#might do a second action filled version but we'll see lol

[diamondbreakingboi]

First Fanfic Posted!

Chapter: 1/1

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Fandom: Transformers: Earthspark

Relationship: Bumblebee/Breakdown

Characters: Bumblebee, Breakdown, The Maltos, The Terrans

Additional Tags: Fluff and Angst, Earthspark Spoilers, Post-Canon Fix It, Character Introspection, Angst with Happy Ending

Summary:

Like so many times before, Breakdown is leaving and Bumblebee doesn’t want him to.

...

Crazy to finally convince myself to do this! Hopefully y’all like it as much as I had fun writing it! 💚

Inspired by this post

…

Breakdown never stayed in one place for long.

Too busy, too stubborn, too lost, too something that made Bumblebee resent that wonderful part of him again and again. He was never enough for Breakdown. He had hoped this time, he’d find something to keep him there. To stay one more day. A new job, a new place, a new home. A family for him to live with, friends to love and care for. An entire forest they could race in, together. For old times sake.

Bumblebee knew he wouldn’t stick around this time either. He never did.

So, why was he hoping this time would be different?

Maybe he’d hoped Breakdown would change his mind, staying for the sake of it, to finally rest after millennia of running. An exciting change. He’d always loved those. Something new, it was one of his favorite things before the war, an escape from the dull life they had before all the darkness started to build around the developing war.

Bumblebee remembered showing him places they could explore together in the early days. A new bar. A new race track. A new cave hidden in Cybertron’s wilds. A new reason to keep him around.

But, it was never enough.

So, here’s Bumblebee, watching yet another inevitable farewell from Breakdown.

He first said goodbye to all the Terrans.

Nightshade gave him one of their favorite books to keep him company on his journeys, one about a detective dragon.

Hashtag had the group do several poses for the handmade family album and gave the original to Breakdown.

Jawbreaker gave him a copy of the movie they made together, action and drama packed about a car racing to save the world, one drag race at a time.

Twitch was reluctant at first in her approval of Breakdown, but he wore her down when he Fluffy Ears a flower crown. She gave one of her favorite pictures of Fluffy Ears, while giving her ‘big sister’ speech on dealing with the outside world.

Thrash convinced Breakdown of a parting spar fight. Extra practice in case he runs into any “evildoers.” He’d been reading too many online posts with Hashtag lately.

He was always good with them. The Malto’s graciously gave him his own space to heal and hide away and they've been very helpful in his time there. Nightshade even built him his own race track after Breakdown complimented Nightshade’s newest invention.

He was quick to immerse himself into their family. Becoming an older brother (or a crazy uncle as Dorothy once said). Giving advice about life that could stop your spark and twist it until the hope rose through within you and into the world once again. Changing your very being into someone that would echo until time stopped. Becoming someone you were proud of again.

Next were the Malto’s.

Alex was reluctant to see him go, still curious about the Decepticon culture and his perspective in the war, seeking more and more information about the pre-war Cybertron stories.

Dorothy kept their goodbyes quickly, giving him a knowing mom look and good luck in his future endeavors.

Robby and Mo wanted another ride around the forest before he left. Breakdown was all too eager to show off his skills and speed but his time had ended, and he needed to move on. Or so he claimed. Bumblebee wanted to insist that no one was making him leave, he was free to stay, as he had always been.

Finally, Breakdown turned his golden gaze upon him.

He’d expected and accepted it countless times before.

Yet, this time was different, wasn’t it?

Stuck underground, abandoned, fully drained of energon, and left to rot in stasis lock until his emergency reserves ran out completely. He wouldn’t have survived. After being rescued, he hoped Breakdown would finally see how dangerous this world is and how much he needed a family…and how Bumblebee needed him.

Bumblebee would never admit it to any of his family, but he misses his friends. Everyone was either lost to time, still in hiding, or offline. He’d almost forgotten what it was like to have someone his age. Either everyone around him was too young or too old for him to relate to. He’d finally found someone to spend time with, someone who understood him.

And now they were leaving again.

Yes, he has a family now and he’ll never give them up. Only, he wished Breakdown could see them as that too.

He was brought out of his thoughts when a vocalizer reset.

“So long old friend,” Breakdown said. “Let’s keep in touch this time.”

“Breakdown, I…”

“See you around, little buddy.”

“You know,” Bumblebee stammered in his haste. Breakdown turned with a strange look in his optics. “We could always use another mech on our team. There’s a lot of work with G.H.O.S.T.”

One more reason.

“I overstayed my welcome months ago. Time for me to burn some asphalt.”

One more reason.

“Well-I, Nightshade added another section to the race track. I bet I’d win this time for sure!”

Breakdown smirked. “I doubt that,” he started to walk away. He tried to ignore how his spark ached in that all too familiar, hollow sharpness as his friend walked away once again. “See you later.”

There wouldn’t be a next time.

Another thing shifted in him. It knocked and bubbled up before he could hold it in like he had so many times before. He fumbled for another reason. Just one more!

Breakdown shining in the setting sun. Soft oranges and pinks across his frame, cascading a long shadow across Bumblebee, hiding him in that cool darkness.

It was never enough. He was never enough.

