#me: this garbage after 4(?) days like nbd

[chosebravery]

me, late? you can (troy bolton vc) bet on it!!!!11!1

good morning / afternoon / evening, my children. my name is tea (or t, or anything you want; s/h pronouns) and i have been struggling with a flu for over a week now and things,,,have been difficult but i'm going to power through because i already adore this rp (the writers in here are no joke???) and i ought to present yall my daughter. i will babble a lil about her under the cut and if you want me to reach you out, like this post!!

 * △ — the dark lord has targeted [ ELIZABETH ROSIER NEE HEPBURN ] !  the muggles say she holds resemblance to [ ALICIA VIKANDER ]. the [ TWENTY EIGHT ] year old [ female ] was [ WARM & HELPFUL ] before the war, but have now become [ STUBBORN & SELF RIGHTEOUS ]. though they were once a part of [ GRYFFINDOR ], they have now taken up the position of a [ HEALER ]. whispers throughout the ministry claim that the [ MUGGLEBORN ] is actually [ AN ORDER MEMBER ], but i wouldn’t report that to the daily prophet.

the only child out of a quite unlucky couple, elizabeth was born in a household where people made gold out of grass. her parents were poor and unfortunate, but they loved each other--her father still claims so, even after her mother's passing when the girl was just three. mr. hepburn's optimism was what supported them--that and his gig at a pawn/repair shop at linlithgow; while he went on that and any part times he could find to keep up rent and put his daughter through school, said girl would be at home, holding onto what needed to hold and distracting herself with tales of other worlds.

as the daughter of an immigrant and an outsider, elizabeth grew to be peculiar, standing out from the rest of the people in the small town she came to live on after her mother’s passing. on the mid fifties, on a scottish town where nothing happened, people didn’t take very kindly to strangers disrupting their routine, but it was where elizabeth was to grow nevertheless; with a few years, name calling was something she learned to become unfazed by. despite however isolated and shunned she was then, she never imagined the magic of her books could become reality--the butterflies in her stomach were both of excitement and nervousness, a mix of feelings she would come to feel many times over the rest of her life. for good or bad, she was different (and this, too, would follow her for the rest of her life).

when her letter came, what she assumed to be a well conceited prank turned out to be her new astonishing reality. as she went through a wall and boarded a train, she was both terrified and amazed.

soft spoken, quiet and isolated, with a preference for long books and a tendence for distraction, elizabeth hepburn was hardly the model person for a gryffindor--she didn't think of herself courageous when the hat was placed on her head either, but there are all kinds of courage in this world, she was told. in the seven years to follow she had never watched injustice go free, nor she backed out when someone (anyone) needed her; beneath honey and unfailing kindness, in moments necessary, her voice was like thunder and her will unbreakable.

of course, sometimes it wavered--many were the times she almost gave up the wonderful magical castle when she thought of her father, all alone. he has refused this many times: she was meant for something more than a small town with ordinary people who did not appreciate her, mr. hepburn would tell her.

those years away at hogwarts installed a tradition of very long letters, written at least twice by week--flowery, extensive and very descriptive, they are still kept to this day by the old hepburn, and its sight is enough to make the daughter blush and smile sheepish. she is a sight when excited, all who know her know her passion.

her career in “wizard medicine” was a suggestion by a professor, who was aware of her excelling in herbology and potions, and her people skills (ironically, since she, then, was not the most social kid & her willingness to socialize and reach out was belated). despite over ten years working on st mungo, she still aspires for something more; her husband & her shares a dream to open a book shop of their own, but due to more pressing events, it keeps being pushed forward.

she married domitius on the spring of 72, about 26 months after they bonded while she nursed him back to health. her interest in men -- or relationships in general -- had been nonexistent until then, so it was a surprise not only for his prejudiced pureblooded family but also for those who knew elizabeth. regardless, she claims he is first her best friend, her soulmate, then her husband--he is also father of her children: five year old twins daniel and isolde & little cosette, not much older than a year old. if you catch fictional characters names in there, you’re spot on (she is a nerd even as a mom, yes--fitting too, as her own name had come from the iconic austen heroine).

currently she works at the janus thickey ward as its healer in charge, although her presence is often required on the dai llewellyn ward due to her experience with some incidents’ injuries; it’s not uncommon to see her reading the newspapers, books and letters to the patients.

however, it has been over a year since she last stepped on st mungo. her youngest child was born on early 1978, so elizabeth has been on maternity leave since then; as much as she loves her children (and she does, overwhelmingly so), the life of a stay at home mother does not agree with her anxiety so she is very eager to return to her routine, even if it means she has to stay away from her children for more than she wished she would--she takes as advantage her father is so good with them, and always willing to crash in their spare bedroom.

she is virtually incapable of staying still--if not with her nose in a book, it’s likely she is walking around, doing whatever needs to be done around wherever she is (and this does not only apply to her own house, much to her friend’s dismay). her nervous tics include tapping her fingers, tucking her hair behind her ears and biting her lips; fiddling with her clothes and her wand also apply so it’s not uncommon she is keen to hold people’s hands to prevent the anxiety to be too transparent.

elizabeth’s ethical code is incorruptible, which is one of the main causes for any friction she may create with others--another would be her inability to stay still in face of wrongdoing; blindly, she will not admit she is a bit of a nosy judgmental holier-than-thou. thankfully (debatable for some), all that makes her just right to fight for the order.

elizabeth has an intimate knowledge of muggle mechanics, due to her father’s main line of work during her childhood years; even now, when she has lived most of her life in the wizard world, she is still curious and eager to learn and be connected with the muggle world and often finds herself doing things the muggle way.

