#krixel answers

[krixel]

♫ + Kai Hiwatari ♫ + Tala Valkov

♫ + Trey

♫ + Bryan/Mariam??

♫ + Tala/Trey

♫ + Kai & Tala

Now gush!

Okay! Get ready for all the gushing. I'm sorry, this is going to be long. I am going to try and limit my Rise Against usage because I have a whole fic dedicated to these characters and Rise Against, but just know – Rise Against! (They’re still going to be on the list, let’s be honest.) And I will aim for roughly five songs a piece because I have no self-control (this is totally me showing self-control.)

Kai Hiwatari

Back 2 Good – Matchbox 20

Viva La Vida – Coldplay (look, I don’t even like Coldplay but this song is such a fit for GLU Kai)

My Demons – Starset

Sick Cycle Carousel – Lifehouse

You Know My Name – Chris Cornell

Honorable Mention: Loaded & Alone – Hinder (this doesn’t really fit GLU Kai but this song has been tied to him in my head for a decade, so it’s going on here as a general thing.)

Tala

I’m Still Here – Johnny Rzeznik

Unwell – Matchbox 20

For the Heart I Once Had – Nightwish

Monsters – Shinedown

Monarch – Rise Against

Trey

She Talks to Angels – The Black Crows (not actually that version linked)

Brick by Boring Brick – Paramore

Lost – Goo Goo Dolls

This is me Trying – Taylor Swift

Dear Daughter - Halestorm

Bryan/Mariam

Aahhh! Thank you so much for this one!

Dark Nights – Dorothy (This is it. If you listen to nothing else for these two, listen to this one.)

Beautiful Trauma – Pink

Love is Madness – 30 Seconds to Mars

Indestructible – Goo Goo Dolls

The Silence - Halestorm

Tala/Trey

Is putting Good Left Undone cheating? I feel like it’s cheating. Okay, I’m just going to run through the Rise Against ones and move on: Good Left Undone, House on Fire, Methadone, and Tragedy + Time.

Until the End – Quietdrive

Good to You – Marianas Trench

October & April – The Rasmus

Love Will Come to You - Poets of the Fall (You knew they had to show up somewhere)

Iris – Goo Goo Dolls (is this cliché? Yes. Do I care? Nope.)

Kai & Tala

Forfeit – Rise Against

Those Nights – Skillet

Brother - Kodaline

Can’t Help Me Now – Rob Thomas

Here’s to Us – Halestorm (Okay, this is more just a Blitz Boys song in general for me.)

[krixel]

What are your headcanons about runaan and ethari being reunited?

May I direct you to my fanfic Reaching for the Light? XD Seriously though, I know I didn’t actually go that in-depth with the recovery, long term of their reunion.

My headcanon is that it’s going to be an emotional ride. At first, I think almost everything else will be overshadowed by the relief of being together again, with both of them being - not clingy because that has the wrong connotations - but unwilling to really be apart for any length of time.

I think Runaan’s going to have a struggle ahead of him because of the trauma he experienced, but also because his entire worldview is going to have to shift if he wants to mend fences with people he loves, and Ethari is going to be essential in building that bridge. Ethari has the compassion and emotional intelligence to navigate that situation, but also the comfort and confidence to push back on Runaan when required.

Ethari is probably going to spend a lot of time worrying over Runaan, and unintentionally neglect himself and not address the effects things had on him, as well. And maybe not want to ‘bother’ Runaan with his own issues and misgivings because he views them as inconsequential in the scheme of what Runaan experienced.  It may take Runaan a minute, but he’ll see it, and stand for exactly zero of it.

But ultimately, I headcanon that they’re two people wildly in love with each other, and with a lot of experience as individuals and as a couple, so nothing will shake that foundation.

Also cuddles and kisses, and late-night moonberry surprise, and Runaan hanging out in Ethari’s workshop because he won’t be cleared for duty yet, but Ethari is perpetually behind because he’s the best craftsman that everyone wants commissions from. And most of the time Runaan behaves... but sometimes he can’t help distracting Ethari, because his husband is hot and Runaan has feelings about watching him work.

