#malcom must throw a great party

[roetheninth]

one of the best part of red scrolls of magic is what a crazy random character meet up it was. tessa, johnny rook, adaon, malcom fade, catarina loss, hypatia vex, raphael santiago, lily chen, helen blackthorn, bat velasquez, barnabus hale, aline penhallow. and who could forget ragnor fell

[buffysresources-archive]

╰    ♡    *    SENTENCE  STARTERS    ─     HEATHERS    !

feel  free  to  change  pronouns  if  /  where  needed  .    trigger  warnings  for  some  nsfw  stuff  ,  death  ,  suicide  ,  etc  .

‘  (   name  )  told me she teaches people real life  .  ’ ‘  real life sucks losers dry  .  ’ ‘  if you want to fuck with the eagles  ,  you have to learn to fly  .  ’ ‘  so you teach people how to spread their wings  &  fly  ?  ’ ‘  you’re beautiful  .  ’ ‘  what is your damage  ?  ’ ‘  i need you to forge a hot  &  horny  ,  but realistically low key note  .  ’ ‘  you don’t have anything for her either  .  ’ ‘  come on  ,  it’ll be very  .  ’ ‘  the note’ll give her shower nozzle masturbation material for weeks  .  ’ ‘  i’ll think about it  .  ’ ‘  don’t think  .  ’ ‘  pilgrims  ,  indians  ,  tater - tots  .  it’s a real party continent  .  ’ ‘  i think i’d probably miss my own birthday for a date  .  ’ ‘  if you’re going to openly be a bitch  -  .  ’ ‘  why can’t we talk to different kinds of people  ?  ’ ‘  fuck me gently with a chainsaw  .  ’ ‘  do i look like mother theresa  ?  ’ ‘  does it not bother you that everyone in this school thinks that you’re a piranha  ?  ’ ‘  like i give a shit  .  ’ ‘  they all want me as a friend or a fuck  .  ’ ‘  i’d change my life  .  new clothes  ,  new haircut  ,  new house  ,  new home  .  ’ ‘  how sad  !  blowing all your cash on two days of trying to be hip  .  ’ ‘  that’s got to be the most spooky ass question i’ve ever heard  .  ’ ‘  this is the part i hate  :  the waiting  .  ’ ‘  i’d say we’re like twenty minutes from major humilation  .  ’ ‘  deep down all teenagers are the same  .  ’ ‘  didn’t you see the breakfast club  ?  ’ ‘  what do i get out of being friends with losers  ?  ’ ‘  i give them a piece of a winner  &  they stain me with loserness  .  ’

