#just now realising i could also put this on my fanworks blog but whatever

[inky-thoughts]

How to Organize a Zine 101

Hey guys!

Since I'm almost through with my very first zine that I organised myself, I just realised how many mistakes you can make without even knowing, and I learned so much within the last few months where a lot was kind of trial and error. So I thought, you guys might like to learn more about this, and I could share my experiences and newly gained knowledge! Maybe this helps if you are looking into organising your own first zine.

If you have any tips and tricks yourself you'd like to share, let me know, I’m excited to hear about them!

I am going to go through the different steps and phases that you should take into consideration, so this might get a small series of some sort? I hope you're up for this.

Also a small disclaimer:

I'm mostly talking about fanzines that have multiple contributors, and it will focus more on artists/illustrators and writers as that is where my experience lies. I have contributed on several free e-zines as well as a printed charity zine, and now have organised my first printed for-profit zine as well.

Phase 1: The Planning

This might sound really obvious and maybe silly, but there are quite a few things that you should take into consideration before just starting a project that might overwhelm you easily. Don't already head off and create a twitter account before you haven't sat down and thought about these questions first!

First of all, you should think about the zine itself:

What topic/theme should it have?

If it is a fanzine: What ships/characters/... should be the focus?

What format does your zine have (printed/e-zine/both)?

What should be included in the zine? (Illustrations, comics, writing, photographs, ... all of them?)

How many contributors/pieces do you want in your finished zine? (especially important for printed zines)

Do you want to have additional merch, e.g. bookmarks, stickers, charms, postcards, ... , that people can purchase with your zine in a bundle?

How are the specs (how many pieces per creator/how long is one piece especially for writers)?

Is it a for-profit, charity, or free zine?

After you now have a vague idea of what you want, you need to think about competition as well if you're not having a free online zine.

How big is the fandom/target group of the specific zine you want to make?

How old are they and how likely are they to spend money on your zine?

Are there only a few, but very dedicated fans?

How many contributors can you gather from the fandom? How is the general quality of fanworks?

Are there other zines that are similar or maybe with the same topic/theme/focus and what sets your zine apart from them?

Are there other zines going around at roughly the same time with the same target group, and should you perhaps wait a little so people can afford your zine again?

Is it a thriving fandom on the rise or has activity already peaked? If no fanzine: Is your theme at the pulse of time, or has some accute relevance to a lot of people?

Especially on tumblr, there are a few blogs entirely dedicated to zines and specifically fanzines. If tagged accordingly, they'll reblog all kinds of posts about a zine, but mostly Call for Submission, Zine Schedules, and Preorder Announcements (we will talk about these later on.) It is really helpful to check those out, sometimes there are even blogs solely about one fandom's projects, so it gets watered down even more. You can also test waters through polls etc. if you have a loyal followership that might just buy your stuff because it has you in or on it. However, I don't really find those very reliable.

The next questions are mainly about the doablity of the zine for you:

If there is any kind of production costs, do you have funds to cover them if the zine doesn't sell well enough?

Do you have anyone you can trust/are friends with who is also enthusiastic about your topic that they can help you?

How do you want to split work? How much do you want to contribute to the zine yourself?

Are you ready to make the commitment to dedicate basically every free minute of your life for the next 6+ month on this project? Are you in a relatively steady environment where you don't need to handle moving, changing jobs, schools, whatever at any point during your zine work?

I highly recommend you to at least have one other person to do the organisation with you, preferrably are two or even more.

Please do not underestimate the workload you'll get, even if it doesn't seem much at first, you will write so many e-mails because you need to get back to your contributors for one thing or another, you need to make sure the files are all correct, if you have writers you need beta-reading while also putting the zine together and finding a good printing service and making sure everyone is on time. For the last 6 months, this zine was basically my job, because it is just that, just without a clear salary, or none at all.

The next thing is kind of working out a schedule, with the rough stages/phases zine creations usually have.

