#learned how to custom path tho so that a big step

[spicyraeman]

got lost in the sauce, my mans 4k now

[hardcasey]

Sweet Tooth

Won't Fade into the Background - Part 2

Pairing: Toast x F!Reader

Summary: You are an owner of a bakery on Coruscant and end up running into a certain clone with a penchant for baked goods. 

Word Count: 7k (I got carried away lmao)

Rating/Warnings: T, Mostly fluff again, though it gets a little PG-13 at the end. Nothing too crazy tho.

A/N: Who’s more of a background clone than everyone’s fave boy Toast? I decided to give him the classic bakery au meet-cute that he deserves. <3 Not proofread so let me know if there are any glaring errors!

“You sure you don’t need any help cleaning up?” Your employee, Vella, called from the front of the shop. 

You poked your head out through the little window that separated the kitchen from the rest of the store. “I’m good, Vel. Go enjoy your Friday night.” 

“Alright, night boss,” The Twi’lek woman gave you a mock salute and laughed when she saw you roll your eyes before turning and heading out the door into the busy Coruscant streets. 

You turned back to your current task, taking inventory. It was not the most glamorous job, in fact it was your least favorite part about owning your own business, but it had to be done. With a sigh, you started counting, quickly losing yourself in the monotony. 

You were the proud owner of a small bakery on Coruscant. It was not the most lucrative job by far, but it had always been your dream to bake for a living, and you were proud to have achieved that goal so quickly. It had taken a lot of hard work to get to where you were now, along with quite a bit of luck. You had been finishing up your last year in culinary school when you walked by a place for rent right in the heart of the city. It had been right around when the war started, and the owner wanted to sell off the space as quickly as possible. You had the sneaking suspicion that he may have been involved with the Separatists and was trying to jump ship and flee the planet. Honestly, you didn’t really care what his deal was, only that he was giving you the place for a steal. Seppie or not, you were thankful for him. There was no other way you would have been able to afford a place in this part of the city otherwise. 

You had dropped a considerable portion of your savings into the purchase and renovation of the bakery, and there were times that you were subsisting off of nothing but cheap instant noodles, but everything had worked out in the end. The prime location meant there was a lot of foot traffic and it didn’t take long before you were turning a profit. And the quality of your pastries and baked goods earned you a loyal customer base, and you had many regulars that stopped in for a cup of caf and a little treat on their way to work. 

Once you finished up taking inventory, you headed out to the front to start cleaning up, stacking the chairs up on the tables so you could start sweeping. You were saving up for a droid that would sweep the floors for you, but you were still a ways off from that so you had to do it the old fashioned way. 

It was then that you noticed there was someone looking in through the window, clearly ogling the display of pastries and cakes that was there. The light from the setting sun pouring through the window cast their face in shadow, so you couldn’t tell who it was. 

Might as well invite them in, you thought to yourself as you leaned the broom against the wall. After all, the bakery wasn’t technically closed yet, though you almost never had customers at this time. 

You swung the door open and were about to say something to the figure when you saw them jump, clearly not realizing you were there. 

“Oh, hey, I’m sorry for scaring you! I just wanted to let you know that the bakery is still open if you want anything.” You said gently, holding your hands up in a placating manner. 

Now that you were outside, you could see the figure more clearly. They were a human male, with tan skin and warm brown eyes. He was wearing a grey uniform and his short dark hair was partly obscured by a matching grey hat. He seemed very familiar to you, and you were about to ask if you knew him, before it hit you. Duh! He was a clone. You weren’t used to seeing clones in anything other than their distinctive white armor, so it took a moment for your brain to put two and two together. 

“Oh, uh, I was just looking, ma’am! I’m very sorry.” He said quickly, the same way that a kid who had just been caught with their hand in the cookie jar would. He looked so sheepish, as if he was about to bolt any second. You weren’t sure why he was so apologetic, he was just looking through the window. A bunch of people did that. 

“No need to apologize, everyone looks through the windows.” You said, flashing him what you hoped was a reassuring smile. 

“I, uh, just wasn’t sure if you were gonna run me out or something,” he told you, averting his eyes and rubbing the back of his neck. 

“Why would I do that?” 

“Not many businesses are open to clones, and I wasn’t sure. I’ve never seen any clones in your shop and I guess I just assumed.” 

Okay, that lowkey made your blood boil. Why would anyone discriminate against the clones? They were the ones putting their lives on the line to protect the Republic, for kriffs sake! You hadn’t interacted with many clones, but the ones you had run into were nothing but polite and respectful. 

“That’s terrible! We absolutely allow clones here! You know what, come inside. There are still some pastries leftover from today. I’ll put them in a box for you and you can bring them back to your, er, squad? Company? Your friends!” You finished breathlessly, a little embarrassed you knew so little about anything involving the military. 

“Are you sure? I-I don’t have any money to pay for them,” He said sadly, his eyes darting down to his shoes as if there was suddenly something fascinating about them. 

“Nonsense! They’ll be going bad soon anyway and will just end up in the trash. You’ll be doing me a favor, honestly.” Without allowing him to protest further, you grabbed his elbow and tugged him into your shop. In the back of your mind you registered how big his bicep felt, which surprised you. He looked fit, yes, but it wasn’t like he was some meathead. Maybe his uniform just did a good job of disguising how strong he was. You felt yourself blush once you realised the path your thoughts had veered down and quickly pushed them out of your mind. 

“It smells good in here,” he said to no one in particular as he dropped his harm and headed behind the counter to start filling a box with leftover pastries. 

You smiled at him, before you realised something. “Forgive my manners, but I didn’t catch your name.” 

“CT-1928, ma’am.” He replied, his back straightening ever so slightly as he did, as if the action was ingrained in him.

“Do you have a nickname? I know a lot of clones go by them instead of their number.” You said delicately. You didn’t want to offend him by asking, but it felt so strange, so dehumanizing, to call him by a number. 

“Oh, uh, my brothers call me Toast.” He said, once again sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. “It’s not the greatest nickname, but it’s the one that stuck.” 

“Haha, I think it’s cute. And don’t worry, my parents used to call me Possum when I was little, because I used to climb around and get into the trash. It was cute until they said it in front of my friends, then they started calling me that too.” 

He laughed at that, his shoulders relaxing, his posture not so stiff. “My brothers started calling me Toast because the first time they served toast in the cafeteria after I got my assignment, I ate so many pieces I made myself sick.” 

“Pfft. That’s amazing,” You laughed as you shuffled things around so you could fit one last croissant inside. You got the sense the clones didn’t often get to have sweets, so you were going to make sure Toast could bring as many back as possible. “So are you here on shore leave?” 

“I’m actually a member of the Coruscant Guard. So I’m here often. Well all the time. I walk by this place every time they send me off to run errands, which is often since I’m still the new guy.” 

“Oh, that’s cool. That means you work with senators, right? That must be… something.” You’d read stories on the holonet about some of the more notorious senators and you doubted they treated the clones particularly well. 

“I haven’t personally worked with any members of the senate, though a lot of my brothers have. Most of my day is spent staring at security cameras. So, pretty boring. Though I’m not complaining.” 

You tied up the package with a neat little bow before handing it to him, another bright smile flashing across your face. Something about his earnest, open demeanor was very endearing to you and you secretly hoped you’d get to see him again soon. If not anything else, you could at least learn a little more about the clones that dedicated their lives to protecting the Republic, since your knowledge on the subject was apparently so lacking. 

“Well it’s good to hear that you’re local. Hopefully you can stop by again the next time you’re running errands. And feel free to invite your brothers too!” 

“T-thank you, ma’am. That is very kind of you.” He said before taking the box of pastries in his hand, holding it almost reverently. He was trying to hide it but you could tell he was very excited to eat some sweets later. 

With one last nod he headed out of the store, the bell chiming lightly after him. You stood there, simply watching his receding form blend into the crowd, catching yourself smiling at the prospect of seeing him again. 

~~~

Toast hadn’t made it three steps into the barracks before his vode were descending upon him. Well not really him as much as the box full of sugary confections in his hands. 

“What ya got there?” Jek inquired, already tugging at the ribbon to investigate the box’s contents. 

Toast shoved his greedy hands out of the way and marched over to the counter where they kept the caf machine, which was in a perpetual state of disarray. The caf machine was old, probably older than any of them, and saw high traffic 24/7. Honestly, with the amount it leaked and sputtered, it was a miracle the machine was still functioning. Toast hoped it would at least until the war was over because when it went, Fox would be in the grave right next to it. 

“You know that bakery on the way back from the Jedi temple?” Toast inquired as he placed the box on the counter, starting to pick at the knot so he could open it without cutting the ribbon. It was a pretty striped pastel pink and he wanted to keep it. 

“The one with the little tooka-shaped cookies?” Rhys’ eyes went wide with excitement. 

“Yeah, the lady who worked there saw me looking inside and then gave me all the leftover pastries from the window.” 

“For free!?” Jek exclaimed as he shuffled back towards the box, “What did you get? Did you get an eclair? Please tell me you got an eclair.” Toast nodded and handed his brother one, who promptly dug in. 

“What’s this about eclairs?” Stone rounded the corner, instantly noticing the box and saddling up to him. “Did you get sweets?” 

Toast spent the next few minutes divvying up the various pastries between everyone. He chose something made up of many thin layers of dough, filled with chopped nuts and soaked in honey. Baklava, he thinks it was called, or maybe balaclava? He didn’t know the difference. But he didn’t care as he devoured it, savoring each bite like it was something precious. He glanced around and saw all his brothers were experiencing similar states of bliss, if their expressions were anything to go by. 

~~~

He didn’t have a chance to visit the bakery for the next two weeks, too busy running around dealing with mess after mess. One day, a prison riot. The next, bomb threats at the senate. Everyone in the guard was so exhausted and in desperate need of a break. So when Hound mentioned he was taking Grizzer for a walk, Toast decided to tag along so that he could get some fresh air. Well, fresh for Coruscant. 

At some point they’d run into Rhys and Thire, on the way back from patrol duty. Neither of them were in a rush to get back to HQ to receive new marching orders, so they ended up tagging along. 

Their little group wandered the streets, just walking with no direction in mind. Grizzer had his snout pressed close to the ground, desperate to sniff everything. Toast smiled at the massiff’s antics from behind his bucket, before glancing around and realizing they were just a block away from the bakery. 

