#like THAT is an effective use of the talkative monster concept bc obviously it's in disguise and impersonating another character

[fitzefitcher]

faction conflict soapbox, pt. 1

okay so it seems like for the most part, there are a couple consistent schools of thought here:

school 1: I'm tired of the Horde being the Bad Guy 24/7

school 2: I'm tired of faction conflict, in general

school 3: Really Deeply wish that the Alliance's crimes would actually be Addressed, At All

school 4: Nuanced Wild Card:tm: opinions that I'll have to tackle individually lmao

so let's get started, obviously this is going to be a long-ass post, so I'm going to preemptively break up my answers to these into separate posts, for readability and also for my own sanity lmao. this will be under my essay tag but also the tag faction conflict soapbox, for blacklisting reasons.

school 1: I'm Tired of the Horde being the Bad Guy 24/7

@lokaror: i dont tend to have much of it these days. But i hate the "Horde is always the bad guy" stuff. When faction war happens its rarely with too much nuance on either side. The group that is primarily outcasts banding together seemingly always having the bad apples chafes too. But i also see from alliance side that it can be just as raw the other way.

The alliance sprang up out of need to for mutual defense, and the horde is the horde because they also need mutual aid and defence. We can't really put too much real world ideals to either, but at its core its always a tinder that can be lit. No way around that.

@chryseis: Long time blood elf player! I still love the horde (even though most of my favourite lore characters are alliance lol) because it feels like more of a community than the alliance with their high king. However I'm getting super sick of the horde always being the bad guy, and the fact that blizz has used the same evil warchief plot twice! Having said that, some of my worst/funniest online interactions have been with men on twitter who play alliance and genuinely (1/2)

Believe that anyone who plays horde is a terrible war criminal and not someone playing a computer game lmao (2/2)

@arkhamarchitecture​:  Feels a lot like Blizzard can't resist making the Horde the villains and even when the Alliance does wrong, it gets written off and excused, like they're not allowed to be the bad guys. Which in turn makes a lot of Alliance players treat the Horde like Blizzard is biased in our favor just because the story is always about us? Even though the story is about our side apparently being full of godawful people? It's really infuriating.

I think a core issue w this is the way that the game often presents the Horde and its various characters without the same empathy that it gives to its Alliance characters (note I said "empathy" and not "nuance" or "character development," we'll get back to that later), so it's not that horde people are incapable of inspiring empathy or aren't empathetic themselves, clearly they are and have evoked that reaction enough from players to arrive at this conclusion, it's that the same sort of steps taken with portraying alliance characters aren't taken with horde characters. like, I've already covered this a bit in my sylvanas essay, but like, we're not really given any opportunity to understand what's going on inside her head, so the actions she takes feel nonsensical, unecessary, or even needlessly cruel, and seemingly as players interacting with this game we have to make a lot of extra effort in order to even attempt to understand it. like, example, the "before the storm" novel portrays her as this horrible, conniving, manipulative Evil Dictator, for not wanting to share vital information about azerite with a faction whose leader has effectively done nothing to curb the warmongering tendencies of its other leaders, when in fact, it's very understandable why she wouldn't wanna do this. But again, the author (Christie Golden, bc of course it is) very explicitly portrays her as Bad Bad Evil Zombie Lady for Daring to think that they can't trust the same faction that seems to take issue with the mere concept of the horde having the Audacity of thinking they Deserve to Live lmao. Like, clearly this is Happening, but's never talked about or formally addressed.

likewise, with Garrosh, our other Bad Bad Evil Dictator Warchief, despite all the weird, wretched, horrible shit he was doing, it unfortunately makes a really terrible kind of sense if examined further.

why did he turn away from the horde leaders? because they had all uniformly rejected him from the getgo. cairne said he'd never accept him, vol'jin said he'd kill him, sylvanas made it clear she would never respect his authority. all before he'd done a single solitary thing as warchief.

why did he turn to war so quickly and so strongly? because nothing else was working. thrall's horde had tried diplomacy for years, and it amounted to nothing, because no matter what he did, no matter how far the horde ran from the eastern kingdoms, the alliances wouldn't stop chasing them and trying to kill them. the alliance would never see them as actual people, they'd only ever see them as twisted monsters and bloodthirsty, mindless beasts.

why did he turn to such violent, inhumane methods? bc the entirety of his first real brush with warfare was in northrend, against the scourge, an enemy that will keep getting up again and again and again until they're utterly annihilated. and before that, all his experiences with conflict were with demons, who were similarly impossible to kill.

like, obviously none of these reasons make it okay for him to do what he had done. just because something is understandable, doesn't mean it's acceptable. but it's never portrayed as understandable. it's never addressed, at all. there is no nuance attached to any of his actions- it is only ever portrayed as Evil, as Manipulative and Conniving and Violent and Warmongering, even though there is a whole slew of reasons for how and why we got here. there is no emotionality, there is only cruelty.

edit: whoops, forgot a relevant ask. added now.

[ectonurites]

do u have any thoughts on the whole “tim is zapped to time prison” storyline? bc i feel like it could have been pretty interesting and a good way to bring back young justice/tim’s memories more immediately if it hadn’t been such a blatant attempt to just get tim out of storylines bc they had no ideas for his character

sorry lol u don’t have to respond i just kind of wish people talked about this storyline more? and the fact that tim lowkey became one of the only people in dc with knowledge of the other timelines (i think so at least) and nobody really addressed it?? like going into the next phase where people learn about other timelines after death metal.... tim should already know some of this stuff right?