[krixel]

For the memorable scene, chapter two of Good Left Undone where Kai, Bryan and Ian team up to take down Garland's goons! The whole sense of urgency and action was so well written and the banter *chef's kiss*. Also it's so very visual, I could see the contrast of night and snow and blood. It really stuck out to me.

I can't wait for more because I know there'll be other fantastic moments that'll just stick in my mind whenever I think of this fic!

Aw, yay! This means so much, because that scene was a bitch and a half to write. Trying to write action that is believable, doesn't come across as clinical, and sticks to pacing is... not my strength, so I'm really thrilled that scene managed to come together for the reader. And I live and die on Blitz Boy banter. Trying to remind them to stop snarking because, yes they are in fact under attack and need to address that, was the hard part. XD

[krixel]

Any hurt/comfort fic ideas you’ve had?

*cracks fingers* Oh, do I. Hurt/Comfort is my writing wheelhouse, and almost always my go-to, whether I mean it to be or not. I’m assuming this is TDP specific since I just very recently dipped a toe back into my ancient love of Beyblade, but if I’m wrong, just let me know because I’ve got hurt/comfort ideas to go around for all my fandoms.

Disclaimer that I cannot promise all of these (though hopefully some) will get written, but here’s a list of a few ideas.

1) A relatively short fic - started as a prompt fill, though I now have a different idea, and I’m half done with it - where Runaan and co. are trying to herd a Banther away from the Silvergrove’s border, and Runaan plays the bait. He executes one of his fancy leaps and lands on a hidden hunter’s trap that does unfavorable things to the health and function of his leg. A certain craftsman gets called out to disassemble the trap and take care of his idiot husband.

2) A not so short fic that I’ve done little more than scribble ideas down for that would take place in the courting phase of a Ruthari relationship, and involves Runaan being gone on a mission, and Ethari getting abducted. Runaan gets back and um - to put it delicately - loses his absolute shit. He hunts down the people who took Ethari, and goes more than a little vengeful, and then is terrified that now that Ethari’s witnessed the reality of Runaan’s skill set, he’ll be afraid of him. Ethari assures him that is not the case. Thouroughly.

3) What would likely be a long fic, and thus I have the most hesitation about attempting because my follow-through is... lacking - but, an AU Ruthari. Basically, Ethari is a writer and has a few bad years in a bad relationship and finally flees his entire life to find some peace and start over. He ends up in a small remote town, and meets Runaan, a ‘retired’ special ops veteran turned self-defense instructor, and his daughter Rayla. Runaan has a complicated history. Ethari has a complicated history. Rayla thinks they’re both idiots, and they spend a lot of time being soft and helping each other heal. 

There’s a glimpse at a handful of things rattling around in my brain, at current. Will they ever be more than ideas? Maybe. Hopefully, but at the very least, they’re fun to poke at every once in a while.

[krixel]

🌝 - Who is one character you haven't yet written for that you would like to? 🌈 - What inspired you to write GLU?

⏰ Do you spend more time reading fic, writing fic, or do you do both equally?

Who is one character you haven't yet written for that you would like to?

This is kind of a cheat answer because I have written for him, he's just not in any of the posted chapters, and that's Brooklyn. He plays a very unique role in GLU and I'm excited to see how his character is received / how he'll affect things moving forward... etc.

For an actual character, I haven't written yet but will eventually be making an appearance, Boris. He's very much a behind-the-curtains character in GLU, but he'll make his appearance eventually, and I'm honestly not entirely sure when or how that's going to happen.

What inspired you to write GLU?

Oh, man. I don't know if I can pinpoint the exact thing, honestly. I've had the general idea of a Tala mafia-type kidnapping au since 2017, that just slotted in with the version of Tala I'd been writing for several years, and there are about a million different versions of that opening scene that showcase my spectacular failure at getting it right. It was always just for me though, so I hadn't spent much time really developing it, and it mainly focused on Trey and Tala, with Kai around the edges.

