mean,” he said as he took out what seemed to be a piece of paper and showed it to us. “How can you explain this, then?”

I peered over Johnny’s tall shoulder and unintentionally let out a small giggle when I realized who was the man in the picture. “Wait, no way. Is that Grandpa Suh? It doesn’t look like him. This man looks way too hot for him to be your grandfather.”

But what amused me even more was how desperate Jaehyun was for an insider. To the point where he was willing to blackmail Johnny with a photo of his grandfather taken during his time spent part of Cerca Trova. Our motto Memento Vivere splattered across the picture.

We had countless of journalists from our university’s newspaper trying to hunt us down and write a feature on us, but never had one of them even came close with actual proof, let alone figure out its members. I wondered how did he even find this picture.

Actually, I was curious how this photo ended up with the newspaper club to begin with.

I could tell that Johnny was sweating bullets since the proof handed to us was a picture of his grandfather.

Johnny didn’t seem to appreciate my comment as he subtly glared at me. I actually rolled my eyes this time. I thought that he was freaking out over nothing. A picture of Johnny’s grandfather was just the tip of the iceberg. If Jaehyun truly wanted to uncover everything there was about Cerca Trova, then he still had a long way to go.

“I have more of those on my computer, so I guess you can keep it,” Jaehyun added with a cheeky smile.

I was starting to like this guy more and more. But I could also tell that Johnny was liking Jaehyun’s presence less and less. Johnny’s friendly demeanour just diminished the slightest, meaning he was slowly getting annoyed and frustrated with this conversation.

Suh Youngho might be an easygoing person, but even I wouldn’t want to cross him whenever he was irritated.

“I’m sorry to say that I have no clue of what you’re talking about, Jaehyun,” Johnny slowly said and scratched his head. “Both of us have class to go to now, so I’ll see you tomorrow?”

I unknowingly pouted, a tad saddened that I couldn’t spend more time getting to know Jaehyun.

He bit his bottom lip and nodded at Johnny. My friend mirrored his actions before walking off towards the building where our Statistics class was held and dragged me along fiercely while muttering curse words under his breath.

I snorted at Johnny’s actions and bade Jaehyun good-bye with a small wave of my hand, ignoring Johnny in the process. “Bye, Jaehyun!”

Jaehyun waved back at me, an indescribable expression on his face, and I turned to the front. I instantly pried Johnny’s hand from my arm and whined when I saw how red it was. “What the hell, Suh? You didn’t have to grab me that hard.”

“Shit, shit, shit!” He fast-walked as he ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “How did he get that picture?”

I tried to keep up with his speed. Damn him and his long legs. “Why don’t you—oh, I don’t know—ask him about it?”

He suddenly halted in his steps and turned to me with an angry, almost accusatory stare. “It’s called a secret society for a reason.”

I shrugged. “You didn’t really let him explain, either. Maybe he just wanted to write an article on us without revealing everything.” My brows furrowed. “Isn’t he your friend? Perhaps you should give him the benefit of the doubt.”

Johnny was the one to roll his eyes this time. “Oh, keep it in your pants, would you? You’re always like this when a pretty boy is in the picture.”

I bat my eyelashes at him, faking an innocence air with the best of my abilities. “Whatever do you mean?”

He narrowed his eyes at me before shaking his head. We continued our walk to our class.

“I mean–”

“Don’t. Even. Think. About. It.” Johnny’s glare was fiercer than ever as he muttered those words to me through gritted teeth.

Intimidated was the last thing I felt at the moment. I knew how Johnny could be whenever he was pissed, but he was still far from reaching his limit. And besides, seeing him act this way made my day too. I enjoyed pissing him off.

Let’s just say it was payback for all those times he used to pull on my pigtails when we were kids.

“Well, we live in a democratic society for a reason, don’t we?” I refuted cheekily. “We’ll put it on a vote with the council.”

Johnny scoffed. “The council will never agree to it.”

“Well,” I smiled mysteriously at him, “good thing the President can veto any decision the council makes.”

“That’s a complete abuse of power!” he whined as we entered our classroom and settled in our respective seats. “Don’t do this just because you’re interested in a boy. I mean, you got plenty of other options! Does it have to be that one guy who is determined to uncover our club?”

I rested my chin on the palm of my hand and grinned at him sweetly. “Well, weren’t you the one who said that he was just so pretty?” I then returned my attention back to the front when the professor started the class. “And besides, he seems nice.”

Johnny seemed flabbergasted by my statement. “What? Don’t tell me you’re actually considering him as a potential boyfriend?”

I shrugged. “I don’t see why I cannot be interested in him.”

He stayed silent and took out his class notes. “You being interested in him isn’t the issue. The real question is, why would he be interested in you?”

I gasped dramatically and punched his arm. “You take that back! I am a very desirable woman, thank you very much.”

He rolled his eyes as he rubbed the sore spot on his arm. “You know that’s not what I mean. I meant, would he still want to be with you if he were to step into our world. I mean, I’m all for the Princess and the Pauper storyline, but would he be able to deal with it?”

I frowned at his words. I never thought about it that far even though I should have since that was always something that prevented me from getting myself in an actual relationship. And besides, even if I started dating Jaehyun, I doubted that it would become so serious that I would introduce him to my family. I’d never reached that stage in any of my past relationships. So, I wasn’t too worried either way.

“Johnny, that’s not how the Prince and the Pauper story goes.”

“Really? That’s your takeaway from everything that I just told you?”

I groaned. “Relax. I get what you mean. But, right now, you’re being way too serious for my taste.”

“Well, a little warning never hurt anyone.”

I stared dead at him, unimpressed. “Look, Youngho, we still have—like, what?—barely a year of freedom before graduating? Before we have to work our ass up the social and economic hierarchy of our family’s company? You know that not any one of us is searching for anything serious during our time in university. Why else did we even join Cerca Trova? John, what’s our club motto?”

“Memento Vivere.”

“And what does it mean?”

“Remember to live.”

“Exactly.” I grinned at him. “Remember to live. This is our time—not our parents’ or our family elders’. This is the only time we get that they cannot control. If I want to date a guy that they don’t approve, this is the only time I’ll get.”

Johnny’s lips thinned as if miffed by something I said. “But… what if you fall for Jaehyun? Like, really fall for him? You’d break up with him if your parents ask you to?”

My hands unconsciously clenched at his question and quickly reverted my eyes back to the classroom’s blackboard.

“Youngho, you should know that in our world, getting to pick the person with whom we want to spend the rest of our life, is one of the few luxuries we cannot afford.”

I leaned back against my armchair as I watched the scene unfold before me. We were a chaotic bunch, that was for sure, but today’s order of the day sent my friends in a rampage. As Johnny had suspected from beginning, the council wasn’t too keen about my suggestion.

Our weekly meetings were held at my house since I was the President. It was tradition to play billiard during the meetings. I didn’t know who started it, but at times, I would resent that person only because the games would become too rowdy for my taste. Not exactly due to the game itself but because it was already difficult enough for us to come to a mutual decision.

And adding competitive people to the mix didn’t help much.

“I think it wouldn’t do us any harm if that journalist writes an article about our club,” Taeyong, one of my closest friends said as he leaned against the side of my chair, his cue stick under his armpit as he kept his arms crossed across his torso.

I looked up at him with a huge smile. “My point exactly, thank you. I always knew why you’re my favourite out of everyone here.”

“Wow, gee, it’s not like your childhood best friend is in the same room or anything,” Johnny commented from the corner.

I rolled my eyes. “Get over it, Youngho.”

Seulgi, the only other girl who was an executive member, piped up. “Well, Taeyong has a point. As long as he follows our conditions, I don’t see why an article about our club cannot be published.”

Hendery wailed in disapproval. “It destroys our club’s whole mystique! The whole beauty about Cerca Trova is that nobody knows if it actually exists. To publish a feature about us will confirm our existence. And once our existence is confirmed, then there’s nothing appealing about the club anymore! It’s just going to be like any one of those lame clubs out there!”

“Why do you insist on allowing this journalist to write a feature on us, anyway?” Sicheng, who usually remained neutral in these types of situation, asked with a curious smile as he poised himself to play.

“Knowing our dear President,” Johnny drawled, “is that really a question you can’t answer yourself?”

Sicheng snorted before hitting one of the billiard balls. “Forget I asked. My vote is a no.”

“Well, other than ruining our club’s mystique,” I said as I gave a pointed look to Hendery, who stuck out his tongue at me, “are there any other reasons why we can’t let Jaehyun write an article about us?”

The opposition remained silent.

“He has proof that my grandfather was in it!” Johnny asserted with a certain glint in his eyes. “If he publishes that photo, then it gets back to me.”

I huffed through my nose. “That’s a weak-ass excuse and you know it. And besides, worst comes to worst, we’ll make him sign a gag order.”

“A gag order?” Hendery’s brows raised in surprise. “You’re willing to go that far just for a puny university newspaper?”

“You three are the ones who are worried about getting exposed by this puny university newspaper,” Seulgi muttered as it was her turn to play.

“And besides,” I continued cunningly, “he’s the one who needs us more than we need him. I’m certain he’d be willing to accept whatever conditions we might impose on him.”

The ones who were at first reluctant to allow this, now seemed to have warmed up to the idea.

“Hey, are you going to pass on this round, as well?” Taeyong asked me as it was finally my turn to play.

I hummed as I got up from my seat and cracked my back before grabbing my cue stick from the wall. I walked up to the pool table and looked at my friends with a proposition in mind. “How about this? I win this last round, and we’ll go with whatever decision I make.”

Johnny crossed his arms and pondered about my deal. “And if you lose?”

“Then the matter will be forgotten and will never be brought up again.” I tilted my head at the three. “So, what do you say, boys? Care to have a wager with me?”

All five of them peered over at the pool table to figure out where the black eight ball was. That was the ball I needed to hit into a pocket to win the game. And it was a ball that was nearly impossible to hit. One bad shot and I’d lose the wager.

“You’re on,” Hendery said with a small snort.

I positioned myself where I thought it was best to hit the cue ball and leaned down with my left eye closed as I was right-hand dominant. When I got the angle down, I hit the cue ball with a soft thud of the tip of my cue stick. I rose from my position and looked at the white ball roll towards the black one. Everyone in the room held their breath as they waited for the final result.

The cue ball hit the black one and the latter slowly rolled towards one of the pockets, before ultimately falling into it.

“And that’s how you win, boys.”

Johnny mumbled something incoherent. Although they could be sore losers at some times, they always honoured their side of the bargain.

“Alright, write down the conditions and send it to Taeyong,” I ordered as I placed back my cue stick back on the cue rack on the wall. 

“Is he going to shadow us until the end of the year?” Seulgi asked.

Johnny shook his head. “Nah, he mentioned it was for a feature. Seeing that the newspaper only releases an issue once a month, I’d say he needs his article before the end of next month.”

“I’ll only allow him to shadow us during one event and that’s it,” Sicheng demanded. “Take it or leave it.”

“I agree,” I said, surprising Sicheng. “And what better way to show him the true essence of Cerca Trova than to invite him to our annual Victorian retreat?”

Hendery groaned. “The other members won’t approve of this.”

“Well, one, they’re not an executive member so I don’t give a rat’s ass about what they think,” I replied, slightly irritated. The decision was already made, and they lost fair and square. I didn’t understand why they still tried to make up excuses. “And two, if they’re not happy with the decision, they’re free to leave. They already signed a gag order when they first joined so I’m not worried either.”

I raised a brow at him, directing my comment at him. Hendery seemed to have gotten my message and sighed in resignation. But I didn’t like seeing my friends in a bad mood either. And since I was the selfish one who made the request, it would be unreasonable of me to not give them another compromise.

“I’ll take full responsibility,” I said, hoping that it’ll relieve those initially opposed of some of their worries—whatever they may be. “If this whole thing turns out to be disastrous, I’ll resign from my position as President and quit the club. Is that enough collateral for you guys to stop getting on my last nerve?”

They simultaneously nodded at my question.

“Alright, you guys handle the details and I’ll take care of the journalist,” I instructed. “Our weekly meeting is now adjourned.”

It was only a week later, when the executives have finally completed their list of demands, that I was able to speak to Jaehyun about his article. Given that our shared classes were both at the end of the week, I figured that finding him in the newsroom would be more efficient.

“Uh, Jaehyun, you have a visitor?” one of its club members shouted back into the room while looking back at me with something similar to panic.

I saw Jaehyun jogging up to the newsroom’s entrance. “Yeah, what’s up, Doyoung?”

The guy named Doyoung pointed at me and whispered to him, “You know her?”

I saw Jaehyun’s brows furrowed as he turned to who was his friend pointing at. They immediately shot up in surprise as he stuttered out my name and asked, “W-what are you doing here?”

“Hiya!” I said brightly with a wiggle of my fingers. “I’m here for you, silly!”

“For me?” he replied, confusion present in the face he was making. “What for?”

For an aspiring journalist, he sure was dafter than I expected.

“For our Macroeconomics project, of course!” I said with a tight smile, hoping that his friend wouldn’t catch on. “You know, the one that’s due on the same day as your article of your secret society piece? You mentioned that you wanted to work on it so that you can focus the rest of your time on the article.”

If by now, Jaehyun didn’t catch my drift, then I’d give up.

Thankfully, he did and enthusiastically nodded to his friend. “Oh, right. Right!”

His friend, Doyoung, frowned. “Wait, I thought we were going to do the Macro project together?”

I laughed awkwardly. “Did I say Macro? I meant to say Visual Anthropology! I must have mixed those two up since we’re both in the same class.”

“Yes!” Jaehyun, thankfully, went along with my bit. “She meant the Visual Anthropology one.

“Right,” I repeated, my awkward smile still intact.

“Okay…” Doyoung said with a weird look on his face. “I’ll leave you two to it, then.”

Jaehyun turned to me with the most confused expression I’d ever seen. I winked at him as I beckoned him to follow me. “Let’s go somewhere quieter.”

That was how we ended up in the university’s library, pretending to peruse the Anthropology section.

“We’re not actually here for our project, right?” Jaehyun asked with an awkward yet somewhat nervous chuckle. “Am I reading this wrong completely?”

“Jaehyun, we’re not even actually on the same team.”

“Oh, right.” He seemed taken aback and he rubbed the back of his neck. “So, why did you want to see me, then?”

My eyes blinked, my only visible reaction to his question, as I wondered whether he was really this oblivious when he managed to uncover one of our club’s alumni.

And speaking of that– 

“How did you come to the conclusion that Johnny’s grandfather was part of this secret society that you were talking about?”

His brow twitched just the slightest at my question. The kids could hate me all they want for accepting Jaehyun within our ranks, even temporarily, but as President, I still felt the responsibility to assure that this would never happen again—that no one could uncover us as easily as this guy.

So, you could say that I also had my own ulterior motives behind approaching Jaehyun other than the one that Johnny had mentioned.

“Why do you ask?” he asked inquisitively. “A real journalist never reveals his sources.”

I exhaled deeply through my nose. This was going to be harder than I thought.

“Well, Johnny isn’t going to help you anytime soon, but we are family friends. I’ve known Grandpa Suh since I was a kid.” I grinned mischievously. “I’m sure he doesn’t mind doing me a favour or two.”

He narrowed his eyes at me. “What’s in it for you?”

“What, indeed.” I huffed, keeping my amused expression on. “How about you entertain my question, first?”

He continued to stare at me, unblinking, before he sighed in resignation as he recalled, “I’ve bumped into this girl in a pink ball gown and a lion mask a couple of nights ago. Completely toasted. I’m not even sure if she remembers me.”

So, it all started from that night?

“It was dead in the middle of the night. I was probably one of the few left in the building, so you could imagine my surprise when I literally crashed into her. I thought that I was hallucinating for a second. But, then I decided to follow her. I mean, what was the harm in doing so?”

I nodded, silently asking him to go on.

“I then saw her heading inside a limousine as she shouted Memento vivere,” he continued. “I thought it was weird so I decided to search it up. And the phrase surprisingly came up in the search results of our newspapers archive. Scrolled through the results all night and found this picture in one of our back issues.”

Bingo.

Although I was satisfied that with the results of my interrogation, I felt slightly guilty that I was perhaps the reason why Jaehyun was able to come this far with his research. Granted that the right timing and luck had a lot to do with it as well, but it didn’t change the fact that he was a witness and he clearly remembered the words that I had proudly proclaimed in the middle of the night.

Even if I was slightly drunk, that was still rather reckless of me.

Taking responsibility in this situation was all I could do.

“I see,” I said and held a finger up, “give me a minute to reply to this text.”

I immediately forwarded all the pertinent information to Taeyong. You know what to do, I typed. He replied with a thumbs-up emoji. I then pocketed my phone back into my bag and took out an envelope that our club had specially prepared.

“Well, Jaehyun, today must be your lucky day!”

“Uh, w-why?”

“Because,” I confided, “I’m that girl you’ve bumped into.”

The surprise that washed over his face was worth all the backlash I’ve received from my friends. His mouth opened and closed and gaped like a goldfish. A very cute one.

But Jaehyun quickly regained his composure and cleared his throat. “Prove it.”

I scoffed incredulously, though I did admire him a little bit for his daringness. “Prove it?” I repeated with blinking eyes and crossed arms. “Shouldn’t I say that to you?”

“W-well–”

“Either way, it’s up to you whether you want to believe me or not,” I cut him off, “but as the President of this secret society you have been after for so long, I’m here to offer you a proposition.”

“A proposition?” His eyes sparkled at my words but then shook his head with a hand held up. “Wait, hold up a second. You’re the club’s President? The leader of Cerca Trova?”

My nose scrunched up in response. “Well, say it any louder for everyone to hear, would you?”

His hands immediately went to his mouth and I giggled. He then repeated his question, though this time his voice slightly above a whisper. “You’re the President? You’re not messing with me, are you?”

“And why would I do that?” I said. “I’m taking a risk here, buddy, and you think I’m joking around?” I then held the manila-coloured envelope in-between my index and middle finger, making sure that the wax seal with the club’s coat of arms was visible to him. And by how much his eyes widened at the sight, he knew that I wasn’t playing around.

“Judging by your reaction, I’d say you’ve done your research and recognize our coat.”

He gulped and kept his eyes on the envelope as he asked, “What’s your proposition?”

“I’ll help with your article for the paper,” I answered. “Get you on the inside. But there are some conditions you need to agree to.”

“What conditions?”

“Well,” I tilted my head to the side, “the first condition is you have to agree before you know the conditions.” I then raised my chin at him, curious about his decision. “So, what do you say, Jaehyun?” I slightly shook the envelope. “Are you in or out?”

The male bit his bottom lip in contemplation before giving me a firm nod of his head.

“I’m in.”

I handed him the envelope, satisfied with how the events had turned out.

“I’ll see you soon, then.”

Jaehyun fiddled with the envelope he had received almost a week ago, hidden deep inside his hoodie’s pocket. He didn’t dare to part with it, scared that someone might see it and ask questions he was not ready to answer. 

Ever since then, he kept bumping into the girl. Granted, he did share two classes with her. But although they had been attending the same university for the past three years, he didn’t understand how it was only recently that he met her. Or seen her so often.

So often to the point that his friends were pointing it out.

“So,” Jungwoo drawled from his side as they just finished purchasing a hot drink from the coffee cart. “I heard from Doyoung that you’re getting close to a certain girl from our Visual Anthropology class, huh?”

“Ooh, what’s this about?” Ten said with a wriggle of his eyebrows.

“It’s nobody,” Jaehyun mumbled, almost shyly. “It’s nothing.”

“She isn’t just nobody.” Doyoung snorted. “The girl has a whole Wikipedia page.”

“Well, Johnny and his friends all have Wikipedia pages, so what’s your point?” Jaehyun shot back.

“I’m just saying,” Jungwoo continued, “you’ve been spending an awful lot of time with a girl you claim there’s nothing going on.”

“Oh, oh, oh, and speak of the devil, isn’t that her over there?” Ten announced excitedly.

“Don’t say it so loudly, she can hear us!”

Almost as if on cue, the girl turned around with a small furrow of her brows but it her look of confusion instantly disappeared when her eyes landed on him. “Jaehyun-ah!” She waved at him with a smile.

“Hey!” he greeted back warmly.

The girl bade her friends good-bye, some Jaehyun recognized as part of Johnny’s circle, and made her way over. Jaehyun ignored his friends’ jeers and tried not to crumple the piece of paper hidden in his hoodie as she walked over.

“Hey, so I was wondering if you’re free this Friday?”

“T-this Friday?” Jaehyun stuttered out. He almost wanted to slap himself for being so nervous even though he couldn’t comprehend why. “Yeah, I am.”

“Me and Johnny and some of our other friends are planning to hang out,” she continued. “You mentioned last time that you had something going on and that I should invite you the next time we have a gathering.”

It took a few seconds for it to click in his head, but Jaehyun tried not to make it too obvious that he hadn’t a single clue of what she was talking about. Three awkward seconds had passed until Jaehyun finally let out an exaggerated, “Oh, yes! I did say that.”

The girl, thankfully, didn’t try to slap the back of his head even though she looked like that was the only thing she wanted to do at that moment. “Right, um, I’ll text you the details,” she said with an awkward chuckle and waved at him and his friends before leaving them abruptly.

“There’s nothing between you two, my ass,” Ten muttered and gave him a small punch on his arm. “What was that about?”

“Wait, I didn’t tell you guys?” Doyoung exclaimed out of nowhere. “She came by the newsroom last time to look for Jaehyun.”

Jaehyun rolled his eyes. “She came by to see me for a class assignment.”

“And she couldn’t text you, instead?” Jungwoo snickered with a knowing, teasing look. “Face it, she probably got a thing for you.”

“She doesn’t!” Jaehyun retorted and walked away quickly. “Now let’s go before we’re late for class.”

But now that he thought about it, Jaehyun had never given her his phone number. So, how was she going to contact him?

“Are you sure that he agreed?” Johnny complained from the driver’s seat while I leaned back from mine in the shotgun. “We’re going to be late if he’s not arriving anytime soon.”

I bobbed my shoulders. “Text him if you’re that worried.”

“No.”

I rolled my eyes at how impatient my best friend was being. Albeit part of his shitty attitude lied in my fault. A knock was then heard from outside the window. I looked back to the two other members that sat in the back.

“Who is it?” Hendery asked out loud, not even bothering to lower the window.

“Who else, you moron,” Seulgi muttered under her breath, her sunglasses perched on her nose.

“Seulgi, be nice,” I tutted at her, though I couldn’t help but let out a small snicker. I always enjoyed seeing a cranky Seulgi—except when I was the one at the end of her wicked tongue—paired up with a good old hangover.

She groaned out loud and rubbed her forehead. “It’s too early!”

“Seulgi, it’s four in the afternoon,” I deadpanned. “Now, can someone please just let him in before the knocking makes Seulgi crabbier.”

“Is that even possible?” Hendery replied.

“Do you really want to find that out right now?” Johnny flipped his whole body around incredulously. “Should I remind you that we have a long car trip ahead of us?”

Hendery didn’t need to hear more and immediately opened the door, startling Jaehyun who looked like a deer caught in headlights with his fist up in the air.

“Oh, um, hello?” Jaehyun stuttered out with an awkward wave of his hand.

“Come on in!” Johnny waved him inside.

Hendery got out of the car before pushing the taller male back in, settling the latter between him and Seulgi. I assumed it was because he didn’t want Seulgi to throw a punch at him in case he annoyed her, which was frequent.

“Alright, one of you two blindfold him, please,” I instructed the two members in the back, “or else we cannot get a move on.”

“Seulgi, you do it,” Hendery asked as he threw the satin blindfold at the girl, who scoffed in disbelief.

“Why can’t you do it?” she refuted as she removed her dark sunglasses and glared over at Hendery.

“Because I’m a dude, duh!”

She spluttered, slightly taken aback with his retort. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“It’s weird blindfolding a guy, okay?”

“Oh, boohoo. Suck it up, you–”

Jaehyun ripped the blindfold from Seulgi’s hands and tied it around his eyes himself, causing the two bickering children to shut their mouth in disbelief. He then sighed in satisfaction before attempting to tie his seatbelt blindfolded, and managed to do so in five long excruciating silent seconds.

“Alright, I’m ready to go!” Jaehyun said with a fiddly woot. “I don’t know why I need to be blindfolded but if it’s going to bring peace, then I’ll do it! You guys could have just asked me to do it from the beginning, you know?”

“You heard that, you bimbo?” Seulgi clucked at Hendery before throwing him a small punch causing the latter yelped in pain.

Johnny shook his head and started off the car before driving out from the campus.

“So, where are we going?” Jaehyun asked as he felt the car moving.

“The destination is a secret, I’m afraid,” I replied. “Why else did we blindfold you, otherwise?”

“So, how come you guys are not wearing your lion masks, this time around?”

“Wow, you’re diving right in, aren’t you?” Johnny commented.

“Ignore John,” Seulgi advised him, “he’s still a bit bitter about how you managed to find that picture of his grandfather.”

“By the way, that’s Seulgi,” I told him. “The guy on your left is Hendery.”

“O-oh, nice to meet you both.”

“Likewise,” my two friends in the back echoed.

A couple of hours later, we finally arrived to our destination. Hendery ran out of the car, followed by Johnny who was in search of a bathroom. Seulgi’s mood seemed to have improved thanks to a little nap and waited for Jaehyun to come out of the car before locking it. But other than that, she kept her distance.

“We’re in the middle of nowhere,” Jaehyun stated in awe as he turned in circles, admiring the scenery around us, his blindfold off.

“We’re in the middle of a forest,” I corrected. I motioned him to follow me as I walked towards the table where there were little portable, vintage hand lanterns for us to use. “By the way, this thing is overnight.”

“O-overnight?”

I stopped in my tracks and looked back at him with a raised brow. “Is that going to be a problem?”

He hesitated as he thought about his words awfully carefully. “Well, I mean, it wasn’t mentioned in the invitation. So, I assumed–”

“So, it is a problem.”

“No!” he shouted back. “I mean–”

“Well, I guess I don’t mind driving you back, right now.”

He doubled at my words. “Wait, right now? What do you mean, right now?”

I snorted. “Well, you can’t exactly expect any of us to drive you back after we get ourselves hammered, now can you?” I cocked my head to the side. “You do remember in what state I was the first time we supposedly met each other?”

“Kind of hard to forget, if you ask me.”

I rolled my eyes but not at all offended and smiled back at him reassuringly. “Look, what we’re going to do tonight is completely safe and legal, so don’t worry too much about it, alright? And I made the members promise not to bite.”

For the first time of the evening, Jaehyun finally cracked a smile.

“There we go,” I said and hooped my arm around his before pulling towards where Johnny and the others had run off.

“So, what can I expect from this?” Jaehyun asked, his eyes sparkling with excitement.

“I didn’t know you had expectations.”

“Well, I have been trying to get a lead about this feature for about a year, now. So, can you really blame me?”

“Tell me, then! What exactly have you been expecting?”

We finally arrived at the place where the others were and Jaehyun immediately halted in his steps, almost as if he was faltering from the sight.

“Not… this…?” he mumbled in a daze.

We had planned this event since even before summer vacation had started. Since it was the first official event of Cerca Trova’s social calendar, it was imperative that we went all out while following our club’s past tradition of hosting a camping trip. Though, due to our generation’s more expensive taste, we decided to glamourize it a little bit.

Instead of typical camping tents, we had rented out white Swiss cottage fabric tents for everyone to use and sleep for the weekend getaway. Wooden tables with Victorian tablecloths and candlesticks decorated the whole area which was in the middle of the woods. And I could tell that Jaehyun seemed apprehensive about the candles.

And my hunch was proven right when Jaehyun asked, worry evident in his face, “Aren’t those a fire hazard?”

“It isn’t our first rodeo, Jung,” I replied and pulled him towards a tent in the far end, slightly away from the crowd. “This is yours.”

He looked surprise. “Mine?”

“Yes, your very own place to sleep. I did say that this was an overnight thing,” I said. “Figured you might want to be away from the crowd a little so you can focus on your writing.”

Jaehyun lowered his head as he entered his tent. He nodded in approval with a small hum before flopping onto the bed that was provided to him.

“Well, take some time to freshen yourself up,” I told him. “We might be in the middle of a forest, but we’re still on private grounds. If you need to make a call, there is reception.”

Jaehyun seemed relieved by my statement. “Thanks.”

I gave him a wink. “We might be a secret society, but it’s not like we’re inhumane.”

But he shook his head and smiled up at me. “No, I mean it. Thanks… for everything.”

The bright smile took me by surprise. I tried not to show it on my face or in my actions and nodded in acknowledgement. I then cleared my throat as I gave him the lantern and I motioned back with my thumb. “I still have a few things to take care of, but, festivities start in half an hour. You can do whatever you want in the meantime.”

He nodded and saluted me before falling on his back on the bed. “See you later!”

Jaehyun wasn’t certain of what he initially expected. Although he had a feeling that Cerca Trova was not a club quite like the others, he didn’t expect the scale to be this different. A part of him did expect some kegs and loud EDM music blasting through speakers and sleeping bags. But he would have never thought that their festivities would be so elaborate and themed.

“In short, that’s why I can’t make it to our date this evening,” Jaehyun said to his phone as he left a voicemail. “But, I can’t wait to come back and write and tell you everything about it. Anyway, I’ll talk to you soon. Bye.”

He was taken aback when he saw people sauntering in safari-themed clothing with wine in their hands as he left his tent. But he quickly got over his surprise and began walking around with his notepad and pen, ready to write down everything he was going to witness this evening.

He began roaming around, trying to see if he recognized a few familiar faces other than the ones he had been introduced to earlier. Jaehyun quickly gave up on that and decided to interview other members.

“Hey, guys,” he said as he walked up to a small group of four males having a conversation with either a drink in their hands, or a pipe. “Mind if I ask a few questions?”

“My, my, do stop,” one of them said in response with a look of disbelief.

“Excuse me?” Jaehyun reiterated.

“Catch on quick, why would you?” another continued. “That would prompt our congratulations and our will to sustain a discussion with you.”

Jaehyun frowned at their unusual choice of words and phrasing. “Are you guys playing a game?”

“At which you totally fail.”

He took a deep breath. “Okay, and how exactly do you play this game?”

“Try to call to mind how our group chat from its start,” another joined, “and possibly you might catch on.”

Jaehyun took the stranger’s advice into consideration and recalled the way they have been speaking ever since he entered their little circle. His mouth made an ‘o’ shape upon the realization and immediately jotted down the event. Although he wasn’t sure whether that would be relevant for the final article, but it wouldn’t hurt to keep note.

“So, you guys are not using the letter ‘e’?” he asked, just to confirm.

“And this journalist fails to follow our instructions.”

Jaehyun thought it was too much of a hassle to go along with their little game. As much of a wordsmith he was, to talk with words that did not contain the letter ‘e’ would simply deplete him of the energy he needed to last through the night.

“Right...” he declared. “I’m just going to go and speak to the others. You boys have fun.”

But somehow, after those four, no other person was willing to agree to Jaehyun’s interview. He wandered around the area like a lost puppy, but was delighted to find Johnny at the buffet table with an empty glass of wine.

“Johnny!” he exclaimed as he approached him.

“Hey!” his friend replied with a lazy smile.

Jaehyun was happy to see that Johnny wasn’t mad or grumpy with him anymore, and that he was back to his normal self. Though, he wasn’t sure if that was due to the alcohol that was swimming in the taller male’s system. But Jaehyun wasn’t going to complain.

“Sparkling, red or white?” Johnny offered.

“Um, maybe later,” Jaehyun responded and lifted his little notebook.

“Oh, right!”

“So, like, is there a reason why people are not speaking to me?” Jaehyun inquired.

“I’m speaking to you, right now, aren’t I?”

“No!” Jaehyun retorted stubbornly. “I meant like, the others.”

“Well, Jaehyun, you can’t possibly think that everyone was okay with you being here,” Johnny admitted as he took a flute of champagne and took a small sip. “Our President has to make a compromise, somehow.”

“Right, the club’s President!” Jaehyun gasped. “So, she’s the head of the group, right? Are there any other people who have a certain power?”

Johnny remained silent, unwilling to budge.

“Oh, come on, man,” Jaehyun whined. “I’m already here.”

His friend gave him a hard look and sighed in compliance. “Fine,” Johnny mumbled and signaled him to follow him with a wag of his finger.

Jaehyun was then brought in a little circle of five people that included Johnny.

“Jaehyun, meet the rest of the club execs,” Johnny said with a small pat on his shoulder and pointed at the two members he had already met with the hand that held his champagne flute. “Jae, you’ve already met Hendery and Seulgi—they’re the Treasurer and the Events Chair respectively.”

Johnny pointed to a male with a small scar on his brow but that didn’t prevent him from looking like he just jumped out of The Kanon, especially with his face’s perfect proportions and looks. “This is Taeyong, our leader’s right hand and second-in-command. So, our Vice-President.”

Taeyong, who looked the fiercest amongst them, ended up being the complete opposite, surprising Jaehyun in the most delighted way. He stuck out his hand for Jaehyun to shake and smiled at him politely. “I hope you’re enjoying your evening so far. We tried our best to make your stay as comfortable as possible.”

“Y-yes,” Jaehyun stuttered out, slightly intimidated by the other male’s charisma. “Thank you.”

“And here, you have Sicheng who is our Communications Chair,” Johnny motioned the last remaining member and Jaehyun nodded at him, just a tad unnerved from the way he stared at him. “So, there you go. You met all the people you needed to meet.”

Without waiting for his comment, they started speaking amongst themselves. This time, with the use of ‘e’s, thankfully. But, he wasn’t completely satisfied with the information he had just received. It then led him to blurt out their club President’s name, rendering the executive members completely silent.

“S-she’s–, um, she’s the President, right?” Jaehyun faltered but still gave himself a mental pat on the back for not retreating from the executives’ murderous glares. “So, how does it work, internally? Do you guys hold elections within the club? Or is it by seniority?”

They remained silent. Jaehyun wondered whether he had unintentionally stepped onto a landmine. He chuckled breathlessly and pointed a finger in a random direction. “Um, I’m going to go and find somewhere to write all of this down.”

He quickly walked away, unable to sustain the heavy tension that followed right after he said the girl’s name. And he wondered; was the shift in the atmosphere due to his mention of that name, or was it due to his presence being here?