YES YES YES OKAY LETS TALK ABOUT THIS this got incredibly long because I just have a lot to say (and i included screenshots) and i prob got a little off topic but. but lets get started anyways:

i haven’t read that particular storyline in a few months so i might be missing/misremembering some details here, but that whole ‘time prison + future tim’ thing was like. a really really interesting concept and the implications/impacts it has are a big part of why i liked tynion’s detective comics run as much as i did even with it’s flaws in characterization (such as treating tim like he was jimmy neutron boy genius and making steph..... be all ready to quit/breakaway from the team like that. the steph quitting characterization really started i think in batgirl convergence and unfortunately has haunted her since, even though pre reboot never giving up was like...... one of her defining traits. dc i hate you sometimes) 

i think that one of the biggest things that bothers me about the situation is how little we saw most of the other characters in the batfamily grieve (aside from steph and some with bruce, but again the way steph was portrayed just... hhhhhh. it very much reduced her to ‘tims girlfriend’ more than i’d have preferred) but otherwise like...as far as I can remember there was maybe one line in that monsters crossover thing where dick mentioned tim was gone, jason had a single line about avoiding the funeral in rhato, i dont think they showed any reaction from babs at all until after he was back, and the most for damian I recall is at the end of the 2014 teen titans run (#24) where he looks at... a case with the old red robin uniform Tim wasn’t even wearing anymore when he died? and that just bugs me. Instead of getting to see the actual funeral we get one flashback to it way after the fact once Bruce already knows Tim’s not actually dead

But at the time when they all DID think he was dead? the closest thing we see was in that same teen titans issue (#24) there’s a memorial-type ‘sharing stories’ thing after the funeral with tim’s titans friends but.... we don’t see something like that with his family. tim is a major presence in these peoples’ lives, they are his family, when he gets sent into time prison its even SAID how loved he apparently is

its just... idk. they all thought he was dead, and if they had put more emphasis on showing not just telling how that effected EVERYONE (not just steph) in the batfam, it might have felt a lot less like they were just putting tim away until there was a story idea for him. (like obviously I know they can’t make everyone’s stories revolve around Tim, but I’d have way preferred a detective comics issue of the funeral/memorial with the family than having there only be a teen titans one, I think it would have... held more relevance & meaning... but instead they just went right into that monster crossover story instead of lingering on this)

but then the Tim story itself once it does pick up way later, with titans tomorrow/future tim coming along having that whole “tell conner you’re sorry” “who’s conner?” exchange with current tim... that opens up A LOT of things to think about, and I think was pretty interestingly done if i’m remembering correctly. future tim recognizes the timelines are different, and ya know goes off to try to change things further ("whaddaya got there?” “a gun to kill batwoman” “NO!!!!”), theres lots of fighting etc etc the good guys win as we expect, but once that’s all settled tim’s left there with this whole. thought process

which ya know is the big indicator there’s weird timeline/reality fuckery going on (or also the read here can be that tim and kon are so connected across all space and time that their bond can transcend anything even timelines and realities and reboots... “and they were soulmates” “oh my god they were soulmates”) 

ANYWAYS lets not forget that tim isnt the only one who learns about this other timeline stuff during this whole situation!

Brother Eye has records of future tim’s timeline, and cass & steph see who they used to be! and as soon as steph finds out ‘holy shit i was ROBIN and BATGIRL?’ she also desperately wants to know more! which then a bit later leads into young justice 2019 where instead of going off to college like they told Bruce they were gonna, Steph and Tim go get the help of Zatanna to see what might be going on in their brains with these timelines and weird feelings (as we see in flashback form in yj 2019 #5)

and HOO BOY DOES SHE FIND THINGS! she gets in there and finds out that oh yeah, their brains had very much so been tampered with, and with her magic she undoes some of it, by unlocking memories, and Tim finally remembers Conner! (also in case u were wondering, that panel is specifically a callback to this one from yj 1998 #17 when Cissie quit the team)

one thing that I think is weird/interesting/idk if it gets... properly addressed even, was that Zatanna also poked around Steph’s brain too and she didn’t remember everything? Might have something to do even with how Tim had been in time prison, might have taken less work from Z to open things up because of that? Who knows

additionally i wanna call attention to how he said “That entire chapter of my life” which... leading into my next point a bit... strongly leads me to believe even though he’s remembering some things he definitely does not have ALL of his memories back (because theres a lot more than just the young justice ‘chapter’ of tim’s life that was drastically changed by the new 52 & rebirth) 

BUT moving on, i wanna bring up this part from later on (after they figured out that there was a crisis that caused things in the world to change, which is why their memories/brains were messed with) in issue #16

so yeah, I think it’s indicated even though Zatanna brought back some memories and opened up his brain a bit, there’s still many holes, and some things seem more like dreams rather than memories and he’s probably unable to tell which are which on his own to some extent. (also for reference the real thing that Tim thought was just a dream is... likely yj 1998 issue #1)

So based on the things i’ve brought up here (which are the things I remember off the top of my head, I could easily be accidentally leaving shit out LMAO i haven’t fully read through any of these books in at least 3 or more months now) I think it’s safe to assume that Tim definitely has a head start on getting back his memories before Death Metal happens, but that it was by no means a complete thing. So the after effects of Death Metal are probably just gonna... be a little less drastic for him vs most other people because it was already happening, but it’ll be kinda filling in the remaining gaps? 

