#maybe go offline for a bit and maybe delete tumblr before i do anything

[haleigh-sloth]

Okay. I wasn’t gonna bite and feed into this ridiculous behavior but clearly you’re missing my point.

And I deleted my previous response because it was pretty bitchy and I feel it was overkill, but I don’t feel that what I’m about to say is gonna be any better tbh.

You sound really immature first off. Your expectations of me, someone you don’t know, are a bit outlandish, and you’re just assuming that I have the same relationship with the internet that you do. I don’t btw, and I can tell just based off this interaction.

Listen, I know you think you’re being reasonable—but you’re not.

You are asking and expecting that I:

Background check every internet person I either directly or indirectly interact with, on here, and on other platforms??? Many of which I do NOT use

Just take your word for it without any visual evidence for me to go off of—which I won’t do because I’ve had untrue things said about ME to other mutuals on here, and I’m glad they took it with a grain of salt

OR alternatively if you were to give me a Twitter handle—you’re expecting me to go put in the work myself and do the investigating

But I have a better idea: why don’t YOU compile these concerns and show me privately? To avoid this whole mess?

Also—don’t twist things. “You wouldn’t believe this and that because its Twitter”. That isn’t what I said. I said—I do not use Twitter, so why would I know? WHY WOULD I KNOW? Please tell me. I never said I don’t believe it—but again you will not convince me by just sending an anonymous message. You have to do better than that. Show me this person is fully knowledgeable of the accounts they’re endorsing—show me the horrible things people are doing before expecting me to engage in cancel culture.

Let me tell you what really pissed me off about your first message:

You’re asking as if I’m supposed to know already. THAT is fucking ridiculous and that is what really spurred me into insufferable bitch mode.

I’m gonna ask you one more time: Do you really expect everyone online to thoroughly stalk and investigate every account they interact with?

I can tell you right now if I were to go through the tags for a fandom, I might come across a gorgeous piece of art and reblog it, not knowing that the particular account is associated with all kinds of weird shit. It could happen. It does happen. It HAS happened.

No, I’m not responsible for background checking every account that I think has decent posts. And you deeming my level of righteousness based off of whether or not I do that is laughable.

No, just because I reblog or someone reblogs from me does it mean that I’m super chill with everything they do online. But I’m gonna reiterate—I don’t know what everybody on here does. Of the people I follow on this website, I personally know 5 of them in real life, and a couple I’ve spoken to enough privately to get to know them enough to consider friends. The rest are all literal strangers.

I’m not telling you I like those things being accused, I’m not telling you I don’t straight up believe you and will ignore the issue if there is one, but you have failed to do your part.

You are not helping anything by sending anonymous messages. You think you are, but you’re not. Maybe take it up with that person themselves. That’s the mature thing to do. And more effective. Not coming to me about it.

I’m gonna tell you this one more time: I go off of what I see on tumblr. If someone is a freak outside of this website, I won’t ever know. And you thinking that I’m responsible for being in the know of that is absurd.

I know it may not seem like it, because I never shut up on here, but I DO have other things to do besides background check and stalk people online. I do have some semblance of a life, actually. I work two emotionally taxing and exhausting jobs, I have two dogs to take care of, I have my personal time spent offline, I have family and friends to talk to on a personal level.

When I get on here, I post, read, reblog, like, whatever. I don’t investigate other people. So my advice to you is if this is an issue that you personally have come across, go about it the right way. Please. Don’t just assume you’re credible behind anon. And maybe, idk, call that person out? Directly? Get their side first?

Idk. I used to be an investigator for the state and we kinda had to get all sorts of information before coming to a disposition on whether or not something happened. So yeah no, I don’t just take everything I’m told at face value. Forgive me for not doing that as I would really hope other people would show me the same respect before trying to cancel me for accusations.

Have a nice day.