Application/Gathering Contributors You have the option between public applications where people just send in portfolios and you pick from those, or you invite contributors you think are interested in the zine and you would like to have in it. Sometimes, there are zines that do both, but it's rather rare. There are some zines (usually free e-zines) that accept literally everyone who applies, and while it creates an opportunity for lesser known creators and beginners to gain a little exposure and experience, it doesn't necessarily mean that the overall quality of content is consistent and what you want to hold in your hands. I had applications open for a bit more than a month since I was very eager and didn't establish any kind of excitement or build-up thereof until finally applications open, but generally it's very common to have a full month to gather applications. The minimum should be 2 weeks, though. Also, don't let yourself be blinded by the sheer amount of applicants, especially in smaller fandoms, top tier creators are rather rare and everyone tries to get into a zine about something they love.

Curating Contributors If you don't have an Invite Only zine, you'll have a very busy time ahead now: You need to look through hundred or more applications and filter who is a fit for your zine, and who is not. Bear in mind that you aren't only looking for quality of work, but also which creator's style fits your zine best. Especially if you have several disciplines in your zine (e.g. illustrations and writing), I only can recommend to split the work load according to your speciality. That way you work faster and more efficient. Give yourself at least 2 weeks, the bigger/more popular the fandom, the longer it probably will take.

Sending Acceptance/Refusal E-Mails After you chose your pick, you'll need to let people know who's in, and who is not. I would advise to send out acceptance letters first, since there will be first dropouts immediately after you finally agreed on them. As soon as you got everyone to confirm their participation, take those who barely didn't make it and put them in for pinch-hitters. You will be surprised how many you'll probably need along the way. After they confirmed that yes, they'll be pinch-hitters, send out the rejection e-mails. I consider it curtesy to send them because as applicant, you really want to know where you're standing. Calculate roughly 1-2 weeks for the e-mails because things just tend to drag along and people need a long time to respond.

Confirmations This usually only applies if you offer people to make collaborations. They need to be able to check out who else is in the zine, who is up for collaboration, whose style suits them best to collab with, test the waters with each other, and usually should come up with an idea, so again 1-2 weeks would be needed for that. However, if you have got your contributors confirmed and just need the backup and refusal mails, just set those deadlines parallel.

1st Draft Depending on how much you're already asking for, you might want them 1-2 weeks after the rejection mails went out (if you really just want to know what kind of ideas people got), or up to a month if you want first sketches/summaries. The first draft is also helpful to see if two people got the same idea, and you can steer people a little bit into the "right direction."

2nd Draft Usually this is where at least 50-75% of the work should be done if you don't take a 3rd draft. Most common are 2 Drafts and the endproduct. Give people at least a month between 1st and 2nd Draft.

Final Draft This is when the finished pieces should be due. Depending on the time of the year, the contributors might be under a lot of stress, so set this deadline roughly 1 month after the 2nd Draft. You will be stressed, everyone else will be stressed, so give yourself the time you need. Also listen to your contributors and observe if there are a lot not cutting a deadline, then maybe push them back for another 1-2 weeks. It will make everyone more relaxed.

Touch-up Phase Especially with writers, you'll need at least 2 weeks to touch up the final draft they submitted.

Buffer Time (don't write that into the official schedule but definitely calculate with it) There will always be unexpected events that will require buffer times. You also will need time to put the zine together if you didn't work on designing the file beforehand while everyone else was creating. Still, you'll need to fix some things and polish the whole thing. Minimum buffer should be 1-2 weeks.

Contributor Preorders With printed zines, it is curtesy to give every contributor a printed copy of the zine for free with them only paying for shipping & handling. This kind of established itself as compensation for their work that usually ends up to be for free as most zines are either for charity or barely cover their production costs. To know who of your contributors even wants a copy, you should give them roughly 2-3 weeks to preorder. Having those exclusive orders helps you to divide between contributors and the regular costumer if you hold both at the same storefront.

Previews (+ Proofs) Before you're launching public preorders, dedicate at least 1 week to previews to get everyone hyped up. Contributors and the "official" zine site post excerps of zine pieces so people get an idea of what the feel of the zine is. If you already got proofs/samples printed until then, post pictures of those, too! If you don't post the link to the shop yet, there definitely wouldn't be a problem to have the previews start at the same time as the contributor preorders. That way, contributors also have the chance to get a glimpse at their peer's works.

Public Preorders Depending on how eager people are for your zine, you can leave preorders relatively short, but no less than 2 weeks if you don't get an insane amount of orders within the first couple of days. People must be able to check out prices and get their paycheck before preorders close again. Some zines have a stacked preorder system where the first X orders are cheaper, and then there will be leftovers or a second phase of preorders after the first bulk has been shipped. However, this doesn't happen very often. If you don't have a hugely popular zine or are cutting way too close to any important deadlines, consider having 3-4 weeks of preorders.