EXTRAS (ish):

she is a saggitarius!! which is not what people first think of her, but elizabeth is just like um don’t judge a book by its cover ok. but i don’t blame people who take her as a virgo because ya know, girl is kinda....very virgo lmao (it is her ascendant anyways shhh). she was also born on 1950, which makes her a grandma tiger; she graduated hogwarts on 1968 (i don’t think there’s anyone who could have been classmates w her but,,,i’d die for this so pls bring me more old people!!!)

her wand is made of laurel wood & phoenix feather; it is quite bendy and is 10 3/4 in size. overall, i found it all very fitting!! laurel wands are said unable to perform a dishonorable act, and it does not accept lazy owners, who are often on a quest for glory -- it combines rather well with the flexibility, fitting for a woman who can not stand still / doing nothing / saying nothing for more than ten minutes.

her patronus is a weasel! people with this patronus tend to be ruled by instincts and very intuitive, and to be polite, honest and hardworking. (source)

her amortentia’s scents are old manuscripts (she is passionate about books, but she adores old editions because of how personal they are), fresh ink (she is often writing something, and always carries both quills and muggle pens with herself), the first batch of bread of the day (she just,,,loves bread. it is a very nostalgic scent for her, remeting from her childhood), geer oil (her father is a mechanic, and often she helped him), chamomile (known for its calming effects, the rosier plants chamomile in their garden & it is elizabeth’s husband to go choice of tea).

talking about scents, homegirl often smells of herbs. her husband keeps telling her she smells so good and like, yeah, he is cheesy as hell, but i’m pretty sure she does smell like heaven.

also about scents: she hates coffee and is the founder of coffee sucks society ™ . expect dissertations about this on my writing.

pretty much all else i can say / know about her are on the many profiles i’ve sent on my app. you can find them here if you don’t mind the length ( 1, 2, 3, 4) & her aesthetics here + a weheartit collection (aint nobody got time for that other site) here.

[incarnateirony]

So while it’s still gonna be 2-3 days until I get my test results back, I figured I’d give people some insight on stuff about covid testing beyond vaguely yelling that it’s uncomfortable.

1. That CDC list of like 4 sad cold-like symptoms is garbage, that isn’t all they ask you about. Literally if you’re letting your family hold you back because you don’t explicitly have a “dry cough”, or your fever is /only/ running 99.6 so that’s NBD? Yeah, ignore that. Also remember, /people can be asymptomatic carriers./

2. This idea of 6 feet of social distancing really only applies in like, enclosed areas with no air draft. For example, when doing drive through testing, they make you turn off your air conditioning, because the aerosol affect can and will cycle it actively through a vehicle. If you’re exactly 6 feet away from someone that’s a carrier and a big wind draft comes by, it can still blow shit your way. 

Notes on the actual testing process: 

UAB is running drivethru testing in several areas. UAB was also on top of this shit before it ever surfaced in the US while the politicians were denying it, and UAB developed one of the drugs being tested in China with some success. In fact, the UAB infectious disease chief of staff used to like, live across the street from where I am right now. But that’s a whole other aside.

That said, UAB isn’t playing around. Your local institutions may have something similar. Don’t be shy about calling, though find what your *local hotline* is, try googling like “Covid testing near [city]”, because the stupid Health Department loop will send you on a circular circus forever.

In the case of how mine worked, there was a pre-screener via phonecall that asks for symptoms or reasons for concern. In my case, it was a list of things including headache, body ache, dizziness, feeling like I’m living in an eternal hangover, fatigue and yes, finding out we had contact with someone who turned up covid positive.

The last one kinda got my wife throwing a bit of a tizzy because she started arguing in the background they never touched while I had to cut her off, because really guys, I promise, you don’t need direct contact, and I think my wife figured that out at the drive thru process. But that alone IS enough of a keyword to go to the next screener stage.

They set an appointment and don’t want you to show up more than 15 early. In our case, UAB has an emergency radio station that bilingually broadcasts basic starter directions including having your ID ready, not rolling down your window, turning off your AC and, when you DO have to roll down your window, *DO NOT TALK TO THEM*. They know you’re thankful or whatever so keep your diseased mouth shut, because things the CDC AREN’T telling you right now is even asymptomatic people can have such dense manifestation of the virus in their throat that you’re basically just actively breathing clouds of this shit. So keep your face shut, keep your AC off.

I really, REALLY wanted to communicate this part to the crowd because I don’t feel like people are grokking how easy it is to circulate-jet this stuff over public spaces. One motherfucker sneezes near a vent, see what fucking happens.

Anyway, after that they slap a test baggy compared to your ID on your car, flag you forward, then have you call a doc or nurse practicioner that reviews your symptoms and reason for testing again because of test kit shortage. The doc will be outside of your car with an ipad or something like it tallying down your symptoms, reasons and keywords. Don’t lie, but be willing to be a little less than specific, because they KNOW these things are vague but also have to disqualify you. If you’ve had contact with someone that turned up covid positive, *say that*, don’t split hairs over how direct it was; it doesn’t mean That Specific Friend is at fault either, you could have touched the wrong gas station door, but that’s a huge qualifier to get tested, even if they ask who and where, you’ll have a name but GENERALLY SPEAKING THEY ARE TOO OVERLOADED TO CARE. If you have a cough, don’t split hairs over if it’s a wet or dry cough.

And DON’T pass up listing other symptoms you don’t see listed on stupid CDC/WHO/whatever sites. I had introduced it with my 3 day headache, and later on she cycled back to ask again if I had any headache, which I reminded her and yup, guess what, fuck the CDC, that’s apparently a flag checker. Body aches, low grade fever, various coughs, fatigue, headaches-- apparently nausea and diarrhea, though I had dismissed my previous nausea and didn’t have the latter. You don’t need any/all of these tbh, but I just can’t emphasize enough how utterly incomplete the listing is and it led to my own family well-intendedly gaslighting me out of my symptoms which, like, 3 pre-screen rounds later got me put through.