[dontgotothenetherworld]

ap psychology

anonymous asked:  Can I request readers putting all her studying off till the week before AP exams and she starts studying an unhealthy amount, like sometimes forgetting to eat all day because of it and even made herself sick from stress over it but reader refuses to complain because she did it to herself and Lydia's just there helping her review and making sure she takes time to care for herself ect? Bonus if Reader thinks she did bad and Lydia assuring her she did fine and has an 'i told you don't moment? 

anonymous asked: Totally didn't request that bc that's my situation-

for some reason when i tried to queue this w/ the original ask, tumblr wanted to put the cut in the ask and i couldn’t delete it

this is out of date now, but i was uninspired to write for a hella long time sorry. also! i’m going to draw from my experiences w/ ap this year, and the only ap exam i had to take was psych, so that’s also going to be the case for reader :)

also, i feel like my lydia is a bit out of character? idk it’ll probably take a while to get back to the way i used to write her.

1303 words

cw: femreader. food

you cursed under your breath. months ago, months! you told yourself you would start studying for your ap exam. you only had the one exam to study for, so you told yourself that if you just did a little bit everyday, you would be fine.

but here you were, about three days until your ap psychology exam, and you hadn’t studied any of it. you had hardly even watched the videos your teacher had posted as the digital learning content. but to be fair, the stuff he was talking about in them were the last unit or two of psych, and you wouldn’t have to worry about them, because you weren’t going to be tested on them.

you groaned and dragged your feet downstairs, to where you hid your backpack. the friday weeks ago, when your school told everyone that classes would go digital for a few weeks because of the coronavirus, your teacher had come prepared. he gave everyone that showed up to class, which, granted, wasn’t that many but still- a huge packet covering everything that you had studied this year. it was some forty pages long.

okay, it was, like, thirty five because you crossed out the pages about personality and disorders. which was a shame, because those are the units that everyone takes psychology to learn about. no one goes, “oh boy, i can’t wait to learn about how to test if a baby has depth perception!” or “i can’t wait to learn about all the different types of visual illusions!” but whatever.

you flipped to page thirty five, to see how many questions you were in for. just over 250, except that’s counting all the charts as individual questions. yeah, that makes sense. one and a half pages of listing what researchers discovered what is equivalent to answering which cortex of the brain processes visual stimuli.

wait a minute. lydia was also taking psych. studying sucks, but if you could do it with your girlfriend, that’d be so much less painful.

you texted her, “hey lyds, have u finished the psych packet yet?”

”yea i finished it yesterday, why?” she texted back almost immediately.

shit. looks like you’ll have to suffer through this alone. “nvm”

you looked at the time, 1:46. damn, already? it felt like you had only just woken up. you made yourself a coffee, and set up shop on the desk you have never used in your bedroom, with laptop open beside you. you planned on googling everything, rather than going through your notes, mostly because you forgot where you put them, but this would still take ages.

an hour passed, and you felt like you were dying on the inside. if you had to answer one more question about behavioral psych, you were going to scream. behavioral psych is by far the worst part of psychology! watson and skinner be damned! people are people not some computer code! people have feelings! you can’t just ignore them! and the feeling you were feeling right now was not a good one!

you wanted to stop, but you weren’t sure if you stopped now if you’d be able to finish the packet. so you kept on going.

you went another five hours, taking five minute tik tok breaks every hour to keep you sane. you looked at the clock, and realized you hadn’t eaten anything today. you grabbed a box of cheez-its and made your way back upstairs, and went back to work. this time, you ate a cheez-it every time you finished a question, or you filled out a row in a chart.

you didn’t know when you fell asleep, but you woke up in the morning with about half the packet filled out. considering the exam was in one day, and four-ish hours, you thought that was good.

as you made your morning coffee, you checked the messages lydia had sent you. “are you doing okay? normally we talk a lot but…” “wait, are you working on the study guide?” “y/n! please take breaks! remember! you need food!” “and water!”

you sent back, “if i eat my cheez-its, and i drink my coffee while i study, then i don’t have to take breaks.”

