#krispy clears out drafts

[spinelikericekrispy]

Was anyone gonna tell me Shoto & Endeavor’s blood types show they’re not related or…

[shawtuzi]

happy friday lovelies!!! here’s a little plug!eren drabble that’s been sitting in the drafts for idek how long it’s kinda inspired by ari fletchers cooking show lmao i love her

cw include: black coded reader, reader is a youtuber, some swearing, nothing too explicit mostly fluff, drug usage (they’re making edibles lol)

“is my hat straight renny?” you asked adjusting the chef hat on your head for the umpteenth time. eren hummed and tilted the hat a little to the left before giving you a grin, “yep it’s straight now hurry up and start this shit.” you rolled your eyes and quickly ran over to the camera to turn it on. today was a very special video because you were finally going to introduce eren to your thousands of followers!!! and what better way to do that than to have him do his favorite thing with you which is baking ofc. you cleared your throat before speaking, “hello my honey bunches welcome back to my channel! you may be wondering why i have this on,” you pointed to the chef hat, “and that’s because today we’re gonna be baking!! but not just any regular ol’ treats…they’re gonna be infused” you sent a sly wink to the camera making eren chuckle.

he couldn’t help but watch in awe as you talked to your viewers with such enthusiasm like you weren’t running on three hours of sleep and a starbucks strawberry lemonade refresher. “today i won’t be baking alone though i have a very special guest joining me,” you grabbed eren gently by the wrist and pulled him into the frame. eren sent a little wave to the camera muttering out a ‘sup’. you turned to him narrowing your eyes when you noticed he was missing a very important part of his outfit, “umm where’s your hat?” eren groaned throwing his head back like a toddler, “please don’t make me wear it it’ll give me hat hair.” you put your hand on your hip and gave eren the look and within seconds he was putting the chefs hat on with a dramatic huff.

you clapped your hands together and gave the camera a warm smile, “now that we have on the proper attire we can get started! today we’re gonna start simple and make some super yummy infused rice krispy treats, eren and i have already made our ‘butter’ and if you would like to know how to make that let me know in the comment section!” eren held up a small container showing the ‘butter’ to the viewers. “look how good this shit looks how could they not wanna know how to make it? make sure y’all comment down below or else,” you shook your head letting out a sigh, “eren please don’t threaten the viewers.”

eren kissed his teeth before setting the container down, “what’s the first step mama?” he asked leaning against the counter. “first things first we’re going to preheat our stove, eren already preheated ours so—” you stopped dead in your tracks when you realized the stove was in fact not hot. you turned to eren who was whistling and looking at the floor, “eren…” you spoke calmly tapping your manicured fingers against the marble counter. “yes?” he asked giving you them damn puppy dog eyes. “why isn’t the stove preheated? i asked you to do it before we started,” eren was prepared to give you the excuse of a lifetime but you stopped him as soon as the words ‘well what had happened was’ left his mouth.

“ah geez okay well while we wait for the stove to get hot let me tell you a little about my co star here. for those of you who are new here or don’t follow me on insta this is my boyfriend eren! we’ve been together about three years and they’ve been the best years of my life it’s never dull moment with him,” you got on the tips of your toes to give eren’s cheek a kiss making him smile. “he usually stays behind the scenes when i do my videos but today volunteered to join me,” eren laughed a little too loud and you turned to him raising an eyebrow. “what’s so damn funny?” you asked cocking your head to the side. eren put his hand on his hip like he’s seen you do so many times before speaking, “if by volunteered you mean being held against my will to do this then i totallyyyy volunteered.” you slapped his chest making him let out a dramatic whine, “i would like to set the record straight that he is not being held against his will please don’t call paw patrol yall he’s fine.”

after a few more minutes of playful banter between the two of you the stove was finally hot enough to begin baking. eren grabbed the camera and focused in on you but not before holding it veryyyy close to your forehead, “are you having fun ren?” you asked and he nodded with a smile on his face. you let out another loud sigh before getting back to the task at hand. “okayyy first thing we’re gonna do is add our ‘butter’ now don’t be stingy with it but also don’t put a whole lot in there unless you wanna be holding onto the ground for dear life,” you put about two scoops of the faux butter into the pot.

“now just let it melt and when it’s all melted we’re gonna add these!” you held up a bag of pink and white marshmallows when you noticed someone had already gotten into them. “boy you’ve got to be kidding me,” eren couldn’t help but giggle at the exasperated look on your face. “i had the munchies don’t be mad there’s still enough,” you grabbed a handful of marshmallows out of the bag and threw them at eren. you muttered out a ‘okay biggums’ to which eren responded by giving your ass a quick smack. “i heard that shit don’t call me biggums,” you waved him off before walking back to the pot of melted butter.

“alrighty now that our ‘butter’ has melted let’s add some marshmallows!” you poured a decent amount into the pot but not before popping a few in your mouth. “oh you can eat some but i can’t?” eren asked zooming the camera in on your face. you kissed your teeth and shook your head, “your greedy ass got into them before we even started the video i don’t wanna hear nun!” eren turned the camera to himself with a the fakest pout you’ve ever seen on his face, “y’all see how she treats me? she might actually hate me.”

“mhm…okay anyways now we’re gonna slowly mix the butter and marshmallows together until completely smooth,” you grabbed a rubber spatula and began mixing the marshmallows and butter together. eren had gotten so wrapped up in watching you mix he didn’t even realize the camera was now pointed at the ground giving your viewers a nice shot of his pink crocs with sanrio gibbits. “um eren” you spoke breaking him out of his trance. “all my viewers are getting is shot of your big ass feet,” eren let out a quiet ‘oh shit’ before pointing the camera back to you. “well it’s too late i’m already done mixing!” you threw your hands up in defeat. eren pointed the camera back to his crocs, “well as long as i got the camera on them y’all can’t tell me these muhfuckas ain’t hard. we need to normalize men liking sanrio!” eren was possibly the worst cameraman in history.

you grabbed the camera pointing it back to you, “anywayssss now let’s add the rice krispies. the most efficient way to do it without spillage is using a measuring cup,” you added three cups of the cereal to the pot. you turned the oven on low before beginning to mix the ingredients together, “eren it’s getting a little hard to mix, you mind taking over?” eren let out a hum before handing you the camera. “this is the most important part you really wanna get that shit mixed in well,” eren said matter of factly. “then when it’s done we’re gonna bring it over here and pour it into this pan,” eren walked over to the glass dish you had already set out and began to slowly scoop the rice krispy treats onto it.

you set the camera back up and quickly scurried to eren’s side, wrapping your arm around his waist. “we’re gonna let these cool for just a few minutes until then why don’t we answer some questions from the subscribers!” you pulled out your phone and opened your notes app, “eren doesn’t know this but i posted on my sorry a while ago and asked you guys to send in some questions for a potential q&a and that potential q&a is happening right now!” eren grabbed the bag of marshmallows and leant against the counter, “ask me anything you want i’m an open book.”

“the first question is: ‘how did you guys meet?’” eren looked at the ceiling in thought before speaking, “i was selling a particular product she was interested in…i thought she was really pretty so i threw in a little extra and the rest was history.” you swooned when you thought of how you met eren for the first time. it’s insane how intimidating he was the first time you met him now he refers to himself an a “sanrio boy”. “next question is: how did you know you liked me?’”

the corners of eren’s mouth lifted up as he thought of his answer. “well we were at a block party one weekend and i was her ‘date’ everything was going fine till i saw some tool tryna cuddle up to her,” you hunched over in laughter remembering the terrified look on the poor guys face when eren approached him. “to make a long story short i beat his ass, did some reflecting on why i did that, and soon enough i made y/n mine and only mine. next question!” eren popped a couple marshmallows in his mouth obviously proud with his answer.

“okay okay last question for right now: ‘what’s one ick you both have towards each other?’” before eren could open his mouth you piped up with a quick ‘me first!’ eren rolled his eyes popping another handful of marshmallows in his mouth. “my ick is how ugly your feet are,” eren nearly choked on the marshmallows when he heard your answer. “excuse me?!” he yelled tossing the marshmallows aside. you pulled your lips into a line looking in the other direction, “baby you know i think you’re the most gorgeous man on the planet….but your feet are hideous they literally make me nauseous.” eren quickly snatched up the camera and was about to kick off his crocs and socks but you took the camera back just as fast setting it back up, “you are not about to scar my viewers no way sir. now go ahead and tell me you’re ick let’s get this shit over with.”

eren huffed and crossed his arms over his chest, “i was gonna say i had no ick for you but now that you’ve talked shit on my feet i’m gonna have to say my ick for you is how loud you snore!” you gasped at eren’s words your mouth dropping open. “i do nawt snore,” you growled balling your hands into fists. “yeah yeah whatever you say i’m surprised such a loud obnoxious sound can come from someone so cute and cuddly,” you were about to rebuttal but instead you shook your head and calmly got back to the task at hand.

“now that our rice krispy treats are nice and cool now it’s time for the best part: tasting it!” you grabbed a knife and cut out two pieces for you and eren. eren reached to grab one but you quickly pulled your hand away narrowing your eyes, “take back what you said about my snoring.” eren scoffed and got reallll up in your face you couldn’t believe how much audacity he had! “i’ll take that back as soon as you take back the feet comment” you both stared at each other before eren surprisingly broke first. “fine fine! i take it back just gimme the damn treat,” you have him the rice krispy treat and a nice little kiss on the cheek. “isn’t he just the sweetest guys,” you smiled giving eren another kiss on the cheek.

“let’s bite in synch okay one…two…eren!” you were absolutely dumbfounded when eren had taken a massive bite before you even got to three. “these are good nice job baby,” he said with a mouthful of the delicious treat. you took a bite muttering out a ‘thanks’, they were in fact very delicious. so delicious you both ate another and then split one. “we’re gonna take a quick break and we will report back to you when the treats have done their thing!” you turned off the camera and let out a loud sigh when you realized how much editing you had to do meanwhile eren seemed to be in good spirits.

