#mo jihye x reader

[earlysunshines]

just pretend(?)

danielle marsh x fem!reader ; angst, fluff

synopsis: your coworker can’t seem to fall out of love with you so you convince your best friend to fake date you. sometimes the “fake” seems a little too real.

warnings: PINING!!! ; danielle is touchy and wonderful and reader is a mess ; kinda all over the place?? I'm also a bit iffy ab the pacing on this one ; bit of angst near the end ; alcohol ; anything else not mentioned ; not proofread… none of my fics are…

a/n: this is based off my life rn bc my friend and i r literally fake dating so my coworker can stop being in love w me and i just HAD to turn this into a fic like what (but most of this is exaggerated ofc esp the whole coworker thing I made her a little over the top on purpose for the plotLOL)

"absolutely not." hanni looks disgusted, almost appalled with that stupid expression on her face. “you’re crazy.”

"please, i'll pay you." you beg, clasping your hands together and giving her your best puppy eyes.

"you're going to scare the hoes away... no, no, and no.”

"what ‘hoes’ hanni? when is the last time you've talked to a girl." you groan and pinch the bridge of your nose.

she sticks her tongue out at you, then responds, “you wouldn’t know…”

“dumbass the only reason i’m begging is because women do want me. please, it’s not going to be serious or anything—“

“i don’t care, the answer is no. ask someone else!”

you’re currently perched on the edge of your best friend's bed, practically begging for help. you seem to have a knack for attracting the strangest types of people, and this time, it’s your coworker who’s got severe attachment issues and an unhealthy level of codependency. all you wanted was a paycheck and simplicity, but now you find yourself in a situation you never asked for.

your best friend groans again, “you and your flirting… it gets you into this shit time and time again and the way you act… you know what you’re doing.”

“what?”

“shut up, you act gay and you know people fall for that. i’m not gonna help you because you want to be an asshole, if you could just be normal for once—“

“fuck you.” you flop onto her bed, shutting your eyes and rubbing your face. “i’m just nice and it’s fun to flirt! it’s nothing. i flirt with my friends and you all the time, they’re fine with it.”

“that’s because they’re straight, y/n. gay people are very vulnerable – except me.”

“you would know.” you retort, earning a glare from hanni. “who the hell do i ask then?”

“haerin?”

“she wouldn’t.”

“yunjin?”

“we don’t match, plus, she dates around.”

“sakura?”

“edating someone right now, some girl in france?”

“the hell?”

“i know.” you sigh louder and hanni just looks at you with slight, playful disgust. “what do i do.” you flop your hands onto the mattress and stare up. “dude, she’s too obsessed, i’m flattered because i mean, maybe i’m attractive and whatnot but this is just–”

“--delusion at its peak.” hanni clicks her tongue, now smiling at you; an idea pops up in your best friend's big head. you turn to face her, raising a brow. “how about dani? she’s literally perfect.”

danielle marsh is perfect, that’s the problem.

she’s a biology major whose ipad pro notes are so neat and pleasing to the eye that they genuinely keep you awake at night – most of it being because you’re leeching off her, but they’re so neat it really has you thinking how she does it all. 

to make things even more bewildering (and impressive), she’s one of two people you know – you’re unsure whether your cousin hyein counts, high school is nothing compared to what you endure – who manages to get at least eight hours of sleep daily. in contrast, everyone else in your circle, including yourself, is barely hanging on by a thread. 

yet, danielle seems to have cracked the code. she even finds time to volunteer at the library where she works, making you wonder if she’s some sort of extraordinary being. her ability to balance everything so effortlessly leaves you in awe, often questioning if she’s even real considering how remarkable she is.

the worst part is that she’s your best friend, right after hanni, and the person you’ve been crushing on since your first semester of university. 

it’s impossible not to have a crush on her—she’s gorgeous, sweet, and embodies everything you could ever want and more. she’s captivating, and every time you see her she flashes that stupid, adorable smile that makes your heart do a flip regardless of how many times you’ve convinced yourself that she’s unattainable and that there’s no way and that you don’t even like her and–

“i couldn’t.” you shut hanni down, quick. “she’s… you know.”

hanni furrows both brows, turning her head. “she’s what?”

“you know.” you make some strange gesture with your hands that only confuse hanni further. 

“i don’t, just fake date her.”

“she wouldn’t agree.”

“sure she would, let me call her!”

you shoot up and look at hanni with an expression that screams ‘are you out of your mind?’ as she finds danielle’s contact on her phone. 

before you can stop her, you hear a ringing sound and feel your body give up. hanni grins at you when danielle picks up five seconds later, both of you hearing a friendly, “hi!” as you back away from her.

“hey mo dani!” hanni greets, giving you a shit eating smirk. “miss l/n has a question for you.”

“she’s with you?” danielle’s voice is sweet like honey even from the phone. “hi!”

“hey!” you greet a little awkwardly, glaring at hanni. 

“y/n was wondering if you could date her.” 

eyes widening, you leap and grab the phone from hanni immediately, sputtering out jumbles of words nervously, “n-no! i mean, yeah… but not for real.” 

“oh,” you hear danielle respond lowly from the end of the phone. “wait, i’m confused.”

hanni watches you close your eyes tightly, clearly flustered and thrown off by her little antics. 

“y/n came over to ask me to date her, not actually, but just like, pretend.” hanni explains, “her coworker is still in love with her.”

“sarah?” you hear from the other end of the phone. “i thought you rejected her like, three months ago.”

“i did, but she’s still… ugh.” you flop onto the bed again and danielle hears hanni laughing in the background. “she’s still stuck on me i think, i don’t know, she’s been so…”

“if it’ll stop bothering you then i’ll help!”

“you will?” you respond, shocked. hanni mouths an i told you, then gets shoved. 

“yeah! i don’t want my best friend being so bothered, it must make you uncomfy too, right? working with someone who likes you?”

you start to wonder if danielle would be uncomfortable in a similar situation, maybe in one where she’s friends with someone who likes her, but she’s unaware of that. you shake your head, clearing your mind and staying present.

“kind of, it’s just… extra stress.”

“okay, then let’s date!” she beams, you can picture her eyes scrunching and smile growing. you want to die (affectionate) just thinking of it. “this should be fun!”

“thanks for helping out dani, thanks so much. i’ll let you be, okay? gotta go um… run errands.” 

“alright! just text me, bye, love you.” the call ends and you sigh again, feeling yourself sink deeper into hanni’s sheets.

hanni is very much your mortal enemy, she still doesn’t know why you’re so distraught because of danielle. whatever the reason may be, it makes her cackle next to you.

–

it’s nine in the morning, you didn’t have time to pregame the lecture on microbiology with at least three shots of espresso, and you’re yawning as you leave the room.

you hear your name being called out and turn to see no one other than the feeling of hot chocolate on a cold, snowy day turned into a person walking towards you – danielle.

“hey! hi.” she greets, smiling wide. her hair is clipped up and small strands of her hair stick out cutely. “hey baby.” 

you almost choke. “what?”

“did you forget we’re dating now?”

“oh.” dating, but is it even that if it’s not real? “um, hey babe?” it comes out uncertain and danielle laughs.

“wow, you suck at this – it’s okay, we’ll work on it.” she giggles, then links her arms with you. “let’s go get coffee, i need it in my system right now. oh my god, it’s our first date!”

laughing to hopefully fade away all signs of being flustered to oblivion, you tighten your arm that’s locked with hers. “right, yeah.”

you’re going on a ‘date’ with the prettiest girl on campus, she’s paying for your iced americano with oat milk splashed into it, and she’s smiling at you like you’re laughter in the rain. this can’t be good for you, it can’t be — it’s not. you wonder whether this will be worth it in the end because your coworker doesn’t even know about any of it.

(yet.)

–

before your next shift with your delusional coworker, you and danielle have already conjured up a storyline and backstory for your whole arrangement.

you two conversed for an hour after walking towards the park near her apartment and sitting down next to each other on the swings like kids. danielle was giggling and you were smiling at how charming she looked. unfortunately, you found yourself falling even harder for her just from making up the whole fake story.

danielle suggested keeping it simple, but cute: you two met at the library she worked at, you found her cute and exchanged numbers, went on a few dates, and have been girlfriends for nearly two months.

“but i literally told sarah that i wasn’t looking for anything.” you explain, sighing as you kick the mulch on the ground. that’s what you had said, but what you meant was that you’ve been looking for danielle the whole time. “she won’t believe it.”

“well,” danielle gives you a cheeky look and giggles. “i managed to charm you in a way that pushed that whole idea aside. that’s not too unbelievable, right?” she winks at you and you feel your heart stop momentarily.

you scoff playfully and snicker, “oh shut up.”

“it’s part of the story! are you saying i have no charm…”

she has too much charm. 

“dani, you’re such a dork.”

“a dork that caught your heart! i think this story is perfect.”

pushing aside the slight ache in your heart and the flush in your cheeks, the two of you formulate a first date story: you took her out bowling, where you lost terribly to her (danielle insisted this detail had to be included), and then you both had dessert together at your place. 

it’s not a terrible story, not at all. even hanni would be impressed, but you’re not going to tell her because she’d tease you both relentlessly, and you’re not sure your heart could handle that.

–

danielle walks you into work holding your hand, your coworker, sarah, watches the whole thing.

a pretty girl (pretty is an understatement in your opinion) smiles at you while walking you in, she’s telling you about the little kids she read to the other day and you can’t help but marvel at the excitement coursing through her.

she drops you off near the register right before the small ‘employees only’ sign, then holds both of your hands and looks at you like you’re a flower that’s just bloomed beautifully.

she pauses, observing you closely, then smiles wider. “okay, i’ll get going sweetheart.” the pet name makes you swallow subtly. “have fun at work!”

she takes her hands away from yours, making your skin feel a little colder. “bye, see you.”

danielle glances at your coworker, who’s looking at her with something mixed with confusion, anger, and a hint of disgust. she then looks back at you – a better sight in her opinion – smiling and waving once more before walking away.

you stay there, frozen for a few seconds, before walking behind the counter and setting your bag down.

as you grab your apron, you catch sarah in your peripheral and turn to greet her. “oh, hey.”

“who was that?” she asks immediately. “what’s up with the ‘sweetheart?’”

you grin as while tightening the lace of your apron, then respond, “my girlfriend.” and it feels wonderful rolling off your tongue.

“what? i thought you didn’t want anything?”

“you still in love with me or something?”

she feels her throat dry as she looks at you pat down your apron. “w-what?” she stutters, shaking her head. “no, why would i be…” her tone isn’t convincing, and neither is she when she adds, “it’s just… what’s with the change of heart?”

“she’s really charming,” the thought of danielle begging you to mention that makes you blush. “i like her a lot.”

sarah fights back a frown, instead, her lips twitch into a forced smile as she walks past you to tend to a customer.

–

danielle picks you up from work just to tighten the knot, and sarah also witnesses all of it.

both you and your coworker get off at closing, and after locking the doors, you run into danielle. 

she’s standing outside in a baby tee and jeans, a cap perched jauntily on her head. the moment she sees you, her face lights up into a pretty smile, and you instinctively return it. she rushes over, wrapping her arms around you in a warm hug. as she pulls back, she scans you with a playful yet affectionate gaze, her eyes lingering on you with a mixture of admiration and curiosity.

“sweetheart! i missed you.”

“i missed you too dani– baby…” you mutter the last part shyly, making danielle giggle. “you came? it’s late.”

“i wanted to pick you up, can your girlfriend not do that?”

it still sends a shiver down your spine – hearing danielle call you that. you rub the back of your neck and look away nervously, then respond, “of course not, i’m just surprised.”

sarah looks at the two of you, scoffing under her breath. danielle hears it, turning to look at her and grin, raising her brows along with it before meeting you again. she places a hand on your shoulder, then mumbles, “well, hanni called us over, i wanted to scoop you.”

“ohhh,” it makes sense now, she wouldn’t willingly pick you up just because of the whole ‘fake dating’ thing, there had to be a motive. “alright. i can drive? if you’d like, you know. you must be tired from work too.”

“aw, you’d do that?”

“i um,” you cough, avoiding her eyes again because she’s making you feel all flustered without doing much. “yeah, it’s nothing… baby…”

she grabs your hand, fingers intertwining before dragging you along to her small suv, then handing you her keys. 

your coworker groans now that you two are further, narrowing her eyes at danielle when she turns back not so subtly to make sure sarah is looking. any normal person would back off, getting the hint that the person they want is unavailable, but sarah sees it as a challenge, somehow.

there’s nothing she can’t achieve when she puts her mind to it, that’s her mindset.

you’re oblivious to how insane she is, too clouded with how touchy and giggly danielle is after the whole interaction when teh two of you get in the car.

–

danielle sits besides you on hanni’s couch, leaning against you a bit. “yeah, she gave me a glare, it was kind of funny.”

“pftt– i guess it’s working then?” hanni asks, walking over to hand you two juice from her fridge. danielle takes it happily and it makes you smile a little. 

“i hope so.” you sip on your peach juice. “but she’s like, clinically insane.”

“is she?” danielle questions, tilting her head as her hand finds its way to your bicep. you blush.

“dude, she was crazy.” hanni rubs her temple. “like, oh my god, she was going insane for a good while because y/n didn’t want her like that. i saw their messages and–”

“okay i’ll tell the story thank you.” you scoff. “she’s really competitive, and i guess new to romance? considering how she reacted i don’t know, she’s very…”

“sensitive?” danielle asks – you shake your head.

“i mean no, but kind of. she would get jealous over me really easily and was kind of codependent, like everything i do affects her or something. i’d just go on my day, but she’d always be so reliant on me and text me so often and i just… it’s so much.”

“ah, i see. how long has it been since you rejected her?”

“a few months. i thought she stopped liking me since it’s been so long, but lately there’s been tension and she’s looking at me how she used to…” hanni listens closely as she watches you rub your forehead, looking a little distraught. “i just, oh my god she has terrible attachment issues it’s concerning. the only thing i could think of was pretending to date someone.”

danielle nods in understanding.

“yeah, one time i went to see y/n at work and she looked so like… hostile. that’s not normal, we’re visibly friends.” hanni adds.

you know the exact afternoon that it happened, what hanni mentioned that is. 

she had pulled up to drop something off, and you teasingly flirted with her, hugging her as thanks. afterward, you rang up one of her orders and played with her fingers, a little habit you had developed to annoy her. despite the evident look of disgust and annoyance on hanni’s face, your coworker—who allegedly liked you a bit too much—looked like hanni had just slapped you in the face or spat at you.

long story short, hanni glanced over to see the coworker glaring at her menacingly. in response, hanni poked at you once more before hurrying out with a latte in her hand, confused and slightly terrified.

“yeah she’s… got a bitch face.”

“it’s not normal to glare at people that simply interact with your coworker…” danielle mumbles. “i’m sorry to hear that.”

you wave your hand, giggling lightly. “it’s nothing, really. i mean, i just don’t want her to be so obsessed and stuck on me, i think us pretending to date should tame the fire.”

pretending. 

the word makes both you and danielle tense up.

–

you clock in again, greeting sarah. 

she smiles brightly at you, waving and you have to make a little gesture to remind her there’s a customer in line. sarah turns away bashfully, then takes the man’s order with a hint of attitude. you’re not very fond of that.

he orders an americano, so you immediately get to work, weighing out grinds of espresso, tamping it down, and pulling two shots. as you do so, sarah pulls up next to you and nudges your shoulder.

“hey,”

“hi.” you respond, not looking up from the cup in your hand. “did you need something?”

