#maybe i just haven't found affordable wool yet

[fyresnow]

finally took some nice pics of this tank top I knit! (ft a pair of shorts I made too) I made the pattern myself and I’m super proud of it 😊 (previous post here)

Yarn: Lion Brand linen cotton bamboo in cherry blossom (I LOVE the way this yarn feels against my skin, it’ll be so nice for summer. I actually bought a bunch more in other colors bc it was on clearance the other day, I hope it’s not gone forever.) (about 550 yds)

Pattern: I made this in the most obnoxious way possible because I wanted to use up as much yarn as I could and didn't know how long to make it. So I needed to knit the body top down. But I needed to knit the shoulders bottom up in order to get the shaping right on the neckline.

So I did a provisional cast on for the front and worked that flat up and over to the back. The plan was to keep working flat until the armhole and then connect with the front and work down. But I couldn't get the increases on the back to match the decreases on the front. So I had to do another provisional cast on and knit a second section (the back) flat from the armhole to where the first section ended and graft the two together. AND THEN pick up the provisional cast ons and join to work in the round until it was long enough. 10/10 would not recommend.

also I didn't have circulars in the right size so I made this on six to seven dpns (size 4)

The increases for my hips are KRL and KLL (lifted increases) so they're pretty invisible. The dropped stitch was a single stitch and there's a twisted stitch to each side of it. I didn't bother blocking this one although I guess I could have. I like the way the lace looks as is. I suppose it's not the most flattering length on me and the diagonal ribbing at the bottom flared out so much bc I forgot to decrease before it and then didn't want to redo it...

I haven't decided if I want to post the actual pattern notes / sell it because it was drafted for someone with a flat chest (bc I have a flat chest and it's for me lol) and it would involve redoing a lot of the math for different chest sizes.

[johnnys-breastmilk]

𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐱 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐣𝐨𝐡𝐧𝐧𝐲 𝐜𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧

a/n -- just a gender neutral, simple, and short smut for halloween! (so short, just haven't been in the zone lately) - happy halloween!

words -- 1.1k (verryyyy short)

warnings -- handjob (Johnny receiving), bad dialogue/ooc (maybe, wrote it as all Johnny Cage's applicable)

~~~

“Johnny.” You censured, eyes laying on him as he walked into the common area of his mansion. The size made it hard to tell where the line of each room ended and began.

He could tell where your disapproval laid, “You said I either have a thick skull or a tiny brain.”

You didn’t say those exact words last night. It was no secret that Johnny was a big spender, even when he lacked the money to afford a shining quality like that. The night before his big halloween party, and his chain of other parties left this one unplanned, so he splurged on decorations and booze that, thankfully, wasn’t as old as Mileena. You had told him that he either had a thick skull or thought with his dick. And now, he stood before you in a cheap halloween costume.

“So your answer to that is… this?” Your hand flagged him from the neck down, where his body was covered in a full-bodysuit made of shrunken wool that hugged his every inch. Thin vinyl was plastered over it to replicate a cartoonish version of the skeletal system, like he was getting an XXX-ray. His upper body was fine, and surprisingly clothed unlike his previous record of annual exposure. Just south of his torso is where the trend continued this year, an extra piece of fabric made for his dick to fill out was apparent as the rest of his costume funneled down his legs and to his feet. Almost like a onesie, but nothing less than explicit. Was he seriously going to walk around like that at his own party? At least he wouldn’t have to ask for someone to hold his beer as he would have an unsteady walking-shelf to set it on that sprouted off his waist. Black may be slimming, but it could never hide his beast.

“I got a matching doctor costume and it was buy one, get one. No extra expense.” He waved it off, suggesting that it was no big deal. After last night, he had no clue if you were ready to leave Cage alone in his mansion or stick with him through another seasonal spending spree. 

“Guess that’s it then. Johnny Cage is getting an exam.” You patted the printed sternum of his bodice, right about where his upper-chest would be. The notion ushered out a form of tension squeezing around Johnny’s lungs. Something the X-ray couldn’t find and something your watchful eye couldn’t discern.

He tittered on the first few syllables, “Gnarly movie title.” One thing about Johnny was that he didn’t act like he had something to hide.

“Just don’t let it be a horror flick.” You still couldn’t shake the fact that he wanted to watch Invasion of the Body Snatchers right after extra-terrestrial visitors had come to his home.

“I was thinking horror-comedy with a surprise cameo—me!” Johnny hurried out of the room and noisily cleared off the decorations on his marble-white kitchen counter by shoving them to the floor. He saw you follow in his steps at a slower pace, eye’s going from him to the scattered decorations all over the floor. “I know, I know. I’ll clean it up after.”

“I never said I was mad,” you started to jump the gun and make an assumption. Maybe Johnny should have handed you a prop gun and uniform from one of his old buddy-cop movies given how trigger-happy you were, “It just means I get to see that ass after we deal with this.”

Your hands found purchase with something else to squeeze, though. His thighs, lanky yet toned, made the fabric wrapped around them look uncomfortably tight. It was the most apparent on his boner, acting like a cock sleeve, or better yet, a black and white sock that was the typical cum-dump for someone of Johnny’s mental age. 

“So, you said you were having some discomfort?” You let your hands ghost over him, pretending to feel around and find the source of his issue.

“Yeah, Doc. All my skin is gone and so are my organs and my… everything.” His hands took ahold of yours and guided you directly to his crotch, as if they had strayed to far and he needed to put them on the right path.

The hint was clear, so you quickly grasped his half-hard dick. Each pulse in your hand made it firm up even more. “Well, there’s something here… like, it’s blood… rushing.”

“What’s the diagnosis?” He feigned a wince and looked away, ready to hear the impetuous calumny.

“That you’re super dead… and maybe decapitated.” 

“Give me some relief in the afterlife?” He said weakly, reaching up to grab your arm. 

You giggled, trying to keep it under wraps and not break character. “Johnny, what’s the plot of this?”

“Just give me my peace…” He controlled his voice so that it slowly faded away and his eyes shut with camera-perfect timing, one peeping open to see your reaction a moment later as if it was your cue to speak up.

You laughed it off, choosing to not convolute the plot anymore and giving the skeleton his last wish. That was the best this a fake doctor-spouse could do for their partner, after all. Your hand hadn’t left the hold on his cock, feeling it practically burn against your skin, even through the cheap wool and vinyl. Johnny must not have been wearing anything under this bodysuit, since his face contorted as you jerked his shaft up until the tip. The unseen mushroom head was sensitive on the flat side, so you let the cloth and pressure against it do most of the work to rile him up.

It seemed to work and Johnny was undone within minutes. His back arched away from the cold marble he laid on, then his hips followed in a similar direction. Going up, he forced himself into the palm of your hand until the base hit the entrance of the tunnel your fingers formed around him. Something that physically and emotionally separated the two of you brought you closer, and Johnny got off on that idea more than seeing his own reflection. 

Johnny’s hips kept bucking once the dam had burst. Glossy white percolated through the fabric and dribbled down the length of his covered shaft. As his desperation pushed him to the edge, he thrust himself into the air one more time, and the fabric had stretched enough for it to tear at the tip.

“Guess the party’s cancelled? No halloween costume means…”

“Well… I lied, earlier. It was a two for one, so I got four.”