“i think that went well hm?” he smiled wrapping his arms around your waist, giving your forehead a sweet kiss. “do you know how much editing i’m gonna have to do renny? i hateee editing,” you pouted nuzzling your face into his chest. eren shook his head and cupped your face with his hands, gently stroking your cheeks. “let’s not worry about that right now let’s focus on how fucked up we’re about to be we ate probably more than we should’ve,” he said glancing at the half eaten pan of edibles. “oof you’re right let’s worry about that later.”

about two hours later you and eren had somehow ended up on the living room floor both completely blazed out of your minds. “eren….” you mumbled craning your neck to look at him. “y/n…” he said back turning his head to look at you. you cracked a small smile and suddenly both of you burst into a fit of laughter. “we…we gotta finish the video baby,” you giggled sitting up. eren groaned before sitting up as well but as soon as he got up he stumbled and fell flat on his face, “m’gonna lay here a minute.” you gave eren’s ass a smack before getting up, making your way to the camera.

“well besties as you can see those treats clearly worked,” you said zooming in on your bloodshot eyes. you then turned the camera to eren whose face was still smushed into the carpet, “actually they worked a little too well.” you turned the camera back to yourself letting out a small yawn, “well until then stay tuned for my next video i can’t quite remember what it is right now so i guess it’ll be a surprise when i post! catch y’all on the flip side!” you turned the camera off and tossed it on the counter before collapsing next to eren. “good work sweetums,” you mumbled to which he replied with a muffled ‘you too sexy’.

[dgennk]

Undertale: Saving Dreemurrs - Halloween

NOTICE: [I just wanted to write something and post it, to get back into writing. I’m working on an AU for Undertale, cause that’s captured my heart since January, and I just wanted to get my toe wet on something silly. Why Halloween? Cause I had some white Reese’s when I was thinking this up. Maybe I’ll rewrite it for Halloween this year? Anyway, thank you for reading, any constructive criticism would be helpful.]  Friday October 31st, Halloween. 

Within the Underground, this date held no special worth, just another day to live for the next. On the surface however, this date marked a special occasion. As the sun would set, children and adults alike would leave their homes, adorned in costumes for one goal. 

Sugar rush inducing, cavity spawning, sweet candy. 

Sour, bitter, tooth-rotting sweet. Candies and confections were prepared and bought for costumed humans of the night.

Today this tradition held strong, especially with the inclusion of monsters that once called the Underground their home.

This could be merrily seen within the Dreemurr abode, as its children returned from hours of trick-or-treating. Four children scrambled into HOME with pillow cases filled to bursting with sugary delights.

“Your outerwear, children!” their trailing guardian, Toriel, reminds as she shuts the door behind her. 

“Yes mom!” “Got it!” and “Yes, Ms. Toriel!” choired the children, closely followed with the shuffle of clothing. Scarves and jackets, tossed at the basket beside the second entryway, the act hardly slowed their rush.

With a skip into the foyer, Frisk kicks off his final boot and breaks for the right hall. “Last in trades free!”

“Huh?” Asriel gasps while MK lets out an indignant ‘Dood!’ Only for them to be left behind by the other human child.

Chara cackles, their foam forked tail wiping as they turned the corner.

The two boys scramble to give chase, neither willing to part with their treasured trove.

Toriel hummed as she hung her snaily shawl a step from the door. A light thud had her eyes flutter but the bleat that proceeded drew a knowing smile. “Perhaps,” she muses, “I should unveil it a tad earlier.” Her smile grew. 

“That wasn’t fair,” mumbled Asriel, sitting at the center circle mat, sack of candy buried in his lap. He rubbed his snout, slightly bruised from his fumble.

“Come on dude, don’t be sore,” Mk laughed beside him, his candy sack untied from his chest.  “Your mom’s dress was just too long!”

“I needed it for my costume!” proclaimed the prince fervently. He threw his arms around his bag and dug his face deep. It worked in tandem with his wide-brim green hat to obscure his downcast look. “And, it’s a robe, not a dress.” 

“But like,” MK began, a brow risen with a perplexed twist of the snout. “Could have made it shorter.”

“That,” chimed Chara with a playful smile, reclined on the far right bed. “Wouldn’t be authentic.”

A groan escaped the hidden boss monster. “Chara, please stop teasing.”

The jester’s smile grew. “Okay, Az.” Bells jingled with their chuckle. 

Frisk tapped his painted chin in thought, face turned up for the starry-blue ceiling. He hummed and nodded then headed for the down prince. “I change my mind,” he leans down, while reaching a blue hand into his right pocket.

“Hm? Frisk?” The prince peered up.

“Here,” The child placed a treat on Asriel’s bag. A blackish ball, about the size of a doughnut hole, with ovid sprinkles topped on its shell. It was inside a clear twist wrapper, no labels to be seen.

“Where did we get those?” Chara mumbled aloud, with a lean to peer over.

A small smile came over Asriel’s mostly shaded visage as he accepted the gift. “Thanks Frisk.” He opened the wrapping, it was hard and didn’t smell much like anything. He still appreciated it all the same. He slipped it between his teeth and took a small crunch to it.

His reaction was a bit of a surprise to the others watching. 

Chara paused to stare, wide-eyed. Their brother had taken to the candy well. No, that was an understatement. The boss monster moaned in delight, holding his cheeks as whatever piece of confectionery in his mouth seemed to overload his senses. She couldn’t help but twist her head at Frisk, only to stare, numb from his expression. His eyes gleamed scarlet in the shadow of his hair, a telling smile etched onto his face. “... Frisk?”

“Azz, dood,” MK calls, “WHAT is that?”

The boss monster only groaned before turning his head with a bob. “Oh,” he muttered lightly, his voice muffled somewhat. “It's greht, like moh’s pie, but,” he pauses to savor the taste on his tongue. “It's tahfy!”

“Eh?”

“Hey Asriel!” the rubber-clad Dreemurr smiled wider. “You can have more if you want!!” 

“Critical hit!” Chara grunted.

“You ghot more?!” Asriel bursts to his feet, his own candy forgotten to the floor. 

Hook. The thin smile on Frisk’s face had blossomed into a face-splitting grin. “Yeah, a dozen if you wanna trade!”

“Oh,” pauses Asriel, “Righht! Uhm… Do you have sohmethhing in mihnd?”

Line! “Well…” he draws it out before clicking his teeth. “How many of those big Reese's do you have?!”

DEVIL! Chara screams internally.

“Oh, those,” Asriel smiles brightly. “Papyrus and Undyne were giving out the really big stuff, they gave me 5. I think they were… jumbo?” he trailed, unsure and flustered. He hadn’t really read the packages at the time. He perked quick though, beaming. “You can have them! If you want?”

“Yes! Yeah!!” Frisk chirps while pulling a white bag from his candy sack. With palpable eagerness he presents it forward to the prince, only for both to stumble. A blur swooped between and snatched it, leaving the two at a loss!

Chara’s glower twinkled, standing high on the bed parallel to the other. “You sneak!” she accuses. “No one gave us these on our route! Where did you get them?”

Frisk’s brows pulled down with his angry expression. “You can’t take my trade candy! Give it back!”

“You had these since the start, didn’t you!?” Chara ignored Frisk’s demand and instead placed the bag behind their back, their other hand pointed at the miffed blue munchkin.

“N-No I didn’t!” protested Frisk.

“You’re a bad liar!” She giggled angrily in retort.

“Come on guys!” MK yawned at them. “Let’s just start eating candy already!”

Frisk whips his hand out to point at Chara, squinted eyes burning red hot, “Not until Chara lets me get my Jumbo Recess!”

“Your Jumbo Recess?!” Chara repeated with a haughty laugh. “You knew I was going to trade for them! I always trade with Asriel!”

Now the youngest Dreemur pulls back, arms crossed over their chestplate. “I didn’t forget! I got something for you too!” he ends in a huff.

“Wait, what?” blinked Chara.

“I was gonna trade for your Rice Krispie Treats with this!” he finds and reaches into his candy-sack. After a shuffle he takes a deeper reach inside and withdraws an oval shaped treat, just a few inches shorter than his face, covered in a clear wrinkled wrapping.

Chara was speechless, arms falling slack.

“Where did you get that giant egg! Is that chocolate?!” Mk was right by it, looking over the super-sized egg thing.

“I got it from the store,” Frisk started with a matter-of-fact tone. “It was pretty hollow but mom helped me put cream inside, so it’s like those egg things you get from dad.”

“Cadbury... Eggs.” Chara slowly corrects. Realization struck her brain. Frisk and mom had made this for them. 

Her heart swelled in the chest, rosy cheeks now venetian despite the grey paint. “Hey…” She couldn’t look Frisk in the eyes. “Sorry.”

“Trade this for your Rice Krispies and we good!” the boy gave a thumbs up.

“Sheesh,” Chara smiled, and reached for the bag she dropped. “I get it, I get it.” She didn’t meet a paper bag, instead her hands landed upon something fuzzy. She blinked and looked down.

Asriel was draped over his bed. Where the bag once was, his head was now. His green hat now on the floor, forgotten. He was chewing groggily, half-lidded eyes gazing at nothing in particular while a large mass of stringy, sticky taffy laid within his maw. Wrappers with nothing inside laid all over the bed. The bag was on the floor now, torn open.  

Frisk grinned.

MK laughed.

Chara groans.

“...Uh?” Asriel tried to speak, however, the tough candy made it embarrassingly difficult.

“Hey dude!” Mk, popped in front of Frisk excitingly. “You got something big you can trade me?!”

“Fufufu!” The child laughs in the manner of a hero. He turned to Chara and handed them the monster of a creme egg. Then, he turned around and walked to his sack, shrouding it from prying eyes.

MK waited with a held breath as the human slowly rose, his arms held before him but close to hide what laid in his hands. 

“Are you ready for this?” Frisk asked anonymously. He didn’t need to look back, he could feel the intensity of MK’s nods. He could hear the whisper of their draft. “Then get ready…

For the dragon!!”

“YOOOOOO!” Frisk had unveiled a stupidly thick gummy in the crude shape of a dragon head, about the size of, again, Frisk’s face.

“Where did you get these?” Chara balked.

Frisk closed eyes glinted and presented the gummy head with one hand and pointed at the star-struck monster. “For your ring pops, I’ll give you this! Deal?”

MK had like 8 of those. 

“Deal!”

With the transaction concluded, Frisk happily handed the massive wyrm head to the monster who lifted it with his maw alone.

“Fris-” Before Chara could repeat her question, a knock came at the door, drawing all the children’s attention.

A laugh came as the door knob was turned. “I’m sorry to interrupt in on the fun-oh!” Toriel paused, seeing the state of the four. “I can see you’ve already begun trading. Well, I have to ask you to finish your candy for the time being.”