‘  i think we should use the money for an end - of - the - world - get - together  .  ’ ‘  we could invite guys  .  ’ ‘  i’d pay madonna one million dollars to ride my face like the kentucky derby  .  ’ ‘  she should be paying me  ,  though  .  ’ ‘  don’t tell me  .  crest would be stained with loserness  .  ’ ‘  a dime increases the time  !  a buck brings good luck  !  ’ ‘  i’m sorry  ?  what are you oozing about  ?  ’ ‘  that episode with the note back there was for all of us to enjoy  .  ’ ‘  you seem determined to ruin my day  .  ’ ‘  we made a girl want to consider suicide  .  what a scream  ,  what a jest  .  ’ ‘  come on you jerk  .  ’ ‘  you know you used to have a sense of humor  .  ’ ‘  a true friend’s work is never done  .  ’ ‘  color me nauseous  .  ’ ‘  geez  ,  don’t listen to them  .  ’ ‘  you know holden caulfield wouldn’t put up with their bogus nonsense  .  ’ ‘  god (name)  ,  drool much  ?  ’ ‘  greetings  &  salutations  .  ’ ‘  this may seem like a stupid question  .  ’ ‘  there are no stupid questions  .  ’ ‘  that’s the stupidest question i’ve ever heard  .  ’ ‘  let’s kick his ass  .  ’ ‘  too old for that crap  .  let’s give him a good scare though  .  ’ ‘  you going to eat this  ?  ’ ‘  what did your boyfriend say when you told him you were moving to sherwood  ,  ohio  ?  ’ ‘  it seems to have an open door policy for assholes though  ,  doesn’t it  ?  ’ ‘  what did you say dickweed  ?  ’ ‘  i’ll repeat myself  .  ’ ‘  god  ,  they won’t expell him  .  they’ll just suspend him for a week or something  .  ’ ‘  they should throw his ass in jail  .  ’ ‘  all (name) really did was ruin two pairs of pants  .  ’ ‘  can you bleach out urine stains  ?  ’ ‘  you seem pretty amused  .  ’ ‘  i thought you were giving up on high school guys  .  ’ ‘  never say never  .  ’ ‘  did you have a brain tumor for breakfast  ?  ’ ‘  anyway  ,  i can say never to high school  .  ’ ‘  no way  ,  no day  !  ’ ‘  give it up girl  !  ’ ‘  god  ,  that was unbelievable  .  ’ ‘  so tonights the night  .  ’ ‘  blow it tonight girl  &  it’s keggers with kids all next year  .  ’ ‘  so what was the first week of spring vacation withdrawal like  ?  ’ ‘  any contestants worth mentioning  ?  ’ ‘  there’s kind of a dark horse now in the running  .  ’ ‘  will somebody please tell me why i read this spy crap  .  ’ ‘  because you’re an idiot  .  ’ ‘  you going to pull a big gulp with that  ?  ’ ‘  if your nice i’ll let you buy me a slurpee  .  ’ ‘  you know your 7-11 speak pretty well  .  ’ ‘  there’s always a 7-11 any town  ,  any time  .  ’ ‘  the extreme always makes an impression  .  ’ ‘  did you say a cherry or coke slurpee  ?  ’ ‘  he seem to enjoy tearing things down more than putting things up  .  ’ ‘  must be rough moving place to place  .  ’ ‘  everybody’s life’s got static  .  ’ ‘  is your life perfect  ?  ’ ‘  it’s not perfect  .  ’ ‘  i don’t really like my friends  .  ’ ‘  i don’t really like your friends  .  ’ ‘  it’s like they’re just people i work with  &  our job is being popular  &  shit  .  ’ ‘  maybe it’s time for a vacation  .  ’ ‘  throw your coats on the bed  .  ’ ‘  that exam was so bogus  .  ’ ‘  did you girls bring your partying slippers  .  ’ ‘  she loves to party  .  ’ ‘  i want to kill  &  you have to believe it’s for more than selfish reasons  .  ’ ‘  you have to believe it’s for more than selfish reasons  ,  more than a spoke in my menstrual cycle  .  ’ ‘  you have to believe me  .  ’ ‘  so are you a cheerleader  ?  ’ ‘  it’s so great to be able to talk to a girl  &  not have to ask what’s your major  .  ’ ‘  so when you go to college  ,  what kind of subjects do you think you’ll study  ?  ’ ‘  let’s go back to the party  .  ’ ‘  you’re just so hot tonight  .  ’ ‘  i can’t control myself  .  ’ ‘  so what do you say we head up to my room  &  have a real party  .  ’ ‘  that pecker actually scored something on his own  ?  ’ ‘  (name)  ,  ever do cocaine  ?  ’ ‘  ever since phil collins did that anti - drug thing on mtv i refuse everything  .  ’ ‘  jeez  ,  right  ,  then why don’t i do drugs  ?  ’ ‘  hey  ,  don’t run away now  .  ’ ‘  seventeen is the last year mom buys the twinkies  .  ’ ‘  christ  ,  i can’t explain it  .  ’ ‘  i understand i must stop (name)  .  ’ ‘  how’s my little cheerleader  ?  ’ ‘  now i know everyone at your high school isn’t so uptight  .  ’ ‘  i don’t feel so great  .  ’ ‘  i have a little prepared speech i give when my suitor wants more than i’d like to give him  .  ’ ‘  save the speeches for malcom x  .  i just wanna get laid  .  ’ ‘  i just wanna get laid  .  ’ ‘  you don’t deserve my fucking speech  !  ’ ‘  (name) says you’re being a real cooze  .  ’ ‘  i feel awful  ,  like i’m going to throw up  .  ’ ‘  can we jam  ,  please  ?  ’ ‘  i sound like a psycho  .  ’ ‘  let me dream of a world without (name)  ,  a world where i’m free  .  ’ ‘  you stupid cunt  !  ’ ‘  you goddamn bitch  !  ’ ‘  you were nothing before you met me  !  ’ ‘  what’s my thanks  ?  ’ ‘  i get paid in puke  !  ’ ‘  lick it up  ,  baby  .  lick  .  it  .  up  .  ’ ‘  monday morning you’re history  .  ’ ‘  dreadful etiquette  .  i apologize  .  ’ ‘  i saw the croquet set - up in the back  .  up for a match  ?  ’ ‘  no wonder you looked so mangled when i came through the window  .  ’ ‘  i’ve always treated (name)’s teen queen power play as bullshit  .  ’ ‘  but i’m really scared  .  ’ ‘  who am i going to eat lunch with on monday  ?  ’ ‘  i sound like an after school special  .  ’ ‘  that was my first game of strip croquet  ,  you know  .  ’ ‘  it’s a lot more interesting than just flinging off your clothes  &  boning away on the neighbor’s swing set  .  ’ ‘  what a night  .  ’ ‘  what a life  .  ’ ‘  now blah - blah - blah is all i do  .  ’ ‘  i use my grand i.q. to figure out what gloss to wear  &  how to hit three keggers before curfew  .  some genius  .  ’ ‘  killing her won’t solve anything  .  ’ ‘  everybody would be cast fucking adrift  .  ’ ‘  i’ll pray for rain  .  ’ ‘  it was good for me too  ,  sparky  .  ’ ‘  just saying it’s not hard to end a life  .  ’ ‘  there’s a difference between the most popular girl in school  &  dead  .  ’ ‘  i guess i don’t know what the hell i’m talking about  .  ’ ‘  i know exactly what the hell you’re talking about  &  you’re right  ,  you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about  .  ’ ‘  i know exactly what the hell you’re talking about  .  ’ ‘  you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about  .  ’ ‘  let’s just grow up  ,  be adults  ,  &  die  .  ’ ‘  i’d like to see (name) puke her guts out  .  ’ ‘  let's just concoct ourselves a little hangover cure that'll induce her to spew red  ,  white  ,  &  blue  .  ’ ‘  what’s the upchuck factor on that  ?  ’ ‘  don’t be a dick  .  that stuff’ll kill her  .  ’ ‘  pull the plug on that shit  .  ’ ‘  she’d never drink anything that looks like that  .  ’ ‘  she won’t be able to tell what she’s drinking  .  ’ ‘  you’re not funny  .  ’ ‘  we both said a lot of things we didn’t mean last night  .  ’ ‘  how the hell’d you get in here  .  ’ ‘  i whipped this up  .  family recipe  .  ’ ‘  did you put a phlegm globber in it or something  ?  ’ ‘  i’m not drinking that piss  .  ’ ‘  i knew this stuff would be too intense  .  ’ ‘  intense  ?  grow up  .  ’ ‘  you think i’ll drink it just because you call me chicken  .  ’ ‘  just give me the cup  ,  jerk  .  ’ ‘  no shit  ,  sherlock  .  ’ ‘  i just killed my best friend  .  ’ ‘  what are we going to tell the cops  ?  ’ ‘  fuck it if she can’t take a joke  .  ’ ‘  stop kidding around  .  ’ ‘  i’m going to have to send my s.a.t. scores to san quentin instead of stanford  .  ’ ‘  i’m just a little freaked  ,  all right  ?  ’ ‘  you got what you wanted  ,  you know  .  ’ ‘  it’s one thing to want somebody out of your life  .  ’ ‘  it's one thing to want somebody out of your life  .  it's another thing to serve them a wake-up cup of liquid drainer  .  ’ ‘  we did a murder  .  ’ ‘  adolescence is a period of life fraught with anxiety  &  confusion  .  ’ ‘  people think just because you’re beautiful  &  popular  ,  life is easy  &  fun  .  ’ ‘  nobody understood i had feelings too  .  ’ ‘  i die knowing no one knew the real me  .  ’ ‘  that’s good  .  have you done this before  ?  ’ ‘  call me when the shuttle lands  .  ’ ‘  let’s talk emotions  .  ’ ‘  i realize now i wasn’t really boring  ,  she was just dissatisfied with her life  .  ’ ‘  (name) was cool  ,  but cruel  .  ’ ‘  the good looks  &  bad manners gave her power but it could not give her happiness  .  ’ ‘  it’s just so unfair  !  ’ ‘  you could actually be digesting food  .  ’ ‘  fuck it  .  ’ ‘  she always said you couldn’t accessorize for shit  .  ’ ‘  i thought she was your usual airhead bitch  .  guess i was wrong  .  ’ ‘  guess i was wrong  .  lot of us were  .  ’ ‘  what a waste  .  ’ ‘  oh the humanity  .  ’ ‘  do i deliver or do i deliver  ?  ’ ‘  hurry up  ,  we’re going to get caught  .  ’ ‘  does this have something to do with menstrual cramps  &  shit  ?  ’ ‘  that was seriously warped  .  ’ ‘  she hated you  !  you hated her  !  .  ’ ‘  what are you smiling at  ?  ’ ‘  goddamn .  will somebody please tell me why I smoke these damn things  ?  ’ ‘  this is a tragic thing  &  sometimes i have a hard time dealing with it  &  stuff  .  ’ ‘  why did you kill such hot snatch  .  ’ ‘  that’s a joke  ,  man  .  people are so serious  .  ’ ‘  hail mary who aren’t in heaven  ,  pray for us sinners  . . .  so we don’t get caught  .  ’ ‘  i just want my high school to be a nice place  .  ’ ‘  did that sound bitchy  ?  ’ ‘  that pudwapper just stepped on my foot  .  ’ ‘  i’m sure your friends are happy to hear that  .  ’ ‘  i hope it isn’t going to be one of those nights where they get shitfaced  &  take us to a pasture to tip cows  .  ’ ‘  oh shit  ,  cowtipping is the fucking greatest  .  ’ ‘  when i get that feeling i need sexual healing  .  ’ ‘  yeah  ,  right  ,  asshole  .  ’ ‘  what is this shit  ?  .  ’ ‘  seven high schools in seven states  &  the only thing different was my locker combination  .  ’ ‘  don’t smile like that  ,  jesus  !  ’ ‘  our love is god  .  let’s go get a slurpee  .  ’ ‘  let’s go get a slurpee  .  ’ ‘  this thing leaves a bad taste in my mouth  .  ’ ‘  i’m sorry  ?  i don’t get it  .  ’ ‘  don’t shut up  .  i’d like to know just what i did  .  ’ ‘  i guess my emotions took over  .  ’ ‘  we won’t be using blanks this time  .  ’ ‘  you can’t be serious  ?  ’ ‘  hey listen  ,  my bonnie  &  clyde days are over  .  ’ ‘  now prepare to be a little disappointed  .  ’ ‘  shut the fuck up  ,  all right  .  ’ ‘  lighten up  ,  dude  .  ’ ‘  in those woods is some of the finest pussy in the school  &  we don’t even have to buy it a hamburger  &  a diet coke  .  ’ ‘  so do we just start fucking  ?  ’ ‘  i was hoping you’d rip my clothes off me  ,  sport  .  ’ ‘  did you miss him completely  ?  ’ ‘  i always hear gunshots when i’m high before noon  .  ’ ‘  life’s a crazy bitch  .  ’ ‘  life’s a crazy bitch  ,  don’t try to analyze it  .  ’ ‘  you took the suggestion as an opportunity to play yet another round of let’s laugh at the hippie  .  ’ ‘  you believed it because you wanted to believe it  .  ’ ‘  your true feelings were too gross  &  icky for you to face  .  ’ ‘  i did not want them dead  .  ’ ‘  ah  ,  young love  .  ’ ‘  my teen angst bullshit now has a body count  .  ’ ‘  the most popular people in the school are dead  .  ’ ‘  everybody’s sad  ,  but it’s a good kind of sad  .  ’ ‘  it’s god versus my boyfriend  &  god’s losing  .  ’ ‘  kill the jukebox  .  ’ ‘  i may be a geek but i have my pride  .  ’ ‘  why are you dissing me  ,  (name)  ?  ’ ‘  i’m trying to redefine the high school experience  .  ’ ‘  you’re ignoring the high school experience  .  ’ ‘  people are dead  &  all you can think to do is whip up some warped pity party  .  ’ ‘  if we’re going to ever build respect for each other  ,  it’s gotta be something  . . .  something real  .  ’ ‘  it was chaos  .  fucking chaos  .  ’ ‘  chaos is great  .  ’ ‘  chaos is what killed the dinosaurs  ,  darling  .  ’ ‘  we scare people into not being assholes  .  ’ ‘  our way is not our way  .  ’ ‘  i’m telling it to you  !  you  !  ’ ‘  nothing good can come from suicide  ,  from murder  ,  from death  .  ’ ‘  you can be so immature  .  ’ ‘  we beat the bitches  .  ’ ‘  do you like your father  ?  ’ ‘  never given the matter much thought  .  ’ ‘  in some sick way  ,  we unclogged the sinuses of the school  .  ’ ‘  if we’re going to keep the school healthy  ,  it’s gotta be through something having to with life  ,  not death  .  ’ ‘  whoa  ,  metaphor tennis anyone  ?  ’ ‘  if you put a nazi in a concentration camp  ,  does that make you a nazi  ?  ’ ‘  that’s it  ,  we’re breaking up  .  ’ ‘  you can’t bring them back  .  you must know that  .  ’ ‘  i’m not trying to bring back anyone except maybe myself  .  ’ ‘  to think there was a time when i thought you were cool  .  ’ ‘  if you can’t deal with me now  ,  just stay home  .  ’ ‘  if you can’t deal with me now  ,  just stay home  &  shoot your t.v.  ,  blow away a couple toasters or something  .  ’ ‘  just don’t come to school  &  don’t mess with me  .  ’ ‘  you’ll be back  !  ’ ‘  where did you get these  ?  ’ ‘  what is this  ?  blackmail  ?  ’ ‘  i’ll give you a week’s lunch money  .  ’ ‘  i don’t believe it  ,  i’m winning  .  ’ ‘  don’t get cocky  ,  girl  .  ’ ‘  i know i’m not as exciting as your other friends  .  ’ ‘  your daydreams are a lot better than my realities  ,  believe me  .  ’ ‘  nice guys finish last  .  i should know  .  ’ ‘  nice guys finish last  .  ’ ‘  you’re so polluted  .  ’ ‘  i don’t see what gives you the right to lecture  .  ’ ‘  some people just don’t matter  .  why should those who do carry their weight  ?  ’ ‘  some people just don’t matter  .  ’ ‘  it’s not even your turn  .  ’ ‘  maybe by the time we head back  ,  your tampon’ll be flushed  .  ’ ‘  christ  ,  doesn’t anybody knock  ?  ’ ‘  so i’m a dark horse  ,  huh  ?  ’ ‘  you make me blush  .  ’ ‘  did you come to tell me something  ?  something nice  ,  remotely apologetic  .  ’ ‘  i say it’s about time we got down to doing what we do best  .  ’ ‘  just finish your drink  &  get out  .  ’ ‘  these little programs eat up suicide with a spoon  .  ’ ‘  if we’re not going to watch that program  ,  can i put on my game  ?  ’ ‘  hey kids  ,  make your parents  &  teachers feel like shit  !  ’ ‘  get the respect in death you’ll never get in life  !  ’ ‘  get up off the floor  ,  your dress is getting filthy  .  ’ ‘  everybody cares about youth  ,  not the individual  .  ’ ‘  all we want is to be treated like human beings  ,  not like guinea pigs to be experimented on  &  not like bunny rabbits to be patronized  .  ’ ‘  all we want is to be treated like human beings  .  ’ ‘  i do not patronize bunny rabbits  .  ’ ‘  treated like human beings  ?  is that what you said little miss voice of a generation  ?  ’ ‘  just how do you think adults act with other adults  ?  ’ ‘  adults can be horrible to other adults  .  ’ ‘  when teenagers complain that they want to be treated like human beings it’s usually because they are being treated like human beings  .  ’ ‘  i guess i picked the wrong time to be a human being  .  ’ ‘  you’ll live  .  ’ ‘  another case of a geek trying to imitate the popular people of the school  &  failing miserably  .  ’ ‘  i said i was sorry  .  ’ ‘  you are out of control  .  ’ ‘  (name) couldn’t take the heat so she got out of the kitchen  .  just think what a better place the world would be if every nimrod followed her cue  .  ’ ‘  just shut up  &  turn on the radio  .  ’ ‘  sometimes i feel like i’m on that island  &  gilligan can be just so stupid sometimes  .  ’ ‘  dude  ,  you’ve got to remember if it wasn’t for the courage of the fearless crew  ,  the minnow would be lost  .  ’ ‘  god has cursed me  ,  i think  .  the last time i had sex  ,  the guy killed himself the next day  .  i’m failing math  ’ ‘  the last time i had sex  ,  the guy killed himself the next day  .  ’ ‘  i’m failing math  .  ’ ‘  we’ll crucify her  !  ’ ‘  my whole life is a mess  .  ’ ‘  i was supposed to be captain of the cheerleading team  .  ’ ‘  i can’t get him out of my head  .  ’ ‘  are we going to the prom or to hell  ?  ’ ‘  give me a break  .  ’ ‘  what are you trying to do  ?  kill me  ?  ’ ‘  what are you trying to do  ?  sleep  ?  ’ ‘  suicide is a private thing  .  ’ ‘  you’re giving your life away to become a goddamn statistic in u.s. fucking a today  .  that’s got to be the least private thing i can think of  .  ’ ‘  if everyone jumped off a bridge  ,  young lady  ,  would you  ?  ’ ‘  if you were happy every day of your life  ,  you wouldn’t be a human being  ,  you’d be a game show host  .  ’ ‘  if you were happy every day of your life  ,  you wouldn’t be a human being  .  ’ ‘  let’s knock off early  .  buy some shoes  ,  something lame like that  .  ’ ‘  people love me  !  ’ ‘  color me stoked  ,  girl  !  ’ ‘  people love you but i know you  .  ’ ‘  so some people need different kinds of convincing than others  .  ’ ‘  jealous much  ?  ’ ‘  why can’t you just be a friend  ?  why are you such a megabitch  ?  ’ ‘  why can’t you just be a friend  ?  ’ ‘  why are you such a megabitch  ?  ’ ‘  why are you pulling my dick  ?  ’ ‘  wanna go out tonight  ?  ’ ‘  i knew you’d come back  .  ’ ‘  it’s over  ,  (name)  !  over  !  grow up  !  ’ ‘  i don’t get it  ,  you were wrong  !  i was right  !  ’ ‘  you can’t ever find a place nice  &  peaceful because there isn’t any  .  ’ ‘  get off my bed  ,  you sick psycho  .  ’ ‘  you think you’re a rebel  ,  you’re not a rebel  .  you’re a sick psycho  .  ’ ‘  you think you’re a rebel  ,  you’re not a rebel  .  .  ’ ‘  do you think you’re a rebel  ?  ’ ‘  you say tomayto  ,  say tomahto  .  let’s call the the whole thing off  .  ’ ‘  i usually go for whole sentences myself  ,  but hey this is perfecto  .  ’ ‘  you’re not listening  !  i’m not on your side  .  ’ ‘  this knife is filthy  .  ’ ‘  you don’t get it  ,  do you  ?  ’ ‘  society nods its head at any horror the american teenager can think to bring upon itself  .  ’ ‘  let’s hope she’s rubbing noses with jesus  .  ’ ‘  is this turnout weak or what  ?  ’ ‘  he’s wrong but i’m going to teach him what’s right  .  ’ ‘  i’m going to stop (name) if it’s the last thing i do  .  ’ ‘  i can’t believe you did it  .  i was teasing  .  ’ ‘  sure  ,  i climbed up here to kill you  ,  but first i was going to try  &  get you back  .  ’ ‘  we coulda toasted marshmallows together  .  ’ ‘  hey  ,  why so tense  ?  ’ ‘  sorry tiger  ,  i’m a little busy  .  ’ ‘  get a job  .  ’ ‘  oh my god  ,  another damn pep assembly  .  ’ ‘  may i see your hall pass  ?  ’ ‘  i knew that loose was too noose  !  i mean  ,  noose too loose  !  goddamn you  !  ’ ‘  like father  ,  like son  .  ’ ‘  you didn’t say simon says  .  ’ ‘  live by the sword  . . .  ’ ‘  you think just because you started this thing  ,  you can end it  ?  ’ ‘  you want to wipe the slate clean as much as i do  .  ’ ‘  so maybe i am killing everyone in the school because nobody loves me  .  ’ ‘  you have a purpose though  !  remember  ?  ’ ‘  let’s face it  ,  the only place different social types can genuinely get along with each other is in heaven  .  ’ ‘  there’s a school that self - destructed not because society didn’t care  ,  but because that school was society  .  ’ ‘  is that deep or what  ?  ’ ‘  i’ll let you put it in your diary  ,  babe  .  free of charge  .  ’ ‘  you know what i want  ,  babe  ?  ’ ‘  you know what i want  ,  babe  ?  cool guys like you out of my life  .  ’ ‘  but don’t worry  ,  these here were ich luge bullets  .  ’ ‘  color me impressed  .  ’ ‘  you really fucked me up  ,  (name)  .  ’ ‘  you’ve got power  ,  (name)  .  power i didn’t think you had  .  ’ ‘  the slate is clean  .  ’ ‘  pretend i did blow up the school  ,  all the schools  .  now that you’re dead  ,  what are you gonna do with your life  ?  ’ ‘  (name)  ,  you look like hell  .  ’ ‘  (name)  ,  my love  ,  there’s a new sheriff in town  .  ’ ‘  my date for the prom kind of flaked out on me  ,  so i thought if you weren’t doing anything that night we could go to the video store  &  rent some new releases or something  .  maybe pop some popcorn  .  ’ ‘  my date for the prom kind of flaked out on me  .  ’ ‘  i thought if you weren’t doing anything that night we could go to the video store  &  rent some new releases or something  .  maybe pop some popcorn  .  ’

