#mix it all up so we can have kim x winner for sure

[scarefox]

I am begging Pit Babe to stop throwing high quality ghost ships at me if they will not become canon 😭🙏

[baepsaesbae]

QuaranTime

Pairing— Kim Seokjin x reader x Min Yoongi  

Genre— SMUT like str8 up pwp

Warnings— Double penetration, threesome, oral (f receiving), nipple  play, a butt slap, masturbation (male), unprotected sex, sensual themes in general

Word Count—  ~2.6k  

Summary— Bored and horny with your roommates during a social distancing period. What could go wrong?    

A/N— Hi everyone! I hope you’re all staying safe and healthy~ Here’s a little something that will hopefully help lift your mood. Please let me know what you think!                                

 Your roommates have always been competitive. That was one of the first things you noticed about them when you moved in. They competed to see who could help you move in the fastest (which was a blessing since you didn’t have to do any heavy lifting). Living with two random guys was an interesting thing to get used to, especially when they were already friends. It’s been a year since you moved in, and since then all three of you had gotten pretty close.

Now, due to the ongoing pandemic, everyone has been ordered to stay inside. It’s been months now, and you could swear you were all going insane. Playing board or card games always resulted in a sore loser (one or both of the boys). Day drinking had become such a common occurrence that even the thought of alcohol made you guys feel queasy, so that was out of the question now.

“Whoever does the next grocery trip can get puzzles?” you offered.

“You think I wanna do puzzles with Jin? That guy has no patience. I give him five minutes before he starts getting bored,” Yoongi scoffed.

“You WISH you lasted five minutes!” Jin childishly argued.

“We all know you’re a one pump chump,” Yoongi rolled his eyes.

You observed them silently from the couch, doing your best not to smile. They’ve been your main source of entertainment during these trying times. Their bickering was comparable to cheesy reality TV shows.

“What are you laughing at over there?” Jin dragged you into the conversation.

“Can you guys make fun of each other’s sex lives later? Let’s get back to curing our current boredom,” you responded.

“We have too much testosterone built up right now. Let us yell at each other for a bit first,” Jin said before turning back to Yoongi, “I think it’s pretty obvious who gets the most action around here!”

“You don’t SEE the girls I bang because I go over to THEIR place like a GENTLEMAN,” Yoongi raised his voice.

“So what? Are you guys gonna jack off in front of each other to prove who can last the longest?” you laughed.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Jin’s squeaky laugh filled the room, “Unless…” he shot a sideways glance at Yoongi.

“There’s no way in hell that I’m doing that,” Yoongi immediately dismissed the thought, “But ___...how are you holding up?”

“Me? I’m fine. Online classes are weird but most of my professors are being super lenient so--”

“Not that,” he interrupted you, “You know…like uh...”

“He’s asking if you’re sexually frustrated,” Jin explained bluntly.

“Okay, I know I don’t get nearly as many dick appointments as you two but I make do,” you answered defensively.

“I may have an idea to settle our argument, but we’d need your help,” Yoongi tilted his head in contemplation.

“Are you guys both gonna fuck me?” you asked, now amused at the thought.

“Yes and no. If you’re okay with it, we’d be going at the same time. One in the front and one in the back. Unless you want both of us in the back, that part is up to you. Whoever cums first loses,” Yoongi explained.

“What does the winner get?” you try to mask your interest, it’s been so long since you’ve had any physical intimacy.

“They get to have fun with you all night long while the loser has to sit and watch,” Jin answered gleefully.

Both boys seemed to be completely on board with the idea. All they needed was for you to give them the green light.

“You guys are positive that things won’t be weird afterward?” you asked.

They both gave you their word. You took it with a grain of salt, knowing that neither of them have been laid in weeks. To be honest, you have been extremely horny lately. Living with two handsome guys wasn’t helping you. All rational thoughts were thrown out the window.

“I’d prefer one in the front and one in the back then,” you winked.

“Coin toss to see who’s where?” Yoongi suggested to Jin.

“Tails cuz I want that ass,” Jin answered with a smirk, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Dammit, tails,” Yoongi announced.

“Are we just going straight into this then?” you asked nervously.

“Don’t be silly. We’re gentlemen, foreplay is our middle name,” Jin took you by the hand and led you to Yoongi’s room, “It’s your idea, so we’re gonna use your room,” Jin said before Yoongi could complain.

They sat you on the bed, and that’s when things suddenly got awkward. All three of you stared at each other in silence, waiting for the first person to make a move. You were beginning to doubt your decision, and almost opened your mouth to call it off.

“Can I kiss you, ___?” Yoongi broke the silence.

“Uh, sure,” you agreed, scooting over to make space for him on the bed.

Yoongi shyly sat down beside you, showing you a side of him that you’ve never seen before. He softly brought his hand to your cheek as your eyes met. Your heart was racing, and you were sure Yoongi could hear it as he leaned in closer.

Meeting Yoongi in the middle was a dream come true. Admittedly, you’ve had a minor crush on both of them since you’ve moved in, but who could blame you?

Yoongi’s soft lips brushed up gently against yours. You found yourself melting into his palm as he continued to cup your face. The kiss was gentle and intimate, something you never wanted to end. Until you were abruptly yanked from Yoongi’s grasp.

“Hey what the fu--”

“My turn,” was all that Jin said before his lips crashed against yours.

Unlike Yoongi’s tender kiss, Jin kissed you with such a ferocious passion, it was almost as if you’d been dating and he hadn’t seen you in months. His hands immediately began to wander across your body, starting from your hips and working their way upward. You softly moaned into his mouth when his hands slid under your shirt to fondle your breasts. You yelped with surprise when he began to pinch and pull at your nipples.

“You’re so sensitive,” he chuckled, “This’ll be fun.”

“Stop hogging her,” Yoongi grumbled.

“Make me,” Jin challenged.

Yoongi yanked you away from Jin, and pushed you onto your back. His plush lips connected with your neck, aka your weak spot. You stifled a moan as he began to mix in small nibbles with his kisses.

“Take off your pants,” he ordered you, his dominance reemerging.

You shook off your pajama pants, revealing a plain pair of panties. You suddenly wished that you had gone to change into something sexier, and as such your body involuntarily shied away from Yoongi.

Jin pinned your legs down. He was about to kiss your stomach when Yoongi shooed him away. Jin was displeased but obeyed anyway, curious to see what the younger man would do. Yoongi kissed a trail down your neck, between your breasts, across your stomach, and finally settled at the top of your panties. He planted kisses on your inner thighs, inching closer and closer to your pussy.

“Let’s get this off,” Jin focused your attention back on him as he tugged at your shirt.

“Then you guys have to take yours off too,” you huffed.

“Of course, princess,” Jin kissed your forehead, his sudden affection making you freeze.

He helped you take off your shirt, and in turn took his off afterward. You were about to make a comment on his physique when Yoongi flattened his tongue against your clothed core.

“Don’t ignore me,” Yoongi growled.

“Take off your shirt,” Jin reminded him.

“In due time, I don’t think she wants to wait any longer,” Yoongi said as he pulled aside your panties.

He licked up from your entrance to your clit. His tongue teased your clit in slow circles, causing you to moan. You covered your mouth in embarrassment, but Jin swatted your hand away.

“Don’t ignore me either,” he whispered as his lips once again connected with yours.

Jin played with your nipples as his mouth collided with yours. His kisses were wet and messy, but you didn’t care. You were lost in ecstacy. Yoongi’s mouth was heaven sent; every flick of his tongue had you moaning into Jin’s mouth. You gasped when he stuck a finger inside, curling to hit your g-spot.

“I think she’s ready,” Yoongi cockily stated.

“You ready for us baby?” Jin asked sweetly.

A simple head nod was all you could give them without getting too flustered. You couldn’t believe that you were in this situation. You were roughly flipped over onto your stomach before you could think too much about it.

The boys tugged off their pants and positioned themselves on either side of you. You looked up at Yoongi with anticipation. The moment he looked down and saw you, his cheeks reddened and he had to look away.

“You can take it out...if you want,” Yoongi muttered.

You didn’t hesitate to tug down his underwear, revealing his thick dick. You began to salivate on sight, you’ve never seen such a pretty cock before. You got closer to lick it when a sharp pain stung your ass.

“We have to go at the same time. Bad girl,” Jin admonished.

You felt him run his cock against your wet pussy, teasing you even more.

“Wait, shit. I should go get a condom,” Jin groaned in frustration.

“Just pull out,” you said softly.

“What?” the boys asked in unison with disbelief.

“I’m on the pill so it should be fine. I mean, as long as you’re both clean I’m okay with you guys pulling out,” you clarified.

“You sure?” Jin asked.

You nodded again.

“Alright then. Should I go get a timer?” Jin asked Yoongi.

“It doesn’t fucking matter. Please, I just want her to suck me off already,” Yoongi grew impatient.

“Fine, fine. In 3, 2, 1,” Jin counted down.

The boys entered you in perfect harmony. Jin’s long dick penetrated you deeply, and the curvature of his dick allowed him to graze your g-spot with every stroke. Yoongi let you take the lead as soon as the tip of his dick entered your mouth. He was worried about choking you, so he stood in place. Jin’s powerful thrusts made you gag on Yoongi’s cock anyway. Tears welled in your eyes as Yoongi hit the back of your throat.

There you were, being spitroasted between your roommates. Just the thought alone was enough to get you all riled up. Here you were, living your best life.

You did your best to flatten out your tongue to let Yoongi’s dick slide neatly in and out of your mouth. Unfortunately, Jin’s rough strokes had you moaning uncontrollably. Drool dribbled down your chin and there was nothing you could do about it. You looked up at Yoongi, only to find that his eyes were already set on you.

That did him in.

“Where should I cum? I’m gonna--oh fuck,” Yoongi stuttered as he unleashed his load into your mouth.

Jin was still thrusting, making Yoongi’s explosion even messier. Yoongi collapsed onto the bed beside you, defeated. Jin finally stopped moving and got off the bed.

“You okay?” Yoongi asked you.

You nodded after swallowing some of his cum. Jin came back with a warm washcloth and wiped off your face. He even handed you a glass of water. You were happy to see that his kindhearted nature was incorporated into every aspect of his life.

“No water for me?” Yoongi joked.

“No water for losers,” Jin said sternly, “Besides, the night is just getting started.”

You were flipped onto your back (which was a blessing, you were tired of having to prop yourself up with your arms). Jin smirked above you as his hand made a beeline down to your dripping pussy. He fiddled with your sensitive nub, making you squirm beneath him.

“You’re such a good girl, ___,” he cooed, “Don’t worry, I’ll treat you right.”

He inserted himself back in. Instead of resuming his rough pace from before, he took an agonizingly long time to bottom out. He used the same slow pace to pull out. You figured he was going to do it again, but you were wrong. This time, he opted to roll his hips into you. The sensation was different, and it allowed him to set a rhythm that was optimal for both of you. Judging by the high pitch of your moans, he figured you enjoyed it. He was absolutely right.

Yoongi moved to cup your face once more. He was leaning in to kiss you when Jin forcefully pushed him off the bed.

“Dude, what the he--”

“Losers don’t belong on the bed. They definitely don’t get to touch her for the rest of the night,” he snarled as he brought your knees by your ears.

This position let him hit even deeper, which you didn’t even think was possible. Again, he began to roll his hips. He leaned over to kiss you, forcing you to moan into his mouth.

“Hold your legs for me, princess,” Jin whispered.

You complied. As soon as his hands were free, one of them began to stimulate your clit. He went straight to rubbing you quickly, wasting no time in toying with you. It seemed as if he was desperate to make you cum before he did.

From the corner of your eye, you spotted Yoongi sitting at his desk chair, his eyes fixated on you. His pretty hand was wrapped around his fat cock, pumping it quickly. It looked like he wanted to cum with you too. His sweaty hair stuck to his forehead, and his mouth was agape as he concentrated on you. Yoongi gave you a little smile when you looked over at him. This time, it was his turn to make you come undone. That, and of course Jin going to town on you.

“I’m c-coming,” you announced as your body spasmed.

Jin helped you ride out your orgasm, his hand quickened over your clit. The extra stimulus made you squirt all over him, something you’ve never done in your life. Once he was sure that you’ve come down, Jin quickly went to jack himself off over you.

“Fuck, you’re so hot,” he panted before he splattered all over your chest.

Again, Jin went to go get a warm washcloth. In his absence, Yoongi quickly made his way onto the bed to cuddle you. He was the big spoon, and he brought you in close to his chest.

“Did you cum again?” you giggled as you asked.

“I did. Don’t look at my underwear. It was the quickest thing I could grab to clean myself off before Jin came back,” he answered.

“Dude, my cum is still all over her,” Jin said when he got back.

Yoongi just shrugged and kissed your cheek as Jin wiped you off.

“Guess I’m the little spoon then,” Jin said as he wiggled his way into the cuddle session, “Did you enjoy it, ___?” he inquired.

“I did. Maybe a little too much. I’ve never squirted before,” you admitted.

“I can always make you do it again,” Jin laughed.

“I can do it too,” Yoongi chimed in.

“You think you can do that? You can’t even last in her mouth!” Jin mocked.

“You would’ve cum first too if you were in my position!” Yoongi yelled back.

“Looks like you guys have another argument to settle,” you joked, trying to join in the teasing.

“Bet,” Jin said.

“Oh, you’re so on,” Yoongi sneered.

They agreed that the new bet is to be settled at the same time, different place (Jin’s room) tomorrow. You wouldn’t mind spending the rest of your isolated days like this.

Published September 18th, 2020. No editing, copying, translating, or reposting allowed. All Rights Reserved © 2020 Baepsaesbae.

[d-noona]

THE PLAYBOY ASSIGNMENT

Summary:

Persuading a millionaire to part with a fortune seemed like mission impossible. Especially as the man in question turned out to be Min Yoongi - April's first love.

Eight years ago, Yoongi had stormed out of her life, believing she was having another man's baby. Convincing him otherwise, whilst sweet-talking him into helping a worthy cause, would be tricky. Even more so when he insisted negotiations take place in the bedroom! Suddenly, April was struggling to remember that the playboy assignment was business not pleasure!

Min Yoongi x Original Character

MASTERLIST

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2

Even as she raised her head to look at him, April told herself it was impossible. The Min Yoongi she'd known hadn't even owned a necktie, much less a pin-striped suit, and he was far more likely to flash a rude slogan on the front of a sweatshirt than his initials embroidered on a cuff.

Impossible.

She'd set herself up, that was what happened. The walk through the cemetery had prompted her to think of Yoongi -and once those memories had been activated, all it took to set them spinning out of control again was a baritone voice and a chance monogram...

It was quite a coincidence, those initials. But the voice was easily explained; this man did sound a little like Yoongi - or, to be more accurate, her eight years old memory of Yoongi.

April fixed a smile on her lips so she could properly greet a man who was not - who could not be - Min Yoongi.

And she looked up into a pair of cat like brown eyes, surrounded with long, dark, curly lashes. Eyes she had thought, once or twice, that she could drown in. Including that eight years ago in the cemetery, when he had kissed her so long and so well that her scattered senses had allowed the worst idea of her life to look like a winner.

Yoongi's eyes. It was impossible -but it was also undeniable.

"Well," he said. In his rich baritone, the single word seemed to carry an entire encyclopedia of meaning. Or did it only seem that way to April's guilty conscience?

Not guilty, she reminded herself. She'd been foolish, yes - and impetuous and perhaps even idiotic - but she had nothing to feel guilty about. She held out her hand to him and willed her voice to stay steady. "Yoongi."

His hand was warm firm and strong. April's fingers felt fragile and shaky in his grip.

Namjoon stared down at her. Though he was obviously thunderstruck, he recovered in moments. "You know each other? But-but that's wonderful! Old friends, I suppose?"

Prompted, April stumbled through the introductions.

"Min Yoongi," Namjoon said thoughtfully. "I don't believe I've heard the name."

"Oh, of course April wouldn't have mentioned me." Yoongi said. Only the slightest emphasis set the last word apart, but there was no more doubt in his voice than there was humor in his smile.

Irritation surged through April's veins. His meaning could hardly have been clearer even if he'd come straight and said they'd been lovers. Of course, if he had, she could not only have denied it, but any listener would have doubted his motives. This was far more cunning. The implication was perfectly obvious - she could see from the expression in Namjoon's eyes that he'd gotten the message loud and clear. And yet, Yoongi hadn't really said a thing.

:No. I don't believe I ever brought up your name." she said coolly. "You were hardly important enough."

Yoongi lifted his eyebrows. "But of course, my dear. What else could I have meant?"

That you were important to talk about, which was precisely what Namjoon may be thinking about right now. April's annoyance was mixed with reluctant admiration at the way he's so neatly boxed her into a corner. The Yoongi she'd known had been as transparent as glass. Just when -and how - had the man learned to be so smooth?

Not that it mattered. April told herself firmly, what Namjoon - or anyone else thought.

Yoongi turned back to Namjoon. "It's rude of me to bring up ancient history. You shared Si-Hyuk's interest in art, you said?"

The tinge of irony in Yoongi's voice was so subtle that April almost doubted her own ears, despite the demonstration she'd just suffered at his hands. For an instant she wondered if he'd recognized Namjoon's name, and therefore doubted the casualness of his interest. But she concluded it wasn't likely; The Moonchild was far from prominent as yet, and it's director was hardly a household word across the country. Then she followed Yoongi's gaze over Namjoon's shoulder to one of Si-Hyuk's favorite and most recent acquisitions, and knew why he was feeling ironic.

"I find his taste - shall we say, interesting?" Yoongi went on. "Personally, I'd probably use that thing to wipe the mud off my shoes."

April braced herself.

The work was a long way from being her favorite. The artist - and she used the term loosely where Kim Taehyung was concerned - had used a housepainter's brush to smear three slashes of blood-red pigment on a huge white canvas, and then left it to drip. April thought it looked like something from a butcher's shop. Namjoon, on the other hand, considered the painting a master work. When he'd taken April to the gallery to see Si-Hyuk's new purchase, Namjoon had been shocked by her lukewarm reaction. He'd spent the next half hour instructing her on artistic genius and the intricacies of expressionistic symbolism - at least April thought that's what he called it. Her eyes had begun to glaze only a couple of minutes into the lecture.

She couldn't wait to see Yoongi's reaction to that same speech.

Namjoon, too had turned to look at the painting. "Oh, well, that sort of thing," he said tolerantly. "Si-Hyuk would have his little jokes now and then."

April blinked in surprise, remembering the outlandish price he'd told her Si-Hyuk had paid. Then the metallic taste of fear rose in her throat. She'd forgotten, just for a moment, Namjoon's implication that he only dabbled in art. Surely, she thought, he wasn't crazy enough to continue that charade, now that he'd had a chance to take Yoongi's measure...

"Not all collection is blatant," Namjoon went on. "Si-Hyuk actually had a few art pieces which aren't half bad."

A voice in the back of her brain told her to stop him, no matter what it took, before he offered Yoongi a favor by taking the problematic pieces off his hands. But she was mesmerized by the pressure of Namjoon's fingers on her elbow, and unable to protest.

'Blatant," Yoongi murmured. "What an interesting choice of words."

"In fact," Namjoon went on, "If you're looking for someone to help value things for the estate-"

"That's very thoughtful," Yoongi said. "I wonder where Jung Hoseok went. He's the one who'll handle all that." He glanced around the foyer, his six extra inches of height giving him the advantage of being able to look over most of the crowd, and gestured to someone April couldn't see.

Jung Hoseok. The name hit her like a rock. Hoseok was Si-Hyuk's attorney - the one Namjoon had talked to about the will. If Jung Hoseok recognized Namjoon's name...

Namjoon, however, seemed unconcerned. His smile was firmly in place.

A tall handsome man hurried up. "You wanted me, Yoongi?"

"Hoseok, I'd like you to meet April..." Yoongi paused.

Doesn't he even remember my name? April through irritably. "Park," she said coolly.

"Still? Or again?"

April felt marginally better. Yoongi's hesitation made sense after all: there was a good chance that in eight years she'd have married - and perhaps divorced, as well. At least he hadn't assumed she'd married Namjoon; maybe she should award him a point or two for that.

"Still."

"What a shame," Yoongi said softly. "I seem to remember you were determined to have a wedding. And with good reason, too."

Fury rose in April's throat. And if he solicitously asks what went wrong with my plans, she thought grimly, I'll strangle him.

But Yoongi had moved straight on to introduce Namjoon. "He offered to help appraise Si-Hyuk's collection, Hobi."