They don’t even just have N-95 masks, they have those plastic visor ones on top. They ain’t playing. Even the cars get distanced where possible. One person per car is tested here and they say if you turn up positive, presume everyone in your household is positive. So like, those numbers you see on the counters? Aren’t really scratching the surface because like, for every test there, that whole family is now considered infected.

The shit’s like the flu swab on steroids. You WILL get a nose bleed. I wouldn’t call it painful but it’s super uncomfortable so like if you’re in it you better damn well commit. Your face will probably feel funny for the rest of the day from nerves being pushed weird, or I know mine did.

Anyway that said, I’m still waiting on test results but I figured I’d put some stuff out that might help people/clarify shit. It IS possible to get testing but you have to search out resources to do it and navigate carefully.

Also check out what methods are being used to regulate ventilator availability in your area and don’t screw yourself. I fully admit I sidelined through my questions when asked if I had previous conditions by mentioning undiagnosed/in pursuit issues causing arrhythmia etc, without deadass being like “Yeah hi we’re pretty sure I have a major heart condition” because in my area, those are the first people denied ventilators, so I’d rather be marked down as generally at risk without being NOBREATHYTUBEFORYOU axed off in the system. So check how your local authorities or med systems are regulating shit and be careful how you phrase things.

I’ve never been so damn thirsty in my life so if this a general flu and not covid it’s still a big yikes. Electrolyte solutions can and will be a lifesaver regardless. Someone I know, their brother got it, and he started losing a pound a day in waterweight despite drinking water by the gallon, so HYDRATE GUYS, HYDRATE.

[psychostrilondes]

HI IM GONNA WRITE MORE davekat because im disgustin

i made this little babie post that said like, dave hides in cramped little spaces like closets and laundry rooms sometimes and needs to be coaxed out, and ye!! its mostly when hes close to his version of panic over a delusion, oh no, oh no im not safe, where is, i cant find it, i need, i cant, everyones looking to kill me, im horrible, ive failed and im still failing, things like that? all hidden behind his flat mouth expression and No Words, and when it gets really bad the expression doesnt change at all but maybe he starts crying with how pent-up afraid he is and has to dip three fingers behind his shades to wipe the tears onto the sleeve of his god pjs , and, something has to Happen, and if theres no way to fight whats happening, and no one is around right now like its the middle of the night, the only option is to hide??

so imagine at like 4 am on the meteor or even in his lil house on earth c or just wherever, dave stalking down the hallways with his 1/2swordkind in his hands, clutched so freakin tight, and hes Cool and doesnt have much adrenaline even though hes scared bc he knows he needs to stay calm to fight if something jumps out at him, and there are so many perceived threats even though hes maybe actually totally safe, and hes on guard while he walks to ,,,, somewhere? anywhere thats more unfamiliar and cramped than his room, because whatevers stalking him would obviously know to check his bedroom for the man himself, so maybe he goes to the little walk-in food pantry they’ve got and shuffles aside some big bags of whatever of makeshift storage to hide behind them, or like, hides way back behind the laundry machines and, wherever, he curls up really tight with his knees to his chest and his specibus tucked away and ready to be drawn in a split second should he need it, and he’s so used to hunkering down in weird spots from his childhood, ugh, its just too natural and too bringing-back-memories, ugh, dangit

so he just kind of sits back there, totally hidden, and lets his adrenaline build up and he starts trembling and just kinds of , waits, for the feeling to pass, might , take a while , ah

and karkat and him have had this routine that he’s foregone today in favor of heavy dissociation, karkat hangs out in the main room with a book he’s reading and waits for dave to wake up even though dave wakes up like two or three hours after he does, its cool, he can use the reading time? its no big deal? its a big book anyways, but then, it’s four hours that hes been hanging out in the common room, and then five, and um, hes getting bored of reading, like u cant just read forever hehe

after five and a half hours he decides to go over to daves block and just wake him the heck up, itd be kinda cute to see him all sleepy and he totally has this image of messy-haired shadeless dave in his head, and hes kind of in a good mood, and he knocks, and theres obviously no answer so he punches in dave’s doors password like its nothing, nbd, and daves literally just

not in there

wtf ,,,, there goes his good mood hehe dave just Doesnt skip their whole eating breakfast together in the morning thing, either theyre about to argue or somethings kinda wrong?? is dave hurt or something?? did he get kidnapped by somebody on his way to the bathroom?? he laughs a little, and over the next hour he asks around for dave and gets a thorough “nuh uh” answer from just about everybody, and then, um, where the heck is dave. where’d he go.

after asking literally everybody he asks rose and kanaya last and kanaya sort of looks really worried?? oh no,, rose explains to him with equal worrie that maybe dave isnt feeling well, and we’ll keep an eye out, but she’s being freaking cryptic in the way karkat hates about her and he just leaves without unendingly pressing her about it bc he knows its useless by now lol

so for the next hour and a half hes just. looking where dave usually likes to go

dave isnt at any of his favorite spots, and if its earth c he even asks daves favorite cafe’s baristas if theyve seen him yet, and they say no, and its literally the afternoon?? um?? ugh

he’s gone freaking everywhere and karkat just ends up back at home or back where he started and he just ,,,,,, doesnt know what to do

its been hours and hours, its almost been like, all day, and karkat misses him, damniiiiiit, hes so sad :( in his Misery he wanders down the hall to make something to eat since he literally hasnt eaten , he ................... sees daves red outfit in the dark from where hes hiding under the shelving.........

