#lmao i'm annoyed and quite honestly feeling a bit petty

[levbolton]

It is I, anon from earlier today and I can now in confidence tell you that your fics have broken me down into nothingness.

Not only am I stupid and cannot read tags but I repeatedly let myself be comforted by your writing only to be hit with the sad truth at the end. You can’t keep getting away with this /j .Your style is so unique and I can feel the passion you have for the characters as you can see their inner turmoils on the writings. I love how you bring them to life

My personal favourite is Monologue (which is highly underrated btw). I love the dynamic between Fumi and Maki plus Fumi talking about her day made me smile so much. Then cane the gut wrenching feeling about Maki. Honestly you managed to balance the fluff with the angst out so well and I really adored it.

To conclude this annoying fan’s rambling, you are my favourite blue period writer and such a great storyteller. I know how you’ve stated that the fandom is quite inactive (cause it is) but your presence manages to be so outstanding to me. I don’t know why I was too nervous to follow now but I might as well write my letter of appreciation so it can be covered by the bots.

I hope you are able to continue doing what you love and have a great rest of day. 🙃

thanks op, kinda figured bcs i have emails from ao3 and your usernames match

personally 'monologue' is quite the lackluster for me, i wanted to use the concept, i think i wanted to make it about ytyt with yotasuke that would tell yatora about the summer festival only to reveal at the end that yatora was unconscious the whole time so yotasuke wasn't talking with anyone, i got the idea while working on 'a psychological take' (where i wrote already a summer festival so it felt unnecessary to do it again) and at the same time i wanted to write fumimaki (bcs there's literally nothing for this married couple, almost canon i'd say, more canon than ytyt), so i combined both, i was still in a phase where i wanted to kill all characters and make them suffer which i think i did a lot and now i just want to write them relax and be happy (writing depression is hard), so it's not really that original inside my head, but im glad at least someone else likes it (for me billy of tea was way more fun to think about)

tbh i've been thinking about moving on from blp for quite a few months already but i simply can't find something else to interest me the same way ytyt does, which sucks bcs if i don't write then no one will write stuff, rn i want to finish this fic i'm sorking on (i hope i get to 100k), then a oneshot about ytyt soulmates and another oneshot about miki and ayano only, then idk, i think it would be good to retire (not to be petty actually, but i did write 40% of the words in the yatoyota tag on ao3)

fandom isn't really only inactive, it is now a bit (i continuously try to collect blp fans here and on twt, the more the merrier), but i just felt ignored since the anime was airing, again maybe it was the bad timing bcs i started posting my first fic towards the end of the anime when people lost the interest bcs that adaptation is horrible, then in february yamaguchi had covid and from march to july it was complete hiatus and then the whole dj drama (which i'd lie if i said the mob mentality to drop it didn't affect me too although i was the one to uncover the doujinshis on my own weeks before it got to twitter, anyway my idea was: this isn't a piece of media i care about and i am already deeply in love with blue period so whatever, my respect for yamaguchi decreased and i got a passive aggressive attitude towards her until she posted the new year ytyt picture with bunnies this january, now i seriously don't care abt whatever else she drew - also damn i'm really side railing with this)

thanks again for your support, sorry for the long unnecessary text lmao, i have too much free time

[loverboy-ish-archive]

ok hi got back from watching Smile 2022 and it... was... a movie. :/ i don't fully regret going to watch it bc at least i'm doing Something with my time but like... some things bothered about it like i knew it would.

alright so spoiler-free warnings:

ableism. saw this coming a mile away bc the main character's a doctor so :/ although i will say it came from some of the characters saying ableist shit ("mental cases") rather than the actual narrative's message. ... I think. i don't know if the movie was going for an actual message or just Being A Horror Movey.

suicide. first scene (aftermath), hospital scene (happens on-screen And You Can See It), and others of other people (mentioned, shown post-mortem, one video that is Also Graphic).

gore and body horror.

animal death.

alright so. spoiler-filled territory under the cut (+ some more clarification, i guess. mention/implied past child abuse).

this movie made me mad actually quite early on lmao. there is one patient, Carl (who isn't affected by the curse, so he lives he's. Alive), and the interview Rose (the main character) had with him just felt... :/ "i know these things feel real but they can't hurt you" sort of end to their "conversation" idk that feels... like she's a bad doctor like c'mon that's not fucking helping "it's all in your head" type of bullshit.

and, again, other forms of ableism -- other characters calling Rose's patients "mental cases" and the like. -_- was that Fucking Necessary. i mean i GUESS it lends to #realism and possibly even a hint of a critique or an indication to the otherwise uninformed audience that the mental health industry is kinda shit + people should be, idk, nicer or w/e. i'm not gonna give it that much credit.