[imgilmoregirl]

Vowed For Eternity (Chapter 23)

AO3 Link

Notes: So, one more chapter left! I'm really happy with how this one turned out and I really hope you enjoy it too. Thanks to everybody that kept up til here. Sending love to you all!

A Thing Of Beauty

The last thing Belle ever expected to see at Avonlea was the big party which was being thrown on that night in honour to Fiona and Malcolm's wedding. Not that she hadn't participated from lots of parties and balls, but her father had always hated Rumple and he seemed to think any less of Fiona, but it all changed when the two of them saved Colette. King Maurice loved his daughter which meant he loved his grandchildren as much as he did Belle, regardless of who was their father and apparently knowing that both Rumple and Fiona were willing to do anything to protect the babies, made him realise they weren't such bad people.

So, ever since that first dinner they shared together, Maurice had become close friends with Malcolm and Fiona. Belle had gone back to the Dark Castle alongside with her husband and children, because they must settle back at their own home, but they exchanged letters very often and, even though her father couldn’t leave his kingdom to pay her some visits, Rumple’s parents made sure they appeared at every opportunity they got, to spoil the babies and spend some time with them.

Their relationship with Rumple was still awkward and seemed fragile, however they were doing their best to approach their son without forcing any greater contact, showing themselves happy with each conversation they shared. Belle felt a little cheerful with the progress they were making and she didn’t let herself forget she also had a lot to mend in her own relationship with her husband.

In the first days after they went back home, Rumplestiltskin and Belle divided their days between taking care of the babies – getting themselves used to their new sleepless routine – and sharing long deep conversations whenever they could. Their obvious lack of trust in each other was a problem that needed to be overcome and they talked about their insecurities with hope it would help them understand the other better.

He released the Seer from her prison, opened up as much as he could for Belle and took care of their children in such a tender way that nobody who see him with them would ever say he once was the Dark One. And, as the months went by, they watched Colette and Baelfire grown, learning new things every day, filling their days with happy giggles and sweet nonsense babbling. Neither Rumple, nor Belle had been happier than they were now.

But having a night only for themselves after dedicating all of their days to the children seemed nothing more than fair. Belle had been slightly hesitant about going to that wedding, both because it was the first time she would leave her babies with some maids and because she didn’t feel exactly comfortable in her velvet green dress.

After full ten months, she had lost all of her pregnancy weight, but that didn’t mean her body was back to where it was before she got pregnant, there were new curves everywhere and the dress, being tight as it was, only accentuated them, which got her thinking that everybody’s eyes were on her, when they clearly weren’t. But feeling self-loathing wasn’t much her thing and after a while she forgot about what she was wearing and enjoyed the ceremony and the party.

The brunette looked around, trying to locate her husband after he said he was going to get some drinks for them, when she spotted Fiona, spinning on her white long-sleeved dress with Colette giggling in her arms. Belle sighed, rolling her eyes at the view as she approached her mother-in-law with a little smirk playing on her pinkish lips.

"What is the bride doing with a baby?"

"She seemed hungry," Fiona said, moving the little girl, so she was being held by one of her arms and the other could be free for her hand to stroke her chubby cheek. "And look at this precious little face!"

Glancing to the small tall table by their side, Belle found what brought the baby so quickly to her grandmother’s arms: a bowl full of smashed bananas, one of the only things he children could eat with their only pair of teeth. And teething was a terrible period she wanted to be overcome as soon as possible, because whenever one was to come, the babies would scream for endless hours and nothing would soothe them.

"Fiona, we have maids tonight for a reason. Colette and Baelfire can make it without family cuddling them all the time for a few hours."

"Ah ah," Colette babbled, stretching herself in the table’s direction, meaning to get the bananas.

A bigger smile stretched in Fiona’s lips as mumbled to her grandchild I a childish voice: "You want more, don't you?"

