#miss my alien girls
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Smosh vs aliens you live on forever in my heart
Thinking about what could have been for those four girls if they had not been forced to deal with those horrors..
Thinking of Tampa finally making friends and maybe finding a connection with Mary in their weirdness. Tampa learning to let go of her fears, Mary learning to let of her guilt over her parents situation, Mackenzie feeling loved and d cherished by her friends and winning her game and Tabitha becoming a gymnast and getting her well deserved medal. All the girls going to Mackenzie's games and cheering for her and going to Tabitha's competition and doing the same.
They could have been the best of friends and grown up together.
#i miss my girls#my poor crazy kids#mac would have adopted a dog#and they would have all played together#knife would have begrudgingly learned to appreciate the dog's company after bullying him again and again#knife and tampa making a truce and knife curling up next to her#the world was so cruel to them#smosh vs aliens#smosh#mackenzie smosh vs aliens#mary smosh vs aliens#tampa smosh vs aliens#tabitha smosh vs aliens#angela giarratana#amanda lehan canto#chanse mccrary#courtney miller
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romulus review: if the first movie didnt have enough explicit sex/pregnancy/birth horror for u go see alien: romulus! in theatres now!
#so gloop.#hamlet said hed wished for more crew so we'd have had some more grueome deaths lol#i have some minor gripes but overall a stunner#FLASHING LIGHTS WARNING IN THE END FOR REAL i missed a few minutes holding my eyes closed#andy was a srandout character with a standout performance. genuinely stole the show#xenomorph review: AWOOGA as always#she caught her like [flailing motions]#kay had such classic final girl vibes she was everythinggggg#also! new actors!! woohoooo#quite a few jumpscares but an appropriate amount id say. v nice#my haterisms are: 1) they couldve had a diff secondary synthetic#2) too many xenomorph#i like a few facehuggers bht too. many aliens and they become less scary somehow ykno#3) flashing lights ouch#he will by no means speak#alien romulus
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saw a post about projecting your ethnicity onto a character and started missing vespa ilkay. so so bad
#pov u grow up in a 3rd world country(/planet) where healthcare workers are exported by the thousands like cheap produce to richer countries#it's your ticket out of poverty as long as you can deal with the loneliness the separation from everyone you know the discrimination etc#ive never talked about my hc that vespas mother was one of them sending money every month visiting every couple of years until it just stop#like why return to the swamps when youre doing fine working on a richer planet w much better living conditions#cost of living rises every year. sending home a % of your salary used to be enough to support your husband and daughter and then it isnt#you know how it goes#vespa is also dead set on this path until ranga realizes that hemorrhaging healthcare workers leaves them with little to none of their own#students on scholarships or in community/state universities are bound by return service agreements and are forbidden to leave the country#until theyve rendered a few years of work on ranga to pay back their tuition + as a really shitty solution to the brain drain problem#this is real in my country btw but my professors say a lot of ppl do break their rsa's and fucked off to work in other countries LOL#our state unis can barely afford decent facilities they do nottt have the budget to chase down their own alumni in other countries!#but the mental image is a bit funny#vespa ilkays first crime: tinakasan ang rsa#i do also think it lines up with her having a network of med friends everywhere in the galaxy (heart of it all) you kind of go into pre/med#expecting most of your classmates to leave to work in other countries eventually. mine are aiming for the usa / uae / europe / japan etc#anyway whether vespa breaks her rsa or not she leaves ranga asap decides to switch careers and the rest is history#i also deeply love the fact that she's superstitious i'm very sad it wasn't highlighted more (i've only heard s1-3)#as someone who did grow up in a rural area and went to more albularyos/folk healers than doctors in my childhood. (they never failed me)#lots of folk illnesses (ex. balis; pasma) local medical superstitions (dont eat noodles in hospital; youll have a really toxic shift) etcc#theres also a lot of potential in tying her past as a rangian + med student + assassin to me idk how to word this properly#being raised on cautionary tales of not to touch/disturb anything in the swamps then being given free reign to poke & prod at things in her#lab classes (now with the proper ppe)....she was having so much fun with the curemother prime too lmao#years of walking hanging bridges docks boathouses in ranga etc gave her great balance & stealth#cracking open alien shellfish in the swamps to cutting open bodies for studying then for assassination....#I MISS HER SO MUCH BALIK KN SAKEN 😭😭😭😭😭😭#i get why most people + the canon focuses on her being an assassin bc people find that cooler i guess#but vespa being a swamp girl > 3rd world med student > assassin is so personal To Me. the whole pipeline. eugh.#skl.txt
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I feel so much more tormented than my other trans friends ngl
#I think maybe I feel alienated because a lot of my trans friends with confidence pride themselves on a sense of attractiveness#its not attractive in the normative sense but moreso within their idea of attractiveness#there’s not really anything wrong with this that I can put my finger on#I think it’s more that I just don’t value myself that way at all#I can’t overcome my dysphoria or insecurity by thinking that I’m hot. like I just don’t aspire to that#I remember telling some friends that I wished I could just be ugly#like ugly as in a state of not trying or having to try#not ugly as in any specific image#and I told them I didn’t care about being hot like it didn’t appeal#and they said ‘maybe being ugly is your way of feeling hot’#like no you guys missed the point#but idk how to express my point#I feel like if I transitioned I could just chill for once idk#I’d rather be an ugly boy than a pretty girl#family is always telling me I’m such a pretty girl despite everything I do#I’m gonna break their hearts
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first doomed yuri…now toxic yaoi…when will the gays be happy
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Sometimes it's weird growing up and like...idk not exactly having "femininity" gatekept from you, but never having like anyone teach or pressure me to do girly things, bcs now I just don't know how to do those things and I don't really have any desire to learn at this point, but on the other hand it very much makes me feel like I'm a goddamn alien sometimes.