wow , he just has this little second, like “um,” and he has this second to look and see his knees to his chest and his hands still clutching his hair, sort of frozen like that, and karkat crouches and says “dave..?” and dave startles and his hands re-clutch into white hair and oh no, oh god its happening, its happening im gonna die, oh no, this is just and im gonna be gone oh no fuck fuck and he cant stop some more tears from just Pouring omfg and he kicks out his cover, a big tub of whatever miscellaneous, and his 1/2swordkind is back in his hands and shielding his body from karkat, and karkat says “hey, whoa” and holds up his empty hands, “its just me dave, karkat, its karkat” and dave doesnt move, and his mouth is in a grimace, he totally just, caught that hes holding up his sword at his boyfriend?? karkat?? karkat’s here, this is karkat he’s looking at, and karkat just watches him, and settles a little when dave does, and his sword lowers a little as he falters, um, and he realizes he made a mistake, wtf omg

hahaha umm, but hes still so sure karkat is here to kill him maybe?? that might actually happen ,,, so dave does lower his sword and set it aside VERY slowly and cautiously without turning his eyes away from karkat, but he doesnt move from where he is , um,

and karkat settles out of his crouch and sits down on the floor there, and like, “have u been hiding here the whole time?” and dave stares at him like hes surprised karkats here?!?!?!?!? when did karkat get here wtf

an hes dissociating out of his darn mind, like it feels like hes been hiding behind this big box for years,,,,, and most of him feels like hes vulnerable with the box pushed out and away and he has to cover himself back up in case Someone Else comes in, and part of him is so happy his boyfriends here, karkat can make it safe, when he was upset earlier karkat was asleep and he couldn’t verbalize his emotions to wake him up or anything, omg, and dave just stares at him a whole bunch without even blinking, just taking in that his boyfriends here >w< dangit that would personally make me so happy too arg 

karkat asks if he ate anything today, and asks when dave started hiding in here, and dave cant even process what hes saying to him but its okay!! karkat says, if you come out we can grab some food, i bet youre hungry right? and dave totally realizes that the cramps in his middle are actually from not having eaten and not from internal stomach insects and it must be really late in the day? and dave nods a little, and thats really good, really good that hes responding, honestly its been more than 12 hours and his back hurts really bad and his butts Beyond Numb and he could really use a blanket and a bowl of cereal .......

so karkat inches into dave’s hiding spot with him, sort of over the course of their conversation, and then by the time dave’s nodding or shaking his head to his questions karkat is back there in the dark with him, and he comments on how cramped it is back here what the heck?? how are u not atrophied?? and literally within One Minute dave is hugging him, he even initiates it because dave is a total cuddle monster, and they just sort of hug for a little while , and 

theyre so cute :(

karkat instructs dave to shuffle out of there with him, and he helps dave up and supports his weight for a minute because his joints Freaking Hurt, and he holds him up until dave stops trembling and then they hold hands together really tightly and go and make something easy to eat like cereal or hot pockets or what ever

and then they eat the hot pockets

and its good

and dave still isnt talking but thats cool, hes still a little fragile, but its ok, dave is nodding and tapping his fingertips silently on his thigh and maybe he’s not feeling it yet but hes warming up, karkat can make up for the other half of silence , its really nice to get food in him, and within the next hour he says “what the hell, karkat” and then “you’d think they’d know how to make those” and its clear dave is gettin back in the swing of things :p 

and that is the story of dave spending 16 hours hiding in a food pantry ... thnk u im garbage

[fmlfpl]

Lineup Lamentations - GW29 - Alon Wildcard Edition

Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week.

LATE AS FUCK ALON ON WILDCARD EDITION... hopefully still interesting to read even if it’s this late. What do you think of Alon’s team???

WALSH

TRANSFERS:

OUT: Patrício and Jiménez

IN: Heaton and Callum Wilson

Operation fuck Wolves off to hell begins a week earlier than I had anticipated. Of course Rui is dropped because why wouldn't he be dropped the gobshite. I don't have enough in the bank to get any GK except for Boruc which feels like a potential disaster waiting to happen. Bego was bad but they've been bad lately so who knows if he keeps his place over the next handful of fixtures. Not a place I want to be... I don't really care about losing Jim this weekend since they are shit and I hate him. Getting rid of guys I hate to guys I don't hate will at least make me feel happy...I think. Gambling on Howe the liar here a bit, but I'll be benching Callum this weekend anyway and will just hope that he's on the bench which would position him well to start next GW at Huddy. This effectively kills any plan to get Higz in but so be it. I think this is my best play.

GK:

Heaton (CRY)

NOT RUI!!!!! YES! Tom unfortunately goes against my team but it's still a relatively decent on paper home fixture and they have had great underlying defensive stats since he came back into the team. And I love him. Go on Tom you beauty.

DEF:

Robertson (eve)

Robbo the hero is an easy start. Not much to say about the boy.

Lascelles (whu)

Jamaal has a bit of a tricky one away to Wet Spam but not really going to overthink it and roll him out while they are on song.

Wan-Bissaka (bur)

Finally, 1b is back baby and straight into my XI. Not a great fixture but fucking fuck me if you think I'm starting Bennett instead of him. Not going to happen ever again.

MID:

Salah & Mané (eve)

All my money still in mid on display this weekend. Mo and Mane remain and it's silly to expect anything other than Livp completely doing Everton on Sunday. Maybe they will score 5 and Mo won't blank. Would be novel.

Son (ARS)

Private corporal Suon is a lad I will remain patient with. Don't know what to expect in the NLD but he's still a quality player and can bang in any game. Not expecting a ton but he still feels fine.

Pogba (SOU)

Paul has a home banker and should be good for some points.