And like you said he is absolutely one of the few people that already knew about about the timelines/the fact that these crises have happened and changed things, but pretty much all the other young justice characters are also aware that there was meddling in the timeline/that multiple timelines and alternate universes like this exist since they were all together as a group when it got explained (in like. yj 2019 #15 i believe is where most of the explaining happens) (and cass as well is aware of things to some extent because of her and steph’s interaction with Brother Eye) but the difference is that Zatanna didn’t go into everyone’s brains, so they aren’t dealing with the same memory things as Tim (and possibly Steph? because again Z DID go in her brain, she just wasn’t able to unlock all the same things as she did with Tim) 

but yeah in general i SO wish this was explored more, both in canon and in fanworks (fanworks tho... that can still happen >:3c). Memories hazily coming in for Tim while Kon and Bart are able to confirm or deny things, him dealing with conflicting memories and feelings about his past as they trickle in... like I think we’ll start to see these types of things moving forward across a lot of titles with Infinite Frontier (i BELIEVE dont quote me on this but I BELIEVE the person writing Damian’s upcoming solo had mentioned in an interview that the memories coming back of the other timeline aren’t going to be an all at once thing but will be more gradual for most characters) but the fact that it theoretically had already been happening for Tim for MONTHS and we only got that one crumb indicating it in #16 of it instead of any actual exploration makes me SAAAAAAD 

[inknose]

mdzs read diary part IV, the end

It’s inspiring how much self care wwx is gonna finally get now that his husband will go along with whatever he does, so he’s gotta look out for lwj’s well being if not his own. that is emphatically the STUFF

dragging my hands down I face as I read this, after all these chapters of getting up close and personal with ghouls bleeding from every orifice, slaying ancient beasts, rebelling against the entire cultivation world, the two of them are absolutely paralyzed by middle school crush sleepover math

chicken

he actually drew kissy doodles .... he....

IDK I THINK I JUST DOCUMENTED THIS PART CUZ I WAS STILL SCREAMING you cant expect me to have very useful things to say at this point

this is torture you are both so mushy you are so GONE

This part really stood out to me, it’s an attitude I feel like wwx implies with his inner narration a few times but most clearly says here: he’s not one for allowing himself to exaggerate how bad his circumstances are/could be even a little bit - he’s already lived through some extreme low points and found a way to keep going, so he never makes sweeping statements about what he couldn’t live without (Inner JingYi: you’re supposed to say you’d be lost without him here!!!) Instead he seems to accept as a given that being alive doesn’t guarantee him any pleasantness or joy at all, and as a result his feelings toward being in TRUE LOVE are surprisingly pragmatic, but also colored with such gratitude. There are a lot of things in the novel that struck me, like this, as being just a little to the left of familiar tropes/sentiments, and were more touching for it. Whether it be the influence of culture difference as opposed to what I’m used to reading in most western romance stories, or MXTX’s unique outlook, or a combination of both, it was really refreshing and made me pause over it. Not “I can’t imagine living without you” but “I could be living without you, but instead I get to be with you and I think that’s the best thing that could happen.”

ADJFDKFJ THE UST BEING SO STRONG THAT EVEN THE VILLAIN COMMENTS ON IT IN THE MIDDLE OF EXECUTING HIS EVIL PLANS IS ONE OF THOSE THINGS THAT WILL NEVER FAIL TO MAKE ME LAUGH MY ASS OFF. hes like god damn! here I thought I had problems

it was at this moment that I realized we were doing this Now... I’m still recovering. What a scene. I am so glad I saw the most incredible fanart soon afterwards, bc the fact that someone has already drawn a perfect comic of this part means I don’t have to

I love you so much, you are so annoying, you are perfect... I like how he’s been experiencing openly requited love for all of ten minutes but he’s already figured out how to weaponize it to piss people off

doing!!! his!!! job!!!!!

ahh... it’s a really good story. JGY is a great character. One of the most interesting differences for me between drama watching vs. novel reading experience is that without an actor to bat his vulnerable doe eyes at you and smile faintly with his cute dimples, the book does not go much out of its way to try to lull the reader into a false sense of security around him or *endear* him to you the way the show does. But just by seeing events through wei wuxian’s POV, its still enough to evoke pity or understanding towards him. The overall impression is a bit more detached though, there’s less emphasis on the spectacle of how he could manipulate everyone closest to him and more of a general feeling of resigned tragedy that everyones the worst on this bitch of an earth.

I CANNOT DEAL WITH YOU FOR EVEN ONE MORE SECOND!!!!

I clearly paused to take note of less and less parts at the end & the extras due to: a) too excited to reach the end b) too spicy to photograph and c) too sleepy cuz I kept reading in the middle of the night. but I absolutely took the time for Bro We Are Teens appreciation corner:

I’d absolutely read 40 more extra chapters of their monster-of-the-week field trip antics.

god... poor Jin Ling now basically has to deal with divorced parents that talk shit about each other to him whenever he is saying with one of them. except they are both his uncles. just a disasterhood of all uncles from start to finish. AUUUGH wei wuxian and jiang cheng have fucked me up completely, I dream of them reconciling but I also REFUSE to believe it would ever be easy. let me know if theres a fanfic that absolutely tortures you for decades before they hug

HAHAHA oh no this man ain’t making it to immortality thats for damn sure. HE’S JUST GONNA TRY AS HARD AS HE CAN HIS WHOLE LIFE NOT TO LOOK AT HIM BUT THEYRE *MARRIED* SDLKFJSF ohhhh it’s too funny, like... the mundane domestic family drama IN the fantastical swords and sorcery setting is what really ratchets up these things from amusing to fucking hilarious I think

aaaa the end... final random thoughts? No not final, I would like to please keep discussing at length and exhaustively, all the time please - CQL has gotta be one of the best TV adaptations I’ve seen. ANY adaptation of anything would be lucky to be so good!! reading the novel has just made me appreciate it even more.

