#lefty's watching dynamite

[bubblegumlefty]

So about that Jeff Hardy VS Jon Moxley match... this is the state I better see Jeff in tonight once it's over. Because otherwise, what's the point?

[muriokusho]

W E I R D   H E A D C A N O N S  

WHAT THEY SMELL LIKE : Honey-warm like! It’s a comforty smell like, isn’t related to the sweets he eats and maybe it’s the smell of his washing soap, maybe it’s the smell of  his shampoo, maybe it’s the sweets he always buys in Ginza or whenever he visits Akita where they are known for their honey maybe it’s Maybelline nothing like soap or perfume although if one were to get up close they might catch a whiff of it but better be careful ;)

HOW THEY SLEEP : All over the place, big man like this needs loooooots of space (has a big bed!) and if he has a bed partner he will wrap around them like a boa and good luck getting free! He also hogs the blankets but again, if there’s a partner in bed the partner won’t get cold you’re welcome Gojo is a normal sleeper, sometimes wakes up during the night, sometimes not, but will notice his partner trying to get out of bed. Gojo is a carefree man and while he carries the weight of the world on his shoulders he sleeps his 8 hours whenever he’s not on a mission. He needs his beauty sleep!

WHAT MUSIC THEY ENJOY : George Michael, just ask Nanami! Hmmm, I always have trouble with this question? I think Gojo would be up to date with the current music that are big hits and sometimes hums along with them like Dynamite from bts he doesn’t really have a particular style kejhgsjdhg this is my one weakness for muses.

HOW MUCH TIME THEY SPEND EVERY MORNING GETTING READY : 5 minutes 30-60 minutes, this man is vain and is shameless about it, takes good care of his skin and were he not mister perfect he would get his eyebrows in shape on but alas, perfect in every way, even his eyebrows are aligned just right. He does have a night cream and applies sun screen and while he can protect humanity from curses and evil do-ers he can’t protect them from the sun!

FAVORITE THING TO COLLECT : the labels of the the various sweet/cake brands he buys from! He has a booklet that he puts them in. But also embarrassing pictures of Suguru his students whenever they gets hurt or trips or do something embarrassing/awk

LEFT OR RIGHT-HANDED : Lefty! 

FAVORITE SPORT(S) : Is watching curses run away in fear a sports? :thinking:

FAVORITE TOURISTY THING TO DO WHEN TRAVELING : Find the local specialty! Food or drink wise (except for alcohol, he doesn’t drink!) and buy enough to last him a week at home! 

FAVORITE KIND OF WEATHER : He likes the hot summer season even when it is not an opinion shared with many in Japan, esp Tokyo but it reminds him of the days of him and Suguru and Shoko and the many festivals and fireworks they watched together.

WEIRD/OBSCURE FEAR THEY HAVE : Fear? What’s that?

THE CARNIVAL/ARCADE GAME THEY ALWAYS WIN WITHOUT FAIL : He does the pew pew and the shalalala and he wins them all because losing is not an option in his book.

TAGGING : @boundvow​ @xyumeni​ @norxii​

[cerastes]

LEON "IS HANDED A WHIP AND DEADASS ASKS 'WHAT IS THIS?' BC HIS HANDS ARE RATED E FOR EVERYONE" BELMONT ALKDFJLKAJDGLKFJG. HE REALLY HAS NEVER USED A WEAPON IN HIS LIFE!!! THE SWORD WAS JUST FOR STATUS BECAUSE HE ALWAYS JUST USED HIS FLAMING DYNAMITE HEELS OF JUSTICE

You think I was having a gooferoni and cheese when I said Leon just crashed into a whole ass vampire fortress with only Lefty and Righty? When he got knighted, he was given that sword, and he just looked at it trying to figure out what the hell you could possibly use it for. Is it for long steaks? To get reception in that Wallachian TV in 1094? Leon didn’t care, he only eats Wall Meat and watches Netflix.

Leon just absolutely dispensing his Rated Y for YOU hands across the battlefields of the medieval ages.

And also, his dynamite heels? Style of life. Trevor was rocking them later, too.

Just what the hell is the Belmont Clan? Aspirations, that’s what.

