#like honestly as someone w ptsd that shit is SO IRRITATING

[krak-house]

Black Pete playing army wife was Not on my s2 bingo card

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #254

“i hate that it seems you were never enough; we were broken and bleeding, but never gave up.”

What’s the best gift you’ve ever gotten? My late dog Teddy. Well technically, it was a container of puppy chow behind the tree, but in essence, him. Has there ever been a person you regret ever being friends with? I don't think so? Do you think you have a good understanding of love? Yes. What do you want to do on your honeymoon? Relax and enjoy quality time w/ my spouse somewhere great. Do you think Medical Marijuana should be legalized? Yes. If you were forced to dye your hair another color, what color would you get? At this current time, silver. What do you think of your parent(s)? I love them, a lot. Who do you talk to on the phone most often? Actually talk, Mom. But I text Sara more. What’s a song that makes you feel happy? Uhhh "</code>" by MIW came to me first. What celebrity would you like to meet? M-M-M-mARk What is your favorite clothing store? I can't really say. I like Hot Topic's content most, but they're really not all that broad in size range, so it seems unfair to say them. What’s a good idea you’ve had recently? Hell if I know, I don't make those. Do you like to wear high heels? No. What are you most excited about right now? Nothing. Would you like to live in a different country? If so which one? Honestly, if it didn't mean leaving Mom behind, I'd go to Canada by now. Recent events have me fucking livid with America's healthcare system. What’s your favorite song from a movie? Like, it was made for the movie? Man, I dunno. Probably something off Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron, though. The soundtrack is magical. Where would you like to volunteer? Realistically, I don't know. A zoo would be incredible, but I handle heat incredibly poorly and also canfuckingnot pick up feces or touch vomit. So, that takes a big chunk out of what volunteers can do there. What’s the last song you listened to? "Another Life" by MIW is on repeat right now and I need to turn it the fuck off because I'm in a bad PTSD episode. Do you like being alone? Sometimes, yes, but not for too long. How do you find new music? YouTube recommendations, usually. What’s your favorite city? I don't have a favorite. I've only ever once been to an even remotely impressive one: Chicago. What’s the last YouTube video you watched? Some tarantula one. I'm fucking addicted to tarantulas now and need a Mexican red knee like now. Once we (hopefully) move, I'm gonna at least try talking Mom into it. Where are you going on your next trip? I don't know. If you had to make a six-hour cross-country journey, would you rather take the train, fly or drive? How come? Fly, if I had the window seat. It's relaxing. How long do your earphones tend to last before the connection goes and you have to replace them? Considering I'm like, constantly using them, Mom says they die fast, judging by how frequently I let her know I need a new pair. She got me a big box of them for Christmas, even. I've got one extra pair left. If you could dye your hair any color in the world, assuming it would look perfect with your coloring, what would you pick and why? Pastel pink bc aesthetic. Are you a fan of musicals? If you are, what ones have you seen live and which ones would you like to see? No. Have you ever had to give up something you were addicted to? Did you actually succeed? Yes. Have you ever had to work (or study) with someone that you really didn’t get along with? How did you deal with it (ignoring them, being nice, etc.)? Maybe at some point, idk. Have you ever had any problems with your wisdom teeth, or have they been taken out already? No. Which one of your senses would you miss the most if you lost it? Hearing, probably. That'd feel so lonely. Do you find your mood changes when you’re hungry or tired? Does eating or sleeping automatically cure you of a bad mood? I can definitely become irritable if I'm extremely hungry and/or tired. Sleeping helps me with a lot of problems, lmao. What’s the stupidest fight you’ve ever gotten into? Did you make up with that person or did you end up losing them over it? Oh idk. Probably something RP-related as a kid. Have you ever gotten really bad travel sickness? Has this put you off travelling or going by certain modes of transport in case it happens again? No, thankfully. What’s your opinion on prostitution? Should it be legal and regulated, or is it something that needs to be gotten rid of completely? I don't support it. Just leaving it at that. If it was a case of prostitution or being evicted from your home, which option would you pick (assuming you’d tried everything else to make money first)? Evict me. Morally, prostituting would kill me. I have family who thankfully I know would let me stay with them. Are you into piercings and tattoos? If not, do you judge people who are, and vice versa? Hell yeah, so I obviously don't judge people who are. What’s your opinion on places like Seaworld? Do you think keeping whales and dolphins in such small enclosures is cruel or a necessary evil? First: I'm not very educated on how similar *all* Seaworlds are. But in regards to keeping whales, it's inhumane as all fuck. They are WAY too big to be held in such a small space for our goddamn amusement. I support zoos who do what they do for conservation and educational purposes, but from my memory of Seaworld, that's not their primary concern. Who is one person that you no longer hang out with? Why did that association end? My former best friend. There's a novel on why I don't associate with her anymore, but the top reason would be she's just a drama magnet that does no wrong. Wonders why her life is so insane and tumultuous while never looking into herself as the potential reason. What was the last item you put into your pants pocket? I don't really wear pants with pockets, but I'm sure in the last case, it woulda been my phone or money. Who was the last person to endanger your life, whether it was accidentally or intentionally? Well I'm certain it was accidental, but idk what the most recent situation would be. What was the last thing you started over on? Job searching, I guess. What was the last task that you completed? Does eating breakfast count? Esp. when you really didn't want it but needed it? Have you ever failed at something extremely important to you? If yes, what? Ah, what a timely question. I dropped out of school for the third fucking time a few days back. When was the last time that you wanted time to move faster? Last night in my regular routine of waking up in the middle of the night twice/thrice. I sleep so poorly that I just want the morning to come at some point so it's "normal" for me to be up. ^Slower? Hm. I dunno. I don't have much reason to want time to slow lately. When was the last time you felt impatient with someone? Currently w/ Mom, but it's at a low level and probably isn't fair feeling impatient in the first place. Who was the last person that you called a “bitch”? I don't know. Probably playfully, anyway. ^Who, if anyone, was the last person to address you by that term? I also don't know. When was the last time you questioned whether or not you were making the right decision? Every time I make one lmao. Has a boy-/girlfriend ever suggested that you might want to lose some weight, or that it might make you look better? lol wow no. What is your idea of “too big” when it comes to weight? Once it comes to a point of infringing on your ability to function normally. ^How about “too thin”? Same as ^, really, it just goes in the opposite direction. Have you ever experienced an overly clinging boy-/girlfriend? Yeah, we lasted two weeks lmao. What is the most annoying thing your family members do on a daily basis, if anything? I only live with Mom, and she doesn't regularly do annoying stuff. With which family member do you get along with the least? The best? Least, my grandma. We've gotten kinda better though now that she's dying. Best, Mom. ^Why do you think that you don’t get along well with that family member? We have