you went back to your desk, and plugged your phone in across the room so you wouldn’t be distracted. but also because you forgot to charge it before you passed out, so it was at three percent, because apparently you had kept it open to tik tok all night, and the video just kept looping. oops.

for a while, the studying seemed easier. you felt like you had less to do, and you didn’t need to worry about getting it done in time, because you had more than enough of it. but because you didn’t need to rush, you became more productive.

you finished the second half of the packet by six that evening. you do admit, you got a bit lazy in the last few pages, but it was done!

shit. studying isn’t just writing stuff down, you have to read it over, right? you don’t really study that much.

but you decided to take an hour or two’s break for… breakfast? dinner? maybe even lunch? whatever, leftover pizza, because you had just only now just realized the intense rumbling in your stomach.

you checked your phone for the first time in hours. you were actually kind of proud of yourself. you usually were on your phone every waking hour, which was probably a problem, but you had shown enormous restraint… by spending every waking hour staring at your laptop. it’s all about choosing your battles.

you quickly dismissed some twitter notifications before tapping on a new message from lydia. “babe, i’m getting really worried about you, please call me when you see this.” you furrowed your brows. worried? about you? why?

you called lydia, and she picked up nearly immediately.

”y/n!” she gasped with relief, “don’t do that to me again!”

you felt stupid for wondering what she was talking about, but you kind of needed to know, “what do you mean?”

”you’ve been offline for hours, and i couldn’t get to you! and then when i heard what you were eating, that got me worried. have you eaten today?”

”three slices of pizza right now.” you swallowed a bite.

”is that your first meal today?”

”unless you count coffee, yeah. i’ll do better tomorrow, i promise. speaking of tomorrow, we’ve got the psych exam, and i need to keep studying. i’ll call after the exam, so like three?”

”y/n.”

”yeah?”

”you do realize this exam is online, right? and at home?”

”uh, yeah.” you swallowed.

”and you have both a laptop and a phone?”

”lydia, what are you saying?” cheating. she was definitely talking about cheating.

”i’m saying, that you don’t really need to know the definitions, because our dear old pal google can be there to help you out with those. and you’re smart, so i assume you know the concepts.”

”you think very highly, of me, my dear.” you took another bite of pizza. “so, what you’re saying is, i wasted two days studying?”

”yes, that is exactly what i’m saying.”

”shit. wait, why were you studying?”

”ugh, because i am nowhere near as good as you at being able to understand things.”

”you know, definitions explain the concept too.”

”what are you saying?” asked lydia.

”i think we’ve both wasted a lot of time studying when we didn’t need to.”

”fuck.” lydia breathed.

”yeah, we’re both idiots. do you wanna watch something on netflix? you haven’t finished parks and rec yet, right?”

”no, i just finished an episode before you called me.”

”which one?”

”season four, episode seven.”

”wait, is the next episode smallest park? we need to watch that, like, now.”

@meangirlsx @meangirlmurphy @eliza-is-confused @boredomimi @book--butterfly

[creideamhgradochas]

Thanks to the lovely @interestedbystanderwrites​ for taking the time to answer these! Get to know more about lovely Cass, go give her a follow and then show her some love!

These questions are from this list. You should check it out, there’s 50 questions all together and they’d be great to ask your favorite fic writer!

1) How old were you when you first starting writing fan-fiction?

Ha! I was a teenager and it was Backstreet Boys – and smut didn’t exist the same way it does now but that’s another opinion for another day. What I wrote then was cutesy and romantic, probably because that was what I was daydreaming about, I guess. Just a reminder that my blog is NSFW if you’re under 18.

2) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer.

I think I can get more depth from an OC but you also risk the Mary-Sue and you may pigeonhole your OC in race, sexuality etc. That can really open a can of worms with the reader, which is wholly understandable. Reader inserts are great in the way you can make it 100% person to the reader. They should imagine themselves (if that’s their choice) and not feel that the writer has alienated them in any way somehow but it is still difficult to please everybody.

3) What is your favorite genre to write for?

