#like normally as in just dont be a fuckin asshat

[tiny-chubby-bird]

why do people always feel the need to stir the soup

[shitty-davesprite-daily]

could you give a list of any corvid like attributes you exhibit? -🦩anon

TG: ...

TG: yknow what sure. why not

TG: only because you arent obsessing over me being 'gay' like everyone else on this goddamn website apparently is

TG: ill take bird shit any day

TG: also i had to actually look this shit up so youre welcome for that

TG: getting educational up in this bitch its like national geographic

TG: anyway apparently corvids are 'among the most intelligent birds thus far studied' and 'display remarkable intelligence for animals of their size' so when i call myself a goddamn genius thats wikipedia talking not me being an egotistical asshat

TG: the feathers obviously

TG: usually theyre meant to be like black or blue, but apparently the tropical species are 'brightly colored' so im just gonna assume orange falls into that

TG: being 'omnivorous'? idk i usually just eat what i can find which is apparently a crow thing

TG: yeah see shit like that. ill eat that shit any day

TG: and also like

TG: idk i dont really love people going near my shit?

TG: not in a stupid territorial way just in a chill normal laidback way yknow

TG: i dont know the bird shit isnt really that fuckin important

TG: like i got sickass wings

TG: wing now anyway

TG: and i can make some fucked up sounds sometimes

TG: still just a regular dude apart from that

[fiftyshadesgrl]

Part two

The last few months have went really well, now that sam and i have let our true feelings come out. We are all so much closer now, much more relaxed and work better together. No more risk taking, just well made plans and executing those plans, never deviating.

Now we are on the road heading to a djinn the next state over. I had never hunted one before so i was very anxious about it. Sam and dean had faith in me so thats what gave me courage. I knew how powerful a djinn could be, what they can do thats why i was so anxious dean understood but with three of us he assured me that it would be simple.

When we arrived at the motel sam and i had our own room but also set it up as base. Sam was working on his laptop while me and dean looked over some old properties where the djinn might be. After hours of researching dean had had enough, "ugh, my eyes are starting to cross."

"You mean more than they normally are?" I say glancing up from the papers on the table, sam chuckled.

Dean pointed his finger at me, "dont make me kick your ass."

I crossed my arms over my chest, "im surprised you could do anything with them bow legs of yours."

"Thats it!" Dean yelled as he ran across the room, i dodged his first attempt to grab me as i ducked under the table and crawled out the other side. He jumped over the table just as dam raised his laptop out of the way. Dean scooped me up over his shoulder and started to spin me around tickling me.

"Dean! Stop it!" I yelled as i couldnt control my laughing. Dean and sam both was laughing as dean kept on.

"Take it back!" Dean yelled over my laughter. He dumped me on the bed and held me down continuing tickling me. "Take it back."

"Im gonna piss my pants you asshat!" I yelled. "Babe help me!"

"Dont drag sam into this. Take it back."

"Okay, okay." I said when i could breathe. "I take it back."

Dean stopped and sat back hands on his thighs. "Now say dean is the better than sam."

"Not even in your dreams winchester, now get off!" I shoved against his chest, he stood up and held his hand out to me. I slapped it away and jumped up moving over to sam, he pulled me into his lap.

"It was worth a shot. Now how about we all go out and have a drink." Dean said straightening his flannel. Me and sam looked at each other and agreed that going out for a while is well deserved.

Later that night we were all sitting in the corner in the back of the bar, having drinks and eating nachos, well dean took most of the first batch but this second basket i put up a fight.

As the night went on dean started to get restless. His eyes wandering from woman to woman until he zeroed in on one. He set his beer bottle down, "alright you love birds, time for me to get my groove on."

"Does anyone really say that anymore?" Sam asked as dean placed some bills on the table. Ddean ignored him and walked over to the cheaap blonde standing over at the pool tables. I snuggled closer into sams side as he took another swig of his beer.

"What do you say we take this back to the motel?" He asked me with a hunger in his eyes.

I smiled up at him, "in the words of dean winchester, time to get my groove on." Sam laughed as he put our half of the bill on the table and pulled me out of the booth.