very, very averse beliefs and standards. Who is someone that you wish would be there for you more often? My sisters, honestly. Shit's going on with them, I always reach out to let them know I'm here. Something's wrong with me, I never hear a word. Have you ever felt like someone abandoned you? If yes, explain? BIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITCH- How often do you find that you are bored? Daily, nearly at all times. This is gonna sound pathetic, but I tend to be so bored so regularly that I experience passively suicidal thoughts now and again because I just feel being dead would almost be more exciting. That's something I'll never act on, but yeah. I have mega bad anhedonia. What activity has the best chance of holding your attention for a long period of time? Hm. Playing a game, maybe. Or if I'm watching a really good video on YT. Have you ever decided that you like/dislike someone based on their survey answers? Yup. What previews did you see at the last movie you saw in theaters? Hell if I remember. How many things are you a fan of on Facebook? Wow, a fucking lot. Back in the day I would "like" lots of those pages that just had funny/relatable names, and man does it pay off (usually) now. I Got The Memes. Do you have more friends on Myspace or Facebook? Probably Facebook? I don't really remember the friending process on MySpace besides the "top 8" thing that destroyed friendships, lmao. Have you ever been to a movie that sold out? Maybe? Idk. Have you ever been to a midnight movie? One. What’s your state’s weather usually like this time of year? Too fucking hot. Do you get those leg cramps in the middle of the night? No. What movie last made you too scared to go to sleep? *shrug* Is your cell phone a qwerty (full keyboard) or no? Yeah. What was the last website you logged onto (besides the one you’re on)? PetSmart to apply for a position as pet trainer. I hate chain pet stores, but whatever, I'm desperate. What’s your home page? Google. Do you have split ends? No. When you’re on a laptop, do you hook up a mouse or use the touchpad? I prefer to have a mouse. If you’re learning a language, what year are you in? I'm not anymore. Do you think you’re done growing or will you grow a couple more inches? I'm sure I'm done. What’s your mom’s mom’s name? Cecelia. Have you ever encountered a creepy neighbor? OKAY at my old place where I used to ride my bike all the time, there was this old man way down the road that liked to talk to me but he creeped me out so much that I started turning back before I got in sight of his place. Do you like the foam soap or the liquidy soap? Foam. Do you tend to lean towards bright colors or more subtle colors? Bright. Do you use British spelling even though you’re not British? No; I even change it in surveys a lot, lol. When was the last time you attended a barbecue? I don't have a clue. I don't like them. Can you handle movies involving lots of bugs and insects? Yeah. Are you borrowing books from anybody at the moment? No. What is one similarity between your parents? Christ... they seem incomparable by this point. Do you keep scissors in your kitchen? If so, where? Yes, in the drawer beside the fridge. When was the last time you used a payphone and who were you calling? I've never used one. Have you met everyone who lives on your street? No. Do you have a boyfriend? No. When did you last write out your name? Recently for something at school. Do you like being kissed on the neck? Yeah. What friend can you tell everything to? Sara. Would you be shocked if the last person you had feelings for texted you? No. What if you had a baby with the last person you texted? We're both cis females so physically can't. And neither of us want kids. Who knows your biggest secrets? Mom, Sara, Jason. Do you have any hickeys on you? No. Is there anyone you wish you could fix things with? Yeah. Who is someone that puts up with you no matter what? My mom. When was the last time you cried? Two days ago I sobbed for a good while. Can you honestly say you’re okay right now? Not really. Is there a girl you would do anything for? Anything? No. Is there a boy you would do anything for? No. Who IMed you on Facebook last? My friend Ian, but I haven't read it yet. What color was the last swimsuit you wore? Black. Have you ever been to an auto show? Yooo I remember as a kid, my family went with our friends to a monster truck show, I think it was? I was so not digging it and wanted to go home the whole time. What was the last thing you cooked for dinner? I had one of those Banquet microwavable dinners last night. Spicy chicken and mac 'n cheese. It's fuckin GOOD and really filling. Do you live in the city/town you were born in? No. Have you slept for longer than usual today? No, I slept terrible. Have you ever smoked a cigarette? No. Have you consumed alcohol today? If so, what? No. What’s your go-to website when you’re really bored? YouTube is my general go-to. Who was the main cook of your Thanksgiving meal last year? My sister. Do you have a passport? If so, how many stamps do you have in it? No. Have you ever been dumped really harshly? WHEEZE Have you ever taken classes for a musical instrument? Yes. Have you ever been on vacation with someone other than your family? Yeah. Do you live with your parents? With my mom. Can you do a blackflip, or anything else of that sort? No. What moment in your life have you been most scared? The night of the breakup, particularly when Mom dragged me back inside and I just literally melted. Do you have any exes you can’t stand anymore? What happened to cause you to feel that way about them? No. Do you ever make your own surveys, or just take them? I just take them. Have you ever actually thought you were pregnant? Were you? Yes, but it was entirely illogical, so I obviously wasn't. Anxiety and being terrified of pregnancy is fun. Are you more of a phone or a computer person? Computer. Do you like to cook, or do you prefer when other people cook for you? I don't cook. How old do you think you’ll be when you move out on your own? Who the fuck knows anymore. Do you have a job? If so, where do you work? If not, do you want one? No; yes. Have you ever ripped your pants in public? I don't think so? Do movies such as Saw and The Grudge scare you easily? No. How many best friends do you have? What are their names? One; Sara. What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever been dared to do? Did you do it? No clue. Can you drive? I mean I can, but I'm terrified of it, and my permit is expired anyway. What do you consider to be a good grade? What do you consider to be a bad grade? B; C and below. Have you ever had a teacher who hated you? No. Can you remember who your grade 5 teacher was? Did you like them? Yes, I adored them both. Do you know anybody that has severe allergies? Multiple people. Who was the last person you slow danced with? laskdjflka;jwe What’s your favourite song at the moment? Ah shit man idk. Do you prefer headphones or earbuds? Earbuds. Headphones aggravate my ears. Do you ever ride the city bus? How much does it cost you? We don't even have one here. How do you get to school? N/A What is the last book you read? Did you enjoy it? The first Wings of Fire book, and yes, very much. Do you scream out the answers while watching game shows on TV? Scream, no. I'll say them sometimes, though. Who in your life do you care about more than yourself? Mom, Sara. Jason, probably, as much as I hate to admit that. Would you ever consider adopting a child with a severe mental illness? HYPOTHETICALLY, if I even wanted kids, yes. I'm very empathetic and care a shitload about mental health, so I think I'd be a very good cheerleader for them. Which wild animal would you most like to have as a pet? Again hypothetically, a meerkat, but I DO NOT support them as pets and get very upset when I see them as such. What bill do you hate paying the most? I don't have any. When is the last time you got drunk and danced on a bar? Never. If you could move anywhere and take someone with you, who and where would it be? Sara to the mountains of NC. Favorite non-sexual thing to do with girl/boy? Play games together. Who from high school would you like to run in to? A handful of people.