“There you are!”

And speak of the devil.

“I was wondering where you ran off,” she said with a small giggle as she took a seat on the log next to him. “Almost thought a bear dragged you away.”

His eyes widened the slightest at the mention of the animal.

“Joking. I told you that we’re completely safe here, didn’t I?” she snickered.

The girl was wearing a simple summer dress with a straw hat. He pointed it out with a small crinkle of his eyes. “Cute hat.”

“Why, thank you,” she said as her hands went up to it before asking, “So, what are you doing here?”

Jaehyun exhaled. “Just needed a space to collect my thoughts.” He then bobbed one of his shoulders. “Not that everyone has given me enough information to do so.”

“Yeah,” she faked a wince, “sorry about that. I had to twist their arms in order to get them to even agree into letting you come in the first place.”

Jaehyun waved it aside before turning himself to face the girl with his notepad. “Okay, but you can cooperate, right?”

The girl rolled her eyes and motioned him to go ahead with her chin. “Give me your best shot.” But then held up a hand as he was about to open his mouth. “But first, the conditions of you being here.”

“Oh, right,” Jaehyun responded disappointedly. He was hoping that she had forgot.

“First, no pictures,” she said as she grabbed the camera that Jaehyun had hidden in his jacket’s pocket.

“Awn, come on!”

“Don’t worry, you’ll get it back at the end of the getaway,” she said with a small coo. “Second, no names.”

“It’s not like I was being introduced to everyone,” he mumbled under his breath.

“Well, you know the club’s execs and that’s already too many people,” she said. “Third, no physical descriptions of any of us. There are some authority figures up and down the city of Seoul trying to nab us for things that we have may or may have not done in the past.”

“Fine, I’ll keep you guys anonymous,” Jaehyun conceded. If she was the only person who could provide him some information, not to mention she was the one who did bring him here, he figured that this was the least he could do.

“Fourth, no identification of our location.”

“I don’t even know where we are!”

She snickered and proceeded while ignoring his comment. “Fifth–”

“There’s more?”

“–the most important condition of all,” she emphasized. “You cannot interfere with the integrity of the event.”

“What event?” At this point, Jaehyun was even more eager to know everything. Here he thought that the camping trip was the event, but it turned out that there was more to this? He should have done his research better, he told himself. “And how can I interfere with the integrity of the event?”

She gave him a mysterious smile. “You’ll see.” She clapped her hands together. “So, you in or you out?”

He mumbled, “I’m in.”

“Perfect,” she mused. “Now, your questions—ask away.”

Jaehyun didn’t hesitate as the questions vomit came out of his mouth without giving the poor girl a break. “How do you pay for this? Are there dues, or do you chip in? Are there alumni sponsoring it? How do you guys organize these events? And, what is happening tomorrow? Is it just as big? Or bigger? You mentioned that people might be after you guys, do they know that you’re here? Park rangers? Landowners? Are we even still in Seoul?”

He stopped himself, realizing that his questions might have slightly overwhelmed the girl. He had the tendency to do what whenever he interviewed people for his articles.

“Sorry.”

The girl laughed. “It’s nothing to apologize for. You’re excited and you want to know more—I get that.”

She then hummed as she tried to recall his questions.

“Since it’s a secret society, we are technically not registered as one with the student council, so you’d understand why you need to keep us anonymous. There aren’t dues since membership is passed down—if you’re a legacy, you’re automatically in. If there aren’t enough funds, then the executives chip in. In exchange for the power we have over the club, we make up for it in the finance department.”

“Since membership is passed down through legacies, it’s practically the same as alumni sponsoring the event. And for what’s happening tomorrow, it’s a surprise. But I can assure you it’s very Cerca Trova-esque. We do this almost every year to start off our social calendar.”

She paused and turned to him with a raised brow. “What were the rest of the questions, again?”

“Uh,” Jaehyun stuttered as he snapped himself out of his trance.

Although she was simply answering his questions, he couldn’t help but be mesmerized by the girl and how she handled everything with such poise and charisma. No wonder she was the leader of this club.

“Whose land are we on…?”

“Ah, right,” she said as she snapped her fingers. “Every year, the event remains the same but the location changes. This year, we’re on Hendery’s family’s land—the Wongs, to answer your question—and yes, they do know that we’re here. But they just don’t know what we’re here for.” She then shrugged nonchalantly. “Not that our family ever cared for what we do in our lives.”

She slowly trailed off, her eyes distant. It was only in that specific moment that Jaehyun had a feeling he had a glimpse of who she really was as a person, and not this image she had been projecting to him since the beginning.

The girl abruptly turned her head and smiled. “So? What are your other questions?”

He quickly blinked his eyes and averted them to his notepad. “R-right, um, well, about the membership, you just said that you have to be a legacy to get in. How do you know if they’re not lying or something?”

She took a sip of her drink before answering, “Mhm, well, we do keep records of the club’s past and current members. The past generation is responsible for passing on the legacy. Our secret meetings, our secret club’s room—all of that is information that was supposed to be given by the previous generation, so that means our parents or our grandparents.”

Jaehyun quickly scribbled all of that down. “So, is it possible for someone to be a legacy but isn’t part of the club?”

“Yes, but they’re rare,” she responded. “Either because it’s not their thing, or their parents or grandparents have never told them anything about it.” She shrugged. “It’s not our responsibility to go after them, either.”

“What if they change their mind? Or if they were told of it at a later time?”

She gave him a devilish smile. “Well, who am I to deny them access? Though, I’d doubt that they would refuse to join if they were told about it.”

Jaehyun frowned, confused by her statement. “What do you mean?”

She narrowed her eyes playfully at him and made him hold up three fingers. “Swear that you won’t write about this?”

“Well, it depends–”

“Jaehyun,” she cut him off with a soft, pleading look. “Swear it, please.”

He nodded. “I swear.”

She finally let go of his hand and sighed as she took off her hat and played with it. “Cerca Trova isn’t as cool or mystical as everybody thinks it is. Yeah, sure, we do some crazy stuff all the time, but it’s really just a cry for attention.” She then asked, “Do you know what our club name means?”

“Yeah, Italian for seek and you shall find.”

“And what exactly do you think we’re seeking for? Rush of adrenaline? Trouble? Our parents’ love and approval?” She made a face. “Well, that took a dark turn.” She breathed out sharply. “You said you followed me back to the limousine on the night we bumped into each other. Do you recall the phrase I shouted out before entering the car?”

“Memento vivere,” he replied. “Latin for Remember to live.”

A side of her lips curled up. “Someone did their research.” But her expression quickly turned serious. “Cerca Trova is really just a bunch of misfits trying to find meaning in their life before our time is up. A club where we can let loose and do whatever we want before we’re shackled down by the destiny paved by our families.”

“But, you guys are all heirs and heiresses to major corporations,” Jaehyun stated matter-of-factly. “Why do you guys need somewhere else to do whatever you want when you have almost everything in the palm of your hands?”

She peered into his eyes. “Tell me, Jaehyun, what do you want to do after graduation? After turning into a full-fledged adult?”

The question took him by surprise. “Well, I want to become a journalist. Write meaningful articles. Travel the world.”

“And are you happy, right now?”

Jaehyun was slightly taken aback with her question that he was rendered speechless. But he found himself unable to answer it.

She laughed, but Jaehyun wasn’t able to detect a hint of humour in her laugh. “Did you know that no one has ever asked me those two questions? Not even Johnny or Taeyong or Seulgi or anyone in this club? Why do you think that?”

Jaehyun remained silent.

“Because, our life is already set in stone by our family elders. The schools we’ve been sent to, the classes we have to take, the people we become friends with—there is nothing about our life that is authentic.”

Someone shouted her name and she got up from the log before wearing her straw hat again.

“Cerca Trova is pretty much our safe haven. It’s a place that allows us—that dares us—to dream.”

“But your parents and your grandparents,” Jaehyun said. “Weren’t they also members?”

She hummed. “Yes, but they ran out of time—just like we will.”

Someone called for her once again. This time, Jaehyun recognized the voice as Johnny’s.

“Coming!” she shouted back and turned back to him with an expression he couldn’t decipher. “Sleep tight, Jaehyun. You’ll need it for tomorrow’s big event.”

Jaehyun told himself he should really stop being so awed by the things he had seen. And although the girl had warned him that there was going to be a big event happening the next day, he didn’t expect an event of this scale.

It first started the morning of, when Jaehyun woke up to an empty and silent camp site. He panicked just the slightest until he noticed the girl waiting for him on a bench near his tent. She was about to greet him when her expression turned sour as she looked him up-and-down.

“What’s with the ball gown?” he asked.

“I should ask you the same question,” she replied with a look. “You can’t attend the event wearing your civilian clothes.”

“But, I didn’t know that I was supposed to bring a tux!” Jaehyun argued. “Heck, I didn’t even know that it was an overnight thing!”

“You promised that you will not interfere with the integrity of our event!” she countered back and then pointed at his outfit that consisted of a simple black tee-shirt and a pair of black jeans. “Your clothing will interfere with the integrity of the event.”

“I literally do not have any other clothes on me at the moment.”

“Did you even check out your tent properly?” she asked exasperatedly.

Jaehyun raised a questioning brow before heading back inside his tent. This time, he made sure to look around properly. The only spot he hadn’t looked before was under his bed. And just like that, he managed to find a huge white box with a red bow on it. And the box revealed a whole ensemble, completed with a pair of leather shoes and bowtie.

A few minutes later, he finally came out of his tent, wearing the outfit that had been specially prepared for him.

The girl grinned, satisfied with the results. “Well, don’t you look dashing.”

“Thanks,” he mumbled, a bit shy since he wasn’t used to both compliments and wearing a tuxedo. “You too.”

His eyes then widened when he realized what he had just said and his eyes immediately reddened. “No! That’s not what I mean! I mean, yes! No! I mean–” He took a deep breath. “You look beautiful.”

She giggled and gave him a small curtsy. “Why, thank you.” She then pulled his arm as they ran towards a path that led them to an open field. “Now, come on! We’re going to be late!”

At their arrival, Jaehyun could already tell that they were the last ones to arrive. The girl kept rushing him while he was trying to take in all the details. She pulled him to the front of the group gathering—Jaehyun estimated the club compromised of approximately 40 members including the executives—before handing him a flute of champagne.

Jaehyun took the flute distractedly as he listened to Taeyong, who was speaking in the front.

“–and I do declare here gathered, the 108th grand assembly of the honourable Cerca Trova society,” the Vice-President announced. “Please raise your glasses.”

Jaehyun did as asked and looked around in panic, wondering whether he was doing this correctly or not.

“Memento vivere!”

The rest of the group repeated the same words whereas Jaehyun mumbled the words belatedly. The girl raised the glass of champagne to his lips and quietly motioned him to do the same to her. After taking a sip, she took a step back and then said to him, “Cover your ears.”

“H-huh, why?”

The loud sound of a trumpet was blown, similar to a fanfare, causing everyone to shout in delight before running towards the middle of the field.

“That’s why,” she said with a small wink before joining the others who seemed to have begun a small game of croquet. Only with a small twist. The girls were to sit in a palanquin and hit the wooden balls with the mallet through the wicket whereas the boys were the ones carrying the litters.

Jaehyun decided to check out the large venue. Buffet tables with fruits and finger foods and alcohol set under large white tents lined the sides of the field. Gramophones played out playful medieval music. Another activity on the sidelines caught Jaehyun’s attention, where the rest of the executive members were.

“Oh, hi, Jaehyun,” Seulgi greeted him.

“Hi,” he replied and raised a brow. “So, what’s going on?”

He then heard Taeyong shout, “Pull!”

At his word, Johnny jumped from a trampoline and Taeyong used a paint gun to shoot at his friend. The latter then landed on a huge air mattress. “Ooh, nice shot, TY,” Johnny exclaimed from the mattress with a fist up in the air.

“Is this safe?” Jaehyun asked, to which all of them simultaneously replied with a single nonchalant, “No.”

“Pull! Pull! Pull!” Hendery shouted in glee without a break. He grumbled something to himself and handed the gun over to Jaehyun. “All right, I’m bored. I want to be a target.”

“You’re always a target, Hendery,” Seulgi mumbled as Hendery headed over to the trampoline, and then turned to Jaehyun, startling the latter. “Do me a favour? Hit him in the face.”

Jaehyun nodded slowly, wondering if she was being serious or not, and took position as he waited for Hendery to set himself in place. He brought up the paint gun to his line of vision and asked the remaining members, “So, is this the big stunt?

“The big stunt?” Sicheng repeated and crossed his arms in amusement. “Does it look like it?”

“I’m guessing no,” Jaehyun mumbled under his breath.

“You have to say pull, sweetie,” Seulgi advised him. “We don’t have all day.”

“O-oh, uh, pull!” Jaehyun shouted and Hendery jumped off on his mark. He quickly pulled the trigger and out of nervousness, he didn’t even know whether the paint had hit Hendery or not. Jaehyun secretly hoped that it didn’t. He didn’t want to be the reason why Hendery had to be sent to a hospital.

“Well, you just answered your own question,” Sicheng replied.

“Don’t worry, Jaehyun,” Johnny said and patted him on the shoulder. “You’ll know it when you see it.”

Jaehyun’s eyes practically bulged out when he saw Hendery being carried away in a stretcher by other members of the club. “W-wait, what happened?”

“I missed the mat,” Hendery groaned.

“Again?” Seulgi snickered. “Why am I not surprised?”

“Oh, guys, come on, it’s time for the big finale,” Taeyong announced and threw the paint gun onto the mat. Jaehyun quickly mirrored his action. “Let’s head out to the venue.”

“Th-there’s a venue?”

Jaehyun quickly followed the group and saw a tall contraption that must be at least around 30 meters high with a platform with people already standing on it.

“Guess who’s the genius behind all this?” Johnny mused as he pointed at Cerca Trova’s President with his chin as the latter approached them with a skip in her steps.

“Are you guys ready?” she practically squealed.

“Ready?” Jaehyun chuckled nervously. “Ready for what?”

“Well, what do you think we’re going to do?” Taeyong asked.

“You guys are not going to jump, are you?” Jaehyun replied with another question, appalled.

“Going to jump, yes!” Johnny exclaimed with his fists pumped up.

Jaehyun pointed at the tall structure. “That’s almost 7 stories tall! They’re going to die!”

The girl gasped dramatically. “Oi, that’s my masterpiece you’re talking about here. No one will die. No one in the history of Cerca Trova has ever died.”

“That’s also because past members used to jump from a low bridge into a small pond,” Seulgi whispered to him with a small giggle.

Taeyong, Johnny, Seulgi, and Sicheng quickly left and started heading up to the platform.

“And besides, we’re all going to die, one day,” the girl then said as she observed her four friends going up.

“B-but, those four are today.”

She smiled at him mischievously. “Six.”

Jaehyun counted the heads again: Taeyong, Johnny, Seulgi, and Sicheng.

Four.

“But, I see four.”

“I’m heading up,” the girl stated.

“Of course, you are.” Jaehyun never wanted to smack himself in the face so badly.

She rolled her eyes. “Anyway, Hendery was supposed to do it. It’s tradition for the six executives to jump to symbolize the start of a new school year. But Hendery, being Hendery, can’t make it anymore so there’s an extra space.”

Jaehyun hummed as he stared up at the four other members who had umbrellas in their hands. They were basically replicating the picture he had seen of Johnny’s grandfather during his time in the club.

When he didn’t hear the girl say anything else, he slowly came to the conclusion. “Oh, no, no, no, no.”

“Hey, have a little bit of faith in me, would you?” She pouted. “It’s very safe. Me and my team did dozen successful test drops and every potato came through without a single scratch.”

“A potato?” Jaehyun deadpanned, clearly unimpressed.

“Well, you can’t test using people,” she replied, baffled, “that’d be dangerous.”

“Jumpers to their place!” Hendery shouted from a wheelchair, disappointment evident in his demeanour.

“Come on!” The girl pulled him along. “It’ll be a nice thing to write about for your article. All great journalists are active participants, not just observers.”

And Jaehyun allowed himself to be pulled away. If anything, that was the only way to get him up there. “We’ve only met like, how many times already? How do you know me so well that you’d use my journalistic ambitions against me?”

“Well, I’ve been observing you—looking at you.” She then turned around with an alarmed look. “It sounded better in my head, trust me. But, I’m not a creep or anything.”

“No, just a daredevil,” he mumbled as he continued to stare at her contraption. “But why have you been looking at me? To use your words?”

She scoffed as they started climbing up the ladder that would eventually lead them to the top. “You mean,” she grunted, “you seriously don’t know why? I thought I made it obvious?”

“Obvious?” Jaehyun repeated. “Made what obvious?”

At the top, she handed him a black umbrella and helped him fasten a belt with a rope tied to it. “Don’t worry, it’s basically the same concept as bungee jumping. Only it’s going to help slow down your speed as you descend along with the umbrella.”

Jaehyun peered over and shuddered. “Uh, why do they look so worried?”

“We’re low on alcohol, probably,” she stated offhandedly as she fastened her own belt and opened up her umbrella. “Regarding your question—why do you think I fought so hard against my friends to let you participate in Cerca Trova’s most important event of its social calendar?”

“Uh, I don’t know? Because you took pity on a poor university journalist on a tight deadline?”

She snorted. “That, but also because I like you.”

“Wait, what?”

She grabbed his hand and smiled before jumping off the platform without a single warning. Jaehyun’s heart practically jumped out from his chest as adrenaline rushed through his veins during the descent. The members waiting at the bottom of the metal structure cheered as they safely landed on the ground.

Jaehyun chuckled breathlessly as he made sure that he was still alive. And he felt alive more than ever. He automatically turned to the girl who held his hand during the whole experience and faltered when he saw that she was already looking at him with a small, almost shy, smile.

“I like you.”

The following weeks passed by like a blur for Jaehyun. In-between writing his article, driving back-and-forth from university to his home to visit his girlfriend, and keeping up with his classes and assignments, he barely had the time to think about the confession he had received from a certain girl. Not to mention, he hadn’t properly thanked her for helping him with the article now that it was finally published.

“Hey, Mum,” he said to his phone as he walking to his Visual Anthropology class. “What’s up? I’m heading to class now, so please make it quick.”

“Hi, honey,” she replied back. “Did you give a reply back to your grandfather about that summer internship he had found for you?”

He sighed, not wanting to go through this conversation again. “Mum, I already told you that I was going to travel with Naeun this summer.”

“I know, I know,” she said. “But it’s a huge opportunity and I feel like you haven’t given it much thought because you already have these plans. Your grandfather just called me earlier and he sounded so excited and proud about the prospect of you working at that internship.” His mother then sighed. “Just promise me you’ll think about it, okay?”

“Fine, I promise.”

“Oh, and, your grandparents want to host a party to mark your debut into society, the Saturday in two weeks,” she continued. “So, instead of our weekly dinners, it will be a soirée. Make sure to come earlier than usual. I think your grandmother ordered some custom suits just for you.”

Jaehyun tried not to sound irritated. “Mum, isn’t this a bit too much? I mean, just a couple of months ago, you guys were barely speaking to each other, and now, you’re organizing events together and–”

“Honey, I know the argument that I had with your grandparents a while back affected our relationship with them,” she spoke softly. “But, they had done so much for us. Helping us out when your father left, paying for your university’s tuition, and so much more. And I know how much Grandpa means to you and how proud you always wanted to make him. And I figured that I cannot take that away from you. The bad blood between me and your grandparents shouldn’t affect your relationship with them, at all.”

His mother didn’t lie. His grandparents were at first against the marriage between his mother and father, not to mention he was born out of wedlock. They were so against it that they had a falling out and hadn’t spoken to each other for the first ten years of his life. They had a bad feeling about his father and they were proven right when Jaehyun’s father left him when he was ten years old. Ever since then, his grandparents had helped him and his mother out, and Jaehyun grew to look up to his grandfather.

Jaehyun wasn’t certain why his mother and his grandparents had another falling out a few years ago, when he turned eighteen, but that did make his relationship with the elders a tad more complicated and awkward than it used to be. It was only recently, a couple of months ago, that they had finally made up. And Jaehyun was more than happy to be on speaking terms with his grandparents again.

“I know,” he said.

“And besides,” his mother continued, “you were supposed to have this party when you turned eighteen, but you weren’t able to. And now that your grandparents and I are speaking to each other again, they got a little bit excited and decided to use this opportunity to invite their old friends from SNU, as well. It’ll be a good opportunity for you to socialize and make connections.”

“Yeah, Mum, it’s not really my thing.” Jaehyun winced at the news. “I know I said I agreed to them having a party for that or whatever, but it sounds like they’re making this bigger than it should be.”

“Oh, honey, I know,” she said, sympathizing with him. “But do this for your grandpa, yeah? And if you want, you can bring Naeun with you.”

He was slightly taken aback at the idea of bringing his girlfriend to meet his grandparents, but quickly brushed it off as he chuckled. “Yeah, that’d be nice. She never met them before.”

“See? Silver lining. Invite your friends from the newspaper! I’m sure that your grandfather would love to meet them.” She sounded so satisfied. “Anyway, you’ve got class, right? I’ll let you go now. Love you.”

“Love you too.”

He quickly dialed his girlfriend’s number and she picked up at the first ring.

“Hey, stranger.”

“Hey,” he replied back. “So, Saturday in two weeks—got any plans?”

“Why? Are you asking me out on a date?” he heard her giggle.

“Not exactly,” he said. “My grandparents are hosting this soirée or party or whatever that Saturday, and I am forced to attend it. Would you please be an angel and keep me company? I also want to introduce you to them, as well! Especially to my grandfather.”

“The grandparents that helped your mum raise you? And meet the grandfather that you look up to? Sounds good,” Naeun agreed easily. “Pick me up at six?”

He groaned. “Actually, I can’t pick you up because my grandmother probably wants me there early for suit fitting and what-not—forgive me?”

“Well, you’ll be in a suit and all, so I think you’re already forgiven.”

“You’re the best,” he said. “Oh, and by the way, did you finally take a look at my story?”

“Uhh, what story?”

Jaehyun’s heart dropped a little when he heard the hesitation in her voice. “The one I’ve written about the secret society at SNU?”

His girlfriend stammered a little. “O-oh, yeah, I did. Your writing is as impeccable as always. You know that I like everything that you write.”

“Really?” he exclaimed. “What was your favourite part?”

“Oh, you know, like the whole thing was just really well-written,” she mumbled vaguely. “Anyway, I have to head to work now. Call me later?”

He didn’t think too much about her reply and hummed. “You know it.”

He pocketed his phone and was about to enter the auditorium, where his Visual Anthropology class was held. He immediately noticed the President of the secret society he had been after for a year, standing next to the door, a cup of coffee in one hand and a copy of The Daily SNU in the other.

He froze in his tracks, not knowing what to do in this situation.

The girl smiled brightly when she noticed him and walked up to him. “Hey,” she greeted him and raised the newspaper. “Read your article.”

“Y-you did?” He wanted to hit himself in the face. “I– I mean, hey.”

“Hello,” she said with a smile and then nodded approvingly. “And yeah, got to say, Jaehyun, you really are meant to be a journalist. You caught the spirit of the thing—I’ll give you that.”

“But?” he asked unsurely.

She laughed. “Not but’s! Your writing style is really good. You used too many metaphors for my taste, but it also reminded me a little bit of Joseph Mitchell’s writing.”

Jaehyun stammered out his next few words, still in shock that she would come up to him, especially since he didn’t properly acknowledge her confession and walked away from her awkwardly. “W-well, I got to admit, I’m surprised you even bothered to read it.”

“Excuse you? I am an avid reader of The Daily SNU, mind you,” she retorted jokingly. “And how can I not read it? Especially when it’s about the club that I’m part of. But I can assure you this, everyone in Cerca Trova is raving about it.”

“Really?”

“Yup,” she reassured him, “like I said, you really caught the essence of our society and the members really appreciated that. I also appreciate the fact that you kept some of the stuff a secret, like I have kindly asked you to.”

“W-well, thank you,” Jaehyun said with a relieved smile. Not only did the subject of his article loved it, but she also appreciated his writing. Those were the biggest compliments he could have gotten as a journalist. Not to mention the fact that she recognized one of his favourite writers’ style in his own.

“And, I also wanted to talk to you, you know, about the whole I-like-you thing.”

The girl stated it so bluntly that he could feel his ears growing hot. He only hoped that they weren’t so red that she would take notice of them.

She sighed. “I want to apologize for putting you in that spot. But I’m not saying that I regret it. On the contrary, I do like you. I find you really charming and interesting as I got to know you. But, we’ve only known each other for a short while and honestly? Not everyone can handle me and my personality. I think that’s what hit me the most. And because it’s not everyone who like me for who I am, I’m really grateful for the fact that you didn’t run away because of that, but more like because my abrupt confession took you by surprise.”

“Yes!” he exclaimed suddenly, startling the girl. “I mean, yes, thank you for not misunderstanding my actions and the reason why I walked away from you. It’s not because I don’t like you or anything. I mean, I do like you, but I don’t, in that–”

She started laughing at his stammering mess. “It’s okay, Jaehyun. You don’t need to explain yourself. I understand. I mean, all that just to say that I hope we can still be close, you know, even after your article is done and you don’t need me anymore.”

“Yes!” he exclaimed once again and cleared his throat as he regained his composure. “Uh, yes, I agree. I’m glad that you came up to me.”

She hit him on the chest lightly with the newspaper with a smile. “Glad we’re on the same page.”

“Well, how about this,” he said, “my grandparents are having this party Saturday, in two weeks. Why don’t you and Johnny and the other club members come?”

“Ooh, in two weeks, huh?”

Jaehyun nodded.

“I can’t,” she said with a small pout.

For some reason, Jaehyun thought she looked really adorable at that moment.

“The club members and I already have this event to attend. It was pretty last minute too—just heard about it today from my parents earlier on.” She blew a raspberry. “You just missed me by a few minutes—that sucks. I would have loved to keep you company, but I already promised my parents that I’d attend it this one.”

“That does suck.” He sighed disappointedly. “Well, we can’t do anything about that.”

“What about your friends at the paper? Can they not come?”

“I haven’t invited them yet,” he replied. “But I’m sure they’ll agree.”

“That’s good,” she said. “Oh, and speaking of your friends at the paper. Your friend, Doyoung? He doesn’t suspect anything, right?”

“Pretty sure he forgot about it,” he said while shaking his head. “And hey, you’re presenting today, right? How are you feeling?”

She rolled her eyes with a dramatic groan as if she was in pain. “Never liked presenting in front of people. I’m dreading it, to be honest. I was about to drop the class when I found out about it, but my guidance counsellor talked me out of it.”

“I’m sure you’ll do fine,” Jaehyun reassured her, though he understood her pain.

And she did fine.

More than fine.

“–Edward Said unravels and exposes problematic representations in all social sciences, and that actually brings many critiques in anthropology, especially because of the visual component of capturing the other, capturing the soul of the other, questions about consent and ethics, and etc.”

“Uh, dude, you’re staring,” Jungwoo mumbled to him.

Jaehyun immediately snapped out of his daze and gave his friend a look. “She’s giving a presentation. Where else am I supposed to look, then?”

“Uh, people don’t look at her like you do,” Jungwoo replied with a weird look.

He almost wanted to roll his eyes. “How exactly do I look at her, pray tell?”

“Like you adore her or something,” his friend answered without hesitation. “Like she’s the most fascinating person in the whole entire world. Like she’s a book that you are dying to read. Like–”

“Okay, I get it,” Jaehyun said to shush him up as people were starting to give them looks for being a tad too loud. “And I don’t look at her that way. What are you talking about?”

“Sure, keep telling yourself that.”

“Alright, anyone else got any questions?” the professor asked.

Jaehyun tried not to glare at his friend for distracting him from the girl’s presentation and from the other students’ questions. Although he usually dreaded listening to oral presentations, she had brought in a new angle for the topic which was more than interesting for Jaehyun. She seemed so full of knowledge that he found himself wanting to know more.

That he found himself raising his hand.

“Yes, Jaehyun, go ahead.”

He could tell that the girl raised a brow in amusement, probably wondering what kind of question he had for her. Jaehyun rarely asked questions, only because he knew just how much the students hated being put on the spot. But the girl, contrary to what she had stated prior to her presentation, was eager to answer questions—ready to challenge whomever.

“Well, I was wondering, if epistemology is the study of knowledge production about a topic and methodology is the method or the tool of exploring a topic, according to you, where is the visual in visual anthropology in this spectrum? In your opinion, is the visual understood as a tool of knowing or as a site of knowing?”

“Excellent question, Mr. Jung,” the professor remarked with delight.

The girl seemed to feel the same about his question. “Well, in my opinion, thick description relates more to the writing part of anthropology as it refers to making descriptions of cultural acts to be clear or adequately describe for people who are not present while it happens,” she easily answered, “whereas, the camera serves as a way of illustrating exactly what is happening because it is being filmed, although it might require some description of what is actually occurring. The camera allows all viewers to interpret their own ideas of what is happening and doesn’t require much of the anthropologist’s interpretation or thick description.”

“So, film and still image can perhaps be known or impart some knowledge through the interpretation of cultural cyphers?” Jaehyun added, though it came out more like a question even though it was meant to be as a statement.

“Yes, exactly. It’s all about the framework,” she replied without hesitation. “I believe that there is no real objective view of culture or ethnography because we all have inherent biases that stem from the cultures we are raised in. Even as a tool of signifier, we have our own individual interpretations of our material world.”

“And an excellent answer to an excellent question,” the professor complimented. “I hope you guys will ask questions of the same calibre as Jaehyun’s for the next presenter. This is university, people, not high school. Class dismissed.”

“What the hell were you two even talking about?” Jungwoo asked with a small groan. “You’re giving me a headache with all this talk about thick descriptions and films and whatever jargon you guys were using.”

Jaehyun chuckled at his friend as he packed up his stuff. “Jungwoo, this is material that we learned like a month ago.”

“You know I’m only taking this class as an elective because of you, right?” Jungwoo said with a deadpanned expression. “I thought you said this was an easy class!”

“It is, though?” Jaehyun remarked with confusion. Jungwoo was an Engineering student, that boy was practically a genius.

“You look glad, though,” Jungwoo commented with an expression similar to relief. “Weren’t you saying how you have yet to meet someone who can stimulate you intellectually or something?” He then threw a look over at the girl who was speaking with the professor.

“Looks like you’ve met your match.”

To make up for the fact that the gang and I couldn’t attend the party Jaehyun had invited us to, we thought that it would only be fair to invite him to another one of Cerca Trova’s outings. Surprisingly, none of the executive members were against my decision.

This time around, we had whisked him away for a long weekend outing in Jeju-do. At first, he was hesitant since he said he couldn’t afford the trip. But we all reassured him that the basic expenses were already provided for: Seulgi’s family jet was going to bring us there, Johnny was the one who provided the accommodations, and Taeyong was responsible for the land transportation.

We originally wanted to head over to Europe for a week, especially after midterms, but Jaehyun wasn’t too keen on the idea that he had to miss a whole week of school. A Friday was the most we could get out of him, but he wanted to be back by Monday morning, just in time for his afternoon classes.

“We were supposed to live at my place, but my parents are there, so,” I said to Jaehyun as we landed in Jeju International Airport. “Thankfully, Johnny was able to book us a suite for the seven of us.”

“Well, what’s the point of being the heir to a chain of hotels if I can’t do that much?” Johnny drawled as we descend from Seulgi’s jet.

“What about the other members?” Jaehyun asked. “The non-executive ones?”

I cocked a brow at him. “Is this for another one of your article?” He quickly shook his head with his eyes wide. “I’m kidding,” I said before shrugging at his question. “They’re somewhere on the island, I guess? Unless the activities that we do require us to, we usually stay within our own little group rather than gathering everyone up together.”

“It’s a weekend of relaxation,” Hendery added with a small snort. “We don’t really want to be stuck with each other for that long, you know?”

“And yet, I’m stuck with you,” Seulgi quipped with an exaggerated sigh.

“Can it, Kang,” Hendery hissed before retreating away next to Sicheng.

Jaehyun chuckled next to me as Taeyong led us to the cars he had prepared for us. “Are they always like this?”

“For as long as I can remember,” I answered. “So, have you thought about what you wanted to do in Jeju?”

He looked taken aback. “You mean, you guys haven’t planned any activities?”

I frowned. “Hey, the executives deserve a break, once in a while, you know? We can’t be planning activities left and right, and not have some time to ourselves and relax.”

“I guess I’ll tag along with you.”

His answer took me by surprise. “Um, are you sure?”

“Why wouldn’t I be sure?”

“Because not everyone share the same interests as I do,” I said and then motioned my friends who were walking in front of us. “Ask them.”

“It’s true,” Sicheng said. “Feel free to join us, if you’d like. We’re going hiking.”

I grimaced at that last word which caused Jaehyun to chuckle.

“Not a fan of physical activities?”

“Not a fan of sweating,” I replied with a fake wince. “They dragged me once to the top of Hallasan last summer, and God, did I want to throw them off from the top of the mountain.”

“But surely you must have been glad once you’ve reached the top?”

I gave him an ambiguous smile. “Who knows? They’re still here now, aren’t they?”

“Alright,” Taeyong said and turned to us as we got out of the airport. A line of black Audi R8 cars took over the parking near the sidewalk with employees from the Lee family standing next to the vehicles, a key on top of the red cushion they were holding. “How many cars do we need?”

“Well, no way am I going to be in the same car as Hendery, so I call dibs on a single car,” Seulgi said with her hand shot up in the air.

“Wow.” Hendery scoffed in disbelief. “I literally just breathed.”

“You’ll get over it, Wong.”

“Alright, let’s split the tasks, first, then,” I decided. “Johnny, Taeyong, you two head over to the hotel and get our rooms set up and make sure everything’s in place. Seulgi, Sicheng, and Hendery, you three take care of the food we need for the BBQ we’re having tonight. Jaehyun and I will take care of the cooking.”

“Sounds good to me,” Johnny said with an approving nod of his head.

“Other than that, do whatever you guys want to do. Relax, go for a drive, I don’t care. But be back at the hotel by 6:30 so that we can start setting up the stuff for the BBQ.”

Seulgi didn’t even wait for further directions before dashing off to the first car at the front and took the keys from the employee and got inside the car.