But Belle knew that if Colette started to be fed now, she wouldn’t let Fiona go anywhere, because she would associate her grandmother with food for the rest of the night, so she reached to pick the baby from the fairy’s arm, placing a kiss on the top her daughter’s head.

"Alright, enough fruits," she stated, looking straight at Fiona when she added softly:  "Go dance with your husband."

Fiona chuckled, her glance lost in somewhere Belle couldn’t manage to locate immediately.

"I think you'll have to take him away from Rumple and Bae first."

Then, she finally saw the two men Fiona had been watching, kneeled on the floor with baby Baelfire between then, leaning on his father’s hand as he took shaky steps into his grandfather’s arms.

"I can't believe it," the brunette gasped.

"That's alright Belle, you know I've been happier these past few months than ever," Fiona assured her. "And the whole family is part of this happiness."

"Well, I'm happy to know that, but yet, it is your wedding day and you need to spend some time alone with Malcom," Belle insisted, already moving herself to cross the hall. "Come on, I'm going to get this baby from him."

Rumple and Malcolm were laughing happily at Bae’s achievements, watching as he moved clumsily between them, always steading himself by getting a hold in one of them. She cleaned her throat, calling her husband’s attention, who lifted his amused eyes to her with a huge smile surging on his lips.

"Belle, look at this, he is almost walking!"

"Yeah, it will take no longer for him to be running around everywhere,” she guaranteed, already knowing for her boy’s advances that he would soon find the right confidence to walk without any support, “but for just tonight, he is going to sleep."

Belle picked Baelfire up, struggling to keep a hold on both babies now that they were bigger and heavier, however there was nothing more special than having both of them this way, reaching for each other like old friends.

"But - " her husband started to protest, both he and his father looking terribly sad that she had taken their entertainment away.

"Gods, they are not toys and you are not children," Belle pointed out, holding the babies closer to her chest. "Go do something wicked like you used to!"

Turning around, she carried the children away from the main hall where the party was happening, being immediately followed by the two maids that should have been watching for the babies. Belle could have given them back to the two women, but she actually preferred to put them to sleep herself, so she went straight to the nursery her father had set for the babies and sat on the rocking chair, calming Bae and Colette down until they were fighting to keep their eyes open and failing, falling into sleep.

She kissed their foreheads and finally allowed the maids to take the twins from her, laying them on the cribs. Only then, she allowed herself to stand up and leave the room, however as she was making her way back to the great hall, Belle felt a pair of arms curling around her waist, probably brought to her by magic.

"Something wicked, huh?" Rumplestiltskin inquired, pressing a kiss to her neck. "Do you have a soft spot for the darkness, sweetheart?"

Leaning against his body Belle closed her eyes momentarily, trying to remember the last time they got to have a proper night together, but only remembered about quick rushed fumbles, in which both were too eager and worried the babies would wake up to spend much time worshipping the other.

"Maybe," she murmured, feeling his hands gripping tighter at her hips when a burst of magic took them away from the corridors.

When she opened her eyes, Belle realised they were back to her childhood chambers where they were staying while in Avonlea. Rumplestiltskin started to open the back of her dress, sliding his hands through her soft skin. He had been drinking down the beautiful image of her in that gorgeous dress the whole evening and now he was more than anxious to slowly take it out of her, knowing there would be no interruptions tonight.

"Should I show you what is left of the Dark One?"

One of his hands cupped her breast through the fabric of her gown, massaging it as he sucked at her throat, causing Belle to moan and press herself more firmly against him, making his body twitch with desire.

"Please," she whimpered.

An evil grin took his lips as he grabbed the green fabric and throw the dress apart, tearing it until he had Belle exposed to him to her belly, then he pulled the great of the ruined gown down, leaving her completely bare to him, which made him feel himself hardening. She was breath-taking and he longed to love each part of her perfect form.

"Beautiful," Rumplestiltskin breathed.

He stood before her and captured her lips in his, allowing Belle to slid his waistcoat, then his shirt, until she had exposed his chest and could press herself against him, groaning in his mouth when her plucked nipples made contact with his now smooth human body.

"I love the feel of your skin against mine," she murmured, kissing his jaw. "I can't believe you still want me."

A frown formed on his face as he gently pulled her away just enough so he could look deep into her eyes.

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Because my whole body is changed," Belle answered in a shaky voice, fighting against the sudden need to cover herself. It was silly, she knew because they had already done this after she had the babies, but yet, every single time brought a new insecurity up and she couldn't help but feeling slightly unworthy of her husband's touch. "I have larger hips, larger breasts, my belly will never look the same... I'm just huge now."

Placing both hands on her waist, Rumplestiltskin took some steps forward, dragging her to bed and making her fall against the mattress as he settled himself above her, admiring the beauty she apparently couldn't see in herself anymore.

"No. Belle, you're gorgeous," he assured her in a tone so full of adoration, that she believed him. "I love how you looked when we first married and I love how you look now. Each change on your body happened to bring our children into this world, and I couldn't be less pleased with them."

His words were like a burning flame to Belle's body, sending heat to her womb and making her grow wet for him. The way he purred such lovely things to her ear while his hands caressed her curves gave her some renewed confidence, although it would still take some time for her to accept her new self. She could feel her husband's desire brushing against her inner thigh and she wanted nothing more but to pull his trousers down and unite them as one, like it was meant to be.

"Keep talking like that," Belle started, "and I'll have you locked in this room for the rest of the week."

"I'd prefer if we go back to the Dark Castle. Then you could lock me in our own Chambers," he replied.

In need of some pressure against her core, Belle folded her legs behind Rumple's backside, the leather of his black trousers brushing at her wetness and making her moan.

"You know, my father said he is now considering you a good successor for the throne," she said a little breathlessly.

"I'm sorry to disappoint him, but I'm very happy with the life I have," Rumplestiltskin said chuckling, but the sound stopped, becoming a gasp, when Belle's hand slipped through the fabric of his clothes touching his hard member. "Oh, sweetheart..."

With a wave of his hand, he was left naked to her and Belle felt grateful to that because his cock made contact with her entrance and she writhed beneath him, stroking his length and hearing him pant against her neck. Rumple took her hand away starting to rub at her clit, as he coated himself with her juices before slipping in with a gasp of pleasure.