I like fluff – I like things that make you smile at the end, give the reader a little cuddle to maybe brighten their day.

4) If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why?

One that never made my masterlist – a Spider-Man super angst titled “How Long Do You Want to be Loved?”. I thought it as okay, pretty good even – but I guess people just want Bucky or Sebastian smut haha I hear you all!

5) When is your preferred time to write?

Morning when the little guy is napping ☺ Evening is hard because it’s when I play adulting catch up… or try not to fall asleep on the couch.

6) Where do you take your inspiration from?

I have a very overactive imagination, always have. And for most of my fics, I guess it’s pretty obviously the beautiful aesthetics of Sebastian Stan and to a lesser extent, Bucky Barnes.

7) In your Time Only Flies When You’re Around Series, what’s your favorite scene that you wrote?

Chapters 27 and 28 of TOFWYA – more so 28 as you get a pretty interesting insight into Sasha’s and Sebastian’s ways of coping when they’re out of sync. Long story short, they’re a mess.

8) Have you ever amended a story due to criticisms you’ve received after posting it?

Luckily – none! The joys of a smolblog maybe?

9) Who is your favorite character to write for? Why?

I love writing for Buckster – he’s a complex devil and has a lot of layers to work with and a body to die for. Thumbs up for the material, Sebastian.

10) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why?

As per mentioned before – Peter Parker. That fic scarred me.

11) How did you come up with the title for the Time Only Flies When You’re Around Series?

It’s actually a song lyric as are the first few chapter titles: Belinda Carlisle – Valentine

I made a rule about you, I made a plan // For getting my feet back on the ground // Bury my face in clouds, for hours on end // But time only flies when you're around

12) How did you come up with the idea for the Time Only Flies When You’re Around Series?

I was just writing some stuff, pissfarting around and all of a sudden I’d written something similar to what Chapter 22 ended up being and that’s how it all began. 150k words of nonsense really.

13) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them?

Many – but there is a long Bucky multichap fic that deserves more of my attention. As his story has evolves via MCU, the story has changed a little.

14) Are there any stories that you’ve written that you’d really love to do a sequel to?

I write one shots to TOFWYA, I don’t think I could write the sequel to it though. I’ve considered a full fic for Take Me to the Water but I doubt I will for an AU. Any sequels will be little one shots so at this stage, there is nothing planned.

15) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently?

I ended Next Year very kitsch – I regret the last sentence as it currently is: You gave him a small smile, overwhelmed by his words. “I love you too, Bucky Barnes.” Blurgh.

16) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire?

How much time do you have for me to talk about @whostheblondegirlwriting​? Truly. My fandom soul mate. We are separated by far too many kilometres and time zones, but between her job and me mummying, we’re chatting at all hours of the day. She is a true gem and I adore her.

17) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it?

Luckily, it’s not available on A03 or Tumblr, but it’s still online elsewhere because I thought about it a few weeks ago – it was a Lords of Dogtown fic… and it was not good. Saying that, anything before that I would cringe at anything I’d written anyway ha!

18) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence?

Definitely music or the sound of the baby monitor that I find quite soothing.

19) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story?

Argh. “How Long Do You Want to be Loved” messed me up. Too many parental feels.

20) Which part of your Time Only Flies When You’re Around Series was the hardest to write?

The proposal. I went over it a thousand times. I thought, should it be romantic, should it be grand, should it be this or that? How it happened, just a couple in love, in the city they love, being themselves just seemed to fit when it finally came together.

21) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow?

I occasionally outline – but mostly I just write, write, write and then start toying with it afterwards. I’m constantly chopping and changing, but I’m not pedantic about planning. It isn’t that kind of fic. Other multichaps I put a bit more planning and emphasis on.

22) What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fan-fiction?

You’re only as good as your last fic and its reblogs. If you’re going to get hung up on likes/reblogs/comments, you’ll never publish something again. But it can be bloody disheartening at times.