“Uh?” MK whines, gummy the size of a fist in his mouth. “Ow cooh?”

She couldn’t help her excitement. “Well, It was for the party later this evening, but I had so many ingredients I made a second chocolate pumpkin and snail pie!” she clapped. “I thought we could share that between ourselves before the rest arrive.” 

The looks on Chara and Asriel’s faces would always confuse Frisk. Pumpkin and chocolate sounded good but they had a feeling there would be more snail out of the three.

“Hael?” MK questioned. 

Asriel was first on his feet this time, a blur of rainbow met everyone in the room as he dashed out first.

“H-Hey! Wait Asriel!” Chara leapt after them. And MK soon followed after, though with far less enthusiasm than before. This left Toriel and Frisk.

The Boss Monster could only be amused by her child’s expression. She reaches out her hand. “Do not worry,” she gave a wink. “I had made a slice with no snails for yourself.”

And with that Frisk beams, racing for their mother and gripping her hand tight. They were all-but dragging her out now, a toothy smile on their face.

Toriel laughed, “my, my.” And closed the door behind them, to go enjoy a treat with her children.

[blueinkblot]

Open-Hearted

@write-it-motherfuckers Okay! This is the draft I turned in for my writing class, and while I think it could be a lot better I didn’t want to keep you waiting too much longer.

I should have known things would go badly when my childhood “coven” reconvened over winter break.

“C’mon, it’ll be fun,” I said, pulling at Eliot’s hand. “Ceels even said she found a real grimoire by a real witch.”

“With the way things were,” Eliot said, digging her heels into the decaying rug in the O’Connor’s back room, “who even knows if she’s a real witch?”

“You could say the same about us,” Celia said, walking into the room with a decaying book in one hand that was at least eight inches thick. She carried a silver platter of lemon cookies in the other. “Just three twenty-something hipsters playing around with things they don’t understand.”

Really, we weren’t a coven. There were three of us: myself, with a main skill set involving little magicks like lighting lights or clearing dust; my friend Celia, whose magick focused on intuition and the mind; and our mutual friend Eliot, whose magick was physical (healing, speed, and reflexes). The three of us had parted ways after graduating high school and gone off to college.

“Hey, I don’t know about you, but I’m getting stronger,” Eliot said, flexing her left arm. “The guys in the shop are starting to actually seem impressed with how much I can lift by myself.”

“Yeah, well, don’t show off or anything,” Celia pouted. “Sit down and let’s get started.”

She let the grimoire fall onto the steamer trunk that sat in the middle of the small room, and a cloud of dust shot out from between the pages.

“Smells old,” Eliot said through a cough, flapping a hand in front of her face to clear the air.

“Clara,” I murmured, pointing a finger at the dust. As quickly as I could have snapped my fingers the dust was gone.

“Oooh, look at you, Rhi,” Celia said. “Is that new?”

“Improved,” I said, pointing a finger at her. “I can now clean my room… slightly faster than I used to be able to.”

Silence fell over the room, and Celia took a cookie off of the plate she was holding. I reached for the book, only for her to put the plate down onto the steamer trunk so that her arm was blocking me from touching the book.

“Rhiannon Grace Adler, have a cookie or two before we get into the occult,” she said in a faux-Southern drawl as she often did.

“Yes, mom,” I said, taking two and getting powdered sugar all over my black pants.

“Okay, now that we’ve all had a little sustenance we can get into the fun stuff,” Celia said, dusting her hands off and flinging crumbs to the floor before sitting down in the wicker chair behind her. She undid the two brass latches on the grimoire with careful fingers and opened to the first page.

“This being the collection of magyck  - magick spelled M-A-G-Y-C-K, guys - gathered by one Prudence Goode in the year 1721.”

Eliot and I ooohed at this.

“Okay, find something good for us to try,” I said, watching Celia scrutinize the first page. She skimmed through a dozen pages and then paused, tapping her finger against the page.

“Here’s a good one, Teleportation of the Body and Mind.”

“Do me! Do me! Do me!” I said, bouncing in my seat.

Celia gave me a withering look. “No thanks, you’re my friend. And I have a boyfriend.”

I snorted at her and Eliot nearly fell off of the settee she was sitting on in laughter.

“Shut up, you know what I meant,” I pouted.

“Yes, I did,” she said with a warm smile. “Mistress Eliot, are you ready?”

“Yes.” Eliot wiggled on her seat and sat up straight.

“Mistress Rhiannon, are you ready?”

“If you insist,” I said, faux-annoyed.

“And I’m ready. Rhi, you wanna be the guinea pig?”

“Yup!” I jumped up from my seat and stood next to the trunk. “Shoot me off to Canada!”

“Canada’s too far,” Celia whined. “I’ll send you, like, next door. Freak the Neils out.”

She and Eliot joined hands, and they peered at the book on the side table.

“Guess it’s time to remember my Latin,” Eliot said. “On three?”

She counted herself and Celia off, and they read through the chant three times as the instructions, well, instructed.

“Feel anything?” Celia asked, opening one of her eyes and looking up at me.

“…I feel kind of tingly.”

“Keep going,” Eliot said, nodding towards the book.

They resumed the chant, and they were halfway through the second repetition before I was tossed in the air.

I was about ten feet in the air when I reappeared and had only a moment to panic before gravity decided that it was once again interested in me. I landed on my front, my breath knocked out of me, and groaned as I tried to take stock of myself. Fortunately, it seemed I had my arms and legs. Unfortunately, it seemed I didn’t know where I was.

The floor beneath my hands was cold and hard, and though I couldn’t see it I would have bet money that I had fallen onto a stone floor.

So the spell worked, I thought, but where am I?

“Who’s there?” A male voice called, and I felt a cool shiver run down my spine. The sound of footsteps drew nearer, and finally I saw the light of a lamp bobbing towards me. As the figures got closer, I could see a woman a few inches shorter than me holding the lantern and, beside her, a tall man draped in a long, dark cloak. His face looked pale in the yellow lamplight, but I was sure it was just my eyes playing tricks on me.

“It would seem we have a guest,” he said, heels clicking against the floor as they moved towards me. I scrambled to my feet before they reached me.

“I’m sorry for trespassing,” I said, holding up my hands. “I didn't mean to disturb you, I’ll just leave - ”

I reached for the door and pulled it open, only for a flash of lightning and peal of thunder to make me jump back in surprise.

“This is not suitable weather for traveling,” the man said. “Please, stay.”

“I couldn’t impose.”

“I insist,” the man said, inclining his head.

I finally nodded and shut the solid wooden door.

“How did you get here?” The man asked, looking down towards me.

“Magic,” I confessed. “Bad, accidental magic out of an old grimoire my friend found.”

“Magic?” His brow furrowed. “I haven’t seen magic in a long time.”

“How long?”

“It must have been… oh, 270 years?”

I felt the warmth drain from my face. “What?!”

He caught my expression and laughed. “I forgot to introduce myself. I am Count Dracula, and I welcome you to my home.”

I leapt away from him. “Dracula.” My chest felt tight and my mind was racing. “You’re a vampire.”

“Indeed.” He looked over, his expression cool but surprised. “How did you know that?”

For a moment I struggled to come up with an answer. “Where I come from, there are a lot of stories about you.”

He turned to me, holding out a hand. “Madame - ”

“Don’t get any closer.” The middle finger of the hand I was holding up between me and him lit on fire.

He sighed impatiently. “Mâdâlena, please show our guest to the lavender room near my chambers.”

The woman who’d been carrying the torch before returned and gestured for me to follow her. She had greying dark brown hair that was wound into a bun that was slowly falling apart, and she wiped her hands off on an apron.

“This way miss,” she said in a soft, even voice.

The room was quiet - tapestries hung from the walls that deadened the sound and there were heavy draperies that hung around the tall, four-postered bed.

“I’ll find a nightgown for you to wear, and when I return I’ll light a fire.”

“Thank you,” I called as she turned and left the room.

I sat down on the bed, surprised when it didn’t give like a mattress might but instead crackled as though I were sitting on Rice Krispies.

When Mâdâlena returned, she had not only what she’d promised but a strange, wooden device in the shape of a ’t’. As I watched, she beckoned for me to stand up, then used the device to pull at strings strung through the side of the bed. She moved to the fireplace and soon a fire was warming the room.

“I found this,” she said. “It may be a bit long, but hopefully it will fit you.”

I took the gown and marveled at the detailing around the neck. “Thank you, again,” I said, hating the way my voice shook.

She nodded once then pulled a brass pan from the end of the bed. “I will fill the bed warmer and then I will go,” she said. “Do not hesitate to call if you need anything more.”

I watched her scoop some of the glowing embers into the pan, then slide the pan under the sheets. “Simply remove it when the sheets become warm.”

The way she was instructing me about these unfamiliar tools and the formal tone of her voice caused tears to spring to my eyes.

“Thank you.”

She nodded one more time, then turned and left, this time for good.

“God I’m such an idiot,” I said, feeling my throat tie into a knot as I scrubbed at my eyes with the heel of my hand. “I’m never going to get home.”

Then it was just like the dam burst. The guilt over how Celia and Eliot must be feeling plus the hopelessness of being stuck in Transylvania in the year who-knows-when plus the gut-wrenching fear of being holed up in the domicile of the most famous vampire on the planet - vampires, whom I never would have guessed were real just this morning - who could suck me dry at any moment. Especially now that it was nighttime and I was starting to feel sleepy. Tears ran down my cheeks and I tried to keep the sobbing to the minimum - who knows what the master of the house could hear - but I could only do so much.

I changed into the nightgown and immediately felt myself break out in goosebumps. Despite the fire, there was still a draft coming from somewhere in the room. Eventually, as Mâdâlena suggested, I pulled the bed warmer out of the sheets and placed it near the fire. Then I pulled back the sheets, slid in, and tried to convince myself to fall asleep.

Apparently I did fall asleep, because at some point in the darkest point of the night I was startled out of a dream by the prickly feeling of my magic. I sat up, gasping and clutching the sheets like a lifeline.

There, outlined by the soft torchlight of the hall, was Dracula. I could see two faint red pinpricks in the dark that moved just slightly before he turned and left the room, the door shutting behind him.