When the cab pulled up to the motel me and sam both were ready to get into the room. I had the room key in my hand but couldnt focus because sams hands were all over me. His lips on my neck, his hands on my hips just underneath my shirt, his erection pressing into my backside. I finally managed to get the damn door open, sams hand slid into my jeans as he nipped my neck.

He closed the door with his foot then turned me around. We were like animals, ripping and tearing at each others clothes until both of us were just in our underwear. He unclasped my bra and threw it across the room before pushing me back onto the bed. I didnt have a chance to get my barings before sam was on me.

His mouth on my nipple as he pinched the other one, my back arched up off the bed sam chuckled. "Oh baby, always so eager." His hands traveledd down my body until they rested where my underwear was. "I hope you dont care for these to much."

Before i could question what he meant he ripped them right off of me and started to devour me. "Holy fuck sam!" I screamed as he hit all the right spots. I yanked his hair no doubt it was painful but it just elicted a growl from sam.

He shoved two fingers inside me as his tongue circled my clit. My body spasmed out of control as my orgasm hit me like a ton of bricks. Before i could get over the first one he climbed up on the bed and flipped me over and shoved himself in me balls deep.

"Oh my god!" I screamed.

Sam smacked my ass hard, "not god baby. Whos fucking you?"

I slammed into me again and i mumbled something even i didnt understand. Another hard smack, "answer me damn it!"

He slammed back into me, hitting my g-spot. "You! Sam! Only you baby!"

"You better fuckin believe it." He growled as he grabbed a fistful of my hair and started slamming into me. My eyes rolled back in my head as my second orgasm hit me fast and unexpextedly.

"One more baby. Give me one more." Sam said as his hips slammed into me with bruising force.

"I...cant....oh sam i cant."

*smack* "yes you can and you will." He pushed my fave down into the mattress as his fingers dug into my hips. Sure enough the third one came and as i spasmed around him i felt his cock twitch as he filled me full.

I collapsed onto bed not able to move, sam flopped down on his back beside me. He pulled me over to where i was laying on his chest. His heart thundering under my ear, he placed kisses on top of my head and on my forehead. He soothed me until my eyes felt so heavy i couldnt keep them open anymore. "Sleep baby." I heard him whisper just before sleep overtook me.

Sams pov

I woke up sometime before dawn, the room was unusually bright for the shades to be drawn. I heard the rain better than i should have. I opened my eyes to the sight of the door to our room barely hanging by one hinge the window was shattered. I looked beside me and (y/n) was gone, all that was left was a small blood blood trail on the sheet where she had been.

@an-unhealthy-obsession @justanotherwinchester @tftumblin @vicmc624 @holylulusworld @jesseswartzwelder

[princebugs]

blind!eddie headcanons!

i did this before but i wanna add more to this!! so here you go!!

- eddie was blind since birth due to some health complications that are still unknown

- his mother was really overbearing because of this, especially after his father passed away from lung cancer

- he still begged his mother to go to school!!! to which it took a few months of convincing but eventually she gave in because who can resist eddie kaspbrak?

- so on the first day of kindergarten, his mom has to drop him directly at the door of the classroom and theres a kid there to help him around

- eddie later learns that the kids name is bill!

- (he likes the name because bill is close to the word blind and he thinks thats funny)

- bill helps him during class and eddie already considers him his best friend

- during recess, bill leaves to go to the bathroom and eddie immediately runs into the bar of a swingset

- he falls onto the ground and cries but a boy apparently holds his hand out for him

- OF COURSE EDDIE DOESNT SEE THE HAND SO HE JUST SITS THERE

- “hey uhh need help?”

- the guy basically shoves his hand into eddies and pulls him up

- later on he finds out that the kids name is richie and that richie liked to do impressions and voices

- which annoys eddie so much but he wouldnt trade richie for the world

- richie and bill always help eddie out during classes and when they have free time, they hang out with richies friend, stanley

- stanley talks a lot about birds and eddie doesnt know what birds look like but he loves listening to stanley describing them!

- (though he still has no fuckin clue???)

- richie and eddie are basically inseparable, but eddie still considers bill as his best friend

- richie considers eddie his best friend but also likes the idea of bill and stan being his best friends too!