"You are half of my soul, Rumple," she murmured when he started to move within her, each friction of their bodies making a new wave of bliss take her. "For the whole eternity."

"Yeah, my love," he agreed with a groan, "we are vowed for eternity."

And as their movements became more erratic and their cries louder, Belle clung herself to her husband knowing that in the past, when they made that vow, she never truly expected to love him, and yet she did, more than she could ever put into words.

In that night the experienced the wonderful effects of reaching their peek together, her walls clenching around him and immediately milking him of his seed, the light bursting behind the eyes of both of them as they murmured the other's name in a complete state of ecstasy. Then, they laid side by side, talking about the wedding they had just left and the future they had ahead.

It was really late when Belle slipped off the bed, pulling on a nightgown and silently walking to the nursery, where she surprisingly found both babies awake. The brunette picked Bae and placed him on his sister's crib, watching as he stared at her with uncertainty at first, before he got a grab of her nose, which luckily didn't cause Colette to cry, but to giggle and try to grab his back.

She laughed at the sight of the children playing, babbling to each other with eyes shining with happiness. It didn't take long for her to hear the door behind her opening and Belle didn't even need to turn around to know who was there, it was too easy to guess and she was glad to feel her husband's hands laying on her shoulders.

"What are you doing?"

"Watching them," Belle said, pointing at the babies. "Look, they are talking to each other."

Rumple slid to the empty space on the stool where she was sat, encircling her waist with an arm and allowing her to lay her head on his chest.

"They will be good friends," he mumbled with a smile. "I think it will be good for them to grow up together this way, because they will never feel alone."

He had felt so lonely during most of his life that he was genuinely happy to have twins, because he knew whatever the future brings, Colette and Baelfire would have one another. If they did it right, then they would learn to care about each other and never leave one alone.

"You know, we'll always be here for them too," Belle said poking his belly provocatively.

"Aye," Rumplestiltskin agreed, "but I intend to have some time alone with you too."

She smiled, her mind rushing back to some hours ago when they were making love in another room, moaning in each other's arms. Belle loved her children more than anything in this world, but she had to concur with Rumple; they needed their time as a couple, and not just to be in bed, but also to talk and to grow their relationship strong.

"Your parents can always take care of these two," she suggested, "they love them."

Rumplestiltskin turned around, needing to look right on her eyes for what he was about to say.

"The thing is, sweetheart, that I don't intend to spend much more time here."

"What do you mean?"

"Would you travel with me?" He proposed. "Whatever destination you choose, there we will go,"

Belle blinked in awe, she couldn't believe it. She remembered telling him about her dreams and aspirations, but she never thought he would truly hear it, at least not in order to make them real, mainly now when they had two babies to take care of.

"Are you serious?"

"I have never been more serious about anything in my life," Rumple laughed.

"Yes," she said without thinking twice, throwing her arms around his neck and spreading kisses along his face. "Yes, yes, a thousand times, yes!"

The former Dark One felt delighted with her reaction and held her closed as she continued to eagerly kiss him and Baelfire dropped Colette on her back at her crib, causing the baby girl to explode into guffaws.

"I'm glad it excites you."

"Of course, it does," Belle assured him, but then she pulled away with some concern appearing on her face as she glanced at the crib. "But Rumple, what about the babies?"

"We don't need to go now, we can wait until they are toddlers, walking and babbling real words to show them the world too."

"So, they will come?"

What a foolish girl she still was, he thought. Rumplestiltskin would never leave a part of his heart behind and that was what the three people in that room were: a big glowing part of his heart. He couldn't go anywhere without them for more than just a couple of hours and he would never be separated from them by his own will.

"Sure, we are a family," Rumplestiltskin remarked.

"Yes," Belle nodded in conclusion leaning to press another kiss on his cheek, "and that is all I need."

[hashtagblogfan]

Ten Startup Tips To Success From Jeff Bezos Amazon Founder

Ten Startup Tips To Success From Jeff Bezos Amazon Founder

In August 2004, FastCompany published an article titled, Inside The Mind Of Jeff Bezos, written by Alan Deutschman. Although the article is informative, it is the accompanying sidebar that has remained with me over the succeeding years. Under the heading, “The Book On Bezos,” the callout lists ten actionable and impactful nuggets of startup advice.

    I review these tenets with my entrepreneurial students at UC Santa Barbara at the beginning of each quarter to reinforce many of the key topics we will cover in the following weeks. They are listed below augmented with quotes from Jeff Bezos taken from various points in his career.

      Establish A High Hiring Bar  — You’re Creating An Enduring Culture

“I’d rather interview 50 people and not hire anyone than hire the wrong person.” 

“Cultures aren’t so much planned as they evolve from that early set of people.”

As discussed in Hiring Entrepreneurs, the impact of each new hire during your startup’s early days is tremendous. A mis-hire at the outset of your company can irreversibly alter the trajectory of your corporate culture. If you hire sharks, you cannot expect them to act like dolphins.

    Be Stubborn And Flexible

“We are stubborn on vision. We are flexible on details…. We don’t give up on things easily. Our third-party seller business is an example of that. It took us three tries to get the third-party seller business to work. We didn’t give up.”

“If you’re not stubborn, you’ll give up on experiments too soon. And if you’re not flexible, you’ll pound your head against the wall and you won’t see a different solution to a problem you’re trying to solve.”

This advice is easier said than done, as it is difficult to know when you should be flexible with your vision and when you should remain dogmatic to your ideals. As noted in Optimistically Pessimistic, successful entrepreneurs are indifferent as to the specific tactics they must employ to accomplish their fervently held strategic objectives. If your culture rewards those who seek the truth, your team will be prone to objectively identifying tactical course corrections.

    Obsess About Customers, Not Colleagues Or Competitors

“We see our customers as invited guests to a party, and we are the hosts. It’s our job every day to make every important aspect of the customer experience a little bit better.”

“There are multiple ways to be externally focused that are very successful. You can be customer-focused or competitor-focused. Some people are internally focused, and if they reach critical mass, they can tip the whole company.”