i don't think the Graphic On-Screen Suicide was necessary. i know it's a horror movie but like. man? on top of that there's also photographs of suicide aftermaths + one video of a suicide in progress. which... alright i guess they're not As Bad.

more petty i guess + poking at plot-holes but: Rose kinda annoyed me. just as a person. girl i know you're running on No Sleep At All + So Much Fear + Trauma but why would you show THOSE photos to your sister. ok tbf she's dealing with it (Badly) so i might not be entirely fair to her (and there was one scene where she was being a bit daft but it was a Dream All Along) but still. yeah idk i'm sorry Rose nvm (but also. the photos. why're you telling your SISTER THIS. C'MON.)

on a neutral note: i was Not expecting an actual monster reveal. the design for the creature at the end (at the Very End, not the Mom Creature) was interesting + tied in with the title, i'll give it that.

on a positive note? i guess? maybe it did have something to say-- mental health is a Thing, you can't really completely heal from trauma (and even guilt -- because Rose, at ten years old, let her mother die -- tbf she was scared of the woman), but you can try to move on with your life and heal as best you can. kinda undone by the ending tho, bc it IS a horror movey and they LOVE twist endings. ah well. btw i did guess it as one of a few possible endings.

the characters... i thought they were fine enough. rose's boyfriend/fiance, trevor, felt kinda flat -- or more like a stock character i guess, Boyfriend Who Doesn't Believe Girlfriend -- which :/ sucks (Even tho it'd be difficult to believe All That LMAO but still tho). ummm the relationship between rose + holly felt real to me, or at least believable. idk i don't Know shit like this + i'm not very coherent LMAO. uhhh i liked rose's therapist, she felt normal + realistic to me.

honestly i think apart from the things that Annoyed + Concerned Me it was an ok horror movie. i'd probably watch a sequel. i wouldn't recommend it tho :/

idk if anyone else has seen it lmk what u think (But also don't feel Pressured to see it.) bc maybe i'm being too harsh on it bc i only just got back like... idk 30 or so minutes ago LOL

[hoozoo]

I’ve mentioned it before, but I’m way more active on twitter - so in case this blog should get shut down thanks to tumblr’s most recent changes, you can still find me there:

@tallihoozoo on twitter ✌

In all honesty, twitter has always been a more “personal”, open and interactive space for me. So while I still upload my art there (actually more than here cause I tend to post more sketches and WIPs) you’ll also find me rambling about dumb shit, as well as a ton of retweets. (Should you decide to follow me there, you can easily hide my retweets and it will probably cut down my spam by 98% lmao)

That being said, I still appreciate everyone I’ve got to meet through tumblr and every ask/comment/tag and note you guys left me, making me feel more welcome. ♥

[cookinguptales]

as someone who has shipped a lot of morally grey to ouright evil characters before i am curious as to what people expect from nandermo in terms of "deserving each other." i see a lot of that in the tag, nandor does not deserve guillermo, N has a lot of groveling/growing/changing to do before he deserves G. and it honestly confuses me because we all know these are not good people, they are very evil and i love that, i want them to be together even the way they are now, but what to people expect?

Yeah, I mean. Honestly, I've shipped far more toxic ships than nandermo lmao. They haven’t even tried to kill each other yet!

I've always kind of known what they are... I mean, I know I tend to write very fluffy fic at times but like... no, they are both pretty terrible people. And frankly, if I had to choose one who was worse, it'd probably be Guillermo. He has far fewer excuses for his behavior than Nandor does. Like... he also manipulated Freddie quite a bit in this episode, lbr. Freddie and Nandor and Guillermo were all kind of assholes, even if Nandor's actions did by far the greatest damage.

Like... being honest with you, I'm annoyed at the writers for such a mean-spirited episode and I'm mad at Nandor for what he did to Marwa, but I'm not that mad about what he did to Guillermo. I hated watching it, but I don't know if I feel angry, exactly. And weirdly, I think Guillermo also doesn't seem that angry. He's sad. He's hurt. He's despondent. He's bitter. But he really reacted with a lot less anger than I expected, especially after that one little spat they had.

He unfortunately knows Nandor better than anyone else on earth. He knows exactly what shade of awful Nandor is. And he gets that Nandor wasn't actually trying to be cruel this time. Maybe it would have been easier for Guillermo if Nandor had been trying to be cruel.

I think that he actually understands Nandor's motivations better than Nandor did... He understands the pettiness and ego and selfishness and covetousness. He understands Nandor's need to take. To conquer, even when it hurts those he loves. He's seen all these things for over a decade. He's seeing them now. And he still didn't leave.

idk. At this point I feel like Guillermo has made his choices and people can want better for him all they want, but Guillermo knows the bed he's made and he still insists on sleeping in it. You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped, and Guillermo has never, ever made healthy decisions in this show. He always chooses to get back into that cage, y'know?