- I don’t think I can do justice to what I find most fascinating about comparing the two versions briefly, to do that I need to get drunk and ramble at my friends for hours but... the condensed version is something like this. Really all the significant differences between the two versions (besides the ones which can be attributed to censorship and therefore aren’t worth discussing) are a side effect of the structure of how the story is told - there’s barely anything changed arbitrarily. Aside from having a cold opening, the drama sticks to a very linear version of the story, and I think for a TV show or film, that’s probably the best way to do it. We see everything, we get shocked and tricked and betrayed and surprised along with the characters, we feel the biggest impact at the climactic scenes having experienced all the build-up. The novel on the other hand is not only much more non-linear in WHEN we learn bits and pieces of information, but that information is also obfuscated under wei wuxian’s multiple layers of Unreliable Narratoritis, which are as follows: 1) difficulty remembering things because of personality/avoiding painful memories/actual memory loss, 2) No Homo Goggles still on, and 3) a wry sense of humor that makes the reader unsure of how much they can trust his attitude toward things, especially near the beginning. The experience of reading is a puzzle the reader has to mentally piece together through all of the above listed camouflage, and the puzzle itself is a three-sided mystery: One - How Bad of a guy was Wei WuXian really, and how exactly did all the bad stuff in his life go down; Two - wangxian epic pride & prejudice gambits; Three - political murder mystery. (I love stories like this btw... though I fully admit I’m glad I watched first this time bc it might have taken me a long time to tackle otherwise.) Because of this, where the drama wants to pull you in and submerge you in all the most potent emotional parts, the novel in direct contrast deliberately side-steps around these things and asks that you hurt yourself by filling in the blanks. In fact the more intense emotions and painful memories involved, whether it be his relationship with jiang yanli, his DEATH, the darkest days of war times etc, the more the novel evasively withholds details. I actually really like both styles of storytelling but each one is obviously way better suited to its medium. ANYWAY.... THATS BASICALLY WHERE MY BRAINS AT WHILE IM READING GAY SWORD WIZARD BOOKS

- The extras are so saturated with domestic married bliss that it’s a good thing I stopped taking pictures because I’d just take a picture of every page. this is too much for me to take... I did jump the gun a few times and read a few fanfics while I was still mid-read of the book (I tried to hold out but alas I am mortal) and at one point after finishing I was like “wow what fic was it in where lwj says something cute and wwx kisses him in public but they’re in the corner of the restaurant so no one really sees... OH NO WAIT that was actually in there.” and ... and that’s the LEAST OF IT... *stares into the distance* theyre married wow

- I ofc couldn’t help but see a few vague blogs beforehand so honestly I was braced for something like, wildly ooc for the sake of porn to happen in the extras... I definitely appreciate how the incense burner porn interludes could be uhhh a lot for many people and not my personal cup of tea in terms of smut however [here follows the words of a poisonous frog who has dwelt her whole life in the rainforests of BL] the concept is also surprisingly SWEET SDFLKJF like wwx sees lan wangji’s darkest mixed-up violent teenage fantasies and he’s just like aww babe you had a crush on me!! just... good for them

- I swear I’m not gonna rehash every cute married thing they do but wei wuxian grading papers in the tub........................rEALLY GOT ME

- I want to Draw - ok thats enough if I keep going I’ll just write “wei wuxian grading papers in the tub” seven more times probably

[anerdyfeminist]

Health related stuff to follow, don’t read if periods/surgery stuff is hard for you. But if this is something you’re cool reading...what I’m going to say in a LOT more words is that it’s really, really fucked up how hard it is to get help with menstruation/uterus related medical care that actually WORKS and/or to be listened to or respected about those issues.

I keep thinking about how so many things have happened with my health in the past year that I haven’t even had time to mentally or emotionally process it and by the time that I could get a moment to try..............boom, pandemic. I can’t remember how much I’ve written here about it generally...BUT trying to summarize quickly, after the bad car accident that fucked up my arm and I had surgery to fix it, the MRI scans they took at the ER that night opened a god damn Pandora’s box of shit in there I needed to take care of. I went from understanding myself as a person who has one mild chronic health issue to..........someone with four.

The biggest issue that was discovered was a wide spread and a really advanced case of endometriosis. My gyno surgically removed multiple endometriomas from both of my ovaries, the largest of which was bigger than a grapefruit. After I recovered from surgery, I started taking the only medication that specifically exists to inhibit more endometrial growth and manage the pain. (And it’s a pretty new drug at that.) My doctor didn’t really fully consider that one of its biggest side effects is depression and anxiety and as someone whose mental health has only rather recently gotten in a better place, after a couple of months on this new medication, I felt like how I felt before I started taking anti anxiety meds. That was suuuuuper untenable and I couldn’t stay on it.

So I had to go back to square one on how to keep my endo at bay. But this time in the story of “how the fuck to treat this raging case of endo” we’re now into late March and in the pandemic when I get to the point where my doctor explains that pretty much the only other option for me is to try an IUD. Hearing that pretty much made me almost breakdown crying in the appointment. (I held it together long enough to get home for that.)

I’ve always loved that IUDs exist for people who want them, bc I’m obvi all about access to the birth control anyone wants and I have lots of friends who LOVE theirs and extol their virtues. But literally ever since the moment I learned about then when I was like 17 I have been super averse to the concept for myself. I had long ago filed IUDs under “NOPE” in my brain. I’m just one of those folks who is grossed out by the idea of foreign material just existing inside my body. But after going through having already had a bunch of hardware in my arm and knowing how shitty it felt trying the endo meds, I said FUCK IT and took the plunge to get an IUD.

(Side note: seeking this type of medical care in the middle of the pandemic was super creepy dystopian and like being in a fucking episode of A Handmaid’s Tale because I was usually the only person there who was not VERY visibly pregnant because only totally “medically necessary” procedures were allowed, all the masks, plastic partitions, spacing of patients, etc., etc. Just weird.)

The IUD insertion itself was a nightmare if I’m really honest and the ultrasound they did at that point disappointedly revealed ANOTHER endometrioma already growing back that my doc wants to now keep an eye on........BUT the good news is that bad insertion experience aside, so far I’m feeling pretty good about using it. It’s been almost 3 months with it and the biggest revelation by far has been that the terrible, monster periods I had FOR YEARS just didn’t need to be what they were. In such a short span of time having much much much lighter ones, I’ve already begun to wonder what I was thinking just trying to suffer through that experience for so long.