Sterling (bou)

Finally, Raz goes to his favorite place on earth, Bournemouth in what should be a bloodbath. Raz has low key started 1 game in the last 4 gameweeks so...he owes us.

FWD:

Rondón (whu) & Barnes (CRY)

Running out big Sal and Smashley this weekend. Was originally planning to bench Barnes for Jim but the transfers forced my hand. Not expecting loads from these two this weekend but the fixtures aren't diabolical so who knows. Seems fine.

BENCH:

Bennett (CAR)

Wilson (mci)

Chambo (lol)

CAP:

Sterling (bou)

Raz obv. Rested and ready to fuck. Go get 'em Razzybaby.

ALON

TRANSFERS:

A MILLION TRANSFERS VIA WILDCARD

GK:

Heaton (CRY)

I went with Tom... Was on Alisson for a lot of tinkering, was on Ederson for a bit of tinkering, and eventually it came down to Dubravka and Boruc vs. Tom and Guaita and I went with the latter.. the fixtures in my opinion and underlying stats for Burnley (Burnley 4th in NPxGA since Heaton returned and Newc are for 15th in same period), are both a lot better then Newcastle, and Burnley 100% don’t blank in GW33 like Dubravka might do... Also I love the synergy with Guaita where A. I will bench Tom in GW30 when he goes to Anfield and Guaita is home to Brighton in their derby, and B. if Palace beat Watford in the cup then Palace will have a double in GW35 and that will be nice for me to have a doubling GK without having to make a transfer for it!

For this week Palace have been buozzin around a bit scoring some goals with Bats in and Wilf back to his old ways but I’m hoping at home Burnley can maybe do a job or at least rack up saves.

DEF:

Trent & Matip (eve)

Made sure that I was at least doubling up Liverpool defense and here we are now, entertain us... I don’t think that Trent needs any sort of WC explaining at all so skipping the scouse legend and onto the very under the radar Matip... Very quietly Matip has started 6 straight in the league (more if you include other comps) and is looking good in a partnership with VVD. He’s even looking dangerous on some set plays and some runs forward (like that dribble vs. Man. United)!... As for Gomez Klopp said the earliest he would come back is after the intl. break which would be GW32 when I’m FHing anyway, and Lovren should be back to training after this GW but I do not think that Matip will just straight up get dropped for no reason to go back to Lovren with this long of a spell out for Lovern and in for Joel... If I do need to get rid of Joel in GW33 or GW34 or GW35 then I will either go to the Liverpool CB who took his place or I will go to a defender who doubles in GW35 and both of those things are very easy to do.

Love the Joel pick and can’t wait for him to score vs. Everton to really hammer home how good a pick he is. Double Liv defensively every week is fantastic and in the derby it’s no different.

Luiz (ful)

This spot (let’s be honest, every spot) was also back and forth between different guys... A little Chilwell a little bit of this a little bit of that I don’t know... Settled on Luiz who we shouted on pod as simply just a really good pick for the rest of the season. In GW34 Chelsea are at Anfield and in GW36 they are at Old Trafford and every other match (and they don’t blank) is a good cleanable fixture. Luiz is a very solid pick and I’m happy to be on board there.

This week they get to go fuck Fulham sideways... Maybe new manager bounce will Fulham dudes titting and totting at Craven Cottage but meh, if Chelsea can just pay attention for 90′ they should keep an easy clean and destroy Fulham.

Lejeune (whu)

And Lejeune one of four dudes to actually stay in my team from the pre-wildcard lineup and that’s because he does a great job and has pretty decent fixtures and might not blank in GW33, does not blank in GW31.

Not the best of fixtures this week away to Hammers but they are still pretty damn injured and they are a bit outta form, West Ham... I’m hoping Newc can keep their good defensive form up and put in another cleanie. I’m starting Lejeune over Brooks (who may not start and has City) so hopefully it pays off. Go on Newc.

MID:

Salah (eve)

Easy Mo, I think ya gotta keep him in the end even with the derby usually being scrappy and low scoring I still think Mo is just a great pick with the fixture run and will repay the faith as he always does eventually... And one other thing we didn’t mention on pod that I was talking about all day on Slack and other pods backed me up is that despite a Mo blanking on a 5 goal day for Liverpool - he was fucking brilliant. Had an absolutely terrific match in progressing the ball, buildup, taking on their shitty LB, hockey assists, he hit the post, all that shit... Just not FPL stuff. Hopefully can build on the uptick of form and take his chances this time.

Sterling (bou)

Raz back was one of the key cogs on why or why not I was gonna WC and here we are. Raz the fuck in. Rested last week should be straight back into starting 11 this week and flying as per usual against garbage ass Bourney.

Pogba (SOU)

Kept Paul as well. Mainly because of this fixture this week, phenomenal fixture. And then I’ll start figuring out how and when to deal with him and his blanks... in my plans right now it will be Paul and Kun out for Haz and Higs on GW31 but we’ll see.

FWD:

Aguero (bou)

Kun in I mean. How could I not get Kun....??!??!? Yeah he might get rested this week but it’s still Bourney so 30ish minutes is still very much on for points for him and then next week on a full week rest he has home Watford and is the by far standout captain for that. The form and sex appeal are too much to ignore for me.

Barnes (CRY)

Template guy, non-blanker, extremely good numbers, mostly good fixtures. Not much thinking here.

Palace are tough and get AWB back but they’ll still be starting some fuck face next to Tomkins whether it’s Kelly or Dann to exploit. Not the same tight ship as before.

Rondón (whu)

Another big template bandwagonny guy he’s just good and also mostly has good fixtures. No blank in GW31 and maybe a blank in GW33 but NBD if he does I have plenty of guys. It’s gonna be great.