The attorney stretched out a hand. "That's very generous of you Mr. Kim. Your opinion would be valuable. As the director of the Moonchild-"

Namjoon's fingers tightened on April's elbow; it was the only sign of surprise she could detect. "Actually," he said casually, "I didn't exactly volunteer my services. The time constraints which come along with my job prevent me from doing appraisals. What I meant to say was, if you'd like to help valuing the estate's art, I'm sure April would be happy to pitch in."

April opened her mouth to protest, and closed it again. She felt like a balloon with a slow leak. Now she knew that the tightened grip of Namjoon's hand hadn't been due to surprise after all; it had been more in the nature of a warning. He'd had this planned all along. She could feel Yoongi's gaze drifting over her face, appraising her every feature, every expression. "And April is...qualified?" he asked.

She couldn't stay silent any longer. "Namjoon, I hardly think that I-"

"Nonsense," Namjoon said firmly. "Of course she's qualified. Don't underestimate your talent, April."

"Or your resources," Yoongi added, very gently. "You know Hoseok, I believe I believe I might take more of an interest in Si-Hyuk's collection myself -under the circumstances."

His hand still on her elbow, Namjoon guided April across the foyer and into the broad hallway that led toward the dining room at the back of the house. Most of the crowed had moved on toward the buffet tables, and for a few moments, in the shadow of the staircase, the two of them were completely alone.

"I think that went very well," Namjoon said.

The note of self-satisfaction in his voice grated on April's nerves. "Then all I can say is that I'd like to see your definition of disaster. The only that could have made it worse as if you'd offered to buy everything outright at some bargain-basement price."

Namjoon tipped his head to one side and considered. "It's an idea. Min might actually have gone for it."

April went on ruthlessly. "But Mr. Jung Hoseok would know you were trying to scam his client, and then you'd be in the soup and the museum would lose all credibility."

"That's an interesting point," Namjoon mused. "Why he knew me, I mean, I didn't mention the museum when I called about the will. Si-Hyuk must have told him about me along the way. April do you really believe I'm so short sided I'd try to pass myself off as an amateur?"

"It looked to me as if you were making a pretty good stab at it."

"I did nothing of sort, I simply didn't boast of my position, my education, or my background. If the man wanted to draw conclusions..."

April stood her ground. "You deliberately tried to convince him that the Kim Taehyung canvas was worth less."

"I was being diplomatic. Feeling out his tastes. Trying to establish a bond. All good gallery owners do that sort of thing, or they'd never sell a single piece. It's no thanks to you, by the way, that I read him so clearly. Why didn't you tell me you knew him?"

"Because I didn't know it myself until it was too late to run," April admitted.

"You look a little stunned," Namjoon said. "What was that stuff about weddings, anyway? You didn't marry the man, did you?"

"No." April's throat was dry, her voice taut.

"That's good. If you had, I'd really wonder about your judgement. I grant you, for a couple of minutes I was a bit unsure about him, myself. His clothes weren't bad, not at all. And the name...I wonder how somebody like that ended up with such an aristocratic name. There was once an Empress that had the same last name as his."

"Funny," April muttered. "My mother asked almost the same thing once."

"But I knew as soon as he looked blankly at that magnificent Kim Taehyung canvas that my first instinct was right." Namjoon shuddered. "The very idea of threatening to wipe his feet on it! I only hope Kim Taehyung doesn't hear what I said about his work!"

"I doubt the two of them hang around the same circles."

Namjoon laughed. "That's certainly true."

"And all good gallery owners talk that way, don't they, to gain the customer's confidence?" April didn't even try to keep the sarcasm out of her voice. "Namjoon, about this assignment you've saddled me with...Surely you don't expect me to pass myself off as a staff member, because I won't do it."

"Oh no. We'll refer to you as -let's see..."

She cut in ruthlessly. "We'll call me exactly what I am - the museum's public relations representative."

"Actually," Namjoon mused, "that's ideal. Because of your inexperience..."

"I thought you told Yoongi I was qualified?" April smirked.

Namjoon shrugged. "I didn't say expert. So any errors can easily be passed off..."

"Are you saying you want me to make errors?"

"April, my dear, you'll have all the of the museum's resources to draw on. And I can expect you to use all the expertise the Moonchild can provide you, including me."

"I suppose that means you'll make the errors? Never mind." She is starting to get frustrated as she throws her hands up in surrender.

"I'm still determined to end up with this collection April. So just remember, if you value things high, you'll have to raise the money to pay for the and explain to the board why they're worth so much."

"And if I value them low, I'll end up looking like a fool!"

"Oh I doubt that," Namjoon said easily. "Didn't you see the way he was looking at you, sort of like a hungry wolf? I imagine, if you play your cards right, you'll be able to keep Min Yoongi from asking any questions at all."

[wrestlingisfake]

Slammiversary preview

This is Impact's 19th anniversary show, although they didn't start using this name until the 3rd anniversary, and now they always hold it a month after the actual anniversary date. For the first time since March 2020, Impact will have fans at the show, but on a limited basis. So I would expect maybe 50-100 people spaced pretty far apart.

The show airs live tonight on Fite.tv. The pre-show is free and begins at 7pm EDT; the main show is $39.99 and starts at 8pm EDT.

Kenny Omega vs. Sami Callihan - Callihan is challenging for the Impact men's world title, which is represented by two of the four belts that Omega currently holds. The other two, the AEW and AAA men's world titles, are not at stake. This is billed as "no DQ match" which ought to mean that the winner gets to go to Dairy Queen but probably means can't be disqualified.

Omega and his henchmen interfered in a Callihan vs. Moose match on June 3, causing Callihan to win by disqualification. Since Moose was the #1 contender at the time, officials considered adding Sami to the Omega vs. Moose match on June 12, but ultimately they decided to book the winner to face Callihan here. The storyline is that Omega's manager Don Callis keeps arguing that Callihan is too reckless and unprofessional to be in a world title match, but we all know he's really just worried that Sami could hurt Omega real bad and win the title.

If it was me, I'd have done Omega-Callihan last month to set up Omega-Moose here. (Moose's contract negotiations may have made that impractical.) I don't buy Sami as the big destination for one of the biggest Impact shows of the year. I want to be interested in Omega trying to figure out how to deal with a misfit deathmatch guy. But Sami comes across more like a guy playing a misfit deathmatch guy. I mean, I wouldn't want to meet him in a dark alley, but I'd rather do that than listen to his corny supervillain speeches or look at his Roman Reigns cosplay.

At this point I'm seriously wondering where they're going with Omega invading Impact, so I'm willing to believe they could wrap it up any day now and get the title off of him. Omega has to drop the belt to somebody, and I can see Impact picking Callihan, even if I'd pick somebody else. Even so, I still want to think there's a long-term plan in place, and that the blowoff won't come until at least the October pay-per-view. So I'm expecting this match will just come down to another wave of run-ins and shenanigans so Omega can retain.

Ultimate X match - This is a six-way match for Josh Alexander's Impact X division championship. The ring will be set up with four columns at each corner, which support either cables or scaffolding that cross overhead like a giant "X." The title belt will be hung from the center, and the first participant to pull it down will be the winner and champion. So it's like a ladder match, but there are no ladders.

Impact introduced this as one of their signature match types back in 2003, and they've always been rather proud of it. Personally I have trouble getting into it, since all the spots revolve around falling off of things, and all the "near-falls" involve slowly inching across a high-wire or a scaffold.

The six participants are: Josh Alexander, Petey Williams, Trey Miguel, Ace Austin, Rohit Raju, and Chris Bey. The storyline is that Austin and Raju have formed an alliance, and since no one can be disqualified they plan to gang up on the competition with their respective henchmen (Madman Fulton and Shera). Alexander, Williams, and Miguel are trying to stick together to oppose this, and Bey has reluctantly sided with them.

Alexander recently won a sixty-minute iron man match to add to his credentials as a dominant champion, so in theory this match is meant to secure his legacy as an all-time great in the division. Problem is, if he wins he's effectively cleaned out the division, and if he loses it's yet another situation where the champion didn't get pinned to lose the X title, setting up yet another multi-man X title match. Nevertheless, I'd much, much rather keep the belt on Alexander and have him move on to new business (maybe against a recent WWE castoff), so I guess I'm rooting for him to win.

Deonna Purrazzo vs. ? - Purrazzo is scheduled to defend the women's title against a mystery opponent who won't be revealed until right before the match starts. The storyline is that Purrazzo has cleaned out the division (a trope that's getting worn very thin in pro wrestling these days), so she's gotten overconfident, and Gail Kim set this up to truly put her to the test. They haven't said the opponent can't be Kim herself, although Kim strongly suggested that it won't be.

WWE has released a number of women over the past few months, and any of them could potentially be the challenger. Impact is probably counting on fans to jump to that conclusion. By not naming the challenger, Impact encourages fans to infer that she's currently under a WWE non-compete clause that won't expire until right before the show. Of course, none of us can be certain about those non-compete clauses, or which wrestlers have negotiated to waive them. We also can't be assured that the mystery opponent must be a WWE name; it could easily just be someone like ODB coming in for a cup of coffee.

Matches like this tend to be trouble for long-running champions. The most famous example would be when the Ultimate Warrior shocked the Honky Tonk Man in 1989. It won't help Purrazzo that she's cut ties with her cronies, Kimber Lee and Susan, so she won't have them ready to interfere if she gets in trouble. However, Purrazzo is already booked to defend the title in a champion vs. champion match on August 14, so it's hard to believe she'll drop the belt ahead of that.

Four-way tag team match - This is for the Impact men's tag team title, currently held by Violent By Design. Typically in a match like this, members of two teams start in the ring, while everyone else stands in their assigned corner. The legal wrestlers in the ring can tag in anyone in any corner, whether it's their own partner or an opponent. The first wrestler to score a fall on any opponent wins the match and the championship for his team.

The championship is currently held by Violent By Design: Rhino, Joe Doering, Deaner, and Eric Young. In the tradition of the "Freebird Rule," you get booked to wrestle the team, not any specific individuals, so then the team gets to choose which members will actually be in the match. Young has been sidelined with a knee injury so I'm pretty sure VBD's options are limited to Rhino, Doering, and Deaner. But they could always bring in a new member.

There will be three other teams in the match, but only two have been confirmed: Rich Swann & Willie Mack and Doc Gallows & Karl Anderson. When the match was first announced, the team of TJP & Fallah Baah was supposed to be in it. However, we found out yesterday that TJP is unable to do the match for some reason. Impact said the match will still involve four teams, but didn't say that Baah will get another partner. So it's possible Baah has also been pulled from the match, and both guys in the fourth team could be a surprise.

The build for this match felt like a clusterfuck. VBD and Gallows/Anderson are the top teams, but they're all heels, so some babyface teams had to get thrown together, and then all of it is dumped into one match until an actual story direction emerges. The only cool outcome I see is if Fallah Baah really does step aside and a whole new team debuts. But they could just as easily stick Johnny Swinger and Hernandez in there, so I shouldn't get my hopes up. The safe bet is the champs retain.

Moose vs. Chris Sabin - Moose has been a top heel for a while, but he kind of went babyface a little in his program with Kenny Omega. With that out of the way, he threw a tantrum about losing to Omega to remind us he's still a heel, until Sabin chased him off. Without Alex Shelley or James Storm to team with, Sabin hasn't had much to do, so now he's in a match that could re-establish him as a singles guy.

I assume the winner of this match get into the hunt for the world title, perhaps at whatever big show they do in August. That sort of favors Sabin, although I can't totally count out Moose. Moose feels like he's headed for bigger things in Impact, and a convincing win over a former Impact world champion here would get him off to a good start. I guess I've talked myself into picking Moose to win.

Eddie Edwards vs. W. Morrissey - Morrissey (formerly Big Cass in WWE) is on a roll as the latest Mean Guy to beat everybody up in Impact. Edwards, a former world champion in Impact and ROH, is his toughest competition since he got here. I don't see Edwards winning unless they have big plans for him. And I suppose they might have big plans for Eddie, but big plans are clearly in progress for Morrissey. I'm certain this is just a glorified squash match to put Morrissey over.

Matt Cardona & ? vs. Tenille Dashwood & Brian Myers - Cardona and Myers were the team of Zack Ryder & Curt Hawkins in WWE, but they've been feuding since they got to Impact. I'd actually forgotten that Dashwood and Cardona were dating about five or six years ago, which would maybe explain why she helped Myers beat down Cardona recently. So now we've got this mixed tag team match. Cardona has to find a woman to be his partner, but we don't know who it will be.

The minute they announced this match, they started teasing the mystery woman would be Cardona's fiancée, Chelsea Green. I suspect that tease was taped before Green showed up at the ROH pay-per-view saying she wasn't medically cleared in Maryland and that she would wrestle for ROH this summer. Of course, none of that necessarily means she can't wrestle for Impact with a wrist injury in Tennessee. But I think the tease is a deliberate misdirection. Dashwood has been trying to drive a wedge between Rachael Ellering and Jordynne Grace, so either of them might make sense in this spot.

If the mystery partner is any good, I think she has to get the win here. But even if Impact has picked up some hot free agents, I don't expect many of them to actually wrestle on this show. So it could be a deal where they reveal Green is in the company, Green swerves us by introducing (for example) Alisha Edwards as the partner, and the babyfaces just lose.

Kiera Hogan & Tasha Steelz vs. Rosemary & Havok - This is booked for the pre-show. Fire 'N' Flava (Hogan & Steelz) are defending the Impact women's tag team championship. As I recall, Rosemary and Taya Valkyrie feuded with Havok and Neveah a few months back over some spooky shit involving Rosemary and Havok. Anyway, Valkyrie and Neveah left the company, so I guess the spooky sides of those teams have put aside their differences. You could do some fun things with Rosemary and Havok as champs, but I don't know why you'd book the title change on a pre-show. So I think Hogan and Steelz retain, and this storyline will continue for a while longer.

[prettyboongi]

Just Spill It

Reader x Kim Taehyung 

2k+ words

Genre: Crack, Fluff

[Note: I’ve been written fic lately because of school and everything. I actually had to work on a huge paper all week and was waiting until I got everything out of the way to write this. And boy, this request was such a doozy lol. The game that everyone plays in the story is that “Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts” game on James Corden late night show. And I have to be honest: I’m not a huge fan of talk shows or even Corden’s show for that matter. So I had to watch a bunch of videos the shows clips on YouTube just to understand the game. So yeah, this request was super challenging and I hope I got everything right ^-^}

You were putting the finishing touches on the chocolate cupcakes you’ve spent the past couple of hours baking when you heard the doorbell rang. “Must be them,” you thought to yourself. Checking the time, you saw that it was a little bit past seven in the evening. “A little late but, with them, what’s new? ”. You gave your sticky hands a quick rinse and headed towards the door. 

Tonight was a very sacred night for you and the boys: the coveted Game Night. Always organized by you and thrown at your place, Game Night for you guys were legendary. Starting off with a harmless game, again of your choosing, the night would always end with someone throwing a temper tantrum, crying dramatically, yelling match between two or more of the boys or someone having to act out a degrading yet hilarious penalty for losing. Sure it was complete chaos but it was also tons of fun. There was never a dull moment with these nerds and you really cherished the time you had with them. With recording sessions, promoting albums and projects in between, it was very hard to find time to hang out. While you understand their obligations to BTS, it still makes you feel lonely most of the time. That’s why Game Night was super important to you and, knowing how important it was for you, the boys always left the planning to you. 

You opened the door to an assortment of greetings, one more zany than the last. “Hey guys,” you welcomed, “come on in”. As the boys spilled in, you had to remind them about being a little less rowdy, the last Game Night being interrupted by your neighbors filing a noise complaint. “I’d rather not have the cops being called to my place again.”

“Well we wouldn’t have had the police called on us if Jin hyung didn't have that huge freak out,” Jungkook says teasingly. 

“Well,” Jin responds with a fake smile, trying to hide his annoyance, “I wouldn’t have freaked out if Yoongi here wasn’t cheating!” He gestures to a totally unbothered Yoongi already relaxing on the sofa. 

Stifling your laughter, you walked over to the kitchen to check on sweets you were finishing up. There you found Taehyung chowing down on the cupcakes. Seeing that he already had eaten three of the dozen you’ve made, you derided him, “Tae! Stop being a pig and save the rest for the others.” 

He swallowed a mouth full of cupcake and smiled cheekily. “Come on, Y/N, you know that these are my favorite. You obviously made them for me.” He pointed to the thin strawberry slices you placed on top. 

You opened your mouth in protest but stopped immediately. Yes, you knew chocolate cupcakes were his favorite. Especially with strawberries. And yes you made them with him in mind. But no way were you going to give him the satisfaction. 

He eyes you impishly, as if he won this conversation. You took the cupcake tray from his reach and said to him sternly, “just wait until everyone had at least one, then you can eat the leftovers. Deal?”

“Deal” 

Walking over to the living room area with Taehyung trailing behind you, you placed the tray of cupcakes next to the fried chicken Namjoon had brought over. You saw that everyone was helping themselves to heaping amounts of the crispy, savory chicken. “Please try not to fill up too much food tonight,” you warned them, “you guys will need to leave some room for what we’re playing tonight.” 

“Oh, what do you have planned for us tonight?”, asked Namjoon before taking a huge bite of his food.

Before you could answer, Hoseok interjects, “Oooh! Let me guess. Striped poker?” 

“No Hoseok,” you flatly answered, shutting him down. 

“Strip Monopoly?” Jimin adds. 

“No guys, no one is taking their clothes off. Especially not after that one Game Night,” you said rather dimly. The boys shuddered as they remembered that ill-fated night, a story left for another time. “But yeah, I got this idea from a night talk show that I found myself watching one night. The host was playing this game with their guest where they had both get to ask each other some pretty invasive questions. But if either of them chooses not to answer the question they were given, they had to eat or drink something gross that the other person picked out for them. I thought it was pretty funny and we could all try it.”  Despite being excited yourself, you couldn’t help but notice an array of mixed emotions. 

“I dunno, Y/N, it sounds kinda...sketchy”, Namjoon says. 

“I mean yeah, but that’s kinda the point. Come on, you have to admit it's pretty interesting.”

“To be perfect honest, this game sounds fucking awful,” Yoongi opens, “but hey, what the hell. Let's how it goes.” 

You ushered the guys to the balcony, where it was decorated with glowing string lights and a new set of furniture bought for this occasion. You presented the boys to a medium size table, topped with what was assumed plates covered with linen napkins. 

“Here’s what we’re dealing with tonight, gentlemen,” you announced rather theatrically. One by one, you lifted up each napkin, revealing a collection of foods you knew that would churn some stomachs: fried octopus, super spicy cinnamon candies, 100% cacao chocolate, mint creme Oreos, a spinach milkshake, ambrosia salad and a fluffernutter sandwich. The boys examined each dish, some already nauseated by the sight of certain dishes. “I didn’t want to go too far like the show did,” you explained, “just took some ideas from friends back home and food I know some of you already hate.” 

“Are there any winners in this game?,” Jimin asks cautiously

“No, there aren’t. Okay everyone have a seat!” After everyone had taken a seat, you went over how the game works again. “Oh, I forgot to add that you guys don’t have to necessarily finish the food. Under the table, there’s a few little trash bins you can spit into. But come on, I’m going easy on you guys, you shouldn’t need to spit anything out.” 

“You call a spinach milkshake ‘going easy’ on us?” Jungkook asks. 

“Don’t be a baby,” you gave Jungkook a mocking look while sitting yourself between Jin and Yoongi. “So here’s how we’re gonna take turns. We’ll start with me, then we’ll go clockwise ending with Yoongi. Is that good?” Murmurs of agreement answered your question. “Okay, for my turn I pick… Namjoon!” The sound of hearing his name startles him, causing his body to go rigid. “If you don’t answer my question, you’d have to eat the fried octopus. 

“Ha, bring it then” Namjoon says, trying to feign as much confidence that he can. 

“Alright,” you paused for a moment, “If you choose a Disney character to make out with, who would it be?” 

“Oh that’s easy. Undoubtedly, Miss Potts,” he says matter of factly. The table goes silent, weirded out by such a choice. 

“From Beauty and the Beast?”, you asked.

“Yeah.” 

“Why?” asks Hoseok. 

“Well, she’s a cool character. She has a warm personality and she seems like a great mom to Chip. Who wouldn’t pick her?” 

Somehow that leaves even more questions than answers any. “Okay…,” you respond, still a bit perturbed, “Jin’s turn.” 