If you’ve read my stuff here over the past few years, you’ll know that my period was the most raging heavy and intense.......I mean, I have a whole fucking tag for it. I had to go out of my way to find the largest capacity menstrual cup IN THE LITERAL WORLD and I would fill it a few times a day. You’d hear me say “oh hey, FYI your periods can get much heavier the older you get” which is true, mind you, but I had no idea that what I was experiencing was really really well beyond the bounds of what is “normal” and indicative of a bigger health issue. I told my doctor (who I don’t really fault, she has a lot of good qualities) about it and she thought it was just normal aging stuff. I didn’t advocate for myself as much as I should have and she didn’t listen to me well enough as she should have and the result is that for about 5 years I had untreated and undiagnosed endo that resulted in that grapefruit sized endometrioma and all her friends.

There were other signs too...my cramps had gotten incredibly horrific. Once the endometriomas were all removed, I realized they had been doing stuff like pressing on my bladder, making it hard to pee/empty it all the way and I couldn’t lay in bed in certain ways pain free. Getting this diagnosis was scary but it all started to make sense. And it’s still making sense the more I unravel my understanding of the past several years of my life. What I was going through was not normal, but it also wasn’t being taken seriously by anyone, perhaps most of all, by myself.

So yeah, I’m still processing this news and seeking to better understand that I didn’t have to feel like that for so long. I’ve got this tendency baked into me to assume and accept that “life is suffering” (thanks, dad) and that you must grin and bear it and just survive. I think that when it comes to issues that involve menstruation or uterine issues, that this message is even LOUDER because we are shamed into not speaking about these things publicly by society more widely. Their discussion is stigmatized, belittled, glossed over, filed under “ewwwww grossssss” etc.

But obviously, that’s not how it has to be................if I am hurting or uncomfortable I am WORTH the effort of trying to figure out why and see if I can fix it. And if that issue involves my period or uterus or ovaries SO BE IT. There’s nothing inherently gross or TMI about that. They are body parts and they get conditions. That’s life.

Anyway, I really enjoyed Padma Lakshmi’s interview by Terry Gross on Fresh Air this week and it influenced me wanting to write this. She talks about her own endo story and it really resonated with me. (She also had a terrible arm injury in her past. We’re basically twins LOLOLOL.) As I said, I’m still processing ALL of this. But if there’s one thing I know for sure, it is that having endometriosis sucks but knowing you have it is waaaaaaaaay better than not knowing.

[firebirdsdaughter]

Waaaaaah!...

... And now, on to the gift that was Zi-O 23!

Spoilers below.

In no order:

I DON’T CARE KURO WOZ.

The only valid Wozes are Woz.5 and Keisuke himself. Those are the only valid Wozes.

... So they’re seriously trying to tell me baby Sougo could write clearly in grammatically correct English of all things. I doubt he could even do that now. Someone show this to Sougo to check if he wrote it.

Also, the first time I watched this and that shot revealed Geiz was still living at the shop, I WAS ON CLOUD NINE. I KNEW WHAT IT MEANT.

Okay, so I’d need a proper translation to decide if the dialogue here is supposed to be implying Sougo’s using his new future sight powers to cheat on a test. Given that when he mucks it up (boy gets a fourteen), he studies instead of trying to do that, I would believe not, but I can’t get a clear enough online translation to tell.

And we all know he’s bad at math.

The fact that he’s not only bad at it, it apparently just straight up knocks him out is also bloody hilarious.

Kikaider’s suit is goofy, but I do like his Henshin.

Geiz calls him. Geiz freaking calls him to come fight the Another Rider. Like everything is normal. I’m so grateful to most of this episode for my life, honestly.

Then they’re confused about there not being a person. But Sougo is just like ‘I gotta go study!’

Time Jacket kids are getting uneasy. This is totally justified given that later in the episode we clearly establish that dad has lost the plot--actually, he probably lost it a long time ago.

Sougo, why does math put you to sleep so fast, you might want to check that out.

The funny whirring sound every time Kikaider moves...

He’s cute, though, I like his smile.

The fact that if I did not know already I don’t think I’d believe this is the same actor who played Zamigo is a testament to this guys skills, I think. He’s like... Sweet baby-face boy here. It’s kind of fascinating.

... Ice powers? Why does he have ice powers? Eh, whatever.

Geiz looks a little uncomfortable w/ this being another future Rider...

GEIZ LECTURE HIM ABOUT SLEEPING WHILE HE’S SUPPOSED TO BE STUDYING.

This is so adorable. Came here to assassinate him, now here you are caring about his test scores. Yeah. You’re not getting fond of him all.

That tiny wave Shiro Woz does does not fit the Drama Chord that happens in the soundtrack when he and Tsukuyomi show up. I mean it when I say the only good things about Shiro and Kuro Woz are Keisuke. The actor is adorable and I love him. Strongly dislike both characters, though.

Not you, Woz.5, you’re an angel and I’m thrilled you were here.

Oh, hey. I just noticed that Tsukuyomi put her ‘future dress’ back on.

Let us mark to day at the first day the online translator actually properly translated Woz’s name.

Meanwhile, Geiz is genuinely shocked that she’s w/ Shiro Woz. I guess he didn’t think she was actually serious about turning on Sougo.

She’s like ‘how can you stay w/ Sougo?’ Unfortunately, Shiro Woz doesn’t give him a chance to even try and answer. He probably would have panicked about feelings anyway. Though maybe he would have admitted to having them, who knows.

... What was w/ the dramatic sound effect and zoom in? I mean, I like Keisuke’s face well enough, but... Why?

I just realise Tsukuyomi is paired off w/ a Woz again. Like, when Another Shinobi was there, she ended up hanging out w/ Kuro Woz, and now she’s hanging out w/ Shiro Woz. I guess this explains why the actors were kind of like that too.

I know Tsukuyomi’s doing a dramatic speech bout having to kill Sougo, but I am distracted by the hilarious facial expressions Keisuke is making in this scene.

Sorry, Tsukuyomi, but Geiz doesn’t actually want to do that anymore. And honestly, whose fault is that?