West Ham’s defense is diabolical so I’m hoping they continue to be themselves and Sal pops off. But Newc away vs. Newc home is a very different kettle of fish so we’ll have to see what’s up.

BENCH:

Brooks (MCI)

I like Brooksy a lot and 5.0 is an absolute joke of a price... Even though he rides the pine this week, Bournemouth have the best fixtures from GW30 through the end of the season of any team in the league. Absurd run and Brooks will hopefully keep titting in there.

McNeil (CRY)

Despite getting subbed early last week - for a cheap 5th mid spot who doesn’t blank in 31 or 33 McNeil is still by far the best from where I’m sitting... He’s been bright and should keep getting chances to make stuff happen. Good kid.

Schindler (BHA)

Piece of shit gets to stay in my team... That’s just the way the cookie crumbles........ Schindy is the cheapest nailed guy who doesn’t blank in GW31 or GW33. That’s it. Just cheap, just nailed, and otherwise a bad pick. There is literally nothing else that you need to know about Schindy and Huddy.

And backup keeper Guaita (bur)

Like I wrote in the Tom section he fits really well with Heaton so I’m very happy to combine the two there. And he’s still dirt cheap... Even though Palace defense should be slightly worse with no Mama it’s still pretty good and definitely capable of getting some cleans with the way Woy sets’em up so, yeah, ok, get in there. Back on the Guaita train...

CAP:

Sterling (bou)

Easy Raz easy life. This should be a thrashing and Raz should be nailed for this week. Didn’t really consider anybody ahead of Raz.

[wern]

can’t do a read more cause im on my phone but uhhh

tw discussion of family, sexual abuse, racism/fetishization, ummm i think that’s mostly it . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

i dont have the energy to go into a long rant ((EDIT: well..... this clearly turned out longer than expected)) cause i had three different heart-to-hearts tonight but. turns out my step dad (the one who sexually abused me? yes the very same one) has watched every single lecture that jordan peterson, the far right anti-sjw psychology professor at university of toronto, has posted online. he wanted to talk to me about them, and asked what it was like to be in one of his lectures. i want to fucking die

the other heart to heart was with my step-sisters (my biological dad’s step-kids) about all the narcissistic and offensive shit my biological dad does. i told them that he doesnt talk about himself nonstop because he actually loves himself, but because he hates himself. in fact he doesnt love anybody. which is unfortunate for both me and their mother. it’s also why he verbally and emotionally abused me, and cheated on all his other girlfriends. me and my stepsisters also talked about how their mom is way more meek when he’s around and i was like yeah well i bet he encourages it because it fits his asian house wife fantasy… like you should see the fucked up porn in his browsing history… this convo lasted about 4 hours and we were all just sitting on the kitchen floor

and finally i had a 2 hour conversation in the car with my mom where we cried bc she said she regretted getting together with my stepdad cause she didnt realize he would be bad for me. she did it originally bc she wanted me to have a bigger family than just her after she divorced my dad, in case she died and i would be alone. ive decided to try to reconcile with my stepdad in the spirit of this. i just have to like. figure out how to ignore that he thinks sjws are a plague on humanity. and that he talks about nothing else. and that his daughter is starting to say homophobic shit. i love my little sister but like. anyway

tomorrow i plan to have lunch with my dad and subtly bring up the issues raised by my stepsisters. they’re worried about their mom and they want him to stop imitating asian accents. i have literally told him over two dozen times to stop, in every way imaginable, but he continues. he thinks im being a sensitive sjw because he doesn’t believe me when i say that they’ve asked me to keep telling him. i dont know how else i can get it across to him???? he actually thinks he’s so progressive though, and i think that’s the problem. also my sisters’ boyfriends hate him but there isn’t much i can do about that now. and he’s always embarrassing himself at the filipino community gatherings because he like… thinks he’s one of them? hes oblivious, and is constantly an intruder.

also my step sisters literally clean up after his every mess like he’s an infant. they pick up his garbage as soon as he gets up and he gets angry at them for cleaning his shit off the table. he called home yesterday and made them print off hundreds of little stickers for his election while he was away at work cause he printed off the wrong ones. like these girls aren’t your servants!! and then he asked to borrow their mom’s car, and when they asked if he would drive them to work on his way to his campaign, he complained to me in the angriest, pissiest of voices that everyone was making demands on him. like………. i want him to just fucking……….

anyway this all sounds like a bad night but ive gotten even closer with my sisters (we decided even if our parents break up we’re gonna stay friends) and sorted some stuff out with my mom, who is the most important person in the world to me. i mean im extra pissed tonight that she got together with my step dad after he sexually abused me but what can you do.

this probably sounds really robotic and weird i just? lots of stuff has happened tonight and i needed to get it out.

likes are always really appreciated if you read the whole thing!! ❤❤ i hope u have a good day and talk to people u love

oh ps. i also found out that the like twelve times i had a conversation with my dad this year while i was away at school, was actually my step sister and stepmom suggesting he contact me. he loves bragging about the fact that i go to university of toronto but he doesn’t want to talk to me. nbd in the grand scheme of things bc i don’t care if he calls me cause the only thing he talks about is himself but yeah. and also he lied to them that my mom cheated on him when actually he cheated on her (why would your new gf’s kids need to know this in the first place??). and he told them the reason i admire and still talk to his ex-gf was that she was so successful and i didnt have a successful female role model to look up to (apparently my mom doesnt count, and i can’t admire my other mother figures for their own fucking merits).