In the morning I redressed in my modern clothes and found a note on my dresser asking me to return to the hall in which I’d landed. As often happened in unfamiliar places, I didn’t sleep well that night. My back ached, and I was still slightly grumpy from not having slept well.

In the hall there now was a long, glossy wooden table laid out with shining silver plates of food. I stopped in the entryway to the hall, and the count looked my way before standing.

“I apologize for spooking you last night,” the count said, not even blinking. “It’s… been so long since I last had guests.”

“This is so much food,” I murmured. “I can’t possibly even eat a fraction of it.”

I took spoonfuls of the plates of food that I recognized - potatoes, greens, and a dark meat I didn’t recognize - before pouring a gravy over the whole plate. My throat grew tight as I pulled the chair out and sat down.

He’s going to wait until you’re full and sleepy, and then he’s going to jump you.

I felt my stomach twist in anxiety.

I looked up from the food and felt myself begin to shake as I noticed the count’s eyes on my. I raised another bite to my mouth, and then I felt something inside me snap.

The fork clattered back to the plate and I felt my chest constrict as I let out a sob.

I buried my head in my hands as I felt warm tears streak down my cheeks. A hand touched my shoulder and I gasped, flinching away from the touch.

“Please,” I sobbed, “Please, I don’t want to die!”

It felt like the room was crumpling around me, and my heart felt like it was going to beat out of my chest.

I heard a soft “oh,” no more that an exhalation of breath, and then the sound of the count’s shoes against the floor.

Just breathe, I thought to myself. Five things I can see…

I peeked through my fingers as I tried to regain control of my breathing and noticed that the count stood ramrod-straight a few paces away.

Finally I could sit up and just try to breathe. I wiped the tears away and took a few more gulping breaths of air.

“I, um, apologize for panicking,” I said, unable to meet the count’s eyes. “I shouldn’t have assumed you were going to bite me.”

“It is a natural conclusion,” he answered, expression solemn. “Though I must admit, I was worried you would curse me if I tried anything.”

I couldn’t help the smile that grew on my face. “That’s kind of funny, but I don’t know that much magic. All I can do right now is - ”

I lifted a hand. Dust flew into the air as I vanished it, and the lights grew a little brighter.

“Little things.”

“If you wish to learn more,” the count said, “I believe I know a sorcerer who used to come by every so often.”

“What happened to him?”

“The townspeople. I’m afraid I am the only supernatural creature left here - the rest were driven out.”

“Where does your friend live?” I asked.

“Siberia, I believe.”

“Siberia?!”

“And quite isolated, too.”

“Oh, that makes sense.” I bit my lip. “If you wouldn’t mind, I would love to learn from him. Maybe he can help me get home.” The count looks crestfallen for just a moment, but then straightened up once more. “I will send him a letter this evening.”

“How’s it going to get to him in Siberia?”

He said nothing, only raising his arm. Down from the high, shadowed ceilings of the castle swooped a bird, and when it landed a glossy black raven stood on his arm.

“Meet Noapte.”

“Hey,” I breathed, reaching a hand out. Noapte cawed but didn’t snap at me as I petted his head. I met the count’s gaze. “You’re going to send a note by raven?”

“Yes.”

“And how long should it take for your friend to arrive?”

“I suppose…. About a month?”

I nearly choked. “A month?”

“He’ll have to travel in secret.” The count’s tone revealed that he was surprised that I was surprised.

“My goodness.”

“Come, I’ll show you the study.”

As in the hall the ceiling was higher than expected, but instead of the lingering chill the room seemed to be radiating warmth. Bookcases stretched towards the ceiling like trees, and titles embossed on some of the spines glittered in the low light like sunlight off of water.

The count moved further into the room, and I forgot my nerves in a moment of breathless awe. While he moved over towards the large desk sitting towards the back of the room, I hurried over to the shelves.

The first book I pulled out was in a beautiful, clean hand, and it took a moment of staring before I realized it was in Latin.

“The Scientia Rerum,” he said. “You know Latin?”

“It’s been a while,” I said, smiling down at the pages. “But I can pick things out here and there.”

As badly as I wanted to run my fingers over the illuminated letters and the brilliant illustrations, I knew I’d be crushed if I did anything to ruin the books.

“Concerning the - adjunctum? Oh, that’s properties - properties of all things relating to the Earth.” I looked up from the pages. “This is alchemy, then?”

“It certainly sounds like it,” the count said, head bowed in focus as he wrote with precise, deft strokes.

“Have you ever tried anything from any of your books?”

“Once or twice.” He finished a phrase with an exact tap on the page.

“It would be fascinating to try and see if any of the combinations the alchemists detail could actually work,” I said, running my fingers against the ragged edge of the page.

“And how would you do that?”

“Set up some equipment, run the reaction, and note the result.” I met his gaze and shrugged. “It’s not too different from what I’ve done in the laboratory.”

“You study?”

“Biochemistry.” I shrugged again. Did I usually shrug this much? “I, uh… it has to do with the human body. Figuring out its deepest secrets.”

“Try the red book on the fifth shelf there,” the count advised, pointing with the end of his quill.

I put the book back in its place and reached for the book he’d noted. Opening it - it too was in Latin - but there was a drawing of the full body with notes around it.

I flicked through some of the pages and then closed the book. “This is… amazing. Thank you.”

He’s pouring something from a small spoon onto the now rolled-up note. The count removed a ring and pressed it into the - oh, that was wax - before meeting my gaze.

“Is that a seal?”

“It is my family’s crest.”

I walked over to the desk and watched as he wiggled the ring out of the wax. There, in the red wax, was the image of a dragon curled around a sword.

I walked over to a chair in the room and sat down to read the book, tucking my legs underneath me. After a few pages of semi-understood Latin, the count stood up and called Noapte. He held out the note to the bird, who took it, then left the room.

When he returns he pauses just inside the doorway. “I never asked your name, and for that I apologize.”

I try to hold back an impending smile. “I’m Rhiannon - uhm, Adler,” I said, “but my friends call me Rhi.”

He inclined his head. “Adler… that is German, yes?”

“Yes. But I’m not from Germany, I’m from… elsewhere.”

The count gave me a curious look but didn’t press.

“In Romanian, that would be vulturul.”

“Really?” I watch him for a second. “Would you teach me some Romanian? I feel uneasy not knowing any on my own.”

He considered me for a second, then nodded.

A couple of weeks later I was headed out to the market with Mâdâlena to fetch a few things. While I wasn’t by any means proficient at Romanian, I could pick a few words out here and there.

“Try this.” Mâdâlena swung a heavy cloak around my shoulders, and then fastened the clasp at my throat.

I hummed as I felt myself grow warm. “Oh, that’s much better. Thank you.” I looked down at the clasp. “Dragons?”

“The master’s sigil.” She picked up the basket she had set down to help me. “Now come, we should get things done.”

I could hear the sounds of the marketplace not long after we left the castle. Mâdâlena carried on as was her routine, but I paused at the edge of the bridge over the chasm that divided the castle from the rest of the town and looked back at the castle. The count was looking out from one of the upper windows, and I just looked for a moment before turning and following Mâdâlena.

The first few stalls entailed me following Mâdâlena as she scrutinized the produce the townspeople were offering, speaking in fluid Romanian as she bartered and purchased. Then, finally, we came to a stall selling fabric.

I sort of spaced out when Mâdâlena started talking to the vendor, and wandered to the edge of the stall.

As she wrapped things up, I noticed a group of men looking my way and pointing at the clasp on the cloak.

“Mâdâlena,” I murmured, “what are those men saying?”

She didn’t look over at them but instead began to listen. “They’re talking about how you’re wearing the master’s sigil. And…” She listened for a moment longer. “We should head back to the castle. I do not like how they are speaking about you.”

She collected the fabric and handed it to me. We turned on our heels and walked back the way we came.

Once we reached the entry hall of the castle Mâdâlena put her hands on my shoulders. “They said something about ‘I thought we drove the last of the monsters from the village’ and then another man said something about raiding the castle.”

I covered my mouth with a hand. “Mâdâlena - ”

“It’s not something you should worry about. I will tell the master.”

“That’s not going to make me worry about it any less,” I muttered as she walked away.

Three days later Peytr, the count’s sorcerer acquaintance, arrived at the castle.

“I hear you’ve had some magic trouble,” he said.

“My friends teleported me a long way from home thanks to a mishap,” I answered.

“Now, I don’t know how much Vlad has told you - ”

“Vlad?”

“The count.”

“Ah.”

“I don’t know how much he’s told you, but I can’t help by reversing the spell, only by helping you trace out the remainders of the spell and try to reverse it. I can help you improve your magic in a similar way.”

“Please,” I said. “I haven’t been taught very much - apparently there were rumors that an ancestor of mine had magic, but it hasn’t manifested in a few generations. My mother wasn’t surprised that I had magic, though.”

Peytr inclined his head. “Good. Now, if you wouldn’t mind…?”

He held out both of his hands and I placed mine in them. He cocked his head to one side as though he was listening to a faint sound, and then he straightened up after a long moment.

“A simple transportation spell,” he pronounced, “though how you were sent this far from home, I’m not sure…”

“Can it be reversed?”

“Oh, most certainly. I say “simple”, but your friends’ magic is strong enough that returning home should be like following a well-worn path. We may, however, have to bolster your magic ability.”

That was the start of the growth of my magic skills. Peytr was of the opinion that, not only should I strengthen what magic I intrinsically had, but I should also develop my defensive and offensive magic.

And so we did. Somewhat like fencing, he started with exercises and drills, and then worked until we could wordlessly spar.

“Vlad,” Peytr said one day, “how would you feel about fighting Rhiannon?”

If a vampire could pale, he did just then. “Absolutely not,” he said. “I fear I would hurt her."

Peytr and I shared a look.

I flicked a finger towards the count. He jerked, frowning down at his left side as though someone had poked him. I did it again, and finally he looked up to see my poorly-hidden grin.

“Miss Adler,” he protested, but I sent a breeze his way.

“Have it your way,” he murmured, and sped towards me.

I raised my hands in front of me, willing the air to harden around me as a defense. I felt the shock against my magic as the count ran into it. He gave me a curious glance before trying something else. I pressed my hand out and blocked him once more before I felt Peytr’s magic sneaking towards me. I blocked it, and that was when Vlad knocked me over.

“What happened?”