“Hendery, Sicheng, I suggest you two get a move on before you two lose Seulgi,” I said teasingly.

The two immediately ran off. Sicheng grabbed the keys while Hendery jumped in the passenger seat.

“Where are you two heading off?” Taeyong asked with crossed arms as he leaned against the car. “The museum?”

I shook my head. “Nah, somewhere else.” I then turned to Jaehyun. “You ready?”

With his confirmation, I caught the keys that Taeyong had thrown at me before entering the car. Jaehyun followed soon after. I marvelled at the interior of the car and let out a small “ooh”, causing Jaehyun to ask me what’s up.

“No need to put the key into the ignition,” I said as I motioned the small button that I got to push in order to start up the car. I immediately clicked it and I could practically feel my eyes sparkling at the marvel of the car.

Johnny knocked on Jaehyun’s side of the car and the latter immediately rolled down the window. He then motioned me with his chin and clucked his tongue at the male next to me. “Make sure to put on your seatbelt. The girl can get a bit wonky in the head once she has a sports car in her hands.”

“Funny,” I deadpanned and immediately drove off without any warning, with Jaehyun letting out a small yelp at the speed. I tried not to laugh as he tightened his hold around his belt a bit. “Relax,” I told him. “I’m really careful when I have someone with me in the car.”

“Right, um, I believe you,” Jaehyun stuttered out, his nervousness oozing out of him. But after a few minutes on the road, he seemed to have relaxed a little. I assumed the landscape outside must have helped. “So, where are we going?”

As I was about to answer, Jaehyun’s stomach growled and his ears immediately reddened. I laughed a little and took a look at the digital clock to see that it was already 1 in the afternoon. We didn’t exactly have lunch on Seulgi’s jet, either.

“Change of plans,” I said as I made an abrupt U-turn. “We’re going to eat.”

Around twenty minutes later, we arrived to the Dongmun Traditional Market. I automatically walked in and was at awe at the number of people who were in the market this early. But I guess it wasn’t as early as I thought. But, I was happy to be able to come here today. Coming in tomorrow or after-tomorrow during the weekend would have been horrible.

Jaehyun looked confused as he walked beside me. “You brought me to a market?”

“Where else did you expect me to bring you to?” I asked. “A high-end restaurant?”

“Well, I– I mean,” he stammered out, “can you blame me? With all your jets and private cars and private suites.”

I bobbed a side of my shoulders. “Yeah, I could have brought you to a high-end restaurant, but I was craving street food.” I glanced over at him and halted in my steps. “Well, it’s never too late. Do you want to go–”

“No!” he shouted and immediately lowered his voice when he noticed the attention that he attracted with his loud voice. “I mean, here is fine. We can eat street food.”

As soon as we entered the market, I made way for my favourite croquettes stand. I was pulled back abruptly and I gasped when I felt someone’s hand around my wrist. I immediately looked back with a threatening look to only soften when I realized that it was simply Jaehyun.

My eyes landed on his hand that was around my wrist and he instantly let go of it. He cleared his throat and didn’t dare to look me in the eyes as he mumbled, “You were walking too fast and I didn’t want to lose you in the crowd.”

I smiled a little at how cute and shy he was being and wrapped my hand around his without hesitation. He looked taken aback and I tried not to coo at how red his ears had gotten, though I was certain that my own cheeks were the same colour.

“There,” I then said as I walked towards the croquettes stand, “that should do it.”

“Ahjumma!” I immediately shouted out as her familiar face came into view.

“Look who’s back!” the older lady replied back gleefully and her eyes immediately fell into our intertwined hands but thankfully made no comment of it. “So, who is this?”

“This is Jaehyun,” I answered. “A friend of mine from university.”

“That’s weird, you usually never bring anyone with you,” she commented.

I chuckled awkwardly. “Well, I brought one today, haha…”

“Alright, I’m going to stop teasing you,” she said, making me breathe out a sigh of relief. “So, what can I get for you two, today?”

I perused the small menu hung at the top of the stall. “I think I’ll take 1 beef croquette and 1 shrimp croquette.” I turned to Jaehyun who was looking down at me. 

He seemed startled by my sudden movement and instantly switched his attention to the menu as he stuttered out, “Oh, um, I think I’ll take the same as you.”

I ignored his weird behaviour and passed it off that he was probably just out of it due to his hunger. “Okay, then. Ahjumma, we’ll take 2 beef and 2 shrimp! How much will that be?”

“It’ll be 10 000 won, dear.”

“Oh, I’ll pay,” Jaehyun said as his hand immediately shot up with a 10 000 won bill in his hand.

“Hey, I don’t mind,” I said and tried to ignore the feeling that was starting to wash over me as I felt how empty my hand was now that Jaehyun had let go of it. “I was the one who invited you here.”

“Yeah, but you guys basically paid for everything else, so please,” he said softly. “At least, let me pay for the food we’re going to eat at the market, today.”

I was slightly stunned with the expression he was sporting right now and was hit with the realization of just how handsome Jaehyun truly was. More so than ever. His beauty was something that I couldn’t describe properly but it reminded me of something fragile yet strong. Like how soft carved drapery looked like on a marble Kore statue.

“Uh, s-sure,” I managed to say when I realized that I was staring at his face for a tad too long.

His dimpled smile was his only reply.

While waiting for our food to be prepared, I tried to shake away the thoughts of him. My friends said that I was being too soft with a man who didn’t reciprocate my feelings and that perhaps I should let go of them – of this infatuation that I had with someone who was different. They all thought that he was just a mere distraction, but I knew.

I knew that he was more than that.

And when Jaehyun was the one who made the move to grab hold of my hand once again after our food was done and made way to the next stall I wanted to visit, I knew.

I just knew I had fallen hard for Jung Jaehyun.

The long weekend getaway passed in a flash. Jaehyun was starting to understand why the Cerca Trova members loved to get away so often. Anything that they did, it was enticing and entertaining—he truly understood the allure behind the secret society’s mystique and why people were so enamored with them.

Though, he couldn’t possibly admit to his friends back at the paper that he was spending time with the secret society members once again, especially since he was already done with the feature. And although Taeil insisted for a follow-up, he wasn’t too keen on asking the President of the club for another opportunity. And granted that he could write about the past weekend’s getaway, he didn’t want to betray their trust like that.

Especially not hers.

So, he told a little white lie to his friends and said that he was invited to Jeju island by Johnny and the gang, which wasn’t completely false. But his friends were more preoccupied by the fact that he was spending most of his time on the island with Johnny’s best friend.

Something that his friends had continuously teased him about it, especially Jungwoo.

Jaehyun found himself to be spending a lot more time with the girl than he’d like to admit. Not only was she incredibly intelligent and helpful in many ways, Jaehyun was reminded of Jungwoo’s words right after the girl’s presentation during their Visual Anthropology class.

“Looks like you’ve met your match.”

Everything that she said and did—it just reminded him of how brilliant she was.

Cunning and wicked and brilliant.

And God, was he attracted to her.

But he didn’t allow himself to cross that line with her. His heart did skip a few beat when she held his hand at the market, but he didn’t dare to make a move on her. And maybe she had sensed that he didn’t want to take that step, so she distanced herself a little.

He had a girlfriend back home, for goodness’s sake. And Jaehyun wasn’t the type to hurt his loved ones like that—never. So, he had no choice but to deny his own feelings whether he liked it or not. He tried to convince himself that it was simply infatuation, that he spent too much time away from home and his girlfriend.

But wow, was he completely enamored with her.

“Okay, but the tragedy of the commons theory comes into play because our population is growing exponentially and our resources’ growth rate isn’t going as fast as the population’s growth,” she argued as they discussed their small research assignment.

Jaehyun grouped with the girl and Doyoung, and they decided to research on how a society managed its own common pool property resources.

“Yeah, you’re right,” Doyoung agreed. “Common pool property resources are resources that are shared amongst the population and are considered as a non-excludable public good, meaning it is hard and practically impossible to restrict another citizen from them.”

“But that also means that they can be considered as rivalrous,” Jaehyun added, “because one’s individual use of the resources actually reduces the resources’ availability to other people.”

“Exactly,” she continued. “The excessive use of those resources may result in externalities that are negative such as pollution, extinction or even consequences that might harm bystanders. So, when a shared resource gets exploited–”

“It’s the tragedy of the commons,” Jaehyun mumbled, in awe.

“Bingo,” the girl said with a proud smile.

“Wow, I never looked at it that way,” Doyoung muttered as he furiously typed in the notes so that they could use them later for their paper. “It makes a complete circle.”

Jaehyun nodded, still slightly at awe by how easily she handled their research topic. “The theory leads to one conclusion—property rights are needed. But how can we prove that?”

The girl typed in something on her laptop before turning the screen towards them. On it was displayed another research paper. “We can analyze a major study. I’ve read this paper for another class and it’s a study on common pool resources in Malawi. If I remember correctly, there were many solutions that were brought to manage the resources.”

The students around them started getting up, signaling the end of class.

“I’ve got another class to go to now,” Doyoung announced as the trio started packing up. “Since it’s due next class, how are we supposed to do this?”

Both of the males looked at the girl expectantly without any hesitation. Jaehyun thought it was almost weird that they relied on the girl completely even though it was their first time working together. However, it would be stupid of both of them to ignore the leadership skills and intellect she had displayed to them today. Jaehyun thought that she was worthy of being called a leader—no wonder she was elected as her club’s President. And no wonder why her friends seemed so loyal to her.

She turned to Jaehyun. “Do you have class after this one?”

He shook his head.

“So, how about this? Since Doyoung, you have all the notes to everything related to what we have discussed about the tragedy of the commons theory, you can work on the introduction and the development.” The boy nodded. “And Jaehyun and I will work out the research paper on Malawi and write down possible solutions.”

“Sure, that’s fine with me,” Doyoung said nonchalantly, but Jaehyun could tell that his friend was delighted that he was left with the easiest tasks. He almost snorted with laughter at the obvious relief his friend was exuding. “Deadline?”

“How about four days from now?” the girl suggested. “That’ll give us enough time to go through everything to write up the conclusion together and leave us an extra day to proofread anything.”

“Awesome,” Doyoung exclaimed. “I’ll send it to you, then!”

With that said, the male quickly ran out from the room, leaving Jaehyun and the girl alone in the classroom.

He let out a deep breath and shook his head. “You’re way too lax with him. You know it’s okay to give him more work, right?”

She shrugged in response, she didn’t look too bothered with how she split the work amongst them. “Easier this way. And besides, he basically did that part with his notes, so why add more work to him?”

“If you say so.”

And a small study session on university campus turned into a long study session at Jaehyun’s favourite café he had found while looking for an old bookstore. It led to a trip to the museum for an exhibition on neo-Impressionist paintings, which then led to a talk on foreign films, and then a viewing on foreign film at an old local theatre.

That week’s showing was La vita è bella, which coincidentally happened to be one of the girl’s favourite movies.

“I cannot believe that you didn’t cry by the end!” Jaehyun shouted out of frustration as they exited the movie theatre. “You are heartless!”

The girl laughed, which frustrated Jaehyun because he was still in tears even though more than ten minutes had passed since the movie’s ending. “I’ve watched this movie dozens of times. I think I’ve cried enough.”

“Great.” He groaned as he rubbed his eyes. “Now, everyone’s going to look at me weirdly when we go back to the campus.”

“I didn’t think that you were someone who cared much about other people’s opinions,” she replied lightheartedly.

Jaehyun raised an amused brow at the girl and crossed his arms as they made their way back to their university campus, making small talk along the way. “And you believe that we’ve hung out enough times for you to form such opinion of me?”

The girl let out a small scoff mixed with a laugh. “I believe that we hung out together almost every day either after or in-between our classes. So much that Johnny and the others are actually starting to complain about my absences. And believe me, that doesn’t happen much since we practically grew up together.”

“So, is that a yes?”

She hummed in wonder. “Enough to understand who you are as a person.”

“Well, my, my, what a bold claim,” he said in a teasing tone. “Should I quiz you?”

The girl harrumphed jokingly. “You don’t believe me?”

He chuckled. He couldn’t believe just how much fun was he having just by conversing with her. He liked the fact that in one moment, she could sprout out the most random fact or sentence, and the other, completely blow his mind away with her deep knowledge about certain topics. He believed that she was truly a walking paradox, in some sort of way.

Just when he thought he had figured her out completely, she kept surprising him every day.

And Jaehyun couldn’t believe how much he enjoyed her presence in his life.

It almost seemed too good to be true.

“Jaehyun!”

Both of them turned around abruptly, Jaehyun’s eyes searching for the source. His eyes slightly widened at the sight of his girlfriend prancing towards him. Her smile practically reached her ears before it was slowly washed away at the sight of the girl walking next to him.

“Naeun,” he blurted out in shock and hugged the girl back. “W-what are you doing here?”

“Thought I’d surprise you and ask you to grab an early dinner with me,” she exclaimed with her arms around his torso. “So, are you surprised?”

“Uh, yeah!” he said with an awkward chuckle as his eyes darted furiously between Naeun and the girl standing next to them.

“So.” Naeun finally let him go and stood by him. “Who is this?”

Jaehyun quickly made the introductions. The girl who used to be next to him quickly plastered a professional smile and extended a hand for his girlfriend to shake. 

She gave Naeun her name and added a curt, polite, “It is so nice to finally meet Jaehyun’s girlfriend—I’ve heard much about you.”

“Well, that’s a shame,” his girlfriend replied with a tight smile, “because I have never heard about you.”

Jaehyun chuckled awkwardly as his brows furrowed at his girlfriend’s sudden animosity. “Naeun, I did talk to you about her. Remember the article I was talking to you about? She’s–” His eyes widened as he realized he was about to give out the girl’s secret.

Luckily, the latter caught it and quickly jumped in, “I’m Jaehyun’s classmate. We share a few classes together.”

His shoulders sagged slightly in relief.

She then gave him a quick glance and squirmed uncomfortably under Naeun’s gaze. “Well, um, I’ll leave you two be, then.”

“Wait, no–” Jaehyun suddenly said as he grabbed hold of the girl’s hand. Both of their eyes quickly went to his hand, and he quickly released her, embarrassment getting hold of him. He quickly returned next to Naeun’s side and cleared his throat awkwardly. “Join us for dinner.”

For the first time in a while, her expression crumbled and Jaehyun was able to see just how ill at ease she seemed at the idea of having dinner with him and his girlfriend. And for a second, he swore he saw a flash of uncertainty and frustration in her eyes.

“O-oh,” she stuttered. The girl never stuttered—she had always been smooth with her words. Never fumbling. Never discomposed. “I really shouldn’t. I’ll be imposing and–”

“Nonsense,” Jaehyun interrupted. “Think of it as thanks for the favour you have done for me.”

“No, really,” she insisted back. “I really don’t want to be third-wheeling you two.”

Jaehyun didn’t understand why he was so desperate for the girl to spend more time with him. Albeit, his girlfriend was with them too. But in any way, they were supposed to spend the rest of the afternoon together, discussing the foreign film they had just watched over dinner. Naeun’s presence was unexpected, but it didn’t mean that their plans should be cancelled. It was a compromise that he was willing to make.

“You won’t be,” Jaehyun said as his eyes wandered around campus anxiously, not knowing who or what was he exactly looking for until his eyes landed on a pair of males. His expression immediately brightened up as he shouted, “Johnny! Taeyong!” and then waved them over.

The two immediately jogged over and greeted their club leader first before greeting Jaehyun. Their expressions were bright until they landed on Naeun. It then switched over to a polite smile as the two introduced themselves to her.

“I’m Naeun,” she said with a smile that seemed different than the one she had offered to Jaehyun’s female friend. “I’m Jaehyun’s girlfriend.”

“Jaehyun’s… girlfriend…?” Johnny repeated slowly. Jaehyun didn’t miss the quick look Johnny had given to his own best friend, who seemed to be fidgeting on place. He then addressed her, “What are you doing with Jaehyun and his girlfriend?”

“I was about to leave,” she mumbled, refusing to meet any of their eyes. “Thought that I’d take this opportunity to go home early, for once.”

“You’re going back home?” Taeyong questioned. “I thought you were planning on staying on campus for one more night?”

She shook her head. “Now that I think about it, maybe it’s best if I go back early. We have that party tomorrow, remember?”

“Oh,” Naeun interjected. “Are you guys talking about Jaehyun’s party at his grandparents?”

“No,” she replied with another polite smile. “It’s just another obligatory party our parents are forcing us to attend, so unfortunately, we cannot attend Jaehyun’s.”

“That is… unfortunate.”

“Is it a matchmaking party, again?” Johnny commented nonchalantly. “I’m getting sick of those.”

“A matchmaking party?” Naeun repeated. “Those still exists?”

“Apparently, since we’re still forced to attend them,” Johnny replied with a tight, unimpressed expression.

“Who is it this time?” Taeyong inquired.

“Some guy named Yoon–” The girl then shut herself up and shook her head. “You know what, we should go–”

Jaehyun could feel the cold sweat trickling down his back at this indescribable tension lingering in the air.

“Johnny! Taeyong!” Jaehyun almost shrieked, startling the three members. “I was just saying how she should join me and Naeun for an early dinner but she wouldn’t budge because she said that she’d be third-wheeling. Mind joining us?”

Johnny breathed in sharply. “Ooh, sorry man. I get her. I wouldn’t want to interrupt a date, either.”

“But–”

“Your girlfriend,” Taeyong interrupted, effectively shutting Jaehyun up with his charismatic low voice, “isn’t a university student here, am I correct?” Taeyong smiled tightly when Jaehyun nodded in response to his question. “Given that her… presence was unexpected, perhaps you should take this time to show her around and spend a bit more time as a couple.”

“Yong’s right,” the other girl agreed. “Anyway, the three of us have to go home today to prepare for tomorrow.”

“We do?” Johnny muttered in wonder.

“Yes, since I’m going home early and Taeyong’s our ride. But if he’s giving me a ride today, then he’s not going to come back just so he could drive you back tomorrow.”

The taller male let out a sigh of resignation. “You’re right.” He then turned to Jaehyun and bid him and Naeun farewell with a wave of his hand. “Bye, guys. See you, Monday!”

His girlfriend bid them farewell and then turned to Jaehyun with a crestfallen expression, almost pouting even. He couldn’t help but compare the two girls, and quickly shook away the thoughts that came with it. Especially since he preferred thinking about a girl’s pouting lips that were not his girlfriend’s.

“Something wrong?” he asked as he caressed her cheeks.

“She–” Naeun licked her lips. “She’s just a classmate, right? Nothing more?”

Jaehyun’s eyes blinked at her question, a bit taken aback. Naeun decided to use to word classmate specifically, almost as if she wanted to test him.

“She’s not just a classmate,” Jaehyun revealed, and the hurt was evident in Naeun’s eyes. “She’s a really good friend of mine who helped me out on numerous occasions. I think to say that she’s just a classmate would be stretching the truth a little.”

She bit her lip and then sighed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to put it that way.”

Jaehyun relaxed a little at her words. “I know.”

“Well, I’m glad that she’s not coming,” his girlfriend said offhandedly without giving an explanation and then turned to him with a smile he used to love so much.

“So? How about that campus tour and early dinner?”

Jaehyun practically plopped onto the sofa. He was home for the weekend, at the request of his grandparents who wanted to throw a party for his university’s alumni. He texted his only female friend, apologizing for how their plans were suddenly interrupted. The latter had replied that it was fine, but that was it. She never usually was a dry texter, and it worried him that her replies had been so curt ever since then.

“Yoonoh-ah!”

He immediately stood up and smiled. “Grandpa!”

The old man gave him a tight hug and pulled back as the former looked him up-and-down approvingly. “Look how grown up you are! Your grandma certainly knows how to pick a suit.”

“That, she does.”

“So, tell me,” he said as they both sat down on the sofa, “what is new in your life? How are your studies at SNU?”

“Great, actually,” Jaehyun replied with a bit of glee.

He usually couldn’t talk about it with his mother since the latter never went to college and never really did understand his frustrations about school, but his grandfather was a SNU alumnus—he understood everything that was going on.

“I recently wrote this feature article for the paper, I think you’d love it.”

“I’d be glad to read it!” His grandfather did seem genuinely excited and he gave him a firm pat on his shoulder. “Did I ever thank you for doing this for me?”

Jaehyun softened. “You don’t have to, Grandpa. I’m happy to do this for you.”

The other male looked down awkwardly as if he hadn’t done this much before. “Still, thank you, Yoonoh. This party means a lot to me and I hope it will come to mean a lot to you. Use this opportunity to form connections. Think of it as a networking event, hm? Your mum did mention that you were slightly apprehensive about this party.”

A side of his lips curled up. He couldn’t lie to his grandfather. “Yeah, I still am, but like you said, I’ll just think of this as a networking opportunity.”

“Good,” the older man continued. “So, tell me more about your circle. You mentioned that you write for the university paper? Are the people on the paper your friends?”

“Yes, they’re actually brilliant writers, probably better than I am. I’ve actually invited them to this party,” Jaehyun revealed. “I hope that is fine with you.”

His grandfather chuckled deeply. “This is a party in your honour, Yoonoh. Invite whomever you want.”

“I also invited someone… important to me,” Jaehyun added hesitantly. He himself didn’t understand the hesitation but since he already invited Naeun, it was best to warn his grandfather in advance. “I’ll introduce you two later during the party.”

“Oh?” His grandfather’s eyes had glinted in some sort of delight. “I look forward to it.” He then cocked his head to the side, motioning the door. “Shall we?”

It wasn’t even half an hour in when Jaehyun’s head started getting dizzy with the number of names and people he had to remember for his grandfather’s sake as he didn’t want to embarrass the latter. He could see his mother socializing with her old friends from his peripheral and hoped that she would come over and save him from all of this.

His expression immediately brightened when he saw his friends from the paper making their way towards him. He almost had to hold a laugh in as it was his first time seeing his friends in such formal clothing. The usual would have been a normal tee-shirt and a pair of jeans, and sweatpants when the paper’s deadline was coming up.

“You guys cleaned yourselves up pretty good,” Jaehyun commented with a small snicker as he gave them each a handshake. He then made space for his grandfather on the side as he introduced each of his friends to the latter. “Grandpa, this is Taeil, the chief editor of our paper, Ten, Doyoung, and Jungwoo. They’ve been with me since the beginning. Not only are they brilliant writers, they’re also amazing students.”

“Is that so?” his grandfather mused and shook their hands. “Tell me boys, what are you majoring in?”

“Double major in Journalism and Literature,” said Taeil.

“Mechanical engineering,” Jungwoo answered.

“Visual arts.”

“Mathematics,” said Doyoung, last.

“And you boys are all in the same year?” They all nodded in affirmation. “That means you guys are eligible for internships, now, huh? I know a few people in multiple industries, let me know if you guys are in a bind.”

His friends’ jaw all dropped in shock. “Th-thank you for your consideration,” Taeil said in awe.

“Anything for Jaehyun’s friends,” his grandfather replied nonchalantly. “If you guys are even just a tenth of how brilliant Jaehyun described you to be, then I am not at all worried. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I think I just saw some of my own guests. Please enjoy the rest of your evening.”

They all bowed to the elder before they all started gushing in excitement.

“Okay, you didn’t tell us that your grandfather was the Jung Yoonhyun aka the most successful newspaper magnate in the whole country!” Jungwoo gushed.

Jaehyun rubbed the back his neck. “Sorry, my mum had a falling out with them a while back so it wasn’t until recently that I started talking to them again. And I also didn’t want you guys to see me in a different light, or something.”

“Never,” Taeil shot back. “And even then, we wouldn’t see you in a different light since you don’t act like those pompous students you started hanging out with.”

“Pompous students?” Jaehyun repeated, confused.

Ten rolled his eyes. “He means Johnny and the gang.” He then frowned and crossed his arms. “By the way, you never told us who was your insider. Was it Johnny?”

Jaehyun pretended to zip his mouth. “You guys know I never divulge my sources. Where are your ethics, people?” And then punched his friend softly on the arm. “And hey, Johnny and the others are really not that bad when you get to know them.”

“Forget it.” Doyoung snorted. “Taeil has a prejudice against privileged people.”

Jaehyun’s brows furrowed. “Wait, I’m a privileged person, now, no?”

“You don’t count.”

“Yeah, well, Johnny’s best friend, you know the girl he’s always with?” Doyoung continued. “She’s actually not that bad. She can a bit over the place sometimes, but when you grow up in an environment and lifestyle like hers, I’m not surprised that they’re all like that.”

Jungwoo agreed. “Yeah, Jaehyun and I share a class with her. She’s never done anything that made me want to dislike her or something.” He then elbowed Jaehyun knowingly. “And I see that you two are close as ever.”

“Okay, so it’s settled,” Ten said with a clap of his hands. “Johnny and his friends are actually nice people, and Taeil is just a jerk for disliking them for no apparent reason.”

“Hey!”

“Jaehyun!”

His girlfriend finally arrived and Jaehyun leaned down to give a peck on the top of her head. “Hey, you’re here.”

“Yes,” she said as she took a deep breath. “I almost couldn’t find you. Did I miss anything?”

“You just missed my grandfather,” Jaehyun said. “Oh, and you already met the guys except for Jungwoo. Jungwoo, this is Naeun, my girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend?” Jungwoo replied, clearly surprised. Jaehyun gave him a look and his friend immediately regained his composure. “Yes, girlfriend—who else? It’s nice to meet you, Naeun.”

“Likewise,” she said with another smile. It seemed like she hadn’t noticed Jungwoo’s little slip-up.

“Yoonoh-ah!” He heard his grandfather come with a few of his guests following right behind him. “Meet some of my friends and their grandchildren who happen to go to the same university as you.”

“Yoonoh?” Naeun mumbled in wonder. “Is that your real name?”

“Yeah, it’s a long story,” he replied. “Come, I’ll introduce you to him.” He then turned to his friends from the newspaper. “I’ll talk to you guys, later.”

He walked up to his grandfather. “Grandfather, meet Naeun,” he introduced the two. “Naeun, meet my grandpa.”

“It is nice to finally meet you, sir,” she said as she shook the elder’s hand. “I’ve heard much about you.”

“Ah, yes,” the latter replied vaguely. “The girlfriend with whom you’re planning on travelling instead of accepting the internship I got you this summer.”

His girlfriend turned to him with a curious gaze and Jaehyun looked away, unable to bear the weight behind her eyes.

“Tell me, Naeun, what are you studying in university?”

“Oh,” she said slightly taken aback with the sudden question. “I’m currently not attending university. I decided to take a year off to figure out what I want to do later in life.”

“I see.” He switched his attention back to Jaehyun. “Anyway, here they come. I guess they got caught up with other people.”

Jaehyun was about to plaster a fake smile on, not knowing what to expect especially when it came to his friends, and hoped that the grandchildren were not as stuck-up as their elders. But his eyes instantly widened at an overly familiar group of six people and he rubbed his eyes, wondering if he had just hallucinated the scene.

“Yoonoh, these are the grandchildren of my closest friends from university,” his grandfather revealed with possibly, the biggest smile he had ever sported since the beginning of the event. A miracle “This is Suh Youngho, Lee Taeyong, Kang Seulgi, Wong Kunhang, Dong Sicheng, and–”

“I know them, Grandpa,” he suddenly blurted out.

“You do?”

“Yeah, we know Jae– I mean, Yoonoh,” Johnny said swiftly as if his presence didn’t bother him a single bit. “As a matter of fact, I’m part of the radio broadcasting club with him.”

“Well, that’s just wonderful!” his grandfather exclaimed. “Now, I know Yoonoh won’t force himself to make small talk with the guests that I introduce him to.”

The six all laughed along with the old man whereas Jaehyun and his girlfriend stood there awkwardly. Jaehyun’s eyes wandered to the girl who had been occupying his mind for the last 24 hours but the latter expertly avoided his gaze as she kept conversing with her grandfather with expert ease about foreign affairs.

“I heard that you became–” his grandfather’ glanced over at Naeun subtly, “–the club’s President.”

“Ah, yes,” Cerca Trova’s leader replied with a small smile and her chin high. “the members deemed me suitable for the role and has elected me for the position.”

“With your leadership skills and intellect, I wouldn’t be surprised,” he continued and then brought a hand on Jaehyun’s shoulders. “As a past member, do you think it’s too late for you to initiate my grandson into the club? No need to give him an executive position or anything, but I’d like him to get more familiar and comfortable with our world, if you understand what I mean.”

“Of course, it’s never too late,” she replied without never looking at Jaehyun properly, which was starting to irritate him to no end. “If anything, he’s already like a member of the club, seeing that he discovered our existence and managed to find tangible proof.”

“Is that so?” he exclaimed in delight. “I never spoke to him about it. I’m surprised that he was able to do so.”

“Well, I suppose that just shows just how much potential he has as a future journalist.”

“What is this club that you guys are talking about?” Naeun asked shyly.

Jaehyun looked over at the club’s executive members, wondering if it was okay to reveal the truth to an outsider.

“It’s this secret society that Jaehyun wrote about as a feature article for the school’s paper,” Johnny answered, surprising Jaehyun since he didn’t expect him out of all of them to disclose the truth. “I’m sure you read all about it. The article was tight.”

“Yeah, at first, I had my doubts,” Sicheng added. “but it was a well-written article. You should be proud of him, Mr. Jung.”

“I haven’t read it yet, but I’m already proud of him,” he said before he addressed their group’s leader. “So, tell me, has your grandparents found a suitable man for you to marry?”

The girl choked on the champagne she was sipping as she listened to his grandfather. Taeyong immediately patted her back whereas Johnny handed her a napkin for her to wipe her lips.

Jaehyun immediately averted his eyes, not understanding why he felt so uncomfortable watching the scene. But his heart dropped when he heard the word marry coming out from his grandfather’s lips. He never knew that the girl was supposed to marry someone anytime soon. She never mentioned it.

But if she were supposed to marry someone of her grandparents’ liking, then why did she even bother to confess to him?

He didn’t understand his sudden frustration at the situation.

“Ah, I see that the top two contenders are still Youngho and Taeyong,” he said in a teasing tone.

Jaehyun’s head immediately whipped up at his statement and then swivelled to see the girl’s reaction.

“May I be so polite to inquire why Mr. Jung is so curious about my… future engagement?”

“Well, since my grandson finally made his debut into society,” he said, “I was thinking of speaking with your grandparents about him being a possible candidate.”

Now, it was Jaehyun’s turn to choke on nothing. “Grandpa–”

Without a warning, Naeun stormed off, leaving their little group with some sort of awkward tension. Jaehyun politely excused himself before running after his girlfriend. He ran around the mansion before deciding that perhaps she was outside. He found her leaning against the gate right outside, her arms crossed.

“Hey,” he said in a little voice, afraid that he’ll scare her off.

She sighed deeply and turned to him. “What am I doing here, Jaehyun?”

He didn’t understand. “You’re here for me, of course,” he replied.

His girlfriend let out a self-deprecating chuckle. “No, we all know that’s a lie.”

“Wh-what do you mean?”

“I mean, there is no place for me in your life anymore,” she replied bluntly. “Why didn’t you tell me that your grandfather found an internship for you?”

Jaehyun paused as he didn’t understand why it was so hard for him to tell her the truth. Instead, he said, “Because we already made plans to travel for the summer.”

She scoffed. “And you thought that not telling me about it was a good move on your part?” Naeun then pushed herself off from the gate and brought a hand to her forehead as she laughed bitterly. “Did you even see the way your grandfather looked at me? As if I– I was beneath you guys?”

“You’re not beneath–”

“I have never felt so humiliated in my life,” she mumbled under her breath.

“I’m sorry,” Jaehyun quickly apologized. “I’ll talk to my grandfather and–”

“You think it’s just your grandfather?” Naeun cut him off.

Jaehyun’s hand clenched in frustration. Somewhere deep inside him knew that they were going to break up eventually—he couldn’t bear lying to himself anymore. But it had never been his intention to hurt Naeun like this. He never wanted to hurt her in the process. Perhaps a part of him genuinely thought that it was a phase that was going to pass quickly. But if he couldn’t lie to himself, then how could he lie to Naeun about his true feelings?

“I thought I was wrong,” Naeun said, her head facing her feet, “when I visited you at your campus yesterday and I saw you with her. You just looked so different. You looked… alive. And I kept telling myself that she was just a classmate—a friend, you insisted—but I’m not a fool.” She then looked up to him with pleading eyes. “Tell me that I’m wrong, Jaehyun-ah.”

Jaehyun remained silent, his fist clenching and unclenching, trembling by his own cowardice and how he couldn’t even reassure his girlfriend that she had nothing to worry about.

“Tell me!”

“I’m– I’m sorry,” Jaehyun gasped out, “I’m sorry…”

Jaehyun thought she was going to get mad at him—anything—but she did none of that. Instead, the girl sighed and let out a bitter laugh, “I’m sorry too.”

Jaehyun looked at her, utterly confused by this turn of events. Why wasn’t Naeun yelling at him, anymore? Why wasn’t she mad that he fell for someone else?

“People change. And their feelings too,” Naeun told him. “I shouldn’t get mad at you for falling for someone else.”

“I–”

“I’m going to stop making you look like you’re the bad guy in this situation,” she then said. “I’m not mad… just frustrated that I am not angry. I expected this awful feeling to overcome me the second you confess, but I’m… relieved.” She smiled at him. “I’m relieved that you found someone who looks at you the same way you look at them.”

Jaehyun looked away. He knew the girl liked him, but he doubted that the depth of her feelings could be compared to his, especially since she looked like she was betrayed by him for not telling her about Naeun—which was understandable. But from that, he just assumed that even if things had ended between him and Naeun, the chances of them becoming a couple vanished.

“I’m kind of jealous, you know?” Naeun commented lightheartedly. “I’ve never seen you look at me the same way you look at her.”

“I– I’m sorry,” Jaehyun mumbled. That was all he could do at the moment—apologize.

“Why are you apologizing?” Naeun asked. Jaehyun took a look at his now ex-girlfriend’s face and found that there was no remorse or regret present in her expression.

“Go chase your happiness.”

Jaehyun has a girlfriend.

Four words that haunted me ever since I have met the latter. I sighed as I leaned back against the leather seat of the car, ignoring the questioning look my friends had given me. Ever since yesterday, there was an odd tension in the air as if they were afraid of saying the wrong thing—saying something that could set me off.