Production As soon as you got your numbers from the preorders, RUN AND PURCHASE EVERYTHING. Depending on where you get your zines printed (also don't forget the optional merch on this!), you can be ready to go within a week or even more than a month. Calculating with roughly 3 weeks if you're getting your stuff from mostly national level is a good rule of thumb, however shit happens all the time anyway, so to be safe use 4-8 weeks. Let your customers know immediately if there are any delays that weren't planned.

Shipping Depending on how many orders you've got, shipping can be a hassle and most likely will take up one week or longer. Since domestic shipping is fastest, ship international orders first, that way customers don't have the feeling that they're forgotten.

E-Zine Currently, a common trend is to first get the physical copies sold, and then sell e-zines to gather more money and cover leftover production costs of the printed zine. Especially international customers and college students prefer e-zines because of the incredibly high shipping rates around the globe. E-zines aren't linked to any production at all after you got the file put together, so if you set up your storefront with the download, everyone simply downloads it. You can have those open as you like, common is anything between 1-3 month and even a whole year. If no money is involved at all, a lot of zines just exist as a permanent free download in a dropbox or other cloud, so this is the least complicated process.

Conventions Really, it's not necessary to put this up in the schedule, but thinking about it might be helpful. If you have a physical zine, you and some contributors might want to sell it on conventions, so offering them to buy a bulk to a smaller rate can be helpful to spread the zine's exposure. We handled this with "buying on commission" - mainly the contributor only pays for the printing costs + shipping, and later will pay part of the profit back to you. Especially with international contributors, be aware of the longer shipping time. Also reprints might take their time. I personally made it a rule to order the reprints 3 months before the con, and reprints can be made up until one year, but really, you don't need to do this.

After you've got your rough schedule, I would advise you to already gather information on how to produce and spread the finished zine. This also helps to know how much you should have in your backup fund for the zine.

For physical zines/merch

Check out printing services! compare prices and quality as well as product range, and find out how long production takes

Find an online storefront where you want to sell it if you don't have one yet

Research on conventions and fairs where you might sell the zine

Learn about shipping rates and which company is suited best for your purpose

For e-zines

Research on your options:

If it's free, what cloud-service are you most comfortable with?

Find a dowload hosting platform you're comfortable with that also lets you charge per download

Is a round-mailing an option? if yes, do your research on online storefronts as well.

Advertising + Web Presence

This is basically finding your social media where you want to spread the word and store all the information of your zine. It is common for a zine with multiple contributors and mods to have its own web presence.

Tumblr and twitter are very popular for this as tumblr basically is a quick-for-setup homepage where you can spread information incredibly fast if you get to the right people, you have the option to answer questions people have regarding your zine, and twitter is nice and handy to keep applicants and potential customers updated. Also think about where you've got a large following and can advertise the zine yourself. Twitter/tumblr is not required, but most definitely helpful.

If you yourself aren't very known or popular, try to get more influencial people interested in participating, or simply promoting your zine. It definitely helps to have a larger audience. Also find out about the tags used by largely popular zines, and what you can learn from them. Learn how the fanproject blogs filter content they might reblog.

Things you also shouldn't underestimate is affiliations! If there is a zine/project with a largely similar forcus and theme, try to get on their better side, and help each other out. They might be your competition, but if you schedule your zine in a clever way, you won't need to worry about this at all since preorder phase won't overlap at all. They might help you advertise your zine while you do the same for them.