I hated a lot of writing choices in this episode -- like, a lot of them. But I don't actually feel like my shipping took much damage, if any. If anything, Nandor and Guillermo seem more willfully codependent than ever. Just as they always have been, tbh.

[420pogpills]

part 2 of the asks! :) part 1 here

dream gets these moods sometimes, and idk if it's a result of his current stressors, or if it's just his personality, but when i think he sort of feels threatened or shoved to the side a bit, he goes on the offensive. he hates being told someone is better than him, he hates not contributing to success, and i know that sounds kind of negative but i think he just really likes people relying on him and he likes being part of the reason people do well, and that's why i think he loves when george relies on him so much :') and there's nothing wrong with that! but when george jokingly says 'i don't need you' to dream, it seems like his mood instantly falls. then he'd rather antagonise than continue to help.

i've noticed that pattern a lot idk maybe it's just in my head but that's the vibe i get sometimes. when people who rely on him a lot stop relying on him, it just sometimes seems like he doesn't like it. and that's okay, but there's better ways to deal with that i think, rather than go on the offensive and potentially make the mood a lil sour. idk i guess it's difficult to explain when i don't know his actual thought process!

yeah it was just a little uncalled for, i don't know why lately he's been name calling so much lmao something about it just seems so personal and mean. i don't think george cares and it's none of my business, but as a viewer it's not the most fun thing to watch, especially when the mood was so good and everyone was having so much fun. it was one of those moods where i feel like if someone did something annoying, it's better to just let it go and keep enjoying the fun atmosphere, but dream just wouldn't let it go, and it was pretty hypocritical behaviour cause it's the kind of behaviour he berates george for quite often. i love dream but sometimes he is a bit of a twat ❤️

the fandom is just very used to the dynamic of george relying on dream i think. so when george does things by himself and he does it well, people are quite surprised, but when dream and sapnap turned around and started acting like dream was the reason he was doing well - because people are so used to that being the case, they just went along with it? and yeah idk. i mean i've personally seen more people annoyed at dream than agreeing with him or sapnap haha, but that's mainly cause i only look at tumblr now, on twitter i just follow like 3 fans and the rest are cc's and artists, so i haven't seen what twitter was saying, but tumblr recognises george, that he's more than dream's friend and he is a skilled player, so i think that's why so many of us got our feathers ruffled a bit haha

no worries at all, trust me i understand your frustration :') it's good to get it all out haha, once i discuss my frustrations with everyone i swear i find it so easy to let it go afterwards!!! discussing is good for the soul ❤️

honestly yeah i kind of agree. lately, it seems like dream's aggravation or frustration - whether it's something to do with george or not - does kind of feel like george will be on the receiving end of it regardless. like i mentioned this before in a different ask i answered, i feel like dream has been swearing at george a little more than i've ever noticed in the past? usually he calls george an idiot or stupid but it's always so light hearted, but lately he's used 'asshole' 'dickhead', calling him inconsiderate, etc. it is very interesting? i don't know if maybe we're imagining it or if it is really a bit different but yeah. i don't know what george has done to him, if anything :') but i'm not the biggest fan of this lolololol so i hope dream can find his peace again soon LOL idk maybe we're way off or imagining it or whatever haha but idk

yeah george does get underestimated a lot haha, and to be fair i do think he can blame himself for some of it because i do feel like if dream is there, he will rely on him 9 times out of 10. but it doesn't change the fact that he's cracked and he should show it off more. but it's tru, people always remember negative things better than they do positives :(

yeah i think a lot of people get so comfortable, they forget that cc's are still people - people that you are not friends with - so you should respect them like how you would respect a stranger on the street. just because you see dream call george a dick, doesn't mean you should go ahead and call him a dick :') dream has been friends with george for like 6 years now, he knows him personally and deeply, and we are not on the same level. so that idea that 'i can say this because dream said it' etc, is bullshit, because we're on completely different tiers in george's life. you don't have to like him ofc, you can like dream and dislike george in the same breath, but that doesn't mean you need to express that dislike.

ofc, george definitely has a big share of the responsibility for how he is perceived online :') he relies on dream 9 times out of 10. he will try and farm aww's from the chat when someone is going against him haha. but i think when he is truly trying hard, like how he was genuinely trying to win at dodgebolt last night - it was very petty and unfair of dream to try and get in-between that, when george was for once showing the stream viewers that he is good and he is capable of winning! george was trying to have his moment and dream made it about himself and undermined his skill :') it's just a silly thing to me because dream praises him so much, especially at dodge bolt and usually seems so proud when george is trying, so it was strange behaviour to see him turn around and do what he did last night idk idk

gogy is like an onion, he's got many layers! his face is just the very top one :P