“Peytr distracted me,” I said, sending a half-assed glare his way. He simply smirked back.

“I apologize for knocking you over,” he said, extending a hand. I took it and got back to my feet.

“Overall, I still think that was quite successful, Rhiannon, don’t you?”

“Oh, of course,” I said, pulling my gaze away from Vlad. “But I still feel like I can do more.”

And so that was how my days went. Magic training, a midday meal, and then more language lessons with the count.

One day, as I was making notes on the alchemy text Vlad had given me to read, he entered the room and began work of his own at the other end of the desk.

“Meu vulturul, would you pass me the folio next to you?”

Without thinking about it, I picked up the folio he was referring to and then processed what he’d said. “Sorry, what?”

“What?”

“What did you say?”

“Oh.” He averted his gaze. “I called you ‘my eagle.’”

“Like my last name, I remember now.” I extend the folio towards him.

“You don’t mind?”

“It’s kind of cute.” I looked up at him. “No, I don’t mind.”

After a moment he smiled and returned to his work.

A few weeks later, after a routine hunting trip, Vlad found me in the study.

The expression on his face was almost dour. “I have something I must tell you.”

I was startled into silence with his tone. “Is everything alright?” I asked, moving over to him and taking his hands.

He chuckled and broke into a grin. “Yes, vulturul meu.” He placed his hands on either side of my face and I marveled, as I always did, at how cold his hands were. “I love you.”

I froze stock-still, eyes shooting open.

Vlad watched with narrowed eyebrows, then dropped his gaze and his hands. He went to turn away and I realized what had happened.

“Wait,” I said before he could move away too quickly. He stopped halfway down the hall and turned back, his eyes hopeful.

“I love you too, I just… I never thought you’d say it.”

He returned to me in the blink of an eye, and I flinched back at the rush of air that followed. “I keep forgetting you can do that.”

Taking my face in his hands again, he pressed a soft kiss to my hairline. “Would you come help me get my armor on?”

“I’m surprised a vampire needs armor,” I said, grinning mischievously. “Lead the way.”

When Vlad opened the door to the armory room, I was surprised for only a moment that there were a collection of swords and various weapons hanging on the stone walls.

“Oh, look at your collection,” I said, turning slowly to look at everything.

“I think I’m going to take this one,” he said, pulling down a large, medieval-looking sword. Holding the sheath in one hand, he pulled the sword out by about six inches to reveal a sharp, shiny blade.

“Hold this.” He held it out and I braced myself as I held it by the belt, only to find that it was slightly lighter than I expected.

He slipped into the legs of the armor and then what would have been the top of a pair of pants.

“Now the part for which I requested your help,” he said, giving me a grin over his shoulder.

He held up the torso of the armor, and I held up a finger. I quickly strapped the sword around my own hips - for no other reason than I would probably never get to hold a sword like this ever again - and then took the armor piece from him. Once he’d slid into the top, he looked down and considered the sword.

“Sorry, I put it there so I could use both of my hands,” I explained, hands going to undo the buckle. Vlad took both of my hands and kissed my knuckles.

“It suits you,” he said. “I’ll teach you when I return.”

He strapped the sword on, then slid his hands into the gauntlets. I attached them to the rest of the armor, then picked up his helmet.

I followed him down to the main hall, and outside in the rain one of the stablehands held his mount’s reins in the air.

“A kiss for luck?” He asked, tucking the helmet under an arm.

“I’ll oblige,” I said, placing my hands on either side of his face and pulling him down so I could kiss him.

He gave me a starry-eyed look before sliding the helmet on and heading outside.

I watched until he was no more than a speck in the distance, then turned to head into the main hall for an evening meal.

Since Vlad’s departure an uneasy feeling had settled into my gut and refused to leave. I tried to carry on with normal procedure - working on developing my magic with Petyr and translating the alchemy books - but my attention was divided the whole time.

The unsettled feeling didn’t go away once I settled in to bed at the end of a week of Vlad being away and tried to focus on the latest book I was reading. I knew something was wrong - the feeling was tinged with the tingly sensation I got from my magic - but I couldn’t pinpoint what exactly was wrong.

My suspicions were confirmed when the door to my chambers was kicked open. The door slammed into the wall nearest the doorway, and several men entered my chambers. One started speaking in Romanian, and thanks to Peytr’s instruction I cast a spell that allowed me to understand them, and them me.

“ - you will tell us where the devil is.”

“I’m sorry?”

The man who’d been speaking narrowed his eyes at me. “The count, woman! Where is he?”

“I don’t know,” I said, sliding from the bed and folding my arms around myself. “In fact, I’d wager he had set out to find you.”

The man grit his teeth. Behind him the other men adjusted their grip on their weapons, and I felt a chill creep up my spine.

The man shook his head. “It doesn’t matter - we can’t harm him anyways. But you… you we can hurt.”

My hand was up between him and me before I knew what was happening, and his sword stroke bounced off of the defensive spell I’d cast. He fell away, and I continued to block other strikes as the other men rushed forward.

My arms were beginning to shake as I was pushed towards the center of the room, and a flash of movement near the doorway caught my eye. My defenses lapsed for only a second as I glimpsed Vlad in the doorway, and hope bloomed in the pit of my stomach.

And then I went cold. I looked up to see the triumphant face of one of the attackers, and looked down to see the blade of his sword sticking through my gut. There was a sucking noise as he pulled it free, and I heard a shout before I was falling once again.

I awoke with a start to the sound of steady beeping. I reached over to turn off what I thought was my alarm clock, only for somebody to chuckle at my weak gestures. “I’m afraid you can’t turn the ECG machine off, dear.”

“Oh.” That explained why everything was so blindingly white - I was in the hospital.

“But, since you’re awake, you’ve got a couple of visitors.”

She opened the door and Celia and Eliot dashed to my bedside.

“I’ll give you all a moment,” the nurse said, leaving the room and shutting the door behind her.

“Where did you go?” Eliot asked.

“Transylvania,” I told them, taking one of each of their hands. “And not just that, but you sent me back to the 1500s.”

“What?!” Celia asked.

“It wasn’t all bad. I got to meet Dracula.”

Both of their jaws dropped.

“And then I was stabbed in the stomach just before I got back here.”

“That’s what the nurse said,” Celia said. “They said you’re lucky that they were able to stitch up the wounds you got.”

“And my parents?”

Celia shook her head. “All of us were worried - you just vanished. And now you’re back -  hell, I think your mom’s kicking herself that she can’t do magic.”

“I get it, I get the same way when I feel like I don’t have a handle on a situation,” I said. “But really, I’m okay.”

“Says the woman with a gaping stab wound in the middle of her gut,” Eliot snarked.

I shook my head. “I can’t just leave things like this.”

“You’re not seriously thinking of traveling after a major injury. Besides the fact that the place you want to go is halfway around the world.”

“You don’t get it,” I said. “I have to go back.”

“Maybe we don’t,” Eliot said, “but we can’t just stand by if you might hurt yourself.”

“I was the one who was sent back, and in case you’ve forgotten he’s a vampire.” I shifted in the bed, feeling extremely exposed in the hospital gown. “I should go - alone.”

“Rhi, you have no idea how bad we feel for doing that to you,” Celia said, her voice pleading. “You’re right - we risked losing you once, and now that you’re back we don’t want to risk that again.”

“I just don’t want to burden you with going to Romania with me - ”

“Burden? Our fuckup made you disappear for four months, then when you did return you were in a coma for another month or so,” Eliot said. “Please. Just for our satisfaction.”

“I was in a coma?” I felt a chill roll down my spine.

“You were unconscious when you came back,” Celia said, covering my hand with hers. “We got you to the hospital as fast as we could.”

“Okay, fine,” I said, my voice barely a whisper. “I see why you were so concerned.”

Celia and Eliot relayed the plan back to our parents, and somehow got them to agree to the harebrained scheme. I suspect it was because we were using completely mundane methods of getting there, instead of trying to blast ourselves to the middle of Europe.

I started the journey purely anxious, but as we got closer and closer I only got more excited. Then, when we were making our way into Transylvania, I felt my heart leap at the sight of more of the countryside.

The feeling of the cobbles under my feet as we crossed the bridge was comforting.

“Uh, Rhi?” Celia asked, peering over the edge of the bridge, “was this chasm this big when you were last here?”

I nodded. “C’mon, I can’t wait any longer,” I said, hurrying to the door. When Eliot and Celia reached me, the three of us heard a scream from inside the castle.

“Are we sure we want to be going in here?” Eliot asked, looking at me.

“I’ll go in,” I said. “You guys stay here, and I’ll come get you if it’s worth going in.”

The whimpers and screams lead me down an unlit hallway, and I finally heard the man cry out once more before there was a thumping noise.

“If you are here to kill me, you have only moments before I destroy you where you stand.”

“Lux.”

As Vlad stood and turned around, the lights brightened and I stood stock-still.

“Rhiannon.”

In the blink of an eye he was in front of me, holding me close.

“Hello,” I murmured into his chest.

“Meu vulturul, you survived.”

“Apparently, I did.”

He held me at arms’ length, his hands on my shoulders. “How?”

“I was sent back to modern day when I got stabbed, then I woke up in the hospital with the stab wound closed up.”

“And you returned.”

“I felt terrible about leaving you like that. I had to end the story.”

He chuckled, leaning his forehead against mine.

“Oh! And I brought friends.”

“Are these the friends who found the grimoire?”

“The very same.”

We walked to the front door together, ((arms linked around one another)). Eliot was shifting from foot to foot and Celia was pacing back and forth.

“Rhi! Thank goodness, we almost thought you were - ” Her gaze travelled upward as she looked up at Vlad, jaw agape. “Hello." “Vlad, this is Eliot and Celia. Ceels, Eliot - Vlad.”

Neither one of my friends spoke for a moment, then Celia extended her hand. “Nice to meet you finally,” she said, firmly shaking his hand.

“Celia’s the one who found the grimoire,” I said, meeting Vlad’s gaze and raising my eyebrows. "So all of this trouble is her fault.”

“Well - I, uh - ”

Vlad took her hand gently. “Thank you. Without that blunder I might not have met Rhiannon.”

Celia flushed.

“And then this is Eliot,” I said, gesturing to her with my free hand, “the one who got me to see past my bullshit and allow them to come with me.”

Vlad fixed me with a look. “You were going to try to make the journey by yourself?”