[yahoo-roto-arcade-blog]

Closing Time: The last days of Dyson

This D.J. LeMahieu blast Thursday might have ended the Sam Dyson closing experiment in San Francisco (AP Photo/Eric Risberg)

Sam Dyson was already in that “own, don’t watch” bucket of sketchy closers.

And soon enough, he might be in a completely different bucket. The Giants are close enough to contention that they can’t live with this mess in the ninth inning. It could be the Last Days of Dyson.

Dyson posted his third blowup in five appearances Thursday, giving a game to the Rockies. Chris Iannetta started the rally with a single — the second time Dyson couldn’t get Iannetta out this week — and D.J. LeMahieu finished things with a mammoth no-doubt home run to left field. Goodbye, baseball. Goodbye, ballgame.

Even the one Dyson save in this recent skid was a rocky one — a white-knuckle conversion Tuesday. Dyson allowed a bloop double and a walk to Iannetta — this is the best week of Iannetta’s season, apparently — and was ultimately saved by a sharply-hit LeMahieu ball that turned into a snappy double play. Everyone exhale.

[Yahoo Fantasy Football leagues are open: Sign up now for free!]

The Giants have options, even with Hunter Strickland (busted hand) on the shelf. Tony Watson (1.73/0.96) is capable as a closer, and there are other lefties in the bullpen if he’s pulled from the rover role. Reyes Moronta (2.02/1.07) could use better control (19 walks in 35.2 innings), but he’s piling up 10.6 K/9. Mark Melancon has to pitch to contact, but he has the contract of a closer. He’s been skating by (2.61 ERA, 1.26 WHIP) since his return, 11 games ago.

Bruce Bochy is a veteran manager and generally a calm one. He’s not a man to sound alarms and push panic buttons. But Bochy isn’t going to wait forever, either. He knows the season is in the balance. Look for someone else to get a chance to run with this gig. Dyson’s chuck-and-duck style isn’t helping heart rates in San Francisco.

Watson trades at 21 percent. He’s the safest ratio pick. Moronta is just two-percent owned, and that strikeout rate sings to you. Back class has Melancon at 49 percent. He reminds me of Dyson, actually, someone who often needs to get lucky on regular contact.

Blood for saves is real. But that’s so much blood.

— Jesse Unglaub (@jesseunglaub) June 29, 2018

I like that, Jesse. Well played, player.

Place your bets. It’s post time.

Saturday Update, 1:16 AM EST: Lefty Will Smith, having a dynamite comeback season after Tommy John surgery last spring, is also in the mix. He was selected as Friday’s closer at Arizona and posted a rocking-chair inning (10 pitches, two whiffs, 1-2-3). He has to fight the lefty closing bias, but the way he’s pitching this year (mowing down everyone, 1.13/0.71), maybe that doesn’t matter. Smith is four-percent owned in Yahoo.

• Looking at the Royals lineup is like staring at the sun, but maybe Jorge Bonifacio can make things a little better. Bonifacio has been reinstated to the club, having served an 80-game PED suspension. He was ripping the ball (.392/.466/.529) during a 13-game Triple-A tuneup.

Bonifacio was an ordinary stick in his MLB debut last year — .752 OPS, 17 homers in 113 games. That type of pop would get you noticed in some seasons, but not in the Home Run Derby of 2017. Nonetheless, he’s still just 25, and the Royals don’t have anyone slugging over .467. They can use any pop they can get.

If you need to try Bonifacio, he’s available in 99 percent of Yahoo leagues. He waits for your call.

• I’m also curious if Adalberto Mondesi can get anything going with Kansas City. Kid Mondesi has ugly MLB numbers through 81 career games, but there’s a pedigree here — and he’s done some things this week. He homered in the Freddy Peralta game Tuesday — not off Peralta, though he did double off him — and has three steals in his last seven games.

Mondesi had five homers and 10 steals in just 29 Triple-A games, along with a .250/.295/.492 slash. The latter is underwhelming, but we’re always looking for category juice. Like Bonifacio, Mondesi trades at one-percent. It’s a longshot play, a dollar and a dream.