There are also forums on zines and fanzines, but I think nowadays it's rare that you'll go viral through those. I personally don't have any experience with those, so if anyone has, I'm happy to hear about it!

next >>

Masterpost

[dockofkinkshame]

yeah i watched dramarama

it’s so weird not having an established narrative structure from the get go, like every other season spends the first episode going into detail on how the show works and sets up season long arcs and goals. i’m still really bummed that they’re ditching the reality show aspect of the show when that’s the POINT of total drama, the one thing setting it apart form other cartoons. if they’re not gonna kill off a toddler every episode, i thought this ep would at least be the first day of daycare or something so we see the characters meeting for the first time and there’d be some end series goal like a toddler graduation ceremony or some shit idk!!! just jumping into the middle of it when everyone already knows each other and there’s not any acknowledgement of why a chef is running a daycare or anything like i found it so hard to get into the ep. maybe it’ll turn out this is just a random episode that leaked and not the first episode? idk

im so bummed there isn’t ANY competition aspect to the show :( like even if it was one of them gets sent to time out by the end of each episode, or someone gets a gold star every week and whoever has the most by the end gets smth, WHATEVER! god like give me stakes. who VERSUS who are we doing it VERSUS

and with the confessional cam bits like they don’t make sense anymore if it’s not a show?? they could’ve done a mockumentary style format like the office crossed with dance moms where we’re watching chef try to handle all these fockin kids or whatever. there are so many PLACES to take the reality tv parody cartoon format in 2018 since reality tv looks really different now compared to 2007, there aren’t many competition shows anymore but there’s tons of that fly on the wall format. god there are so many ways they could have done this show to appease me personally and they didn’t pick one i hate fresh

the pacing is so bizarre like simultaneously way too much happening at once and also nothing? lol? and also so few of the jokes landed for me, i was laughin with chef ragging on noah but that was it really. and not even that the jokes were targeting a younger demo or anything, but the writing just felt lazy like i’m sure owen has delivered each of those punchlines at other points throughout the series.if he’s gonna be the main character again p l e a s e give him new shit to say,,

it just blows my fucking mind that this show has eight series now and fresh still don’t know how to write a fucking cartoon like jsakh;jlh why are they straight up choosing when and where to put effort in. who is paying them to continue. it’s such a non-toyetic franchise and i can’t imagine any season picking up new audiences literally how does td make money.

the animation is REALLY nice, wonder if they have a higher budget for it with doing 11 min episodes? the designs are cute enough, i like the redesigned outfits that most of the girls got. i realise that most of them prob got redesigned cause their original teen outfits would’ve been too sexualised lmao fresh,, i wish they just overhauled everyone’s designs though instead of shrinking everyone else like duncan looks so fuckin bad hgdgsfhxnf

i really can’t figure out who this show is for. td was always trying to appeal to a teen audience so whoever has that nostalgia fondness for tdi from 2007 is gonna be TOO fuckin old to care about this muppet baby reboot or are gonna be a dweeb on tumblr and blog about it. and i can’t imagine this inviting new audiences cause there’s a baby with a fuckin green mohawk and choker that no one is addressing. these were all existing problems anyway im ramblin

if fresh know what a nintendo switch is we’re definitely getting babies with smartphones and they WILL be making dated meme refs, harold will dab.

i can’t believe that leaked script was real and duncan did just? steal chef’s eye? i hate when ppl are like haha the animators must have been on drugs when they came up with this cartoon but honestly fresh is it crack? is that what you smoke? you smoke crack?

im still yellin that they pulled jude in from an alt universe and he doesn’t even have a line in the first ep like. gag.

idk im happy with new td content honestly and i hope it’ll inspire more fanwork like havin backstory fodder and all. i feel like i’ve only said negative things so far LMAO but honestly i knew this wouldn’t be my cup of tea so much so i’m not too bothered since i didn’t have huge expectations or anything. probably gonna keep watching in october or whenever cause i’m interested in character interactions at least and i wanna see more chef. also did they change chef’s voice actor? he was still good but :(

[seethedivide]

I really love your blog, especially because you give such detailed and kind answers and I am looking for some kind of answers, so I hope it's okay if I spam your inbox a bit. I think this ask is going to be a bit long, so I apologise in advance. So I went through your Vulpes tags the last few months and I think you mentioned that the interpretations of Vulpes' character is different from canon!Vulpes, but you can't pin exactly down his overall personality. Has this changed now a bit? I mean, do