Jin looks around the table to find his perfect target and finds it in none other than Jimin. “Jimin, I pick the mint Oreos for you if you don’t answer my question.” Jimin puts on a brave face but it’s obvious the anticipation is killing him inside. “There was one time during that afterparty a while ago when I saw you and Seulgi running off somewhere. You told me you two were just chatting but what were you two really up to?,” He asked with a mischievous smirk on his face. Ooooohs” echoed around the table as we waited for Jimin’s answer. With a stony smile plastered on his face, Jimin stares at Jin for a moment before reaching out for an Oreo. He takes a huge bite of the minty cookie while keeping his stare at Jin, ultimately gagging on it and having to spit out the whole thing. The whole table erupts in laughter as you said, “We’re off to a good start.” 

As the night went by, the game carried on without any issues. Among the highlights was Hoseok revealing his biggest (and not surprising) kink and watching Jungkook down an entire spinach milkshake. Seeing how much fun the gang were having, you couldn’t help but feel proud of yourself for pulling off yet another successful Game Night. The game was nearing its end when the last turn went to Yoongi. And since you were the only one that hasn’t been asked a question, it was obvious this one was going to be directed towards me. 

Yoongi turns to you, “The ambrosia salad for this simple question.” You nodded in agreement, not knowing what he meant by “simple”. “Are you in love with Taehyung?” 

All around, everyone pauses at Yoongi’s question. Especially you, whose mind goes blank for a moment before speaking up. “What? What’re you talking about? What kind of question is that?” You tried laughing it off. 

“A simple one,” he answers. “Are you in love Taehyung?” 

“Of course, I love him. He’s like my best friend-” 

“I mean, we all know that but are you IN love with him?” Namjoon interjects. 

You look around the entire table, leaning in to hear your answer. Your eyes eventually land on Taehyung sitting across from you. He’s clearly embarrassed yet interested in hearing your answer as well. You felt your face burning up as well as your heartbeat quickening from all of this unwanted attention.. You could’ve taken the easy way out and lied, you were sure of the guys were lying when answering their questions. But you couldn’t. One, for the integrity of Game Night and second, you would have to answer yes. For the longest time, you never wanted to admit to yourself but you were in love with Taehyung. Madly in love with him. You loved the banter the two of you developed over the years. You loved how he would annoy you and then make it up by being extremely adorable. You love how he was the only man that ever made you feel special. Without any doubt, you were in love with him. However, you weren’t about to reveal it in front of the boys while playing this dumb game. 

After much anticipation, you deeply sighed and ate a huge spoonful of the slightly warm ambrosia salad. You tried your best to swallow it but the conflicting  textures of creamy base and the coconut flakes was too much for you. Feeling that you were about to barf, you quickly got up and ran back into the apartment. You reached the bathroom (and thankfully the toilet) and regurgitated everything you tried to keep down. You felt some tears forming at the corner of your eyes, not sure if it was from throwing up or the sheer humiliation you’ve just experienced. “Don’t let this get to you, it’s just part of the game,” you told yourself. You wiped the tears from your eyes, rinsed your mouth with mouthwash and headed out of the bathroom. 

As you were walking back to the balcony, you bumped into Taehyung in the hallway. “Oh…,” was all you could muster to say. There was a brief awkward silence between you two, a rarity in your close relationship. Taehyung looks away as he scratches the back of his head while you kept your head down. “I should’ve known I was going to be hit with a question like that,” you finally opened, “ Yoongi never plays around, doesn't he?.”

“Yeah,” Taehyung responds, “except for when he’s cheating.” 

You both look at each other for a moment before breaking into a light laughter, easing the tension. Once you were done giggling, you caught Taehyung staring at you with his gorgeous, sharp eyes. The look in his eyes were filled with sincere and the kind of intimacy only two best friends shared. Or maybe there was something more to that look. 

"Tae-," you started but stopped when Taehyung put his hand up to your cheek, gently caressing it with his thumb. 

"You don't have to say anything, Y/N" he says to you. 

Earlier when Jimin asked if there were any winners in the game, it turned out there were two that night. 

[caps-lockdown]

Poll Winner...Hotel Horrors!

Hotel Horrors

Hey everyone so so sorry that this took forever and a day to get out. The short version is I quit my new job because it was leading me down a dark path of anxiety and depression so I’ve been struggling with all of that nonsense and quite frankly lost the motivation to write anything at all. I want everyone to know that your mental health matters and no job (no matter the money or benefits) is worth putting that at risk.

Anyway, here’s the winner of my 200 follower poll! I do plan on writing the other choices eventually, but again I’ve been struggling HARD with writer’s block.

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader

Words: 5,586

Warnings: Mentions of booze, a few swear words. A crude joke. Pretty much all fluff with some panicked!Steve and switching of names.

Summary: Steve Rogers lost something extremely important at your hotel during an undercover mission. What will you do when you find out your celebrity crush was staying under your roof?!

It’s in Y/N Y/L/N format, and I own no characters save for the reader and her coworkers/family. No beta, so mistakes are mine, ALL MINE I tell you!

ENJOY!

“Y/N my happy little orange blossom!”

You looked up from your mug, hot tea sloshing in your mouth until you could force it down. It was eight-thirty am on a brisk Monday in New York City, the hustle and bustle of morning traffic mixed with the grogginess of another too short weekend over. The hotel lobby had been quiet a whole half hour before your uncle had made his presence known. The Wilson hotel, named after your grandfather’s first dog had been in your family for just shy of sixty years, your father and uncle taking over when your grandfather decided to retire five years ago. It was a quaint but lovely little building, boasting just fifty six rooms and four luxury suites. Your grandfather had bought the building on a splurge, wanting to create his own income and become his own boss, much to the encouragement of your grandmother. It was an instant success, the small homely atmosphere mixed with the most affordable prices in the city kept you busy as a receptionist.

Things had slowed down just a touch now that the new year was here and the holidays were gone, people not traveling as much to make up for the money they had spent on presents for whatever they were celebrating. You were usually never caught dead at work on Mondays, never one to really enjoy the swarms of grumpy travelers in the early hours. Sundays and Mondays, until this week unfortunately, were your prized days off. That all changed the minute Mandy the other receptionist who usually worked days where you worked nights decided to bring her third hell spawn into the world a week early. A New Year’s baby. How lovely. Now because of the aptly named “Kia”, you were forced to pull double duty until her replacement started next week. So much for your Christmas wish of working less. You took it in stride though, after all Mandy was your soon to be cousin, your cousin Brent popping the question Christmas morning surrounded by all of your family. The very same family who was quick to point out that you were now the last of six children to be engaged. Or the last of six to have children. Or the last of six to be in a remotely serious relationship. And no, your crush on Captain America most certainly did not count. The only one who hadn’t spoken a word against you was Uncle Todd. He had always been your favorite, and you his. He never married, nor had kids of his own, so he was always quick to jump down your family’s throats. After all, he owned sixty percent of the Wilson and he turned out just fine thank you very much.

His only downfall was that he was simply too happy in the mornings.

His deep chuckle brought you back to the present, an annoyed expression passing over you as he lovingly patted you on the top of your head. He’d been doing it since you were a child. You had hated it since you were a child too. “Oh come now Y/N, surely you aren’t that hung over from the New Year’s celebration? It was a week ago after all. Put some spring in your step!”

“First of all, it’s too early for you. Now I know why I don’t work mornings.” You muttered the last bit into your oversized mug before draining the rest of your English breakfast tea. “Secondly,” you cleared your throat, picking up your electric kettle that sat at your desk and started on brewing your second cup, “You know damn well I don’t get hangovers Uncle. Fortunately I have your alcohol tolerance instead of my hopeless father’s.” The tea bag fell into your now full mug with an uninterested plop. “And thirdly, I’m only here because Mandy is out and Rachel doesn’t start for another week. Last I checked you don’t pay me enough to care about “peppiness” this early on a Monday.”

The shaking of his head normally would have you fearing for a spiel about being more carefree and positive, but the grin he was sporting brought a small one to your features. “We’ll make a morning person out of you yet Y/N. Carson here yet?”

“Nope, I’d wager dad’s stuck in traffic,” you pulled a face before adding “Again”.

“I swear that man will be late to his own funeral. I expect we’ll get a phone call any moment now, be sure to rip him a new one for me eh? Oh my new year’s resolution is to leave the house earlier so I can be on time my left foot.” You giggled, stirring honey into your beverage as he continued to rant and rave all the way to his office, the loud creak of his large chair announcing his defeat on the subject of your father’s constantly late arrivals.

As if on cue the main lobby’s terribly outdated phone rang loudly, a surprised yelp leaving your lips as you set the cup down and picked up the receiver.

“Good morning and thank you for calling the Wilson,” Your customer service voice was a common shock to your family and friends, the usual snark and sarcasm replaced with a sweet and patient tone. You quickly added, “Dad if this is you calling to say you’re running late, it’s been like this for five years. You don’t need to give us a heads up. We know you’ll show up, but you should know uncle Todd prefers it be before the next turn of the century.”

“Well Mandy your uncle seems like a reasonable man although I can assure you I’m extremely punctual.” The voice was certainly not your father’s, and for second you were extremely embarrassed and looking for quick way to end it. It wasn’t normal to get phone calls this early. But before you could do anything rash the person on the other line let out a short laugh. “I needed that laugh today, thank you. It’s been a stressful morning.”

“I’m sorry about that! I’m afraid Mandy is out, my name is Y/N.”Your face burned with the intensity of the sun as you quickly moved on, “How can I help you today mister….”

“Rogers. I’m sorry I assumed you were Mandy.”

“It’s alright mister Rogers.”

“Great.” He continued, taking a breath “Mandy alright?”

“Yep the baby just came early and she went into labor during our charity event last week.”

“How beautiful. I recall her saying something about contractions now that you mention it. Listen Y/N I was wondering if you could help me out on something urgent?”

“Sure mister Rogers, anything for my favorite neighbor.” You blurted out and then inwardly cringed at your own terrible joke, but again it was met by the stranger’s rough laughter. It almost sounded familiar. Like maybe you had heard it in person. Or on the television.

“Cute. I’m sure he…I mean I’ve never heard that one before.” The man recovered and you raised an eyebrow although he couldn’t see it. “So the long story short is that a friend and I checked in last week for your New Year’s charity Gala. It was stunning, had a wonderful time.”

“We had Pepper Potts as a consultant for the event, she’s incredible with event planning. Tony Stark donated some of the art work we auctioned off that night if you recall. Many were saddened to hear he wasn’t able to attend, but miss Potts looked lovely and did a great job.”

“That she did, and I’m sure he was there…in spirit I suppose.” The man got out hastily before recomposing himself. “Anyway I’m afraid my colleague and I were so partied out when we checked out the next day I realized I forgot a very important flash drive somewhere in my suite.”

“Not a problem mister Rogers, our suites are extremely private and we haven’t had any guests in them since last week so I have no problem calling housekeeping and seeing if they found anything. Just a thumb drive you said?”

“Yes a small black thumb drive. I’m super boring and predictable. And please, call me Tony.”

“Alright mister-“You stopped yourself, “Tony. What suite were you in? And we can check your friend’s suite too if you want to give me his name.”

“Oh of course suite number two. He was staying under the name Steve Stark.”

You held in a laugh. It was normal for high-caliber people and celebrities to check in under false names, sometimes even using the names of other celebrities. Kim Kardashian-West checked in as Princess Jasmine once somewhere.

“And you’re Tony Rogers. Funny, I’m sure Mandy didn’t catch that one. She isn’t the brightest crayon in the box I’m afraid.”

“I can agree with you there. “ The man laughed again, and you realized you were finding yourself in a good mood talking to this man. Why was that?

“Well I’ll do some digging and see what I can find. Is this a good number to reach you at Tony?”

“Yes this number is the right one to snag me at.”

“Perfect, I’ll get housekeeping on it right away as no one has been in there since your stay. I’ll call you in a couple days with our results. Hopefully we find it for you. Have a great day!”

“You too Y/N, talk to you soon.”

You hung up the phone and promptly dropped your head on the desk. Where did you know that  voice from?

~~Earlier at the Tower~~

“For the last time Steve I haven’t seen your thumb drive!” Sam waved Steve away from blocking the game on the television in the common area. “Now you make a better mountain sized door instead of a window.” Steve huffed angrily out of the room.

“Haven’t seen it Cap, might I suggest checking your shoes?” Tony got out in between bites of his cereal, Bucky laughing with him at the Captain’s deadpanned expression. “What? Worth a shot.”

He stomped out of that room too.

Even Nat had jumped on the skeptical side, narrowing her eyes as he dug through his luggage again for the seventh time in the past two days, “Are you sure you didn’t pack it?”

This was it. This was how Steve Rogers was going to lose his mind. The sleep deprived and stress-ridden super solider pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to take deep breaths. It proved fruitless and he smashed his phone into the wall a day later at the suggestion from Tony to just call the Wilson. The same hotel Tony and him had stayed at the previous week for an undercover mission.

The team had accepted the circumstances, Strange and Nat running communications while Tony and Steve underwent massive amounts of makeup to change their appearance. Tony of course went the craziest. Bald cap, clean shaved face and a suit that made him look even more buff than he already was. Nat kept calling him “Daddy Warbucks”. Steve however had kept it simple. Changed his hair color, grew his beard out a little longer, contacts, and wore a slightly ill fitting suit.

Truth be told he didn’t understand why they needed to be there at first. “Catching art thieves” wasn’t something that usually required action from The Avengers. NYPD were more than capable most of the time, so it came as a shock when one of the owners of the Wilson reached out to them via email. The message didn’t say too much, other than a time, date, and small description of the group of men needing apprehended. Todd and his partner didn’t want these men getting to the very expensive masterpieces they were auctioning off for charity, and just wanted some extra security. Apparently the thieves had been snatching works of art for nearly a decade and hadn’t been caught. Tony loved a challenge and accepted. Todd suggested setting a trap and sending a couple of them undercover so as to not draw unwanted attention. As an added bonus Tony donated some of the art to be auctioned off at the Gala held in his hotel on New Year’s Eve. He even offered to put them up in two of their nicer suites for no charge.  

Tony was in the minute he mentioned undercover. He even took to making some secret compartments in their attire, you know just in case.

“You too Y/N, talk to you soon.”

Speaking of the billionaire, he was now putting his phone back in his pocket, a smug expression on his face.

“Y/N the receptionist said she’d look into it and call back in a couple days. Now will you calm down?”

“I can’t calm down Tony, that thumb drive had all the evidence to put the art thieves away.”

“Wet Bandits” Tony corrected, Steve rolling his eyes. “The trial isn’t for another week and worrying is only going to force you into an earlier grave. So cool it.”

The blonde man ran a hand through his hair. He truly hated it when his friend was right. Though he’d never tell him of course, his ego was big enough as is. He let out a sigh, “Fine.”

“Great. Now make a list of places you were in the hotel during the Gala, we can go retrace your steps if they don’t find anything. I think your ancient brain is finally catching up to you Cap.”

Steve slammed the door to his room with that remark, seething with embarrassment and anger. It’s not like he had meant to lose it. He’d never lost intel like this before. Actually now that he thought about it he couldn’t think of a time he had ever lost something this important. Falling into his desk chair with an ungraceful thud, he began writing the places he had been during New Year’s Eve.

~~Flashback, Night of the Gala~~

“We’ll get right back to the Auction after the ball drops!” A jolly looking man, who the team learned to be Todd interrupted the evening, encouraging everyone to mingle and enjoy themselves. Tony didn’t need to be told a second time, making his way to the open bar while Strange noted his obvious distaste in their ear pieces.

People nearly trampled Steve as he got up from his seat, emptying out of the large conference room and into the beautifully decorated grand ballroom just outside. He couldn’t say he blamed anyone, being squished like sardines for the last two hours was starting to even get on his nerves. And he lived in a compound of superheroes with no real sense of boundaries. He was enjoying his solitude, no one recognizing him for the first time in years. It felt liberating, only having a select few know his true identity. He almost didn’t miss it.

He felt a slight shove into his shoulder, turning his body to glance down at the elegant figure draped in simple green velvet, your wide eyes burning into his in embarrassment.

“I’m…I’m such a klutz my apologies!” You stuttered out, giving him the smallest hint of a shy smile.

“No harm no foul. Tony.” He stuck out a hand, giving himself points for not messing up his alias.

You placed your small hand in his and immediately Steve was struck by how soft your hand felt.  But before you could give your name your heads swiveled at the shouting coming from the far side of the room. He noted how your eyes shown slight disappointment as you broke from the greeting.

“Forgive me. My relatives and booze never makes for a good outcome.” With a defeated sigh you turned on your heel, clicking away towards Todd, muttering to yourself. “Way to go Y/L/N, always running into gorgeous people and then running away.”

Ok, he missed it a little. You were the sort of someone he would have liked to ask to dance. If under different circumstances of course. Maybe. But silver lining, at least he had been able to catch your last name. He watched you run off with a dreamy look on his face.  

“Heads up lover boy, we got company.” Nat jolted Steve from his thoughts, four men entering the large room and nonchalantly casing the place. How these men had gotten away with stealing art for close to a decade was beyond him. Hiding within plain sight he moved to a vantage point high up on a stairwell.

“Tony you got them?”

“You mean Steve. I’m Steve, you’re Tony. Geesh that dime wasn’t in your orbit for more than two minutes and you’re this scrambled?” Tony teased, Steve groaning into his ear piece and earning a smirk in response. “Yea I got them, shall I go ahead and set the plan in motion?” He caught Steve’s nod and reaffirmed it with his own, making his way towards the group. “Then the game is afoot!”

Steve made a mental note to ask Thor for some meade after all of this was over.

The rest of the night went easy enough. The “Wet Bandits” fell for the trap, they were caught red handed and arrested on the spot. Steve managed to swipe a USB drive from the ring leader of the group before the police carted off the criminals, the crowd clapping and cheering for them. They looked like normal, non-super people, just doing the right thing at the right time. It gave the team a sense of pride, knowing even without their suits or names they still got the job done.

“Where should I put this?” He fiddled with the small storage device. Nat had mentioned it would most likely have very incriminating evidence on it. She also put extra emphasis on keeping it safe.

“I don’t know, somewhere close to your soul?”

“That makes no sense Tony.”Steve muttered from the punch bowl, watching his partner walk towards him, empty glass in tow. Typical.

Tony joined him while everyone began to count down the minutes til the new year, gloating about how he couldn’t wait to kiss Pepper.

“That’s rich considering you look like mister clean right now. Think of the headlines.” Strange muttered into the comms and Tony laughed, forgetting temporarily what he looked like in his present state. “Hey there’s that girl you were making eyes at Rogers.”

The contacts he wore were starting to itch from dryness, and Steve found himself exceptionally happy that the night would soon be ending. He couldn’t help but gravitate toward you, your smile and light laughter ringing over the small group of people around you.

“Hello again.” Steve tried to think of what Tony would do in this situation, and then decided the cocky approach probably wouldn’t go over well. Your eyes twinkled in the glow of the gentle lighting, the room dimming as it got closer to a new year.

“Hi again.” Sixty seconds to go.

“I didn’t get to tell you earlier but you look stunning.” You were happy your blush was hidden in the near darkness of the room. The people were getting louder in their chanting of the time, Steve swallowing hard as your smile grew wider with the passing second. As so did his confidence.

“Thank you, that suit is an…interesting color.” Steve remembered his current attire and internally grimaced. What a claude you must think him, showing up in an ill fitting suit, beard barely groomed, his slightly red eyes. Of course he gets the gumption to make small talk and introduce himself and what happens? He looks like a homeless vacuum salesman.

“Ten…Nine…Eight…” He watched as you looked around the room, loudly calling out the numbers, unaware of how smitten he must have been looking at you. You seemed so genuine in your happiness, your smile beaming and lighting up the whole room.

“Five….Four..” He had no idea what was making him inch closer to you, but he couldn’t stop himself. It was like he needed to be near that sort of energy. He hadn’t met anyone that put him so much at ease so quickly before. Why was that?

“HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!” The crowd erupted in cheers and shouts, guests pulling on party popper strings and Todd and Carson popping bottles of champagne open with sabers. He laughed at you while you shook your head at your obvious relatives. Of course it had to be sabers. Perhaps it was the atmosphere. Maybe it was the loud music. He blamed a large portion of it on the alcohol, although it did nothing for him. Whatever it was spread throughout his entire nervous system and pushed him to place a small kiss on your blush tapped cheek.