#I dont have my ears peirced I dont know how to apply make up my friend had to teach me how to buy and wear a bra#there's this constant feeling that I am missing out on something all the girls around me got to have#and idk if I even want it!!#but it makes me feel like an alien#this is what I mean when I say I think hanging out with butch women would fix me
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Dirk Benedict in Blue Tornado (1991)
#this scene is gay#so much gay#i wont accept any criticism#i mean this fking man spent the whole fking film trying to find his 'best bud'/boyfriend he lost to the aliens#(thats exactly what happened)#while ignoring all together the random cute girl that tried so hard to get him laid#like a hug and thats it#no fucks given whatsover#while hes depressed the whole time cause his 'best friend' is missing#thats suspiciously suspicious#ever wanted a gay top gun? here it is#enough gayism to satisfy my 'flying buddies with homoerotic subplots' needs#blue tornado#dirk benedict
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human Strife enjoyers this is us
#mumblings#alien strife is a good take but unforch we are HIGHLY BIASED FOR A HUMAN STRIFE AS WE. HAVE A FICTIVE OF HIM AND HES SO SO SO BFHDJSBFHJSDB#i say as if the guy hasnt been mia for probably amonth. where is my favorite white man. what happened to him girl where are you.#aauauuhhhh.... William come home we miss you.#fun fact he is half of the reason for the Hosts namesake.
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benjulie's relationship from julie's pov me thinks
#i dont get how the fandom isnt tired of trying to blame their fallout in one or the other yet#like objetively speaking their relationship is a little tragic cause ben's hero life is the biggest reason for their breakup#but like that isnt even ben or julie's fault#oh “ben was a bad boyfriend” oh “julie wanted all of ben's attention”#how about oh these poor teenagers how in the hell are they gonna make that work#even adults would struggle to make that sort of thing work#they never stood a chance#dont get me wrong even without the omnitrix im sure they would have broken up#just not as messily#i just feel for the two of them :/#even if we took ben's super hero life out of the picture they would have struggled to work things out#like all teenagers do!!!#like how tf is ben supposed to be a multitasking king at age fifteen and julie supossed to not miss hanging out with her bf!!!#everyone focuses too much on the literal stuff like the tennis match and ben in duped#but like what julie was essentially asking for was just quality time and validation from her bf!#and ben was essentially trying to please everyone while sparing them from his inner struggles !!!#like honestly i kinda like benjulie in the basis that both ben's and julie's faults in their relationship are kinda realistic for their age#ik those faults come from poor/uncaring writing but honestly i remember highschool couples being way worse than benjulie#sigh anyways#i just wished people would stop assuming bens an asshole and julie a self centered and self serving girl#over their LESS THAN A YEAR OLD relationship in highschool#like shit they are gonna grow out of their bad behaviour i promise you#as for the cheating#honestly they are even in my eyes LOL#they both accidentally and unknowingly cheated on each other#yet again because of their terrible communication#ben 10#ben 10 omniverse#ben 10 alien force#ben 10 ultimate alien
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*remembers that homestuck is legal today* hey look it's those aliens
#hs#homestuck#413#vriska serket#terezi pyrope#kanaya maryam#HI HAPPY 413 EVERYONE :] I'm a little late but whateva#even though I don't regularly draw that much homestuck these days they still show up in my doodles a lot :> terezi is littered throughout#my sketchbook in particular#it's kind of insane to me how much of an impact this stupid comic had on my life though. might reread ?? that's a lot of time to get to#a lot of the convos I'm missing though. which were like.. way into act 6 lmao#anyway. these girls still mean the world to me though and I have no doubt there will be these weird little aliens scattered in my margins#for a good many years 2 come#anyway bye
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I finished Nona the Ninth and.... I was going to make a whole post outlining everything that confused and frustrated me about the book (because there is A Lot) but actually I think I can sum it up much faster. This is a story mostly focused on characters and people, and I often do not care about characters and people. I far prefer worldbuilding to nearly everything else and I think the worldbuilding is there, but it is not really being explained. There is a war happening, and I understand absolutely none of it. I don't understand the sides/factions, I don't understand the politicking happening, I don't understand the goals, I don't know who is leading what or why or where they are etc etc etc. And I don't know if that's a fault on my part as a reader or that it's simply not being explained well. In relation to that, everything is unreliable narrators. And I think I am coming to the conclusion I don't like that. It means I don't know what's actually happening ever and it is beginning to really frustrate me.