I mean, do you have a better idea now what Vulpes’ overallcharacter entails? I, in all honesty, didn’t, I really don’t understand muchabout him to be honest. One anon also asked you about Joshua Graham and womenand I wonder what your stance on this is in regards to Vulpes as well. On theone hand, he has to be sexist, no single doubt about that. This attitude wasingrained in him since childhood after all. Not to mention that he comparesNitpon as a “town of whores.” And there was also a quote, either direct or indirect, where he putsprostituites on the same pedestal as murderers or the likes (it might have beenin Nipton). However, he also praised Martina’s skills in the Finger ofSuspicion and he only praised Caesar and Lanius so far (although praisingLanius was more of a farce, I believe - he seems to detest this guy). But onepoint doesn’t have to override the other one, of course, and that’s certainlynot the case with Vulpes. And then again, it was Curtis who knew Martina, somaybe Vulpes impression of herstems from Curtis’ point of view (which is kind of interesting - until oneremembers that he unleashed the Fiends on Camp MCC and was probably full awarethat Betsy or other women would be raped during that attack). And what makesyou think he attacked Nipton? I know, it should be obvious, one because todiminish the NCR’s morale and because of his stance on hedonism and crime, buteven here I think Vulpes’ only reason was “might is right” more thananything. After all, he was pretty hypocritcal in everything he stated. Disloyalty?Vulpes arranges a contract with the Omertas, Khans and the Fiends and thenbetrays them (the Fiends might be an exception, as they were annihilated byCaesar’s orders due to his dissappointment and disregard of them). Prositution?The Legion revels in sexual slavery, and unlike Rose and Sylvia, many women inthe Legion are pressured into it. Gambling? Okay, the Legion officially barelygambles, but there’s still some hypocrisy there. And about the disloyalty part- he send two of his own Legionnaries to their death and didn’t even informthem about it - no, he even implied that they would come out alive. There was aletter Vulpes gave them where he even mentioned that they should report back tothem after they opened the radiactive barrels, knowing full well that theywon’t survive this mission. But I think I can say one certain thing about him.He views everyone, and possibly even himself, as a tool. And as a Jack of Clubshe is particularly set to realise his dreams and agenda in an almostdelusional fashion. Sorry for writing so much and thanks for reading my ask(it’s long and baseless as hell), regardless if you can/want to answer it. Oh,and just one more thing: According to Boxcars, he drew a lottery ticket foreach person’s fate, but when the ticket for mayor Steyn came up, he simplyburned him. Boxcars mentioned only three kind of fates Niptoners would face:crucifiction, decapitation and slavery. But nothing about burning people, whichprobably means that Vulpes had a special kind of hatred towards Steyn andthought these kind of means were not punishment enough for him. Ironically,Steyn’s fate was the only one not determined by a lottery ticket. Not tomention that Vulpes stated that only “some are guilty, but not all ofthem” and then put them all through his kind of twisted game. Possibly,because he thought they wer guilty by association?

Hey! Thank youfor your long, well thought out question.

I have to sayright at the beginning that I have never been a Legion fan and therefore haven’texplored their concept as extensively as some other aspects of the game. Vulpeshasn’t been on my mind very frequently, so perhaps my answer won’t satisfy you.

Vulpes Inculta and Identification With The Aggressor 

It appears,however, that my interpretation of Vulpes is not shared by many people, or atleast I know of a few that are sure that I am wrong. I perceive Vulpes as afundamentally brainwashed character, brainwashed to the extent of losing hisidentity. Most people appear to believe that Vulpes is too smart to be in sucha position and prefer to think of him as a master mind, as a tactical genius.However, my interpretation does not necessarily deny that he is indeed a geniusin what he does. I am just saying that he does it not because of his reasons,but because of the reasons that other people have put in his head. I see him asa master mind, but not as a grey emissary that is capable of manipulatingeveryone and everywhere, including Caesar, just so he can achieve his goals.

And since we arespeaking of his goals – what are those, exactly? Is there some indication,somewhere, that he has goals that differ from those of the Legion in general?

My problem withthe characterization of Vulpes in many fanworks is that he becomesall-powerful, some  fans going as far asto suggest that he could lead the Legion by manipulating its leaders. And I’mjust saying: no, he cannot, he cannot because he will not do it, and he willnot do it because he is on a leash he doesn’t want to put off.

Now, you couldsay that everyone in the Legion is on a leash – for example, so is Antony. Butthrough your conversations with him, you learn that there is some not-so-deephidden bitterness and sadness lingering in him because of what happened to histribe when the Legion came. That is a man that is not brainwashed completely,he is still remembering something he shouldn’t remember, and thinking somethinghe shouldn’t think. He is on a leash he cannot put off, and he is painfullyaware of that. But Vulpes, it appears to me, is too far gone and does not seeany motivations beyond his loyalty to Caesar.

