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#learning to appreciate whats around me
ruporas · 1 year
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i killed. i murdered. i'm nothing like these sleepy people here… nevertheless, you can actually be grateful? bastard… i’m saying… thank you. because you spilled blood, you saved all of these people’s lives. i couldn’t have done it without you. (ID in alt)
#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d wolfwood#trigun#trigun maximum#participated in altades' dance collab :3 very grateful for the opportunity and many thanks to them for organizing this!#there was a lot of vw arc choices... but i went for the leonof arc bc it's a dear vw moment to me#i think a lot of the leonof arc further breaks down vash's ideology and for the readers - together with ww- to learn that his ideals aren't#pure naivety and that vash knows he's at an odd standpoint with himself. he's criticized ww for shooting rai-dei just prior when ww had don#so on the behalf of vash but here he thanks him for killing on behalf of his home and its genuine. bc vash's presence - although it's not#his fault - he was the reason leonof and gray had gotten to the ship and killed people there. that's the guilt he has to live with and#despite his anger he'd still resolute not to kill. meanwhile ww just did what he had to - beating down on a seemingly immortal monster but#at the core made up of many lives he had to take and i feel as the fight dragged on - his own mentality waned. committing active carnage#while remembering the orphanage... and bearing that guilt alongside the words vash left with him during rai-dei's death#only for vash to thank him afterwards what he's done and for apologizing for pushing his beliefs on ww when he had no solutions of his own#anyway. i just have so an immense love for this arc bc they just got around to appreciating each other in weird ways. though ofc its still#weird and confusing for ww bc every new info on vash it'll just be strange to him as someone who's human#ruporas art
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luedelouartandwriting · 3 months
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i've been burnt out and unable to draw for basically the last two years, but i wanna try and pull myself out of it. so here is a teeny kabumisu for pride month.
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dawnthefluffyduck · 10 months
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Happy 1st anniversary to Looking Glasses by @ferronickel :) (edit; whoops forgot to remove the space in the tag, sorry i know you've already seen it haha)
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puppytoast · 3 months
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Me glancing at steam d@wntrail reviews
robert downy jr meme: They are missing the point that this is a slow journey before destination story about trying to sincerely learn about, communicate with and work with others because we all have differing perspectives and lives that could benefit one another. That we should not jump to judgements of people we only see the basic surface of because there is always a reason for people's actions. That everyone is worth saving, yeah even that one that did unforgivable shit.
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aeolianblues · 28 days
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I'm not an extrovert. At all. In everyday life, I'm a yapper, sure, but I need someone to first assure me I am okay to yap, so I don't start conversations, even when I really want to join in sometimes! It's just the social anxiety acting up. God knows where from and why I lose a lot of my inhibitions when it comes to talking to people about music. I don't know where the confidence has suddenly sprung from. I've made a crazy amount of friends in musical circles, either just talking to people about common music or (since it is after all in music circles) talking to bands about their own music. I let out a sigh of relief any time an interaction goes well, because in truth it's going against my every instinct. I wish I could do that in everyday life
#like that's the point where we need to remind everyone around me that as much as I say#radio is 'a job'-- it's not 'my job' lol. I wish I was this interested in data science#but like. Honestly?? I'm not even a data scientist!? I answered a few questions about classical AI having come from a computer science back#background and now people are saying to me 'I know you're a data scientist and not a programmer' sir I am a computer scientist#what are you on about#and like I guess I get to google things and they're paying me so I'm not complaining but like I am not a data scientist#my biggest data scientist moment was when I asked 'do things in data science ever make sense???' and a bunch of data scientists went#'no :) Welcome to the club' ???????#why did I do a whole ass computer science degree then. Does anyone at all even want that anymore. Has everything in the realm of#computer science just been Solved. What of all the problems I learned and researched about. Which were cool. Are they just dead#Ugh the worst thing the AI hype has done rn is it has genuinely required everyone to pretend they're a data scientist#even MORE than before. I hate this#anyway; I wish I didn't hate it and I was curious and talked to many people in the field#like it's tragicomedy when every person I meet in music is like 'you've got to pursue this man you're a great interviewer blah blah blah'#and like I appreciate that this is coming from people who themselves have/are taking a chance on life#but. I kinda feel like my career does not exist anymore realistically so unless 1) commercial radio gets less shitty FAST#2) media companies that are laying off 50% of their staff miraculously stop or 3) Tom Power is suddenly feeling generous and wants#a completely unknown idiot to step into the biggest fucking culture show in the country (that I am in no way qualified for)#yeah there's very very little else. There's nothing else lol#Our country does not hype. They don't really care for who you are. f you make a decent connection with them musically they will come to you#Canada does not make heroes out of its talent. They will not be putting money into any of that. Greenlight in your dreams.#this is something I've been told (and seen) multiple times. We'll see it next week-- there are Olympic medallists returning to uni next wee#no one cares: the phrase is 'America makes celebrities out of their sportspeople'; we do not. Replace sportspeople with any public professi#Canada does not care for press about their musicians. The only reason NME sold here was because Anglophilia not because of music journalism#anyway; personal