“that t-shirt looks good on you, have you been working out?”

you feel uneasy the moment she says it, swallowing a lump in your throat. you pour the two shots over the hot water and force a response, “thanks, and um, no.” before calling out the order.

sarah continues to watch you closely as you throw away the used espresso, then says, “your girlfriend didn’t drop you?”

“she’s working.”

“right. i’d find a way to drop off my girlfriend anytime that i could.”

“good for you?” you look her in the eye again, clenching your jaw. 

“you don’t post her much on your socials either, are you guys really a thing?”

fuck. 

you scoff, “what kind of question is that? of course… i just… don’t post much. we’re still kind of new to this.”

“right, she’s not even your lockscreen.”

“i’m going to grab some beans from the back,” you interrupt, redirecting the conversation away from the topic of your alleged girlfriend. sarah narrows her eyes at you as you turn away from her, stepping away and disappearing towards the storage area.

once you’re alone, you sigh and pinch the bridge of your nose, feeling the weight of the strange interrogation settle on you. there was an unmistakable hostility in sarah’s tone, a sharp edge that cut through the air. hanni’s right, she always is. the mere thought of enduring six more hours with sarah makes you want to crawl into a hole. her jealousy is palpable, and it eats away at you, gnawing at your nerves.

you pull out your phone and quickly dial danielle, pacing back and forth as you wait for her to pick up.

“hello?” she responds less than ten seconds later. “what’s up?”

“she’s catching on, kind of. i think she’s jealous.” 

“sarah?”

“yes.” you groan, then lean your back against the wall. “i can’t work like this.”

“i’ll come over? do you need me to?”

“no, but can we meet after? i think we need to be more public, if that’s okay.”

you hear her confusion through the phone. “what? public?”

“like, soft launch or something. i just need to make it obvious that i’m quote on quote dating someone – you. and we need a lockscreen together.”

a giggle is heard on the other end of the line, “oh wow.” danielle mumbles teasingly, “this is pretty serious.”

“i hope i die.”

“aw, don’t say that babe. just come over to the library after, okay? good luck on your shift! i have to clock in soon too.”

“can we meet at my place?”

“anything is fine, that’s alright.”

“i literally owe you my first born, dani.”

“it’s nothing, this is quite entertaining.” she says, and you smile with the phone at your ear. “call me later, okay? send me updates.” 

“right, yeah.” you almost whisper, “thank you.”

“it’s nothing, sweetheart.” her laugh is infused into the sentence, making your chest burn.

–

“this is so dumb.” 

you are so dumb. this isn’t helping your case.

hanni and minji are fighting back laughter while you try to naturally rest your hand on danielles knuckles. you’re stiff and it looks anything but natural. 

the angle you take the picture at makes it look awkward, and the picture’s quality sucks too. 

“just relax.” danielle says, then holds your hand instead. “here, let me take the picture.”

you’re trying to keep your cool while minji and hanni watch and danielle, the prettiest girl you know, holds your hand and scoots closer to you in order to ‘soft launch’ your fraud of a relationship. her hand is nice in yours, her skin is soft, and she’s so close you can smell the vanilla fragrance she uses. 

danielle snaps a quick picture, then the rest of the bunch – including you – scoot over to look at the picture.

“well would you look at that! it’s perfect.” danielle beams, grinning at her work. “post that one.”

“holy shit.” minji says in awe. “no yeah, you could fool me with that.”

“anyone could fool you, dumbass.” you snicker, looking up at her and smirking.

“i hate you.”

“oh, i guess you don’t want free food from my work…?” 

minji groans, making you laugh. 

danielle’s hand is still in yours, you don’t fully register it until you realize you need both hands to post a picture on your instagram story. she seems a bit disappointed when you let go, though you barely notice – and even if you did, you might just chalk it up to your imagination.

it's fun, no doubt about it. yet, you can’t help but wonder what it would be like to take pictures of you and danielle that aren’t staged or orchestrated. you long for authenticity, capturing moments that are mundane and candid.

the thought lingers in your mind the whole time, even as you pose with your back to the camera, pretending to cook alongside danielle. it's all set up and artificial, every movement planned out, yet danielle starts giggling and leaning into you – a spontaneous gesture not part of your last-minute brainstorming. 

her laughter is genuine, her touch warm, and it makes you wonder if maybe, just maybe, not everything is as fake as it seems.

–

you wake up from your nap and groan as your ringtone renders you awake. blindly, you slap your hand in every direction on the bed until you feel it under your other pillow. someone’s calling you, that’s all you can make out since there’s a red and green circle. 

tiredly, you mumble, “hello?”

“hi! are you busy?” it’s danielle’s voice responding, shaking you awake. 

“oh, um, no.” you say as you sit up slowly, rubbing your eyes and running a hand through your hair. “are you okay? did something happen?”

“i’m fine! i was just wondering if you were free. you sound tired, were you sleeping?”

“i just took a power nap that’s all. what was it that you need?”

“oh, sorry to wake you.”

“it’s fine, seriously.” 

“well,” she starts, “i was just wondering if you wanted to go out together?”

“oh, me?”

you hear her giggle through the phone and smile softly. “i mean, i am calling y/n, aren’t i?”

“yeah, you are.”

“and i’m asking you, my girlfriend, to hangout. it’s like a date!”

“we’re not actually dating danielle, you don’t have to pretend when we’re calling and alone.” you say quietly, pursing your lips.

it’s not that you hate it, danielle being all lovely and playing the role of your girlfriend too well. the thing is, it feels like you’re getting led on, and the way she is just gives you false hope to something real.

danielle feels a little ache in her heart when you respond like that, but she pushes it away for the time being.

“i don’t mind it, it’s fun!” she beams. “anyway, there’s free ice cream downtown for couples, do you want to grab some?”

“is there? yeah, i’m down. do you want to take the metro?” 

“that’s perfect, there’s probably so much traffic.”

“alright, i can scoop you and take us to the station in fifteen minutes, okay?”

“perfect.” she closes the conversation, and the call ends.

you flop down on the bed again, just for a moment. your eyes are fixated on the ceiling above as you breathe in, thinking about everything. 

you and danielle aren’t dating, not for real. it’s just a show, a sham. she simply wants to hang out for free ice cream, nothing more. you know this. you set yourself up for this whole fake dating thing—well, kind of, considering hanni was the culprit behind this whole arrangement.

it’s already been over a month, and danielle doesn’t seem fazed in the slightest, treating the whole thing as no big deal. you must be insane; you can’t keep doing this knowing your feelings are growing and she most definitely doesn’t feel anything real. it’s just to benefit you, and she’s a great friend who’s willing to help you out. yet, each time you pretend, it gets harder to separate your act from reality.

despite the turmoil, you’re up and finding a change of clothes in order to make danielle happy. because even if she’s not your girlfriend, she’s your friend and you love her regardless.

(sometimes the love you have claws you from the inside.)

–

danielle clings to your arm the whole way down to the city. sometimes she clings a little tighter than usual, then goes silent, and it makes you breathe deeply.

it takes a few wrong turns and teasing to get to the icecream place, there’s already a long line with actual couples. you feel out of place in a way; there’s partners holding the other by the waist from behind, setting their heads on top of the others. a few are just holding hands or lingering close and you can just sense all the love and adoration in the air. 

you swallow shallowly, tensing your jaw because danielle is close to you, but not because you two are something more than friends.

“wow, so many lovebirds.” she says in awe, gazing around.

“uh huh.” you feel her hand slide down your forearm, then her fingers intertwine with yours as she looks up at you. “hm?”

“to seal the deal.” she shrugs, smiling. “plus, your hands are big… and warm.”

“you have small hands.”

“perfect fit for yours.” she giggles playfully, making you do the same. “what flavors did you want? it’s two scoops for free.”

“you can pick both, i don’t mind.”

“what? c’mon, you should pick one.”

“no, you wanted ice cream. i’m just here to make you happy.” you admit, tightening your grip on her hand. 

she starts to respond, but stops for a few seconds. you watch her look away bashfully, staring at the ground and grinning to herself. she shakes her head, then says, “you’re so lovely…”

“pfttt, i just want you to be happy, seriously.”

“you know,” she begins, looking at you again. “whoever manages to become your girlfriend would be real lucky.”

“oh.” your lips twitch into less of a smile and you pause for a moment. “maybe.”

“this fake dating thing is making me realize that you’re such girlfriend material.”

a small laugh stifles the tension and awkwardness in you, “thanks? you are too.”

“am i?”

“yeah.” you stare into her eyes, shes everything you could wish for in a person. “very.”

before danielle can respond, the line moves, and it’s time for the two of you to decide on two flavors. it takes a while to do so, with you declining the offer to chime in and pick a flavor you want, danielle was the one to invite you out anyway. but she looks at you with puppy eyes, pouts, then puts a hand on the side of your bicep and it makes you cave in.

the final choices are salted caramel and coffee.

danielle holds the cup in one hand, drags you away from the area littered with lovey dovey couples – some being too lovey, considering they can’t seem to get away from each other – and leads you blindly towards a small alley in a neighborhood until a bench comes into view. she pulls you towards it eagerly, making you laugh until you’re both sitting next to each other.

you frown a little as you look at the ice cream in the cup. “some of it is melted.”

“not all of it!” danielle beams, then scroops a spoonful of the coffee side – the flavor you ended up choosing. “you have the first taste.” she says, bringing it closer to your mouth.

“wait, you should have it.”

“too late,” she starts to move it in a circular motion, saying, “ahhh~” as she does so.

you scoff, then lean forward and all of it is in your mouth in one bite. danielle watches your eyes light up.

“it’s good.” you mutter, then grab the other spoon to scoop the other flavor. you mirror what danielle did before, making her laugh just as much. “open wiiiiide~”

“ahhh~”

you snicker before moving the spoon into her mouth, she closes it and smiles immediately, melting in place despite the ice cream being pretty cold. 

the street lights make her look precious, highlighting the satisfaction on her face because of some simple ice cream she’d gotten for free. you want to see her this happy everyday and as much as you can. 

a small hint of ice cream is on the corner of her lips, it urges you to bring your hand over and wipe it off with your thumb. danielle stops savoring the dessert, instead, focusing on you. 

“sorry, there was… yeah.”

“mhm.” danielle says, staring at your lips. “it’s really good.”

“i can tell.” you turn away, feeling flustered when she looks at you like that. “let me try your flavor.”

the two of you continue to eat ice cream together, subconsciously scooting closer and closer as you share it. danielle’s head ends up on your shoulder when the cup is empty in your hand, silent in her place.

you don’t budge, mainly because she seems comfortable and you don’t mind ruining your posture a bit if it’s for her. she sighs contentedly, moving her hand over to hold yours in the midst of the moment, slotting together effortlessly. she doesn’t say anything, but you feel her lean into you a little more.

“you okay?”

“just happy.”

“ah,” you rub your thumb against her skin. “that’s good.”

“being with you makes me really happy.”

“being with you makes me happier.” you say softly, staring at your hands aligned seamlessly. “do you want to stay here for a bit longer?”

“please.”

“it’s getting late.”

“i know, just a bit longer.” danielle says.

just a bit longer. if only the whole arrangement could last forever, if only you two could be this close and warm for lightyears.

minutes pass, and neither of you move, lost in the comforting silence. the only shift comes when you turn your head to press a gentle kiss into her hair. danielle feels perfectly in place, her heart fluttering at the tender gesture. a soft smile spreads across her face, a silent acknowledgment of the moment's sweetness.

–

the night prior had to be a dream, it was too perfect. it was the realest you’ve felt with danielle, the closest to something romantic. it was even enough to consider that she felt the same, and you’d love to revel in that possibility, but you have to restock the beans and cups quickly before tending to the drinks.

there’s only thirty more minutes until your shift ends, it feels like eternity.

sarah catches you smiling to yourself throughout the shift, biting the inside of her lip. she’s filled with all too much: anger, jealously, dissapointment, and really just everything that makes her uneasy. 

she still can’t believe it, you had gone on a whole tangent telling her you couldn’t be in a relationship and now you’re being a complete loser in front of her. she hates it, she wants it to be her that makes you smile randomly throughout the day.

what pisses her off more, and truly makes her lose all hope, is when you go from looking tired and drained to bubbly and smiley as soon as a familiar figure starts walking toward the counter. 

she watches you check the time on the register, your smile widening because you can clock out and be with danielle, who’s waiting just across the counter. the change in your demeanor is undeniable, and it stings sarah to see the joy that danielle effortlessly brings out in you.

you walk over to danielle, reaching for her hand. “hey.”

“hi.” the way danielle says it makes your chest warm and sarah nearly gags in return.

what makes sarah's shoulders sink, her heart drop, and her frown deepen is when danielle suddenly kisses your cheek. 

the shock is evident on your face as you stand frozen, your hand instinctively moving to hover over the spot where danielle's lips had just been. the tenderness of the moment is overwhelming, and sarah can't help but feel a profound sense of loss. the realization that your heart belongs entirely to danielle crushes any lingering hopes she had, leaving her to face the painful truth.

“w-what was that for?” you look over and make eye contact with sarah, who’s grimacing. “there’s um, you know… bystanders.”

“i missed you, so much. i couldn’t stop thinking about you.” danielle says simply, not bothering that sarah is the only one who’s witnessing this, and from a few feet away too. “do you want to get dinner?”

“it’s three in the afternoon silly.”

“well, anything is fine. we should study before we eat! i heard the module mr. lee assigned us was really helpful for…” 

the rest of what danielle says doesn’t register in your coworker’s mind. she studies you closely, her frown deepening with each passing second. it’s painfully clear to her now—you’re genuinely in love with danielle, and there's nothing she can do to change that. the way you look at danielle, like a child seeing a rainbow for the first time, leaves no room for doubt. 

it dawns on her that giving up is the only option, and she feels a pang of resignation settling in her chest.

–

nearly three months have passed and both of you have still been ‘pretending.’

neither of you acknowledge that it’s fake, not during the weekly dates, study sessions, and late night walks or movie nights that end up in the two of you falling asleep together. danielle doesn’t think twice when kissing your cheek here and there, even your knuckles when she thinks you’re asleep. 

you figure that maybe it’s okay to kiss her cheek too sometimes because she’s her lips turn each time. and when you pick her up for weekly dates, she happily jumps into the passengers seat of your car as if it weren’t just a mutual agreement. sarah has already given up, considering she seems defeated, and you wonder if you should too. 

you can’t tell if it’s just how danielle is, which eats you inside. everything feels all too real, and your feelings only grow more unbearable.

–

you shouldn’t have let jimin drag you out to minjeong’s party. she’s already left the moment you stepped into the house, she’s probably gotten a hold of a drink already.

jimin had noticed how deeply stressed you've been lately. your responses were slower, your shoulders seemed permanently slumped, and the stress was practically etched into your face. being one of your closest friends, jimin decided that it was time for a change. she was determined to get you out and help you relax, knowing how crucial it was for your well-being (and social life, to be completely real).

walking around, you scan the crowd for a familiar face. unfortunately, the only people you recognize are sunghoon and jake, who have a history of hitting on you despite your clear disinterest. they still haven't grasped that you're a lesbian. you quickly decide to steer clear of them.

the only reason you’re here is because you’ve been throwing yourself into your studies, staying late at the gym, and doing too much to avoid danielle – or even the thought of her.

(which is unfortunately impossible since every little thing reminds you of her.

the flowers on the counter at your work remind you of her smile, the couch in your apartment is where you two have spent hours together, and really, you’re hopeless.)

you find jimin outside on the porch with her other friends that you’ve only talked to once or twice. they’re all talking about something, clearly tipsy, and you’re walking over to linger near your friend.