[clarenecessities]

so. today. i was trying to keep from physical altercations (mostly to stave off the nagging of certain parties, Mom) but that wasn’t always an option.

i showed up a few hours early & joined the protest--someone (whose name i didn’t catch despite teaming up for like 90 minutes) gave me their spare megaphone bc i was “good at heckling” so that passed some time until the rally started & we moved onto noise tactics

the cops apparently learned from their failures on the 3rd, bc the plaza, instead of being roped off, was double-blockaded w traffic barriers. they had one fence between them and PeePee & one (+street) between them and us. so there were no physical altercations (baring one guy in a hawaiian shirt who just walked down the line trying to pick a fight, to baffled laughter) until the marching started

and the shit hit the fan

they got to go in the street, which is bullshit because not only had the cops been playing the same recording for 40 minutes telling us to get out of the street, but on the 3rd they had to stay on the sidewalk. i guess their whole cage set-up didn’t allow them to walk on the sidewalk, but traffic was still going on, you know? anyway, they got perhaps thirty feet & started to turn down an adjacent street, coming within feet of us, so naturally things escalated. people started throwing shit (mostly water bottles) on both sides, there was yelling, scuffling--i was hanging back, but i had a good view of the front line and it was... rough.

so the cops let this go on for about a minute, then start firing something at us with their not-guns. i thought at first it was rubber bullets, because they were clearly aiming to hit us (and when has a cop ever used a rubber bullet properly?) and i got nailed in the foot--my good foot! still mad--and it hurt like hell, but then i heard some coughing. it occurred to me i hadn’t inhaled in a while, so i took an experimental whiff & promptly had to book it because turns out i’d been shot with a pepperball! .... honestly, compared to the bear mace it’s kind of a walk in the park (pun intended). my shoe is super spicy now though :(

so we were forced down a block by the pepper cloud. i helped get a woman with a head injury to a couple of medics, but it was just a cut so i gave a concerned party some of my nitrile gloves & kept going.

a block up, PeePee was starting to come back up towards us. the initial plan was to block off the street, but that didn’t work very well because almost immediately, they charged us. well--the military LARPers did, anyway. if you’ve never been rushed by a bunch of forty year olds in flak vests and american flag capes, i recommend it. shit’s kind of hilarious.

i was still trying to avoid fights, mostly kept to people’s flanks to provide support as we moved down the street. cops set off a whole mess of flashbangs. what the fuck is the tactical point of a flashbang? all it does is get people frenzied. if you’re storming like, someone’s house, sure, but trying to get people not to attack anything? c’mon. anyway. i was watching someone’s back, didn’t actually engage, when this old guy comes up and just shoves me? no preamble, no gesture, just--shove. so i sort of stared at him incredulously for a second, like, are you fucking kidding me?

and uh. i may have. blacked out. a little bit

next thing i knew, i had his flak vest in one hand and his jaw in the other. no conscious memory of moving. i was kind of shocked/bewildered so i didn’t really resist when one of his buddies scooped me off and tossed me down the street. scraped my elbow & my knee but those are my worst injuries of the day so like hey! could definitely be worse.

i’m not gonna lie y’all i’m kinda freaked out about that part. what’s the point of training and shit if my gd PTSD is gonna take over whenever it can? why the fuck did lizard-brain!clare think it was a good idea to just grab a man’s jaw??? might have to avoid combat situations in general instead of just hanging back..... guess my shitty fuckin’ brain didn’t get the memo.

anyway. someone helped me up (by the bag again; why do people think hauling me up by the bag is a good idea?), the cops eventually separated us, and PeePee was forced back down the street, so they moved up another block.

now here, fate smiled upon us. the thing about this area is, there’s a lot of construction. and what do they have at construction scaffolds? barriers! do you see where this is going bc they sure didn’t. we built a barricade. it was amazing. victor hugo’s ghost shed a single tear.

well, so they turned on down and went up another block. some folks in black bloc grabbed a construction cordon and carried it up.

they went up a fourth block. they were moving pretty slowly between the cops and the flag-waving, so we beat them there. we blocked off the street. people threw some more shit--including a recycling bin? like the kind you leave out on your curb? it was incredible. so there were some more flashbangs, some more pepperspray (though fortunately i was across the street from it this time). that’s when the cops declared it a riot, and we were ordered to vacate the area.

PeePee slunk back to the plaza and we regrouped in the restricted zone. We headed back up in a different direction than we’d come, and found that in the interim, the cops had closed the adjoining park.

so it now goes na/zis, barrier, cops, barrier, street, cops, entire park, cops, street, us.

it’s almost as if the cops don’t want the na.zis to get hurt?

kind of a terrible idea, anyway. they wouldn’t let us in the park, but we were still allowed on the sidewalk, so we just walked right by ‘em. PeePee was too scared to march again so there was more waiting around. A cop (Brillard, i believe) yelled at a native woman for conducting a smudging ceremony & told her to go back in the park... which we were banned from. she blessed his family.

eventually the PeePee rally was also declared a riot, and they were ordered to leave the plaza. why they weren’t declared a riot at the same time as the rest of us remains unclear, given that they were the aggressors in all cases of assault (well; battery. i did see a lot of our folks throwin’ shit) and kept trying to stab people with their flagpoles bc the cops had taken their weapons as condition for entry to the plaza. i for one quite like that condition, as it kept me from getting bear maced again (really cannot overemphasize how much i hate bear mace).

they moved to the sidewalk outside of the plaza and proceeded to talk for another forty minutes or so. during this time, our side was pepper sprayed again, for reasons i still don’t understand? we were standing across the street, perfectly peaceful--we literally had our hands in the air. anyway one tall fella was hit in the eye (he was wearing sunglasses, but like damn, that’s not a good place for a pepperball) and i was actually able to do something useful for once. so i helped him flush his eyes & then another person came up and poured straight-up antacid in there?? i just kind of looked at her like ‘hey, why?’ and she told me to rinse it with my water. i showed her where it said ‘L.A.W.’ but i don’t think she knows what L.A.W. is ‘cause i had to explain it wasn’t water. the dude was okay though, he filmed the whole process.

so i dunno maybe i’ll get some better training and focus more on street medic stuff? it did feel nice to help him, and i didn’t black out even a little.

