#like i can talk to yall in a nice neutral work setting but where we all look plain

[colorfulpumpkin]

one (1) socially anxious preschool teacher vs work holiday party at a mediocre restaurant

who will win?

[technowoah]

if you're taking asks for the prompts, can you do 11 and 17 from the angst list with george but have a fluffy ending? she/her pronouns pls

I Can Make It Right

SHSJS I HAVE SO MUCH ANGST IN MY INBOX YALL!

Thanks for the request babe! The way it came out was gender neutral i dont think I user she/her, but it still works trust me!

George x reader imagine (established)

11) "It's not important apparently"

17) "You already made me feel like shit so might as well finish me off"

⚠︎ angst with happy ending, unresolved issue but they're gonna fix it dont worry 😌, angry George, swearing

*** = flashback

Masterlist

You had stood infront of your bathroom mirror finishing up your makeup for the night. Your hair was already done and you had a nice outfit on, not to fancy and not too comfortable. While listening to a playlist George had made for you, you had put down the brushes you were using. It didnt really matter if you cleaned up your makeup that was littered all over the sink right now, but right now you were feeling good.

Today was your and George's 3rd year anniversary and you couldn't be happier about it. Today you two were going to dinner and doing something else which was supposed to be a surprise for you. It was a night on the town.

George and you met 4 years ago actually. You two started out as acquaintances, the slowly grew into friends and then one day he asked you to join him to dinner. At first you were oblivious to his actions, thinking he was just being a good friend, but turns out the more dates you two went on the more you caught on. He officially asked you to be his girlfriend 3 years ago today.

His friends keep on pressuring George to propose already, they think it's been long enough. The only thing close to marriage is a promise ring. He put the ring on your finger as a promise that one day he would marry you, everytime you doubt that he will propose you turn your attention to the cute ring on your finger.

You had turned off the bedroom lights and sat on your bed finally relaxing after struggling to find a decent enough outfit for tonight. George said that he was going to pick you up around 6:00 and now it is 5:47 so you had some time to spare.

You had found yourself scrolling through tiktok because you had nothing else better to do at this moment. It was a guilty pleasure of yours even though you and george both joked around about hating tiktok.

Time began to tick away so you had checked the clock on your phone which said 5:57 pm. You had grabbed shoes that you set up against your bed, slipped them on and grabbed all of your belongings for the night. You stationed yourself in the living room waiting till George came to the door.

Nervousness always came up before a date, it was the anticipation actually. You were excited and nervous about the date as you always were, but today for you was special. It was three years worth of beautiful love. You remembered the time he first said I love you too, it was just like it was yesterday.

***

"Hey y/n." George looked towards you. You both were sitting on a plaid, plush blanket with a brown woven basket ontop in between you two. It was just like the movies and that why you cringed because of how cheesy it was when George led you to it.

It was sweet, it was extremely sweet and you loved these dates that George always brung you too. You always felt special when you are sitting next to him.

You responded to George. "Yeah Gogy?" You laughed at the use of his nickname.

"Im trying to be serious right now and you call me Gogy." George smiled and shook his head. "Anyways, you know I love you, right?"

"Of course I do-"

"No I love you. I mean. I'm in love with you." George reached to rest his hand ontop of yours and repeated himself. "I'm in live with you y/n."

You wasted no time answering. "Im in love with you too."

***

6:03

George didnt show up yet, but there was no sweat. He was only 3 minutes late, maybe he ran into traffick. Your stomach was rumbling, but you didnt want to eat yet since you two we're planning to go to dinner. Patience is key, and it wasnt like he wasn't late before.

6:10

You started to get worried, it's been 10 minutes and still no sign of your boyfriend. You had gotton up several times to check outside of your door only to be met with no one. Your mind was jumping to conclusions about if he forgot your anniversary, but you shut those thoughts out for the time being.

6:19

Okay this is getting out of hand. You brung out our phone and began to text George, you couldn't believe that you had waited this long before texting the man.

Where are you? Ive been waiting for 29 minutes?!

[Sent: 6:20pm]

George what are you doing?

[Sent: 6:20pm]

You awaited his text message with your phone faced up on the coffee table infront of you. You didn't want to believe that George woukd forget, or overslept, but that was becoming truth the more minutes passed by with no call or text.

6:30

Calling him was useless, because he didn't answer. He didn't hang up on you he just wasn't picking up the phone, like he turned it off. You started to get worried if something happened to him, if he was in a situation where he couldn't call or text you. You wondered if he was safe at home and not out in the middle of the street.

In a flash all your worries subsided when your phone lit up with a notification.

ThisIsNotGeorgeNotFound is live:

Im Playing golf with my friends

That son of a bitch. Pissed off was an understatement, you were fuming. How could he end up streaming at home when you had constantly reminded him about this day, he knew damn well about this day too. How could he?

You ended up grabbing a jacket and your purse and ended up driving to George's place. It seemed like he was mocking you in a way, he knew you had notifications on for Twitch. You loved to support him and his career, but this was making a fool out of yourself.

Your hand tightly gripped the steering wheel as you tried not to run every red light you cane across. You finally came across George's home, you found a place to park and quickly got out of your car and sped walked your way to George's residence. Finally making up to George's door you knocked harshly on the door probably making more noise than what you intended too. You continuously banged on his door until you got fed up.

Remembering that George had given you a key to his house you dig through your purse to get your set of keys out anr unlock his door. You stomped inside his house and closed the door behind you.

"GEORGE! GEORGE!" You yelled through the house. You were being reckless and annoying, but you didnt care at this point you were fuming and needed to tell George how you feel.

You had made your way to George's recording room where he was talking to his friends on discord. George looked towards you in shock clearly not hearing the sounds you were making throughout his house.

"Y/N?!" George yelled and muted his microphone.

"What the hell are you doing?" You exclaimed back.

"Im streaming thats what Im doing!" George sassed back at you, not paying attention to his screen and the chat.

"Dont get smart with me. End the stream."

"What?! No!"

"You heard me, we need to talk." You crossed your arms across your chest. Your heart was beating too fast for your liking and you tried to calm yourself down, but George's comments were getting to you.

George was about to unmute himself and get back to the game. "No we dont-"

"GEORGE END THE FUCKING STREAM! This is embarrassing! Talk to me cause you have some explaining to do." You snapped at him.

A silence tell upon you two and he glared at you before turning to his stream and closing it out.

"Okay guys! Go watch the other boys streams I need to go now! Bye!" George quickly ended and turned off everything.

He turned around to you still sitting in his chair. "What? What do you want?"

"Do you know what today is?" You asked.

"April 30th." George answered bluntly.

"Thats all you have to say?" You asked in shock. "It's our anniversary dickhead!"

"I fucking know that." George said.

"You do? So why did you start streaming and we had dinner plans?!"

"I told you we were streaming! You weren't listening to me!" George stood up from his chair when he said that.

"When the fuck did you tell me this?!"

"A couple days ago! You didn't listen!"

"But you knew that was our anniversary! And we made dinnerr plans-"

George yelled over you. "A month ago! We made those plans a month ago so excuse me for forgetting!"

"So all these other years you remembered our anniversary and went out of your fucking way to cancel other plans around that date, but today you didnt because why?!" Tears were threatening to fall down you cheeks, but you wouldnt let him see you like that.

"Because I planned this already with the boys! And AGAIN you werent listening to me when I said that-"

"There were several other times that you could've told me too! But you didn't!" You sniffed trying to keep the frustrated tears inside.

"I already planned this and I cant go back on my promise-"

"But you can with me?!" You yelled and George stopped talking. He's just studying your face at this point and you hated this silence.

"Its not important apparently." You said while walking out of the recording room.

"You're being a bitch." He mumbled.

"Excuse me?! That is so disrespectful!" You spun around yelled at him.

"You already made me feel like shit so might as well finish me off." George said in a annoying tone.

"Yeah you should feel like shit! I feel like shit too so-!" You threw your hands up in exasperation and stormed out the room. You had made it to the door before George called out to you again.

"Y/n! Y/n! Please!"

"No! Just..." You paused before opening the door and ushering your way out. "Call me when you get your shit together.

You were currently curled up on your couch eating leftovers that you had in the refrigerator. That had satisfied your hunger for the night because the dinner was canceled that night. Your anger and sadness had subsided and you were only left with an unusual feeling in your heart. Your relationship felt incomplete, this fight felt incomplete. You didnt break up with him, but you were waiting for closure.

The TV was the only light in the room. It illuminated what it wanted to, you didnt care if it was too dark. Usually you would be cuddled up with George at this ungoldy hour, but you weren't and that made you tear up.

Your sadness was still there, your anger towards George turned into pity. You were sad about the actions he took, but somewhere in your heart you could forgive him. You could forgive and move on if he would come to you.

Speaking of, you had a knock on your door. You didn't have the strength to get up, but you did. Shuffling your way to the door you sluggishly opened it to find George standing there with his hands in his hoodie. The person you wanted to see, but at the same time you wanted to slam that door in his face.

"Hey." George spoke and you gave him a small smile, nothing more.

You turned around to find your seat back on the couch where you were comfortable, but also giving him a silent invitation to come inside. You had sat down on the couch not paying attention to George, but you knew he closed the door, took off his shoes by yours, and put his keys on the table by the door like he always did. It was like a routine to him.

George ended up awkwardly standing beside the couch as you ignored him.

"You know, if you didnt open the door I would've used my keys like you did." George tried to spark up a conversation, but you only hummed in response. You were scared that if you spoke, you would cry.

George ended up making his way to the couch sitting beside you and pulling you into his embrace. Your head was on his chest and you began to sob. You missed this it's only been a few hours, but you had felt that in those few hours you had lost everything. You continued to sob into his hoodie as he rubbed your back and shushed you, whispering sweet nothings into the air only for you to hear.

"Im here, and Im sorry. Im so fucking sorry that I did this to you and I only hope that you can forgive me." George said, his voice cracking a little when he said that. You kept crying.

That's what you wanted to hear all along, that's what you needed. You could forgive him in due time, you always will because you love him, you will always love him. You both can always make it right.

[ushiwakaout]

Boyfriend! Tsuki || Haikyuu!!

Genre: Fluff || Romance ||

Warnings: Manga Spoilers Ahead || Nsfw some where down the line ||

Gender Neutral Reader

Dedicated to @lemmien​ bc he’s a tsuki simp, come get your juice ma’am 

Mans will clown you 24/7

you’re shorter than him no doubt

friends with Tadashi

nicknames in public: shorty, short stack, short stuff, stumpy, midget

nicknames in private: shortcake, peanut, munchkin

YOU CANNOT TELL ME HE DOESN’T HAVE YOU UNDER SHORT CAKE WITH A PINK HEART GRRRRRRRRRRR BARK

You’re not the Karasuno manager, so how’d you guy meet?

You’re in the same class y’all debated on some social construct and he just looked down at your fiestey figure and was like, cute? 

it made him internally gag that he might have feeling for you ,like , hello? he was like no no no no no no NO, you wanna here it in spanish? NOH! english? NO! 

When he consulted Tadashi and it was def that scene with Legosi and Jack: video here

probably avoid you the best he can tbh until he can’t

y’all got assigned together for a project that can’t just be done in class

it was like a whole week thing he had to go to you place or you had to go to his

he refused to let you go to his place but one day he forgets that he made plans with you and lucky you, you ended up snagging his address from Tadashi so you’re at the door, you knock and guy who looks like Tsuki opens the door. He’s equally as tall or maybe more and isn’t wearing glasses

“Oh? Who must you be?” - Akiteru

“Y/N, I’m sorry to intrude but I’m looking for Tsukishima.”

“Y/n? You mean you’re THE y/n? It’s nice to meet you, I’m Akiteru, Kei’s older brother. That kid doesn’t stop talking about you!”

Huh? D-did you just hear him right?

He smiles and tells you to come in, “Kei! You’re girl/boy-friend’s here!”

From his room you could hear a bang, “Ow, shit...” He comes our rubbing his eyes and he’s like “Who are you talking about-” Sees you and it’s like a light bulb light up in his head, “Ah crap, I totally forgot didn’t I?” “What are you doing here?” he pretends like he doesn’t remember.

You’re kinda butt hurt about it “We had plans remember? The project? I was waiting for you at the cafe for like an hour! I looks dumb the whole entire time bc i kept telling the waitress to buzz off since I thought you’d show up, but no, it seems like you had other plans! Anyways, i’m just here to drop this off, I did my part of the project already- If you didn’t want to work together you could’ve just said so instead of letting me humiliate myself.” You shove the half completed project onto his chest and you let yourself out but not before apologizing to Akiteru

Where you crying?

The few droplets of water on the project said yes.

What was this wrenching gut felling?

Did Tsukishima actually fell bad fro making you upset

“Welp, there goes your chance.” 

“Shut up Akiteru.”

Doesn’t stop you from hanging out from Tadashi but if Tsuki ever comes up to y’all, you dash.  

Tadashi lectured him to apologize 

Does he? Not as soon as he should.

I think he finally gave in when you where sitting in Tadashis class eating your lunch and you see him, your fist instinct is to drop what you’re doing and pack up

“Don’t you think this is ridiculous?” He ask you but you don’t answer “I asked you a question.”

Tadashi is surprised when he dropped his things to chase you

“L/N” it’s probably the 5th time he’s called you name and you finally stop

“What? What could you possibly want Tsukishima? To humiliate me again?”

“I want- I want to apologize.” 

you are SHOCKED, Tsukishima Kei, was apologizing to you.

“ I knew I forgot something, and when you came to my house it just clicked. I’m sorry.”

You low key didn’t wanna forgive him... but you where going to humiliate him now

“You’re brother said you talked about me, and he called me your girlfriend/boyfriend... What was that about?” 

He makes that “tch” noise and drags you to a nearby crook, and this mother fucker kisses you. bold. very very bold.

did it turn into a makeout session... yes it did. 

so both of you are blushing when he pulls away, a hot streak of saliva connecting your plump lips, his glasses are kinda foggy.

“This doesn’t mean I forgive you.” You tell him while panting a lil.