“y/n! oh my gosh girl, where have you been? come here, have a drink!” jimin grabs your arm, pulling you in and hugging you like she hasn’t seen you in forever. “here, take a shot.”

she hands you a shot of what you assume is some cheap vodka, you didn’t even have time to pregame for this. you’re not against drinking, not at all, if anything you’re all for it. there’s videos of you in groupchats shotgunning beer and finishing with barely any reaction – but tonight, you don’t know if you’re in the mood for it.

one won’t hurt, maybe it’ll erase danielle from your mind for a moment.

“fine.” you grab the small glass, then bring it to your lips and cock your head back, eyes pinching for a brief moment as you swallow. “shit,” you mumble, “give me another.”

you don’t know what has taken over, because you’re downing two more without hesitation. jimin laughs and smiles proudly at you.

for a brief moment, everything feels fine. the music blasting from inside the house, a mix of charli xcx and the chatter of your friends mocking one of your professors and jake, makes you laugh out loud. amidst the chaos, you find a beer in your hand, and somehow, you manage to tolerate the taste. wonyoung appears too, and hands you another after you quickly finish the first. you accept it, even though you're already starting to feel a bit fuzzy.

jimin looks at minjeong with a sparkle in her eyes, and you subtly push her a little closer until their shoulders touch. they exchange smiles, and you watch, feeling proud of your matchmaking. 

your heart sinks as it suddenly reminds you all too much of danielle. the fondness and spark between jimin and minjeong make you frown, your grip on the beer tightening as the bittersweet memories flood back.

“fuck,” you practically whisper. “i need to, i’m going to get more um, drinks.” 

“hm? okay.” jimin says quickly, then turns back to the girl she’s linking arms with.

your head pounds, so you gulp down the can of beer in your hand, then crumple it and toss it toward a trash bin in your line of sight. 

as you make your way to the kitchen, you spot a bottle of vodka and pour yourself a shot into a plastic cup you found. the liquid burns your throat, intensifying the ache in your head. despite this, you pour another shot, perhaps a bit too generously, hoping to numb the growing pain and the emotions clawing at your heart.

the room feels like it’s spinning, you’re walking down some hall and blinking and blinking until you reach a bathroom. thankfully, no one is making out in it, but you check the shower for safety measures. 

you’re finally alone, groaning as you fall against the wall of the bathroom and slide down until you’re sitting on the bathroom floor.

clumsily, you grab your phone from your back pocket. the screen lights up to a picture of you and danielle, cheeks squished together and smiling. 

you stare at it for too long, your breath hitching and your vision blurring as the ache in your head intensifies. the happy memory contrasts sharply with the heaviness you feel now, making it all the more difficult to look away. she just looks so cute in it.

you tap your screen again, and another picture of her appears. it’s a picture of her asleep in the passengers seat, head tilted uncomfortably and lips parted slightly. you had set up your lock screen to cycle through images of danielle, initially to fool sarah, but also because seeing danielle’s face as soon as you pick up your phone makes you feel at ease. each photo captures her different expressions—laughing, pouting, lost in thought—and they all make you grin. 

the happiness you feel is bittersweet, knowing it’s all part of an arrangement that feels increasingly real to you.

your vision is a little unclear, but somehow it sharpens just so you can see her perfectly.

“fuck,” you gasp out, unlocking your phone and trying to navigate to your recent calls. you had called hanni earlier and she had just been lounging at her place. you figure that she’d be able to take you away from here.

you squint, pressing on the contact that has a and n, assuming it’s hanni, then wait as the phone rings.

“hello?”

“hanni, i’m… can you pick me up?”

“y/n?” her voice is muffled when it reaches your ears, “are you okay? what happened, where are you?”

“jimin… dragged me out. i drank… soooo much.”

“y/n, oh my gosh.”

“hanni, stay on the line, please.”

“i’m not–” the voice cuts off, you drop your phone on the carpet. “hello?”

“you have my location… right.” you slur, head leaning against the wall even more. “hanni i can’t do it anymore.”

“y/n, i’m on my way. are you alright?”

“hanni, i can’t.” you groan, staring up into space. “i don’t want to fake date danielle anymore. it feels too real, i hate it.”

silence follows before you hear the voice on the other end of the phone.

“you can’t? why, why didn’t you tell her?”

“she seems happy, and… we just, don’t acknowledge that it’s not real.”

“y/n…” 

danielle sits in her car, heart sinking. 

you dialed her on accident, and it doesn't seem like you know it’s her. 

“please come. please.”

danielle gulps, feeling tears forming in her eyes. 

–

danielle scavenges through the house your location on her phone has brought you to, looking around for you helplessly. 

she makes her way to the porch and spots jimin, who’s hands are on minjeongs neck as she holds her in place. danielle walks over, not wanting to disturb the intimacy, but you’re her biggest priority, so she’s willing to do so.

“jimin,”

she turns around, looking at danielle confusingly. “oh, when did you get here?”

“where’s y/n?”

“hmmm… she went to get drinks a while ago, she hasn’t come back yet. try the kitchen?”

“okay, thank you.” danielle says hurriedly, then rushes back inside.

she checks the kitchen, only to see jake and sunghoon with beers in their hands as they cackle loudly. you’re nowhere in sight, making her bite her lip in frustration.

danielle goes through every room on the first floor until she reaches a bathroom. she pushes the door open, and it suddenly stops, hitting someone. a groan escapes from behind the door.

"i'm so sorry!" danielle rushes out, peeking around the door to see who she’s just collided with. "y/n?" she gasps, eyes widening in recognition and concern.

you’re sitting against the wall, hair tousled and cheeks red. there’s a white tank top hugging you, the thin straps of it loose against your skin from your posture. 

“hanni?” you look up, squinting. “i wanna go home.” 

you see the figure move closer to you and close the door, then she squats down and you realize it’s not hanni. danielle comes into view, her eyebrows creased with concern. your cheeks flush even harder, and your lips part.

she puts a hand on your forehead, then cups her cheeks with both. “are you okay?”

“you’re not… hanni.”

danielle’s shoulders fall down a bit. “hanni um,” danielle hates lying, but she’s doing it now to save you from spiraling. “she sent me over.”

“oh.” the response from you cracks her heart slightly. “okay.”

"let's go," she says firmly, helping you up. despite being taller and more muscular than her, you lean on her for support. danielle manages to steady you with surprising ease, guiding you out of the bathroom and through the house, her grip strong and unwavering.

–

you collapse onto danielle’s couch and groan, your body is limp against the cushions.

a few moments later, she comes back with a cup of water, placing it on the coffee table before she sits you up. she tilts your chin up and you look at her with wonder as she grabs the cup and holds it to your lips, “drink.”

“mhm.” you mumble, sipping slowly and swallowing. 

your vision clears slightly, though it might just be danielle who’s grounding you. her concerned eyes meet yours, and while guilt tugs at you, you're also captivated by her beauty in this moment. you're drunk and out of your mind, thoughts muddled and unfocused.

“pretty.” you sigh dreamily. 

“y/n,” her voice is laced with uneasiness. “drink more water.”

“okay.”

“and stay the night, okay? you um, left…” she swallows hard, fighting back a frown. “you left your clothes here, i’ll go grab them.”

“can you stay with me though? will you? i really… just… i want you here.” 

danielle bites the inside of her lip, her eyes wide with confusion. just moments ago, you had admitted that you wanted to stop the whole ‘relationship’—that it had become too intense, too overwhelming. and now, you’re asking her to stay? her mind spins with the jarring shift in emotions.

you lean in, clinging onto her. danielle feels the warmth of your breath and the softness of your nose brushing against her neck. the touch sends a shiver through her, and she swallows hard, struggling to steady her breathing. as you pull back, your faces are mere inches apart. you lock eyes with her, your gaze heavy with so much. 

there’s a lump in her throat. “okay.”

–

danielle wakes up with you on top of her and your head in the crook of her neck. she hears you breathing softly and subconsciously, her hand slides into your hair.

why are you so confusing? danielle wonders, twirling your hair with her pointer finger. is this what you really want?

you’re incredibly considerate, a trait that’s always shone brightly. the way you go out of your way for her—planning dates, cherishing every moment together, simply because it makes her happy—fills her with a bittersweet feeling. she adores these shared moments, savoring the illusion of authenticity. but now that it’s clear that all of it strains you, it weighs heavily on her heart.

you stir awake, your breath warm and rhythmic against danielle's skin. as you hum softly, her cheeks flush a delicate pink. she feels the gentle pressure of your arms tightening around her, pulling her closer. you shift, nestling deeper into her, finding a more comfortable position. each movement sends a shiver through danielle, leaving her heart fluttering like crazy at eight in the morning.

she doesn’t know what to do.

–

danielle doesn’t ask you out or come over the whole week, excusing herself by saying she’s busy or caught up with things. of course, you don’t comment on it – she’s not really your girlfriend, you shouldn’t expect her time and affection. 

but then another week passes by and you don’t get any texts back, sometimes she even leaves you on delivered for hours. that’s not like her at all. 

you catch her in class and she’s still the same danielle you know – bubbly, pretty, and sweet – but that’s really the only time you see her these days. 

it’s confusing, all too confusing, so you barge into hanni’s apartment on a thursday evening because she’s the only one you can rant to about this.

“you didn’t even text me–”

“oh my god i think danielle fucking hates me.”

hanni lets you storm in, walking towards her room and flop onto her own bed. you look devasted, especially when you rub your face in your hands and groan loudly.

“okay, first of all: why the hell would she? second of all: yeah, why… why would she…?”

“she’s been avoiding me and i have no fucking clue why.”

“dude what.” 

you recount the entire story to hanni, animatedly illustrating every detail with exaggerated hand gestures. “so, jimin practically dragged me out to unwind, and i ended up drunk out of my mind!” you say. your hands wave dramatically, punctuating the story as you describe stumbling around, the room spinning, and how the whole ordeal felt like a whirlwind. 

hanni watches, her amusement growing as you explain the night’s events. “jesus.”

“yeah, and then danielle came and picked me up.”

“she did?”

“yeah… you called her over… didn’t you?”

“dude, what are you talking about.”

you pause, looking at her with confusion evident all over your face. then grab your phone, heart feeling strained when you see danielle posing with a stuffed animal that one time – out of many –  you two went to the mall together. you click on the phone app, looking at your recent calls and scrolling down to roughly two weeks ago.

you see hanni’s contact name, and then danielles after.

“hanni, did i… did i call you that night? two weeks ago, the friday night i went out.”

“dude you only called me that morning or something, you left something here.”

“oh my fucking god.” you gasp, putting a hand over your mouth. “oh my god.”

“y/n what.”

“i drunk dialed dani and i thought it was you. she told me you sent her to grab me…”

“what did you say to her?” hanni asks, looking at you with slight worry.

you groan, rubbing your face again. “i… i said i didn’t want to fake date her anymore.”

“oh, well that’s not too bad.”

“no, i remember it somehow. i said i hated it.”

your best friend looks at you, confused again. “you do?”

“yeah, but like, no?” you groan once more and fall onto the bed again. “hanni, i’ve… i’ve liked danielle since first semester.”

“oh.”

“yeah, oh.”

“you’ve been fake dating and simultaneously in love with her?”

you sigh. “yes.”

“holy shit.”

“yeah. i think she took it the wrong way, maybe she thinks i hate her?”

“you need to talk to her.”

“she doesn’t want to see me.”

“no, she’s so fond of you. i honestly think she likes you back.”

“okay it’s not the time for that–”

“shut the hell up bro.” hanni pinches your cheek and you slap her hand away. she begins again, “dude, she rambles about you and shit. there were times i actually thought you guys were really dating.”

“i wish.”

“then make it come true!” hanni groans. she pulls you up, then puts both hands on your shoulder. “you need to go talk to her, stop being a pussy.” 

“it’s not that–” 

your phone vibrates in your hand, snapping you out of your animated retelling. instinctively, you glance down and see a notification from danielle. hanni notices the shift in your expression, quirking an eyebrow as you stare at the screen, looking visibly distressed. she leans closer, peeking at the notification.

as your face unlocks the phone, the text is revealed: "can you come over? we should talk." your mouth drops open slightly in shock, and hanni mirrors your expression. the room suddenly feels heavy.

“dude.” hanni points at the screen – the obvious. “she–”

“fuck me.” you mutter, “fuck me.”

“dumbass,” hanni says, pushing you off her bed. you curse and look at her with “what the fuck?” written all over your face. hanni stands up and continues to push you out her room, saying, “go see your ‘girlfriend,’ even if it’s not real you better go talk to mo dani.”

you sigh, pushing her off you and grabbing your things before you walk towards hanni’s apartment door. you stare at the handle, then the text, and linger for a moment. hanni puts a hand on your shoulder and you look at her.

“i’m fucking terrified.”

“well you’ll feel even worse if you don’t go, so go.” hanni urges, opening the door and nudging you out.

–

the air is cold, it’s really just cold outside and it makes you shiver more than you already are just from the thought of the interaction.

you’re outside danielle’s work, sitting on the steps because you can’t bring yourself to go in and approach her directly. maybe it makes you a coward, but you’ve always been nervous about seeing her willingly and making the first move. the minutes stretch on, each one making you more anxious, but you can't help it. the thought of facing her, of initiating that crucial conversation, ties your stomach in knots. she called you out here anyway.

wind hits your cheeks and you bite your lip, walking around in your place in an attempt to warm up. then, you catch someone in the corner of your eye, so you turn around and meet danielle.

a loose sweater drapes over her frame, and wide-fit linen pants hide the shape of her legs. the wind tousles her hair just as it does yours, but she looks effortlessly angelic, stopping your heart for a moment. her hair, caught in the breeze, frames her face in a way that makes her seem almost ethereal, temporarily making you forget your worries.

then she’s walking toward you, and you remember why you’re here.

you swallow hard, body tensing. 

“thank’s for coming, i’m sorry i haven’t been.. um, able to spend time with you.” she looks nervous, her eyes avoiding yours and hands fiddling with each other. she stares at your necklace instead as she continues, “i’ve just… i wanted to talk to you about what we have.”

“right, i wanted to talk to you about it too.”

“oh,” danielle says quietly. “i’m sorry, i didn’t want to be a burden. you called me instead of hanni the night you got drunk and i know how you feel about fake dating. i’m sorry that you had to do it with me and it caused you so much stress i just–”

your heart aches as you listen to her ramble, guilt evident in her voice for something that’s not her fault. you can't bear to hear her blame herself. your brows furrow with pity as you gently cut her off, “danielle, no, let me–”

“stop, i want to make myself clear. i want to explain a lot of things to you, you’re so lovely and sweet and you don’t deserve to be so stressed. it’s just, okay, wait.”

she pauses, breathing in, and looking at you with tears lining her eyes. your breath shakes looking at her like that, you can’t breathe or speak in the moment.

danielle purses her lips before continuing, “okay, when hanni first said you wanted to date me, i got so excited because well, i always thought you were cute.” she turns her head to the side and bites her lip before looking back at you. “and then you said it wasn’t an actual date, you wanted it to be fake. i don’t know i just, i felt really sad when it happened but at the same time the thought of fake dating you didn’t seem too bad because i’m selfish and i mean, i liked you a little and i thought i could just fake it and revel in the artificial aspect until i got over it but i ended up falling for you so much and i’m sorry. i don’t want you to think im anything like sarah–”

“danielle, stop.”

“no, y/n i just want to explain myself–”

“danielle, shut up, oh my god.” you gasp, looking at her in disbelief. “you, are you fucking with me?”

she looks at you, still feeling guilty. when she blinks, two tears fall down her cheeks and she inhales sharply as she conceals a sob. she turns away, then murmurs, “no, i’m so sorry.”

“n-no, no. dani, danielle.” you almost breathe it out, then bring both hands to hold her face. your hands cup her cheeks making her face you. “please stop crying, i’m sorry, baby, i’m sorry.”