He’ll be alone. Again!

Stuck in that same emptiness, hidden away from the world, constantly chasing after a long forgotten ghost who doesn’t want to be found.

He promised himself he wouldn’t say anything, yet, he couldn’t stop that one word he had been desperate to say ever since the first goodbye. It burned through his cables, prickled along his back strut, numbed his processor, and poured out his derma before he could stop it.

“Stay!”

Breakdown stared at him at his sudden outburst. “What?”

He regretted it immediately. It was selfish of him to ask, to wish for more.

Bumblebee's door wings wvered. “Nothing! I’ll see you later! Next time we race, I’ll win for sure! Book your next medibay visit, you’ll be coughing dust for weeks afterwards!”

Bumblebee tried to not look too long in his golden optics. He couldn’t stand to see the disappointment.

Breakdown came closer and held Bumblebee’s pauldron lightly, “Bee, say what you mean. I can take it, you know me.”

His optics alight with that comforting soft gleam and Bumblebee couldn’t help but yield.

“Stay,” he whispered. The silent sob called out, filling the silent field, and Bumblebee had never hated himself more, yet as he said it, he couldn’t deny how good it was to express what had been weighing on his mind for millennia. He wished he had it so many times before. He regretted not saying it more now. It was all too easy now that he’s begun. “I know it’s not my place to say this, but I need you to know. You’re needed here. I-we’ll miss you. And it scares me that this will be the last time I see you. That almost already happened countless times before! One day you’ll get into a dangerous accident, because you're a reckless fool, and we won’t be there to save you in time. I can’t,” he reset his vocalizer. “Please I can't go through with that again!"

“Bee…”

“I know! You have your own life and I wouldn’t ever wish to hold you back. I have my family now, I'm not really ever alone again because of that, yet you're part of this family too! Please, let us be in your life! We care about you. We love you,” he hesitated for a moment, “I love you! Don’t you get it. I always have, ever since that early morning several years ago on that racetrack that is nothing but rubble now. So, please, you stubborn, reckless aft, for once in your life, stay!”

He opened his optics, having shuttered them at some point, when he heard a soft chuckle. Breakdown was smiling. A genuine one, not like his usual smirk, a real and soft one that made Bumblebee’s spark twist and twirl.

“You’ve always been a slowpoke, little bee,” Breakdown said.

“Hey! You could’ve stayed all on your own but you needed me to say something first? I-”

Soft servos held his face gently. Breakdown stared into Bumblebee’s optics, waiting for rejection as he slowly inched closer. Their derma met smoothly, tasting like those energon sweets he always claimed he hated. Bumblebee smiled and pressed back against him, catching them all too eagerly. His head was tilted slightly up by Breakdown, giving himself more access to Bumblebee’s glossa, a slight catch of dentae against his derma, startled a gasp out of his vents.

Breakdown gave him a small peck on the nose and leaned against his forehead. “Sorry, is that too fast for you?”

Bumblebee gently pushed him. “Not fast enough! Do you have any idea how long I wanted you to do that?”

“I have an idea.”

“Wait, I confessed first! I finally beat you at something!” He gloated.

“Few thousand more and we’ll be tied!”

“You’re on!” Bumblebee laughed. He hesitated a moment. “So, does this mean you’re staying?”

Breakdown glanced at the road, seemingly lost for words. When he looked back at Bumblebee, there was the same determination that made Bumblebee fall for him the first night they met all those years ago. “For now. I’m not the best at keeping still for too long. Always been my weakness…but I think I’ve realized recently that I have more to give to the world beyond my races. Another side of me that deserves to be cared for. Loved.”

“You are,” Bumblebee said.

Breakdown smiled widely. “Still, I won’t stop racing though. I won’t ever stop. After all, I was forged for it!” He paused and wrapped his arm around Bumblebee’s waist, settling close to playfully glare at him. “And I’m still holding you to those previous race taunts! You’re not getting out of those just because I’m staying!”

Bumblebee rolled his optics.

“Only,” Breakdown continued, lowering his voice to an almost unintelligible whisper, “I…I want to stay this time. I think I always did. I guess it was never about where or why I was staying but myself keeping me from being there. I never allowed myself to stay. Afraid of getting hurt or losing loved ones. Except here, everyone loves each other without the fear of getting hurt. So, rather than running away from everything, it’s time I ran towards something. And someone.” Breakdown winked. “Just needed someone to knock some sense into me.”

“I thought I did that before.” So many times before.

“Yeah, but I got thick plating,” he knocked the top of his helm slightly, “and I finally got through to myself. All thanks to you.” He turned and waved at the distantly gathered family, all faking in their looking around tactic in a feeble attempt at giving them privacy. Nightshade waved eagerly at them. “And with a little extra help from your family.”

“Our family,��� Bumblebee adamantly said.

Breakdown smiled. “Our family.”

Bumblebee huffed and tried to play it off as another laugh. It quickly turned into soft sobs. Breakdown held him through it, letting him tuck his head into his neck cables. He could hardly believe he was staying. He’d found a reason.

Breakdown found his reason.

And like the many nights after, they would continue to stay together, racing one another into that star crystallized night.