THAT’S HOW YALL START DATING

Dates with Tadashi, you really wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Sometimes he feels bad so he hangs out but leaves early so y’all could enjoy your date, he starts picking up a habit of doing it but sometimes it’s just like WHERE U GOING?! THIS ISN’T A DATE

Do you hang out at his house with no intention to actually hang out but just lay in his bed, wearing his clothes

HIS MOM LOVES YOU SO DAMN MUCH, JUST ADORES YOU so when you forget that Tsuki has practice she’s like “no no no, come in, let me feed you plz, you can just hang out in Kei’s room too.”

So sometimes there are days when he comes back from practice and your sprawled on his bed wearing only his shirt and his spare set of headphones 

Will throw a plush dinosoure to catch your attention

“Oh! Welcome home! You’re mama let me in.” 

he’s like ofc she did, bc i wouldn’t have (sure tsuki, sure)

he gets ready for bed, we’ll getting ready to do homework

If you wanna get cuddly, you’re gonna have to pull him away from his homework to sit on him like a baby koala

he doesn’t mind anymore, bc you’ve learned not to sit on his cord and pull his headphones off his head

timeskip tsuki

y’all fight about the stupidest things

Has be made you cry? One to many times 

85% of it was probably while fucking

you mock him so hard when he decides to go pro 

“I thought it was a club kei, I thought you hated volleyball.”

“shut up woman or i’ll shut you up”

challange accepted

you kept mocking him

thank god you’re at home bc you would have been in big trouble if you were in public.

You where just reading some manga on the couch when he’s standing behind you and he tilts your head back, his fingertips digging into your cheeks “You don’t learn do you?” you kinda give him a cheeky smile and chuckle

he gets worked up easily it’s funny to push his buttons

you push his buttons bc if he does get pissed off which is 100% of the time, it just means he’s gonna rail you 

lets add some nsfw

Does Kei fuck you in his Sendai Frogs jersey to break it in... oh hell yes

YOU CANNOT TELL ME THAT THIS MANS DON’T HAVE AN ONLY FANS BUT PEOPLE DON’T KNOW ITS HIM SKDJSFJSJFHJ

 his sub is like 45 dollar a month bc he doesn’t just take pictures, most of his videos are of him fucking you so good. people want to know who you guys are.

when he doesn’t wanna focus on filming, the only thing he’ll post is an audio of you guys fucking and I think people like those a lot better because they can hear your moans and your pleads 

His degrading you half of the time

“You’re such a stupid whore fore my cock aren’t you. You can’t even speak.”

He has his fingers wrapped around your neck while you’re hold your knees to your chest

 you’re a crying sobbing mess and the audio records the way you sob out his name, but it’s always bleeped out, they can only hear your swearing and you’re babbling

will fuck you mating press style if he really wants to fuck your brains out.

he’ll start fucking you so slow, it doesn’t make it better but he’s trying to ease up on you bc as much as he loves it when you cry and plead, he want you to know that he loves you even if he’s calling you names

He start to kiss your forehead, your nose, your wet cheeks and then your lips.

The last few minutes is a distorted audio of him talking to you while he fucks you slowly, He’s repeating the words, “You know i love you right?”

But you’re like “fuck you Kei.” there’s a whine in your voice while he starts to speed up for the last time. in between moans you’re just like “Kei, just cum inside me already, please just- just fill me up already.” 

you’re knees are on his shoulders and he’s riding out both your orgasm and his

and while he does that you’re just like “I fucking hate you, god fuck- oh god, I fucking love you.”

“Do you hate me or do you love me, make up your mind woman.”

“Shut up kei, just kiss me.”

Request Are Open!!!

[mochees]

"𝗱𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗰"

-> headcanons, they do be gettin domestic out here huh 

characters: daichi, sugawara, asahi, bokuto x gn!reader

warnings: SFW & slight NSFW gender-neutral headcannons

wc: 1.2K

a/n: my second ever fan material is dedicated to vanessa and valerie i love u both thank u for being my personal hypewomen this is for u, a little POUR of domesticity <3

Daichi Sawamura

housework is generally split 50/50, but when one of you has had a long day more often than not the other will do more to make it 75/25

is an AMAZING chef

you cant fight me on this he's a whiz in the kitchen

you take turns setting up date night and one of his favourite things to do for you is cook

on weekends he sleeps in and you use it as time to make him breakfast and work on your cooking skills but as soon as he smells it or hears you hes up and on you

he'll stand behind you and wrap himself around you trying to help or guide you in any way he can while simultaneously kissing your head and telling you how much he loves you serving as more of a distraction than praise

after breakfast he'll INSIST on doing the dishes so you have to settle for helping each other before it turns into an all out WAR

avid pet name user likes to call you: honey, sweetie, love, babycakes, and babe

grocery shopping? COUPLES ACTIVITY

BUT ALSO A RACE/COMPETITION TO SEE WHO CAN GET THE PRODUCE AND MEAT/DAIRY THE FASTEST

when everythings been done in the house or you're both just tired he'll lay down on the couch and pull you down with him and you could stay in his arms like that for literal hours especially when he puts a blanket on the two of you and a movie's playing or even if you just straight up nap together 🥺🥺🥺

full on hot and heavy make out sessions

like literally anywhere

this man LOVES you

common knowledge at this point that daichi sawamura is a dom and a kinky MF

is open to trying anything in the bedroom before he makes a final decision

but is also very concerned about your comfort and consent!!! safe respectful sex people !!!!

gives strong dog lover vibes, probably would want to get a big dog with you something like a dalmation, retriever/lab, or german shephard

would absolutely LOVE that dog and you would have to fight the dog over your man before you lose him forever

Asahi Azumane

lisTEN UP Y'ALL CAUSE THIS IS IT the beat that im bangin is delicious 🤪

this MF is SOFT for you

like we already been knew hes a big teddy bear but this man? this man STARES at you 24/7 in absolute AWE

he goddamn LOVES YOU

would probably have proposed like no sooner than a year into your relationship (if marriage is ur thing if not NICE yall cool AF LIVE THAT NO GOVERNMENT INVOLVED LIFESTYLE)

anyway, when you go grocery shopping he will not let you carry any heavy bags. you can carry the bread and like maybe a bag of potatoes but thats it.

also loves to cook for you

hes no whiz in the kitchen but god damn he puts his heart and SOUL into cooking for you

but he loves it when you cook for him because "anything you make is amazing sweetheart"

doesn't use a variety of petnames especially baby and babe because he feels they're too objectifying so he only really uses sweetheart and love

unless you're in the bedroom, then baby and babe are free real estate.

is shy at first but after a few times knows EXACTLY how to treat you RIGHT

definitely wants kids probably 2, MAYBE 3

ideally wants a boy and a girl but oh boy, if he had two girls, spoiled little babies, daddys girls

this man he drinks tea. real men drink TEA.

hes got that earl grey with two teaspoons of sugar vibe goin on

you have multiple TV shows on the go together and you love to sit down at the end of the day or on a free weekend and just straight up BINGE until your eyelids are heavy

afterwards you'll cuddle in bed and fall asleep within minutes and just hold each other all night 🥺🥺🥺

Koushi Sugawara

he BABIES you

like not in a "i view you as incompetent" way but in a just genuine love and affection "my s/o is baby" way

like Asahi, he watches you in awe like you're a newborn baby just developing motor and speech skills

cooking is like a split evenly thing and u both love it just as much when you cook for each other so its not really a huge part of your romance

HOWEVER food COULD be part of your romance ;)

im talking like whipcream maybe some body shots ;) who knows! not you! suga is like johzenji in bed! crazy and a little confused he's unpredictable!

anywho, also enjoys the mundane things like grocery shopping what else do adults do i dont know im only in twelfth grade and i still sleep in until 11

pet names!!! uses!! pet names!!!!! LOVES pet names!!!! honey, sweetheart, love, he likes the more affectionate, mushy ones

although if other guys are flirting with u and he gets jealous he will NOT hesitate to call u babe/baby in front of them

you call him sugar. if you don't you're lying.

he's not super built like some of the other guys but he does still have a bit of muscle obvi, and the best part is because hes not super built he SQUISHY

SO HIS CUDDLES ARE JEJEJEWJ THE BEST

likes to go on walks together as frequently as you can, weather not really dependant and he WILL hold your hand and he WILL kiss it

if its really hot that day on your walk he'll buy you icecream and if its colder probably hot chocolate, or coffee or something

idk why but,,, i feel like he gives the best massages?? like maybe its because he's a setter and he's got those good hands ;) but just,,, i need a suga back rub :((((

Koutarou Bokuto

bokuto drinks his RESPECT MY S/O JUICE DAILY

is BAD AT COOKING DO NOT LET HIM IN THE KITCHEN

your cast iron frying pan will CHIP

he will confuse salt and sugar and probably flour and icing sugar

so just either bokuto-proof your kitchen or put a goddamn steel door with a retinal scanner

suspiciously good at cleaning

like everytime you see him clean your face visibly makes a ???

because this man has approximately no braincells???

what the fuck is he??? a male cinderella????

BUT u dont complain when he does

1, because it helps evenly divide the basic domestic needs of eating and cleaning

and 2, he likes to clean with his shirt off

he does, he likes to make you drool over him, he KNOWS you see him and he will PURPOSELY flex his muscles just to make u squirm

is fucking kinky but you didn't hear that from me

DATE NIGHT DATE NIGHT DATE NIGHT

THRIVES OFF OF DATE NIGHT

LOVES TO HOLD YOUR HAND AND SQUISH YOU AND KISS YOU AND MAKE SURE EVERYONE KNOWS YOU'RE HIS S/O

DOESN'T CARE WHERE YOU GO AS LONG AS HE DOESN'T HAVE TO LET GO OF YOU

AVID baby/babe user

will use love, honey, sweetheart when its soft bokuto hours

babydoll? ah fuck, its free real estate for bokuto the property investor!

this man, this man who drinks his RESPECT juice every day is HEAD OVER HEELS for you

he WORSHIPS you

its definitely also a body worship kink

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© surrealsakura, 2020

do not repost, copy, or claim.

[fandomsandfeminism]

Just so yall know, I’m going to hold off talking more about End Game until, like, Monday probably? So I’ll just give an overview here.

I’m going on a camping trip this weekend, and I plan on watching the movie a second time on Monday evening. So I’ll percolate on my thoughts until then. 

Here’s just a my initial spoiler spoiler spoiler thoughts below the cut:

Most of my “complaints” are that the characters I wanted to see more of didn’t get much time (Carol and Valkyrie mostly) but they are newcomers to the franchise or had been snapped, and this movie REALLY wanted to focus on the original 6 Avengers. Which, ya know, even with 3 hours, ya gotta make choices. 

I really feel like the Russos failed to think about what effect losing 50% of the population would do to like...basic infrastructure and modern economies beyond “well, people are sad.” Like, how is there still fast food restaurants? Electricity? Therapy groups? We know that when plague or famine or war cause a huge disruption in population, things can escalate quickly. We know that not having enough people to fill the needed workload can have a huge strain of the economy. It just seems...ill thought out. Like just the drop in the work force should cause huge problems in just keeping things....running, but everything just seems fine? And with Steve’s line about seeing the Whales. I dunno. It just feels like the movie is saying “Well, Thanos WAS right. But everyone is sad now.” Instead of actually like, rebuking Malthusian Eugenics as a core concept. Which. Bleg, 

I’m mad about Natasha. Not just on the level of “oh, great, they killed the only original female Avenger. Thanks” but also because the movie either forgot or failed utterly to explain why Nebula didn’t say like “hey, so about the Soul Stone.” She KNOWS what Thanos did to get it, she’s there when teams were picked. Did she intentionally have 2 characters who love each other go on that specific mission because she knew and she made a choice to set them up for sacrifice? (If so, this is in no way conveyed to the audience) Or did the writers just....not think about it and put Clint and Nat there because it was narratively convenient? Either way, poorly written. 

I really liked Tony and Steve in this movie. I actually believed that they were friends. I thought both of their endings were done really well, and I’m excited to see Sam as Cap in future movies. I know a lot of people are sad or upset about their various ending but.....they worked for me. 

I’m annoyed with Thor’s whole arc in this movie. I hate that it could have been really good and serious and heart wrenching, but it’s too filled with fat jokes to commit to that. Lazy. 

Rocket was entertaining the entire movie. Clint was...I dunno. Clint, I guess. My opinion on him is still very neutral. Scott too. Hulk too. They were all....fine. 

I liked Nebula’s arc a lot. She’s always been a cool character. Her interactions with Gamora were great. 

I felt that Carol was under utilized, but I LOVE HER HAIR CUT OH MY GOD. -Fans self- Also, that bit in the final battle where it’s like...EVERY lady hero fighting along side Carol, like...I don’t know if yall are intentionally hinting at A Force, but I enjoyed it. 

There’s just a lot of nice moments in this. Tony and his dad. Thor and his mom. Cap fighting himself. The time heist was the best part of the movie.  Sad we didn’t see more Loki. Very amused I was right about Carol saving Tony in space. Loved Pepper’s Rescue armor. 

Yeah. Overall, I’m still feeling very positive about the movie. There’s a few big things that bug me (Nat and Thor being the most obvious, with Nat being the real thorn in my boot.) And ya know, with sooooo much build up and so many characters, I’m not sure the movie could have been much better unless I personally and specifically got to sit down and write it. lolol. No movie can be perfect. 

But yeah. I’m going to percolate on this for the weekend. View it again on Monday. You can probably expect some Youtube Videos about this in the near future. 

But yes. Those are my thoughts as of right now.