“b-baby?” she says, confusing taking over her features. you had gotten so used to calling her endearing pet names that it slipped out so suddenly in the heat of the moment.

the lights outside shine just enough for you to see her clearly. her eyes are watery, tears staining her cheeks, and you use your thumb to gently wipe them away. her nose is a little pink, and so are her cheeks. of course, she’s a pretty crier too, but you look at her with guilt, shaking your head as you continue to stroke her cheeks with your thumb. the sight of her like this breaks your heart even more.

“i only said i hated it because it was all too real, but not in a bad way. not at all.” 

“really?” she says between sniffles. “w-what do you mean?”

“i’m saying that,” you use your thumb to rub a tear threatening to fall from the corner of her eye. “i hated it because i couldn’t take the fact that it wasn’t real. i wanted it to be real. danielle, i’ve wanted to be yours since you first gave me the notes from the first lecture we had together.”

“what?”

“danielle,” you almost whisper, then kiss her forehead. “i like you so much. i don’t hate you, or this – i hate that it’s not real.”

her mouth opens in shock as she looks at you, sniffling. you anxiously wait for a response, hoping she'll say something, but she doesn’t. instead, she hugs you, wrapping her arms around you tightly. you return the embrace, holding her just as tight. the world around you fades away, leaving only the two of you in the nerveracking moment.

“i like you too – a lot. i was so scared when you said you hated it, i thought i was making you uncomfortable and gosh i just felt so bad and–”

you rub her back with your hand and cut her off, “i was anything but uncomfortable, i felt like i was living in a fantasy.”

“thank god.” danielle sighs in relief. 

you pull away, looking at her again and wiping remnants of tears with your thumb again. “i’m sorry for making you cry.”

if you could go back and punch yourself for being stupid — you’d do it in a heartbeat. a dumb slip up and miscommunication from your lips is the reason danielle’s nose is still tinted pink from crying, you feel guilty as ever.

in your hands, it feels like you hold the world. she shakes her head in your hold, then smiles from relief.

“it’s okay.”

“are you busy after this?”

danielle giggles, shaking her head again. “if you’re asking me out on a date – a real one – then absolutely not.”

“dinner? it’s on me for being stupid that night, and this whole time.”

“perfect.”

you smile sweetly at her, your gaze lingering on her lips. before you know it, you lean in and boldly peck her right then and there. she gasps when you pull away, looking at you with widened eyes as you back off. but then, she reels you in again, leaning closer and kissing you once more. the kiss is soft and warm, filled with all the unspoken words and emotions that have built up between you. you feel her smile against your lips, and everything else fades away.

when you part again, you look at her fondly and ask, “wait, this is real, right? like, we’re…”

danielle laughs, hastily pecking you once more and lingering close.

“i don’t think it’s the alcohol that made you so dense and stupid.”

[jenctrl]

sunflower danielle marsh

synopsis; the hero's spidey-senses have been tingling all over her body whenever the sunflower girl walks into the room, however, the problem is that she's a sunflower while Y/n feels like a sun that comes and goes /content; spiderwoman!reader, spider verse au, fluff, teenie tiny bit of angst at one point, mentions; violence, firearms and death but all in a light manner /wc; 8.9k

songs; sunflower - post malone, love 119 - riize, out of me head - steve lacy

a/n; my spiderman obsession has been hitting a bit harder lately so...also im thinking miles morales suit for this one

“There’s a fight happening at the park.”

“I am at the park?”

“Aren’t your spidey senses tingling?”

“Shut up–oh…I might have been preoccupied with the—”

“With the tingles Dani causes, yeah, yeah, it’s by the fountain.”

“Oh my god, look it’s a squirrel!” The girl squealed, shaking the latter beside her who pried away the hands that gripped onto her arm with a deep sigh. 

“Yeah, I can see,” Haerin grumbled while fixing her shirt.

“Y/n look–” Her joyous voice came to a halt as she turned around and the said girl was no longer there where she had been. “Where’s Y/n?” This made Haerin turn away from the tree they had stopped by and her eyes scanned the park.

The sun was shining brightly with nothing but a gentle breeze to cool everyone off together with the shadows. 

Danielle walked past Haerin with a frown, thinking she had lost her other friend among the people walking in the park. “It’s not the first time she just disappears.” The latter mumbled and followed after the girl who hummed and took out her phone. 

“I will call her–Wait here just in case.” She looked back and received a simple nod from Haerin who stopped under the shadow of a tree. Her eyes scanned the area before watching the other girl who walked completely engrossed in her phone.

Danielle squinted her eyes, trying to fix her brightness and cover her phone to see anything all while trying to head for the nearest shadow to make life easier for herself.

The second she got it right she looked for the girl’s number which wasn’t hard to find; all while she wondered how Y/n always managed to disappear or get lost so easily.

She was confused, to say the least, seeing how the girl would avoid her at times or trail behind them. Quite often Danielle made sure all of her friends felt included, but as she did so she rarely succeeded in including herself as the centre of Y/n’s attention. However, the few times that she was–

“Watch out!” She looked up from her phone with wide eyes just as she had managed to press call. The sound of the fountain she was near was just a mere background noise that was drowned out when she finally paid attention to her surroundings; realising that a lot more than the chirping of birds and water was sounding around her. 

Danielle yelped at the body that collided with her, shutting her eyes, the phone that was in her hand no longer there. There was a brief swoosh of air, her feet no longer on the ground, but she could feel herself falling until she collided with the same body that grunted right under her. The impact of her fall was muffled only making her breath hitch.

She raised her head from the body whose heart was about to thump right out of its ribcage—still feeling it thrash under her palms, something was buzzing too—Danielle went mute at the person right under her. It was none other than the local hero. 

“Here’s your phone; are you alright?” She took her phone–the call went to voicemail and that faint buzzing stopped–trying to find words but it was close to impossible as her own heart was pounding from the adrenaline the action had caused her. 

“Yeah, I’m alright.” She managed to get out, wanting to find the next words to thank her hero correctly, but she yelped once again. “Not the head–” Her body was flipped over, shutting her eyes tightly at the slight impact of her back against hitting the grass, however, her head was well protected by a hand. 

This time she opened her eyes and flinched. “Oh come on!” The hero exclaimed at the object that had been thrown their way, hitting the Spidey’s back.

“Five, six–” Danielle’s mouth was left agape at the hero who did a front handspring over her, “pick up sticks,” and then swung–with web–what was a thick branch, “seven, eight, lay them straight,” before launching it at the group of guys who got hit like bowling pins, some trying to scramble away.

“Why are you always daydreaming!?” Haerin was the one pulling the girl up from the grass and away from the fight scene.

“I’m saved as Y/n/n with a red heart in Dani’s contacts.”

“Great Y/n, but you’re literally in the middle of a fight.”

“She’s so pretty!”

“You’re hopeless.”

“I will be anything for her!”

“It all happened so quickly too!” Danielle exclaimed as they walked through the hallways of the college. The girl was so engulfed in the story she told that nothing else would reach her ears.

“I didn’t even notice the fight and suddenly there’s a commotion happening and one of them was about to crash right into me–one second I’m on the ground, the next I’m lifted from it–Spidey swoops in and saves me!”

“We believe you.” Hanni groaned as the girl wouldn’t stop talking about it.

“That’s not the point,” Danielle whined as she looked over her friends, her eyes momentarily landed on the girl who was trailing after them in the back, Y/n. She sighed and shook her head, looking back at Minji and Hanni who were closest to her.

“The point is that I didn’t even get to thank her.” She reasoned, feeling grateful, but somewhat bummed out that she couldn’t even thank the hero who saved her a few days ago.

“Plus Haerin and Y/n were there at the park with me so I have my proof–” She turned around and stretched out her arms to point at Haerin and Y/n, but ultimately stopped which made the whole group stop. “Where’s Y/n?” Her eyes left the spot where Y/n would be and they moved to Haerin who was about to open her mouth but was cut off by Minji.

“She always disappears into thin air.”

“The same thing happened yesterday when that fight happened,” Danielle mumbled and turned on her heels as they continued to walk through the hallway.

“The cat wouldn’t stop clawing at my arm.” 

Sakura threw a glance at the girl, tilting her head to try and have her at the correct angle as the Y/n hung upside down from the ceiling of their dorm. The curtains were down, the room was dim, lit up by Sakura’s setup who was busy fixing up the small tears in the spider suit. 

“Also!” She clicked her tongue at how loud Y/n got all of a sudden. The older girl hummed and flinched again at the loud clatter, looking over to her side to see the girl standing up from the floor and fixing the bin that got tipped over after the fall. “I’m quite sure Haerin knows…” Y/n finished and chewed on her nails as she walked to Sakura and looked over her shoulder. 

“Knows what?”

“My secret.” Y/n whispered right into her friend's ear which made Sakura press it against her shoulder at how it tickled. 

“She doesn’t.” 

The younger girl stood up straight and stretched her back, “I’m telling you, she knows more than she lets on.” She sighed at the feeling and looked back down at her roommate who turned in the swivel chair. The black with red details suit back to its normal self in her hands.

“You should get some rest,” Sakura suggested, dismissing Y/n’s suspicions while handing the suit over to her. 

The girl hummed. “I asked Yunjin to grab me a coffee on her way back, I’m heading to the public library to print some stickers. I made new designs.” Y/n explained as she moved behind the divider to slip the suit on and have it under her clothes.

“Why not the school’s library?” Sakura questioned as she turned back to her computer. 

“Believe it or not; the librarian has given me a ban.” 

“I believe it whole-heartedly.” She rolled her eyes as Y/n blew a raspberry and grabbed her backpack just as there was a knock on the door.

The girl paid no mind to anyone around her as headphones rested atop her ears, printing the stickers she would leave around the city when swinging around.

It was calm and she hadn’t bothered to return to her friends after disappearing to help out someone’s cat. It wasn’t like she didn’t want to hang out with them, the problem was Danielle. 

Well…Maybe Y/n was the problem because she forgot how to act correctly whenever Danielle smiled at her and just did anything around her. She couldn’t help but get lost in her every single time and it was difficult to keep up with anything else going on around her.

It had become a little problem when danger arose and the star of Y/n’s orbit was around. 

The girl quickly turned around, grabbing hold of the hand that was about to touch her shoulder and her eyes widened. With Danielle’s wrist still in her hold she pulled down her headphones with her free hand before quickly letting go of the latter’s hand. 

“Sorry!” She exclaimed and cowered after as it made people turn their heads in the silent library.

Y/n quickly reached for her phone to pause the music which was sounding through the headphones and looked at the two girls in front of her; Danielle let out a breathless chuckle.

“I tried to call your name at first.” Y/n pursed her lips, feeling how her face felt a lot hotter, not just her face, but her whole body. Was it the suit underneath? No because it never got hot in it.

The sound of the stickers printing was what truly brought her back and her eyes landed on Haerin who was right behind Danielle.

Their eyes met and Y/n felt a twinge of paranoia; both girls squinted their eyes at each other and Y/n’s gaze got a bit more intense almost challenging before Haerin frowned. 

‘Oh no, does she know?’

“Anyway–” Danielle was the one to break the silence and intense…staredown? She had no clue what it was, but it eased as Y/n’s eyes landed on her, making her smile a little bigger than she usually did. “You disappeared earlier.”

“Uhm, my roommate–I took her notes by accident instead of my own.” Y/n came up with a quick lie, nodding along to her words to make them seem more believable. 

“Oh okay, so we were talking earlier and I thought it would be better to ask in person,” Danielle continued to talk to the girl whose eyes were glimmering. Y/n was like water in the latter’s presence; glimmering anytime the sun appeared and warming right up for the whole day. 

‘You should probably be listening, but her hair then her eyes, there’s just something about her… Wow, Sakura would be disappointed at this behaviour.’

“Uh-huh.” Y/n nodded, trying her best to snap back into listening to the girl in front of her.

“We’re heading out on Saturday to this café and then we thought of heading to the movies–”

This time Y/n snapped out of it at the shift around her that made it tingle at the back of her head, the hairs on her neck standing up. As if on queue her phone started buzzing; Sakura. 

The loud sirens that were approaching made the two girls look behind them and by the time they looked back at Y/n all that was left were a few stickers that were still being printed. 

“There’s a car chase, actually headed right towards the public library where you are.”

“I’m telling you Haerin knows–Holy!”

“They drove into the building.”

“I can tell–the zipper of my hoodie is stuck.”

“Just leave it.”

“Right, good idea!”

The loud sound of glass breaking shook up the whole library, shrieks and panicked cries mixed in with the already loud volume of sirens and sizzling of what was a reeking car motor. Amidst the chaos and people trying to evacuate, the course of the tall bookshelves was yelling timber.

It seemed to not warn the two girls right under them quickly enough though. Danielle barely managed to make a sound from the fear, already grasping onto Haerin to try and get away from the falling shelves. However, their sense of orientation was extremely off in a moment of pure distress.

“Ready, quite not steady, and go!” A squeak and a grunt were all that was heard before the numerous thuds of shelves falling like dominos followed, leaving nothing but clouds of dust in the air.

Danielle shut her eyes tightly–unsure if she was dead or alive–while hugging the firm yet somehow comforting body. The wind gushed against her skin and she felt the pull of gravity before her toes felt the ground and she opened her eyes.

“Everything alright?” 

She swallowed, her knees almost giving up from the intensity of the adrenaline, once again being met by the local superhero. However, her eyes fell on the black zip-up hoodie, it was so oddly familiar, that it caused her deja vu and she wondered if a book had hit her head after all. It felt like she had seen it just a second ago, the black hoodie with a few red stars stitched onto it which was half zipped up. She was too shaken up to put a finger on it though. 

“Yeah?” She said, however, she did sound quite unsure as they stood now on the second level of the library by the fire escape staircase. Her eyes trailed up the slightly taller figure, the local Spidey tilted her head in confusion and leaned her face in slightly closer.

“Did anything hit your head?” “She’s fine, let’s go already!” Haerin impatiently complained as she was far too scared to stay any longer in the library after almost dying and then flying through the air. 

She grabbed hold of Danielle’s arm to pull her away, but the latter stopped. “Wait!” She finally came back to her senses and looked at the person who saved her.

The words were right at the tip of her tongue; wanting nothing more than to utter the words thank you. However, Haerin was too impatient as she kept on trying to drag the girl towards the exit that was being held open.

“It’s literally–” Danielle gasped, widening her eyes at the web that was shot at her friend, quite literally gluing her mouth shut and making her stumble.

“Cats don’t talk. It will dissolve in an hour or so, be safe, cya later, alligator…” The hero dove right back to the first level of the library and Danielle watched with a defeated look on her face. 

‘You’re so lame…Okay, but does she know? Dani is so cute though–’ 

“Not the printer!”

“That was so scary.” Danielle let out a breath, finally being able to breathe properly after forgetting to do it correctly due to the shock. Those near-death situations were taking a toll on her and she had yet to thank the person who had saved her each of those times. 

“Ugh, did any get in my hair?” 

She looked away from the distance of the campus grounds where they were sitting on a bench to reflect on what had happened. Her eyes landed on Haerin who hadn’t been pleased at all despite being saved. 

“But also so cool, she’s kind of cute.” The girl mumbled as she shook her head, forgetting what Haerin had asked.

Danielle’s thoughts were swinging through her head with no direction, she was trying to connect the web, but it was quite literally impossible because she had no clue where to start. Nothing made sense.

“First off, nothing cool or cute with what she did to me and second; why are you so obsessed with her?” Haerin complained and angrily leaned back against the bench while taking out her phone to check if she looked fine.