- basically, theyre all best friends but bill and eddie are the start of the whole group

- beverly, ben and mike join the group later on

- beverly joins because she had to kiss bill in a play and automatically, she was kind of just squished in with the other boys

- beverly makes clothes for eddie all the time and he has no idea how to compliment her fashion like

- “yeah the uh, the texture is... nice!”

- ben joins because beverly invites him to sit with them at lunch during middle school

- eddie and ben like talking about poetry and they start the poetry club together in highschool!

- mike is homeschooled until highschool but eddie met him by eddie falling onto one of his sheeps and apologizing profusely

- richie has been into eddie ever since they met, eddie has recently started getting a crush during the last year of middle school

- (he thought he had a big crush on bill for a long while there but after kissing him and coming out to him in bills basement, he realized it was more of a brotherly love all along and he's okay with that!)

- richie asks eddie out to sophomores homecoming after a LONG while of them pining for each other

- eddie says yes

- richie constantly worships eddies beauty and eddie has no idea what hes talking about

- richie is so confused and tries to describe the color of the rainbow and he just screams in frustration

- eddie and richie are always close together

- like, richie NEVER leaves eddies side

- (eddie huffs at him but he loves how warm richie is)

- sitting on richies lap is just normal for eddie at this point

- it started by eddie accidentally sitting on richies lap during elementary school when he couldnt find his seat but richie wrapped his arms around eddie and didnt let him go

- eddie is fine with being blind but the only thing he really hates about it is that he REALLY wants to see what richies face looks like

- but for him, seeing things is a concept that freaks him out too

- eddie comforts richie during his anxiety attacks

- and vice versa with eddies panic attacks

- eddie always lets richie lead when they kiss and/or dance together because he doesnt wanna do the wrong thing and scare richie off?

- (but seeing eddie TRY to kiss richie is the cutest thing ever to richie, honestly)

- richie always places his hands either on eddies hips or on his cheeks

- "youre really cute yknow that?"

- "i dont know shit im literally blind you asshat"

- WHEN THEY GET MARRIED ITS THE CUTEST SHIT EVER!!!

[silversunshine2012]

Something to Think About

Disclaimer before we start:  I started writing this because I was bored and got inside my own head a little bit and had to get it out.  There is some talk about religion and politics in here.  Most of this is speculation and observations, but near the end it does get more heated and, depending on your pov, more patriotic.  I don’t normally talk politics, religion, etc, because I don’t want to get into an argument or offend anyone.  So I usually keep my mouth shut.   Please know that I am not trying to start a fight whatsoever.  This is just something I wanted to share that I’ve been writing for about 3-4 hours now instead of doing my school/homework in which I ask you to think.  We don’t think as much as we should and we take things that we read and hear online and on the news, etc. for granted and don’t always fact-check because we’re lazy.  I also want to ask you to think before you read this.  If you think that you will probably get offended by reading this because it has more than just your point of view in it, then please dont read it.  Please just move on with your day and don’t worry about little ole me and whatever over-thinking bs my brain comes up with.  Also, if you do choose to read it, please excuse any and all digressions.  I have a lot up here..

           You know something interesting about the Pledge of Allegiance?  We always say it the same exact way, every single time, like a kid’s song almost.  Like, okay, try something for me.  I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands, one nation under God, indivisible with liberty and justice for all.  How did the voice in your head read that?  Did you hear: “I pledge allegiance..to the flag..of the United States of America..and to the republic, for which it stands..one nation..under God..indivisible..with liberty and justice for all”?  It’s like how we see the lyrics to a kid’s song we’ve heard all our lives and we inevitably hear the tune in our head too.  Like this, “I’m a little tea pot, short and stout…”  Now you’re hearing the whole rest of what you can remember of the song, right?  But if you were to listen to someone who’s never heard this before (“this” referring both to “I’m a Little Teapot” and the Pledge of Allegiance) read the words aloud, it would sound very different.  