I love his reaction. Like, he’s clearly having ‘feelings panic’ but he does not look happy at the concept and is genuinely confused by her sudden shift in opinion. Like he doesn’t say it, and honestly, it’d sound kinda whiny if he did, but that look just totally read ‘But I don’t want to!?’ to me.

And then he still goes back to the shop. And he and Sougo proceed to have one of their usual, totally whacky interactions.

Aka, Geiz has no chill and is unnecessarily aggressive about everything.

Also, Sougo is chugging something that looks like five hour energies and that cannot be healthy.

Though the extra aggression might also be compensating for uncertainty w/ everything else.

Like, he seems pretty shaken by Tsukuyomi’s switch. I’m not sure what that flashback was supposed to indicate, but it made him stand down from bullying Sougo... Like, being hyper aggressive (as usual, admittedly) reminded him of her saying they had to defeat Sougo, and he backed off bc he didn’t want to think about that/deal w/ the association? Probably over analysing and making no sense, aren’t I?

Aaaaand... He’s down.

Poor Geiz. He was trying to have a genuine, open conversation, and Sougo just conks out.

No! Baby-face boy!

Tsukuyomi runs up the stairs, but Shiro Woz can’t be bothered. His legs are too long.

Geiz is working out his frustrations and concerns by punching the Another Rider. A valid outlet.

Tsukuyomi, maybe don’t do this while he’s working.

Geiz is just like ‘whatever, as long as you’re attacking the Another Rider.’

Why are you saying Geiz’s name like that? He’s the one who’s been still at the shop all day, dude. 

Then Geiz just asks if Sougo learned anything from his dream. Literally there is nothing in this ending that makes me at all think Geiz was going w/ Tsukuyomi and Shiro Woz at the end. Kuro Woz can go off.

Okay, but what is that thing and WHERE DID IT COME FROM? I just assumed it was Sworz, but I guess it wasn’t? So... Who made this beetle thing? Why does it create Another Kikaider?

Sworz, the one person who never makes any effort to differentiate between he Wozes.

Sougo freaking tries to warn Heure. Yeah, Tsukuyomi, he’s obviously decided to become Puma Zi-O. Bc Puma Zi-O would totally try to save a Time Jacket.

Also:

God freaking damn it to hell! Sworz, I liked you!

Geiz is genuinely shocked at this. Like, there is literally nothing here indicating to me that he would actually follow Shiro Woz here, I’m not sure why they tried to imply that.

*continues grumbling bc I liked Sworz*

Of course, when I say ‘like’ I mean, like, in regards to liking evil characters. Not that I think he’s a good person and I want to be his friend.

After this I really don’t want to be his friend. The desire has gone into the negative.

Pretty sure Ora is going to be very slowly backing towards the door after seeing this. (also established by the next ep preview)

Something that also has occurred to me on this rewatch... What just happened here was Sworz forcing Heure to use/be used by/take what could be construed as a ‘power up’--which promptly causes him to lose control. ... Are they trying to foreshadow something here...? (I would actually love it if this were foreshadowing for what I want it to be foreshadowing for)

Oh, go off as well, Shiro Woz. Jerkface.

WAGA KYUURANGERS.

... I think that’s the first time he’s said that this ep.

Oh... I also just noticed Geiz looks at Tsukuyomi to see what she’s going to do...

I... Really don’t understand why they’re trying to claim Sougo’s on his own now? There was... Literally nothing to indicate that Geiz wanted to follow Shiro Woz or believed him at all? There was also nothing n this ending that seemed like it would prompt him to? So I’m just gonna say that until proven otherwise, he just decided to head back to the shop on his own to think. Maybe we can have a scene where Sougo gets back and is like ‘wait, you’re here?’ and Geiz is like ‘I’m sorry, you thought I was gonna follow that arsehole?’

Plus, like, the preview shows all three current Riders transforming together? Plus it’s talking about everyone working together. Even Ora’s getting in on the teaming together.

Which is quite sensible of her. I feel like there’s often times when a character in her position would be like ‘nah, I’m fine on my own’ or something, but Ora’s just like ‘yeah, nope. Not taking any chances.’

I know the ‘best friend’ title isn’t referring to my boys, but I can close my eyes pretend it is.

And the angst monster in my closet and I are both hoping that really was foreshadowing of what’s gonna happen w/ Geiz Revive in some way...

Also, I’m gonna make everyone look at this image again bc the visual cues in it are so important to me okay?

Like, yes, clearly Tsukuyomi’s still being ridiculous, but it’s set up like an ‘all sides meeting’ sort of scene and Geiz is standing next to Sougo:

That’s all, folks! Digital sesame red bean paste buns for anyone who read all that.

I am so glad they had Geiz stay w/ Sougo. I know a lot of people were assuming he was of Tsukuyomi’s mind, bc... I don’t know. I guess he never outright disagreed w/ her. But he’s still treating Sougo the same? Ish? Actually, he even seemed friendlier at points? Like he’s worried about him studying and actually tried to have a serious conversation w/ him? And he seemed genuinely bothered by Tsukuyomi’s decision? And I love this? And bc I love angst, I’ll love it even more if that was foreshadowing and that’s what happens later w/ however the Revive power up works? So long as we all come out of it okay. I’m still hoping this ‘fated battle’ never actually happens, or, at least, happens differently than is actually being presented.

Okay, okay. I think everyone gets the point.

[audaciousanonj]

Summer Nights and Starlight

Kicking off the 30 days of Monster Summer Mash with Papyrus taking his brother to gaze at stars! (Plus a cameo from @thunderstruck-edgelord‘s Reader bc Self Indulgence)

[AO3]

Papyrus had decided, long before he had ever wanted to be a royal guard, not to focus on the stars.