Vulpes is, forme, a character that exemplifies a situation where natural intelligence meetsmadness and a history of brainwashing. He is intelligent, but he uses it forthe gain of others, and he is brainwashed to obey a faction, but he is enjoyingthe process because he gets to inflict pain and satisfy his own need forviolence, as shown by Nipton. Nipton showed quite well that he was enjoyingthis moment – he put his mind, his creativity and his energy into creating it.He didn’t have to do it. He didn’t have to create a lottery. He could haveraided the city and burned everyone, but instead he came up with this elaborategame that ultimately just satisfied his need for morbid displays and cruelty.He was like a little kid that tortures lost kittens.

However, he doesnot go off to kill and torture anyone he sees, no, as you have mentioned inyour question, he is aware that Nipton deserved it, he hated Nipton with aburning passion. And why? Why Nipton? Because it is Nipton that goes againstevery moral rule the Legion imposes. He hates what the Legion hates, and oh boywill he have fun with those who have gained the Legion’sdisapproval. And he will be smart about it, and creative, and he will beterrifying because of this very reason: because he is a man that cannot beconvinced to stop doing what he does, because he will continue doing it with anappalling kind of cruelty, and because at the same time you will know that heis not just a madman that can be put down – he is way too smart to be just mad. Madmen aren’t automaticallyterrifying. They become terrifying when they have power and a reason to do whatthey do, as well as the wits to carry out what they have planned. And this isVulpes for me.

Now you can startthinking about why he is like that. You will ultimately begin to ask thequestion many people have asked about serial killers. Intelligent, mad peoplethat think that they are doing what they are doing for a reason? Does thatsound familiar? Intelligent, mad people that get away with murder. Can theirbehavior be explained by their past? Their childhood? When did they go mad? Didthey go mad or were they born that way?

What sets Vulpesapart from many other Legionnaires is the way he inflicts pain, and the way heseeks the displays of cruelty. I believe that even fellow Legionnairessometimes feel like his actions are a bit too much – but are too afraid toadmit it because Vulpes doesn’t do anything bad to those who don’t deserve it,according to Legion laws. So isn’t he acting just, whatever he does? And whatdoes the fact that they are uncomfortable about his actions say about them?Aren’t they just as at fault as the victims, then? 

Anyhow, other Legionnaires’cruelty is more functional. They show cruelty because that is the way of theLegion, and people get used to being cruel, and begin to see it as their rightand their obligation. But Vulpes is creativeabout it, his cruelty is more than functional. It is his nature thatcompels him to do the things he does, it is coming right from his cold, coldheart. It’s his wish and his desire, and he is living these moments. Out of all the Legionnaire’s that come tomind, only Joshua Graham and Caesar, as far as I can tell, have shown a similarbehavior. Joshua has struggled with this dark side of him for a long time, andhe is still struggling – never quite managing to suppress his anger. Caesar hasbuilt a whole nation on cruelty, and no man that is not enjoying it would beable to do that. Joshua is a bit different from Caesar and Vulpes because hiscruelty seems to be directly tied to his all-consuming anger, whereas those twoseem to be just enjoying it – Caesar in a more controlled fashionthan Vulpes.

We don’t knowmuch about Vulpes’ biography, other than that he was brought into the Legion asa child. Needless to say, the events that followed the arrival of Legion werebound to leave a mark on his psyche, one that cannot be healed. He survived andwitnessed terrifying brutality, and itshaped him into the man we see today. I think, the Legion is a conduit forVulpes’ personal need for cruelty, but at the same time, the Legion is perhaps whatcreated this need in the first place. I believe, this is what you callidentification with the aggressor in psychoanalysis. It describes aprocess in which an abused individual starts identifying with the aggressor,rejecting their own personality and experiences and eventually moldingthemselves into an aggressor themselves (though not always). There is nodenying the fact that the childhood of the man who we came later to know asVulpes Inculta was terribly traumatic. He likely lost every adult he has everloved, along with most of his friends, he experienced the physical and mentalbrutality of the Legion, and at the same time he had to believe that all ofthat was just and right, and that his pain was invalid and unreasonable. Inessence, his experiences and his view of the world were invalidated, everythinghe knew was right was wrong, and everything wrong that happened was,supposedly, right, truth no longer existed. His world was quite literallyturned upside down. Like many other children that were captured by the Legion,he went though a process where he had to use multiple defense mechanisms to beable to simply survive. And he didsurvive. More than that, he, did better than most of the captives, became aDecanus, and later – a Frumentarius. My guess is that he was able to separatehis feelings from himself so successfully (dissociation) that it allowed himnot only to survive the first few years but also to rise through the ranks, allthe while denying whole chunks of his personality – or what used to be hispersonality. I think he did it so well and for so long, he became a differentperson. This is where identification comes in.