Like a ticking time bomb.

“I didn’t know that he was taken,” Johnny mumbled next to me, “or else, I would have told you about it.”

I let out a low chuckle. “Don’t tell me you actually feel bad for me?”

“I’m just saying,” he continued, “he shouldn’t have led you on like that.”

I pursed my lips. “He didn’t.” I insisted again when I saw the look on his face. “He didn’t. So, let’s just focus on having fun at this lame obligatory party, please? What time are Seulgi, Sicheng and Hendery going to arrive?”

“They’re already there waiting for us,” Taeyong answered from my other side.

“Did your parents say anything about this Yoonoh guy?” Johnny asked. “My parents– Actually no, my grandparents want me to befriend him. Something about him being the grandkid of their friends from uni or something. Yuck.”

I gave him a side-eye. “Youngho, we’re friends because of our grandparents.”

He waved my comment aside. “Not the same thing.”

I gave Taeyong a pleading look and he shrugged in response. He had always been the rational one between the three of us, the cool-headed one. But sometimes, that also meant that he’d stay out of the arguments I would have with Johnny just so that he could remain neutral.

At our arrival, we immediately greeted our family elders first before reuniting with our friends. Seulgi, Sicheng, and Hendery already looked bored to death. Even with our arrival, it looked like they were dreading the party even more.

“Well, you know what we usually do,” Johnny said as he popped a bottle of champagne out of nowhere and wiggled his eyebrows. “To cope with painfully boring parties, we form a sub-party with a small touch of alcohol.”

At that, my friends’ expressions immediately brightened. As we were in the search for an empty room inside this huge mansion, all of our grandparents suddenly joined our little circle, accompanied by Mr. Jung, who was a newspaper magnate and the grandfather of this Yoonoh guy we were supposed to get ourselves acquainted with.

Johnny immediately hid the bottle of champagne behind him and mustered a smile as we were faced with our grandparents’ small interrogation (i.e. “Where do you think you youngsters are going?”).

“We were thinking of searching for the guest of honour!” Taeyong replied smoothly. “We’ve heard a lot about your grandson, Mr. Jung.”

Thanks to Taeyong’s wittiness, we managed to evade a small crisis. But it also dragged us into an abnormally long and unnecessary conversation we were trying to avoid from the start. It then led Mr. Jung of wanting to formally introduce us to his grandson, who—to our surprise—was also attending SNU.

“Have you guys even heard of someone named Jung Yoonoh that attends our school?” Hendery asked under his breath as we followed the newspaper magnate.

“Well, you don’t really pay attention to anyone else other than us and Cerca Trova, so I already know your answer,” Seulgi replied. When Hendery gave her a look, silently asking her the same question he had asked, she then sighed and looked away from him with a small huff. “And no, I’ve never heard of him, either.”

“I didn’t even know that he has a grandson,” Sicheng commented. “What kind of person do you guys think he is?”

“Vapid? Arrogant? Spoiled?” Johnny added.

“Well, that’s rich coming from us,” I replied with a small snort.

He winked. “Exactly why I am confident we’ll get along just fine.”

Mr. Jung stopped and clapped on the back on a young man, whom I assumed was his grandson. Hendery abruptly turned around and made us halt in our tracks. “Okay, what’s our game plan?”

“Game plan?” Taeyong repeated, confused. “Why do we need a game plan?”

“Like, do we hate him? Do we like him?”

“We haven’t even met him,” I deadpanned.

I then pushed him slightly towards Mr. Jung so that we could get a move on. The earlier we were done meeting the man’s grandson, the earlier we could leave.

“Yoonoh, these are the grandchildren of my closest friends from university,” Mr. Jung said as soon as he saw us. “This is Suh Youngho, Lee Taeyong, Kang Seulgi, Wong Kunhang, Dong Sicheng, and–”

My eyes almost bulged out in surprise when I realized just who exactly was Jung Yoonoh. I could tell that my friends were surprised as well with their slightly agape mouth. They usually weren’t ones to be easily shocked either.

Jaehyun was the first one out of us to regain his composure. “I know them, Grandpa.”

“You do?” his grandfather asked with delight.

“Yeah, we know Jae– I mean, Yoonoh,” Johnny said swiftly as if his presence didn’t bother him a single bit. “As a matter of fact, I’m part of the radio broadcasting club with him.”

“Well, that’s just wonderful!” his grandfather exclaimed. “Now, I know Yoonoh won’t force himself to make small talk with the guests that I introduce him to.”

I retreated slightly into my small shell when I noticed Jaehyun’s date.

Of course, he’d bring his girlfriend. I thought to myself, feeling a little bit stupid. Who else was he going to bring?

I was thankful that my friends were doing such a good job at entertaining Mr. Jung’s questions, until the latter directed them to me specifically. Although I was a bit startled, I appreciated the distraction it had provided me. Not to mention how conscious I was of Jaehyun’s eyes boring at me.

Stop it.

Stop looking at me.

Stop looking at me like that when your girlfriend is standing right next to you.

Mr. Jung called me out once again after Taeyong wrapped up on his take on foreign affairs.

“Yes?” I said as I broke out of my small reverie.

Mr. Jung seemed wary of Jaehyun’s girlfriend as he asked me, “I heard that you became… the club’s President.”

I blinked, momentarily forgetting that he was both an alumnus and a past member of Cerca Trova. “Ah, yes. The members deemed me suitable for the role and has elected me for the position.”

“With your leadership skills and intellect, I wouldn’t be surprised,” he continued and then brought a hand on Jaehyun’s shoulders. “As a past member, do you think it’s too late for you to initiate my grandson into the club? No need to give him an executive position or anything, but I’d like him to get more familiar and comfortable with our world, if you understand what I mean.”

I tried not to let the surprise show on my face. 

From the numerous conversations I’ve had with Jaehyun, the thing that was so distinctive and characteristic of him was that he knew what he wanted to become after graduation—had known for a while, in fact. Mr. Jung was aware of Cerca Trova’s true goal as an alumnus, so why would he want to initiate his grandson to the club?

I wanted to refuse because initiating Jaehyun into the club would only confuse him further. And I didn’t want him to suffer the same fate as we did. Yes, Mr. Jung was a newspaper magnate and perhaps, Jaehyun will inherit it one day. But he wasn’t made to be a businessman.

Jaehyun wanted to write.

I stole a glance over at Jaehyun, wondering what were his thoughts were on the subject, but his face didn’t show a single hint of his true feelings. I mentally sighed to myself and plastered a smile onto my face as I replied,

“Of course, it’s never too late,” I replied and averted my eyes when Jaehyun’s met with mine. I decided to investigate slightly what the elder had in mind. “If anything, he’s already like a member of the club, seeing that he discovered our existence and managed to find tangible proof.”

Johnny subtly elbowed me, silently asking me what exactly was I doing.

I ignored him.

“Is that so?” Mr. Jung exclaimed. “I never spoke to him about it. I’m surprised that he was able to do so.”

I gave him a tight smile. “Well, I suppose that just shows just how much potential he has as a future journalist.”

Out of nowhere, Naeun asked, “What is this club that you guys are talking about?”

Jaehyun looked over at us. He was probably wondering if it was okay to reveal the truth to an outsider.

“It’s this secret society that Jaehyun wrote about as a feature article for the school’s paper,” Johnny answered. “I’m sure you read all about it. The article was tight.”

I tried not to glare at Johnny. Just what was he planning?

“Yeah, at first, I had my doubts,” Sicheng continued, “but it was a well-written article. You should be proud of him, Mr. Jung.”

I tried not to make my skepticism obvious, but really, even Sicheng? Who was against Jaehyun writing the article from the beginning? I tried to make sense of my friends’ dubious plans—they had always been mischievous—as I sipped on the champagne.

“I haven’t read it yet, but I’m already proud of him,” Mr. Jung said before switching his attention back to me.

This time, it was Taeyong’s turn to elbow me when he realized that I wasn’t paying attention to the elder. I hissed at him before going back to my flute of champagne.

“So, tell me, has your grandparents found a suitable man for you to marry?”

The sparkling liquid went down the wrong tube, making me cough. Taeyong probably felt bad and helped me by patting on my back whereas Johnny was trying to hold his laughter in as much as he could as he handed me his handkerchief.

For some reason, my eyes landed briefly on particular handsome journalist as I wiped my lips, careful not to wipe away my lip makeup and to keep my expression as indifferent as possible.

God, he looks so good in that suit.

Mr. Jung laughed wholeheartedly as he said in a teasing tone, “Ah, I see that the top two contenders are still Youngho and Taeyong.” 

Jaehyun’s head immediately whipped up at his statement and then swivelled around, facing me all of a sudden. Properly facing me this time. He looked betrayed. And I refrained myself from scoffing out loud at his hypocrisy.

My engagement to either Johnny and Taeyong had never been set properly. It was just something that our family elders had discussed even before the three of us were born. What was the point of telling him of a possible engagement to either of my best friends? Unlike him, I didn’t hide that I had a significant other.

I cleared my throat as I kept my eyes on Jaehyun. “May I be so polite to inquire why Mr. Jung is so curious about my… future engagement?”

“Well, since my grandson finally made his debut into society,” he said, “I was thinking of speaking with your grandparents about him being a possible candidate.”

“Grandpa–”

All of a sudden, Jaehyun’s girlfriend stormed off. I only realized belatedly how insensitive the conversation was, momentarily forgetting her presence within the conversation. I slightly felt bad for Naeun. I never expected Mr. Jung to bring up my engagement when Jaehyun’s girlfriend was probably already introduced to him. But it was my fault for not seeing it coming.

I tried to ignore the ugly green monster that was threatening to overcome me as I watched Jaehyun run after Naeun.

“Children, excuse me for a moment, I see my other friends.”

We all bowed as the elder made his exit. It took every ounce of my energy to not lash out. I understood perfectly just how cruel and insensitive the people in our world could be, but for whatever reason, I thought maybe Jaehyun’s grandfather was different. After all, they shared the same DNA.

“Well, that was unexpected,” Sicheng said with a sharp exhale.

“Never mind that.” Seulgi frowned. “Are we really going to initiate Jaehyun into the club?”

“Well, he’s a legacy, so we can’t say no if he wants to join,” Johnny refuted.

Taeyong rubbed his jaw pensively. “Does he even want to join, though? Mr. Jung did say he wants us to initiate him so he can get used to quote-unquote our world, but what if he doesn’t want to? He’s doing just fine without all this glitz and glamour.”

“Um, so we’re not going to address the fact that she’s getting engaged to either Johnny or Taeyong?” Hendery cut in, his eyes wide. “And now Jaehyun might be in the race?”

I snapped at all of them. “No one is getting engaged.” I breathed out sharply as I kneaded my temple, suddenly feeling a headache coming on and the alcohol that I drank previously was not helping my case. “And about Jaehyun’s membership, we’ll talk about it during our meeting. For now, let’s just…”

“Let’s find a room where we won’t be forced to make polite conversations,” Taeyong continued my train of thought, rescuing me. I mouthed him a silent ‘thanks’.

Johnny flanked my side as we searched for an empty room. “Are you sure you don’t want to go after him?”

It was useless to act stupid with the giant. “You mean, interrupt the love birds? No, thank you.”

He rolled his eyes. He was awfully calm about this whole situation—the complete opposite of my current state of mind. “I didn’t mean it that way. Given how she ran off, they’re probably in an argument. I’m saying, go after Jaehyun and give him your support as a friend.”

I rubbed my arms awkwardly. “I’m not even sure whether he wants me as a friend or not.”

“What, because of his girlfriend?” Johnny said mockingly, spitting out that last word distastefully. I slapped his arm in response. “Ouch! What was that for?”

“Have a little bit of respect for her, would you?” I replied. “Especially with the way Jaehyun’s grandfather treated her.”

Johnny blew a raspberry. “Okay, but Mr. Jung’s attitude towards her aside, do you really think I will have an ounce of respect for her if she were to tell Jaehyun to stop being friends with you? If she truly trusted Jaehyun, she wouldn’t have to ask him that.”

Once in a blue moon, Suh Youngho made valid points.

So, where did that leave me?

“God, I hate you,” I said as I spun around and headed towards the exit, where I had a feeling Jaehyun would be.

“Only sometimes,” my best friend replied cheekily.

I made my way for the exit, occasionally greeting back the people who mentioned how long it had been since they last seen me, and breathed out a sigh of relief when I noticed Jaehyun sitting on the ground against the gate.

Alone.

Ignoring how my mum would chastise me for getting my dress dirty, I took a seat next to the dejected male. I bit my bottom lip in contemplation, wondering just how I should begin what seemed to be an awkward conversation. A conversation that I was certain that Jaehyun didn’t want to have, but one I deemed was necessary.

I think.

“Are you okay?” I said, lamely.

“What do you think?” Jaehyun snapped at me. “I just got dumped.”

I had a feeling that he was mad—and he had the right to be, of course—but I never expected him to talk to me this way. I gulped down the anxiety that crept upon me and asked, “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.” His voice was firm, unwavering. “Just go back to your two fiancés or something.”

I flinched back, alarmed by the tone of his voice. I understood that he was angry and perhaps resentful. God, of course, I did. But I didn’t come out of my way, fighting against my rationality and my anxiety, and look for him—worried sick about him—so that I was going to be disrespected this way.

“Okay,” I said with a snort. “I get it that you’re mad—whatever. But you’re misplacing your anger. Maybe you’re scared. Maybe you’re confused. And so, you’re picking a fight. You know that, yeah?”

I was resilient in keeping my foot to the ground. I wasn’t about to let him talk to me that way when I haven’t done anything to deserve such treatment. But what I failed to take into consideration was the teary red eyes, the sniffing nose, and the complete utter devastation on his face.

I hated how it automatically rendered me weak.

“I’m sorry,” I ended up saying softly. “D-do you need a hug?”

He shook his head before reburying his face into his arms. “It’s alright, just give me a minute to settle a little. And then we can talk about my initiation.”

I felt unsettled with the way he was compartmentalizing his feelings like that. Could they be so easily discarded like that so that he could move on to the next thing? As much as he respected and admired his grandfather and wanted to make the latter proud, what about his own feelings, though? What about his own ambitions?

I got up and patted the dust away from my bottom. “No, there will be no initiation so there’s nothing to talk about.”

At my words, Jaehyun immediately whipped his head and pushed himself up at a frightening speed. “What do you mean there’s no initiation?”

“I said what I said.” I crossed my arms. “You will not be initiated into Cerca Trova.”

He had the gall to scoff at me. “I’m a legacy. You can’t do this to me.”

“Says who?” I fired back. “As far as I’m concerned, I’m the President with the right to veto whatever decision the execs make. And as President, I don’t think you’re fit to be part of the club.”

“Why? Because I’m not part of your clique? I’m not good enough for you?”

I narrowed my eyes at the male, not liking where this was going one bit. “I don’t know what you’re trying to imply here, but I’m trying to be your friend, right now.”

“And how exactly are you doing that?”

“You honestly believe that you want to be part of Cerca Trova? That you’re doing this for yourself and not for your grandfather?”

At my question, he froze. “Wh-what is that supposed to mean?”

“I think in here,” I poked at his chest, where his heart was, “you know exactly what I mean. But right now, you’re lost, confused. You’re not thinking rationally like you usually do. So, I’m going to ask you, once again.”

I took a step back and stared right at him, unflinching.

“What do you want to become when you turn into an adult?”

He remained unresponsive.

“Will you be happy if you follow whatever plan your grandfather has for you?”

A couple of weeks had passed since the incident at Jaehyun’s grandparents’ mansion, and I hadn’t spoken to him ever since. We still shared the same two classes but both of us had gotten out of our ways to expertly avoid one another. But I was probably the one who made more efforts.

Johnny didn’t understand why I didn’t take this opportunity to make Jaehyun my boyfriend.

His words, not mine.

I never realized how long it had been since we last spoken until Johnny and I were both in line to take our graduation pictures. Johnny, Taeyong and I decided to apply for early graduation.

“It’s obvious that you two share mutual feelings, so why delay it?” he said offhandedly and then furrowed his brows as he asked, “Wait, is this about his initiation to Cerca Trova?”

I sighed, feeling a bit tired. “It’s more complicated than you think.”

“You’re still not letting him in?” Taeyong said from my other side.

“It’s not my decision to make,” I retorted back. “If that’s what he wants, then I’d be happy to welcome him. But right now, he doesn’t know what he wants. Not just about the club but also… from me.”

My friends obviously knew what I meant. To be in a relationship with either one of us… it wasn’t something to be taken light of by both parties. We were all raised to shoulder the responsibilities that came our life, but what about those who weren’t? Jaehyun might be part of the same world now, but it didn’t mean that he would easily adhere by the same values.

And I didn’t let him forget that.

Falling this hard for him this far along, of course I’d be over the moon if ever we were to be in a serious relationship. But if that meant there was the possibility that Jaehyun could regret making his decision based on his grandfather during this period of confusion, I’d rather not be with him. Even if it meant that I was headed for a broken heart.

Jaehyun had been thrown into this state of confusion, by not only his grandfather, but also by his ex-girlfriend. Distancing myself from him so that he could sort out his feelings properly was something I should do.

“Did you tell Jaehyun that you were graduating early?” Taeyong asked.

I grimaced at his question. “Why would I go out of my way to tell him that I’ll be graduating?” I then pushed him towards the photographer who was waiting for the next student. “Go on, we don’t have all day.”

Taeyong stuck his tongue out at me and sat down in front of the photographer.

Both Johnny and I stayed silent and watched Taeyong getting his pictures taken. We would occasionally give him some tips, but the boy was so good-looking, what was the point.

“You really do like him, huh?” Johnny mumbled out of nowhere.

I choked on nothing. “What makes you say so?”

“Because,” he said as he fixed my graduation cap and flicked my nose, “if it were any other guy, you wouldn’t care this much.”

I narrowed my eyes at the taller male. “Have I mentioned that I hate you?”

“Several times but I know you still love me,” he replied nonchalantly. “Taeyong’s done now—it’s your turn.”

I groaned in fake disgust before making my way towards the stool in front of the green screen. It was only half an hour later that the three of us were done. It was a little bit after one, so we decided to head out for a late lunch.

We were debating on what kind of cuisine we should go for when Johnny suddenly halted in his steps and waved at someone afar. I didn’t pay much attention—I assumed it was just one of Johnny’s friends that we didn’t know about—and continued arguing with Taeyong about lunch.

It was only until his friend got closer that I realized that I should have paid more attention.

Jaehyun paused just a tiny bit before resuming his walk towards us. Meanwhile, I cursed at Johnny as much as I could in my head while trying to my best to keep my composure.

Hey, what’s up?

No, that sounds too awkward.

How have you been?

Wait, is that too stiff?

“Hey, guys,” Jaehyun greeted us with an easy-going smile. “Done with a class?”

I missed my timing to be cordial, great.

“No, actually, we just finished taking our graduation pictures,” Johnny replied.

I peeked over at Jaehyun, wondering what kind of expression he’d sport after hearing the news. But he kept his smile on, completely unbothered by the piece of information revealed to him. I sighed through my nose. I didn’t know what I expected.

“You should attend our graduation ceremony,” Taeyong said. “Cerca Trova will be having an after-party. As a new member, you should also come so that you can get familiar with the other members.”

“As a new member…?” Jaehyun’s eyes glanced over at me before averting back to Taeyong. He then cleared his throat. “Oh, um, I thought that I wasn’t allowed to be in the club?”

Johnny subtly pinched my side and I hissed at the pain. Though, that caught Jaehyun’s attention. I made a mental note to myself that I should take revenge on Johnny, but focused on the task ahead.

“It doesn’t matter what I think or decide,” I answered curtly. “After graduation, I’ll be gone so my decision will be voided. Might as well properly introduce you as a new member.”

Taeyong laughed awkwardly as he slung an arm around my shoulders. “Excuse her, she’s a little bit grumpy because she hasn’t had lunch yet. So, we should go before she gets even crankier.”

“O-oh, uh, sure,” Jaehyun said with a hand behind his neck.

“The graduation ceremony is next Friday,” Johnny informed him as we slowly walked away. “Be there or be square!”

The few weeks leading up to graduation had been nothing but eventful and stressful. Those who were planning on graduating early didn’t have a choice but to pass all of their classes.

It was the last hurrah of a chapter in our lives.

In-between the numerous studying, exams, and essays, I didn’t think that I would even have the time and luxury to ponder whether Jaehyun was going to attend the graduation ceremony or not. But the boy managed to slip in-between the small crevices of my mind that emerged during the occasional breaks that Taeyong had forced me to take.

Next thing I knew, I was wearing an indigo graduation gown and cap.

My parents along with Johnny’s and Taeyong’s attended the ceremony together. So, it wasn’t a surprise that the six of them were circled up and chatting with Seulgi, Sicheng, and Hendery.

“Congratulations on graduating, my dear,” my parents said and pecked me on both cheeks.

“Thank you,” I said and then accepted the congratulations from my friends.

“Can’t believe you three are going ahead without us,” Hendery whined after he handed me a bouquet of roses and carnations. “Who’s going to keep Seulgi in check now that you guys are going to be gone?”

I hugged him back and messed his hair. “You’ll be fine, Kunhang.”

Hendery gasped dramatically. “Are you going to die soon? Why did you call me by my Chinese name?”

“Because it’s still your name doofus,” I said with a roll of my eyes.

And while the others chatted and took pictures among themselves, my eyes wandered around the venue, hoping to see a certain journalist amidst the crowd. I guess my disappointment was evident when Johnny gave me an apologetic smile.

As we were about to enter the car to head over for our after-party, I then heard someone shout my name in the distance. I looked around and asked Seulgi who was behind me if she heard something. The girl’s brows furrowed as she focused on her surroundings and shook her head. I nodded my head, about to get in the car when Seulgi abruptly pulled me out and shouted, “Wait!”

I tried not to grunt at the sheer force she was using to get me out of the vehicle. The girl might be slim but God was she strong for someone of her stature.

I frowned as I tried to make sense of what exactly was going on. “What?” I said to Seulgi, who then pointed me to a running figure in the distance. After a few seconds, I could make out the silhouette to be Jaehyun.

“Oh,” I lamely said.

My friends got into the car, giving me some privacy.

“We’ll head out first,” Johnny told me with a wink and a cringey peace sign before the car drove off, not leaving me any time to reply.

Jaehyun was breathless by the time he had reached me, beads of sweat dripping from his forehead. He was in a formal attire, which made me wonder-

“I did attend the graduation ceremony,” he said in-between deep breaths, “but I thought it would be rude of me to come and not give you something so I went to the nearest flower shop, not realizing that it’d take me this long.”

He then handed me a beautiful blue single hydrangea bloom wrapped in the latest issue of The Daily SNU and then mumbled, his ears evidently red. “Congratulations on graduating early.”

I softly smiled at the sight and accepted the flower. “Thank you.”

A pregnant silent then fell upon us. As expected since we hadn’t spoken properly in a while. We both opened up our mouths at the same time, causing me to giggle.

“You go first,” I ended up saying.

Jaehyun cleared his throat several times, to the point where I seriously thought that he might have choked on something. He then pulled at his tie and unbuttoned his shirt, saying that it was too hot and needed some air.

“Do you…” he started to say

“Do I…?”

“Do you not like me anymore?”

My jaw literally dropped at his unexpected question – so unexpected that it rendered me completely speechless and stumbling upon my words. The person that asked me the question seemed even more embarrassed that I was. 

Jaehyun was literally about to turn around and run away as he said, “I’m so sorry, let me do over. I don’t know what came over me.”, his hands covering his reddening cheeks.

“Wait,” I said as I pulled him back and kept my hand firmly wrapped around his. “where did that question come from?”

He avoided my eyes with expert ease. “I-I mean, you’ve been avoiding me… and didn’t even tell me that you applied for early graduation… What was I supposed to think?”

I chuckled to myself as I didn’t foresee that my own plan was going to backfire on me.

“Jaehyun, I haven’t been avoiding you.”

“You haven’t?” he said, surprised.

“Well, yes, maybe I avoided you just a little,” I admitted reluctantly. “But most importantly, I was trying to give you space.”

“Space?”

“You were going through a lot during that time,” I explained. “You know, with your overwhelming grandfather and your breakup. You had much to think about, and I didn’t want to add more onto your plate.”

“Oh,” Jaehyun chuckled awkwardly. “Yeah, that makes a lot more sense, now.”

I raised a brow at him. “Wait, so you really thought that I didn’t like you anymore? That my feelings were gone just like that?”

“W-well, I mean, it’s possible, right?” He kept his eyes on the ground. “I did get mad at you even though you didn’t do anything to deserve that.” He exhaled deeply. “I’m sorry.”

My eyes softened at his apology. “I know you are.” He looked confused, like a lost puppy. I raised the stem of hydrangea and waved it around a little. “Blue hydrangea symbolizes gratitude and understanding, and usually is always a thoughtful way of admitting that you’re sorry. Unless, I’m reading too much into–”

“No!” he immediately cut me off. “You’re right. I am sorry, and I am grateful not only for your understanding, but just about… everything.”

“So, does this mean that you thought about it clearly and have made up your mind?” I asked as I let go of his hand, but he refused to let mine go. He grabbed a hold of my hand and clasped them together tightly, almost as if he was afraid.

“Yeah,” he answered firmly, his eyes clear.

“What have you decided, then?”

He took a deep breath. “I’ll join Cerca Trova.”

“You will?”

He nodded assertively. “Yeah, I figured it was a nice way to network too. I’m still going to chase my dreams and become a first-class journalist that gets to travel the world and tell stories.” Jaehyun then shrugged. “Just figured that there are many other ways to do so, and perhaps the club will help me navigate through this newly opened path.”

“That’s great,” I answered with smiling eyes.

Jaehyun then slowly approached me, his face just lingering a few centimetres above mine, and he whispered, “So?”

“So?” I repeated in the same soft tone.

He gently pressed his forehead against mine with his eyes closed and asked me in a small murmur, “Will you be my girlfriend?”

“I don’t know,” I answered teasingly. “Did you ask your grandfather for his permission, first?”

“Haha, very funny,” he said as he smoothly placed his hands behind my waist without moving away. “Can you please answer my question? I’m trying to be serious, here.”

I bit my bottom lip and nodded. “Yes, I’ll be your girlfriend.”

“C-can I kiss you?” he then shyly asked.

I almost cooed at the fact that he actually asked for my permission, but decided not to tease him any further as I said, “Yes.”

Jaehyun gently cupped my cheeks with his hands. “I think I love you.” He quickly added, “I mean, I know I do. I love you.”

These words were what I’d been longing to hear for so long. I basically squeaked when I asked timidly, “Really? You’re not–”

Jaehyun then sealed my lips, silencing me. This sweet kiss of his was his answer. It intoxicated me, and I responded to it in kind. His kisses were so soft and tender. I was starting to think that I enjoyed these sweet kisses. I don’t think I could ever get tired of them.

“Say it,” he mumbled against my lips. “Say it back.”

“I love you too.”

I was suddenly overcome with shyness and happiness all at once.

His vibrating phone interrupted us and he sent me an apologetic grin as he checked out the content of his device. He chortled and revealed to me what was sent to him, “Johnny said that he’s happy for us and that everyone’s waiting for us.” He tilted his head at me, slightly in awe. “How did he even know?”

I shrugged. “Johnny can be a bit of a mystery sometimes.” I then pulled him towards the direction of the university’s parking lot, where my car was. “Let’s head over to the after-party before Johnny makes a scene.”

Jaehyun followed me without any hesitation and swung our arms around giddily.

“Hey,” he then said. “I forgot to ask you an important question. I guess it’s better late than never.”

I hummed in response as he had piqued my curiosity. “What is it?”

He gave me a childish grin and suddenly pecked my nose.

“What do you want to do after graduation?”

THE END. 

© SMOLL-TANGERINE [2020]. All rights reserved.

[thewonandonly]

01:57 — if you were my little girl, i'd do whatever i could do, i'd run away and hide with you l daddy issues by the neighbourhood

here's a little snippet to a fic im writing 🫣 erm, i hope you enjoy!

jaehyun leaned his arm on the wall, right above your head. his face was close enough to see the details. he smelt good - like rose and ember; so much so it was intoxicating. his dimples and his eyes as he smiled, the faint stubble along his chin and upper lip. sculpted from marble by michelangelo himself.

the faint smell of alcohol from his red solo cup and a puddle of the spilled liquor from a drunk attendee swirled around the both of you.

"don't you have a game tomorrow?" you spoke into his ear over the music, feeling your heart flutter as he turned his head slightly so you didn't have to move much.

he chuckled, shrugging, "it's kinda tradition to visit before a game." he responded, his lips gently brushing against your cheek as he spoke.

you nodded as he moved back to his position, smiling at him, "so, do you always linger around the university or...?"

"no," he shook his head, "but, i mean, if i got to find someone as beautiful as you, maybe it's not a bad idea."

someone nudged behind him, causing him to straighten up with his chest hitting your own. he had you pressed flush against the wall, but he obviously wasn't focused on that as he glanced behind him, "a lot of energy for you students." he laughed as he looked back at you, "must be nice to be young."

you laughed, smiling at him, "aren't you only 26?"

"well, yeah, but..." he playfully rolled his neck over his shoulders, "at some point in time, these old bones have to rest."

"and you decided to do that at your old frat house with a bunch of newly turned 21 year olds?"

he shrugged again, "better than the old farts in the league." he glanced around the party, noticing multiple of the attendees either drinking to their restless end, making out with some of the bubbly blonde sorority sisters or passed out on the ground, table or couch. "but, you're right. wanna head out?"

"yo-you wanna leave with me?"

he laughed, "yeah!" he smiled, his dimples making an appearance once more, "how rare is it that i meet a beautiful woman here among all these girls?"

you blushed at his compliment, smiling before nodding your head, "yeah. yeah, let's head out."

copyright © 2023 thewonandonly. all rights reserved.

[ppangjae]

DIE FOR YOU | Jaehyun

—You won’t find no one that’s better.

SUMMARY. Jaehyun swore to never fall in love again after five unrequited crushes. But when all of his best friends get married and leave him behind, he might just break his oath. He just hopes that this time around, it’s not another unrequited love because he’s tired of throwing up flower petals.

GENRE. fluff and angst + f2l!au + hanahaki disease

note. hanahaki disease is a fictional disease. it’s an illness that occurs due to an unrequited love. the person experiencing unrequited love will throw up petals of their crush’s favourite flower. once the person experiences requited love, the disease will disappear.

WORD COUNT. 20.5k+ words (someone PLEASE stop me)

—I think I’m right for you.

Being inexperienced in falling in love would be an understatement. It wasn’t a choice, it was more of a predisposition made by fate. You’re not quite sure what you had done wrong in your past life that caused fate to curse you with such a boring love life. But as you blow out the twenty-two candles on your birthday cake, it reminds you that this is your twenty-second year of existing and yet you still don’t have someone that makes your heart flutter or skip one beat. At this point, you’re ready to give up. In fact, you’ve envisioned a future where you’d be single for the rest of your life and the only thing that’ll give you company will be your three puppies. Three cute puppies, yep, that sounds just about right. 

“Let me guess,” Jungwoo grins, “You wished for the miraculous improvement of your love life and possibly meeting the love of your life within the next two days.”

You let out a loud scoff. You’ve made the same wish for the past six years. Six years of making the same wish and it’s more than enough to give you the harsh reality that your wishes will never come true. Wishes never come true, if they do, they’re called miracles. 

“Wrong,” you smirk. “I wished for something else this year.”

“Oh?” He quirks an eyebrow. “What did you wish for this time?”

Your smirk drops. “If I tell you, my wish won’t come true.”

“Your wishes never come true, what makes this wish different?” He snickers. 

Jungwoo had a valid point. What makes this wish any different from all the wishes you’ve made? Since none of your wishes ever came true, what makes it any different that this wish will actually come true? Well, the difference this year is that the wish isn’t for you. The wish isn’t for your failing love life or for your defying fate. The wish is for your best friend Jaehyun. 

You spot Jaehyun poking his slice of cake with a fork. A warm, soft smile begins to spread your lips at the sight of your best friend. 

The closest feeling to falling in love that you’ve felt was surprisingly indirect heartbreak. You’ve never fallen in love, but you’ve watched Jaehyun fall in love five times. You’ve also watched Jaehyun’s heart break five times. Indirect heartbreak. Although you’ve never had an unrequited crush, you’ve seen Jaehyun experience it, and you can feel the pain—the heartbreak—that he goes through. 

You’ve always had a soft spot for Jaehyun. You’re the only one that knows about all his unrequited crushes. You’re the only one that knows about his disease, the sickness he feels whenever he experiences an unrequited love. You’re the only one that knows about his oath; that he swears to never fall in love again. But you think he deserves so much more. He deserves the whole entire universe, along with its galaxies and stars. 

And as his best friend, you gave up your birthday wish for him. 

You wish that the next person he falls in love with will be the one and not another unrequited love. 

“The cake is really sweet,” Jungwoo says as he reaches over to cut himself another slice. “Where did you get the cake?”

“Cha’s Cherry on Top,” you reply.

Jaehyun quirks an eyebrow. “Eunwoo made this?”

You smile while nodding your head. Jungwoo pulls out his phone and takes a picture of the cake along with the business card attached to the box.

“Eunwoo makes birthday cakes for you but not for me?” Jaehyun pouts. “So much for a best friend.”

“I guess that’s one of the many downsides of having a birthday on Valentine’s Day, Valentine boy.” Jungwoo teases. He receives a glare from Jaehyun in return.

You nod your head at Jungwoo’s phone. “You should really check out the bakery with Clara. You might be able to find the perfect wedding cake, discounted too!”

“Clara loves her discounts.” Jungwoo laughs. “At this point, anything helps.”

“It’s best to save more money for your baby,” you suggest. “She’s due in December, right?”

Jungwoo nods his head in reply. “Four months before our wedding.”

“Have you thought of names yet?” Jaehyun asks.

You and Jungwoo share a look that Jaehyun fails to notice. He’s too busy picking at his cake. Jungwoo clears his throat.

“We have but only names for a baby girl,” Jungwoo answers. “But we’ve been having trouble thinking of names for a baby boy. What do you have in mind, Jaehyun?”

You glance at your best friend. You bite your lip nervously. Jaehyun always wanted to start a family with the love of his life. But after experiencing five heartbreaks, it seems like he’s slowly changing his mind about his future.