“Hey, guys. Wanna stop at that bakery? It’s just over there.” Toast asked, pointing his finger at the little awning in front of the shop.

Thire looked at him as if he had two heads. “Why? Do you think we’ll get handouts again? Not that I’m complaining, free is free, but didn’t you get those because it was the end of the day and she was planning on throwing them out? It’s the middle of the day now…”

“Well, she said I could come back whenever. And that I could bring you guys too.” Toast felt his cheeks heat up for some reason, suddenly feeling embarrassed. What if she was just being polite, and he wasn’t really supposed to come back? What if he brought too many of his brothers and she thought he was taking advantage of her generosity? 

He was just about to suggest they should move on when Rhys piped up. “Well, what are we waiting for? C’mon.” He was already halfway to the bakery before anyone could respond. Rhys had a major sweet tooth and nothing motivated him more than some sweets. Hound and Grizzer were right on his heels, having missed out on the pastries last time. 

Toast caught up to them quickly, with Thire right behind them, though they all froze as soon as they made it up to the doors. There were people inside this, lounging around sipping drinks and chatting. Could they go in? Would people get mad? 

All his vode were waiting for him to do something, and his eyes searched frantically around the storefront as if he would find an answer there. And, surprisingly, he did. Sort of. Because hanging right in the window was a sign that read ‘CLONES WELCOME’. You had to have hung it after your interaction, there was no other explanation. Something about that made his heart race. 

All of a sudden, you appeared in the window, a friendly grin on your face as you pointed at the sign and waved for them all to come in. 

“You didn’t tell us she was pretty, vod,” Thire whispered as they shuffled their way inside. Toast could just feel the shit eating grin from under his brother’s bucket. He just gave a noncommittal grunt as a response, which only made Thire laugh. 

The group of them stood awkwardly in the threshold of the store, not really knowing what to do with themselves. A few patrons looked over to see what was going on, and Toast braced for some sort of outrage at clones invading their space, but after a few seconds they all turned back to whatever they were doing before. 

Toast stood there dumbly, just staring at you. He hadn’t really been able to take a good look at you the last time, too distracted by how strange the whole situation had been. But now he could see that Thire was right. You are pretty. Very pretty. 

If you noticed how tongue-tied he was, you didn’t show it. You just greeted them with another smile and oh Maker that smile. It was the kind of smile that lit up your whole face and Toast wanted to see it every day for the rest of his life.

“Hi! Is this your first time here?” You asked, cocking your head to one side. 

“He’s been here before.” Hound answered, shoving Toast to the front of the group. 

“Oh, are you the one from a few weeks ago? Toast?” 

You remembered his name! He was pretty sure he was about to melt into a puddle right then and there. It took a second to realize that he hadn't answered yet and he quickly sputtered out, “Y-yeah. That’s me.” 

“I’m glad you came back! And you brought your brothers,” You turned to address the rest of the clones and offered out a hand, “It’s nice to meet you all, what are your names.” 

Hound, always the people person and the one most used to interacting with the public, stepped forward and shook your hand. “I’m Hound. That’s Thire and Jek. It’s nice to meet you ma’am, I’ve heard you’re a great baker, though I wouldn’t know first-hand.” 

You cocked an eyebrow at Toast, “You didn’t share?” 

“He was out on patrol, I swear!” Toast stammered, holding his hands up in front of him. 

“Hmmm, I guess I’ll take your word for it. Though I think he should get to pick out what he wants first. It’s only fair.” 

“Really?!” Hound exclaimed. His enthusiasm seemed to rub off on Grizzer, the massiff sitting up on his back legs and wiggling excitedly before letting out a happy bark. “Down boy,” Hound ordered, placing a hand on Grizzer’s hand to calm him down. 

‘Awe, he’s just excited,” you giggled as you bent down to give him some pats of your own. “Can he eat treats? I have some by the door that I give to some of the other dogs.” You asked Hound as you straightened back up. 

“Yes, he loves treats. Would you mind if I took them to go? I don’t want him spoiling his dinner.” 

“Of course! Now pick out what you all want. And you can put a box together to take to your brothers.” 

You spent the next twenty minutes helping them pick out pastries, answering questions so they could pick out something for each of their brothers. After they had made their selections, you sat with them at one of the tables and chatted. Well, you mostly asked questions and they all talked over each other in their excitement. Still, you enjoyed the time with them, happy to provide a place for them to relax and unwind. Their jobs seemed incredibly stressful and by reading in between the lines of some of the things they told you, they seemed to be mistreated by a good portion of the senators, made to run menial errands or be the punching bags senators took their frustrations out on. You could especially see it in Toast, in the way he was so scared of offending you, how he would avert his eyes all the time and flinch if someone spoke too loudly. It honestly made you want to burn down the senate building. 

Everyone had finished eating when Thire looked down at his wrist and exclaimed, “Oh kriff, it’s been over an hour! Fox is gonna kill us.” 

Toast scoffed. “Correction: Fox is going to kill you and Rhys. Hound and I are off right now.” 

“Bring him an extra tiramisu to smooth things over.” You said, already wrapping one up and adding it to the rest of their haul. 

The group scrambled around, putting their buckets back on and grabbing the various pastry boxes you’d filled for them. Toast paused before turning to you. “Um, we don’t have any credits on us right now, but I can bring some tomorrow. The Guard has a small discretionary fund we can-”

You stopped him with a hand on his shoulder. “Don’t worry about it. It’s on the house.”

“A-are you sure? That was a lot of food…” Toast didn’t want her to lose money because of him. After all, he was the one that brought his brothers here. 

“It’s okay, seriously. I actually started a little program where customers can buy a coffee or a pastry or whatever for a clone. There’s actually a little bucket next to the register that I set up,” you turned and pointed at it so he could see. “It was actually my employee Vella’s idea. She came up with it the day after we first met, and it’s been pretty popular. There are a lot of people out there who are really thankful for what you guys do, you know.” 

Toast didn’t know what to say, but he felt like he wanted to cry at such a nice gesture. “That is… really kind of you. Thanks.” It didn’t feel like nearly enough, but they were the only words Toast could form at the moment. 

“Of course,” you said, giving his shoulder a little squeeze. “Now go catch up with your brothers, and let the rest of them know they’re always welcome to a free drink or pastry here.” 

Toast thanked you once again before heading outside to where his brothers were waiting, trying to convince himself that your hand hadn’t lingered on his arm for a beat too long. No, it was just wishful thinking. 

As he and his vode made their way back to the barracks, Rhys threw an arm around his neck and said, “Wow, Toast, your girlfriend is the best!” earning him snickers from the rest of the group. 

“She’s not my girlfriend!” Toast tried to protest. 

“But you want her to be~” Hound teased. And he was right, Toast wanted that more than anything in the galaxy right now. But he knew it was impossible. You were beautiful and kind and funny and perfect and he... was just a clone. 

“It’s not like it could ever happen anyway,” Toast sighed. 

Thire nudged him with his shoulder. “Psssh, we all saw how her hand lingered on you. She definitely likes you.” 

“Definitely,” Rhys echoed. 