my dad also said my mom “probably cries just to hear the kind of world i get to live in… if she understands at all.” like uh considering she’s the parent i talk to daily? i think she gets it? and i was like “why would she cry?” and he was like “you’re living the life she wishes she could lead”…… like actually no im living the life YOU wish you could lead. she always just wanted a big happy family and you fucking ruined that for her haha. but NICE PROJECTING THERE BUDDY. not to mention the condescension. anyway that last bit happened like a month ago but im still mad lol

[opepin]

march: week 4

20: lots of cramping and gas going on lol. well, i rushed in the morning because i stayed in bed 10 minutes after my alarm rang. then the red line had some delays, but i still got to work before 9:30 am, ahah. it was a pretty chill day in the office. i ate lunch at my desk because i had a call when everyone else was eating :< craii. i ordered daniel’s bday present and also managed to print out the amazon return label. i kind of lost fuel one hour before the day ended because of my stomach and cramps, but it’s okay! it happens, haha. i got home at like 5:30 pm and then snacked a bit before doing my 45 minute cardio workout. then i made rice and headed upstairs to shower. i had to bring all of my shower and skin care stuff to the bathroom x__x; it was a nice shower though because the shower head is 2x as strong as ours for some reason. hopefully, that gets fixed too.

kevin got back and we went ot bj’s to pick up croissants. he really wanted them. we devoured two on the way back and then he went to shower while i prepped the veggies. LOL and then i made a mistake where i threw out the white ends of the chives when i wasn’t supposed to and then i took them out of the garbage (was pretty clean) and washed them like 30x times. i was going to lie to kevin about them but then i broke down and told him what happened and he couldn’t stop laughing at me. if baby brain exists does period brain exist too? LOL. kevin finished cooking and then we ate and watched an episode of ‘how to get away with murder.’ then kevin washed the dishes and we headed up to brush our teeth. kevin gamed for the rest of the night and i laid in bed nursing another tension headache until i fell asleep at like 1 am.

21: i woke up with the tension in my neck and shoulder and our shower was still getting fixed so i worked from home. we woke up to the maintenance guys’ knock on the door and they said they would come back in an hour or so because we were still in bed. so then we slept for 30 minutes more and then went upstairs to brush our teeth. the wifi in the suite still didn’t work so kevin sent me the information while he commuted to work. we ate breakfast and then stopped by the front to sign a card and drop off some money for our maintenance and cleaning staff appreciation thingy. then i headed upstairs and changed and brought my stuff to the suite to work. i recorded some videos and then caught up with phil. i got the ‘ok’ to start implementing some of my changes. i’m so excited! then i ate lunch and looked at headsets. i realized that kien and haowei are getting pro gamer headsets LOL. cole suggested the arctis 5 and i might get it. we’ll see.

i went back down to the apartment and finished editing videos and ended my day with a call. then i washed dishes, put on rice, snacked on a croissant, and did an hour workout focusing on obliques. kevin came home a bit later than expected because he was working on a problem. i went to shower while kevin cooked dinner. he got really dried out and tired while cooking so he went to shower after cooking while i watched ‘reign’ and tried catching a good tapu koko. i’m hoping to catch a tapu every other time i game LOL. i didn’t catch one at the end of the day though. we ate and watched two? episodes of ‘how to get away with murder’ and then kevin washed dishes and then we brushed our teeth together upstairs. i finished watching ‘reign’ in bed and then went to sleep at 1:15 am? kevin stayed up debating stock market things or something ahah.

22: i actually didn’t need to rush in the morning. i got dressed before brushing my teeth because i had to go upstairs to the suite to brush my teeth and then ate breakfast and i was on the train at 8:34 am! i met sultan for the first time in person and met our new front end dev, joe today. it was a really quiet office -- only the marketing team and product team were in the office. it was a productive morning. i ordered the arctis 7 in white for my headset for work and then i worked on tutorials. everyone online was busy so i just worked and listened to music. the day went by pretty quickly. we scrambled at the end of the day because of an issue that we really needed to solve together. it was fun doing that and figuring it out. i left at like 5:15 pm after cleaning up things with phil for the client and then i met kevin at the train station :) he made it just in time to get on the train!

i told him about my day and when we got back, i watched ‘jane the virgin’ while trying to catch a good tapu koko. i was close twice but one wasn’t timid nature and the other didn’t have perfect speed :< my hand was cramping so i quit and i cleaned up the bathroom. kevin made stir fry potato slivers and braised chicken with mushrooms for dinner. mmm. the potatoes were hella spicy but when we put more salt, it tasted better. we watched 3 episodes? of ‘how to get away with murder.’ there’s so much sex this season .__. LOL but we’re getting to the good part now. we stopped so i could exercise. oh, our water pressure for the shower is perfect now! it’s waay stronger. kevin took a nice long shower and after my workout, i cleaned the kitchen. i got irritated at kevin for not vacuuming when i asked him to and when he did it, it was half-heartedly. :/ but he cooked today and he just showered so i just re-vacuumed spots and swiffered the floors before showering. i was still a bit irritated but it was dumb to get mad at him for it. so i waited for him to finish up gaming and then went to sleep when he did :)

23: i almost forgot my lunch today but i went back and got on the later train because the train just left as i got on the platform ;( i shared the weird tasting totaste green tea biscuits in the office and steve’s reaction was the best. everyone else said it was alright. diego surprised me and said it tasted like olive oil and he wasn’t disgusted at all. hmmm. oh, diego came into the office without me bothering him to come in :P yay! i was pretty productive today. i had a few long meetings, but it was alright. i ended my day with a meeting that kind of went over in time so i had to jump off, pack up, and then go to the chocolate shop with cole. i got chocolate covered gummy bears and dark chocolate peanut butter cups. cole bought the gummy bears for me because of all the snacks i’ve given him -- thanks bro! T^T i made it to south station 2 minutes later than kevin -- i broke my winning streak ;( ahaha.

we got home and played pokemon and cuddled and watched tv while the rice cooked. we made super easy omurice and then continued watching tv and gaming. mmm. it felt like a friday. we stopped at around 11 pm, kevin washed the dishes, and i did 30 minutes of cardio and 30 minutes of back workout (15 minutes with dumb bells). idk if it’s gonna work because maybe the weights are too light? we’ll see. then i showered and ko’d in bed. mm i wish it was friday, but i’m also working from home tomorrow so nbd! i also caught a pretty good tapu koko! tapu lele is so hard to catch T^T my next challenge... p.s. i love talking and hanging out with everyone at t7. everyone is great and so funny. i’m so grateful.