[beihonglin]

anyway i met bei honglin and he’s an actual angel and we don’t deserve him: a recap

also this is more than 5k words so like ! prepare yourselves!

fhdjjd okay so in april honglin’s hyh brought up his birthday party in his gc and I was like :——) that’s when spring sem ends I could actually make it

 fast forward through a lot of encouraging by summer miss @91percentchaoze​ (sobs I rly owe summer my life) and a lot of anxiety about flights and a lot of other stresses in between

and June 2nd I’m in shanghai with mirthe miss @honglinsmacaroni​ and meggi and summer ie three of the cutest people in the world!!!

when we get to banana there were already other fans there waiting at the event space and the hyh was giving out seat numbers and stuff

so meggi was 10, summer was 11, mirthe was 14 and I was 15

and we started giving out the slogans and stuff we printed until the staff chased us out so they could set up

and so we were chilling first in Starbucks w the other fans fhdjjfjf they’re rly so cute I was finally able to put faces to weibo handles & they finally realised they were talking to someone who’s actually shit at speaking Chinese lmao

then when it got to 2 o’clock we moved outside near the entrance of the event space (since the event space was supposed to be open to us at 2)

but they got the time wrong and we ended up only being able to go in at nearly 3

which isn’t important anyway bc !!! we saw tangram walking in !!!

okay so we saw this white blob coming out from the main banana building and walking towards one of the side buildings and we were like

whomst

and it wAS JINGZUO JSDKAHFKJDH

and summer or mirthe waved at him and he was like bitch wtf and squinted

like ??? who the heckity is waving at me but then eventually he connected the dots and was like o yah fans so he waved back fhdchdkhcjdjf

and he just walked on what a king ??????

summer was right I was surprisingly more chill than I thought I would be fhdjfjfjjf I thought I would cry but I didn’t

so we waited around a bit longer, got suntans and sunburns and slightly dehydrated

and then honglin walks out

my god y’all he’s a whole goddamn angel he’s not real I’m telling you he’s unreal

I KNOW I said the last time that yanjun is rly unphotogenic and all the photos don’t do him justice but leT ME TELL YOU

THE ENTIRE BANANA FAMILY IS LIKE THIS THEYRE UNREAL

THEYRE ALL BANANA PEELS IN HUMAN SUITS THEIR VISUALS ARE ??? NOT HUMAN

but yah at first I was like o he’s gonna go through the back exit to the event space he’s not gonna come this way

AND THEN HE CAME THIS WAY

fhdjfjfj i didn’t take a video but if I did u would probs hear me go “o shit he’s coming” fhdjfjfj

and mirthe was like I’M GONNA TELL HIM UR WEIBO HANDLE I’M GONNA TELL HIM YOU’RE ASTROFIREWORKS and I was like NO so then we had a little back and forth for a while tHAT HONGLIN SAW FBDJHFJF

I don’t rmb a lot of it bc I was mainly in shock that he was in front of me so I was mostly like :——) heckie!

but he went through the front entrance and the moment he made it inside I lost my shit fbdjfjjff

mirthe sent a picture of me just kneeling at the entrance contemplating my entire life to the group chat fhdjfhdj apparently I said that I wanted to go home fhdjfjfjjf

and then zhixie and jingzuo came out soBS

ZHIXIE IS SO BEAUTIFUL IRL U DONT UNDERSTAND HIS CHEEKBONES ARE INSANE

also he had black hair again and the cuTEST HAT ON and we promptly lost our shit

Jingzuo,,,,, in a plain white shirt and blue jeans and converse,,,, someone PLEASE stop him

but they went in and we cried

and waited outside bc ruotian and chaoze still hadn’t gone in but then someone came to tell us chaoze was off filming for his show so he wasn’t coming & somehow ruotian had alr made it into the building without us noticing so eventually we all went in

and the chairs were so comfortable o my god they swivelled and they were like super squishy I love chairs

and then the best two hours of my tgm stan life started :—(

my god the moment honglin stepped on stage my entire heart melted he rly looked so good sobs

you’re completely right I’m dedicating an entire portion to his visuals

his eyes :—-( are so sparkly my god

and when he smiles his eyesmile???? he gets those rly deep wrinkles around his eyes and they’re actually beautiful????? ;;;;

he Radiates joy like i know i say this so often but their debut song??? radiant??? written For him,,,

also when he smiles it’s so warm like you find yourself smiling along bc he rly and genuinely means it and is happy and your heart just warms up bc he’s happy and i just

man i l*ve him

okay so the first segment zhixie was like “what do y’all love about beibei”

and everyone was yelling different things like “he’s so handsome” and “so talented” and “his vocals” and someone also yelled “he can eat a lot” and zhixie was like ??? bro whAt

also someone said “he spoils his fans a lot” and my god y’all it’s so so true but more in that at the very end of this recap

I couldn’t even say anything rip bc my entire brain was set in English and I was like ???? my god i wrote an entire post about the reasons I l*ve him but my mind is blankity blank

but then he was like well beibei’s great at pick up lines

so he did pick up lines based on scenarios zhixie gave fhdjfjfand most of them were old tsk

but he made up this rly cute one that went like 看花开不如看着你发呆 ‘people like looking at flowers bloom, but i’d rather look at you daydreaming’ and i UWUED SO HARD

and I didn’t realise this until meggi pointed it out after but when they put the scenarios on screen, they used a gender neutral “TA” instead of the gendered 她/他 ;;;;;

then they did this segment where honglin was supposed to go against three fans and do a tongue twister in the shortest time and in order of time they got to choose foods under cloches

honglin did so badly fhdjfjfj he got last place but idk if he did it on purpose so his fans could win

one fan got wasabi disguised as ice cream and zhixie was like EAT IT and honglin was like DONT

and he offered to eat the wasabi for her I’m sobbing he rly is so sweet

but zhixie was like NO SHE HAS TO EAT IT and everyone laughed bc he was so adamant fhdjfjfj i love zhixie with my entire soul

and thEN honglin goes okay y’all know how I posted that picture last night

(this picture)

my god I died when he posted it bc

1) I love that shirt what an expensive look

2) he was baking ;A;

and he made a half-baked cheesecake s o b s

he was like: “since i’m always posting vlogs and y’all always watch me eat I thought I’d make food for y’all this time” and I WEPT

and he was like oh give me a theme and i’ll decorate the cake around that theme

so they pulled out the box again and he picked random numbers

and they called out 4 and 15 and 27 to go on stage and I was like

wow I wonder who they are omg

and suddenly summer’s in my ear going MY GOD 15 IT’S YOU

me:

me: what

zhixie: STOP DREAMING IT’S YOU

me: WHAT

hdsflgkjhdfkhgjdsfgkhksfgkdjhdfgkjhsdgjh

and the entire time i was mouthing to mirf and meggi like I CAN’T SPEAK CHINESE I’M GOING TO GO UP AND FORGET THAT I’M BILINGUAL I’M GOING TO BE BYELINGUAL I’M

and they were mouthing back sPEAK ENGLISH and i was like oK

and then it was my turn and i was shaking so so so hard ????

like i’m so so so bad in front of crowds i’ve shaken my way through every marketing presentation ever bc i hATE public speaking and now i have to go up in front of two angels?????

mirf and meggi were like THAT’S ASTROFIREWORKS and i didn’t realise until i checked the group chat after that zhixie said yAY KJDHSKSJAHKJA

and summer was like SHE FLEW IN FROM NEW YORK kjdshfkahdgjfhagjd

and zhixie was like wait do u speak chinese

and i blANKED OUT I WAS LIKE YES BUT FAM NO

but he only took the yes and was like ok thaNK GOD I DONT HAVE TO TRANSLATE

inside i was like fAM WHO THE HECKITY DO U THINK TRANSLATES YOUR VIDEOS I CAN DO IT FOR U KASJDHFLSKJDHKH but outside i was just ah yes :—)

and zhixie and honglin said something about english but my mind was blank all i could do was stare at honglin like

y’all

i know i said he was unreal but

up close

he’s literally ??? a whole angel like ????????????? his eyes sparkle so much when he laughs my heart STOPPED

and when they asked me to step closer i was like

actually i can translate for u i’m-

and zhixie was like NO THERE’S NO NEED like akdsfhkjkjdshJKASDHK OK

then honglin asked what theme i wanted and i was likE FAM IDK I’VE BEEN BLANKING THE ENTIRE TIME STARING AT YOU

so i was like okay i know u rly like one piece so something maybe one piece related

and he was like fam that’s difficult sadjkfhalsKJSDHLKJASD

but the moment i opened my mouth

zhixie: ARE YOU SINGAPOREAN OR MALAYSIAN

me: uh i’m singapor-

honglin: uwu i can hear it

me: about to die

zhixie (in english): ur accent !

and god yall my entire heart burst into flames like

i’ve said it before here but i’ve spent quite a bit of time being ashamed of my accent bc when i first got to america nobody could understand my singaporean accent and everyone kept asking me to repeat myself and eventually i was like ok u know what it’s better if i just shut up and not talk

and so the reason why i’m so so so proud of zhangjing (and jj) is bc there finally is ?? some south east asian representation and there are even people complimenting his accent and calling it cute and it ?? finally felt like i shouldn’t be embarrassed about the way i speak??

zhixie: when i heard you i was like eh? it’s almost like i heard you zhangjing

and i

Cried

and then zhixie turned to meggi and mirthe and were like yall come from beijing?

like fam what

and meggi was like no we come from belgium

zhixie: malaysian? you?

about ten people correcting him: belgium

zhixie, again: malaysian?

kajsdhflasjdkhfkj

and then zhixie said some other words but yall i was

just watching honglin

his hands are so so so so beautiful like his fingers are rly nice and

his nose ??? work of art

also his hands looked so soft like :—(

he was just bent over the cake and he :—( rly truly a goddamn angel

summer took photos of me that i’m never releasing ever sakdfhaksjdhfds i look so COMPLETELY WHIPPED FOR HIM LIKE

and at one point he started plucking cherries and one stalk fell on the floor and i was like o no so i went forward to pick it up and he

looked up

and said ‘oh it’s okay’ and smiled and

my heart stopped i think i left my soul on stage

O SHIT OKAY AND THEN ZHIXIE WALKED OVER AND WAS LIKE

CAN I ASK WHAT YOU’RE THINKING U LOOK LIKE YOU’RE LOSING UR MIND

AND I WAS LIKE FAM U DONT UNDERSTAND I A M

and i was like ‘idk i’m just ?? very shookt’

and zhixie was like what??? shy????

me: 很惊讶 (very shocked)

zhixie: shy? ? ??

me, thinking: fam this is how i feel when i translate yall captionless vlogs

zhixie (in eng): is this ur first time seeing honglin?

me: my first time seeing you also !!!!!

zhixie, suddenly shy: ah okay thank u

UWU!!!

and then honglin was done and looked up and i might have died inside again

AND HE WALKED OVER AND I WAS LIKE FAM NO DONT IF YOU COME CLOSER I’M LITERALLY GOING TO DI E??????

and he was like ‘oh this is zoro’

the sane part of me: oh wait ur favourite character is zoro???

bc liTERALLY TWO DAYS BEFORE HE POSTED ABOUT SANJI AND SO MY SISTER AND I WERE LIKE OH HE PROBS LIKES SANJI

BUT HE

LIKES ZORO

(my sister, afterwards: wtf i feel lied to)

but he was so heckin close to me like fam my heart

stopped

honglin: i hope u like it uwu

me: heck !

honglin: take one bite!

me: HECKITYHECK

zhixie (in eng): i wanna see ur facial expression

aND THEN THEY WERE BOTH LOOKGIN AT ME LIKE FUCABJS,BCD

FUCINADJCNSAKJDKJ

honglin: is it okay? ;;

me: FUCIJNSKCSADJ YES TAKE MY HEART TAKE MY SOUL

and i finally FINALLY FUNIAJKNSSK FINALLY GOT OFF THE GODDAMN STAGE

zhixie: WHERE’S HER APPLAUSE

anD EITHER RUOTIAN OR JINGZUO UPSTAIRS STARTED CLAPPING AGAINST THEIR MIC LIKE ASDFAHKSDHFAKSJD SHUT UP

 AND I WANTED TO DIE I WALKED ITNO A CARDBOARD CUTOUT RIGHT AFTER BC I WAS SO SHOOK

and honglin was like be careful! there’s a cardboard cutout right there! bc he’s a whoLE ANGEL

but also like GKASCKASHDHFAJDSHLFKJ PLS STOP LOOKIGN AT ME PLEAS E MY HEART IS WEAK I’M

my god

collapsed into summer’s arms right after thank god for summer !!!

okay then the next segment zhixie was like o yall know honglin’s position in the group is main vocal so next he can sing something for yall

honglin: actually i prepared an entire song for yall but music copyright means that i can’t sing it w a backing track

bc if he sings w a copyrighted backing track or if he sings more than half the song the livestream video would have to be taken down or something??

but it didn’t matter bc the moment he opened his mouth my entire heart STOPPED like

if he stabbed me in the stomach it would have hurt less his voice is so so sososos ososososososoosososo beautiful ????

and he sang without a backing track to like ????

i’m telling yall he’s a whole angel like he’s not real

and then honglin was like oh i also prepared another song but bc i now see there are overseas fans here i’m gonna sing an english song

and he sang when i was your man by bruno mars and when he hit the high note i think i ascended into the afterlife

about the 46 minute mark here i RLY AND TRULY RECOMMEND LISTENING TO IT SOBS HE SOUNDS LIKE THE PERFECT ANGEL HE IS

AND ZHIXIE HARMONISED AT THE BACK LIKE AHHHHH THAT’S MY BABE MAIN VOCAL TAGTEAM RIGHT THERE

and then zhixie asked if there was any other song we wanted and i was immediately like JJ!!

i’ve been ??? pleading for a jj cover forEVER ND HE

FINALLY PULLED THROUGH

honglin: i’m going to do Those Were The Days bc like the song says (那些你很冒险的梦 我陪你去疯 - all those adventurous dreams, i’ll chase them with you), i’ve been chasing my dream and yall have been here with me every step of the way

and i think the moment he said it i DIED like ???? jj is one of my favourite singers and nearly all my faves have covered his songs at least once, astro included???

and everyone who knows me knows i love jj like nini miss @tanqram​ has literally made a tangram singing jj compilation that i watch religiously ??? and this is one of my fave jj songs?????

and the moment he opened his mouth like ???? i KNOW i said that i died the last two times he sang but

firstly he sounds so much like jj?????

and secondly everything was ???? perfect??????

like i judge jj covers hard bc i’ve listened to the originals so many times everything is ingrained and the moment something is off i cringe but

yall

honglin’s perfect honglin is Actually Perfect

ALSO HE SOUNDS SO MUCH LIKE JJ LIKE HE RLY WASN’T LYING IN HIS IP INTRODUCTION

and afterwards honglin was like lol jj said before that whenever he sings high notes he starts sweating and immediately jingzuo (???) was like TAKE OFF UR CLOTHES LKAJDHSFKASJDHFK

jingzuo chaotic good!!!