#tlt#I like the characters! I do! But I am really only attached to Gideon#I liked all the characters in Nona... but they arent very important to me#I like the making of Paul and thought that was very interesting and well written and moving#but that was pretty much the only character based piece of this story I really loved#Idk. I am going to finish the series.... but I don't understand anything#I think I will have to reread everything but even then idk if I'll pick up all the pieces#I also have opinions about the fact all of it feels like it's happening on post apocalyptic earth....#but it's supposed to be on alien planets and 10000 years in the future. I feel like it should feel far more alien#I did like getting John's backstory and explaination. but I also think he may be an unreliable narrator so I don't trust what he said#and I don't get why everything that happened in his story happened... and like I guess that piece doesn't matter so much cause 10000 years#but it bothers me#AND AGAIN MY GIRL GIDEON WAS BARELY IN THE BOOK#idk. I just want to know who is fighting. why are the fighting. what do they all want. WHERE are they fighting. how are they fighting.#what all science is there. what space travel is there. how does the space travel work.#better explainations of the magic. and the river. what was the tower in the river. (i think some of that will be addressed later)#(or at least i fucking hope so)#idk. I feel like some of this is explained and I just missed it... but I think some of it is absolutely glossed over#and I don't hate open ended worldbuilding entirely but I want better scaffolding#I DONT KNOW. I feel like I'm being mean and so I feel bad#like it's a good book and so many people like them#and I liked them at the beginning!!! but now I'm just confused and frustrated#and I don't know if it's my fault and I'm just too stupid to pick on things and context and hints and stuff#or if it actually was all that poorly explained
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everyone say thank u to my roommate for going to visit her parents this weekend so I can jack it loud and nasty 🙏
#i love her but there are some benefits to having the flat to myself.... love getting to wander around in just my boxers + a tshirt too#things i could do while she was still here if i wasnt a pussy 🙄#jk itd just make her uncomfortable and im too respectful for that#having a lowkey crush on her is an endless comedy to me bc we would be so woefully incompatible romantically#and also sexually.. historically ive only ever stone topped bc ive never been comfortable enough w anyone to let them fuck me#despite very much Not being stone or exclusively a top. and i think shes some form of sex repulsed anyway so like. sits there dead silence#and also shes so in love with her other friends and i showed up late to that party.... ive been feeling kinda guilty lately bc ik-#she misses them a lot and wishes we'd be able to stay roommates w them too. and im a pretty poor replacement for them tbh#and i love spending time with her but whenever i do i feel kinda painfully aware im not them like i could never fill that space#and asking to hang out more with her always feels like im taking away from time she could be talking to them. or even being alone ik she-#likes her own company and i get that a lot too so its chill but ahh.. man#i dont mean this in a bitter or jealous way at all like theyre all such sweet ppl i couldnt ever hold it against them#theyre kind of a 3 headed cerberus type situation and im like. the stray puppy they found on the side of the road#theres nothing they can do differently i was just born to be alienated from other ppl forever until i die. and someday i hope ill-#finally get used to it and accept i wont ever feel like im enough for anyone else or feel like anything else is enough for me#old wounds healed over 5082 times that still hurt to touch but i cant help pressing my fingers into them anyway bc its a familiar pain etc#anyway lost where i was going with this its just been on my mind again recently. i hate to be pitied i hate to feel like im only included-#bc they didnt want me to feel left out i hate feeling like a shoddy secondhand stand-in and its been a lot of that lately#also been a little annoyed bc sometimes it feels like shes trying to micromanage my social life and girl. we're not close enough for that#im sure its well intentioned but im not part of what they have going on i cant compete in that ring so dont try to push me into it..#ahhh. its all ok tho one of the guys is coming to visit next month which will be rly fun but ill try to give them some space too#its good at least im doing this processing now bc group situations can be spike traps of triggers for me sometimes#regardless of how good friends i am w ppl and ive already had a wobble a few weeks ago w how i cope and i dont want it to become a#fully fledged regular issue again bc its so hard to crawl back out of that pit. anyway losing coherence here im gonna stop rambling#and go make myself an early dinner and then back to drawing........#sorry for long tags if ur reading this blows u a kiss but go find a better use of ur time girl!!#.diaries
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I watched Knock At The Cabin and I'm not sure how I feel about it but it was better than I expected. I mean, at this point with M Night Shyamalan I just go in prepared for deep disappointment, and I didn't get that!