Toast smiled under his bucket. It might be a pipe dream, but in that moment he allowed himself to indulge in the fantasy. 

~~~

In the following weeks, you fell into a sort of routine. Toast would stop by your bakery at least once a week, sometimes more depending on his free time. And you cherished every moment you got to spend with him. Sometimes he would bring fellow members of the guard along, and every visit ended with your stomach cramping from how much you’d laughed at their various antics. You were confused how such a chaotic bunch of individuals were able to come together as an effective police force… that is until you met Commander Fox. His talent for wrangling them deserved a medal in your opinion. 

As much as you enjoyed his brothers, you really looked forward to the times where you and Toast were alone together. He’d always come to you with some wild story of an eccentric prisoner or a crazy heist perpetrated in the lower levels. Honestly you hadn’t expected him to be such a gossip, but you were hardly complaining. 

In return for his stories you started teaching him how to bake. It started off with him just watching you work as he talked, sometimes asking questions about what you were doing or peaking over your shoulder to get a closer look. Eventually he became an assistant of sorts, spending his time grabbing ingredients for you and washing the dishes once you were done with them. 

Today was the day you were going to convince him to bake a loaf of bread with you. You were going to start him off with a simple loaf of white bread, one that didn’t require much kneading and didn’t have a long proving time. You had already pulled out all the ingredients, bowls, and utensils and were waiting patiently for him to arrive. 

By the time you heard the bell ring and saw him coming through the door, you were tapping your foot in anticipation. He wasn’t late - in fact he was right on time as always - but you were just itching to see him. 

“Toast! You’re here!” Ugh, that was the best greeting you could come up with? you cringed internally. Luckily, he didn’t seem to mind your banal greeting, a smile on his lips as he pulled his bucket over his head and placed it on a nearby shelf. You found yourself longing for a reality where he greeted you with a peck on the lips along with that sweet smile. Maker, you had it bad for him. 

His eyes flashed over to the ingredients on the counter. “What are you making today?”

“I’m not making anything today. But we are. I think it's time for you to try your hand at baking. And in honor of your love of toast, we’re starting off with bread.” 

He rolled his eyes at that, but the corner of his mouth still quirked up, showing off one of his dimples. “Isn’t bread kind of hard to make though? Maybe we should start out with something simpler…” 

“Where’s your courage, soldier?” you teased, poking a finger at his chest. He huffed and you laughed. “Now c’mon, wash your hands and get your apron on.” 

He ended up taking the top half of his armor off, in only his blacks from the waist up, his sleeve rolled up to his elbows. You were half thankful and half disappointed the apron covered the way his form fitting shirt stretched across his chest. At least you wouldn’t be distracted, but boy oh boy did you want a closer look. 

The two of you chatted about your days as you started working on each of your loaves. With so few ingredients the process went quick, and soon enough you were kneading the dough. 

“Now this is called the slap and fold technique. First get your dough together in a ball like this… and then you slap it down!” You demonstrated by taking your lump of wet dough and slapping it down on the table. “Then you just fold it in half and repeat. We need to do it for about five minutes.” 

“I think you mean we knead to do it for five minutes,” Toast said with a cheeky grin.

“Blegh. Terrible.” You flicked a bit of flour at him as punishment. “I think you knead to be locked up for that pun.” Toast just laughed and continued working, the smile on his face never dropping. 

Once you were ready, you shaped both of the loaves and put them in the oven. When you turned back to him you couldn’t help but giggle. He was absolutely covered in flour. 

“What? Do I have something on my face?” He asked, face suddenly becoming serious. 

You stepped close to him and brushed his face clean with your thumb. “On your face, in your hair, on your shirt. I think you managed to get flour everywhere except the apron.”

“Well you were the one throwing it at me!” came his retort as he used his hands to shake his hair out, turning it from  grey back to its lovely dark color. 

“Touché. Now let me help you get cleaned up. I think you got some on your back. Somehow.” You grabbed a washcloth and wet it under the sink and started using it to wipe the flour off his clothes.  

“It’s one of my many skills from cadet training.” He told you, eyes twinkling, as you dabbed at a spot you missed on his face. You could feel his lips moving as he spoke. Stop thinking about how soft they probably are, you chided yourself. 

“You’re just lucky you’re so charming.” 

That made him blush and avert his eyes, which would have been cute if you weren’t worried you’d gone a bit too far. You didn’t want to embarrass him or anything. You had thought the two of you were flirting, but maybe you read the situation wrong. You were notoriously bad in the romance department, something Vella had told you after the third time you had missed a customer trying to flirt with you. 

Toast cleared his throat before turning back to you. He noticed you’d stepped back away from him and sighed internally. That would have been the perfect time to kiss you or ask you out or something. Anything other than dancing around each other like you two were doing now. Despite the fact that his brothers believed you two were already together - no matter how much he protested - he still wasn’t sure if you felt the same as he did. He had his suspicions, but what if he was wrong? You were his only friend outside of his brothers and he didn’t want to do anything to mess that up or make it awkward. 

He thanked the Maker you didn’t tease him, just turning and starting to wash the dishes. He grabbed a bowl and joined you at the big industrial sink, dunking his hands in the warm sudsy mixture and used the sponge to start scrubbing at the stubborn bits of dough that refused to come off. The two of you worked in silence, though not an uncomfortable one, Toast was glad to find. Just as he was finishing drying the last bowl, he remembered something. 

“Oh, uh, I almost forgot. Do you know Senator Amidala?” 

“Not personally, but I’ve heard of her.”

“Well, she is throwing a banquet or something in a few days and the bakery that was supposed to handle the desserts fell through at the last minute. Thorn suggested you as a replacement and asked me to ask you if it was possible.” 

“Hmm. It depends on how long I’d have, and what kind of desserts she wants. Plus how many guests she’s having. I’m not saying no, but I’m not sure how realistic it is. It’s just me, Vella, and two others on staff.” You had started pacing, already running the logistics through your head.

“What if me and the rest of the guard helped you?” 

You paused your pacing to look at him. “That could work… but would you all even be able to take off work?”

“Well, it’s been pretty slow this week and we’re spending most of our time getting ready for the party…” You responded with a noncommittal hum so he pressed on. “How about I call Senator Amidala and Commander Fox on the coms and we can get everything worked out?”

“Yeah, sure. That’d be great.” 

For the next twenty minutes you hashed out the details with Senator Amidala - Padmé, she insisted you call her - and Commander Fox. Eventually you settled on an order of one large, four-tiered cake and a hundred little fruit tarts. Fox had been hesitant to lend out his troopers until Padmé had offered to replace the old coffee machine in the guard’s office. The party was in three days, so it would be a tight deadline, but you were sure you could do it. Especially with the guard’s help. There was also the motivating factor of the hefty payment Padmé was offering. It would be enough for you to buy an army of cleaning robots!

As soon as you hung up you were already placing an order of the ingredients and messaging your employees to tell them about the job. You were so focused on your task that you jumped with the oven’s timer dinged. Toast stifled a chuckle behind his hand and you shot him a look as you pulled both loaves of bread out of the oven. Both loaves were a perfect golden brown and looked absolutely delicious. 

Toast hovered over your shoulder as you placed the bread on the cooling rack, and you had to slap his hand away a few times as you waited for them to cool. Once you could hold them safely in your hands, you handed Toast his loaf and took yours in your hands. “C’mon, let’s take a picture together with our bread.” You tucked yourself into his side and held your loaf up as he snapped the picture. 

Once you were satisfied with the picture you relented to his puppy-dog eyes and cut into the bread. You both slathered a piece in butter and tapped them together as if they were wine glasses before taking a bite. 

“Mmmmmhhh,” you both groaned in unison at the first bite of warm bread. There was nothing better. 

“This is so good.” You mumbled in between bites. 

“So much better than anything in the caf.” Toast agreed, his eyes half-closed in bliss. Before you missed it, you snapped a picture. Toast with his toast. It was perfect. 

~~~

You stared at the sight of the twenty clone troopers in front of you, decked out in aprons and hair nets, standing at parade rest in a line as Commander Fox, also in an apron, paced back and forth, hands behind his back, as he gave them their orders. 

“Now I want you all on your best behavior. It may seem like you’re on a break, but I want you to treat this as if you’re still on the clock,” He stopped pacing and turned to his men, “Do I make myself clear?” 

“Yes, sir!” They all responded with a salute. 

You took that moment to snap a picture of them all, Fox’s head snapping towards you at the click of the camera. “I want to remember this,” you told him, fighting back a smile. 

You turned to Padmé, who had insisted on coming to help out herself, bringing along her two droids and a Jedi to offer some extra hands. She came complete with a chic outfit for the occasion and you envied how good she looked at six in the morning. You showed her the picture and she asked, “Can you send that to me?” Fox huffed loudly and the two of you broke out into a fit of giggles. 

Once you got a hold of yourself you started listing out tasks that needed to be done to Fox. “We’ll need people to clean and cut the fruit for the tarts. Another group can help with mixing and cutting the crust. For the cake, we’ll also need one group handling the batter, and another the frosting and decorations. And we can rotate who is on dish duty.” 

Fox immediately started delegating out tasks to his troops and you assigned a member of your staff to help each group. Everyone quickly scrambled to start working on their tasks, the troopers clearly very excited to help. 

Throughout the day you flitted from group to group, demonstrating how to do things when needed. Your employees were handling everything so well and you made a reminder to yourself to give them a nice bonus after this. You stepped away from where Vella was showing the boys how to make flowers out of frosting and found Toast lecturing his brothers about the right way to measure flour. 

“You can’t just scoop it out straight from the bag, you’ll use too much that way. You have to sift it in like this,” He started demonstrating the proper technique for them, and you noticed he had somehow managed to get flour all over himself again. 

“Good job, Toast,” You said as you passed him, brushing the flour out of his hair as you went. “Keep up the great work, boys!” You gave them a thumbs up and moved onto the next group, dodging the R2 unit as it made a beeline to the fridge, a tray of freshly cut fruit balanced on its head. 

The next two days passed by smoother than you could have hoped. There were only a few minor incidents. Hound tripping over R2 and spilling some batter, Thorn having to scold Jek and Rhys for eating half of their frosting. Nothing you couldn't handle. Commander Fox had everyone working like a well oiled machine, making sure everything stayed on time. Throughout both days, Padmé’s protocol droid busied himself with taking pictures of the event, and Padmé promised to send them all to you after the party.

It got down to the wire, but you managed to put the last slice of jogan fruit on the hundredth tart with forty-five minutes to spare. Your employees handled loading everything up into the speeder to take them to the venue. You watched them out of the corner of your eye to make sure things went smoothly. Padmé came up to you and thanked you profusely for rushing such a huge order and promised to promote your business to all her friends before she and the rest of her entourage hopped into the speeder with your employees and took off for the party. 

You turned back to the clone troopers, who had already finished washing up most of the kitchen. “Don’t worry about the rest, guys, I’ve got it. You should probably start heading back and start getting ready.” 

“Trying to kick us out so soon?” Fox mused. 

You laughed. “Actually, before you go, I have a little surprise for you all. As a way to say thank you and as a pick me up before the party. I know those things can be tiring.” You went and retrieved the gift you had stayed up all last night working on, keeping it behind your back until you were right in front of them. 

You held out a plate of cookies shaped like their helmets, each one customized to look like the helmet of each of the troopers there. You had recruited C3-PO to take reference pictures of all of their helmets while they were working, and the droid had really pulled through for you, even managing to get detail shots for you. 

“Woah, are these our helmets?” Stone asked as you handed him his cookie. 

“Look, it’s me.” Thorn said to Fox as he waggled his cookie in front of his brother’s face. Fox rolled his eyes but even he couldn’t fight his smile away. 

You beamed as each of the troopers examined their cookies and thanked you for them. They all groaned as you forced them to get together for one last picture and the shutter had barely flashed before they were scarfing down the cookies. 

Once they were done, Fox and Thorn started hoarding the group through the door. Before Toast could follow his brothers, Fox turned to him, “You stay here and help out with the rest of the clean up.” 

Toast blinked for a moment before he responded with a “Yes, sir.” 

He waited until he was sure the last of his vode were out the door before he turned to you. He planned on saying something funny or romantic, but all his words failed him as you launched yourself at him and pulled him into a big hug. “Thanks for all your help. I couldn’t have done this without you.” You told him, your voice muffled from your spot pressed against his chest. He returned the hug and rested his cheek against the top of your head. 

You couldn’t be sure if it was him who tilted his head down or you who tilted your head up, but you soon found yourselves nose to nose. Maybe sleep deprivation lowered your inhibitions, because you soon found yourself raising up on your tiptoes and pressing your lips to his. His arms tightened around you as he returned the kiss, letting out a groan as you both melted into each other. It started off sweet and gentle, but quickly developed into something more heated as you swept your tongue across the seam of his lips. He let out another tortured whine as he opened his mouth up to you, pulling you flush against him with one hand falling down to grab your ass while the other hitched your leg over his hip. 

Eventually you needed to come up for air and reluctantly parted from him, a blush rising to your cheeks as the string of saliva that connected you broke and dribbled down your chin. He wiped it away with his thumb before bringing his forehead to rest against yours. The two of you stayed like that for a while, gazing into each other's eyes as you caught your breath. 

You brought up one of your hands to brush a bit of flour out of his eyebrow. “You managed to get flour on you somehow. I don’t think we even used flour today.” 

He grinned at you. “It’s one of my many charms.” 

You giggled and pulled him back in for another kiss. Your lips had just met when you heard a camera shutter go off and you both whipped your heads around to the source of the noise. 

Vella stood in the doorway to the kitchen, camera raised and a shit-eating grin on her face. “Haha, I knew it! Thire owes me ten credits!” 

Both of you blinked at each other for a moment before joining in with her laughter.