I rolled my eyes and huffed. “I wanted to.”

He turned his gaze to Eliot. “Then I thank you for curbing her stupidity.”

“Hey!”

“Shall I show you around?”

So he did, and when we left the castle I found myself thankful that this was how it all ended - my adventure completed, and the people I cared about most chattering away happily.

“Rhi,” Celia said, beckoning. “C’mon, we’re going for a walk.”

And so the four of us set off on a new adventure.

[canaryatlaw]

okay. well today was fine. better than yesterday I guess, some mental stress over....things starting to dissipate a bit thankfully. alarm went off at 7 and I got up, got ready and was out the door all on time. I get down to the courthouse at like 8:40, perfect timing to meet up for the 9:00 call. and like, actual lawyers have the IDs that let them go around security but I still have to go through security so I was like oh well I should just go through early then and meet them there. So I did, and then I went up to the 22nd floor to wait for the lawyer. this is guy lawyer I was at the deposition with last week, I like him, he’s fun, definitely a bit intense but not in a bad way. Anyway, I’m waiting on the 22nd floor and it’s like 9:10 when one of the other lawyers I was shadowing last week came by and she was like “....is he not here yet????” and I was like welp....nope haha and she was like “if he’s not here in 5 minutes text me” so I say okay because she’s kind of indirectly in charge of me (at this point kinda everyone is??) but like, I don’t wanna be a snitch, and I don’t want this guy to think I sold him out and got him in trouble, so I let 9:15 go and I was like come on dude come on, let me get credit for not snitching lol but it was going on 9:30 and the other lawyer had disappeared down a hallway that she would have to pass by me again to leave and I was concerned that she would walk out and see me sitting there without him and clearly not having texted her and being like “wtf” so by 9:30 I did text her, and I’m not sure what she did, but he finally showed up at like 10 am. and like, from one perspective that sounds really lazy and irresponsible, but I also know that like, my dad does that shit all the time lol because he can, the judges will wait for him to get there because he has a great relationship with pretty much all of them, so I can’t really judge too harshly. We had a lot of cases up though, so we were running back and forth between courtrooms and drafting orders and getting them approved then running to another courtroom and on and on. the end got a bit interesting when we walked in on a case where the judge was asking this plaintiff like “are you represented by (our law firm)?” and she was like yes and the judge was like, PISSED about us apparently missing the call, so we go outside with this person and tried to figure out what was going on while still juggling like three other cases going on in that courtroom, but what we more or less found was that we have no record of this person ever being a client and it seemed like they were a bit mentally.....off. and basically she had stepped up on a case that wasn’t hers accidentally that was a case we were on but not with her. so that was an odd little mix up but we figured it out. Walked back to the office, and once I got there I spent a while locating some files I was asked to scan in for someone which was confusing because they were described as “Davidson, etc” and I shit you not, there were two different stacks of 3 or 4 folders that both had two entirely separate cases with “Davidson” in the name, so I had to do a bit of figuring out to see what was right there. I also ended up calling the help line for this weird oil spill project I got placed on, and I got like accidentally bumped to a survey before actually talking to somebody like twice and each time I had to call they had an exceedingly long message to even get to talk to someone, so I was getting annoyed, and we only have the conference call style phone since it’s a conference room, so like everybody is subjected to hearing the conversation. But I finally got through to them and then had to go find the letters that had been sent and read them off to them and then basically got told they were ineligible for more money but since we were lawyers we probably wanted to appeal that (I don’t actually think we are going to though) then when I got off the phone and emailed the guy who put me on this assignment he was like “okay but what about the business we represent that didn’t get a letter” and I had to be like “without a letter they wouldn’t tell me jack shit” (I didn’t say jack shit obviously) so I’m not sure how that’s going to pan out, but we’ll see. I was supposed to sit in on a deposition at 1 but it ended up getting cancelled, so at 1 I decided to walk over to the whole foods a few blocks away, and while walking there I was totally engrossed in my phone doing some stuff for the DCTV podcast website that I straight up walked right past it, and was like wow I’m literally being such a millennial hipster stereotype right now lol. But I got there, and outside there was a man (I don’t like categorizing people by they status that they might be homeless, but he was panhandling) and he was asking for money, but of course I don’t have any because my wallet just got stolen, but I told him I was gonna go inside and eat and I would bring him out something if he wanted, so he said yes and asked for anything barbecue, so I agreed and went inside. Did my salad first and ate that, then went back to the hot food display and got some of what looked to be the closest to barbecue, something salisbury like, but upon further reflection I think it might’ve been like, salisbury tofu?? so I hope that still tasted okay and edible and I didn’t just waste $14 on a thing full of tofu that tasted like trash. so lesson there to be more aware of these things I suppose lol. I went back to the office and pretty much had something stopping me from doing any of the things I was assigned to, mostly like I hadn’t heard back from the person I was doing it for and couldn’t move on until I heard from them. So I tried to look up the info about the health insurance regarding if they had any of my doctors in their network plan, but it refused to load on me so I got stuck doing nothing for a while. After a bit I got called downstairs to go over making the court schedule because that’s gonna be my responsibility from now on, so I went over it with the lawyer who had been doing it and typed it up, so that’s good to know. I didn’t really do all that much for the rest of the day because I just didn’t really have anything to do.  There was a bit of a celebration because one of the lawyers had just tried a parking lot slip and fall case that was apparently kinda iffy on causation (like it wasn’t totally clear that it was actually the business’ fault) and because of that the insurance company wouldn’t even make an offer to settle because (presumably) they thought it was crap, but this afternoon the jury returned a verdict for our client to the tune of $212K, which for a slip and fall case is a HELL of a lot of money, so everyone was very excited about that. Towards the end of the day one of the other new lawyers and I sorted through the folders (such exciting lawyer projects, I know) to separate them into piles for the lawyers morning court call. After that I headed home, normal trip back, I’ve kind of developed this habit of flopping down on my bed for a while after getting home from work and of course kitty wants all the love and attention after being alone all day, so she’s always climbing all over me. So I stayed like that for a bit before getting up and making some food, and then turning on an episode of Friday Night Lights. After I had watched that I decided I was going to take on one of the recipes I had been wanting to make and had had up in my browser for a few days, these were titled “fluffy golden oreo funfetti rice krispie treats” and are basically like, pure happiness in food form lol. of course I’m super obnoxious about how I make my rice krispie treats because I have Standards™ so I had to like, cut some of the jumbo marshmallows I had into quarters so they'd melt more evenly with the mini marshmallows, and then of course had them melt super slowly so the texture would be good. so yeah, that was a bit of a process, but I think it came out pretty well. by the time I finished with this it was like 9:24 pm and I didn’t want to watch a full episode of something before going to bed so I ended up watching like half an episode of a series of unfortunate events, which I think was the last episode of their current season. And after that I started getting ready for bed and am now here. And that was pretty much my day. It’s later than the other nights I’ve been getting to sleep this week so I’m not gonna delay my sleep any further and end this post here. Goodnight babes. Stay classy. 

[coin-river-blog]

Shaquille O’Neal has single-handedly put the down-and-out pizza franchise Papa John’s on a better road to success. He and Papa John’s execs announced a bevy of partnerships on Friday, including O’Neal taking a seat on its board.

Shaq’s moves show he’s as savvy a businessman as he is a champion NBA player. Few saw this coming, except execs at Papa John’s, whose stock has been under considerable pressure for years due to myriad factors.

We’ll see over the long run if Shaq can help it regain better financial footing, but in the meantime, it’s going to be fun to watch.

Join CCN for $9.99 per month and get an ad-free version of CCN including discounts for future events and services. Support our journalists today. Click here to sign up.

You know @SHAQ as a Hall of Famer, sports commentator and entrepreneur. Today, we're adding "Papa John's board member and investor in Atlanta stores" to his long list of pursuits. His business savvy and passion for our pizza make him a great fit.

— Papa John's Pizza (@PapaJohns) March 22, 2019

The Business Play

In what is akin to a three-point shot, Shaq first grabbed a seat on the pizza restaurant chain’s board. Second, his addition facilitated the pizza chain entering into a marketing agreement with the NBA champion. He will serve as the company’s brand ambassador.

Third, O’Neal will invest in nine Papa John’s restaurants in the Atlanta area.

Eating and Investing His Way to Success

Many are used to seeing O’Neal in the General Auto Insurance and Icy Hot commercials. Others are used to seeing him trade basketball jabs on TNT with Charles Barkley and Kenny Smith. Like silly kids sometimes, their jokes can leave you in tears, and them too.

It seems odd that the jester/NBA legend now holds a seat on a major corporation’s board, but think about this. When it comes to food, the 7’ 1’’ and roughly 325-pound O’Neal isn’t just devouring it. He’s investing in it.

O’Neal owns a Krispy Kreme Doughnuts franchise in Atlanta. Southerners know that when that light is on at the legendary doughnut shop, delicious hot treats are ready.

Then there’s Big Chicken, a fried chicken restaurant Shaq founded in Las Vegas. To be a little classier, the four-time NBA champion owns self-named Shaquille’s fine dining restaurant in Los Angeles.

There’s something the champ invests in that he can’t eat, but it’s close to his heart. He’s a minority owner of the Sacramento Kings NBA franchise.

Still Not Full!

O’Neal says he “fell in love with Papa John’s in 1989.” A few years after that, in 1992, O’Neal was drafted by the Orlando Magic. He stayed there until 2011.

Papa John’s will be one of the NBA legend’s first major board seats. He was drawn in not for the pizza, but from his understanding of the importance of corporate diversity.

We Bet You’re Thrilled

Chairman Jeff Smith said the company is naturally thrilled to partner with O’Neal.

Investors smelled more than freshly baked pizza on the news. They sent Papa John’s up four percent during pre-market trading. The stock closed up about six percent, which is even more impressive considering the Dow closed down 460 points.

Shaq made it clear that he approached the Papa John’s team about partnering in some manner. He was aware of the public relations debacles the firm had due to the company’s founder’s penchant for using the “n-word.”

John Schnatter used the derogatory word during a media training exercise. When asked how he would distance himself from racist groups, Schnatter reportedly complained that KFC founder Colonel Sanders got away with referring to African-Americans in a derogatory way all the time.

Schnatter quit soon after that.