           But the thing is, the way we’ve always said the pledge is actually how we have to do it in order to stay in sync with one another.  Whenever a large group of people are all reading the same passage together as one, they pause every few words even when, grammatically, you wouldn’t pause there in the sentence.  And they do this because it makes it ten times easier to know exactly where everyone around you is in the passage so that everyone can collectively follow along.  We say it as if it were a song with no tune and a very boring rhythm.  And with the Pledge of Allegiance especially, because we’ve said it ever since we can remember, and because we’ve always said it the exact same way every single time, we always say it the exact same way every. Single. Time.  I’m being redundant to make a point here.  We don’t just say it the way you would read it, even when we’re saying it by ourselves and there’s no one else to stay in sync with.  And because we say it the same exact way every single time, and because we’ve said it almost every single day since we can remember, the words themselves lose meaning..  

           Like, really, we’re “pledging” or promising our “allegiance” or loyal commitment to a fuckin FLAG first off, which in and of itself seems weird to promise to be loyally committed to a symbol, regardless of what it represents to begin with.  Yes, we’re also pledging our loyalty to the republic it stands for, the US democracy and the Constitution and Bill of Rights that it is both bound to and based on, but all that comes after pledging loyalty to the symbol itself.  Also, it says that the nation stood as one under God, which meant that the founding fathers were Christian to begin with, something we also see clearly in the Declaration of Independence.  “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal and are endowed by their Creator with certain, unalienable rights.”  Then it goes on to say that this one nation is “indivisible,” cannot be divided, which refers to the how the colonies had to unite as one against the British forces during the Revolutionary War, the very point Ben Franklin was trying to make when he said, “We must all hang together, or most assuredly we will all hang separately,” and the political cartoon with the snake cut into pieces that says “Join, or Die.”

However, the way it’s worded seems to suggest that the nation can only be and remain indivisible if it is and remains under God.  Same with “with liberty and justice for all.”  The wording suggests that the nation can only have liberty and justice for all if it remains under God.  

           Something else i find interesting is that, the Bible says in Matthew 5 (I suggest starting in verse 43 if you want to fact check me on this) to “love your neighbor as yourself” and also specifically says “you must also love your enemy” because “If you only love those who love you, what reward will you get?”   Basically, it says to love everyone, because God loves everyone, because God made everyone.  And yet, many people have only experienced hate from Christians because, well first off no one is perfect, but also because there are just some people who are so stubborn and who only see rules, rule-followers, and rule-breakers, rather than people and guidelines for protection, which is what they were meant to be in the first place.  And it’s sad that there are people who use a book that is supposed to be filled with love and use it to spread hate.

           Also, going back to what I was saying before, when we repeat something over and over and over again, it loses its meaning for us.  Like all those little pearls of wisdom we’ve heard a thousand times like, “If at first you don’t succeed..” “The grass in always greener..” “Plenty more fish in the sea” “Blood is thicker than water.”  Those aren’t as meaningful and wise as some, but they were just as irritatingly familiar.  When it comes to the Pledge of Allegiance, we don’t necessarily know what we’re pledging to anymore.  The founding fathers made it so that the government would be subject to change in the future so that it could stand the test of time, and each new generation that became more aware of injustices in our country than the last would be able to speak up and change it.  The nations, groups, religions, societies, etc. that survive the longest are the ones that can adapt to each new generation that comes into it, can adapt to each new struggle it goes through as a whole, etc.

           And, again, going back to the repeating thing, it’s the same with the national anthem.  How many times have you just stood and sang the national anthem as if it was just “Take Me Out to the Ball Game”?  How many Americans don’t even know what part of the war the song is talking about? How many Americans have never even seen this video or at least heard the story about how these people died holding up the goddamn flag because they knew that if it fell, the British side would win.  How many Americans actually realize that the implications behind the Pledge of Allegiance are, at least in part, referring to this story?!  The reason we pledge LOYALTY to the flag today, is because OUR ANCESTORS pledged and either RISKED or GAVE their LIVES just protecting the FUCKING FLAG and MAKING SURE that it never FELL because THEY KNEW, if THAT flag HIT THE GROUND, it would all be over.. FREEDOM would LOSE.  DEMOCRACY would FALL.  AMERICA would DIE, before it even truly began.  If that flag fell, nothing we have here today would be the same.  