[calebduval]

have you seen caleb duval? cal is in his junior year. the computer science major is twenty-two years old, & is an aries. people say he is debonair, resolute, abrasive, and haughty. rumours say they’re a member of calloway. i heard from the gossip blog that he sells drugs off campus to pay his tuition fees as his father is in major debt.

ALOHA !!! it’s chrissie again, coming ‘atcha with this piece of work. he’s kind of an old muse of mine and although he’s actually trash, i love him with all my heart. he’s the worst but he acts like he’s the best and he’s a very direct, aloof, deadpan snarker. anyway, i’ll spare you all from reading my babbling and cut to the action !! as always, feel free to give that wee grey heart a slap so i can come bombard you for plots and all that good stuff !!

FUNDAMENTALS.

full name. caleb joshua duval.

nickname. cal.

current age. twenty-two.

gender. cisgender male.

pronouns. he / his.

nationality. american.

sexual orientation. bisexual.

romantic orientation. demiromantic.

hometown. manhattan, new york.

major. computer science.

affiliation. calloway society.

parents. grace & benjamin duval.

siblings. oliver salvatore.

DETAILS.

positive traits. adept, charming, & determined.

negative traits. blunt, obstinate, & volatile.

height. six foot, three inches.

eye colour. hazel.

hair colour. brown.

zodiac. aries.

mbti. infj-t.

alignment. chaotic good.

temperament. phlegmatic.

intelligence type. linguistic.

spoken languages. english, & french.

HISTORY.

the duval family : manhattan born, business savvy, filthy filthy rich. at least, they used to be drowning in wealth until caleb’s father got involved in some rather sketchy business deals with some shady folk. while his family remains renowned for their riches and pristine reputation ( all covered up by caleb’s dirty rich grandfather, of course ) underneath the facade lies desolation and despair, slowly but surely nosediving toward bankruptcy. a fact that caleb keeps under wraps and one he’s prepared to take to the grave, should he make it six feet under before their financial situation makes headline news.

let’s bring it back to caleb’s childhood, shall we ? similar to every child, caleb started out a blank slate ; a young boy with wide eyes and an insistent hunger to learn. from a budding age, he was taught to be moral and just, to play by the rules and to keep his friends close but his enemies closer. that he should trust absolutely no body but himself. he’d wander around his lavish family home, abiding by every rule imposed by his father, carrying out any task his mother asked of him. he’d spend hours reading books, learning languages, playing various instruments. though his brother was three years his elder, the two boys were close. his parents, however, were chalk and cheese. his father was a stoic, irate man who craved power and held a prominent role within the business world and within their community. he was the chalk. caleb’s mother was the cheese ; a gentle, compassionate woman who adored her sons and remained wholeheartedly devoted to her husband regardless of the trouble he’d gotten them involved in.

while his mother loved him, caleb was by no means showered with affection and when he committed even a crime as small as accidentally breaking an expensive vase, he was punished by the hands of his father. his mother, of course, had no say in the matter. due to his upbringing, a fraction of caleb’s heart was never as soft as expected from a child. he was neither the chalk or the cheese. he was the by-product of both ends of the spectrum. the older he grew, the tougher his heart became and he was eventually able to differentiate his head from his heart ; often siding with his brain over his emotions.

caleb was eleven years old when he’d uncovered his fathers infidelity. he’d actually witnessed his father with his secretary outside one of the many hotels the duval family owned. that night, caleb had laid in his bed with a whirlwind of thoughts orbiting his brain yet no emotions to match. fast forward two years and on his thirteenth birthday following a blazing row that ruined the party, his parents finally filed for divorce. that same year, caleb’s mother fell off the wagon, leaving her two sons with their father and new step-mother. another two years later and his father informed caleb that his mother was ill. by the end of that year, caleb paid his last visit to the cancer ward. he can still recall how the doctor sat him down one evening, a solemn expression carved upon his face as he explained that his mother had passed only an hour before his visit. at this time, caleb’s brother had left home to go to college, leaving caleb alone with their father. eventually, their father’s new wife had left him for a younger man, which was no surprise to caleb. and ultimately, he remained alone to bear the brunt of his father’s anger.

already caleb was becoming a lonely boy. spending the majority of his time avoiding his father, he practically lived at school or fled to the local library. somewhere along the years of life minus his mother, between the years of cruelty hurled at him from his father, the teenager’s heart grew colder. by this stage, caleb was eighteen and a switch had flipped somewhere deep inside the far recesses of his mind. becoming an entirely altered version of his former self, his father sent him off to vermont, enrolling caleb in his old university, yates. joining the calloway society and majoring in computer science, caleb found his feet in no time. however, his moral compass was rather questionable. turning to drugs and partying whilst juggling his studies. it was during this time that his father warned that he was unable to continue with his tuition payments, leaving caleb with the worries of how he would continue attending yates ; a place where he finally felt he belonged. it was then that caleb realised that he had a decision to make. a decision that subsequently led him down the path of dealing drugs on the side though so far, he’s managed to keep this particular ‘ extracurricular ’ under lock and key.

admittedly, this was not the future caleb had dreamt of when he was an eager seven-year-old boy with big ideas and an unquenchable thirst for knowledge. once upon a time, caleb wore his words like one would wear their tattoos ; big and begging for the attention he was starved of. yet now, he remains silent and unfeeling, his temperament could snap as quick as a revolver inside a gun. his once wistful tone has become biting. his sadness and anger muddled together. these feelings are everything caleb now knows. that and how to keep a secret.

CONNECTIONS.

give me all of the connections from friends, frenemies, enemies, hookups, rivals and everything else in between. added bonus if there’s angst or drama. if you have anything in mind feel free to throw it at me, i’m open to the majority of things and have zero triggers so come at me bro !! some i’d love to explore tho are :

fellow calloway pals or rivals / close buddies / drug dealer pals / customers / enemies / rivals / exes / flings / hookups / friends with benefits.

[munsooon]

aka damn bitch im tired

when i got this request i screamed bcs i felt this on a spiritual level. also i kinda deviated from the request a bit so im sryy!! hope you enjoy it tho :)

Usually you worked the morning shifts, not that you minded. the crowd was nice enough and it never got as hectic as it tended to get on the afternoons, and it was a nice balance between your life here at earth and the life you had with The Doctor.

He never understood why you’d kept your job, it was tiring and you’d always come to him complaining about the ridiculous rude people you had to serve.

But alas, you were independent, and you liked being able to provide for yourself (even though current earth currency didn’t mean shit in outer space). So he learned to work around your schedule.

However, this time you were late.

He usually parked(?) the TARDIS in the spare room in your apartment around the time you usually got home- which was always at exactly 4:35. it was 5:00, and there was no sign of you. You always called if you were to be late, usually something about the metro not working or taking a different course due to traffic.

He was starting to worry.

Did you break your phone? Did your bus get hijacked? Did a customer finally push you over the edge and you rko’d them and now you’re in jail?

He didn’t know where to start looking, the city was so BIG! you could be anywhere!

With a long sigh, and a rub to his temple, he stepped back into the TARDIS and made his way to ground zero, your job. didn’t take him long to arrive, and when he did he carefully made his way inside.

Today seemed to be busier than usual. He looked through the windows to see if he could catch a sight of you, and it didn’t take him long to find you.

you were attending a table, smile bright and big, eyes dead and empty. You always told him you were a fake bitch but he never knew what you meant, until now. Your hair was a little disheveled, and your apron was slightly crooked. You looked absolutely exhausted, and he couldn’t help but feel a little guilty. He knows your work schedule like the back of his hand, yet when you’re out on an adventure he’ll push your limits. He doesn’t mean any harm of course, he simply wants you to see and enjoy everything the universe has to offer, but you’re only human, and with this job combined with your space journeys, you’re bound to burn out. and burned out is exactly what you looked like.

whatever plans he had for you this afternoon would have to wait, he needed to put your health first.

despite that he decided to go inside, and was quickly greeted by the hostess. “Hello! dine in for one?” she chirped. she shared the same look of death in her eyes as you did, so he just smiled widely and nodded. “Yes! i was wondering if i could sit by a booth?” he asked, he knew you always got the booths as your section. “of course sir! follow me please!”

he was quickly sat on a booth by the corner, and promptly waited for your arrival.

it took you less than 45 seconds to come and greet him, eyes glued to your notepad. “Hello! what can i get you to drink?” you asked in what could only be described as your customer service voice.

“just a water for now,” he said and immediately you looked up at him with wide eyes. “oh god, what are you doing here?” you asked him before looking around and making sure none of your managers were around so you could take a seat.

“well, i didn’t get a call so i got a bit worried,” he said, exaggerating a bit.

“oh i’m sorry, i didn’t have time to get my phone and call. we got slammed and one of the girls had to take her kid to the doctor so she wasn’t able to come in,” you explained with a small frown. “i don’t know if they’ll keep me until closing or until it dies down, sorry.”

“nah don’t worry about it,” he said, holding back the urge to tuck your loose stands of hair behind your ear, “i didn’t have anything extraordinary planned out,”

that was a lie.

“and you, deserve nothing but extraordinary.”

that wasn’t a lie.

you gave him a smile, but not like the ones you gave your tables; with your eyes blank and soulless- no, for him your eyes shone with what can only be described as adoration.

before you could tell him anymore, you could hear your name being called from the kitchen, indicating that your food was ready.

you gave him a small smile as you stood from the chair, “were you gonna stay?” you asked hopeful. with him there your shift would certainly be a little more interesting.

“no, i’d be a distraction, and you missy,” he said, finally reaching to tuck your messy stands behind your ear, “need to focus. i’ll come by later to pick you up okay? if you get out a little early i’m only a call away.”

your name was called again, and you nodded at him before running to the back to fetch your food.

after he left, he couldn’t help but to think about how exhausted you were going to be afterwards. you needed a break, from work and from you me adventures. but he didn’t know how to help you accomplish that. well at least now he’d have time to think.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

it wasn’t until very late that night that the Doctor got your call indicating that you were out.

“i know it’s late sorry, but i called just to let you know i was on my way to my apartment,” your tired voice said, barely above a whisper. “don’t move a muscle, i’m going to pick you up!” he said quickly, knowing your only mode of transportation was either him or your own legs- and it was dark and dangerous.

not even two seconds later the TARDIS materialized in front of you and the door soon opened. you stepped foot inside and was surprised at the sight.

along the rails were lit candles leading into the hallway, and although you were dead tired you couldn’t help but feel a rush of excitement as you put your bag down and followed the path.

it lead you a way you weren’t too familiar with, but it didnt take you long to reach your destination.

the door was old, made out of wood and was a little heavy to open, but once inside you couldn’t help but squeal. there was a little table, with two chairs at its side, with a bouquet of some alien flowers and what looked like food on a plate.

you wanted to cry!