When I started writing fanfiction again, that idea popped back up to the forefront, and I tried to ignore it because I'm the worst at finishing things, and I knew GLU would be an undertaking, and Beyblade is very much a fandom where you have to be self-motivated (I'm sure you know what I mean) and I just didn't think I had that kind of project in me.

Then I was listening to Rise Against (Paper Wings) - as I do - and they've always had a connection to Tala in my head, and what ended up being the second scene in chapter one between Trey and Tala basically wrote itself, and I didn't hate it. The rest of chapter one just formed around it, and suddenly this story I'd struggled to write snapped together into something I was actually proud of, and here we are. GLU has turned into the fanfic of my heart, and now I just hope I can do it justice.

Do you spend more time reading fic, writing fic, or do you do both equally?

That, honestly, really depends. Right now, for example, I've spent way more time reading it, but for a very specific fandom. I've torn through so many Batfam fanfics in the last five months, it's insane. But I haven't hyperfixated on this level for a long time. Before, I'd occasionally scroll through AO3 for something in whatever fandom I was feeling at the time, but I'd usually go for one-shots or something short because I usually have the attention span of a sardine.

My writing habits are equally disastrous, and I tend to be someone who either sits down and churns out scenes or short stories relatively quickly, or I ignore writing as a whole for months at a time. So, it probably all equals out to somewhere about the same. I can rarely balance both at the same time. Either all my focus goes into writing or reading, and if I'm in a book-binging mood, I won't dip much into fanfics for that period. Basically, my brain is a temperamental toddler, and I just try to keep it as happy as possible when I can.

[krixel]

hi! do u know which blog made those 'six sentence sunday' and 'wip wednesday' graphics?

Yep! They’re from @ao3commentoftheday. They have something for each day of the week. They also post writing advice and fanfic / writing memes, and are  a great blog to follow.

[krixel]

♫ Runaan - ♫ Ethari - and ofc ♫ Ruthari pls!

Of course, Anon! Thank you for letting me gush about my favorite music for them. <3 Though I realized that most of my songs for them ultimately are just different versions of Ruthari, but here we go. Also, a disclaimer that yes, Poets of the Fall is my favorite band, but I stand by my liberal use of them on this list.

Runaan

Twisted by Design - Sum 41

Song #3 - Stone Sour

Love's Tragedy Asunder - Demons & Wizards

Nemo - Nightwish

Anchor - Skillet

Honorable Mention: Save Me - Skillet (This one is kind of obligatory because it was the whole inspiration for my fic Reaching for the Light.)

Ethari

The Man to Hold the Water - Rob Thomas

Find A Way - SafetySuit

Rebirth - Poets of the Fall

My Love Will Never Die - Ag ft. Claire Wyndham

All the Way / 4U - Poets of the Fall

Ruthari

Dancing on Broken Glass - Poets of the Fall

Indestructible - Goo Goo Dolls

War - Poets of the Fall

Fools - Lauren Aquilina

Sanctuary - Welshly Arms

[krixel]

Oh you're coming with this just at the right time: I have my exams tomorrow, I need something to relax. 🌹🌹🌹🌹 (Ps. thanks for this ^^)

Of course! I’m fighting to focus, so figured this would be fun to do while I bang my head against the wall and call it writing. Good luck w/ your exams! And since you sent 4 flowers, here are 4 (okay, technically 5, but it was necessary) sentences.

Ethari had warned him the bow needed repaired, but Runaan had just wanted out of the shop. Recently, the craftsman’s eyes were a little too perceptive, and Runaan couldn’t seem to stop staring. A staff deflected the blade swinging for his head and Runaan ducked behind Lain, discarding the broken bow and drawing his swords. His flare of gratitude dimmed beneath Lain’s smile. “Smooth,” he said.

[krixel]

Do you have any headcanons you're itching to write a fic about?