Obviously, he never would have told that to Sans! His brother had loved hearing about the stars, and used to go on and on about how he would be an astronaut one day. (Papyrus made a mental note to introduce the various thaumic sciences to NASA, and maybe wonder if they would accept monsters on the ISS. Perhaps they could start off slow, with, say… a skeleton monster who liked physics and applied thaumology?) However, Papyrus had never seen the appeal. If anything, he had been interested in geology! Why would he focus on a sky he might not ever have seen, when there were all those pretty rocks in waterfall that sparkled when his magic shone against them?

Of course, that had been before Frisk had came and the barrier had broken. Now they were all on the surface! Now Papyrus could see the sky! Rainbows! Sunrises and sunsets! Moon cycles and solar eclipses and…

And he still didn’t get what was so interesting about stars!!! The sky changed colors in the morning and evening; what was so fascinating about a few specks of white in the dark of night? Papyrus had confided his lack of interest to Flowey, who had asked Asgore what was so great about the stars that all the other monsters loved them. Asgore had then talked to Flowey and Frisk about the good old days when the skies were so full of stars you could make out galaxies, and Frisk had responded by introducing everyone to the concept of “light pollution.”

Which led to today, with Papyrus borrowing Asgore’s truck to drive a snoozing Sans and a bed full of camping supplies out into the desert.

Alphys and Undyne had gone out stargazing last week, and according to Undyne it was “the best thing ever, you HAVE to try it! Even Alphys thought it was cool, and she’s a huge shut-in! We could have watched the stars all night, if we hadn’t-” Undyne had stopped abruptly then, telling Papyrus more than he wanted to know, before quickly changing the subject. “Anyways, you said your brother was a HUGE NERD about space, why not go stargazing together?”

Papyrus still hadn’t been convinced that the hype was worth it, but the thought of the look on Sans’ face as he saw the stars had finally convinced him. This would be the perfect way to rekindle his brother’s passions..!

...Or shatter them forever. Sans had always been so hyped about the idea of stars, flaming balls of gas from so far away and yet so beautiful; how could reality possibly live up to the ideal? Papyrus was no stranger to realities falling short of paradise, what with having to navigate and predict the scuffles between human and monster culture as a part of his job. Sometimes it was better to let your dreams be dreams! If he brought Sans out here to stargaze only to see his brother’s face fall as he realized that stars really weren’t that great, then...

Then…

Papyrus abruptly realized he wasn’t paying attention to the road, and pulled over. Not paying attention while driving was bad news! And usually ended up on the news too! And it was almost sunset anyways, so it was probably a good idea to go deeper into the desert and away from the highway; that is, once his bones would cooperate and stop rattling so much!!!

“oh hey, we’ve stopped. are we- bro?”

Papyrus yelped in surprise as his brother’s voice came from the backseat. “EVERYTHING IS EXTREMELY FINE, NO PROBLEMS HERE!!!”

“bro.”

Papyrus refused to look in the rearview mirror. If he didn’t acknowledge the look on his brother’s face, then he didn’t have to answer the implied question! “NO, WE ARE NOT THERE YET, I AM SIMPLY TAKING A LITTLE… PAUSE BEFORE I CONTINUE. NOW HUSH, I NEED TO CONCENTRATE.” With the topic sufficiently avoided, Papyrus shifted gears and drove off the highway completely, and onto the dry desert terrain.

Sans stared in surprise as the truck headed further away from the highway. “uh... bro? the road is the other way.”

“I KNOW WHICH WAY THE ROAD IS, SANS. NOW HUSH. ”

Sans managed to keep silent for about seven minutes before finally giving in to the inevitable. “so, we’re just gonna keep trucking ahead, are we?”

“SANS IF I HEAR ONE MORE WORD OUT OF YOU I SWEAR I WILL TURN THIS CAR AROUND,” Papyrus gritted out, but a part of him relaxed. Sans wouldn’t be able to resist such an obvious opening, and that would give Papyrus the excuse he needed to cancel this whole excursion! It’s not like either of them would be missing much, it was just stars!

Sans, naturally, took the bait. “one more word-”

Papyrus started turning.

“wha- hey, wait bro, i was just kidding!”

“TOO LATE, SANS. I GAVE YOU YOUR CHANCE BUT YOU THREW IT AWAY.” Still, Papyrus hesitated. Sans did seem eager to continue the “SURPRISE BROTHERLY OUTING” Papyrus had planned...

“it was just a joke! come on, i’ll be silent the rest of the trip, i promise!”

Papyrus slammed the brakes.

“gah!”

Sans didn’t make promises.

(“uh, bro..?”)

Sans didn’t make promises. Not casually.

(“what’s rattling your bones?”)

Sans didn’t make promises except for things that were important to him which meant this trip was important to him (“paps?”) even though he didn’t even know what they were going to do but he still really wanted to do this and Papyrus was going to cancel something that Sans really (“Papyrus?”) hoped for but if he kept going it would destroy his (“Papyrus. Talk to me.”) dreams and how can he make that choice how can he decide between Sans’ hopes or dreams or hopes or dreams or-

“Papyrus. Hey. Look at me.”

Papyrus blinked in surprise, and let out a sudden sob as his body informed him that he had been hyperventilating.

“you stopped the car, that’s good. lets you ride out something else,” Sans said soothingly from the front seat, having relocated himself while Papyrus was… busy.

“TH-THAT PUN WA-AS AWF-F-FUL.” Papyrus choked out.

“yeah, but it’s calming you down, isn’t it?”

“IT IS AND I HA-HATE IT!” Papyrus let out another hitching breath, and leaned against the steering wheel. He didn’t really hate it, but it had become something of a running joke between the brothers and Papyrus was too exhausted to try and come up with a different response.

“just keep breathing, bro, you’re doing fine,” Sans continued. Papyrus didn’t often break down, but when he did he usually broke down hard, so Sans had experience in comforting Papyrus. He still wasn’t sure if it was more or less experience than he’d like. On one hand, he hated when Papyrus broke down like this, but on the other hand, maybe if Sans could help him more before it became too much, Papyrus would break down less. “ya want me to pet your skull?”

