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orshii · 1 month

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Highway to Cloud Nine

🏍️ Pairing: biker! Kim Hongjoong x mechanic! female reader 🏍️ Word count: 12,8 k 🏍️ Warnings: cursing, mentions of alcohol use, smoking, shotgun, cheating (not by Hongjoong), angst, suggestive 🏍️Trope: Brother's best friend

🏍️ Summary: The car service you run with your brother, Jongho, is rather challenging, especially in his absence when you must manage everything on your own. Kim Hongjoong, your brother’s best friend, needs urgent repairs for his bike only complicating everything more for you, however, some tension also arises between the two of you as you notice a shift in your dynamic.

San, who is your ex, only makes everything more complicated when he reappears in your life. You’re faced with two choices now: you navigate your life the way you want it or you let the fear of disappointing your brother consume you.

🏍️ A/N: Hello there! Here I am again because suddenly I became obsessed with biker Hongjoong and I can't get over it. Nice! And I just love the brother's best friend trope. This story popped up in my mind in like 15 minutes and I don't know when I was able to write this much only in two days, lol. So yeah, I hope I managed to convert what I wanted, (sorry Sannie), and I hope you enjoy hehet! (this Hongjoong is so HOT I want to be the MC.) Byee! (divider)

The loud banging on the door coming from the garage under our flat disturbed my evening as I watched a TV show, tired of the day full of chaos. I stood up annoyed, thinking who was coming at this hour when we were closed for the day. I went to the stairs that led down to the car service we ran with my brother Jongho, who was away for a trip with his girlfriend. We named our service, Limitless and it has been almost ten years since we led this business. I grew up with cars and bikes and fell in love with fixing the machines and just admiring some expensive collections that some rich people owned. I already finished college and until I found what I wanted to do for a living, I decided I was going to help my brother out for a while as he was capable of overworking himself. I convinced him to get some rest because he needed a little break from the nonstop work in the garage. Our parents were long gone out of our lives. Our mom died and our dad was nowhere to be seen since then. We remained alone and Jongho took care of me since then. And I couldn't be more grateful for him, so this is why I told him I could manage the garage for a few days and he didn't need to worry about a thing. It was hard managing alone but I needed to do this for my beloved brother because he deserved a break.

I went downstairs as it led to the garage, the familiar smell of oil and steel hit my nose and the banging on the garage door did not stop.

"Coming!" I said annoyed by the loud noise.

I unlocked the door and saw a frustrated Kim Hongjoong standing in front of the garage. His biker helmet in his hands, his dark red hair falling onto his forehead a little wet from sweating, his undercut barely in sight. He was wearing his black leather jacket a white T-shirt under it, his pumped-up chest on the sight, paired with black skinny jeans that were ripped on the knees. As I saw it was him, I rolled my eyes annoyed, because I hated this guy. He was a walking red flag with his red hair that screamed he was a bad guy from far away. He was Jongho's best friend and he was a daily guest in our service. He always annoyed the shit out of me and he seemed he did not like me as much as I didn't like him.

"We are closed Hongjoong, what do you want?" I asked still holding the door, ready to slam it into his face.

"Where is Jongho? He didn't answer my calls." He asked running his fingers through his wet hair.

"He is on a trip with his girlfriend so don't disturb him." I deadpanned as I was ready to slam the door. But Hongjoong's hands prevented it.

"When is he coming back?" He seemed desperate.

"Tomorrow night."

"Fuck!" He shouted out loud stressed as he buried his face into his hands.

I sighed annoyed. I did not start to pity him; I was just curious. "Why?"

"Something happened with my bike and I have an important race tonight. I pushed my bike all the way here because it won't start no matter what I do. But now I'm fucked." His gaze bored into mine as he sighed.

I looked behind him, where his big dark red motorbike was standing waiting for a hand to repair it. "It doesn't get fuel?"

"I don’t know, I'm not a mechanic." He said looking over his shoulders at his beloved bike. "But I really need it for tonight."

I sighed for the thousandth time this evening. "Bring it in. I can fix it." I mumbled annoyed. Yes, I might have pitied Hongjoong, because he seemed so desperate and it seemed it was really important for him. Fixing cars—and bikes apparently—was my job and I just couldn't resist my passion, which helped me through tough times. Fixing cars helped me organize my thoughts and to even not think at all. So, I offered my help.

Hongjoong seemed quite surprised at that as he raised his eyebrows. "Seriously?"

"Come before I change my mind."

Hongjoong did as told and pushed the bike into the garage as I lifted the door up. His bike was a shade of dark red, with some black colors appearing on the sharp features, the lamp on the front was sharp and it looked like sharp eyes, which reminded me of Hongjoong’s eyes. I prepared some tools I needed to fix the bike. As I analyzed it a little and tried to start the engine, I already knew what was the problem and it wasn't that big of a deal. The fuel just couldn't reach the engine, because a part of the engine was slacked and it didn't let the fuel flow into the engine. I felt Hongjoong's gaze on me the whole time as I crouched down next to the bike so I could repair it.

"Can I help you with something?" He asked a little embarrassed as he scratched the back of his nape.

"No, just sit and let me work." I deadpanned as I looked up at him as he was standing next to me.

So, he sat down and silence fell over us. I was curious so I asked. "So, again those illegal races? I thought you stopped."

"I need money." He stated.

"For what?"

"It's none of your business."

I scoffed as I tried to screw a clamp into its place. "Okay, big boy."

"Can you just do your work?" His voice came out frustrated.

I stopped, as I looked at him in disbelief. I couldn't believe this guy. "I'm making a favor for you, so shut the fuck up!" I started to get angry.

He laughed. "Oh sorry, princess for disturbing you." His voice sounded sarcastic and annoyed.

I really tried to stay calm, it was in both of our favor. "Don't call me a princess!"

"Don't be mad, princess." He always did this, to annoy my shit out and today was not the day when I let him do it.

So, I stopped what I did and stood up with a scoff. "You know what? Go fuck yourself and your bike. It's not my business as you told me. The door is that way." I pointed towards the door as I dropped the spanner on the dusty concrete floor and turned away to leave him there. I just lost my patience and was under pressure the whole day, he needed to step over it, because he didn’t care.

Then he grabbed my wrist and whirled me around to look into his eyes. He was hovering over me with a deadly stare, his lips in a thin line, his red hair messy. "No, you fucking get that spanner and fix my bike, because I need it!" His face was close to mine, I felt his heavy breathing on my cheeks.

"Fix it yourself, the tools are there." I pointed at the ground towards his bike.

"Stop this shitty attitude of yours, Y/N! I really need to win this race tonight, please!" He seemed like he was near dropping to his knees and begging for me.

"Oh, you can say such things as well like, please? I'm surprised" I said as I pushed him away from my face, with my hands on his chest. I needed to show him, that he couldn't just control me and to be unrespectable with me. I couldn’t let that, I fixed his beloved bike so he was going to disappear as quickly as I wanted because I did not want to see his face.

And when I finished his bike and started the engine, it lighted up and it was ready to race for whatever reason it needed to. When Hongjoong left he mumbled something that sounded like a thank you and that he was going to arrange the price with Jongho. Like my brother fixed it…

Then I went upstairs, the quiet of our flat reminding me of how tired I was from working all day. So, after a short shower, I collapsed into my bed, trying to compose myself for another tiring day without Jongho as I fell asleep finally, an annoying face with red hair popped up in my dream that turned out to be a nightmare.

It was the middle of the night when I got a call. I groaned in frustration as I hated it when I couldn't get my well-deserved beauty sleep. It was still dark outside as my room was in complete darkness, my phone on the nightstand the only light in it. I reached for my phone; I just couldn't imagine what was so important that couldn't wait until the morning. When I grabbed my phone, it lit my face and I squinted my eyes from the sudden brightness, couldn't even read who was calling me, I just answered.

"Y/N! Thank God you picked up!" Comes a familiar and annoying voice from the phone.

I looked at my phone to check the time and I grew more annoyed when I saw that Hongjoong's name was looking back at me. "Hongjoong, it's 3 in the morning what the hell do you want?"

"I know, I'm sorry. But I think I need a little help." His voice seemed a little sheepish. Like he was embarrassed for calling me—as he should be.

"What the hell happened now?"

"I crashed with my bike…I need help in carrying it away…Please, I swear I'mma pay you back, but the police can't find me, I'mma be in big trouble if they do."

I squeezed the bridge of my nose in frustration as I shot my eyes closed. "Where are you?"

He mumbled something about being next to a factory on the edge of the city and thanked me at least a thousand times. I sat up with a groan, I couldn't believe myself, why couldn't I just say no to him? I was even surprised by myself. Then I sat up in the black Jeep we bought with Jongho together, the trailer hanging from behind as I was on the way to save Hongjoong's ass, the second time in like 10 hours—he was going to pay for this for the rest of his life I'm going to make sure about it.

When I was reaching Hongjoong's location my eyes averted around the surroundings, trying to find him. It seemed it rained a few hours before because the asphalt was wet and slippery. Then suddenly he appeared in front of my car and I almost hit him, I stepped on the brakes quickly and cursed. The sight in front of me was like in the movies. Hongjoong was standing on the road, the car's lights illuminating his face, some shadows lurking on it, making his features sharper, where some blood was flowing down from his temple. His red hair was damp I assumed from the rain, it was sticking to his forehead, some red wet drops flowing down his face that came from the red dye, mixing with his blood. He was wearing blue jeans that were ripped but not intentionally as his knees were bloody as well. On top, he was wearing a colorful shirt unbuttoned and a white T-shirt under it. I saw his bike which was lying on the ground crushed. It was a miracle it didn't catch on fire.

"Shit," I mumbled to myself as I stepped out of my car.

"What the hell happened Joong?" I walked towards him, as his expression told me nothing.

"The road was a little slippery from the rain and the police came after the race ended. I needed to get away from there quickly. And this happened." He pointed at his motorbike which was nothing like a few hours before.

"Oh my God Joong…" I ran my hands through my face frustrated, the sleepiness long gone from my eyes.

"Let's just get this shit away from here." He walked towards his bike in pieces, almost mourning his beloved bike.

Then we somehow managed to lift the bike to the trailer, collecting the broken pieces from the ground, and with that I drove back to our car service with Hongjoong sitting on the passenger seat.

“Did you at least win the race?” I broke the deafening silence in the car as I looked at the road ahead.

“Of course I did.” He leaned back against the headboard and looked out the window looking sad.

When I parked in the garage, it was already 5 in the morning. Hongjoong sighed as we both stepped out of the car and he sat on the old couch that was pushed against the wall, serving perfectly when we needed a little break from work. I closed the garage door and sat next to him, my head on the back of the couch as I closed my eyes with a sigh.

"Don't tell anything to your brother, please." I heard Hongjoong's tired voice from my side. "He is going to fucking kill me."

"I bet," I said with my eyes still closed. Then silence and I opened my eyes to look at Hongjoong whose eyes were already on me. His eyes were sharp and looked at me a little angry.

"Okay, I won't tell him anything." I lifted my hands giving up. "But what about the bike?"

He sighed as he leaned forward supporting his head on his arms. "I have no fucking idea." He buried his face into his hands, he seemed a little panicked. I just looked at his figure that seemed lost and little now, and there it was again. The feeling I hated so much. I just wanted to help him again, and I truly hated this feeling.

"I can't believe myself," I mumbled to myself as I sighed. Hongjoong looked up at me with a confused look. "Jongho is coming back tomorrow night…I guess we can fix that shit until he arrives."

I had never seen Hongjoong this surprised as his eyebrows disappeared from how high they were. "Seriously?"

"Yes, but I'm gonna need your help too."

He set up straight as he turned towards me on the couch. "I'm here, whatever you need, princess." He smirked as he leaned closer to me. I rolled my eyes and stood up waking to a cabinet where we held the first-aid kit.

"But first put yourself together, because you look like shit." I threw the box towards him and he caught it immediately, looking down at it with a frown as he opened it. He looked up at me with child-like eyes. Then I looked at him with my eyebrows furrowed.

"You are seriously like a child," I stated as I sat next to him growing more annoyed as he just didn't know what to do with the thing, I just gave him.

Kim Hongjoong then pouted—I say it again pouted at me—as I grabbed the box from his hands and took the cotton from it with the alcoholic liquid—at least this is going to hurt. His face was full of blood strings that flew from the wound on his temple, his lips were also cut somehow just like his right cheek. I reached the cotton with the liquid towards his temple, where a serious-looking wound was. "Did you drive without your helmet or how did you manage to do this?" He hissed when the cotton touched his temple.

"Nah, the visor of my helmet broke when I crashed and it cut me. I didn't even notice…" He mumbled as he grabbed my wrist, trying to prevent me from touching the cotton to his skin again.

"Stop, it's going to infect you if you won't let me do it," I stated as Hongjoong was looking at my concentrating face from close. Then his lips were the next, the bottom of it cut as the blood was already dry. He parted his thin lips when I traced the cotton slowly on his lips. He hissed at that again but grabbed my waist squeezing it as the liquid stung his lip. I looked up into his eyes and I saw something unusual of Hongjoong. It was something like caring and something I couldn't recognize. I couldn’t read much into it, because he came back to his senses and let my waist as he took the cotton from my hand and started to trace the cotton on his face looking at the little mirror from the box. I was stunned for a moment; I couldn’t process what just happened but I just let it go. It was Kim Hongjoong after all, and he made my next day miserable.

We didn't even sleep as we worked from there, trying to put the puzzles of the motorbike together. It seemed like a mission impossible; the bike was almost a dead duck. But there wasn't something I couldn’t fix, at least if it came to fixing machines. Fixing my problems, however, was beyond my capability. Just as the next problem came in line. We managed to put the pieces of the bike together somehow, working on it without stopping, only when we were too hungry to even lift something. But the engine was completely gone. And it needed a replacement. Was there anywhere you could find a brand-new engine in just a few hours?

Sadly, there was. And it was my ex-boyfriend's workshop, where he sold parts of motorbikes and cars. He was my only way of finding a new engine in a few hours, for this specific motorbike and it sounded like the worst of my nightmares. Asking for a favor from my ex whom I broke up with six months ago was shit. I didn’t want to do it, but it was already midday and Jongho was coming back at night.

My ex-boyfriend was Choi San. We were in a happy relationship, we really did. I thought we were going to be together for good. I already imagined my life with him, marrying him and having kids. I loved him, truly. But six months ago, it turned out he cheated on me. And it hurt. It broke me, I didn't even recognize myself back then. My worst nightmare came to life, which was not knowing San by my side anymore. He was the pillar I needed in my life to keep going. But when that pillar collapses into ashes, what was the reason to keep going with life?

I even considered letting it go and just forgetting about what happened and letting San come back to me because I didn't want him out of my life. But my brother was by my side the whole time and helped me through it, he hit some sanity into me—not literally—and talked me off of going back to him. San was Jongho's best friend. It was difficult for him too, having to choose between us, but he chose me. I knew Jongho was hurt by losing a friend, especially since he had warned me from the start that he didn't want to be forced to pick sides if we ever fought. In the end, he had to, and I felt guilty about it. I never imagined that San and I might break up one day.

He didn't even have a normal explanation. He just said it happened he was drunk and he can't go back in time to undo it. It was so disappointing hearing those words from him and more heartbreaking when I broke up with him but still loved him. It was already six months ago but I couldn't state that I didn't love him anymore. So, this was the reason it was hard for me to call him. But it needed to be done.

"It's Choi San's workshop, what can I do for you?" I heard his voice and I hoped it wouldn't make me feel anything, but it certainly made my heart beat faster. I was leaning against the receptionist's table in the garage, and Hongjoong sitting on the couch as he was smoking a cigarette.

"Hey, San. I'm Y/N. I need a favor from you." I said to the phone without any emotions.

"Oh, Y/N, hi. It's a surprise hearing from you." His voice was low and sweet like the San I knew from the beginning. "How are you?"

"I'm fine, I just need a favor it's important."

"Okay…what can I help you with?"

"I need a Honda CBR engine as soon as possible," I stated.

"How much is as soon as possible?"

"Like…right now?"

"Mhmm…" He hummed at that. "I don't know babe, what are you going to give me in exchange?"

My heart was beating faster as I grew angrier. "Money? What else could I give you San? Please don't make it harder, I just want to do business with you nothing else."

I saw as Hongjoong snapped his head up as he was still smoking his cigarette. I just averted my gaze from him as I rolled my eyes.

"Okay, okay relax babe. I'mma need at least an hour to bring it to you." San said through the phone as I ignored him calling me like that on purpose, I just wanted to get over it as soon as possible but I felt a little scared because of seeing him again after a long time.

"Thank you," I said before ending the call abruptly.

"The new engine is gonna be here in an hour. I think we can fix it until Jongho arrives." I said looking at Hongjoong a little frustrated from the call.

Hongjoong just nodded and he just stubbed out his cigarette in the ashtray, but I saw on his face something was bothering him.

One hour later as promised San came into the garage with the engine on his blue truck. "It's good to see you, Y/N." He welcomed me sweetly as he walked to the rear of the car and opened the door so we could lift the engine off. I hated seeing him but it made my stomach twist without me wanting it. He hadn't really changed since I last saw him, his hair was still black, his muscles were still pumped, and he was wearing a black sleeveless top paired with beige oversized pants and his working black gloves. He was the same yet, everything changed between us.

Hongjoong helped him lift the engine out of the car, and together they carried it into the garage. As they stood next to the bike, Hongjoong and San made small talk about what had happened to it. They knew each other well—we were all part of the same friend group—but San had stopped showing up when we invited him, for obvious reasons. Hongjoong was the only one who still kept in touch with him. Watching them chat, I couldn’t help but think, What the hell? We don’t have time for chit-chat.

"Okay, we don't have time for chatting, thank you San I'm going to send you the money." I stood in front of them folding my arms as they both looked at me surprised, I was there.

"Chill, babe I was just curious about what happened to Hongjoong." San walked closer to me and placed his hands on my waist, leaving a sweet kiss on my cheeks. I hated him so much; I could've punched him in the face. "You look good, Y/N, I hope to see you again." He whispered into my ears as goosebumps ran through my body, but it was because of the disgust I felt towards him. Yet, I couldn't do anything just stand there and let him kiss me and brush my cheeks after. I wanted to throw up. Then for my luck, he disappeared after shaking hands with Hongjoong.

I was just standing there a little stunned. I hated myself for letting him crawl into my head again. I hated him for behaving like nothing bad happened between us. And I hated Hongjoong for witnessing all of that.

"Is he still bothering you?" Hongjoong asked sheepishly as he looked at me.

"It's none of your business, yeah? Let's finish this up, 'cause I'm tired." I started without any emotions. Hongjoong was the last person I wanted to talk to about my feelings towards San. Everyone knew the story of ours, but the details were a mystery for everyone. He had secrets. So, did I.

With that, we worked all day to somehow put that engine in its place, without saying any words to each other, because I just wanted to finish this and be alone a little. I started to feel overwhelmed and the only solution for this was being alone on my own and somehow organizing my thoughts, or letting them drown me. It was whatever.

Then we finally finished and I collapsed on the couch when we heard the bike's engine fire alive. I was kind of proud of myself, I never really fixed motorbikes, my knowledge stopped at cars but I assumed they were similar so I had no problem in doing it.

"Thank you so much Y/N," Hongjoong said as he was sitting on his bike the helmet on already, a few strings of his red hair falling onto his forehead. "I really own you one…or two. I'mma pay you back I promise." He said as he closed the visor on his helmet. I just couldn’t say anything as I just watched him rolling out of the garage, the sound of the bike hearable even when he was long gone. The tiredness hit me at that moment as I was barely capable of going upstairs after closing the garage and collapsed into my soft bed like somebody just knocked me out.

Jongho returned and I was so glad to know him by my side again. Managing Limitless without him was tough but I knew I would do it again if it meant him resting a little. And I thought it was time for a little partying for myself as well after this tiring week. My best friend called me and told me her boyfriend, Seonghwa was holding a party at his house, as the end of summer was near. So, I accepted the invitation gladly because I really needed a break from everything.

I quickly got ready for the party, dressed up in my black leather jacket a white top under it, with a black skirt and black boots, along with some silver accessories and I made a black eyeshadow as makeup. I was quite satisfied with my appearance when I heard a honk coming from my best friend's car, as he said she was going to pick me up so I could drink.

When we arrived at Seonghwa's house, it was already full of people that I knew from college or from Limitless as the majority of the city came to us to repair their machines. It was great for our finances, which we definitely needed. We were heading straight to the drinks as we walked through the people somehow the music throbbing loudly in my heart, almost deafening. The living room was lit with different colors, making the dancing people disappear into the mixture of colors.

After pouring some drinks for ourselves we walked back to the backyard, where our friends were sitting. They were sitting next to a table with only a few seats available. Everyone was there, my brother, and his girlfriend who was sitting next to him leaning on his shoulder. Seonghwa, my best friend's boyfriend as she sat straight into his lap without thinking. And there was Wooyoung, my other best friend who was a goofy person, we always bickered or made fun of the others together. Then there was Mingi and Yunho, the boyfriends as they had been together for almost five years. I always envied their relationship because it was so honest and just looking at them made my heart beat with happiness. They beamed happiness all the time. And there was Hongjoong, wearing his usual biker jacket, his red hair now pulled back a few strings on his forehead only. Our eyes met and I quickly averted my eyes off him as I sat next to Wooyoung hugging him comfortably.

We haven’t met with Hongjoong since I fixed his bike, he just sent me the money for the service and the engine and that was all. I wondered if he told Jongho what happened.

Then lastly San was the only one who was missing from our friend circle and yes it was my fault, I did feel guilty, but it wasn't only my fault. He played a part in it as well, everyone started to hate him after what he did with me. They wanted to apologize to San, and they waited for an apology from him as well, but he simply never showed up when they invited him and slowly, they just let him go.

As the night got deeper and chillier, a lot of drinks came to our table as well, and we just chatted with the others, not bothering to dance inside. The host was with us the whole time as well, not even caring what was happening inside his house. It was a habit of ours as we went to house parties. We just needed a table to sit at and a few drinks and the night was gone with us having fun and bickering around. The alcohol slowly started to get up into my mind and I started to feel a little drunk, but it was a good drunk. I just felt happy being around my friends.

When we got bored of sitting in one place everyone seemed to disappear. The couples needed their own time as well—disgusting—and I found myself on the backyard bench alone as I looked up at the sky, where the moon was shining back at me in its full form in a shade of light blue. It was mesmerizing, I could look up at it for hours as I sipped from my drink occasionally, my legs pulled up to my chest. I didn't even notice how much time passed by as I was wandering around my thoughts when someone sat next to me. I looked to my side when I saw Hongjoong sitting next to me, the last person I was thinking about. Then I just ignored him and sipped from my drink looking up at the sky again. His gaze followed mine.

"The moon looks beautiful tonight." He started looking up at the sky.

"I know," I mumbled a little annoyed.

Then he didn't say anything and just pulled out his cigarette from his pocket and lit one up. He reached the pack towards me offering me one as I shook my head. He just shrugged and pocketed the rest of the cigarettes with the lighter. He leaned back on the bench and sighed as I looked at him, his eyes were closed facing the sky. The moon lit up his features, the shadows lurking on his face, making it look more intimidating, sharper. His eyelashes touched his face, the cigarette between his thin lips as he inhaled it, then exhaled it and it into the chilly air, as it flew up towards the blue moon.

"What are you doing here by yourself?" He broke the silence as he opened his eyes and met mine that were already on him. I quickly narrowed my gaze away from him as I got caught.

I just shrugged. "Drinking, thinking about life."

"What are you drinking?" He asked taking the alcohol from my hands as he sipped from it without my permission. He squinted at the taste of it as I watched him struggle. "Ew, how can you drink this?" He handed back the glass.

"It's like water for me, dude," I said sipping from it again.

I saw as he furrowed his brows. "Dude?" He gasped as he acted surprised his hands on his heart.

"So, we are friends now?" He asked.

"No, dude, we are not."

"What a shame, you have no idea what you're missing out on," he said with a slight giggle. He seemed drunk too.

"Trust me I do know." I looked at him with a knowing smile. "Is your bike working still?" I asked him curious.

"Yes, it's better than before. I won already a few races with it." He said proudly. It was obvious how passionate he was about his bike and racing.

"Why do you race?” I asked suddenly.

"I fell in love with bikes a long time ago, and when I discovered racing, I just couldn’t stop. Also, I need the money too.” He said his gaze on his hands.

"Will you tell me why? Or it’s still not my business?” I looked at him tilting my head.

His gaze remained averted as he said sincerely, “My mom needs it. The company she worked for let her go due to having too many employees. I want to support her until she finds a new job."

"That's really kind of you," I said sincerely. I would never have guessed that he needed the money for such reasons, rather than trouble with the law or something like that.

He just nodded as a comfortable silence fell on us. That I would've never imagined besides Kim Hongjoong.

"Do you want to shotgun?" He broke the silence again as I looked at him frowning. He seemed serious with his unserious question.

"Yeah, why not?" I answered and it surprised the both of us. I was just drunk and I was curious how his lips felt against mine.

Hongjoong chuckled at that, not waiting for agreement as an answer. He studied me thoughtfully, as if unsure whether I was serious. "Are you scared or something?" I teased, raising my eyebrows.

"Not at all." Then I watched as he reached the cigarette between his fingers to his lips that slightly parted and inhaled the toxic smoke deeply, as it went straight into his lungs. Then he quickly leaned forward and cupped one side of my face under my jaw as his lips were almost touching mine. My heart rate was as high as the sky as I looked straight into his eyes when the smoke came out from his lips as he exhaled it straight into my parted mouth, his lips brushing against mine slightly.

At that moment I felt like my heart might just stop. Might just say “Hello I'm moving out because I can't handle this guy.” Something was weird in my chest, something that I couldn't name, couldn't compare. The smoke was long gone as I inhaled it deeply into my lungs as it disappeared there. But Hongjoong did not pull away and neither did I. We were just frozen as we were still looking into each other's eyes like we were locked there into a framed picture. Then Hongjoong's eyes narrowed from my eyes to my still parted lips as I breathed out, a barely visible smoke coming out. I saw in his eyes he was thinking about his next move a lot as he tried to close the distance between our lips and I just couldn't insist. Just until this weird bubble of ours exploded.

"Hongjoong." I heard a familiar voice coming from Hongjoong's side. It was my brother and I just wanted to dig myself deep into the soil. I wanted to be anywhere but there at that moment. Jongho approached us with a smile, his focus solely on Hongjoong. "Oh, you're not alone—sorry for interrupting," he said, lifting his hands in a gesture of apology. But as he took in the scene, he noticed me sitting next to Hongjoong. His expression shifted as he recognized me, his sister who had already played this game with him. I felt ashamed. Embarrassed. Jongho's smile just vanished, like it was never there. "You've got to be kidding me." He scoffed and then turned away from us walking towards the house madly.

"Fuck," I said standing up from the bench, where a frustrated Hongjoong was still sitting like he didn't know what to do.

"Go tell him that there's nothing between us and nothing ever will be," Hongjoong said his voice going quiet at the end. I won't say it didn't hurt. It did, but it was nothing compared to what I felt because of Jongho. Because he was disappointed in me again. My plan was not to make his life harder than it is. But I always failed and failed.

I chased after him, stumbling through a sea of unfamiliar and familiar faces, desperately trying to locate Jongho in the crowd. I felt like I was in a dark and all-the-time-changing maze. Then I went out the front door and I just saw Jongho heading towards his car.

"Jongho!" I screamed his name to stop. He did not stop.

"Jongho, please hear me out! It's not what it looks like!" I shouted after him, my voice breaking slightly.

Then he stopped in his tracks and turned around to face me with a furious expression his brows furrowed. "Don't tell me it's nothing when you just can't do other things than fucking with my best friends. So, when they are going to break your heart, I have to fucking choose between you or them. I'm sick. I'm sick of your games, Y/N.

I thought after San you learned your lesson, but I guess you are just into this shit of getting together with my best friends so in the end they are going to fucking disappear from my life for good after breaking your heart. I had enough of this shit. I won't repeat this scenario again…" Meanwhile, he spoke I was just frozen in place as tears rolled down my cheeks. I wanted to say a lot of things to him, to scream at him, Hongjoong meant nothing to me. But words just couldn't leave my mouth they were stuck in there, almost not letting me breathe.

"There's…there's nothing between Hongjoong and I, Jongho. I swear to God there's nothing." My voice came out weak as I somehow managed to let those words out that hurt like hell but history simply just couldn’t repeat itself.

He just looked at me like he couldn't believe me anymore but seemed like he accepted it for now. "Let's just go home." He sighed as he said.

I just nodded and sat in the back seat of his car as Jongho went back to get his girlfriend as well. The way home was silent as the only noise was the night radio that was playing some romantic melodies and my eyes averted in front where Jongho was holding his girlfriend's hands on the gear stick as they looked at each other sweetly for a moment. A few tears just flew down my cheeks because I thought I was never going to experience love that is not only one-sided. Love that is on the same level as mine. A partner in crime who calms you down in this cruel world. Love, love, love. I couldn't believe in experiencing true love for the rest of my life. I just simply gave up and signed up for the dark side.

Since that night, Jongho's behavior wasn’t the same. He was cold and barely talked to me. I couldn't blame him, because I truly deserved the silent treatment. Hongjoong did the same. He hadn't even come to Limitless since then and pretended like he wasn't about to kiss me that night. It was shit and I just wanted to forget it. Everything was good a few weeks ago. But Hongjoong needed to appear at my door to help him, then I needed to call my ex-boyfriend.

It seemed he took it as a sign that I might let him back. Because he was constantly annoying me, calling me at night drunk and telling me he was still loving me and shit. If he would've said this four months ago, I would've let him come back to me without any thought. But now it was different and I didn't even want to hear from him. Yes, I was scared a few weeks ago when I called him, because I was terrified, I might feel something for him still. I have to admit perhaps a part of me will always love him, it's the curse of a first love. But talking to him and even meeting with him, kind of led me to the conclusion that I was ready to let him go for good. It was for the better.

I was in the garage, sweeping the dusty concrete floor, ready to close Limitless for the night, when I heard a car's engine sound that stopped, then a knock on the garage door. I sighed again as I was the only one home for the night. I opened the door and I saw Choi San standing in the door with a flower bucket in his hands.

"San?" I was so confused, what the hell did he want from me?

"Hey, babe, brought you some flowers." He said casually leaving the flowers in my hands, as he stepped closer to me pecking my cheeks and letting himself inside. I was just too stunned by his actions; I scoffed in disbelief turning towards him where he plopped down on the couch.

"San what are you doing?"

"I came to see you. Is that a problem?" He asked like there wasn't a single problem with it.

"Yes! It is, what the hell are you thinking right now? I called you to do me a favor and now we are back together? Are you delusional?" I asked him getting more and more angry as I threw the flowers from my hands at the floor.

He looked down at the flowers and he seemed hurt at that. He stood up and started to walk slowly towards me. His expression changed entirely; it became serious like no one was allowed to speak to him like that. "I know you still love me, Y/N." His fingertips traced through my cheeks, looking almost psychotically at me.

"No, I don't love you anymore! Just get the fuck out of here I don't want to see you San!" My voice raised as I pointed towards the door putting a little distance between us.

He tilted his head to the side still looking at me. He looked like a tiger that was going to hunt you down in a blink of an eye. He started to step closer to me as I stepped back. We played this game until I was pushed against the wall, his broad figure hovering over me. That was the moment I felt terrified. I was caged in between his arms; I had no way out of there.

"Stop lying to yourself and come back to me, babe." His fingertips were tracing down my neck, then up to my lips, my cheeks, like I was an art in a museum and I was allowed to be touched. My body started to tremble.

"San, please just go away!" I sounded desperate like I would've done anything for him to leave.

"What if I don’t want to, my love?" He smiled at me with an evil smile I just couldn't think anymore.

"Get your hands off her, San!" A familiar voice came from behind San when all I saw was him being dragged away from me, as I finally was able to breathe. I saw Hongjoong's figure as he held San by the collar of his shirt. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" Hongjoong hissed through his teeth.

"It's none of your fucking business, Hongjoong. What? Did you two fuck? Does Jongho know?" San sneered his only intent to provoke. The words struck a nerve in Hongjoong, and before I knew it, he landed a punch squarely on San's face, nearly knocking him to the ground.

"Fuck you, San. You're a fucking nobody. Why can't you just leave Y/N alone? Hasn't she suffered enough because of you?" Hongjoong spat, pointing at me as if I were just an object, devoid of emotions. But his words hit home, and I was taken aback by how much he seemed to understand my feelings.

San just spat blood on the floor as he lurked forward and sent Hongjoong to the floor and he started to punch him. But Hongjoong was quick and prevented San from hitting him more in the face and quickly turned them around, so now Hongjoong was on top, hitting San in the face with his full power. "You fucking bastard, Jongho trusted you but you betrayed him. What is wrong with you? I don't recognize you anymore." Hongjoong mumbled in between hitting San, then he just held down San's arms strongly and looked down at him with a furious expression. Then San taking advantage of this, tried to hit Hongjoong again, but he dodged quickly.

"You guys left me alone, I knew I wasn't welcomed there, so I didn't go." San gritted through his bloody teeth as he dodged one of Hongjoong's hits.

I knew the fight wasn't just about me. They were friends as well, but San became so arrogant everyone started to leave him.

Along the way, everything happened so quickly I couldn't react in time. When I realized what was happening, I went next to them and yelled as much as I could. "Stop fighting for fuck's sake!" I pleaded. "Please, Hongjoong…" My voice became softer as I placed a hand on his shoulder. His fist hung in the air, but he froze, glancing up at me. The skin around his left eye was already reddening, a cut had opened on his right brow, and blood began to trickle down, matching the wound on his lower lip. I just couldn’t look at San's face because I knew he was covered in blood just like Hongjoong's fist that was full of San's blood.

Hongjoong stood up and lifted San. "Get the fuck out of here and I don't want to hear from you again!" Hongjoong stated to his once best friend as San just left without any words, but I saw in his face a burning desire for revenge in his eyes. And I knew it wasn't the last time we saw him.

"Are you okay?" Hongjoong then suddenly cupped my face, his sweet scent embracing me. My body was still shaking, I just couldn't believe that was the man I loved so deeply. San showed a new side of him and I just couldn't recognize him anymore.

I breathed out slowly as I closed my eyes for a second, taking in the warmth of Hongjoong's hands. "Yeah…" I whispered as I held his hands to push him away. I walked to the closet again, like we were at the beginning, and took the first aid kit. Hongjoong was just looking at me the whole time and when I signaled him to sit down on the couch, he obeyed without a word. He leaned down on the way to take his black cap from the ground that he lost between fighting with San, he wore the cap backward, pushing his red hair back from his forehead. He was wearing a black and white T-shirt with grey sweatpants and white sneakers. He sat down and I followed him as I opened the box. History repeats itself.

We were quiet the whole time as I traced the cotton with the liquid on his eyebrows as he just stared into my eyes the whole time not even hissing from the pain. Then I went down to his thin rosy lips the blood already dried.

"You always take such good care of me..." Hongjoong whispered, his gaze locked on mine, his red hair damp and clinging to his forehead.

"Because you need to be taken care of. You're like a child," I teased, a small smile forming on my lips as he pouted slightly in response.

Then I looked down at his hands and lifted it between us as I traced the cotton on his bloody knuckles as well. The air between us was thick and the tension was growing higher and higher.

Hongjoong looked down at our hands and without any thought he took the cotton from my hands, putting it down, then his hands traveled to my waist and lifted me to straddle his lap. My body felt hot and as I looked into his eyes, I felt woozy like I was drunk suddenly. I couldn't think clearly, my hands were on his shoulders and the eye contact was so deep I found myself in Hongjoong's mind and him in mine. Then I bit my lips because I felt so nervous I felt like it was the first time someone ever touched me. His eyes averted to my lips then his hands on my waist that pulled me closer to him left burning flames behind, making my body catch on fire from the sudden desire I felt. Then he leaned his forehead against mine as we both breathed heavily. Both our desires were blocked by an important reason. We both closed our eyes taking the other's presence in.

"We can't do this Joong," I whispered as my lips almost brushed his.

"I know," His lips were even closer as he almost whispered it into my mouth.

We breathed heavily against each other's lips, our chests moving in synchrony, our eyes taking in the other as we both saw the burning desire in each other's eyes. I fought so hard against this feeling, and so did Hongjoong. But…

"Fuck it!" He said as his lips crashed against mine suddenly and the air from my lungs was suddenly knocked out as I started to move my lips against his. It was rushed, harsh, teeth and tongue tangling with each other, as his hands traveled down my thighs, tracing them slowly as they went back to my ass, as he pushed me closer to himself.

My breath caught in my throat as he groaned, sinking his teeth into my already bruised lips from the rough kisses. My sanity just left my body and I gave in to the desire I felt towards him. But then…something hit me in the gut a feeling that was called guilt. And I pushed Hongjoong away my hands on his chest.

"Let's stop, please. I can't do this." Suddenly my eyes watered from the emotions that were bombarding my already breaking walls. I knew I wanted him, but I just couldn’t. The thought of seeing the disappointment in Jongho's eyes again held me back.

"Y/N…" He whispered as he leaned his head against mine.

"No, Hongjoong. I don't want to run through the same road once again…" I said as I stood up from his lap, it felt like I left a part of me with him.

He stood up too and took my hands into his. "I want you, Y/N. You have no idea how much..." His voice seemed desperate and honest.

"You were the one who told me to tell Jongho that there's nothing between us and never will be," I said, pulling my hands away from his. "And you were right—there is nothing, and there never will be. We both knew it; we just didn’t want to admit it."

"Jongho would understand it." Hongjoong seemed hopeful, but I long lost my hope along the way.

"No, he wouldn't. He is just afraid he might lose another friend because of me. And he is right. It might be that just desire speaks from you…" I looked down at my hands, not daring to look into his sharp eyes that changed all of a sudden.

"How the hell do you know what I feel when I didn't even have the chance to tell you?" Hongjoong stepped closer to me and lifted my head holding my chin. "Look at me and tell me you don't feel anything towards me and I'm walking out of that door." He stated as my eyes locked with his. I wanted to cry so bad, he couldn't say that, he couldn't just tell me to choose between him and my brother. I just looked at him as my eyes watered.

"Or do you still love that fucker who hurt you?" His expression turned furious as his fingers around my chin tightened.

I simply couldn't say anything, I tried, I tried to say anything, to say no I hated San with my whole heart, and yes, I felt something whenever I looked at him. I felt my stomach twist and like my heart wanted to stop all the time. But I just couldn't say anything, I went silent as he read my eyes that probably didn't say the things that I wanted to tell him, because he scoffed, his eyes dark with fury as he looked into mine one last time. "You're a fucking coward." Then, he turned and slammed the door shut.

Those words pierced right into my heart, reopening the cracks that had just begun to heal. My heart shattered again into pieces of hopelessness because he was right. I was a coward.

I felt like I was a robot that was programmed to do some things. My feelings were long gone and I wasn't myself these past days. Jongho was still kind of ignoring me, we were working together but the communication was shallow between us. Hongjoong was in the garage a lot recently. It turned out he was working in the garage, helping for Jongho, so I didn't have to help that much. It seemed like they both wanted to close me out and it hurt. So much I couldn't even think. Hongjoong didn't even look at me whenever I was in the garage like I didn't even exist. So, I just let it go, I figured they didn't need me in their life as their friendship was so much more important than me. I accepted it, I let them be and I started to deal with my own problems. For example, studying. My dream was always to be a doctor after my mother died from a cruel disease. But as our father left us, Limitless was left for us to handle. So, I left my dreams behind and started to work in the garage. Working on cars is a lot like being a doctor. As a car mechanic, I diagnose and fix problems with vehicles, much like a doctor diagnosing and treating diseases. It's about diagnosing the issue, repairing the damage, and putting everything back together.

I started to go to a class that trained nurses. I had to start somewhere and I liked it. Jongho didn't even know about it. I started to question his behavior. We didn't even speak with Hongjoong yet he still closed me out like I wasn't even his beloved sister.

Weeks later I had enough of Jongho ignoring me so I had to speak with him. I went downstairs on a Friday night when I saw Jongho and Hongjoong fixing a black Maserati, that was lifted to the air.

I approached them. "Jongho, can we talk?" He looked surprised by the voice coming from behind. He was wearing a blue overall, his chubby cheeks a little smashed with oil. Then I narrowed my eyes at Hongjoong who was wearing the same blue overall with a black T-shirt, his face full of black patches, the usual black cap on his head turned backward.

"Yeah, give me five minutes." His hands were behind the car's tire as he was searching for something behind.

I just nodded and sat on the couch to wait for him. I just wanted to tell him that to stop this childish behavior because I won't steal his best friend, and it was supposed to be clear for now.

As I was sitting on the couch lost in my thoughts, I felt as if someone had come into the garage. I lifted my head and it was San. My heart started to beat fast as my body shivered remembering the last time I saw San. His face seemed normal; it didn't seem like he came to get some revenge because of what happened. His face screamed that he felt guilty about it.

"Y/N, can we talk?" He asked as he didn't even dare to come close to me.

Two heads peeped out under the car hearing the voice of someone. When Hongjoong saw who was it, he quickly swooped forward and pushed San against the wall grabbing the collar of his shirt. "How the fuck do you dare to come back here?" He hissed through his teeth his face close to San's.

"Fuck off you dog!" San pushed him away by the chest. Then I quickly slipped between them facing San.

"What do you want San?" My voice came out straightforward not even trembling for a second.

"I want to talk to you and apologize, please Y/N." His eyes were soft and he seemed desperate.

"What the hell is happening here?" Jongho's voice came from behind as he wiped his hands with a used cloth.

San's gaze locked with Jongho's. The once best friends were now at the same place and I felt like I shouldn't be there. "I just want to talk with Y/N, that's all," San said his voice low and determined as his gaze never left Jongho's.

"She’s not going with you!" Jongho stated firmly.

"That’s not up to you," San retorted flatly.

"She won’t go with you," Hongjoong’s voice cut in sharply.

"Stop talking like I'm not fucking here," I snapped, glaring at the three of them. "You all need to sort this out because you're acting like children. It's pathetic." I pointed at them, my frustration growing. "Let’s go, San!" I grabbed his hands and tugged him away.

"Y/N! Don't you fucking dare to go with him!" To my surprise, it was Hongjoong's voice. I stopped in my tracks at that.

"Or what? What are you going to do?" I looked at him questioningly. "Are you going to beat him again?" Jongho's brows furrowed at that.

Hongjoong looked speechless. "That is what I thought," Then I turned to leave him there with Jongho so he could explain what he did.

I sat in San's car and told him to take me away from there. I was just so mad at my brother, at Hongjoong, I couldn't even look at their faces anymore.