“Happy New Year.” He managed to get out, taken aback by his own actions. You didn’t seem to mind, only beamed a smile that seemingly blinded him. Which wasn’t difficult to accomplish thanks to the stupid contacts.

“Yappy Hew Near.” Your alarmed expression at your jumbled words caused Steve to let out a deep laugh, you joining in shortly after. The night concluded with the art being bought back by Tony, not truly wanting to see them go in the first place. He could already hear the argument he and Pepper would be having later. If the look she gave him was any indication, he fully expected Stark to be in sofa city for the better part of the new year. He headed back to his suite with a bounce in his step, happy with the overall outcome.

Steve’s happiness was gone the minute they got back to the Tower and he noticed the flash drive was nowhere in sight.

~~Present~~

Which lead him to this moment of staring at Sam while he went over his paper. There weren’t that many places on it which made for a short list. The lobby, ballroom, conference room, and of course his suite were the only places he went after swiping the drive. Sam took note of all of the sighs leaving the tall man’s lips as he perused the list, growing slightly annoyed.

“Steve, man you gotta get laid. Or go fishing. Somethin’. Anything that will make you less mopey.” His friend grinned, it sinking into a frown when Steve gave him murderous side eye.

“Sam I appreciate you inserting yourself into my personal life again but I still haven’t found that drive. It means everything to the trial and without it –“

”The Wet Bandits won’t be convicted and you will have failed this city…yadda yadda…” Bucky finished, putting his hands on his hips as he stood alongside Sam. “Seriously pal, we know. But worrying about it ain’t gonna make it appear out of thin air. Stop making it worse.”

“Easy for you to say Buck,” Steve scoffed. “You weren’t the one that lost it.”

“Well Cap, I guarantee it will be in the last place you left it!” Tony said, smiling cheerfully at him while he snatched the list from Sam, nodding once he had finished going over it. “We’ll find it, stop getting your old man undies in a bunch and go do something productive.”

Steve went running for three hours, the entire time thinking of ways to get away with murder.

~~~Meanwhile at the Wilson~~~

“I’m telling you Uncle I have torn these rooms apart and I haven’t found anything!!!”

You were laying on the floor of the suite Tony Rogers, or whatever his real name was had stayed in the week prior, your uncle staring down at you from the doorway that lead out into the hall.

“I can see that.” You uncle stated matter of fact, astonished at the sight. “Orange blossom it’s been two days and you haven’t found anything, I think you should give the nice man a call.”

“Ughmnpf” Was your response, your voice muffled from your face in the carpet. Housecleaning hadn’t found anything when they had cleaned both rooms, and you had spent the better part of forty eight hours digging through everything. Todd had rounded up a crew to search the rooms the Gala had been at just in case, and had turned up nothing. Well they did find your uncle’s most prized bottle opener that was shaped like a large great white shark he had gotten from the Caribbean three years ago, but that wasn’t doing anyone any favors. “He’s gonna be so upset Todd. I don’t know if I can to talk to him again.” You complained weakly, rolling onto your back to stare at the ceiling.

“Nonsense, if I remember him well enough I know he’d be very impressed with how you managed to tear these rooms apart looking for something he lost in the first place. Give yourself more credit.”

You dragged yourself off the plush floor and made your way to the phone located in the room, taking out a small slip of paper out from the pocket of your dark gray slacks and punching it into the phone. It rang four times before you were sent to voicemail.

“Hey you’ve reached the personal voicemail of Tony Stark, obviously I’m too wrapped up right now to take your call, so leave a message and I’ll call back when I feel like it.”

You stared into the phone in shock, the loud tone making you jump and sputter into the receiver.

“Ssss…sorry to call this number, I was told I could reach Tony Rogers here. This is Y/N from the Wilson, if you’re free to stop by at three this afternoon I’d greatly appreciate it. Thh..thank you.” You hung up the phone. Now you were certain you had been played. What was this mystery man playing at? First he gives you an obviously fake name and then gives you the phone number of THE Tony Stark?

“What’s wrong Y/N? You look like you just discovered spit in your cheerios. Which might I add hasn’t happened in years.”

“Um, who stayed in this suite Uncle? Tell me the truth.” You narrowed your eyes, attempting to look menacing in your bright mustard sweater and messy bun.

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you, but it sounds like you’ll meet him soon enough. Which lucky for me, I’ll be here to record it.” Your face paled as your heart started to race.

Who the hell was coming to the hotel?!

~~~Three p.m~~~

“I don’t know about this Tony,” Steve muttered into his new phone, trudging up the slightly slick steps of the hotel. It was snowing, wet globs falling from the sky and sticking to the warm pavement creating a walking hazard for most people. He wasn’t most people though. “You called her. You should be here.”

“And you lost the drive, so you have retrieve it. Now get that stick out of your ass and maybe after ask her out afterwards. ” Steve rolled his eyes, the sass evident in the brunette’s tone. Everyone had gotten fed up with him over the last few days, although he was certain that was a massive understatement. “Let me know how it goes, I’ve got a meeting so I’ll talk to you afterwards.” Steve ended the call with a firm click, taking extra care at putting his phone into his pocket upon entering the lobby. Would hate to have to purchase a second phone within a week.

He was delighted to see you behind the counter, recognizing you from the gala. Granted your eyes were as big as dinner plates and you were choking on whatever was in your mug but you still managed to look lovely. He had it bad and he didn’t have the faintest idea why or how. But he did know that your smile had plagued his nights and swept through his days the entire time he had been looking for this drive. He would definitely be asking you out today.

“Hello I’m looking for Y/N?” Steve said politely, knowing good and well he was staring at her. He noticed Todd off to the side, clearly recording the whole ordeal on his phone. He had mentioned at the Gala that Y/N had harbored an intense school girl crush on the captain most of her life, and had been slightly looking forward to meeting him. Granted this was technically the third time they had met, but she didn’t know that yet.

“She’s right here!” Todd said brightly, your brain attempting to pick itself off the floor and reinsert itself back into your skull. You shook your head out of your shock and smiled, trying hard to calm your nerves. You could probably beat a hummingbird with how fast your heart was racing.

“He’s right I’m Y/N. You must be mister Rogers.” You mentally smacked yourself. Of course he was. His small grin at your expense made the humiliation twenty times worse.

“That I am. Any luck finding my drive?” He was trying to be direct. Right. He had no business here otherwise. You lowered your head, both out of disappointment and guilt.

“I’m afraid not. I personally searched both suites myself for hours and couldn’t find a single black flash drive. I’m so sorry but I was hoping maybe if you revisited the room that it would jog your memory?”

“Good luck with that,” Todd chimed in, your gaze ripping from Steve’s blue eyes to look at your uncle sharply, “It looks like a bomb went off up there.”

“I think it’s a decent idea, sure.” Steve admonished, finding himself at wits end over the matter.

You nodded and lead the way to the elevators, your uncle electing to stay behind much to your behest. Perhaps you would have a heart attack on the way up and that would be the end of it. No, that was being too optimistic. You took the space closest to the far wall, keeping your distance and blush ridden skin as far away from the super solider as possible.

“Ya know this isn’t the first time we’ve met.” Steve said simply, giving you a heartbreaking smile. “You quite literally bumped into me during the gala. And I was with you during the countdown later on that night.”

“I surely would have remembered running into you mister Rogers.” You retorted back just as simply, attempting to study the buttons on the elevator in great detail.

“Not if I was undercover. I had a long beard, terribly fitting suit. Black hair. I’m afraid the contacts made my eyes a little red from the dryness. You were looking absolutely breathtaking, wearing a beautiful green velvet dress. I’ll admit I was pulled to you from the very first moment I laid eyes on you. What were your exact words at midnight?” Your breath caught in your throat when you met his eyes, the recognition hitting you like a freight truck.

“Yappy Hew Near.” You both said it in union, your face going from tinted pink to full on tomato red when you realized Captain America had kissed you on the cheek that night.

“I am SUCH an idiot I am so sorry!” You stammered out, hoping for the first time in your life that the elevator would NOT break down with you stuck in it with Steve Rogers.

“Hey doll it’s alright, really. I wouldn’t have done what I did if I didn’t want to. Your smile is something else.” That caused you to blush harder, if that was possible. “Now let’s go see about that suite huh?”

You really hated how cool he was about the whole thing.

Deciding it would be in your best interest to get this over with as soon as possible you practically tore  down the suite door, the inside looking like a tornado went through it. After a band of criminals ransacked it. You tensed up when you heard Steve let out a slow and low whistle.

“You’ve uh…you’ve been busy.” He tried, not easing your nerves and surveying the area. “I believe you when you say you didn’t find anything.”

A nervous chuckle escaped you, “Can you walk me through what happened when you got back here? It might help talking through it.” Steve nodded at you although he wasn’t looking in your direction, his tall stature breezing around the large room with ease.

“I went to the bathroom after taking off my jacket,” He looked in the closet. Nothing. “I took out the awful contacts and shaved.” You giggled as he mimed running a razor over his face in the bathroom. He placed the invisible facial tool down on the counter and walked back out, looking slightly behind you at the nightstand. “I placed my watch there and went to take off my sh…”

The sentence died in his throat, you becoming slightly concerned as he proceeded to stand ramrod still. “Steve? Did you remember something?”

He took off his right shoe, staring into it with a slack jaw.

“You’ve got to be shitting me.”

“Steve? You’re making me nervous, talking into your shoe and all.” You had begun to back away when a slightly hysterical laugh escaped the man’s throat, the timber wavering as he ripped the insole out of the piece of footwear. You were starting to rethink being alone in a hotel room with him.

It was only when he took out the small thumb drive from a hidden compartment in his sole that you began laughing too. But yours was partially due to extreme anger.

“It…was in…your…shoe….the WHOLE time…?” You managed to get out, heaving breaths and attempting to catch them while the good Captain continued to lean onto the nightstand for support, his own breath ragged.

“Tony….made a joke…about putting it…close to…my soul.” He stood up straight, slowly regaining composure which you were not finding helpful. “I must have been so tired that I thought putting it in there was a good idea.”

“Well clearly it was a good place, you couldn’t even find it. But who uses a shoe? Honestly.”

Steve had the good sense to look embarrassed, running a hand through his hair and offering an apologetic smile. “I am so embarrassed. You tore this hotel apart looking for this and I had it the whole time. The team will never let me live it down once they find out.”

“Who says they have to know?” Came your reply, already heading to the suite door and pulling it open with a bit of effort. “I won’t tell anyone. It’ll be our secret.”

“What’s the catch doll?” He held the door for you and you gave a mumbled thanks.

“Drinks. Right now.” You said confidently, looking into his eyes, his real blue eyes with ease.

“Can’t I’m afraid.” Steve grinned at your sad expression. “We have dinner plans first.”

“Pizza?”

“You read my mind Y/N.”

You couldn’t stop yourself, beaming another mega-watt smile.

“Maybe we’re SOLE-mates mister Rogers. Shall we?”

You both laughed the entire way to the restaurant down the street.

The end.

Tags: @kaytizzle @pies-wands-and-more @cuffski @giggleberts 

[eleventoes]

as i told you | drabble

pairing: jungkook x reader | fluff (do i even write for any other genre at this point) word count: 1.5k warning(s): none synopsis: You and Jungkook are still idiots, except now you’re idiots in love. 

( a look into what happens after as i told you ) ***

The truth of the matter was this: the thought of strangling Jeon Jungkook with your bare hands still crosses your mind more than it should, and that’s not what a healthy, loving relationship looks like, at least not according to Wikihow.

The cheerleaders badger you all the time in the locker room after practice, bombarding you with questions about what the two of you get up to in the apartment (“Sooyoung, you can stop wriggling your eyebrows now,” you’d scowl.) and Taehyung isn’t any better, because he thinks the two of you have cute romantic dates at home, and he gets all dreamy when he talks about it.

Yes, okay, sometimes the two of you can be pretty darn cute, even if you say so yourself. Jungkook likes spoiling you every other week, so he trudges to that famous bakery on the far side of town just to get you those donuts you adore, even when he’s worn out from late night practices. And you hate seeing him tired every time practice gets a little too rough as well, so somehow weekly Sunday morning massages became a thing, even if it evolves into a mini-wrestling match more often than not.

But people around you seem to forget that the two of you share almost everything: an apartment, a bed, a toothbrush (when Jungkook accidentally flushed his down the toilet) and a relentless competitive streak.

“Is that my hoodie?” he squints one morning as he emerges from the bathroom, hair still damp from the shower and eyes still bleary with sleep.

You nod from where you’re perched on the kitchen stool, too preoccupied with the latest webtoon update to spare him more than one appreciative glance. It’s not your fault his clothes are so goddamn comfortable, plus they always smell like that body spray he’s obsessed with, and it makes you feel all homely and tingly inside.

Without looking, you can tell he’s squinting again, and he hovers a little before speaking, “I’m not saying it’s not cute, because it’s cute seeing you waddle around—”

“I don’t waddle,” you throw him your best faux glare.

“But it’s the fourth time this week,” Jungkook cries, a little too dramatically in your very objective opinion, “I’m literally running out of clean clothes to wear.”

“You don’t seem to have an issue wearing dirty ones,” you retort, not because you’re still being petty about him never doing laundry (okay so maybe that’s half the reason), but because it’s true, Jungkook recycles dirty clothes more than he actually recycles.

You should have known something’s up the moment Jungkook narrows his eyes at your smartass remark, because the next morning, you almost drop the milk seeing Jungkook wearing one of your looser t-shirts.

“What the fuck,” numbly, you choke out, because the shirt’s tearing at its seams, and is figure-hugging in a way it was never supposed to be.

Jungkook, that smug asshole whom you love and cherish, only smiles devilishly before slinging on his sports bag and announcing that he’s leaving for practice, leaving you stunned (and a blushing mess, but we don’t talk about that) in the kitchen.

You do end up dropping the milk.

But what ensues is this: the two of you have once again embroiled yourselves in another unspoken challenge. The goal? To wear as many of the other’s clothes until one admits defeat. The prize? Bragging rights, because the two of you are wired that way. Purpose of challenge? None, as usual.

For a week or two, the two of you were practically stars on the campus forums; there’s a whole thread filled with ridiculous pictures of the two of you wearing each other’s clothes. Jungkook showed up to lab wearing your baby pink coat (and almost ripping it), you show up at an art elective class donning his favourite Iron Man tee (the stains were thankfully non-permanent), and you’re pretty sure he was going to wear your cheerleading skirt as an arm band or something, but you’ve been guarding your uniform with your life to avoid that ever happening. Highlight of the entire challenge was when Jungkook wore one of your long flowy tulle skirts to class, because he’s a badass like that, and gave a whole speech about the toxicity of gender normativity when sneered at by one of the TAs.

Yeah, you were proud, but on the brink of tears when he confessed that he spilt coffee on it right after the speech.

The challenge quickly draws to a close when your closets are all mixed up and laundry gets confusing. It got so messed up that you thought you were looking at Jungkook’s wardrobe when you opened your own, and it ends up being a tie, because now the two of you were unknowingly sharing closets.

Not the goal of the challenge (if there ever was one), but then the two of you get all giddy and excited over shopping for a new wardrobe (so that you both can officially share the same closet, duh), and now there’s only one wardrobe between the both of you.

So yes, the both of you were pretty darn cute.

Until Christmas rolls around and Jungkook gets a polaroid camera from his brother, which shouldn’t sound like it’s anything significant at all, up till you walk into his bedroom unannounced one day and stumble upon him and a handful of photos. All of you.

“I swear it’s not creepy,” leaping out of his chair, Jungkook gets to his feet and holds up both hands defensively.

You don’t tell him that him being creepy hasn’t even crossed your mind, because really, you’re just embarrassed and ridiculously flustered by how soft he looked when he was arranging the photos, so you just nod speechlessly.

“I was just trying out the camera, and you fell asleep on me, and I thought you looked,” he looks down and whispers, sounding almost like he got caught with his hand in the cookie jar, “Cute.”

“After that it was just fun to play around with the angles and the lighting, and you’re a pretty good subject,” he continues, albeit a little more bashful that you’ve ever seen him, “I thought I could compile it all into an anniversary gift once I’m done.”

The first outcome is this: two really flustered people and a pretty intense make-out session. The second is as follows: you wanting to capture Jungkook and his beauty the same way he captures yours, you getting a polaroid camera of your own, and then the two of you obsessively taking pictures of each other.

Jungkook slumped upside-down on the couch gaming on his phone? Click.

You and your bedhead looking exceptionally murderous one fine morning? Click.

Jungkook almost exploding something in the microwave? Click.

Your friends have all caught onto this new challenge; some roll their eyes, some scoff affectionately, others scream and claim the both of you as their OTP.

Others, like Kim Namjoon, with a fondly exasperated look on his face, suggest that the both of you stop wasting expensive film like its nothing, and maybe start taking photos together instead. That seems to make perfect sense, and both you and Jungkook cannot wrap your minds around how neither of you have actually thought about the most obvious thing in the world.

(“That’s easy,” Namjoon replies, looking as if he’s nursing the beginnings of a migraine with how he’s pinching the bridge of his nose, “It’s because both of you are hard-headed idiots. And you are perfect for each other.”)

So the two of you get all giddy and excited once again at the home depot store next to campus, picking out a nice corkboard and some nice scrapbooking supplies for the kitchen.

The challenge didn’t have any winners (again), largely because the both of you forgot that it was a competition to begin with, and are now too busy filling the corkboard with cute couple polaroids that anyone would be jealous of (“We would out-couple every couple out there,” smirked Jungkook when he’d put the board up. You’d agreed.).

There’s this one the both of you took at the beach, and the smiles on your faces are wide, and there’s one where the both of you were trying to babysit Taehyung’s puppy and ended up taking a million selfies with the poor dog smushed between your faces. And there’s your favourite: a blurry photo of the both of you attempting a selfie with the camera for the first time, except none of you had figured out how it worked just yet and it ended up being a blurry photo of Jungkook mid-blink and you squinting.

And yeah, maybe the two of you weren’t that couple who’d take each other out to romantic candlelit dinners, and weren’t the type to call each other adorably affectionate pet names, and maybe the two of you get too competitive with each other sometimes.

But the both of you were still pretty darn cute, even if you do say so yourself.

a/n:

yay to uploading after forever; i just can’t seem to let this au go! special shoutout to @fan-ati--c for requesting this, i rly hope you liked it :3

[kwrittink]

Clumsy Pup /12

Pairing: Reader x Hybrid!Kim NamJoon., Genre: Fluff/Smut

Warnings: language, period mention, sexual themes, masturbation. 

Words: 4,332

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- Y/N? - the shout from outside the bathroom door startled you, undoing the grimace you had on after looking down to your panties. I got my period, ugh. That was the first one since you stopped taking birth control pills

- Yes Joonie? - even after you cleared your throat your voice came out croaked, and you cringed at it, annoyed. 

- Uh I smell blood and... I was just wondering if everything is okay, do you need any help? - he asked and you had to scoff. Of course that was it, what to expect when you lived with a man that had enhanced sense of smell like NamJoon? But how can I explain this to him? Without grossing him out, that is...

- Oh yes I’m okay, it’s just... Well that time of the month, you know, for us females. - you tried, wincing silently as you held to the toilet, hoping he understood you enough. There was a minute of silence before a soft “oh” could be heard from outside. Seconds later you heard footsteps as NamJoon walked away, and that made you sigh. I guess he did understand. 

Though having your period at that point made sense - it had been a little more than a month and the little breakouts on your face were driving you insane, what to say about hormones - it kind of made you wonder if what had happened the other night with NamJoon had been because of the smell of your hormones. I read something about that and I gather that they are really sensitive to hormones so he might have scented that I was on the last of my fertile interval. 

The realization made you blush, even if you knew that his reactions that night were partially due sleepiness, your hormones and the lavender - it was known as an aphrodisiac in some parts of the world so perhaps that affected NamJoon in some extent -, you couldn’t brush the feeling of him nuzzling your neck, his hot breath fanning over your cold skin, lips brushing ever-so-lightly and making your whole body quiver, and his voice, the low tone that contained a purr that still reverberated deep in your chest... And how he held you so close to his body as you melted on his touch. You still felt your knees weak thinking about that. 