eventually i moved up and around a few blocks to see what was going on--they’d been chanting Rufio (incorrectly) because one of their guys goes by Rufio for some ungodly, un-Basco-sanctioned reason. anyway i guess that guy got arrested.

they were starting to leave by the time i got up there, and there were so few of us that we were actually outnumbered by a couple people (as opposed to our 4:1 odds all day). the cops were standing by but didn’t intervene when PeePee came over to our side of the street and people started getting up in each other’s faces. I for one had an enchanting conversation with a man who doesn’t know how child support works and thinks abortions are worse than the ICE centers, despite his adamant claims that the children there are being r*ped? it was somewhat incoherent, i’m not gonna lie to you. he also tried to stare me down but kept fucking it up. anyway he got pulled away by a shepherding Proud .Boy and they continued to retreat up the block, with our contingency in leisurely pursuit and the cops having moved to the other side of the street.

there’s some speculation based on how they handled today that this was intentional on their part, and not merely incompetence. the two groups were very often put into situations that allowed for physical clashes--sometimes forced into them--and the cops waited an inordinately long time before intervening. if the new policy is “let them fight” i have to say i’m on board, because no fuckin’ way would those cowards show up.

anyway a Proud /Boy punched someone and they retaliated, knocking the PB over. It was just those two hits (followed by some yelling but nothing physical) and the cops swooped on in. well. their flashbang did. once again i’d like to complain that flashbangs are absolutely useless as a riot suppression tactic and in fact actively encourage people to riot? anyway i got hit with some shrapnel in my upper back but idt it broke the skin. i’m mostly just irritated.

the cops walked us down the street, yelling at us the whole time (”move back!” “turn around!” “pay attention!”) but there were only about six of ‘em and perhaps ten of us? so it felt a bit more conversational than usual. the person they were mostly yelling at asked if it was necessary to point a gun at him, and the cop insisted it wasn’t a gun (it was a pepperball “launcher” (cough: gun)) according to “terminology”. when i asked if the yelling was necessary and suggested he use his words, he maintained they were ‘very loud words’. so i gave him shit about terminology. one woman suggested they do their jobs better and a different cop flipped up his visor and yelled “YOU ARE AN ADULT” which was as bewildering as it was hilarious. i think he was trying to suggest we should protect ourselves from the na/zis, but like...... we always have? cops have never fucking protected us. they just sucked at protecting the na.zis today.

anyway they all got on their rented “CHOOL BUS” and puttered on back to vancouver at the end of the day, so a rather anticlimactic finish compared to the 3rd’s waterfront clash.

one guy tried to heckle my phone case? but like, very poorly? and when it didn’t work he started heckling my boobs? like sir... sir..... i don’t care what you think of my fucking boobs? why are you hanging out of a chool bus window to tell me this when you look to be about 57 years old??

all in all, a much more violent event, but i’m much less injured, owing primarily to the hands off approach the cops took. all my injuries this time were a result of my own hubris (and getting thrown down a street i guess, but if we’re being real that one’s on my hubris too) as opposed to being a pinata for a pissy porcine party like i was on the 3rd

i’m not even as sore this time since i’ve been actually exercising this month! i’m basically unstoppable now

[frcstwclf-moved]

by popular demand (aka @warricrbcrn suggested it and i told her to) i’m going to answer all of these questions. answers under the cut.

abalone: what kind of situations compromise my muse emotionally answered

aegerine: my muse's opinion of the supernatural he has respect for the spirits of his ancestors, obviously, but that’s really it

agate: how my muse calms down answered

blue lace agate: my muse's favorite form of communication (verbal, letters, texting, etc.) verbal communication is really the only way he communicates (he rarely writes letters and doesn’t have much experience with sign or anything else) so i guess that.

fire agate: if my muse is brave or cowardly he’s a big brave boi. he’s not stupidly brave, but still incredibly so. he isn’t fearless either, but he’ll jump into a fight no problem if need be.

moss agate: if my muse has a high or low opinion of themself answered

amazonite: what kind of situations call for my muse to be dishonest answered

amethyst: what my muse would most like to be able to shape-shift into ... a wolf.

ammolite: how lucky or unlucky my use is considering all of the events in his life, unlucky. not that he believes in luck, but anyway.

angel aura quartz: my muse's opinion of LGBT+ issues not really something he has experience with. i don’t know that LGBT+ issues were really a thing for orcs of his time; they existed, i’m sure, but considering the way that a lot of orc culture works and how intolerable a lot of it is in general, gay, trans, and other orcs of similar identities and sexualities were probably closeted and thus Durotan probably has no idea about any of it. that’s not to say he wouldn’t support them; he feels everyone has the right to a happy life. everyone. (willing to make a longer post on this later)

apache tears: a sadness headcanon he just vanishes and stops talking when he’s sad. he’ll just sit there. you have to make sure he even survives to the point where he’ll break into emotion again, be it negative or positive, because he’ll just sit in the same spot and stare at the ground for fucking hours.

apatite: a headcanon about my muse's intuition it’s saved his life so many times, its ridiculous. his gut-feeling is his best friend, but it seems to clash a lot with his reasoning, especially around Gul’dan’s time of power.

apophyllite: my muse's religious/spiritual beliefs what religion would you call the orcs? they worship their ancestors, it’s not like there’s any god at play there.

aquamarine: where my muse feels most calm/relaxed his home. sitting around their big communal fireplace in the center of their village with his family.

biotite: the biggest problems my muse is currently dealing with being dead. lol

bloodstone: how my muse sees themself as part of the world at large Durotan just feels like he’s another orc chieftain doing his job. he doesn’t understand why so many people think he’s so special, outside of standing up to Gul’dan.

calcite: my muse's social tendencies (introverted vs extroverted, parties vs one-on-one conversations, etc.) he likes people, but anymore than the orcs in his clan and he feels a little overwhelmed. he really only had one good friend that he talks to consistently, and that’s Orgrim, but as far as chieftain-y things his social skills are decent. he’ll tread water until he physically can’t handle it anymore, which is incredibly rare.

carnelian: an art-related headcanon Durotan actually has some artistic talent. he can kinda sketch landscapes and people, if he tries.

celestite: how my muse deals with anxiety not healthily, lmao. he bottles it up until it explodes into one giant mass of anxiety, which means he’ll go sulk for a few hours if possible. if it isn’t, he gets REALLY irritable REALLY quickly.

chalcedony: the saddest my muse has ever been the morning he discovered Ga’nar’s body, the morning after Garad had died and Durotan had been named chieftain. the grief, the anxiety, and the overall reality of it overwhelmed him until he was physically trembling. he spent that night weeping in his mother’s arms.