“UH-HUH,” Papyrus mumbled into the steering wheel, closing his eyes as Sans made good on his offer. They stayed like that for a couple minutes, silent except for Papyrus’ slowly evening breaths and the scratches of bone on bone.

“hey, papyrus…” Sans hesitantly broke the silence, “do you want to tell me what’s wrong?”

Papyrus stiffened. He really didn’t. He really, really didn’t. The mere thought of destroying his brother’s passions in such a way had sent him spiraling into a panic attack, of course he couldn’t tell Sans what’s wrong! Even if the thought of sharing his burdens with his brother sent a desperate ache in his soul, his brother had his own problems to deal with! So really, why would he ever say “I-WAS-GOING-TO-TAKE-YOU-STARGAZING-BUT-STARS-ARE-SO-OVERHYPED-WHAT-IF-YOU-REALIZED-THAT-AND-NEVER-GOT-PASSIONATE-ABOUT-ANYTHING-AGAIN-!”

Papyrus slammed his hand over his mouth.

“oh.” Sans paused, going over what his brother just said. “is this your ‘everything has to be perfect’ thing?”

“NNN…”

“because, you know it doesn’t matter that much to me, right? yeah, stargazing sounds super cool, and you’re the coolest for taking me out here to do it, but it’s not going to be ruined if there’s, i dunno, clouds or anything. just getting to spend some time as a family makes the trip worth it.”

“BUT- BUT WHAT IF IT’S NOT CLOUDS?” Papyrus asked, “WHAT IF THE STARS THEMSELVES AREN’T ACTUALLY THAT INTERESTING TO GAZE AT?”

“easy. i’ll shoot off some stellar puns, eat an entire bag of marshmallows, and fall asleep.”

“SANS! WE DON’T EVEN HAVE MARSHMALLOWS!”

Sans just grinned. “so, does this mean we’re gonna continue?”

Papyrus smiled. “YES, WE ARE. I DO NEED TO CONCENTRATE, THOUGH, SINCE WE AREN’T ON THE ROAD.”

“alright. you won’t hear another peep out of me.”

“THANK YOU- SANS! NO MORE PUNS!”

“come on bro, don’t be so mallowdramatic.”

“SANS!!!!”

Once Papyrus found a good camping site that was sufficiently away from the road, he set up the tent, and then he and Sans had dinner. If Papyrus was by himself, he would have continued sitting outside to watch the sky change colors, but Sans had convinced him to wait inside the tent until the sun was fully down so that when they went outside they could get the full effect of the sky all at once.

Papyrus had gone along with Sans’ idea. This trip was for his benefit, after all.

“so she’s just eating the jar of mayo- like, just eating it straight out of the jar- when all of a sudden she asks me if i’ve ever felt like there’s something that was supposed to happen, but didn’t,” Sans continued, halfway through telling a story about a human he met at Grillby’s. “so i pick myself up off the floor, because philosophy is my jam, and go ‘yeah?’ and she’s like ‘once, i was walking home during this huge thunderstorm, when out of nowhere i got the urge to check some nearby dumpsters. there wasn’t even anything there, but i could have sworn that i would have found someone hiding! weird, right?’ and i was like ‘yeah that’s weird,’ and she said ‘wouldn’t it be super cool if somewhere there was a world where i met my best friend by those dumpsters?’ and then we talked about chaos and multiverse theories for a while.”

“HOW INTERESTING! SOUNDS LIKE YOU MADE A NEW FRIEND, BROTHER!”

“eh, maybe,” Sans shrugged. “hey, it’s pretty dark out there. think it’s finally time to go stargazing?”

Papyrus stiffened a bit, before forcing himself to relax. “IF YOU SAY SO!”

“alright then. close our eyes, and step outside on the count of three?”

“THAT SOUNDS LIKE A PLA-”

“wait, hang on...”

Papyrus paused, and turned to look back at Sans, who looked more excited than usual. “YES?”

“wouldn’t it be super cool if we counted backwards from ten, like a spaceship launch?”

Papyrus couldn’t decide whether he wanted to laugh or cry. Even if Sans would enjoy tonight no matter what... “THAT SOUNDS INTERESTING! LET’S DO IT!” Well, if this was the last night his brother would like space, Papyrus wouldn’t deny him this. “TEN…”

“nine…” Sans closed his eyes and grinned.

“EIGHT...” Papyrus grabbed his brother’s hand and turned towards the tent door.

“seven…” Sans entwined his phalanges with his brothers’ and squeezed.

“SIX.” Papyrus grabbed the tent zipper with his other hand and closed his eyes.

“five..!” Sans’ voice shook with excitement as he heard the tent door unzipping.

“FOUR!” Papyrus carefully made his way out of the tent without letting go of his brother or opening his eyes.

“three!” Sans felt himself being gently pulled by Papyrus out into the cool desert night.

“TWO!” Papyrus stopped, eyes still shut, and let go of his brother’s hand.

“one!” Sans tilted his head up.

Together, they opened their eyes.

‘OH,’ Papyrus thought, ‘MAYBE THE STARS REALLY DO DESERVE THEIR HYPE.’

Sans was staring at the sky with awe and wonder, more at ease than Papyrus had ever seen him. Papyrus had no doubt that Sans’ jaw would have dropped if it wasn’t fused to the rest of his skull.

Satisfied that his brother was enjoying the view, Papyrus looked up to see it himself.

It was…

Well…

It definitely was! It sure did exist! Or rather, it had existed several hundred years ago and they were only seeing it now? His brother had told him that little factoid earlier. In any case, it definitely was a view! Certainly a thing he was able to look at, if there wasn’t anything else to catch his attention!

“so, what do you think?” Sans’ voice was barely a whisper, “is the view everything you hoped for?”

“IT’S PERFECT,” Papyrus replied, gazing at the blissful look on his brother’s face. After all, Papyrus was never one to focus on the stars.