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oh-okay-kay · 1 month
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i feel like im starting to experience emotions more, might be due to a couple months ago stopping taking my anxiety/depression/ocd meds because i couldnt get more refills? but whatever reason why, its wild
ive always been 'low empathy', and never ever could feel actual excitement or sadness when i was supposed to. i remember opening the letter to find out i was accepted to an art school when i was 10, my mom was filming, all i could say was 'yay' and try to act like i felt anything about it. i knew i was happy, but nothing in me could show it or even really *feel* it. i never cried when sad things happen, only out of frustration or if something was particularly triggered. its honestly awful sometimes to live like this and just.. be incapable of attachment or emotions, or attempting to comfort someone having it be forced and practised because it feels so foreign
but now im starting to cry more, which is a start i suppose. particularly at words, its like i can finally feel the *meaning* and emotions of a speech or song, rather than there being the feeling of a squeeze in my chest or usually nothing at all. i cant tell if i like it or not lol! its so weird, youre telling me folks are supposed to be feeling this way? nuts
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I love learning ASL it’s so good. Makes me happy to learn it. I’m so glad my university has classes for it with professors actually steeped in Deaf culture.
#blue chatter#am I good at ASL? hahahahahahaha. no.#ASL and English grammar are incredibly different and even when I remember my vocab I am easily clockable as hearing#but I do have some language capacity now. enough to communicate the basics.#and I just. genuinely really enjoy it. it’s fun to learn and engaging in a way most of my classes just aren’t.#and I can. yanno. communicate respectfully w Deaf ppl. and learn about their culture#which is incredibly important given that I want to go into a field where there is a higher incidence than typical of Deaf people#autistic? you’re more likely to be Deaf!#not to mention the fact that sign language can sometimes be a useful alternative to speech for nonspeaking/nonverbal people#depending on the person obvi; some nonspeaking/nonverbal autistics cannot use sign language and that’s okay#but surely at some point I will encounter either a Deaf client or a nonspeaking/nonverbal client who uses ASL#and when that time comes I should have some idea of how to communicate with them#I also rly like the Deaf church by my parents’ house#their community is really welcoming and their services are really interesting#I think it’s rly cool how they take intentions directly from the congregation#they’ll raise their hands and then sign what their intention is from their pew to the ambo#which is rly neat#it is funny bc every time I go the Deaf ppl I talk to will tell each other ‘go slow she’s hearing’#which is ENTIRELY fair bc. I am hearing. and I do need them to go slower.#but it also makes me laugh bc truly everyone knows within a few minutes.#oh hey the new person? they’re hearing. yeah they’re learning ASL at college. sign slowly for her.#which again makes sense bc a big Deaf culture thing is keeping ppl informed. it’s not gossip it’s getting everyone on the same page.#Deaf ppl do NOT beat around the bush that is like the height of rudeness to them. u say what u mean goshdangit. do not waste their time.#which I appreciate the heck out of bc i don’t have to try and phrase things delicately or w/e#it was also funny bc my mom came w me while I was home for Christmas and they asked her if I was her kid#and she said yes. and the lady running the kid’s craft corner thing was like ‘great you’re doing a craft now’#and I’m sitting there. visibly over 18 years old. amongst several seven year olds. trying desperately to figure out how to say hot glue gun#I made a v pretty pinecone tree it was a lot of fun ^-^
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arikihalloween · 7 months
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honestly you and the others should just report all those fakes
you get some fuckers who come up with stupid fish barnabys
some greyscale Wally ripoffs
and of course that retard fucking glitch barnaby
you and everyone else behind wttmv are superior
love your work hope you get rid of the stupidass copies
Wow, that is a lot of anger and frustration to process, it seems
Go to the corner to think about it while I show why this is bad fandom behavior
Now now, it's my birthday today, so I am allowed bitch ranting and I'll be a bitch for once
Hey, hi, don't fucking say that
People like that are the reason creators abandon their aus, and yeah, one of the reason wttmv is in pause
We lost motivation due to school, busy life, ect, but also because people keep coming at us with this mentality
I get that you like our work, and it would be flattering, if you didn't put others down to compliment wttmv
I can't stand this behavior
Let people tell their stories !