“I’ve always wanted to name my son Yuno,” he confesses, finally scooping a forkful of cake and taking a small bite. “You should name your baby boy Yuno. I give you full permission. I’ll be his favourite uncle.”

Jungwoo’s face softens. “You’ll definitely be the favourite uncle, Jaehyun.”

The conversation ends at that. Jaehyun spends the rest of the day imagining how different his life would be if he just met the one. You spend the rest of your afternoon imagining how perfect of a father Jaehyun would be to his kids. That is, if Jaehyun decides to give love another try. You hope your birthday wish comes true. You hope Jaehyun finds the one.

Fate better get on with it.

Jaehyun experienced his first unrequited love at the sweet age of seventeen. It wasn’t the least bit pleasant. But she was so beautiful, she had a heart of gold, she was perfect. If he were to ever associate her with a colour, she’d be pink and yellow, just like the sight of pink and yellow peonies that he grew to hate because of her.

At the young age of seventeen, he learned to hate flowers. Flowers of every kind. He was diagnosed with Hanahaki Disease. The disease is only present whenever he experiences heartbreak from an unrequited love. When his feelings aren’t returned, it causes him to throw up petals of a flower. It could be any flower, but usually, it’s his unrequited lover’s favourite flower. It didn’t take him long to hate flowers no matter how beautiful they were because he never expected it to become a reminder of how far he was growing apart from the love of his life.

On the bright side, at the age of seventeen, he met you, his best friend. On the day he was rejected, he had mistakenly gone into the women’s washroom out of sheer panic and nervousness. The only thing on his mind at that moment was that he wasn’t feeling too great and he needed to throw up. You had entered the washroom a couple of minutes after, not expecting to see a guy throwing up pink and yellow peony petals in the toilet. It was a weird encounter, but that encounter soon became a secret only you and Jaehyun shared.

He’s been in love five times. He’s been heartbroken five times. But they all have hurt differently, especially his last relationship. He thought she was the one. He thought that she’d be the woman he’d spend the rest of his life with. He thought that she was his whole world. He thought she loved him the way he loved her. But she didn’t. At the same exact time, he didn’t expect to have a growing hatred for red roses.

“Are you feeling better?” He hears you ask as he coughs. He leans away from the toilet and flushes the rose petals. He presses his back against the wall and looks up at you.

“I’m tired,” he whispers. Your eyebrows knit together in confusion. As you take a seat next to him, you rest your head on his shoulder. “I’m tired of this, of everything. Why am I still in love with her?”

“When you love someone so much, letting go hurts so much more.” You mumble. “One day, she won’t even cross your mind. You just need to give your heart some time to heal.”

“It’s been eleven months.” He coughs again and you can feel and hear the emptiness in his lungs. He lets out a bitter chuckle. “Who knew that loving someone could hurt this much? To the point where my body gives in? To the point where I get sick?”

“People come in and out of everyone’s lives. It’s a given. But you can’t stop someone from stepping out of your life.” You explain. “She chose to leave. She chose not to stay. But one day, someone will choose to stay. Someone will choose to love you.”

“Do you think there’s someone out there that’ll choose me?”

You look up at him. He has an uncertain smile spread across his lips. You frown and hit his arm. He lets out a loud groan.

“Of course!” You exclaim. “She’s out there! It’s not the end of the world, Jaehyun.”

He laughs. “How could you say that when you haven’t even been in love or in a relationship? Aren’t you getting impatient? I’m sure you have doubts about your love life.”

You shake your head. “I know he’s out there. I’m not impatient. I’m very patient. Fate will bring us together someday. You just have to be faithful.”

“I wish I was as patient as you.”

“What can I say? I’m an expert. I’ve been single for twenty-two years!”

You find yourself sitting on Jungwoo’s couch accompanied by Jaehyun at ten past eleven in the evening. Jungwoo’s rummaging through his mini fridge for beer and you and Jaehyun are watching a Spongebob Squarepants rerun. 

There must be a reason as to why you and Jaehyun were dragged to Jungwoo’s small apartment out of sheer will. You were in the midst of cooking your dinner when Jungwoo showed up at your door. Oh how you wish you were at home right now, enjoying a tub of ice cream after having a scrumptious steak dinner. 

Jungwoo’s not sure what to expect from this, but his heart nervously beats faster than the ticking of his clock hung up on the wall. He tries to sneak a glance at his two best friends behind the fridge door and lets out a sigh. After arguing with himself, he juggles the cold cans of beer in his arms and joins you in the living room. Right when he plops his butt onto the couch and places the cans of beer onto the coffee table, his eyes meet yours. 

“Spill it, Jungwoo.”

“Drink some beer first—”

“There must be a reason why you dragged me out of the comfort of my own home—”

“So, this isn’t a hangout?” Jaehyun asks you. You nod and the room is silent. It’s so silent that you could hear Jungwoo gulp nervously. “Spill it, Jungwoo—”

“I hate being a burden to you guys but,” he begins before sighing frustratingly. “Clara and I are having trouble finding a perfect wedding planner. Since Clara is pregnant, the last thing I want her to do is stress out over our wedding.”

“We’ll help you find a wedding planner. You could’ve just asked.” Jaehyun chuckles before the dots start connecting in his head. He glances at you and you’re looking back at him with the same expression of realization. 

“Wait. You want us to be your wedding planners—”

“Yes, please.” Jungwoo begs. “I’ll even pay you for your time and work!”

“No.” You and Jaehyun say in unison. 

Jungwoo whines. “Do you not have some sort of sympathy for me, Jaehyun?”

“Nope.” He replies, pursing his lips into a tight line. His dimples show for a brief moment. 

“Y/N?” Jungwoo looks at you with hope in his eyes. 

You smirk. “Do I look like a wedding planner to you?”

“Well—”

“Then, no.” You cut him off while grabbing your can of beer from the coffee table. You take a sip of your beer and think about Jungwoo’s situation a second time. You tilt your head after much thought. “Actually, I don’t see anything wrong with that.”

Jaehyun looks at you as if you’ve gone insane. “Are you being serious right now?”

“Jungwoo’s going to pay us.” You shrug your shoulders. “All we have to do is just show up and pick and suggest what’s best for the wedding. It seems pretty simple.”

“You’re both our closest friends and we figured you knew us best. Thus, this would be a great idea.” Jungwoo convinces you. 

“He has a point.” You tell Jaehyun. “I’m in. Cheers to securing the bag.”

Jaehyun stares at you and Jungwoo as you clink beer cans. Jungwoo takes a sip of his beer and turns towards Jaehyun to give him puppy eyes. Jaehyun avoids his gaze and focuses on the TV. The characters on the show are laughing and their laughter echoes through Jaehyun’s mind, taunting him, haunting him, urging him to accept the offer. 

You watch the two with amusement and fold your arms. Jaehyun squints his eyes at Jungwoo and lets out a defeated sigh. There’s a fire that ignites in Jungwoo’s eyes. 

“When do we start?”

Cha’s Cherry on Top is everything you imagined it to be. It’s a busy bake shop filled with dedicated workers that display distinct personalities. For instance, the cashier that greets the three of you as you step in exudes nothing but a bright and cheery aura. It’s evident from her polka-dotted apron and cherry earrings. Working away behind the countertop are pastry chefs sporting pink aprons and rosy cheeks. But amidst all the hustle and bustle of the shop, Cha Eunwoo can be easily spotted with the human eye. 

In fact, he’s the first one you notice when you step into the shop. He’s frosting a freshly baked cake. You can’t help but swoon over how handsome the young pastry chef and owner is. It’s a shame that he’s off the market. 

“My strawberry shortcakes are finally here!” 

You snap out of your thoughts as Eunwoo brings you back to reality. He’s making his way towards the three of you. 

“Did you enjoy your birthday cake?” Eunwoo asks you. 

“It was delicious, thanks again.” You smile. 

“I’m glad to hear that.” He chirps. “Jungwoo! Congratulations on your engagement!”

Jungwoo sheepishly smiles, feeling all shy from the sudden attention he’s receiving. 

“The reason we dropped by was because—”

“You want me to create your wedding cake, don’t you?” Eunwoo grins. He throws his arm over your shoulder and you’re caught off guard. 

Jaehyun stares at Eunwoo’s arm that’s thrown over your shoulder. He’s not sure when or how you got close with each other. He doesn’t remember Eunwoo having so much skinship with you. 

“You came to the right place.” He flashes his pearly-white teeth as he smiles. His eyes form into beautiful crescents. “You’re lucky you’re good friends with Y/N. I always give discounts to her friends and family.”

You blow a kiss in Jungwoo’s direction. “Consider me your guardian angel, your one-way ticket to a perfect wedding. I’m expecting higher pay for this job, Jungwoo.”

Jaehyun nods his head at Eunwoo. “Do you have any samples prepared for us to taste?”

“Yep.” Eunwoo’s smile wipes off his face. “Hey, you didn’t show up to the group function for the third time! You didn’t even get a chance to taste the new chocolate croissants I baked!”

“At this rate, I’m going to get diabetes with all the cupcakes you bring to our hangouts.” Jaehyun rolls his eyes. “I’m sure Jungkook would be more than happy to take your treats instead.”

“Stop being a no-show at our hangouts and have fun for once. I swear you’re always cooped up in your apartment.” Eunwoo raises an eyebrow at him.

“I agree. Please take him out of the apartment for me. It’s so difficult. It’s not an easy one-man job.” You sigh, following Jungwoo to an empty booth.

Jaehyun and Eunwoo break out into smiles and follow suit. The four of you sit in one booth and one of the cashier employees drops by with the menu. 

“Is there anything in particular that you have in mind? Ideas? Suggestions?” 

“Clara has quite a sweet tooth. She really loves red velvet cakes.” Jungwoo starts off.

Eunwoo hums. “I guess we can start from there. I’ll bring some slices of different cakes and you can taste them, see if you like them, and then we can choose your top three.”

“Am I missing something between the two of you?” Jaehyun asks you once Eunwoo heads to the back of the kitchen to fetch several slices of different cakes. 

You raise an eyebrow. “No?”

“You and Eunwoo seem oddly close. He told me that he has a new girlfriend.” He shrugs his shoulders. 

Jungwoo kicks your foot underneath the table and you have to bite your lip to contain the painful yelp threatening to come out. You send him a death glare. 

“We’re not dating.” You laugh and the serious look on his face surprises you. “Wait, did you think his new girlfriend was me?”

“If I didn’t know you or Eunwoo, I would’ve been convinced enough to think that the two of you were dating.” Jaehyun mumbles.

Jungwoo’s eyebrows raise and he turns to face you. You look at him questioningly. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Didn’t Eunwoo have the biggest crush on you—”

“Here are the samples.”

Your mouths clamp shut when Eunwoo arrives with a tray filled with several slices of cake. You and Jaehyun meet eyes and he squints them at you. 

“These are all the red velvet cakes we serve.” Eunwoo explains. Sitting on the table are a variety of red velvet cakes, it’s almost difficult to find a difference between each one. 

“They all look the same.” Jaehyun chuckles. 

“Shall we start cake tasting?”

Everyone glances at Jungwoo and he smiles sheepishly. 

“Let’s dig in.”

As the three of you dig into the first slice of a red velvet cake, Jaehyun finds himself glancing at you as you take a bite. Unknowingly, you get some of the cream cheese icing on the side of your mouth. He feels a sudden urge to reach out and wipe it off for you. He decides not to, and instead, kicks your foot underneath the table. You jump in your seat, looking up and your eyes meet Jaehyun’s. He points at the corner of his mouth.

“You have icing,” he mumbles and your eyes slightly widen. You wipe the side of your mouth and he chuckles. You look quite endearing and adorable right now. “No, you missed it.”

“I did?” You pout, wiping your mouth again until Jaehyun gives up.

He reaches over from across the table and wipes the icing off the side of your mouth with his thumb. Your doe-eyes look into his. Did your heart just skip a beat? You’ve never felt your heart beat this fast. You’ve never seen Jaehyun up this close. His face is so close to yours that you could count his eyelashes. 

“You could’ve just given her a napkin to wipe it off.”

The two of you tear away from each other like two repelling magnets. You look at Jungwoo, completely in a daze. His eyes dart between the two of you and a grin slowly spreads across his lips. Jaehyun, however, looks unbothered. 

The cake tasting session takes up two hours of your afternoon and ends up with Jungwoo choosing three distinct red velvet cakes. The wedding cake will be a three-tier red velvet cake, with each tier being one of the three cakes Jungwoo chose, respectively. And just as Eunwoo promised, Jungwoo got a discount for the wedding cake. 

The three of you are metres away from the bake shop when you hear your name being called out from behind. When you look over your shoulder, you find Eunwoo jogging up to you with a small cake box in his arms. 

“Y/N!”

“Eunwoo, slow down before you fall on your face.”

He catches up to you and grabs your hands to place the small box onto them. You quirk an eyebrow. 

“It’s for your mother. We made too many batches of strawberry shortcakes.” 

You smile. “You really didn’t need to, but thanks.”

Jaehyun watches you beam at Eunwoo. He barely notices the unsettling feeling in his gut at the sight of the two of you. Jungwoo’s in the middle of answering a phone call. 

“Today?” Jungwoo’s flustered. He scratches the back of his neck. “Yeah—Well—we can probably make it on time, I guess. You’re open until six?”

Eunwoo bids a farewell and jogs back to his bake shop. Jaehyun looks at you suspiciously as you look back at him with a questioning look. Jungwoo clasps his hands together. 

“I guess we’re making a trip to the flower shop. Their client booked for today cancelled last minute and offered to meet with us instead.”

You and Jaehyun share a look. Jaehyun has a growing hatred for flowers and going to the flower shop would be his biggest nightmare. Jaehyun looks nervous but he covers it up with a small smile. 

“Let’s get going then. We wouldn’t want them waiting, right?” Jaehyun insists. 

“What—Jaehyun—” He cuts you off with a look that tells you that he’ll be just fine. You frown, watching him follow Jungwoo to his car. 

Jaehyun looks over his shoulder. “Are you coming or not?”

He doesn’t want to be here. Clearly. It’s evident through the intense staring contest he’s having with the shop’s lit up sign, Lina’s Blooming Flowers. This is his biggest fear and nightmare. Stepping foot inside the flower shop would be major character development for him. It’s similar to the feeling of stepping on the edge of a cliff and counting down before bungee jumping. Nervousness and anxiousness is etched all over his face.

For a brief moment, his nervousness fades away when he feels your hand being placed on his shoulder. You give his shoulder one reassuring squeeze. He glances at you and you give him an encouraging smile.

“We made it just in time with an hour to spare before their closing time!” Jungwoo says excitedly. 

The last time Jaehyun stepped foot inside a flower shop was when he bought his mother flowers for Mother’s Day. At the time, he wasn’t aware of the disease he had. He vividly remembers the scent of fresh lavender and hyacinth. Back then, the fragrant smell of flowers brought him warmth and a sense of rebirth or renewal. Now, just a whiff of flowers makes him nauseous. 

As the three of you enter the shop, you can hear Jaehyun let out a breath that he’s been holding in for heaven knows how long. Standing at the front desk is a woman around your age, wrapping a bouquet of flowers in plastic wrap. It’s an assortment of white and red roses. Red roses. It’s the flower that Jaehyun has grown to hate because they remind him of her. You feel yourself wince and shrivel up, trying to think of ways to distract Jaehyun from seeing the roses. But it’s too late when she catches everyone’s attention with a gasp of panic. Jaehyun stares at the bouquet of roses and feels his lungs start to clog up just at the sight of them. The florist is quickly finishing her job before approaching the three of you.

“Jungwoo, right?” She asks.

Jaehyun snaps out of his gaze and looks at the woman walking towards the three of you. His eyebrows raise. 

“Yes! That’s me.” 

“Great! Sorry for the wait,” she apologizes sheepishly. “I’m Lina, the florist of this shop.”

As she shakes each one of your hands, she extends her hand out to Jaehyun and he looks at her in complete daze. She giggles when Jaehyun is brought back to reality, finally shaking her hand. She tucks a strand of hair behind her ear and you don’t fail to notice how red Jaehyun’s ears are. This is the first time Jaehyun’s heart skipped a beat since his last breakup. He earns another nudge from you.

“Are you okay?” You mouth at him and he nods his head.

He’s surprised. It’s the first time he forgot about his hatred and fear for flowers, even if it was just for a brief moment. 

And it’s all because of a beautiful florist. 

“Let’s get started with the colour scheme.” Lina suggests, guiding everyone to the front desk. She pulls out a book filled with many colour schemes and hands it to Jungwoo. She smiles at you and says, “Is there anything you had in mind for your wedding?”

You break out into a chuckle. “Oh, no, I think you got it all wrong—I’m not, no—me? No. I’m not the fiancé. I’m just a—”

“She’s my wedding planner.” Jungwoo cuts you off and points at Jaehyun. “He’s my wedding planner too.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry!” She exclaims. “I had no idea. It’s my fault for making such assumptions.”

You wave it off. “It’s alright. No worries.”

She laughs nervously. “Shall we continue choosing the colour scheme?”

Jungwoo’s busy skimming through the book and having a FaceTime call with his pregnant fiancé to pick the colour scheme together. Jaehyun’s eyes scan the shop, looking at all the different types of flowers. He spots the peonies placed in metal vases along with roses of different colours. He could probably run a flower shop himself if he fully overcame his hatred and fear of flowers, all because he knows every single kind of flower that exists. 

It seems promising. 

“Have you been here before?” He hears someone ask and he turns around. It’s Lina. 

“Maybe once when I was younger.” He replies. 

“Oh, I see.” She purses her lips into a tight line. “You look familiar. Did you come to the shop with your grandmother, perhaps? On Mother’s Day?”

His mouth forms into an ‘o’ shape. “Yes, I have.”

“No wonder!” She exclaims. “So you’re the little boy I wanted to befriend when I helped my mother run the shop.”

“So, we’ve met?” Jaehyun scratches the back of his neck and she nods vigorously. 

He tries to dig through his memories to try and remember Lina. It takes a while until he squints his eyes at the familiar set freckles on her cheeks and her light brown eyes. He lets out a soft gasp. 

“You’re the little girl I accidentally bumped into!” 

“And you made me spill all the water from the watering can!”

Soft laughter can be heard from the front desk. It breaks your focus on helping Jungwoo with the colour scheme. You look over your shoulder to find Jaehyun laughing along with the florist, Lina. They seem to be very engaged in their conversation. Jaehyun looks… happy. There’s not a single wave of nervousness or anxiousness on his face or in his gestures. It makes a wide smile form on your lips. 

But why do you feel a little bit left out? Why do you feel like you’re missing out? Why do you feel slightly jealous that someone else is putting a smile on Jaehyun’s face? Is it wrong to feel jealous?

“Y/N.”

Your head snaps in Jungwoo’s direction and he looks at you with concern. You barely realize that your eyebrows were furrowed the entire time until you feel your face soften. “Yeah?”

“Everything alright?” He asks. “I asked you the same question four times and you didn’t answer.”

“O-Oh, were you? Sorry, I was just—what were you saying?”

It was a huge relief for Jungwoo and Clara when they realized that they didn’t need to hire a photographer. It just so happened that you, their wedding planner slash best friend, has a huge knack for photography. Thus, the engaged couple will not need to worry about the expenses. 

“This is sick.” Jaehyun utters out when Jungwoo pulls up to the photo shooting location. 

You look out the window. Jungwoo and Clara decided to have their prenuptial photos taken at a location where they had their first date. It’s extremely romantic. They had their first date out on a large field of sunflowers. Sunflowers are scattered across the field, along with some grass patches where couples and families would have a small picnic. 

The first thing you notice is how Jaehyun pays no mind to the sunflowers ahead of him. He’s looking at them with his two eyes and not a single reaction is coming out of him. That is, until he breaks out into a smile. 

You tilt your head in confusion. Huh?

Jaehyun’s taking some photos on his phone. “I should send these to Lina. I think she’ll love it.”

You raise an eyebrow. You grin. “You seem to be getting very close with Lina.”

He blushes. “We are. I actually asked her to hang out with me this Friday.”

“Look at you!” You exclaim with a teasing grin. “Since when were you picking up girls without telling me?”

“I was going to tell you today.” He laughs and it dies down when he thinks of something. “You know, I have a great feeling that she may be the one.”

The one? Your smile slightly falters. Of the five times that Jaehyun told you that the woman he has fallen in love with could be the one, you’ve always been extremely happy and supportive. But why was it that this time around, you didn’t feel as happy? 

“Let’s get started with the shoot! I found the perfect place!” Clara says. 

“R-Right!” You exclaim, grabbing Jaehyun’s arm. The two of you jog to catch up with the engaged couple. 

As you reach the spot, Jungwoo and Clara do some quick fix ups on each other. You’re busy setting up the equipment and Jaehyun’s in the midst of having a phone call with Lina. Every now and then, you find yourself trying to sneak a glance at Jaehyun, only to see him smiling so wide that his dimples were showing. 

Suddenly, you feel a sharp pain in your lungs. Your tripod collapses onto the grass as you gasp for some air. Clara notices and immediately rushes over to you. You’re still trying to catch your breath. You feel as if you’ve run a marathon. Your breathing is low and deep. Your throat feels like it’s on fire. 

“Y/N?” You hear Jaehyun ask as he heads towards you. “Everything alright? What happened?”

Clara is handing you a bottle of water. You pry the cap open and chug half of the bottle down. You gasp for air and start a small coughing fit. “Do I need to call an ambulance? Y/N, you’re getting pale. Have you been feeling unwell since this morning?”

Your legs feel like jello and they give out, sending you to the grass. You clench your eyes shut and you could barely answer their concerns. It takes you a couple of minutes to get back to normal. 

“Y/N, look at me.”

Clara is forcing you to face her when she cups your cheeks with her hands. Jungwoo is in complete shock, not saying a single word. Jaehyun looks extremely concerned for you. 

“I’m okay. I think it’s because I skipped breakfast this morning.” You say as you finally catch your breath. 

The pain in your lungs goes away instantly. You’ve finally gained power to stand up again. You’re not sure what happened to you because you’ve never experienced this in your life. 

“Are you sure? It didn’t look like it.” Jungwoo bites his lip nervously. 

“I’ll be fine.” You reassure them. “Let’s get on with the shoot.”

After five minutes of them protesting you to go home and get rested, they finally give in to your stubbornness and decide to finish up the photoshoot. 

The photos come out beautifully. There are photos of Jungwoo and Clara running through the field of sunflowers. There are single shots of Clara caressing her baby bump with one hand and holding a sunflower in the other. There are solo shots of Jungwoo hiding behind sunflowers and popping out from behind it. 

“You should really start a photography business.”

You look over your shoulder to see Clara. She’s looking at the photos you’ve taken through the viewfinder. 

“Should I?” You ask and she nods. 

“You’re very talented, Y/N. I know a couple of photographers who run their own businesses. I could hook you up.” She winks at you. 

“I don’t know, I have a lot of things I want to accomplish.” You say, feeling unsure. 

“You should give it a try. You never know what the future has in store for you.”

“He said he’ll be running late.”

You tell Jungwoo as you catch up to him. The three of you were supposed to go venue-hunting for reception. However, ever since the three of you visited the flower shop, Jaehyun had started to bail out on the wedding plans. You couldn’t blame him, he probably needed time off to himself after spending a whole afternoon with flowers. But what threw you off was the sound of feminine laughter when he had called you to notify that he’d be running late.

“Late?” You nod. “Weird.”

“It’s alright. We can do it without him.” You reassure the soon-to-be groom. 

The two of you arrive at the first venue. It’s a reception hall for roughly a thousand guests. It’s huge and spacious. Your eyes scan through the venue and you immediately spot the huge chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. You frown.

“I don’t think Clara will like it,” you say as you point up at the chandeliers. “Doesn’t she hate grand decorations like chandeliers?”

Jungwoo hums in agreement. “Shall we get going to the next venue?”

You nod and head towards the owner of the reception hall. You fake a smile. 

“We’ll get back to you if we’re interested in renting out the space.” You insist and the owner agrees. “Thank you for your time.”

The second venue is everything it promised to be. You stare at the venue in awe. If you were to ever get married, this was the venue you’d choose. It’s a venue where modern meets boho. Instead of chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, there are potted plants and flowers with fairy lights wrapped around them. The chairs are wooden and the tables are long enough for roughly ten guests. On both sides of the room, there are large windows overlooking a field of flowers. 

“Clara would love this venue,” Jungwoo says in awe. 

You nod in agreement. “I think so too.”

You hear the owner greet customers and you turn around to see Jaehyun arriving with… Lina? You and Jungwoo share a look. 

“Sorry for running late,” Jaehyun apologizes. 

Lina smiles sheepishly. “I’m so sorry for tagging along. I hope it’s alright with you, Jungwoo.”

Jungwoo lets out an uneasy chuckle. “Yeah, no worries. You are the florist for our wedding, how can I say no to you?”

The owner approaches the four of you. “I’m assuming the two of you are also looking for a venue for your wedding?”

Jaehyun and Lina stare at each other before blushing. You feel your eyes squint in suspicion. Jungwoo feels confused. Since when were these two close? Did something happen between the two of them? 

“We’re not getting married.” Lina shakes her head. “We’re just friends, right, Jaehyun?”

“Yeah, we’re just best friends.” Jaehyun tells the owner.

You stop yourself from scoffing. Best friends? Since when were they best friends? They clearly just met a couple of days ago and now they’ve upgraded to best friends from being strangers? 

Jungwoo nudges you. You snap out of it. “Let’s just keep this venue on the list and move onto the last one, alright?”

Why are you looking into it too much? 

“S-Sure.” You mutter.

You never consider yourself hot-headed. But this is the first time you’ve ever felt your blood boil and your blood pressure shoot up. Jungwoo hops into the driver’s seat. You decide to sit in the front passenger’s seat, looking at the rearview mirror to see Jaehyun and Lina hop in the back. They’re sitting awfully close to each other, with their shoulders brushing. You huff out a breath, looking away and distracting yourself with the clouds in the sky. 

Jungwoo tears his gaze from the road and glances at you. A soft smile spreads across his lips when he sees you mumbling to yourself. To you, you don’t think it’s obvious. But to Jungwoo, he can see how jealous you are over the two lovebirds sitting in the back of his car. He looks in his rearview mirror to see Jaehyun holding Lina’s hand.

He sighs.

“Today’s going to be a long day.”

“Of all the times Jaehyun bails out, he decides to bail out on the suit fitting too?”

Jungwoo’s standing in front of the mirror, fixing his tie. One of the tailors, Jungkook, who’s a close friend of Jaehyun’s, is standing right behind him with a rack filled with other suits. You sigh, shrugging your shoulders. There’s nothing much you could do. You could scold Jaehyun for being such a slacker, but you decide not to. 

“The grey looks great on you,” Jungkook compliments Jungwoo. “I’m wearing a grey suit to my wedding too.”

“You’re getting married?” You blurt out and Jungkook chuckles.

“I’m surprised you haven’t gotten your invitation yet.” He mumbles. “It should be coming in the mail in the next couple of days. My fiance and I just mailed them out last Friday.”

“I got my invitation.” Jungwoo adds. “I guess we’re all getting quite old since I’m attending weddings left and right.”

Jungkook smirks. “I bet Jaehyun’s going to be next.”

Your ears perk up in curiosity. Jungwoo looks at you through the reflection in the mirror. As he studies your reaction, Jungkook helps button up the ends of his sleeves.

“Jaehyun?” You ask.

“Yeah, at the rate, him and that florist will end up together.” Jungkook shrugs his shoulders. 

You frown but you try to cover it up with a smile. “Cute.”

“They’ve been hanging out a lot recently,” he adds, fixing up Jungwoo’s collar. He dusts off his shoulders and turns back around to look at Jungwoo’s reflection in the mirror. “I think the reason why he bailed out on you guys today is because they’re going to an amusement park.”

Jungwoo furrows his eyebrows. “He bailed out on this for a day at the amusement park?”

“Don’t tell him I told you.” Jungkook warns him. “If he ever finds out, he’ll have me dead.”

Jungwoo glances at you and you try to avoid fuming in anger. Who would’ve thought that Jaehyun would choose a woman he barely knows, over his own best friend who’s getting married in a couple of months? There’s disappointment written all over Jungwoo’s face and it fails to remain hidden. Jungkook, on the other hand, feels like he has just ruined the entire atmosphere and decides to give Jungwoo a discount on his suit in compensation.

As Jungwoo’s paying for his suit, you’re scrolling through your social networking account and right when Jungkook’s cashier machine lets out a soft ‘ding!’, you find Jaehyun’s new post. 

And indeed, it’s a picture of him and Lina at the amusement park.

Why do you feel sad? Why do you wish that it was you instead of her? Why do you always feel like you’re missing out whenever he’s with her? Why is he spending more time with her and less time with you?

Why do you feel this way?

You’ll never know.

Clara looks stunning in her wedding dress. You stare at her in awe as the tailor is zipping up the dress for her. Her baby bump is starting to show underneath her dress. You’re too distracted by her beauty to notice that Jaehyun and Lina are entering into the shop. 

Clara’s gaze tears away from you as she spots Jaehyun and Lina. She furrows her eyebrows in confusion. “Jaehyun, you came?”

Jaehyun nods. “Jungwoo told me to accompany you. You know him, he believes in that stupid superstition.”

She waves at Lina. “I’m guessing you’re Lina?”

“Yes, you guessed right.” Lina giggles and tucks a strand of hair behind her ear. It’s probably a mannerism of hers whenever the attention is on her, you note. 

“How do you like the dress, ma’am?” The tailor asks the bride-to-be.

“It’s nice, I think I might take this one. I’m not really particular with the dress.” She replies and an idea pops into her head. “Do you perhaps have any bridesmaid dresses ready for fitting?”

“Yes, we do. Do you want to start with the fitting for the bridesmaids?” The tailor questions.

“Yes. I want my maid of honour to pick out a dress—”

“Clara,” you look at her with surprise. “I literally just ate a hamburger, I feel bloated—”

“Stop overreacting and put a dress on. You look fine. You look beautiful.” She cuts you off. “Besides, we’re already here.”

“Fine.” You sigh with defeat, following the tailor into the back of the shop to pick out some dresses.

The dresses come in different colours. The couple plan on having the plain grey and white colour scheme. Your eyes scan the selection before you point out at two different dresses. The tailor looks at you and flashes a smile.

“You have a great eye for dresses, ma’am.” She compliments you and you chuckle.

“I guess being a wedding planner was a good idea.” You muse.

The first dress you put on is an elegant dress that reaches the floor. It’s strapless and has a long slit on the side, revealing your leg. As you look at yourself in the mirror, you bite your lip. You’ve never seen yourself dressed up like this.

“Let me see!” Clara exclaims.

As you walk out of the fitting room, your eyes meet Clara’s. She looks at you like she sees a ghost. You begin to panic.

“What? It looks bad?” You frown.

“No, you look,” she begins. “You look beautiful, Y/N.”

“T-Thanks?” You let out an uneasy laugh.

“You really look beautiful, Y/N.” Lina adds and you’re not sure what to say. 

You look at Jaehyun, who’s too busy texting someone on his phone. He remains unbothered and uninterested. Somehow, you have the urge to make him look at you. 

“Shall we try on the next dress?”

You snap out of your thoughts, looking at the tailor. “Sure.”

As you’re putting on the second dress, the tailor is helping you zip up at the back. The dress is a mermaid dress. It shows your curves at your hips and while the dress is off-shoulder, it reveals your collarbones, perfect for stacking necklaces. 

“How do I look?” You ask as you step out of the fitting room.

Jaehyun looks up from his phone when he hears Lina and Clara let out a gasp. The moment his eyes are on you, his eyebrows raise. You look stunning, it’s almost effortless. Your hair is put up in a messy low bun with strands of your hair framing your face. The last time he saw you dressed up like this was prom night. Time slows down for him and it feels like it’s just the two of you in the room. You’re laughing over a joke Clara probably said, but he finds himself getting lost in a trance by your beauty. 

“Jaehyun?” 

He snaps out of his trance to see Lina nudging him. He glances at her and she points at one of the dresses hung up on the rack. “Hm?”

“I was just telling you how that dress could look so beautiful on Y/N. What do you think?” Lina asks.

Jaehyun shakes his head. “No, I think the dress she has on is the one.”

“Really?” He hears you say. Both of your eyes meet.

He slowly nods his head, almost falling into another trance.

“It looks perfect.”

May 2nd. 

“I tried creating your wedding cake yesterday and this is how it turned out.”

You’re too busy looking out the window. The cherry blossoms have finally bloomed and there’s a plethora of couples out on dates. Eunwoo and Jungwoo’s chatter is drowned out by your thoughts and the sight of a young couple taking a selfie in front of a cherry blossom tree. There’s a small smile on your lips but it drops from your face when you’re reminded of Jaehyun. 

“Y/N?”

You slowly turn around. Eunwoo is asking you to join them in the kitchen. You push yourself off the window sill to join them. 

Jungwoo frowns. “Where’s Jaehyun? Did he bail out on us again?”

You nod. “Unfortunately. He said he wanted to take a day off from the planning.”

He scoffs. “A day off? There was never a day where he was with us.”

The three of you are cutting yourselves a slice of the wedding cake. Eunwoo can’t help but notice how quiet you’ve been since you entered the bakery shop. Your mind is flooded with thoughts that you can’t seem to explain or describe. They’re thoughts only you can understand. 

Eunwoo gets a phone call. “Excuse me, I have to take a phone call. Please go ahead and taste the cake.”

Eunwoo leaves the two of you in the back kitchen with a three-tier wedding cake. You’re poking your slice of cake with a fork and Jungwoo nudges you. 

“Is everything alright? You’ve been quiet all morning.”

You smile. “I’m alright. I guess I’m just a bit tired.”

“It doesn’t seem like it.”

You sigh. “Is it that obvious?”

“Very obvious,” he mumbles and tilts his head. “Did anything bad happen between you and Jaehyun?”

“What? No.” You answer. “Why? Does it look like it?”

Lately, Jungwoo’s been noticing a lot of things. He’s been noticing how whiny and angry you get whenever Jaehyun bails out on the two of you. He’s seen the longing stares you have whenever Jaehyun is around. He sees how nervous you get whenever you’re around Jaehyun because of the ridiculous amount of times you’ve fiddled with your fingers. You’re jealous and you don’t even know it.