23) Do you have a story that you feel doesn’t get as much love as you’d like?

Time Only Flies When You’re Around? Haha busted my ass on that beast for over a year. It has the hits but likes and comments are encouraging when received. When. I always considered publishing it on Tumblr, but I don’t know. It’s freely available on A03.

24) In contrast to 23 is there a story which gets lots of love which you kinda eye roll at?

Smut talks – I think Heatstroke is a little silly. But it gets hits.

25) Are any of your characters based on real people?

Nope – any characters, inc OC’s are all fictional. I don’t know if I could handle people in my real life if they were like my OC’s!

26) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten?

Any body that takes the time to leave a ‘yes!’, ‘omg’ to paragraphs of reiterating your story back to you – it’s amazing! Taking the time to leave a writer a comment makes our day.

27) What’s the harshest criticism you’ve gotten?

It still makes me laugh when I read it, not quite verbatim but it was along the lines of ‘I loved this fic but it’s gone a total 180. I’ll see how you continue but you know, I’m probably out of here’. While I know you can’t please anyone, it’s a strange comment. I’m old enough to appreciate constructive criticism. This was neither here nor there, but still hilarious!

28) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest?

Back to my love, @whostheblondegirlwriting, we’re constantly taunting the other or beta’ing each others stuff when we have time to help the other (let alone write our own stuff!).

29) Do people know you write fan-fiction?

In real life? No. On this hellsite? I have made some amazing writing friends!

30) What’s you favorite minor character you’ve written?

Ollie in TOFWYA – she’s a completely stereotypical New Yorker, brash, in your face and on the other hand, Sasha’s best friend in the world and they’d do anything for each other. If you knew Ollie in real life, you’d absolutely hate her.

31) What spurs you on during the writing process?

People simply enjoying your work and letting you know is the most amazing aphrodisiac. I’ll never stop writing – whether it’s for myself or for other people to enjoy. Don’t ever be scared to let a writer know if you’ve enjoyed their work or if you haven’t, a writer should be able to accept your constructive criticism and will probably appreciate your feedback if you take the time to provide it respectfully! If you’re going to go on anon and talk shit, just don’t bother. It’s boring, childish and completely unoriginal. Shows true testament to your personality offline.

32) What’s your favorite trope to write?

Friends to Lovers. THEY WERE FRIENDS AND NOW THEY ARE… LOVERS!

33) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about?

Not a clue – but will assume it’s Backstreet Boys-related!

34) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?

Smut will get you the hits but fluff is forever.

[rotationalsymmetry]

One thing I’ve noticed having been on here a lot during idk the past year maybe? A significant number of people who spend a lot of time on here (tumblr) feel conflicted about it or are pretty sure they should spend less time on here. Or on social media/the internet in general.

(I’m one of them. I can see some positive things about being on here of course, but it can get out of hand pretty fast. Like kudzu.) So, some thoughts on that.

Absolutes and hard-line rules (like “only between the hours of x and y”) work for some people some of the time. Personally every so often, I’ll delete the app on my phone, and even if I let myself go on tumblr on my laptop (or going on tumblr on my phone through a web browser rather than through the app) I still end up using it a lot less. If you think strict rules for yourself or apps that restrict your access to certain apps/sites at certain times will help, it’s a thing you can try. If you really want to go hard core, once we get libraries and internet cafes open again you might be able to set things up so that you don’t have internet at home -- if you want to go that route. You can also shut down electronic devices, put them in inconvenient locations, etc for certain periods of time, or if you need your phone on hand find ways to delete or otherwise limit access to certain apps.

Sometimes gentle guildlines, rules of thumb, and cutting yourself a lot of slack work better and sometimes they don’t; if you’re not sure, you can try one approach for a while, see how it’s going for you, then try a different approach. Figuring out how to quantify results, both objective stuff like productiviity and hours of screen time and subjective stuff like your mood, will give you something to work with. (This is a project: it’ll take time and there will be false starts and experiments that don’t work. That’s OK and part of the process.)