• Although I don’t expect the Athletics to trade the dazzling Blake Treinen — he’s three years from free agency — we should take note of understudy Lou Trivino, who’s doing some lawn mowing of his own. Trivino has a 1.59 ERA and 0.97 WHIP, with 39 whiffs (13 walks) over 34 innings. When Treinen needed a day off in the Detroit series, Trivino recorded a rogue save.

Trivino succeeds like so many effective relievers — straight gas, homey. His fastball sits at 97 mph. Although he doesn’t throw his change and curve much, all of his offerings are plus pitches this year. He’s not a bad pick for ratio smoothing — Oakland’s such a roomy park — and heck, maybe Oakland would move Treinen if the right words were whispered. If Carlos Pena could get moved in Moneyball, anything’s possible.

If you want to heat up with Trivino, the 26-year-old righty is available in 92 percent of Yahoo leagues.

.@Scott_Pianowski explains why it’s time to take a flyer on Jesse Winker https://t.co/Vjb8PeprRx

— Yahoo Fantasy Sports (@YahooFantasy) June 29, 2018

• With Carlos Correa (back) moving to the disabled list, you might need a middle infielder. Here are a few names to consider, speed-round style.

Ketel Marte (30 percent) isn’t running as much as expected, but he’s at .281 the last month, with five homers and 20 runs scored . . . Derek Dietrich can’t cover you at shortstop, but he plays the other three infield positions, plus outfield. He’s at .294 with 11 homers, not bad, and still kicking about in very shallow formats . . . Enrique Hernandez is a power source and another position-grabber, and he earned the Andy Behrens check mark this week . . . Charlie Culberson is one of Atlanta’s dirt dogs, with three homers, three steals, and a .303 average over the past month . . . Jose Iglesias offers little power, but he’ll hit for a solid average and steal about a base per week.

Follow the Yahoo fantasy crew on Twitter: Andy Behrens, Dalton Del Don, Brad Evans, Liz Loza, Scott Pianowski and Tank Williams

[bubblegumlefty]

Honestly, with how many heelish mannerisms Jeff was showing tonight, along with last week after his match with Darby, I could literally make an eight page essay out of it if I really wanted to. Cause this evolving heel turn dates even further back when you really dig deep into it...

[bubblegumlefty]

I have no clue why, but as I'm finishing up this week's edition of Dynamite, this guy is just manifesting in my mind like a goddamn parasite right now... pretty sure my fixation has become unhealthy at this point. 🤤

[bubblegumlefty]

Idk why, but as I was watching Matt Hardy VS Hook, this idea suddenly ran through my mind. If Jeff were to ever return to AEW someday, he should be allowed to do a complete 180 heel turn. Like imagine for a second; we can have it play out like the way Matt turned on Jeff back in the late 2000s (during the royal rumble) have Jeff make a return on either Dynamite or a payperview and let the audience think everything's all cheery and heartwarming reunions, only to have him completely blindside everyone by attacking Matt. Reason why? Jealousy, but not for the reasons you think. It's not really because of stardom or fame, but more so the fact that his older brother was actually able to successfully keep his livelyhood together despite his constant injuries in the ring. Meanwhile, with the injuries and legal problems he's faced over the past year (to the point where he's suffered a legit concussion for crying out loud!) Jeff grows increasingly hostile from everything that's happened to him and finally puts his foot down, making the decision to stop catering to the fans and stop being the risky charasmatic enigma he's been known for years. He's done being, quote on quote, "everyone's favorite rag doll." He stops using the Swanton Bomb, as he feels that the fans don't really deserve to see it anymore, thinking they only seem to really still watch him just for the crazy stunts he pulls, while not seeming to care if it causes him legit back breaking pain from performing it every single week. He does tease it from time to time, only to spite the fans by not performing the finisher. He creates a safer moveset for himself, maybe changes up his look (TNA 2010-2011 anyone?), and overall becomes more cynical and hostile to almost everybody, fans and co-workers alike. If nobody's going to take his chronic injuries seriously, then why should he continue catering to their demands each and every week? Thus, he only works part-time and only shows up on special occasions. (This way, it can kinda prevent him from causing any more accidental harm to himself in the future and give him an easier time in the ring overall.)