San took me to a random park, we didn't even have any connection with the place. He could've taken me to the place that was our favorite to go together, but he didn't. The reason was because we both sought closure and it needed a new place. So, we sat down on a bench and we talked about how we felt. He asked for an apology from me and I accepted it because there was no point in tiring the other out. We both needed to move on and this talk helped us go through it. It wasn't good when we broke up and it affected our friends too. I wanted San back in our friend group because he deserved to be there. And I knew the others wanted him to come back as well. Lastly, I hugged San and we both agreed on a distanced friendship. As I prepared to step out of his car, parked in front of Limitless, I noted that it was already late into the night. I suggested to San to talk with Jongho and even Hongjoong because their friendship needed fixing—these guys could fix any cars and bikes but they couldn't fix their friendship…

After talking with San, I headed upstairs, passing by a concerned Hongjoong who scanned me with his eyes, checking for any signs of injury. Then I encountered a furious Jongho, who I assumed was aware of the confrontation between San and Hongjoong. I chose to ignore both of them, closing the door behind me with a weary sigh.

After speaking with San my head was a little clearer as I finally felt like I could think clearly and analyze the emotions I felt. My feelings towards San were deep but I could find the bottom of it, it was clear to me now that it had an ending. We just weren't meant to be and it had to happen like this. We can learn even from the heartbreaks; it makes us stronger and more experienced if we get into a new relationship.

Then Hongjoong came into my mind and I wanted to face the fact I did feel something for him, I couldn't deny that. It's hard to say but these emotions towards Hongjoong were deeper than what I felt for San, it almost felt endless, like it had no bottom. And I would've never imagined one day I'm going to say something like this.

But I might have fallen for Kim Hongjoong.

After what felt like an eternity, being drowned in my thoughts, I heard a low knock on my door as I was sitting in my bed and Jongho's head peeped into my room.

"Hey," I said.

"Hey," He sat down on my bed and started to adjust the sheets carefully avoiding my eyes.

"Hongjoong told me some things…" He started. "Why didn't you tell me about San?" His brown eyes met mine.

"There was no point, Hongjoong was there at the right time, it happened and that's all. You ignored me anyway so…" I shrugged.

"I'm sorry, Y/N. I was just so frustrated at the thought we have to go through the same road as half a month ago." His eyes were sincere and emotional.

"I get it, seriously. But after you saw we didn't even talk with Hongjoong you still ignored me. Why?"

He just shrugged. "I still thought something was happening behind my back…even though you didn't show it in front of me, I just felt it."

Guilt crept up my body. "Actually—" I wanted to tell him. No more secrets.

"I know. Hongjoong told me everything." He didn’t let me say anything.

My heart started to race I analyzed his face, searching for some signs of anger. But there was none. "Aren't you like…mad?"

He sighed as he ran his fingers through his brown hair. "No, I—Look I'm not mad, Y/N, I never was. I just wanted to protect you from another heartbreak. I just wanted to act like your big brother who protects you from anything…" He looked down at his hands, he looked so small like this.

"Jongho…" I reached for his hands and took it into mine. "I know you want to protect me; you really did our whole life and I am so grateful for that. But…you can't save me from the feelings I feel and the heartbreaks that are written for me. And I know that your friends are in this story and that is also a sensitive topic. But I didn't mean to fall in love with both of your best friends." Tears welled up in my eyes as this sentence sounded too deep and fragile. "I—I never said you had to choose between me and your friends and I would never ask you that. I would be glad if San would come back to our friend group like in the old days. It would be weird but it's not like I can't be in the same place with him.

"Okay, not anymore…but we talked and we are fine now. At least we can tolerate each other."

Jongho seemed like he was proud of me for being so collected.

"I'm going to talk with San, I promise," he said earnestly. "And about Hongjoong… I won’t get in your way. If you two have feelings for each other, then I shouldn’t stop you just because I’m afraid of losing you and my friends." Jongho spoke with a vulnerability that made his eyes well up, revealing his emotional struggle.

"You won't lose us. We are always going to be by your side, this way or another but you can't get rid of us." I pulled him closer as I hugged him strongly.

"I would never want to. I love you!" Jongho whispered as the room slowly embraced in darkness.

"I love you too, and thank you!"

"You should talk to him."

"Where is he?" I asked.

"He has an important race and he was so stressed when he left. I didn't want to admit it but I think he needs you." Jongho said as his lips curved up a little as I stood up. I quickly walked towards my closet to get my black leather jacket as I was wearing black ripped jeans with a black top.

I hugged Jongho one last time before I stepped out of my room to run to my car and get to Hongjoong before he started the race.

When I arrived at the location Jongho told me the race was going to be held, it was full of people. It was at the top of a huge parking lot in the heart of the city, where they could easily run speeding races. I was amused by how they held something illegal in this part of the city. We were late into the night already as the city lights were shining from up above. Colorful and upgraded cars were parked, and people looking at them like they were a work of art as I passed by them. Then there was a part where only motorbikes were and after parking my car, I walked towards it as I took my surroundings in. The music was beating through my heart as I walked past a car that had installed subwoofers. Everything was strange for me but I always wanted to come to races like these, it had a quite good atmosphere, and everyone seemed excited for the upcoming race.

I reached the motorbikes, there were a few types of bikes standing. They were so beautifully shaped and the colors highlighted its sharp features. I was searching for Hongjoong's red Honda in the eternity of bikes. I looked around, my eyes narrowing through the people who passed by me when someone grabbed my hand and pulled me along. I saw Hongjoong in front of me as he led us to a quieter place, which was the end of the parking lot.

He stopped and turned to face me. "What are you doing here?" He looked stressed like he didn't know where his head was. "You have to get away from here, it's dangerous here Y/N!" He snapped his head from the crowd back to me, looking like a maniac with his wide pupils and eyes nearly completely black. He wore ripped blue jeans and a leather jacket, his red hair disheveled from frequent, stressed attempts to comb it through.

"I came to watch you race and I wanted to talk to you." I stepped closer to him. I needed to calm him down.

He froze at that. "About what?"

"About us."

The crowd was cheering loudly when he said. "I have to go." He looked behind me at the crowd and then back at me like he didn't know what to do.

"Then go!" I nudged him.

He still wasn't himself as he just nodded his lips in a thin line. I stepped closer to him and looked up at him my eyes beaming sincerity. I brushed a red hair string away from his forehead as I whispered close to his lips. "Win this for me." Then I leaned closer to his face and left a sealing kiss on his parted lips. This seemed to bring back Hongjoong to the real world because his eyes were now full of sincere emotions and the burning desire that almost lit his eyes up.

"I will." Then he grabbed me by my waist and pulled me close to his body, his other hand cupping one side of my face as he crushed our lips into a quick chaste kiss, as he kissed me passionately telling me everything, he couldn't with it. Then he slightly pulled away leaving one little peck on my lips as he leaned his forehead against mine.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N…the things I said…" He whispered against my lips.

"Go, Hongjoong!" I chuckled and pushed him by his chest as he didn't want to release me.

"Okay," He left one last kiss on my mouth. "Wait for me, I have a race to win for my princess." He smiled at me, and there was the Hongjoong that finally didn't seem lost. He was full of life and that made my heart full with fuel that is never going to run out.

I stood beside the starting line, watching as Hongjoong pulled up on his dark red bike. His black helmet was on, but I could still feel his intense gaze piercing through it as he twisted the throttle, preparing to race against the competitor beside him. Then the guy in the middle counted back and all I saw was smoke that came from their tires. Whoever was faster won. It seemed like the guy was faster than Hongjoong at first and my heart was racing along with Hongjoong as I prayed for him to win this. Then it seemed this was all the guy could pull out from his bike because Hongjoong flew through the finish line in a blink of an eye.

I saw as he stopped and bumped his fist into the air. I smiled he looked so cool from far away. As Hongjoong turned to come back to me on his bike, red and blue lights started to blind the people who were standing on the roof of a parking lot. The police were here.

I started to look around because I lost Hongjoong as the crowd started to run haphazardly panicking not to be caught by the police. Then a familiar bike pulled next to me and I felt relieved as Hongjoong offered his hand with a helmet. I saw his sharp eyes as he lifted the visor of his helmet, the red and blue lights dancing on his face.

"Come on, princess," He mumbled through his helmet. I accepted his inviting hand and took the helmet as I settled behind him on the bike. Hongjoong took my hand and pulled me close to his back as I wrapped my arms around his waist and leaned my head on his shoulder. I smiled even though we probably needed to get away from there as soon as we could. But it was an adventure just as everything with Hongjoong. I knew if he was there with me, life just couldn't be boring.

Hongjoong rolled through the people carefully and when we managed to get out of the parking lot where I saw the police caught a few people, we finally speeded through the highway. The city lights faded into one thin line as we passed by the big buildings. I never felt this free, I suddenly understood why was Hongjoong so passionate about biking. It gave you the free will, the power to just disappear between the city lights. As we speeded through the highway, I raised one of my hands into the chilly air and chuckled. I just felt so happy the world just stopped for a moment and it was just only us; Hongjoong, the bike, and me. I looked up at the sky, where one side of it was black as the night and the other side was a shade of orange as the sun just started to rise. It was so beautiful.

When Hongjoong stopped at a parking lot as we passed some mountains and drove through some windings the view was more beautiful. Mesmerizing if I may say so. It's hard to describe something like this. We were in the middle of a mountain and at the edge of it all I could see were clouds. The city was covered in white clouds, the sky still painted bright yellow and orange, with a little hint of red that reminded me of Hongjoong's hair. It was like we were three meters above the sky.

We were still sitting on Hongjoong's bike both of us were just mesmerized by the view, only bothered to take off the helmet as we switched places and Hongjoong hugged me from behind, his head on top of mine as I leaned against his chest, his legs were balancing the both of us on the bike. We were sitting there in a comfortable silence as we took in the view in from of us, melting into each other’s presence. Hongjoong nudged me to get off the bike, helping me dismount before stepping off himself. He took my hands in his, lifting them to his mouth to place a gentle kiss on my knuckles.

"Forgive me for being an asshole. I just—after our kiss…but to be honest way before that…I just couldn't get you out of my mind." He stated sincerely as his eyes sparkled with hope. "When I saw, what San was doing to you, I could have killed him right there. But even after everything, you still went with him yesterday. I'm not going to pretend it didn’t hurt, but I guess I deserved it..." He looked down at our hands, gently tracing my knuckles with his fingers.

"I needed closure, Joong. I couldn’t move on until everything with San was cleared up. That’s why I needed to talk with him. It’s done now." Hongjoong lifted his head, a sense of relief evident on his face. "And about Jongho…"

"I talked with him, I told everything to him, about the fight with San, about our kiss afterward, that I have feelings for you, I told everything and he understood it." He seemed desperate, afraid of me stepping back again because of my brother.

"I talked with him too. He told me to go to your race because you needed me." I smiled sheepishly looking at our hands. Suddenly I felt as my cheeks started to blush.

"He was right. My mind was a mess. I wasn’t sure if I could win this." He admitted.

"Did you like it?" He asked with a beaming smile, his perfect-white teeth showing.

"Very much," I said feeling excited as I smiled. "But it was better riding with you through the city."

"Yeah?" He stepped closer to me as he hovered over me, his hands on my waist as he turned me to lean against his bike that was standing still. "Do you want to repeat it?" He asked as he leaned down his lips brushing slightly against mine.

"Definitely," I started looking up at him with sparkling eyes.

"Anything for my princess." His lips curled up as I rolled my eyes at the nickname, but I didn't have the time to complain as his lips were on mine in no time. It felt so good and so right. The passion I felt towards Hongjoong was beyond the universe. His lips moved against mine as I wrapped my hands around his neck, my fingers traveling up on his nape into his red strings as I brushed my fingers through it. He deepened the kiss by cupping one side of my face into his hand and lifting my head so he had better access. Sudden fireworks erupted in my chest, the burning desire igniting and exploding within my heart. Then his hands traveled down to my thighs as he traced his hands through them, then to the back of my thighs as he slowly lifted me to his bike so I was at the same height level as him. I wrapped my legs around his torso as his lips still moved against mine. I couldn't breathe anymore but I just couldn't stop because it was addicting kissing him, I felt like I never wanted to stop because if I did, I might disappear. It didn't feel real. He groaned lowly when his tongue got free access into my mouth, discovering every inch of my mouth. His hands were on my waist holding me still, afraid of falling off his bike. When he finally pulled away, after what felt like an eternity but still wasn’t long enough, he rested his forehead against mine and whispered.

"Let me take care of you now. Let me give you what you deserve."

(Ateez masterlist)

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bvidzsoo · 20 days

Text

Color of love

The third star of Cosmically divine...

☆ Author: bvidzsoo

☆ Pairing: Kim Hongjoong x female reader

☆ Warning: smut, breeding kink (?), possessiveness, mentions of abuse and enslaving, violence

☆ Word count: 12.3k

☆ Rating: nsfw, mature

☆ Genre: Greek mythology, Hongjoong is Hermes and MC is Iris, fated to be together au

☆ Summary: If there was a God everyone feared, perhaps it was Zeus. After the continuous abuse he's put you through, you never thought you'd get to live your eternal life peacefully. That is, until the messenger God shows up and whisks you away before Zeus can see and stop him.

☆ A/N: Helloo, my lovelies!! ^^ I am back and all fresh to continue my Greek series, memory refreshed of the places that our story takes place at. All villages mentioned in this part are very real places and I decided to use them, since I now know Greek people also read this series, I hope I have done justice with the descriptions and please forgive me if I messed up anything, but I did take some creative liberty (mythology included!) Surprisingly, I don't have much to yap about right now, except that while writing this I derailed a bit from the initial plot I had constructed lmao but it's actually good because it tied everything nicely together. The taglist is still open, so lmk if you want to be added to it. I appreciate all your feedback, so let me know what you thought of Hongjoong's part! ^^ Enjoy, and here's a glossary before you start reading:

★ This is inspired by Greek mythology, but I took creative liberty and adapted it to my likes, so keep that in mind while reading, thank you! ★ Hermes is considered the herald of the gods, but is also a messenger God ★ Iris is the the personification of the rainbow and messenger of the gods, a servant to the Olympians and especially Queen Hera ★ talaria are winged sandals ★ petasos is a wide-brimmed hat with a conical crown worn in ancient Greece ★ Zeus is the god of the sky and is considered the ruler, protector, and father of all gods and humans ★ Hera is the goddess of marriage, family, childbirth, and women, known as the queen of the gods ★ Aphrodite is the Goddess of love, beauty, desire, and all aspects of sexuality ★ Dryad is a tree nymph ★ Hades is the God of the underworld ★ Selene is the is the goddess and personification of the Moon ★ Helios is the god representing the sun ★ Isis is the goddess of healing and magic ★ Underworld is a distinct realm where an individual goes after death ★ Cerberus often referred to as the hound of Hades, is a multi-headed dog that guards the gates of the Underworld ★ Ano Skotina, Palaioi Poroi, Palaios Panteleimonas are villages in the Olympic Riviera and are situated on the mountain side ★ Dion is a village and municipal unit in the municipality of Dion-Olympos in the Pieria regional unit, Greece; it's known for its sanctuary of Zeus and its ancient city (definitely give it a visit if you're in the area!) ocean divider; greek divider

☆ Taglist: @patchofblue @sthwaaberry @constipatedcorgi @holytidalwavechees3cake @cheolliehugs

@slowitdownmakeitb0uncy @hoeforsungie @skittyneos @mingheol @sebastianswhore13

@astral-trashcan

༄ ҉ Series m.list ༄ ҉ 　★ previous star ★

Alongside the mountain range of Olympus lays more than one beautiful settlement, some so breathtakingly magnificent that one would dare say the Gods themselves have crafted them. It goes without saying that it wasn’t them, but perhaps the humans that have constructed such roads and buildings were momentarily blessed by Hephaestus to wield their instruments the same way he wields his, with the same precision and perfection, building a haven for those who sought a refuge and a place to which they belonged. The lush green mountain range held more than one hidden village from the prying eyes of those wandering through the forest or the inhabitants of the bustling town of Dion, and these small settlements also offered refuge to those who desperately needed one. Right underneath the noses of the Olympian Gods, blessed but also scrutinized and often forgotten about, nobody would’ve thought to look for the two that held so much power in their pale hands, their bodies frail-looking but everlasting. The earthlings of Ano Skotina were unassuming and comprehensive of the two strangers who ran down the cobblestone-covered paths with baited breaths and soaked to the bone by the heavy rain, yet despite the oddness of their appearance and mumbled speeches, the villagers offered the two wandering souls fresh meal, a warm bath, and a house that they could call theirs. It almost felt like a distant memory now, something that happened centuries ago when, in fact, it was merely a few years back, when Zeus’ rage was still fresh and unforgiving as it mercilessly outlashed the mortals that worshipped him so much.

With the disappearance of Iris from Olympus, the Gods felt restless and uncertain, however, no matter how much Zeus scattered them out to search for his beloved seer, no God or Goddess has ever found her. But she was right under their noses, albeit tucked away in a safe place and surrounded by mortals who loved her and worshipped her unknowingly of her real self and status. The tall pinecone trees mixed with those specific to the climate had turned a sharper and more brilliant green compared to their colour before the two strangers decided to settle down in the quiet village, and after every rain, there was a rainbow. The children of the village would giggle and squeal whenever it appeared in the blue sky as they tried to chase its end, leaving a bright smile on my face as I tinkered around my humble abode, waiting for my lover to return.

The villagers of Ano Skotina were pleasant people, and once they warmed up to the newcomers, they included them in every tradition they had, often showering them with goods they didn’t need anymore. Despite looking as human as possible, there was something unearthly about the two newcomers, their auras bright and light, demanding a certain devotion that many in Olympus lacked. It had been hard at first to get used to the kindness and good deeds that seemingly followed every person here, but at last, I learned and realized that not everyone wished ill on their peer, nor did they expect anything in return if they did something for you.

At first, I had felt ungrateful towards their kindness as I found myself unknowing of the customs of the earthlings. Despite being a messenger, I never quite learned their ways and patterns. But they were understanding and chalked it up to me being peculiar, special, and a little different from them and never made me feel excluded when something was new and I didn’t understand the process of it. Hermes was doing better by my side, he accommodated faster, but that was to be expected. He’s been amongst mortals for longer than me, disguising himself as one as it came as second nature to him. Despite the range of our powers, neither Hermes nor I were blessed with the feat of turning ourselves completely human, and thus, I couldn’t help but blame it on a natural wonder and a blessing made by a Goddess when I was just a child that my hair changed its colour every season. During the colder days, it would turn into an ashen brown, slowly turning into a warm caramel colour as the sun returned. When it got so warm that not even the shade of the tall trees could shelter me from the sizzling sunrays, my hair turned a reddish hue, until it faded into a light brown when the leaves started falling once again. The mortals never said anything, never accused me of anything, but it was easy to tell that they knew something was amiss, that it had to do something with the divine. Perhaps that also prompted them to be kinder and gentler towards me, oftentimes noticeable just how squeamish I was around everyone besides my saviour. His name, the one that the mortals so feverishly worshipped, was Hermes, but the one they unassumingly called out as if he were a friend to them was Hongjoong. I, myself, found the later version of his name more comforting, friendlier, and for once not a reminder of everything I had to endure in Olympus at the hands of Zeus.

The night had been serene when we blew out the last candle and made our way to our shared bed, the covers cold until our ghastly bodies warmed them up, hushed whispers and giggles leaving our reddish lips until we became enraptured by the night and the dreams it brought upon once our minds and souls calmed and admitted defeat to the simple feat of exhaustion. Wrapped in the arms of my lover nothing and nobody could hurt me, I knew I was safe and far away from the very God that called himself our father and protector. But there were nights when my dreams were clouded with visions, making my sleep restless and terrifying. Some visions that came to me would be bright and of great news, and some would be foreboding and dark, petrifying.

At first, when the bright moonlight coming through the opened curtains slowly faded into permeating darkness, I thought it must have been the rainclouds covering the beautiful celestial, but with the appearance of the gut-twisting feeling low in my stomach, I knew something was amiss. The house was eerily quiet and I was alone, no longer in the safe and strong arms of my lover. My feet were cold as I carefully left the confines of my bedroom, the floorboards wet and slippery in an uncharacteristic way. Perhaps Hongjoong had visited Poseidon and brought the seawater inside our house, perhaps the rain was so harsh it settled and flooded our house. But the absence of the pitter-patter of the rain against the roof of the cottage was enough to confirm that it wasn’t raining, and with the talaria not in its place, I also knew Hongjoong wasn’t home.

The quiet hiss behind me and the fear spreading through my body warned me that this wasn’t my reality, that I had been sucked into a vision while unconscious. Most of my visions happened when I was asleep, when my mind was at rest and open to receiving whatever the Cosmos wanted to alert me of, but if the situation was dire, I could force myself into a state of consciousness too to see such visions. Rarely, but it’s been happening more often since I have descended into the human realm, I would get snippets of the future if I touched certain objects or even mortals, visions that usually bore good news. And so, without my consciousness stirring me awake to interrupt the vision, I turned to face the hissing animal behind me. A long and dark green snake was slowly slithering towards me, menacing as it opened its mouth and showed its poisonous fangs. A snake couldn’t kill me, I was immortal after all, but it certainly could harm this human body I was forced to inhibit in this realm.

But the ground shook and the sky cleared once again, the scenery different to where my unconscious body lay peacefully in the arms of my lover. The pinecone trees twisted and turned around me, caging me in as the snake came menacingly close, and I raised my head to look at the moon but it was absent. I was deep in the forest, I could hear the hushed whispers of the Dryads, the concern and fear in their voices. The snake rose off the ground and gave one last hiss before it lunged towards me, my legs apparently frozen in place as I couldn’t jump away or even run off. But before it could sink its teeth into my pale and frail skin, an eagle’s scream was loud and warning as it suddenly gripped the snake in its sharp claws and yanked it away from my body, taking it far away as it flew off into the permeating darkness. The Dryads haven’t stopped whispering, and while their mutters remained intangible, they became louder and more urgent. My legs stopped feeling like lead and I took a tentative step in the direction I hoped the cobble path was and would lead me back to the village, but a shadow darker than darkness itself seeped between the trees as if it was mist, encompassing the forest.

There was a scream in the distance and sudden terror gripped at my throat, my body locking up as I stared into the silver orbs that now seemed to be blocking my every-way, watching me almost tauntingly. I couldn’t breathe as my lungs seized, and I clawed at my throat, but the pressure only worsened, my body shaking from fear and the lack of oxygen. My vision became hazy as creepy laughter echoed around me, a terrifyingly familiar voice, a voice that I loathed with my whole being. I was succumbing to the greater force the more seconds ticked by, but before my eyes could roll to the back of my mind and allow my body to crumble to the cold floor of the forest, a face so clear it managed to make me gasp appeared in front of my face.

The man’s face was simply gorgeous, tanned from the sun and defined at the jaw with a nose that few bore around these parts. His eyes were uneven but sharp, and his pretty lips formed a word I couldn’t understand just yet. My ears were ringing louder than the person’s words, but the more my eyes bore into the stranger’s terrified ones, the clearer everything once again became.

“Run!” His shrill voice was raspy as I was forcefully shoved back and I stumbled for a moment until I regained my bearings.

I could move, I could hear, I could feel.

My body trembled as that familiar cackle echoed around me once again, and I realized the gorgeous stranger was one of the Dryads who whispered in the trees. He looked more scared than I had ever felt, and with a hand reaching out for him desperately to pull him with myself, my feet kicked off before the cold darkness could touch my skin.

And then, as quickly as it came, the vision was gone. I was shaken awake by the frantic calls of my name and warm hands that gripped my arms with tremors. “Y/N! My beloved, please, Y/N. Iris, please, wake up!”

My eyes slowly fluttered open and I realized the curtains were still drawn apart to allow the moonlight inside, to honour Selene and perhaps greet her when she passed on the sky with her chariot. Even if one could hide from Zeus, Selene and Helios saw and knew everything. But my vision was soon obscured by two bright eyes, an amber nobody else I knew had as they shook in fright and bore into mine, searching for anything wrong. My body felt tense and my throat a little parched, but other than that, I was alright. I knew I had been dreaming, I knew a vision came to me, but everything felt wrong. There was something just not right about the vision, about the way it occurred, about the man that showed itself to me. It took me a few seconds to register everything I had seen, and soon, my eyes were just as glazed over with fear as Hongjoong’s. I shot up and cradled my knees to my chest as Hongjoong settled down behind me, reluctant to touch me as he exhaled shakily.

“My beloved, what is the matter?” He questioned quietly, his voice pained, “I cannot help if you don’t talk to me. Was it another night terror, Iris?”

I gulped and my arms tightened around my legs a little bit more, “A vision, Hermes, an omen. Something bad is about to happen, he’s coming for me.”

There was rustling behind me and then I felt the press of a firm chest against my back, strong arms wrapping around my middle to pull me back into the warm body of my lover. I sighed, but my muscles remained tense as I tried to shake away the lingering feelings of the vision. Somebody was out there to get me. Somebody sent by Zeus, once again, and they were close, too close for comfort. The snake almost managed to touch me, perhaps it represented the mortal or traitor, even, that Zeus had sent. I wouldn’t put it past him to send the dirtiest of those that he had once cast away to bring me back to him so that he could enslave me once again.

“Nothing bad will happen, Y/N,” Hongjoong whispered as his chin came to rest on my shoulder. He turned his head and his soft brown hair tickled my cheek in the process, “You are with me and I will do everything to keep you safe, I have promised. No, I have sworn on my immortality, I’ll never let him find you, my beloved.”

Hongjoong’s tone was soft and tender as his fingers gripped my sheer nightgown tightly, pressing his front to the back of my body as tightly as he could, his hot lips brushing against my ear almost teasingly. I gulped, remembering the fear in the Dryad’s eyes too vividly, it had felt too real. I couldn’t even tell if he was part of the vision or if he had managed to cause a rift in the Cosmos to consciously warn me of the danger that was now closer than ever before. We’ve managed to stay hidden for so long, the fear of losing my freedom again was all-consuming and terrifying.

“The Dryad was terrified,” I whispered as my eyes coated over with the remnants of the vision, hard to erase such a look from my mind, “I don’t even think he was part of my vision. There was an eagle too in my dream, Hongjoong.”

My lover’s gulp was audible and I turned my face to face his, prompting Hongjoong to lean back just a bit so that we could stare into each other’s eyes. Suddenly, a soft smile graced his lips and my heartbeat picked up just a little bit, my tense muscles finally easing and letting me become putty in Hongjoong’s comforting embrace.

“He won’t touch you.” There was a menace in his tone, warning and promising of pain, his eyes glazed over with fire for a second, memories taking him away from me, but Hongjoong quickly returned as his eyes cleared, tone more passionate than before, “If there’s anyone that can keep you captive, then that’s me because I’ll forever treat you with respect and love, care and tenderness. I’ll be your slave if that’s what you want me to be, I’ll prove to you again and again how devoted I am, I’ll treat you like a Queen if that’s who you want to be, Y/N. But most of all, I’ll run until the end of Earth for you if that means I can keep you safe, I’ll run and never stop. I’ll never step foot into Olympus ever again if that keeps you safe from those tyrants.”

“Don’t say that.” I whispered as Hongjoong’s left arm untangled from around my torso so that he could cup my cheek, “With me gone, it’s already hard for everyone to keep up. I’m making you do all the work by yourself, it’s unfair. If you’ll be gone too, I fear our fates will be dire once we are discovered.”

“I know more than he’ll ever know, Y/N, I carry all secrets and strategies. If he tries to separate us or threatens to turn us into stars, I’ll know how to corner him.” A smirk that would frighten any mortal crossed Hongjoong’s lips, “And I will threaten to throw him off if he doesn’t back off.”

I knew no matter what I said to my lover his resolve wouldn’t break, it was of no use trying to convince Hongjoong that if he went against Zeus he most certainly would perish. No matter how much you knew, not even his own weaknesses could stop the God, he was the father of us all after all, and Hongjoong was merely a deity that had more power and free will than those unlucky like me.

“I love you.” The confession bubbled past my quivering lips, and I watched Hongjoong’s Adam's Apple bob up and down as he swallowed, eyes darkening with want and fire that was perfectly reflected in his amber irises. Our human bodies were more fragile than our godly forms, they felt everything so much deeper, so much more passionately. I couldn’t help but succumb to the fire that licked at my skin as our warm lips pressed together, hungry and never satiated with the other as Hongjoong gently grabbed my hips and manoeuvred me around until I was sat atop him. Our lips smacked together with a languid pace and our teeth clumsily clanked together whenever one of us bit the other’s bottom lip eagerly, my long fingers finding purchase in Hongjoong’s wavy strands as his calloused hands guided my core over his clothed member. The soft fabric of his sleepwear was thin and hid nothing as he grunted at the first drag of my hips forward and back, making me eagerly swallow the sounds he was making. One warm hand settled on my thigh, underneath my nightgown, and slowly bunched up the fabric until it rested just above my hips.

Desire licked at my insides as hotness spread through my body, cheeks flushed as Hongjoong’s hands traced invisible patterns into my skin, his touch leaving a trail of goosebumps as they slowly slithered towards my lower back, digging into my flesh. I sighed against his mouth before pulling back to tilt his head back and press kisses against his well-defined jaw, the moonlight making his appearance godlier than he ever was in his deity form. I moaned against his simmering skin as his nails dug into the flesh of my bottom, heat pooling in my lower stomach as he pressed me down just harder on his clothed member, drawing out a moan from both of us as my bare core ground right on top of it. The wetness between my legs only became more prominent and I bit into the flesh of his neck, making Hongjoong’s head fall back as he breathed through his mouth loudly, a whine falling past them every time I sucked a little harder, every time I let him drag my core over his hard member, hot despite the fabric separating us.

“I love you.” He gasped into the silence as his hands settled on my thighs again, my hips moving on their own as the friction had started feeling too good to stop, leaving a dark patch on his light-coloured trousers, which mixed with his own precum. I pressed a long kiss against his lips as I fiddled with the hem of his trousers and hastily pulled them down, freeing his member as I eagerly aligned myself up with it, our eyes meeting before I sunk on it. Hongjoong’s grip tightened on my thighs and he whimpered as I hugged him close to my body, fingers tangling into his hair once again, offering an anchor as my walls clamped down on his length. Hongjoong was safe, home was where he was, and I never wished to be anywhere else but in his arms. He saw past my gift and looked at my soul, he appreciated me and worshipped me for who I truly was and not for why everyone seemed to want me. Just a seer, a lowly deity that was able to glance into the future and sometimes the present. Hongjoong never demanded of me to look into his future, to spy on a vision for him, he only asked me to love him back. But he didn’t have to ask, I had always known if there was any mortal or deity I could love, it was him.

The muscles of my thighs tensed as I tentatively rose before sinking back down on his dick, making Hongjoong groan as he leaned back to support himself with one hand, bracing my hip with his other as he gently guided me. I let my hands rest on his shoulders as he snapped his hips upwards and ripped a moan out of me, making me meet his thrusts eagerly as our movements synced up, the slapping sounds became louder and louder in the confinement of our bedroom as we both lost each other to the feeling of overwhelming lust and love, the desire to possess and be possessed, to belong to someone, to love and be loved.

But life had not always been like this. For centuries and centuries, it hadn’t been like this but full of torment, pain, and demands that seemingly never came to an end. Everyone always wanted something from me, they always took and took, but they never gave back anything. I understood my role in the Cosmos, and as the bearer of messages between the mortals and Gods, I knew I had to be flexible and report whenever I was needed. I had to prioritize my purpose and place everyone above myself, it’s just how nature worked. And it had been alright, I felt most fulfilled when I was doing what my calling was, when I was guiding Gods and mortals alike, stringing them onto the right path headed towards a bright future. But I was naïve and careless, I hadn’t realized that once the knowledge of the full extent of my powers fell into the wrong hands it would be exploited, that it would turn against me and hurt me in the process. Glancing into the future, predicting silly things like the weather, and warning mortals of floods or wildfires soon turned into commands and demands of looking into the fate of a disobeying God or Goddess, into spying on those that dared turn against Zeus, of migraine after migraine when I was at my wit's end, begging to be left alone to recharge and step away from the visions.

Zeus was unforgiving and violent, greedy and desperate to control everything and everyone around him. When the word of me being a seer got to him, my freedom was stripped and I never saw the sunlight unless I had orders to deliver a message. My visions became constant because I just had to do what he told me if I didn’t want to turn into a star, and my body and mind were exhausted. I couldn’t sleep, sometimes I would get stuck in a vision for weeks on end, unable to break free, becoming a prisoner of my own mind. It was terrifying and excruciatingly painful; I couldn’t tell whether I was still alive or not. It was silly, a deity never dies as long as it has worshippers, but my soul felt so tired I wished all mortals would drop dead so that my existence would cease too.

Zeus hid me away from everyone, he lied to Hera that I decided to reside on a secluded island down amongst the humans and wished not to be spoken to or reached out to unless the message was time-bound and very important. I had been an important messenger of Hera, and my heart broke when I felt her trust and respect in me vane, but what hurt, even more, was that she never questioned her lover, that she never actually tried to look for me and see if the God was indeed saying the truth. What hurt the most, even in my deity form, was that nobody actually cared enough about me to come and rescue me from the terrorizing clutches of Zeus, that nobody loved and respected me to save me from the torment I had to go through for centuries on end. Everything hurt, even speaking and sleeping, I was nothing but a shell of what I once used to be. Zeus never cared, he just wanted the visions, he threw me around until the physical pain became so unbearable that I just had to scavenge my mind for even a trace of a vision. I became scared of my own power, of what he’d to do me if I didn’t learn how to control it better.

And then one night, or day I couldn’t tell, as I lay exhausted on the cold marble floor of the room Zeus had imprisoned me into, there was a whoosh of a breeze inside and the shatter of a vase. I had no idea what’s happened, I couldn’t see quite right and my head was pounding, covering everything in an unclear haze. But something metallic was hurled underneath my long fingers and when my index finger curiously poked against it a vision so sudden and harsh that it knocked the wind out of my lungs clouded my eyes with flashes of a handsome and somewhat familiar face, smile mischievous yet menacing, his amber eyes ablaze and raging. I had known of him, of course, I have, but we’ve never quite crossed paths, so it was bizarre to get a vision so suddenly of Hermes. It wasn’t even Zeus asking me to look into him, I wasn’t even forcing my mind and soul to connect with it, it just came by itself. Tears flooded my unseeing eyes at the feeling and I tried not to sob upon realizing that my soul was still somewhat aligned with the Cosmos despite how much I’ve forced myself to see and hear everything, having broken the order of the Universe.

And the vision of Hermes persisted for months on end, until, the marble door separating me from freedom was blown into bits and pieces and the God rushed inside with flushed cheeks and a ragged breath. He said nothing as he scooped me up in his arms, lips hot as they pressed against my cold forehead, and for the first time since my existence, my heart started beating in an uneven pattern, fingers digging into the silky fabric of his shirt as I begged him to save me. Hermes looked angry, but not at me, he looked at me with pity in his eyes but said nothing as he broke the glass of the window with the heel of his foot. I couldn’t remember much as I lost consciousness after that, but I felt the wind blow around us harshly as we fell freely, descending into a realm that was familiar yet new, a cocoon of lush green trees and springs that were clearer than the sky and sun hotter than the rays in Olympus, a place that soon became our new home.

The paths leading down the mountain range were soon after our arrival covered in cobblestones, creating an easy and clear passage for the villagers of Ano Skotina, Palaioi Poroi and Palaios Panteleimonas down to Dion, which resided at the foothill of Mount Olympus. The villagers had put in hard work once Hermes brought up his idea, and with his help, it only took the men a few weeks to construct the paths and connect the otherwise strenuous trek for the villagers if they wished to travel between the settlements. But with our arrival it seemed that the fauna and flora flourished more than before, the villagers became livelier and eagerly awaited the appearance of a rainbow which hadn’t been spotted in ages by the mortals.

Having been saved from the clutches of Zeus, I was finally regaining myself. Hongjoong stood by my side every single step of the journey and he offered a helping hand when it all became too much and too exhausting. He hid me away from all the deities and promised to settle down in a village where Zeus would never find us. We couldn’t go far from Olympus as he still had to fulfil his duties, but with me gone, Zeus had no insight into anyone, he wouldn’t know who had stolen his slave away from him.

But even if we were hiding in plain sight, we’d never be safe from him.

On the days that the Gods and Goddesses were too busy bickering with each other, forgetting all about their worshippers, the sky seemed to be clearer and a lighter blue. On days like that it was safe for me to leave the confines of Ano Skotina and hike down to Dion with Hongjoong. I loved days like this because as much as I was scared of Zeus finding us, I loved the loudness of the bustling town, the liveliness and eagerness on the faces of mortals, and most importantly, I loved the market where we could trade fresh flowers and fruits. If the weather deemed good and the deities remained preoccupied with their selfish deeds, Hongjoong and I would follow the path down to the sea and dip in the warm but refreshing water. Poseidon wasn’t always around, busy with his errands, so, it was safe to explore the beautiful sea in his absence.

Given our origins, it took Hongjoong and me around an hour to descend from the mountainside down into the town, our talaria polished and well-kept. We hid them in Hongjoong’s satchel as soon as we neared the closest settlement to avoid being discovered by the humans. Sneaking around always brought a little sense of excitement, of my blood boiling hotter and my heart pumping faster, only heightened when Hongjoong would playfully chase me down the cobblestone-covered paths inside of Dion, heads turning our way as they watched on curiously. There wasn’t a day where boredom could threaten to kidnap me if Hongjoong was around, he’s had plenty of time to observe the earthlings and find out what would be amusing and help the time pass by faster. Not that I wished for that to happen, I cherished every second I spent next to Hongjoong, clinging to him despite our unlimited time.

Being with him had always felt right, from the very moment he lifted me in his arms to save me from Zeus. There was something about his eyes that assured me that we were right for each other, that it was written in the stars, that my suffering for so long wasn’t fruitless. He had known he had to save me when he accidentally caught a glimpse of me through the barely open door of my cell-like room, Zeus’ voice booming as he demanded a vision from me before he could send Hermes on his way to deliver his message. He had returned just days later and snuck inside my room to assess the situation, accidentally knocked over a vase when he heard someone approach the door, then fled through the open window. He couldn’t return for months; Zeus was suspicious of him and he was scared if he was caught we’d both perish. But he remained vigilant and at last came back for me.

I made sure to remain close to Hongjoong’s side as the market was packed with more people than usual this afternoon, our pinkies reaching out for each other whenever the other strayed closer. He was discussing something I couldn’t hear with a blacksmith, wondering whether he had more metal to trade with him as my attention remained on the flower stall and the lovely old lady who always had the brightest smile on her face. Her grey strands were beautiful and highlighted her age nicely, and despite her late age, her demeanour was just as youthful as a child’s.

When our eyes met, she beckoned me over with a happy look on her face. Casting Hongjoong a quick glance to make sure he hadn’t moved away yet, I made my way over to the vendor and bowed my head in greetings, “My dear! I haven’t seen you in too long, I was worried about you.”

“My apologies for worrying you, kind soul, I haven’t been able to leave my village.” I kept my answer as vague as possible as her eyebrows furrowed in slight worry. Lately, the deities were busy watching over their desperate worshippers so I couldn’t risk my safety and cover.

“That boy of yours isn’t keeping you captive, is he?” Her eyes narrowed as my cheeks flushed and I quickly shook my head, not keen on her choice of words. I hated hearing anything that had a connection to captivity, and just the thought of Hongjoong keeping me as his prisoner was disgusting and infuriating.

“He would never,” My voice was harsher than intended, “He cherishes me more than anyone ever has.”

“Good, good.” The vendor muttered as her features relaxed once again, “Would you like some pomegranates? I traded them just this morning, I hear they’ve been blessed by Aphrodite herself. Perhaps they’ll make me look youthful once again.”

The old lady giggled as she grabbed the fruit and extended her hand towards me, making my muscles tense at the mention of the deity. If it truly had been blessed by the Goddess I didn’t want to touch it, let alone eat it. She hadn’t been the kindest to me in our years of knowing each other, and despite knowing that Zeus held me in a chamber as his slave, she never said anything to anyone.

“Thank you, but I must refuse you. I do not have anything to trade it with.” The vendor shrugged and put the fruit away, her fingers grazing against the petals of a sunflower. My eyes followed the action and I yearned to do the same, the yellowness of the flower reminded me of my own rainbow’s colour. It had been a while since I had brought upon the earth a rainbow, I missed its beauty and comforting colours.

“Your scarf seems to be made of silk,” The old lady hummed as she eyed me curiously, “I’ll give you a bouquet of sunflowers if you trade it with me, I know they are your favourite flowers.”

I gulped and gripped the scarf, pondering whether it was worth trading something of high value with something that had little value. But the piece of fabric held no sentimental value to me and autumn would be soon approaching, the old lady needed the scarf more than I did for her body was weaker than mine will ever be. And she was right, I did love sunflowers, it’s been too long since I could hold them in my hands, so, I nodded and untied the scarf from around my neck.

“You’ll seriously trade that beautiful piece for sunflowers?” The vendor next to the old lady asked with scepticism, a dark-haired woman with bushy eyebrows and greediness that wasn’t missed by the mortals either. The old lady ignored her as she tied a big bouquet together for me, happy to trade them.

“I can find many more scarves like this one, but summer is soon ending and I’ll have to wait a long time until sunflowers bloom again,” I answered with a soft smile and took the flowers after I handed over my scarf. The old lady took her time to examine it carefully and I glanced behind myself to see where Hongjoong was. He had moved on to another stall and he was surrounded by several men now as they conversed animatedly, his face bright under the sunlight and amber eyes glinting with interest.

“You have such little value for your possessions.” The other vendor grumbled, and the old lady laughed as she shook her head at the younger woman. I said nothing as I cradled the bouquet against my chest, looking down at the flowers to examine them. Its petals were soft between my fingertips and I took note that its hue was much more vibrant than the colour in my own rainbow, perhaps I could make mine more prominent too.

“The only possession I want to have is over my beloved, nothing else matters to me.”

“Oh, to be young and completely enraptured with a man.” The old lady mused with a knowing look on her face once I looked up at her, my cheeks dusted pink as I realized I had spoken my mind too freely, “I haven’t seen a pair as devoted as you two are to each other.”

“There must be some, I cannot imagine not loving with your whole soul and being—”

“Love is just a fairytale the deities made up to wrangle us around by the nose and manipulate us into doing whatever they want.” The other vendor lady snapped as she interrupted me, and my eyebrows furrowed at her harsh words. Certainly, if any deity were to hear her, her place in the Underworld would be assured and arranged to be painful. The old lady hissed and gave the other vendor an irritated look.

“Quit being so pessimistic, especially to such a young soul.” Before the other vendor could say anything else, the old lady faced me with a curious look, “You must be coming tonight to the offering, right? Zeus will bless you and then you will never part from your lover, he’s great like that.”

Zeus was anything but great, but I didn’t want to ruin the lady’s image of the deity. If I were a maiden praying to Zeus to watch over my lover, he’d rather take me as his lover than offer us his protection. Zeus was horrible like that. But the thought of him made me shiver and I tried to ignore my tensing muscles. I had no idea it was already that time of the month, Hongjoong must’ve forgotten too, otherwise, we would’ve never come down to Dion today of all days.

“I’m afraid I won’t be joining you tonight, I haven’t been feeling well these past few days.” A curious look crossed both of the ladies' eyes and I gulped nervously as I started feeling jittery. I realized I had conversed with them for too long and it was time I returned to the safety of Hongjoong, where nobody would bother me anymore or ask questions.