“It’s like white knight syndrome or whatever it’s called.” The younger girl added and put her phone away before looking at her friend who looked right back at her with a frown.

“It’s not, she saved me, I wanted to say thank you,” Danielle argued as she didn’t want anything else from the local hero. Just a small thank you.

“Yeah, but where’s Y/n?” That seemed to be a very common question. 

She parted her lips and looked at the lock screen of her phone; a message popped up right as she did. “I just got a text from her.” It was such a normal occurrence that she learned not to be as worried whenever the girl disappeared because somehow Y/n always ended up fine when she checked back to Danielle. 

She couldn’t lie and say that she didn’t get a little sombre whenever the girl just disappeared. It always made her wonder if Y/n really had emergencies or was looking for ways to escape her.

Has Danielle done something wrong? She sighed and opened the text, but despite those little worries she still smiled.

Danielle looked down at her phone, she had been preoccupied with her thoughts rather than paying the usual attention she would to her friends.

She was expecting a text from Y/n with another excuse because those weren’t unusual just like her leaving. It was hard to figure out what the problem was when Y/n was more of a mystery than anything most of the time. 

Maybe Danielle was reading too much into it?

The little bell above the door jingled, making the conversation stop for a second and Danielle looked up with hope that was nothing but crushed when it wasn’t Y/n.  

“Sorry!” Y/n exclaimed, running through the busy street with people. 

The girl glanced down at her phone, 20 minutes late, it could be worse. It had been a long and busy night, by the time she arrived at the dorm the sun was coming up and by the time she fell asleep her alarm started going off. Y/n had ignored Sakura’s advice to cancel and stay in to sleep; she couldn’t miss the opportunity to be with Danielle. 

She fixed the backpack that was sliding off her shoulder and took the last turn, finally arriving at the door of the café. Y/n stopped for a second, looking inside to see her group of friends already there.

Her eyes stayed fixated on the girl who was the definition of a sunflower the way she always looked at the bright side of things.

Danielle looked less bright this time though.

The girl pushed the door open and made it inside, clearing her throat and gazing towards the floor at the attention it got her. However, she didn’t miss how Danielle smiled towards her when her head turned.

“Sorry for being late.” She apologised like she usually got to do.

“Don’t worry about it, the movie starts in an hour so you have time.” Hanni was the one to speak and Y/n nodded, removing her backpack before trying as casually as possible to take a seat beside Danielle. It was like she forgot how to control her body around the girl, her whole body tingled as she took her seat and took a deep breath. 

She watched the girl that had been late who was now sitting and drinking a second coffee. Well, Danielle was observant, at least when it came to Y/n, she somehow caught on to the small changes in her. It wasn’t hard for her to tell that the girl who was sitting right beside her–their knees occasionally brushing, making them both freeze up–was exhausted. 

She felt a bit too shy to straight up ask if Y/n was fine, especially in front of the rest. The girl cared, but she was worried that it would be too obvious.

How stupid could she be? Y/n was her friend, she shouldn’t feel nervous about asking simple questions, or be nervous around her at all. It wasn’t how she felt around her other friends.

Yeah, Danielle liked to play coy with herself. 

She listened in on the conversation Y/n was having with the rest all while gathering some courage to pull Y/n into a conversation just with her once they would be done. However, she would second guess herself because the girl beside her who was close to falling asleep would always avoid her or just leave with no word. 

“Is the cake good?” It seemed to bring Danielle out of her thoughts, realising that she was overthinking once again. Y/n beat her to it and maybe the girl didn’t mind her in the end. The second Y/n would talk to Danielle she’d forget her worries and feel the jitters spark her up to talk. 

“Oh, yeah…Do you want some?” She asked as she looked down at the piece of cake that she had forgotten about midway because of how she lost herself. 

Y/n nodded her head, forgetting words as she was already stuttering in her body language unsure of what to do. Was she supposed to reach for the cake?

Her eyes watched Danielle who pushed it closer and Y/n was about to reach her hand for the fork, however, the latter beat her to it. Her eyes wandered, trying to look at Danielle who was looking at her, but she only could hold eye contact for a second and not any longer. 

‘Take a bite and act cool…You’re anything, but cool though.’

Y/n had a feeling she would melt from the heat running up to her ears as she let Danielle feed her. The cake was sweet, but Y/n couldn’t help but think about how much sweeter the girl beside her was as she smiled at her.

“I was worried you wouldn’t show up, you know?” Did that mean that Danielle liked having Y/n around? That she noticed when she wasn’t present? It could be a friendly thing though, right? 

‘You’re so bad at reading words.’

“Sorry, I was up studying and missed my alarm.” Y/n lied, she couldn’t tell the girl the truth. She couldn’t tell her that all those times she left her without a word was because she was more than just Y/n; the girl who rode her skateboard into Danielle on the first day of college. 

It made a shiver run across her body; maybe friends were all they should be. Y/n couldn’t provide Danielle with a sun 24/7 because she would always come and go. The girl beside her deserved a sun and more, all Y/n could give was the dust she left behind her every time she disappeared. 

“It’s fine, I’m happy you showed up in the end–” Danielle frowned when Y/n abruptly stood up from her chair, it caught everyone’s attention at the table. 

“Sorry! I have to take this,” she quickly excused herself, not waiting for another word as she grabbed her stuff and was already out the door. 

Danielle felt herself deflate once more as her head started to grasp at any possible straws as to why Y/n always left her behind. 

“There was a robbery at a corner store, he is heading your way right now.”

“Okay…”

“Are you alright?”

“Dani probably deserves better than me.”

“Why would you say that?”

“She deserves someone who can be there for her all the time, I can’t.”

“Y/n–”

What was peaceful yet somewhat gloomy for Danielle only seemed to turn worse when the door to the quiet café burst open. “Everyone get on the ground!” The sight of a man nothing more than paranoid and with a firearm was enough to cause chaos among the customers who ducked to the floor when the man pointed at them. 

“Oh no!” Hanni cried out as the four girls found themselves on the floor, trying to hide under the table and stay out of sight. 

“Shut up,” Minji warned as they had yet to have the gun pointed their way and seeing how the man was paranoid, anything could go wrong. 

“I just bought these jeans.” The shorter girl complained.

“Spider-woman, she’s here somewhere, I saw her!” The man exclaimed, revealing the cause of his paranoia. “I will hurt someone if she tries anything.”

“Am I the only one who finds it weird that–” Haerin tried to say something, only to have Minji cover her mouth, shushing her the same way she had done with Hanni.

Danielle thought she would grow used to it by now, but it wasn’t pleasant this time either when she was in danger. It seemed to be everywhere she went lately and each time she was more worried about Y/n than herself; what if she ran back inside? The man would fire right away, wouldn’t he?

Her eyes scanned around the place, her phone was still atop the table and she tried as subtly as possible to reach for it. It seemed though that Minji was as paranoid as the man with a gun; it was quite valid, but still.

“Stop it, he’s gonna see you.” 

“I need my phone.”

“What for? We’re all about to die.” Minji argued with the girl, trying to pull her back down and under the table where they hadn’t been spotted yet. 

“Oh my God, I don’t wanna die.” Hanni cried. 

“Look at what you did,” Danielle complained, trying to divert Minji’s attention to Hanni who was about to start crying. “I need it to–”

“What’re you two doing!?” Both girls flinched and tried to retreat right back to cower away from the man. Haerin clicked her tongue at Hanni who was close to climbing onto her to try and hide.

“Nothing good sir!” Minji squeaked out, widening her eyes as he made his way towards them.

“Throw your phones away.” He ordered them, Hanni and Minji were the first ones to slide their phones over to the man's feet. 

“You two, your phones.” Haerin was next when he pointed the firearm her way, but Danielle was stubborn. All she wanted to do was send a text to warn the girl who could show up any second. 

“Give him the damn phone.” They bickered, trying to pry it away from her hold. 

“Noo.” She whined, but it got snatched by none other than the man himself who tossed it to the side. 

“You.” “Me?” Minji pointed at herself when he pointed at her. “Get up.” 

“Well, I think I'd rather sit here and–” “I said get up!” Her arm got grabbed, her other arm slipping out of Hanni’s grasp who was still hiding behind Haerin.

“Okay, but you’re actually hurting my arm.” Minji pointed out, pointing at the hand that was gripping her arm quite tightly. 

“Are you all making fun of me!?” The man snapped and another wave of panicked gasps and cries echoed through the café when the firearm was pointed right at the girl; holding her at gunpoint. 

Danielle tried to look for a rational solution to this. Where were the cops? She looked around while her friends tried to reason with the criminal. Minji looked like she was about to pass out. 

Where was Spider-woman?

For whatever reason, she looked up with a frown and got her answer when she saw the figure through the closed ventilation. She blinked at the gesture of the hero who was signalling. Danielle got it.

“Knock knock.” The man snapped his head up at the ventilation right above him at the voice. 

“Who’s there, I will shoot!” 

“Your friendly neighbourhood spider-woman,” yet again, screams followed as the vent fell out and a gunshot followed, hitting the ceiling. Danielle quickly got up and grabbed hold of Minji’s arm, pulling her away while the hero tackled the man right to the ground.

The four girls watched the hero who saved the day once again swing away and disappear between the buildings. As they fell into chatter about what had happened while the cops handled the rest of the situation, Danielle finally got to open her messages with Y/n. It had been a while since she left.

“Hey–” She didn’t manage to even start the text and looked right back up, seeing the girl running towards them. “What happened?” Hanni was the first one to jump right into explaining what happened as if she hadn’t cried through the whole scene.

“How about we just watch a movie at our dorm?” Minji suggested, offering hers and Hanni’s dorm after what happened. 

“Are you alright?” Y/n walked over to Danielle as they all started heading back to college grounds, knowing very well what had gone down in the café the second she left. She still wanted to make sure that Dani was alright. 

Danielle hummed and gave Y/n a smile. “Yeah,” she chuckled and looked over the girl’s face who still looked just as tired. She smiled a little bigger at the genuine worry Y/n’s face held. “You’re lucky.” She commented.

“I am?” Y/n questioned, getting another hum, watching the way Danielle gave her a nod of affirmation with it. Her breath got caught in her throat when she felt Danielle’s fingers brush against hers. 

‘Hold her hand, just take it into yours like they do in movies…’ 

Y/n glanced down at the girl’s hand–their friends not paying them any mind as they walked in front of them–they were so close and all she wanted to do was hold Dani’s hand. 

“Yeah, it’s like you sense danger, the way you disappear when something bad is about to happen.” Y/n let out a small laugh at the words that reminded her of why she had disappeared and remembered what she had come to realise right before it.

“I think Sakura is the one who can sense it since she called.” 

Danielle twisted her lips, trying to keep up her smile as she glanced down–wanting to hold Y/n’s hand–and Y/n put her hands in the pockets of her jeans. 

“You did miss Spiderwoman though.” She joked, trying to lighten up her heart which seemed to get a little dull. 

“So…Somewhere between lucky and unlucky.” Danielle smiled, shaking her head, Y/n still managed to brighten up everything for her. 

Danielle hadn’t been expecting much to come out of sitting and watching movies in Minji and Hanni’s cramped dorm. It was cosy, to say the least, but she was still too busy thinking about the girl beside her. 

Could she even call them mixed signals? 

Dani felt time stop for a few seconds, her heart stalled as she tensed up. She tried to move as little as possible as she was sitting on the bed with the girl whose head was now on her shoulder. It wasn’t weird, she would lend her shoulder to all her friends, that’s just how she was, but having Y/n’s head drop onto her shoulder felt different and she was aware. 

Painfully aware.

She glanced down at the girl who was asleep, carefully moving her hand over to Y/n’s which was resting beside her leg. Danielle gently ran her fingers over the girl’s arm which was covered by a hoodie.

She smiled when she got to the girl’s hand, tracing her thumb over Y/n’s soft palm before she pulled the sleeve of the hoodie down further and took her hand into her lap; she did get to hold her hand in the end. 

All Danielle needed to do now was just find the opportunity to talk to Y/n.

After a day that had felt dragged out attending classes, Y/n found herself away from campus. The ground under her vibrated as yet another train passed by, sitting right under the subway tracks where the old and quite abandoned skatepark was.

It had been a while since she last had time to enjoy it and mess around on her board, however during one of her classes with Dani the girl had asked her if they could spend time alone.

Of course, Y/n had concluded that a crush was all that Danielle would ever be to her and she would never become more. How could she become more if Y/n couldn’t even start by giving her enough now? 

It didn’t mean that she wouldn’t spend time with her, especially since just the thought of Dani made Y/n smile which was something she always needed in her world.

Who would have thought that being the local superhero could turn so gloomy at times? She loved it, but it took away a lot, especially the people around her and holding a secret this big could almost feel like a heavy burden on her shoulders. 

She glanced at her phone, bobbing her head along to the song that played through the speakers of her headphones. The girl had arrived earlier to skate before Danielle would arrive and the latter should be there soon enough unless she had missed her train. 

However, nothing could go as planned for Y/n when her music was interrupted by a call from Sakura.

“There have been disruptions between the control centre and the incoming subway train after the ropes snapped on the crane causing girders to fall right atop the tracks, Y/n.”

“Is it really that–Wait, is it the train that stops near the campus?”

“Exactly that one and it will fly right off the rails in a few minutes.”

“Dani is on that train.”

Danielle flinched at the sudden and loud thud that made her look up from her phone, eyes widening at the familiar figure that clung onto the side of the train, staring right at her through the window.

She was confused, watching the spider crawl up and disappear and suddenly her heart rate spiked up. 

Of course, Spider-Woman was nothing but good, but if she suddenly appeared, it could only mean that something was wrong. Not only did she appear out of nowhere, but quite literally halfway changed with a hoodie, shorts, and sneakers still on with the suit under the regular clothes. 

How bad was it?

Danielle got her answer the second the train screeched, making her grab hold of the pole she stood beside to not fly right onto the floor at the abrupt stop. It was still rolling, trying to stop, screeching and making people fall into panicked chatter, trying to figure out what was going on.

Something made the air shake from what sounded like an explosion. 

It all turned into those familiar gasps and distressed shouts as everyone was growing scared; Danielle included when the railway vehicle finally came to a stop but with a loud crash and suddenly the wagon was starting to tip over, tilting forward. As far as Dani was concerned the subway didn’t go downhill, especially not at a steep angle like this was starting slowly to become. 

It had stopped, but it was gradually with intervals tilting or more so falling more and more. Danielle quickly moved over to the windows, grabbing hold of another pole to try and get a peek at what was going on. 

“The whole crane exploded and the bridge!”

“Are you handling it? This is probably something more than just an accident.” 

“I’m trying to prevent the operator cab from falling off and dragging the rest of the wagons with it–people need to start evacuating from the back exit.”

Watching the front of the train hang in the air, supported by multiple webs that connected to the other end of the bridge, looked far from right. It wasn’t right as she watched the hero shoot more strings to hold it all up.

She could barely see through the thick black clouds of smoke that were coating the air around it from the fire under it. 

“Everyone, evacuate through the last wagon, firefighters are waiting!” That was all she caught before people started to pile up to get to the back. They were quite literally in the third wagon–the second was out of service, the first one off the rails. 

Danielle got bumped into as she was about to do the same, her frame being pushed the wrong way and the subway train dropped yet again, making her stumble back and onto the hard floor with a yelp. The angle would become steep any second now and she wouldn’t be able to make it out at all.

Oh was she going to die such a pathetic death?

No way, she still had to talk to Y/n, may that thought be what saved her as yet another explosion followed with terrified screams. 

“Give me a break.” She groaned in annoyance and pulled herself up on her feet, watching people running out of the wagon she was in and disappear, heading towards the end of the tail.