also i didn’t know until afterwards when the fantakens were out but ruotian was eating chicken wings and slurping noodles the whole time upstairs aksjdflhaksdjfhaksj why is didi line chaos

and then zhixie was like yall know what other things beibei is good at?

like fam he’s good at everything we rly can’t

also someone in the back was like he’S GREAT AT DOING THE SPLITS and honglin’S FACE AJSDFHKSJDHF

but it was languages and so zhixie was like we’re gonna make him say i love u in many different languages

and i could FEEL marta miss @honeyforzhixie​ going ????? isn’t that ur thing zhixie jsdgflasjdhf

and so they started discussing languages and zhixie was like o i know u can speak a little japanese bc i know u memorised the entire one piece theme song

and i SCREAMED INSIDE bc we literally juST TALKED ABOUT IT THAT MORNING WHEN WE VIDEO CALLED NINI nkfhakjsdhf we were like uwu we hope he sings a jj song but then we were like o lol what if he ended up singing the one piece theme song instead bc we bet he knew the whoLE THING AND HE DOES KNOW IT AJSDFHLAK

but then zhixie made honglin imitate maotong and say ‘i love u’ the way maotong would and my heart ached a little i miss my baby boy so much ??

but JINGZUO CHAOTIC GOOD JSDHLAKJ ‘could u imitate chaoze too’ jaskdlfhkjd

and so he did a couple different versions like Japanese (he and jingzuo screamed lines from one piece at each other ajdkhflksd) and korean (he took a line out of some korean drama?????)

and someone suggested french (was it mirf?????) and i lAUGHED rip his french vlog sorry honglin i swear i love u !!

and then they were like ok time to play his fan video

okay listen i have to preface this by saying that when i got the brief from the hyh she told me ‘it’s best if we make him cry!’ and i was like ok! sure!

turns out it made ME cry i stressed out over the video for two entire weeks sobs the moment my finals were over i locked myself into nyu’s computer lab until moving out day but still couldn’t finish it so i had to work on it on the plane ride home too sobs my roommate connie miss @ynajun​ saw the worst of it bc every time i came home from the lab i’d stress about it ???

but my god it was worth ??? everything ????

he ?????? cried??????

and like on one hand i’m happy that i managed to fulfil the brief but also i feel bad bc he cried but also mostly i laughed bc he’s such a sweet emotional bub

BUT ALSO BC HE CRIED MEGGI GOT TO OFFER HIM HER TISSUES!!!!!!!!

like we specially bought tissues before we left for banana bc we were like we’re gonna need them bc we’re gonna cry

BUT IT TURNS OUT HONGLIN NEEDED HTEM MORE AJSDKFHLASJDHFKAJ

zhixie: he cries every year during his birthday

zhixie: but also even when it’s not his birthday he cries he cried at my birthday too

and afterwards in chaoze’s birthday post he called honglin a crybaby too UWUWUWUWU

tangent but on his birthday when he came into the group chat he thanked us again for the video and i Died

okay this next part is purely speculation bc i honestly might just be overinflating myself and he might have done this purely coincidentally but when he thanked us for his video he looked at me and i ?????

when the video was playing nini and marta were yelling in the gc that they knew the video was done by me bc i overuse cc particle world on after effects jasdhlfksjdh but in that moment i briefly entertained the thought that he was familiar enough with my edits to know that the only idiot who keeps using cc particle world was me ??

but also as i said purely speculation and probably coincidence so

anyway you can watch it here 

and then they played the birthday video messages from fans and i think i died from embarrassment let’s Not talk about it

but also i only realised it after they pointed it out in the gc but apparently zhixie and honglin were both singing along to the jj backing track i added to my video ajsdfhlaksjd

my god another tangent but on his birthday when he came into the group chat we were talking about the videos we recorded

and hh (one of honglin’s og fans she’s a whole angel too I love her !!!!) was like my gOD i rly am so unphotogenic (when she filmed her video she put a ‘FAT’ over her face sobs but like mood) and i was like yah same lol i had to record myself like ten times in times square bc i looked so bad in all the takes

and honglin was like HH WHY DID U CENSOR UR FACE UR CLEARLY SO CUTE and we collectively died for her uwu !!!!

then honglin rePLIED ME SAYING ‘OH BUT TIMES SQUARE HAS SUCH A GOOD VIBE’ and i died for the nth time ??? and then he followed up by saying ‘i rly want to go to times square i’ve gone to america a lot of times when i was younger but i’ve only ever been to the west coast’ jksadhlfkjshekj pls come i’ll bring u around east coast best coast

but back to the point he was like ‘i’ve said it before during ip (and he did!!! during the fanfan episode where he was talking to the rubbish bin he rly has said it before!!!!) but i rly try my best to remember every single person’s face and all my fan’s weibo IDs’ and my heART MELTED HE

and then it was his ending ment!!

he said something that rly threw my heart off a cliff he said that he’s so grateful for the hyh and fans for listening to him and donating to charities in his name instead of buying him extravagant gifts bc when he makes it big, if he makes it big, the thing he wants to do the most is to donate to children who come from a less privileged family background bc he knows what it’s like coming from a single parent family and ;n;

then they showed wishes from other idols!!!!!

there was wang ziyi, zhou rui, the twins my ip hEART

LISTEN I ??? when zuo qibo showed up my SWIN HEART EXPLODED I ??? MISS ??? MY SWIN ANGELS ????

AND THEN RUIBIN SHOWED UP IN ALL HIS UNKEMPT AND UNSHAVEN AND RAMBLING GLORY AND MY PRINCERUIBIN HEART WEPT I THINK I HELD SUMMER’S ARM SO HARD SHE GOT BRUISES AJKSDHFKSJD I’M SO SORRY SUMMER I LOVE U

and then cHAOZE APPEARED !!!! and everyone immediately melted he’s the softest leader alive i love my baby!!

and honglin was about to say something but ruOTIAN

ruotian showed up w a cake w sparklers???????? like fam???????

and eventually we had to say goodbye :—(

but honglin was like o i rly and truly thought that there would be lesser people at this birthday than there was last year and my heart ??? broke ????

bc the room they were in last year alr was so small and there were rly little roses but he ??? genuinely thought he had so little fans that he wouldn’t even fill up the room ;;;;;;;; bc there rly are v little active roses both on weibo like there are less than ten of us who actively post in his chaohua and at tgm events like they’re mostly lrt/jjz fans and there’s usually only one rose ;;;;

but listen honglin our entire gc would die for you we will never stop loving u until every last one of us is found dead in a ditch

and then we’ll love u into the next life

also after he said goodbye he was like sike!

he kept singing behind the cardboard cutouts and peeking around them to say hi again

at some point I poked my head over and went PLS COME TO NEW YORK and he said something back that I alas couldn’t hear rip

and then he started singing along to jj again sobs

but eventually at some point they left via the back door and I was like GOTTA GO THIS IS LITERALLY WHAT I’VE BEEN TRAINING FOR sobs going to the airport for yanjun and wenjun and jeffrey and ziyi and kunkun rly was to prepare me for one thing and one thing only and it was to practise getting good non-shaky fantakens without dying???

jingzuo rly truly looked AMAZING he rly rocks the white tee blue jeans and converse look jingzuo stans stay winning!!!

and honglin ;;;;;;; was holding my banner ;;;;;;;;

and he looked directly into my camera a couple times sobs and he shot hearts too I rly ???? Editing the photos made me cry so many times fbdjhfjf every time I got to those photos I lose my mind

ALSO ONLY AFTER EDITING THE PHOTOS I REALISED RUOTIAN WAS JUDGING ME SO HARD GHDJFJ my eyes were glued to honglin the entire time but looking at the photos again ruotian looked so unamused fhcjfhfbfhbf

speaking of ruotian my gOD editing photos with him in it is a nightmare y’all he’s either blinking or looks like he’s about to sneeze in nearly every picture fhdjfjfj summer and I generally make it a rule not to blur other members’ faces out of our fantakens but ruOTIAN RLY TESTING ME

but we made it to the banana lobby and I didn’t want to follow them and their fansites in so I stopped walking and honglin turned back to wave at me ;;;;;;;;;;;;;; and i think i died again

and so I went back to the event space where summer and mirthe and meggi were waiting and sat down and blanked out sobs

but it diDNT END THERE FHDJFJJF FOR SOME REASON HONGLIN DECIDED TO WALK OUT AGAIN A BIT AFTER

so mirthe and I were like omg gotta blAST so we speedwalked over

and he :—-( saw and shot signs at my camera again fhdjfjfjjf I ???

and then it was Actually Over god I was a shell of a person after that

still am tbh I’m not sure how I survived sorting through our 2000+ fantakens fhdjfjfj

but I’m so spoiled y’all I’m really truly so spoiled by him :—(

like I said earlier he rly spoils his fans so much????

that night he posted on Instagram and immediately summer and meggi and mirthe and I commented and he replied all four of us ;n;

earlier on in spring semester there was a third party event that Tangram was invited to but the organiser was a MESS and tgm wasn’t treated very well??? but honglin was worried that the fans who travelled to the event and didn’t get to see them were upset so he came into the group chat to console them ;;;;;

and I was talking to another fan and she said that even during other events he kept turning around to wave at the fans and acknowledge them and it’s ;;;;;; as someone who has ?? waited in the rain / stood for hours waiting for idols something as simple as a nod or a smile rly warms u up and makes the wind and cold worth it ;;;; and he makes sure to do it all the time ;;;;;;;;;

on his birthday !! his birthday !! when he was in Taiwan and should be resting and enjoying time w his mum and not thinking about us !!!! he still came into the group chat for an hour and talked to us ;;;;;;

and he named all his sort of more well known fans’ IDs, even the ones who weren’t online and sending messages at the time ;;;;; like he rly wasn’t lying when he said he remembers us ;;;;

also fhdjfjfjjf god I’m so spoiled he replied me so many times ?? like there was the times sq thing and the east coast thing ???

and when he said he was training for the next archery competition I was like “o are u shooting recurve or compound this time?” and he was like “o idk if I shot recurve or compound but it’s the one I shot the last time” and I fhdjfjfjfhfb

tangential but 1) my god y’all his form is beautiful my archery heart: exploded

2) his rhotics are so beautiful too my phonology heart: also exploded

also when he was about to leave the gc I was like “huh but u just got here, why are you leaving?” and he sent another voice message “astrofireworks, why are you becoming shameless too, when did I just get here, I’ve clearly been here for a long time already” fhdjfjdjfn fhdjjd

also my GOD He was reading some IDs and summer and lyla were like what about @astrofireworks and I was like fchjfbhjdf y’all it’s ok he’s alr said it in another voice message two months ago in the gc I’m alr so spoiled I ???? rly shouldn’t ask anything else of him or he’s going to hate me

but then he

sent

a whole

nine second message

“hey astrofireworks, I hope one day I can go to New York and maybe... I’ll meet you there, okay?”

and I ??,?? Sobbed

ndjdbfjvcchhxhdhfh

and then Connie went to send him off at the airport in Taiwan the next day and ????? 

I’m not gonna say much because it’s rly conno’s story to tell and I’m not sure how much I’m allowed to say outside the gc but he rly spoils his fans so so so so much ????

anyway bei honglin rly and truly is the sweetest boy on earth we rly don’t deserve him ;;;;; this first week of June truly has been the best week of my cpop stan life and i ????? love mister bei honglin with my entire heart and soul ;;;;;;;;;;;;

[mikkock]

HELLO I ADORE YOUR OCS SO MUCH WILL YOU TELL ME ABOUT KAI HE LOOKS LIKE A TOTAL "YOUR DAUGHTER CALLS ME DADDY TOO" DOUCHEBAG AND I FUCKING LOVE HIM AND WANNA KNOW MORE ABOUT HIM

LBLMVBGK THANK U OMG love it when ppl like my kids, im a proud dad rn

ALSO wrow congrats on ur on point analysis, cause, that’s the Essence Of His Being (fun fact since i got two characters who go by the name of kai -cause fuck that basic writing tip that says ‘dont have two characters named the same thing- i usually refer to him as The Bad Kai cuz he a bad bitch)

so lets unwrap that dude shall we uwu 

SO this dude was created when i realised my story didnt have antagonists so i made a bunch of Bad People and then they all became good people after i started giving them more personnality somehow eXCEPt him for some reason, the only survivor of the “everyone will be baby” plague, the only rude bitch in this house, the only guy who’s still on the dark grey side of morally grey...but tbh im in love with him cause he’s an asshole and im an idiot so like.

His base concept was basically something along the lines of “fuckboy but make it Couture”, like douchebag indeed But Gotta Be Fancy at being one, gotta add a pinch of Sneaky Bitch in the pot. His aesthetic is Chillin, gettin in ur pants, then moving on for some more chillin and more pants. So if you’re into some funky sexy time with no pressure and no ties, ya gon get along, your goals meet, time to have fun.