It's inspired from other works, so what ? Humans get inspired all the time
WTTMV itself is inspired by Underverse and X-tale, at core !!
Rippoff is a strong word, and a wrong one at that
Similar concepts are bound to happen
Heck, there is a character with the same core concept as Stitcher, a Julie destroying worlds while thinking she does the right thing
But Designer and Stitcher are different, they have different stories, different narrative themes, and that's why both are cool as fuck (also they would likely get along if they were to meet)
I don't understand why I would want to get rid of the others
The other aus and multiverser aren't competition
They never were
The multiverse concept is not new, it's not ours, it's big and full of possibilities
That's why when our snowball effect rolled early one, with the mootieverse craze and all, we quickly detached ourselves from the word "mootieverse" so everyone could use it
Idk if people noticed that we stopped calling ourselves mootieverse
Mootieverse is for anyone that has a wh multivers characters and who is mutual with the others, and all stories are worth telling
We also try to give a little lore explanation about how we see the multiverse in wttmv, so that it doesn't exclude other creators and to avoid behavior like this
I'm putting this on full blast
This is BAD fandom behavior
It's behavior like this that makes creators want to lock themselves in their private discords to just play with their friends and never show the world their amazing creations
I don't like being seen as superior than anyone
It's uncomfortable
It makes people want to attack and blame *us* for words like this, when we never even implied anything of the sort (that happened yeah)
I rant a lot, but I think it needs to be said more
Appreciate all the stories
That's what makes us unique and not like AI
If you like wttmv, just say you like it, don't put others down, don't ask us to report (it wouldn't do anything anyway cause the others didn't do anything wrong, duh)
Scroll away if you don't like something, or mute, or block, it's as easy as this
Of you want more wttmv, idk, just ask lore questions, request doodles (me and koko are open for requests), show that you love it and maybe it'll get us motivated to show what we've been working on
Do you just understand all of this
Negativity will get your favorite AUs nowhere
It will only make them disapear
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taeyungie · 1 year
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😺
#i haven't addressed yoongi's situation yet because i'm honestly still not hit by it i guess. like it didnt gwt to me yet#i dont think ill ever love anyone the same as i love him you know what i mean#he has been the first reason of my self development. like he literally raised me??? i learned from him how to be the person i am today#and its like im saying goodbye to a family member. the thing is i have never griefed anyone's absence like this#its like a part of my soul will be missing until he comes back#but at the same time i know what he would want for me. to move on and to become my own reason#he would want me to be kind to myself. to focus on myself and not miss him that much.#he would want that for all of us right#but i have a very hard time processing things. do you guys remeber the festa last year? when we found out theyll be going on hiatus#the reality of it snd the fact that it will be happening hit me onky after around 3 months.#thats when i first cried because i realized what it meant. ofc i knew but it didnt occur to the emotional part of my brain at that time#and i feel like im truly gonna fall apart when THIS hits me in 3 months lol#my life has never been worse and thats honestly the time when i need the reassurance the most#when i need the people i love and find comfort in the most.#but its just me and thats technically just my problem. but since i am talking about my view on this then thats okay i guess hahah anyway#i just hope he knows there are milions of ppl who love him as much as i do. and thats like extra love like forever & beyond type of shit#i honestly dont think other people ever truly fully understand how we feel towards them. especially when you really love somebody#because they have their own opinions about themselves. they debate whether they deserve some kind of treatment or not. we all do that right#and i just know he does that too. i just reslly want him to feel completely loved and cherished and appreciated.#i want him to see himself through our eyes. to surround himself with people who see him exactly the way we do.#to fall in love with somebody who will see him like we see him#nobody deserves better life than this man. and i hope that after our reunion he will live that life to the fullest 💓 i can't wait to see it#anyway. if somebody needs to talk about it or wants to get sadness out of your system - im here 💓#please keep your heads up and lets wait for him 💓#we have esch other and we will be okay 💓#sorry for typos i can barely see its 1am 🤓
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mars-ipan · 30 days
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it’s weird being in recovery after like 2 months of sickness and looking forward to being able to do all the little things you used to take for granted again
#marzi speaks#i can’t wait for my feet to be healed enough for me to bounce around on them again#i’m so excited to dance and sing to myself as i go about my day#i can’t wait to have the energy to drive my car. i’m looking forward to having a license#i haven’t WANTED to drive in years. i want to drive now#(i don’t have the energy yet but that’s ok we give it time)#i can’t wait to get to go out to places again#i’m just like. stoked. to go get to do all of the being alive things again#i want to do difficult things and overcome them. i want to pick up new skills#and feel the resistance of learning and challenging myself and watching myself grow from it#it’s weird. good weird but…. weird#being in physical peril seems to have at least temporarily improved my mental health#i’m more mindful and appreciative of every little element of being alive rn#and there’s ups and downs. these steroid mood swings r wild#but like. i’m doing pretty good! i got to make my own breakfast today. and it was yummy#i got to do that again. i’m gonna shower in my shower today#with my soaps. and my music. and i can sing as shittily as i want#god singing. my voice is rusty rn i can’t wait to finish shaking that off and get my vocal range back#i’m so excited to draw again. and to work on getting a job#and to learn and grow and do all these things#i’m even like. kinda looking forward to making phone calls tomorrow! what the heck!!#i hate making phone calls! but i’m excited to have it done. and to have done it#i dunno i’m in a positive mood atm#OH RIGHT NAPTIME. god i really am just my ego babysitting my id huh
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the-acid-pear · 1 month
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see the thing that gets me about the human centipede is that you're either a normie going to watch a movie and getting scared over nothing of you're a freak whos going like WHAT'S ALL THIS THEN?! and like both can backfire bc i cannot stress enough The Human Centipede is such a stupidly tame movie there's barely any blood at all but thing is what makes me be SO insane about it it's that Heiter's actor May He Rest In Peace just put his WHOLE PUSSY into playing him making it such a fucking enjoyable and hilarious movie.