After getting a shower - also hand washing your stained stuff so NamJoon wouldn’t be bothered by it - you sauntered back to your room to change and get ready for the day, having spare time before heading out to work. NamJoon decided to stay home that day, saying that he wanted to finish a book or two he was currently reading - prompting you to ask yourself how smart could he be to be reading two books at the same time -, so you would have to just miss him the whole day. Getting him a phone will be very useful indeed. You thought, even more set on your decision of gifting that item for him. It’s going to cost me some money, but will be worth it. 

- Joonie, have you seen my... - your voice died on your throat as you caught the hybrid looking startled to you from the kitchen counter with a thermos bottle. 

- I... In the meantime you were showering I searched the web for something for you to eat and drink while at work for these... Days - he started explaining without coaxing, and you purse your lips trying to contain a smile as you leaned on the doorframe. - And though we don’t have most of the things I mixed cinnamon and ginger, which said they eased pain and such, and made a tea out of it. Now I think it smells strong but it kinda tasted good, and since you like sweet things - continued, pulling sugar packs from the holder on the counter and placing them beside the bottle, proceeding to explain that you had only to put one inside and shake a bit, and that the thermos had three cups worth of tea inside. As you nodded, your eyes went to the little paper bag on the counter that had some packs that looked a lot with the chocolates and candy bars you liked to “steal” from the fridge once in a while. 

- Oh these are chocolates, I read that they release oxytocin and keep you happy, and I also put some crackers for the tea, if you wish to. I hope you don’t mind. - he finished, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt. A big man like this all cute and shy... What am I going to do with him? Your heart was doubled in size, you couldn’t even believe you were even awake. 

- Mind? This is more than anyone has do for me, you dummy. - And here comes the hormones, I’m crying. The tears fell even as you smiled, it was such a small gesture but so touching, that maybe, just maybe you would have cried without the help of hormones too. It was cute, he was cute, and you didn’t want anything more than just kiss him at that point. 

Chuckling at his startled expression - NamJoon was probably panicking thinking he made you cry - you just settled by walking up to him and clinging on his neck, hugging it tightly as you sniffed, glad that you also hadn’t bothered putting on makeup. Realizing everything was okay, he hugged you back and rubbed his face on the top of your head endearingly. 

- You’re really good to me, Joonie. The best man in the world, don’t ever leave me okay? - now that was definitely hormones. Yes you felt like that, but there was no need to utter and scare NamJoon that way, but you couldn’t help it. You were extremely sensitive and had a penchant for being dramatic in those occasions. 

- I’m sorry, but you’re the one stuck with me. - NamJoon snickered and you let him go, sniffing one last time as mild embarrassment hit you for your actions. Still you giggled with him, even picking up a tiny chocolate bar from the “snack bag”, chewing at it with a sense of guilt, but also relief. I have to take a pic of this when I get to the library today. 

- We’re settled then, we’re not going anywhere away from each other. - you stated, to which NamJoon nodded with a cute dimpled smile. Your phone rang, the familiar tone reminding you that you had ten minutes to get to work. - Oh, I got to head out! I’ll see you later, be good and if anything, you know where the emergency contacts are. - rushing you grabbed the food he had done, chuckling at the way he rolled his eyes at you for saying the same things every time you left. It doesn’t hurt to reinforce. You then absentmindedly raised in your tiptoes, pressing a kiss to his cheek, then ran out the house in a frenzy, suddenly embarrassed by what you did, leaving a stunned NamJoon. 

- Ah, so your boyfriend did this for you? That’s so cute! - MinHyuk teased, as soon as you gingerly placed the makeshift lunchbox on the table of the backroom. Scoffing you fished yet another candy bar from the bag, turning to your boss while opening it. 

- You know what tease me as much as you want, you can only wish to have someone to make you these kind of cute stuff. - dodging MinHyuk’s hand as he tried to snatch your food you took a bite, you chuckled. 

- Do you know Kihyun? You know, the guy who owns a coffee shop right down the street? He does makes my breakfast every morning, you know. - he quipped, as you took a sip of the tea - it really needed all the sugar packets NamJoon put in there. Straight up medicine, but no way I’m getting rid of this. You thought, while turning to snap a picture of the set thing, so you could send to Lisa and brag about it later.

- Yeah but... I didn’t have to pay for this. - throwing him a winner smile you finish the candy and put on the black apron that was the only thing labeled as uniform on the store. I don’t mind one bit, being completely honest. 

- Okay, you had enough of rubbing your boyfriend on my face already. Let’s get to work. - defeated, MinHyuk followed you to the front of the store to open it, and start your work day. You tried to ignore once again MinHyuk’s mention of NamJoon as your boyfriend, because you knew that he had spoken to Kihyun over the weekend - the whole store was strangely too clean to be MinHyuk’s doing -, so it was just what they speculated. Thought I explained more or less to MinHyuk about Joon’s situation, so I know it’s just teasing. 

You started working, sorting out some books and doing some resumes on the new volumes that arrived. 

Romance, fantasy/sci-fi(?) short but worth re-reading

Tilting your head at your notebook - where you kept notes on some books for later data input - you wondered when you had written that note and what book it was about, but then you realized, the handwriting was totally different from yours - it was gorgeous. Neat and clear, nothing remotely close to your messy attempt of writing. This must be NamJoon’s... I think he mistook it from the one I lent him. 

- I was looking for a recommendation on a book, but seeing you smile like that made me curious about what you’re reading. - the comment startled you the deep voice of the speaker dragged you to the other night, where NamJoon spoke right beside your ear, and you couldn’t help the shudder as you clutched your chest. In front of you, ChangKyun chuckled amused at your reaction.

- You should stop hanging out with Kihyun, the cheesiness is starting to get stuck. - you whispered, throwing him an unamused glance. The blondish boy leaned on the counter where you were working, peeking at what you were doing. 

- Well we could be hanging out instead, but you’re always curving me. - he shot back, and you took a deep breath, looking back to your screen and resuming work with a soft grin. ChangKyun was such a sweetheart, a very good friend - even if he was closer to KiHyun -, but happened to be very flirty with everything that moved. And you had been his target for as long as you’ve been single, though nothing would come out of his “advances”. He knew you didn’t looked at him like that but did it hurt to try?

- Since you’ve came back from traveling, why don’t we all hang out then? I’m sure the others miss you. - upon hearing you he scoffed, realizing that still there was no use flirting with you. 

- Ah you came late to the game once again, Y/N has another boyfriend already. - MinHyuk started, prompting you to groan while he popped beside you, throwing an arm around your shoulders. ChangKyun gasped a surprised “really?”, looking absolutely thrilled. MinHyuk leaned on the counter, nodding enthusiastically as he started blabbering about what KiHyun told him, making you roll your eyes. Yes, I also have to kill KiHyun for putting a soft aphrodisiac in NamJoon’s drink. I’m sure he knew about that, he and JooHeon are obsessed with those kind of stuff with herbs and everything.

Sighing you went back to type data while they gossiped, realizing they never talked about your love life before - you’ve met them all months in dating Jihyun, when you started working at the library -, and even if it was a little annoying, it was also nice to see them supporting you. Even if NamJoon wasn’t really your boyfriend. 

- Guys, NamJoon isn- 

- Oh, we should all hang out then, go to a karaoke or something, or have some drinks, what do you say Y/N? - ChangKyun interrupted you as you were about to explain that you and Joonie weren’t actually in a relationship, KiHyun had just assumed that the other night and it was spreading around. Again is none of their business but also can be harmful, I don’t know how Joon would feel about that.

- I just proposed that five minutes ago, Kukkun. But yeah, I’d like you guys to meet NamJoon, but maybe in a more calm environment? You know, his hearing is kinda sensitive and karaokes are loud... - you trailed off, looking to your boss to see if he understood the situation. 

- Oh yeah! Y/N is right, we should choose something a little more peaceful, since Joonie is a hybrid. - you actually cringed as he said those words, even if MinHyuk spoke - like it should be spoken, to be honest - like it was just a small detail. But your wince was because you didn’t knew how ChangKyun would react to that. I know he’s a nice guy, but we can never be so sure about people... 

- Ah, plausible, and there’s also Honey right? - the other friend shrugged as casually as one could while taking his phone out of his pocket, when it rang. - Oh shit guys you’ll have to excuse me, I have this thing in a few minutes and I’m kinda late... We can talk about this later, make sure MinHyuk put you on the groupchat so we can all discuss this better. - ChangKyun was suddenly in a hurry and you saw MinHyuk squint at him suspiciously. Sure, you’re late to this “thing”... You snickered, as aware of his ways as MinHyuk. Nonetheless, when ChangKyun leaned on the counter to wrap his arm around your frame in a quick hug you just wished him good luck, instead of being innapropriate like your boss and shout for him to “use protection”. 

After he left you actually felt relieved of their reaction - even if, again, NamJoon wasn’t really your boyfriend. I have to talk to them later on about that... Of course there was KiHyun’s case, but you also knew Honey was considered more human that any other type of hybrid. It’s irritating yes, but it’s more because she doesn’t have the “characteristics” of a hybrid, besides the antennas are barely noticeable. She just likes sweets and to eat vibrant flowers sometimes... And spring is a crazy season for her. You snickered, while eating the rest of your lunch, being able to bare the strong taste of the tea with the five packets of sugar NamJoon had put inside. 

- Hey Y/N, what do you think about closing up for today? - MinHyuk suddenly asked, pulling you out of your thoughts to look at him, not even surprised. He usually started to close soon at the beginning of December, only to extend the working hours the three days before Christmas Eve. 

- Being quite honest I’d like to have the rest of the day off. NamJoon packed me this “Period Snack Pack” but it works only to some extent. - you shrugged, making MinHyuk grimace at you words. 

- He’s too cute for this world, I’m actually concerned to introduce them to the others. Hoseok included, he will freak out at his cuteness for sure. - he said, and you had to agree chuckling, because that was a certainty. Well but I guess that, being Lisa’s cousin he met JiMin, and I’m pretty sure that’s as cute as one can get - even if Joons threatens to match up. 

- Yeah, we’ll see. Anyways, you need help to close up? - getting up you gathered your things, and being dismissed by your boss with a shake of his head, you then practically skipped the way back home, ready to come back and cuddle NamJoon - after a good shower, that is. 

The apartment was as quiet as always when you walked in, but you soon spotted NamJoon sitting on the couch, reading something while the TV was on in a low volume. You didn’t mind the TV, since it made him feel less lonely - you discovered that even if he said once he was fine by himself, those little things like turning the TV or music helped him a lot -, but  noticed he was squinting at the book, and made a mental note to propose him to go for an eye doctor later on the future. 

- Oh, you’re home early. Everyth... - as you plopped by his side - startling him, might you add - he frowned then sniffed the air once, tilting his head slightly to the side. 

- What happened? - you mimicked his expression, also trying to detect what he was smelling, as NamJoon continued to try the air around you. 

- There’s a different smell here... On you - you were startled when he leaned close to your face, eyes not really focused and absentmindedly grabbed your shoulders to keep you still while he snuffled around, getting closer to your neck every time. 

You wondered for a second if the smell of blood was still strong on you, or if he was detecting MinHyuk’s scent, until he growled under his breath, clutching the fabric of your shirt. 

- Who’s this guy? - you weren’t completely sure if he was asking you or himself till he looked up with a scowl and piercing, dominating stare towards you. 

- Oh right, ChangKyun-

- Why did he touched you? - his fingers gripped the wool of your shirt tighter, and you would think about being at least the tiniest scared if his face weren’t so close and his voice didn’t sounded so fucking good in your ears. 

- He hugged me goodbye, tha-that’s all... He’s a friend, Joonie. - you couldn’t  believe how weak your voice was and body completely paralyzed - again, not from fear, you didn’t thought yourself capable of fearing NamJoon at that point anymore -, pinned to the couch with his glare on your face. But as soon as you called by his nickname, his body kind of jolted like he got back to reality, and eyes refocused to look at yours, quickly averting as he started to get embarrassed by his actions. 

- Ah, yeah I’m sorry it’s that uh... I don’t know him and his smell is all over you it’s kind of annoying. - you had the urge to chuckle and, despite your attempts you couldn’t hold it back, snorting while you grabbed his hands reassuringly. It was kind of a safety measure and in a way it was cute - him being possessive for a second was ridiculously hot but you weren’t about to delve into that thought yet - but it was something he would have to get used to, more yet when you went to the Christmas party on Lisa’s home, where a lot of hugging people would be involved for you. I don’t want him to feel uncomfortable because my friends are touchy with me, but it’s good that this happened now. 

- It’s okay, I get it. But Joon - you started, squeezing his hands so he’d look at you. Timidly NamJoon glanced up, lower lip worrying between his teeth and ears flat on his head. - This will happen a lot from now on, you’ll meet a handful of my friends soon you know, at the Christmas party. I just want to give you this heads up because a lot of people will be touching me there. Including this one, which is a really good friend of mine. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable so... - trailing off you smiled at him, and NamJoon nodded, even if you noticed that the idea of other people getting close to you didn’t pleased him that much. But still he sighed, leaning to press his face on your shoulder, sniffing deeply, as to keep the smell on his memory. 

- Annoying. - he muttered, pouting. Giggling you rolled your eyes, and grabbed his head in an impulsive move, pressing his face between your palms and successfully squishing his cheeks so much his pout turned into something similar to those cute stuffed little chicks Lisa had gave you once in your birthday. 

- Would you feel better if I changed myself? - you asked, feeling his face grow hot while he nodded slowly, prompting you to cackle and press a kiss on his forehead. For the second time on that day NamJoon was stunned, and kept the gaped expression towards you as his eyes followed your figure walk away to the rooms. His reaction was actually really cute - and kind of flattering in a way, to see him that disarmed because of something so little - but you also knew that you couldn’t push it too far, even if the plumpness of his lips was so tempting all the time. NamJoon has to heal first. 

After the shower and a change of clean clothes, you were feeling much better, even though your uterus was still battling to death inside your body. But oh well, what it is to be a woman.

NamJoon was nowhere to be seen when you walked to the living room again, but you shrugged it off, thinking maybe he went to do something in his room, so you went up about your own business, busying yourself with making something tasty to eat - you lost your appetite at that time of the month, for some inexplicable reason -, since Joonie didn’t looked like he ate anything yet. 

The food was midway done and you were happily singing some song out of tune - NamJoon said it was cute once, but usually would lay his ears flat on his head with a small wince because of the disharmony -, and only then got worried for the hybrid’s absence, since that combination would generally make him come out from wherever he was.

- Joons? - you called out towards the hallway, frowning a little bit when no response came. Maybe he’s taking a nap. You guessed, but still something in your gut told to check on him. That’s why you turned the heat off and headed to his room, quietly stepping inside and looking around, but didn’t find any sign of him. Where can he be... You were about to shout his name when the sound of water running made you pause. Oh, he’s taking a shower, okay.

-... Never again this smell - you heard him grunt from the other side of the door and tilted your head, wondering what NamJoon could mean by that. Maybe Joon still has ChangKyun’s scent on his nose? He did said it was an annoying smell after all. Snickering you leaned to pick the clothes at the foot of the door, NamJoon was a tidy guy but he might have been really bothered by the smell to just drop his jacket and shirt on the floor like that. 

A high pitched keen followed, stopping your motions and you wondered when was the last time you heard NamJoon make that sound, only relating it to pain. The frown returned to your face as you got up, about to lean on the door to confirm you heard him correctly, but as you placed your hand on the wood, the door gaped slightly, not even being closed correctly. 

- Hey Jo-

- Y/N’s mine, don’t want other men’ smell, mine! - the snarl made all the hairs on your body stand, you’ve never heard NamJoon’s voice this dark, sure he’s the owner of the deepest voice you’ve ever heard, but that kind of violence in his voice was totally foreign to you. 

Movement caught your attention from the corner of your eye, and you glanced to your left, inside the gap the door provided you, meeting the mirror and a moving body on the reflection. NamJoon’s moving body. 

Stark naked, the reflection on the mirror displayed his sweaty body sitting on top of the toilet, tail spiked at his side and eyes shut close tightly, face scrunched in a deep scowl while he strained to not make any more sounds besides the eventual threatening growls under his huffs. With your jaw dropped, your eyes trailed down to where his hands rested, and recognized immediately that the thing covering the majority of his waist - or at least what he wasn’t holding so tightly -, as the wool shirt you have been using moments prior, the one that was with ChangKyun’s smell and that possibly triggered this whole situation. NamJoon was gripping the fabric tightly wrapped around what you thought to be his cock - again, the shirt didn’t let you see much -, while he slid it up and down with quick movements, the other hand gripping his base. As he whimpered again your thighs trembled, and you had to immediately twirl in your heels, pressing your back to the outer wall to try and breath out silently before you echoed his sounds. This is so wrong, so fucking wrong, oh my god. 

That was what you thought, but not in a way that disgusted you, no. Much the contrary... It almost scared you the way that image NamJoon gave you made your insides ache and throb, and how aroused you’ve become despite your period and all. You wanted NamJoon, and you wanted him bad. And the fact that you could still hear his groans and whines of your name, the threats and the claiming over you weren’t helping you in any way. 

But what am I supposed to do? This doesn’t mean I can do something about it, does it?

[readyplayerhobi]

Life Is A Whisk

; Jin x Reader

; Genre: Fluff, Crack

; Word Count: 3.2k

; Synopsis: You have no problem with Kim Seokjin most of the time, in fact you even consider him to be handsome and funny and he feels the same about you. Until you are both placed into a kitchen, and then it becomes the battlegrounds for World War Three, the Bake-off edition.

; A/N: Lol honestly what even is this. I just got an idea in my head and this happened and it’s not even good so I’m sorry! I’M SORRY OKAY? Its probably got the wrong label genres too so idek.

Baking to you was an art form. While the Mona Lisa is truly a beautiful piece of artwork, it could only be experienced in its natural habit if you happened to be in the vicinity of Paris.

 Only the most talented with a paintbrush, pen or pencil would be able to even attempt to reproduce the masterpiece that Leonardo da Vinci created over 500 years ago. But anyone could bake in your opinion; all you needed was some flour, eggs, butter, sugar and a little bit of time.

 And just like art, the end result could vary drastically. A cake could look dubious, as if a 2 year old had created it out of Play-Doh, yet it could taste like an angel had blessed your tongue itself.

 Alternatively, a cake could look so delicious it could seem like it had been created to grace the very halls of Buckingham Palace. But it could taste like the ashes of yesterdays regrets.

 Yes, baking was an art form and in your ever so humble opinion, you were the best baker you knew. If only it weren’t for the annoying, and aggravatingly handsome, Kim Seokjin arguing that no, actually he was the best baker.

 “Seokjin, you wouldn’t know what filo pastry is if it jumped up from the table and slapped you in the face.” You hiss at him from across the living room. He’s glaring at you, arms crossed over his broad chest as he scoffs and rolls his eyes.

 Hoseok, sat next to him, lets out a long, suffering sigh and sinks lower into the cream coloured sofa in the hopes that he can sink away to his own house somehow. Namjoon catches Hoseok’s eye from his place next to you and grimaces, wishing desperately that no one had decided to turn on The Great British Bake Off in the first damn place.

 Everyone knew that anything related to the world of baking and kitchens was to be treated like the shadow land in The Lion King. That’s dangerous land Jungkook; we don’t go there if we want peace amongst friends.

 You’d been more than happy to watch your British counterparts baking and more than enjoyed the amusing puns that they constantly quipped. “It’s just not the same without Mel and Sue you know.” Jimin had whined at one point, which had you nodding in commiseration.

 It had all been civil even, neither you nor Jin engaging in any arguments or back handed compliments. Honestly you were fine with each other when baking or cooking wasn’t involved, you would even say that he was a great friend to you – who you were also unreasonably attracted to.

 But then Taehyung had made the dumb decision to ask who would win if they ever went on the show. And of course you’d decided to boldly proclaim that the winner would obviously be you because you were evidently the best baker in the room. Which had resulted in the current argument between you and Jin.

 “I remember the last time you tried to make choux pastry Y/N. It’s so simply and yet I’ve never witnessed anything as disappointing and limp since I saw-“ Hoseok slaps a hand over Jin’s mouth at that, fully aware that some insult to one of the guys was incoming. It was one thing to watch you both argue, it was another to get everyone else involved.

 You scowl furiously, rising up slightly out of your seat as you move to defend yourself and your amazing baking skills. A hand on your shoulder yanking you back down distracts you and you can’t help but glare at Yoongi’s hand.

 “Why don’t you both have a bake off then? We’ll judge who’s the best.” Jungkook mutters quietly and you swear that if the intensity of the glares he’s getting from the others could be turned into a power source, you’d be able to power Seoul for a year.