He sees himself in you. The last time he’s been like this was when he first fell in love with his fiance.

“Y/N, can I ask you something?”

“Jungwoo, I need your help.”

The both of you look at each other and laugh. He takes a bite of his cake. “Oh, this is delicious! Anyways, you go first.”

“How do you know if you’re in love with someone?”

He chokes on his cake. You pat his back and offer him a glass of water. “Sorry, repeat that for me.”

“How do you know if you’re in love with someone?” You ask again. “I’ve never been in love before, so I figured you would be the perfect person to ask.”

“It depends.” He starts off explaining.

“How so?” You mumble. 

“It’s different for every person. When I fell in love with Clara, I always felt happy around her. I’d always find myself putting in more effort. I’d find myself thinking about her even though I shouldn’t be, I’d wonder if she had eaten her meals, if she’s getting enough sleep. But I knew that I was falling in love with her when she started liking someone else. I figured that I would shoot my shot whether she liked me or not because I felt that I owed it to myself.”

You smile. “And all this time, she was in love with you.”

He nods his head with a warm smile. He wiggles his eyebrows. “Have you been feeling that way?”

You’ve always felt happy around Jaehyun. You and Jaehyun are like two peas in a pod. You’re both stuck together like glue. He makes you a better person everyday. You can’t imagine your life without him. 

You’ve always been putting in more effort. When Jaehyun got his heart broken five times, you’ve always been there. You chose to stay. 

Lately, Jaehyun has been on your mind more than usual. Ever since he started bailing out on helping Jungwoo plan his wedding, you’ve been wondering if he’s doing alright or if there’s anything wrong. Ever since he started hanging out with Lina, you’ve been wondering if she’s been treating him out for his favourite ice cream or if he’s been eating his meals with her. Sometimes, Jaehyun would make you worry and all it took for those worries to go away was one phone call or text from him. 

But maybe you’re falling in love with Jaehyun. Ever since he started showing interest in Lina, it was slowly starting to make you realize that you too, have feelings and you too, can fall in love. You’ve been comparing yourself to Lina. You’ve been craving to hold Jaehyun’s hand. Whenever he smiles at you, it’s like the whole world stops and you’re not sure how to act. You feel shy around him, which is unusual for you. You’re never shy around your best friend. 

But I knew that I was falling in love with her when she started liking someone else. 

“Holy shit.”

You’re in love with Jaehyun. You’ve been in denial about your feelings for him this entire time. You’re in love with your best friend, Jaehyun. 

“Language!” Jungwoo scolds you. 

I figured that I would shoot my shot whether she liked me or not because I felt that I owed it to myself.

“I have to go.”

Jungwoo watches you scramble for your things. You’re in a rush. As you leave the kitchen, Jungwoo can’t help but smile. He knows. He knows that you’re in love with Jaehyun. You don’t need to tell him because he sees it. 

“I’m just a couple blocks down from the cafe, the driver can park in front of the bakery—Y/N?”

“I have to go! Let me know how it goes!”

Eunwoo looks at you bewilderedly as you wave at him. You’re running down the street with your purse barely slung over your shoulder. He tilts his head in confusion. 

“Where is she going?”

Jungwoo steps out of the bakery and places his hand on Eunwoo’s shoulder. 

“She’s going to shoot her shot.”

As you reach the bus stop, you see a bus loading on passengers. You let out a groan and sprint to the bus, hoping to get on it. Fortunately, you hopped onto the bus, completely out of breath. Pulling out your phone, you dial Jaehyun’s phone number. 

“Hello? Y/N?” You hear Jaehyun’s voice after a couple of rings. 

“Jaehyun!” You greet him. “Where are you? I need to tell you something.”

“Perfect timing! I have something to tell you too.” 

“Let’s meet at the pier, where the cherry blossoms bloomed.” You suggest and you can hear him smile on the other line. 

“Perfect. I’m almost there. I’ll see you!” He chuckles. 

“I’ll see you.”

A couple of minutes pass and you look out the window to see cherry blossom trees. The bus halts to a stop and you rush out, walking fast in search of your best friend. It’s a difficult search because there are too many couples roaming the pier. Just as you’re about to give up and call Jaehyun—

“Y/N!”

You look to your right to see Jaehyun jogging towards you. As the two of you meet halfway, you timidly wave at him. He looks so beautiful with the cherry blossoms behind him. You find yourself staring in awe. 

“What was it that you needed to tell me?” You both ask in unison. 

“You go first.” You insist. 

“Are you sure?” You laugh, playfully hitting his arm. 

“Go first.” 

He bites his lip, a smile threatening to spread across his lips. He looks nervous. His dimples are showing. His ears are extremely red. You feel your heart skip a beat too many. Your heart is beating so fast that you’re afraid he can hear it. 

“I asked Lina to be my girlfriend and she said yes!”

Your smile threatens to fade away. But you don’t even dare let it fall off your face, no matter how shattered your heart is. It’s fascinating how Jaehyun can make your heart beat faster than normal and shatter it into pieces in one day. You’re not sure if you’re happy for him or sad that you just got rejected. 

“O-Oh! That’s—That’s great! Con—Congratulations!” 

Jaehyun notices that your eyes are glassy. He pays no attention to it when you pull him into a tight embrace. You rest your head on his shoulder, blinking away the tears threatening to form in your eyes. He pulls away from the hug. 

“What did you want to tell me?” 

You look up at him. “Oh. It’s nothing. It’s not that important anymore—”

“What? No, you’re lying—”

“Well, I’ve been thinking about starting a photography business. Clara managed to convince me. She might help run it with me.” You tell a white lie. 

“Really?! I’m so proud of you!” He exclaims and pulls you back into another hug. 

You find yourself hugging Jaehyun tighter. It might be because this may be the last time you could hug him. He belongs to someone else now. Your chance is gone. You wish you could blame yourself for being a little too late, but you’re too busy drowning in your sadness. 

A little too late. 

Just a little. 

And you hate being late. 

That night, you find yourself sitting in your bathroom. Hugging your knees to your chest, you let out a soft sob. The fear and vulnerability you feel is that of like a huge bucket of ice cold water being poured on you. Scattered around the bathroom floor are cherry blossom petals. You glance at your camera that’s still turned on, with a candid photo of Jaehyun focused on the viewfinder. 

Everything was starting to make sense. 

From your nauseous episodes to your shortness of breath, it led up to this. Everything feels numb. All you can remember is Jaehyun’s dimply smile and the beautiful cherry blossom trees behind him. You never thought it would come to this. 

In the toilet are cherry blossom petals. You manage to gather yourself and you slowly get up to flush the toilet. You watch all the cherry blossom petals go down the toilet. 

Jaehyun loves cherry blossoms. 

The more you stare at the cherry blossom petals that you’ve thrown up, the more you start to hate them. You’re starting to hate them because it reminds you of your heartbreak, it’s a sign of rejection, and it tells you one thing; Jaehyun’s not in love with you. 

“The invitations came out beautifully!”

You tell Jungwoo who lets out a soft chuckle as you’re showing him your invitation that you had just gotten from your mailbox. He flashes two thumbs up through your laptop screen. Behind him, you spot Clara taking pictures of their newly renovated baby room. 

“Have you heard from Jaehyun, lately? I haven’t seen him since we all met up to finalize the invitations.” 

You ponder on whether you should pretend to have mistakenly hung up on the video call, but you know that Jungwoo wouldn’t buy such a lie. You gnaw on your lip, thinking of an answer to tell him. 

You give up. You shake your head. “I’m sure he’s busy with Lina. They’re dating now.”

“What?” Clara yells, disregarding her photo taking session to join in the conversation. You chuckle lightheartedly. Jungwoo furrows his eyebrows in confusion. “He has a girlfriend now? And it’s not you?”

“Did you want it to be me?” 

“Uh, yes?” Clara answers. She frowns. “Is that why you’ve been looking down lately?”

“Have I?” The couple share a look and nod in reply. It’s true. You’ve been feeling down because of the heartbreak, but you can’t help it. You’ve learned that when you fall in love with someone, you fall hard. However, you’re never ready for the heartbreak. 

“Your crush on Jaehyun is quite obvious, Y/N.” Jungwoo points out. “It just took you longer to realize it.”

“I’m happy for him,” you muster up a smile. “This just means that it isn’t meant to be.”

You’re not meant to be together. You know it from the cherry blossoms that you flush down the toilet. You know it from the sharp pain in your lungs and the breathing attack you have because of it. You know it from how distant Jaehyun has been. You know it because of her.

You won’t ever blame it on her because you have come to the conclusion that you’re not meant for Jaehyun. The cherry blossoms are a sign for you to move on.

“Well, I think you and Jaehyun are perfect for each other.” Clara attempts at convincing you but you barely buy it. “You guys are like two peas in a pod. I can’t see one of you without the other.”

You flash a small smile. Your smile doesn’t reach your eyes and you know that the couple can see how fake your smile is through their laptop screen. 

“He has Lina now. I think that’s what matters. He doesn’t need me anymore.”

“Are you even listening to yourself—”

There’s a knock at the door, interrupting your conversation. You’re not expecting any guests at the hour and you don’t have any packages arriving until tomorrow. As you excuse yourself, you shuffle towards the door to look through the peephole. Standing on the other side of the door is a tall guy, holding up a box in front of his face. You giggle.

“Cha Eunwoo! What are you doing here?”

He moves the box away from his face and beams at you. 

“I decided to pay you a visit! It’s been quite a while since I’ve come over, huh?”

“It feels quite odd having you over.”

Eunwoo quirks an eyebrow. He’s cutting two slices of chocolate cake, one for you and the other for him. Standing right next to him, you pour two glasses of wine for the both of you. 

“What do you mean?” He laughs. 

“You never come over.” You shrug your shoulders. “When you do come over, it’s usually because you’re having girl problems.”

He scoffs. “I do not have girl problems—”

“You do.” You cut him off, looking up at him with a grin. He squints his eyes at you. 

“Now you make it seem like I have this huge issue when it comes to girls and my dating life—”

You stifle a giggle. “But it’s true, though.”

He frowns. “Is it really?”

You nod your head. “Sadly.”

The coffee table is set up lazily with Eunwoo’s cake that he had made for the two of you, along with a bottle of wine that you’ve barely touched since receiving it as a birthday gift. A movie is playing softly in the background as you and Eunwoo catch up with each other’s lives. 

“Have you seen Jaehyun, lately?”

“No. I figured he’d be busy helping out with Jungwoo’s wedding.” Eunwoo replies. “Is he not helping out?”

“Ever since he started dating Lina, he hasn’t been showing up. It’s only been me helping Jungwoo plan out his wedding.” You explain. 

“He’s dating? Since when?”

“Not sure. I haven’t seen him.” You swirl your wine in your glass before taking a huge sip. 

“Shouldn’t you know? I mean, you’re his best friend, his partner in crime. If there was someone who knew him most, it would be you.” He takes a bite of his slice of cake. 

“Surprise?” You chuckle. “I don’t know anything about his current relationship. Sorry to disappoint.”

You start to feel slightly dizzy. You’re not sure if it’s the wine or if you’re experiencing the same symptoms. Within a couple of minutes, your head starts to pound. Eunwoo takes notice of how quiet you’ve gotten, staring at you to make sure everything is alright. You grab your forehead, eyebrows knitting together as your head continues to pound. You feel weak. Seconds later, your lungs start to tighten and your breathing slows down. 

“Y/N. Are you alright?” He asks. 

You try to look up at him but your head feels heavy. You nod your head but he doesn’t believe it. 

“Excuse me,” you whisper as you struggle to get onto your feet. 

The symptoms are showing up again. You’re stumbling on your way to the bathroom. Your lungs feel full, causing you to have trouble breathing. As soon as you reach your bathroom, you bend over the toilet. 

You spend fifteen minutes throwing up cherry blossom petals into the toilet. You’ve been too distracted by your condition to notice that you’ve left the bathroom door open. Eunwoo rushes over to the bathroom and stops in his tracks. 

His eyebrows raise in surprise. What he sees in front of him is all too familiar. Scattered around the floor are petals of a cherry blossom. His eyes travel towards you. You’re bent over the toilet, throwing up petals. He feels his blood run cold. 

“Y/N.”

You cough, sighing with relief. Your lungs finally empty out again. Your headache vanishes. As you lean your restless figure against the wall, you look up to see Eunwoo standing at the doorway. He’s just as surprised as you are. 

He gestures at the petals. “They look… beautiful.”

You fake a smile. 

“But Y/N, my mother went through the same thing.” He confesses. “This all reminds me of her. Instead of the cherry blossoms, she had stargazer lilies.”

“Those must’ve been beautiful,” you mumble. 

He takes a seat next to you. “Who would’ve thought that something so precious, so beautiful, would end up looking like this?”

You fiddle with your fingers. “Eunwoo, can you promise me something?”

“Of course.”

“Don’t tell anyone about this. Not even Jaehyun.” You beg. “He can’t find out.”

The dots were connecting in his head. If you didn’t want Jaehyun to find out about this, this only meant one thing. 

“This is all because of Jaehyun?” His eyes round in shock and you slowly nod your head. He picks up a petal from the floor and analyzes it. 

“Promise me, Eunwoo. Please.”

He tears his gaze from the petal to look at you. Your eyes are filled with sadness. 

“I promise, only if you promise to do something in return.” He insists. 

“What do you want me to do?” 

He places his hand on top of yours. “Please get yourself checked. I’m afraid you have the same condition as my mother.”

You nod. 

“I promise.”

Later that night, Eunwoo helps you book an appointment with a doctor at the local hospital. You can’t help but appreciate the effort Eunwoo has been giving. During the times where you have been going through a lot, you would have expected Jaehyun to be there for you, just like how you were there for him. But t times where you needed Jaehyun the most, he was nowhere to be found. Instead, Eunwoo has been the one who stuck around. 

You can’t help but think that being apart from Jaehyun may be nothing but for the better. 

The first thing you do once you step out of the Doctor’s office is let out the longest, tiring sigh. The next thing you do is stare at a short list of prescribed medications. You let out yet another tiring sigh. Falling in love should be a paid job if it’s getting you all worked up for heartbreak. 

“Y/N?”

It takes you a couple of seconds to realize that your name is being called. The soft voice calling out your name snaps you out of your trance. Standing a couple of metres away is Clara, who looks surprised to see you in the hospital. She looks at the small Doctor’s note with your medications in your hand and slowly looks up at you. Behind you, she reads the sign on your Doctor’s office door. Disease Specialist. When your eyes meet, her gaze transforms from curiosity to concern.

“C-Clara, hey.” You let out a shaky laugh. “What brings you here? Check up? Ultrasound?”

“I’d like to ask you the same thing, what brings you here?” She replies. 

You scratch your neck nervously. “Nothing major. Do you have a ride going home? Is Jungwoo picking you up?”

She nods her head. “You can come with us. We’ll drop you off—”

“I’ll be alright—”

“Y/N, I want you to remember that you can trust me. We’re like sisters, remember?” She says and it’s all that it takes for your eyes to flood with tears. 

“Y-Yeah, like sisters.” You stutter. Your voice cracks and you cover it up with a cough. “I’ll explain everything when we get in the car.”

You don’t explain everything when you get in the car. Instead, the car ride is silent. You find it difficult to bring it up. Jungwoo looks at you through his rearview mirror and he feels Clara tightly squeeze his hand. He glances at her and she gives him a look of doubt.

“S-So,” Jungwoo starts off a conversation. You look away from the scenery of cars driving on the highway outside the window. He smiles at you through his rearview mirror. “The weather’s been really nice today, huh?”

You snort. This is the first time you’ve laughed since last night. In fact, you did not sleep well last night because of the nervousness you were feeling. It’s been a couple of weeks since Eunwoo referred you to a disease specialist when he encountered you and the cherry blossom petals filling up your lungs. But even after the appointment, you still feel nervous. 

“After today’s ultrasound, it’s safe to say that I’m not expecting twins.” Clara sighs with relief. “Imagine how painful delivering two babies in one go would be. Can’t relate.”

The couple continues to talk about the baby and you’re not sure when you can start telling them. You can sense that they’re trying to make you feel better just so that you can feel more comfortable telling them. When their conversation dies down and as Jungwoo turns right into your neighbourhood, you decide to drop the bomb.

“I have an illness.” 

Jungwoo slams on the brakes and Clara scolds him.

“Hanahaki Disease,” you mumble, chuckling bitterly. “Have you heard of it?”

“Y/N…” Clara trails off. She doesn’t believe you. You? Of all people, why did it have to be you? 

“It started when Jaehyun started dating Lina,” you explain. “The breathing attacks, the shortness of breath, the cherry blossom petals. It all led up to this.”

Jungwoo frowns. “Is that what I saw? Those petals lying around on your bathroom floor?”

You nod. There are tears streaming down your cheeks and you wipe them away, one by one. Clara grabs some tissues and hands them over to you. Jungwoo has no words to say.

“All I wanted to do was find love.” You whisper. “But look where it got me. Whenever I see those stupid petals, I feel like this is all wrong, like falling in love is wrong.”

“Falling in love isn’t wrong. It shouldn’t feel wrong.” Clara reassures you. “Whatever feelings you have for Jaehyun, those feelings aren’t wrong and shouldn’t be.”

“Have you perhaps told Jaehyun?” 

You shake your head. “He can’t find out.”

“Why not?” Jungwoo asks. 

“If I tell him, I’ll lose him.” You reply. “I don’t want to lose him.”

“Why did the Doctor say?” Clara asks. 

Clara watches you fall silent, choosing not to answer as you gather your things. You bid them a farewell and thank them for driving you home. As you step inside of your home, you slowly slide down the door.

“From your x-ray, it is safe to say that you have Hanahaki Disease. Have you heard of it before?”

You nod. “My best friend has it.”

“Perfect. I’m assuming you are more familiar with this disease than the average person. Let me give you a quick breakdown.”

Your eyes follow your Doctor who’s pointing at the leftover petals sitting in your lungs at the moment. He points at your x-ray. 

“The reason why you have this disease is solely because of unrequited love. You may have experienced rejection recently or the past couple of months, which resulted in the occupation of cherry blossom petals in your lungs.” He explains.

“How long will I have this disease? Is it curable?” You ask. 

“It’s curable. There are three ways to cure this disease. The first possible cure is if you fall in love with someone else who so happens to return the same feelings. The second cure is if the person who caused your heartbreak falls in love with you, which reverses the unrequited love.”

“And the last possible cure?”

He purses his lips into a tight line. “The last cure is to permanently remove the petals through surgery.”

“Surgery?” He nods his head. 

“Yes. But beware,” he warns. “Once you have surgery, those feelings you once had for that person would be permanently removed as well. You will no longer fall in love with that person anymore.”

“Where’s the bride-to-be?”

All of the ladies turn towards the door to see an unfamiliar woman entering the small restaurant. You turn around and you feel your blood run cold. Lina enters the small restaurant and greets Clara by kissing her cheek. She hands Clara her gift and makes her way towards you. Clara looks at you apologetically.

“Y/N! Nice to see you.” Lina smiles.

Indeed, Lina looks beautiful. She screams Jaehyun’s ideal type. You wish you were as beautiful as her, as charming as her. 

You smile back at her. “Nice to see you too, Lina.”

“I don’t really know anyone here except for you and Clara. Clara invited me last minute, since Jaehyun and I started dating and all.” She explains.

Your eyebrows raise. “Oh, that’s—that’s nice. Why don’t you go ahead and grab something to eat first?”

“Oh, right! I’ll go ahead. Thanks!” She exclaims, grabbing her plate and heading towards the buffet to get food.

Clara approaches you and nudges your side. “I’m sorry, I had to invite her or else Jaehyun would suspect something. Besides, she’s his date to the wedding, it would be awkward if I didn’t invite her to my bridal shower.”

You shrug it off. “It’s alright. I’m not bothered by it at all.”

The evening goes by smoothly and peacefully with Lina sitting right beside you at the table. Clara is busy opening all the bridal shower gifts with a fake veil on the crown of her head. You’re watching Clara as she opens Lina’s gift, and it so happens to be a bonsai. Clara gasps in surprise and rushes over to thank Lina for the gift. 

“It seems like she really likes it,” you chuckle.

“Jaehyun suggested it as a gift.” Lina adds. “Y/N, I’ve been wanting to get close with you, since you’re Jaehyun’s best friend.”

You turn around to face her. “Sure. We can be friends.”

“Jaehyun talks and thinks very highly of you. You’re very special to him, as his best friend. I hope we can be the same. It might be a bit awkward because I abruptly came into his life and everything.” She looks hesitant.

“He does?” You ask. “I am?”

She nods. “I envy you, sometimes, because aside from me, you’re also important to him. I guess it’s just a given, where it’s normal to envy your boyfriend’s best friend who so happens to be a woman.”

“You don’t need to envy me,” you chuckle lightheartedly. You lie. “I don’t have any feelings for him, if that’s what you want to know—”

She cuts you off with a look. “I know you’re in love with Jaehyun.”

Your mouth clamps shut. You’re not close with Lina, therefore, you’re not sure how to react. You analyze her reaction, to see whether she’ll burst out in anger, if she’ll shove you off your chair and start a catfight, or if she’ll peacefully deal with the situation.

“I’m not in love with Jaehyun, I promise you—”

She smiles. “I’m not blind, Y/N. Anyone can see it, even a stranger. The heart never lies.”

You hesitatingly place your hand on hers. “But he’s in love with you, not me. Don’t worry about it, Lina. He’s absolutely in love with you. You should keep your chin up and take care of him.”

Lina looks at you with an expression you can’t read. You were feeling all the symptoms again. Your head was beginning to throb in pain and your arms and legs were starting to feel weak. At this point, you knew when it was going to happen. You excuse yourself, wobbling your way towards the washroom. 

You experience the symptoms whenever you’re around Jaehyun, whenever you’re around Lina, or whenever he’s the one being talked about. Those are the times where you think about Jaehyun the most, and it brings you back to May 2nd where he had indirectly rejected you. Anything that relates to your rejection or unrequited love will trigger your symptoms.

You bend over the toilet and throw up the petals. It’s a large batch this time, you notice. Your lungs feel like they’re on fire. 

Jaehyun steps inside the restaurant venue to pick up his girlfriend when he finds you rushing towards the washroom. You look sick. He grows concerned and shoves his phone back into his pocket. As he heads to the washroom you’re in, he stops in front of the door at the sound of you throwing up. He has a feeling in his gut that he can’t explain, and it urges him to barge into the washroom.

Cherry blossom petals. It’s the first thing he sees. They’re scattered all over the floor. He follows a trail of the petals and it leads him to a stall that’s been left open. He peeks through the stall and he grows pale. 

You’re bent over the toilet, throwing up cherry blossom petals. To be more exact, you’re throwing up petals of his own favourite flower. Only someone with the same exact condition would be able to understand it and connect all the dots.

You’re in love with him.

But he’s not in love with you.

And that’s why you’re throwing up cherry blossom petals.

You have the disease, and it’s all because of his unrequited feelings for you.

He wishes this was just a terrible nightmare.

“Y/N?”

You freeze in your spot. You turn around to see Jaehyun standing at the doorway of the stall. With widened eyes, you try to utter out an explanation but he’s too busy looking at you with shock.

“You have it too?” He whispers. “And it so happens to be cherry blossoms. But you didn’t dare tell me?”

“Jaehyun—”

“How dare you keep this a secret from me?” Anger and a look of betrayal is washed all over his face and you slowly get up from the floor.

“Jaehyun, please just let me explain.” You plead.

“You don’t need to explain. I see it with my own two eyes, Y/N.” 

He shakes his head in disappointment and disbelief, barging out of the washroom. You take off your heels and chase after him. As Jaehyun steps out of the washroom, he walks past Jungwoo. He looks at Jaehyun confusedly.

“Jaehyun?” Jungwoo watches as you chase after Jaehyun.

“Jaehyun, wait!”

Jungwoo is completely speechless as he watches Jaehyun storm out of the restaurant. Jaehyun feels like his world is spinning. His thoughts are clouded that he barely notices the heavy rain that’s slowly drenching his clothes. He’s not sure what to do except run, run far away. But he hears you calling out his name.

“Jaehyun, let me explain!”

He stops in his tracks and slowly turns around to face you. It is only when he sees you that he realizes that it’s raining. “How could you do this to me?”

Your tears blend in with the rain that’s dripping down your face. “I was going to tell you after I told Clara and Jungwoo—”

“Tell me what, that you’re in love with me? That I’m the reason for those cherry blossoms?” He cuts you off, letting out a bitter chuckle. “Don’t you think it’s a bit too late, Y/N? I feel like you betrayed me. Everyone knew except me—”

“I didn’t tell you because I know you’re in love with her.” You explain. “I thought that if I told you, you’d end up leaving me.”

“Were you supposed to tell me all of this that day we met up? When I told you that Lina and I started dating?” He asks and you’re too afraid to answer. He lets out a frustrated sigh. “You’re afraid to lose me but the moment you kept all of this a secret from me, was when you started to lose me.”

“Jaehyun, I’m sorry—”

He shakes his head. “I can’t return the same feelings for you, Y/N. You’re my best friend. But I don’t think being your best friend would be good for you.”

“No, Jaehyun, we can work things out—”

“We can’t work things out, Y/N.” He cuts you off. “Just leave me alone. I don’t think I could ever trust you anymore. It’ll be the best for the both of us.”

“Jaehyun,” you beg, reaching out to him. You grab his hand but he shakes your hand off.

“I don’t want to see you ever again.”

It’s almost like you lost your voice. As Jaehyun hops into his car, his headlights blind you before he drives off. You feel yourself fall to your knees, your sobs getting louder and louder. Jungwoo steps out of the restaurant and stands underneath a roof to find you crying your heart out. Clara rushes outside to get you back inside the restaurant. Jungwoo knows that the sound of your loud cries will haunt him forever. 

Jungwoo sighs.

This didn’t end well.

1 ½  years later…

“You chose the perfect place!”

You smile, clinking glasses with Clara. As you overlook the exhibit, you take a sip of your champagne. You would have never thought your life would transform into something different within one year. But here you are, one year later, running an exhibit for your photographs. There are visitors of different professions, some are art students, others are fellow photographers. 

Someone clears their throat. You turn around, seeing Eunwoo. You eye the bouquet of gardenia and sweet pea in his arms. 

“Congratulations on your exhibit.” He hands you the bouquet and you chuckle. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“I was wondering why you were late,” you mumble, sniffing the flowers. “Thanks for the flowers, they look lovely.”

“No problem. I’m really proud of you, Y/N—”

“Y/N? We have a bid for one of your photographs.” Your personal secretary, Hyejeong, interrupts the conversation. You raise an eyebrow in surprise. “He wants to meet you.”

“Sure,” you nod your head. You give Eunwoo an apologetic look. “Sorry. I’ll talk to you right after meeting the bidder!”

He waves it off. “No worries. Take all the time you need. I’m not going anywhere.”

As you follow Hyejeong, you carry the bouquet in your arms. There are fellow photographers greeting and congratulating you, and you feel heat rush to your cheeks by the sudden attention. Hyejeong leads you to the far end of the exhibit. You feel your pace slow down. 

“He’s right there.” She points at the bidder.

You follow her gaze and it falls upon a man. Just from the sight of his back, you know exactly who the man is. A lot can happen in a year, and it’s evident through his hair that’s dyed a blue-black, even through his drastic change of fashion. He looks more mature. 

You let out a breath. “You can leave us, Hyejeong. I’m sure Clara needs you to help her entertain the visitors.”

She nods her head. “Let me know if you need me.”

As she leaves you and the bidder alone, you feel your grasp on your bouquet begin to tighten. You approach the man who seems to feel your presence. He turns around and a gasp is caught in your throat.

You gather yourself together. “Can I help you with anything?”

Jaehyun stares at you in shock. You’ve changed. Your hair is no longer long, for it’s cut short and stops right at your shoulders. You look more composed. You no longer look shy and introverted. But you look beautiful. 

You look so beautiful that it hurts him.

“R-Right—” He stutters and points at the photograph behind him. “I’d like to make a bid.”

You look at the photograph he’s pointing at. It’s a photograph of him. You had taken that photo of him during Jungwoo and Clara’s prenuptial photoshoot. He’s standing in the field of sunflowers with his arms stretched out. You named the photograph, Renewal, because it was the first time Jaehyun had overcome his hatred of flowers. 

You purse your lips into a tight line. “I’d like to have you know that photographs on this side of the exhibit are not up for auction. Did you not read the notice before entering the exhibit, sir?”

He scratches the back of his neck. He eyes the bouquet in your arms. “Is that so? Sorry about that, I guess I’ll keep on looking.”

“Sure.” You mumble. “Now, if you’ll excuse me—”

“Y/N.”

You quirk an eyebrow. “Yes?”

He hesitantly smiles. You barely budge an inch and your expression remains blank. 

“It’s nice to see you. It’s nice to see you doing well.” He says with a hopeful gaze.

You nod your head and you prepare to say something extremely harsh, no matter how warm his smile is. You can’t let your guard down. You have every right to be mad at him. 

“I wish I could say the same to you. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have other clients to speak to.”

As you turn around, you feel your heart ache. Jaehyun watches you walk away from him, and he’s completely astonished. He expected this. He expected you to be coldhearted towards him and it’s all his fault. He acknowledges it, but he wasn’t prepared to see it happen right in front of him. 

You’ve changed. A year is more than enough to change someone, for better or for worse. But after seeing you, he’s not sure if time has changed you... or if he himself changed you. 

It was a couple of months ago where you were cured of the disease. You no longer threw up cherry blossom petals, and you were no longer experiencing the symptoms. The reason for your cure remains unknown. It could be that an unrequited lover has fallen in love with you or you have fallen in love with someone else who so happens to return your feelings. You’d like to think it was the latter. 

You don’t believe in the idea of unrequited lovers realizing their undying love for you, especially when it’s too late. That only happens in fairytale stories. 

“My date is looking beautiful tonight.” You hear Eunwoo say as he joins you out on the balcony. You giggle, rolling your eyes at him. 

Jungkook had just gotten married a couple of hours ago. You’re sure that he’s probably wasted on the dance floor with his wife scolding him for getting too drunk with their guests around. You feel a bit tipsy yourself after having a couple of glasses of wine. You decided to get some fresh air, not expecting your date, Eunwoo, to join you. You figured Eunwoo would be getting wasted with his newly-wedded friend. Guess not.

“I guess we’re the last ones who need to find fiances.” He sighs, sipping his wine. 

“Don’t even think about proposing to me, Eunwoo.” You mutter. “I don’t plan on getting diabetes because of all the sweets you’ll bake for me.”

He laughs. “Well, if I were to be honest with you, I did fall in love with you at some point.”

“You have?” You raise an eyebrow, surprised. “You should’ve told me. I would’ve dated you in a heartbeat.”

“You would?” He asks, surprised. You nod. “Wow, this truly tells me we’re not destined to be together. My timing was quite off. The Eunwoo a year ago should’ve just confessed.”

You smirk. “There’s no such thing as second chances, Eunwoo, so don’t even think about shooting your shot with me again. It’s not going to happen.”

“I liked you a lot, Y/N. But it looked like you were so in love with Jaehyun, so I didn’t bother. What’s even more funny was that I lied about having a girlfriend to see if you’d get jealous, but you barely reacted.” He reminisces, and the two of you share a good laugh together.

All this time, Eunwoo had proclaimed that he was officially off the market. Who knew that he did it just to earn some sort of jealous reaction from you? His timing was definitely off. 

You pat his shoulder. “You’ll find someone special. You just have to wait a bit longer.”

Eunwoo doesn’t reply and you look up at him questioningly. He’s looking at someone at the door. You follow his gaze and you let out a tiring sigh. Eunwoo glances at you and pats your back.

“I’ll head back inside, alright?” He insists. “Call me if you need anything.”

Eunwoo passes by Jaehyun, who’s standing at the door. The two of them glance at each other for a brief moment before Eunwoo tears his gaze. You look at Jaehyun for a brief moment before downing your glass of wine. You wince, the wine no longer tastes fruity and sweet, it tastes bitter. 

“Are you following me?” You ask him, turning away from him to look up at the night sky. It takes him a couple of seconds to stand a metre away from you. 

“I just wanted to talk to you.” Jaehyun says softly.

You scoff. “What is there to talk about?”

“Us.”

He sees you roll your eyes. “There was never an ‘us’. I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”

“Are you just going to ignore the fact that you were in love with me?” He dives straight to the point. “Are you still in love with me?”

Are you still in love with me? You chuckle bitterly, turning around to face him. You look over his shoulder to find a butler to fetch. You need another glass of wine. 

“Would my answer matter to you?” You argue back. “Last time I checked, you left me for her.”

“It was a mistake—”

“By the way,” you muster up a smile. “How are you guys? Is the relationship going well? I wouldn’t know, it’s been a while since you left.”

“We broke up.” He answers, and it comes out barely above a whisper. 

A butler finally comes around and hands you a glass of wine. You grab an extra glass for him. He doesn’t budge, looking quite astonished and speechless. You shrug your shoulders, placing it back on the butler’s tray.

“How sad,” you say. “Didn’t you tell me that she was the one?”

“Look, Y/N, I’m in love with—”

You close your eyes and cut him off with a sigh. “How long has it been? A year? Since you left me out there in the rain? I still remember that night. You must’ve forgotten because here you are, trying to befriend me again.”

Jaehyun remembers that night so vividly. He remembers how shattered he left you. But most of all, he remembers how guilty he felt for pushing you away. If he had the chance to turn back time, he’d do things much more differently.

“Well, I should get going. It was nice seeing you again, Jaehyun.” You fake a smile and he can see through it. You’re not happy, not the slightest bit. 

“Y/N—”

“And I hope this is the last time I’ll see you.”

Are you still in love with me? That’s a question you feared the most. It terrifies you because yes, you’re still in love with Jaehyun. You don’t see yourself being with anyone else. No matter how much he hurt you, you’re still in love with him. No matter how much he doesn’t deserve you, you’re still in love with him.

And that in of itself is more than enough to ruin your life.

Jaehyun is stubborn. 