Clearly, not everyone could be called a hero after no one had even considered helping her up. Bitterly she was back up on her feet, holding onto whatever she could to make it easier to walk up the acute angle. 

It wasn’t too bad yet, but she felt heat run across her spine because it couldn’t be good for too long. Lately, it has been anything but good, but she tried to look on the bright side, if she got out she would finally be able to talk to Y/n; she has waited a week now to gather the courage.

It wasn’t good, but it could be worse, couldn’t it?

Danielle ran, whatever was happening behind her didn’t sound good at all and it felt like she was running on a treadmill whose incline constantly went up. Exhaustion was starting to take over and her legs burned, praying that she wouldn’t slip because if she went down now, there was no going back. 

Nope! She probably jinxed herself.

Something snapped–the webs–and it was free fall from there, right back to where she came from. She tried to grab onto something, but her feet didn’t slip, however, her hands did as she missed the next pole, only touching it with her fingertips.

A shriek escaped her lips and no thoughts were left in her head, vividly aware of there being no point as nothing mattered anymore if she was falling to her death anyway.

“Incy Wincy Spider climbed up the rails!” Her body was caught and she huffed, tightly wrapping her arms around the shoulders. “Down goes the train!” Only hearing the webs shoot out before they were launched up, a loud crash followed with another explosion after them and she didn’t dare to open her eyes because she couldn’t tell if she was alive or dreaming after feeling a wave of heat hit her too. 

The air around her swooshed, sirens, screams and it was all growing faint as an arm wrapped around her waist. She slowly dared to open her eyes, she was far from the ground and it made her grip tighten. 

Dani however trusted the person who held her, trusting her not to let her fall as she hadn’t let her fall with the train she saw down below; it had fallen off the tracks, going up in flames with everything else. The Spidey who was holding onto her kept humming the nursery rhyme she had tweaked earlier.

She inhaled deeply at the pull of gravity with her eyes closed, she only opened them once she felt the ground under her feet.

“You’re all safe now.” Danielle carefully stepped back, looking around to see that she was at the top of a building. Her eyes fell back on the girl in front of her before she could disappear.

“The door is unlocked and you can just head down.” She looked where the door was and snapped her head back at the footsteps.

There was still something she wanted to do, something she had wanted to do for a while now and she’s simply never had the chance. Spider-woman lived a fast-paced life, but Dani was sure she could make some time for her, at least for a few minutes.

“Wait!” She exclaimed and grabbed onto the girl’s wrist who had turned around to run off. It made Spidey turn back around on her heels with a hum, tilting her head at Danielle. She let go and took a breath before swallowing to make room for the words.

“Thank you.” Danielle finally managed to get out and let out a breathless chuckle at the finger-guns pointed at her as the hero slowly backed up. This was it.

“Of course, I’m your friendly neighbourhood–”

“Thank you for always looking out for me, Y/n.” Dani added and inhaled deeply, balling up her fists before she relaxed, releasing that breath she took. 

“What?”

“I know you’re under the mask, Y/n,” Danielle stated, her tone firm yet she felt it all shaking up inside her. 

The hero let out a little chuckle. “What if I’m not actually under the mask? Won’t it be embarrassing for you if you are wrong?

She let out a breath, a hopeless chuckle and maybe she couldn’t get Y/n to trust her. 

“Y/n, I’ve been sure about it for the past week,” the signs were all there laid out in front of her this whole time, they had been especially clear these past few weeks.

The time in the park when a phone was buzzing and stopped the second Dani’s call to Y/n ended. 

The hoodie in the library, Y/n had the same hoodie on her before disappearing, Danielle had seen the girl wear it on multiple occasions before too. Sakura had helped her patch those stars onto it; Y/n would never shut up about it and Dani loved watching her happily boast about her roommate.

The rhymes, the ‘cya later alligator’ and the lame but somehow endearing and cute actions and words she only knew Y/n for. 

Simply the fact that Y/n always disappeared whenever crime took place. Hell, she had never seen Spider-woman and Y/n in the same room and considering how often she was with Y/n it would have happened by now. 

The Saturday after what happened at the café when they went to watch movies at their friends' dorm. That was the night her suspicions got confirmed when she saw the suit peek out from Y/n’s hoodie, making Danielle cover it for her so no one else would see. 

Everything was in front of her now as the Spider-woman was wearing Y/n’s clothes over the suit. 

Dani watched the way Spider-woman, Y/n, slumped her shoulders and looked down. 

“Dani–” Y/n tried, but was cut off by the latter. 

She was feeling vulnerable, everything she had tried to prevent from happening was happening. Y/n was supposed to leave Danielle behind, but now she knew about her biggest secret. She was letting her into parts of her life she hadn’t let anyone else into except her roommate. 

“I just wish you trusted me the same way I trust you and wouldn’t put a distance between us.” She let out, jutting out her lower lip as she frowned, her deep breaths mixing with the wind that howled in her ears. 

“I don’t put a distance between us, Dani.” Y/n tried to argue, but she knew very well how many miles she had put between them. From the secrets to the lies, all the way to all the things she had done to try and avoid letting Danielle in too close. She couldn’t do it to the girl, she couldn’t let her into a place she would never stay in because Y/n would always come and go.

That was her life as the friendly neighbourhood Spider-woman.

“But you do and I don’t understand why…You won’t even take off your mask!” She raised her voice in desperation as she refused to let Y/n close the door on her.

Dani never cared about Y/n staying, all she cared about was being let inside so Y/n would have someone to come back to once she did. She had come to the realisation–after figuring out the girl’s secret identity–that Y/n would always leave, but she’d also always come back.

If only she had let Danielle know why she always left in the first place then they wouldn’t be in this position.

Y/n huffed and pulled the mask off of her face, using her sleeve to wipe away the tears that had formed from the intensity of the moment as so much had just happened.

All she could do now was make Danielle understand just why she put a distance between them; explain why she distanced herself from most people. How her life was miserable without the people closest to her, but how she still couldn’t be as close as she wanted with them. 

How Dani deserved way better than her.

Y/n bunched up the mask in her fist, she loved it, she loved it all, but she hated so many parts of it. She hated that to save the lives of people, she had to hurt the people she loved the most by disappointing them. 

“You know it's like when my spidey senses are tingling but the difference is that you cause more than a micro shift when you step in a room and it causes my whole body to tingle.” Y/n at last confessed, the words bursting out of her as she threw her arms up. It made her pace back and forth at the frustrations of having so much to give, but not being able to. 

“I feel so hopeless because you’re the sunshine, a sunflower always looking towards the bright and I try to do that but my world isn't as bright.” She continued, refusing to look at Danielle as she stopped and glared down at the roof under her feet.

Y/n’s body deflated like a balloon, feeling all those pent-up emotions of anger disappear and the sadness of the situation wash over her instead.

“It’s full of danger, it’s full of uncertainty about tomorrow, it can turn gloomy on the brightest days, it’s a burden I love and hate carrying. It isn’t something you deserve, something anyone close to me deserves.” Y/n sighed and all she felt like doing was crying as she knew that it was over from here.

“I will never be able to just be there, I will always appear and disappear.”

Danielle would understand the reality of Y/n’s life and leave her behind before Y/n could do it; not like she would be able to do it, but the sunflower would turn away from the sun that never stayed, and find one that would always be there. 

“Dani, you deserve better than me.” Y/n widened her eyes and looked up in panic. “Oh my god do you even like me like that!?” It would be embarrassing if she had just assumed that Danielle wanted to be more than friends. Even if they would only be friends, Y/n still needed her to understand why the distance was needed.  

Danielle chuckled, watching the girl who almost jumped at the sheer panic. She heard every word Y/n told her and instead of them pushing her away, they made her want to step so much closer to her. It made her realise how much Y/n needed someone and she wanted to be that someone simply because it was Y/n. 

“You don’t even realise what you’re saying.” The girl stated as she made it in front of Y/n and grabbed hold of her hands. Dani looked down at the mask clutched in the gloved hand, the mask of far more responsibility than one person could carry alone. 

“What?” Y/n looked at the girl who she viewed as a sunflower, feeling the warmth swallow her ears when Danielle looked up and met her eyes.

Under the sun, her eyes glimmered, with the wind her curls gently moved and with the smile that plastered itself on her lips Y/n’s whole world lit up and it always made everything feel easier. 

“A sunflower?” Danielle questioned with a breathless chuckle, her thumbs caressing Y/n’s hands. 

“Yes…” She mumbled, glancing away as she was worried that Dani would find the comparison stupid. 

“I look towards the bright, I look at you and get warm, feel a smile form, Y/n. Why on earth would I ever not like you back? If I’m a sunflower then you’re the sun I turn towards.”

Yeah, Danielle’s whole body was fuzzy and maybe her fingers would tremble from the nerves if she didn’t hold onto Y/n, but she dwelled on the feeling as she watched Y/n with a fond smile. The girl simply made her feel warm and bright just by being there. 

It made her burdens disappear, she only wanted Y/n to feel the same way. 

“You’re exactly what I deserve and want and you deserve to have someone there for you too. I can’t let you carry it all alone. So what if you leave? So does the sun in the sky.” She glanced towards the said sun with her eyes squinted, tightening her grip on Y/n.

Danielle was ready to risk it all for Y/n because she was all that she wanted. It was scary, she had to admit that it was, Y/n was right, tomorrow was unknown and it was terrifying but she knew what she wanted at the moment and that was where she lived, only worrying about what was now. She could worry about the unknown future when it would come. 

“You deserve someone who will be there when you come back and I want to be that home for you, Y/n.” 

Y/n had no words; she hadn’t been expecting things to turn out this way at all. She had expected Danielle to leave her, to be a sun with nothing to warm up.

Her ears were muffled, her face felt hot, her heart beat up in her ears and she could feel those tingles running all over her body again, feeling the shift in her that the girl in front of her always caused.

Suddenly she felt like the bee that was drawn to the sunflower because the warmth it gathered had been just what Y/n needed without realising. Luckily she had Dani to realise it for her. 

The girl huffed when Y/n crashed into her, hugging her close. Danielle wrapped her arms around Y/n’s waist, resting her cheek against the taller girl’s shoulder.

The loud thumping of Y/n’s heart matched hers and she smiled, closing her eyes as she could remember how it sounded the same that day in the park. They were tangled up together, but tangled together in webs of love with their hearts. 

“Thank you, Dani.” She mumbled. 

The girl was everything that she had imagined and so much more as she turned out to be something that Y/n also needed. Most importantly, Y/n–not spider-woman–but Y/n was someone that was needed beyond her secret identity, someone who Danielle wanted and needed there. 

“I’m always here.” She reassured Y/n as they pulled back, she bit her lower lip at the blush on Y/n’s cheeks who exhaled deeply before looking at her seriously. However, Dani’s silly superhero couldn’t keep her composure as she covered her face with her gloved hands, letting out an almost inaudible squeal.

“It’s official then!” Danielle hummed, tilting her head and Y/n peeked out from between her fingers. 

“You’re my girlfriend.” 

“Oh? Just like that?” She questioned with a laugh at the statement, seeing that she hadn’t been left with another choice as Y/n finally showed her flushed face with that big smile. 

“Yes, it’s not even up for discussion–” Y/n firmly stated as she put the mask back on, stepping back she pointed at Danielle with finger guns once again. “I will go and figure out whatever it was that happened and meet you at the dorms.” 

She giggled, nodding at Y/n words, watching the girl who was turning around, but she stopped just as she was going to run off. 

“Wait, wait, can we just—what if…” Y/n stuttered, turning back around on her heels, she cleared her throat and rubbed at the back of her neck. “We kiss.” She tried to suggest as casually as possible with a shrug, letting her hand fall. 

“If you want to.” 

“Yes, I'd love to.” 

Danielle shook her head as Y/n didn’t move from her spot, so she took it upon herself after seeing the girl glued to her spot. She looked up at Y/n who hadn’t even started to lift the mask.

“You’re such a goof,” Dani stated and reached up, pulling Y/n’s mask up above her nose before cupping her face and leaning in as she stood on her toes, finally feeling Y/n move and hold onto her waist.

‘Oh my, about to faint, Dani is going to kiss you, you’re about to kiss–!!!!!!!!!!!’

[jenscx]

[05] tumblr girls — house of memories

it was cliché; being in love with danielle marsh, the straightest girl on earth. you thought your feelings were hopeless, until you discover her tumblr blog.

danielle’s dakgangjeong was delicious. you don’t regret proposing to her on the spot. if embarrassing yourself meant that you could eat her food on a daily basis, it was well worth it. the mere thought of her food made you salivate. you slap your cheeks lightly, willing yourself to focus on the lesson. the sound emitted from your slap catches the attention of haerin, who stares at you.

her stare reads, ‘i know what you’re thinking about.’ you arch an eyebrow at her. haerin definitely knows about danielle liking you, danielle’s tumblr post mentioned it. you wonder what danielle has said to haerin.

has she talked about your smile? your hair? your looks? or maybe your personality? well, you weren’t sure what danielle could say about that. even basing it off a couple interactions, you probably came off as weird and awkward.

the seeds of doubt seemed to have grown recently. how could danielle like someone like you? maybe she’s crazy. no, you take that back. she’s perfect. almost too perfect. oh, maybe that was what was wrong with her. no one could be that amazing and gorgeous and perfect. only danielle marsh. only mo jihye.

“are you insane?” you hear haerin ask quietly when you slam your head against the desk. a red, quickly forming, mark appears on your forehead, a reminder of the pain. you wince, both at her harsh tone and the lingering seethe.

massaging the sore spot, you turn behind, facing haerin who’s staring at you with a bored expression.

“do you know what flowers danielle likes?”

the header of her blog was a bouquet of tulips, but you could never be too sure. what if she likes dandelions or sunflowers? she was basically the sun reincarnated. to be honest, if she was the sun, you’d understand why sunflowers all face the sun. who wouldn’t want to look at danielle all day?

“gardenias,” she replies, her face morphing into one of curiosity, “why are you asking?”

well, if danielle didn’t mind you telling her best friend…

“i asked her to go visit this dog cafe with me tomorrow,” you explain, “i mean, like, kind of a date, i guess? just thought it would be nice to get some flowers for her.”

haerin lights up, a smirk plastered on her face, “does she know it’s a date?”

“uh, no?” her smile drops immediately.

“what.”

you instantly cower, fearing the intense, narrowing gaze that haerin adorned.

“we’re just hanging out. i didn’t really say that it was a date,” your voice comes out strained and quiet. haerin sighs loudly, her disappointment evident. guilt seeps into your every vein, did danielle tell her it was a date? you didn’t know what to say, only staring back at the orbs of exasperation.

a hand slams onto the whiteboard, a look of anger portraying your teacher’s face. you instantly jolt back to look at the front.

“anything to share with the class?” he prods.

haerin speaks out, noting your frozen state, “no sir.” she sends you a glare.

you deflate in your chair, mind only focusing on the blurry image of brown, wavy curls and a blinding smile.

the day had gone by in a blur. with your constant dozing off, you barely noticed the school bell ringing, signifying the end of the day. minji and hanni stand before your desk, a look of concern evident on their faces.

“is she alive?” minji asks, waving a hand in front of your face. you finally regain some of your senses, swatting her waving hand away. hanni rolls her eyes and shoves your belongings into your bag.

“girl hurry up,” she whines, “i wanna go get ice cream.” you groan, heeding to hanni’s words as you hurry out of the classroom with your friends.

maybe you could worry about your fatigue later, you had two whiny best friends to take care of first.

in the midst of licking your vanilla ice cream, (hanni had called you basic but you think she’s just jealous minji ate some of yours instead of hers), your phone beeps. and it beeps continuously until minji huffs, “turn that thing off.”

you roll your eyes and do as told, turning your phone to silent mode while minji fans herself and dabs away the droplets of sweat falling down her neck.