 Jin stares at him with wide eyes before a thoughtful look takes over his face. He sucks his lush, lower lip into his teeth as he simply watches you for a moment. His intense stare causes you to squirm slightly, he may be your mortal enemy in the kitchen but you were more than happy to say that he was quite possibly the most handsome man in the world.

 “What would be the point? We’d just get angry at you all for whoever lost.” He mutters and you nod your head. The embarrassment and fury at losing would be far too much for you to handle and Jin was a hothead too.

 “Oh come on, I’m sure we all knead to know who’s truly the best. Besides, you both like baking and we get to eat delicious sweet treats, so it’s a win-win for all of us. Why? Are you both too wimpy to rise to the occasion?” Taehyung smirks; completely nonplussed when everyone groans at his puns though Jin gives him a subtle nod of approval.

 “Okay, I’m game for it. What about you Y/N? I think it’s the yeast you can do after bragging for so long. You and I with one kitchen and one winner. Batter the devil you know right?” Jin sits forward, leaning his elbows on his knees and the fact that he took Tae’s lead on the puns makes you want to roll your eyes. But instead you’re far too focused on how sinful his position makes his shoulders look. Particularly in that damn black turtleneck. It’s enough to make your mouth water.

 You pause for a moment, taking in everyone’s faces as they look on in intrigue. While no one wants to witness World War Three: The Bake Off Edition, they’d all be willing to endure it for some good food you’re sure.

 “Alright Jin, you’re on. We’ll see who’s the best.” Standing, you both shake hands and you try your best to ignore how damn good his hand feels. As you do so, the guys immediately drop into planning mode.

  The competition was arranged for the following week on the Saturday. It gave you both plenty of time to prepare what you were going to create under the rules that the rest of your group had given you, which was mainly to be fair and don’t cheat. Or be an ass.

 You’d both decided to let your friends make the challenges, which had resulted in frantic texts between them all as they tried to decide on what they wanted to eat for the first two days. The end result was three challenges.

 1.     A salted caramel cheesecake (Jungkook had begged for a cheesecake)

2.     Black forest brownies (Namjoon demanded that at least something had to have fruit to be a little healthy)

3.     Triple chocolate cookies (That had been the one everyone agreed on quickest)

 Surprisingly, both Jin and you had complained that the challenges weren’t hard enough to test your skills. But the group had been firm, wanting to have food that was both quick enough to make but also wouldn’t result in you both strangling each other. That meant no filo pastry this time.

 It actually surprised you how into the competition everyone was as they had all agreed to buy the ingredients themselves to prevent any ‘cheating’ from the two of you. You could still hear the ringing in your ears from Jin’s rant about that and honestly you agreed, how were you going to cheat exactly?

 It had been decided that the competition was going to take place in the restaurant that Namjoon and Jin owned together before it opened up for the day, as none of you owned a kitchen with two ovens. Which was how you were stood in the middle of a high tech looking kitchen while you wrapped the cords of your cute Pokémon themed apron around your front.

 “Ready to lose Y/N?” Jin teased lightly, his tone more playful than mean as his hand fluttering along your back lightly as he passed by behind you. Shivers erupted from the slight touch and you nodded, not entirely positive that you trusted your voice to speak for you.

 The guys had had way too much fun setting up this whole competition, even going to the extent of decorating the kitchen to add some ‘ambience’ as Taehyung called it. Personally you just thought he wanted an excuse to decorate but whatever, it wasn’t something that you needed to focus on.

 Both of you stood in front of your relevant work stations, surrounded by the baking bounties that would mix together to produce the most delicious food possible.

 “Okay you argumentative fucks. Hopefully this will resolve any more arguments you have in the future. Remember…its mind over batter. Three, two, one…go!” Yoongi called out, a hand coming down like he was directing a drag race or something.

 Hoseok glared at him and muttered out in disgust at the fact Yoongi had even got involved in the puns, but the blonde man simply gave a delighted gummy smile. They’d all agreed that they didn’t even care who won; they were just going to reap the yummy baked benefits and so the excitement was palpable amongst them.

 “I hope you’re ready to lose.” Jin comments casually as he begins to measure out his ingredients. You sneer, though the striking figure he makes momentarily distracts you from making a comment back to him.

 You immediately moved to grab the ingredients to start the cheesecake, deciding to tackle that first, as it had to wait the longest to cool down. This had been mentioned to Jungkook many times but he’d been adamant that he wanted a cheesecake and what Jungkook wanted, Jungkook got.

 Out of the corner of your eye you notice Jin obviously deciding to do the same as he began to pour plain digestive biscuits into a bag and began to hammer it with a rolling pin to create the base of the cake.

 As you both work, you find that there’s an almost comfortable silence between you two. It surprises you, as you’d have thought that there’d be more shit talking between the two. Not to say that there wasn’t shit talking every now and then.

 “You beat your eggs really oddly, you know that?” Jin commented as he placed his almost finished cheesecake in the oven to bake for the final time. You frowned at the fact he’d worked so fast and cursed those delicious looking biceps of his for allowing him to work faster.

 “Being a woman I’m not as acquainted with beating things as you are Jin.” There’s a snort of laughter from the peanut gallery and you eye Jimin making a jerking motion to the others with a smile. Jin scowls over at you, as he quickly cleans his dishes and begins to prepare for the brownies.

 “Hilarious.” He whispers into your ear, causing you to shiver, as he moves past you to grab a fresh and clean whisk, evidently deciding not to bother cleaning his. As you pour in the cheese mixture on top of your cake, you can’t help but bite your lip as you admire his figure yet again before shaking your head and concentrating again.

 The only noise for the next few minutes as you begin to focus on making the brownie batter, folding in the sour cherries with care, is the low murmuring from the guys. They’re already whining at the smell of cheesecake in the air and even you have to admit that it’s making you hungry.

 “Hey Y/N, why did the chocolate cake go to the doctors?” Jin suddenly speaks up. You pause in the middle of pouring the batter into the baking tray and look up at him suspiciously.

 “I don’t know, do I want to know?” Murmuring suspiciously, you look back at your task and wait for his response. Why he’s suddenly decided to make a joke is beyond you but this was Jin, he did things like this. Yoongi is already groaning at the punch line and he’s not even heard it.

 “Because it was feeling crumby!” Almost immediately Jin is laughing while everyone groans, with the exception of Jimin who falls of his chair in laughter. You can’t help the corners of your lips rising and you let out a soft exhale of a laugh.

 Having found an audience for his jokes who obviously couldn’t leave, Jin continues with both jokes and puns as you both begin the process of baking your cookies. You’re not sure if he’s being serious and simply wanting to make people laugh, or if he’s trying to distract you so that your stuff tastes bad but either way, you can’t help but giggle at him.

 He also seems to keep finding reasons to invade your personal space, claiming that he needs a certain ingredient or utensil and leaning over you. If he thinks that he can spy on how you’re baking or distract you then he’s dead wrong.

 Well, kind of wrong. He smells phenomenal and your nose would be as long as the equator if you said he didn’t make your stomach flip when he got close. Maybe that was his game.

 With a tray of brownies and a rather delicious looking cheesecake cooling, you’re simply waiting on the two trays of cookies that you had made to finish baking. Everyone moves forward to help you both clean up and they all compliment you both on not tearing each other’s throats out.

 “Honestly, I was expecting like some actual blood to fly. Whether it’s because you cut yourself or murdered each other. Congratulations on acting like grown adults and not 2 years olds.” Hoseok grins, patting you both on the shoulders proudly, despite the fact that Jin is older than him.

 You glare at him and stick your tongue out, causing him to immediately revoke his previous comment for you. “We’re not that bad.” You grunt out. Jin laughs next to you, high pitched and loud.

 “We kind of are Y/N.” He muses, staring at you deeply. You’re about to ask if there’s something on your face when he suddenly reaches out and wipes away some flour on your cheek with his thumb. Dumbstruck, you’re not entirely sure what to do and turn away to busy yourself with cleaning the bowls, cheeks flaming red.

 It’s only been around an hour since the cheesecake finished baking and both Jin and you complain at the fact the guys won’t let them rest properly. They promptly ignore you and begin to cut into your masterpieces eagerly.

 “They’re not going to taste as good as it would if you leave it! You’re not doing it right – dammit Jungkook!” You curse the younger man as he stuffs his mouth with a large piece. He simply grins at you, causing you to pull a face as his teeth are stained with chocolate.

 A groan leaves him as his eyes flutter shut and Jimin makes the same noise next to him. On the other side of the table, Taehyung and Hoseok are also apparently having a sexual awakening as they try Jin’s.

 Yoongi and Namjoon are too busy trying to stuff their face full of brownies, alternating between the two bakers. Both Jin and you stand there, antsy and impatiently awaiting their results before you both decide to try each other’s food as well.

 You begrudgingly congratulate Jin, noting that his food tastes as delicious as he boasts. In fact it takes everything inside you to stop yourself your moaning at the burst of flavours on your tongue and you curse the fact that the man is not only wildly attractive but also unbelievably talented in the kitchen.

 It takes a few more minutes of moaning, to which you ask them if they could wait until you leave the room for them to reach completion, before they finally discuss their opinions quietly on the other side of the room before giving their verdict.

 Standing in front of you, they all look just a little blissed out from the food they’d just inhaled, and Jungkook looks like he might vibrate through the floor from his sugar overdose.

 “Honestly, you both win. How are we supposed to choose between perfection?” Namjoon states, grinning as he grabs what must be his fourth cookie. Taehyung nods his head in agreement as he reaches for another brownie. Everything is almost gone already.

 Both Jin and you stand in shock before you both begin to complain loudly at the unfairness of it all. “Why bother making us compete if you weren’t going to give the winner to one of us?” You glare at Jimin, causing an impish grin to spread across his face.

 “Honestly, we just wanted some damn good food and we did say that we don’t care who wins. Besides! You both worked pretty well together, there was far less arguing than we thought so…everyone’s a winner right?” You grumble as you shove one of the remaining brownies into your own mouth, mentally cursing out everyone in the kitchen.

 Jin chuckles suddenly and you glare at him. “Why are you laughing? You didn’t win either! We just basically made these empty pits food! All that effort wasted.” You gesture towards the boys, noting that none of them seem that bothered by your irritated words.

 “I don’t know why you expected any different from them.” He states the obvious, raising his eyebrow at you. “Besides, it means I got to spend some time with you.”

 You’re choking on your brownie then as the guys all ooh softly in the background, grins plastered on all their faces. With wide eyes, you look back at him and wonder if you’d just heard him right. Jin had always flirted with you, but you’d always thought it was just him being funny like always.

 As you go to open your mouth to question him, he suddenly leans forward and seals his lips to yours. Shock renders you still as Jin’s soft, pliant lips move over your own, causing your eyes to flutter shut while Taehyung screams out “Finally!” in the background.

 Jin pulls away slowly and gives you a grin, his eyes flickering down before a finger coming up to wipe away something from your bottom lip. He lifts it up to show you the chocolate now on his finger before sucking it into his mouth.

 “Do you want to go on a date with me? I think we could bake each other really happy.” He murmurs softly, a grin spreading over his face as you go from swooning to frowning at his pun. Instead of responding to him verbally, you give him your answer by simply pulling him back down.

[curledlife]

bigger kpop tag!

I was tagged by the amazing @sunshine-myg for this kpop tag!! Thank you so much and sorry it’s so damn late hha

1.) 5 favorite groups?

bts, ikon, winner, idle, vixx 

2.) Top 5 on your bias list?

taehyung, junhoe/jinhwan, mino, yuqi, and hongbin <3 (we count junhoe and jinhwan into one k)

3.) Ult Bias group and why you love them?

I don’t really have one tbh...plus I don’t know what ult bias group means..forgive me ;-; 

4.) Ult Bias and why you love them?

...AS WE ALL KNOW, IT’S KIM TAEHYUNG AKA GUCCI KING. The first time I really saw him shine was on the Not Today live stage and I was attracted by his gaze and his charisma. He really has this era around him that is silly and yet serious at the same time. I love how cutely he stumbles over his words sometimes and that he puts so much effort into learning something new whether it be a new language or a new hobby. He’s such a family man that it enlarges my heart 10 fold. He was my first bias and became my ult bias for many reasons. His boxy smile could recharge my day as well as his encouraging words to ARMY. His voice when he sings, it's more like chocolate intertwined with honey. He can hit such low notes but he can also hit high asf notes..listen to stigma. I love someone who is very versatile with their settings and how his eyes shine just by talking about art, music, or anything that sparks his interest. I love the silly side of him because that’s the side that will cheer you up no matter what. Thank you taehyung for being you <3 (I have to stop cause if I don’t..this will be an essay)

5.) Favorite Kpop Meme

MY TWO FOREVER MOODS LMAO

6.) Favorite pic of your ult? (I dare you to only pick one)

7.) 5 Favorite Kpop MVs

Spring Day (BTS), Voodoo Doll (VIXX), Fool (Winner), Love Scenario (iKON), The Real (N.Flying)

8.) 10 Favorite Kpop songs?

Hold Me Tight (BTS), Don’t (Loco & Hwasa), Just Do It (Gray Ft. Loco), Lady (EXID), Fake Love (BTS), Fool (Winner), Wings (KREAM), Golden (Hoody), Bittersweet (Crush), All Day (DinDin)

9.) Favorite Kpop crack video?

I don’t watch many crack videos anymore but here is a video I watched a lot when I was obsessed with BTS ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_aFe5y_OXgo )

10.) Favorite content creator within the fandom?

i get blogs mixed up all the time so I’m not too sure

11.) What fandoms would you say you’re an active member of?

Army (that is really about to change...army is wildin this year and not in a good way), ikonic, inner circle

12.) Take your top 3 biases- fmk

F - Mino

Marry - Taehyung

Kill with kindness - Junhoe...he’s like an older brother to me xD

13.) If you could be best friends with any idol, who would you choose?

Taeyong, Mark, Lisa, Woozi

14.) If you could date any idol, who?

Top 3 biases up there ^^

15.) What’s one Kpop album you think everyone should have listened to?

Dark & Wild (BTS) 

HER (DPR LIVE) cause you always gotta have some rap

16.) Are you a soft or a hard stan?

fucking both (it’s a huge nut when I see some thighs..sue me)

17.) An idol that makes you go into soft mode?

J HOPE FUCKING YES, HE’S ALWAYS SMILING UGH <3

18.) An idol that makes you want to smash the empire state building with one single punch?

Everyone in my top 5 groups.

19.) Favorite vocalist?

Taehyung, Chen, Ailee, Wheein, Hwasa, Hoody, and more

20.) Favorite Rapper?

Yoongi, DPR Live, Loco, Mino, Hanbin, Yongguk and more

21.) Favorite dancer?

bts dance line, seungri, hakyeon, jongup, donghyuk etc.

22.) Things you have in common with your ult?

we have common interests and we are ambiverts.

23.) The most beautiful trait any idol can have?

genuine, humble and respectful, the confidence to act themselves

24.) Songs that will always make you jam along?

Gold (offonoff ft. dean), I am him (Winner), All I Wanna Do (Jay Park), Am I Wrong (BTS), Baby Don’t Like It (NCT), Base Line ( J hope), Bboom Bboom (momoland), and etc

25.) Your worst wrecker?

PARK FUCKING JIMIN and KIM HANBIN, k..imma go now.

26.) Any kpop concerts you’ve been to?

I’ve been to the Astro fanmeeting! THEY ARE SUCH HUMBLE BOYS UGH

27.) Favorite choreo?

Spring Day (BTS), Shangri La (VIXX), Hate (4Minute), Fake Love (BTS), Beautiful (Monsta X), Love Scenrio (iKON), Fool (Winner..as you can tell, i love this fucking song), Black Suit (Super Junior)

28.) Favorite live performance?

Fantasy (VIXX) or Shangri La ...I think it was a remix? I don’t remember

29.) Favorite debut mv?

My Type (iKON)

30.) Recommend a rookie group!

Idle!!! They are very precious girls who are getting a lot comfortable in front of the camera!

31.) A kpop song you could listen to every day for the rest of your life?

Singularity (Taehyung)

32.) Tag some cute mutuals you’d like to get to know better (and to do this challenge)!

@x-i-l-verify @pyosunshine @lovepaintt @sunmoon-star @honeyboyhao @stan14u @kflowergirl @imgoodimdonek @royal-kard @cybercnu @monbebana (you don’t have to do it!)

[kpop-wetdreams]

Candy Cane Assassin

Candy Cane Assassin

[one shot; college!AU]

Author: Kpop-Wetdreams

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Rating: PG [fluff & sfw]

Author’s Note: This is inspired by the many wonderful episodes of Community and the insanity they get into with paintball assassin! As part of the BWK Winter Exchange between @kwriterskollection and @bangtanwriters-net for my Secret Santa! I hope you enjoy!

Word Count: 2,516

It was mayhem. Complete and utter mayhem. You had no idea how the school was going to clean up after this mess but you didn’t care. You didn’t even know how it even got to this point! It seemed like it was just a few days ago that your friends were convincing you to join the schoolwide game of paintball assassin that would be taking place on campus on Saturday when there were no more classes and no one on campus other than the participants. You didn’t even know how such an event got sanctioned let alone was ran and organized the school. Your friends had shrugged when you posed that question to them answering you simply with that it was a ‘community college and anything goes’. You were skeptical as to the scale but this was insane! This was like something straight out of the movies and you didn’t think such things happened in real life!

Saturday had been like any other day. Just a normal day. The sun came out, you woke up and got dressed. Unfortunately, it was like most Saturdays where you found yourself heading to school despite it being the weekend. The only difference was today, you weren’t heading to campus to study but to take part in a student event. Your friends had been so giddy and their energy had been infectious that it was impossible to turn them down. You could feel a sense of dread fill you as you signed the waiver that waved the school of liability should you become injured on campus due to this event. Your eyes narrowed as you read the waiver and looked at your friends, contemplating if this was a good idea anymore but their insistent nagging had you signing on the bottom line. The next thing you knew you were given a paintball gun that was painted to look like a candy cane along with red and green paintballs themselves. You looked at the paintball gun, holding it up to your friends. “Is this supposed to be festive?” you ask mockingly as you all laughed. As you all stood in the crowd of at least 150 to 250 people, the PA system overhead blared to life.

“A few rules to make sure everyone stays safe and has a good time! If you are shot in the chest or the back, you are eliminated. Limbs shots such as legs and arms do not count. Headshots are strictly forbidden and if you are found guilty of administering such a shot, you were be eliminated and possible further action may be taken upon you from the college’s disciplinary committee. The leaderboard will be constantly updated and displayed by the various monitors and TVs throughout the college. If you leave the college premises, you will be eliminated. Physically attacking another student will also see to your elimination. As time progresses, we will announce buildings and structures that will become off-limits effectively making the playing field smaller and smaller. The battleground will continue to shrink in size until we are left with a single victor.”

You turn to your friends, eyes wide in alarm as you can see people getting more and more excited about it. “They can’t be serious right? Do people really attack one another at these things?”

“I hear a girl had to be taken to the hospital last year!” Sam said, bouncing up and down, unable to contain herself.

“What the heck are people so determined to win for?! ISN’T THIS JUST FOR SCHOOL SPIRIT AND SOME HOLIDAY FUN?” You ask horrified at what your friends had managed to talk you into.

“....you signed up without knowing what the prize was?” Jack asked, and eyebrow cocked at you and you waved a hand at him.

“Like I said, it wasn’t important at the time! I thought this was just for fun!” You whined wondering if it was too late to withdraw your name from the lot.

“You better bring your A-game __________ because the prize is --”

Just before Chelsea could finish her sentence the PA system blared to life again.

“As you know, the winner will receive PRIORITY REGISTRATION. Which means they will have first pick of all their classes for the upcoming semester. You will be given 15 minutes to situate yourselves. When you hear the siren blare over the PA system, the game will have officially begun. Good luck to you all and keep the spirit of the holidays in your hearts and in your holsters!”

With that everyone started to take off running in every which way. Panic welled up inside of you as you felt increasingly overwhelmed. Priority registration?! They had to be kidding! Just thinking about what you could do with your schedule made you tingle with adrenaline as you felt your competitiveness bubble to the surface. I could make an airtight schedule and have a 4 day weekend! You thought to yourself. You were about to ask your friends about what all their strategies were when you realized that you were the only one in your group of friends that was still standing in the open grass area. “The traitors!” you gasp as you held tightly onto your candy cane paintball gun and the precious paintballs.You ducked into the first building you could which happened to be the library.