As Jeff points out, hiring right-minded people who will reinforce the attributes of your corporate culture is crucial. In this case, if enough people enter your organization with a self-serving mindset, such people will eventually dictate that selfish behavior is the norm and it will become part of the de facto culture. By obsessing on serving your customers, you can create a Long Spoon culture in which employees feed each other, rather than feed on each other.

    Know When To Throw Away The Organizational Chart  

“The great thing about fact-based decisions is that they overrule the hierarchy. The most junior person in the company can win an argument with the most senior person with regard to a fact-based decision. For intuitive decisions, on the other hand, you have to rely on experienced executives who’ve honed their instincts.”

In the early days of a startup, the Core Team must accept input from all levels of the organization, rather than be wedded to the artificial hierarchy of an organizational chart. Although this can be a bit chaotic, the free-flow of ideas during an adVenture’s Beach Volleyball days is often crucial to its eventual success.

Additionally, startups are constantly evolving and it is not unusual for them to be restructured several times before they reach maturity. At Expertcity (creator of GoToMyPC and GoToMeeting, acquired by Citrix), our VP of Product and Customer Experience led a number of teams during his seven-year tenure including Professional Services, Customer Service and Product Management. As noted in How To Maximize Your Value At A Startup, I also held a variety of positions while at Expertcity. Flexibility and putting the company first were intrinsic aspects of our culture.

Get Good Advice — And Ignore It (aka: Know When To Throw Away The Rule Book)

From the start, Amazon had an audacious goal – to sell virtually every book online. Before launching Amazon, Jeff consulted with several publishing experts, none of whom appreciated the Internet’s eventual ubiquity. They applied a rearview mirror perspective to Jeff’s proposal and attempted to dissuade him from pursuing such an encompassing strategy. Their advice was to focus on best-selling books and a handful of popular genres – the same approach which had been successful for large retail booksellers.

“Every well-intentioned, high-judgment person we asked told us not to do it. We got some good advice, we ignored it, and it was a mistake. But that mistake turned out to be one of the best things that happened to the company.”

By offering an inventory which far surpassed anything else available at that time, Amazon endeared itself to its early users, who happily granted the company priceless word-of-mouth promotion. If Jeff and his team had launched a more prudent, scaled-back site, it is arguable they would have never achieved the critical mass that eventually led to the company’s widespread market acceptance.

  Don’t Chase The Quick Buck  

“Sometimes we measure things and see that in the short term they actually hurt sales. But we do it anyway, because we believe that the short-term metrics probably aren’t indicative of the long term.”

As I discuss in Entrepreneurs Should Go For The Quick Buck – Then Stop, there are situations in which a startup can generate profitable, near-term revenue that does not support, and may even undermine, its long-term strategy. In some instances, it is reasonable to generate such revenue as a means of financing your business. The toughest aspect of such opportunities is weaning your company off these  “bad profits” and focusing on opportunities that may not have an immediate payoff, but will drive long-term enterprise value.

    The Two Pizza Rule

If improperly administered, meetings become counter-productive, especially as an organization grows beyond its initial startup phase. In order to avoid the meeting frenzy that can overtake a growing startup, Jeff imposed the Two Pizza Rule early in Amazon’s life. This guideline dictated that no more people than can be comfortably fed by two pizzas should meet at any one time. This encouraged task groups to be limited to five to seven individuals.

There is usually a direct correlation between a meeting’s length and the number of participants – the larger the group, the longer the meeting. Thus, smaller meetings facilitate efficiency and accountability. I worked with a team from Amazon a couple years ago and they proudly told me that the Two Pizza Rule was still in place, although they conceded they were forced to relax it, “from time to time.”

    Growth Happens In Bounds And Leaps — Of Faith

The very creation of Amazon was the result of a leap of faith. Jeff left a comfortable Wall Street career to enter a world he knew little about. He was not an expert in technology, inventory logistics or publishing. Yet, like container shipping tycoon Malcom McLean, Bezos felt that the idea was so ��obvious and compelling,” he had to leap.

“The framework I found which made the decision incredibly easy was what I called – which only a nerd would call – a ‘regret minimization framework’. So I wanted to project myself forward to age 80 and say, ‘Okay, now I’m looking back on my life. I want to have minimized the number of regrets I have.’(If I did not start Amazon) I knew that that would haunt me every day.”

Understanding the power of a thoughtful leap of faith, Jeff encouraged his employees to take their own bounds into the unknown by creating a culture that did not castigate well-reasoned risk taking.

    Be Simpleminded  

”You have to use your judgment. In cases like that, we say, ‘Let’s be simpleminded. We know this is a feature that’s good for customers. Let’s do it.’”

Ask Kevin O’Connor, Founder of FindTheBest and DoubleClick, points out in his interview, business is simple. Economically solve a problem that matters and everything else will take care of itself.

Because of his grounding as an investment banker, Jeff appreciated the value of hard data. However, he also understood that data has its limitations. As such, Jeff encouraged early Amazon employees to not overly intellectualize the company’s problems. When in doubt, Amazon employees were told to deploy logical, common sense solutions that were in the best interest of its customers.

    Add Up Lots Of Little Advantages

Web-based businesses must compete in the blinding light of total transparency. They cannot rely on discovering a propriety methodology that they can protect via intellectual property common law. Every time Amazon made a change to its website, whether it be modifications to its customer acquisition funnel, upsell techniques, customer service, etc., it was instantly broadcast to its competitors.

This caused Jeff and his team to focus on constantly making the less evident back-office processes, as well as the consumer-facing aspects of its business, incrementally better. Numerous small changes, any one of which had a small impact on inventory costs or customer conversion metrics were compounded when combined with other small improvements. A company that is constantly improving, even in small ways, is a difficult company to beat.

These small, back-office changes eventually led to the technological expertise underlying Amazon Web Services (AWS), by far the most successful public cloud computing platform. Analysts predict that AWS revenues will eventually exceed Amazon’s retail sales. Thus, such “small improvements” will undoubtedly create more intrinsic value than Jeff ever envisioned when he took his initial leap of faith.

  Ten Startup Tips To Success From Jeff Bezos Amazon Founder

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