“You must be with child, then.” The younger vendor declared and my eyebrows furrowed as I cast a glance at her. I most certainly wasn’t with child, I would’ve felt it, but if that lie helped stop more curious questions, then I would take it.

“I am not sure, but perhaps I am,” I answered and the old lady gasped, eyes falling to my belly.

“That is great news, indeed! May the child have your peculiar hair colour and his father’s beautiful eyes.” She wished earnestly and I smiled, feeling just a little bit guilty that Hongjoong and I weren’t actually expecting a child anytime soon. But I blinked my eyes faster and looked down abashed, resisting the urge to shuffle my feet. Deciding that I should return to my lover’s side now, I bid the two vendors my sincerest goodbyes and turned around to search the crowd for Hongjoong. He was a couple of steps away, doing the same, and his eyes lit up when they found me. He had a wide grin on his lips and he waved his fingers playfully as he took off towards me, his steps bouncy and giddy. I chuckled and stopped to let him reach me first, but as I did so, a child narrowly avoided colliding with me as his warm skin brushed against my hand.

The sudden change of scenery managed to knock the wind from my lungs as I gasped and looked around, the market was eerily empty and the sun was hidden behind clouds as suddenly it started becoming darker and darker outside. White mist left my lips as I breathed through my mouth loudly, the temperature having severely dropped made me shiver in my summer gown, head whipping around as I searched for another living soul. But there was no one, not even Hongjoong, and I clenched my palms into fists when I heard the hauntingly familiar cackle once again. The Dryads weren’t here whispering again and I wondered if I’d see the young man once again, if he’d come to warn me again. But nothing happened until an eagle screamed in the distance and then a dark shadow appeared just by the entrance to the market. Its features were unrecognizable, but it towered over the gate as its silver orbs vibrated, looking wildly my way. I gasped and tried to take steps backwards, but I was trapped once again. I felt warm hands touching my arms, a muffled voice worriedly calling my name and something wet pressing against my cheek. The darkness persisted, however, and the shadow cackled once again as the eagle screamed and was suddenly plummeting down towards me, sharp claws drawn and beak parting. But before it could touch me, rip me apart, my eyes flew open.

The loudness of the market made my head thump in pain and I realized I was clutching onto Hongjoong’s shirt tightly as I tried to regain my breathing. My eyes searched to crowd frantically for the shadow, but also to make sure nobody saw my episode. Hongjoong’s arms were warm and slightly trembling as they pulled me into a tight embrace, his lips pressing against my temple as he sighed loudly, “You’re alright, I got you. Let’s head back home, my beloved.”

I nodded wordlessly as Hongjoong took my hand in his and manoeuvred us around the crowd, making sure nobody familiar ran into us so that we’d be able to leave faster. I appreciated his attentiveness as I followed after him, my fingers tightening against his as the crowd was slowly vanning out the closer we reached the end of the town. His features softened once he slowed down to let me fall in step with him, and I raised our joined hands to press a kiss against his hand, “Thank you.”

He said nothing but his amber eyes turned warmer as red swirled behind his irises, his wavy brown hair falling into his eyes and making him look boyish. I chuckled and pressed up on my tiptoes to steal a kiss from Hongjoong, making his eyes widen as a man had just passed us on his horse, his lips widening into an amused smile at our display of affection. I knew my lover was blushing red when he turned his head away, but he squeezed my hand once to let me know he appreciated the gesture, “I saw him again, the shadow, the darkness, the eagle. You know it’s Zeu—”

“Do not speak his name.” Hongjoong cut me off roughly, all previous warmth gone from his features as he faced me abruptly, “Don’t say it, Y/N, I hate it when you do. I hate him, and everything he’s done to you. You are safe with me and nothing will happen to you, I have sworn and I will keep swearing.”

“I know,” I muttered, gulping nervously as I averted my eyes, “but the visions never lie, my love, he’s close, I am not safe anymore.”

I tried not to yelp when suddenly two warm palms cradled my cheeks and yanked me close to Hongjoong’s face, his ablaze eyes boring into mine with fury and determination, “You are mine and if anyone, mortal or deity, touches you, I will burn them until nothing’s left of them. You have suffered enough, I will not let anyone take advantage of you ever again, Iris, it’s over.”

My eyes fluttered closed as my heart thumped wildly, and I leaned forward to press a lasting kiss against Hongjoong’s lips, who pressed his body incredibly close to mine, “You wear my petasos, my beloved, everyone knows you’re mine. Everyone knows what will happen to them if they try to claim you, I won’t allow it anymore.”

His voice was deeper as he spoke up once our lips weren’t pressing against each other and I licked my lips as I nodded, smoothing out the creases between his eyebrows. A silly thought came to mind as Hongjoong’s eyes searched my face and I chuckled as I leaned so close my lips brushed against his when I spoke again, “The vendor ladies think I am with child.”

Hongjoong’s breath stuttered and his pupils dilated as one of his hands grabbed my hips, pressing my body painfully so into his, “Perhaps you should be with child, my beloved.”

“Do you want that?” I asked in a whisper, throat feeling dry as I tried to ignore the fire spreading through my body. This greedy little human body could be so lustful.

“Yes, I want you full of my seed and belly round and pretty.” Hongjoong’s voice was deep as he answered and I had to take a second to compose myself, trying to be the bigger person right now. It wouldn’t be the first time things got a little bit out of hand while we were in public, and I didn’t want something as mortifying to happen again. Last time we were lucky the unfortunate soul who saw us in a scandalous predicament had been an older lady and her husband, both understanding and giggling as they rushed away from the scene. Truthfully, we could’ve picked a more secluded spot and the back of a bar that was often frequented.

“We’re being indecent, Hongjoong.”

“Then let me take you home and show you just how much I want you to carry our child.”

“Hongjoong.”

One of us had to attend the offering, it was inevitable, and since nobody knew of my location but with Hermes still around, it wasn’t a question that it would be him who would descent to Dion tonight and bring a small flower crown made from my sunflowers and the neighbour’s weeds as his own offering. As a deity, we didn’t have to attend such worshipping customs, but since we were disguising ourselves as mortals it would look suspicious if we didn’t tag along from time to time. I never showed my face around when they were bringing offerings to Zeus as he often liked to disguise himself and come down, watch his loyal followers, and even take maidens to bed and spread his bloodline, but when they would show gratitude for Isis, I made sure to tag along. A deity recognized a deity even in disguise, and despite her catching me at her altar more than once, she never said anything. She could feel my pain, she could see past my smile and looked into my battered soul. She was sensitive and kind, instead of bringing me to Zeus, she blessed me and healed my wounds so that nothing could hurt me so horrendously ever again.

Once we had gotten back from Dion, Hongjoong was busy showing me just how much he really wanted me to carry our child, very reluctant to leave the bed to get ready for the night. I knew he didn’t want to go, he knew I didn’t want to be left alone tonight out of all nights, but we also both knew that we did not have a choice. Deities rarely had a choice, the greater good just always seemed to call out to us. But still, I helped him bathe and dress up, I cooked him a warm dinner and braided little strands of his soft hair while he was busy chiselling his talaria, his petasos already pristine, the leather smelling fresh and feeling soft under the skin.

“Are you certain I must go?” Hongjoong asked with a sigh once he was done with his talaria, eyebrows furrowed as he looked up at me. I ran my fingers through his hair and ruffled the strands that fell into his eyes.

“Yes, my love, you must.” I hummed quietly and Hongjoong sighed long, “We hadn’t attended the offerings in a while, the townsfolk will get suspicious of us at this rate and I quite like this place.”

“I like it here too, it’s serene.” He hummed absentmindedly and I stepped back to let him wear his winged sandals, raising to his feet to test out their agility. He was fast, as always, in good shape and ready to tackle the night’s challenges. I smiled at him proudly as he came to stand in front of me, hands settling on my hips as he licked his lips and looked down at my mouth, “If anything feels wrong, go over to Mr. Do, he will keep you company.”

“I don’t think poor old Mr. Do will be able to tackle a god like Zeus if he shows up,” I said with a chuckle as I circled my arms around Hongjoong’s shoulders, standing on my tiptoes to reach his face better. He chuckled as his eyes searched my face, the amber swirling as fear made its way shown, “I will be alright, Hongjoong, don’t you worry.”

“Of course you will be.” He answered with a scoff as if Zeus showing up was such an impossible feat, “And when I return, I will show you once again just how eager I am to have you with child, to spend the rest of my eternity with you and our son or daughter. I want them to have your kindness and faith, and I want them to have my determination and strength.”

“Aren’t you thinking a bit far ahead, my love?” I asked with a snicker as Hongjoong pouted and shook his head.

“Of course I’m not, my beloved, the seed has been planted, we both felt it.” Hongjoong lowered his face and I watched as his lips parted, “The shift in the Universe has happened, the stars aligned for our love once again, Y/N.”

“We’ve been blessed.” I whispered and tangled my fingers in the hair at his nape, pushing Hongjoong’s face closer to mine, “I am fully yours now.”

“You’ve always been fully mine,” Hongjoong’s voice dropped as his fingers dug into my skin through the fabric of my gown, “only mine.”

I hummed and leaned my head back as his warm lips pressed against mine, instantly eager as they pressed together firmly and forcefully, asking me to part my lips for him. Hongjoong moaned when my tongue dragged against his, coaxing him in deeper as our saliva mixed and tongues brushed together, lighting my skin on fire. My heart pumped faster and my skin jittered, hushed voices and hazy orbs fluttering behind my eyes as a vision threatened to kidnap me from this moment. But I stopped it, I wanted to enjoy the touch of my lover, the sounds of my lover, as I knew the darkness would be back if I were to succumb to the greater force.

Our pace was languid as Hongjoong dragged each kiss out, sucking on my bottom lip before he’d dive right back in, sucking on my tongue too and making me whimper as my hand found an anchor in his nape, holding him as if I were afraid he’d pull back too soon. But he didn’t, he soaked up in the sounds and only kissed me more desperately, pulling back for air when it became too much for our human bodies. I was breathing hard and Hongjoong struggled to even out his pants, our foreheads pressing together as he cleared his throat once and then twice. He licked his lips and then pursed them, fingers twitching as he raised his hands to cup my cheeks, “I wish to return earlier tonight, I’m not done with you yet, Y/N. I have figured if I go earlier and stay for a shorter amount of time it should be fine, Zeus will want me to report back to him so I’ll try to make my journey as fast as possible.”

“I’ll be right here so don’t rush yourself, I don’t want anything to happen to you,” I said worriedly as we untangled from each other, I tried to smooth out the knots I created in Hongjoong’s hair. His outfit remained spotless, the black fabric tight and secure around his strong and well-built body, hugging him snuggly in places that wouldn’t restrict his movement.

“I’m too restless to remain until the end of the festivity either way,” Hongjoong shrugged and kissed my cheek before he went to grab his petasos, “Go to Mr. Do if anything feels even a little bit wrong.”

“I will, I promise.” I smiled reassuringly as my lover headed for the front door, pausing to turn back around with a worrisome look on his face. I knew he was reluctant to go, but he had no choice. One of us had to go and it was him, it was always him, he’d have to report back to Olympus either way and he was right, the quicker he got over with everything, the faster he could return to me. But as soon as the door closed behind me and I was left alone in our safe abode, dark visions clouded my eyes and sent me tumbling to the floor.

The evening had been harsh to me, the visions seemed to turn only darker as the hours passed by, taunting me. It felt as if I wasn’t in control anymore, as if it was someone else controlling what I saw. My heart pumped fast and my head thumped wildly making my ears ring, and I felt boneless as I tried to stand from the chair I managed to drag myself into. My sight was hazy as I felt around the table for the glass of spring water Hongjoong and I had collected earlier this day, but I failed to reach the cool glass and thus gave up as a harsh wave of nausea almost made me gag. I had never reacted to my abilities so harshly, I couldn’t determine whether it was worrisome or not that my body was having such visceral reactions to the darkness that seemed to linger in the corner of my eyes.

I knew that I was alone in the house and that my visions were tricking me into believing someone was watching me from the shadows, candles unlit as I found the task too strenuous to do with my current state. It all felt too real, it made me scared of how easily my body was succumbing to the terror-filled memories that followed my bodily reactions. It wasn’t the first time my body threatened to shut down, but it’s been far too long since I had felt so sick. It made me remember my captivity and everything I had to endure at Zeus’ hands when he pushed my body over the limit and forced me to become nothing but a vessel that relayed the visions of a seer. I was scared because Hongjoong wasn’t here and because I couldn’t figure out just exactly what was triggering this reaction. All of Isis’ blessings seemed futile all of a sudden, and I found myself wondering whether I could ask the Goddess for guidance and help in dire need, a beckon of light to help me survive until Hongjoong returned and figured out a way to stop my suffering.

But I remembered that Mr. Do was a healer of sorts, a little too old and grumpy, but the villagers loved him and trusted him with their lives countless times before, I have seen it firsthand. Hongjoong and he seemed to have a mutual respect and a deeper understanding of the other’s force that I failed to see and sense. And despite every muscle and joint in my body protesting when I finally pushed myself up into a standing position, I found Hongjoong’s deep trust in the old man a reassuring thought that pushed me to take action and bring myself to the old man’s doorstep, perhaps he knew how to fix this. I had barely reached the front door of my house when my muscles locked up as if they sensed danger, my skin tingling in a way only around another deity it did. But I was alone inside the house, it made no sense, perhaps my seer abilities became uncontrollable and started lashing out in peculiar ways.

I swung the door open, finding the task difficult as my body vehemently tried to disobey my mind’s commands, and despite the haze that clouded my sight, Mr. Do’s small frame not even a few steps away was unmistakable. I hadn’t noticed, but the wind was howling as it bent the weaker branches of trees in odd ways and not one candle was lit inside the neighbouring huts. Cold darkness wrapped around us and I shuddered as it bit at my skin mercilessly, “Mr. Do?”

My voice sounded breathless and pained and my eyebrows furrowed as the older man stepped closer so that I could see him clearly, “Oh, you look sickly, my dear. Let’s head inside.”

I couldn’t find it in myself to object and stepped back inside my house as Mr. Do followed, his height shorter than my lover’s. It seemed to be relatively warmer inside the house, but I still shuddered as I brought the shawl tighter around my shoulders, pressing my nose against the fabric as it smelled like Hongjoong. It brought little comfort, but I relished in it as I willed my sight to clear, at least that little if nothing else seemed to be right with me. Mr. Do seemed curious as his eyes searched the place and I watched him with slight confusion, wondering if it’s been too long since he’d stepped inside our house. But it looked as it always did, the interior hadn’t changed since last week when Hongjoong insisted on having the old man over for dinner as a payment for his kindness after he healed Hongjoong’s broken fingers. It was a freak accident; one he couldn’t heal down here unless he wanted to be caught by the mortals.

“What is bothering you, my dear?” The warm smile felt wrong on Mr. Do’s face, he was someone who never smiled nor showed affection, his face a mask of coldness and uninterest. He never used nicknames and he had never once in his life before directly addressed me. Mr. Do seemed to be afraid to say my name for some reason and he always brought pastries whenever there was a rainbow in the sky, that’s the most emotion he had ever shown. That’s how I knew he didn’t completely mistrust me or hate me. This man standing in front of me was not Mr. Do. But it was too late now, I had already welcomed him inside. I quickly realized that despite his disguise, he couldn’t hide his godly aura, the faint glow around his body or the respect it demanded.

“Why are you here?” Despite my voice being faint, it carried conviction, and braveness, “What do you want?”

“My little seer back.” The man disguised as Mr. Do chuckled and walked further inside the house, walking around as he touched vases and ornaments that clearly belonged to Hermes, “You must understand my utter shock when I found out she was gone. My utter anger and annoyance when I searched for her relentlessly and she was just gone as if swallowed by the earth itself. I assumed it was Hades at first, we know how he likes to play me and taunt me, but when I found him gone from his kingdom and meddling with humans from far away times, I realized something more peculiar had happened.”

I didn’t dare speak up as Zeus walked closer, the face of Mr. Do scrunching up as he tsked, “Imagine my utter confusion and rage when I find out Hermes, my precious messenger and guide, decided to settle amongst the mortals. Not only did I lose my seer, but my messenger too.”

“Hermes never stopped serving you.” My voice was harsh as I willed the bile down my throat and blinked my eyes quickly to try and get rid of the haze, which was very possibly induced by Zeus himself. I understood why my body lashed out like this, it sensed danger and it was warning me. But it was too late now, I had walked myself into Zeus’ trap.

“He didn’t, you are right, little seer, but he also started slacking off.” He scoffed and I gulped as I remained put, my feet frozen to the floor, “You must imagine I assumed he was frolicking with the mortals at first, but then certain inaccuracies just stopped making sense, you see. I have other means of looking into my little deities, Iris, I don’t need you—”

“Then why did you keep me for so long?” My voice raised as my sight finally cleared and I was able to glare at Mr. Do’s serene face, fire and anger replacing my fear as I stared the God down, “If you don’t need me, why did you subject me to so much strenuous work and pain? Why did you force me to seek and seek without break, to bend myself and ruin who I once was?”

“The secret to being a deity is so simple, my little seer,” Zeus’ voice was quiet as he walked even closer, eyebrows slightly furrowed, “We are just like these mortals that worship us, we are greedy and selfish and we take without consideration, we possess and we demand, we punish and we slay, so, what sets us apart from them?”

“Immortality, lack of morals and care of those around us,” I whispered, unable to gulp down the lump in my throat anymore as my heart raced faster, ears starting to ring once again.

“Power, abilities that mortals will never have, is what sets us apart, Iris—or should I call you Y/N, now?” Mr. Do chuckled but his voice sounded distorted. My muscles tensed when his short frame suddenly grew taller, towering over me menacingly, “This is why you are such an insignificant deity to most, you are too soft, you love and want to be loved. You wish to belong to someone and to possess someone, it makes you weak. You act more like a mortal than a Goddess.”

“I never felt like I belonged in Olympus,” My face became hard as my eyes narrowed, unafraid to speak my mind for once. A surge of anger pushed me to speak my mind, to stand up for myself and demand the respect I was never given, “I was always pushed away by my kin, made fun of and ostracized. Your own lovely wife made me a slave of hers, and then you. You look down on me and judge me, but you wish to possess just as much as I do, if not more.”

The God remained silent as his jaw ticked and Mr. Do’s face formed into an unfamiliar shape, features mixing with familiar faces, but still unknown. It didn’t stop shifting as Zeus’ eyes bore into mine and it felt like the air was ripped from my lungs as they started squeezing in on itself, choking me as I fell to the side, clutching onto the table tightly.

“I want to punish you direly for thinking you could abandon your ruler, Iris, I really do wish.” His voice was a dark hiss as I tried to breathe, but couldn’t, “But you’re too precious to be turned into foam or a star, Hermes, however, I know just the perfect way to make him suffer for his insubordination.”

My eyes widened at the mention of Hongjoong and I tried to speak, but I couldn’t as dark spots started colouring my vision. I tried to object and scream, but no word left my mouth as I scrapped at my throat in despair while Zeus watched on with an amused expression. He loved seeing his toys fret and beg for mercy, he loved feeling like the King he was, able to rule over everyone and decide everyone’s fate. But before my misery could continue, the door of the house was slammed open and loud panting filled the house.

“I forgot my satchel—” Hongjoong’s breathless words caught in his throat as suddenly the airflow was back in my lungs and I started coughing loudly as my knees gave out and sent me tumbling to the floor. Hongjoong was by my side in an instant, body hot and skin sizzling as he grabbed my cheeks and forced my head up. His amber eyes were almost fully red as he searched for visible injuries and his jaw ticked as he turned his head to face Zeus. He had a vicious look in his eyes and he almost but spat in front of the God as his voice thundered in the confined space, “What are you doing here?!”

“I came for what’s mine—” The laugh that left Hongjoong’s mouth was guttural and it made me shiver as my frantic eyes looked at my lover with despair, begging him to remain level-headed so that he wouldn’t ruin his chances of survival furthermore.

“What’s yours?” Hongjoong spat, eyes falling on me once again to make sure I was alright. He gulped as he cradled my cheeks and I opened my mouth to beg him to stop and walk away, but lips pressed against mine firmly before I was staring back into his wild amber eyes once again. He had made up his mind, and I could do nothing to convince him to stop, to think through whatever action he took next. He was here to protect me and if that meant he’d lose his life in the process, he didn’t care. He had sworn to protect me and I knew he’d do no less than that, “Enlighten me, Zeus, what’s yours again?”

The God seemed appalled by the way Hongjoong spoke to him, face contorting into disgust as he watched my quivering form and Hongjoong’s protective stance as he stood up and shielded me from the God’s furious eyes, “Iris is what’s mine, you fool. I will feed you to Cerberus if you utter one more word—”

But Hongjoong was reckless and he didn’t care as he threw his head back to laugh loudly, hysterically, and I clutched the trousers at his ankle and yanked on them to get him to stop, but he was gone, far gone. He’d go to unimaginable lengths to protect what was his and not even his lover could stop him anymore.

“Cerberus would hack me back up if he were to swallow me, don’t be foolish you old man.” Hongjoong tsked as if he was scrutinizing a child and my heart raced in fear for him, “Besides, Hades likes me too much to let me perish, after all, I make his job a lot easier with all the souls that I carry for him to the gates of the Underworld.”

Zeus hissed and stepped closer, hands balling up into fists. I took notice of the wind picking up frighteningly so outside, to the point it rattled the hinges of the windows, and I could only pray the other villagers wouldn’t be affected by Zeus’ wrath. They haven’t been anything but kind and loving to us, I would never forgive myself if anything were to happen to them.

“Before you destroy this lovely village,” Hongjoong seemed to be thinking the same as he smirked, the look on his face eerie as red swarmed around in his dark irises, overshadowing its beautiful caramel hue, “I must inform you that I have claimed Iris and she has claimed me, so you cannot touch neither one of us, you old fool.”

My cheeks heated despite the predicament and I gulped when deafening silence followed, the wind suddenly disappearing. My heart raced in my chest and it felt like it had ascended into my throat as I felt Hongjoong’s hands around my forearms, helping me up to stand next to him. His smirk remained frightening to any mortal, but the mischievous glint in his eyes told me that he was in control, that the odds were for once in our favour as he smoothed my hair down for me, “And since you are the one that loves to make up foolish rules for your peasants to follow, do I need to remind you what it means when a deity claims someone?”

Zeus just gulped, eyes darting between me and Hongjoong, the veins underneath his skin lightning as they travelled, his eyes turning a misty grey. No one knew Zeus’ real face, but I had come close to seeing it more than once, it was ugly. It reflected the person he was on the inside; he was ugly through and through, no wonder he chose to disguise himself even between his own kin, “I can still use her abilities to my liking, Hermes, that’s not what claiming one enthrals.”

“Oh, does it not now?” Hongjoong chuckled and I felt an arm sneak around my hips until his palm pressed flatly against my belly, his bottom lip between his teeth as raised an eyebrow mockingly, “Even if the seed had been planted to bring forth a new life?”

“She’s pregnant?” Zeus’ voice raised octaves as his eyes widened comically and the fundament of the house shook as I shuddered, clutching onto Hongjoong’s arm for stability. My skin was cold and I was shivering, but Hongjoong remained like a pilar by my side, supporting me and offering me braveness.

“She is pregnant with my child, yes.” Hongjoong’s smirk spread into a wide grin that made him look crazed as his amber eyes simmered in the darkness and the ground shook again. I looked at Zeus reluctantly as I let my hand rest above Hongjoong’s, our fingers tangling together as we held onto my belly. Zeus could feel it too, the shift in the Universe and the change in the alignment of the stars, he knew Hermes and I were fated to be together; he knew if he went against the wishes of the Cosmos, it would be him paying the price and not us. I couldn’t help but huff as I suddenly felt all tension leave my muscles, serenity infusing my brain and body like never before. Hongjoong, too, knew we were safe when his offensive stance relaxed and he stood tall in contentment.

“You are both traitors.” Zeus hissed, but there was no force in his voice, only defeat and despair, “And if I can’t make you pay, the Cosmos will find ways to make you suffer for what you’ve done.”

“Is that what you say to all the mistresses you keep?” My tone was cold and unforgiving, it shocked both Hongjoong and Zeus, “I wish you nothing but an eternity of suffering and misfortune, I wish that all of your children turn on you and bring your demise like you had brought your own father’s, Zeus.”

“Did you just curse me?” His voice boomed as Hongjoong threw his head back and started cackling loudly, bringing a small smile to my lips as I chuckled.

“I am no witch, Zeus, but I believe the Cosmos works in peculiar ways.” I stopped to take a breath, to finally say what I always wished to tell him, “And just because you are supreme to all of us, it doesn’t mean you are invincible. The Cosmos doesn’t differentiate in kind.”

Somewhere in the distance, a bolt of lightning struck and a deafening roar travelled through the forest as Zeus turned into nothing but dust and charged energy, lighting our house in blinding light for a second until everything was covered in darkness and silence. I remained frozen as Hongjoong started giggling, cradling my face as he grinned at me widely, “You are the most breathtaking creature I have ever had the luck to come across, my beloved.”

“I love you too, Hongjoong.” I chuckled and let him kiss me messily before he pulled back and giggled again, unable to contain the giddiness our small victory brought upon the both of us.

“Do you think I still have to report back to him tonight?” The question made me laugh as I threw my arms around his torso and pressed my body against his, revelling in his comforting warmth as I nuzzled my nose against his neck. Hongjoong pressed a chaste kiss against the crown of my head and I melted into his arms, feeling safe and like a weight had been lifted from my chest. We would be alright for the time being, the child would be safe down between the mortals and Zeus would leave us alone for now. I couldn’t tell what the future had in store for us, at least not until a vision came to me, but I didn’t care as long as Hongjoong was by my side.

The Cosmos gifted those deserving and took from those undeserving.

❱❱ Next star

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stairs & life, up / down (oneshot)

✧ gn!reader x kim hongjoong ✧ genre: non idol, slice of life, strangers to love interest, comfort, soft emotional ✧ word count: 10,4k ✧ warnings: adult language, smoking (don’t do it!), loneliness, end of friendships, moving on from a relationship, getting over heartbreaks, facing challenges in life, crying

The ripping sound of paper, the clicking of a mechanical keyboard. Loneliness sounds & feels different to everyone but somehow, Hongjoong feels like you understand his. Yet, you confuse him. Why was your first encounter so bold when he hears you crying at night when you think nobody is listening? The fire escape of the old building suddenly becomes a place of comfort he didn’t expect to find in the loneliest city, filled with millions of people but now, there is you.

a/n: when i think of summer, i think of spending long nights outdoors because it's still warm and you just talk for hours without worrying about whatever happens tomorrow. hongjoong & mc both went through some hardships with different types of relationships but they are where they want to move on, all they needed was a hand to grab them and help them going forward. thanks for reading 🤎

The sound of paper being torn apart was often how Hongjoong would describe what his own heartbeak felt like and maybe, if it wasn’t already in pieces, it would be now. Fifty hours of passion, sleepless nights, and love torn apart, a woman with an unpleasant face hissing when she dropped his art like it was a random document.

“There was no reason to destroy it just because you did not like it,” he finally stated and received glares for daring to speak up. “It was garbage, what exactly did you plan to do with it? In fact, every artwork you have shown me in the past few months has been just that. What was the point in hiring you when your social media works were all fake?!”

Hongjoong wanted to wince but somehow managed to keep it together, being called deceitful as an artist who had given up so much for his art was hard.

“My style is exactly the same as the work you saw when you contacted me and I work the exact same way,” he bit his lip when she stood up and seemed more interested in answering her phone which was constantly buzzing in her overpriced pouch. People of her rank often held no passion at all, they only faked it for the smiles and the press.

”You have another month, if you cannot come up with the proper concept, you are out and of course, we cut your payment in half again. After all, since you came here five months ago, you did not deliver anything we could work with. That’s all.”

Hongjoong was about to demonstrate but the director of the publishing agency just left him standing there.

He never wanted to come to New York, he could not care less about the city everyone wanted to live in but there had been nothing left for him back home. When he found the girl he loved and dated since high school being with another, the one he had given his whole heart to so foolishly, telling him it was a pity that kept them together for so long because just like so many other people around him, she judged him for his passion and his income rather than his values and happiness. Sure, he could survive from what he was doing but in their eyes, it was not worth to be called living. She dreamt of a house with a pool, a nice car, and an expensive beach vacation, rather than a cozy apartment, taking the bus and weekend trips.

On that day, when he was crying and walking through his hometown without direction, his parents said that it was time to finally grow up and work for a mindless ad agency that would gladly take somebody with his talent rather than chase his dreams of being permitted to illustrate an entire children's book, one with a deeper meaning unlike all the projects he was part of so far, where he often designed characters but based on guidelines rather than freely.

The invitation of a publisher seemed to be a wink of fate but now, Hongjoong simply found himself trapped in a city of millions, yet never having been more alone.

Maybe he always had been, considering how blind love made him, believing to hold the love of a woman who cheated on him for who knows how long, likely even making use of his nights of working and being home late.

He had been such a fool.

The small ringing of a bell announced his arrival as he entered the familiar small grocery store which always was the destination at the end of days like today.

One benefit in all of his misery, Hongjoong was used to managing his life with little money, he could live from the shortened salary with some tricking and ignoring cravings. There also had been savings for emergencies, put aside for better times.

“How do you even manage to survive when this is all you eat?” San frowned, pointing at the selection of instant noodles and a few cans as he scanned each one. The store belonged to his family and the student helped out frequently.

Hongjoong offered him a playful little grin: “Magic, Sannie. Now…”

He bit his cheek and the man knew, frowning: “Another package? You said you meant to quit smoking for good… you rather should get dinner rather than spend it on this shit.”

Painted nails brushed through dark wavy hair as he shrugged: “I’m an artist, we need to have some kind of weakness, yes? Unless I suddenly find a muse and that one makes me go insane.”

He knew the other meant well as he sighed but added a package into the plastic bag, handing it to him. “Just look out for yourself.”

Hongjoong smiled at the younger: “I always do. See ya.” The guy did not need to know what he was going through, maybe Hongjoong himself was still trying to understand just that.

It was easy to smile for everyone, he had become an expert in that field. Maybe he should join those TikTokers who made seminars out of canvas pages about something that barely was a secret but called it ‘Guide to Happiness’.

At least, he was about to be home, his haven. Hongjoong had been thrilled when he found the under-the-roof apartment because there was no AC and the building was rundown, the rent was cheap but he loved it because he easily managed to access the roof, there was nothing more beautiful than allowing himself to sulk in loneliness while watching the never sleeping city.

It was almost poetic, wasn’t it?

There also used to be the benefit of being the only one who did not put some shutters on the window which was the entrance to the fire stairs. The view was ugly, but it was handy to simply take the stairs and get right up.

Well, it used to be because the new tenant who moved into the apartment right underneath him did not seem to share the sentiment of the others, the window was always wide open and it would be creepy if he would rush past it.

He lurked up but Hongjoong noticed immediately how it was open again and he sighed, muttering to himself as he made the way up to the longer stairs. Too many. He dodged a few abandoned shoes of children in front of one, a growling dog at the third, and survived!

“I am home.”

When he unlocked the door, silence greeted him. There no longer was anyone who rushed over to smile and welcome him back but now, he was not even sure if that ever happened or merely being an imagination, an altered memory.

His apartment was small but that was okay, he didn’t need a living room and only having a tiny shower made being short less tragic.

While Hongjoong lived up to the cliche of being a poor artist, at least he did not need too much space.

His gaze went over the sketches still scattered over the kitchen table, picking one up: “Guess, you aren’t it either, sorry.” Unlike that awful woman, he carefully formed a small pile and put it in a paper tray for all his rejected designs, so far it had been every single one he offered to them.

Maybe it was time to give up…

No, this was not the time to cry and get sad! Urgh, hard enough to admit he had been such a crybaby when moving here, the way how his heart ached and he was lost among strangers. It was when he started smoking again, something he stopped years ago but now.

There was nobody who would complain about the smell.

Hongjoong slipped into the shower, running water always helped to wash away thoughts, he just imagined it as he carefully cleaned every inch before enjoying the feeling of a fresh pair of clothes and ruffling his hair with a towel.

“Attempt number seven it is,” he sat down, pulling over his tablet when a loud ringing sound interrupted the early hours of the night, enough to make him jump.

“The fuck?!” Hongjoong blinked, looking around but he was sure he didn’t even own an old-fashioned alarm clock. As the sound wouldn’t stop, he rushed to the window, lurking out only to realize it must be coming from your place. Why would you have an alarm clock going off at nine?!

Nobody else seemed to be interrupted by it but Hongjoong and he was working best at night. As nothing happened, he figured you probably just forgot to turn it off before leaving, how reckless to leave your window open in New York!

There was clear hesitation before he climbed out of his window, taking down the stairs: “Screw this…”

Your window was wide open, the curtains softly floating outside, all lights on. Your place was just a little bigger than his but you surely put more effort in! The walls were painted in a comfortable olive green, plants matched perfectly with the white furniture and there was a large gaming setup he did not really expect but then, what did he know about you? The bed was covered with far too many pillows but there it was, the one causing so much trouble.

The alarm clock had the shape of a flower, it was cute and he wondered how somebody who liked such a style would move to this part of the city…

“What do I do?” Hongjoong looked around. He counted to one hundred. There was nobody in sight, the sound drove him insane and he did not want you to get back home just to find your expensive equipment stolen. The world was an asshole to him but he intended to be better.

He swallowed and slipped inside your home, quick steps leading to the damn noisy item to turn it off. At that moment, the bathroom door opened and you walked inside, holding likely a few bottles of soap you just switched out, your gazes met and he could see how your face turned red, just like his own, and the next second, there was a small scream and you started to throw shampoo bottles at him.

Hongjoong tried to dodge them, dropping the alarm clock in the attempt and grabbed one of your pillows to protect himself.

“Hold on! Stop throwing things at me”, he called out but now you seemed angry.

“Why would I do this?! You just broke into my apartment! A thief? Gosh, you are one of those perverts, aren’t you?” You were one burst of energy, he had to give you that. Hongjoong was about to say something when he fell backward over another pillow.

His hands lifted up into the air, praying you’d not murder him with hair conditioner: “Hold on, hold on. I live above you! Your alarm wouldn’t stop and I thought you left so I meant to close the window, lots of robberies in this neighborhood!”

While your face remained distrustful, you held your movement in the middle of the air, frowning, doubting.

“Which neighbor breaks into a place to turn off an alarm bell?” you questioned and that was a good question. Who would have done that?

“Well, I actually work at night, I need a little bit of silence but how am I supposed to do this with that noise?” he pointed at the alarm once more and this time, you considered his words.

“Fine, let’s say it is the truth. It’s still weird, you could have used the staircase and just knocked on the door like any other angry neighbor would.”

That was… a very good point.

“I should have done that,” he admitted and slowly stood again. You were looking at him, maybe considering how he barely looked like a threat, considering he was wearing pajama pants and a hoodie with a washed-out brand name.

“Alright, I will forget about it. Now get out!” you pointed towards the window and Hongjoong found himself blushing in embarrassment. he clapped his hands, bowing slightly: “I promise to knock next time.”

As you hurried over, you wondered if he had seen right and there was a small smile on your lips as he carefully slipped out. As he turned around on the fire escape, you closed the window, and your gazes met for a moment, he was giving you a tiny wave before you rolled your eyes and closed your curtains.

Hongjoong stood there, blinking for a moment until he sighed and made his way upstairs, just to be greeted with the wind likely having shut his own, forcing him to go all the way down like that and up to his apartment. Thankfully he didn’t lock the door yet when he came home earlier.

“Tch, such a reckless neighbor,” he smiled.

“Oh? Oh! This is new!” Wooyoung fished the box with flower-shaped chocolate out of the paper bag. Hongjoong made a face, trying to snatch it but the younger grinned, holding it up.

“They are also kind of expensive, do you have a crush?” It took some effort but eventually, he stole his box bag and gave it to San who was scanning them.

“I am not in love, I just kind of pissed off one of my neighbors and now I intend to make it up somehow since they live in the apartment right underneath me,” he put quite a bit of effort in leaving out as many details as possible because Wooyoung would be curious enough to just knock on your window to see himself.

“Right, you said somebody moved into the empty apartment? Took some time, you mentioned that it was already without a tenant when you moved in.”

He appreciated the cashier was offering some distraction to his best friend’s consideration of just going with Hongjoong, he did not need to say it out loud for the older to guess as much.

“Ah yeah, the landlord was surprised when he offered that one but I asked about the rooftop apartment instead. I just like the peace and quiet, nobody above me, all that,” he mumbled, rubbing a hand over his neck.

“The Lone artist above the rooftops of New York City, romantic if you asked me,” Wooyoung winked and grabbed his backpack. “Anyway, time for training, call you later San!” He waved and rushed off, the other just smiled before handing the grocery bag to Hongjoong.

“I am sure the person knows to appreciate it, this is the first time I have seen you try and … well, mention to interact with anyone outside of this store.”

Hongjoong tried his best not to swallow hard. While San only was having a casual conversation, he called out something that the artist had tried to avoid admitting: he had dodged everyone and everything ever since coming here.

The hurt was still too deep, the way the person closest to him, he smiled at and kissed every day, threw him away like trash and everyone else saying he should understand how it certainly wasn’t an easy life rather than taking his side

or just offer comfort.

He could have used a hug.

Now, it was hard to let anyone in. San and Wooyoung were nice but they just were two guys working at a grocery store that was conveniently close to his apartment, as kind as they seemed.

“I just really like living here, sure, the neighborhood’s a bit … tense at times but otherwise, the rent is really cheap and the place is great to work at, not much noise considering we are in a city of this size.”

San was looking at you, it was hard to tell if he took it or simply decided to keep his thoughts to himself but he smiled: “Well, just make sure to also enjoy the city, not only busy yourself with work. I know, artists are said to do that but yeah.”

It was as if he wanted to say more but Hongjoong already waved in tiny, grabbing his bag: “Speaking of that, I have a deadline so I better be going. Thanks again.”

Hongjoong was out the moment after, he could not hear San’s deep sigh when the bell rang once more.

He spent a good amount of time drawing a little doodle that looked like your alarm clock, looking upset and cursing about that weird guy in a little thought bubble. Next to it, Hongjoong wrote, "Sorry for having broken into your place, heard this chocolate is great." He was pleased with the result and carefully stepped outside his window, placing the little delivery right by your window, knocking against the glass, and he rushed upstairs, jumping into his own home as he waited for the noise of you opening.

His heart was beating loudly when he lurked around the corner, hearing you sigh but in a pleasant way. He did not dare to fully look, biting your lip but after a very long minute, he could hear your voice: "Just knock next time you want to say hello."

Your laugh was so soft and cute.

He grinned when the window was shut a moment later and the chocolate was gone.

Hongjoong had a talent for forgetting about time when he was working and it was less about the deadline and more so about his passion. He always loved to draw, it had been his escape from a young age and he pushed through it, no matter the concerns of everyone around him. He never wanted to be rich, just do what he loved and make enough to be able to live from it.

In a way he did, his old apartment was small but nice with a lovely view and enough space for two. Looking back, he had been a fool how he thought that his ex would enjoy it, that she liked they took their time and both added to a dream of a larger home. The series he illustrated with a few other artists for a children's magazine was doing well then, he knew it was one of the favorites in consideration of being further produced with another spin-off when it happened, Hongjoong quit.

Just like most, he also worked digitally but when he was in the early stages, he often liked to reach out for old-fashioned paper, getting a few sketches done. It was when his pencil rolled from the table that he pulled the chunky headphones from his ears to pick it up when he heard it for the first time.

It was a quiet sob, the kind where you hated yourself and just wanted to stop but your body was boycotting you, ignoring your quiet pleas for it to stop. Hongjoong had done the same for a while after coming to New York but somehow, yours hit him more than he expected. The way you faced him when he came in, the conversation after.

He should know better than assuming you were a confident person just doing your thing.

His slim figure pressed against the wall next to the open window when he listened to how you cried.

It was strange, when the heart ached, even a city like this could fall in utter silence, making one feel even more alone. He bit his lip, it was hard to listen to it and when he finally convinced himself that checking on you was more important than his fear of interrupting, the small clicking sound to pull his window fully open seemed to be enough to chase you inside like a bird fleeing from busy human steps.

All Hongjoong managed to see was the way how your lights turned off and for a moment, he wondered if you maybe prayed that he did not come down to see, that the weird guy above you just opened his window to let him some refreshing air in at the end of Summer.

He was trying to recall all of those nights after you moved in, where he kept his window open and so did you. What did he hear then? There had been that clicking sound, he could hear it any time he ended up sneaking up to the roof to smoke a cigarette. He never put much thought into it but now, you always seemed to be typing on your keyboard and you were home all the time, just like he was.

When he returned from groceries, your lights were on, and when he lurked outside in the morning, the window open.

In a movie, he probably would have thought more about it and told himself to see if it would happen again. Maybe you just had a bad day. Maybe you were just going through a hard breakup.

Just.

Maybe, if anyone had been more gentle with Hongjoong, he'd not have felt the need to move far away in a desperate attempt of moving on.

No, things would have been different if people would have acted and wasted less time guessing.

"Screw this," he cursed and walked over to the mirror. He was trying to fix his hair but it was a mess so he grabbed a hoodie and put on some summer shorts, cigarettes shoved inside of his pockets, two bottles of soda in each hand.

If you thought he was insane after this, he could live with it, really. He preferred it above having to regret wondering what happened tonight.

Hongjoong took two stairs at once until he was in front of your windows, curtains closed and while it was dark, he could see a small gleam of light, likely from your phone. He took a deep breath before knocking again.

"Hi there, it's me. Again... Uh I am Hongjoong! I know I am probably starting to get annoying, and if you decide to not answer, please just do not call the police.... I was just thinking, maybe you want to have a soda with me? I can't slepe either, I tend to work through the night.

He rambled because this was how he found comfort, he did not need to hear specific words, just little affirmation, a gesture of love. It could be something silly.

When you did not answer, he bit his lip and looked around: "Uh, I will sit down here and smoke one cigarette. If you decide not to come when it's done, I promise I go back up. I'll leave you one bottle there."

He called, placed it down carefully, and moved over to the stairs, taking a few up before sitting down, opening his own drink before lightening the cigarette.

He was exhaling only for the first time when the window opened: "You know, smoking is super unhealthy?"

Your voice did not indicate that you were crying but he could see your eyes still being red and puffy. Hongjoong looked at you like you were amazing just like that.

"You are right, I admit, I only picked the habit up recently again."

He blinked surprised when you grabbed the bottle and sat down by his side, just to take the cigarette away and inhale the smoke. He was blushing, not having expected such a bold move after you cried.

"Guess, we can make it a bad habit just for tonight then," you breathed and used the stairs to open the bottle, drinking it more like it was a party drink rather than ordinary soda, offering the cigarette back.

Hongjoong was in awe, he did not assume you would be so outgoing, although he had no doubt you were brave considering the way you two encountered face to face for the first time. The thought let him grin a little: "Sounds good to me."

His gaze wandered back over the not-that-pretty view: "The sight from the roof is pretty amazing, not sure if you maybe want to have a look another night. I can show you how to get up there."