“i thought you were in need a break, and decided to pick up your favorite,” a voice quipped up behind you, and you turned and ran into the Doctors arms. it wasnt anything big, but in that moment all you wanted to do was kiss him.

and kiss him you did. UwU  

[guardianofmemes]

fallout 4 companions best to worst

with funny images at the start of each character review! DLC companions included! also BIG TIME SPOILERS FOR FALLOUT 4 OKAY 3 2 1 GOOOO!

1. nick valentine - clockwork PI 

positives: he’s a robot detective who loves neon and smokes even though he has no lungs you know he’s a man who appreciates aesthetic.

negatives: none

2. old longfellow - old salty 

positive: grandpa time. he's perfect. this man is everyone's rough and tumble but supportive grandfather. he's a rough block of wood, well worn and with a sense of humor, drinking habits, great dialogue, fantastic personality and can follow you around, he never outwears his welcome. he can even follow you around the commonwealth. rivals nick valentine for best companion to me.negative: i can't really think of ANY.

3. codsworth - lovable orb 

positives: truly a stalwart companion, never abandons you, waited 2 centuries for the player character. it made me upset you couldn't romance them, the character who truly had a connection with you. they're fantastic and the top 3 was a REALLY close call.

negatives: cannot romance, wHY TODD YOU COWARD

4. preston garvey - minutemen general 

positive:  i can't even bring myself to post a jokey image for him he's just that good. god his character is good. he's a broken man, but he still doesn't stop helping others, or giving up hope. he's truly a good person, but not unrealistic. he has his limits, and can bend and break. and unlike other companions strangely, he DOES have more loyalty breaking points than the others, like if you side with raiders he will shoot you on sight. unless you deviate from the carefully curated quest paths in which case aaaaaaa also his backstory good, and i like how he faces his inner demons, altho i wish he'd just take the mantle of general. he honestly deserves it.

DOWNSIDES: ANOTHER SETTLEMENT NEEdS OUR HELP. making any companion a never ending, radiant quest hub, is a BAD FECKIN IDEA BOYO. BUCKO ITS A BAD IDEA. as a result of him being a radiant quest hub, its the onbly thing people know about him, care about, and experience while in game, because before and after every character interaction is something about his radiant quest hub quests. also romancing him feels HORRIBLE just like mac cready.

5. john maccready - ratface 

positives:  Positives, I like snarky mercs. And he had real Scout vibes.Honestly if you forget he existed in any other fallout games, on his own he's a decent companion. I like having him around, he's like that coworker of yours who keeps stealing office supplies but he always has spare smokes if you ask. honestly maccready is like if you dipped piper in the FEV. he's just a better version of her.  she's too heavy handed i'm sorry

negative:  again bethesda's bad design about being afraid of upsetting consumers. because once you finish his personal quest, spoilers getting the cure for his infant son's sickness, he should IMMEDAITELY RETURN TO HIS SON. WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE MAC AND CHEESE. GO RAISE YOUR SON. also romancing him just feels dirty and manipulative. this MAN IS CLEARLY STILL GREIVING FOR HIS DEAD WIFE!!!  most of the romance paths honestly feel dirty and manipulative to me, like you're taking advantage of their friendship and trust in you

6. Ada - actual wife 

positives: i love robots and this is like if curie didn't suck and wasn't born sexy yesterday. she has a character arc and is cool and has personality and also she's made of different robot parts when she starts out and that's cool. her story is good and even her generic lines are charming.

negatives: after the mechanist dlc is over she has no more unique cool things to say, and its sad they didn't prepare enough dialogue for her

7. john danse - paladin pants 

positives: danse is a trooper, he's a boot boy yeah. in literal apocalypse land tho, understandable. also he is loyal to his team and anyone he considers his friends. once he spoilers is exiled from the brotherhood for being a synth and loses his way he does lose some of his hangups, becomes a more thoughtful person. his character arc is good, i like how he ends up.

negatives: holy fuck my cat just jumped in my lap he's like my way or the highway haha. anyways back to pants paladin. like i said he has some hangups, aka his racism from living in the brotherhood, a proto-fascist military cult. but honestly this doesn't make him a bad character, and he does get better from it. i'm gonna be real here the only negative about him is again, THE ROMANCE PATH. IT FEELS SO NEGATIVE AND DIRTY AND MANIPULATIVE. like i see people say he's a bad character but no he's just a bad person. and even then, he does learn and adapt.you can have characters who aren't good people in your stories

8. piper - waifu bait 

positive:  extra extra read all about it, the tracer of fallout 4 not totally a bad thing tho, she's just.obviously the companion you're supposed to like the most.

negative:  her quirkiness has its charms but it can be KINDA much sometimes. also she’s obvious waifu bait. however in the end she's really more a person i'd want to argue with as a friend and hang just chill around she's pushy tho and i don't like being railroaded into certain quests or storybeats.

9. dog - dog 

positive: dog is dog

negative: is not robot detective or butler, but is still good

10. deacon - MY EYES!!! 

positives: charming spy man, so deep in the weeds he doesn't even know his own past or even if he's a synth. that's quirky and cute. he also has that very obvious spy charm of, his disguise is just him wearing clothes. iits funny like superman putting glasses on.

negatives: honestly he's just kinda bland. he's such a mystery wrapped in an enigma locked in a puzzlebox owned by that demon guy with the needles in his head, that there's nothing to know about him. really i can't figure him out. or get to know him.then again some of that is due to trust issues. i mean neat character trait but there's not much for me to consume here.

11. john hancock - anarcho beef jerky 

positive:  he's a pretty free wheeling kinda dude and i like that, he stands up against bad authority, to an extent, and that's where some of my issues crop up

negative:  it could also be blamed on shitty bethesda afraid you wouldn't do certain content if it locked you out of your favorite companions, but he'll stand with you through allying with the institute, the brotherhood, anyone. also his anarchist leadership style has resulted in a lot of issues for his community he doesn't seem keen on fixing or reflecting on anytime soon. also constant substance abuse and he'll encourage you to take on the party hardy lifestyle tooi just look at freeside i mean goodneighbor i mean freeside and i think "man you're supposed to be the king i mean the mayor you should do better". ripoff of the king i'm gonna rip off the bandaid tbh, not even as cool as the king. the king really looked out for freesiders while hancock kinda just... meanders about the place. being mayor with no authority on purpose just makes you, a guy who kills people sometimes.

12. automatron - build-a-bear workshop BUT WITH GUN 

positive: there's a few distinct personality modules and voice actors for the automatron companions, each one is enjoyable, i liked them, and they were all different from each other. i consider them like mini companions. plus being able to build your very own custom robots with any parts you want is the most epic part of this companion.

negative: the dialogue for the voice actor packs is pretty limited, like pretty limited. not a lot to hear before they loop. i'd have to say these are more neutral than even X6-88 for me

13. X6-88: oh that uniquely named courser that showed up as i destroyed the institute, wait he was a companion??? 

positives:

okay negatives time

negatives:for real tho he's just uh, again kind of a Nothing character. not as disappointing as Strong tho. As an institute courser he's just... well he just Is. he exists. doesn't really question his nature tho, or consider what life would be like outside the institute... its like if Danse had no character arc at all and spoilers just stayed in the brotherhood like a good proto-fascist feudalistic power armored boot boy. he feels like a quota like todd howard walked in the design room and said "we need an institute companion" and then the designers said "... fuck. we're almost done with the game's story okay lets cook something up". i'd have to say he's perfectly average. he's like the bland guy from the wendys commercials about how spicy their chicken is

14. porter gage - why do i keep stepping on this rake 

positives: his armor looks cool, and his voice actor is good. i like that a raider character is portrayed by a sneaky advisor type instead of just a chest beating tough guy on chems. porter is an interesting take, and his motivations and methods are interesting.

negatives: his motivations don't make sense though. he's seen over and over in his life that raiders simply are unsustainable and don't work, always breaking apart. yet he... still wants to be a raider, and advise raider gangs? it doesn't make sense. also if you buddy up with him preston will hate you, and you have to eliminate your OWN settlements in the commonwealth. sorry porter but i'm not willing to make that kind of sacrifice at all. he's alright as a character but not really deep. having a backstory doesn't mean you're deep, that's Bethesda Deep™. Bad, no. Die now with the rest of nuka world, gage.

15. strong - fallout 3 was a mistake 

positives: non-human companion, i like that. super mutants are always cool

negatives: lumpy and misshappen as fuck oh god he's like a slab of moldy ribs. also his character? what character? he's just a bog standard super mutant, not even a cool one from the west coast. he's just an orc, a raider painted green with half a brain and a penchant for eating people. he doesn't change or evolve, he's just. he's a Nothing character.

16. curie - born french yesterday 

positives:  so i guess i should start with the positives since that's a trend in this list now. positives! robot, and one that's both aware of how the world's dead but wants to learn, and make it better. i always like robots, and well. uh. robot. i'm out of positives now.

negatives: she is the living embodiment of th e born sexy yesterday trope. profoundly naive, yet unimaginably wise. and spoilers once she gets a SEXAYYYYY human bod from a braindead synth, her naive nature is played up even further as WHAT EEZ DIS STRANGE FEELING UWU I FEEL HORMONE AND LUUUV its bad, its bad its bad. french maid plus nurse wrapped into one, with the mind of a child, aka its the born sexy yesterday trope. and you can only fuc once she's out of the robot body and this makes betheseda COWARDS. LET ME HAVE MY ROBOTS.

17. cait - drug

positive:

negative: commit go away from my game. rude, not fun to be around, substance abuse storyline is NOT handled well. also in boston the one irish character is all fucked up come on man.

[twistednuns]

February 2020

I managed to use my iPad as a second monitor for my computer. So tech savvy. Yay me!

Joking about developing a sex-based cardio programme with Manu. Powerfucking! Might help against aggression as well.

A late night phone call with Tom. Not saying much.

Making a huge pot of my grandmother’s signature veggie stew.

More Bon Appétit test kitchen videos. Chris recreating tacos. Claire making Ben&Jerry’s. Priya making her mum’s Indian curries.