“do y’all remember when sungchan from the other block punched some jock in the face?” hanni suddenly brings up.

“oh yeah!” minji’s eyes widen, the heat long forgotten as you reminisce about the past years.

“what was it again? that guy was making fun of shotaro or something?” you ask.

hanni nods fervently, “yeah. i think sungchan got away with it too since someone had caught the jock pushing taro around.”

“wonder what it’s like to have someone defend my honour like sungchan did,” minji laughs, her uniform drenched with sweat. you watch hanni’s eyes follow her hands, pulling her damp hair into a makeshift ponytail. scoffing at the girl, you continue eating your ice cream.

maybe it would be nice to have someone defend your honour.

your teeth reach the cone.

“where are you bringing danielle tomorrow?”

“dog cafe,” you answer, “i might tell her soon.”

it’s the underlying fact that danielle has unintentionally exposed herself (or you had snooped around) on her tumblr blog that makes you so at ease. the mere statement that she likes her project partner could only be linked back to you. unless she had another project partner…

“oh serious?” minji asks.

you nod.

“congrats bro!”

it’s a little awkward with the way minji’s patting your back like you’re a kid. hanni just stares incredulously at how she’s treating you. sometimes it feels like they’re your parents, even though they fight and bicker incessantly.

“i can’t believe you managed to hide the fact that you liked her for so long from us though,” hanni sighs, “I literally told you about my crush and you didn’t tell me about yours. i’m feeling a little betrayed.”

while hanni’s moaning about your so called betrayal, you notice how minji stiffens up at the mention of hanni having a crush. her eyes slowly shift to the girl.

“you like someone?”

wow. you didn’t realise how easy it was for them to turn into a bunch of awkward losers.

hanni rolls her eyes.

“shut up, anyway, since when did you even like danielle? i mean, you didn’t even know her korean name.”

“the minor details don’t matter!”

“so when did you start liking her? you never told us,” minji asks curiously.

you remember the first time your eyes landed on the girl. sixteen and naive, dreaming of things that were beyond your control. the kid from the other block, you were called. it was strange, adapting to an environment where everyone else knew each other but you. yet, it was good. you met hanni and minji and eventually bumped into danielle in the hallway. you don’t think she remembers, but you do. the strangest thing was, that the moment you locked your sight onto her, everything else fell into place magically.

your extracurriculars, classes, friend groups, everything suddenly made sense and became easygoing. something about danielle made your life brighter, even though you barely knew the girl. it was like the universe knew that she had arrived. and maybe in another life, if everyone were sunflowers, you’d face danielle instead of the sun.

despite knowing close to nothing about the cheerleader, she made life happier. your day would be made even with a glance from her. you would giggle and smile at the memory even though it may be fleeting. and knowing that she shares the same sentiments? well, it just propelled you out of earth. you felt like you were constantly on cloud nine.

“when i moved over from the other block,” your teeth sank into the cone.

minji guffaws.

“dude! you’ve liked her for so long?”

“i guess so,” you’ve never truly realised how fast time passed. maybe liking danielle was such a constant in your life that you didn’t even notice how slowly you grew up.

frowning at the thought, you sigh, “she’s just really easy to like.”

hanni nods, “i get it.”

she doesn’t notice how swiftly minji turns her head.

“she’s just… perfect.”

there’s no other word to describe danielle marsh. she’s just amazingly perfect. it’s a little unnerving. how could someone be so perfect? it was unreal. you feel like you’ve mentioned this before.

“alright romeo,” hanni giggles, “calm down.”

you stare at her blankly before chuckling at your own feelings.

while minji and hanni finish up their ice cream, you check your phone. instantly, a wave of shock and exhilaration runs through your body. your phone lights up with a series of unread messages from danielle.

danielle [4.29pm]:

hii y/n!!

do u think this looks nice?

[image attached]

was thinking of wearing this tmrw

what do u think? :))

no wonder your phone was ringing just now! you sigh softly at your own stupidity. danielle must have been waiting for your reply. what if she was waiting for a long time? your heart constricts at the thought of danielle pouting, eagerly but patiently waiting. your hands fly to respond.

jeon y/n [5.16pm]:

you look gorgeous

please wear that ㅜㅜ

omg

sorry for replying late…

i was with minji and hanni

maybe she would be able to feel your sincerity through your messages.

danielle [5.17pm]:

hello!!

aw really? :D

thanks y/n!!

ure too sweet <3

that heart again. ugh. you could feel your own heart clenching at her cuteness.

meanwhile, your friends eye you with disgust.

whatever. not like they understand.

your hair sways in the wind, matching the flutters of your heart. in your hair, a crushed bouquet of gardenias rests. the crinkles in the wrapping weren’t your fault! you were just too nervous waiting for danielle. despite your protests, danielle had forced you to not pick her up, and insisted you to just meet her at a nearby cafe instead.

“y/n!”

oh my goodness.

“hi dani,” you greet shyly.

if liking girls, or more specifically danielle, was a sin, you’d gladly go to hell and while there, you would brag about how you’ve captured a glance of heaven.

“for me?”

you were definitely in love. the curl of her lips only caused your heart rate to increase.

handing the bouquet to her, and stealthily wiping your sweaty palms against your jeans, you try to muster a similar smile.

danielle grins widely as she accepts the bouquet before placing it into her ginormous bag that reminds you of doraemon’s pocket.

“how’d you know i like gardenias?”

“i…” you feel like lying, but maybe hiding the fact that you know of danielle’s crush caused enough guilt, “i asked haerin.”

shock appears evidently on danielle’s face.

“you talk to haerin?”

scratching the back of your neck, you shrug, “sometimes? she’s in some of my classes.”

danielle pouts.

the urge to take a photo of her is too strong, but you manage to resist it with sheer willpower and determination.

(you’re lying. you almost fainted.)

“ugh, she better not have told you any embarrassing stories about me!”

you reassure danielle with an awkward pat, “nope, we don’t talk very often. and she doesn’t really bring up anything you’ve said to her, danielle.”

the girl suddenly halts and stiffens up. you raise an eyebrow at her sudden frozen state. maybe you’ve offended her— should you apologise?

“can you call me jihye? it’s not that danielle isn’t okay— you can still call me dani! but y’know, jihye just sounds more…”

intimate is the word.

you send a comforting smile to her, “okay jihye.”

it must sound nice coming from you, if the way danie—no, jihye, blinks and then beams is any indication. it feels good saying her name too. it’s a little hilarious that a few weeks back, you didn’t even know her korean name.

“uh— okay! let’s go!” jihye shrieks. you like the fact that you’re aware of the effect you have on her now. it doesn’t feel like mere delusion anymore.

as you sit down in the cafe, jihye doesn’t say much. after ordering, you decide to take the initiative in starting a conversation. maybe you should start with something common; like your project!

“when are you free to finish our project?” you ask.

jihye turns to you, frowning, “have you asked minji and hanni for their help yet?”

you unintentionally wince at the mention of your friends.

“i don’t think they’ll be willing to do it,” you mutter, just thinking about hanni’s feelings and minji’s obliviousness.

“oh, then that’s okay! we can just do it ourselves, right?”

it’s pretty obvious what her intention is. but for the sake of humouring her (and because you fold everytime she speaks), you nod.

“maybe we can do it?”

the hint of hopefulness in her voice makes you want to nod your head repeatedly until it falls off.

god, maybe you are a little obsessed with her, if your palpitating heart was any indication.

“sure!” your voice comes out a little high-pitched and whinier than expected.

jihye only laughs it off. your cheeks flush red with embarrassment, but if jihye’s laughter was the result of your stupidity, you would gladly do it again to hear her.

“let’s just enjoy today first, we can always do it sometime later,” she says. you agree wholeheartedly (not because you’re whipped!) but today was your so-called date with her.

you smile back at her, with all the sincerity and adoration in the world. whilst jihye drinks her caramel macchiato with an ungodly amount of sugar, you take the opportunity to admire her features. her skin, basking in the sunlight, glimmering like edward cullen from twilight. you internally cringe at your own thoughts.

“is it good?” you ask after she lets out a satisfied sigh.

“mhm! want some?” her hand offers you her drink, the tip of the straw poking out stained with her lipstick. you gulp, thinking about how it would technically be an indirect kiss.

nodding, you take a sip.

“that’s really sweet,” you comment. jihye only laughs.

“i guess i just like sweet things,” she winks playfully and wiggles her eyebrows. it’s so ridiculous that it makes you erupt into laughter. the innuendo doesn’t go over your head either, it just makes you feel hazy, as if everything was a dream.

you quickly finish up your own pastry and offer jihye bites in between conversations. you learn that haerin was her first friend when she transferred from australia to korea, and that she tried out for the cheerleading team because the school mascot was cute. it’s an endearing reason that you can’t fault her with.

“let’s go now?” jihye asks. nodding, you quickly pay for your drinks and food, despite jihye’s protests. once outside, your hand itches to pull hers into a grasp. your fingers flex and adjust uncomfortably as you resist the urge to interlock your fingers. jihye only exclaims gleefully as you approach the dog cafe. a quaint little storefront with a cute wooden sign displaying a paw print.

your hand flies out to open the door for her chivalrously and jihye mumbles a bashful ‘thank you’. the moment you stepped foot inside, a chorus of barks resounded, only heightening jihye’s excitement. you watch as her eyes dart around the room, eagerly searching for the cute puppies. you’re whisked away by the staff, who’s wearing an adorable apron with a dog printed at the front.

“aww! y/n,” jihye tugs at your arm, pointing at the apron, “the uniform’s so cute! i would love to work here!”

your brain immediately imagines jihye, all sunshine and rainbows with the apron adorned on her body. yeah, you would visit the dog cafe every day if she worked here.

“we can come work here during our break,” you suggest.

“oh my gosh— yes!” she squeals. you’re dragged past the gate separating the dogs, and instantly, a tiny pomeranian jumps onto you. jihye just stares in awe at the various tiny dogs running around. and as the staff introduces the puppies, you cuddle up to the cream pomeranian called cookie.

“y/n…!” jihye shrieks, her eyes gleaming with adoration and you kind of notice the tears about to fall, “they’re all so adorable!”

cookie crawls into your lap and paws at your hands for you to rub his stomach. you do so as a maltese waddles up to jihye, its curious eyes staring at her.

jihye immediately falls to her knees and welcomes the maltese with open arms.

“this is the best day of my life,” she proclaims tearfully as another shih tzu pads towards her, sniffling her hand. you laugh at how easily jihye cries.

“you look really cute right now,” you say, using your free hand to take a couple of photos. jihye pouts, “i’m trying my best not to cry! but these puppies are just so cute!”

jihye takes out her own phone and continuously snaps pictures of the puppies pawing at her hand.

“thank you for bringing me here,” she suddenly sighs delightfully, “i’ve always wanted to come to a dog cafe.”

guilt gnaws at you as you’re reminded of why you even brought her out.

“you know me so well!” she exclaims.

oh fuck, you think. the only reason why you knew about her affinity for dogs and animals was because you stalked her tumblr page. it’s a heart wrenching devastation that tugs your heart to the bottom of your stomach. the guilt and shame clenches around your heart in a vice grip.

it doesn’t disappear for the rest of the day when jihye plays with the dogs. everytime your eyes landed on her, you felt mortified at your own actions. you shouldn’t have ever violated her privacy like that. just knowing that she liked you now, only drove the regret further in.

it’s a blaring realisation that jihye won’t want anything to do with you after you tell her.

but you can’t bear to keep it a secret anymore.

you keep your mouth shut for the remainder of the day. just to let jihye enjoy her time before you ultimately ruin it. she’s the happiest you’ve ever seen and it sucks, because you won’t get to see her like this ever again.

“are you walking me home?” jihye asks. you nod, not daring to even glance at her. it’s dark, and the streetlights don’t offer much protection for jihye.

(and it also gives you more time to spend with her.)

maybe she knows that you're nervous and upset, because she doesn’t start any conversation at all, choosing to instead hum various songs, filling in the blank silence. meanwhile, you mull the consequences of your actions. only when jihye reaches her front door, you decide to say something.

“hey…,” your mouth turns dry. the girl whips her head to you, “yeah?”

“i— i’m sorry,” you whisper. jihye tilts her head curiously, “what for? are you okay?”

the way she’s staring at you so concerned, you don’t deserve it at all. you don’t get to indulge in her care and affection after betraying her trust like that.

“i know about your tumblr page.”

jihye’s eyes widen considerably and a gasp escaped her lips.

“what…?”

your own eyes squeeze shut, afraid of her reaction, “and i know that you like me.”

there’s a few seconds of silence. you think she’s just taking it all in.

you use the opportunity of her shock to continue explaining, “i found out the day i stayed back to watch you practise. the tab opened by itself and i… i’m sorry… i just couldn’t help myself.”

jihye— did you even have the right to call her that anymore? one look at the girl had you crumbling into pieces internally, despite it being you who broke her trust.

“it was really shitty of me to do, and i don’t know why i did it,” you whisper, “but i like you. i really really like you, ever since i moved blocks. i know i’ve ruined things between us, and you might not forgive me, but i just couldn’t continue being your friend knowing i violated your privacy like that.”

danielle gapes at you, before her eyebrows furrow.

“tell me you’re joking.”

“i’m not, i’m sorry.”

“jeon y/n, are you serious?” it’s heartbreaking to hear danielle like this, so raw and vulnerable.

“jihye—”

her voice comes out, shooting like venom, “don’t call me that.”

you feel the onslaught of tears ready to fall.

“i’m sorry.”

you can’t even form a single coherent thought with danielle glaring at you like you’re worth nothing to her. you think of all the sweet messages she’s sent to you, cheerful encouragement she says throughout the day, the snacks she’s prepared for you. it’s all ruined. because of you.

all you do is ruin things.

masterlist | next

[httpsryu]

b.f.s (best friend's sister) pt. 1

pairing: mo jihye x fem!reader

summary: it was always a thing, noticing your best friend's older sister. ever since you were a young girl.

category: strangers-to-friends-to-lovers au

genre: fluff, slight angst (?)

warnings: JEALOUSY

a/n: thanks for the anon who requested this! i had so much fun writing this :)

'it's only a year in the name of love'; you tell yourself as you cannot help but to look at your best friend's older sister, jihye who walks past you two and into the kitchen to grab a quick snack.

sure, you know jihye would never return your feelings back (hell, she doesn't even know about them) but it never hurts to dream a little bit over the beyond, right?

"earth to y/n~" your best friend, mo maya hits your head with her pen to grab your attention.

HUH??

"was i zoning out again?" you ask with a grin, already knowing you were in fact daydreaming about mo jihye.

maya nods with her signature upside down smile. "if you keep zoning out, we'll never get done with this science homework."

why is sophomore year so hard? especially, with the dreadful chemistry homework the teacher is constantly assigning.

"you two alright over there?" jihye comes out from the kitchen, her hand holding a bowl full of strawberries. "do you need help?"

maya groans, shaking her head as she grips on the pen. "i want to try to do this myself."

"suit yourself." jihye shrugs, turning to you. "y/n, do you need any help?"

locking eyes with THE mo jihye has got to be one of the best dreams come true, yet alone, this moment of her talking to you is also another dream come true. you cannot help but to nod at the older, scooting over to make room for the other to sit besides you.

jihye lets out a small smile, placing her bowl on the table next to your books before sitting down on the floor.

"hmm, let's see." she leans just a bit closer to you, however, you could smell the florals and a slight sandalwood scent exhibiting from her. "ahh, i remember how to do this."

jihye opens her hand out, waiting for you to drop your pen in.