You laughed, relaxing back: "Why am I not surprised you went up there?"

The man looked innocently: "Well, I have a lot of time to think when I am settling for a design."

The word seemed to gain your interest and you leaned in: "You work at night and that doodle was really cute. Is it something artistic you are doing for a living?" The question was fair and straightforward, leading him to shrug just a little. Most people were disappointed about the answer, somehow it did not seem to be a popular idea when it came to art.

"I work as an illustrator for children's books or that is the preferred one, I also do magazines or commercial designs for such. As for books, I do both, the traditional ones for young kids where the images carry most of the story but I also occasionally take scenes from books for older audiences, you know, mainly those right before young adults where you find little images between the chapters? Mh, I dream to make one exactly in the design I want but for now, I am stuck to work with criteria set by the publishers."

Hongjoong learned to explain what he was doing right away because when it came to illustrations, people often thought about the really expensive artworks connected to infamous titles. You did not really seem to bother with the clichés, instead, your face was so bright and excited, that he was feeling shy.

"That's so cool? I only got into reading because of those kinds of books. I mean, I get it, you are supposed to go wild with your imagination when it comes to reading but I always preferred those pages that told me what to expect but that makes sense, I'm a number person. I like facts."

Numbers, huh.

"This is the very infamous part where I offer to you that if you ever want to see something, knock on my window any time or well, I guess. You have all the right to just walk in through my window. I am awful and my phone is my alarm clock tho," he teased with a more confident grin and you returned it gladly.

"I will keep it in mind, Hongjoong." You stretched.

"It's getting late and you wasted your cigarette, I will take that as a sign to withdraw," you smiled and picked up your bottle, standing. The artist was a little disappointed but it was fair, he knew it had been far after midnight when he heard you crying but now, he was happy to see you relaxed.

"Maybe I will come back to your offer," you hummed and walked down to your window. "Oh, by the way, I am __ and don't be too disappointed, I am a software engineer. That is also why I am home all the time, the bliss of being able to dodge offices but I feel, that you know well."

As you slipped inside, you were about to close the window before lurking out again: "The chocolate was tasty, thank you."

As the window shut, Hongjoong stood there, smiling to himself.

He didn't remember ever having felt as tense in the past when handing in drafts. His old publisher had been a guy in his early 60s and even in the early stages of Hongjoong's 'career', supporting them to test their own ideas within the limits of the work. Something about getting a poor payment but at least, being able to do their thing.

There was yet a small voice of hope, one that told him this piece of paper would not be torn apart because the woman was looking at it far longer than she had at any other of his earlier designs. After hanging out with you, Hongjoong had worked nonstop, a new adrenaline rush that helped him get done with it.

Finally, he exhaled when she leaned back, placing it on the desk: "Finally, something we can work at. I approve of the cats, I expect a more detailed version at the end of the week. The dogs are too ... basic. There is just nothing memorable about them, I want two pairs of options for them. That would be all, Mister Kim."

Hongjoong could live with that! The cats were the story's main protagonists about a pair of cat siblings moving with their owners to a new city and dealing with all of the changes. Yeah, maybe it did not seem like a deep story, just another book to offer comfort to kids moving but the name on both, the writer and label were big... opening doors. What else did he have left than his career and maybe, the nagging desire to show everyone how he could do it?

I would rather be happy tho, and loved.

He only gave her a quick nod as she seemed busy again, slipping out of the office. "Why is this such a pain...." he mumbled and checked his phone. Would it be weird or too early to ask you for your number? Hongjoong hadn't given it to anyone, well except San because he got permission to use the convenience store as a secondary address, should packages fail to be delivered to his door.

Hongjoong could not deny that he was tempted to look you up online but he did not log into any of his accounts since coming to New York. If anything... he did not even tell anyone. He just sold everything, quit his job, and moved. The only person who knew was his older brother, who had been supportive unlike the rest of the family but accepted his wish to remain hidden for some time.

"Honjgoong!"

Hearing his name out in the open made him wince and he blushed when he noticed it was you who called out for him. You were smiling, waving confidently, ignoring gazes. Maybe you really just had a tough day last night. It was so hard to imagine you being somebody who cried a lot.

"Seeing you out in the wild, I am scared," he teased with a grin, walking to your side. You pointed at the heavy bags with groceries, making him realize what you wanted.

"I see how it is, somebody asking me to make the stairs my workout," he chuckled as you looked innocently. "How about, we call it quits then, for good? And in return, you can use the fire escape as often as you want, no worries. You did start to avoid doing that because of me, didn't you?"

He was surprised by the question: "Uh... how do you know about that?"

You laughed and it was sweet, he preferred seeing you happy: "Well, when I signed the contract, the owner told me the guy above likes to take them so he advised me to put something in front of the window but then, nobody ever came."

It was your way to tell him you appreciated he tried to think of your comfort, wasn't it?

"If you are sure, I rather like walking them. I got one of those window locks, I found them on a website and they are really handy. I just prefer it because the dog from the lady on the third floor, he hates me," he admitted.

It seemed to amuse you: "Not surprised, you remind me of a cat or maybe more of a fox? Mh, I love them equally, pick the one you prefer." You rushed ahead while he took the bags, rubbing a hand over his face. Ah, it was a talent of yours, wasn't it? Making him blush.

Thankfully, it wasn't too far from the building and Hongjoong got up all the bags in no time.

"Do you want to come in?" your offer showed a hint of hesitation and Hongjoong was overworrying again. Would it be strange to accept it? Was he too keen on showing how he really would like it?

"Sure, I have some time until nightfall. I have to update some of the designs, they finally accepted two of them," he made sure not to stare, not only to be polite but he already had seen your apartment when he broke in last time.

You opened the fridge and offered him a bottle of cool water, one he gladly accepted. "You said, you do like computer things... Don't mind me, I do not know a whole lot about it. I admit, when I was here last time, I thought you might be a gamer."

His Ex used to watch Twitch streams, something about finding them relaxing.

He regretted the question the instant he asked because of how your expressions slipped.

"Ah, you could say I used to enjoy gaming? It was something I did with a ... former friend." The way you reacted hinted likely it must have been a really good friend, or why else would you look so hurt about saying such a thing` Friendships ended so often, yet this one must have meant a lot to you.

Hongjoong tried not to read too much into your expressions, he did not know you well enough to have a right of doing so, likely just misreading it.

"I am sorry to hear. My friends and family weren't always so keen on my obsession with working for book illustrations either. I would not say they meant to tell me to instead work a proper job but they thought, I should just work for some big company that needs them for ads and such but that is just so soulless, you know?"

His confession was too honest but he felt comfortable with you, sharing it. Maybe it really was because you were strangers and you did not know him or his past, you wouldn't judge him based on that.

He prayed you'd not. You seemed to think about it before saying with the kindest smile: "Following your dreams is important, Hongjoong. I get that, families always mean well but sometimes, we have to figure things out on our own."

He was too nervous to offer a good answer.

"Anyway!" the quick smile was forced but he accepted it. "You said, you know how to get up on the roof? I was thinking, we could do it tonight? It sounds silly but there will be a star shower... I do not think we can see it in a city like this but we can pretend to! I shopped for some snacks, we can make it our own little event."

Hongjoong blinked, eyes big when you invited him: "Oh! Sure! I can make some time, just knock on my window!" He did not have the time based on the deadline... but he would get it done for you! Sounded like time to fight the habit of sleeping in and work during sunlight hours for a change.

"Awesome, I'm excited then!"

There was not too much else to be said it seemed, your thoughts clearly elsewhere, and Hongjoong could only guess it was because of your friend.

The illustrator spent an hour trying to pick an outfit. Tanktop, skinny jeans, some jewelry, he even picked a barret he hadn't worn in ages but it seemed the best way to deal with his hair, even his nails were repainted before he climbed up and prepared a small cozy corner, a blanket, two pillows and a few LED candles.

By the time you knocked on his window, he was almost terrified he made it look too much like a date but then, he looked at you and it seemed, you had a similar mindset. You looked stunning, and the backpack hinted you got more than a few snacks.

"You look amazing," Hongjoong complimented, he liked your style. "Sush, you sure you aren't a model and just failed to tell me?" You brought up the cliche line but it made him laugh: "Well, I tried."

As he joined you, he led you up the stairs which ended abruptly. "If you pull here, there is actually a hidden ladder," he explained and showed it to you. "Very handy, and you can simply pull it up from up there so nobody sees it."

You seemed amazed just how simple it was and carefully climbed up first.

"Oh Hongjoong, this is so pretty!" you gasped, looking at his little setup. The sun vanished just a little while ago and the candles created a nice atmosphere.

"Well, how often does one get invited to star gazing at my age? I thought it would be nice," he explained, chewing his lip as he helped you take off the backpack.

"Well, I guess it is good then I brought an entire picnic!" Indeed, you did but it wasn't just snacks, you prepared the meal obviously yourself and it made him wonder. Did anyone other than his mother ever do this for him?

"This looks delicious!" he clapped his hands together, looking over it.

"Mh, I cannot promise the taste can live up to the looks because it has been a while since I made most of these dishes," you admitted and offered him a pair of chopsticks but he shook his head: "It already smells great, and nothing can betray that."

You seemed to enjoy how expressive Hongjoong was in showing just how much he loved your cooking. His face did not manage to hide it but it was to no surprise, not only because it was tasty but because he had been living off ramyun for the past couple of months due to his cut salary.

"This is so good, I will vote for you as home cook of the year," he mumbled between trying to chew and swallowing.

"Hongjoong, are you sure you ate in the past month or two? You are eating like you were about to starve," you smiled but there was a little concern in your voice as you ate slowly.

The artist carefully placed his chopsticks aside, contemplating if it was okay to be so honest but since he already shared quite a bit with you, it seemed fair.

"To be honest, I came here a little unplanned. I got this really amazing deal or it sounded like that but the publisher CEO lady has rejected all of my designs of the past few months and they cut my salary in half every time. I get around with some savings but food wasn't on top of my priority list."

Now you did seem concerned and sighed: "You know what? She is stupid! I looked up your work and it's so cute? I mean it! I know nothing about that business branch but I like it, they are cute and as a kid, I'd have loved them but also... I used to share a place with somebody and I have a hard time getting rid of the habit of cooking more than I need. How about you come over here and then, and pick up the rest? I hate to throw away so much."

Did you look him up? Oh, that was unexpected. Hongjoong was just looking at you in awe and you seemed a little confused by it.

"You do not have to, of course!" It seemed you both were good at misreading.

He hurried to wave his hands: "Oh no! I'd love that! I just... was a little shy when you looked it up. I appreciate it. If you ever need a doodle or like ... anything drawn, let me know. I like doing it for people."

As he looked at you somehow, it felt like you two were the same. Something happened which brought you here, leaving behind a very different life but now that you sat in front of him like that, Hongjoong was so grateful and he tried to place the meaning of his heart beating just a little too enthusiastically right now.

"You know, when I was in high school, I was befriended with this really amazing guy, Hwa. He moved away with his parents before graduation but after exams, when we both knew we screwed up really badly. He would drag me up to the rooftop of our school and play silly songs from the early 2000s we danced to. I know that sounds insane but how about... we do that?"

Hongjoong didn't think about Seonghwa in a long time. He tried to find him online a few years ago but it seemed the older did not think too much about social media either.

"You want to dance?" you chuckled and checked your phone: "Well, I'd say we have another hour until the promised star shower so let's do it. You will have to provide the music tho, I forgot to close my Spotify on my computer."

Hongjoong grinned: "No worries, I got us."

It was funny but he remembered the song and there was an entire playlist dedicated to the vibe he wanted to go for. Relaxed and soft, a little silly but not embarrassing. He ensured the volume wouldn't cause too much attention but you did not seem to care at all.

When the melody and the lyrics began you just let go. Hongjoong swallowed as he watched you and for the first time in a long time, suddenly he was feeling... excited? It was different from a grand job offer or moving, it was more like that telling himself life would go on actually was real. That good things still would happen if he just kept on going.

"What are you waiting for? Don't tell me you are getting shy now," you moved closer to him, taking his hands without hesitation before starting to dance together. The shuffle was doing a good job because it went from energetic, leading to the two of you just silly jumping and vibing to something a little slower and before he knew it, his arms were curled around your figure and you rested your head against his shoulder as you moved with the music.

"This is nice," you whispered, your gaze seemed to be far off in the distance. "I forgot how nice it can be just like that." You sighed deeply without saying anything else but Hongjoong quietly agreed as his hug tightened a little. "It really is."

It was only when your phone started to ring and you withdrew that he was a little disappointed. "Okay, time for the stars!" you smiled, looking around before glancing back at the blanket. "Let's do it like we are in the countryside!"

Without hesitation, you grabbed a pillow and laid down, looking up to the sky which was just dark, the light of electricity stealing the beauty of the night. Hongjoong laid down next to you, looking up.

"Isn't this the most beautiful night sky you have ever seen?" you gasped, pointing towards nothing: "There they are! Okay, time to make your wish but remember, you can't tell anyone!"

You were so bright and outgoing, Hongjoong envied you but also quietly was thankful how you tickled this out of him again. Even before his breakup, he had been so busy struggling with work and expectations, when did he act so carefree for the last time?

"Working on the wish," he whispered and closed his eyes.

His wish for life never changed: be happy, together with people who truly loved and cherished him and he'd do the same for them.

He winced when he felt your cool hand reaching out, squeezing him and his head turned around, the beret slipped from his hair as your gazes locked. There was another moment of hesitation but you rolled onto your side, your eyes saying what words did not manage but they did not need to as you slowly closed them. Hongjoong's hand was placed on your cheek and you met in the middle into a tender kiss.

It was nothing breathtaking like in the movies, much more a kiss between students who never kissed before but yet, were so lost in the moment that they didn't worry. It only lasted for a little before your lips parted: "Guess, my wish already came true just now."

Hongjoong blushed, he wanted to say more but there was a small quacking sound. The two of you sat up immediately.

"Did you hear that?" you whispered. Hongjoong nodded: "Nobody ever comes up here and I come here almost every day since I moved in." You exchanged a few gazes before carefully standing up, following him closely, hiding behind the chimney.

Suddenly, a large figure dressed all in black jumped up like a ninja in a movie. You gasped but Hongjoong just blinked.

"Wooyoung?!"

"Wooyoung?"

"Wooyoung!"

San's figure showed up right behind his best friend, who was tugging on his jacket, clearly catching his breath. "I told you not to do this!" The younger man was just grinning: "But I had to make sure I left an impression!"

You chuckled as Hongjoong pointed to you that it was okay.

"I take it those are your friends?"

The word made Hongjoong blink. He saw these two idiots almost on a daily base now, he talked to them and while he never shared any personal details, they never treated him like other customers or a stranger.

He really did a great job on distancing, didn't he? Considering he claimed to have nobody but just made friends without realizing it.

"Something like that," Hongjoong said with a quick smile but Wooyoung already pulled him closer, pressing his cheek against his. "Sh, he is just shy! We are the best buddies!"

Hongjoong yelped and now was sparring with Wooyoung while San rubbed a hand over the back of his neck: "Sorry, we didn't mean to interrupt your date. Wooyoung has a hard time keeping his curiosity in check."

You hummed, knowing Hongjoong didn't hear it. Maybe it was for the better.

"That's okay. Actually, that's what I like about him. He's chaotic, just like me."

You clasped your hands together, cheering. "So Wooyoung! We got some food left, are you hungry?"

The younger stopped, grinning: "Always!"

Hongjoong groaned when he was woken up by loud noises coming from the staircase. He rolled onto his side, face lit up by his phone screen. It wasn't even seven but for some reason, it seemed neighbors decided to make a fuss. There was screaming, he was sure about that.

He grabbed a pair of sneakers, not caring too much about all else and decided to have a look because it seemed a little too loud considering you and an elderly woman lived the floor underneath.

The moment he recognized your voice, Hongjoong stopped all logical thinking, he took two stairs at once to face a very upstyled woman around his age. Expensive brands and overdone makeup, there was an envelope open, torn paper on the ground, and you were all in tears.

"What's going on?!" Hongjoong rushed to your side but you barely seemed to recognize him.

"How did you even find out where I live?! I won't sign this just go!" you yelled and it seemed to make the woman just more angry.

"___, stop being so stubborn! Just sign the damn rights! You are not part of the team anymore, you have no use for the brand name! Just sign it and we never have to meet again!"

By now, more neighbors had come and the least Hongjoong wanted for you was to deal with the police.

"Hey, get in. I will take care of it," he whispered to you, both of his hands on your cheeks to force you to look at him through teary eyes. It was when you finally realized you weren't alone, you swallowed hard, nodded but carefully withdrew. When the woman tried to get in, Hongjoong pushed her back.

"If you do not leave now, we will call the police! If you have any needs, use a lawyer!" he remembered how his mother watched those shows when he was little, they always just yelled about lawyers.

"Who are you? Loverboy? God, how can one person fall so low? Living in this shithole and now this?" she hissed, spitting on the ground before leaving. Hongjoong waited to ensure she'd not get back up before he slipped inside, closing your door.

You had curled up on your bed and he was a little overwhelmed but it did not matter. Hongjoong called out your name gently as he sat down on the edge of the bed, wanting to make sure you knew he was there, maybe his way of asking for permission.

When you did not move, he curled his arms around you to pull you tight like back on the rooftop, hand gently patting over your back. He wasn't going to tell you it would be okay or ask you to stop crying because he knew that sometimes, mind or body did not want to, couldn't.

All one needed sometimes, was a hug and somebody there with you.

It was hard to say just how much time passed when you turned around slowly. Hongjoong loosened the hug a little without moving back and you looked at him.

"You do not have to tell me anything," he assured in his soft voice but you shook your head slowly. "I want to... it just... it's embarrassing."

This time, it was he who shook his head: "Nothing that makes you feel sad ever is embarrassing, ___. Your feelings matter, you know?"

He was relieved to see it brought a little smile to your lips.

"You know, that also is true for you. If you are sad... it's okay. I understand it. Please don't feel like you have to hide it."

So you did look right through him after all: "You got me there... It is hard to admit weakness... I guess, for me at least. I was hurt by the people I cared for the most. Now, it is hard, like how to let them in again, how to trust?"

Your fingers gently reached out, brushing over his cheeks and he held still like if he moved, you might vanish into thin air.

"I get that," you admitted. "You see, that woman used to be my best friend since middle school. A few years ago, we started to stream together for fun. I made good money with my job, so I bought the equipment and I really was okay playing more of a background role. We worked on it together but she was the star, I didn't mind she also streamed a lot without me but then, numbers rose and there was a sponsorship she did not tell me about. One day, I got home from my office, and all the equipment was gone, together with my best friend. I was locked out of the accounts, the savings I kept at home for emergencies were stolen, and well. She spread some nasty rumors about how I was jealous and things got ugly... So I moved here. It is hard, your best friend is usually the person you rely on for comfort when something awful happens but now, there was nobody and I am stupid, the type of person that fully believes in a friendship."

It was sad, to think how money always ruined everything, love and friendship. Hongjoong watched you as you spoke, going more into the details and he made sure to listen well, to show you that he didn't only do it because you two kissed or because of you crying. He really cared about you and wanted to understand you better so he did not have to fear again, that imagine of you alone on the fire escape.

"There is nothing awkward or embarrassing about your feelings. You trusted and lost her. You tried your best to start over, leave it behind but she cannot let it be for selfish reasons," Hongjoong concluded and you finally relaxed.

"Thank you for listening.... that really helped," you whispered. "I... if you ever want to..."

Hongjoong wondered for a moment. Did he want to talk about it?

Yes, but...

"Honestly, I am not sure if I am really ready yet to talk about it but one day... I will," he promised and placed a gentle kiss on top of your head.

"How about I make you some tea?" he offered with a smile as you looked at him, you nodded and you two slowly sat up. Hongjoong was very determined to wrap you properly in a blanket burrito, ruffling your hair gently before moving over to your kitchen. He could feel your eyes on him as he moved but he did not mind it.

A few minutes later, he handed you a cup of yasmin tea and you hugged it carefully, sipping on it.

"You make a very cute blanket cat," he teased, hoping to cheer you up. "Maybe one day, you will let me draw you like that." And finally, there it was, your beautiful laugh. "I will think about it."

Hongjoong sat down by your side, he turned on the TV and you relaxed against him as you watched a random show just to get your mind off and sipped your tea. It wasn't until there was a more gentle knock on the door and the familiar voice of the elderly lady.

"I will get it," he offered and rushed over. She seemed a little concerned: "My, so much noise in the early morning. Such an unpleasant woman. I wanted to see if everything is alright but I also noted, that your door is wide open Mister Kim."

His cheeks flushed as he realized, he rushed out earlier without bringing his key or closing it. "OH! Yes, thank you so much," he bowed and it made her chuckle: "You are very welcome. Fear not, Mister Corner on the second floor left his dog outside, I have no doubt nobody will dare to make the way upstairs today."

As she wiggled away, Hongjoong turned around but you smiled. "It is okay, I am feeling better. Thank you for looking out for me. I will see you later?"

He did not want to go but it likely was a good idea to give you some space. "Count on it."

As much as he hated it, he needed to put some time into work if he intended to finish everything within the deadline but now that Hongjoong had a reason to work extra hard, he was doing it no problem and within a few hours, he finished a few sketches. Those would do for angry CEO and he could dedicate his evening toward you.

He was taking his phone from his charger when he noticed a small notification. Hongjoong turned off such with the exception of receiving one when somebody new followed him. To his surprise, the name of his latest follower was 'Hwastar' and there was only one person who would use something like that.

It took him a few minutes to remember his password, he ignored all other messages other than the one of the follow and he followed back. Within a few minutes, a message popped up. It really was Seonghwa and to Hongjoong's surprise, the man was in New York, asking to meet.

When Hongjoong knocked on your door and you did not answer, he guessed you were asleep and he decided to go for it. Seonghwa had picked a cute coffee shop, something that suited him. While he looked the same, he was yet a whole new man. Tall, well-built and stylish, the long hair suited him well but the smile was as gentle as when they saw each other for the last time. "Joong! It's been too long!"

There was a quick hug before they sat down, he was sipping on a drink. "You look good, Joongie!" Hongjoong glanced down, he barely could say he wore anything unique but then, he just really had gotten used to his style. "Not like you who seems to go to fashion week."

Seonghwa blushed a little before waving his hand: "Nah, I work for a small publisher." Hongjoong wasn't surprised to hear it. Seonghwa always loved to read and was great with all kinds of people "That's great! I am glad it worked out for you."

His old friend smiled before to the younger's surprise, he pulled out one of the children's books Hongjoong worked on as part of a team.

"I only recently moved to New York because we moved our office here. When I walked through some bookstores, I came across this one. I am glad to see you still do art... When I went home last time, my mom said you left and nobody really knew where you went."

So he did hear about it, huh?

"Breakups can be ugly, I guess I wanted to start over." Hongjoong finally said what he had not to anyone until now. It was hard to say it out loud because that way, there was no chance to deny it, to hide the truth about the why, and how it had come to this. Maybe because there was this old trust he had for Hwa that made him say it out loud now but it was impossible to hide the bitterness in his voice.

Seonghwa had an understanding, sad smile on his lips: "I know you loved her. You two already dated back then... but Hongjoong... I am also proud you are moving on, and didn't stop."

It really was difficult to let negative emotions take over when Seonghwa looked at him like that. He pulled out his business card: "I know you are currently working with a bigger name but we actually finally expanded to books that require some illustrations and my boss would love to meet you. Why don't you think about it? The offer is there, no expiration, whenever you want."

Hongjoong accepted it with surprise, looking at the cursive font he was sure was inspired by his friend's handwriting.

How did things finally fall in line? Was it because he was ready to let them?

Hongjoong looked up and smiled: "I will definitely call."

When he came back, it had gotten dark. As Hongjoong took the fire escape up, your window was wide open and you sat on the stairs, the wind playing with your hair and you seemed lost in thoughts but the moment you saw him, the way you smiled, he knew.

His heart finally exhaled, it held its breath for so long, scared of what would happen if it let go of all that was and no longer would be.

Now it knew it was okay. Breathing would hurt for a little while but eventually, the beat would fall back in line as it should. Painful memories remained but it would keep beating.

The wisdom wasn't wrong, life went on.

Hongjoong smiled back as you made space for him and he got comfortable, his gaze wandering over the cityscape of New York or the bit you managed to get from here.

"it really is ugly, isn't it? I mean, all we get to see are the lower side of those giant ass buildings;" you joked and he laughed, shaking his head: "No, we do not but we have the rooftop. Not that I mind this."

He closed his eyes: "It really is a great escape, I would say, we need those stairs everywhere in the world."

You hummed: "I agree. Just that we need little stickers on the windows, one that tells us that if the alarm won't go off and the windows open, just throw a shoe or something."

Hongjoong smiled innocently at you: "But how do I get my shoe back then?"

You grinned: "Well, by knocking, of course. Then, I have an excuse to invite you in."

You did not need an excuse, he gladly would come and visit you. As you looked at each other, a certain silence spread, and Hongjoong played with one of his bracelets.

"I got my heart broken very badly," he admitted. "I guess, I was blind? Maybe I just was so in a habit of having it that way, that I did not think it could change? It hurt a lot and I ran like a coward but now, maybe this is just how I am. Sometimes, I do stupid things that turn out to be good but I am also blind like needing forever to realize how I made friends just by being myself or that I can feel again."

As he looked at you, turning around, you suddenly hugged him tightly. "It is okay, you do not have to tell me everything, ever or just take your time. I will be here, whenever you are ready," you whispered and Hongjoong was surprised.

Argh, he hated how tears started to dwell up at the corners of his eyes. This was all he wanted for so long but now, here you were and you were so much more than comfort, the promise of a future where his heart was beating not only to live but love. Again.

"I really like you," he admitted, voice soft and husky. "I like you too," you repeated and for a moment, you just held each other.

Hongjoong looked at you before he swallowed: "I'd like to see where it goes... but I might... need a bit of time before I am ready to go all ..."

You placed an index finger on his lips and smiled: "It's okay. We have all the time in the world. Summer is not over yet, many nights on the rooftops. Then, when autumn comes, we go chase leaves in Central Park, and in Winter, we can wear big fluffy coats and share a scarf. Then Spring, we plant flowers on the rooftop, and when Summer comes again. We will be here, together. Close or as friends, I will be here, count on it."

You really were so dreamy, it made sense now why your room looked the way it did.

And he loved how you were bold and silly and this.

"I cannot promise not to be spontaneous, and I might would like us to be more than friends," he admitted and you smirked: "I love random and wild."

You squeezed his hand and Hongjoong was looking forward to all seasons. In this lonely city full of people but now he had friends, old and new but most of all, you.

As you leaned in to kiss him, your alarm was going off. Hongjoong groaned but you tugged on his jacket.

"Sh, you can throw shampoo at it later," you promised and Hongjoong laughed.

"This alarm, it drives me insane," he whispered, your lips so close.

"So do you."

In the best way possible.

#hongjoong x reader #hongjoong x you #hongjoong oneshot #ateez fic #ateez x reader #ateez oneshot #ateez au #ateez writing #kim hongjoong x reader #hj tag #hongjoong comfort #reis writes

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star-suh · 1 year

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Ok sweet. So the request is top hongjoong x bottom m reader

Plot is pretty much reader is watching the performance for bouncy and he gets turned on by his bf and the choreo and lyrics and all and so at the end of the show the reader drags hongjoong into a dressing room and then some smut lol. I can’t think of any details besides hongjoong just teasing the reader but that’s all the details I can think of rn

MAKE IT BOUNCY!

Kim Hongjoong x Male Reader

an: i'm thinking the way i used the lyrics is kinda cringey 😭 it's kinda short but i hope you like it and thanks for requesting it :)

cw: you and hongjoong are bfs, dirty talk, implied multiple rounds, use of a sex toy, mirror sex, mention of stomach bulge, kinda fluffy at the end, a bit of other members at the end.

—

you were the special mc of today's show and you were happy because your boyfriend hongjoong and his group, ateez, were promoting the title track of their new album and you were in the waiting room watching their performance. he knows that you're a horny freak and decided to tease you with his facial expressions, the choreo especially the hip thrusts and everytime he sings the lyrics "slow it down make it bouncy" and "if you wanna know how, i can show you right now" he glares and winks at you. some minutes has passed and it's the end of the show, everyone was waving, bowing and saying goodbye, you were feeling so needy so grab hongjoong's hand and dragged him to the nearest dressing room. you both entering, you locked the door and started kissing him so desperately "woah woah hold on baby, why are you acting so needy huh?", "you know damn well why" you replied. hongjoong laughed and introduce his thumb into your mouth and you started sucking it. "i certainly don't know" he smiles, "the only thing i do know is that you're a kinky naughty boy" he slapped your cheek softly "so what do you want?" he asked you pulling out his thumb from your mouth and licking it "i want you, i need you so bad, you're the only one who can satisfy me… please", "well ok, since you wanna know how… i'm gonna show you right now"

"fuck yeah just like that" hoongjoong told you, you were riding him in a reverse cowgirl position, "remember y/n slow it down and make it bouncy" he spanks you "you know how much i love to see your hole swallowing my whole cock, it's such a naughty and delicious view" you moaned feeling how his cock stretch out your ass "you cock is so fat joong, i feel so full" when you lifted your ass he thrusted hard making you moan so loud "fuck yeah it's definitely bouncy" he joked… "you want to see that view too right y/n" he asked you, "no that would be so embarrasing", "shhh i know you will like it" he grabs you in a full nelson position in front of a mirror and started thrusting again "look at that hungry hole getting fed y/n… don't you like it?" you were closing your eyes but decided to watch anyways, you feel embarrassed and became a blushing mess watching how his cock enters your gaping hole coated with lub and body fluids "hngh… dirty boy you like watching yourself get fucked huh? your clenching so hard i feel like you gonna cut my dick…. fuck!" you didn't know what to answer, you just want to keep feeling his hard cock bulging your tummy and his warm cum inside you. minutes has passed, the whole room smells like sex, hongjoong has fucked you dumb in every possible position and in all posible places of the dressing room "take the last one y/n" he said thrusting hard while jerking you off you both came at the same time. "fucking hell you milk me dry y/n" he pulls out and inserted a plug in your puffy destroyed hole "i don't want any of that dripping around here, besides it can work as a lub when we are later at home" he kisses your forehead and cheek "hold on let me clean that for you" you grabbed his cock and started licking all the cum "you look so pretty when you sucking cock y/n" he said caressing your cheek "shut up" you replied to him embarrassed "let's get dressed and let's go home, your members must be worried about where you were" you told him, "sure let me help you with your clothes" hongjoong replied…

"there they are" said yunho, "we were looking for both you guys but we couldn't find any of you". "yeah haha" you said embarrassed "we were in the cafeteria" "i was trying to teach him the choreo" hongjoong said. "anyways let's go i'm tired" said jongho, you all started to walk towards the van except two members, wooyoung and san, the first one talking in the ear of the latter "i know those horny bastards were fucking, just look at the way y/n is walking it's like he has something in his ass" san laughed "yeah true i didn't realized it until you said it", "teaching him the choreo yeah sure" say wooyoung laughing along with san…

#ateez x male reader #kpop x male reader #smut #male reader #hongjoong x male reader #kim hongjoong x male reader #hongjoong smut #kpop x male reader smut #kpop smut #male reader smut

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setsugekka · 1 year

Text

『paradise lost』 ; 05

❝ pull the trigger ❞

↳ during one lazy day around the loft, hongjoong brings something new and exciting to the table: a very special guest star, trusted and provided with ease.

the problem? well, you don’t think there is one—until you meet the man himself, hongjoong’s best friend since college and trouble personified—jung wooyoung.

⎯ ୨previous୧ ⎯ ○ ⎯ ୨series mlist୧ ⎯ ○ ⎯ ୨next୧ ⎯

『 pairing 』 : jung wooyoung x fem!reader, kim hongjoong x fem!reader x jung wooyoung

『 genre 』 : romance, explicit sexual content.

『 rating 』 : mature

『 word count 』 : 14.6k

『 warnings 』 : sexually explicit content: m/f/m threesome!! men touching and kissing too, penetrative sex (protected & not), oral sex (m+f), wooyoung is a huge tease (w/ a huge cock), dirty talking and heavy flirting, cat & mouse games, mc wants wooyoung and he won’t let her have him.

If you were honest — things with Hongjoong had become comfortably routine.

A few months now after the fated trip to Japan, the two of you had settled into what could only be described by any onlooker as delightfully domestic. Unsure of how exactly it had come about, more and more of your belongings had started finding their ways into Hongjoong's loft without ever really finding their way back out of it. Nights or weekends spent at your best friends place quickly found to be turning into weeks at a time — neither of you acknowledged it with any verbal telling.

You acknowledged it by never taking your things home. Hongjoong acknowledged it by bringing more dressers and clothing racks for your items.

Legally, you didn't live there. Figuratively might be a different story, however.

The nights spent apart became fewer and further between, along with the ones spent without Hongjoong between your knees.

Even still, with the man comfortably lodged between your legs even now — it's nothing sexual: carefully balancing a plate of cheese and crackers on your stomach as he picks at it, completely spaced out aside from his attention on the film before you, looking down at him calms you — a sense of serenity you've realized that you never had found in another person. Not really. Not like this.

Whatever this was.

Lazily bringing your hand down and atop his head, fingernails grazing over his scalp and the shortened hair beneath — now adorning similarly cut hair from Japan but of a dark blue color — it pulls his attention, albeit briefly, and you can tell from the gleam in his eye precisely why it does.

Hongjoong looks up at you from over the plate, grinning just before stuffing another slice of cheese into his mouth, “Are you trying to start something?”

You weren't really. You weren't against it, but it wasn't necessarily the intention, even though you knew that it would be taken as such by him.

Shifting along the couch and propping your shoulders up on the ends of the red piece of furniture, Hongjoong reaches out in an attempt to not spill crackers all over his new, white, faux fur rug as you suddenly shift in place beneath the both of them. Meeting eyes, he squints — as if trying to read your mind from the place he remains, nestled between your legs.

“Boring you already?” he says, placing the plate onto the table just beside you and bringing his hands up and underneath your sweatshirt. The feeling of his soft hands never failing to send chills up your spine, if it weren't an asinine question to begin with then this action would have certainly served as a reminder.

“Of course not, what?” you answer back quickly, trying to play it cool as if not completely melting beneath his rather benign touch. “Because I'm not jumping you every second of the day?” you add, breath hitching at the very particular press of a finger tip into the underside of one of your breasts — his eyes still glued to your face to gauge your response.

He takes pause before replying again, watching the way that your body betrays you in a way. You know that he's enjoying the foreplay, even before it's really foreplay; the way your skin raises under his touch and breath shifts, eyes fluttering and pulling away from his strong gaze — you say that you don't want him, and that may have been true in the moment, but you and him both know that that is subject to change at a moment’s notice, and he holds all of the power in doing so.

And thank fuck for that, you often think to yourself.

Hongjoong pushes your sweatshirt up and off of your tummy — only exposing a bit of the skin around your belly button and pulls himself up the length of your legs just enough to grant himself the ability to press his lips to the skin there — light kisses peppering your abdomen and you hate the way that he has you liquefying under his touch each and every time. Well, you don't hate it, but you wish you could at least make it a little less obvious how easy it was sometimes.

Soft hands reaching back down and around your waist, snaking ever so slightly up your back, he stills and looks up at you from beneath long eyelashes — lips still delicately attached to your skin, as if speaking directly to it there.

“What's something new you'd like to do?”

The question is a little confusing in the moment because there isn't much that the two of you haven't done by now. A handful of items still on the bucket list, sure, but your sex life together was still new and budding and well within the throes of the honeymoon period — frankly, you found it a little bizarre for him to be asking how to spice it up already. That is, until:

“Something you desire,” he adds, pressing lips firmer to your skin again and all the while his eyes remaining locked on yours. “Someone else? A guest?”

The way it drops from Hongjoong's lips is sinful and sounds almost as if it had been something he had rehearsed before. The sexiest way to ask about adding another person into the bedroom without entirely putting the other off; obviously, an impossible task to have 100% success with, but the man was nothing if not crafty...if not sexy.

He certainly managed it.

You swallow hard in response to the question and you watch the way he studies your face intently, trying to pick up on any and all nuance to the way that you feel as a result before your verbal response. A wise choice, given the incredible lack of actual, thorough communication between the two of you.

Sometimes you worry how much worse the both of you would be if not for the innate ability to simply understand.

Suppose that you don't respond fast enough, Hongjoong quickly scrambling to pick himself up and off of you and in a shaky haze of insecurity that you're not sure that you have ever really seen present on him before, an attempt to explain away what it was that he had just presented to you.

But you don't need him to explain it away, you need him to explain it more.

“Joong,” you finally interrupt his onslaught of cautious wavering and constant apologizing. Your voice steady and calm in such a way that you can tell it catches him off guard. “It's okay.”

“I just figured since you're having sex with other people still—“

The singular use of the word “you” not lost on you in the moment, and absolutely a slip of the tongue on Hongjoong's part. You find it sort of charming the way that his tough, calculated exterior continues to fall by the wayside the longer the both of you remain involved with one another on...whatever level that it is that you're involved in.

“Yeah, and it is fine,” you reply, grabbing one of his flailing arms and pulling him back down and against you on the couch, “Just...surprised. It's not every day the guy I'm having sex with asks me if I want to have sex with someone else with him.”

You pause for a moment, realizing that he had never actually stated the terms and conditions of such a thing, and turning your head towards him — now face to face with you and wedged between you and the back of the couch, he quickly settles back into his mischievous self, smirking at you while he watches the wheels turn in your head at the possible implications.

“...With you, right?” you add, unsure in tone. Hongjoong continues watching you with one corner of his mouth starkly upturned. Devilish.

“Well,” he starts with a sigh, flinging his free arm over your chest and twirling free strands of your hair around his fingers. “History tells me that you don't need my help fucking other people without me so not sure why you'd need me for that, darling.”

In moments like these, you find it completely indiscernible just how much your romp with Yunho truly stuck with Hongjoong. Through all of the playful jabs and coy remarks, you can only assume that in these moments where he feels as though he has no choice but to comment on it, that it comes deep from a place that you find entirely dark and unfamiliar: a place of genuine, unforeseen, and wickedly unsettled hurt.

Like a pot reaching a boiling over point, trying to release the pressure of holding it in without really losing control. Kim Hongjoong was calm, collected, and quite possibly entirely damaged in his own right.

But aren't we all.

Elbowing him in response, he leans in towards you again, pressing a few light kisses to your jaw — the only place in which he can reach in the moment and at the angle at which he lie, fingers still wrapping in your hair, and it's so easy to melt into him each and every time.

“Yes, with me,” he makes clear finally, his breath hot against the skin of your face, and you're unsure if this moment is being treated as foreplay — the way he's touching and talking to you — the erection against your thigh saying one thing, but if you're honest, Hongjoong is just about insatiable in that aspect, not necessarily indicative of anything in particular except for being in your presence and having the ability to have his hands on you. “If you'd like, we don't have to.”

And you can tell from his voice that he means it. That Hongjoong is bringing this up because he thinks that it might actually be genuinely fun — not even particularly for him, but more so for you. A man that exudes comfort and safety, you know that you have the ability to say 'no' to this without there being an adverse reaction, that Hongjoong will carry on as though nothing ever happened.

You wonder if deep down, the part of him that finds itself chronically hurt by your intimacy with Yunho actually hopes for your decline of the offer: a part of him but a slave to a man too proud to succumb to it.

Unfortunately, you're not yet strong enough not to take the bait, as it were.

You bring a hand back up and into his hair again, nails digging into his scalp with just the right intensity that you know the sensation goes straight to his dick — you figure that he's already using the conversation as foreplay so what's playing along a little bit?

“How do we go about finding someone for this little endeavor? I've done threesomes before but, I was the extra not the coup—“

You pause before finishing the word, realizing exactly what it was that you were about to say. For all intents and purposes, you know that the verbiage is correct, and doesn't necessarily imply anything particularly deep.

But it's still a lot in the moment. “You know, I was the guest.”

If Hongjoong notices then he ignores it, which you're thankful for as he carries on in spite of it. “You've done a threesome before? Wow...look at you!” before playfully slapping your arm in shock.

“Yes, I had a sex life before you, Joong, imagine that.”

“Hardly,” he devilishly responds, “and you likely won't have much of one after me.”

You hate that that feels sort of correct thus far.

Hongjoong presses another few kisses to your jaw before grinding what is now quite the prominent hardness of his dick against your leg, as if insinuating that he's more than ready for this particular bit of the conversation to be over — driven home by his free hand slinking down the length of your body and deft fingers gently beginning to play with the button at the front of your jeans.

“I actually know a guy who might be a good fit,” he says against your skin, voice lowered and quite evidently laden with desire for you. “He's kind of annoying, though.”

You chuckle at the end of his sentence, pulling back slightly to look down at him before he allows himself to truly get carried away in the moment. “Why would you write a recommendation for someone that you also refer to as annoying?” you ask.

You feel Hongjoong finally pry the button on your pants loose — it's time to hurry the end of this conversation along, for both of your sake.

“He's just particular, a little eccentric,” Hongjoong states, the feeling of his burning fingertips grazing against the skin of your stomach and slowly disappearing into the band of your underpants. “He would be a good fit, though. I've known him for years, he's done this before, too.”

You're barely listening at this point, hardly caring about anything having to do with Hongjoong's weird friend with the way that his hand effortlessly glides down and against your skin, breath heavy and humid on your jaw and neck.

“You'll have to court him.”

Eyes snapping open, it's not the idea of courting a man that has you appalled or anything, you're more than willing to do that, but you wonder why it is that Hongjoong thinks a guy like this would be a good addition to the current sexual arrangement, aside from just having had experience in the matter.

But when his middle finger sinks down just a bit further, the attention to detail washes away just as quickly as it had come to you.

In a few gentle circles of his fingertip, Hongjoong's lips attach to your neck, and you're absolutely no longer interested in participating in the conversation any further tonight, but you figure it's only polite to wrap it up properly.

“Fine,” you whisper, voice catching in your throat ever so slightly. “What's his name?”

“Jung Wooyoung.”

Calling the whole thing bizarre may have been an understatement.

Smoothing your palms over the sides of your long, fitted black dress — you find it a bit cute how dressed you are, all things considered: it was a date in which you're meant to be seducing someone, and yet you opt for a garment in which little skin is shown. A deep inhale while looking at your reflection in the mirror — your mild discomfort is present in your choice of dress. Uncertainty. Wanting to take a step forward but not feeling bold nor confident enough with it all to really go all out, or tits out, for that matter.

And adding to it all; stepping out of the large bathroom of Hongjoong's loft dressed and ready to go on a date with another man — a date that he set up for you.

But he was not accompanying you, you were on your own tonight. Straight into the lion's den, as it were.

Canvases and oil paints sprawled all across the hard floor of your now seemingly shared place, the juxtaposition of how the both of you were intending to spend your nights makes you chuckle under your breath: Hongjoong looking a bit like someone’s kid son playing arts and crafts while the adults go out to play. Looking up, his eyes wash over your figure and it brings a heated flush to your cheeks, once again nervously palming over your dress to smooth out wrinkles that were never there to begin with.