Hmm, good question. I had to think about it, and still don’t have a particularly great answer. I’ve found that most of my headcanons tend to revolve around character personalities and relationship dynamics, more than situational events - so, I have a whole lot of characters jabbering in my head and nothing to do with them.

As a writer, plot and worldbuilding have always been the bane of my existence, and so, I latch on to characters, suss out their little quirks and interests, and then twiddle my thumbs because I’m bad at the other stuff. So, while I am super interested in exploring the dynamic between Rayla and Runaan, my mind blanks when I try to figure out something to actually do with them.

But also, my headcanon version of Runaan and Ethari’s relationship is that Runaan is 100% the chaotic one. He’s almost always a disaster, while Ethari is the one with all of his shit together.

[krixel]

🌹

Fun fact! Every TDP snippet I posted the last two days has since been scrapped into outtakes, because I’m terrible. So, here’s a sentence that will probably stay. (If this was for a Beyblade snippet just send me another one with preferred fandom.)

Smoke and metal mingled with sweat, invading Runaan’s senses and short-circuiting the nerves between his brain and body.

[krixel]

3 & 7 :D

Okie dokie, let’s see.

3) Which of your fics was most different from what you usually write?

Breathe. It’s funny, because it’s absolutely one of my favorites, but I am not usually a fluff writer, at all. I’m an angsty, hurt/comfort sort of person, but for Breathe, the prompt was ‘it’s medicine, take it’ for Rayla to Runaan, and the scene where Rayla makes this absolutely horrid concoction that she thinks is medicine and gives it to Runaan, popped into my head, and he loves her, so obviously he chokes it down, and then Ethari sees the mess and is just lovingly exasperated. So, with that tone, the rest of the fic just sort of followed, and that was really my first foray into writing fluff.

7) What’s your favorite piece of description or narration?

Oof. There are two that come to mind, both from the 2nd chapter of Reaching for the Light.

Runaan tamped down on the insane urge to laugh at her question. Thoughts tumbled through his head like shards of glass, cutting fresh wounds with the jagged edges of his failure. Blinded by pride and buried pain, he’d forced death upon Rayla and called it salvation, offered revenge under the guise of redemption. The Silvergrove placed the weight of his mistakes on her shoulders and not even Ethari had spared her from judgment. His arrogance had laid waste to their family, and in trying to salvage an unfounded shame, he’d destroyed the foundation of their lives.

This one I really liked because it captured exactly what was going on with Runaan at that moment, and it came together effortlessly for me on the first try, which literally never happens. I wanted him to kind of be spiraling with the realization, but also Rayla is right there, so he’s trying to hold it together, but it’s all kind of hitting him, and I hope I captured that with this paragraph.

And:

The familiar brogue rolled over Runaan like a healing balm, soothing his shattered edges, filling in his missing pieces, and calling him home. A knot formed in his throat and he swallowed, horrified at the emotions pushing up his chest and towards his eyes, acutely aware of the gathered humans. His lips parted to speak his husband’s name, but he bit it back as something far more fragile attempted to escape.

Which, I think this is one you actually mentioned in your review, and it made me grin because I loved it too. I wanted this to sort of be the opposite of what had just happened with Rayla, because, with her, Runaan always has to be strong, and he’s still in the mindset, and then Ethari walks through the door and just, emotionally, knocks him flat. Like Breathe, the reunion scene is what originally made me write the whole fic, and so I spent a lot of time trying to get it just the way I wanted it, and I think it came relatively close to what was my head.

[krixel]

🌹

From the next chapter of Good Left Undone. Kai’s night is not improving.

Kai really should have expected the bodies. They were the only thing that could make his night worse. “They were followed?”

“Nah,” Bryan said, puffing out smoke and crystallized breath. “Some civilians wandered by and I was bored.”

[krixel]

1, 5, 9, 15

1) What fandom(s) did you join this year?