Like you cannot go watch the human centipede first sequence expecting to be scared bc you'll get bored in the first 40 minutes of doomed yuri but you gotta embrace the sheer campiness of it. Nobody cares about the campiness bro. He makes chicken sounds. He makes horrible silly chicken noises. Are you listening to me.
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charrfie · 1 year
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Appreciate u guys' patience with art related stuff sm
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mxdotpng · 2 years
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why wasnt. this in the anime
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captain-noir · 2 years
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im 90% sure that the deterioration of lestat and claudia’s relationship can be attributed to him reading her diaries. up until that point (barring charlie because i chalk that up to her trauma and his strict and tactless approach to death and not any underlying malice) he’d been keeping his distance per louis’ request. its only when he was confronted with her thoughts - inked with ungratefulness/hurtful words for both of your guardians - and her actions that led the cops to their sanctuary, was when he washed his hands off of her. and his resentment only calcified into pure hatred when louis pined for her for seven years in spite of everything
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crazysodomite · 1 year
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so fucking entitled. UUUGH.
i came here so i'm entitled to take a piece of this 'tourist attraction' as a souvenir! for me! for my house! for ME to REMEMBER that i visited it! and maybe even tell people how awesome it was! i'm entitled to it even though it will clearly ruin the whole thing in due time. but it's no fault of mine because how bad can it be! i only took a piece! SO ENTITLED. i'm entitled to pictures with the animals even if i'm clearly not supposed to interact with them. i'm entitled to tourist infrastructure even though it hurts the people who actually live there. et
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kennys-parka-jacket · 9 months
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Tbh I'm glad that sp artists dont do that "reblogs > likes" thing. I was a little worried when a few people put it on their posts a while back, but it died off pretty quickly.
#1) 'always reblog every single piece of fan art you interact with' wouldnt really work in this fandom since liking sp is considered-#-taboo on tumblr. Reblogging sp fan art requires admitting to your moots that you like sp. That's why a lot of popular sp fan art has-#-really high like to reblog ratios#2) from what i've seen most of the artists doing the 'reblogs > likes' people are fresh from twitter and mostly only care about the numbers#-tumblr is getting more traffic now than it did a few years ago; but it's still not where you want to go if reaching a lot of people-#-is all that you want#3) not too long ago i was in another fandom where begging for reblogs was common practice. Let me tell you how that turned out. -#-first it started as 'reblogs > likes' on every piece of fan art. Then it was posts going around saying that 1 to 10 reblogs to likes was-#-a pathetically sad ratio. Then it was 'always reblog because you are singlehandedly responsible for an artist's mental health'. -#-then it was putting 'please reblog; likes do NOTHING' on every fan art. Then it was begging for even more reblogs because-#-1 to 2 likes to reblogs ratio was pathetically sad. Then it was 'by not reblogging you are telling an artist to end it all' gaining-#-traction among rpf proshippers.#Look. I get it. I'm not as public about it anymore; but i'm a fan artist and fic author too. I sympathize with working hard on something-#-and wanting a lot of people to see it. But if people quiely appreciating your work is affecting you that much then maybe you need to-#-work on yourself instead of trying to control what a bunch of strangers on the internet do.#Also you need to learn how to enjoy creating without caring about the numbers. Because if you're creating just to watch-#-the numbers go up then you will never be happy. It's a miserable; joyless way to be an artist of any kind
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