#like i stormed into my room because of 2 minor inconveniences cause i have 0 emotional control left anymore
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anyone else feel like if they stop being upset they lose
#my mom fucked me up good#whenever id calm down she'd go 'see! i told you you just had to do this' blah blah blah#now i feel like if i acknowledge i feel better im gonna Lose#like i stormed into my room because of 2 minor inconveniences cause i have 0 emotional control left anymore#(not that i had much to begin with)#and i feel better enough to go outside and smoke a joint#but like if i acknowledge to dad that i feel better i feel like ill 'lose'#even tho thats STUPID cause he doesnt WANT me to be upset!!!! neither does my mom really but it just.#Hoo.#i have a lot of bad habits when i get upset. one of them is walking away which is both good and bad cause sometimes i Cant or Shouldnt#but then i do anyways lmao#i also tend to get pissed off with peolle for no reason#and i just sit in my room and sulk cause even if i feel better#well you know#anyways my point is i need THERAPY#but i also reject all coping skills because Again: my mom fucked me up Good#not like. seriously but just enough that im a fucked up person :^)#anyways sorry for venting on here cause like i really tried to stop doing that#also this is okay to reblog thats why i put all This shit in the tags
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