All that is supported by his charisma, cause unless ya got some nasty history, he’ll just look like that charming bad-boy “oho hot dude with a dangerous but not agressive” vibed person, and he’s quite a sweet-talker. He’s probs not only the ‘your daughter calls me daddy’ kind but also ‘and so will YOU, i’m scoring with the whole family and you wont stop me (and you wont WANT to stop me)’ 

He got that handsome ppl priviledge ya feel

but also, he wouldnt be a rude guy if he was just the ‘i enjoy chill frick-fracking and im just so sexy that no one can say no to that booty’ guy

Dude got quiiite some spite-fueled ego and Does Not Take losing well, and will not, in fact, let himself lose on any objective he has, and when that objective is A Person, he gets ugly. Being good at sweet talking also means being good at small stuff like “not saying exactly the truth always when it would be more beneficial not to”, “deliberately using euphemistic, ambiguous or obscure language so to mask wrong doings and technically saying the truth but in such a way that it becomes completely masked by a thick fog of bullshit”, and “use words and behaviour in general to influence others unscrupulously so to get something in return”. Even a little “playing with their perception in order to make them doubt in their thoughts and selves”. In short dude got no qualms about using all the tools of manipulation available if it means that he comes on top (or on bottom if the goal was getting an assful eeeeeey we’re masters of comedy here) It tends to be all for short term results tho, so not much your ‘boyfriend who convinces you you’re nothing without him” and more of a “you thought you were dating but only you were thinking that as he always kept it just vague enough to have you not official yet convinced of his and now you’re blaming yourself for believing you were together”

master of getting ass, also master of Ugly Ass Breakups, and master of suddenly dissapearing from your life so hard that you wonder if it was just your imagination all along (he got ugly past with a bunch of other ocs especially he’s ex boyfriend with two that are now together cause i dig that sort of drama the sAME dUDe gave u the trust issues that held u from going full lovey dovey ? i fucking lIVE off that kinda shit wait until he pops back like ‘oho hello fancy seeing YOU TWO here my two fave exes together incredible what a small world”)

Though I have to rework on all that cause that backstory is oLD AS SHIT (like prolly i built it in what, 2016? ew ugly) I had that stem from some sort of neglect-fueled inferiority complex. I had given him a kinda cold family with a bunch of siblings who got Way More Nurtured due to their respective talents and achievements, having him left behind and feeling like he got nothing. SO that’s basically the explanation as of today but i dont like iiiiit anymooooore so I’ll have to work on it to make it something i dig, cause idk, bitch feels flat so far.

BUT i do intend on keeping the whole concept of ~Loneliness~, and of him working alone and quite hard for anything he gets. And the general need of proving himself that had come from the WIP backstory. I don’t exactly see him as an overachiever at all, but definitly as an obstinate and persevering hardworking guy, because “Look YALL I WAS aBLE TO DO THIS YALL THOUGHT I COULDNT HUH YALL LOOK DOWN ON ME well fuck u cause idc im better than u now also ur mum’s into bondage i kno from experience bye”. So tbh pair up with him for group projects, you’ll be sure his share of the work will be done (but also if you dont do yours then he’s probably going to be a bITCh about it, no remorse in leaving blank slides in the middle of the powerpoint and then loudly proclaiming ‘OH RIGHT This was supposed to be Kevin’s part but I suppose he never sent it to me, despite the numerous reminders i sent him, no big deal, no hard feelings, its ok sweetie we all sometimes feel too lazy i forgive u :)” )

Also he’d be Chill to hang out with for like, parties, nights out at the bar, that kinda shit. He definetly has some beans to spill about quite some people, he gathers the goss as he gathers lovers (i was gonna end that in “as he spreads legs” but it sounded too PG-18 for this good Well Behaved family friendly blog) and Will Not stay tight lipped, and Will be a bitch when trashtalking people, and It Will Be Entertaining as it always is when you’re hearing about crazy exes and you’ve had some beers. 

Now trivia that idk where else to write cause idk i stupid or more like disorganised :

- he digs red ale beer like if ya wanna win him over with the appropriate alcohol offer there u go

- he’s a fake blonde (cause my hobby is painting regrowth roots on hair)

- his design is a mixture of those 3dgy denim boys u see on pinterest and the specific brand of fuckboys that are french-L-section-chic-grunge-hipster-fuckboys (L section is like a branch of highschool)(that word combo is a so specific kinda guy)(its kinda like a softboi but more arrogant but in a lowkey way)(also they rich)(but he’s not rich so guess that should make him Less Arrogant)

-im constantly dead afraid of giving him more characteristics and story or whatveer cause he’s the only meanie i got left and i do Not want him to stop being an asshole but everytime i develop a character they end up nice or redeemed or whatever and i wanna keep him a bitch so i neglect him (just like his parents in his 2016 version wow)

he smokes (prolly started quite early to Be Kool and now relies on it for stress relief)

he’s outspoken and extraverted and prolly the guy who had a lot to say when you were doing debates in class (there’s always that person who has a Lot to argument about)(its him) but outside of a Set and Defined debate structure he probably doesnt give his mind voraciously 

he’s a law student and despite saying he’s the one bad guy left he probably wont be a corrupt lawyer or judge or whatever like come on he will do his job properly he worked hARD FOR THIS justice may be served

he’s not the kind to openly hate or even dislike anyone cause what’s the point of wasting your energy on that? its much funnier to him to be obnoxiously Neutral with someone and basically ignore them but still strike them with some Spikes of passive-agressive comments, let them be Mad at your calmness

he’s 177cm tall (that’s like 5.8 according to google)

honestly if you’re bros with him he’s fun to be with the being a jerk is completly coincidental 

he probably ranks high in the list of “those criminals who steal big lighters from their friends” 

i think at a point his design had tattoos but i forgot the designs of those so now he doesnt anymore

a dog person

i think ive run out of facts (or my brain dead) so im leavin with a shirtless pic cause my hobby is drawing tits

in short, charming asshole who can get ugly, secretly feels lonely and small, works hard for himself, better have him as a friend than as a foe though probably not the most frontally agressive enemy, and also, your booty, hand it over.

[miseryff]

19. Sit Down

Paris

My weekend spent in Houston,TX was nothing short of litty! Besides the no having sex due to my period, I spent a wonderful three days with Derrick. Now I was back in Long Island and I can not say that I missed the towns that much. It was minutes to noon on Sunday and the only thing on my mind was getting some sleep because I had to go back to work tomorrow. 

Damn, this adulting shit had no pause button.

“Where’s your lil boyfriend at, London Paris?” I rolled my eyes at my dad, and only sipped on my bottled water as we awaited Derrick’s arrival. My dad orchestrated the whole gathering with my mother. The plan was to have Derrick and I have a Sunday brunch so that they could get more acquainted with him. I honestly do not know why they want to be familiar with Derrick so badly. I mean its not like he would be coming around them that often anyways. I was still in the hot seat for flying to Houston against my parent’s wishes though, so I had to play nice and agree to this sit down.

“Chris, leave her alone.” That was my mom coming to my rescue, for once. I side eyed her just as the door bell rang. She must have got some dick last night because she’s been extra kind to me since I pulled up to the crib earlier this morning.  I motioned to get the door but my big ass, dinosaur ass pops was already sprinting down the hall. I fake chuckled before looking over at my mom. She was already staring at me, being all weird. “Ma, you gucci?”

“What do you mean, baby?”

“I mean you being fake nice for some reason. Dad dropped some dick off last--”

“Paris, stop. I am not one of your lil ho friends. Don’t talk to me like that.” I could not hold in my laughter as I looked into her guilty eyes. She was trying so hard to keep her face neutral but shawty was blushing OD. “Ewww, yall need to get back together already--”

“The man of the hour is here!” My sentence was cut short by my father’s extra boisterous voice. I looked over into the doorway and there stood Derrick, looking even more sexy than he did a couple hours ago when he dropped me off at home. He went to his aunt’s house to fake nap and freshen up, since he had about two hours before he needed to be back at my house. This man looked like an advertisement for raw sex and I wanted him. Damn, I wonder I could suck him--

“Paris, hello? You not gonn introduce ya man to my fine ass baby moms? Fine, I’ll do it myself. Lil rude ass.” I blinked a few times before leveling my eyes from the front of Derrick’s grey dress pants, and meeting my father’s eyes. I heard Derrick chuckle as he and my father walked more into the kitchen. “Clean ya mind, ma” Derrick mumbled as he brushed past me lightly.

I could hear Derrick and my mom getting acquainted, so I used this time to pull my dad to the side to set some shit straight. “Yo...”

“Who you yo-ing, lil girl? Run that shit back.” I made the stank face as I watched him undo the wrapper from a yellow Starburst. But I’m the lil girl? “What, Paris? Speak up.”

“Can you not embarrass me today in front of my nigga? You do that a lot and I’m not with it the shits. I don’t even wanna be here for this bullshit mixer brunch, so--”

“When do I ever embarrass you, Paris? You do that job perfectly well  by yourself’ like when you lied about entering a rehab program for the weekend, only to have ya smart ass daddy pop up on ya baecation.” He showed me the yellow Starburst in his mouth before pulling me into a hug when I turned to walk away. “Dadddd...”

“Hush up and hug me back. I ain’t gonn embarrass you, aight?. I can tell you like this kid and he aight so far, so ima be on my best behavior.” Those words placed a tiny smile on my lips so I wrapped him back tightly, snickering when he started whining. “Old ass nigga! I heard a couple bones crack.”

“Fuck outta here, bum!” He pushed me away from him a little too roughly and I caught my balance before punching him in the chest. “Yeaa, talk yo shit now gramps.” I went to punch his bird chest again but my mom saved his slow, tired ass.

“Can yall beasts stop playing in my kitchen? Lets sit and eat before the food gets cold. Waiting on Derrick’s turtle ass all morning and shit.” The loudest laugh left my lips and I walked over to Derrick who was wearing the ‘I ate ass’ face. “Ma, don’t shade my baby. Do you see how he looks? His fine ass had--”

“Yuck.” That was my hating ass pops. “Cmon man, lemme save you from this thirst bucket I call a daughter.” He rudely pushed me out the way and dropped his arm over Derrick’s shoulder as they walked out the kitchen. My jaw hit the floor  once I heard the two roar in laughter. It was then my mom’s laughing that forced me to tear my eyes from the two. “Ya dad has a  man crush Mondaaayy” she sang as she walked around my frozen body. 

“His gay ass!”

XX

Brunch went... well?

We actually ate and there was no shit that popped off. My dad was on his best behavior, as promised, minus the corny attempts to make Derrick laugh. I never thought I would agree with my mom’s opinion ever but she was right, Dad had a MCM... and it was my nigga.

“I fake wish Cae and Carter was here. I gave them money for the mall because I thought it would be a shit show.” I joked as I watched my mom gather up the plates from the table. I would get up and help her but that’s what my lazy ass pops was for. “Really? I was wondering why they was dressed and speeding out the door. They bout to spend off ya money in that mall.” My mom chucked lightly as she continued to stack the plates.

“Dad, go help mom bring the dishes to the kitchen and leave my nigga alone. He can not and will not hook you up on the Js dropping next week. Fuck outta here.”

“Paris, shut ya ass up. Now like I was saying--”

“Chris, I need help for real. Fuck dem shoes.” Derrick and I shared a laugh as we watched my mom staredown my pops. “Really, Alana? You think that glaring shit still work on me?”

No more words came from my moms mouth. The room would have been silent but Derrick and I were being goofy as shit and laughing like a bunch of school girls. Maybe another minute of my mom staring down my pops passed, before we heard his chair scrape against the wooden floors. “Simp ass nigga” I coughed loudly. “Damn, some shit was stuck in my throat.”

Can yall believe my grown ass pops sent me the middle finger? “And one for you too, Derrick. To think I had an ally in this bitch. That’s when they smile in my face...” He sand off key as he followed my mom out of the dining room. More laughter filled the living room and I had to wipe underneath my eye with my tank top because my dad was really a dickhead. Wow.

“Ya pops funny as shit.” Derrick chuckled some more, and then made a face when I pulled him out his seat by his arm. “Where we--”

“Shut up, and hurry up.” I whispered as I ushered him out of the dining room and down the hallway. I could hear my parents conversing in the kitchen and loud laughter as I started up the staircase. “Where we going, Paris?”

“To my room, Derrick. Now shut up.” The slap that was sent to my ass did nothing but make me more wet than I already was. Do yall know how hard it was to sit across from this sexy ass nigga and not be able to feel his dick down my throat? Shiiiidddd.

Once we entered my bedroom I turned the lock and pushed him up against the door. “I’m bout to suck fire out ya dick, just in case you was about to ask me what I’m doing.” I winked at him before dropping to my knees and working on his dress pants. His dick print was pressed up against his pants and I knew his dick wanted nothing more than to find refuge in my mouth.

He said nothing, only took a grip of my jet black hair and guided my head to his already hard dick. Opening my mouth slowly, I deep throat his shit in one try, and felt a feeling of accomplishment once I heard his low grunts. 

Oh yea, he’s mine.

Derrick

Paris is crazy.

I don’t remember the last time I did this high school shit; where a shawty snuck me up to her bedroom to get the work. Then again, she just left high school last year so it made sense. My bottom lip sunk into my mouth as I watched her get busy on my dick. I can’t lie, Paris gave the best head I have ever had in my life. Its like she was a pro at this shit and she was tryna suck the brown off my dick. I loved it.

“You like how my dick taste?” I spoke lowly as I tightened my grip on her straight black hair. Paris as a blondie was fire, no debate, But Paris with the jet black hair? Lets just say my dick was never on soft around her. She got it. “I love how your shit tastes. This my shit.” That was another thing I loved about Paris. The raw, NYC lingo. She spoke like a crip nigga but looked like a Hampton socialite. That was a fire ass mix.

Before I knew it both of my hands were are the back on her head and I was face fucking the shit out of her. And best believe mama kept up. No hands, on some Waka Flocka shit. “Yea, this yo shit.” Pulling her back by her hair, I watched as my dick slid out her mouth. “Open up,” a smile touched my lips as I watched her follow my every direction. It did something to me watching her welcome my spit into her mouth. After she licked her lips, she took my dick back into her mouth and finished me off. Pulling her up to stand, I pressed my lips to hers before switching places.

She was now laying with her chest against the door and I quickly pulled her black leggings down her legs. “Im still on my period, babe.”

“I know...” I mumbled as I searched for the condom in my wallet, As soon as I was wrapped up, I hiked her leg up and slid into her wetness with ease. “Fuckk,” we cursed at the same time. 

“You better fuck the shit out of me. And make me cum.”

Oh yea, she mine.

[bkanvas-fairy]

Could you tell us a little about your characters?

Y E S !

but due to me having at least over a thousand characters I’ll just give a quick summary of the 25 I manage to dig up over 3 sketchbooks.

Y’all can pick and choose which of them interest yall or who you wanna hear more about!