“Wow,” he exclaims, muffled and with a paint brush between his teeth before pulling it out to continue his thought. “You look amazing.”

“Are you sure you shouldn't come?” you ask again. It's only the third time since he had told you about the date two days ago.

But he shakes his head, “Nah, it's better like this. It'll feel like I'm chaperoning or something. You guys don't need me there.”

An interesting choice of words. You find the entire thing a little incomprehensible, but intriguing nonetheless.

Hongjoong taps the front of his phone to illuminate it, checking the time. “You should go, don't wanna be late.”

“He doesn't like it?” you reply in a sort of mocking tone, but he only looks at you gently and with a nod.

“Your friend sounds like he might be more trouble than he's worth,” you sigh, grabbing your purse and heels and heading towards the front door. “I cannot for the life of me imagine why you insist on this guy.”

“I've known Wooyoung for a long time,” Hongjoong says confidently, dabbing blue paint onto a glass palette as you slip your shoes onto your feet. “He's definitely trouble but it's worth it.”

The sentence feels more telling than perhaps was meant. Have they...done this sort of thing together before? Perhaps a conversation for another night if you're not to be late.

“I trust him,” Hongjoong says suddenly and after you think the topic of conversation has ended. “Yes, he's annoying and there will absolutely be moments tonight where you think it's not worth it but I wouldn't suggest him if I didn't think it was the best for us.”

Us.

Hand pushing open the large doors to the apartment, you begin to exit before one thought suddenly comes to mind. You consider letting it go, not bringing it up at all...but maybe you should.

After all, in situations like this, full transparency is key.

“Should I, uh—“ you begin nervously, Hongjoong's head snapping up from what he had been doing after catching it in your tone, but his eyes on you only causing your resolve to waver more. “Should I...might I...not be coming back here tonight?”

Incredibly awkward, asking the man that you're sleeping with primarily if you should be prepared to spend the night with the other man he has set you up on a date with tonight.

But Hongjoong only laughs, gently shaking his head. “No, don't worry about that. He's not going to fuck you tonight, I'll see you later.”

And for whatever reason, you find that all the more bizarre than the alternative.

In the car ride over, your mind races a million miles a minute. Thoughts of anticipation and nervousness and even guilt, much to your surprise. It's not as if you couldn't, or shouldn't be seeing another man — in fact, you have seen other men since the beginning of your involvement with your best friend, but something about this particular night, this particular scenario, brings twists and turns to your stomach that you hadn't yet experienced. Perhaps it was Hongjoong's involvement in the entire thing: the full disclosure and complete facilitation in the night’s events that brought a bit of a chilled sweat to your neck.

Perhaps it was the fact that he was seemingly completely unmoved, too.

Not that there would ever be a scenario in which you belonged to Hongjoong, if for all intents and purposes the idea of a relationship were to echo the concept, then him sending you off on a date with another man — a man you're intended to court, then one could only assume that perhaps Hongjoong had no interest in you belonging to him at all.

Maybe you were getting the read wrong all of this time. Maybe what the both of you had really was just...a friendship.

Or maybe his sending you off and facilitating the meeting was his idea of flexing a sort of control over the situation — something he lacked with your rendezvous with Yunho. A situation completely out of his hands, no say in the matter any which way.

Maybe he was doing what he felt like he had to in order to keep you around: an assumption that perhaps you will never be fully content in having only him.

And when the car stops in front of the lavish restaurant, you think for a moment that so does the beat of your heart, if only for a split second. Driver exiting the vehicle and opening the back door for you, you slowly climb out and thank him for his time before coyly stepping up and towards the large glass doors. A swanky, high-rise sort of establishment where only the most elite spend time — you feel entirely out of place. You don't look it, and you're thankful for that, but you certainly do feel it, and on the elevator ride to the very top floor — thirty-two — when the metal casing of your demise dings and the doors slide open, you're met with casual, jazz music and low lights from the ceiling.

The setting is certainly apt, you think to yourself, holding your head higher in an attempt to feign confidence, heels clicking on the freshly waxed black tile flooring towards the hostess.

“Hello, I'm here to meet someone?”

The woman smiles brightly towards you, “Sure, their name?”

“She's with me,” a voice calls out from behind the woman, and it feels like it happens in slow motion, the entire scene before you.

Black marble bar only a few feet behind the woman at the desk, you suppose the man now turning and heading toward you had been waiting and listening in on the exchange. You watch him as he faces you — bleached blonde hair slicked back and off of his forehead, save for a strand that you think he might have placed there on purpose for effect, sides shaved to perfection as if he sees his barber everyday — it reminds you of Yunho but in the opposite way, where Yunho cared far less about his appearance in such a meticulous way, it became quite evident to you immediately upon laying eyes on the man that he was quite the opposite, indeed.

Perfectly pressed black slacks, black dress shoes that looked as if they had never even set foot outdoors once, and the fitted, silky, navy blue button down that you were now quite sure had buttons ignored further down the sternum of his chest — you didn't even know him, but you found it difficult to pry your eyes away from the exact place that you were sure he wanted them to land.

All adorned with a black blazer, not a piece of fuzz nor a hair out of place on it, and two beautifully placed freckles on his face — one just under his eye, and the other humorously and distractedly placed just on his bottom lip.

He was good looking. Incredibly so. You silently swore to Hongjoong for being kind of right about this whole thing after all.

“Ah, of course, are you ready to be seated then?” the hostess asks him, and he glances to you for approval. You nod hurriedly, and he grins in response to your eagerness. It's sort of sly already and you're surprised that you not only catch it, but that he sends it out.

The two of you have only met seconds ago...although, suppose the both of you know why it is that you're meeting here tonight.

After having been seated, Wooyoung orders drinks for the table, along with a couple of appetizers for you to pick at over conversation, and once they arrive, the two of you finally settle in.

It feels like a job interview, you think to yourself. Except for some reason, the potential employee is the one conducting the whole thing.

The truth is that Jung Wooyoung radiates the type of slick, cool, collected energy that often makes people nervous without trying. A man wildly confident and with every reason to be, you find him intriguing and sexy already and he's barely even done anything.

You also find him to be a little terrifying.

Wooyoung sits back in his chair, watching you intently as you do the same towards him, only with much stiffer body language. He chuckles under his breath suddenly and with a grin — leaning forward and pressing an elbow into the table — a sort of rude gesture for such an expensive restaurant, but nothing about the man gives off an air that he were ever to be the one to give a damn about what the strangers around him were thinking of him.

“Are you nervous?” he finally asks, chin placed into his palm as he eyes you.

“Umm, a little bit, yeah, I guess so.”

“Do I make you nervous?” he amends his question, this time with one of the corners of his mouth curling upwards.

“I think the whole situation makes me a little nervous.”

That's the truth.

“Because of Joong?” he asks suddenly, and you quickly respond with a “no.”

You're actually not entirely sure if that one's the truth.

You quickly realize over dinner that the problem with Wooyoung is that he is painfully sexy. Your eyes continuously trailing down the opening of his button down, even when you're trying not to — but it's something about his allure that you find captivating in ways that you find unfamiliar and a little bit dangerous. A man that is obviously rich, just like so many of the other men you find yourself involved with — it's not difficult to stumble into the bedrooms of rich men. Hongjoong has money, Yunho has money, but it's something about the way that Wooyoung in particular carries himself that comes off as particularly untouchable — high class and expensive, as if directly pulled out of a Saks Fifth Avenue, or an episode of Sex and the City, it's the type of man that you would never typically even go for — partially because you cannot fathom what you would ever have in common with a guy like this.

Suppose that doesn't matter now, though.

The allure of the self-important, rich guy that you never saw before; you hated the way you desired him based off of next to nothing. Yes, he was funny, and yes, he was wickedly charming — but men like that were everywhere.

It was something particular to him.

You recalled in that moment, Hongjoong insisting that Wooyoung would make it worth it. You hadn't put much thought into what it was that he meant by that exactly until now.

And now, you really want to know.

After the both of you finish eating, Wooyoung leads you to the bar to sit next to one another and continue the consultation process, as it were. You found it impossible not to notice the way so many of the women — and even some of the men — stopped to look at him anywhere he went.

How could one man be this desirable? You wished you could have been the outlier.

Sitting down, the man next to you wastes no time splaying a palm on your thigh. It's gentle and without intent — well, not outwardly sexual intent. There's certainly intent, made evident by the way his eyes narrow sinfully.

“What do you want?” he says, leaning towards you as he whispers it into your ear as to be heard over the music.

The question, paired with the delivery, sends a chill down your spine. You wish you were stronger, and having never been one for one night stands, you wish you were still wanting to remain as such.

But you wanted him, the question only serving as a fast track for your mind to imagine him bending you over the sink in the single use bathroom.

And it's as if he can see into it, fingers ever so gently digging into the flesh of your thigh at the very same time, only to quickly remove himself from you entirely and call out towards the bartender.

This was humiliating. Surely Hongjoong did not know what he was doing...right?

You had to change the trajectory of the night before things got wildly out of control, and fast.

Clearing your throat, you straightened yourself up on the seat as the man next to you finishes ordering another round. Hands once again nervously smoothing over your dress in the spot that Wooyoung had just been in an attempt to wipe away the lingering feeling of him digging into your flesh — even through cloth.

“So,” you begin your re-calibration, “what do you do?”

Wooyoung smiles at the question, leaning back a bit and against his palm once again. “Hongjoong didn't tell you anything about me?”

You figure it might not be in either of your best interest to inform the man that he had been described as “weird” or “annoying,” so you opt out of both. “No, not really. Just said you would be a good—“

You pause, unsure of what the fuck you're saying, exactly.

Wooyoung's eyebrows raise in surprise, head cocking to the side only a bit as if what it was that you had said truly piqued his interest all of a sudden. Of course it did. It was the first time either of you had really addressed the elephant in the room in any way, shape, or form.

Even by accident.

The bartender comes back around to set each drink on the bar before scurrying off to the other side to tend to more patrons — you thank him, Wooyoung still eyeing you much too intently to pry himself away long enough to do the thanking himself.

“A good fit?” he finishes, reaching down and towards his drink and slowly bringing it up to smiling lips, but not before dropping the bombshell of the night that, while certainly and completely unprepared for, you're not sure there ever would have been a time where you were capable of handling it any better.

Rim of the martini glass ever so delicately pressed to his bottom lip — just against the very same birthmark that you can't help but glue eyes to.

“We'll have to test that out then, won't we?”

Thankful that you hadn't yet taken a sip of your drink, the way in which Wooyoung just casually remarks about the physical, literal fit of things makes you sputter — dizzying at the implications of the words. Trying to play it cool, you fake laugh at the words, despite not finding anything about what he had said humorous in the slightest.

You actually found him to be a bit of a terrorist. Did he just imply...the size of his dick to you?

And tonally, you know it to be the case. The ever so slight twist of his lips as he says it and the way he chooses not to make eye contact — as if pretending to not know exactly what it is that he's doing. But he does know, and he knows that you know, as well.

Jung Wooyoung is evil. Pure evil.

And you remember Hongjoong insisting that you weren't going to get fucked tonight, at least not by this man, but all of the signs certainly are pointing to quite the opposite.

But along your best friend's insistence, the boundaries of such an endeavor never really did get discussed. This is meant to be a three party scenario...you're not sure if you're even “allowed” to fuck Wooyoung tonight.

Once again, those blurred dating boundaries find themselves ever present in every minute aspect of your involvement together.

You could text him. You could also just exercise your agency as a single woman and do whatever it is that you wish to do.

Which, in this moment, is get turned inside out by the blonde sitting next to you.

“Let's get you home, shall we?” Wooyoung says as you both finish drinks at just about the same time. “Can I drive you?”

You know you're supposed to be going back to Hongjoong's tonight, if for no other reason than all of your belongings having found their way into a new home, but you're not necessarily thinking with a clear head, either. You agree, stepping out of the restaurant and into the elevator with Wooyoung. You think about how nice it would be if he began touching you then and there — hand snaking up the inside of your thigh, and ever so curious about just how soft those lips feel comparatively to how they look.

But he never does. Standing still and on the other side of the metal box from you, hands in pocket and chewing on a toothpick from the corner of his mouth.

Getting into his car — something new and expensive and released this year of no surprise to you, he presses on the ignition and turns the heated seats on for you as you both buckle up and tells you to plug your address into the navigation system in the center console.

The anticipation bringing a shake to your hand that you hope he doesn't notice. You're neither frightened nor put off, rather feeling reminiscent to your younger and less experienced years — calling back to an earlier time when being with men made you nervous, but now replaced with desire, and want, a visceral want as an adult woman who seeks sex.

The only other time you remember feeling this way is with Hongjoong. The first time. You feel a little guilty at how easily it's been replicated over a couple of drinks and a $125 plate.

And the car ride to your apartment being silent does you no favors, your imagination running wild with all of the ways in which you wish for Wooyoung to have you. From the restaurant bathroom, to the elevator, to the stairwell in your apartment, to your bedroom now — it takes everything you have within you to clear your mind of the thoughts well enough to gather yourself and thank him for dinner and the ride — both of which he insists are no big deal at all, that the pleasure is his, and you wish for nothing more than to really show him exactly what that could mean.

But you know that the both of you are well aware of what this is. You were with Hongjoong when he originally hit Wooyoung up and explained the situation to him. He knows. He knows that he is effectively someone that you are going to have sex with, should it suit him, and you can't imagine why it wouldn't. The both of you being good looking, and obviously into it with the way that he had been flirting so strongly back at the bar. You knew that he knew what he was doing, and if he were even half as perceptive as you were, then he certainly knew that you were dying for it right about now.

“Want to come up for another drink?” you finally ask, grabbing your purse and lazily pressing your head to the headrest of the leather seats, eyes slightly hooded and most definitely giving the 'fuck me' eyes.

He knows. He definitely knows.

And Wooyoung grins wickedly at the proposal. You can see the way his tongue presses to the inside of his cheek as if mulling over the opportunity in his head — running through the pros and cons of partaking in such a dastardly deed.

You still aren't sure of the dubious circumstances of having sex with this man prior to the previously discussed threesome. Whether this was grey area. According to Hongjoong, Wooyoung is well-versed, so surely he knows the “rules” of what is and isn't okay in any such situation.

“No, thank you, have a good night.”

It comes as such a shock that for a moment you think he might be joking. Tongue to cheek still, and almost certainly attempting to subdue a grin in response, now you really are starting to understand what Hongjoong meant when he said this man was annoying.

Of course he wants to, and of course he knows you want to. And yet, he's not going to.

“Where's the fun in that?” he adds, staring forward and out of the windshield before quickly glancing to the side and towards you with a look that absolutely proves the hypothesis.

He's playing the game, you'll have to play along if you really want it.

It's particularly humiliating you find — dialing the taxi to take you to Hongjoong's when you could have just had Wooyoung drop you there to begin with had you not taken it upon yourself to go rogue, in ways.

You're used to playing chess with Hongjoong, but not like this. A game of chess in which there are moments where you feel as though you have the upper hand, and Hongjoong inadvertently leaves too much of himself bare and exposed on the table — you find that everything about this distinct game feels resoundingly out of your own. A game that you've neither played before nor read the rules on, Wooyoung wraps you around his finger before you ever even really know it and then allows you to hang yourself for his viewing pleasure, when thought through the events of the night in such a way, you find that it almost makes you angry. Who is he? Who is he to set you up to fail in such a tragic display. Setting you up only to watch you fail in the end, all because it gets him off. You consider for a moment that perhaps Hongjoong was wrong about Wooyoung after all, that he wasn't the right fit. That it wasn't worth it.

No one likes getting dicked around, after all.

But it's the lingering feeling of blunt fingers pressed into the skin of your thigh again, the heat of his breath next to your ear whispering lowly in an effort to get you to tell him what it is that you want...however it is that he may have meant it in the moment, that softens your resolve once again and has you thinking ‘what if?’

Hongjoong and Yunho — both men happy and willing to give you any and everything your heart desires, especially sexually, at the drop of a hat, the concept of being 'cat and moused,' as it were — while annoying and not something all too familiar to you, also had awakened a certain arousal within you that you find to have been previously unearthed.

And for better or for worse, you can't put the genie back in the bottle.

What's one more date, after all?

It's the second date that you truly come to terms with how in over your head you might really be with one Jung Wooyoung.

You trusted Hongjoong with your life, that much was true. When it came to your physical, emotional, or mental well-being, you knew that your best friend always had you at the forefront of his care and concern.

But he was out of his fucking mind with this one.

It's the next day after your first date with Wooyoung that he texts you and asks you if you'd like to join him for another outing the next week. Without coming off as too interested, you ignore it for half the day and finally reply that you'll see if you can find time in your ever so busy schedule for him, to which he annoyingly laughs and says that he'll pick you up at 19:00 on Thursday. Figure it was worth a shot.

You realize that this time, given the circumstances of the date at hand, that you're actually entirely unsure of whether or not Hongjoong knows of your whereabouts for the evening. The topic never comes up with Wooyoung — brown dress shirt with all of the same buttons missing as the last time and another set of different but presumably equally expensive dress pants, shoes and blazer to match — this time your eye also happens to catch on the gleam of a gold chain hanging daintily around his neck, so thin it could be mistaken for a string if not for the unmistakable logo of an incredibly luxurious jewelry brand adorning the middle of it.

His ostentatious desire to show off his wealth is off-putting in all of the same ways that you're attracted to it: the unabashed display of not caring one way or another what the person next to him may think.

And this evening, you allowed yourself some room to show off: a stringier, moderately revealing garment adorning your torso — less done-up and prudish than the time previous, and you can tell that he notices the moment that you step out of his car and he follows you inside to the next expensive restaurant in which he intends to play his games with you — eyes trailing and lingering, like a predator that just laid eyes upon its prey.

Once seated in a booth of an empty corner of the restaurant, Wooyoung asks you if you're fine with him ordering for the both of you, which you agree to. He makes quick work of it, much to your surprise — as if now a man with an agenda and no time to waste, his haste sets you a bit on edge. He's not particularly messy or lacking control, but rather with an underlying sense of urgency that wasn't present the last time the two of you met one another.

You're intrigued.

Wooyoung scoots closer to you in the booth — black cushion sinking beneath the both of you as he does so just before he stills hip to hip with you, he takes his drink into one hand and nudges for you to do the same, raising them both ever so slightly in cheers at the evening’s plans.

“So,” he starts just after swallowing a sip of his beverage, “what kind of men do you like?”

The question catches you off guard, nearly choking on the sip of your own, and turning to look at the man serves you even less as you catch the way that his eyes dance across the skin that you've made the mistake of lying bare and for his visual consumption.

“Actually, forget that,” he amends, gently placing an open palm on your thigh, just as he had the time before at the bar, the familiar touch lighting a fire against your skin all over again. Wooyoung leans in closer to you, so close that you can feel the heat of his breath against your cheek. “What kind of sex do you like?”

You sort of wish you understood it, or could explain it — why it was that you felt so put off by the man's actions in the moment. The same man that only a week ago you were willing to do just about anything to have him in your space like this, now granting you precisely what it was that you wished for and if you were being completely honest with yourself...it was turning you off of him.

Too much too quickly, perhaps.

And perhaps Wooyoung is as perceptive as you anticipated him to be, just as quickly pulling away from you and creating the space that you were silently asking for — as well as taking the hand on your leg with it.

That could have stayed, you think to yourself.

“I'll start,” he whispers loud enough to be heard over the hustle and bustle of the busy restaurant.

Elbow up against the table and chin resting in his hand all over again, the scene feels familiar, and with that, comforting to some degree. The blonde's gentle gaze meets your eyes softly and allows silence to wash past the both of you for a moment before carrying on. A timeout, of sorts, and much needed by you. You're impressed by his ability to pick up on it, the sexiness you previously thought of him already returning to the way in which you view him.

And it would only get worse the more that he talked.

“I like to be versatile,” he starts, taking the martini glass between his fingers and thumb and holding it up near his lips but without intent to sip from it. “I like to play the part of a missing piece, whatever is needed of me, I'm happy to give it.”

“So you're a switch,” you say confidently, only to watch him shrug and a small tug take one of the corners of his mouth...as if you had only begun unraveling all of the layers of one Jung Wooyoung.

You didn't think that to be far off from the truth.

“Something like that. I simply consider myself to be good at all positions.”

His tone drops at the last few words, dripping with lust. Your arousal notices it, as well.

“There's very little that I haven't done, and just about as much that I won't still do,” he adds, now sipping from his drink, your eyes glued to the way his tongue glides over his slick bottom lip and you can't help but think of how his mouth might look covered in a different kind of wetness. “A lot of people think they're good at everything, I know I am.”

Your eyes slowly drop down to the button-less expanse of his exposed chest, the chain that you once found gaudy now dangling in a way that entices you towards desiring more just where it lie.

Wooyoung's hand snakes its way back onto your thigh and you just about jump into his touch as he does so, fingers pressing over a bit further than before. Closer to the apex of your legs but without any actual intent to touch you there.

It's working. Whatever it is that he had set out to do, it was working. You were putty in his hands, just like that — before you ever even knew what had hit you.

“That's why Hongjoong said I was the right fit.”

Hearing his name jolts you back to reality in a way that you could never anticipate, the immediate feeling of guilt settling in your chest, as if you're doing something wrong; then having to be talked down by logic.

You don't even notice Wooyoung lean in towards you, closing the distance between your bodies again before whispering against your ear, “And if they don't deserve it, I don't give it to them.”

It's a power display, for sure. Alluding to the cat and mouse game, and Hongjoong having warned you that Wooyoung would need to be courted — this isn't news to you. You're unsure whether or not you're winning, however — Wooyoung's hand slipping painfully slowly and further down between your thighs as warm breath tickles your skin, as humiliating as it would be you want nothing more than to allow your legs to fall apart and let him finally have his way with you.

But you don't really think he would, anyways. All part of the game.

When dinner arrives, you're not sure if you're thankful for it or not as Wooyoung pulls away and speaks to the waiter as if nothing had ever happened. You wished for the ability to feel the same — but the wet spot in your panties unwilling to allow you to get away with such a fib.

On the drive home — once again facilitated by the man himself — you know not to expect anything this time. In fact, you're well aware of how the end of the evening will turn out after the last time, engaging in futile attempts to not think of all of the same things you had been thinking of same as the last, in addition to all of the extra ways in which the man beside you had insisted on torturing you this evening, to some degree there was a bit of comfort in knowing precisely how the night was going to end. No more games, no more 'what ifs.'

Vehicle stilling on the side of the road just a bit down from your apartment building, Wooyoung turns off the ignition and turns to you, evil intent written all over his features. Now, you're not so sure.

“Come here.”

It's just above a whisper, and you know exactly what it is that he means by the request, all but jumping across the center console and placing your face into one of his palms with ease as he leans forward to meet you — his lips soft and plush just as you had anticipated them to be, the sudden and unexpected contact immediately ignites that fire in your groin — the anticipation, the want, the need for him to touch you, only exacerbated by the way his teeth gently graze your bottom lip in a slow and sensuous kiss. You realized in the moment that you hadn't put much thought into how he would kiss, but that the tenderness he currently exhibited not be what you would have expected.

Perhaps you would have been projecting.

In only a few more moments, Wooyoung is shrugging his blazer off of his shoulders while still seated in the driver's side of his car, followed quickly by the motion for the both of you to climb into the backseat.

This isn't what you had expected — if even on a base level you hadn't been expecting to have sex with him tonight, you certainly weren't expecting it to be in the backseat of his horrifically expensive car. But who are you to judge.

You find yourself barely settled into the backseat before Wooyoung has you by the ankles, pulling you down and lengthwise along the beige seating, only to quickly snake soft hands up the length of your legs and curling fingers into the elastic band of your panties. The heaviness of the circumstances making you reel, you realize that you're still not entirely sure if this is okay to be doing, given everything, but you're far too taken with desire for him to really think it through much further — throwing caution to the wind as you pry your legs apart for him to settle between while his hands make quick work of his belt with a loud clanking sound that you're sure could wake the neighbors.

It's now that his mouth works yours with more haste, once calm kisses against your lips now met with teethy, sloppy biting and nibbling — occasionally trailing down and against your jaw if for no other reason than to taste you. It's dizzying the effect that this man has on you in the moment, recalling back only a few hours prior where for a moment you thought that you might not have any interest in him at all anymore.

Now? Now you'll beg if it's desired of you.

In the darkness of the backseat, you're mostly unable to see him, only feeling and hearing the motion of him pushing his slacks down only enough to expose himself for what's necessary, the throbbing between your legs heightening in excitement, Wooyoung leans down and against your body again, propped up by one hand against the car door as the other blindly fishes for the side of your panties, only to push it away for plans soon to come.

Teeth dragging along the skin of your neck, then up and to your jaw again, you feel him grin into your skin, a finger teasingly prodding at your folds.

“Is Hongjoong going to be upset?”

Aside from the question in and of itself, Wooyoung's tone sounds almost sing-songy, as if playing a game. Like it's dirty talk to bring it up.

Like he hopes you'll say yes. But you don't.

And that's the wrong answer.

Feeling him still from over you, Wooyoung plants a few more kisses onto your skin as if to tell you that it's okay, that you didn't do anything wrong, and that this is all a part of the plan. The game. You get it, you understand him by now, but fucking hell.

“Ah,” he whispers, pulling himself up and tucking himself back into his slacks before buttoning them and gently pulling your dress back down and over your undergarments. “Perhaps I'm not that interested just yet, then.”

A tease. You can hear it in his fucking voice. All a game to him, really.

It happens like a whirlwind, hardly able to recall the details of it in your incredibly heightened and horny state — only the lingering memory of a blonde man grinning at you from his driver's side window as you try to make your way back up to your apartment in one piece. Wooyoung tells you to text him when you get in, to make sure you're safe, even though you're only a few feet out from your place, anyways.

And under normal circumstances, texting this man again you would not, but these are far from normal circumstances, and if Jung Wooyoung knows how to do anything, he can make you need it, on a deeply instinctual level.

And need it you do.

On Saturday, you have a lunch date with your best friend.

Gripping your coat tightly upon entering the building, attempting to shield yourself from the outside wind, a wave of relief hits you once enveloped by the warmth that the cafe brings you. Inviting and comforting — even more so once your eyes land on Hongjoong, seated in a corner next to a large, indoor plant and with a latte already in hand.

“Hey, sorry I'm late.”

Hongjoong shakes his head, “You’re not, I already ordered for you.”

You thank him, and before you even have a chance to sit, the barista announces the readiness of your drink. Rushing over, you thank them and head back to the table, finally seated and sighing as if you had just run a marathon.

The past week or so certainly felt that way.

You know that this meeting is a check in, of sorts. That he's curious about how things are ‘going.’ That even if he had been informed from the other side, that Hongjoong would always make it a point to check in with you, as well. You appreciated the sentiment.

But you weren't entirely sure what to tell him, either.

Lines long ago muddled and blurry in pretty much all directions: you and Hongjoong, you and Wooyoung, Wooyoung and Hongjoong, especially — you couldn't be sure how much information needed to be presented — how much was too much?

“So,” he starts, white mug pressed to his lips and looking up at you over it. “How are things with Wooyoung?”

You want to believe that Hongjoong would never set you up to fail. That he would never play games, would never test you.

Shifting in your chair, hesitant on how to answer the question for numerous reasons and tracing your thumb over the rim of your own mug — you finally land on a decision.

The truth.

“I don't know if it's going to work out.”

Sipping his drink, you watch as one of his eyebrows cocks up, as if confused by the response he has just received. Swallowing his beverage, he sets the mug back down, but decides against interjecting right away as silence takes the table that the both of you are sat at.

And then he laughs.

Back pressing against the chair and arms folding, Hongjoong looks a little bit as though he had expected this result to some degree. Perhaps he had.

“I know how Wooyoung is, he's difficult, I get it,” he says casually, and in the moment you almost wish he was aware of the torment that the man in question had been putting you through. Maybe then he wouldn't be so nonchalant about the whole ordeal, but Hongjoong carries on with the thought. “He plays games, likes to be chased, likes to feel like he has the upper hand—“

You want to cut him off and scream about how he has no fucking clue, but suppose he does, given his recital of it to you currently. You bite it back.

“—If it feels too easy, too attainable, too...how do I say? If there's nothing exciting to it he sort of loses interest quickly.”

“So he doesn't like people who want to fuck him? Does this not register as some sort of red flag to you?” you reply.

Hongjoong chuckles again, “It’s not like that, he definitely likes when people want him, that's sort of the entire thing for him. Loves being desired, but that comes easy to him — gotta give him some extra spice to toy with.”

You don't like the way that the word ‘spice’ falls from your best friend's mouth, tonal ambiguity that simultaneously implies that he knows exactly what it is that he's talking about. It causes you to wonder just how it is that Hongjoong knows so much about the man, that yes — you are aware they are friends and have been for many years, but why is it that you had never been made privy until now?

Maybe best left unknown, Yumeko serving as a still rather fresh reminder that attaining all of the knowledge does not always placate.

It's the concept of ‘spice’ that brings you back to only a few nights back in front of your apartment building, Wooyoung between your legs, exposed, and finally willing to give you precisely what it was you had been wanting.

Until of course, you told him that Hongjoong wouldn't be mad about it.

“How annoying,” you finally reply after a few moments of quiet, and Hongjoong nods, pulling himself forward and taking his latte back into his hands. “Oh, I agree.”

“Is it worth it?” you ask with a sigh as eyes look up and towards you again through long eyelashes across the table.

“Probably.”

On the third date — which you reluctantly agree to and only do so at the insistence of your bestie, with two weeks’ time having passed since the second, you find that time truly does solve so many problems. Desire having waned and taking a backseat to the practicality of the situation, you comfortably reside in the passenger seat of his car as Wooyoung takes the both of you to a remote wooded area just outside of the city — a beautiful view, and obviously somewhere that he's scouted out before, you can't help but wonder how many people he's brought here before — not that it matters, but it appears as though Wooyoung's whole entire being is simply wrapped up in being served in some way or another. Socially, financially, sexually — and perhaps all equally interchangeable to him.

Wooyoung opens the bottle of wine with a pop, carefully pouring the both of you a glass before setting it down beside the car and leaning against the front hood of his car next to you — both wordlessly gazing out upon the sights of the city, often unseen from this distance.

“I can't believe I've never come out here before,” you say after a sip of wine. “It's beautiful.”

“Yeah,” he agrees, turning his sights towards you. “Quiet, secluded—“ the hand closest to you delicately pressing up and onto the inside of your thigh. You still at the touch, truthfully, you had forgotten what him touching you felt like.

It didn't take much effort for him to reignite that flame all over again.

“—No one can hear you.”

Wooyoung inches towards you more, closing the distance between the two of your bodies while simultaneously taking the glass from your hand and only dipping down and off of the car long enough to set them onto the ground and out of the way, now standing in front of you he grasps you by the ankles, gently pulling you down the hood and towards him, settling your legs on either side with a smirk. Evil. You can't even allow yourself to be excited for whatever it is to come, completely unsure of how he plans to leave you high and dry tonight.

But when he kisses you again, the need to protect oneself just as quickly melts away — instantaneously recalling all of the ways in which the man had you wrapped around his finger to begin with — aching and breathless, the only thoughts in your head now along the lines of doing any and everything it takes to get what you want.

You hate to think that that conversation with Hongjoong over afternoon brunch may have given you the keys to getting fucked by his friend tonight. Absolutely bizarre, and still entirely gray area.

Dominant hand snaking up the inside of your thigh and disappearing under your skirt as teeth trail down your jaw and to your neck, you don't even bother to make an effort to mask your desire for him — it's evident that he's into the fact, that your wanting him this bad in turn makes him want you, so when his finger hooks into the side of your panties and the flat of another presses against your wetness, you allow yourself the luxury of moaning. Too long and too much teasing up until this point, you need him. You need him to know it, too.

So elated at his touch, you almost don't even hear your phone buzzing, just poking out from the top of your purse lying next to the both of you. Almost.

Wooyoung doesn't stop, but you glance down to see who it is. Your insistence in doing so causes the man attached to your skin to do the same — your reactions to the information, however, show to be quite different as you feel his teeth bear against you as the result of a grin.

Hongjoong.

“Ignore it.”

You have half a mind not to, because you don't typically ignore Hongjoong. Not that you never have, but the other part of you is merely thankful that Wooyoung not instruct you to take the call.

Wooyoung brings another finger down, now pressing two of them slowly but intently inside of you, and the unexpected intrusion has you seeing stars, the moan you had intended to let out merely getting caught in your throat and sounding far more strangled than ever intended.

“Oh,” he sings out and against your neck, “Good girl, you listen so well.”

And you know that he feels the way you tighten against his fingers, thankful that he chooses not to verbally acknowledge it.

It's embarrassingly quick that Wooyoung has you unraveling in the palm of his hand, head thrown back and arms barely able to keep yourself mounted in place as your thighs shake around him as you cum — you don't snap out of it quickly either, grasping his mouth into yours and a hand gripping into his dress shirt once you gain the ability to hold yourself up — a desperate, non-verbal plea for more: he's taken it this far, surely he doesn't have the strength to hold back, the fortitude to deny the both of you further.

Maybe if he were any other man.

But Wooyoung pulls away from you, gently prying your fingers from the fabric adorning him and smiles — a smile that says that you did good, and that he has every intention of carrying on.

Not now, though. Not yet.

“Come to mine on Friday,” he says, voice low and nearly a whisper, conveying that he plans on giving you precisely what it is that you've wanted from him all this time.

Hand once again finding its way up your skirt, a finger playfully toying with the wet spot on your panties — still so sensitive from the orgasm just a few minutes prior. “You'll come over, yeah?”

“Y-yeah,” you whimper out, humiliated by the way this man has broken you down and rendered you completely pliable in his hand. “Just tell me when.”

“Oh, I will,” he answers back, finger still tracing the lightest circles over you and leaning in to whisper against your ear.

“I give good direction.”

Friday night.

You had forgotten what it felt like, anxiety related indigestion caused by the anticipation of the unknown, but the car ride over serves you a stark reminder of the fact. Picking at the skin around your nails only to force yourself to stop — and just as quickly start up again, it's the gnawing feeling in your gut that reminds you that you aren't really sure what it is that you have agreed to tonight.

Obviously, consent isn't a concern. You trusted Wooyoung well enough and felt comfortable with him — that if it were a safety concern of any kind, Hongjoong never would have suggested the man to begin with.

It's simply the unknown of it all, sinking like a rock in your stomach and only coming loose to do the occasional, nauseating flip.

Another somewhat flashy dress, cut even a bit lower than the ones previously, as if your willingness to present skin to him a visual timeline of the way that the situation had progressed — you pressed a fallen strap up and onto your shoulder once again from where it had fallen upon exiting the taxi, now standing in the busy and bustling sidewalk in front of Wooyoung's undoubtedly wildly expensive condo.

The irony of your anxiety: he was almost certainly, finally going to fuck you.

The longest elevator ride of your life, considering Wooyoung only lived on the 17th floor. The ding of the arrival reminding you of the first night that you met the man, and how your uncertainty that night paled in comparison to now. You didn't know what to expect then, and somehow upon spending more time with him...you knew what to expect even less now.

1704.

Surprisingly quickly after knocking, Wooyoung opens the door and greets you with a smile. Purple, silken dress shirt and a nice pair of slacks as usual, it's a familiar sight, except for the way his hair isn't done to perfection this time — wavy and to the sides, you find that it's surprisingly adorable, and gives him a far more approachable visual appeal than how he typical likes to carry himself. You can't help but wonder why it is he chose tonight to unveil the look.

That is until you step inside of his apartment.

You don't even notice it at first, not anticipating having to glance around for anything out of the ordinary, so it's only after you remove your heels and set your bag down that the site of the other, navy blue haired man seated in the living room nearly brings you to a screeching halt. Emphasis on the screeching.

What the fuck?

And you quickly come to realize that Oh, it's happening. It's happening now.

“Ya know,” Hongjoong says, arm thrown over the back of the black leather couch to grant him the leverage to turn to look over it at you. “I thought you might not come.”

But Wooyoung chuckles at that. “I knew she would.”

Dizzying is an understatement, and you're not entirely sure how you feel about them having sprung this on you like this. You expected the next step to be a full on conversation, not simply being invited into it unbeknownst to you. A conversation you'd have to have with Hongjoong later. After the fact.

Well, you weren't upset enough to leave, of course.

Did...Hongjoong know you had been invited over tonight under the assumption that you would be having sex with Wooyoung — and only Wooyoung?

Too many questions swimming around in your head and not enough time to sort through them before the blonde man takes you by the hand and walks you over towards the living room, adjacent to your best friend. Delicately handing you a glass of champagne, he allows you a moment to take a sip from the glass before bringing a hand up and to the side of your face — thumb grazing over the skin before pulling you into his for a kiss.

But it feels weird. Weird with Hongjoong there, watching it happen. Watching his friend kiss you with intent to do much more. You try to lean into it, play along as best you can in hopes that you'll get into it and your reluctance will melt away with time.

Jung Wooyoung is far too perceptive for his own good, however.

Pulling away from you slowly, he looks into your eyes gently, accompanied with a soft smile. You think that in that moment, it's the first time that he's looked at you without an undercurrent of nefarious intent. Instead, a once wicked and alluring man is replaced with someone gentle and kind.

You find the duality alluring in and of itself. Of course, no one is one thing all of the time, such is humanity, but not everyone is always so keen on letting people see all of the sides of themselves. A man with a tough and expensive image, but so willing to let it fall away with ease in an attempt to elicit comfort and understanding.

Maybe you were starting to see what Hongjoong had seen.

“Don't worry,” he whispers to you, carefully stepping back. Watching as he strides towards Hongjoong, you patiently await whatever it is that he plans on unveiling to calm your nerves. “I'll make sure we're all comfortable.”

You don't know what that means, exactly.

Watching Wooyoung intently as he stills in front of Hongjoong — still looking at you briefly before finally pulling his eyes from you and setting down on the man in front of him, it surely happens in slow motion, it simply must be in slow motion as he sinks down and to his knees in between Hongjoong's legs. You watch his hands trail up familiar legs, easily recalling the way that it feels from both sides before Wooyoung's fingers grip into the sides of Hongjoong's jeans and begin their descent down.

You've got to be hallucinating now.

And for your viewing pleasure, the blonde man wastes no time taking Hongjoong into his mouth, hollowing his cheeks and slowly bobbing along the other man’s length. You watch the way one of Hongjoong's hands finds its way into blonde hair, pulling it up and away — you're more than familiar with the act of kindness — as well as the breathy cuss that escapes from Hongjoong's lips when Wooyoung takes him especially deep into his mouth.

A little in awe, Hongjoong being with men is no news to you, and Wooyoung partaking in the same is no surprise, either. The two of them together? Well, you had suspected as much.

But this show was for you, in particular, and Hongjoong's half-lidded gaze towards you as Wooyoung swallowed his length down offered some sort of special, previously locked away level of intimacy shared between the two of you that you were never even aware existed to begin with.

It also lit the arousal between your legs on fire.

Only carrying on for a few minutes, Wooyoung climbs back up and off of his knees, walking towards you and wasting no time pulling you into another kiss — this time rougher, laced with far more need. His fingers battling with the buttons on the front of his shirt as he does so, he pulls back to look you deeply in the eyes, allowing nothing but silence between you if only for a second before speaking.

“Do you like how he tastes on my mouth?”

You think that your legs might give out on the spot.

With Wooyoung's shirt removed and discarded elsewhere, you're finally able to view what it is that you have been desiring all of this time — toned, tan skin — you don't even have enough time to take it in before your attention is brought to the fact that he's unbuckling his belt, and then plump lips pressed against your neck, trailing down your shoulder. You find the visual and physical stimulation of the ordeal so overwhelming, having not even noticed that Hongjoong had removed himself from his spectator’s view and positioned himself behind you — only becoming aware upon feeling his own familiarity across otherwise empty skin, mirroring the work of Wooyoung.

“Should move to the bedroom,” Wooyoung murmurs into your skin, and you nod embarrassingly quickly at the suggestion, bringing forth light giggles from both men. “First room on the right,” he instructs, nodding forward and towards the hallway.

And he wastes no time, of course, pressing your back into the excessively plush bedding — not even bothering to pull any of it out from under you before he's got his fingers hooked into your panties as Hongjoong wrestles with getting your dress up and off of the rest of you from behind.

Overwhelming was an understatement, but the excitement of the scenario proving far too much to ignore. It was no longer a want, it was a need.

With your panties off and flung to the side, Wooyoung wastes no time prying your legs apart to make room for him — knelt down for the second time that night and pulling you by the hips towards the edge of the bed. Bringing a single hand up and forward, pressing the pad of his middle finger along the wetness of your slit, he looks up at you with the devious sort of grin that you had become much more accustomed to over your time spent with the man.

“If you say 'no,' or 'stop,' I stop, okay?”

In your horny haze, you're not even sure why he's telling you this — Hongjoong leaning down from behind you and pressing a kiss to your forehead as if to calm you ahead of time.

You nod, and Wooyoung accepts the compliance with terms as he presses his mouth against you, tongue digging between your folds and flat against your clit almost immediately. The sudden sensation makes you jump, whimper just as quickly escaping your lips. You hear Hongjoong giggle from behind you, settling in a way that grants him easier access to your face as he gently smooths more kisses across your forehead and hairline, hand carefully pulling away hair that threatens to get pulled into your mouth between gasps of air and cusses as a result of Wooyoung — it's the combination of sensations that you realize has you truly reeling, that one or the other, while certainly good on their own, simply don't compare to the sensory overload of both.

You figure they knew this, though.

And it's not your first threesome, either. But it's the first one where you're the focus.

Past the few initial and experimental licks, the blonde between your legs wastes no time digging his tongue in and against you. The first time he brings you close to the edge, he doesn't get you there — chalking it up to inexperience with a new partner, not knowing all of the ways to make them tick, it's an easy mistake to make.

After the third, and the gleam in his eye becoming apparent, now you know that he's doing it on purpose.

And the more that he does it, the less in control you are. Whining and thrashing against the sheets beneath you, every time that Wooyoung's lips latch onto you, you can't help the way that your hips bear down and against him — even in spite of him having hands gripped into your hips to keep you in place. Once he has you building on your fifth lost orgasm — hand pulling down and gripping into long, yellowy locks of hair, you grind down and against his face, with tears pricking the corners of your eyes in need for the release he's denied you, now, more times than you can really count.

“Please, Wooyoung, p-please—“ you whimper, not above begging for what you need and almost sure of the fact that reducing you to this had been his intention all along, it's the comfort of Hongjoong's warm lips against your temple that help calm you.

“You're doing so well,” he whispers into your skin, Wooyoung still hard and fast with his tongue into your cunt. “Baby, you're doing so good for us.”

“Oh my god, Joong, I—“

The orgasm hits you sudden and hard, partially because you don't anticipate Wooyoung granting it to you, then paired with Hongjoong's insistence in showering you with praise — muscles in your legs and abdomen tightening so hard it's nearly excruciating just before the release, all you can manage out is a string of expletives as you come — Wooyoung enthusiastically sucking you through it, two fingers buried deep inside of you as you do so.

When you begin to be able to catch your breath, you're not entirely sure how you can even carry on from this point.

But the man in charge has other plans.