O’Neal, who noted he was the first African-American to be appointed to the Papa John’s board, said:

I was worried about the 800 franchisees and how they were affected by the comment.

Disclaimer: The views expressed in the article are solely those of the author and do not represent those of, nor should they be attributed to, CCN.

[sobeardtastemaker-blog]

How to Create a Great Value Proposition

New Post has been published on http://www.elimarketing.org/how-to-create-a-great-value-proposition/

How to Create a Great Value Proposition

Your value proposition determines if people will bother reading about your product or close the page. If you get it right, sales can skyrocket. Get it wrong, and you’ll wonder why all that traffic isn’t converting into sales.

The less known your company is, the more you need to work on and perfect your value proposition. Does Pepsi or Coke need a value proposition? Probably not.

Does Little Guy Joe who just got into online marketing need a value proposition? He sure does if he wants to make sales.

So what is a value proposition anyway?

Not wanting to rely solely on my memory, I did some research, and this is what I found to be something of a consensus of what a value proposition should be:

It’s your promise of value to be delivered to the customer. And it’s the #1 reason your prospect should buy from YOU.

A great value proposition incorporates one or more of these qualities:

Explaining how your product is going to solve your customer’s problem, or how it’s going to improve your customer’s situation. (This is called relevancy)

States specific benefits your product delivers (This is quantified value)

Tells your customer why they should buy from you instead of your competition (This is unique differentiation)

But I think we need more clarification. In doing my research, I also found that a great value proposition…

Targets a specific market

Focuses on quality, cost or speed, or a combination of two of those

Clarifies what the company or product does not do

Your value proposition should be the first thing visitors see on your home page. Plus, you’ll want to place it on all entry points to your site as well.

People need to be able to read it and immediately understand it. Which is to say, corporate gibberish created by a committee of eggheads isn’t going to cut it.

For example, if I tell you that my value proposition is:

“Revenue-focused automated marketing and sales closing solutions unleashed through collaboration throughout the revenue cycle”

I’m guessing you’re going to be bewildered. Or you’re falling asleep. Or you’re confused as can be.

And there’s no need to be redundant. For example:

Online Billing and Invoicing Software

Invoice Dude is an online billing software specially designed for small and medium businesses. Thousands of businesses and individuals trust us for their invoicing!

This tries to appeal to too many people – small businesses, medium businesses and individuals.

There is no differentiation from other online billing and invoicing software.

In addition, it says ‘thousands of businesses,’ yet offers no proof. Stating an actual number such as 12,549 would be a great help, and it could be updated automatically or manually on a daily or weekly basis.

Plus, I don’t know about you, but this entire value proposition puts me to sleep.

And with a name like Invoice Dude, they could have done soooo much better.

What a value proposition is NOT

It’s not a catch phrase or a slogan.

“Coke, it’s the real thing” and “L’Oreal, because you’re worth it” are slogans, not value propositions.

It’s also not a positioning statement.

“America’s #1 bandage brand, heals the wound fast, heals the hurt faster” is a positioning statement.

These are better than nothing, but they’re not what we’re striving for.

Calling your product the ‘real thing’ doesn’t show one benefit or reason why we should buy it over the competition.

Because you’re worth it doesn’t tell us anything – it just sounds good. And expensive.

Being #1 doesn’t make me want to buy your product, either.

These are all examples of slogans, not value propositions:

Like sleeping on a cloud (Sealy)

Milk from contented cows (Carnation)

Save Money, Live Better (Wal-Mart)

I’m lovin’ it (McDonalds)

When you care enough to send the very best (Hallmark)

Just Do It (Nike)

Finger Lickin’ Good (KFC)

Have it your way (Burger King)

Melts in your mouth, not in your hands (M&M)

The happiest place on earth (Disney World)

The best a man can get (Gillette)

Betcha can’t eat just one (Lays)

Think outside the bun (Taco Bell)

“Koo Koo for Cocoa Puffs”

“Snap! Crackle! Pop!” (Rice Krispies)

“Are you a Cadbury’s fruit and nut case?”

“Keep Walking” (Johnny Walker Whiskey)

“Wii would like to play.”

“I’d rather die of thirst than drink from the cup of mediocrity.” (Stella Artois)

“We don’t charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.” (From a towing company)

“Yesterday’s meals on wheels” (From a septic tank)

“We repair what your husband fixed.” (From a plumber’s truck)

Value proposition components

A value proposition is usually longer than a slogan.

In fact, it can have a headline, a sub-headline, one short paragraph of text and possibly bullet points.

And it might even include a visual, such as a photo, graphics or hero shot.

There is no one correct way to build your value statement, nor is there only one possibility. This is something you’re going to have to think about for awhile.

You make notes, try things, think about it, tweak it, ask opinions and tweak it some more.

Headline: This is usually the big end benefit you’re offering your customers, stated in one clear, short sentence. You might mention the product, the customer or both. This is where you grab attention, because if you don’t, then you’ve already lost a fair share of your prospects.

Sub-headline: This is a specific explanation of what your product does, who the ideal customer is and why your product is useful.

One short paragraph: This can be instead of or in addition to a sub-headline, and serves the same purpose as the sub-headline above.

3 bullet points: These are the key benefits or features. Notice we said three, not unlimited. You may or may not need bullets, but if you do, keep them short and punchy.

Visual: Images always communicate faster and generally better than words. You might show the product, the happy customer or an image that reinforces your message.

How to write your value proposition

This takes time to get it just right. In the beginning, do the best you can, and then adjust it along the way.

There is no reason to delay starting or growing your business just because you don’t have the perfect value statement yet.

A good value statement is better than no value statement, and in time you can make it great.

Start out by answering these questions:

What’s your product or service?

What is the BIG end-benefit of using it?

Who is your ideal target customer?

What makes your offer unique?

How is your product different from anything else available?

NOTE: If you can’t answer why your product is unique or different, then you might want to work on the product itself. Selling a ‘me too’ product that is identical to what’s already being offered can be difficult UNLESS you already have a well-known brand.

Once you have your first draft of your value statement, ask yourself these questions:

Is it clear and easy to understand?

Does it communicate concrete benefit(s)?

Will a customer know exactly what result they will get from using your product?

Does it say how it’s different or better than the competition?

Does it avoid hype? (amazing, fantastic, best ever)

Does it avoid business jargon? (revenue generated resource allocation blah blah blah)

Can your ideal prospect read it and understand it in a few seconds?

If someone is shopping around, then they’re likely to check out 4 or 5 different options before deciding.

By having your value proposition at the top of your first page, you can easily stand apart from all competitors.

Research shows that visitors notice value propositions faster when they have more text.

Visitors were also able to describe more product advantages when there were more to read about in the value proposition.

And readers tend to prefer bullet points – they’re easier to understand and remember.

Examples of great value propositions

Uber:

Tap the app, get a ride 

Uber is the smartest way to get around. One tap and a car comes directly to you. Your driver knows exactly where to go. And payment is completely cashless.

Unbounce:

Build, Publish and A/B Test Landing Pages Without I.T.

The mobile responsive landing page builder for marketers. 

<button copy>Build a high-converting landing page now.

Build a page

Publish it

Test and optimize

Slack:

A messaging app for teams who put robots on Mars!!

NASA’s jet propulsion laboratory is one of tens of thousands of teams around the world using Slack to make their working lives simpler, more pleasant, and more productive.

Trello:

Trello is the free, flexible and visual way to organize anything with anyone.

Drop the lengthy email threads, out-of-date spreadsheets, no-loner-so-sticky notes, and clunky software for managing your prospects. Trello lets you see everything about your project in a single glance.

iPhone:

Why there’s nothing quite like iPhone

Every iPhone we’ve made – and we mean every single one – was built on the same belief. That a phone should be more than a collection of features. That above all, a phone should be absolutely simple, beautiful and magical to use.

Value proposition boosters

Sometimes it’s difficult to find ways to differentiate yourself from your competition, so you might try adding one or more of these to your offer:

Free shipping

Fast or next day shipping

Free trial

Free setup or installation

Free bonus

No long-term contracts or payments

A very clear money back guarantee

A better than money-back guarantee

A discounted price

Customization

One-on-one personal help

Remember, you don’t need to hit your value proposition out of the park on the first try. But you do need to build one and use it.

Tests show that having the right value proposition can have an immediate effect on your sales, sometimes even doubling or tripling conversions.

Of course, it’s going to depend on your product, your niche, your customers and even your competition.

And most of all, it will depend on how well you craft your value proposition.

One more thing – an added beauty of having a great value proposition is it clarifies in your own mind what it is that you are truly doing for your customers.

It actually makes your job easier, in that you are no longer trying to be a jack of all trades, or trying to make your product fit everyone.

The clarity your value proposition brings can also bring you peace of mind and a better ability to grow your business big, strong and fast.

[stoneevans]

How to Create a Great Value Proposition

New Post has been published on https://www.home-business.com/how-to-create-a-great-value-proposition/

How to Create a Great Value Proposition

Your value proposition determines if people will bother reading about your product or close the page. If you get it right, sales can skyrocket. Get it wrong, and you’ll wonder why all that traffic isn’t converting into sales.

The less known your company is, the more you need to work on and perfect your value proposition. Does Pepsi or Coke need a value proposition? Probably not.

Does Little Guy Joe who just got into online marketing need a value proposition? He sure does if he wants to make sales.

So what is a value proposition anyway?

Not wanting to rely solely on my memory, I did some research, and this is what I found to be something of a consensus of what a value proposition should be:

It’s your promise of value to be delivered to the customer. And it’s the #1 reason your prospect should buy from YOU.

A great value proposition incorporates one or more of these qualities:

Explaining how your product is going to solve your customer’s problem, or how it’s going to improve your customer’s situation. (This is called relevancy)

States specific benefits your product delivers (This is quantified value)

Tells your customer why they should buy from you instead of your competition (This is unique differentiation)

But I think we need more clarification. In doing my research, I also found that a great value proposition…

Targets a specific market

Focuses on quality, cost or speed, or a combination of two of those

Clarifies what the company or product does not do

Your value proposition should be the first thing visitors see on your home page. Plus, you’ll want to place it on all entry points to your site as well.

People need to be able to read it and immediately understand it. Which is to say, corporate gibberish created by a committee of eggheads isn’t going to cut it.