chalcopyrite: how my muse deals with ending relationships it’s hard for him to do, but if there comes a point where he has to cut ties with someone, he’ll drop’em like they aint shit. no questions asked.

charoite: who my muse looks up to answered

chrysocolla: a money-making headcanon he doesn’t have any, lol.

copper: how I think my muse will end up when they're older he’d be an awesome, wise old chieftain tbh. he’d know alllllll the Frostwolf secrets to teach the kiddos. he’d be heavily grieved by the clan, had he died of old age.

coral: how my muse views the natural world it’s incredibly precious to him. watching Draenor die was one of the hardest things he’s ever done.

diamond: a sex headcanon [ SWEATS ]

dolomite: a sleep headcanon Durotan is a light sleeper, and he either lays on his side or his back. he is often kept up at night by bouts of night terrors and general insomnia, so he’ll stare at the ceiling of the tent until it’s early enough for him to leave and roam around camp without being questioned

emerald: how my muse tells someone they love them without words touches and gestures. arm around your shoulders, a hug, a pat on the arm, that thing people do where they rest their hand on your lower back, hand on your shoulder... the works.

fluorite: what my muse's room looks like it’s relatively neat, i imagine Draka kicks any mess in their tent back into shape. having two sloppy older brothers kinda made him wanna be organized considering there was a time where all five of them lived in a tent together and, from personal experience, sharing sleeping spaces with your siblings fucking sucks

fossil: what my muse's dream job is he really doesn’t have any quarrel with being chieftain. he doesnt know what else he’d do, honestly.

galena: what it's like to be in a relationship with my muse lots of playful bickering and play fighting, but he also will show regularly how sincerely and how much he cares, whether in words or gestures is up to him.

garnet: what my muse's perfect partner would be DRAKA.

gold: my muse's financial situation i don’t know how financially dependent Frostwolves are. pretty sure they just hunt, make, or gather everything they need. he’s doing fine.

hematite: how squeamish my muse is he’s witnessed graphic cannibalism, stabbed a numerous amount of people and gutted and/or beheaded just as many, and has literally bathed his entire face in blood. he doesn’t care. the only thing that’s ever succeeded in making him puke that wasn’t caused by sickness was the combined stench of several hundred decaying bodies, sweaty gross B.O. bodies, and piss and fecal matter when he already felt incredibly put off by his situation. and he puked ONCE.

hiddenite: how much of an "inner child" my muse has jesus, he’s such a man-child. he’d be wrestling in the mud with Orgrim well into his 40′s, knowing him.

iolite: my muse's drinking habits Durotan doesnt drink often but when he does he gets fucked UP. waiting for the day he wakes up in bed next to Blackhand or something tbh.

jade: if my muse would ever cheat on a partner NEVER. hes loyal as fuck. plus Draka would flog him

jasper: what my muse would be like as a parent the dad who tries to be cool and hip and relatable w his kid bc he loves him but just embarrasses Go’el

kyanite: an anger headcanon he screams into Stormfang’s pelt, sometimes. as if killing the poor fucking thing wasn’t enough.

lapis lazuli: where 'home' is to my muse anywhere that his family is. they are his home as much as Frostfire is.

lodestone: what kind of people gravitate towards my muse all kinds of people, honestly. he’s a charismatic and fair leader that’s well-loved by his clan, people like that.

malachite: what my muse as a child thought they would be when they grew up he thought that he and Orgrim would be the clan’s mightiest hunters. he hadn’t a care in the world about being chieftain.

mica: what my muse views as their worst personality trait he thinks he doesn’t have a good enough hold on his temper. he’s constantly afraid of snapping and killing someone without meaning to.

moonstone: my muse's opinions on outer space he thinks the idea of it is cool as shit, even if all he’s ever seen are the moon and stars from the ground. he thinks it’s beautiful.

mother of pearl: if my muse tends to lift people up or bring them down he’s always tried to bring them up, and he usually succeeds. Durotan has never been a pessimist, and he’s always been able to inspire and invigorate the Frostwolves at their lowest points.

nebula stone: how good my muse's memory is very sharp and keen. he can remember things that were said or happened years ago like it was yesterday.

obsidian: which of the seven deadly sins my muse would be probably wrath or pride. Durotan’s temper and lack of self control when upset has always been one of his greatest downfalls, and the Frostwolves are kinda known for being incredibly proud of their heritage and who they are. i feel like he’s a closer match to wrath, just because he’s a bit more humble than, say, Garad.

opal: how creative my muse is he’s moderately creative. he’s not really an artist or a creator, but he enjoys and appreciates creativity and the arts and would rather delight in others’ ideas instead of wrack his brain for his own.

pearl: a mental health headcanon anxiety and stress are eating away at his psyche 3/4 of the time, but he’ll be damned before he admits that to anyone. his PTSD gives him a lot of hell, too. he’ll wake up in a cold sweat right out of a nightmare about his father or one of his brothers or Stormfang, and he’s even had ones concerning that whole cannibalism Nokrar situatuon, but instead it’s the whole clan lying there gutted and eaten, wolves and all. he doesn’t really have flashbacks, unless something REALLY fucked up is going on and it somehow pertains to one of those things. he feels neverending guilt about his entire life in general and not having been able to do more for the people he’s lost. it’s not healthy, at all, and occasionally he’ll open up about it to someone he trusts. usually doesn’t happen all that often, though.

petalite: what my muse would do if they found a wallet on the street ”WHO’S WALLET IS THIS”

pyrite: a physical health headcanon i don’t think that he’s as ripped as everyone seems to think he is? I mean yea he’s buff and strong and huge but i don’t think he’s got a perfect six-pack or anything. a very toned dad bod, if you will

quartz: how my muse thinks other people see them as an authority figure, or a friend. or an enemy. depends on who ‘people’ is.

rhodonite: if my muse prefers elegance or convenience CONVENIENCE.

rubellite: if my muse has any 'triggers' that inspire painful memories Ga’nar and Fenris, honestly. he avoids mentioning them in conversation like the plague. the names themselves ARE painful memories.

ruby: a happiness headcanon if he’s smiling with all of his teeth showing, it means he’s fucking ECSTATIC.

sapphire: if everyone my muse knew was hanging off a cliff and they could only choose three to save, the rest certainly dying, who they would choose JESUS CHRIST I HATE THESE. he’d take Go’el, Draka, and Orgrim, probably. watching the rest of the clan plummet off a cliff (HIS FUCKING MOTHER BEING A PART OF THEM), he’d NEVER forgive himself.