You were surprised at the sight that greeted you as all the bookshelves had been covered with plastic as if they were all wearing raincoats! Probably for the best. You thought to yourself as you thought about the practicality of it all. You had to wonder how often the college did events such as this if they were so prepared! This was the first year you had attended the college but even you had heard the stories that were inspired from these events but you always thought they were over exaggerated and dramatized but you realized that maybe everything you had ever heard about these events had been right after all. The sound of the siren over the PA system drags you out from your thoughts as you run towards the back of the library where you knew there were some big cabinets. You threw the first one open and to your surprise, there was already someone in there! You gasp as you quickly ducked and heard the sound of a paintball gun firing over your head. From below you whip out your gun and squeeze the trigger, closing your eyes bracing for the feeling of a paintball exploding against you but it never came. Instead came a sound of a groan as you allow yourself a peek, opening one eye. You had managed to hit the person hiding in the cabinet squarely in the chest and they were holding out their paintballs to you.

“Uh… thanks?” You said as you pocketed the additional ammunition.

And that’s how the game went. It had to have been what… 4 maybe 5 hours since the start of the game? You were one of the lucky ones to still have survived and you had even found a survival fit. Inside there had been a bottle of water, some trail mix, and more paintballs. The library had been one of the first buildings to be eliminated in the playable area shrinking. That had been one of the most perilous situations for you, the run from one building to another. There had been shooters guarding the doors but you had been one of the few making the run at the same time and though it wasn’t ideal, you had used some of the other students as meat shields. You felt a little bad but hey, at the end of the day you were fighting for your 4 day weekend.

He was at the top of the leaderboard. Though the only shot that really mattered was the final one that would determine the victor from the loser, the school was tracking who was being eliminated by who and Taehyung Kim was leading. You recognized the name from your English Literature class. He was a handsome guy that was always laughing and goofing around, sporting name brands and seemingly without a care in the world. You knew it wasn’t fair to judge him on just what you saw on the surface but you couldn’t help it. He somehow always managed to stand at the top of the class without breaking a sweat while you studied until you had bags under your eyes. What you wouldn’t give to put a bullet right in the middle of his chest, well, a paintball of course…. You weren’t the violent type…

You re-tie your hair into a messy bun as you listened to see if you could hear any footsteps when the PA system blared to life which made you almost jump out of your skin.

“We finally have a showdown ladies and gentleman! ___________ and Taehyung Kim are the final assassins in this campus-wide game of Candy Cane Assassins! The battleground for this final showdown is the main gymnasium. All other buildings and locations will be eliminated in 1 minute. The countdown will start at the end of this announcement. GOOD LUCK TO OUR FINALISTS!”

“WHAT?!” You exclaimed in disbelief as you sprinted towards the gym. You weren’t far from the main gym but you weren’t exactly close either. You knew that there were multiple entrances into the main gym and you prayed that you and Taehyung wouldn’t be entering from the same door as that would make for a very anticlimactic end if he just shot you in the boob when you arrived. You ran harder than you had in your entire life. You, the person that wouldn’t even run for the bus. Your chest was heaving and your breathing heavy as you ran towards the doors closest to you. You were surprised to see the doors thrown open but you didn’t have time to think about it as the countdown that was playing over the PA was counting down from only 10 seconds now.

With the final push of your energy, you managed to get your body through the doors as the countdown finished.

“Congratulations to both participants to making it to the main battle stage! To us, you’re both winners but of course, only one of you can walk away with priority registration today! Good luck to you both and remember, embody the spirit of the holidays!”

You sneered at the PA. You swore you were going to find the announcer for this when it was all done and said and you would surely empty a clip of paintballs onto them and see if they feel like embodying the spirit of Christmas after. Once you got a chance to catch your breath you were really able to take in your surroundings.

“WHO HAD TIME TO SET THIS UP?!” You muttered in utter disbelief. A maze of sorts had been erected in the gym, taking up the entire floor. They had decorated everything like a winter wonderland complete with fake snow. You couldn't believe your eyes but you knew you couldn’t afford to be wasting time gawking at your surroundings, especially when you had made it so far. You walked lightly around the maze, hand on the wall to keep yourself orientated, trying to be as quiet as possible but it was hard. The more dead-ends you ran into, the more you were becoming frustrated but since Taehyung hadn’t found you yet either that meant he was struggling just as much as you are.

A loud sound resonated through the gym as something fell and your head whipped towards the source of the sound. You walked back towards the sound carefully and that’s when you realized that the walls of the maze were starting to fall and give way. That meant that soon enough if you didn’t find Taehyung, you would be standing in plain sight as would he. That put some fire back into your belly as you jogged through the maze.

A shot whizzed by you, narrowly missing your shoulder. Your eyes widened as you quickly took a turn, any turn to put some distance between you and him. It had to be him, there was no one else and it was a damned shame that he had found you first. When you rounded a final corner, you saw that it was a dead end. You cursed, doubling back and pressing yourself against the corner, waiting for your target to round it. You hoped that Taehyung would be reckless and just come running around the corner and lucky for you, he did. You cocked your gun and pulled the trigger.

Nothing.

You look at your gun and then at Taehyung’s face 5 feet away.

“Looks like someone is out of ammunition.” He said cockily, advancing on you. You panic, there was nothing left to do but you had to think of something! You were so close to the finish line you could practically taste the egg nog that was sure to be waiting for you.

“You know if you wanted to get me alone ________ you could’ve just asked. This was a very elaborate way to try to get my attention.” Taehyung snickered as you glared.

“You’re so conceited! Why would you think I liked you?” You spat, backing up slowly trying to come up with a way, any way to win.

“...All that flirting? The laughing… the subtle touching. You can’t tell me it was just me.” Taehyung said surprised. You took advantage of his surprise as you lunged forward and relieved him of his candy cane paintball gun.

“Hey now! That wasn’t fair. How about this ______, me or the priority registration.” Taehyung offered with a smile. “Think of how much fun our date would be! I know you like me too.” He pressed and you faltered.

What does he mean too? Does he like me? You thought trying to figure out if he was just playing games with you. Your eyes narrowed as a smirk pulled on your lips and you pulled the trigger, “I’ll take the priority registration thanks.” you say as the paintball hits him square in the chest and his black hoodie is splattered in red paint. Taehyung laughs which made you laugh too as he walked over and shook your hand. Taehyung leaned forward and whispered in your ear, “Jokes on you, I’m not even enrolling next semester. I hope you’re as good at running away from me as I am at chasing you down.” he said as he winked and left you with your mouth hanging open wondering just who the victor was in this situation.

As Taehyung walked away from you when the final maze walls fall away he waved back to you over his head without turning around, “Don’t forget to embody the holiday spirit __________.”

You blink as your friends came running and hugging you tightly congratulating you and you couldn’t help but think about what a date with Taehyung Kim would be like after all.

[equik-idol815]

2017 Top Songs List

Happy New Year everyone!  I wish you all great health, love, and luck in the new year.  2017 was a rough ride for a lot of us especially with the passing of quite a few incredible celebrities.  Overall it was a fantastic year for music.  At the end of the year I like to look back at all the great songs I’ve enjoyed.  This year I thought I would make a list of my personal favorites and share it with you all.  I first tried to do my top 15 or 20 songs but there were so many I ended up with 30.   

Top 30 Songs

Spring Day: BTS  MV 

Everyone knows BTS had an amazing 2017.  Out of all their songs this year I liked Spring Day the most.  The MV is so aesthetically pleasing and the laundry mountain was iconic.  I honestly wasn’t very much impressed with the LY: Her album songs beside the outro.  Not saying I didn’t like them I just like them less than I like their songs from earlier times.  

Please: DPR Live MV

DPR is one of the many artists I really got into this year.  I really enjoy their sound.  Christian Yu should be nominated for best glow up.  All their songs are super catchy and great to jam in the car.  This song I listened to the most and always got Dumbfoundead’s rap stuck in my head all day.  

Da Da Da: Loco ft. Hoody MV

Bleached is definitely one of the best albums this year.  Loco changed his sound a bit to me and I feel it fits him better.  It was super hard to pick one song from this album as my favorite.  

Rollin’: B1A4 MV

Rollin’ is a song I found myself singing all the time.  It got stuck in my head after just one listen.  I really feel like this song got slept on.  Best B1A4 song for a while.  The choreo is simple but just as cute and catchy.    

Gae Hwa (개화): Epik High ft. Jong Wan MV 

Epik High once again brings the best album of the year.  We’ve Done Something Wonderful is packed with 11 bone shaking tracks.  I want to say it was hard to pick a favorite here but any collaboration between Tablo and Jong Wan will always be the best. 

  Tequila: G.Soul ft. Hoody MV

My most listened to summer jam of 2017.  G. Soul and Hoody really brought the vibes.

  I Wait: Day6 MV 

Shoutout to Day6 for making a music video to every song they made this year.  That’s a huge feat while making them all great quality.  Again really hard to pick one single song but I Wait is a serious jam. 

  Today: Nell x Groovyroom MV

My favs Nell of course need to be on the list.  I’m so excited to see their work now that they are an independent label. Groovyroom is an excellent collaboration with them for an extra electric sound. 

    Hibernation: Yesung MV

What a great year for Yesung fans.  A second solo album and a suju comeback.  The original bae still looks and sounds great!

Fool: Winner MV

Winner’s four song mini comeback was nice.  I found myself singing this song often. 

  Shine Forever: Monsta X MV

Monsta X were cranking out a bunch of awesome songs and mv’s again this year.  Shine Forever stuck with me the most.  I like the celtic feel of the violin track and the beautiful mv filming. 

  Inkigayo: Changmo ft. Dok2, The Quiett MV

Best artist discovery this year is Changmo.  I really like his rap style.  He made me shuffle my list of favorite rappers.  Not to mention somehow getting nominated for a BET award.  I listened to Money Making Moment album so many times.  The bass for this song sounds so awesome in the car.  Illionaire Records was really looking up this year.  

Anti: Zico ft. G.Soul MV

Zico gave us some really nice tracks this year with Television and all the work SMTM.  Can’t go wrong with a G.Soul hook.

    Move: Taemin MV

Taemin’s move as expected is a great song made infinitely better by crazy good choreo. The duo dance version is my favorite.

   Water: Dumbfoundead ft. G.Soul MV

Dumbfoundead is such a funny guy.  I love this as another summer jam with his usual comedic twist.  Another great feature by G.Soul.

  Baby Don’t Like It: NCT 127 MV

Two really nice albums from NCT 127 this year.  Baby Don’t Like was way too adult for these babies but I can’t help enjoying it.  

Black Suit: Super Junior MV

A suju come back is always a blessing.  They all look great but can we talk about how much I love Yesung’s hairstyle?  It’s almost like a throwback style but still in fashion.  

Come Back Home Remake: BTS MV

I know I said Spring Day was my favorite BTS song this year but it’s really this song.  I just felt like it didn’t count because it’s not really their song but a remake.  I listened to this on repeat more than any other song this year.  All that Suga growling...

I I Yo: Gummy MV

It’s not a list without the ballad queen Gummy.  This song is a good mix of her serious style but not too heavy with a sort of hip hop beat.  It’s only made better by a Jaejoong cameo in the MV.  

Gajah: Dynamic Duo ft. RM MV

Also not a top list without Dynamic Duo.  They won an award for Nosedive featuring Chen but I liked Gajah a bit more.  For a while I has been wishing for a collaboration between DD and Suga but this was the next best thing for me.

  Paradise: Millic ft. Fanxy Child MV

Millic showed up strong this year.  His whole album Vida is super chill.

Outside: Crush MV

It was at the end of summer but Crush as usual brought great summer jams as well.  Outside was a really cute mv.  

Change: RM & Wale MV

Round of Applause to RM for this collaboration with Wale.  I really like the message with this song. 

  Party (Shut Down): Sik-k ft. Crush MV

Another Summer Jam.  I love the whole H.A.L.F album but this is my favorite. (The softest skrt-skrt) 

  Cave Me In: Gallant x Tablo x Eric Nam MV 

One of my other favorite songs to sing with.  I’d never heard of Gallant before this and I’ve still not listened to any of his other songs but his voice is nice.

  Iffy: Jay Park x Sik-k x pH-1 MV

I’m not sure why but this song was my go to at the gym.  The beat goes great to my elliptical pace.  

Fire Water: Code Kunst ft. Tablo, G.Soul MV

This song is right up there with Cave Me In.  I usually listened to them consecutively.  If you like this song go hear it on the whole album with the extra intro.   

Cigarette: offonoff ft. Tablo, Miso MV

Offonoff another new artist for me.  In the beginning it was hard to find this track when I couldn’t remember wether his name was onoffon or offonoff.  The album is also super chill and has more great tracks.  I’ve never heard Miso but I really enjoyed her voice.  

  Wine: Suran ft. Changmo MV

What an awesome song.  Obviously for Suran’s lovely voice and a Changmo feature but also for Suga PD.  I hope the next step here is an epic rap song between Changmo and Suga.  That would really be dream come true. 

  Money On The Floor: The Quiett ft. Changmo, Don Mills MV

The Quiett’s album is another I enjoyed this year.  This song will always have a special place for me.  My mother and I took a road trip this summer for five days and she let me be in charge of music the entire time.  I played just my whole iPod on shuffle.  I expected her to enjoy more of the ballad songs like Roy Kim or Kyuhyun but she always wanted to skip them.  This song she was nodding along to and I tried so hard not to laugh. 

Once again I wish everyone a Happy New Year.  This list I would definitely make longer with other great songs but 30 is already a lot.  Bless you if you read through this whole thing.  Here is a link to a youtube playlist I put together of all these songs.  I’ll add more to it as I see fit but I won’t list them here.   

[usatrendingsports]

Winter Olympics on Thursday: Occasions to look at, athletes, TV schedule, streaming

The bar has been set excessive, so it may not be simple to high what has gone down throughout the early stretch of this week’s Winter Olympics schedule. It was a stretch that noticed Shaun White full a gold-medal redemption arc and Mikaela Shiffrin outlast inclement climate to make her long-awaited debut on the slopes and win gold. It was additionally in that point when  Chloe Kim put her title on the map.

However don’t have any worry, there can be loads of extra pleasure on the best way from South Korea.

Good factor you landed right here, too, as a result of we have you lined with all the things you have to know forward of the motion on Thursday, Feb. 15.

First, be sure to’ve checked out our 2018 Olympics cheat sheet, after which prepare for the following full day of Winter Video games competitors with this preview of athletes and occasions to look at. NBC’s Thursday protection options all kinds of sports activities, with loads of males’s ice hockey, the lads’s skeleton and one other probability for Group USA veteran Lindsey Jacobellis to lastly take first place.

Here is the total overview for Thursday, full with a information of what and how one can watch, plus a medal tracker with updates from the earlier occasions:

Medal Tracker

Medal Tracker

PyeongChang 2018

Attempting to find a gold medal since 2006, Lindsey Jacobellis will get one other probability within the ladies’s snowboard cross. Getty Pictures

Occasions to look at

Girls’s slalom: That is what Shiffrin’s been ready for all week. Gusty winds postponed it from Sunday, after which extra inclement climate pushed it again even farther. The slalom would be the second of doubtless 5 completely different medal alternatives for the 22-year-old Group USA up-and-comer, who took gold within the large slalom on Wednesday evening. 

When: eight p.m. (first run), 11:15 p.m. (second run) (LIVE)

TV: NBC | Stream: NBCOlympics.com, fuboTV (attempt free of charge)

Girls’s snowboard cross (gold medal ultimate): A 10-time Winter X Video games champ on this occasion, Lindsey Jacobellis can be an apparent headliner as she pursues first place, which has eluded her on the Winter Olympics stage ever since her 2006 debut. Her Group USA companion, Rosie Mancari, will not take part as a consequence of accidents, whereas Britain’s Zoe Gillings-Brier, a four-time Olympian, can be within the combine on the lookout for her first-ever medal.

When: eight p.m.-12:30 a.m. ET (LIVE)

TV: NBCSN | Stream: NBCOlympics.com, fuboTV (attempt free of charge)

Males’s skeleton (gold medal ultimate): South Korea’s personal Yun Sung-Bin, the primary Korean to develop into a world champion in males’s skeleton, can be representing Pyeongchang. Matt Antoine, a bronze medal winner from 2014, leads the U.S. pack, which additionally consists of John Daly, who misplaced management of his sled on the ultimate run of his Sochi Video games effort.

When:  eight p.m.-12:30 a.m. ET (LIVE)

TV: NBC | Stream: NBCOlympics.com, fuboTV (attempt free of charge) 

Males’s ice hockey (U.S. vs. Slovakia): Group USA coughed up a lead on the final minute in a stunning time beyond regulation loss by the hands of Slovenia on Tuesday. With out lively NHL gamers for the primary time for the reason that 1990s, they want a direct turnaround — and a win streak — to completely get again on monitor.

When: 10 p.m.-12:30 a.m ET (LIVE)

TV: CNBC | Stream: NBCOlympics.com, fuboTV (attempt free of charge) 

All occasions

TV: The next channels will broadcast a wide range of Olympics occasions all through the day: NBC, NBCSN, CNBC, USA Community.

Reside stream: NBCOlympics.com and the NBC Sports activities app will mix to current greater than 1,800 hours of streaming protection, together with dwell streaming of all NBC community Primetime broadcasts. The NBC Sports activities App will current dwell streamed and on-demand protection of all competitors throughout all 15 sports activities and 102 medal occasions. It’s also possible to stream all of NBC’s protection on fuboTV (attempt free of charge). 

For a full schedule of occasions on Day Seven, click on right here.

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[pokalkalasreko]

Top 50 Singles of 2017

Hello and welcome to the third annual edition of my top singles list (2016, 2015)

I really like writing these lists and 2017 is all about doing more of the things you like and less of the things you don’t. 

Hair Down by Mollie King would have been my top song of the year, except that ultimately it just wasn’t any good. 

This year, because I’m feeling extra festive, I have made the list into an apple music playlist. 

50

Allie X – Casanova

And we’re off. This chorus has one of the best hooks of the year. 

49

Jax Jones - Breathe ft. Ina Wroldsen

Ina Wroldsen has one of my favourite voices in music. You can hear her singing backing on a lot of early songs by The Saturdays, given that she wrote most of them. First of two Jax Jones entries on the list. 

48

Yaeji - Raingurl

Yaeji is cooler than me, you, anyone you have ever met, and anyone you will ever meet. 

47

Lost Kings - Quit You ft. Tinashe

In which Tinashe controversially claims she is addicted to a Coldplay song.

46

Katy Perry - Bon Appétit ft. Migos

In 2013, Katy Perry was the biggest popstar on the planet, and I couldn’t understand why. In 2017, she releases a string of actual bops and her career is in nosedive. I’m ready to stan. 

45

Josefine Myrberg - Head over Heels

Josefine Myrberg came third in Swedish Idol back in 2014. Nobody seems to be listening to her music much these days, but Head Over Heels (7.5k views at time of writing) is a genuinely beautiful song worthy of a lot more recognition. 

44

Kehlani - Already Won

The first time I heard this I was like ‘yaaas’ all the way through. Kehlani’s autobiographical ode to her own successes is a reminder to all of us to recognise that sometimes, we have already won.

43

Sigrid Bernson - This Summer

A pop song by a Swedish woman about enjoying summer. There is nothing better. 

42

Sage the Gemini - Now & Later

Released in 2016, but reached its chart peak in 2017 so it’s allowed. Now & Later was almost my most played song of Q1 so there’s that. 

41

Gabrielle Aplin - Waking Up Slow

I’ve just discovered that a PIANO version of this song has 3x as many views on YouTube. That is criminal. This song is full of synths and it bops because of it. 

40

Stockholm Noir - Hopeless Dreams

The “Take me to the south of France, I’ll feel poor again” bit is excellent.  

39

Anitta - Paradinha

A very good friend of mine who happens to be multi-lingual informed me that this song doesn’t make any sense in about 3 different languages. Which is as ridiculous as it is iconic. 

38

Dagny - Wearing Nothing

I love the choreography in this video. Dagny is a brilliant popstar. 

37

Shania Twain - Poor Me

I wasn’t mad about the other singles Shania released as part of her comeback this year, but this hit me for real. Shania voice has changed in tone so much, and now it suits the melancholic Poor Me perfectly. 

36

Danny L Harle - 1UL

What a song. I wish the singer was credited so I could look into her other work because I think she has a very listenable voice. 