For example, if I tell you that my value proposition is:

“Revenue-focused automated marketing and sales closing solutions unleashed through collaboration throughout the revenue cycle”

I’m guessing you’re going to be bewildered. Or you’re falling asleep. Or you’re confused as can be.

And there’s no need to be redundant. For example:

Online Billing and Invoicing Software

Invoice Dude is an online billing software specially designed for small and medium businesses. Thousands of businesses and individuals trust us for their invoicing!

This tries to appeal to too many people – small businesses, medium businesses and individuals.

There is no differentiation from other online billing and invoicing software.

In addition, it says ‘thousands of businesses,’ yet offers no proof. Stating an actual number such as 12,549 would be a great help, and it could be updated automatically or manually on a daily or weekly basis.

Plus, I don’t know about you, but this entire value proposition puts me to sleep.

And with a name like Invoice Dude, they could have done soooo much better.

What a value proposition is NOT

It’s not a catch phrase or a slogan.

“Coke, it’s the real thing” and “L’Oreal, because you’re worth it” are slogans, not value propositions.

It’s also not a positioning statement.

“America’s #1 bandage brand, heals the wound fast, heals the hurt faster” is a positioning statement.

These are better than nothing, but they’re not what we’re striving for.

Calling your product the ‘real thing’ doesn’t show one benefit or reason why we should buy it over the competition.

Because you’re worth it doesn’t tell us anything – it just sounds good. And expensive.

Being #1 doesn’t make me want to buy your product, either.

These are all examples of slogans, not value propositions:

Like sleeping on a cloud (Sealy)

Milk from contented cows (Carnation)

Save Money, Live Better (Wal-Mart)

I’m lovin’ it (McDonalds)

When you care enough to send the very best (Hallmark)

Just Do It (Nike)

Finger Lickin’ Good (KFC)

Have it your way (Burger King)

Melts in your mouth, not in your hands (M&M)

The happiest place on earth (Disney World)

The best a man can get (Gillette)

Betcha can’t eat just one (Lays)

Think outside the bun (Taco Bell)

“Koo Koo for Cocoa Puffs”

“Snap! Crackle! Pop!” (Rice Krispies)

“Are you a Cadbury’s fruit and nut case?”

“Keep Walking” (Johnny Walker Whiskey)

“Wii would like to play.”

“I’d rather die of thirst than drink from the cup of mediocrity.” (Stella Artois)

“We don’t charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.” (From a towing company)

“Yesterday’s meals on wheels” (From a septic tank)

“We repair what your husband fixed.” (From a plumber’s truck)

Value proposition components

A value proposition is usually longer than a slogan.

In fact, it can have a headline, a sub-headline, one short paragraph of text and possibly bullet points.

And it might even include a visual, such as a photo, graphics or hero shot.

There is no one correct way to build your value statement, nor is there only one possibility. This is something you’re going to have to think about for awhile.

You make notes, try things, think about it, tweak it, ask opinions and tweak it some more.

Headline: This is usually the big end benefit you’re offering your customers, stated in one clear, short sentence. You might mention the product, the customer or both. This is where you grab attention, because if you don’t, then you’ve already lost a fair share of your prospects.

Sub-headline: This is a specific explanation of what your product does, who the ideal customer is and why your product is useful.

One short paragraph: This can be instead of or in addition to a sub-headline, and serves the same purpose as the sub-headline above.

3 bullet points: These are the key benefits or features. Notice we said three, not unlimited. You may or may not need bullets, but if you do, keep them short and punchy.

Visual: Images always communicate faster and generally better than words. You might show the product, the happy customer or an image that reinforces your message.

How to write your value proposition

This takes time to get it just right. In the beginning, do the best you can, and then adjust it along the way.

There is no reason to delay starting or growing your business just because you don’t have the perfect value statement yet.

A good value statement is better than no value statement, and in time you can make it great.

Start out by answering these questions:

What’s your product or service?

What is the BIG end-benefit of using it?

Who is your ideal target customer?

What makes your offer unique?

How is your product different from anything else available?

NOTE: If you can’t answer why your product is unique or different, then you might want to work on the product itself. Selling a ‘me too’ product that is identical to what’s already being offered can be difficult UNLESS you already have a well-known brand.

Once you have your first draft of your value statement, ask yourself these questions:

Is it clear and easy to understand?

Does it communicate concrete benefit(s)?

Will a customer know exactly what result they will get from using your product?

Does it say how it’s different or better than the competition?

Does it avoid hype? (amazing, fantastic, best ever)

Does it avoid business jargon? (revenue generated resource allocation blah blah blah)

Can your ideal prospect read it and understand it in a few seconds?

If someone is shopping around, then they’re likely to check out 4 or 5 different options before deciding.

By having your value proposition at the top of your first page, you can easily stand apart from all competitors.

Research shows that visitors notice value propositions faster when they have more text.

Visitors were also able to describe more product advantages when there were more to read about in the value proposition.

And readers tend to prefer bullet points – they’re easier to understand and remember.

Examples of great value propositions

Uber:

Tap the app, get a ride 

Uber is the smartest way to get around. One tap and a car comes directly to you. Your driver knows exactly where to go. And payment is completely cashless.

Unbounce:

Build, Publish and A/B Test Landing Pages Without I.T.

The mobile responsive landing page builder for marketers. 

<button copy>Build a high-converting landing page now.

Build a page

Publish it

Test and optimize

Slack:

A messaging app for teams who put robots on Mars!!

NASA’s jet propulsion laboratory is one of tens of thousands of teams around the world using Slack to make their working lives simpler, more pleasant, and more productive.

Trello:

Trello is the free, flexible and visual way to organize anything with anyone.

Drop the lengthy email threads, out-of-date spreadsheets, no-loner-so-sticky notes, and clunky software for managing your prospects. Trello lets you see everything about your project in a single glance.

iPhone:

Why there’s nothing quite like iPhone

Every iPhone we’ve made – and we mean every single one – was built on the same belief. That a phone should be more than a collection of features. That above all, a phone should be absolutely simple, beautiful and magical to use.

Value proposition boosters

Sometimes it’s difficult to find ways to differentiate yourself from your competition, so you might try adding one or more of these to your offer:

Free shipping

Fast or next day shipping

Free trial

Free setup or installation

Free bonus

No long-term contracts or payments

A very clear money back guarantee

A better than money-back guarantee

A discounted price

Customization

One-on-one personal help

Remember, you don’t need to hit your value proposition out of the park on the first try. But you do need to build one and use it.

Tests show that having the right value proposition can have an immediate effect on your sales, sometimes even doubling or tripling conversions.

Of course, it’s going to depend on your product, your niche, your customers and even your competition.

And most of all, it will depend on how well you craft your value proposition.

One more thing – an added beauty of having a great value proposition is it clarifies in your own mind what it is that you are truly doing for your customers.

It actually makes your job easier, in that you are no longer trying to be a jack of all trades, or trying to make your product fit everyone.

The clarity your value proposition brings can also bring you peace of mind and a better ability to grow your business big, strong and fast.

[spinelikericekrispy]

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hehe

[princess-in-the-kitchen]

Title Copycat Krispy Kreme Doughnuts Category Sweets, Recipes I Have Made Preparation Time 12 hours Cook Time 5 minutes Yield 12 doughnuts Ingredients For the Doughnuts: 2¼ teaspoons instant yeast ¾ cup (180 ml) warm water ⅓ cup (66 grams) granulated sugar ½ teaspoon salt ¼ cup (57 grams) unsalted butter, at room temperature 1 egg 1 egg yolk 1 teaspoon vanilla extract 2½ to 3 cups (340 to 425 grams) all-purpose flour 3 to 4 cups (552 to 736 grams) vegetable shortening, for frying For the Glaze: 2 cups (227 grams) powdered sugar ¼ cup (60 ml) water 1½ teaspoons vanilla extract Directions 1. Make the Doughnuts: Combine the yeast and water in the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with a dough hook. Let stand for 10 minutes. 2. Add the sugar, salt, butter, egg, egg yolk, vanilla extract and 2½ cups of the flour. Knead on low speed until a dough begins to form. If the dough is quite sticky, add more flour a tablespoon at a time until a soft, tacky dough forms. The dough should clear the sides of the bowl, but not the bottom. 3. Transfer the dough to a lightly oiled bowl, cover tightly with plastic wrap and place in a warm, draft-free spot for 2 hours. 4. Gently press to deflate the dough, wrap in plastic wrap and refrigerate for at least 8 hours, or overnight. 5. On a floured work surface, roll the dough out to a ½-inch thickness. Using a doughnut cutter (if you don't have one, use one larger and one smaller round cutters) dipped in flour, cut out the doughnuts and place on a parchment-lined baking sheet. (You can roll any leftover dough scraps into balls for more doughnut holes.) Cover with a clean dish towel and allow to rest for 1 hour. 6. Line a large rimmed baking sheet with a double layer of paper towels and place a wire cooling rack on top. 7. When ready to fry, heat the vegetable shortening in a large cast iron skillet (or other wide, heavy-bottomed skillet or pot) to a maintained temperature of 360 to 370 degrees. Gently lower the doughnuts into the oil, being careful not to overcrowd the pan (I cooked in three batches). Cook until golden brown, about 1 minute per side. Carefully remove the doughnuts from the oil and place on the cooling rack. Repeat until all of the doughnuts have been fried. 8. Make the Glaze: In a medium bowl, whisk together the powdered sugar, water and vanilla extract until smooth. Working one at a time, dip each doughnut into the glaze, flip to coat the other side, and return to the cooling rack. Allow the glaze to set for about 15 minutes, then serve. Note: My husband said that reheating leftover doughnuts for 8 seconds in the microwave is perfect! My comments URL with MyCookBook-----

[spinelikericekrispy]

as a midwestern sometimes you just Know its gonna rain soon. the info is airdropped into your brain

[spinelikericekrispy]

so moisturized rn

[spinelikericekrispy]

doctor about literally every symptom regarding the vagina: mmmh could be a bacterial infection. or a yeast infection. or not. have you tried exercising?

[spinelikericekrispy]

my boss asked me to come in an hour (well they called three hours ahead but i only came in an hour early) not realizing it meant i got a lunch break and its extremely sad how proud of that i am

[spinelikericekrispy]

i can’t believe im getting into hockey because i cant dodge the fanfics

[spinelikericekrispy]

having a panera sandwich in the car is a religious experience