Writing a letter to Lena. Drawing upside down bats (which makes them look like they’re having a wicked dance-off). Just the act of writing. I thoroughly enjoy looking at my handwriting.

Using the Salted Coconut handscrub by Lush. Especially now that I wash my hands so often when we’re working with clay at school. I feel like the peeling triggers some pressure points on my palms.

That Saturday productivity high. Cooking and preparing heaps of stuff, cleaning the windows, doing laundry.

Painting my nails like an expressionist artist.

Some portrait studies. Accidentally drawing Sirius Black.

Being really motivated to improve my Spanish. Working with Lorena, the Duolingo app and even starting my own grammar/vocabulary book.

This ultra quirky ASMR video. Also: watching videos with Erin an her boyfriend Chris. It’s amazing how well they work together. How you can almost feel their connection, how similar they are.

Carrot cake oats.

Seeing the The Darkness live again, this time with Margit. Justin’s outfit and personality, singing along, especially to Time of my Life, the band’s traditional first song after the show.

Meeting Chris. Having a Bramblette cocktail at Pusser’s. I like that place. Feels very old-timey with a rowing boat right under the ceiling. We made out in front of a tiger slide in a toy store window on our way to the next bar.

Peeling fresh carrots.

Pickling onions and making kimchi. My fermentation game is strong these days!

Looking through Dominik’s sketchbook. I loved the tree whose bark resembled a mole burrow with its underground tunnel system.

The flu. Yes, really. Fewer pupils at school. Quiet times. I’m actually surprisingly healthy. I’d guess my probiotics must play a role here… Who knows.

More sourdough experiments. Writing about it (DELICACY - a haiku. Oven-warm sourdough / salted butter, alpine cheese / and a strawberry).

Finding a really interesting list of SanFran hippie era book recommendations at the end of Robin Sloan’s Ajax Penumbra: 1969. In the mood to read Maya Angelou, Tom Wolfe, Jack Kerouac, Richard Brautigan.

Even more beautiful books: I really enjoyed Die weiße Stadt by Karolina Ramqvist, a feminist author from Sweden, and the graphic novel version of To Kill a Mockingbird. But two books that literally (well, figuratively obviously) blew my mind were Circe by Madeline Miller (mythology, loneliness, animals and plants, magic and monsters, some desperate kind of feminism, independence and strength) and Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo (magical realms, university setting, psychological depth, unexpected twists and turns). I haven’t read anything comparable in a very long time and I desperately hope that there’s more to come from these authors.

A beach collecting all the world’s single socks in The Magicians. Oh and of course seeing them break the moon. What a sight. The show is super confusing, obnoxious and absolutely fabulous at the same time. Best example: the Freaky Friday szene in which Margo and Eliot switch bodies. I love how the actors took on each other’s speech patterns and behaviour.

A new addition to my colour vocabular: celadon (a greyish green; there is a type of ceramics you’ll only see in this colour which is not surprising since the shade provides such an interesting contrast to the the earthy, rusty orange of burnt clay.)

Manu telling me that he had rarely seen people with more joy in their eyes than me (“Ich habe schon Freude in deinen Augen gesehen! So ein Leuchten kann man nicht simulieren.”) after complaining about being bored and lifeless. / Making curry with or, well, for him the other night. Drinking Liqueur 43 with cinnamon and milk. Playing the Jackbox party games for which you can use your phone as a controller.

Finding myself in a well-known sitation from the past. Lying in Frank’s bed in the early morning hours, not that tired yet, when he starts talking about his life and his depression. In English, obviously, because that’s our emotional filter. Relating, since I feel quite similar. Coming up with a suggestion for a reciprocal support system. Let’s see what we can do for each other.

Looking at travel photographs. The sea, the cenotes. Longing to go back to Mexico or Australia. Diving. Taking it all in.

Dreaming of my grandmother talking about her biggest regrets in life. Weirdly she was in a little bundle under a coffee table, much like Voldemort in the last Harry Potter movie.

My weird, weird brain. How both pleasure and pain enhance my sense of smell and increase my brain activity, almost causing hallucinations and fixations on ideas. Like geometric shapes in gloomy off-colours and a beige silicon-like surface the other night. All I could think of was a benchscraper.

Blue eyeliner.

Brainstorming three-letter-words with Frank since I’m thinking of getting personalised Nike Blazers. Sad cat. Yes but. Dat ass. Why tho.

Flying squirrels. Watching them wobble through the air. How they look like cute exhibitionist when they’re extending their limbs and thus stretching their, well, let’s just call it wings.

The fact that red cabbage has an intricate pattern like brain convolutions when you cut it open.

Talking to Sonja for the first time in over two years. What a strange person. Interesting, too. At least in homeopathic doses.

Ripe strawberries and nectarines. Oh my god. I love fruit.

Meeting Eve at Pub Quiz. She identifies as female, loves swing dance, used to be an animator and I love her style. Also, I realised that really like Betty. And Dennis wasn’t mean to me for once. I love my nerd friends <3 And I learned that Starbucks was named after the first mate in Moby Dick! Also, coincidentally they asked a question about the city where To Kill a Mockingbird takes place (Maycombe, Alabama) after I had read it the week before.

Inviting Lorena to the Botanical Gardens. I always feel very happy and very much myself when I’m there. I sometimes wish I was a gardener. Lorena was late so I walked along the Spring Path outside and it might have been the first time I’ve seen a brussels sprouts plant. Inside I learned lots of Spanish words and marveled at the incredible butterflies. The huge yellow one right behind the entrance was my favourite. Its delicate feelers were fascinating.

Washing my hands at the Keg’s bathroom. Looking into the mirror. Suddenly thinking of the perfect karaoke song… Rescue Me by Bell Book and Candle! I kept singing it for days on repeat. My neighbour must hate me (nothing new here) especially since my voice is too low for the chorus.

It isn’t hard to see how such attachment patterns can undermine mental health. Both anxious and avoidant coping have been linked to a heightened risk of anxiety, depression, loneliness, eating and conduct disorders, alcohol dependence, substance abuse and hostility. The way to treat these problems, say attachment theorists, is in and through a new relationship. On this view, the good therapist becomes a temporary attachment figure, assuming the functions of a nurturing mother, repairing lost trust, restoring security, and instilling two of the key skills engendered by a normal childhood: the regulation of emotions and a healthy intimacy. // An interesting article on attachment styles and why theraphy works; it makes me want to learn more about attachment theory. This School of Life video is a nice addition as well.

That dream. About a book shop modeled after my picture of Penumbra’s 24-hour bookstore. There was an old man in a very narrow but high-ceilinged room full of books. There was no light source except for moonlight or some street lights. There were loads of stairs, very steep, leading to the back of the house. Upstairs the man would set out cat food and on the rooftop there was an old sailing boat. One day the man decided to open the door to the roof and let visitors see the ship, much like a museum; perhaps to attract customers. However, in the next night a cat-shaped ghost appeared who reminded me quite a lot of Kot Behemoth character in Mikhail Bulgakov’s The Master and Margarita. The ghost was not amused about the old man’s decision and took away his key, a big golden one adorned with a red ribbon.

Toasted sesame makes pretty much every dish so much better.

Watching High Fidelity with gorgeous Zoe Kravitz (I adore her effortless style and her outfits), getting in the mood for making a playlist and listening to more music in general. There are all these great songs out there I forgot about.

Remembering the xkcd storm chaser comics.

Making a wicked good batch of Pho for Tom.

Spending a nice evening with Alex at Shamrock. Singing along to American Boy by Estelle. Confirming the hypothesis that the nerdy, quiet ones usually have a freak streak. That moment in the morning. Eye contact and kegel exercises.

Karaoke with Margit and Betty. Meeting Manu’s doppelganger. Same type, looks, voice. Eerie.

Making a BA Gourmet Makes meme for Steffen after he had passed his law examps. Strangely Gaby kinda looked like him after I was done with it.

Saturday morning in bed. Reading comics and graphic novels. Fresh bedclothes, surrounded by books. Since it was February 29 I thought about leap years and asked a few friends what their inner seven-year-old would have done that day (based on the thought experiment that your birthday was on February 29 and you’d age in 4-year-steps which would divide your age by 4 obviously).      

I came up with: visiting grandma / eating Cini-Minis / falling asleep with my face buried in a cat / beating my neighbour Anna at Memory / drawing while listening to a Bibi Blocksberg cassette.

Alex said he’d have been outside all day, building a snow igloo. Not noticing his mum telling him to come to dinner. If the weather had been bad he would have played with his dinosaur collection. His inner 7-year-old was a hopeless dreamer who got agitated whenever his parents had a fight. Who came home late from school every day because he forgot about time when he was talking to his friend next to a hedge with thorns that looked like tiny airplanes.

Lena said she would have been outside all day long, playing in the mud with the neighbours’ kids. Of course.

[artlessictoan]

Lovely work for Kiba/Chouji! I'm a chouji hoe so if you could do something were it's basically a ouran highschool host club cliche and everyone is trying to win his heart and the poor boy is oblivious to it all (take your pick of a few chars to add would love to see sasuke tho!)

okok I haven’t watched ouran in yonks so I don’t remembermuch about it, but I am all kinds of intocho being Everybody’s Not So Secret Crush

---

“Hey, Chouji!”

The call stopped him in his tracks, halfway through lockinghis front door. Hand still hanging in the air, he twisted round to see the ballof yellow and orange bounding towards him. “Hey Naruto,” he said with a smile,as he finished turning the key and stepped back to properly greet his friend,“you sound happy today.”

“Super happy! Sakura handed my ass to me in trainingyesterday, gave me a concussion and everything!”

He blinked, frowned and then blinked again. “And that’s… agood thing?”

The blond chuckled, awkwardly rubbing his neck. “Well notthe getting injured bit, that hurt,but after she healed me she got really panicky – even though I’m fine! – andforbade me from training and missions for at least three days, doctors’ ordersso Kakashi-sensei can’t complain.” Suddenly an arm was draped across hisshoulders, pulling him into Naruto’s side. “Sooo, I figured that since I’ve gotthe day off anyway I should spend it having some fun, so whaddya say, wannahang out? All day, just you and me?”

His warm, friendly grin was as inviting as always and helooked so genuinely excited at the prospect, even waggling his eyebrows at him,which made what Chouji had to say next all the more difficult.