           We pledge our loyalty to that flag to honor those that died keeping it upright.  We stand for both the Pledge of Allegiance and the National Anthem because of their sacrifice.  We do not KNEEL, because doing so would DISRESPECT and DISREGARD ALL the sacrifices made by those that would rather “die standing” than “live on [their] knees.”  We STAND up for what we believe is right and rally together as one voice to be heard so that we can make a change. 

           BUT we also sit, and listen, and work together.  We don’t just talk, because when everyone talks, no one listens.  When no one listens, we yell louder.  The louder we yell, the more things escalate.  Peaceful protests turn into two, warring, angry mobs.  Then next thing you know someone gets in their car and plows through both mobs killing 20-some-odd people.  

           We are turning to violence.  Violence among ourselves.  More and more, we are considering ourselves white, black, hispanic, straight, lgbtq+, Christian, athiest, areligious, etc. etc.  More division.  More distancing.  More disarray.  More dehumanizing.  Just a never-ending downward spiral of hate and bickering.  

           This, however, is not new.  Like I mentioned above, the colonies had to purposefully unite as one. Before they preferred to consider themselves Virginians, Georgians, Pennsylvanians, etc.  They had to come together as AMERICANS before they had any chance of winning the war.  

           We today, must learn to do the same.  Yes, there are some shitty people out there.  Yes, there are people who have only had bad experiences with a certain group of people, and so the logical conclusion based on the data they have is that all people within that group are asshats.  However, we need to remember, there are shitheads in every category we have made up for grouping together humans we don’t know, as well as the fact that there are nice people out there in each of those categories too.

           If you did take the time to read this, thank you.  

[turtles-are-queer]

Okay so like pattons a human right

And he moves into this old GGGGIIIAAANANTTTT house

That has demons ghosts and vampires in it

Right

And logans a fucking demon

But patton doesnt take his shit and just becomes a weird roomate

And virgils this ghost boi and hes just kinda there

Like "sup how are ya"

"AAAAAHHH virgil please stop just apearing its spooky"

One day pattons trying to catch this bat in his attic and remys just like "uckin hands off me gremlin" and pattons just "oh! Sorry i didnt realize!" And remys just *"human form" but like a vampire* "ya bitch, lets get some damn starbucks"

Romans his friend

But hes like a witch

But not like the real witches yknow, hes like harry potter wand steryotyp, definetly rides a broom just to be an extra fuck

So like this house is fuckin huge too okay. It was super cheap because ghost vamp and 2 demons. Its supperrr old and like a mansion but its spooky

Patton doesnt know its spooky when he buys it

But the moment he enters the house all 4 of them are just "kay we cant kick this one out look, no ones swept the floor in 5 years, he cleaned the damn window"

Oh yeah okay deceits a demon

But also like hes one trying to be a normal demon but it doesnt fuking work

Like *standing ominously in a hallway with glowing eyes*

Patton: "logannnnn hes doing it again!"

Logan: go to bed deceit, we cant keep doing this

So roman is liek "a moved huh? How is it?"

"Kinda weird? I have a few roomates you should meet!"

"I thought... You were living alone?"

"Yeah thats what i thought too"

Roman comes over and remy just slides down the staircase like "WHO BROUGHT SILVER INTO THIS DAMN HOUSE PATTON YOU K N O W I CANT DO SILVER"

Patton gets a text like "who is wearing the anti demon symbol? Youre upseting de"

Virgils just like "oooooo* breaks a plate on his head*

Patton: "Virgil! This is our guest!"

They all become good friends after a while but the only thing holding them together is

patton

Remy sometimes asks for a drink

Patton gives him starbucks

Remy is always like "ou know thats nowhat i meant" and still drinks it anyway

Roman definetly is over at that house every other night

12 guest bed rooms? Hell yeah sleep overs!

And he does magic ALL. THE. TIME. No thoughts over consequences

Just "hey can i do an explosion spell ive never tried on this apple as it sits on your head?"

"SURE!"

Logan, who has grown attached: no the fuck you wont

" deceit can you please stop the ominous steps! I have to go to work tommorow i need sleep!"