24: my upper back was in so much pain when i woke up, ahha. kevin got up later than usual because i was still in bed (wfh). :) i got myself up eventually and then made breakfast and recorded videos. i also weighed myself in the morning and i don’t talk about this a lot but i’m so happy and proud of myself for pushing myself physically and getting to my body/health goals, BUT this morning i was 117/118 lbs and 19.7% body fat. yaaaasssss! my “previous goals” were to lose all the weight i gained (i was at like 130 lbs last year), and then get to 20% body fat. my now goal is to maintain this body fat or if i’m feeling bored, go further without changing my diet so it’s solely dependent on how hard i work out. it feels so good to eat whatever i want and stop when i know it’s too much and then work it off and get stronger. i’ve stopped being so dependent on calorie counting and just knowing what foods and portion sizes are good for me. i think i’m pretty close to having a good understanding of how much i should eat everyday and what it will do to my body. i’m getting there and i’m always learning about myself and about food of course ;D

anyway, then i ate lunch and ate some chocolate. mmm these dark chocolate peanut butter cups are the best. i talked to cole and dropped some food knowledge while he had some down time haha. phil told me to take the day easy after 3 pm because sultan and byron had off time today. so that’s what i did! i recorded 5 videos (record!) and then spent a good amount of time uploading pictures on facebook. i took a day off from exercising because my upper back was killing me. instead, i played pokemon for the rest of the day with kevin. we cuddled on the couch while watching tv and playing pokemon the rest of the night. we didn’t even cook dinner because kevin had happy hour and ate sliders and wings so i just baked some chicken nuggets. we took a break to shower and then play some more in bed and then went to sleep pretty late...like at 3:30 am or something...LOL

25: kevin woke up earlier than me and made breakfast. by “earlier” i mean like he woke up at 11 am and i got up at 1 pm LOL. it was a cloudy day so i didn’t feel like recording my 2min showcase... i skipped the meal because i felt full and we went to the movies to get tickets to see ‘logan.’ the 7:20 pm time was totally booked and same with ‘get out’ so we got tickets for ‘logan’ tomorrow at 7:20 pm. :) then we drove over to ‘oh my tea’ and i got the pudding, grass jelly, and boba milk tea drink (this is my second favorite drink there, especially for like a dessert kind of day) and kevin got the strawberry lemonade. i didn’t like his drink. Dx we devoured our drinks before we even got back home. well, kevin finished as we walked into the apartment... kevin tried making general tso’s chicken...it was a spicy af half failure -- tasted too salty and not sweet enough. the spice was too much as well...

while kevin did this, i nluu proofed our kitchen (haha i really enjoyed doing this). then i washed the fleece blankets. we ate, watched some tv, and then kevin left to go climb. i finished getting all of the pokemon in moon though!!! i just need kevin’s kartana -__-” so then i switched over to finally playing ‘bravely default.’ daniel got this game for me for my birthday like forever ago. it was hard getting into it but now i’m hooked. i watched ‘reign’ while playing this and then when kevin got back, we had a quick dinner and tv session and then i continued gaming. i stopped myself at 10 pm to do the intense 60 minute kickboxing video i found a week ago and then showered and continued gaming in bed until 3:30 am again LOL. omg, that work out killed me and reminded me that rest days should be light workout days and not “i’m not going to move anywhere for the whole day” days... the circulation in my legs and arms made me scratch everywhere and it was not pleasant but the work out felt good.

26: we woke up at 12 pm, kevin played pokemon and i played bravely default in bed until 1 pm, kevin made us breakfast, and i recorded my 2min showcase video. i hope it doesn’t turn out too bad? i don’t feel real motivated this week, but i’ll do my best to keep on schedule. then i did some internet errands, figured out our meals for this week, i started laundry, and then we went grocery shopping. we thought we were done early until kevin wanted to get fermented foods for congee and then we forgot to get vanilla mochi.... then we went in circles looking for chocolate syrup at rochebro’s and then we finally made it to bj’s where the express line was kinda long x__x; we made it back, put away all the food, transferred the wet clothing into the dryer, and then kevin realized we forgot to get garlic so he left to get garlic, i washed the dishes and prepped for dinner. luckily, the recipe was quick and we ate before heading out to see “logan.”

whyyyyyyyy?! i cried haha. it was a damn good movie and the little girl is a beast. <3 me and kevin had a semi-argument about character design for females vs male when it comes to “mutants” and things like that on the way back. i folded clothes when we got back, ate the mochi with some chocolate syrup, curled my hair, and then did the 45 minute cardio video. then i showered and brushed my teeth and got into bed. i stayed up until almost 2 am watching videos and waiting for kevin to finish watching the dota game. then kevin woke up at 2:30 am because he couldn’t sleep due to the fact that our upstairs neighbors were blasting music and talking loud af. kevin actually went upstairs and knocked on their door and no one answered... he also sent an email to deco to complain and then he fell asleep with earphones... i think he was listening to dota commentary LOLOL.