“Sorry Naruto, I’ve got stuff to take care of today-” blueeyes started to look far too watery for his liking, so he rushed to comfort him“-but we should totally do something soon! Maybe get lunch tomorrow?”

The grin was instantly back on his face. “Really?”

Chouji smiled and clapped a hand on his shoulder as hedisentangled himself and started walking backwards down the street.“Definitely,” he called out as the distance between them grew wider, “we shouldinvite Ino and Shikamaru too! And your team, let’s get everyone together!”

Whatever Naruto’s reply was, it got lost to the breeze asChouji jogged into town to make up lost time. He was already looking forwardsto tomorrow, it was always nice to hang out with friends.

---

When he got there, the market crowds were at the perfectdensity; not so tightly packed that you couldn’t move without touching sevenother people, but not so empty as to feel vaguely creepy. He always lovedcoming here on days like these, just to take the time to casually browse thestores, maybe pick out things to tell his friends and family about the nexttime he saw them, but today he had a packed schedule, so he headed to the foodstalls with determined steps.

The shopkeeper called a greeting the second he steppedinside, as he always did for his regular customers, before ducking into thestore-room with the promise of returning with some produce he’d kept backespecially for him.

As he waited for the elderly man to return, Chouji glancedaround the shop, planning to pick up a few vegetables, when he noticed afamiliar head of dark hair.

“Hinata!” he said cheerfully, as he stepped up beside her,apparently catching her off guard with how high he jumped. “Sorry, didn’t meanto scare you, how are you doing?”

She quickly caught her breath, though it took her a fewmoments to stop staring at him with wide eyes. “O-oh, I’m fine, thank you,” shesaid, stumbling over her words until she dropped her head to focus on herfingers twisting along the handles of her shopping basket, “how are you?”

“I’m great thanks, you out doing a little shopping?” heasked, more to give her a gentle opening to a real conversation than out of anyactual doubt.

Her long, straight hair bobbed up and down with her slightnod, before she nervously glanced up at him from under her fringe. “A-a-a-” herlips pulled into a thin line at the word stubbornly sticking in her throat, buthe just smiled encouragingly and waited for her to collect herself; she hatedwhen people tried to guess what she wanted to say. “…You also?”

He grinned at her, turning to look through the displays,picking up onions and giving them a critical inspection “Yup, Ino and Shikamaruare coming over for dinner and I feel like making something I’ve never triedbefore, Karui sent me some Kumo recipes I’ve been itching to try out!”

She smiled softly at him, though didn’t make eye contact.“That sounds lovely.”

“If there’s any leftovers I’ll remember to bring you sometomorrow so you can try it out too,” he said, finally deciding which was themost delicious-looking vegetable. He handed it to his friend and took thesecond-best one for himself.

Neck snapping, she turned to him with wide eyes and wavinghands. “O-o-oh, n-no, that’s n-ot, n-n-n-”

“It’s no problem, I’m happy to share!” The creak of a dooropening drew his attention back to the grocer trundling back in with a cratepacked full of bright greens and reds and yellows, he gave the man a thumbs-upbefore turning back to Hinata, ready to quickly say their goodbyes when henoticed something off. Leaning down to get a better look at her face, hefrowned. “You’re looking a little red, are you feeling ok?”

“I-I-I-”

He pressed a hand to her burning forehead. “It’s pretty hottoday, maybe you should sit down for a while-”

“I will be fine thank you!” Having practically screamed inhis face, she stiffly turned around, flew to the checkout counter, dropped ahandful of coins and ran out of the store before Chouji could even think tostop her.

Walking over to the shopkeeper, he gave him a sheepish grin.“Sorry, I think the weather must be getting to her.”

The man shook his head, idly poking at the coins on thecounter. “Well, next time you see her tell her she’s got over five-hundred ryōin change waiting for her.”

---

Finished with the markets and all his shopping carefullypacked away in a sealing scroll, his next destination was the academy.

He’d only recently taken up teaching and he was still alittle overwhelmed by it at times, but he had to admit that he loved hisoccasional guest lessons, they were a good way to get in some practice dealingwith children before he got a genin team of his own one day; the most importantlesson he’d learned thus far being neverlet sticky-fingered kids chewing bubble gum play with his hair, no matter howbig and watery they could make their eyes go.

His head felt so naked with it cut short.

“Ah, Akimichi-sensei,” the receptionist said as he steppedthrough the academy doors, “your lesson starts in fifteen minutes, your TA isalready in classroom five-B waiting for you.”

He frowned, he was getting a teaching assistant? Since when?Walking the familiar halls, feet knowing the exact path to take even withouthis mind’s input. By the time he gingerly peaked through the door, he’d cookedup at least seven awful scenarios in his head, but they all flew out the windowonce he saw who it was in there.

“Neji?”

The other man started and turned to face him, giving one ofhis slight smiles when he saw him. “Hello Chouji, I was beginning to wonder ifyou were coming.”

“I try not to get here too early,” he said, walking fullyinto the room and marching over to the huge blackboard covering one wall, “lesstime to get anxious, y’know? What are you doing here anyway, when thereceptionist said there would be a TA, I kinda figured it would be someone toevaluate me or something…” He trailed off at a sudden horrible thought. “That’snot why you’re here, is it?”

Neji shook his head, observing closely as he started writingthe lesson-plan up on the board. “Nothing like that, it was just… suggested tome that I should take up teaching. To improve my people skills.”

He frowned, pausing his scribbling long enough to look overhis shoulder. “Suggested?”

“Tenten’s idea-” the man grimaced “-the busybody found outthat you were giving classes and thought it would be a good opportunity for me.”

Finishing off his sentence, Chouji nodded and grinned wideas he replied, “That’s awesome! It’s definitely a learning experience, but Ibet you’ll be great at it once you’ve spent some time with the kids, though I reallydon’t see how you’re bad at talking to people, you’re always so nice when wemeet up.”

“…I need to… find… someone, please excuse me.” Neji was outof the door before he’d even finished his sentence.

---

His class went well, even though his new assistant had spentmost of it standing in the furthest corner of the room staring at the walls.

Chouji never would’ve guessed the guy got stage-fright sobad.

The next port of call was the Hokage tower, where he wasexpected to assist with some new international treaties being worked out.Politics wasn’t exactly his area of expertise, but he’d made many friendsduring the war, from all over the five nations; at some point he’d become avaluable advisor to the Hokage, as he could offer insight into the way the commonfolk of other nations thought and how they might be affected by big policy changes.

He hadn’t been expecting to bump into the Kazekage and hissiblings on their way out.

Temari was the first to see him, waving and jogging over. “Heythere stranger, it’s been too long!” she said, grinning and giving him a tighthug.

“It has,” he agreed, returning the embrace before pullingback to smile at the two men wandering over, “what’re you guys doing here? Ihadn’t heard of any big diplomatic summits coming up.”

The younger brother nodded, giving him that same intensestare he always gave his closest friends – it was a little weird, but once he’dbeen assured that it was just him trying to be friendly in his own awkward wayhe’d found the attention mush easier to bear. “There aren’t, this is aninformal visit, to catch up with friends. Like you.”

He smiled, hiding a tiny blush beneath his hand. “Aww, that’snice of you to say, you must have a lot of people you want to see.”

Gaara’s stare didn’t waver in the slightest. “I suppose.”

A heavy hand clapped down onto his shoulder, Temari shookhim lightly. “Who’s got time for those other losers? You’re the best bit ofKonoha, everyone knows that!”

Several steps behind his siblings, Kankuro slapped a hand tohis face.

He laughed, nudging the tall blonde back. “You’re too kind.”

“No, she is correct, any time spent with you is a true pleasure,”Gaara said, face blank but voice earnest and as happy-sounding as he ever got.

Temari glared at him, her grip on Chouji’s shouldertightening slightly. “Yes, which is why I said it. First.”

In the background, Kankuro groaned.

The Kazekage sniffed, drawing himself up as high as he could– which wasn’t much, but he was trying his best. “Why don’t you go and trackdown Shikamaru, oneesan? I’m sure he’dlove to see you again.”

Nails were digging through his shirt. “Why don’t you go andfind Naruto, otouto?”

Kankuro had an expression of pure despair. “Guys, please,just stop.”

“Because Chouji is here now and I would like to spend timewith him.” Gaara’s glare was deadly enough to make him start to worry, just a little.

“And you think I don’t?”

“I swear to-”

“No,” the redhead said, cutting off his brother and steppingcloser to glare up at his big sister, “I think that you monopolise his timeevery time we come here, oneesan and would like the opportunity to spend timewith my friends too.”

He risked a nervous cough, but no one seemed to notice. Was shestarting to break skin with her tight grip?

Temari scoffed, finally retracting her arm to cross themover her chest, leaning down to stare her little brother dead in the eye. “Areyou gonna stop me?”

Chouji coughed again, holding up a hand and weakly saying, “Excuseme,” but it made little-to-no impact.

“If you two don’t stop I’m disowning the pair of you.”Kankuro’s input went unnoticed too.

“No, because I am a good brother, who wouldn’t jeopardise mysiblings’ relationships for personal gain.”

The cold fury in Temari’s grin sent a chill down his spine. “Youlittle-”

“Oookay!” Chouji shouted, quickly sidestepping the argumentand pointing intently at the tower. “I’ve got a meeting to get to, it was, uh… funseeing you guys again!”

Kankuro’s loud cackle followed him, ever after the doorsslammed shut behind him.

He snickered to himself as he rushed to the meeting he wasprobably now late for; weird as they were, he was fond of the three and their intense,but ultimately affectionate bickering. It must be nice to have siblings.

---

It had been a long day for Chouji and it would be longer stillby the time he’d gotten home and prepared dinner for his teammates.

He decided to take a detour through the nearby park anyway,he’d always liked seeing the flowers.

They looked especially beautiful the evening, turned shadesof gold and red under the setting sun, a lone bee still roaming even with nightrapidly falling. And it was pleasantly quiet, most people home with theirfamilies by now – he felt like he had the entire park to himself.

A sharp crack to his left caught his attention, he turnedcautiously, but wasn’t expecting an actual enemy attack, not in the middle ofthe village.

When he saw who it was lurking in the shadows, he completelyrelaxed and waved a greeting. “Sasuke, how are you?”

The man muttered something under his breath, but he didn’tlook distressed, so Chouji decided that he was probably fine. “You out for a walk to?” he asked, slowly restartinghis walk, as his friend matched his pace. “It’s a lovely evening for it.”