Here is a excerpt from an article onidentification with the aggressor (and you can read more here):

How does identification withthe aggressor work? The child, straining constantly to decipher and to liveinside the experience of the other person, fills the void left by dissociationof her own feelings and perceptions with an evervigilant, overheated intelligence. In this way, she tries toanticipate the dangers that may come from the attacker so she can head themoff. Ferenczi described the instantaneous precocious development of hypersensitivies, superintelligence, evenclairvoyance, whose purpose is to assess the environment and calculate the bestway to survive. Knowing the aggressor “from the inside” in such a closely observedway allows the child to gauge at each moment precisely how to appease, seduce,flatter, placate, or otherwise disarm the aggressor. Without conscious thought,the child suddenly discovers the precocious abilities that are needed for thejob. Identifying with the aggressor alsoinvolves feeling what one is expected to feel, whether this means feeling whatthe aggressor wants his particular victim to feel or feeling what the aggressorhimself feels. The child may even share in the pleasure that the abusergets from hurting the child: Ferenczi (1932) observed that a traumatized childmay “become so sensitive to the emotional impulses of the person it fears thatit feels the passion of the aggressor as its own. Thus, fear … can turn into …adoration”

In his situation, it might have beeneasier to identify with the aggressor than to retain his own personality. Ifhis tribe was gone, his family dead, and the Legion was all he had, surroundinghim from the East, West, South and North, he might have felt like he had noother choice but to accept that the Legion was his new life and new reality. Therewas no escape and no hope for another life. How do you at the same time acceptthis and think that the Legion is bad? It seems downright impossible, especially for a child. So perhaps the only way to survive isto believe that those people that are hanging from the cross are hanging therefor a reason. And you are not hanging there – also for a reason, the reason beingthat you are a loyal Legionnaire and not a filthy profligate.

Dissociating your own feelings andparts of your personality may be not only adaptive but even necessary becausewhen you have an aggressor as violent and dangerous as the Legion, you have toplay a specific role, and you have to playit well. Not only do you have to play your emotions, you have to believe inthem in order to play them more effectively, because anything else might belife threatening. As Frankel from the article cited above has put it, “you feelwhat you must in order to be convincing in the role that will save you”.

This is why I say that I perceive VulpesInculta (talking of dissociation and rejecting parts of yourself – we don’teven know his real name) as a fundamentally brainwashed character. Brainwashednot in the sense that people have been actively putting thoughts in his head tomold him into a good little soldier; I am talking of brainwashing that hashappened naturally and subconsciously, simply because he needed to survive andfound a very effective way to do so.

Identification with the aggressor is avery common thing. An abused child that is kicking the dog is identifying withthe aggressor, a mother that has been abused as a child and is now doing thesame to her child, is identifying with the aggressor, the infamous StockholmSyndrom is also an example of this phenomenon. Whenever an individual is in aposition of powerlessness and helplessness, identification with the aggressormight take place. Now, if this is such a common thing, and most of the childrenthat have been captured by the Legion have used this defense mechanism, why isVulpes so different from everyone else? Why is he so special, compared toeveryone else? Considering how much of his original personality he has lostafter he has been captured and molded into something else, I doubt that we cansay for sure. But as I mentioned earlier, I think he is an example of asituation where natural intelligence and creativity meet madness andbrainwashing. I highly suspect that he is just a very smart man, and once has been avery smart child. Whether he was emotionally vulnerable before the Legion came,and this is why he turned into what he is, or if it is the other way around andhe was thick-skinned and this is why he was able to survive and rise throughthe ranks – I cannot say. I even think that this is a rather philosophical question.