I guess the best answer is The Dragon Prince. I watched the series as it released, and enjoyed it, but for some reason, it didn’t invest me to the point of seeking out the fandom for it. Then, while stuck in quarantine, I rewatched it and it struck home. I think having more free time than I’ve had in ages also helped, but it kind of dragged me back into participating in fandom in general, and now I’m writing fanfiction again for it and others, which I would not have predicted.

5) What creative work are you most proud of (you own or someone else’s)?

Hmm, good question. I think for myself, there’s a few this year for my writing, which is funny because I’ve also probably struggled more with writing this year than any other, but there are a few pieces I can look at and actually see improvement.

I’ve got some stuff brewing in my original work, which has been on the back burner for a while, because I finally feel confident enough as a writer to try and tackle it. As for things actually posted, Dreaming Wide Awake is probably my favorite piece for TDP, because I just really enjoy the style my writing took in that one, and it came across pretty much how I envisioned wanting it to go, which almost never happens.

I don’t know if this counts because it technically didn’t get posted in 2020, but I’m pretty proud of my upcoming Beyblade fic. I think it has some of my best writing to date, in certain places, and I mainly set out to write it for myself, so it’s been more enjoyable.

9) Recommend something that you really enjoyed in 2020.

Ooh, yay! I love recommending things, and despite what a terrible year this was overall, I encountered some great media.

Book: Kings of the Wyld - this was 100% my escape novel and I’m about to start re-reading it once I finish the current book I’m reading. It was just such a joy and ticked pretty much all my favorite boxes.

Video Game: I’m going to be predictable, but the FFVII:Remake delivered for me, and I’m just a sucker for that world and characters, so it was nice to get a bit of a fresh take with old friends. Also, high-def Reno. I love that slimy bastard. I also sank an insane amount of hours into Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild and Stardew Valley.

Music: To the shock of absolutely no one, Poets of the Fall! They chose 12 of their past songs and re-recorded them in live acoustic sessions at the Alexander Theatre in Helsinki, Finland, and the result is gorgeous. I think they can be found in most streaming services under a collected album now, or all the live videos are on youtube.

15) What are you looking forward to coming out in 2021?

Hopefully the next season of The Dragon Prince. XD I’m so behind on everything, and 2020 was such a bonkers year, I don’t even know release dates for things anymore.

Um, I’m actually quite excited for the Shadow & Bones adaptation to release on Netflix in April. I’m curious how they combined the Grisha Trilogy/Six of Crows story lines.

I’m sure there are books coming out, but I can’t think of any of them, and I’m years behind on my TBR, so a bunch of series I have intentions of reading are releasing conclusions in the next year, but I still need to read the first books.

[krixel]

Is it bad that I found the Outtakes folder the most interesting, mainly because I like to see what doesn't make it into people's fics. What were the ideas they had but just couldn't put in. But if there's nothing there you can share, what about Moonlight Kissed?

Oh, I can definitely do outtakes. My writing process is not effective, so my outtakes folder usually rivals or is greater than the actual fic. I looked for Moonlight Kissed outtakes, but most of those were just - uh - bad writing. So, a couple tidbits about Moonlight Kissed, and then I’ll post an outtake from Reaching for the Light.

Moonlight Kissed was originally named Lotus because I tend to just name stuff as an obvious scene element when I’m first working on it. I renamed it to Moonlight Kissed after - I expect shock and surprise at this - a Poets of the Fall song that kind of captures the mood and feel I was going for in that story. It’s the first story I finished in the TDP fandom, and while I’m mostly okay with it, I can see all the rough bits where I struggled to find character voice, and it made things a bit choppy and more forced than I usually prefer.

As for an outtake, here is a different opening for what became Reaching for the Light. It’s a darker start than the version I eventually went with, and honestly, while I liked the tone it was setting - something that would have focused more on the trauma aspects of events - that was ultimately not what I wanted that story to be, and so I rewrote the start to fit that story I wanted to tell. Also, the pacing was jacked in the original version.