Also because I’m extra, I made sketch icons for the 25 characters, info under the cut

I’ll talk a bit more about my actual Original Characters first, starting with

Aiko! Otherwise known as Echo

- A marked individual in a steampunk world that gets mixed with magic, because I like both of those things

- Echo runs an underground lab that does helps the underground world with replacing body parts, illegal surgeries etc etc

- Even though she marked, which puts a bounty on her head already, she is well respected by the community for not cheating for your money, stealing your cash, or shanking/killing you mid-surgery

- however, Echo does long for adventure and sometimes do get bored in the lab

oh yeah,, Echo like stealing eyeballs, so if you’re low on cash and wouldn’t mind losing an eye, you know who to call!!

Bonus:

Here’s Echo’s boring, undeveloped sidekick!! I don’t like her and I don’t know how to make her better. Yes, she doesn’t have a name.

here’s my god playboy that left “heaven” due to having an early mid-life crisis, I call him God boi cause;

- He goes by many names! 

tbh, he’s probably the closest character I have to being genderfluid/-neutral? I’m not sure,,

- The god has many powers, from lightning to shapeshifting

- The shapeshifting part allows him to change every part of himself, allowing him to change depending on his situation.

- God boyo, or originally Aristide, is obsessed with the idea of perfection. A god should be perfect, if a god is out of line, he is no god. 

- Same goes for him, which means whenever something is wrong with him, it affects him, extremely

However, leaving the land of gods to live among humans aren’t all perks

- Aris isn’t immune to diseases or injuries. In fact, he actually fell down and died on impact when he came to earth, being reborn into another child immediately.

- He doesn’t gain his memories back automatically tho!! He has to have a major shock to the brain in order for him to remember his previous lives

- Sometimes the shock isn’t enough either, when you have a thousand over lives, you won’t remember every single one of them. So forgotten lovers coming back to haunt because your brain hates you? That’s everyday for him!

i just,, i like playing with the concepts of god,,

Up next we got Ayeka Himura! A japanese student going to a neighborhood, but still a pretty good, school living close to poverty due to her father’s constant spending habits and obsession with art supplies. With the household lacking a mother due to wacky shenanigans, Ayeka takes care of her two younger siblings and the house, all while maintaining a very well-paid job and slowly loosing interest in actually studying for a good, honest job.

also she likes birds!!

Yes her design is heavily “based” off Toga but I love her current design too much to change it, h e l p

So like,, I suck at chinese and I made ocs that exclusively spoke in chinese to help with that but I’m still stuck at 40~marks

I forgot his scar but remembered his earring i hate myself

my og chinese kiddo! he was was first to come and I love his design ever since

he radiates fuck you energy except the girl below. He’s neighbors with her and they acknowledge each other existence ever since. he has a dumb cliche crush on her and is a bit protective of her because nothing says having issues than latching onto someone that makes you happy

Only this girl got named!! even tho she was the second character.

Li Shen, yes she doesnt have a surname, is apparently main ho now, according to my old oc chart of my “main” ocs

She’s the group’s resident sweetheart and really does not want you to do stupid shit, stop doing stupid shit. She tutors my son up there ^^ even though he’s actually smart and just refuses to do his work properly. But she still deeply cares for him.

As well as the girl below shdifhd

the last girl of the ching chong trio and the reason I had to switch up my son’s design is this girly over here! Her design was too business-y and formal so I enrolled all of them into college. A rich girl who doesn’t know how to deal with her g a y thoughts. Tried sending Li Shen some flowers once. She didn’t realize attaching her name would be a good idea and son got a good laugh.

i like paranormal stuff so they apparently look into that shit in their spare time. They’re all actually really fun characters to do prompts with I swear!! send some in and I’ll write them

I had a previous concept for son and Li Shen before last girl came and if yall want me to talk about it,,, i found my sketchbook with the old ideas,,

NEXT UP IS MY OLD GIRL ELORA!!

Elora herself used to be a fan character but I pulled her out and wow\

cant fucking believe she used to be straight for Vylad

shes the outgoing, fun adventure type! bit of mommy issues here and there tho,, I don’t want to say too much since I have an entire for her +

her now upgraded bro, Vincent

i really like the name vincent,,

also now he has mommy issues

Ead, the knight who used to have armor

I hate drawing armor 

he also have issues

AND IRIS MY SWEET GIRL IM SO SORRY

she doesnt have that much issues tho

basically I made elora and her bro have mommy issues, I’m sorry in advance if that spoils anything

I, sometimes, post about these 4 over on @eloradiesismydocsname​ and its a gay ol’ time

not that gay tho because uhh,, medieval times,, but I need prompts for a modern au of them and I am happy to talk about their personalities and even go semi in-depth for any of them!!

here we have ghoster.png,, which is her file name cause I didn’t name her,,

A horror enthusiast + film student that goes to a supposedly haunted shack to film her upcoming project with the boys. wacky shenanigans occur and the boys left leaving ghoster here to starve and eventually fall to her death. But because it’s my oc i get to bring her back from the dead, now hungry as ever and will fucking eat you, its not a kink thing, shes just that hungry and angry

tax fraud.png

a robo girl that i created during social studies cause they were talking about taxes and i just went, “what if,, a robo runs on taxes,,, and like,, she haunts you down for not paying your taxes,,” thus she was born! I don’t know what to name her but she is set in the future so-

Time to go future-apocalypse style because I love that setting too and was upset that I didn’t have any ocs in that style. So I created Alex A. ! A cybrog filled with memories of the previous generations as a sad attempt to preserve human life.

He’s accompanied by his sister/cousin idr i didn’t draw an icon for her, didnt like her design. they go on a hunt for food and to return with nothing. She gets to meet this other dude who has a plant arm im pretty sure i based him off someone’s elses oc but i cant remember. The 3 are forgotten. Kinda want to bring them back tho.

Neon! A character set in the future utopia of lazy people, where gamers rise up. its the best I can describe her story without getting too deep. She the new hacker on the block, joining the underground gang of elite hackers. She’s another one of those wacky characters that just has fun. I mean, when you know your way around codes and the world you live in is full of it, would you not take advantage of that?

as for fan characters,, uhh,, i have em

STARTING WITH MY WIFE!

Alexzandra Zara oh my god i forgot to draw her necklace and shirt

anyways,, Alexzandra is one of the more older ocs I have that didnt get a big revamp. Only an au I develop to the point I forgot the actual shows and the original cast are a little different from the source haha what? She’s the emotionally unstable german war veteran, yes the wife thing isn’t mutual, and haha shes only 27~. I cling onto her so much?? She’s hits a lot of “edgy” points but I still love her cause idk,, the story I made for her is something I hold dear cause Alexzandra was one of my first ACTUALLY DEVELOPED CHARACTER. Is it wrong to say I hold her really close to my heart? Is that weird? probably a little cringy sorry haha. I probably project a little into her which might have strengthened my love for her ack. Her story delves more into the depression very unstable needs to talk to someone side and i get scared talking about my wife’s story online so uhh, idk ask me specific questions about her, I’ll be more inclined to talk.

Dr Watts! The spoiled ass dick that stole dst Wilson’s house and yes this is a dst oc, yes im slightly sorry.

He’s just fun?? almost ran a blog with him and a friend’s oc. He’s your typical uptight old science gramps that took advantage of the fact that no one knows his real name that he calls himself a doc. He’s not. I put everything about him up to a 9-10? He’s one of those wacky characters and I love him for it! His story is really wonky tho so might need help solidifying that part 

and from the angry old man to my sweet man that will adopt you even if you’re noisy or call him ginger. Pilot here is a TF2 OC I made to interact with other tf2 OCs cause some of them are fun and i wanna join in :((

He’s the Canadian stereotype, and yes, he adopted scout, that was one of my character notes. 

Like the actual cast of tf2, there’s barely any real story to him. I only gave him a vague I don’t know my past but hey, i fly really really well. He participated in war unlike certain men but he’s still really nice and will only kill you if you hurt his family. Which he doesn’t know so he just considers the cast his family. He keeps mentioning a wife though, pretty sure he doesn’t have one but you do what makes you happy son.

Ai! an oc I HEAVILY revamped oh my god i hate her old vers. So if yall remember my random shouting of missing my og son, Aru. Here’s his bff. cause he barely has any actual friends that give a shit. And I just cant have that. but here’s your yandere revamped into a last minute addition. I actually feel like I did Ai a lot of justice. I don’t want to delve too deep cause I will start making charts. I’ll do that in a separate post if yall are keen

Isamu Aena! a mp100 oc I made by accident cause idk,, I was thinking about lolita fashion and all of a sudden, the actual oc I was going to make turned into a mob psycho oc. She’s one of my few ocs where her sexuality matters (she’s gay yeah) cause it plays a role in her storyline. She went from being “manipulated”/used to Mob’s wingwomen. She spots out things that can help him in the romantic department cause she’s into romance. A student of the school Mob infiltrated and a fantastic tailor, not to mention a pretty decent pyschic. wait where do models get their lolita stuff from,,

im gonna ignore that and move onto Lillian Yi! Who, i swear i did not meant for it, is very close to lloyd. I mean,, none of the ninjas were with him after s3, who you think he’d meet. Lillian is a survivor from the Great Devourour and yes I’m still pissed LEGO stole my backstory for Lillian to use for Harumi. FUCK YOU LEGO, i still love both of em tho,, The event did leave a big scar and it made Lillian job jumping for a bit, ending at Chen’s Noodles in S6~, where ya know,, stuff got better. She was a medalist for gymnastics and continue the activity, even after her parents’ death, to please others. She was already lost at the time so staying in the sport would help, right? Needless to say, after being rejected at a cop academy for youths, or something similar, she gave up for a while but got back into the idea of saving people by using her skills she already had. It helped with the weight and feelings and meeting the green ninja was a very big bonus. Also Lloyd dubbed her the “mysterious stranger” when she refused to speak in fear of her identity, slight shame, and maybe a bit of being star struck. It helped Lloyd too in a sense where he had something to distract him from Zane’s passing.

 Their relationship was eventually formed, strong and almost unbreakable, except for harumi but uhh thats a different story. Throughout the seasons, they stayed close and lloyd was always comforted by Lillian went times get ruff.

Also Lillian is my most light-hearted characters and I think that says a lot

Then there’s Nite “I don’t want to be your dad”. A character that is supposed to be in the ninjago world but barely interacts with the main story and only stays in his self contained plot. He was supposed to get a bf but uhhh idk. He’s the master of shifting and streams that online, taking out small crimes, and is actually really shy and doesn’t like interacting with people.

also haha fortnite

Nora Akino, the sin of despair! its an ad thing, I think. She speaks only in a foreign language that only Odin understands and is either big gay for Ava or Maggi, she can’t pick. And yes she did drink the vial, when TITAN attacks your planet and you accidentally die, how else can you meet your family again? also my grandpa walked in and said she looks like royalty. cool-

she wouldn’t leave my hand for like,, 3 days or something

Petri, a fellow troublemaker at camp campbell’s music camp. She managed to pick the camp because apparently a parent who doesn’t acknowledge your hard work don’t read the fine print! Please let David adopt her,,

LASTLY! Yukimaru Atsuko, hero name; Gummie. She goes by Yuki and is a big dick. She’s a studious student but gets more thrills on the actual battlefield. Living with her uptight grandma and her big bottom energy bro, she has the dom energy thing going. and apparently folks on G+, or the people who comment about her, thinks she’s really pretty, which was oddly a thing back before UA. She’s the dick you can like, not like Bakugou but she will definitely want to fight Bakugou. 

A gum-related quirk is not full of perks when its only your hands. I’d dive more into her like her insecurities and stuff but I’ve been here for probably 3hrs. Sorry anon.

Also I’m so sorry to anyone who reads this all the way through.

[kitsuhe]

i wanna rant about my shitty grandparents (mostly grandfather for now) and how my parents didnt deserve any of this.

a side story of how my parents met: my mom was from China and worked in a cafe (with lodging) for years. she wanted to leave china because the marriage laws werent very good to women, they didnt have a lot of rights, and people can just get married and divorced on a whim, and so a marriage there would make her feel very insecure.

she saw loads of men with fancy motorcycles they probably borrowed flirting with the waitresses and getting them pregnant even though some of those men were married already. she saw loads of waitresses in and out of the job, and so she willed to never give in to the flirtations and worked at the cafe till she was around 26.

my father’s boss was in that area once in a while and frequented that cafe. he noticed my mom who always remained there and was like hey she seemed to be a nice woman and so he introduced her to his son, aka my fathers colleague.

according to my mom, the son was a wishy-washy man who couldnt make up his mind. they went for a few dates and things werent really clicking. my father, however, said ‘i want her’ when he saw her and so the choice was made, they started dating, and she went back to china for the time being. they then maintained a long distance relationship with phone calls, and one year later she came to singapore and got married. 

cute, right?

then the in-laws hell, aka my grandparents begun.

and now my father’s backstory, first:

he was the classic example of the scapegoat i think. out of his siblings (an older brother, a younger brother, and a younger sister), he was the one my grandparents hated the most. ‘hated’ isnt even an exaggeration, apparently hey did tell him explicitly that he was the one they hated the most. A+ parenting yall. when in school, while his siblings get 50cents and 30cents (in order of favouritism), he got 20cents or none. they didnt care about the education of their kids, and so my dad dropped out at P3 (9 years old) and the others all within primary school age. my aunt may have went further though, im not sure.

when he started working at 13, my grandma would wait at the door everytime he got his salary and took all of it away. i dont think he got to keep any of it. she gambled quite often and spent loads of money.

it was from these incredibly unfair xperiences on childhood that my dad swore he would treat and spoil his kids and not show favouritism.

my parents got married years later, and basically everyone in my extended family h a t e d my mom, despite it being entirely non-justified because my mom is a freaking wonderful woman who isnt afraid of hardwork. Because my mom came from china, im presuming that its some mixture of xenophobia and racism that made them say that my mom was only here to mooch off my dad, and treat her like shit, until they didnt as they finally opened their eyes.

over here, all men have to go through compulsory national serivce, and my dad was no exception. after serving the 2 years they have to go back periodically for reservist training. this is the background info for this incident im going to repeat from my mother.

after she got married over here, my dad still had to go for reservist training. they only had a limited amount of time to use the phone after one entire week. my mom called him, talked to him as his wife, before uncle2 (the younger brother) interruppted her and told her to stop using the phone. assuming that he had an emergency,  my mom quickly finished and hung up, my dad losing his rare few minutes to talk to his wife.

then uncle2 didnt use the phone.

god fucking damn it.

an example of unfair treatment: uncle1 had a different wife at that time. while my mom cooked entire meals for the family (they were living with my grandparents and uncle2 and probably aunt at that time) while being pregnant, when it came to be her birthday, my grandma didnt give her a red packet (gift of money). ‘im an old woman who hasnt worked for years, i have no money’.

then when it came to uncle1′s wife, who had never cooked any food and only got takeaways when she visited, she got a big shiny red packet from my grandma.

yeah, what the hell. my mom said she was very upset about this and cried. god, she was surrounded by people who hated her and yet she still worked so hard for them, she genuinely doesnt deserve this.

heres another thing about my grandma: apparently she gambled so often she oftently went to genting to gamble and the money all came from her kids. yeah. .