35

SOFI TUKKER - Best Friend feat. NERVO, The Knocks & Alisa Ueno

That bassline. Features galore. Nonsense lyrics. A kitchen sink bop. 

34

Dinah Nah - One More Night

Dinah Nah is an international treasure, making banger after banger for anyone who will listen. As part of the excellent Spotify for Artists year-end thing, she proudly shared that she has 894k fans in 60 countries, which is quite remarkable and warms my heart. 

33

Shakira - Coconut Tree

I liked Malibu by Miley Cyrus but I preferred Coconut Tree by Shakira. This song is truly meditative, and takes me straight to the beach. 

32

Tove Styrke - Say My Name

Ironic because I still can’t pronounce Tove’s surname. 

31

The Chainsmokers - Paris

I know it’s the Chainsmokers, but I think this song is actually very good. That final instrumental goes off. 

30

PVRIS - Winter

From Paris to PVRIS, this song has one of the biggest choruses of the year. I also love that they have called the video a “visualette” - so extra. 

29

Wiktoria - As I Lay Me Down 

Wiktoria puts in a solid effort here, pretty much yelling her way through the entire song without taking a breath and it is incredible. Bonus points for a liberal use of “HEY” noises throughout. 

28

Niall Horan - Too Much To Ask

Don’t @ me. I am the last person who would have expected to see Niall Horan anywhere near my top thousand songs of the year, but here we are. The only thing constant in life is change. 

27

Lorde - Green Light

The final chorus of Green Light was one of my defining moments of Glastonbury 2017 - genuinely euphoric. I read somewhere that Lorde uses significantly more nouns than other songwriters and that’s what makes her songs so memorable. That could be true. I haven’t counted the nouns in Green Light though but it feels like there’s a fair few.

26

Charli XCX - Out Of My Head ft. Tove Lo and ALMA

Charli XCX’s POP 2 is an absolute triumph and my album of the year. Every song has about 12 different hooks and sounds so fresh. Tove Lo and ALMA are a dream collaboration on Out Of My Head.

25

KStewart - Sex 4 Breakfast

KStewart is my favourite new artist this year, and this is the first of two singles on this list. Somebody played a ‘prank’ on me at Brighton Pride this summer, and told me KStewart was playing on the mainstage at 4pm. I was so excited and squeezed my way to the front. However, at 4pm KStewart was nowhere to be seen and, to my surprise, out walks Louisa Johnson. Good stuff. 

24

Tinashe - Flame

The nicest thing I have ever done for myself is to buy myself VIP tickets to meet Tinashe and see her perform at Koko in Camden. Here I am like a competition winner:

It feels now like she’s never going to break through into the top tier of popstars which is a shame, because I really think she has it all. 

23

IMRI – I Feel Alive

The best pop song Eurovision has had in years. Unfortunately slightly strangled by the 3 minute rule, I would take another 1 or 2 choruses at the end for good measure. Imri seems like he’s having the time of his life and that’s great to see. 

22

Loreen - Body

It took a couple of listens, but now I am completely addicted to Body, and it is pretty much on repeat whenever I am commuting. Perfect for drowning out the real world. 

21

Loop - As if

I follow Loop on Instagram and she seems great. This year she has released a bunch of breezy, refreshing electro-pop including As If. I’m hoping that 2018 is her year. 

20

Poppy - My Style (feat. Charlotte)

My Style would be right at home on Robyn’s Body Talk, which is one of the greatest albums ever. As Robyn appears to be taking some time out, I am thrilled that Poppy has stepped in with her own brand of robo-pop. 

19

Liv Lovelle - Won’t Say Too Much

For the first minute of this song I’m always like “where is this going”, and then that drop happens and it all makes sense. 

18

CNCO, Little Mix - Reggaetón Lento (Remix)

17

Kim Petras - I Don't Want It At All

More like Kim Petr-SASS 💁  I Don’t Want it At All is the ultimate ode to materialism and an absolute stomper.

16

Nicki Minaj - Regret In Your Tears

I feel like Nicki Minaj is too often overlooked as a popstar who sings. Regret In Your Tears is an understated jam, and she sounds great.  

15

Astrid S - Breathe

Exactly what a pop song should sound like. I had a flatmate this year and we had nothing at all in common, apart from the we both listened to Astrid S. The power of pop music to build bridges.

14

Kelela - LMK

Kelela was one artist who made me genuinely excited about music this year. Her album Take Me Apart is exquisite, sounding both fresh and nostalgic at the same time. LMK is one of the best.

13

KStewart - Hands feat. Yungen

If there were any justice, this would have been huge for KStewart. But there isn’t and here it sits with less than 50k(!) views on YouTube. Hands is completely radio-ready, and could be lifted off any Ariana album.

12

Rita Ora - Anywhere

Rita Ora has had an incredible year. I love that she hosted America’s Next Top Model, then sacked it in and had 3 huge top 10s, which is probably more than your fave. Anywhere was instant for me, and her best by a long way. The nonsense post-chorus is reminiscent of those early 00s garage classics. Rita herself has said that it has no meaning, and I hope that in 2018 we are able to enjoy more songs with no meaning whatsoever. 

11

Dua Lipa - New Rules

Well this one took off didn’t it. Dua’s meteoric rise has been so exciting to watch, and it was New Rules that really took it there. She just seems like a great person too, and I’m sure 2018 will belong to Dua. Another lesson in the power of a good music video to rocket launch a song’s success. 

10

Aly & AJ - I Know

This song is just so perfect. The return of Aly & AJ has been the most welcome surprise. I Know is cool, lazy, atmospheric, synth-pop and a major shift from their 2007 Disney days.

9

Tove Lo - Disco Tits

I said this when I wrote about Cool Girl last year, but it’s worth repeating that Tove Lo makes it seem so effortless. Disco Tits is amazing and I wouldn’t be surprised if she wrote it in her sleep. 

8

Little Mix - Power ft. Stormzy

Little Mix are just unstoppable. Every year I think they have reached their zenith and then they take it to another level. Power is single number four from their fourth album and it’s this good. By now, Jesy Nelson (the best one) knows her way around an iconic second verse, so I think it’s neat that this time her verse starts with “my turn”. Also - what a video. Well done everyone. 

7

Jax Jones - Instruction ft. Demi Lovato, Stefflon Don

"All my ladies” was THE call to action this summer. What a song. 

6

Carly Rae Jepsen - Cut To The Feeling

Carly Rae Jepsen has mastered the ability to make happy sounding music which suddenly hits you as heartbreaking once you get stuck into the lyrics. Cut To The Feeling was released about a week after the Manchester attacks, and for me, the line “I want to play where you play with the angels, I want to wake up with you in tangles” stuck out as truly devastating among the euphoric, soaring synths. 

5

Blessed - See Through All The Colours 

I’m obsessed with Blessed. See Through All The Colours is so huge and I really thought would have been their breakthrough. Unfortunately it wasn’t to be, but I think watch this space. Very excited to see what they bring in 2018. 

4

Nadine Coyle - Go To Work

One of the best things about 2017 has been seeing the true joy that Nadine Coyle, gets from being a popstar, and equally, the true joy she took from the really quite lukewarm reception of Go To Work. Earlier in the year, Nadine made a surprise appearance at a popular London club night to sing a couple of choruses of Go To Work (she didn’t even stay long enough to take her coat off). I was living in those few minutes. 

3

Mirela - Contigo

This song was the runner up in the Spanish pre-selection show for Eurovision, and won the televote by a landslide, but was struck down by some bizarre jury voting rules. It’s basically incredible. It’s ridiculous, it’s trashy, it’s fun. Bai-la-la-la-UH. 

2

Katy Perry - Swish Swish ft. Nicki Minaj

I know. A basic bop if ever there was one, but no song this year has bopped as hard as Swish Swish. I spent my entire time at Glastobury telling anyone who would listen that I only came to watch Katy Perry do Swish Swish. Everyone thought I was joking. I’m still undecided on that music video, and that dance, but the song is brilliant.

1

Steps - Scared Of The Dark

Let’s be honest, Steps in 2017 could have been shit but instead they were amazing. The moment when this sat at number 1 on iTunes ahead of chart villain Ed Sheeran was a sweet piece of pop justice. Scared of the Dark is a banger, incredibly good pop music, and my top single of the year. 

[mendooutdoors]

New Post has been published on Men Do Outdoors

New Post has been published on https://mendooutdoors.com/17-snowboarding-facts/

17 Snowboarding Facts Which Will Blow Your Mind

Winter is coming and there is only one thing better than hitting up the slopes with your trusty board, crew, and of course the fresh pow.

That thing is a beer and being equipped with an arsenal of snowboarding facts that will make your buddies envious of your knowledge.

Chow down on these gems and make sure to share them with your buddies.

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Snowboarding Facts

#Snowboarding was called Snurfing

You read that right. Snowboarding was invented in 1960 by an engineer living in Muskegon, Michigan who went by the name of Sherman Poppen.

He strapped two ski’s together and used rope for steering.

Needless to say, the fellow looked like he was surfing and so the wife blessed the act with the name Snurfing which combined the words ‘Snow’ and ‘Surfing’.

Luckily for us, other snowboarding companies such as Burton saw the potential of the sport and made it more desirable by changing up the board which leaves us with the design that we use today.

#Snowboarding is less dangerous than Skiing

facts.net

It is difficult to think of skiing as a sport that can be more dangerous than snowboarding.

Considering that there are more young males showing off and doing dumb shit, but the fact remains that yes, people on skis are more likely to get hurt.

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Which sport do you prefer? Snowboarding or Skiing Leave a comment below and tell us why you like that sport more

Safety always comes first, going snowboarding in that case. #snowboarding #snowboardClick to Tweet

If you are a beginner in snowboarding, make sure to read this article so that you can reduce your chances of broken wrists, shoulders and collar bones.

The best thing is once you learn a simple trick you will immediately know what not to do in the future to prevent major injuries.

# Snowboarding was actually banned at resorts in the early 1980’s

Kind of hard to believe these days that snowboarding could be banned but back in the day, skiing targetted the older demographic, whereas snowboarding was looked at as being for the youth.

Because of that, it was more dangerous and a “teenage fad”.

Needless to say, that is now history.

The first resort to open up for snowboarding was Stratton Mountain Resort in Vermont in 1983-84 and because of that, this resort is still very popular for snowboarders.

Also was a great move as these days 30%+ of all winter sports revenue comes from snowboarding, which is pretty neat.

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#The most flips on a snowboard in a single jump was 4

That would equate to 360+360+360+360 = 1440 No matter how you look at it, that is amazing.

Now that is amazing but when you think about the huge amount of hours, snowboarding gear and training that went into preparing for the feat, it then becomes mind-blowingly impressive.

What’re the most flips you ever have done? Comment below

#Snowboarding became a Winter Olympic sport

“Wow. No shit. Tell me something I don’t know” said pretty much, everyone.

Well, it was first introduced in the 1998 Winter Olympic games in Nagano, Japan.

For many of us, we probably won’t make it to the Olympics for snowboarding, but if you are seeking the thrill of hitting the slopes in competitions than you have to check out these snowboarding games.

Definitely isn’t the same feeling but at least you can do 1440 and realize how crazily difficult that really is.

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#Shaun White won the most x games medals which were the total of 16

ozy.com

#The youngest X-Games medal winner was Chloe Kim at the young age of 14

#There are six competition venues at the X Games: Slopestyle, Street, Snowmobile, X Course, SuperPipe and Big Air.

#2011 marked the most-watched Winter X Games ever, with 114,200 people in attendance and 39.7 million tuning in from home during the four-day event

Enjoying the super interesting snowboarding Facts? Make sure to comment your favourite ones below

#The first Olympic medal for snowboarding almost went up in smoke!

The first Olympic gold medal in snowboarding was won by Ross Rebagliati of Canada.

After he won he got temporarily disqualified as he tested positive for marijuana in his blood.

Needless to say, the disqualification got overturned and he smoked a joint after to celebrate his victory.

He literally became an advocate for medicinal marijuana and owns his own medicinal marijuana dispensary these days.

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#1498 shredding Bikini’s

In 2017, 1498 snowboard enthusiasts hit up the slopes at the Sheregesh ski resort, located in the heart of Siberia to break a world record of the most snowboarders dressed in Bikini’s shredding the slopes.

They were able to beat the previous record of by a massive 387 people.

The snow was crispy, the temperature was only 12 degrees Celcius (53.6F) but for some reason, it was still steamy on the slopes.

#$31,313.13 

vintagewinter.com

That is the price of the most expensive snowboard ever sold.

It was the 1977 Burton Experimental Prototype and was sold on eBay on July 1, 2014.

Would you ever consider buying a board that expensive?

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#27.4% injuries during the Olympics

Winter Olympics, in general, ends up with a bigger list of injuries than the summer sports.

But when it comes to snowboarding 27.4% of all it’s athletes walk off with some sort of an injury.

That is 1 in ever 4 contestants push themselves past their limits.

(source: British journal of sports medicine) How do you like those odds.

#1 hour of snowboarding is equivalent to 3 beers

If you decided to snowboard for an hour you could lose upwards of 450 calories, which in turn would be equivalent to 3 beers.

This means if you want to get properly wasted and not put on the extra pounds, all you have to do is snowboard between 3-4 hours (we don’t actually recommend getting drunk)

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#Shredding the Pipe on fresh Pow

Snowboarding has its own unique community that some say is one of the best in the world, and with the community, there is also a very radical and interesting lingo that has been created.

Luckily it’s super easy to pick up and best of all being a young sport, there is plenty of opportunities to create your very own words that could get mixed into the language.

Heading off to Shrepp, cya in a few days time #snowboarding #snowboardClick to Tweet

So how about Shrepp (shredding the pipe) Do you think it could take off?

#It’s a Man’s Sport

The population of snowboarders is dominated by 73.1% being under the age of 25 and 51.7% of snowboarders are under the age of 17.

Also, 74.2% of snowboarders are male.

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#The Biggest Trick of 2017

In 2017 a Japanese snowboarder by the name of Yuki Kadano was able to pull off a quad jump “the Backside Quad 1980°” which is now the biggest rotation ever performed on a snowboard.

If you are on your way to doing 1980 then make sure to check out how to jump on a snowboard to get the basics which will allow you to conquer the jump faster.

So those are the top 17 interesting snowboarding facts that I could find online after scouring for hours.

Now it’s your turn to share some snowboarding facts

Do you have any amazing snowboarding facts I could add to this page?

let me know in the comments below.

If you enjoyed these facts make sure to share this article with friends and family on Facebook and Instagram

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17 Snowboarding Facts Which Will Blow Your Mind

Winter is coming and there is only one thing better than hitting up the slopes with your trusty board, crew, and of course the fresh pow. That thing is a beer and being equipped with an arsenal of snowboarding facts that will make your buddies envious of your knowledge.

Chow down on these gems and make sure to share them with your buddies.

Snowboarding Facts

#Snowboarding was called Snurfing

You read that right. Snowboarding was invented in 1960 by an engineer living in Muskegon, Michigan who went by the name of Sherman Poppen. He strapped two ski’s together and used rope for steering.

Needless to say, the fellow looked like he was surfing and so the wife blessed the act with the name Snurfing which combined the words ‘Snow’ and ‘Surfing’.

Luckily for us, other snowboarding companies such as Burton saw the potential of the sport and made it more desirable by changing up the board which leaves us with the design that we use today.

#Snowboarding is less dangerous than Skiing

It is difficult to think of skiing as a sport that can be more dangerous than snowboarding.

Considering that there are more young males showing off and doing dumb shit, but the fact remains that yes, people on skis are more likely to get hurt.

facts.net

Which sport do you prefer? Snowboarding or Skiing

Leave a comment below and tell us why you like that sport more

If you are a beginner in snowboarding, make sure to read this article so that you can reduce your chances of broken wrists, shoulders and collar bones. The best thing is once you learn a simple trick you will immediately know what not to do in the future to prevent major injuries.

# Snowboarding was actually banned at resorts in the early 1980’s

Kind of hard to believe these days that snowboarding could be banned but back in the day, skiing targetted the older demographic, whereas snowboarding was looked at as being for the youth.

Because of that, it was more dangerous and a “teenage fad”. Needless to say, that is now history. The first resort to open up for snowboarding was Stratton Mountain Resort in Vermont in 1983-84 and because of that, this resort is still very popular for snowboarders.

Also was a great move as these days 30%+ of all winter sports revenue comes from snowboarding, which is pretty neat.

#The most flips ever done on a snowboard in a single jump was 4

That would equate to 360+360+360+360 = 1440

No matter how you look at it, that is amazing.

Now that is amazing but when you think about the huge amount of hours, snowboarding gear and training that went into preparing for the feat, it then becomes mind-blowingly impressive.

What’re the most flips you ever have done? Comment below

#Snowboarding became a Winter Olympic sport

“Wow. No shit. Tell me something I don’t know” said pretty much, everyone.

Well, it was first introduced in the 1998 Winter Olympic games in Nagano, Japan.

For many of us, we probably won’t make it to the Olympics for snowboarding, but if you are seeking the thrill of hitting the slopes in competitions than you have to check out these snowboarding games.

Definitely isn’t the same feeling but at least you can do 1440 and realize how crazily difficult that really is.

ozy.com

#Shaun White won the most x games medals which were the total of 16

#The youngest X-Games medal winner was Chloe Kim at the young age of 14

#There are six competition venues at the X Games: Slopestyle, Street, Snowmobile, X Course, SuperPipe and Big Air.

#2011 marked the most-watched Winter X Games ever, with 114,200 people in attendance and 39.7 million tuning in from home during the four-day event

Enjoying the super interesting snowboarding Facts? Make sure to comment your favourite ones below

#The first Olympic medal for snowboarding almost went up in smoke!

The first Olympic gold medal in snowboarding was won by Ross Rebagliati of Canada. After he won he got temporarily disqualified as he tested positive for marijuana in his blood.

Needless to say, the disqualification got overturned and he smoked a joint after to celebrate his victory.

He literally became an advocate for medicinal marijuana and owns his own medicinal marijuana dispensary these days.

#1498 shredding Bikini’s

In 2017, 1498 snowboard enthusiasts hit up the slopes at the Sheregesh ski resort, located in the heart of Siberia to break a world record of the most snowboarders dressed in Bikini’s shredding the slopes. They were able to beat the previous record of by a massive 387 people.

The snow was crispy, the temperature was only 12 degrees Celcius (53.6F) but for some reason, it was still steamy on the slopes.

vintagewinter.com

#$31,313.13 

That is the price of the most expensive snowboard ever sold. It was the 1977 Burton Experimental Prototype and was sold on eBay on July 1, 2014

Would you ever consider buying a board that expensive?

#27.4% injuries during the Olympics

Winter Olympics, in general, ends up with a bigger list of injuries than the summer sports. But when it comes to snowboarding 27.4% of all it’s athletes walk off with some sort of an injury.

That is 1 in ever 4 contestants push themselves past their limits.  (source: British journal of sports medicine)

How do you like those odds.

#1 hour of snowboarding is equivalent to 3 beers

If you decided to snowboard for an hour you could lose upwards of 450 calories, which in turn would be equivalent to 3 beers.

This means if you want to get properly wasted and not put on the extra pounds, all you have to do is snowboard between 3-4 hours (we don’t actually recommend getting drunk)

#Shredding the Pipe on fresh Pow

Snowboarding has its own unique community that some say is one of the best in the world, and with the community, there is also a very radical and interesting lingo that has been created.

Luckily it’s super easy to pick up and best of all being a young sport, there is plenty of opportunities to create your very own words that could get mixed into the language.

So how about Shrepp (shredding the pipe) Do you think it could take off?

#It’s a Man’s Sport

The population of snowboarders is dominated by 73.1% being under the age of 25 and 51.7% of snowboarders are under the age of 17. Also, 74.2% of snowboarders are male.

#The Biggest Trick of 2017

In 2017 a Japanese snowboarder by the name of Yuki Kadano was able to pull off a quad jump “the Backside Quad 1980°” which is now the biggest rotation ever performed on a snowboard.

If you are on your way to doing 1980 then make sure to check out how to jump on a snowboard to get the basics which will allow you to conquer the jump faster.

So those are the top 17 interesting snowboarding facts that I could find online after scouring for hours.

Now it’s your turn to share some snowboarding facts

Do you have any amazing snowboarding facts I could add to this page? let me know in the comments below. If you enjoyed these facts make sure to share this article with friends and family on Facebook and Instagram

Featured Image: Action-outdoors