#michael afton. headcanons / everybody knows this place is place is dying as am i‚ i might not get another chance

[ahsterism-aa]

@iimpact​ asked: sunflower :   what brings your muse the most joy in life ? michael >:( // botanical headcanons

... good question! i think, with most traits about michael, this is definitely something that SHIFTS over the years at least: when he was younger ( aka pre ‘83 ) it was definitely his own rebellion that brought him joy actually. as much angsty teen energy as it might have, he loved cutting off the sleeves of his t-shirts and blasting his favorite music, sneaking out of the house and climbing fences, messing around with his friends and overall just acting like a reckless teenage boy. not only was it a form of rebelling from the way his home life made him feel, but it was a means of helping himself feel NORMAL— yes, he was far from a good person here and did a lot of shitty things, but a lot of the time he was also just a kid fucking around and it brought him the kind of happiness he found difficult to get otherwise. 

after ‘83 and the older he grows, this is....a more complicated question— he never lets go of that rebellion from his father, but it morphs into something NECESSARY rather than just coping. his depression gets much worse, he isolates himself, and most importantly doesn’t exactly think he DESERVES joy. so.... honestly it’s probably the little things that he looks to for happiness when he needs it? his favorite, stupid drama shows, chewing bubblegum, the people he meets over the years and DOES like but keeps at arm’s length out of fear, his stash of popcorn, music, old photos.. small stuff reminds him that there ARE things worth living for while fulfilling the actual purpose he gives himself (which doesn’t count as very joyful)

[ahsterism-aa]

tag fix pt. 3 bc tumblr despises me ( last one this is it tumblr just thought it could get rid of my CRINGE apparently i think not- )