Roman accidently introduces virgil to emo music and suddenly patton has to give virgil a curfew kn when hes allowed to blast music in the basement cause he needs sleep

Roman "AH FUCK A BIRD" *frantically swatting at remy*

Remy: THE FUCK DID YOU CALL ME? THE SECOND YOU TAKE OFF THAT SILVER EARRING IM GONNA FUCKING TAKE ALL OF YOUR BLOOD

Roman yeets another plate into the abyss, smashing it on the fridge. "Boys! Come on please someones gotta replace these plates!"

Roman and virgil: "sorry pat... "

I hate everything my first thought was Patton punishing them with "get on top of the fridge! Get up there!" vine

" this hoUSE IS A FUCKING N I G H T M A R E"

Virgil: "No shit sherlock theres 54 things in this house that could kill you and im not even counting the supernatural yet"

One of the 54 things on Virgil's list is the blender. He does Not Trust It

No one knows when he died, least of all him.  He definetly is suspicious of all technology

Remy uses a perfect mix of old slang and new slang

He cant exactly.. CONTROL some of his demon like qualitys and he hates it. He tries to be profesional and stay calm but then hes crawling on the ceiling and pattons got the spray bottle again and hes like "fuck"

Sometimes tries to murder people

Has tries to murder roman twice

Got the spray bottle

Has stopped

I wouldn't expect anything less

Please tell me he's got a pavlovian fear response to any and all spray bottles now

No not all spray bottles, for instance if he sees a bottle of windex he thinks "thank god, someones cleaning" but if he sees the " bad demon" spray bottle then he immedietly focuses harder on not doing The Thing™

The bottles just filled with Water. Thats it. Its not holy water or anything cause patton doesnt wanna hurt him, but he keeps it in the fridge so its cold water and wakes him up a bit and makes him more aware of what hes doing

Deceit sometimes goes in timeout within a salt circle if hes killed something or someone

Salt circle of shame

Deceit and remy work tagteam. Deceit murders them, remy gets the blood. But they dont just like murder anyone, only peices of shit like sometimes de will be being all spooky in an ally and see some asshat trying to rape someone, immedietly murders them and remy gets a Nice Sip

Virgil knows but doesnt see a reason to bring it up since hes seen alot of murders in his life.

No one knows how

Hes ominous

Only i know for now

Remy apoligises for having virgil watch since he looks and acts like a teenager, but virgil just shrugs and says that. Remy is Suspicious™

He thinks he's kidding at first but it happens again and Virgil is, if possible, even more deadpan about it, and then he /suspects/

Patton is Worried™ when virgil says stuff like that. Like pattons a bit decensitized to death after a while of living with them and one day he like "oh virgi! Dont look over there deceit left another corpse! Ugh its just awful"

"Ive seen worse"

"Virge no-"

Pattin gives logan a pair of his old glasses since logan cant fuckin see

-

Virgil got long hair fuck you

-

Roman introduced virgil to memes. Worst mistake hes ever made

-

“Where you ever human logan?”

“At a time, yes. However, i do not remember anything from that time in my life”

“Was deceit?”

“No, patton. Hes never known a shred of humanity.”

“Who did this to you two?”

“I wish i knew… i would assume only satan himself could turn a man into a hideous beast like me”

“I dont think youre a monster lo..”

“..... Thank you Patton”

-

Logan and deceit eat souls. In this universe, a sould is stored in the heart. Already dead people dont have souls anymore, they have already became a ghost, or moved to an afterlife.

No you cannot eat a ghost.

Souls taste different

Pattons would taste like berries and hot chocolate.

There is a strict “no eating patton” rule set in place by virgil

Yes, this rule does extend to remy

No he cannot have “just a sip”

-

Virgil does NOT like the appliences in the house.

Hes scared of the blender.

After patton had fully moved in, he was wandering around the kitchen one night and pushed a button on the blender

When it started making noise and moving virgil promptly screamed and threw it at the wall

He apoligized to patton once they became friends.

He is scared of the washing machine too

-

Reny started living there about 50 years ago

Virgil TRIED to get him to leave before they could eat him

Remy assured him he had no soul since he was a vampire and just kept coming back to sleep there.

They sorta just accepted it