He finds himself standing in front of your exhibition. This time, your exhibition is in a different city. He made the extra effort to drive to a different city in hopes of seeing you again. You may hate him for this, but he knew that he owed you an explanation. And if it was going to take many tries to get through to you, he would do it. He would do it in a heartbeat.

“One admission ticket for Y/N’s exhibition, please.” 

This time around, he didn’t show up empty-handed. He stopped by a flower shop a couple of blocks away from the gallery to pick up a fresh bouquet of—

“You saw the exhibit back in Seoul, but you’re here in Busan to see it again?” 

You’re standing in front of one of your photographs with your back facing him. He looks at the photograph, it’s a photo of Jungwoo and Clara’s shadows shown on the pavement. He can clearly make out that the photo was taken after their wedding for Clara’s shadows perfectly show a veil sitting on the crown of her head and the skirt of her dress. 

You turn around. “Cat bit your tongue?”

He hesitatingly approaches you, handing you the bouquet of flowers. You quirk an eyebrow. It’s a bouquet of violet lilacs, your favourite flower. 

“I know you hoped that our paths wouldn’t cross again but—”

“Thanks for the flowers.” You cut him off, gently grabbing the flowers from his hands. You take a quick sniff of the flowers and a smile threatens to form on your lips. But you’re quick to stop it. 

“Oh, hello there, stranger.”

The two of you spot Jungwoo, who’s entering the exhibition with his wife, Clara. Jungwoo feels a bit wary with Jaehyun being near you, and it’s evident with the lines on his forehead. Clara looks at you for reassurance and you bite your lip. 

“Long time, no see.” Jaehyun mumbles. 

“I was wondering where you ran off to after our wedding—ow!” Jungwoo’s sentence is cut short when Clara elbows him in the stomach. 

Clara fakes a smile. “Nice seeing you, Jaehyun. Of all places I’d expect myself to bump into you, I didn’t expect it to be at Y/N’s exhibit.”

Jaehyun barely utters a word. The atmosphere excuses nothing but awkwardness and tension. You clear your throat. 

“Did you drive all the way from Seoul to Busan?” Jungwoo asks him. 

He shakes his head. “I took the train.”

“Do you need a ride going home? We can drive you home, after you stroll around, of course.” Clara offers. 

“Clara,” you hiss through your teeth. 

“If you don’t mind,” Jaehyun says sheepishly. “I hope I’m not a bother—”

“Oh, you’re definitely not a bother.” You say sarcastically. As you let out a sigh, you hand Clara the bouquet of lilacs. “Excuse me, I have some visitors to speak to.”

Clara watches you as you walk away, leaving the three of them. “Y/N—” 

As the three of them are left behind, Clara’s shoulders slump in defeat and turns around to face the other two. She puts on her sunglasses and slings her bag over her shoulder.

“Want to grab a cup of coffee with us?” Clara asks Jaehyun.

He purses his lips into a tight line. “Sure.”

Jungwoo snorts. “Great. I could definitely use an espresso shot right now.”

The couple lead the way, leaving Jaehyun following closely behind. He looks over his shoulder to see you talking with one of the visitors. You have a warm smile on your face. It’s a smile he misses so much. He misses the times where you’d smile because of him. 

But now, he’s the reason for all your frowns. 

“I apologize for Y/N’s… behaviour.”

Jaehyun places down his cup of coffee onto the table. Seated across from him are Jungwoo and Clara. He waves it off. “You don’t need to. I kind of expected her to be like that, especially towards me.”

Jungwoo scoffs. “As you should.”

“Look,” Jaehyun begins. He wraps his hands around the warm mug of coffee. He avoids their gaze, but he feels the two of them burning holes through his head. “I regret everything. I deserve all of this. But all I want is for her to forgive me.”

“Are you sure that’s all you want from her?” Clara asks. “A second chance?”

“I think I have a better chance at being her best friend again. But a chance at being a lover? I’m not too sure.” Jaehyun confesses.

Jungwoo and Clara share a look. Clara takes a sip of her tea, completely surprised by the subtle confession. She clears her throat. “You’re in love with Y/N?”

Jaehyun nods his head. “I think I’ve always been in love with her.”

“Took you long to realize it.” Jungwoo smiles. “But I think you’re a bit too late.”

Jaehyun raises an eyebrow. “You really think I don’t have a chance?”

“Y/N gave up on love a long time ago.” Clara says truthfully. “But there may be a sliver of hope. That is, if you’re persistent enough to keep up with her. If you keep it up, she may give you a second chance. But once you give up, she’ll probably hate you forever.”

Jungwoo smirks. “You act like you don’t know Y/N, Jaehyun. I’m sure she’s still in love with you. All you have to do is show her that you’re in love with her. She can’t resist you.”

“You think so?”

“Y/N’s been your best friend for the longest time. It won’t take much to break down her walls again, especially if the one to tear down her walls is you.” Clara reassures him.

“Wait, when did you realize it?” Jungwoo asks. 

“Realize what?”

“That you’re in love with her.” Jungwoo mumbles.

“Seven months ago? I was on the search for her seven months ago.” Jaehyun replies while scratching the back of his head. 

Jungwoo looks at his wife. She looks back at him and he watches as the gears start to turn in her head. It’s not long until she finally figures it out. Jaehyun stares at the two of them communicate with their eyes.

Clara looks at Jaehyun. “You may have a huge chance, Jaehyun.”

Seven months. 

When Jaehyun started to fall in love with you seven months ago, you had just found out that you had been completely cured of the disease. 

“Text us when you get home!”

Jaehyun waves at Jungwoo and Clara, who dropped him off at a bus stop near his home. In a rush, they were only able to drop Jaehyun off at a bus stop because they had to pick up their daughter from the babysitter. He watches their car get smaller and smaller as it travels farther down the road. He looks up at the sky, and a raindrop falls onto his cheek. Suddenly, the raindrops start to fall more frequently. He clicks his tongue.

“I should make a run for it,” he says to himself, beginning to walk down the sidewalk.

It starts to rain. He starts jogging down the sidewalk when the rain gets heavier and heavier. But he’s completely out of shape and finds himself opting to walk in the heavy rain instead. His clothes are soaking wet, and all the people walking past him don’t bother offering an umbrella. As soon as he spots a convenience store, he hears a loud honk. He glances to his left to see an unfamiliar car parked by the curb. 

The window rolls down to reveal you. You look at him with concern.

“Get in. I’ll drive you home.” You insist.

“I’ll be fine, I don’t want to be a bother—”

“Just get in or else I’m leaving you here.” You cut him off. “Take it or leave it.”

He hesitatingly walks to your car and hops into the passenger’s seat. You drive off. The ride is silent, and he distracts himself from the lit-up signs and billboards. You remember where he lives. He would have expected you to completely shut him out of your life, where you would even forget his address. But you remembered.

“How could you not have an umbrella on you? Did you not hear the forecast today?”

He looks away from the window. You’re focused on the road. Your expression remains the same; completely blank. He doesn’t say anything.

“Look at you, you’re completely wet.” You mutter to yourself. A smile threatens to spread across his lips. You care. You care about him, even if it was just a slight bit. “Great. Now my car seat is completely wet too. So much for maintaining a clean car.”

He probably looks like a fool for smiling at you. You tear your gaze away from the road when you reach a red stoplight. When you look at him, he quickly looks away. You can feel your heart ramming in your chest. 

“Thanks for driving me home.” He says in advance. 

The stoplight turns green. You step on the gas, mumbling, “It’s nothing.”

It’s a complete lie. You decided to visit your old place, maybe drop by the nearby convenience store to eat a nice hot, steaming cup of ramen. But you didn’t expect to park by the curb, only to find Jaehyun ready to walk inside after walking in the heavy rain. The sight of Jaehyun’s wet hair and clothes made you feel bad. 

As you park your car, you glance at Jaehyun who’s fallen asleep. He shivers in his sleep and it immediately makes you check his temperature. Surely enough, Jaehyun has a slight fever that will probably last the entire night after getting soaked by the rain. You sigh, turning off the engine of your car.

“Jaehyun.” You nudge him awake. He rubs his eyes and you notice how he’s beginning to shiver. “Give me the keys to your house.”

“Huh—”

“You have a slight fever.”

“I can take care of it myself, don’t worry—”

“Knowing you, you are incapable of looking after yourself. Hand me the keys.” You extend your open hand out to him and he fishes his keys in his pocket. “Let’s head inside.”

As you support Jaehyun on the walk inside, you notice how his body leans comfortably onto your side. He leans in closer to your warmth. As you jam his keys into the lock, you swing the door open for the both of you. 

“Geez, you’re heavy.” You say with a grunt. You reach up to feel his forehead and indeed, his fever is getting worse. “Let’s get you to your bed.”

Thankfully enough, he’s brought to his bed in one piece. You dust your hands off, walking into his bathroom to prepare a damp cloth for his forehead. Jaehyun’s teeth clatter as he shivers on his bed. Through hooded eyes, he sees you wringing a cloth in his bathroom. You place the cloth along with a bowl of water on top of his bedside table and grab a pair of pajamas from his drawers. 

“Could you do me one favour and change into these? I’ll be outside. Call me when you’re done changing.”

And so you find yourself standing outside of his bedroom. Your eyes linger across his living room until they stop at one of the walls. The wall is decorated with a collection of Polaroid pictures. Curiosity gets the best of you and you get closer to the Polaroid wall to get a better look at the pictures. 

The first picture at the top left of the wall is a picture of Jaehyun and Jungwoo. They’re holding up a peace sign. It’s the first Polaroid picture Jaehyun took with the Polaroid camera you gifted him for his birthday. As your eyes scan the pictures from left to right, you start to notice how they’re all pictures of.. you. 

You shake your head, shrugging off your thoughts. You turn your back against the wall, but his coffee table grabs your attention. On his coffee table, there’s a couple of advertisement flyers. They’re flyers of your photography exhibit. 

“This can’t be,” you whisper to yourself. 

Your feet drag you to his kitchen. On his fridge, you spot a couple of notes you’ve written and left for him. From reminders to small words of encouragement, your handwriting is found all over the notes. It’s noticeable how old the notes are, for some of the adhesive is wearing out, causing the corners of the sticky-note to peel off. 

Everywhere in his home, Jaehyun has a reminder of you. Even after a year and a half, he never once pushed you out of his life. But he offered to walk out of yours himself.

But why did he hurt you? Why did he leave you? Why did it take him one year?

Your eyes well up with tears. Suddenly, you hear Jaehyun open the door and call out your name. You turn your back against him to quickly wipe your tears. 

“Coming.” You mumble. You sniff softly, gathering yourself together. 

And right before you enter Jaehyun’s bedroom, you look back at the Polaroid wall one last time. 

While you thought Jaehyun walked out of your life for good, you somehow remained in his life through memories.  

The cafe is busy with university students rushing in and out with their caffeine boost. You almost bump into one. Seated at a table for two, your eyes meet Lina. She flashes you a small smile, sending you a wave. The beat of your heart speeds up out of nervousness. 

“I didn’t think you would come.”

You bite your lip. “Me either.”

“Look—”

“You’re getting married?” You cut her off. She avoids your gaze, slowly nodding her head. You take out the invitation she had mailed to you. You read the names on the invitation. “Does Jaehyun know?”

“He knows—”

“And how does he feel about it?” You question. “I hope you didn’t hurt his feelings. He was very much in love with you, Lina—”

“Jaehyun and I dated for four months, Y/N.” She tells you the truth and you look at her confusedly. “We broke up because of you.”

“W-What?” You stutter. 

“Two months into the relationship, I started to notice how important you are to him. Everything we did reminded him of you. I was starting to question whether he was in love with me or not because all he did was talk about you.” She explains. “Y/N this, Y/N that. But I brushed it off, and I let it drag on for another two months.”

“He told me that you were the one,” you shake your head in disbelief. “We were all sure that the two of you would end up together—”

“Jaehyun’s in love with you.” She gets straight to the point. “You deserve him. He deserves you. I mean, after you got my invitation, the first person that came to your mind was not you, but Jaehyun. I hope you’re still in love with him, Y/N.”

She was right. After you received the invitation, the first person you thought of was Jaehyun. You wondered if he was heartbroken by the news of her engagement. You wondered if he was taking it easy, if he was doing alright. 

“I hope you can come to my wedding, Y/N.” She smiles. “Although we’re on awkward terms, it would be nice to have you attend. I still consider you as someone I’d like to be friends with.”

“I’ll think about it,” you purse your lips into a line. “Thank you for even thinking about inviting me.”

“I hope you’ll get the closure you need.”

Jungwoo pulls up to the venue, parking his car and turning off the engine. He’s never felt so nervous for a best friend. He looks at you through his rearview mirror. You’re anxious. There are strangers dressed up in suits and dresses, all huddled up in groups outside of the venue. They’re most likely long-time friends of Lina and her soon-to-be husband. 

“Are you sure you will be alright on your own?” You tear your gaze from a couple who are taking a selfie. 

You smile. “I’ll be alright. If anything, I’ll call you.”

You feel awkward standing by yourself. Jungwoo had already left you after giving you one last peptalk. You decide to head inside the venue to wait for the couple to arrive. The venue is beautiful. Their wedding theme so happens to be a backyard wedding, making their guests feel more comfortable. You can tell that they wanted a more home-y concept for their wedding. It’s shown through the white chairs scattered across the grass, the rose petals spread across the aisles, and the right amount of candles lit around the perimeter. 

“It’s beautiful, huh?” 

Jaehyun shoves his hands inside his pockets and looks around the venue. You grow confused, turning around to see him standing a couple of metres away. 

“You were invited too?” You ask and he nods his head.

He chuckles. “I actually don’t know anyone here except you.”

From the corner of your eye, you can see him stand next to you. He has the sudden urge to hold your hand, but he knows that it wouldn’t be a good idea to do. You’re afraid that he can hear your heart that’s beating tremendously loud and fast. Little did you know, the two of you are standing in the middle of the aisle that leads up to the front, where the groom and bride are to be wedded. Oh, how Jaehyun wishes that he’d be standing at the front to watch you walk down the aisle for him.

“I don’t know anyone here except you,” you say. 

He glances at you. “Can we at least be friends just for today? I don’t think I’ll be able to handle being on my own.”

You snort. “Last time I checked, you told me to stay away from you. Now you’re asking me to be friends with you for a day?”

“I’m just taking my chances.” He shrugs his shoulders. “Besides, I regret everything I said to you that night.”

“Rightfully so,” you mumble. You face him. “Fine. But once this day is over, I want you to do one thing for me.”

“Sure.”

You fold your arms. “Stay away from me. I don’t want to see you ever again.”

He stares at you for a brief moment. You look beautiful. You’re wearing a long lavender purple dress that stops just above your ankles. It’s an off-shoulder dress, and you style it up by wearing stacked gold necklaces. 

He extends his hand out for you to seal the deal.

“Deal.”

The wedding was everything you expected it to be. Lina and her husband have been best friends since they were in diapers, and it was a given that they would end up together. It made you wonder how your life would’ve been different if Jaehyun was in love with you and if he returned the same feelings you have for him. 

You wish the night would be over, where you could lay down on your bed and hibernate for a couple of months. You’re not into social interaction, especially with people you barely know. It was a shame that you and Jaehyun were assigned to sit at a table with complete strangers. At this point, you’re depending on Jaehyun to spice up your night by keeping you company.

“Y/N,” he nudges you as the lights in the hall start to dim. “Do you hear that?”

“Hear what?”

“It’s our favourite song.” He smiles. 

You listen carefully and indeed, it is your favourite song. A smile threatens to spread across your lips. As Daniel Caesar’s ‘Best Part’ starts to play, you feel yourself go back to prom night. You had been stood up by your date and Jaehyun found you sitting outside of the venue all alone. He had offered to be your date for the last couple of hours of prom night. A smile forms on your lips when you remember Jaehyun playing this song and offering to dance with you.

“Shall we dance?”

You’re brought back to reality. You glance at him. He looks back at you with a look you can’t read. His eyes are trying to tell you something, but you can’t make out what he wants to tell you. 

“Will it be good for me?” 

“We won’t know until we try.” 

And so you both try. On the dance floor with many other couples, Jaehyun grabs your hand and your fingers interlock. Your hands fit perfectly together. He places his hands on your waist and you carefully place yours on his shoulders. He’s standing so close to you, you could feel his hot breath hit your skin. 

“I don’t remember if I told you how beautiful you look,” he says softly.

You blink. “Thanks. You don’t look too bad yourself.”

Jaehyun’s eyes trail down to your plump lips. You look away from him. The song is so intimate and holds a memory that you wish to forget. As the song comes to an end, your eyes meet Jaehyun’s one last time. Before you could process it, he’s slowly leaning in. His lips brush yours and you’re so close to getting carried away by pulling him closer. 

But you catch yourself right on time. Before the kiss gets passionate, you pull away by pushing his chest. He looks completely surprised. You touch your lips, shaking your head.

“This is wrong—”

“Y/N—”

“Stay away from me.” You warn him. “Stay right there. Don’t follow me.”

Out of shock, you barge out of the reception venue. Your eyes are tearing up. You told yourself that you’re never going to fall in love again. You gave up on love a long time ago, but all it takes is one look from him and you’re doomed—

“Y/N.”

You slowly look over your shoulder to see Jaehyun standing at the door, out of breath. He had chased you. 

“This was a bad idea. I knew it was a bad idea. I shouldn’t have—”

“Y/N, I’m in love with you.” He confesses. You turn your back towards him. “You don’t know how long I’ve been wanting to tell you that. Seven months, Y/N. Seven months of—”

“Those pictures of us in your living room. Why do you still have them?” 

“Because I can’t bring myself to throwing them out. They’re precious memories, Y/N. I kept them because it’s the only thing I have left that reminds me of you.” He explains.

Tears start streaming down your cheeks and you let out a scoff as you wipe them away. “Why am I like this around you? I hate being like this. Whenever it comes to you, I find himself going back to you when I shouldn’t. I shouldn’t be in love with you—”

“I—”

“Jaehyun, you’ve had six relationships. You endured your sickness for six relationships and you didn’t fight it alone because I was there. I was there because I chose to stay.” You will yourself to turn around and look at him. He looks broken. “But when the tables turn and I fall in love for the first time, when I need you the most, you leave me. In fact, you left me for her.”

“You have every right to hate me,” he whispers.

“I was fighting all alone.” You bite your quivering lip. “Jungwoo got married. Jungkook got married. Eunwoo is planning on proposing to his girlfriend. And me? I’m still fighting on my own. I’m still in love with you when I clearly shouldn’t be.”

“Please, Y/N—”

“I’m tired of being in love with you.” He looks at you with hopeless eyes. “If you really love me, you would do me a favour and leave me alone. Isn’t that what you told me to do in the first place? Leave you alone?”

Jaehyun doesn’t know what to say. You look exactly how you looked that night he left you. You’re still broken. You’re still not over him. 

“Y/N—”

“You sealed the deal earlier, right? When I told you that I hope I’ll never see you again, I meant it. I don’t want to ever see you again. It’ll be the best for me.”

He’s completely speechless and you take it as your cue to leave when Jungwoo pulls up in the parking lot. Jungwoo looks concerned from his seat in the car. Just as you’re about to leave, Jaehyun says your name one last time. You look at him over your shoulder. There are tears streaming down his cheeks. 

“I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

He’s selfish. 

“Fine.” You mutter. “Have it your way.”

“If fate thinks we’re destined to be together, I hope you’ll know where to find me.”

“Stop skipping your meals and eat.”

It’s been weeks since Lina’s wedding. It’s been weeks since you last saw Jaehyun standing in front of you, broken and hopeless. You haven’t been doing great. In fact, you’ve been feeling horrible. You feel like your heart has been run over ten times and back. You’re not sure what to feel, but Jaehyun’s voice confessing his love for you echoes through your head every now and then. 

You toss a tissue into the trash can. “Jungwoo, shouldn’t you be picking up your daughter from the babysitter?”

“I asked if she could stay a bit more. I can’t just leave you here looking like this, Clara will kill me if she finds out.” Jungwoo frowns. “Could you please just take care of yourself?”

“I’m not in the mood to eat, if that’s what you were wondering.”

“Stop being stubborn.” Jungwoo says sternly.

He looks around your room and his eyes fall upon a framed picture sitting on your bedside table. He squints his eyes to get a clearer view of the picture. It’s a picture of you and Jaehyun from prom night. He has his arm thrown over your shoulder. The two of you are standing close to each other, pulling off your funniest face. 

“Hey,” he says, nodding his head at the picture. “You still have that? You kept it all this time?”

You follow his gaze and it lands on the picture of you and Jaehyun. “Oh, I forgot to throw it out—”

“Don’t even try to lie. I know you can’t bring yourself to throwing it out.” Jungwoo interrupts you.

“Stop reminding me of how deeply in love I am with Jaehyun when I shouldn’t be.” You plead. “I didn’t ask to be reminded of him—”

“Why are you stopping yourself from wanting what your heart wants?” 

You fall silent.

“Your heart wants Jaehyun. You can’t change your heart’s mind because your heart has no mind.” Jungwoo explains.

“You have a point. But still,” you shake your head. “I am not going to give up on a year’s worth of moving on.”

“But you never truly moved on if you’re still in love with him, Y/N. It’s been a year and you’re still in love with him. Besides, he’s in love with you. Shouldn’t you just give him a second chance?

“No.”

“God, you’re so stubborn.” Jungwoo sighs. 

“He’s the reason for those stupid cherry blossoms and that stupid disease—”

“Y/N, there’s something Clara and I wanted to tell you in relation to that.” Jungwoo says and looks like he’s just realized something. “When we took Jaehyun out for a cup of coffee—”

“I don’t want to hear it—”

“Just listen!” He exclaims as you cover your ears with your hands. You can still hear him, unfortunately. “He told us that he realized his feelings for you seven months ago.”

“So?” You raise an eyebrow.

His shoulders slump. “Didn’t you get cured of the disease seven months—”

“Wait.” You cut him off. Your hands slowly uncover your ears. “What did he say?”

“Jaehyun told us that he realized his feelings for you seven months ago.” Jungwoo repeats himself and he sees the gears start to turn in your head. “Seven months ago, Y/N. Didn’t you get cured of the disease—”

“Seven months ago.” You finish it for him. “Holy shit.”

The first possible cure to your disease is if you fall in love with someone else, who happens to return the same feelings. That cure rules out because you’ve never fallen in love after Jaehyun. 

The second possible cure to your disease is by surgically removing the petals itself. You decided not to get the procedure done because your feelings would be compromised and there was a chance that you would never fall in love again.

The third and last cure to your disease is if your unrequited lover happens to fall in love with you, reversing the unrequited love. 

Jaehyun fell in love with you seven months ago. At the same time, you were cured of the disease.

Holy shit.

“You said you were picking up your daughter, right?” You say, in complete shock. “Start your car. I need you to drive me somewhere.”

As you and Jungwoo hop into the car, there’s only one person you have in mind. It’s Jaehyun. As Jungwoo drives down the road, you look out the window. Your first place to find Jaehyun is your exhibition. He’s always been there just to look for you. 

Jungwoo stares at the cherry blossoms lined up on the sidewalk. “The cherry blossoms bloomed beautifully, huh?”

You nod your head. “Yeah, focus on your driving.”

Jungwoo chuckles. 

He parks in front of the exhibition and you don’t hesitate on getting out of the car. The security guard greets you and you rush into the exhibition. Your eyes scan the room. He’s not in sight. You sigh, running your hands through your hair.

“If fate thinks we’re destined to be together, I hope you’ll know where to find me.”

You finally realize it.

“God, why do you have to be so complicated, Jaehyun?”

Jungwoo finds you rushing out of the exhibition. You’re starting to jog down the sidewalk and he looks at you confusedly. He hops out of the car and calls out your name.

“Y/N! Where are you going?”

You stop in your tracks, turning around. “I think I know where he is. Thanks for the ride!”

Jungwoo smiles. “You’ll figure it out.”

You look up at the cherry blossom trees. There are petals slowly falling down. You glance down at your phone and coincidentally enough, it’s May 2nd. You continue to jog down the sidewalk, turning a left and a right. Finding Jaehyun is harder than you thought, especially when there are couples scattered down the strip of the road. 

Jaehyun steps out of the cafe with an iced americano in his hand. He looks up at the cherry blossom trees and a smile starts to form on his lips. It’s a beautiful day, he thinks to himself. But it’ll be much more beautiful if he sees you—

“Y/N?” He spots you jogging down the sidewalk across the street. 

You’re stopping at each shop and cafe to look through the window. You’re checking to see if Jaehyun is in any of the shops. Unknowingly, Jaehyun is crossing the street to chase after you. You’re walking way too fast, Jaehyun notes. You’re crossing the road that’s slowly coming to an end. You’re ready to give up at this point. 

As you reach the end of the road, you let out a sigh of defeat. You hunch over, trying to catch your breath. 

“Y/N?” You hear a voice.

You straighten up your posture, turning around to see Jaehyun standing behind you. He’s completely out of breath and he lets out a breathless laugh. You look at him with doe-eyes.

“You walk so fast, I was hoping you’d slow down—oof! Oh, alright.” He says as you crush him in a huge hug. 

You pull away from the hug to whack his arm. “Why were you so vague with your hint? I spent a whole ass hour trying to look for you—”

“You were looking for me?” He blushes. 

“Yeah,” you mumble. “Sorry, I just—”

“The cherry blossoms bloomed perfectly, don’t you think?” He cuts you off, gesturing towards the tree hovering over the both of you. 

“Yeah, it did.” You say softly, scratching the back of your neck. Why do you suddenly feel so nervous around him? “It was nice seeing you, I should probably get going—”

“You’re leaving already?” 

You slowly nod your head. “I—I just wanted to say hi. That’s all. I’ll see you around, Jaehyun.”

You’re too nervous to tell him. You feel like you’ll get rejected again. As you turn around, you feel his hand grab your wrist, pulling you back. You look up at him with hopeful eyes.

“You’re leaving right after you found me?” He asks. 

“I don’t know what to tell you, Jaehyun.” You say softly. 

“You’re not going to tell me that you’re still in love with me?” He says as he looks into your eyes. 

His eyes are easier to read now. It’s all crystal clear. It’s laid out perfectly in front of you.

“I’m still in love with you,” you whisper. 

“I’m in love with you,” he confesses. “Always have.”

His face brightens up. He never thought that he’d hear it from you. He feels like the luckiest man on Earth. Fate surely thinks the two of you are destined to be together, for it brought you both together at the perfect time and place the heart only knows. 

“So, when do you want to get married?”

“Slow your horses, Jaehyun.”

He lets out endearing laughter.

He’s surely going to marry you one day.

author’s note. this took so long to finish, i am so sorry for the long wait. i hope you guys enjoyed this! i think i’m going to take a few days off because writing this huge fic of a monster made me want to pull my hair out. again, i hope you guys enjoyed this!

send me feedback! comments? suggestions? let me know!

[whereisten]

Promises

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | more coming soon

“I make no promises, I can't do golden rings, but I'll give you everything tonight”

Pairing: Mafia Leader!Jaehyun x female reader (cafe owner)

Genre: Friends to lovers au, fluff, smut and angst

Warnings: gun and violence mention, blood mention, stalking, unprotected sex, slight choking kink, slight impregnation kink, oral sex (female receiving), rough sex, overstimulation

Word Count: 6.5k

((A/N: this is a short fic series inspired by the song “Promises” by Calvin Harris & Sam Smith. It's been some time! Y/N is now a bakery shop owner! I hope you enjoy this short series, I believe there will be four parts. If you're a jujutsu kaisen fan, the Geto version will be added to our ao3 :)))

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[2 Months Later]

It’s 10:30 PM, the chairs are up and you’ve just about finished mopping the floor. Jaehyun sighs and leans back into the driver’s seat of his car. He’d been watching you every night since he left. He couldn’t stand to not be near you, or to not make sure you were out of harm's way once you left work and walked home at late hours.

If he hadn’t messed up that night, if he hadn’t been vulnerable with you and given into his heart's desires life a selfish, touch-starved man, he would still have a friend. He could keep you company when you closed the bakery, and talk to you about everything. Just like the days before that night.

You lock the front door with your keys, and start your journey home. 

You sigh, dragging your hand bag over your shoulders and buttoning your coat. “Well, at least there’s no rain tonight.” Your eyes and legs are tired, and all you want to do is climb into bed and enjoy a cup of hot chocolate, maybe you’ll watch a movie. You put your headphones in and fix your hands into the coat pockets

You’re about halfway into your 25 minute walk when Jaehyun notices two men following you. As usual, he drives slowly, and without his headlights on the dark road so you don’t suspect being followed. The two men walked out of an alleyway as if they were waiting for you to pass them. Jaehyun’s brows furrow. He knew you couldn’t hear their steps because you were listening to music, but how couldn’t you feel their presence?

“Shit.” He grumbles, knowing that he will have to make himself known if he is about to stop these men.

2 minutes later and they still huddle together while walking behind you, however, you bop your head to a new song just released by your favorite k-pop group.

“Oooo I’ll have to add this one.” You say to yourself, adding the song to your Bakery’s playlist on Spotify. By the time you look back up, you see a car swerve right in front of you.

“Holy-“

“Get in!” Jaehyun unlocks the door of his coupe, which is now perpendicular to the sidewalk, blocking you in with no choice but to get in.

Your look of shock turns into one of disdain. You take your headphones out. “You’ve got some nerve.”

You walk in front of the car and flash both middle fingers before continuing home.

Jaehyun curses under his breath, swerving the car back into the street to drive beside you.

“Listen, let’s talk about it, okay? You just need to get in right now, I’ll take you home.”

“I don’t even know who you are.” You roll your eyes.

“Y/n! Stop fucking around! Get in!”

“Hey hey hey…no need to get aggressive, man…she said she’s not interested.” A strange voice says from behind you.

Before you can turn around to see his face, he drapes a heavy arm over your shoulders to stop you from walking any longer.

“Leave her alone…she told you to get lost.” Another man speaks, your eyes widen.

“You alright, sweetheart?” They turn to you, your heart begins to race as you get an immense feeling of dread.

Jaehyun quickly puts the car in park and jumps out. He walks towards them as they pull you back. “Get off of her.”

You reach out for him with pleading eyes. “J-“ you start, but you feel something circular pressing into the small of your back.

“Oh no, we’re saving her from you, she’ll be perfectly fine once you’re gone.” The man chuckles.

“Tell him to get lost or we’ll put a hole in you.” The other whispers into your ear.

You gasp and look back up at Jaehyun.

“Fuck off dude, you’re a creep. Isn’t he, sweetheart?” He presses it in more.

“I-I’m fine, just go away!” You look at Jaehyun in hopes that he will listen, one wrong move and it could be either of you with a new bloody hole to model.

Jaehyun lowers his hand and nods. “Okay.” He walks away and jumps back into the car. You feel a sense of relief, but it's short-lived as you are now subject to whatever these men want to do with you. You feel disappointment and despair. Did Jaehyun really give up on you that easily? Could he really abandon you in this moment when you needed him the most?

The men drag you back into a dark alleyway.

“Please! Leave me alone! Don’t kill me!” You beg for your life in hopes that they will just leave you alone, that they’ll have a sudden change of mind. But deep down you know they’ve been planning, they’ve finally caught a victim and don’t plan on stopping now.

They only laugh and tie your hands together behind you while you sob and plead.

“Quiet down, sweetie, you’ll live but only if you shut the hell up.”

One of the men says before throwing you into the brick wall. You grunt as you feel your back collide with the rough surface.

The man is about to say something else when you hear a sharp, high-pitched noise echo into the night. You shut your eyes, flinching when you feel blood splatter across your face.

When you open them you see the body of one of the men laid out right in front of you, a small hole in his forehead gushing out blood as his blank eyes stare at you. You scream, and the other man grabs your coat, yanking you in front of him before pressing a gun to your temple.

“Who the fuck is there?! I’ll shoot her right now!” He looks around anxiously.

The alleyway is completely dark, you can’t see anyone, but the man backs away thinking that the shot came from the right side.

He stumbles over his friend's body, releasing his tight grip on you in the process. You take it as your chance to run away. He tries to run after you, “Hey you bitch!, get back-“

Before he can finish, another shot goes off. The man lets out a blood curdling scream and drops to the ground. You quickly turn around, panting as you see his shadow finally come to light.

Jaehyun.

Your dark-haired savior walks slowly towards the crying man with a sniper gun in his hand. He lugs it around like it's nothing, but based on the length, noise, and precise shots, you know it’s heavy. You swallow hard as you watch his menacingly large figure create an engulfing shadow over the man.

As he walks under a street light that the man has dragged himself to, you see a completely unfamiliar look on Jaehyun’s face. He’s angry, no.. he’s outraged, and the dark glare in his eyes makes your heart race. Is it because he’s hot, or is it because he’s terrifying? You’re not sure.

Nonetheless, he doesn’t give the man a chance to beg. He cocks his gun and shoots his other kneecap. The man places both hands over it and cries out while laying on his back.

“No!! Please don’t! I’m sorry, we weren’t gonna hurt her!” The man cries out when he sees the grim face of Jaehyun looking down on him as he crawls away.

Jaehyun cocks his sniper gun again.

You finally snap out of your daze and run towards him. “No stop! Don't do this!” You yell out.

Jaehyun doesn’t respond to neither you nor him, he only aims for the crying man’s crotch area. He shoots him again and cocks his gun. The man struggles to back away from him as he aims it at his head. 

Jaehyun is so furious, not a word escapes him, he only feels rage and sees red. 

But just as he’s about to pull the trigger again, you jump onto the ground in between the gun and the man.

“Jaehyun! Stop! Please, he’s learned his lesson.” You pant, your arms till aching as they are tied behind your back.

“Move.” Jaehyun’s tone is dark, you don’t even recognize him.

You swallow hard, hoping you can get through to him. “Jaehyun..it’s not worth it, the police are gonna be here any second now, just leave.”

“I said move. I’m gonna blow his head off.”

“No! I won’t allow you to! This ends now.”

Jaehyun’s voice raises. “They put their hands on you! They were going to hurt you! They deserve nothing but pain!” 

“Yes! I agree, but you’ve done enough! Get out of here!”

Suddenly, police sirens start to get louder, it's as if someone called them after hearing the shots.

“Jaehyun..help me, please.” You look up with wide eyes, and finally, Jaehyun snaps out of it.