(my dads a chef, uncle1 is a mechanic, uncle2 is a part timer with no set jobs, and aunt is unknown.)

then i was born. my mom wasnt a citizen, and had to pay a lot of money to stay in the most expensive hospital word. the rare good thing my grandpa did was to fork out $2000 for her to have me. one day, if i can and he isnt dead yet, i will pay him back. ‘thats your coffin money’ i will say. ‘im not obligated to you anymore please leave my life forever’ i want to say.

looking back at the thick stack of photo albums, things appeared to be all happy and fun. people were smiling in the pictures, and i was showered in love and affection from everyone. it is only recently that i came to learn of the shit my parents went through under them.

i was also a lively and boisterous child who had no concept of day and night, it was almost enough to scare my parents into not having my siblings. nonetheless, my sister came into existence.

picture this: my dad looking all frazzled and tired as he took care of a wild toddler at the hospital without sleeping for 3 days straight, and my mom in labour, waiting to give birth. the nurse asked why wasnt anyone there to help out? 

my mom said that was the only time she had ever seen my dad cry. my sister, my mom, and i all teared up as she recounted this.

it was then they swore to move out and not to rely on anyone ever again. the house i am in now is paid entirely by my parents.

my sister was born, and eventually, they moved out before my brother was born.

when they moved out, my grandma shouted at them ‘dont come back! i hope you die!’

at one point, or perhaps distance made the heart grow fonder, my grandparents and uncles started to treat my mom very nicely, realising that they were utterly wrong to judge and treat her that way at the beginning. thats why they treat her so nicely now, my mom explained. it is also the reason why my grandma always brought kuehs and chocolate cake over when she visited, subsequently developing my dislike of chocolate cake and neutrality towards chocolate at best. at this point im pretty sure they all like my mom more than my dad.

my aunt learnt her lesson in the form of receiving discrimination and hatred she once showed to my mom upon being married to a family of university graduates, and her only graduating secondary school. she wasnt as well-educated, and so after sharing my moms pain of being the hated daughter in law she finally learnt empathy and started being nice.

my grandpa too was a convert. he came over everyday to help out with chores and to take care of us. perhaps when we were all young the help was truly needed back then, but then some events made everyone question his motives...

i remember him fetching me from kindergarten every day every time. i wondered why my dad never did, and was happy on the occasions he did. it is only years later that i learnt that my grandpa hogged all those times to fetch us (my siblings and i). he outright refused to let my parents especially my dad to fetch us. on the occasions that my dad came, he threw a tantrum and went home. my dad was visibly upset as he recount this to us. ‘it felt like he was keeping my kids away from me’ he said. he has taken so much from my dad, and now even his kids???? im so upset on his behalf??

it genuinely feels like hes controlling everyone around him.

he is still coming over every single day, and from what i can tell he is incredibly passive aggressive and can never be satisifed with my dad. i dread his arrival.

for example, he refuses to eat anything my dad cooked. my dad, a known chef. once my dad made a noodle dish for dinner, he told my dad oh i cant eat noodles for dinner.

cue him eating the noodles my mom cooked for dinner.

cue him getting noodles for takeaway for dinner.

these days whenever my dad cooks for dinner we just give him money for takeaway.

speaking of leaving that ungrateful old bastard money, he also takes issue with my dad for this somehow. my dad left a note saying that thats his dinner money on the table, and he felt that it was so disrespectful he went to my moms workplace which is near where he lives and complained to her.

meanwhile my mom did the exact same thing and he had zero complaints.

when my dad fell asleep in my brothers room with my brother in it, he walked in and deliberately talked at the top of his lungs about some trivial matter that never came up in the years of living here.

the creepy amount of adoration he shows my mom is also apparent in how he would follow my tired sweaty mom after shes home from work  everywhere to talk and yabber on about irrelevant things. she was obviously busy and wanted to be left alone, but hey that POS never cared about what anyone ever thought or wanted if its in conflict to what he wants. sometimes she had to close the door just to get him to leave her alone, and once he just opened the door and continued talking. my dad was enraged, he said he almost went to start a fight with him, and he would especially if my mom was in the midst of changing at the time.

once my dad brought him to the doctor. ‘so what did they say’ he would ask my dad repeatedly over and over again after seeing the doctor. ‘you are fine, and if anything happens the doctor will inform us to go to the hospital’.

he went to complain to my mom at her workplace that my dad was cursing at him to get in the hospital.

once he was nosey and opened up our mailbox, and when he found some letters addressed to my dad he slammed the pile of letters next to him on the sofa. wtf

god, its like no matter what my dad does he will NEVER be happy.

a while ago he lent his children money, and said oh its not lending hes giving them money with no strings attached, no interest at all. my dad took some for renovation, and this info will come into play later.

and so life continues on with his insistence to tidy and clean my house, with zero regards to anyones wishes. if someone so much as point out that he isnt doing something right, he would exaggerate his actions and ask and repeat.

heres the incident that triggered the Revelations:

my grandpa asked my sister if she still wanted a donut while holding it in his entire hand, as in his entire hand was clutched around the donut. visibly disgusted, my sister said no, she didnt want it. in an act of passive aggressiveness, he placed the donut and only the donut directly in the fridge. not on a plate no nothing.

my mom wrote him a note in response: my daughters are having national examinations soon, and my husband has to wake at 5am to go to work, and he doesnt have enough rest. it would be preferable if you do not make as much noise so they can study and rest properly. i am saying this here, it doesnt matter if you help with the chores or not, it is entirely up to you and we will not blame you if you choose to rest and watch tv instead. you will always have a meal and you dont need to worry about anything else. hope you can understand.

in response, he wrote back: i have read all your words, and there is no need to worry. from november, i will no longer be coming over. i want your husband to return me the renovation money. from: dumb dad (thats what he calls himself in notes)

first of fucking all: wow hes not even acknowledging that my dad is his son. second of all, hes using the money to control my parents and guilt them wtf

this incident got kinda big in the sense that my aunt got involved. my aunt, the golden child, called to stage an intervention.

she called my siblings and i privately, without my parents knowledge. she asked me:

‘are you aware that he has hearing issues and cannot tell that hes being loud?’

‘can you cope with his average noise level?’

‘is he actually disturbing you guys?’

of course i am aware. i am used to it. i am not sure why my mom wrote about the noisy part, could be the fact that he refused to let my dad rest. to which i answered:

‘yes i am aware, no he is not that noisy’

and in a nicer way, i told her ‘frankly the issue is his character, that he is a pos shit i cant stand and after knowing what he did to my parents especially my dad i dont want him in my life at all i dont want him to come over anyways’

‘how much would you say that its mostly his fault that there is conflict or is your dad making a big deal out of nothing?’

i bit my tongue and said its my grandpa 95% of the time. there are one or two occasions that i would say my dad is over reacting.

then she went on and on about how she has to balance both perspective and pick the best outcome, and there are two sides etc etc

what fucking two sides i wanted to ask. my parents literally did nothing wrong. he was the hand that clutched at the donut and squished it.

eventually, she yelled at him and to serious disappointment hes coming over again.

a little interlude about my aunt: she complained to my mom afterwards (im surrounded by snitches) that i am not very respectful about my grandpa, that i am lazy and didnt help around the house often (i tidied and cleaned my room frequently, and if my mom ask me to do chores i would. theres an agreement that i should just concentrate on my studies and she will take care of the chores). i stay in my room all the time and didnt come out when my relatives came over. (listen, theres nothing for me. my cousins are ur typical boys that i cant talk to, they hog the xbox and scream about fifa all the time, im not exactly interested in the adults conversations).

my mom defended me, yall. even my aunt has to concede that im a decent person.

and my mom told me she didnt actually agree with the way shes raising my cousins. they were told to never question my aunt and uncle, and their orders are orders. my parents didnt agree, they believed in reason. for everything they tell us to do, there is a legit reason behind it, and we can question them. my mom want us to do well so that she can prove that shes right all along.

my brother recall asking the cousins why my relatives didnt allow them to do certain things and they just shrugged.

well, thats a bet i am willing to participate in.

back to my grandpa.

my parents reasoning is that as compared to taking revenge and stop contacting him, they rather treat him decently no matter what, knowing deep down they has always did their best.

due to the way healthcare works here, my dad shouldered most of the hospital bill and healthcare when his parents were in the hospital. because #asianvalues, they never did thank him or appreciate him.

either my parents or my aunt said they are scared that if we do anything too drastic like refusing him to come here, he will go senile and demented. as he is now he has a clear enough mind to remain a dickbag to my dad.

well, i wasnt exactly close to him, or as close as he deluded himself to think. i wasnt exactly patient with him, in the sense that i kinda have to raise my voice to communicate with him pretty often. heres the complicated relationship between languages: he speaks mostly teochew, and some chinese. we are expected to understand him when he speaks chinese to get across something, but somehow when i speak my perfectly accurate chinese back at him he understands nothing. he will smile stupidly at me, nodding as if he understood.

you fake old man. you understood nothing. i dont want to bother. i am mean for saying this. i hate your pretenses. quit acting like you understand.the conversations between us are fruitless and useless and has zero point. just now, you saying while im eating dinner that ‘you should give me 50 dollars. look at me, i have nothing. ahahahahaha’

i ignored him, as my cold shoulders got colder.

‘your mother did give me $120, i actually have money. what a good girl’

just, what the fuck is he on about. why are you even asking me for money when you have it. this is the exact type of inane pointless conversations you have. i dont even want to dignify that with a response.

he went to my sister, 3 meters away from me, and said the exact same thing.

my sister: [turning her pockets inside out] i have no money

him, repeating what he said , and adding on ‘you are a good girl, your sister is bad, she didnt want to give me money’ 

what the fuck. hes still talking to us like we are 5. he always treat us like were 5. once i facepalmed and he told me not to do that i will give myself brain damage. i proceed to whack my forehead 4 times, each whack resounding loud and clear.

god, i really dont want to interact with him. theres guilt niggling at me that i shouldnt treat him like this, pretending he doesnt exist as much as possible. then i remember what he did to my dad, and also kinda my mom, and something in me says ‘he doesnt deserve a relationship with his grandchildren for treating his own son like this’.

god, how do i get him to understand that i dont want anything to do with him? that i hate him? i stop calling him ‘grandpa’, only referring to him as that. i dont greet him when he come over anymore.

a few days? weeks? ago he said as he walked out of my room: ‘i still love you the most.’

thats the problem aint it? favouritism. and we all know you favour my brother the most, which i dont mind. i want you to stop doting on me, i want you to pretend i dont exist too. not in the way where you blatantly talk and criticise someone to somebody in front of the person you are criticising. 

when is karma ever coming for you?

nothing but you mattered to you, you dipshit. you never cared about how others may feel. you always did things your own way, you treat people whatever the hell you want to.

i visited you in the hospital after the operation on your balls, you were so happy afterwards you gave me a $50. i still wish i hadnt visited, you disgusting person. i wish i can give you the $50 back, but i think, ill keep it. i will treat it as a woeful attempt to ‘reward’ me for my love and affections. i will keep the money knowing that your love is not returned. cruel of me, but so were you.

i dont think there will ever be a resolution. i wont cry at your funeral, i will try not to. i did for my grandma, but that was before i knew the truth.

my mom told me it is undeniable that my relatives all doted and loved me. i want to reject your love. i want the right to not be loved.

[rogue-rook]

many highlights from The Eleventh Hour from a first-time TAZ listener

featuring bits from Lunar Interlude III: Rest and Relaxation

oh god is this lunar interlude a goddamn ASMR experience

are carey fangbattle and killian dating?

i’m almost 100% sure griffin said “fisticups” instead of “fisticuffs”

griffin: “okay, you spend the next few weeks learning from carey” oh, okay griffin, i see, we’re taking the LAZINESS route on this campaign now. maybe there were some good snorlaxes to catch on that route or something, but now we’ll never know!

a semi-incomplete list of words that griffin has made up during TAZ: “cruft, geezers creezers, and scrumbled” except scrumbled was stolen from justin

my first thought when i realized taako and sweet ango were going to be spending this interlude together was “oh no taako is about to just bully the goddamn earwax out of sweet ango”

I JUST REALIZED ANGUS MACDONALD IS 10 GODDAMN YEARS OLD. where are his parents??? he had a grandpa who died, right? who’s taking care of him? did lucretia kidnap him to illegally “employ” THIS LITERAL CHILD at the bureau of balance??