“Up,” he says, motioning for you to move further along the bed to make room, hands fiddling with his pant button now with a belt long since removed, you manage to pull your eyes away from the sight before you to gaze up and at him. He grins. “That's not what you came for.”

Pants dropping down his legs, even from beneath the confines of his boxer briefs you can tell what you're in for already, pussy throbbing in anticipation of a particular feeling of fullness.

Wooyoung crawls onto the bed and between your legs, leaning forward and motioning for Hongjoong to come forward which he obliges. The two men kiss just above your line of vision — all tongue and teeth and seduction. When Wooyoung pulls away, he asks Hongjoong if he likes how you taste on him this time.

“She tastes better on me.”

Playful and matter of fact, but you can't help but wonder if there's something underlying the message.

With a sinful grin in response, Wooyoung motions for the both of them to switch places, instructing you to get onto all fours which you quickly oblige. “I want to feel your mouth on me,” he admits, gently running a hand through your hair as he settles in front of you with cock standing at attention — it's the first time you're seeing it, really seeing it. He's big, which you had anticipated, but more in girth than length, and you waste no time at all pressing the flat of your tongue to the underside of him as you feel Hongjoong settle in from behind, a finger delicately tracing your wet slit, knowing that he need not warm you up for him any further.

A slow, deliberate drive into you from behind as you take Wooyoung into your mouth shallowly, experimentally — eyes falling down and onto the way that your lips barely fit around his dick, he groans at the sight, fingers only slightly gripping harder into the strands atop your head.

“Three taps on my thigh and we stop,” he says, an amendment to the initially instated rules to allow for your inability to speak. “Won't get rough but it can be a lot.”

You're not even entirely sure of what he means by ‘a lot,’ you figure he's doing his best to give direction despite being fucked out already and wanting desperately to fuck your face and not doing so — your best guess is that he simply means the situation in general, and you can easily understand what he means with a particularly hard thrust from Hongjoong sends you forward and as a result, Wooyoung's length further into your mouth than you had anticipated. He doesn't say anything and doesn't pull you off, but you feel his grip in your hair soften, as if to grant you the ease of pulling off of him with haste should you need it.

“God you look so good with my cock in your mouth,” Wooyoung groans, experimentally giving shallow thrusts forward. “So pretty, like it was meant for you.”

The praise makes you groan, clenching around Hongjoong as his hands dip down and clasp around your waist to pull you back and harder against him. “Perfect girl, all for us tonight,” Hongjoong adds, leaning down and pressing his mouth against the skin of your back.

In the moment, you sort of wish you could see him. Hongjoong, that is. You find that as good as it feels, there's a certain sense of intimacy lost in the scenario. It's not bad, nor is it wrong, but different.

Perhaps not one you find yourself willing to give up again any time soon.

With a few more drives into you from behind, Hongjoong comes, burying his cock deep within and feeling the way that he throbs inside of you as he pumps you full of his release. Upon his exit, Wooyoung looks down at you before looking back up and towards the man spent and across the bed.

“I want to fuck your girlfriend.”

The statement has you dizzy, in more ways than you really have time to acknowledge in the moment.

But it's Hongjoong's acknowledgment of it that truly sends you through a loop, or rather, lack thereof.

“Wear a condom.”

Sure, you were going to insist on the same thing, but...that's his response?

Pulling off of Wooyoung's length, you look up at him to catch the way that he licks his lips and grins in response to Hongjoong's demand. Not an unheard of request by any means, but if one were to look just a bit more deeply into it — sure, perhaps there are some implications past the base level.

You and Hongjoong really have got to have that sit down talk.

“You know, safety,” Hongjoong adds, lying back with his chest still heaving from his orgasm and fingers running through short, navy blue hair. “You're having sex with other people.”

His insistence in explaining the request away only serving to betray him in the end — it goes without saying why anyone in their right of mind would insist on the additional party in a threesome arrangement to wear protection.

Everyone knows that, so what is it really that Hongjoong is trying to explain away?

Wooyoung leans back and towards his nightstand, pulling out a metallic package and once again trading places with Hongjoong — smaller of the two settling in front of you and stroking your head as you feel Wooyoung lining himself up at your entrance — you think about how this is what you have been dying for for weeks now, how at times it felt so reminiscent of the way in which you desired Hongjoong what feels like all of those months ago.

Looking up and meeting eyes with Hongjoong, he smiles down at you gently, fingernails lightly pressing into your scalp as his fingers run through your hair.

It's intimate, as everything with Hongjoong ultimately is.

The initial stretch of Wooyoung entering you is what brings your eyes back down, gritting teeth and hissing at the intrusion. You knew he was big, and even in spite of having just been fucked open, you found it not to be enough — the burn of the pull of his cock so unfamiliar and new that your fingers grip harder into the sheets below, arms no longer granting the ability to keep yourself up as your front half falls flat against the bed.

Hongjoong follows you there, lying opposite lengthwise to rest his head next to yours. “Fuck,” you hiss, and your best friend chuckles next to you before kissing the side of your head.

“You take him well, I've watched people tap out immediately.”

Once again, a conversation for another day, but feeling the pull of Wooyoung along your insides as he readies himself for another push inside has the burning in your stomach building so much faster than you had ever anticipated. You feel as though you have gone into this situation with all of the information you could have: you wanted it bad, he had a big dick — and yet here you were, your body threatening to betray you in the worst kind of way, only a few strokes in and cautioning the quick arrival of your orgasm.

Biting back sounds the best you can as not to give yourself away, eyes tightly shut and eyebrows furrowed as you're slowly and repeatedly pressed into the mattress from behind, you feel the enamored gaze of Hongjoong on you from the side — you know he knows, you just hope he won't say it.

But the following drive of Wooyoung into you is a harsh snap of his hips — rough and hard and causing the loud sound of skin meeting skin to echo through the room. Your pathetic, unmasked cry out follows.

You sound like you're going to cry. You don't feel as though that's far from the case.

Met with another one, now it's his name followed by a whiny “fuck,” that drops from you.

And now he knows.

Reaching forward and pulling your arms back, Wooyoung asserts his physical strength in a way not seen before, using your arms for leverage against you as he effectively has you balancing on his cock as he fucks into you hard. It's overwhelming, now having an even clearer view of Hongjoong's sight of you — you'd be lying if you didn't feel a wash of humiliation, but the tight grin on your best friend's face more than placating the feeling.

Three, four more pushes into you, and Wooyoung asks “Gonna come untouched, huh?”

You nod quickly. You hate that it's true, but it is.

And pressing you back down, face first into the mattress, he delivers a few more hard drives into you before feeling you clench hard against his cock in the early stages of your release — mouth hung open, whining and crying out as you come around him — buried so deep into you that you worry if he were any longer it'd hurt. A few seconds into it, the blonde man behind you resumes his pace against you, hard and quick and quite obviously chasing his own release — coming quick enough that you wonder just how good his orgasm control really is — Wooyoung quickly pulls the condom off, wrapping his hand around himself to stroke him through his own as ropes of milky cum wash across your behind and his fingers.

Chest heaving, Wooyoung sinks down and brings himself face first into your freshly fucked pussy, licking a long stripe against you that has you whimpering in overstimulation.

“Always an overachiever,” Hongjoong laughs as you finally crumble from exhaustion, falling to your side just between the two men. “You were amazing,” he then says, eyes fixating on you now and full of what could only be described as adoration.

Hongjoong had a habit of looking at you like he was in love with you. You couldn't help but wonder if he knew it.

Moving along the bed, Wooyoung makes his way closer towards the both of you, lying on your other side opposite of your best friend, breathing still ragged from the night's events having only just ended.

“Is it okay if I touch you?” he asks quietly, nearly a whisper, and you nod — enjoying the feeling of his tender touch across the expanse of your stomach. “Can I get you anything? Is there anything either of you need?”

You wonder why it is that Wooyoung seems to naturally take on this sort of caretaker role in these sorts of scenarios. A man that carries himself as one of suffocating self-importance and borderline selfishness, at all points in the night resigning himself to being not necessarily the one in charge, or the one giving order — but the one ensuring that everything goes well. That everyone is taken care of.

No one is everything all of the time.

Throat dry, you manage out a request for a glass of water which the blonde hurriedly obliges, rushing off and into the kitchen, it's in the short absence that you reach out to locate Hongjoong — now seated and breath caught, you don't even think twice before rolling towards him and lazily placing your head in his lap.

And he doesn't think twice before adoringly tangling his fingers in your hair again.

“Are you happy?” he asks in a whisper, as if he doesn't want Wooyoung to even have a chance to hear the question.

You smile tiredly, sleep threatening to take you by the second.

“Yeah.”

♡ send me your thoughts and feelings in my ask.

⎯ ୨previous୧ ⎯ ○ ⎯ ୨next୧ ⎯

#wooyoung smut #ateez smut #wooyoung x reader #wooyoung x you #wooyoung x y/n #ateez x reader #ateez x you #ateez x y/n #wooyoung scenarios #wooyoung imagines #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #hongjoong smut #hongjoong x reader #hongjoong x you #hongjoong x y/n #hongjoong imagines #hongjoong scenarios

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pinkbrries · 1 year

Text

— A–Z with June —

[find hannah’s version here] | [find izabella’s version here] | june’s masterlist

➤ A is for… after experiencing “feelings” i’ve decided that this just isn’t for me, but thank you for the opportunity

➤ B is for… *talking to heeseung* bro your vibes are so cool and you’re amazing… hold my hand bro

➤ C is for… call it whatever you want: an ‘accident’ or a ‘near death experience’ but the truth is: that was a vibe check from god

➤ D is for… dude, at this point? i think the easiest way to feel ‘wanted’ is to simply rob a bank / [jake looking at her with concern] noona, don’t

➤ E is for… everyone here must know that it’s not blood that runs through these veins but glitter gel pen ink

➤ F is for… fortunately for me but unfortunately for my company, i will keep doing whatever i want

➤ G is for… *looking at the i-land cameras* good morning! … but at what cost

➤ H is for… *reading a weird comment on vlive* haha yeah–uhm, babygirl… there is something obviously wrong with your brain… haha

➤ I is for… i suck at flirting, i end up fighting with them instead:/

➤ J is for… just so everyone know, this is my emotional support song, so nope, i won’t change it

➤ K is for… kisses? the only person that deserve my kisses is kim sunoo<3

➤ L is for… *trying to imitate jake* LETS GAUUUUURRRR

➤ M is for… mmh yeah, i’m not going to wear my contacts anymore, i’ve seen enough

➤ N is for… next time i’m opening to someone is during my autopsy

➤ O is for… okay but whoever has my voodoo doll, please kiss its forehead, i need it

➤ P is for… *’02 liners nagging at june because she won a game* [june looking behind the camera] pd-nim! they simply hate to see a girl boss winning

➤ Q is for… *during her solo vlive* question here engenes: do you ever want to just yell in someone’s face to date you? because same

➤ R is for… *singing at jay* row row row your boat, far away from me~

➤ S is for… sometimes it’s you and your cute comfy oversized sweater against the world and that’s okay

➤ T is for… *winks at the sky* this is for the aliens

➤ U is for… *reading a comment* ‘unnie, can you recommend me some musicals?’ yeah, i really like musicals but like, the real good musicals, for example the barbie movies–

➤ V is for… velvet? oh, as red velvet sunbaenim! [starts dancing ‘red flavor’ out of the blue]

➤ W is for… what can i say? i’m charming and irresponsible– i mean– irresistible;)

➤ X is for… *reading a math question in weekly idol* x+2y+6– wait a minute, JUNE! [raises her hand] THAT’S A TXT SUNBAENIM’S SONG! / [mc’s start laughing] no june, this is an actual math problem / oh…

➤ Y is for… you say you have a crush on a boy, but is he kim hongjoong sunbaenim? min yoongi sunbaenim? jeon wonwoo sunbaenim? because if he’s not, then thank you, next

➤ Z is for… zebras are so cool though, they didn’t want to be normal horses so they decided on painting stripes on theirselves… good for them

#enhypen 8th member #enhypen oc #enhypen au #enhypen female oc #enhypen female member #enhypen female addition #enhypen addition #enhypen #kpop female addition #kpop addition #kpop added member

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potatomountain · 2 years

Note

have you cross posted inherited demons on ao3? because i would love to download it onto my kindle if you have, the story is truly better than some published novels out there

I have actually! I'll have the link below so feel free to check it out! I guess i could add it to the masterlist too huh? haha

but thank you so much that means a lot to hear! I really want to be a published, and potentially best selling author some day <3

Inherited Demons (ateezXreader) (64932 words) by Cutiepiedoom Chapters: 18/? Fandom: ATEEZ (Band) Rating: Mature Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: ATEEZ Ensemble/Reader, Kim Hongjoong/Reader, Park Seonghwa/Reader, Jeong Yunho (ATEEZ) & Reader, Kang Yeosang/Reader, Song Mingi & Reader, Choi San (ATEEZ)/Reader, Jung Wooyoung (ATEEZ)/Reader, Choi Jongho (ATEEZ)/Reader Characters: Kim Hongjoong, Jeong Yunho (ATEEZ), Park Seonghwa, Kang Yeosang, Choi Jongho (ATEEZ), Jung Wooyoung (ATEEZ), Choi San (ATEEZ), Song Mingi (ATEEZ) Additional Tags: Demon Choi Jongho (ATEEZ), Demon Jung Wooyoung (ATEEZ), Demon Song Mingi (ATEEZ), Demon Jeong Yunho (ATEEZ), Demon Choi San (ATEEZ), Demon Kim Hongjoong, Demon Park Seonghwa, Demon ATEEZ, Demon Kang Yeosang, Demon Sex, Demon/Human Relationships, Eventual Smut, Eventual Sex, Polyamory, eight lovers, Yandere, Yandere Choi San (ATEEZ), Yandere Jeong Yunho (ATEEZ), Yandere Kim Hongjoong, yandere seonghwa, yandere mingi, yandere yeosang, yandere jongho, Family Member Death, Demons, lots of blood eventually, willadd tags as i go, just winging it, dealing with grief, Grief/Mourning, Comfort/Angst, lots of swearing, POV First Person, heartbreaker kang yeosang, Heavy BDSM, lots of kinks Summary: Reader insert first pov type oc. reader x Ateez. This was inspired by a fanfic i read on Tumblr (and they did it better tbh, its their pinned post) so go check it out: mint-yooxgi.tumblr.com "When my beloved Great Aunt Lilith passed away, I inherited all that belonged to her: her fortune, estate, and also the eight 'charges' that lived with her since the last time I saw her. Except none of that sounded right, I didn't even know she had others living with her after 4 years. I just wanted to uncover the hidden truths my beloved Aunt left me, but that was impossibly hard while dealing with the affections of 8 gorgeous men that didn't seem human at all." or mc inherits her aunts things only to find out Auntie made a deal with some demons and all those demons wanted was MC

#ao3fic #read on ao3 #inherited demons #ask answered #ask and it is given #ask and ye shall recieve

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seoultraveller · 4 years

Text

[A/N: I am kind of writing this for myself (ngl) but I thought it would be interesting to see how something like this plays out. A multi-part AU where the characters are attending university in South Korea. The main female character is black/African-American but that will later become more of a factor as the story goes on. Seonghwa and the MC exchange letters through a book in one of the libraries on campus and without know each other, grow a connection through that. Hongjoong is the classmate and group partner of the MC but has no idea that they are exchanging letters to each other until further on in the story. This part is just a quick introduction to the characters and their overall placements in the story.]

Her Secret Scribe, His Winter Dream (1)

Pairing: Seonghwa x Black Female MC & Hongjoong x Black Female MC

Genre: College!AU

Word Count: 2,885

October 29, 2020 ~4:50am

Waking up at around 4:50am, Seonghwa notices that his textbook, notes, highlighters, and pen are all still neatly placed on his desk. He placed it there with the intent to get some early morning studying in before his shower and a little bit after his shower, just before he left for his first class of the day. He wills himself up from his warm, soft, and comfortable bed to walk to the bathroom to freshen up. On his way to the bathroom, he passes by his roommates partially opened door and takes a peek to see if he made it in last night. Or more like, early this morning. Poking the top of his head through the door opening Seonghwa sees his roommate. There lies Hongjoong, fully clothed, face-first, bag still hanging off of his shoulder, lying on top of his bed, and in the starfish position. All Seonghwa can do is shake his head at his friend, knowing how bad his sleeping habits are and how much is is hardly at the apartment nowadays.

After checking on Hongjoong, Seonghwa goes to the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash his face. Then he strips himself of his pajamas and gets into the shower. Showers have always been a bit of a meditative practice to Seonghwa. His average time is forty minutes but there are occasions where he has spent up to 50 minutes or an hour in the shower. He prides himself on his cleanliness, both in how he physically presents himself and the spaces that he exists in (apartment, bed, desk, etc...).

Once his shower is done, he wraps his towel around his hips and then makes his way to the kitchen. There he takes out four eggs, a container of rice, and some steak that he grilled left over from the night before. Next, Seonghwa fills up a pot with water, sets it on one of the eyes of the stove and puts the fire on 8 (one of the highest settings). After dropping the four eggs in the water he rinses his hands off and proceeds to his bedroom to get changed.

Never one to make to much of a fuss of what he wears, Seonghwa puts on an undershirt, then throws on a grey long-sleeved thermal and a pair of black jeans. Long black socks to warm his feet, and he takes out a sweater and a jacket to keep himself warm on his way to class.

It’s around 6:00am by the time he is finished getting dressed and now, he tends to the food that is set out in the kitchen. Reheating the steak and rice, turning off the fire underneath the pot and taking out two of the hard boiled eggs for himself. He puts it all in a bowl that he takes back to his room, and eats at his desk, while going over his notes.

Seonghwa broke up his study time into two 45-minute sessions, which allows him time to prepare a bowl for Hongjoong for breakfast (if he eats it) and make it down to his bus before it pulls up at 8:30am.

Having followed his schedule to a ‘T’ this morning, he was proud of himself for making it to the library before the morning rush and acquiring a desk, with a view, on the third floor before they were all occupied. Instead of pushing himself to study a bit more, since today’s schedule was not Seonghwa’s usual schedule, he decided to write a letter on the off-chance that he can bring comfort to someone during mid-term season. Instead of writing on bathroom doors, or in the dark corner of a desk, Seonghwa decided to write a letter. Writing a letter and stashing it in a random book. It’s getting a bit chillier in South Korea, so although it was a long shot, perhaps he can create a pen-pal through this and maybe even get close and intimate during this period as well. However, that is a very, very, very long shot.

So with romantic thoughts of meeting someone who shares a like mind or sees life from a different perspective, he writes.

“Dear Student that is Enduring Mid-Terms and an Incoming Winter,

We are nearing the beginning of a new month which could mean a fresh new beginning for some. It could also mean nearing the end of something larger, like the semester. I know that it’s mid-term season but I am unsure if it has ended for you. I could only pray that you stay warm as the winter will be harsh as it usually is, but I am sure you knew that.

I honestly thought I would have more to say... but obviously not. I figured a formal letter would be better to connect with someone during this time, then short, informal, and weird messages written aimlessly. Now, I’m getting embarrassed... Sorry.

No one will probably read this so...

With Care,

The Secret Scribe”

-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

October 29, 2020 ~10:52am

Waiting in a hallway right outside the classroom, she, scrolls through her student email account on her phone and sees an email from her linguistics class. Linguistic Acquisition through Different Ages - LIA 3006. Although she knew, that to pass this class she must complete a project, she totally forgot that it had to be completed with at least one or two other people. A group project... “how despicable” she thought. The email that the professor sent, laid out the regulations of the project and even placed the class in neat groups of two or three. She was lucky enough to get paired with “Mr. Fashionably-Late because Staying Up to Work on My Art is More Important”. As the time got closer and closer to 11:00am, Hongjoong is still nowhere to be seen. She’s just praying that he comes through at least ten minutes into class and not twenty minutes before it’s over. However, she could only pray for such a thing.

At 11:11am on the dot, Hongjoong comes through the door quietly. Chest heaving up and down because he was sprinting through the campus and hallways to make it to class... not too late. She notices him out of the corner of her eye and does a slow eye roll as he tip-toes his way in her direction.

“Was that a look of displeasure on your face? Or are you just containing your excitement to see me?”, he whispers into her ear while trying to quietly slither down into his seat, quickly, while the professor has her back turned.

“You are one minute late past our deal, Hongjoong.” She scolds.

“So you will not share your notes with me from today?”, he asks while giving her a pout.

“There is nothing to share. She is still reviewing the content we learned two days ago before starting a new lesson.” She retorts.

“Why did you roll your eyes then?” He questions again, as if his academics are the last thing he cares about.

“Hongjoong- “, she starts. “If there is something that you two would like to share with the class, please come up to the front.” The professor cuts in.

The look of two deer in the headlights is what can be seen from the professor’s viewpoint. With mouths agape and eyes wide, the two whispering chatterboxes were rendered speechless.

The professor continues on, “Please stop whispering behind my back. Also, I need to speak with the two of you after class.” The two of them shake their heads rapidly affirming their professor’s request.

Their class is currently on the topic of children acquiring their mother tongue and how the brain develops as the children learn how to speak or bring attention to their wants and needs as they grow. A topic such as this excites her all the more because it ties into her study abroad research topic. Learning how to speak amidst all of the culture that one’s language is tied to really fascinates her. Seeing as how her major of study in her home country is Linguistics and she took Korean because of the small intimate nature of the class, she has wanted to do and learn so much more.

As the lecture winds downs to a close for this session, Hongjoong becomes more and more anxious about what the professor wants to talk about before letting them go. Then, he hears the professor harp on,

“As for the email I sent earlier today-“, Hongjoong’s ears perk up. “You will see that for the group project you will have two different options to choose from. It can be turned in as a 10-page research paper, or completed as a presentation. Your groups have been chosen for you, by me. Please consult me if you have any questions on the project or the partners that you will be working with.” After the professor gives her parting words to the class, her eyes fall onto the two little songbirds that had her interrupt her lecture earlier.

With a knowing look, they make their way to the front of the class with a downcast gaze. As if they were to be physically reprimanded. “You know that you two are partners for this group project.” The professor starts. “Hongjoong you must be a reliable partner. I set you two up together because I’ve noticed a great partnership between you two throughout the semester. Your partner is also fairing better than you are this term. You can learn a great deal from her, in fact, you can learn quite a bit from each other. I want you to succeed Hongjoong, and I know you can.” The professor softens her gaze and turns to his partner. “She’ll do everything she can to help, won’t you?” She shakes her head ‘yes’ then looks down again. Then the professor continues to finish, “well, that was all I needed to say. Any questions?” The two students shake their head ‘no’ and bid their professor farewell before leaving the class.

“Buddies until the Christmas break?” Hongjoong says as he winks at her.

“Group partners, more like.” She says back to him.

“Wanna talk about the project over lunch?” He asks.

“Ah- that sounds like a really great idea since we’re both free at this time, but...” she trails off, but then picks up again. “Where are your eating? On campus, or off? Just asking because I figured I should check out a few language and culture books to get some foundation on our project. I’ll meet you wherever you are.

His eyebrows raise at her go-getter attitude. “Sure. Meet me at the small Vietnamese spot two blocks down.”

“Got it.” She winks at him as they break apart.

She has her mind filled with countless ways to approach the project, while his is filled with hunger and images of a big flavorful dish filled with meat and vibrantly colored vegetables.

Before aimlessly searching around the library for what she needed, she looked up the language, literature, and culture and linguistic sections of the library. Literature happens to be in the basement, while language, culture, and linguistics just happen to be on the third floor. So, she sets off for the third floor.

Although quiet, the third floor is warm and the ambiance is calm. Compared to the rest of the library, this is the floor that most people like to be on, and she could tell, because there was not a place to sit. However, her journey to this floor was not for studying but a quick search. So she set off. The part of the library she set off to was a little empty, and not as cramped as the other parts but she liked it that way. The first book she pulled from the shelf had to do with children’s speech patterns and babies recognizing sound. Noticing that there was a folded piece of paper sticking out from the top, she flipped to that spot in the book thinking there might be valuable information on that page right from the start. Nothing out of the ordinary was written on the page. No sticky notes, no annotations or drawings, just words. Next, she took to opening up the folded sheet of paper and to her surprise, it read as a simple greetings letter.

A random letter in a random book. What was the point? Was this fate, or was it meant for someone else? She thought it was cute; with the well wishes to stay warm during harsh Korean winters, and the impending embarrassment of the writer, as well as the writer giving themselves a name. She fell for it. She fell hard. Almost immediately she began having romantic notions of trading love letters to someone in a new environment. However, romantic thoughts quickly left her as she thought it could also be a woman, instead of a man. There is nothing indicating the gender of the writer and she honestly feels a little bad for passing such a judgement so quickly. Her train of thought comes to a halt as she feels the buzzing of her phone indicating a text messsage coming through.

🎧 HJ: should i order ahead for you too?

HER: sure, you’re there already?

🎧 HJ: yeah

what do you want?

HER: something mild. not too spicy.

🎧 HJ: got it

when are you coming down?

HER: actually on my way now. see you in a bit.

🎧 HJ: 😉 😉

She rolls her eyes at his latest text. She puts the letter back in the book, skim a few other book titles, take them off the shelves and makes her way over to the check-out counter.

-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+

Now, sitting and eating in the small restaurant they begin talking about why Hongjoong is late all the time, their interests outside of the classroom, and plans for the Christmas break after the project is done.

Hongjoong reaches for one of the books and questions to himself whether she’s started taking notes already because he sees a folded sheet of paper sticking out at the top. While she is busy eating and busying herself with her phone, she doesn’t notice Hongjoong going through the book. Him being as perceptive as he is, notices that it’s a small note signed by a “secret scribe”. Did she know this was here? He asks himself. In fact, taking a closer look at the writing, the tone feels oddly familiar and so does the handwriting. Or maybe he is just thinking too hard about this. Either way, he tucks the note back in its proper place and continues with skimming through the index and other parts of the book.

Hongjoong brings her attention to him by breaking the silence. “Since you have four books, how about I take two to read and you take two?”

“Sounds good.” She responds. After making her choice of books to take, they set up a time to meet, outside of class, to get started on the project.

She makes her way back to the library, while Hongjoong walks through another part of the campus to work on his music. After making it safely to the library, she struggles to find a spot. Settling for the floor in the basement, she sets off to write a letter to the “secret scribe”.

“Dear Secret Scribe (?),

I came upon your letter by chance for a project but for some reason I feel as if I am imposing. As if I was not supposed to read it and respond, but here I am writing to you anyway...

My writing may look odd and the sentence structure may be weird, but it’s because I am a foreign student.

The weather is not too bad so far, however, I am doing my best to stay warm. The change of seasons in South Korea is very beautiful to experience. Not only can you see it and smell it, but you can also sense it. Does that make sense? Anyway, my mid-terms are over, I only had two. Now, I am working towards finals. The final project that I am working on is for my Linguistics class. Actually, I am a Linguistics major. What are you majoring in? Also, are you a man or woman? I am a woman if you were curious.

I truly hope that you are managing to stay warm and stress free as the semester is coming towards an end.

You’ll Be In My Thoughts,

Your... Winter Student... A Winter Dream

P.S. I kind of need to take this book with me for research, but I’ll keep it here for you until we can agree on a place to drop off our letters... Only if you would like to continue this correspondence... Your Choice.”

With that, she leaves her letter in the book and goes up to the third floor and places it back on the shelf that she took it from. Her heart is racing, but she doesn’t know why. He probably will not respond too quickly, she thinks to herself. “You did your part, now let it go”, she tells herself as she makes her way back to her apartment for study and research.

#ateez college!au #my writings: ateez college!au #park seonghwa #kim hongjoong #ateez x mc #park seonghwa x mc #kim hongjoong x mc #ateez x black female mc #ateez x black female #park seonghwa x black female #kim hongjoong x black female #park seonghwa college!au #kim hongjoong college!au

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xtinyaurora · 3 years

Note

Hii ˚‧*♡ॢ˃̶̤̀◡˂̶̤́♡ॢ*‧˚ Can you please do a Ateez reaction When s/o have a weakness for his black hair: (as if you get more nervous with them, you blush more, you stutter when talking to him or you will look at him more) please? Thank you 💖🥺

Ateez reaction: Y/N has a weakness for their black hair

————————————————————————

➼ requested?: yes

➼ genre: fluff

➼ pairing: Ateez x neutral!reader

➼ Word-count: 1,4k+

➼ Warnings: None? Maybe use of pet names and mentions of being hot / sexy, Y/N is really flustered

➼ Note: This is not based on their real behavior or meant to represent real life. This is simply a fan fiction and is only for the purposes of fun, it’s a hobby. Read at your own risk.

➼ A/N note: Sorry for taking so long to upload this. I am a bit stressed out these days, because I am in my exam phase right now. :( Hope you like it tho.

————————————————————————

Park Seonghwa

Your boyfriend was currently cleaning the dorm, you silently watching him from the couch. Of course you offered him some help, but he told you that he’s as good as finished, so there you sat, staring at him for over ten minutes now. To be more specific, you were staring at his freshly dyed hair. The black color made him look more sexy, making you flustered. You didn’t realize that you had your mouth wide open, until your boyfriend chuckled lightly saying „Baby, close your mouth before a fly gets in.” You immediately closed it and started blushing, making the hot male laugh a bit louder. Since it was the exact time he finished his cleaning, he made his way towards you, sitting on the couch and taking you into his arms. „I'm exhausted.“ you still starred at him, not realizing what you were saying „And sexy.” Seonghwa looked at you amused. „Oh, really?” That’s when realization hit you, making you blush even harder then before. Seonghwa of course enjoyed your current state, laughing yet again and kissing your forehead. „You’re cute when you get shy, I should keep this hair color for a bit longer.”

Kim Hongjoong

„A-and then we came b-back here.” You stuttered out, Hongjoong grinning at you. „Uhu. That’s nice, baby.” You gulped, looking at the floor. You knew that you’re as red as a tomato, your cheeks heating up with every passing second. Your boyfriend just looked too good to be true. Not only his outfit was stunning today, but his new hair color. You just loved how he could pull off anything and not only looking incredibly handsome but hot at the same time. „Yea... How about you, Joong. How was your day?” You asked, still looking at the floor. „Oh it was pretty cool, I went out with Yunho. We went to the cafe down the street and I got my hair dyed right after. Do you like it?” You only nodded, answering his question. „Really? How much do you like it?” You looked up, realizing what he was trying to do. „A lot.” He started smiling. „I'm glad that you like it.”

Jeong Yunho

Sweat dripped from his forehead, while he was dancing to the loud music. Since Ateez had a comeback, they all kept practicing all night and day. Your boyfriend dyed his hair back to black this time, making it hard for you to take your eyes off of the tall and handsome male. Of course he noticed how you immediately looked away when he was trying to make eye contact with you or how you stared blushing when he stroke his hand through his hair, pushing it back. God, you loved that look. He knew and he liked it. He stared to smirk to himself, planning what he could do next to get you even more flustered. „Baby, could you hand me my water, please?” said your boyfriend, you immediately getting up and handing it over. „Thank you, can I get a kiss now?” You eyes went wide but of course you did what he asked for, placing a tiny kiss on his soft lips. You wanted to go back to sit on the floor again but Yunho pulled you against his chest, half smiling and half smirking at you. „What’s up my tiny tomato, do you like my new hair color that much?” You got even more embarrassed by that and buried your face into his chest, making him laugh out loudly.

Kang Yeosang

Yeosang was finally the new MC for the music shows. You were more than happy for him, visiting him to support him. You arrived a bit later than planned because of the traffic, so Yeosang was already on stage, doing his job. When you looked at him, standing in the crowd area, you almost got a heart attack. You didn’t know that Yeosang had dyed his hair. The black color really suited him. You were so amazed that you stared at him, mouth a gap, eyes wide open. When Yeosang made eye contact with you and saw your reaction, he couldn’t hold back and stated chuckling a bit but quickly stopped since there where cameras filming him. He tried to focus, but with your flustered state, he couldn’t stop himself from smiling. The others noticed how he started smiling like an idiot, constantly paying his attention to you rather than the cameras. One of the MCs low key addressed him, so Yeosang put back his stoic face, only smiling once in a while. The young boy was going to explode in any minute, not able to cope with your cuteness.

Choi San

„Annnd? Do you like it?” did your boyfriend ask you with a smirk in his face, winking at you. You silently nodded your head, looking at the ground. „Hey, look at me! My face is up here.” did he laugh out, hands touching your cheeks to pull your head up. A smile was now plastered on his face, fingers brushing across your light pink face. „What’s wrong, baby? Why so shy suddenly?” „Can you please stop teasing me? I'm getting even more embarrassed for drooling over a new hair color than just the fact that your way too close to me.” But what can you do, he just looks so good. Sans face lit up even more, his smile getting brighter. „Oh, come on! Don’t tell me you don’t like me being so close to you. I'm your boyfriend! I can be as close as I want to, bunny. And now give me a kiss and show me how much you like my new hair.”

Song Mingi

At first, you thought you would be the flustered one, but after complimenting your boyfriend, he started blushing and giggling. „Thank you, Cupcake. I'm glad that your like it.” You smiled back, reaching out to give him a hug. When you let go, to continue eating the sweets Mingi bought for you two, you noticed how his face started to get red. You immediately started laughing, him hiding his face behind his hands. „What’s wrong, Mingi-ah? Why so shy suddenly?” „I am totally fine! I-I just... I just didn’t excepted you to hug me, that’s all.” You started laughing harder. „What are you talking about, you usually don’t blush when I hug you.” He just shrugged his shoulders, avoiding eye contact with you. You stopped laughing, taking his face into your hands, turning it so he could look at you. „Mingi, you can tell me. What’s wrong?” He let out a sigh. „Do you think Atinys will like it? Like, will they think that I am hot?” Again, a bright smile creeped on your face. He is so adorable. „I am sure they will love it, my dorky baby.”

Jung Wooyoung

„I look hot, don’t I?” said the boy, wiggling his eyebrows. You just rolled your eyes and turned around, trying to hide your blushing face. „Hey! I am talking to you, tomato. Tell me that I look good!” He grabbed your shoulder, turning you around. „Can you leave me alone? You know that I think that you look good, so stop annoying me and let me live my life in peace.” He started grinning. „Of course I know that, but I want to hear it in a full sentence, with no stuttering or looking on the ground. Come on.” You rolled your eyes again. „Agh! Okay, fine. Wooyoung, you look soooo good with black hair! No one would ever be able to look better than you, no matter what color you dye it. You are just too perfect!” You let out a long sigh, cringing a bit from your use of voice. „Are you happy now?” The boy still had a smirk on his face, looking happy, yet satisfied. „More than happy! Thank you, butter cheeks.”

Choi Jongho

The boy couldn’t stop smiling. Your were trying to form a halfway understandable sentence for the past five minutes now. Let’s just say that you did more than fail. „Baby, if you want I can hang up so you can clam down a bit.” Laughed Jongho. „No! I... Uhm... I... want to look at you for a bit more.” Now a light smirk formed on his lips. „Oh? Okay then. But... can you talk to me probably at least? I have to go to bed in a bit, tomorrow will be a tough day.” You blushed while nodding your head. „Sorry.” He now let out a bright chuckle, shaking his head. „You don’t have to be sorry, bumpkin. It’s cute how you get all shy just because of my hair. I am glad that you like it.” Now you were the one smiling at him, not realizing that you were staring at him again. „Ah! If you want you can take a screenshot, so you can stare at me again, after we hang up. Or I can send you some pictures?” Annnd you stared blushing again.

709 notes · View notes

pixieminutes · 4 years

Text

Coming Home | PSH

genre: angst, fluff, mafia!au, dad!seonghwa

members: park seonghwa x reader, kim hongjoong, song mingi, choi jongho

warnings: swearing

06:56

“yesul-ah,” you cooed, lifting the baby out of her crib, walking her to the kitchen with bouncy steps to make her laugh, “time for breakfast!”

you placed your four-month-old baby in your arms, holding the bottle up to her lips. she started sucking as you breathed a sigh of relief, bringing a pillow for her bottle to rest on.

with your now free arm you reached across and turned the tv on. the return of superman.

“he really is a superman dad, isn’t he?” the mc said.

you rolled your eyes.

“of course,” the other mc agreed, “all dad’s are supermans.”

you quickly shut the tv back off, staring down at your daughter.

it had been four months since you found yourself alone in a hospital room, pushing out your baby girl. it was six months before that when you’d left your boyfriend with a note. he hadn’t come for you, just as you’d told him to, so you left it at that.

seonghwa was the love of your life. you were sure of that. you knew that yesul would never have a dad as you would never find someone else as great as seonghwa.

you often wondered what seonghwa would have been like as a dad. perfect, probably. he does the cleaning and the cooking and he loves children. but you moved away for your own good. or, at least, that’s what you told yourself.

but getting less than six hours of sleep every night, facing every illness and infant problem alone for the past four months, you often had to remind yourself of that.

“come on, yesul, we need to go shopping today!” you cooed, putting the bottle back on the side and carrying your baby up to her nursery.

you made sure she was burped, washed, dressed and entertained before making your own way to the bathroom and having a shower of your own.

“should mummy put make-up on today?” you asked, mostly talking to yourself.

yesul gurgled and you nodded.

“a little bit. i’m not that dirty.��

07:25

“finally,” you said, shutting the door behind you, “we’re out. and we’re going to the supermarket!”

yesul giggled, waving her arms about as you pushed her stroller down the street.

“let’s go,” you whispered so she could still hear your voice as you walked into the supermarket.

you walked up and down the aisles, throwing your shopping into the underneath part of your babies stroller as you went around.

suddenly, yesul let out a loud whine.

you frowned, mimicking her facial expression, “what? what is it?”

you stopped by the side of the aisle, pulling your baby out the stroller and cuddling her to your chest, bouncing her.

“y/n?”

your heard flicked up in front of you, before immediately flicking back down.

“y/n... is that you?” hongjoong asked.

you looked up at him before laughing nervously, “me?”

“yeah. y/n, is that...”

“sorry, that’s not me,” you said, feigning innocence, “my name’s not y/n. if you’ll excuse me, this one’s being a bit fussy.”

you placed yesul back in her stroller, walking out the aisle to avoid the leader of the mafia group your ex-boyfriend worked for.

but he wasn’t stupid. kim hongjoong had met enough people feigning innocence to know what it looked like.

and yesul looking like the mirror image of her dad didn’t help, either.

08:59

“park seonghwa, wake up,” hongjoong said, pulling the duvet off from his friend’s body.

seonghwa just whined, rolling over so his back was to hongjoong.

“wake up! right now!”

“fine, fine, napoleon complex,” seonghwa said, muttering his last words as hongjoong walked out the room.

“i can hear you perfectly fine, pretty boy!” hongjoong shouted, “now come here, i got breakfast.”

“ooh breakfast,” mingi said.

“not you. i need seonghwa and only seonghwa right now,” hongjoong said, pointing at one of the taller members of atz.

seonghwa furrowed his eyebrows, his eyeline following his leader until the short man was gone from view. he wiped his face with his hands, walking over to the mirror and ruffling and patting his hair until it was almost presentable. he pulled on a t-shirt and slumped down to the kitchen.

“toasties?” seonghwa asked, “did you go to isaac toast?”

hongjoong nodded, watching as seonghwa sat down and took a bite of the hot sandwich.

“why? it’s so expensive,” he said with his mouth full, “and so good, oh my life.”

“you have a baby.”

“huh?”

seonghwa dropped the toast back onto the plate, staring up at hongjoong.

“with who?!” seonghwa exclaimed.

of course, you were his only long-term partner, but he couldn’t deny that in the process of getting over you, there were many others.

“who do you think?”

“hongjoong...” seonghwa said, his voice quiet, “please tell me. if it’s not—”

“y/n?”

“if it’s not y/n i’ll go insane,” seonghwa said, “you know that.”

“it’s your lucky day then, isn’t it,” hongjoong said, sighing, “she pretended it wasn’t her, but it obviously was.”

“is she...” seonghwa trailed off before mimicking a baby bump on his stomach, “because that would mean... that it... it’s not mine.”

hongjoong shook his head, “no i saw the baby. it’s yours, seonghwa.”

seonghwa sat in silence for a moment, “is it...”

“it’s a girl, i’m guessing, because she was wearing a dress,” hongjoong said, “she was being kinda fussy but as soon as y/n picked her up she was fine. she’s your twin, seonghwa. especially your nose. has a little bit of hair upon her head as well.”

“did she look at you? the baby?” seonghwa asked.

hongjoong nodded, “her eyes are big. sparkly. they look quite a lot like yours.”

“how was y/n?” seonghwa asked, tears springing to his eyes as he said your name.

it’d been a while since he last said it. you’d left just over a year ago and seonghwa spent half of that time crying about you, a quarter of that time getting with other people and another quarter denying anything at all.

and now this.

“well she was denying her own name,” hongjoong shrugged, “but i guess that’s cause she recognised me.”

seonghwa chuckled, of course you did. you always told seonghwa about how you would be the one to break hongjoong’s hard exterior, and you sure tried whenever you came round. you’d joke and laugh and hug him, and sometimes he did smile and laugh. your happiness was just infectious.

“she looks alright,” hongjoong said, “she only had a little bit of make-up on, and she looked tired when she consoled the baby. but i guess that’s what it’s like having a baby.”

“this might be so wrong but...” seonghwa trailed off, “no. i can’t.”

“i’ve already found her location,” hongjoong said, “jongho is currently—”

“hyung. is this seonghwa’s baby?!” jongho exclaimed.

“name?” hongjoong asked, ignoring jongho’s question.

“park yesul,” jongho said, putting the freshly printed files on the table between hongjoong and seonghwa, “she’s four months old. born february 12th, 2020.”

“blood type o,” hongjoong read, “aquarius. 16 inches long at birth, weighed 4 pounds exactly.”

“she was tiny,” seonghwa breathed.

“it’s not too late, seonghwa. she’s only four months old,” hongjoong said, “you can still be a part of her life.”

seonghwa looked into hongjoong’s eyes. he was being truthful. hongjoong was often hard to read, but seongwha knew when he was lying, there was a glint in his eyes whenever he told a fib.

“what if there’s someone else?” seonghwa asked.

“even if there is, he’s not yesul’s dad, is he?” hongjoong said, “you are.”

“you really think y/n would get ‘someone else’?” jongho asked in a mocking tone, “she left because she was pregnant with your baby, not because she didn’t love you anymore.”

“i– i don’t understand why she’d leave. i told her i wanted kids!” seonghwa cried.

“you’re part of a mafia group.”

“but—” seonghwa stopped himself, “oh.”

“i just felt i had to tell you,” hongjoong said, standing up, “i’m sorry if it’s put you in a difficult position.”

“no, no,” seonghwa said slowly, shaking his head, “no... i’m– yeah, yeah it’s fine.”

hongjoong nodded, tapping jongho’s shoulder, indicating for the pair of them to leave seongwha alone.

the pair walked out the kitchen as seonghwa’s eyes fluttered over the piece of paper in front of him.

“park yesul,” he smiled, “she kept my name.”

“16 inches,” he whispered, trying to space out with his hands what 16 inches looked like, “mini. and only 4 pounds.”

he sighed, looking up to the doorway, “hongjoong?! do you still have that address?!”