He finally puts his gun by his side and leans down to help you up. 

He looks back at the man and kicks his head hard, leaving him crotchless and bleeding out on the dirty ground alone.

The two of you run back to Jaehyun’s car.

 He helps you into the passenger seat before jumping in and speeding away.

“Jaehyun, what the hell! You–you just killed someone.” You cry as he drives maniacally to your place.

“Are you okay?” He ignores your panic.

“Okay? Okay?! No I’m not fucking okay, Jaehyun, I just witnessed a murder! There’s- there’s blood all over me!” 

Once at a stop light, he takes his pocket knife out and cuts your zip ties. 

“Are you hurt?” He asks as he examines your soft face and body.

You sigh and look into his worried eyes. Damn it, why did he have to look at you like you’re his world? “I’m..listen I’m fine, but what you did was not okay, you just killed-“

“It’s what I do y/n.” He says lowly, calmly, but with a scary tone. The light turns green and he continues driving. The street lights illuminate his sharp features and you feel your heart drop. The man you had a deep longing for lived to kill, and killed to live, that’s the reality of it. He had no regrets whatsoever after taking a human life.

This was normal for him.

His fist tightens around the steering wheel. Your eyes catch a glimpse of the thick veins in his arms. “If something happened to you..I couldn’t live with myself..I’m sorry you had to see that, but it was necessary.”

He looks at you then quickly looks away, hiding how his eyes started to fill with water. You didn’t deserve to be treated that way. You’re just trying to get home after a long day of work. What if he wasn’t there to save you? What if he lost you? And he realizes once again why you two could never date. You’re nowhere near ready to see him for who he truly is.

You take a deep breath and relax into your seat, resting your elbow on the door. Your fingers shakily press against your temple as you look out of the window . “Jaehyun..you can’t protect me from the world..you can’t just hover around and follow me everywhere.”

“Why the hell not?” His nose scrunches.

You flick your head towards him. “Because you’re not my boyfriend! You yourself said you regretted ever meeting me, you never wanted to see me again, and yet, here you are swooping in like fucking Batman!”

Jaehyun clenches his jaw and abruptly parks his car outside of your apartment building. 

“I mean nothing to you..you should start acting like I don’t.” You look down at the floor and say sternly.

He sighs. “Y/n..I—didn’t..” he stumbles over his words as you sit there in silence.

You look back up at him, and he wants to hug you, he wants to hold you and get lost in your beautiful eyes. He takes a moment to breathe in your scent, still fresh and pretty after a long day at work. 

“What?” You watch him as he stares.

He sighs and looks out of the window. “You can get out now.”

You purse your lips and nod, tears threatening to escape. “...the next time I see you outside of my job, I’m going to call the police.” All this time, you knew he was watching. 

Jaehyun turns back to you with a puzzled expression. Night after night, you’d seen his black sports car parked a few feet away from the bakery. You knew he was there, and you never approached him about it. 

You look into his eyes before opening the door and stepping out. Jaehyun doesn’t protest as you slam the door and head inside.

Once he sees your apartment light turn on, he drives away, angry at himself once again. What if someone saw him with you? What if they knew he had a weakness and knew where that said weakness lived?

He lays in his bed after taking a hot shower and falls asleep quickly. 

“Jaehyun..”

“Hnnn..” His eyes struggle to open.

“Jaehyun..baby.”

“Yes…hmmm.”

“Need you..” 

Jaehyun hears your soft voice and feels your warmth. He opens his heavy eyes to see that he’s back in his car. This time he’s in the backseat with you beside him. 

“Y/n..” He rubs his thumb over your cheek to check if you’re really there. You lean in and look into his eyes before kissing him deeply while closing your eyes. 

 Jaehyun turns his head and groans into your mouth as his tongue traces over your smooth lips. Cherry. The same cherry balm he tasted when kissed your lips the first time. 

The hunger in his chest grows, he grabs you by the waist and brings onto his lap, your arms still tied behind you as you moan. He handles you like it’s nothing, pushing your skirt up your hips and to your waist before pulling you down harder onto him. 

He releases your lips finally, a string of spit dropping down your chin as you whimper. He pulls his pocket knife out and quickly cuts the fabric of your underwear, a move that has your skin riddled with goosebumps in no time.

He looks at the knife, thinking about how he should also cut your zip ties, but also thinking of how he doesn’t really want to. Something about you being bound, restricted, and doomed to ride him until you swelled with his offspring made everything hotter to him.

He looks up at you while brushing his fingers over your opening. It's silky with your essence, already building just from your kiss. You throw your head back and start to grind onto them as he teases you. “You’re so beautiful.” He whispers, gazing up at your angelic face. He swears he’s already in heaven.

His fingers finally enter you, a high-pitched moan escaping you once you feel them stretching you out. 

“I-I’m ready!” You move faster, finding it hard to hold back as you’re so wound up already.

He pulls his fingers out and wraps his arm around you to guide you down onto him. “Good girl…almost there.” He whispers while watching you take him in.

The sight is so satisfying, he doesn’t know if he’ll last all night. You gasp once his tip kisses your sweet spot, but you continue to move up and down like you did with his fingers.

You move easily, your essence and his pre cum being all the lubricant you need to fit him inside repeatedly. He groans, rubbing his large hands along your thighs.

“So—good, I can’t” You struggle to move steadily with your arms tied behind you, you’re close, but getting weaker. You close your eyes as tears escape.

He tilts your chin, forcing you to open your eyes and look down at him. “Don’t slow down, baby, you want me to fill you up right? Well, keep going.” He chokes you slightly as you whimper. 

“Yes..please cum with me..” 

He could see your breasts bouncing under your button down dress shirt from work, he could see them pop open one by one as you bounced faster. And your pussy, so warm, so tight around him. He can feel his tip twitch as you clench around him, threatening to coat your walls at any moment now.

“Oh my.. GodI!” Your head falls back. Sweat runs down into the crevice of your breasts. He grabs your waist with both hands, taking over to slam you down onto him at a faster pace. He thrusts into you aggressively, chasing after a high that he knows he’ll remember well after tonight.

If you thought you could drop him after this, you’d be so wrong. He’d never been happier, never been hungrier, never been more anxious to fuck someone into oblivion like this. He could keep going if you let him. He’d have to recover quickly just so he can do it all over again in minutes, it would be difficult, but it’s not impossible.. He had to do it for you.

“Cum for me, baby, I know you want to....yes good girl, so tight for me.” He pants, his voice is gravelly.

“Jaehyun!” You cried out one final time before his eyes flew open. 

No. 

Jaehyun looks up at his ceiling and feels his bed under him. It’s wet with his sweat.

His chest is heaving and his dick is painfully hard, sticking straight into the sheet above him. “Shit. It felt so real.” 

He closes his eyes and rounds his fist around his dick to relieve himself, still imagining you clenching around him so beautifully while in his car.

He groans and wipes his forehead once he’s done. “This is gonna be hard.” He knows he should respect your wishes to not see him again, but deep down he knows he will have to. He knows he’s in too deep, and letting go is impossible at this point.

[One Month Later]

Jaehyun tries to let you go, he doesn’t watch you anymore..well, not every night at least.

He told himself he was getting better, and if “getting better” included installing a tracking device on your cell phone to follow you instead of watching you outside work, then yes, yes he was “getting better.”

A guy in his gang that acted as a hacker sent a virus to your phone through a text message pretending to be a K-pop album sale link. And just as he expected, you got too excited and clicked it without thinking. By the time you realized it was a scam, it was too late. He was in. You shrugged your shoulders and went about your day like nothing happened.

He didn’t track you every day but just knowing that he could when he wanted to was enough for him.

He had just welcomed a shipment with his guys, when he decided to take a break and check on you. His brows furrow when he notices you’ve stopped by a particular place between home and work once again. What could this place be? A new friend? Or.. a new man? No, you wouldn’t do that to him..or would you?

He jumps into his car and tells his guys to finish everything up before speeding away.

When he gets to his apartment, he looks the address up and finds that it’s an apartment building that belongs to a wealthy banker.

He bites his lip as he contemplates what on Earth you could want with a banker.

He relaxes into his computer chair and shrugs it off. He shouldn’t be intruding like this, it isn’t right. He’ll let you handle whatever it is you’re doing. It must be important and necessary. So he doesn’t let it bother him…that is until one day when you have a date with the man.

He watched you go out with the banker that aged you by at least 15 years. You wore a gorgeous red silk dress and did your hair up. Your skin looked immaculate and your smile shone brightly in the dim lighting of the restaurant. He watched from outside, holding himself back from marching in there and crashing the date. If Mr. Bank thought he was gonna get lucky tonight, he was very wrong.

You smile and laugh with him so much, Jaehyun can’t take it any more. He drives away.

A few hours later, you enter your apartment and kick your heels off. You shimmy your coat off before walking into the kitchen to get yourself some water. 

“Where were you?” A deep voice asks from the shadows of your kitchen.

You jump up and walk backwards. “WHO-“

Jaehyun steps out with arms crossed and knitted brows. His hair is styled back to reveal his forehead, and grey shadow rests under both eyes like he hasn’t slept in days.

He still looks handsome though, his black T-shirt clinging onto his toned biceps.

“Jesus Christ!! Jaehyun WHAT THE HELL?” You quickly turn the light switch on then turn to your handbag, fumbling around for your pepper spray.

“It’s 3 fucking A.M. and you’re just now getting home.” He tilts his head, confused as to why you act like he’s intruding.

Your mouth falls open, the audacity of this man.

“Are you crazy? That’s it, I’m calling the police.” You reach for your cell phone in your bag, but as you search for it, Jaehyun walks up to you and grabs your wrist.

He quickly places your hand behind your back and backs you into the wall.

Your eyes widen as he towers over you. 

“Answer the question first.” He grumbles, looking down on you like you’re some kind of criminal that’s been caught stealing.

You shake your head and gasp. “I don’t have to answer to you! I’m a grown woman!”

Jaehyun smirks as his eyes trace downward, floating from your lips to your neck and finally to your pronounced cleavage.

“This is a really nice dress, y/n, did he like it?” His eyes are filled with fire and jealousy. He looks almost disgusted as he thinks about you giving your body to someone else.

Your eyebrows raise. “You’re still following me? You’re insane!” You struggle to pull your hand away, but you pound against his chest with your other hand. He quickly grabs it by the wrist and places it above your head, like it’s nothing. His neck cranes down to get closer to your face.

“Let me go!” you yell. 

He shakes his head. “Not until you answer me.”

“Somebody help me!”

He can’t help but chuckle. “Even if someone comes, do you really think they can help you? Do you want to watch another person die, y/n?”

You swallow hard, and even though he is frightening at this moment, you feel hot and lustful with the amount of power he has over you.

“What’s your problem? First, you say you regret meeting me, and now, you’re following me every day! I can't keep doing this! So what if I moved on? Yeah I fucked another man, now what? You gonna kill me?”

Jaehyun flips you around so he’s pressed against your back and you’re pressed in with both hands held by him.

You grunt as your cheek hits the wall.

Jaehyun leans into your ear and whispers. “Mr. Bank loves that cheap cologne on his dresser. I see him use it every day. But it’s funny because I don’t smell it on you. And that’s how I know you’re lying.”

Chills run up your spine.

“W-we took a shower together, did you forget that I like doing it that way?” You smirk. Jaehyun’s grip tightens as he becomes even more infuriated.

You were lying, but you liked to see him get riled up, maybe just maybe, he’d leave you alone so you could forget about him, so you didn’t have to touch yourself to the thought of him, so you didn’t have to look at the empty chair in your bakery in hopes of seeing him there one night.

“You’re intent on pushing my buttons..even with you pressed up against the wall..even with your hands behind your back. Aren’t you afraid of how bad it’ll get for you?” 

You chuckle. “Are you threatening me because I just had the best sex of my life?”

Jaehyun picks you up off of the wall and lays you down onto the counter face first with a hard push.

“The best huh?” He flips the bottom of your dress up to expose your ass in your thong. He then taps two fingers against your clothed folds, you jump slightly at the unexpected contact. “And yet..your panties are still intact and you’re walking just fine.” 

He continues to rub his fingers against you, pressing them in just barely. You whimper quietly. “Your skin is cold. Your thighs are dry and you’re reacting to my simple touch. You smell like you did the first time like grapefruit and berries..seems to me you’re just as untouched as the Virgin Mary.” 

Jaehyun whispers so deeply, you can’t help but grow wet. Damn it, he really knew you like the back of his hand.

“And if it was the best, why were you able to go back to your place? Why didn’t you just sleep there in hopes for round two?” He still drags his fingers in and out, teasing his digits along your opening by pushing them in slowly.

“Unlike you, he begged me to stay tonight but I told him “no, I have to be at work in the morning.” You let out, you try to have a sturdy voice as you slowly unreel from his long fingers.

“Please, y/n, the more you lie, the longer this will take. You’re not the whore you claim to be..” he whispers against the back of your neck, giving you chills once more, but you shake them off and speak strongly.

“You don’t know me! I did unimaginable things with him tonight!” You wiggle to try to escape him, but the strong 6-foot something man doesn’t budge.

“Oh is that so? Show me.” He leans back and presses your wrists down with one hand while unbuckling his belt with the other. He then ties your hands behind your back with it and steps back. He sits at your dining table and waits for you to walk over.

“I’d need my hands, Jaehyun.” You roll your eyes.

“Come on y/n, see how much you can do without them..” he taps his thigh.

You sigh and walk over to him. Why did he have this control over you? What if he just ends up leaving again?

“I shouldn’t do anything for you, you’re cruel.” 

Jaehyun’s low eyes trace over your body in the red silk dress as you walk over to him. “But are you doing anything for me, per se? No baby, you’re gonna use me to satisfy yourself after a disappointing date.”

His hands can’t help but find your waist. He forces you down onto his thigh but doesn’t do anything other than look into your wide eyes.

You look onto his neck and broad shoulders, you smell his simple and fresh cologne. You wish you could run your hands through his full head of hair and intertwine your fingers on it as you go dizzy.

He lets your waist go. “Or...you can just sit here and tell me you hate me. I won’t force you to do anything you don’t want to, you know that.”

Your mouth falls open as you look at his lips.

“Go on..I’m listening.” He leans back and tilts his head slightly, looking down onto you with those low bedroom eyes. His gaze makes you tremble.

You’re so turned on from his touch, you continue moving against his thigh. He’d gotten you this far, why not finish it?

“I hate you because you won’t leave me alone. You send mixed signals. One day you want me, the next day you say it’s unrealistic to be with me. Make up your damn mind.” The friction of his thigh against your opening makes you light headed, but you push on.

“Before we do this again..I need to know what the hell you want from me, do you want me in your life or not?!”

“Y/n..of course I want you in my life...it’s just not safe for you..”

“Don’t you think I know that? I’ll be fine.”

He shakes his head. “I answered your question, you should answer mine..why are you home so late? What business do you have with that man?” He clenches his thigh and the sudden action makes you moan and shut your eyes tightly, you move faster.

“Jaehyun...it’s none of your business.”

He knew you were trying to get close to the bank manager so you could get another loan for your business, you needed to make improvements in the kitchen, decorations, flooring etc. and the money you made wasn’t cutting it. You figured that if you could find the right man to seduce, maybe you could get what you needed quickly.

Jaehyun knew this because he had seen the Google searches on your phone that went from “how to get a loan.” to “how to best seduce a man.” Hence, the red silk dress you wore, the glam hair, the intoxicating perfume that was quickly seducing even him as well, the high heels you wore to bring out your curves, and of course, the bra that made your cleavage noticeable to even the stars above.

“..let me protect you..and I’ll give you everything you need.” He kisses your neck and whispers into your ear while bringing one of your straps down your arm. He starts to kiss your shoulder.

You move faster on his thigh, swiveling your hips as his grip becomes tighter. “..that’s easier said than done..I want...I need to be completely yours, I don’t need a bodyguard.” You whimper and moan as he sucks your neck. Sweat builds onto your forehead.

“I don’t need your protection, I need your love.” You say breathily before finally releasing on his thigh. You rest your head on his shoulder, trembling while feeling your legs weaken.

He looks into your wet eyes and caresses your cheek while zipping down your dress with his other hand.

He then yanks your dress down to reveal your hard nubs. His hands cup your breasts, massaging them before tracing his thumbs over the peaks. “So beautiful, and only for me.”

He sucks them one by one, caressing them with one hand as the other grips your thigh, hard, so hard you know you’ll be sore for days. You groan in pain from his fingertips pressing in deep, and if your hands weren’t tied behind your back, you would’ve pushed him away.

He doesn’t let up, guiding your body forward and backward so you continue to leak all over his sweatpants. “Jaehyun!” You cry out in sensitivity, you cum again easily but he doesn’t stop. He won’t let you go, he continues to flick his tongue against your breasts. Your back arches, your clit is stimulated once more by his thigh, but it isn’t enough. 

He lifts you up easily and lays you down onto the table. He wants to make use of his time with you while you are bound, so he slowly drags your thong down your legs before throwing it to the side.

“Stay still..” he commands as your legs wiggle in an effort to get away from him. You whimper as he presses his fingers and thumbs into your thighs to spread you further apart.

He licks and sucks your clit as his fingers dive in deep. Your entrance, already sopping but welcoming him nonetheless. Your back arches again. “Jaehyun!” You cry out as you watch him devour you. His dark eyes lock with yours as he groans.

The tip of his tongue traces over your sweet spot as you throw your head back. You cum again, struggling to break out of his belt and grab his hair. He doesn’t stop, licking up everything that escapes as tears escape your eyes.

“Please.. I can’t- slower.” You plead, but he doesn’t care. He wraps his arms around your legs to keep them open and fixed around his head.

“Mmmm you taste so good, baby, and you’re all mine.” He chuckles then flattens his tongue against you.

He wants to make up for all the time he’d lost with you, he wants to consume you forever, to taste what he’s been craving all his life. He eats you out until you’re begging him to stop. Your wrists are tired of fighting against his belt, you try to kick his shoulders away again, but he simply smirks and grips your ankles tightly. 

“Don’t disobey me like that again, sweetheart.” His eyes dark and threatening as he looks up through his lashes.

You can’t stop moaning as your eyes roll to the back of your head and your back arches, threatening to snap completely.

He finally finishes when he’s had enough. He stands up from the chair, flipping your body over and lifting one of your legs over the table. He pushes the waistband of his pants down, releasing his hard member and grabs your waist. He runs his cock against your slit, parting it slightly with the head to gather your slick. 

“Gonna be a good girl for me right? Gonna follow my orders and cum when I tell you to?” He asks lowly.

“Yes! Yes..Jaehyun..I need-“

He pulls you into him, your ass shakes as you moan. The angle created by one leg lifted drives you crazy as he pushes himself deeper and deeper. You can’t stop yourself from clenching.

“Fuck..so good..cum with me, don’t let anything escape..I wanna see you hold it in for me..”

He buries himself in deep with each stroke, allowing you to feel every judge and vein as he runs his dick against your velvety walls. The table shakes with each thrust, he groans when he feels you clenching again. He moves faster, pressing his hand into the small of your back to keep you still. 

“Yes, don’t..stop!” You release onto him and chant his name as he moves in and out slowly.

“That’s it..such a good girl for me..” he rubs your clit to coax another orgasm out of you despite you being sensitive. 

You can feel his abs on your back, you can’t take anymore. You open your hands and try to push him away. He pushes in deep to make you squirm. “Give me one more, okay..you’re my slut tonight, gonna do whatever I say, right?”

“Jaehyun!” Your hands fail to apply any pressure.

He chuckles. “Are you disobeying me? Tsk tsk..you act like you can’t take it, yet you’re gripping me like it’s yours..”

He rubs his fingers in circles with more force and you can feel your essence dripping down your legs continuously now.

He thrusts faster and harder, the entire table moves as he pounds you like there’s no tomorrow. “Cum with me..cum with me right now..I’m gonna fill you up so you don’t forget who owns this pussy. so full..so warm, you’ll never give it to anyone else, that’s a fucking order, understand?..”

You can’t think clearly, you become dizzy. 

Jaehyun grabs your waist tightly to slam your ass against his pelvis and reaches his other hand around your throat to choke you. “Y/n! Do you understand?!” 

You struggle to breathe,  but nod and cum again. ”y-yes! Yes, oh my god!”

A loud groan leaves him while his movement stutters. He collapses on top of you as he empties himself finally.

After a few minutes, he sits back into the chair, turns you around and brings your limp body onto his lap as you pant. He holds you close by wrapping you in his arms, tracing his fingers delicately against your spine. 

“Jaehyun..just let me love you..please.” You rest your head onto his shoulder.

He does love you, everything about you makes him ache, you make him soft and remind him that he has a heart. He’d let his mind wander too many times, he let himself think of a world where the two of you could live together, have a few pets, get married, have kids..all sorts of “regular” things.

But love? Jaehyun is left speechless, he doesn’t know what to say, but he also doesn’t want to break your heart again. He was beyond worried for you. He unbuckles his belt from your wrists and helps you up.

He stands the both of you up then sits you back down. He looks down at you as you wait for his answer with pleading, wet eyes.

He shakes his head. “I’m sorry.” He fixes his pants.

You stand up on wobbly legs, take his head into your hands and kiss him hard. “You don’t have to be sorry, just give us a chance.” You say once you break the kiss.

He kisses you back before pulling away “I can’t.” 

Your mouth falls open in shock. “What exactly am I to you? Just a quick fuck and nothing else? Just tell me!” You turn away from him.

He feels his heart break again. “No! No..you’re much more than that..it’s-“

You turn back to him. “What? What the hell is it, Jaehyun?”

“I-I don’t know, I have to go.” He can’t look into your eyes anymore.

“No..don’t.” You grab his hand and tug him back. “Not again.”

“Y/n..I’m ....” he closes his eyes and shakes his head, keeping you from seeing the tears in his eyes. Why was he getting emotional?

The truth was Jaehyun had heard those exact words before. 

“no..don’t” 

It was the last thing his mom said to him. He was 16 and hell bent on doing his own thing. He ran away from home and decided to live a life of crime. He was stupid and broke her heart in the process, leaving her to die at home alone a few months later. At 12 years old, he had made a promise to protect and care for her when his father abandoned the two of them to take care of his other family.

Jaehyun needed to make more money and by the time he was 16, his friend offered an opportunity to make more money than he could ever imagine. It’s what he needed to do for himself and his mom, or at least that’s what he thought at the time. He didn’t know that all his mom wanted was for him to be safe and to grow up as a hardworking man she could be proud of. He disappointed her..and he feared he’d disappoint you too one day.

You sigh and let him go. “I don’t hate you Jaehyun, I just don’t understand you..”

He turns away from you to not show weakness once again. “I wish I understood myself, I wish I didn’t hurt you.” He leaves, slamming the door shut as you sink down into the chair.

[hannie-dul-set]

— arranged by: member (eldest to youngest) | date (latest to oldest) | type (full-length to drabbles to blurbs) i don’t recommend reading my older works because they’re terrible. still putting them on here for the sake of bookkeeping | last updated: 23.12.18 

BLUE HYDRANGEAS. wherein this time, it’s your breath that gets taken away and not the other way around.

PAIRING. lee taeyong x reader. GENRE. romance, humor, light angst, and of course the overall theme of the event  — dumbassery (this time, by y/n), florist! taeyong, contract killer! reader. WARNINGS. murder, death i mean lol, violence, swearing, mentions of blood, knives, & guns. WORD COUNT. 2.2k.

MISSED TIMINGS. drabble game; “do i look like i’ve moved on?”

PAIRING. lee taeyong x reader. GENRE. post breakup! au, angst. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 887.

CAUGHT RED HANDED. all you wanted to do was take a picture of the handsome law student during your train ride home. you did not expect things to end up like this.

PAIRING. kim doyoung x reader. GENRE. fluff, humor. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 804.

A FOOL’S GAME. were you the fool for being blind to his intentions? or was it he who forgot what his intentions were in the first place?

PAIRING. jung jaehyun x reader. GENRE. royal! au, drama, romance, angst, slight comedy. WARNINGS. swearing, mentions of death. WORD COUNT. 27.4k.

CONTRARIETY & CONFLUENCE. there was not an instance in your life where your judgement was proven to be mistaken— especially with regards to infatuations outside of your own. after an unpredicted introduction with a far too remarkable farm boy, you took it upon yourself to find a suitable match for him, not realizing that perhaps this time; your usual correct judgements might have been incorrect.

PAIRING. jung jaehyun x reader. GENRE. emma! au, matchmaking! au, strangers to lovers! au, slowburn, period romance, humor, one suggestive scene, very very tiny angst. WARNINGS. implied and borderline smut. WORD COUNT. 16.9k.

[doctor! au] [richkid! au] [sugardaddy! au] [bf discourse] [bf discourse]

PUT A FINGER DOWN. wherein mark lee finds you drunk for the first time and promises to himself that he should make sure that you never get wasted ever again.

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. college! au, humor, fluff, suggestive, drunken mistakes that would probably make you cry in real life. WARNINGS. swearing, alcohol consumption, mature content (sexual & explicit jokes about fingers and — u get the gist) please read at your own discretion. WORD COUNT. 1.6k.

BIBINGKA. legend says that if you finish all nine night masses of simbang gabi, your wish will be granted. mark only hopes that it’s actually true because that’s his last chance in getting you to notice him (but wait— shouldn’t his wish only come true after the nine days?)

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. christmas! au, crush! au, lots of fluff, mark is a piner, mark is also very awkward, some filipino references and customs. WARNINGS. swearing, religious themes. WORD COUNT. 6.9k.

HOW TO GET THE GUY. drabble game; “why haven’t you kissed me yet?”

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. college! au, friends to lovers! au, fluff, humor. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 1.2k.

IS IT BECAUSE YOU’RE ALWAYS THINKING ABOUT ME? video call with your best friend, mark lee.

PAIRING. mark lee x reader. GENRE. long distance (not so relationship) relationship, mutual pining, angsty themes. WARNINGS. none. WORD COUNT. 428.

[hotsauce! au] [bf discourse] [bf discourse] [coworkers! au] 

DO YOU WANT ME (DEAD)? murder and making out.

PAIRING. huang renjun x reader. GENRE. high school! au, suggestive. WARNINGS. attempted murder, mentions of blood and self injury, veryy descriptive kissing, mc has a few screws lost, swearing, depictions of unstable behavior. WORD COUNT. 1.8k.

[friends to lovers! au] [skater! au] [skater! au] [tough love! au] [mermaid! au] [tutor! au]

I (HAVE/HAD) A CRUSH ON YOU. running into a past crush at your best friend’s birthday party wouldn’t have been so bad if he wasn’t— well— all that.

PAIRING. lee jeno x reader GENRE. crush! jeno, college! au, rom-com, mildly suggestive moments. WARNINGS. swearing, smoking, mentions of dicks and balls (sorry), an awful amount of men and boys being boys. WORD COUNT. 5.8k

I’LL TAKE YOUR WORD FOR IT AND NO ONE ELSE’S. maybe snooping through your friend’s phone wasn’t that much of a good idea. or maybe it was. either way, you didn’t regret it.

PAIRING. lee jeno x reader. GENRE. friends to something, fluff, lots of bickering. WARNINGS. swearing, invasion of privacy(?) lmao. WORD COUNT. 2.1k.

IT’S FOR YOU. all it took was the heavy rainfall from the sky to clear up your misunderstandings.

PAIRING. lee jeno x reader. GENRE. e2l (sort of), fluff. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 1.5k.

[ceo! au] [spacecore! aesthetic] [hotsauce! au] [bf discourse]

KATHANG ISIP. musings of the mind and heart are always dangerous— it’s easy to get carried away and get lost in your made up scenarios, rose colored wishes, and fleeting daydreams of what you thought would be. that is until reality hits you like the crashing of an ocean’s waves.

PAIRING. lee donghyuck x reader. GENRE. roommates! au, college! au, brief roadtrip! au, angst, fluff, humor. also let’s pretend hyuck cannot drive and that his hometown is elsewhere for the sake of plot, thanks. WARNINGS. swearing, alcohol consumption, one descriptive kissing scene, lots and lots of overthinking. WORD COUNT. 19.8k

DATING 101. drabble game; “you’re not very intimidating”.

PAIRING. lee donghyuck x reader. GENRE. highschool! au, fluff, slight suggestive, slight humore, wannabe badboy! haechan. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 678.

SHAMELESS. drabble game; “did you just— did you just kiss me?” “yeah” “do it again”.

PAIRING. lee donghyuck x reader. GENRE. enemies! au, fluff, humor, co-worker! haechan. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 997.

[grunge! aesthetic] [lipstick! au] [bf discourse]

CAN’T HANDLE THIS. how are you supposed to explain that you and na jaemin started dating just to prove each other wrong and ended up catching feelings.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. strangers to lovers, college! au, matchmaking! au, yet another richkid! au, jaemin is an asshole again, romance, humor. WARNINGS. excessive swearing, a near death experience, drinking and smoking, more than a handful of illegal shit, mentions of vomit, blood, violence, too much sexual tension it’s unhealthy, again jaemin is kind of a dick but he’s an attractive dick, jaemin also likes it when you tell him his personality is trash. WORD COUNT. 16k.

IT TAKES FOUR YEARS TO GROW A PEACH TREE. humans are fickle in nature— it takes a great deal of patience, fortitude, and devotion to have a heart that remains constant. that or having an absolute tolerance for all pain and torment that comes in exchange.

so when you are once again met by the ex-boyfriend that you’ve desperately avoided for four years after tearing up his heart, it becomes a test of how much you can endure, and how much more you’re willing to endure after realizing that you’re still in love with him when his love has already been weathered down.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader GENRE. exes to lovers! au, college! au, romance, angst, fluff, humor, hurt/comfort, SLOW AS FUCK BURN, pining, lots of pushing and pulling, the “its always been you” trope, a modern retelling-ish of jane austen’s persuasion. WARNINGS. swearing, heartbreak, alcohol consumption, parental pressure, stress and anxiety, one scene with a nosebleed, jaemin is kind of a dick in the beginning, mentions of hospitals, one scene with a creep, one makeout scene, ghosting, breakup, a lot of me projecting. WORD COUNT. currently 54k.

ARAW-ARAW. mahiwaga— someone or something that you’ll choose every single day no matter the circumstance. and for you, that was na jaemin. even if time decides to set you apart.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. childhood friends to lovers! au, college! au, romance, slow-ish burn, fluff, humor, tiny angst, biology major jaemin and art major mc HEHE. WARNINGS. excessive swearing, insecurities, some sex jokes LMAO, i project a lot in this i’m sorry JSFJG. WORD COUNT. 14.5k.

US, AGAIN. they say history repeats itself, but you’d like to disagree. you had to disagree. history changes, even if you had to force it. but when all your attempts to twist fate were met by nothing but the flashing recurrences of the past, what were you supposed to do?

or, wherein you try everything in your power to have nothing to do with na jaemin, but na jaemin wants nothing but you.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. college! au, historical! au, soulmate! au, past lives, forbidden love stuff, reincarnation, romance, drama, humor, angst, fluff, looots of flashbacks, this is an entire kdrama, very loosely inspired by the webtoon “see you in my 19th life”. WARNINGS. (updated as the series goes on) character death/s, night terrors, murder, terminal illness, hospital mentions, gun mentions, inaccurate depictions of the joseon era for the sake of plot lmao. WORD COUNT. currently 4.9k.

TOP OF THE WORLD. things had always been the same in the world of na jaemin— him sitting on a throne above everyone else. that was the natural order. but the world as jaemin knew it began to shake after a few fated encounters with someone at the bottom of the food chain.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. private school! au, one sided e2l lmao, a dash of fake dating, romance, heavily suggestive themes, lots and lots of sexual tension and power dynamics. WARNINGS. bullying (lots of it), public humiliation, mildly nsfw, borderline smut, implied smut, swearing, jaemin being a literal asshole. WORD COUNT. 15.6k.

HOSTILITY. making out with the person you hate the most.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. suggestive, stageplay! au. WARNINGS. making out, swearing, reader tells jaem to k himself, reader spits on jaem’s face and he does something…questionable. WORD COUNT. 438.

DO IT AGAIN. maybe you should have paid more attention to your boyfriend. he isn’t always petty, but he has his limits.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. fluff, established relationship! au. WARNINGS. alcohol consumption, kissing. WORD COUNT. 576.

DON’T THINK, JUST DO. an overthinker, a piece of advice, a sudden confession, and a subtle meltdown.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. high school! au, f2l, fluff, humor. WARNINGS. swearing. WORD COUNT. 1.6k.

WHAT BEST FRIENDS DO. drabble game; “i need a hug”.

PAIRING. na jaemin x reader. GENRE. high school! au, maybe secret relationship! au, fluff, light humor. WARNINGS. swearing, mentions of food. WORD COUNT. 988.

[secret agents! au] [richkid! au] [boyfriend! au] [neighbor! au] [spiderman! au] [softcore! aesthetic] [racer! au] [vampire! au] [bf discourse] [bf discourse] [best friends to lovers! au] [reincarnation! au]

[johnny royal! au] [yuta punk! aesthetic] [yuta bf discourse] [kun richkid! au] [jungwoo royalcore! aesthetic] [jisung bf discourse]

NCT & WAYV MASTERLIST. © hannie-dul-set.

[jaemrkist]

[3:30 pm]

“it’ll just feel like a pinch, i promise” you say to your boyfriend, jaehyun, as he waits to get his helix pierced. when you guys had first met he complimented yours and said he had always wanted one but was too nervous to get it. after dating for 9 months you told him he should get one so you guys can have matching piercings. he thought it was so cute to see how excited you got talking about the idea of matching piercings. jaehyun had told you he was nervous that it'll hurt or he'll regret it but you reassured him that it would be fine and he'd look even more attractive with it. he grabs your hand as the piercer tells him he's about to pierce the ear. as the needle goes through, jaehyun squeezes your hand a little tighter and then releases when he realizes it's done. “you look so good with it babe” you told him as the piercer handed him the mirror. the look on his face gave you butterflies. he looked so happy with it and then he hugged you. as you guys left the place he asked to take a selfie to show off your matching piercings. he gave you a quick kiss on the cheek as he took the picture which made you laugh and playfully hit his shoulder. he laughed back at you and you swear you couldn’t be more in love with him.