So basically, what we have will be a heel Jeff VS a babyface Matt, who desperately wants his little brother changed back to the smiling, kind-hearted man he's always known him for. Now you have the feud set up. 😁

Like, seriously, if we weren't able to get Jeff VS Punk, then this here is the next best thing...

I could actually make a legit story out of this... 🤔

[bubblegumlefty]

OK. So someone's gotta give me a rundown of what's happening, cause AEW had the bright idea to place this dream match as their opening match. I'm still waiting for the bus to pick me up from work so I could go home, so I have to miss it... 🙄

So on a scale of 0-10, how heelish is Jeff acting right now?

[bubblegumlefty]

Okay. I don't know what just happened, but I'm watching the battle royal for going up against MJF right now, and the moves Jeff just pulled is sending me. Those goddamn hips, I swear. He literally rolled his hips in a goddamn circle. Damn this man for being so beautiful and slutty, I swear to God. Someone needs to make a gif of that. Like, immediately. 🥵

[bubblegumlefty]

This is your lovely Jeff Hardy fangirl speaking. First up, said fangirl almost has a legit heart attack when CM Punk showed up on Dynamite right after a Hardy Boyz match-

[bubblegumlefty]

So remember what I said about giving Jeff a heel turn if he were ever able to return to AEW last wednesday? Well, Imma just add some more ways as to how I would like it to play out, cause why not? Family angst for everyone! Hooray! 🎉

Remember what I said about Jeff attacking Matt when they supposedly reunite? Well, let's say that after going through with said attack (whether it'd be a chair, kendo stick, twist of fate, what have you) Jeff decides to add salt to the wound by tossing away the iconic necklace he always wears for Matt to find whenever he comes to, leaving it behind and basically tossing away what was technically his namesake, and slowly begins to strip himself away from anything involving the Hardy name, week by week, even going so far as to be addressed as Jeffrey Nero for his ring name (not to be confused with Brother Nero obviously)

So eventually, he gets on an interview with Tony Schiavone and says something along the lines of this...

"I find it funny, really, how family, the ones who supposedly love you the most, ironically turn out to be the exact same ones who enable you the most; doesn't matter whether they're unaware of it or otherwise... at least to me."

Now, would that sting like hell? Of course it would. Is it because it's somewhat true...? Well, I'd just leave that for interpretation. 🥲

As you can see, I like to spread emotional damage. Now, usually I'm very much against using personal struggles like substance abuse and alcoholism in storylines just for some shock value, but I think if you put more emphasis on Matt desperately trying to get Jeff back and sucessfully repair the "unbreakable" brotherhood the Hardy Boyz used to be known for, rather than just putting the main focus on Jeff's personal struggles alone like a certain company does... we might actually have something special here. ✨️

So, yeah. You're welcome for listening to Part Two of what I now call these little snippets, The Heel Hardy Saga. (I might actually continue this if I get any more ideas, cause this is actually pretty fun, ngl.)

[bubblegumlefty]

So it WAS Keith Lee! Awesome! No doubt he must be feeling happier than he's ever been right now.

Keith Lee is officially All Elite! 😀😀😀

[bubblegumlefty]

HE'S HERE! HE'S HERE! HE'S HERE!

WELCOME HOME JEFFREY! 😍😍😍

[bubblegumlefty]

I didn't believe it until I saw it with my own two eyes. Welcome back, Punk. ❤😊❤

[bubblegumlefty]

I don't know why, but I'm kinda buzzy for tonight's episode of Dynamite. As in, it feels like something big's supposed to happen tonight. I dunno why. Just have that gut feeling...

[bubblegumlefty]

So... Who do you think will come from 'the forbidden door' tonight? Lots of people are saying it's Jeff, but you need to remember that his 90 day clause still hasn't run out yet. My other top guesses are Keith Lee and Karrion Kross...

Others are saying that it'll be Cody Rhodes. I'll admit, that'll probably be the best ultimate heel move ever if that happens, but that's still up in the air. Besides, isn't he still with the company? Wouldn't make much sense.

I don't know, what about you guys? What guesses do you have?