13:04

“coming!”

you placed yesul on her play mat, jogging to the front door.

you gasped, quickly shutting the door again.

“no!” he exclaimed, shoving his foot in between the door and the frame, “please, y/n, i know.”

you opened the door again, slowly, with a sigh, “you work quickly, huh.”

“i just woke up and hongjoong told me everything,” seonghwa shrugged.

“did he follow me home?” you asked, “i was so—”

“no, no,” seonghwa shook his head, “jongho was...”

“ah...” you nodded, you were all too aware of the scary amount of power jongho had over every file ever.

it was silent for a moment before you sighed.

“seonghwa, what do you want?” you asked, “why are you here?”

“i- i wanted to see you,” he said, “and her. y/n, i miss you. i want to make this work.”

“seonghwa, i can’t just—”

“i understand. i’m in a mafia group, that’s fucking terrifying—”

“language,” you scolded, “there’s a baby.”

seonghwa smiled sheepishly, “sorry.”

“seonghwa...” you trailed off, “look, this is too sudden. i can’t just let you in immediately.”

seonghwa nodded, “i understand.”

“but that’s not a no, okay?” you sighed, “but this is too much.”

D+9, 15:59

“d-do...” you stopped, “do you want to come in?”

seonghwa had been in contact almost every day since, and you’d been in contact as well. you missed seonghwa. you missed him so much. and every time you sent him a photo of yesul, it made it so clear how much you were ready for her to have a dad, to have seonghwa back.

seonghwa nodded, “yes. yes, yes, yes.”

you turned around, scooping yesul off the floor on your way to the kitchen, placing her in her high chair as you heard seonghwa close the front door and follow you in.

“do you want some tea?” you asked, turning around as you filled the kettle.

your ex-boyfriend didn’t reply, making you turn around to urge a reply, but he wasn’t looking at you.

“hi,” he whispered, sitting on the chair beside yesul’s high chair, “yesul, right?”

yesul smiled slightly as seonghwa tickled her cheek.

“seonghwa, look,” you sighed, “just... tell me what you want, okay?”

you sat down opposite seonghwa as he looked from you to yesul, from yesul to you.

“i want to be here,” he sighed, “y/n, i still love you, okay? and when hongjoong said i had a baby, all i could picture was you and me with one, together. i’m confused and a little bit hurt that you didn’t tell me, but i understand. but... i also hope you could change your mind.”

“seonghwa, you’re in a mafia group,” you cried, “of course i still love you. you’re all i’ve thought about since the day i left. i’ve regretted that decision so badly, yet at the same time, when i look at yesul, i understand why.”

seonghwa nodded, looking to the baby as she flicked her toy around, “me too.”

you sighed, watching seonghwa’s loving eyes. yesul was a shy baby as well, you were shocked that she was trusting seonghwa this easily.

“i’m fine with you being in her life, but i’m so scared seonghwa,” you said, your voice quiet, as though trying not to let her hear, “i can’t count the amount of times i’ve come into contact with other mafia groups because they knew me. what’s that like with a baby as well?!”

“i’ll protect you,” seonghwa said, facing you again, “i promise, y/n. i’ll keep you hidden, i’ll stay at home, i’ll do whatever it takes, okay?”

you sighed.

“why are you so reluctant to trust me?”

“i’m not,” you said, shaking your head, “i just... why? why do you want this so badly? that- that you’re willing to stay at home or keep us a secret.”

“because...” seonghwa stalled, he was so caught off guard, “because i love you, y/n? and that’s what i’d do for you. and– and look at her.”

seonghwa sighed as he looked back to his daughter. his own daughter. he reached out his hand and she gripped onto his finger, giggling as he smiled, “she’s so beautiful. she’s just... she’s precious, y/n and she’s ours.”

you nodded, “she is undeniably yours.”

“and yours,” he smiled, “look at her smile.”

you laughed, “seonghwa, she doesn’t have any teeth!”

“it’s there!” he exclaimed, laughing, “look!”

you shook your head, laughing as he made yesul grin.

“do you like her name?”

“park yesul,” seonghwa spoke, looking back to you, “i love it. our art.”

you nodded, “so... where does this put us?”

“are you saying you’ll come back to me?” seonghwa asked.

“well you could move in here? it’s not much...”

seonghwa chuckled, reached across and taking your hand, “i’ll buy us a house. just for the three of us.”

“god, i wasn’t prepared for this when i woke up this morning.”

“you think i was?”

you chuckled as seonghwa smiled, rubbing the back of your hand with his thumb.

“i’ll protect you,” he said, “i promise.”

“go on then,” you said.

“hmm?”

“greet your daughter. you’ve been very half-assed so far. you have a whole year to catch up on if you include the pregnancy.”

seonghwa smiled, pulling yesul out her high chair and cuddling her into his arms.

“here,” you said, “you have to support her head and her bum. head more important.”

he laid the baby on his forearm, holding her head in his hand.

“hi yesul,” he cooed, “it’s me. daddy.”

yesul gurgled and giggled, biting her fingers.

“she’s beautiful,” he said, tears appearing in his eyes, “i can’t believe she’s mine.”

you smiled, kissing his forehead, “thank you for coming home.”

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closer-stars · 3 years

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Heart of Depth (4)

Member: Yeosang Genre: Action, Slice of Life, Fantasy, Fluff, a little tension. Genshin Inspired AU Word Count: ~5k Requested: Sort of yeah Content: Yeosang x MC development. More world building. Food stuff. some history, some typical genshin shenanigans. Mild Violence. Mentions of death Note: Surprise lol. I’ve been working on this fic at the same time as gut feeling hence the speedy posting, part 5 to be posted soon. Network: @ateezlovenet Tag list: @barsformars @miniyeo @jeongyunhoed @yeekies @yeotlny @frankenstein852 @shinyddeonghwa @prodbyteez @yeochikin @yeocult @harubirus

Part 3

Yeosang’s friend, Hongjoong, arrives at your shop today. He waits for you and Wooyoung patiently by the door. Well, you assume it’s Hongjoong based on his mannerisms. He didn’t seem like the men Wooyoung had to fight the night before. The two of you approach your shop carefully: the grip you have on your keys were tight, Wooyoung’s stance was low enough to not get weird glances but low enough to give him enough force to jump should it not be him.

The male notices the two of you and greets you politely. “Hello, I’m Kim Hongjoong, Kang told me about your need for assistance.” The introduction puts your guards down. You remember Yeosang’s description of the male, around Wooyoung’s height, eyes that seem inquisitive, with wavy hair that seem to frame his face. If none of these events had happened, you would’ve assumed he was a model with how he carried himself.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” You introduce yourself and Wooyoung, as you open the shop for the day. Not even a few minutes after, people start pouring into your shop-- some of them with obvious relief on their features. They speak of their worries of the shop having closed down or you and Wooyoung not doing alright. All of which are shut down with reassurances. As the three of you go about with the orders and other needed rituals, you teach Hongjoong the ins and outs of your shop, what to press to make certain types of coffee, how to make foamed milk and so on. “Oh and if you want to create any dishes, feel free to do so. Some of Wooyoung’s creations are on the menu as well.”

Throughout the day, the three of you try to get to know each other more, even asking Hongjoong for tidbits about who Yeosang and San really are and who he really is. He answers simply about himself, a Dendro holder, whose blood is similar to that of San’s. “So how old are you?” Wooyoung asks.

“Younger than San, older than you.” It was a simple answer but enough to give the two of you an idea of how long he has walked the earth. It also explains his oddly shaped pupils but perhaps a detailed rundown of his lineage is for another day.

Wooyoung returns to where the two of you are, just in time to get the gist of the conversation as you guide Hongjoong through making an iced macchiato. “Yeah and most of the earnings made from those dishes go to you.” He eggs the other male on with a cheeky grin on his face. Hongjoong, catching onto his antics, releases a light laugh after having made enough milk foam for the order.

“I’ll consider that.” You let Hongjoong pour the order into a plastic cup for the customer. You don’t miss the lingering gazes from the women as well. Maybe having an attractive barista could help with the sales.

--------

You were back running business as usual. Only since that incident, you had to start closing a little earlier than usual. You had to write on your small board that you’ll only be able to be open until 5PM every day for the next few weeks due to personal reasons. Wooyoung spends the rest of the day in the studio, though he gets creative with the journey there-- using various train lines, or even walking through different streets just to make sure he doesn’t become predictable from the Abyss. He was more worried for you though. Hongjoong as well, walks with you usually: either walking the two of you to your apartment or elsewhere, just for safety. It was part of the agreement after all.

For today the shop has to close early, at least he can be reassured that you’ll be safe with Yeosang for tonight. “Damn, you really dressed up for tonight huh?” Wooyoung muses as he leans against the counter. Hongjoong lingers around Wooyoung’s side. For the entire day, Wooyoung gave the older male a rundown of your relationship with Yeosang-- at least the parts you forgot to add, which generally was the romantic aspect.

To be fair, you did put a little more effort today hoping that Wooyoung wouldn’t notice unless you wanted to be teased. Your blouse, though it can be easily wrinkled, hangs on your body well. It’s also one of your favorites simply for how it feels cool to the touch. You were wearing slacks as well, not your usuals for comfort and practicality but today, knowing Yeosang’s preferences when it comes to dates, it was better to just dress up. “Shush.” You chide him, wrinkling your nose at his teasings. “I know he’s seen me in just shorts or joggers when I’m working but considering it’s a date…” Until now, whenever you say that you’re going on a date with him, your heart beats a little faster. “I figured I might as well... “

The mischievous glint in Wooyoung’s eyes softens just a bit as he snickers at how flustered you look. “Don’t worry about it too much, the two of you have really good dynamics. Guess you could say there’s a spark” He rests against his elbows this time. The pun doesn’t go unnoticed by Hongjoong. “Have you even seen how he looks at you? That guy’s really smitten.” There was also a hint of curiosity behind the soft gaze Yeosang carries for you. He wonders what it is, but if there’s anything being an electro user tells him, it’s patience. “Besides, your shop has garnered a bunch of loyal customers now. They don’t mind the early close especially for personal reasons. At least have fun tonight.”

You look at the clock. It won’t be long until he picks you up from the shop then. “You already know how to lock up this place right?” It won’t be long either until Wooyoung has to head to the studio.

“Of course. The keys are with me and the extra set of keys are at home.” He rolls his eyes in jest at your concern. “Do you have Regalia with you?” He returns.

Regalia’s the name of the bracelet you’ve been wearing since day one of living with Wooyoung’s family. One of the last few things you’ve kept from your family that he’s aware of. He doesn’t usually mind you not wearing it during work but with the recent events, you can only assume this is for your peace of mind. “Yup.” You raise your wrist to his view, and he sees the cool toned beads adorn and accentuate the silver charm that rests just above where your pulse is.

Your vision was peaking under your top, just by your waist, not wanting to bring too much attention to your capabilities but still wanting to stay on the safe side. Underneath the calm facade, lies the same person who’s still wary of everything since then. A figure catches his eye by the door. It’s Yeosang, this time wearing a cream blazer under a simple printed white shirt and dark gray pants and ankle boots. He always manages to make you feel a tad bit underdressed with his fashion sense. You envy Wooyoung’s nonchalance to the fashion differences, then again, Wooyoung’s been confident in his own style. That’s what got him to where he is now.

Just as you were about to ask Wooyoung a question, he beats you to it. “Yes, you look fine. Now go and have your date.” He shooes you off with a wave of his hand. You shoot him a look of mild annoyance for his ability to see through your facade. So with that done, you grab your things on top of the counter and wave him goodbye.

“Call me when something comes up okay?”

He says nothing but shoots you an okay sign, making sure you focus on the man who’s been waiting for you like a lovesick puppy by the door.

Just as you step out of the shop, you’re greeted by a warm smile from him. It’s interesting how that smile made him look younger when he’s already thousands of years older than you. It just comes with the whole Archon responsibility, you suppose. As you approach him, he hands you a bouquet of various flowers-- peeking above the flowers, you see his cheeks bloom into an endearing pink.

“Yeosang what’s this for?” You ask, the wrapped flowers in your hands has you dumbfounded. You weren’t sure if it was a double peonies but you’ve definitely seen this before somehow. You knew that this was a rarity but how he managed to acquire them at the height of their beauty at this time of the year was a feat for you. “What is this?” A white flower, not yet in full bloom, is surrounded by simple greens and hyacinths. You gaze at them for a moment, before returning your gaze to the man in front of you.

The tips of his ears shine bright pink, a stark contrast to his black-blue hair. “I thought you might appreciate another type of flower to be in your shop.” You can’t turn down this gift. Double peonies have been something you would usually see online. To know that these are real ones and they’re in your hands, it was truly an experience. “Neve Jewel.” He answers your question softly

You look at him for a moment, shocked at how he got this flower for you. “How often should I water them?” You ask as you try to look for a vase or a spare pot that you would plant them in for the time being in your shop. You’d love to bring home a sapling of this down the line.

“Every three days.” He says after clearing his throat. If he didn’t, he would’ve stuttered through the tip. The look of pure glee in your eyes made him think that getting you the flowers was a good decision, at least it was good enough to make his chest feel warm. As you look through the pots in your shop, you realize there’s no space for them: looks like you’ll have to carry them for the entirety of the date.

He offers you the crook of his arm, for you to hold onto for the rest of the date. “So what’s the plan for tonight?” You ask as you gently hold onto his arm as he offered. The night was still young and there was so much they could do and for all you know he might pull more surprises.

“Well, for starters, you have the freedom to choose what we eat tonight. I figure it’s only fair to let you choose this time as it was my choice last time.” That’s right, you remember the last restaurant being expensive and him being able to pay with ease. A small part of you wonders if he could cover your further studies or help with the studio Wooyoung also works in.

The power to choose makes you hum in thought. Truthfully the decisions were countless. “How about pizza and pasta? I know a place you might like.” A short pause. “Well, we can look at the menu and see if you like it, if not we go elsewhere.” You offer.

You hate to admit that ever since knowing Yeosang’s the Archon, you started seeing him in a slightly different light. Maybe it’s your insecurities? Wondering who else did he love before you. Was it your jealousy? Wanting to know what he knows about this world and perhaps beyond-- along with his financial security. It can’t be helped, there have been times where you gave up something you eyed for more important things. Living on your own isn’t easy but at least you work at your own pace.

“Something on your mind?” Yeosang asks softly. He doesn’t want anyone listening in on them as he starts noticing fleeting glances at either you or him. It didn’t take much for him to know that your thoughts were running again. Your hand felt loose in his arm, and your footsteps felt like they were floating. It was funny to him how you reminded him of them yet still be your own person.

“Ah?” You hummed, blinking a few times to get back to reality. “Nothing too pressing, just curiosity over how life has been for you since Day 1.” You admit. You know of their existence: of Archons that bestow these visions, of beings that are half human, half something, or even not entirely human that walk with you. To be in their presence though, is another topic entirely. “Along with the chances of meeting the likes of your kind.”

He flashes a small smile at your honesty. “I see. All of which are understandable thoughts. I suppose I can tell you a few stories over dinner.” He promises. There’s something comforting in how he carries no hint of resentment, but it leads to more curiosity of what he has buried in all these years. “If time still permits today, I’ll show you some places that hold significance to me that people nowadays do not know of.”

“You say a lot of promises, Yeosang.” You note teasingly. As you do so, you gesture to the restaurant that you had set your eyes (and stomach) on. “Check out their menu first?”

He looks at the restaurant and chuckles. “My dear, San always pesters me about this place. I don’t eat here as often as he does but trust me, I have no issues with tonight’s choice.” He would come here often for San’s favorite especially after a long night of dealing with awry beings that try to wreck havoc. It’s enough to get him through a few hours until he crashes.

His words reassure you and thus, the two of you enter the premises, finding comfort in a booth, away from any eyes that could wander. After the orders have been made, you were left alone with him once more. From your place, you could watch people walk past the restaurant on one side, while the cars zoom past on the other. Yeosang lets you look around for a moment before he starts telling you some of his stories. “So which one would you like to know about?”

He answers your questions to the best of his ability. Yes, even if people try to recreate the food from the past, it’s still not the same, not even with the same ingredients, things just naturally changes over time and he has come to accept that. His current favorite is fried chicken though, even better if it’s the half-half type. He tells you about a plot of raised land on the other side of the river. You weren’t aware of this story: how that was initially something like a mountain only for him to flatten it with the force of water after an immortal being thought they were greater than the heavens that made them. He admits that the immortal was a dear friend of his who had changed as time passed them by. A god of earthquakes, he tells you. “So with that in mind, it’s impossible to fully wipe out any archon or immortal being.” Your inquisitive and sharp mind warms his heart. Humanity’s curiosity is their greatest downfall. Yet, this is what pushes beings like him to protect you and your kind. It’s what has kept your species going.

“Yes and no. This dear friend of mine, he can’t..” he trails off as he tries to find the right word, tilting his head in thought. “His material body cannot come back but his essence lives on. It explains the tremors we feel occasionally.” Some gods are forgotten as well, buried deep in the oceans he rules in where only the darkest parts of humanity’s consciousness can only remember. Yet from time to time, occurrences happen that tell him that there are people that still remember. Fortunately, before the discussion gets any depressing, the food arrives and he takes this chance to know more about you and anything you’re curious about with these flowers that rest on your lap.

He asks you about the latest social networking apps, he has the basics of where most people are but the other apps that entertain certain niches intrigue him. Though you didn’t have all the answers, he was sure he’d leave this restaurant knowing more than before. He finds out that your passion for baking and making different types of coffee came after you saw Wooyoung struggle juggling his dance team and studies. The daily expenses of buying coffee eventually build up over time so you take matters into your own hands. Now, you’ve got a shop up and running and the rest is pretty much history. He respects you for that. The Archon also realizes that perhaps San was right with this restaurant. Another restaurant to add to his options in the days to come.

The rest of the dinner goes well, lasting for two hours before the two of you decide to leave and walk around somewhere quiet. Somewhere that the two of you could get away from the constant bustle of modern life.

The walk to the quieter side of the city was a fruitful one. The conversation between the two of you never stops as each of you try to understand each other-- especially with you trying to understand his roots along with his riches. “So, you being.. An archon.. Is that how you were able to get that apartment?” You understand that he’s not quite immortal, having the ability to die as well but he does have the ability to live longer than most. You learned that gods can die, but deaths caused by humans have resulted in violent natural happenings.

“Yes and no.” He answers with a slight tilt of his lips. “Some of the objects from the historical collection are mine but I had to pull some legal strings to make the public think it’s from someone else, and for the stockholders to continue funding the museum. Some of them have been bought and sold through me to older gods and Archons who have passed on, some archaic family clans as well and so on.” He hints towards other groups with money that have helped fund his museum and keep them safe, though through less than morally ethical means. Simply put, the museum has helped him amass a big fortune with one part going to his anonymous safety for reasons and the other parts going to other necessities of the community around him.

Something stirs in you to explain something to him. “I suppose I owe you a story as well.” You admit softly. You start to tell him about your family life, how you grew up in a family that was passionate about their jobs: your father, a historian while your mother was a fairly known ceramist who also had a passion for what your father pursued. It’s through the attempts of recreating the pottery of the past that made their names fairly well known in those days-- also making you have a keen interest and skill in the history and the arts. Your father came across certain writings, unfamiliar to the academe but familiar to those who were interested in the taboo. He and your mother got too close, from what you understood. The pursuit of making connections and knowledge cost them their life. They made sure you were safe from everything, keeping you hidden from the perpetrators.

Wooyoung’s parents were close to yours, it took forever in a child's mind before they found you, hiding in a closet with the Regalia in your small hands. Once they found you, they made sure you didn’t see the aftermath. Their urns rest in a quiet columbarium out of town. Since then, you grew up with Wooyoung’s family. It’s not the same as having your actual parents grow with you but they did their best to step into their roles for you and for Wooyoung. “It’s been years, and I’ve learned to cope with the absence so please, don’t worry about me.” You reassure him. You’ve been so accustomed, so annoyed with the looks of pity given to you by others who know this story-- which are usually by word of mouth.

He lets his eyes wander around the scenery in front of him. The way the lights bounce against the water, the quiet hum of people milling about by the water. His eyes catch sight of a small family letting their kids play about by the water. The way you talk about your family makes him wonder how you were like when you were younger. The you he knows now is different from the you Wooyoung has known since he was a child. You don’t step into the same river but water always passes where it came from. Simply put, you are still you. Heavens be damned, because he’s enamored by you.

As you tell your stories, your eyes catch a glimpse of the same family. There’s something in your chest that twists that you cast your eyes downward. The flowers were still in your arms, you didn’t want to leave it in the stale air of the car.

He sees you look down at the flowers, your fingers fiddling with the wrapping and some of the petals. “Feel free to ask questions about them, my dear.”

Giving you that green light to ask immediately had you talking. “Okay, first question, How? I thought this didn’t exist anymore?” You remember the first dinner you had with him, how he bought a painting of the said flower and told you how rare it was. So how did he manage to get an actual one?

He finds a bench, away from people that were there for perhaps the same reasons as the two of you. He pats the spot next to him for you to sit down as well to which you oblige. Once you do so, he looks up at the sky, seeing the faint shimmers of the stars above. The waters will continue to move to a near unrecognizable state yet the stars no matter how much they move, they still look the same. The man next to you tries to figure out his words, but eventually he just decides to say it plainly. “I had the same thoughts as you, about its existence. San was the one who notified me of its reemergence. He found it growing in the museum’s garden, in full bloom every night.”

You stare at the lone blooming flower in your hands, wondering if there’s more in the garden, but one question suddenly nags at you. “Why did you give it to me when you’re heavily attached to this flower?” You were flattered, you can’t deny that-- a rare flower from someone who has been fluttering your heart? That was a unique way to be courted Yet, the lapse in thought bothers you, a rare flower that he obviously holds dear to him, given to you? What made him think of this?

“They were someone dear to me as well.” He starts. His voice takes on a more sober tone, making sure you were comfortable leaning on his shoulder. “A dear immortal as well, just like San and I.” It takes a few moments of silence for you to understand the gravity of their relationship. “They were someone well loved by the people, taught them how to handle resources on an economic point of view with other regions, taught them handiwork beyond that of warfare, a lot of things that were out of my field to put it simply..” He has already accepted and forgiven himself of his shortcomings to become someone like them at that time. “Their favorite flower is this, my love.” He says, his fingers fiddle with the edge of its wrapper. “Everyone associated it with them.” Despite the harsh cold that ice gives, it was also a time for trust. When it was too cold, they’d make shelter out of ice and various twigs and fur. If it was too hot, they provided them with cool winds. It’s why the Neve Jewel glows as such, depending on the season.

“Unfortunately, I couldn’t protect them at their time of death.” His eyes stay still at the river that quietly flows past them. “Their last wish to me was to make sure the people survive the journey. Weird isn’t it? The god of water protecting the followers of Ice.” He rests his temple against yours. “Eventually after their passing, Neve Jewels ceased to exist. Until you came along.”

“Yeosang?”

“Mm?”

“What if I’m not them?”

“Yeosang, you know you need to be prepared to accept the fact they might not be your previous lover.”

It’s a question he’s considered since he met you. He admits, it wasn’t easy to consider accepting that you might not return. He remembers the concern in San’s face when he was still so hopeful.

“Of course, grief never leaves you. It always stays with you, you eventually learn how to live with it.” He tips his head in thought, acknowledging the weight of the concern.

You didn’t want to cry here: not when the date was going so well. A soft chuckle leaves your lips to loosen up the tight feeling in your chest. “Mhm, I guess so.” It’s a half hearted answer you have to admit but it was better than letting the silence cue the tears.

��But if you let me, I’ll still love you the same.”

A deep breath loosens the pulsating pain in your head from the unshed tears. “I guess life does work weirdly.” You add under your breath, leaning against his shoulder as you fiddle with the wrapping of the gifted flower.

He readjusts himself to make sure you don’t get uncomfortable. There’s something in your words that tells him, it would be better to shift the topic. “I’m a little disheartened that i never got to tour you around the museum but that’s alright, one of these days, I’ll bring you around, show you my favorite works and tell you some stories behind them.”

“I’d like that, sounds like you got a lot you’d like to share too.” You muse softly, taking in the scent of nature and him.

“I catch you lingering by the entrance sometimes.” Even though he has invited you and Wooyoung to stay in the museum’s offices with him for the sake of safety, you’d just linger by the souvenirs. You remember Wooyoung proposing the idea of having a small shop next to the souvenirs, but you shot it down. It’s not because you don’t think it’ll do well but because who else will manage the shop? Hongjoong’s a good candidate but until you’re certain he’ll stay after this mess.

With how everything is going, you wonder if he finds time to rest. “Please, you’ve got a lot on your plate. I’d rather not add to that, Yeosang.” You say with a breathy laugh of embarrassment.

“You know that I don’t mind your presence.” He’s been spending his hours with you after work for the past few months. “I wouldn’t have asked you on a date, if I did mind.” He tilts your chin gently to look at him.

His eyes, holy shit, you could drown in how they look: shades of blue with hints of green and streaks of white. The ocean resides in this man and you’d be damned if you didn’t feel yourself melt in his touch. “If it still isn’t obvious, my dear, I would like to ask you, if you are willing to be my lover?”

Something flashes at the corner of your eye, and it’s coming straight at you.

#my writings #yeosang fanfic #yeosang series #ateez series #ateez scenarios #ateez fanfic #ateez fanfiction #ateez au #ateez x reader #yeosang x reader #imagine this part with the previous part #too much would have happened in one chapter and i didn't want that

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skrrts · 1 month

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cut(e) like a diamond (oneshot) mature!

✧ fem!reader x kim hongjoong & park seonghwa ✧ genre: non idol, mature, suggestive, complicated relationships, drama ✧ word count: 14k ✧ warnings: paid companionship escorts, adult language, drinking, gentle chin grabbing, deep kissing, playful touches, flirting, nicknames (hun/honey, pretty one), matz flirting & kissing for the job, selfish!hwa, naive mc, she/her for mc, playing with emotions, sex mention, no smut, minors dni

Treasure is a high-class escort agency renowned for its wealthy clientele, glamorous location, and professional work environment. Their elite escorts enjoy financial security and are protected from clients who forget they are paying for companionship, not other pleasures. You quickly make it through the rigorous casting process. No one expected your feisty nature to struggle so much with staying sweet while instructing a client on proper behavior. Fortunately, the two top escorts at Treasure have taken a keen interest in ensuring you don’t lose your job just yet. While Seonghwa only cares about success and fun, Hongjoong seems to care about you.

a/n: i have written a lot of fluff lately & was in the mood to go for something more flirty. i admit this piece turned out to be much longer and plot-ish than intended. please make sure to read all the warnings, it's very different from my usual work and the pace is not perfect 🐿️

The clicking sound of your heels almost drove you insane as you threw your pouch on the free spot next to you, falling onto the luxurious white couch in one of the corners of the ‘get to know’ rooms, intended to give the client and escort a chance to explore their chemistry before final bookings were made. The escort received a fee, certainly smaller than what an actual booking would offer but it was still at least about what any part-time job would make within two weeks. The goal of everyone here was to have a fixed clientele, names who came to return only for you, and with that eventually, willingness to pay more combined with gifts that were all yours whereas a part of the payment went to the agency.

Treasure was the dream of dreams to many, the agency suited in one of the most luxurious hotel buildings in the city, taking several floors and the furniture and interior designed by big names. It was a place for lonely millionaires and future heirs alike, seeking company without the fear of waking rumors of an affair or blackmailing. Thanks to the incredibly difficult way in, the chances for a bad apple to risk the establishment's good name were beyond low.

In theory, there was no reason for them to worry about you. The background check had been perfect, really. A photography major student, incredibly good-looking and with good manners, from a family while not rich, being respectable and most of all, former teen star of the national gymnastics team.

They joked how you made it through the four-week-long casting almost too flawlessly but the issues were showing now. Two weeks in and this was your fifth possible client, a handsome man with a good name looking for somebody who would accompany him to expensive dinners and boring art exhibitions but just like the ones before, his way of talking was such a turn-off, the way his eyes kept slipping.

Of course, you had been aware of the truth. While you literally signed a contract agreeing there never would be any sexual endeavors with any client, it was part of the job to feed just a little into their imagination but somehow, this turned out to be harder than expected. If you did not find at least one client by the end of the month, that would be it. The top escorts had around fifteen clients and you wondered how they managed to meet with each of them giving them this unique feeling.

Maybe it had been stupid, for you to think that being a former gymnastics athlete knew how to portray something for an act of a few hours.

“Bad apple again?” Yeosang’s voice led you to look up but you relaxed back into the comfortable seating right away. “Something like that…”

Yeosang only started to work here a few months before you but he already was considered quite popular. Most escorts preferred to stay for themselves, not necessarily because they thought of each other as rivals but much more because most led a rather normal life outside of this, the least your colleagues knew, the better. Yeosang had been quite open, he welcomed you and helped you a little to settle down, offered advice and an open ear.

“He suddenly leaned in and touched my cheek, I guess I just did not expect that meet and greets would mean they get touchy right away. It was unexpected and I slapped him,” you winced, remembering his face, the moment he stood up, yelled and left. The manager’s expressions when you managed to chase away yet another client.

“You are feisty, I am sure they had an idea when they offered you the contract,” Yeosang replied and crossed his legs, a glass in his hands as he listened to you. It was true, they noted how they enjoyed you were confident, saying Treasure was looking to expand on personalities a little. In fact, it was an agency mostly known for its male talents, only a few other women made themselves a name.

“I only have one more week to get any customer. I was not scheduled in for the last week,” you sighed and looked over to him. It was a simple system: the top tier clients were given choices first, if none of the new possible clients interested them while having open spots, the others got their chance and those nobodies or clients with tricky occupations were often the only ones available to the newbies.

“Don’t overthink it. I would say you are too tense, get home and relax a little. Your next one is scheduled in two days, yeah? I’d say, go shopping, think of your next one like a date. That really helped my nerves when I met my first client.”

You gave him a long gaze, maybe he was right and you needed to get a feel for balance, and be yourself while still acting professional without for them to know it. “I will try that. Thank you Yeosang.” He offered you a smile and raised his drink in a toast to you.

You did not bother to change into your casual clothes, instead only replaced the heels with your sneakers as you pushed the buttons for the elevator of the staff. Treasure was on the upper floors in a cityscape, meaning it was quite way down so you closed your eyes, relaxing against the metal wall. The elevator stopped already just one floor after yours but you did not bother to look who joined, just exhaling deeply and muttering to yourself. Now, you were looking forward to a hot bath and snacks. At least, even if you would fuck it up and lose it, you made enough with those fees to pay your rent for two months and cover groceries while thinking about what else to do. No! You needed to stop giving up so lightly.

“That’s a stunning dress, the shape really compliments you but I’d try a different color. Maybe dye your hair red, it would go well with your fiery personality, or what I heard about it. I believe, try cerulean should you give it a thought, but gold also could do it.”

You looked up as you realized the stranger was approaching you. The other figure was taller, not only because his shoes had light heels but because his entire appearance was stunning, long hair styled back, a pair of elegant sunglasses sitting on top of his head. He wore satin loose pants and a black blouse offering quite a bit of view, a scarf around his neck, and a well-known brand for a bag.

Park Seongwa was infamous, if you worked in this industry there just was no way around it and you could not deny that he wasn’t the reason why you were here. It wasn’t like you were one of those love-drunk women who fell in love with strangers on Instagram, but his style was one of a kind and when you followed him, learning he worked as an escort, it was how you learned about Treasure.

“While I am sure I’d look great in red, I am afraid they really think I am on fire then and not sure if this will be of much help,” you teased and somehow were quite pleased to see your reaction made him grin, likely enjoying it. A pity your clients did not seem to be as fond of somebody with a bite.

“Give it a go, when I started, I went pink. It did not only make them remember me much easier but it helped slipping into the role,” Seonghwa hummed. “I am counting on meeting you on the monthly party then,” he winked before placing the sunglasses down and walked out of the elevator when you made it to the parking area.

The monthly party was held at the end of the month and was meant for escorts to meet, exchange stories, and just hang out. While it was not mandatory, many simply came for the gifts often handed out by sponsors of Treasure or satisfied clients. To go there, you needed to have at least three fixed clients, something that was rather impossible now.

To get where he was… you sighed deeply and walked out, making your way to your sad looking little car.

Your body felt stiff by the time you were finally allowed to move again. Your hairdresser really was a savior, he didn’t only volunteer to cancel another appointment for you but he really did a great work at making you look like a natural ginger. It had been simple when you said it was for work and you’d be fine with him taking photos for his social media platform while paying him extra, he was in.

“I am not sure who convinced you to go for this but bless them, it really suits you perfectly.” He brushed through the curly waves a final time before you finally were ready to go. That much to having enough for the rent for the next two months, the price was steep but you told yourself you’d simply have to make it worth it. “Thanks again, see you soon,” you waved and stepped outside.

It was a lovely day, and as you had no lecture or work today, why not make the most out of it? You stepped relaxed through the city, windows hopping or so was the intention. There it was, a green dress with a perfect cut, one that complimented rather than exposed your figure, the teal color would go perfectly with your new hair and you could see the image Seonghwea tried to paint into your mind quite clearly now.

There was a deep sigh when you pulled on the persona you intended to portray as an escort: somebody confident and classy who could afford this. The saleslady was all over you, complimenting your figure and hair, the way you carried yourself, and was quite eager to show you the dress with a matching pair of heels. When you looked into the mirror, you’d not say this was another version of yourself, more like an upgraded representative of you on the days you felt glorious.

“The shoes are awful and the accessories do not match well;” a voice announced and for a moment, the lady seemed a little insulted by it but quickly fell silent when she looked at the man. He was shorter than others but when it came to fashion, he was far above them. Boldness spoke of the expensive brand pieces that carefully had been updated to complement Kim Hongjoong’s infamous fashion style. A pair of glasses slipped down on his nose when his eyes lingered on your appearance and you felt a slight flush on your cheeks.

What was it with those male escorts suddenly showing up left and right after you failed to get a glimpse of them ever since the first casting round?

“Let’s see, the red hair is meant to be the focus of the outfit. A beautiful face, why would you pair it with those golden shoes? It distracts in a bad way. Here, try those black ones instead, just the heel is a very nice brown to go with it and you do not need a necklace, instead a bracelet will do much better. Something bold, emerald colors.”

Hongjoong wasn’t only speaking from the perspective of a fashion expert, but you understood what he was doing. As an escort, you wanted the client to focus on your face when you were at a dinner date and emphasize holding hands by putting a small highlight on the wrist.

He suddenly stood next to you, offering you his selection. “Try it,” he hummed and suddenly sat down at the armchairs meant for the shopping company. You swallowed (again) and replaced the shoes with the one he handed, the necklace was given to the saleswoman who mumbled something and within a few minutes, the outfit was completed. The only part that was not quite perfect was the missing makeup but you did not feel bothered with this other than lipstick when you left to get your hair dyed.

“Twirl in a circle, let me see it,” Hongjoong’s voice was playful but commanding and for some reason, you gave in, doing just that. Fingers tapped together as he was thinking before shrugging out of his expensive leather jacket which had been altered with shining stones and a logo.

“Put this on, pull up the sleeves so we can see your pretty wrists.” Again, as much as your heart was beating, you went along with it and the pleased grin said all that needed to be.

“Hwa will complain, he likes people more elegant but I think, since you are feisty and bold, you should riot just a little, even in fashion.”

Hwa? Was he talking about Park Seonghwa? You never knew there was a connection between the two high-class male escorts, as you thought before, everyone remained for themselves but then maybe, this was what they told you. The best of the best did not bother to spend any time with the lower ranks and with that, all you knew was heard-said.

As you were about to take off the jacket, he waved, pulling out a credit card: “Keep it. I feel you likely already spent a fortune on that hair, you should give me your hairstyist contacts in return, I quite admire their work. I will pay for her.”

The woman and you looked a little shocked but she hurried over, bowing and accepting it. Hongjoong was already on the door by the time you made it off the podium and wanted to say anything but he did not seem to care too much about it.

“See you at the monthly meeting, pretty one."

Seriously?

“An acquaintance of yours?” the woman asked as she carefully packed the shoes back into the box. You were still staring at the door before turning around: “Something like that.”

You couldn’t stop staring at the price at the end of the listings, the outfit was likely more expensive than your car. It never was the intention to get any of it. You would have been polite and acted as if you were not pleased with the quality, just left it with a dream of a dress you’d not be able to wear more than once with the same client. If you finally would have gotten one.

The makeup was on point as you looked in the mirror. It was today or never, really. The outfit was perfect and gladly, your pouch was just fine with it. The client today seemed a little more promising but you knew when was your last chance. Song Mingi was a famous influencer, handsome and likely well situated but those were not too popular with the escorts of Treasure, they were known to quickly cause rumors and you easily were shown as a random flirt. Still, there was no reason to reject him so he landed on the list of yours to go for.

The influencer booked the first meeting in the lounge, something that would mean being closer while also suited comfortably. A higher fee too because it meant this one was more interested in actually booking you. He was looking for somebody ‘classy and fresh’ who could accompany him to important sponsor events without making a fuss. He was quite handsome and tall, you had to admit that, admiring his appearance before approaching him.

He was obviously surprised to see the changes of your appearance from the profile but his little grin indicated he was pleased about it. You smiled, offering your hand playfully: “Mister Song, a pleasure to meet you.” There was a playful smile on his lisp: “I appreciate you were available on such short notice.”

You tilted your head, pointing towards one of the many comfortable corners of couches and chairs within the lounge: “Of course, shall we sit? It will be much more comfortable to discuss everything there.”

He followed you over, this was it, succeed or apply for a dull retail job. The voice of your trainer returned, for the camera and the jury, you needed to pose, made them think it was your personality. You placed the pouch on the chair, tilting your body slightly aside to allow your legs to cross and the wrists to show.

A waiter appeared and you gave the order for the two of you as it was handled at Treasure and you made sure he felt as if he had your full attention.

“Working with influencers is quite rare,” the client never knew you were fresh meat and he was the one rejected by the bigger people. “I was quite curious to see your name. I peeked through your profile. It’s impressive for a creator of DIY fashion to make it to a very requested model and own business owner. Now, how may I aid your goal?”

Urgh, you were too quick, you should let him talk about himself before you summarized it but he was either just as inexperienced as you or preferred it that way.

“I put quite a bit of work in which is why this is important and I’d rather not risk it with impulsive behaviors. Yet, I need somebody that would look good on my side, authentic. I am about to get offered what you may call the deal of my life, and I need somebody that looks and acts the part without trying to ruin me a month later.”

He emptied half of his glass as his gaze was going over you again, your left feed waved slightly left and right when you took a much smaller and playful sip from your drink. “I perfectly understand and I gladly will prepare to take the role naturally. I quite feel our chemistry is very interesting, we will catch the right eyes.”

Confidence was important, you needed to balance it so it seemed natural, not nasty.

“There would be two events, both of where you would be expected to play as my girlfriend but neither of them is in the public eye. I am very aware of Treasure’s guidelines and limitations, and of course, will follow along with them but I must be certain, you are comfortable with the basic exchanges of affirmations?”

Kissing, holding hands, being pulled on a lap and hands on the cheek, those all were, for an extra charge, part of the companion package offered for those seeking a partner, either for private or public, tho again, the more people ask of you, the higher the charge. This could be a big deal and your way into ranking up faster.

You could not overlook them, as Mingi was sharing a few more details, the two figures were impossible to ignore, one taller than the other but both outstandingly handsome.

Park Seonghwa and Kim Hongjoong certainly knew how to catch the attention of everyone in the room, even the bartender cleared his throat before approaching them for their order when they settled down in the couch niche not too far from you and Mingi.

No, focus! It did not matter why they were here when neither of them ever bothered to interact with staff anymore outside of their managers. It was just how good they were at their jobs.

“I can promise you, there won’t be a reason to worry. If you decide to go with us, we will exchange contact data and we prepare everything, from the outfits to the details in the story. If you wish, we also can go on a date prior to the event, to ensure the chemistry display matches exactly your expectations.”

The man grinned: “Ah, you guys really are the best of the business, that sounds wonderful.” Mingi rose, so did you but when he reached out and kissed your hand, you froze again. Thankfully, he did not comment onto it, only nodded and left since all else first would have to be discussed with your leading manager.

For a moment you stood there, trying to figure out if you finally did it when voices disturbed the silence.

“Honey, why don’t you come and join us?”

“I didn’t remember I offered you pet names, Mister Park,” you teased and turned around to look at the two beautiful men. It was good that the way how the client meeting went was giving you a bit of a boost in courage, as you doubted you’d have been able to do anything but stare otherwise.

“See, I told you, she’s quite feisty,” Seonghwa hummed, leading the glass with a colorful cocktail to his lips. Hongjoong crossed his legs, likely pleased to see you were wearing the outfit he had put together for you. “Quite so, I can see the appeal and why they haven’t kicked her out yet.”

You reached for your glass and tried to look all casually as you moved it in your hand like you wanted to see the quality of the wine.

“A raw diamond, those are the best. They have the beauty of jewelry but weren’t bent by anyone, people forget to just look and not reach out,” Seonghwa continued as he leaned forward to put his glass on the desk.

What the fuck were they up to? You decided to remain confident in your spot.

“I appreciate all the advices given and … gifts but…”

“We want you to join us,” Hongjoong decided just to spit it out, Seonghwa chuckled by his side. “Joongie, if you say it like that, she’ll misunderstand.” The taller moved over, closing the distance to Hongjoong who was sipping on his drink.

“Well, I am afraid you are not wrong and I am not sure what you mean, Mister Park,” you answered and he rolled his eyes. “Please, let’s drop titles. We are all working for the same agency, we should go with names, Seonghwa and Hongjoong but feel free to be bold and go for nicknames.”

His arm curled around Hongjoong’s shoulder and you could feel the heat in your cheeks, almost as if you were caught watching something you weren’t supposed to see.

“Let me clarify it then,” Hongjoong nodded, painted nails tapping against the glass. “You see, Hwa and I have some clients we share and not in the fashion of, we see them on different days. No, they are the highest of the upper class and they pay quite a bit to have the company of the both of us at once. Expensive vacations, dinners in restaurants off to the public, last year, we received a penthouse as a Christmas gift. It might sound excessive to you but what your lower clients have too much in cash, they have in objects.”

Oh, he did not need to explain that. In some way, escorts were like sugar babes but with the freedom to simply stand up and leave by the time the booking was over, remember that based on the agency, able to reject anything, keeping the lines less blurred easily. Treasure was so famous and popular not just for the clients but also because it guaranteed the escorts this safety, if somebody broke the rules, the client was out and done. But of course, you knew reality was different, and at the end of the day, as long as it would not result in legal matters or scandals, it was up to the escort what they did in private settings.

“It still does not explain what it has to do with me,” you replied and placed the empty glass down on the table.

“Hwa prefers the pretty wealthy ladies, whereas I do not care too much about the gender of the client. Based on such preferences, one offers skinship, the other is eye candy. Of course, we are professionals and they know it from the start. Recently tho, more and more asked if we could not add something new to it. As a customer focused business, it is our highest goal to please our clients but Hwa and I have quite a few requirements.”