serpentine: how my muse would seduce another [alt: how my muse makes their money] DUROTAN? SEDUCE SOMEONE??? H A

silver: if my muse prefers masculinity or femininity he really doesn’t give a damn. what’s even the difference, in orc culture? everyone’s got long hair, everyone’s wearing skirts, everyone’s kicking ass and taking names... how does it work

tsavorite: if my muse believes in destiny or fate answered

ulexite: how empathetic/sympathetic/compassionate my muse is extremely. he cares about everyone and everything, and doesn’t want to hurt people if he doesn’t have to. unakite: what my muse's ideal pet would be his wolfie, Nightstalker. loves him to bits

verdite: my muse's ethnicity/family history an unbroken line of Frostwolf chieftains, apparently, and he descended from the nomadic Frostwolf Clan

zebra stone: what gets my muse excited wolf pups. hunting. Draka. Orgrim. Go’el. Geyah. weaving. horse-play. his clan mates. THERES A LOT.

zoisite: does my muse believe everything's going to work out for them in the end or not? ... yes. he really, truly believes that everything will be okay.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #82

“there’s a child out on the battlefield, a pistol in each hand.”

so, i’m guessing you’re single?   not anymore, no. would you ever date someone because of money?   fuck that shit. your ex is sitting next to you, with their new partner, what do you do?   i'm going to be realistic.  first, i'd demand him and her both to fuck off.  don't move?  i'm fucking punching her teeth out. do you have a reason to smile right now?   i guess so, but i'm not. have you had sex today?   i never have. do you remember the last girl you texted?   my mom, yeah. are you stubborn?   oh you have no idea. has anyone called you perfect before?   yes, but they're wrong. where is the biggest scar on your body?   on my left shin.  i scratched the living shit out of it with my own nails because it was so itchy. have you ever been told you were amazing?   yes, and they're also wrong. would you date someone who was addicted to drugs?   HELL no. do you get irritated easily?   very, sadly. would you rather be a blonde or a brunette?   blonde, really.  easier to dye. have you ever had feelings for 2 people at the same time?   yes, i do right now. do you believe that leaving a significant other for someone else is ever a good idea?   i mean, it can be. if you found someone seemingly perfect for you, but it turned out they had a child… would you still give the relationship a chance?   not at this age.  literally the only situation in which i would do that is if it was jason. is it possible to ‘fall out of love’?   yeah. what happened last time you got drunk?   nothing, really.  i've never been smash-faced drunk.  the only time i've ever been drunk i was still pretty aware of what i was doing, which wasn't much. have you ever thrown up from drinking?   no, but i have thrown up from taking medicine like 15 minutes before drinking literally a sip of alcohol. do you find piercings attractive?   generally, yes. have you gone through a lot emotionally, or has life been easy thus far?   i've been through enough to take down a lot of people, honestly. ever got suspended from school?   no. what would you do with a $10 bill you found on the ground?   if there's no source of identification around, i'm going to keep it. are you ticklish?   yes, mainly on my feet. have you taken someones virginity?   no. would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh?   nope. who was the last person you danced with?   colleen.  can't decide if i miss her or not. do you tan in the nude?   i don't tan period. have you ever had the chicken pox?   i have not. have you ever been evicted?   yes. would you grow your own garden?   no.  i'd honestly be too lazy to take good care of it. do you know anyone who snores?   lots of people. when I say ‘foxy lady’ what comes to mind?   the jimi hendrix song. would you own a siamese cat?   sure, they're very cute. do you like deviled eggs?   NO. what is your favorite horror movie?   "blair witch project 2: book of shadows" have you ever seen a lunar eclipse?   yep. what is your favorite daft punk song?   i only know "technologic" what is your favorite type of museum?   ones with dinosaur fossils/skeletons. if you had children or do would you tell them the truth about santa claus?   eventually i'd tell them, but of course i'd raise them to believe in santa. what color are your slippers?   tan.  they're meerkats. ;3; which accents can you emulate pretty well?   i've been told i speak british so well that i sound native. are you more awkward talking to people in real life or online?   real life, absolutely.  i'm not half bad online. do you think you’ll ever manage to do everything you want to?   absolutely not. are you a good driver? if you can’t drive yet, do you think you’ll be good?   no.  i don't even have my license yet.  i go into total panic mode when i drive; i grip the wheel like i'm driving through the apocalypse.  i also have tremors, and also due to certain meds, idk if i can even get my license. what is/was your favorite thing about school?   seeing jason. have you ever been a complete fangirl/fanboy over anything?   @ rhett&link/gmm, markiplier, silent hill, meerkats... i need to chill lmao. have you ever been to a protest?   no. are you afraid of the dark?   no. what comes up on your recommended list on youtube?   gmm videos, markiplier videos, metal music... what’s the largest animal you’ve ever had as a pet?   we had this huge lab mix (pretty sure he was part great dane) that was technically my older sister's dog named harley for a while.  he was huge. what is something you like to have conversations about?   my fandoms bc i'm pathetic, deep, philosophical things, music... what is something unusual that annoys you?   walking in the out door and out the in. who is taller, you or your best friend?   i don't have a best friend anymore. which time zone do you live in?   eastern standard when was the first time you ever listened to your favorite music artist?   all seven?  well. ozzy osbourne: 6th grade, going through mom's cds metallica: ^ marilyn manson: ^ otep: i heard "ghostflowers" in a video and really like it, so looked up more of their music a day to remember: recommended videos, actually. cradle of filth: umm... iii feel like my first song by them was "tonight in flames," but i don't remember where i heard it. rammstein: i heard "waidmanns heil" on that one rock band game. have you ever dated someone with longer hair than yours?   i have not. what is/was your favorite stuffed animal growing up!   a moose named brownie what is your state or country’s minimum wage?   $7.25.  pathetic, i know. what is your favorite constellation and why?   don't have a favorite. if you could have any hair style you wanted, what would it look like?   don't fucking judge me, but i sincerely and honestly love the big, emo swoop.  my hair is just so thick so it's like impossible to get it to work with me. can you play any instruments?   i played the flute for yeeeaaars, but like, i don't even remember most notes. what is your favorite topic in history class?   the holocaust name one dream that ruined your day when you woke up.   my dad raped me. would you like to marry whoever you’re seeing right now?   i don't know yet, we haven't been together long at all.  i'm not making that decision yet. do you prefer candles or incense?   incense do you eat candy corn?   ew, no. have your parents ever thought you were gay? what happened?   no. are your parents more liberal or conservative?   conservative. when was the last time you saw your best friend?   a few weeks ago when she essentially told me to get my shit and go. how many jobs have you ever had? (including things like babysitting)   two. if you’ve seen both, did you prefer the disney version or the tim burton version of alice in wonderland?   