Self-forgiveness: shame/guilt can backfire really badly. If you’re using tumblr in part as numbing/distraction (and especially if you tend to get attached to content that gets you really angry or in red-alert mode...that may be a sign you’re trying to distract yourself from something) then beating yourself up for that will only make you more inclined to do numbing/distracting behavior. And the internet probably isn’t the only way you know to numb/distract. But working on giving yourself positive offline experiences might help. Practicing gratitude, scheduling off-line activities you enjoy and/or find meaning in, getting outside or at least hanging out near a window or in an indoor space you don’t usually spend time in, etc.

Accountability: additionally, guilt/shame tends to not just go away by wanting it to go away, you need to give yourself something to do instead. If you can identify one or a few things you can do with relatively little activation energy/executive function when you notice you’ve been stuck online for a while and are feeling bad about it, that you believe will help you stay off for a while and not get sucked in so easily next time, that can give you an alternative to mentally yelling at yourself. In particular, I’ve found when I procrastinate on things I have to get done via internet, I can’t always easily shift into getting things done mode, but getting outside does clear my head and makes me more functional when I get back. (Maybe eating something or lying down for a bit will work better for you, or you need something more physically intense like push-ups.)

In general, for me focusing on what I want to be doing works way better than focusing on what I want to be doing less of.

Five-second rule: you count down from five to one in your head, and then move. For instance, closing your laptop/putting down your phone and standing up. I don’t know why this works, but it does. (As in, it works pretty consistently for me when I remember to do it, under circumstances where telling myself “just get up” etc just results in me continuing what I’m doing for who knows how long.) There’s an entire book on it if you want more info. (Might be more helpful for people who are neuroatypical in some way? I’m not sure.) Easier to put into practice if you have some way of reminding yourself when you need it most, or if you set aside time to practice so that it becomes automatic.

Outside support: getting another person to check in with you every so often, having a study partner or group if you’re in school, having a work-from-home buddy, asking your boss for more direct supervision, any formal or informal set-up where someone else will notice if you don’t do what you said you were going to do. Or anything where you have someone else physically or virtually present to help keep you on track.

Knowing your next step: especially sometimes people procrastinate on big, scary things when they don’t know how to get started, this is fixable by breaking down the task into individual steps

Feelings suck: anything that helps you face your feelings is going to make you less dependent on using social media for numbing or distraction. CBT techniques etc. Also: physical exercise is supposed to be ridiculously helpful for emotional self-regulation. (And therapy.)

Loneliness: this one is trickier, especially while the pandemic is still going on...but when possible putting extra effort in to finding and maintaining offline relationships (casual acquaintanceships, friendships, romance, family connections, found family, qpr’s, etc) is going to in the long run make you less dependent on social media for human interaction, even if it doesn’t feel better in the short run. (Which is not to say that people with strong social networks don’t use social media...but definitely for myself, I spent way less time on social media before my cfs wrecked my social life, and I especially started spending way more time on social media after moving away from my friend groups. So presumably it goes in reverse as well, and stronger social ties make it easier to maintain a moderate and restrained social media presence, as opposed to a kudzu social media presence.) (Even if you think you want very close one-on-one friendships or relationships, having a lot of consistent positive interactions with acquaintances actually feels really good -- meetup groups and hobby/activity groups and religious orgs and art/theater/music stuff and regular volunteering and I guess sports? can be great for that.)

Willpower/self-discipline is a myth, habits are real. Don’t get worked up about whether you “should” be able to just choose to be on social media less often, figure out what life hacks let you be on social media less often, without making it a battle of will each time.

Finally... a lot of what makes people more vulnerable to having certain activities go kudzu, is not under your personal control. It’s how society’s structured or it’s your genes or who knows, right? If you’re having to do a course-correct on your life because you don’t like how it’s going, that’s normal. Needing to do a course-correct doesn’t make you bad, but being able to do it makes you strong or resourceful or something like that. It’s worth being proud of.