#knock at the cabin#m night shyamalan#or according to my dictation app#I'm not sure I'm all in#which isn't that far off really#I mean it's exactly how I feel about his movies#after the shitty ending to unbreakable#I mean otherwise unbreakable was a great movie#I truly enjoyed signs but I know a lot of people didn't either because the religious stuff was too much or because why the hell#would aliens who can't come into contact with liquid water without severe injury#come to this planet of all places#but hey maybe it's only fresh liquid water!#maybe saltwater/ocean water are just fine!#and they thought liquid fresh water is only a tiny fraction of what exists on our planet compared to saline#they can totally avoid it!#I didn't hate the village I appreciated what it was trying to do but still it was a little clunky#somehow I totally missed the one with Mark Wahlberg and the killer trees#definitely did not see his Airbender one#did see the girl in the water and again that was okay but also meh#I can't go into all the reasons why because I don't remember#except that again he does tend to be a wee bit heavy handed with the spiritual themes#which I guess happened again here in knock at the cabin#but Jonathan groff did his groffing and that redeemed a lot if it#jonathan groff#!!!!#and I do always love the Philadelphia and neighboring counties references#looks like peacock also has the sixth sense so he thinks I'm going to rewatch that one#poor M Night Shyamalan his first movie is still his best#it's not even a contest
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cleared a lot of my inbox save new things for mizuki ! i will be working on writing a drabble about her 'dream' of the hunger games simulator hosted by @kingdom-of-mxginica who i recommend! / and also, to those that helped and cared about mizuki in the games as best as they could in that situation, or any who didn't interact and want to, to those that did and want to meet her in the real world aka minus the hunger games, an open starter. i want everyone she met or didn't to get a chance to know her and good or bad, form some kind of interactions ! i follow so many gifted people and so many were involved in that game. i also just think it's a good opportunity. also i have asks and threads to do, so please be patient as those will come after along with my replies on my original character , @goldspun .
#i think it's safe to say mizuki is my main muse at this point.#i love mari too so much but the confidence i feel on mizuki is vastly different than the shyness i'm trying to overcome on miss mari#i'll also be watching s.tar trek with a good friend tonight so there's that which is exciting!#yes i put mizuki in space yes she will lift a starship at some point#yes i made her an aLIEN#i'm excited lmao#but yeah seeing so many interactions and just /watching/ that game gave me lots of inspo to keep working and thinking deeper on my girls#𝐏𝐒𝐀 *ೃ༄ do you wanna get your ass kicked?#𝐎𝐎𝐂 *ೃ༄ what looks gone but comes back even stronger.
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Trust yourself trust yourself
Look how much you've improved your art before and aftet
Yeahhhh uhh I'm not so sure about before and after things.
#miss girl's head look so detached from her body#looking like an alien#i like cute things though#not the first one#i love her character though#i just hate my art of her
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when someone makes a good point but their very next post is crying out “PURITANS!!!!” and defending f!b/yleth’s outfit lmao
#like you need to understand the context my dude. when they're a guy they get normal clothes#but when making them a 'girl' they get a tit window belly window giant eyes ugly tights#they suddenly become an overdesigned mess cos they dont know how to portray women any other way for some reason???#these two designs are supposed to be the same character.#so either make them both dress the same lmao#like give the guy version alien big ugly eyes and equally ugly clothes#its a miracle f s/hez looks normal in comparison#cos they went back to being weird for the next game#rantings rambles#god i miss robin fire emblem
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