burton's version is actually my all-time favorite movie. what do you see yourself doing in 10 years?   you want me to be honest?  an unsuccessful photographer, probably.  hopefully married by then, but who knows. what was your favorite 90's show?   pokemon, motherfuckers. what is your favorite fruit?   strawberries how do you feel about oral?   it's just... really gross to me. what do you wish you didn't know?   many, many things.  but mainly, that some people just do not cherish love. favorite kind of chips?   flamin' hot cheetos has anyone ever told you that they wanted to marry you?   hm.  odd.  he's not around anymore. has anyone ever told you that you have a cute nose?   lol wut how many kids do you want?   at this point in my life, i don't even know if i want any to begin with.  if i do though, two is preferable. does anyone call you babe?   tyler does.  i don't exactly like it, but i don't think we're really close enough yet for me to be brave enough to tell him so. where does most of your family live?   well.  mom's family is in new york, dad's is in ohio and michigan, and my very immediate family (parents + immediate sisters) lives here in nc. have your parents ever smoked pot?   idk. rent a movie or go to movies?   go to the movies! do you know anyone who works at mcdonald’s?   not personally. where do your cousins live?   new york and ohio. do you like the all-american rejects?   not particularly. have you ever finished a whole video game?   plenty, yeah. which one of your friends has great music taste?   hmm.  i mean, a good number of them do. how do you feel about death?   it's a very scary, mysterious thing. do you have any cats?   not currently. do you believe in the underworld?   well, i believe in hell. what is your favorite flower?   tiger lilies have you ever been betrayed?   i have been betrayed. where do you think we go when we die?   heaven or hell.  i used to believe in purgatory, but that's a catholic thing. when was the last time you went to a funeral?   yeeeaaars ago. are you scared of cancer?   i mean... who isn't?  i don't readily worry about it, even though it looks like it may run in my family.  we've seen thyroid, breast, and kidney cancers. how many phobias do you have?   i only have three that i consider to be, by definition, "phobias," those three being whale sharks, dolls, and pregnancy. how many bisexual friends do you have?   two that i can think of off the top of my head. do your parents wear glasses?  mom does to drive and read, and dad does to read. when was the last time you threw up?   only like a week back.  i think my latuda makes me nauseous. do you have mental issues?   oh, you know, only chronic depression, general anxiety, social anxiety, ptsd, borderline personality disorder, and potentially avoidant personality disorder.  fun times, right? are you good at chemistry?  NOOOOOO do you have online friends?  alex, shay, jax, lona, mini, sam, alyssa, sammy, others... safe to say i have more online than "real" friends. do you like your handwriting?  i do. are you nosy?  very. have you ever been called emo?  yeah.  gonna be totally honest here, i don't pay attention to what the stereotype is anymore, but i probably am one lol. do you have a big nose?   no. how long has it been since you kissed someone?  well over a year. if someone was to ask you if you were okay right now, are you?  for once, sure. the last person you held hands with go to your school?  he did, we're both no longer in school. what person of the opposite sex makes you laugh most?   link neal and mark fischbach<3 do you have any medication you have to take every day?  latuda, lamictal, propanalol, birth control for period cramps... did you reject or accept your last friend request?  reject.  we had no mutual friends.  the fuck did you find me and what do you want. do you like pretzels?  the soft ones.  hard ones are eh. if you have a girlfriend/boyfriend, how long have you been together?   like a week. do you look at older pictures and laugh?   no, i'm usually the one cringing. what was the first thing you ate today?   nothing yet but i currently hear bacon popping ahhhh~ have you ever tried lemon brownies?  no, sounds disgusting. have you ever been to hawaii?   no.  i have a cousin there though, actually. do you have a sister that steals your things?   no. what is your father’s middle name?  john do you think that you’re a good person?  i guess. are you on medication for anything?  bipolarity and anxiety.  i was on an anti-depressant, but apparently you're not supposed to do that if you have bipolarity. have you ever been a gymnast or a cheerleader?   ... i was a cheerleader when i was really little. are you irish?  yeah. do you know how to insert a tampon?   yeah are you ever afraid to be yourself?  only always. how many people have told you they were in love with you?   one or two. are you emotional?   too emotional. who is one person that you no longer hang out with? why did that association end?   colleen.  because essentially, she's a judgmental child in a 21-year-old body. who was the last person to endanger your life, whether it was accidentally or intentionally?   ummm.  idk. have you ever experienced an overly clinging boy-/girlfriend?   no. with which family member do you get along with the least? the best?   least, my grandma.  best, probably my dad. have you ever felt like someone abandoned you? if yes, explain?   i felt like my dad did for a few years, but jason absolutely did. what are some unfair stereotypes against women?   JUST SOME?!  well, above anything else, that we're less competent than men and are overall the weaker gender. how about against men?   that they're all insensitive pigs and that they must be logical at all times. who was the last person to make you feel like you mattered?   mom, i guess, for bringing me to debbie's so i wouldn't be home with nothing to do. do you prefer vertical or horizontal stripes?   horizontal. can you name all 50 american states?   probably not. have you ever ridden a motorcycle?   no. have you ever needed stitches?   on my chin, yeah. have you ever been in a submarine?   no. do you think barbie is a negative role model for young girls?   in some ways, sure.  unrealistic expectations can be set. have you ever been in a hot tub or sauna?   hot tub, yeah.  i will absolutely never go in a sauna. do you believe there used to be dragons?   nope. who’s your favorite god from ancient history?   i'm not entirely sure. who was your first kiss?   jason have you ever carved a pumpkin?   a badass one, i must say. did you ever have a treehouse as a kid?   no. have you ever appeared on youtube?   ohhhh god. could you ever have an affair with a married person?   noooo. have you ever planted a tree?   yes.  an apple tree, i think. can you count your number of serious relationships on one hand?   one, so yes how about number of sexual partners?   again, one, so yeah. what’s your middle name?   marie.  my catholic middle name is catherine tho and i still use it because that's part of my upbringing, history, and making of who i am. do you have any siblings?   two immediate sisters, ashley and nicole, three half-sisters named misty, mary kathryn (katie), and tiffany (whom i've never met), and a half-brother named robert (bobby). do you care if people hate you for no reason?   i honestly kinda do. are you one of those people who gets jealous of boys/girls your current bf/gf dated?   nah.  their relationships ended for a reason, so why be jealous? your last ex runs up to you, kisses you, & tells you they want you back. you?   this is the first occasion in my life where i can honestly say i think i'd slap him, roll my eyes, and walk away. is it easy to make you cry?   painfully easy. what color is your hair naturally?   i was born dirty blonde, but it turned brown with age. are you afraid of heights?   in some situations, yes. have you ever laughed so hard you cried?   