WAIT IS LUCRETIA HIS MOM?

taako just called sweet ango “agnes”

THE UMBRA STAFF JUST TOOK CONTROL AND BLASTED “LUP” INTO THE WALL AND IM LIKE LUP!!!! ITS LUP!!!

the Hole-Thrower is a goddamn genius object but i wish it wasn’t just for “non-magical, non-living” things bc i wanna see taako throw a hole into an enemy

magnus: “i want a black mastiff” griffin: “but you know, theres’s no dogs on the moon!”

the grubby grifters went over budget at the fantasy costco and griffin's voice like animorph-style changed into garfield the deals asshole‘s voice and im like. uncomfortable

travis: “i’m now a level 8 fighter and a level 2 rogue” “which i think makes sense for magnus bc you’re a protecting guardian but you’re also kinda a nasty boy on that battlefield”

the grubby grifters are the only bureau employees not to be super choked up about boyland’s death and im like “hey maybe you assholes shouldn’t have tried to desecrate his crystalized corpse”

WIVES AND HUSBANDS AND STUFF

if the voidfish is either nice or neutral, then it singing to magus is adorable

if the voidfish turns out to be evil, then it singing to magnus is super super ominous

the director: “avi had to miss boyland’s rites of remembrance” merle: “i didn’t know that was an option"

names suggested for the woven gulch before griffin decided that: dry bones, gucci gulch, the taint, the devil’s taint, ravine, gulch, the blasted lands, the not-blasted lands, the flavor-blasted lands, the grandd canyon (not a typo), the taco bell grande canyon, the arid waste, tattoine

all the grubby grifters: “SUMMER LOOKS! SUMMER LOOKS! SUMMER LOOKS!”

taako: "thanks garfield, can we leave now?" "I WISH YOU WOULD"

sweet ango has to launch the grubby grifters down to the woven gulch and he’s so terrified and im like ango, they should be more nervous, they’re yOUR BULLIES!!

magnus: “we don’t have to mean EVERY time!” okay, magnus, that’s rich coming from you, seeing as you’ve been the worst to angus

travis: “you as the DM didn't remind your players” griffin: “oh i didn't know this was a baby game for CHILDREN”

magnus: “what it we just didn't attack them this round and just saw what they did?” merle: “WHO ARE YOU??”

griffin: “it's kind of rustic” magnus: “FINALLY, MY RUSTIC FOLK HERO THING WILL WORK AND PEOPLE WILL LIKE ME!!!”

“by their sacrifice, our home is made safe” WHAT THE FUCK!

griffin: “where the robe it, it has been stained or oxidized, turning it a bright crimson red" "oh.....like...the bad guys...” YALL THAT’S SO. THAT’S SOME SHIT. THAT’S SOME MYSTERIOUS SHIT

taako: “okay, cool, I’m not into labels either” yooooooo 

i googled the map griffin made for the town of Refuge and hot damn, that’s a well made map

magnus: “i rolled a 10 [on a perception check]” griffin: “you're in a prison cell with bars on it” merle: “i rolled a 1″ griffin: “you are in a cube shaped place”

griffin: “and then all three of you, have died” WHAT IN THE FUCK????? WHAT THE HELL??? WHAT????

THE SET UP OF THIS ARC IS BOMB AS HELLLLLLLLLLLLL

the fact that paloma sounds like bjork tells me that griffin is just straight up running out of different accents

[merle continues to sing to the tune of book of mormon] travis: “clinton. you just got clocked by a shovel”

justin: “i’m gonna delete the video i was making about how to do an infinite diamond glitch in the adventure zone”

griffin: “there are many rocks piled up” justin: “mini rocks are actually called pebbles, griffin”

griffy set up this quarry locker room tripwire puzzle exactly like a fucking game of hangman! the most deadly game of hangman ever

griffin: “lemme just say that diamonds are the currency of this town. you wouldn’t go to the US treasury to get dollars fresh from the printing press” justin: “what, you want me to get a part time job??” griffin: “i wouldn't hate it”

griffin: “i just agreed to what dad said without really processing what it was that he said, and what he said was the name "bjork" as bork” clint: “you gotta watch that shit, griffin” griffin: “i was almost an accomplice to that heinous act”

the grubby grifters just unquestioningly trust paloma the bjork witch without any sort of investigation checks or ANYTHING and im like what if she’s evil, my dudes. what if she’s leading you astray

griffin: “the human spell library, clint mcelroy”

griffin: “if you can just instantly bring back any dead person to life, it may reduce the narrative stakes of the adventure zone podcast A BIT!” AH SHIT SON!!

magnus: “im gonna....cut his arm off” griffin: “OH MY GOD!! YOU LOVE THIS SHIT! YOU’RE A PERVERT! YOU'RE EXPOSING EVERYONE TO YOUR FETISH!!”

istus is cool and awesome and she knits but all this shit she’s talking about it is just context-less gibberish

“you’re going to be amazing” AT WHAT, MOTHERFUCKER? YOU’RE COOL AND YOU HANDED OUT BOMB ASS GIFTS BUT WHAT THE SHIT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT??

hot damn yall. this time chalice is trying to PERSUADE the grubby grifters and my evil bullshit meter thinks this is SUPER HELLA SUSPENSEFUL

AW SHIT! BACKSTORIES!

damn this chalice is so tempting. i can’t even imagine

these backstories are heartbreaking. im blown away by the way the mcelroys have crafted this part of the story, and so so sad. especially about magnus

“its not what julia would want” travis stop making me feel these things

magnus: “noelle ended up with a new shiny robot body!” taako: “an unkillable robot! I'd call that an upgrade!”

oh no the chalice is forcing them to watch the destruction of phandolin, what an asshole

magnus: “i’m gonna throw a whole bunch of robot arms into him” griffin: “okay, so you just have a hefty bag full of roboid arms??” 

merle: “we owe a big one to penumbra" magnus: "paloma"

magnus: “we gotta jump” roswell: “this is a shitty shitty shit shit plan, i hope you know that” i love roswell’s instinctive reaction when presented with a dumb idea, which is to respond with pure immediate honesty and tell the grubby grifters that their ideas are dumb as hell

this worm fight is bizarre as fuck, what the fuck are they even DOING???

aw the weird worm just wanted to escape the bubble so it could get back to its babies! that’s...almost adorable. if it wasn’t a giant fucking worm

oh good. the red robe is back. cool cool cool cool cool

magnus: “you’re proud of us? what? you’re a red robe, you’re one of the bad guys?” the red robe: “who told you that?”

GRIFFIN JUST CALLED IT A LICH!!!!!

the red robe said “lup, they don’t trust me. lup i can’t do it anymore” and “the next time we meet, i’ll need you to trust me completely. the hunger is almost here, and all this could be lost” YALLL IM CONFUSED ASSSS FFFUCKKKK BUT IM SO EXCITED ABOUT WHOEVER THE FUCK THIS PARSELTONGUE MOTHERFUCKER IS!!

well taako got a prophecy saying he would one day get power from “the man wreathed in flames” so like im pretty goddamn sure the parseltongue motherfucker is barry bluejeans. there’s a lich around, barry got blasted to hell by gundren rockseeker, and the red robe wants the grubby grifters to trust him, so like 2+2+2 probably equals barry fucking bluejeans here

the fact that they got to watch over the town of refuge for 7 years was soooooo sweet!!!!

hot damn the red robe’s been protecting magnus this whole time???

travis asking istus why there’s long gaps in their memories like hey trav griffy doesn’t want you or me or anyone else to know yet, but good try!

magnus: “if you get bored, there's this half-moon thing in the sky, you can come hang out with us” taako: “yeah most birds can fly to the MOON!”

kravitz!!! anytime kravitz shows back up is a GOOD GODDAMN TIME!! because i love kravitz

the red robe in the statue in Refuse HAS MAGNUS’S FACE!!!

i have literal goddamn chills. that is so good

this was a very odd meandering arc and i didn’t know what the hell was going on half the time but it was super super super enjoyable and some of the plot shit got me HYPED AS HELL

[winterscaptain]

misdirected.

Aaron Hotchner x Gender Neutral Reader

a/n: alright! The moment yall have been waiting for (other than that last moment you were all waiting for!) we have jack’s quick rebellion! Yay! this takes place in au!march 2012.

words: 1.35k warnings: language, a touch of angst and then its cute

summary: any change, even a change for the better, is always accompanied by drawbacks and discomforts. - arnold bennett

masterlist | a joyful future masterlist | ajf faq | requests closed!

“C’mon kiddo, time for bed.” 

Jack, still frustrated from his dad’s confiscation of the Wii hours earlier, promptly and simply responds, “No.” 

“Jack…”

“I want to keep building.” 

You step farther into his room and kneel beside him. “Can we build some more in the morning? Maybe together?” 

He shakes his head. “I want to build now. By myself." 

You know Aaron is in the other room. You know you should go get him. There’s part of you stubbornly reliant on your closeness with Jack, so you try again. “Jack, babe, it’s past eight, we needed to start getting ready about fifteen minutes ago.” 

When you reach out to touch his shoulder, he flinches. You draw your hand back as if burned and search for his eyes. “You alright, bud?”

“Go away.” 

Tears spring into your eyes, but you keep them back with a deep breath. “Is there something I can do for you before I go?”

“I want my dad.” 

“Okay.” Taking the loss, you stand and pad down the hallway, trying to smooth out your breath along the way. 

He’s never been like that. 

He’s never talked to me like that. 

Aaron instantly picks up on your anguish when you close the bedroom door behind you, closing the case file in his lap. “What’s wrong?”

You open your mouth to speak, but are overcome before anything can come out. 

He, of course, fears the worst at your silence, jumping out of bed. “Is Jack alright, where is -”

“He’s fine. He’s fine.” You stop him with two hands flat on his chest, and he immediately picks them up, kissing your fingers. 

“Baby, what’s wrong. You’re scaring me a little.” 

You shake your head. “Jack’s just - he…” You take another breath. “He just snapped at me and -” You falter, feeling a little silly for being so affected by a six-year-old’s misdirected frustration. 

Aaron pulls you to his chest and you bring your hands under his arms and around his shoulders, winding your fingers in his shirt. “Oh, honey. I’m sorry. What happened?”

“I told him,” you say around little hiccups, “I told him it was time for bed, like I usually do, and he just...said no and told me to go away and get you.” Your grip on his shirt loosens a little as he pulls back, wiping your tears with his thumb. “It seems so small, I almost feel stupid -” 

“No. Don’t feel stupid. I’ll go talk to him.” 

You nod, accepting the kiss pressed to your cheek. 

He leaves the door open behind him, and you go to the bathroom to wash your face and get ready for bed yourself, even though it's two hours earlier than normal - you’re exhausted. Aaron’s voice murmurs down the hall, with some interjections by Jack here and there. Two pairs of feet travel to the hall bath before Aaron trots in to grab his toothbrush with another quick kiss to your temple. 

You listen as they brush their teeth together in the hall and return to Jack’s room. After a long time sitting on the edge of the bathtub, you slip into bed and close your eyes. 

Sleep doesn’t come. 

Aaron returns and flips the light switch, bathing the room in a blue-tinted darkness. You’ve calmed down significantly since he left, but you’d be lying if you said you felt any better. 

He tucks up behind you, flush to your back from back to calf, and wraps an arm around you. “Hi.”

You hum a little by way of greeting. 

“Jack and I are gonna have a little day tomorrow, just us. I think the transition is a lot for him and having you here with us isn’t as easy as he expected.” 

You nod. “That’s fine.” 

He presses a kiss to the back of your neck. “I’m sorry he lashed out at you today, honey. He loves you so much.” 

“I know.” You sniff. “He’s just little and he lost his mom and it’s a lot after just having you and Jess around for so long and you were just gone for a long time and...” 

“Yeah,” Aaron says, nearly at a whisper. “The changes probably snuck up on him and I was a little hard on him this afternoon - his attitude, while badly-placed, isn’t a mystery.” 

“Right.” 

His lips travel in sweet kisses from behind your ear to your shoulder. “I love you so much. I’m so glad you’re here.” 

Your lower lip shakes as a fresh set of tears fall into your pillow. “I know. I love you too.”

Neither one of you sleep very well. 

+++

Jack’s still standoffish in the morning, but you let it roll off you as best you can. Aaron has a whole day planned - a Saturday, just for the boys - and has been a little conservative with the affection in front of Jack. 

Maybe cooling it off is a good idea...

You’re not sure what you’ll do today. 

The office, maybe? 

Today is full of maybes. 

Aaron offers you a soft smile as he pulls the front door closed behind him. 

+++

You do end up going into the office for a couple of hours, clearing your emails, and getting ahead on consults. You slip any relevant paperwork under Aaron’s door and head home, tapping your fingers restlessly on the steering wheel. 

At this point, Aaron and Jack should be home by now, just like you’d planned. The last thing you wanted to do was wait around for them all day, but you missed them. 

You only hoped Jack missed you, too. 

When you step into the house, you find Aaron at the table working on his computer. 

“Hi, sweetheart.” 

You smile at him, hanging your coat. “Hey, love. I went to the office for a little while to catch up on some stuff.” 

“You’re ahead at work.” 

You wave him off. He’s right, but there was always something to do. “How long have you two been home?”

He checks his watch. “Just over a half-hour, so not too long.” 

There’s an unspoken question and Aaron tilts his head toward the hall. “He’s in his room. He wants to talk to you.” 

With a breath, you cross the room and pad down the hallway, knocking twice on Jack’s door frame. He’s playing with the same LEGOs he had last night, but they’re significantly farther along in construction. “Hey, bud.” 

“Hi.”

“Can I come sit with you? Your dad told me you wanted to talk.”

He nods and clears space for you on the floor. You sit cross-legged beside him, waiting him out. 

He assembles LEGOs for a little while, quiet. When he reaches a decent stopping point, he turns toward you. 

Listen. Count to ten. 

Listen. 

“I’m sorry I wasn’t nice yesterday,” he says, quiet. “I was mad about the Wii and I missed my mom and I got really frustrated.” 

I miss her too, bud. 

Taking the chance that he’s finished after a moment of silence, you reach a hand out. He puts his little hand in yours and you offer him a small smile. “Thank you for your apology, Jack. I really appreciate it, and I forgive you. I’m sorry if I overstepped or if you felt like I was bossing you around. I didn’t mean to do that.” 

He shakes his head. “You weren’t.” 

“Good.” You sigh, looking up at one of the photos of Haley on his short bookshelf. “And buddy, I’m not here to replace your mom. I’m here because I love you and I love your dad, and that always comes first to me, okay?”

He nods. “Yeah. That’s what Dad said.” 

Of course he did. 

“And,” you continue, “I totally understand if it’s a lot to have me around all the time. It’s really different and I know it can be weird sometimes.”

He nods. “Thanks.” 

“Just tell me, okay?” You brush some hair off his forehead while he continues to work. 

He needs a haircut. 

“I will.” 

You press a kiss to the side of his head. “Thank you, baby. I appreciate it.” 

He smiles a little, and you take your leave. 

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