It was different, the cold against his skin. Hard and rough beneath his nails, his side, it pressed into him. Runaan’s eyes snapped open, and he curled the fingers of his right hand. The golden glow of firelight chased the shadows around him, glinting off the metal of chains and cuffs. He closed his eyes. A dream, albeit a realistic one. Damp stone and rust tickled at his nose, an improvement from the rotten smell of human magic that had imprisoned him. He wished his other dreams, the good ones, came to him with such clarity. To be able to close his eyes and feel the rough, calloused hands of his husband, or to press his face into the crook of a strong shoulder and smell the smoke and metal of Ethari’s work mixed with his earthy scent. Runaan’s chest ached with his need for it.

Hands touched him then, gripping his left shoulder and shaking him. Electric sparks fired through his dying nerves, and Runaan’s eyes snapped open. A figure knelt over him, close enough to make out their all too human features. He jerked upright and a spiderweb of pain radiated through his body. Weakness swept behind the wave of hurt, and he swayed. The hands on him tightened. Runaan swept out an arm, trying to knock whoever held him away but his arm did little more than twitch at his side. “Calm down,” a voice said, too close to him. “We’re trying to help.”

Help? Humans helped no one but themselves, and even then, rarely. He struggled to wrestle his body into submission, trying to slow his heart rate and focus on his surroundings. After the empty void of his prison all his senses were misfiring. The human’s voice was at once distant and booming. The hands on him burned against his frozen skin, and the grip held him too tightly as he threatened to shake apart. The flickering torches scorched his eyes as he struggled to make out something beyond shifting shadows. With every breath his head spun and the pain heightened. He was free of the coin, that much he understood. He wondered at the cost.

“Runaan, please,” someone said, a different voice, a familiar one that sent both hope and terror through his heart. He missed her. She shouldn’t be here. They couldn’t have her too.

[krixel]

3, 9, 18

3: Any guilty pleasures (books/fics)?

I don’t know that I really have any guilty pleasures. I’m a pretty ‘I love what I love’ kind of person, and anyone who has a problem with it can screw off. I mean, I still read YA - usually YA Fantasy - and a spectrum of romance novels, but I have no problem admitting it. Um, I will read every possible version of an enemies to lovers au in any fandom I follow, as well as any sort of mafia au because I just find them so appealing for the possibilities, and I enjoy self-indulgent angst far more than I probably should, but only if it ends with comfort. I want happy endings, and I don’t think making things ‘gritty and dark for realism’ adds extra value to a book or somehow makes it any better than something light and fluffy and fun - but that’s kind of off topic from this question.

9: If you could wish for a new book from any author, who would it be?

Oooh, this one is a toss-up right now. I would do some pretty sketchy stuff for Neil Gaiman’s Neverwhere sequel, or the final book in The Band trilogy, Outlaw Empire by Nicholas Eames. I’m more inclined to say Outlaw Empire just because I read Kings of the Wyld and Bloody Rose both this year and they ruined my life, and I just want Eames to finish what he started with that.

18: Are you a ‘neatly designed outline’ writer or a ‘fuck it i’ll figure it out as i go’ writer?

*cries in chaos* I’m 100% a ‘fuck it, I’ll figure it out as I go’ writer, and it bites me in the ass every time. I wish I was more of a planner, but my brain just isn’t wired like that and I have to be writing before it’ll start making connections to things I need, which also means a lot of backtracking and staring at words knowing things are wrong but not knowing exactly what those things are for a long while.

[krixel]

Reaching for the light was so good!! Do you have any wips?

Hey, anon! Aw, thank you so much! I’m really happy you enjoyed it. That means a lot to hear.

As for wips - kind of. I have one other story I started, actually before I started Reaching for the Light, with Runaan & Ethari that was going to be my version of them ‘getting together,’ but I haven’t revisited it yet. Otherwise, not really. I love this fandom, and certainly want to write more for it, but my brain is having a bit of a dumb dumb moment where ideas are concerned.

Is there anything you’d like to see me write? I can’t make any promises, because my writing is erratic, at best, but I’m not opposed to prompts. My askbox is always open.