i do that VERY easily.  like, i SOB. do you find piercings attractive?   in general, sure. do you find tattoos attractive?   again, generally. do you curse in front of your parents?   with dad, i'm totally open.  mom, i generally don't say "fuck." do you like eating mashed potatoes?   no, i hate mashed potatoes. have you ever been called a bad influence?   no. have you ever been to disney world?   i have. do you ever play games on the computer?   i currently can't, because my gaming laptop currently has a fried psu or graphics card.  i used to play repeats of both the "amnesia" games (particularly the sequel), i'd occasionally progress in "outlast," and i regularly played "world of warcraft," which was very important to me for like two years.  i guess conditions have kinda forced me to quit, but i still vaguely keep up with what's going on in the game. do you and your significant other have a special song? what is it?   no. what if you found the last person you kissed, in bed with the last person you texted?   ... well that's a mess because that's a gay scene i couldn't even begin to concoct the last person you held hands with - have you ever kissed them?   on the cheek.  honestly because i felt pressured to. is there anything you would like to say to your most recent ex?   no.  i have literally nothing more to say. if your friends are sexually active but you aren’t, does that bother you? have you ever felt pressured to have sex before you were ready, because your friends had done it?   it doesn't bother me, no.  and i never felt pressured because my friends had done it, but rather by my age, i guess.  it's a very weak thought and honestly does not come often, so it's not much of a nuisance, but sometimes it is weird- not embarrassing, mind you- to admit "oh yeah i'm 21 and still a virgin despite having been in a very serious relationship." name 7 things that make you happy, and explain how it might affect you if you had to give them up.   oh god, seven?  that's a lot.  um.  well, writing it one; giving it up would be... kinda devastating, because i do it so much on a daily basis.  photography is another, and that would really fucking suck to give it up because i want to make a career out of that.  watching my favorite youtubers is a ginormous one, and tbh i'd rather die than have to lose that hobby.  um, i like gaming obvs, but i could give it up because i obviously have due to my computer issue and the fact my consoles are broken.  i don't enjoy not being able to do it, but i mean, i've survived.  i like drawing when i actually have inspiration... but i could also give it up because again, i pretty much have because i judge my work excessively, and i got tired of it.  i like exploring the outdoors/interesting areas, but i barely ever have the chance to even do this, so i mean, there's nothing to give up.  i enjoy fishing, but it's another thing i haven't done in actual years, so. what is your mom’s and dad’s favorite tv show?   i'm not sure... but both my parents really love "the big bang theory" when you were younger and misbehaved, what did your parents threaten you with?   mom would threaten to count to one, lmao.  i always assumed zero meant i'd get spanked. who has the biggest ego you know?   jason's best friend dillon. how would you react if your last ex wanted to get back together?   ugh. do you and your family go on a vacation ever year?   no. who was your most romantic moment with?   jason who does your most embarrassing moment involve?   also jason. does your dad swear?   yeah. when you like someone, do you picture what your children will look like?   well that's remotely creepy lol, no. do you know how to tap dance?   i know how to clog, and i mean, it's the same thing, just different shoes. are you craving any food right now? if so, what?   yeah, i want pizza. ;-; what’s your favorite flavor of skittles?   RED when was the last time you used oil pastels?   high school if pot was finally legalized where you live, what would you do?   quite honestly be mad because people are fucking stupid.  as if cigarettes weren't enough of an issue. how bad are your hangovers?   i've never had one. do you think taco bell is nasty?   well i don't like mexican, so... have you ever taken a break from facebook or other social media? why?   i haven't. who knows about your tumblr account?   only online friends. where did you and your current interest go on your first date?   to the movies + a pizza place. who was your high school sweetheart? are you still in contact?   jason, and no. were you popular or invisible in high school?   totally invisible. have you ever experienced two people fighting over you (physically or mentally)? what happened?   juan and jason had "issues."  jason at least seemed to have very little issue with him, but juan absolutely loathed jason.  despite not really showing dislike towards him, there was one occasion where circumstances had it where both jason and juan were at my house, and the fucking tension was unreal.  jason and i had been dating for around a year now, so i mean i loved him, but i wasn't impressed with him bringing up certain things between he and juan (they weren't exactly fond of each other before me due to someone they had both had relations with); jason clearly meant these things to not be aggressive or anything, but rather to just be nostalgic, but y'know... just don't.  he was perfectly aware juan didn't like him; don't bait the dude.  nothing actually went wrong, but ugh, that was stressful and the distaste they had for each other was obvious. have you ever had an experience that was not in keeping with the sexual orientation you currently identify with?   no. did you go to preschool?   yeah. do you know your blood type?   a-, i'm pretty sure. could you be a teacher?   nope.  no way in hell could i handle like 20-30 kids. quick! chinese or mexican food?   chinese, but i don't like much of either. how many significant others have you had in your WHOLE life?   only one was truly "significant," but i'm been in a relationship with three others. do you hate your ex?   no, i don't. have you ever hurt yourself on purpose?   yeah. what’s your fast food restaurant of choice?   bojangle's.  ya'll outside nc don't know what you're missing, lol. what did you and your ex fight about most?   the fact he was 110% logic and had no consideration to his emotions. are you embarrassed by any of the songs in your itunes?   ... it's why i don't let anyone else use it lmao do you like to swim?   it's the one exercise i enjoy, really. have you ever gone on vacation with your boyfriend/girlfriend?   no.  really wanted jason to come with us to the beach one year when we had a dance competition, but he couldn't take off work that many days. how slowly or quickly would you say you eat?   i'm a very fast eater.  i mean i'm not messy, i just eat quickly. what outfit makes you feel the most attractive?   ... none? when you think about marriage, what thoughts come up?   not much, honestly.  kinda hard to think of much when you don't have a belief on whom you're gonna marry. other than yourself, who knows you the best?   it's still probably jason, honestly. do you know anyone who has autism/asperger’s syndrome?   i do know someone with asperger's has anyone of the same sex ever hit on you?   kinda indirectly. are you open to a same-sex relationship and why or why not?   no, because i'm heterosexual. do you think boys look good in skinny jeans?   sure. do you think it’s okay for boys to dress like girls and vice versa?   sure. what went wrong in your previous relationship?   he didn't believe in me. if you’re in one, is anything wrong with it now?   no. how would you react to being cheated on?   nothing in regards to being hurt surprises me anymore. is drinking and smoking a dating deal-breaker for you?   i absolutely will not date someone who smokes, and if you drink more than seldomly, i'm not putting up with you, either.