Hwa placed a slender finger against Hongjoong’s mouth, grinning at him. It was quite obvious that they were showcasing their undeniable chemistry and you could imagine how certain people would melt just for that, rich women in their 40s longing for the admiration of young men who would not betray them for her money.

“It requires somebody who isn’t just pretty but also has wit and something unique. When we heard there was a feisty new escort who scared away clients, it caught our interest and what we saw today, no doubt you are just the perfect fit.”

Seonghwa allowed for his head to rest against the shorter’s shoulder, pairs of watchful eyes now on you.

“You want for me to become part of your high-class escort trio to please and possibly win more clients,” you summarized it.

Hongjoong nodded: “Well, I stand up for claiming uncut diamonds are the best but it does not mean, there is no work to do, not only because the one thing we cannot do for you is ranking up. However, if the deal with that influencer goes well, and a little bit of efforts from our side with the management, it shouldn’t be a problem.”

Seonghwa sighed, sitting up and clapping his hands together: “But, you have two of the very best escorts in this city to your full exposure. The bases are all there, we just need to work on the details.”

Then, Seonghwa stood up and walked closer to you, you swallowed when his cool fingers gently grabbed your chin and made you look up. At least, this time you did not have the urge to punch another for doing this uninvited.

“Think about it, hun. Let’s say, we pick you up in three days. If you decide to join, we consider it an agreement and in return, share all of our little secrets and tricks with you. If you do not, we accept your decision.”

Seonghwa smiled sweetly before waving to Hoingjoong: “Let’s go, I got a nail appointment in fifteen.” Hongjoong laughed: “Ah right, now I am your driver again.” He brushed through his dark curls: “See you soon, Pretty one.”

All you could do was to turn around slowly, watching how they left you there, more confused than before.

When Seonghwa said he would send a driver to pick you up, you did not expect he meant to send you a booked car that would bring you to one of the city’s most exclusive buildings with lofts you doubted you would ever be able to afford in a lifetime. As you entered the spacious lift, you checked your makeup again, natural but complimenting your appearance. Your outfit wasn’t overdone, heels, jeans, an oversized button-up semi-tugged into the pants, half open with a tanktop covering too much view, sunglasses on top, and a stylish backpack.

You had no real idea what to expect but after thinking it through, you could not think of a reason why those two men would possibly try and trick you. Why not give it a try? It was not like you intended to work for Treasure forever, finish your major, then just enough to settle comfortably. This was the thing with starting your life with a sports career, once it was over, you needed to figure out where to go and people frowned when you told them how you were still a student at age twenty-five if not going for a medical or law degree.

When the door opened and Seonghwa smiled at you, you exhaled because it seemed you did not go all wrong with the wardrobe. He wore a knitted top that allowed gazes and you noticed how he only ever showed enough to take note of it after looking for a moment but never too much, it never looked thirsty but elegant. It was stunning to see a tall man wear shorts reaching above the knees and a pair of cowboy boots although likely because he only came back, as a hat was placed aside.

“You look great,” the nickname was close to slipping over his lips again when he corrected himself: “Y/N. Now, do you really mind it if I call you hun? We also could think of another name. I assume it is that each of us eventually finds a nickname we prefer to use for clients. Honey, hun, Joongie likes to go with all forms of pretty. Give it some time, you have one as well.”

His loft was stunning, as you took off your heels just because he did so too, you admired how it was both, classy yet comfortable, the small surprise was the array of shelves looking at Lego sets.

“It’s my little escape from our kind of lifestyle,” he waved. “I read, you used to be professional in gymnastics. Still, something you do?” You took notice of how the man pulled out three glasses, indicating it seemed the other would join in as well but it remained empty while he poured clear water in, adding colorful ice cubes.

“Not anymore, it was something of a passion growing up so I wanted to see where it would go but now, I feel more comfortable with my photography.”

Seonghwa chuckled: “Both are very beneficial for this kind of work. Your body control is stunning and a hobby that is easy to talk to. Thanks to Instagram, everyone feels like a photographer so you can easily entertain your clients with it. All you need is a good phone and some feel for frames.”

The man led you over to a comfortable arrangement of couches, his legs crossed as he sipped on his water, now observing your appearance, and the way how you followed him over. As you intended to sit down on the other side, he shook his head and waved you over.

You managed to swallow down the hesitation and walked over, sitting down by his side but your heart was beating when his arm curled around him. Park Seonghwa was a man of beauty unmatched and you wondered what would bring him into the world of a companionship escort, he easily could have become a model, a muse, anything really.

“I like this fashion on you, if anything I believe you need to try less and wear what you think suits you but go with what you enjoy, add a few experimental pieces but don’t worry, Hongjoong is great at that, he will guide you to perfection.”

He leaned forward to place his glass down before his now free hand reached out and held your chin gently again: “Relax, I will not ask you to do anything you are not comfortable with. Never forget, we escort are the ones in charge, like a performance. We choose what we let others see of us. Eventually, you will find clients who enjoy your temper but let’s say, you need to learn how to place it a little more proper, make it add to your charm but I feel there is something else.”

Sudden touch was still not something you had gotten used to, although you knew sitting like this was part of the job, for those who longed to have somebody play their significant other for a few hours.

“Today, Hongjoong and I will show you a few tricks, of getting the best results without too much effort. If you are uncomfortable at any point, you will tell me, won’t you hun?” His thumb gently brushed over your chin again. All you could do was nod and it seemed to be the confirmation Seonghwa waited for to lean in and kiss you.

In your mind, you reminded yourself that this was all part of the job training. Sure, Hwa would also benefit from it if you were able to join their little team but you were doing this for that point alone. It was good to be kissed without a warning, clients would not ask either but none of those would be Seonghwa, the way how his presence made you feel was hard to explain.

The kiss was tender at first, he was leaning in and his arm around your shoulder tightened to bring you in closer. You gasped when he was inviting you to push your tongue in but the moment was interrupted when the door was opened again and Hongjoong walked in, a pair of sunglasses dropped down on his notes.

“Should I go again? I did not know I’d interrupt a date,” he teased, voice a playful purr but it was enough to disturb the scene and Seonghwa withdrew. A small feeling of disappointment in your stomach was quickly ignored as you tried to put yourself back together.

“Of course, not, we just were warming up a little, weren’t we hun?” Seonghwa winked over to you, all you could do was nod and distract you with your water. Hongjoong did not show whether he believed you or not, only humming as he walked over and placed down the bags.

“Well, I brought gifts so I like to think, I can make it worth your time,” he seemed to have brought more clothes and you were a little excited but reminded yourself again, that this was meant to be a work environment and you’d just make a fool out of yourself if you suddenly acted like you all had been friends. It was hard to say just what this even was.

Unlike Seonghwa, the other male escort pulled out a bottle of what seemed to be fine wine and poured it into the prepared glass.

"Hwa is quite the expert, you see. I worked at Treasure first but he really was the one who walked in and showed me how to be most effective, including my own talents in my job," he turned around, the glass on his lips and when he placed it aside, you saw the lipstick on it.

“As already mentioned a few times, the goal is to give them as little as possible to get the most out of it. We show you a few tricks today. Of course, our clients, the ones we want to introduce you to, there will be a little more involved.” Seonghwa relaxed against the couch as he watched you with curiosity.

“Such includes, for the three of us to also exchange certain affections. I believe, us being such a great match in aesthetic will make it quite enjoyable us as well,” Seonghwa chuckled before he got up and walked over to Hongjoong. “Where shall we start, Joongie, what do you think? Y/N looks quite stunning, doesn’t she? I do not think we need any further lessons in appearance.”

The shorter man looked up and down, fingers tapping against his cheek as he grinned: “Agreed. How about we combine simple and extended lessons and then, waste no time? Concluding it with the most fun parts. I know you prepared well, Hwa, didn’t you?”

You had no idea what they were talking about but you found yourself relaxing, an odd anticipation taking over as they spoke. It was enjoyable to watch them, their bodies moving in a rhythm that really was outstanding chemistry, the way how their playful little gazes never failed and touched, so subtle, yet they made you wonder what it would be like, to see them kiss. Oh, you were not prepared just how fast all of that would become reality.

“Of course, you know me. Now, I believe this is a good idea so let’s move to something more suited for practice, shall we handsome? Hun, leave your phone here, you will not need it,” Seonghwa waved, indicating to follow him. You quickly glanced at your phone before turning it on busy before you quietly stalked behind the two escorts.

Seonghwa truly had the most stunning home, when he opened the doors, you were greeted not only by a large pool that did not seem to have an edge but a spacious outdoor area with couches, chairs, a bar that would make many lounges jealous and a large selection of perfectly placed plants. You recognized some of them from the man’s social media accounts.

“As you rank up, wealthy clients love to take you to their vacation homes or spare apartments, often to places such as this, which offer them to relax and feed their imaginations. It will make a perfect practice ground,” Seonghwa explained and brushed his long hair back.

“Hongjoong will be our lucky client today, watch us. We will show you how we often handle our clients, but you are encouraged to enjoy the show as well;” the man grinned and you bit your lip but winked: “I shall observe well.”

The escort was pleased with the answer as Hongjoong shrugged out of his jacket: “It will help because after that we will play a little bit of customer time.” Neither of the two needed to add how likely it would be the three of you at the end of all. No, they did not only intend to show you how they succeeded but also to test your chemistry as a trio, and see how you would fit in before a final decision was made.

The oldest walked over to the bar, opening the fridge to pull out a bottle of champagne, ice cubes and two glasses, pouring them elegantly in while Hongjoong settled down. This was the first time you really had the chance to admire the other man. He was shorter than the majority of male escorts and maybe even your friends but his confidence, his fashion style, it easily made up for it. His features didn’t lack anything at all, you loved how sharp they seemed, yet they held a certain softness, just like those lips.

No okay, what was up with you? First you were kissing Seonghwa a little too long and now you wondered what it would feel like to do the same with Joong. You swallowed, trying to focus and learn from your colleagues.

“Mister Kim, it has been far too long, almost two weeks,” Seonghwa’s voice was playful, teasing the other as he walked around, offering him a glass before taking the spot by his side, legs crossed. His body language was stunning, there were all these little details. The way he moved to present the part of his face he preferred, one hand holding the glass to take only the smallest sips, leading them to plumb lips,, and sometimes his teeth were biting down on them while the other arm was allowed to rest against the bar counter, chin on the hand as he tilted his head slightly, his gaze playing with Hongjoong’s without needing any big works or showcase of skin. Not that there was not plenty to look at.

Seonghwa’s long hair fell naturally around his beautiful face, the top allowed for the collarbone to shine, especially thanks to the way he was sitting there.

“I was quite busy, looking to expand my team,” the younger said, taking a larger sip before placing it down. “Oh? Did you find somebody fitting then?” the other asked casually, his leg moving all so slightly.

“Quite so, stunning young woman. I am working on a dress, I think it would look quite amazing on her. If anything, I find myself imaging how her long ginger hair falls over her shoulders as she puts on a pearl necklace that would go so well with it.”

Your cheeks heat up when you notice he is talking about you, somehow you end up leaning forward without thinking about it, anticipation growing.

Seonghwa’s face changed, playing as he was a little disappointed to hear Hongjoong daydreaming about another.

Of course, this differed from client to client, some really only longed for company, to talk about their day but you could imagine, the people who asked these two to add a third unlikely counted to such. They wanted more, the feeling for their lives to be like a book, surrounded by who they deemed pretty, indulging in imaginations.

“Oh? Should I be jealous? Here I was, thinking I am your muse,” he placed his glass aside, leaning forward. “Do I have to worry I will no longer receive an invitation?”

Hongjoong grinned as he grabbed Hwa’s chin the same way the older liked to do with yours, forcing to tilt the man’s head just a little: “I will not deny, I might find myself thinking about her all so often now but who could ever replace you, pretty star? There is only one of those, after all.”

Seonghwa chuckled, long fingers now reaching out to grab the other’s shirt, pulling him even closer: “Good, otherwise, I fear I’d have tried to win you back.” The last words were barely audible at your spot as their lips sealed in a deep kiss.

Hongjoong was leaning back, giving Seonghwa more room to lean in and the older escort gladly did so. You could see how his teeth bit and tugged on the other’s lips, hands resting comfortably on a slim waist and there was a loud gasp.

It was only now how you realized it was yours and it caught the attention of the two men. While Hongjoong was just smiling amused, Seonghwa seemed more pleased, he let go of the escort and slipped off the chair, moving over to you like a hunting cat.

“Oh, honey. We aren’t even done yet and you already do not like to split our attention?” he teased. It seemed an odd thing to say, he was more talking to you like a client rather than a co-worker trying to simply teach you a few tricks.

“Sorry, I guess, I just did not expect you two would kiss like that,” you admitted and the tall man seated himself next to you. “If the client desires this little daydream, we will entertain it. As Hongjoong said, as for myself, I have a preference for the beauty of women but look at him, a gorgeous man, how could I not enjoy kissing him?”

While he was complimenting the other escort, his gaze was all on you, his body leaning in like he was telling you that he’d rather kiss you again and for a moment, at the edge of your gaze, you felt as Hongjoong’s expressions slipped.

It was hard to really tell because there he went again, kissing you and this time, Seonghwa did not hesitate at all. Instead, he pulled you closer, up onto his lap when his tongue was eager to meet yours but his arms remained around your waist without dropping too far up or bellow.

This was the first time somebody kissed you like that without being drunk. Your ex always tried to get into it but you hated the taste of too much beer but Hwa tasted sweet, like a blurry summer vacation you always longed to get back to. Every soul longed for Summer but when it came, it never lived up to the expectation, the memory.

Why were you thinking about that now? You should enjoy the kiss, who would not fucking do anything to kiss a man like Park Seonghwa? At least, he did not seem to notice that there was a small, doubting voice in the back of your mind. He likely just took your lack of enthusiasm as a sign of being nervous.

“I have to go,” Hongjoong suddenly said and you could see how Seonghwa frowned, not too pleased about the interruption once more.

“We are not done yet, Joongie. Where do you possibly have to go now?”

There was a sign of hesitation, like he did not really want to tell but the older’s gaze was too demanding to simply ignore it. “I sent my article to another fashion magazine and they just replied that they’d like to see a few more …”

It was strange to suddenly see the confident man so shy, but the escort by your side just seemed to get more displeased as the conversation went on.

“Hongjoong, you do not still have this silly dream to become a creative director for a fashion magazine, right? We talked about it. You are far too old to get into this now, and why would you? There are at least ten more years of being an escort in for you, all the money you could need to set up a fruitful future and meet the right people. Why would you start working from the bottom?”

If you hadn’t been too busy trying to take all those pieces of information in, you’d have noticed how the other winced a little. Seonghwa’s sharp voice was not even trying to hide how little he believed in the dream of his fellow escort, even seemed to look down on it.

There was this itch in your chest, a familiarity you knew too well. It was the day when your family and your trainer gathered and you announced you’d not further invest in a career related to a sport you only explored so far because it felt like an exception. Photography, everyone could do that these days, they said.

Seonghwa used similar words earlier, but maybe he meant it.

“Well, I will drive you,” you suddenly announced and slipped off from Seonghwa’s lap but the taller suddenly grabbed your wrist. “And why would you go?”

For a moment, it was impossible to read his gaze and Hongjoong was about to promise he was fine when you casually shrugged it off. You were the escort known to scare off customers, it would not be too suspicious.

“Hongjoong drunk two glasses of alcohol since he came here and it seems, I am the only one who is still sober. Is it okay if I leave my car here for the night, Hwa?” you asked sweetly, leaning in and placing a kiss on his cheek.

It seemed to calm him down and he chuckled: “Ah, so caring. Joongie is quite lucky, isn’t he? I have a keen interest in keeping my two favorite people both happy and safe. Let’s pick this lesson up another time then.”

You exhaled and winked: “I am looking forward to it.” You blew him a playful kiss before moving towards the door: “Shall we?”

Hongjoong still seemed surprised about the way you acted all of a sudden, he moved over, placing a soft kiss on the escort’s cheek: “Thank you for hosting us, Hwa.” Without further note, he also walked out and followed you.

While Hongjoong picked up one of the three bags he brought and his own phone, you got your backpack and pointed for him to lead the way.

“Are you sure? I just could call an uber,” he offered. Did you just imagine it or was he a little shy? You shook your head: “Nonsense, you will need your car and I am used to just getting home somehow. Don’t worry, about it.” You offered your hand to him and he placed a key in. As you made it to the garage, you quickly found it. While the car was definitely a higher-class model compared to yours, it was surprisingly reserved for a man of his style.

You slipped into the driver’s seat and adjusted it while Hongjoong placed his stuff on the back seats before joining you, clipping the safely belt in. “Good to go, Miss Y/N;” he joked but his smile finally relaxed again.

You stared for too long, you knew that because Hongjoong mistook your surprise for disappointment: ”It’s not much…but it does it for me. I saved up most of the money I make, well the part I’d not need for appearance anyway.” There was hesitation in every word and you felt guilty.

His place was nothing like Seonghwa’s. It was about double the size of your own little apartment, instead of a living room, there was an office one would expect to see in a fashion show, like in this 2010 movie of the evil fashion magazine director. Finally, the other escort’s description earlier made sense and you stepped closer. It was so obvious how much passion and love for the detail Hongjoong put into every bit of research made for the most recent fashion shows, upcoming collections, or even just snippets he cut out of another magazine.

“That’s impressive,” you admitted, reminding yourself once again what you concluded just days ago: most escorts preferred to leave their private life outside of the agency’s doors. It made sense, that way you could protect your own little space like this and now you felt even worse because Seonghwa was mocking his own friend so much about this.

Were they even friends, or did you simply underestimate just how on-point their professional chemistry really was?

“Thank you, I… always liked fashion. I started to put together my own outfits and alter them when I was a teen but the truth is, I always knew I did not want to design it but talk about it, share my passion and my thoughts.”

That was something you could understand, you also felt more comfortable behind the camera rather than in front of it.

“My parents, but especially my dad, they were all against this. What kind of career is it to write about clothing?” he imitated a deeper voice and you looked over to him. For a moment, the pain was so obvious on Hongjoong’s face that you finally fell out of this little cloud you had been in the past few days, the adrenaline of feeling like a princess, having been picked by the princes’ of Treasure to work with.

“If I wanted to chase my dream, I’d have to do it on my own. Anyway, there was a rent you had to pay and a student fee I certainly could not afford, not to forget that to write about fashion other than having a specific degree, you were supposed to show it. Working as an escort seemed like a great choice then, Treasure was just opening and the idea of making the level of money without having to sell yourself entirely was just much more tempting. I thought it might also open some doors.”

You had no doubt he was telling you all of this only because he likely had to swallow it down for so long, nobody that cared to hear about it.

“Well, turns out creativity, a degree and money mean nothing without the connections and I barely can ask my clients for help, can I? I keep applying but they want big names like…”

“Seonghwa,” you concluded and the other man nodded, walking over to the kitchen after shrugging out of expensive clothes, and filling two glasses with water. “A year ago, I was reckless… maybe naive. I thought that maybe he could introduce me to the people. Our pretty star is after all, also very successful on social media and unlike myself, he knows the people.”

The way how Hongjong bit his lip told everything and thinking back about the scene earlier, you could picture the rest. In a way, it even answered your own question, of why somebody like Park Seonghwa led the life of a high-class escort when he could be anything: because he wanted to. He got paid for being adored while able to play with people and all kinds of roles. The attention was different from the one a mere influencer received.

“I never brought it up again and just quietly sent more applications, this is the first answer I received at all that was not a straight rejection, so it’s important to me.” You had this silly urge to hug him when he offered you a glass of water almost shyly.

Hongjoong had been nice and caring, and while there was no way around denying just how much you enjoyed Seonghwa’s attention as he mastered to make you feel adored like no other, you wanted to try and support this guy here. “I think it’s awesome, I mean, you walked such a tough way and here you are, still doing your best. If I ever can help you… not sure how but, let me know. Think of it as a token of graduation for the jacket, which I admit I wear a lot in my private time.”

To your surprise, he was grinning rather than seemingly shy. “Well, it suits you better most certainly, I have a few other pieces I think, you’d look amazing in. Although I feel for today, we have done enough.” You glanced at your watch and while you expected for this day to go different, you bit your cheek.

“Would you mind if I stay maybe another hour? I could call a friend of mine to pick me up and get me back to my apartment. She works nearby.”

The older blinked before nodding: “Of course, do you want anything? A snack maybe? Seonghwa is amazing but please do not let him talk you into diets, okay? You are literally PERFECT!” You blushed hearing this, and Hongjoong chuckled. “You know, natural blush does suit you well;” he winked, seemingly back to his more confident and flirty self.

“I … am okay, thank you.” You took the second glass and moved over to the couch, mumbling over it as you took a sip. Hongjoong was starting to place a few things aside while you texted your friend, asking if she could come here.

The silence felt a little awkward so you tried to think of something until your eyes glanced over the photos. “You know, if you want some help taking pictures of your fashion pieces for that example you work on, I could help. I actually put all my savings into camera equipment, since I am working as a photography major. My focus is portraits but I have done some wedding shots when I enrolled in college, to cover some extra costs.”

The man looked up: “Oh that is right, Hwa mentioned it. Mh, this is pretty serious then, huh? I am glad.. don’t get me wrong, for somebody who has been with Treasure for so long and benefitting from clients… don’t get stuck there, Pretty One. There is more for you. Chase your goals, just take it as a kick-off.”

For a moment, it was like he was telling you to be wiser than him but neither of you said it out loud. All you could do was smile, touched Hongjoong worried about you after only knowing you for such a short time.

“I promise, I won’t.”

“You are looking hot,” Mingi whispered, a grin tugging on his lips as his arm curled around your waist. All you could do was look sweetly at him: “Well, thank you very much. I like to think the two of us make quite the couple.” Your first client was pleased with the reaction and he hummed, nodding in agreement. “Why don’t you get comfortable? I will go and get us more drinks. I am sure, the host should arrive any time soon now.” You offered him a nod and watched as the tall man rushed off.

Hongjoong really had outdone himself with the outfit, it was perfect and harmonized with your fake hair color and your eyes. He had shoved it into your hands after your friend picked you up and since then, you did not see him at all. Every time you went to Seonghwa’s place, he excused himself, text messages about a client that was needing more attention than all others. You could see how displeased the older escort was about it, leading to your confusion about maybe there being something else instead.

You were disappointed about it but it was hard to tell why. Maybe you misread Hongjoong’s interest in working with you on his project and he only agreed to it to be polite.

At this point, Seonghwa treated you like a year-old friend rather than a woman he met barely a month ago. He never stopped to shower you in compliments, but he also was anything but shy. The moment you stepped into his fancy apartment, he kissed you, playing with your hair and seemingly enjoying grabbing your chin gently to look at your face. His arms grew bolder, travling further down your waist, and whispering sweet nothings to your ear. There were gifts and alcohol and he took you shopping, rambling it was all part of getting you loose for your first client.

Mingi booked you after another meeting and today was finally the big day. Everything was perfect, or you told yourself so. The fashion influencer was anything but shy, he kissed you quite passionately twice already and maybe, Seonghwa had been right to simply do the same, making you no longer grow tense about the intrusion. At least, while being a flirt, Mingi was rather polite and he kept his hands exactly as far as you told him to be comfortable.

“He’s stunning,” a woman whispered. “But isn’t he an escort?” another asked and you looked up when the word dropped. “Who cares? If I’d have the money, I’d certainly also pay him,” she chuckled and your gaze followed along. The owner of the company, which was about to offer a big deal to Mingi, was a woman and on her arm was no other than Seonghwa. His shoes were made of fine leather, oversized pants made of expensive fabric, and his chest almost laid bare of not for a satin top cut deep. His hair was styled back and the jewelery added the rest to it.

He didn’t once mention that he would be here but then, why would he? This was his business and he never spoke about that with you unless he was given you tips. You really needed to turn on that pretty head of yours and start thinking rather than getting lost in the luxury and thrill.

The moment your gazes met, you knew it was too late. Seonghwa smiled sweetly, whispering to the woman who immediately looked at you and you were relieved when Mingi returned because they made their way over. “I think, this is the host,” you whispered, doing just anything in your power to remain professional.

Mingi swallowed, offering you a glass, and looking at you. You offered him an encouraging smile like a girlfriend would before he looked up, just in time for the two to arrive.

“Mister Song, I am most pleased you have made it,” the woman said and he shook her head, smiling lightly: “My pleasure, I was quite surprised to receive an invitation.” She smiled at him, a beautiful woman in her late 30s, full of confidence and beauty. For a second, you felt a little ashamed of how you seemed so much the opposite, maybe not in beauty but the success. You did not even really try for what you called your own dream…

“Well, I like to invite the unexpected. Those are much more promising. There is some time until food is served. Why don’t we walk to my office, and you tell me more about your current project,” she smiled before turning around to the escort. “Seonghwa, would you mind to stay with Mister Song’s company? I’d hate to steal him and leave her on her own.”

The escort smiled sweetly: “Of course, it would be my pleasure.” Mingi leaned in, pressing a quick kiss on your lips: “I see you later, love. It won’t be long.” You tapped against his shoulder: “No worries, take your time.” As the two people walked away, you could feel how Seonghwa settled down next to you and you needed to swallow the question of why he did not tell you he’d come.

You froze when you felt his fingers playing with your hair. “Why so tense hun? That’s so rare for you now. All of our little explorations certainly have paid out, did they not? Look how relaxed you are, looking stunning, pleasing your client.”

As you tried to reach for the drink Mingi brought you, Seonghwa was faster, leading it to his own lips. You blinked, confused about what he was trying to do. This was a job and you considered that he’d act the part but that was incorrect.

“What are you doing, handsome” you joked but Seonghwa threw the most tempting glances at you, leaving a shade of lipstick on the glass as he offered it to you.

“Paying all of my attention to my favorite flower. It is quite hard you know, you look very kissable today,” he purred and he knew exactly what kind of effect this had on you these days.

Why?

What was it that you forgot all good sense and morals when he was flirting like that when you knew so obviously this was all Seonghwa wanted, attention, playing, pleasure. “Since my other favorite person seems to fancy the company of his paper pages and photos, I am most grateful to have you by my side,” he breathed to your ear.

The memory flashed to your mind when you saw the two together for the first time at the lounge, how comfortable and confident they looked together but now, you wondered if Hongjoong simply played along because it was what Sweonghwa trained the both of you to do.

Admiration, a quickened heartbeat, the high of being given the attention.

“Why don’t we explore the property? She’s one of my most beloved clients and I know all the good little spots. It could be fun.” The way he formed the words indicated that this was the moment you both, craved and feared to come.

He was inviting you to be more, do more. The one difference to Hongjoong was the very fact the other had stated: Seonghwa loved beautiful women, and you were just that based on his words.

“Hwa,” you started innocently: “I do not think that would be a good idea. You said it yourself, ranking up is on me and if this one goes well, it will be much easier.”

His long fingers played with your hair and he was already so close, you could smell the expensive perfume, your mind remembered what it felt like to have the now styled-back hair tickling your face. You swallowed, your body reacted in a certain way.

“I will come up with a good excuse. They will be away for an hour at least, quite long for some bored poor partners being left behind. There is a quiet corner, I think you’d enjoy it, Hun.”

A smile of honey on his lips as he brushed over your cheeks, your heart beating loudly as you stared at him, body reaction, leaning in, imagination running wild. The idea of being pushed against the wall by the taller, feeling his fingertips ghosting all over your body, lips pressed against your neck, sensing how he slowly would trace down…

Your mind finally kicked in.

No. You promised Hongjoong not to forget your dream but somehow you knew, that once you started to give in to such foolish desires, there would be no way out of it. You knew yourself, you would keep finding excuses to stay with Seonghwa, stay an escort at Treasure, just as it took you years to finally stop with the excuses of why you kept going with a sports career everyone but you dreamt for you.

“You are quite good at tests, Hwa,” you chuckled and played dumb. If he read your body right, he’d knew and there was a hint of anger on his fair features, if only for a moment. “Ah, you got me there Hun. You did very well, Mister Song can be quite pleased with you.” For a moment he remained close, like he was waiting for you to change your mind but when nobody happened, Seonghwa lost interest and leaned back.

It only took so long until others joined you, people mesmerized by Seonghwa’s presence who loved the attention and it was easy to excuse yourself at once.

The deal went well and when Mingi returned, he apologized, saying he was invited to an extra event later on. You hurried to tell him it was just fine when he offered to book you a taxi. I the end, you regretted it because you had come here with him and there was no friend you could call to pick you up. How to explain why you were here, dressed like some internet celebrity? There only were two people who came to mind. Yeosang did not pick up but Hongjoong was on the line the moment you pushed his name.

“How did it go?” he asked, voice cheery but grew concerned when it was silence which greeted him. There was a moment when neither of you said anything as you realized you were holding back tears.

You felt so stupid because you finally asked what the fuck you were doing here, with your life, being something you were not.

“I will pick you up,” his voice was soft. He did not need to hear his answer, you could hear how he already grabbed his keys.

“It will be okay, just stay where you are, okay? Take a deep breath. First client and such a big event, it can be a lot. You did well, Y/N.”

All you could do was whisper a Thank You before you ended the call, pulling off those high heels and waiting for Hongjoong in front of one of the city’s most expensive mansions.

You felt a little more collected by the time the familiar car appeared and you slipped onto the passenger seat. It did not change that brown eyes scanned you with worry and you forced a smile: “I am okay, I just overreacted a little. Thank you for picking me up.” Hongjoong looked different today but not in a bad way, more relaxed with jeans and a hoodie, brown waves loosely dancing around his face.

“Hey, there is no overreacting. If your emotions felt too much, that is very understandable and valid,” he tried to comfort you and you placed the heels on the floor as you looked at him. He likely still could see the hint of red in your eyes, although you only cried for a few minutes. “Do you want me to drive you anywhere? Home, or to a friend?” He was soft and did not pressure you to talk about it.

“Actually, do you think I could stay at your place… I have the habit of overworrying about nothing and styled like this,” you began but Hongjoong was quick to flash you a smile, understanding what you were trying to say. Nobody in your private circle was supposed to know. “Of course, the time is fairly good! I have mapped out my article and I can show you if your offer of working on those photos with me still stands.”

He really was giving it his all and you felt guilty how you were fleeing to him after it was Seonghwa you looked at for so long so openly while he was around, just now to cry about having rejected him.

“That sounds awesome.” He nodded and the rest of the drive was done in silence, up until he unlocked the apartment once more, you left your belongings on the door and Hongjoong disappeared in his bedroom before coming back with a pair of more comfortable-looking clothes.

“There are towels in the bathroom if you want to freshen up. I guessed, it probably would be more comfortable, to wear something else. Not that you don’t look gorgeous,” he promised and you appreciated the thought, accepting it. “That sounds nice, thank you.” You walked over to his bathroom and were a little amazed. There was an entire corner purely dedicated to makeup. A mixture of big brand names but also more average every day products, fingers traced along then until you hesitated.

You were a damn lost case, weren’t you? Acting like that all day, just now to reach for his perfume and spray some of it on your wrist. You did notice how Hongjoong always smelt the same, unlike Seonghwa who rotated between different expensive fragrances based on his mood but the younger was more content, it was a comforting but exciting one.

“Ah, shush!” you scolded yourself before stripping and enjoying the shower, your hair finally no longer dying the water red as you enjoyed the feeling. Around twenty minutes later, you stepped out and there was a blush on Hongjoong’s cheek when he saw you in his clothes, one he tried to hide as he cleared his throat and pointed to the kitchen counter where a few sandwiches piled up together with hot cups of coffee and tea.

“I wasn’t sure which of the two you like better but you should eat something,” he insisted and sat down on the other bar stool. You smiled and joined him: “Ah, Joongie, you take good care of me always, you know?” It was strange to admit considering you did not spend so much time together but he always was thoughtful of you and your wishes, and boundaries.

“Mh, I just know bad habits sneak in quickly, I want you to be comfortable and not worry about food.” You grabbed a sandwich and one of the coffee cups, taking a bite: “I promise, I love food too much to do so.” The little remark made him grin and for a while, you just remembered how nice it was to have company for a meal, spending them alone in your apartment most of the time these days.

“Okay, the theme is Spring, we are already dealing with Winter fashion, and the bases for the upcoming seasons are done, so I was thinking, we could do something with this vibe. I have a few friends we could ask to model for us,” he explained half an hour later as you followed the mood board and aesthetics he put together.

“I can see the vision, we can make something cool out of it! There is this small library and a cafe I went to a few times, it could suit it really well, like coming out of a dark Winter in glorious outfits,” you suggested, Hongjoong grinned: “I see, somebody does like fashion. I knew it when we first met and you picked the best piece they had.”

You grinned back: “Just a little. We had very strict guidelines for gymnastics but for events after, you wanted to impress a little, you know, sponsors and all of that.” Another reason why you thought this job was for you. Your parents really were right, you were a naive girl dreaming. As you bit your lips, you could feel Hongjoong’s hand and suddenly, he pulled you into a hug.

“I always thought this helps when thoughts go too wild,” he whispered, searching for your confirmation this was okay and you could feel how you relaxed a little. “It does,” you whispered. For a few minutes, you just stood there like this before he pulled you over to his couch and settled down, allowing you to rest against him. How strange, you felt so content and comfortable with him although you only had known him for a short time.

“Hwa was there, wasn’t he?” Hongjoong finally dared to ask. “I should have known when I looked at the event when I prepared the outfit, I made the beginner’s mistake of not properly researching the owner, since your part was only to look good on your client’s side. I was unaware it was one of his clients, I am sorry.”

You slowly turned your head around to look at him: “Why would that be your fault?”

There was a moment of hesitation before he sighed: “I know how Seonghwa is and I knew what he thought when we all met at the lounge. A beautiful woman with a temper, that’s something new to him, the way how quickly he had grown comfortable around you, I knew he had a particular interest. I guess, I just did not expect he’d go as far as to make his interest known while you were on a job. He could have waited or done it sooner, considering it’s mutual.”

Hongjoong spoke, he seemed to brood over the result when you just were surprised. “Mutual interest? What do you mean?” The other escort looked at you slowly: “Ah I mean … it is quite obvious you are fond of Seonghwa… It’s why I kept my distance, I thought giving you two more time would be appropriate… although I worried how deep his interest goes,” the last words were a whisper.

Maybe deep down, the future fashion director knew that Seonghwa was looking for fun and entertainment, a challenge, beauty but not love. As much as you enjoyed all of the glamour and attention, at the end of the day you were a dreamer looking for love. A helplessly romantic person.

“I cannot admit I am more than smitten with him. He’s gorgeous, not only his style but the confidence he shows, the way he lives… That’s a goal we all have a little but I think I finally realized that I’m not made for this kind of life but I promise you… as embarrassing as it is to admit… my interest in him was more … sensual than romantic.”

You could read the surprise on his face, blinking as he sighed deeply, a hand covering his eyes: “I really was a fool not to get that much and just leaving you on your own when you were all new, I…”

You reached out and stopped him, pleading: “It’s really not your fault. Please stop blaming yourself.” Hongjoong suddenly seemed shy but also longing, there was something in his eyes that was quietly asking for permission: to be gentle, admired, and loved. You could hear your heartbeat loudly in your ears when you gave it to him.

Kissing Hongjoong really was different from kissing Seonghwa. His lips were just as soft but without any products adding taste, the way how he allowed an arm to rest around your figure was careful, gentle. He allowed for his eyes to close and gave the lead up to you entirely. The kiss was curious but far more innocent than any you ever exchanged with the older escort but maybe it was why it felt right.

Hongjoong was all that Seonghwa was not when it came to the time outside of the job. A switch that allowed for him to just be his natural self while no client and no colleagues were looking and you enjoyed it.

As your lips finally parted, he blinked, a shy smile on his lips, admitting: “This was nice.” You returned it, smiling: “It was… mind if we do it again?” Hongjoong chuckled, the confident grin finally returning to his lips: “You may do so.”

Your companionship and chemistry felt more natural, like two people who told themselves being different sometimes was the only way to achieve their dreams, no matter how high the price but all you really wanted was to be who you were.

It showed in the way how you melted into one, the whispers of sweet admiration, of careful exploration and always seeking to act entirely in each other’s comforts. Bodies flushed tightly together and breaths becoming one.

The memory of his bare skin, the way the dark sweaty hair clung to his face and his lips curled into a playful smile stuck with you even by the time you made it home.

It would have been perfect, if not for a tall figure waiting for you there. Seonghwa still wore the same outfit he did hours ago but seemingly a little more tugged. His dark eyes were all over your form.

“So Joongie did pick you up after all. I almost guessed so, he seems to be quite keen, coming to your rescue,” he purred but his eyes failed to play along this time. It was hard to tell if he was simply annoyed or jealous.

“He did, he borrowed me some clothes. I was a little tipsy so I decided to wait, don’t want the neighbors any more suspicious,” you joked but froze the moment Seonghwa grabbed your chin, this time less gentle than he usually did.

“You smell like him, so don’t try to lie to me, little flower,” he whispered. “How peculiar, you were so against the idea to be with me but it seems, not as much with him. Ah, maybe the mistake has been on me, I must have underestimated the softness the two of you share.”

Finally, he let go, looking at you: “It seems, there is no much more I can teach you, hun. You did quite well today, your client was most pleased. What a pity our partnership did not come to happen but I had quite an enjoyable time.”

He turned around and you swallowed, although having been prepared he likely would ditch you just like that. At least, it was a reality check, one showing you that at the end of the day, you just were one pretty flower and he likely had more than plenty to fill the spot.

Maybe losing Hongjoong was much harder for Seonghwa, after working together for years.

As he turned around and walked to the staircase, he said: “Should you ever get bored of soft, you know where to find me.”

He winked, shoving something in his pocket before leaving.

All you could do was staring in confusion as he left you standing there all alone.

“I can’t find my phone,” you sighed and looked at Yeosang. “I must have lost it somewhere. I honestly cannot even remember when I really had it last. I bought a new one but my stupid provider needs like a week to send me a new card for it.”

You sighed, relaxing over the bar. It had been a long two days. Without your phone, it wasn’t as if anyone could reach you but nobody came over either. When you parked, you saw Seonghwa who did not even give you the smallest of glances, like you did not exist.

“It’s insane how it still takes so long,” the other agreed, leading the drink to his lips. You came here to let the manager know you were unavailable until then and ran into Yeosang who invited you to a drink. You were thankful he did not seem to ask about Seonghwa at all, although there obviously had been some rumors, not only about him tho.

“Oh did you know, Hongjoong quit last night,” Yeosang shared casually but you suddenly found yourself sitting up.

“Wait, he did?! Why?!”

This seemed sudden, he said that he was expecting a call from that magazine to check with them if his idea would be appropriate but the idea he just stopped working for Treasure was a little rushed.

Maybe it was the idea how you were quietly waiting if just maybe, he’d show up here at the headquarters after not having come to visit at your place, although you slipped your address into his notebook.

“Well, he said he wanted to pursue another career, it was very surprising to everyone. He’s flying to the United States for an interview. That is what the manager told me anyway.”

Why would he leave so suddenly without telling you? Your stomach flipped when you thought the memories through. After confessing to each other’s softness, of sleeping together, the shy and excited smile and little kisses he gave you when you left, it seemed unexpected he’d just go.

Did you read too much into it?

“I have to go,” you breathed, grabbing your keys and rushing to your car. To your surprise, Seonghwa was leaning against it. You swallowed, not in the mood to deal with him but he made no indication to move away.

“Hwa, I have to go, Hongjoong just quit, I have to find him.”

“I wonder why that is,” he hummed before looking at you, sighing: “You really stirred more than I expected and not what I hoped for. Here I was, thinking you were a great addition to our duo, not that you would be the encouragement to chase his stupid dream. One he is way too keen on sharing with you, considering you know for how long?”

You swallowed, staring at him: “How do you know that?” The escort looked innocently before he held it up, your phone. “Advice for the future, you should hide your screen messages.” He must have pulled it out of your pocket after he waited in front of your apartment.

You grew pale when you snatched it and opened it, reading the messages you did not get to reply to.

Two Days Ago

Joongie: I really enjoyed our time together Joongie: or well, spending time with you Joongie: after having limited my circle to all those caring for money so long I forgot Joongie: so thank you for … liking me Joongie: I… kind of like you, I just wanted for you to know

One Day Ago

Joongie: hope you are feeling better! Joongie: that magazine just called me! and they actually got a free spot Joongie: not fixed but they invited me for an interview! Joongie: I know that’s a little insane, really, it only would be for three days Joongie: but want to come? I got a second ticket for you Joongie: it’s a bit rushed but yeah

Today

Joongie: I guess, I was a bit pressuring Joongie: I am sorry, I should not have thought so much into it Joongie: Make sure you eat a lot, okay? Take breaks Joongie: remember you matter more than clients Joongie: You are… perfect like this

Joongie: my flight leaves in an hour, I guess Joongie: if you ever need anything again, call me Joongie: it was nice meeting you, thank you for everything

You checked the time, the flight was about to leave in less than half an hour. The airport was around fifteen minutes from here.

“You really are hopeless,” Seonghwa sighed but you were in panic mode, ignoring him as you got into your car and drove off like a madwoman, praying to all the gods to please empty the streets for you. Hongjoong likely already turned on airplane mode as he only the Ai voice answered that call couldn’t be forwarded.

You fought back tears, having been so foolish not just to go and show up at his place again, not even bothered to let him know you lost your damn phone. The fact that Seonghwa had stolen it, was likely to cause something like this.

Now nothing mattered, when you slipped out of your car, you just grabbed your phone and after a second, you took off your heels, throwing them onto the passenger seat before you were running through the airport, gaining more than one questioning gaze from passengers who barely bothered to get out of your way.

You could not let Hongjoong go, not like this. It was really hard to tell what exactly he was for you, but he was on your mind often and you knew, your heart would regret it if you did not at least find the answer to the question. There was only one flight that matched the destination and it was already boarding.

You were panting and looking around, seeking the gate as you found it. Families, lovers, and friends still stood there, waving to their loved ones as they were about to go, following the guidance of the flight attendants.

There was only one figure that seemed hesitant, styled up not unlike the day you first saw him, a man in his mid-20s who had a style most would envy, pleasant but a little exciting without being too much. He held a small piece of luggage in his hand, the ticket in the other, and was looking out of the window.

“Hongjoong!” you screamed, you didn’t even try to do anything else.

You looked like a mess, your hair wild from running here, the blouse no longer tugged into the jeans and with slim socks mostly turned after chasing here.

When he turned around, the surprise was written all over his face.

“I will wait here for you”, you called out. “I am sorry,” you waved with your phone and he seemed to understand because slowly, finally that soft, shy smile spread over his lips.

“Sir, the flight has to leave, if you wish to board, you need to do so now,” the stewardess announced.

Hongjoong was just looking at you, his grin relaxed and he sighed.

“Ah sorry for the struggles I will have to take one flight later. I forgot something important,” he replied and without hesitation, walked towards you.

a/n: apology to everyone hoping for a different ending, i just had too much fun writing hwa as the guy who really just doesn't care about feelings and enjoys playing with people. then, I'm also a hongjoong bias. he just deserved a bit of luv since hwa in this piece has lots of admirers who gladly will step up 😭