“Yeah.”

Ok then, Sasuke didn’t feel like talking today – not surprising,he rarely did – but that was fine with him, it was just as nice to have someoneto quietly wander through the park with sometimes.

They walked together slowly, Chouji humming a song that hadbeen stuck in his head recently, his friend zigzagging as they followed thewinding paths, sometimes drifting close enough that their swinging arms couldalmost touch, before rapidly veering away until they could easily be mistaken fortwo strangers who just happened to be walking in the same direction. He alwaysended up closing the distance again after a few minutes though.

As the sky was beginning to turn purple above them, Choujisuddenly frowned and slowed to a halt, Sasuke following his lead a few steps later.

He stared back at him with a question in his dark eyes.

“Wait, isn’t your place back over that way?” Chouji said,pointing at when the path had branched in two directions several feet ago.

Sasuke looked a little surprised, though whether it was atChouji’s knowledge of where he lived or himself forgetting was unclear. “…Yeah.”

He smiled and started walking again, giving his friend ashort wave as he passed, saying, “Well, guess this is where we split up then,it was nice seeing you, hope you have a good evening!” before he finally turnedaway to rush to his own home; he’d spent a lot of the day dallying, now he hadto rush home and get ready to see his best friends!

---

“Damn, that was delicious, Karui really knows her food, huh?”

Ino scoffed, flipping her long hair dramatically inShikamaru’s face. “Of course she does, any girlfriend of mine must have impeccable taste.”

He grinned at his two friends childishly swatting at eachother as he gathered up the dishes and depositing them in the sink. He leftthem to soak in some hot water – Ino had drawn washing-up duty tonight andShikamaru would be in charge of drying and putting away – before returning tothe table and flopping back down in his chair, taking a long sip of his tea.

“Long day?” Shikamaru asked, finally disentangling himselffrom Ino’s long, crushing arms.

Chouji nodded. “Yup, though it’s weird, I ran into loads offriends today, but everyone was acting kinda… strange.”

Ino cocked a fine brow, asking, “Strange how?”

“All sorts of ways, Naruto wanted to hang out even though hewas injured, Hinata looked really feverish, Neji was all nervous about observingmy class, Temari and Gaara were bickering and Sasuke was being all spacy,” hesaid, shrugging his shoulders as he thought about it harder, “maybe the hotweather we’ve been having is just getting to people.”

There was a long, heavy silence, prompting him to glance upat his friends. They were sharing an unreadable look, identical crooked smirks ontheir faces as they rolled their eyes in perfect unison.

“Wait, do you two know something? Seriously- why are youlaughing, what’s so funny, is this some prank I’m not in on? Guys-”

---

[alexisdesignsstuff]

Designing a Greeting Card Kiosk

By Alexis Kim

OVERVIEW:

I am designing and prototyping a greeting card kiosk. It will be a vending machine that sells cards and stickers to high school students. I researched purchasing general purchasing behaviors and then tested my concept to refine the

EARLY RESEARCH:

Papyrus:

Huge selection of greeting cards.

Birthday section is biggest.

Cards are very unique and artful.

Lots of different styles of design.

Humor/joke designs, minimalistic, physical decorations, art heavy, vintage, graphic design, animals, shiny etc.

Feels more marketed towards female purchasers.

Empty. No customers inside at 10:30 am.

Older Lady in her 60’s. Walgreens, 9/19/18: “It’s so difficult to find a good card. Usually buy from Nordstrom. It’s more expensive but better selection and designs. Buying card for a friend who is having a 60 something birthday. Like Papyrus much more. It’s more beautiful and has lots of beautiful cards. Every one of them is beautiful but each one is $10 - $7. $4.99 is an ok price. I’ve been looking here for half an hour. I have problems with knees that’s why I’m here at Walgreens (easier to get to). Ideally a perfect shopping experience, every card is beautiful. A less nice looking card is ok for someone I don’t really know. Less wording inside is better. Going to look at Papyrus now.”

Middle aged man with British accent. Target, 9/19/18: “I bought these [2 humor cards] because I have a warped sense of humor. It’s for my 17 year old son’s birthday. I spent less than 10 minutes looking for them. I’ll give the first one to him 1st thing in the morning. It’ll be the first thing he see’s and he’ll laugh all day about it. And the second golf card is to accompany his gift; I got him a voucher for golf lessons. It’s a spur of the moment thing, and I buy cards for close family only. It’s typical male humor. I’m happy with it.”

Young professional Female, late 30’s. Target, 9/19/18: Observations: She’s scanning and browsing. Take a step back to see. Look at messages in the Thank You section. Scan first. Message is important.“Giving this to thank a close friend who has been really supportive. I’m going through a big career change and its to thank her for believing in me. My eye goes to the bit above the fold. I’m attracted to fonts, bright colors. I like a mix of modern and unique. I like puns sometimes. I don’t like preachy, cliche, or old, traditional looking cards that my grandma would give. Would rather write my own sentiments. If there’s a lot of words I’ll just glaze over it and lose interest. Sometimes I find something very thoughtful and written in a way I wouldn’t have thought of and appreciate those.  Trader Joe’s has really killer 99 cent cards that I’ll buy a bunch of in advance. I’ll pay $3.99 for an nonembelished card. Something fancy like with rhinestones $4.99. Those kinds of cards are for someone really special and if I gave it to them in person. If mailing, I’ll pick something really flat. Looking here at Target because I’m picking up something for lunch. It’s convenient. Papyrus normally has good stuff. Paper Source has unique/off beaten path and random ones. I’ll buy a months worth of cards at Trader Joe’s and line them up for the month. My friends are so grateful to get real mail these days. It’s so worth it to make them feel so good for just $1.50. Minted - it’s an online order stationary store. Funny and unique. I like to buy cards in advance and hold onto it for months. For example, if I find a good romance one for my boyfriend, I’ll give it to him later. These days I’m also attracted to funny cards if I want to have fun or want to give someone a laugh."

CONCEPTING

CONCEPT TESTING

Q1: What do you think is going on here? (to learn if your concept is clear)

Q2: What questions do you have? (find out where it's not clear)

Q3: What would you change and why? (find out how they would improve it.)

Q4: Who do you think would use this? (if they would, they will tell you so. If not, listen and learn.)

Q5: Any ideas to add? (capture their ideas; you do not need to use these ideas, but you must listen to them.)

Gina K.17, texting her while she’s in yearbook class; 9/24/18

“So basically someone can buy these stickers or whatever is gonna be on there for cheap b/c like most students don’t keep a lot of money on them or just don’t have a lot in general. These stickers can be for like things to make things look better (in the storyboard) but in general for funnies. I think things like stickers can be used for many things. B/c right now a lot of people like to put stickers on their water bottles. The origami one is unclear. The secret message I like but I’m not sure if people would get the point?? Or like use it b/c I feel like there are a lot more ways now to do secret messages or something. idk we just like use our phones lol. I think it’s a great idea but I’m not sure if a lot of people would use it. And as for the storyboard… Not many people write letters now. I think if you do something handwritten it might be more of a girl thing nowadays??? Thinking about it I do think boys would use it but it does appeal more to girls in terms of most of the things you could use with these products. I think for the way you’re using the stickers in the storyboard you might wanna replace them with girls? Maybe not thank you cards but I can see birthday cards for those who forgot about someone’s birthday. I don’t know about boys but we girls typically just give them their gift and are like happy birthday! And sometimes watch them open their gift. I do find it a pain when it comes to getting bday cards b/c I have to go out to get them lol. And i try to make them but sometimes I just don’t have time. Depends but yea [we give presents] at lunch or b4 school. Lunch is more probable tho. My friends and I still give birthday cards, and I have some but they are just really kiddy lol. Like for someone in elementary school. So if it’s someone I’m not close to I don’t feel comfortable giving it to them lol. We have birthdays almost every 3 months or so. I think the product is ok. The storyboard you might wanna change them to girls and make it like a card instead but you can still incorporate stickers. If you wanna keep them as boys it would be like oh crap I forgot it’s so and so bday and get them like a card with stickers (like its the gift) and give it to the friend. I think it’s good to have the part where it shows that you can buy the product for a cheap price. It’s common for someone not knowing someone’s birthday until the day of. B/c most people don’t tell others what their birthday is unless they ask. The forgetting and the convenience of it is good b/c we are at school 5 days a week and at least like 6 hours lol. I think girls would use this mostly.

Valentyn T.32, phone call; 9/24/18

"The storyboard is trying to describe how using a sticker can increase value of letter. What’s the relationship between Shawn and Fred? It’s kind of weird. Feels girly. It’s feels fine if it's two girls who are friends. It’s also weird if a boy was writing to a letter to a girl. When I was student girls like stickers; boys don’t like stickers. Maybe you should make stickers have more value to differentiate them. Like some stickers can be really rare like pokemon. Or make some of them tattoo stickers. Target seems pretty limited to school kids."

Stacey T.31, texting her while she’s at work; 9/24/18

“Probably the one thing that sticks out it is the ‘I’m so poor’ comment. It has god in it, and it also is making a social commentary that spending only $5 is cause for someone to say with despair ‘God I’m so poor.’ I might be the wrong person to ask for feedback on Something like this because I’ve also been poor, though not as poor as there are people in the world, and hearing something like that riles me up. But everything else is lovely. Pretty straightfoward (what’s going on). Though it’s hard to tell where everything is happening. If you didn’t tell me at the start that this machine is in a high school… Maybe it’s a San Francisco thing, but growing up, I wouldn’t be able to bring cupcakes to a friend. I took the bus to school, and I didn’t have a way of getting to a grocery store or cupcake store bakery whatever. I wouldn’t connect with this experience unless I grew up in a city with those amenities. Nor did I even have $5 to spend, maybe in the summer when I had a job. But I think all of what I just said is coming from the far that it’s disjointed, the comic strip/storyboard. I liked the big hug in the end. [Who would use this?] Kids collecting stickers and fighting over who has the most coolest ones; Kids with money; Kids wanting to hack the machine so they can get them out for free; Maybe teachers. Beware of the angry parents who might not like things being sold to their kids in a school setting."

REVISED CONCEPT

I changed the persona to a female as all of my test subjects remarked that the cards and stickers would more likely be bought be females. I made sure to include in the Persona details about the student’s busy life and inability to get around independently. I also changed the storyboard to reflect the last minute and convenient nature of the purchase.