"huh?" you let out, about to put your own hand in.

the other girl can't help but to laugh at your cuteness. "silly, i meant your pen."

'fuck my life' you curse to yourself mentally, handing the pen to her while feeling heat rush upon your face.

jihye smiles at you, giggling a little bit at how adorable you looked.

'cute.' she can't help but to think to herself, looking at you with adoration. (like a little sister, of course)

maya groans again, constantly erasing the blank line which at this point, is no longer existing. "i need a small snack break, do you want anything, y/n?"

you look up at your best friend, shaking your head at her. "thank you though."

"anytime darling." maya sticks her tongue out, running off into their kitchen.

jihye scoots her bowl of strawberries to you. "your favorite strawberries! here, have some."

"oh. i'm okay, thank you unnie." you smile at the girl besides you.

the older nods, trying to ignore the slight sadness of you rejecting her strawberries by looking back down at the question. "okay, for this one, all you have to do is balance the redox reaction by..."

you blank out, zoning out as you look at the older girl's delicate yet strong features. from her dark yet stunning eyes, her precious moles, her delicate but very standing cheekbones and how her lips always had the pretty shine to them.

it's no fair for the entire universe because mo jihye simply exists.

"do you understand it now?"

HUH? OH-

you take a few seconds to process the fact that you just zoned out again. daydreaming about jihye in front of her! how embarrassing is that?

"ohh, i see!" you lie, hoping she would not question you about it further.

putting the pen down, jihye proudly grins. "great! if you need extra help on anything else, let me know. you already know where my room is so just knock and i'll be here."

"thanks unnie." you shyly say, looking down at your homework.

jihye can't pinpoint how you feel about her. do you not like her? she's always have tried becoming closer to you, ever since she met you while she was 8 and you were 7. now, you guys are 17 and 16.

surely, she would think that you two would've been closer by now, however, you seem to be a bit distance and precautious around her.

"oh. of-of course." jihye manages to say without sounding a bit too upset. "i'll see you around, y/n."

you watch as the love of your life descended up the stairs, letting out a dreamy sigh afterwards. "jihye unnie is so pretty."

however, each moment cannot go unwasted without another one of maya's groan.

"why is there never any ice cream left?" maya exclaims, shutting the freezer with a slam before coming out the kitchen with oreos and pretzels.

you wait, in the usual place where you'll see jihye past by ONCE daily throughout the whole school.

"can we just go now?" kyujin whines, begging to leave for lunch already.

you turn to her with a glare, prompting her to sigh and sit down on the stairs.

"let y/n get her daily one glimpse of jihye." eunchae defends you, scanning the halls for any sign of maya.

maya doesn't know, she never noticed at all. even when you two were children. and she never will know. liking mo jihye is a secret from maya because you know maya won't tolerate it.

but then again; love makes you crazy, right?

at least that's what eunchae argues.

"in 5,4,3,2,1..i see her!" you exclaim, watching from the end of the hallway of jihye walking out with some friends.

kyujin and eunchae looks at how smitten you are, giggling at the way your eyes fall in love with jihye.

"she looks amazing." you barely manage to let out, noticing the way her hair is tied up into a high ponytail, the uniform she wore today compliments her complexion, and the light gloss on her lips always sealed the day for you.

eunchae reaches to tap on your shoulder, exclaiming. "maya's coming over here."

you really don't want to keep this a secret from maya, but having a liking towards her older sister is something you know maya will never let go of.

"act normal, act normal." kyujin clears her throat, taking out her portable mirror to fix her bangs.

your best friend spots you from across the hall, waving at you as her eyes lit up with love.

"you guys know you don't have to wait for me every day, right?"

you shrug, grabbing her arm to hook with yours. "why wouldn't we?"

okay; maybe you were here to see jihye but waiting for maya is also a plus. killing two birds with one stone, right?

"okay, i am starving!" kyujin whines even more, stomping her feet.

jihye comes back from school, expecting to see both you and maya sprawled out in the living room as usual. however, upon opening the door, jihye is met with just her sister.

"oh? no y/n?" jihye asks, taking off her shoes.

the younger sister makes a weird incoherent noise (no surprise there). "a girl asked her out today."

stopping in her tracks of untying her laces, jihye looks up. "a girl?"

maya raises one of her brows up, brushing off the weird reaction from her sister. "yeahh..? she's new, i'm sure it's for help around the library since she works there with y/n now."

"oh. cool."

"yep! anyways, wanna hang out and go for some ice cream?" the younger turns off the t.v, hoping her sister would want to spend time with her today.

jihye contemplates, for a second, she wanted to say no and lock herself in her room to figure out who this new girl is but she ultimately nods. "just let me change out of the uniform and we can head out."

"awesome!" maya smiles excitedly, jumping off from where she was sitting earlier and rushing over to put her shoes on. "we can go to the new shop y/n keeps raving about."

y/n.

jihye does not understand why but her heart has a weird ting at the sound of your name. she wishes you were here to go out and enjoy ice cream with them. she wants you to acknowledge her, to get rid of that awkward weird air around you two.

but, she can't figure out how.

"you're paying, right sis?" the small glint in maya's eyes leads jihye to exclaim a loud laugh.

jihye pats the younger's head. "yes, my treat."

"awesome, i did NOT have any money to my name."

"why did miss. lee gave us so many boxes to sort through?" you grumble to haerin, stretching out your arms after sitting down for a long period of time. "she normally gives us two boxes MAX."

haerin makes a noise in agreement, however her eyes are focusing on you and only you. she loves when you wear that pink bow in your hair, it looks really pretty on you.

"how are you adjusting to school?" you curiously ask, getting up from the chair as you start to tidy up the back room of the library.

the raven-haired girl sighs, folding the boxes flat so it would be easy to recycle. "it's nice, it's just hard making friends."

"that's because you're a shy, quiet, pretty girl." you respond, returning to the middle table to pick up the new books to stack at the back. "i had to introduce myself to you first."

haerin feels her heartbeat racing again, very loudly too. "you think i'm pretty?"

"uh huh! you're cute too! maybe that's why people are intimated to come up to you, i get it though." you giggle, looking back at your friend. "you know, my friends have been telling me about how they've been wanting to become closer to you."

"i don't know about that..y/n.." haerin comes over to you, handing you another stack of new books. "it's just crowded, you know?"

haerin is a really introverted girl, you understand her.

"the vibes is getting depressing in here, haha." haerin giggles, looking at the time on her phone. "we finished pretty early, do you wanna go grab some ice cream? my treat."

at the sound of ice cream, you could've sworn you heard birds chirping a beautiful tune. "um yes!! there's this new shop that my brother and i go to often!"

"well, looks like we're going there." haerin smiles softly at the way you look excited, she can't help but to continue staring.

you laugh, scanning the room as fast as you could before grabbing your backpack. "everything looks good here! front desk looks good too."

"guess the ice cream is calling us." the raven-haired female slings her backpack around, waiting for you to link your arm with hers. "let's go."

jihye blinks. once. twice. and once more.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE WITH A GIRL?

"oo, looks like haerin is finally making her moves." maya giggles behind her hand, looking afar from the entrance of the ice cream shop. "aww, wait, they're kinda cute."

haerin. cute? moves?

jihye doesn't like the sound of this at all.

how old is this haerin girl anyways? is she senior or some college freshie? why is she even allowed to make moves on you?

why has maya not said anything about this haerin girl to her until now? you're like a younger sister to jihye too!

"so..this haerin girl in your grade or something?" jihye asks, pulling out her wallet as she scans the ice cream options.

cookies and cream. you love cookies and cream.

"yeah, she's really quiet." maya replies, her eyes onto both haerin and you. "but, y/n tells us that haerin actually talks and laughs a lot."

you do have that effect on people. jihye just wishes you were more like that with her. is it because she's maya's OLDER sister? jihye doesn't think the one-year age difference isn't the cause of it but could it?

"can i have on scoop of cookies and cream and one scoop of dark chocolate?" jihye gets her card out of her wallet, trying to not think too much of you.

maya giggles, seeing the way haerin's eyes are melting with adoration for you. "look at her! she's basically in love!"

"woah! you guys are too young for love." jihye says with a slight weirdness in her tone, handing the card to the cashier. "besides, you should be focusing on trying to pass chemistry."

maya groans in response. "UGHH, you're only a year older than us."

"besides, i don't think y/n's the type to like someone at the moment." jihye is telling herself a lie, she doesn't even know if you are or aren't interested in all that romance stuff so why does she get to say that about you?

the younger nods, agreeing with her sister. "true. but, haerin can change that hehe."

"oh please." jihye rolls her eyes, handing the scoop of dark chocolate to maya before returning to the worker. "thank you!"

maya scans where to sit, contemplating on scoping in on the date or giving you two privacy since she knows how haerin is as a person.

"let's leave those two alone." maya is about to walk off into a different direction before jihye grabs her wrist.

"wait, let's sit kind of far from them but enough to check out what's going on over there." the brunette haired squints her eyes at how haerin is offering a spoonful of her ice cream to you.

maya raises one of her brows up, AGAIN! why is her sister acting so weird right now?

"i think we should just sit somewhere us..." maya trails off, not wanting to make her sister upset.

the older one ignores the younger, already making her way to a seat that's close enough yet far to spy on both you and haerin. (jihye is just being an overprotective older sister, right? RIGHT?)

upon sitting down, jihye watches as you accepted the spoonful of ice cream from haerin.

"NO!" jihye screams, afraid of you perhaps getting sick from the shared germs.

maya sighs, facepalming herself as she tries to hide her face from you.

you hear a specific voice; well known voice to you, perhaps, your favorite voice. "jihye unnie?"

ehehehe; not me stopping on a cliffhanger :P

march 23rd, 2024; publishing date

[catslvrr]

you know all my dreams (you were one)

danielle marsh x fem!reader | one shot

Synopsis: Being a superhero involves a lot of saving, like saving people from burning buildings, saving cats stuck in trees, and even saving yourself from being evicted from your apartment. There’s one thing that you haven’t saved yet, and that’s your relationship with Danielle.

Contains: cursing, blood, violence, death, cliche hero stuff

You would like to believe that you are a good roommate.

But when you come tumbling through the window, landing with a raucous thud, all you have the strength to do is squeeze your eyes shut and pray to the heavens that your roommate graciously ignores you. Again.

This is the fourth time in a week that you have managed to enter your room in such a manner. You rely on the fact that your roommate is abnormally nocturnal and is most likely asleep by now.

You grimace as you remember that one time you accidentally crashed through her window, blacked out, and woke up to her grim face as she poked you with her foot. It wasn’t that far off from how she originally found out you were Spider-Woman two years ago.

It had been a rough day. You didn’t leave exactly scot-free after fending off the attempted escape of some maximum security prisoners at the Raft. 

This attempt may have been catalyzed by the recent blackout that you may have caused by fighting off another escape attempt, but who’s to say that’s the case?

Regardless, all escapees were given a scenic swing, free of charge, straight back to prison—a temporary one anyway. Now all you had to worry about was making it home in one piece.

By the time you reach home, the muscles in your arms giving in from the endless web-slinging, you don’t have enough energy in you to ease your landing (which really just meant trying to land on cool superhero poses). You swoop right onto the floor, face-down and limbs sprawled out like a measly bug helplessly trapped in a web.

You’re not entirely sure of the full extent of your injuries in the moment—mostly because of the way your whole body is burning, reminiscent of the building you were thrown into, but you’re pretty confident you have at least multiple bruised ribs, a black eye, and a mild concussion. 

“So, all things considered,” you say half-heartedly to no one in particular. “Not too bad.”

(Future note: You actually also had one fractured toe.)

You’re happily drifting off into unconsciousness, with nothing but the belated, slightly panicked thought of whether you locked your door or not, when three sudden strikes at your door jolt you awake.

Suppressing a groan, you roll over and pull yourself up as best as possible, ignoring the way your ribs scream at you. God, you were in so much pain. You let out a breathy exhale and even muster a crooked smile, even though you know your roommate can’t see you.

“Roomie! What’s up?”

A pause. 

You cringe. Seriously, ‘Roomie’? You should’ve gone with the name you saw on the leasing contract.

(When you first saw it, you thought that the lease was some sort of scam, because your roommate’s signature looked like someone trying to draw Australia from memory. Upon further questioning of the landlord, you were left with the information that your new roommate, Haerin, was indeed real.)

Before you can even apologize for your lame attempt at a greeting, Haerin’s response comes curtly.

“There was a crash.”

You pick up on a slight inflection of curiosity in Haerin’s tone—is glad that despite her nosiness, she didn’t decide to barge in and see you in your full Spider-suit glory. You force out a chuckle, hoping your roommate doesn’t notice the strain.

“Oh—right. I just fell. Tripped over my own feet. I mean, while dancing. Well. Trying to, you know?” 

Your embarrassment grows with every word that bumbles out of your mouth, and when the heat in your cheeks is too much to bear, you manage out a simple:

“Yep,” to eloquently finish it all off. You cross your fingers and hope your roommate doesn’t question the fact that there is no music playing at all.

You barely hear a non-committal hum over the pounding in your ears, and only release your breath when you hear the familiar obnoxious typing of keys, finding your heartbeat in tandem with its rhythm.

There are some things you can always depend on, and one of those things is Haerin’s perpetual typing as she attempts to finish her journalism assignments at the last minute. The incessant clicking of the keyboard gradually becomes soothing, almost therapeutic. You pass out before you can even register any sliver of drowsiness.

And then you wake up to a deafening bang and splinters of your doors ricocheting toward you. 

Reflexively, you flick your wrist, effectively webbing any stray pieces of your door to the ceiling. But you also web your roommate’s face. There are a few seconds of silence as you both just stare at each other.

“Funny how you find me in my Spider-Woman cosplay,” you chuckle awkwardly. “Because I’m not, you know, Spider-Woman.”

Haerin slowly peels the web off her face, face wholly impassive, still menacingly holding the ax. “I’m hungry. Buy me Wingstop.”

It takes you an hour to get the Wingstop back home. Ten minutes was dedicated to a mini meet-and-greet.

“What the fuck, Haerin,” you say with a mouth full of lemon pepper fries. “You broke my door down with an ax.”

“I was hungry,” she replies matter-of-factly, as if that’s a reasonable justification for the insane property damage she just inflicted. “But you were also not responding for sixteen hours.”

“I was out for sixteen hours?”

“A bit of an exaggeration. Maybe around 10.”

“Why do you even have an ax anyway?”

“Look at where we live,” Haerin clicks her tongue. “And you being Spider-Woman just slaps a big target on our backs.”

“Pause,” you raise your hand and stop chewing. “I’m not Spider-Woman. I’m just… a huge fan.”

Haerin’s exasperated eyes flicker to yours.

“I’m serious!”

“Yeah right,” she scoffs. “You make way too many spider puns.”

“Like what?”

“Like ‘I’ll swing by’, or ‘I’m kinda tangled up in something right now’,” she explains with air quotes.

You noisily take a sip of a lemonade you bought from a random stall. “Huh.”

“So,” you chew thoughtfully. “Hypothetically, if I was Spider-Woman, how would you react? Would you tell anyone?”

Haerin scans you, still wearing the Spider-suit, sitting cross-legged on the sofa, ungracefully shoving chicken tenders in your mouth with ranch dribbling down your chin. “I’ve known for, like, three months.”

You almost knock the ranch cup over in shock. “What?”

You swallow the chicken tender too quickly, and have to take a breather because you almost choke on it. “How—I mean, why would you think that?”

“You discarded one of your broken web-shooters in my room.”

“Oh. That’s where it went,” you scratch your cheek. “So… you won’t tell anyone, right?”

Haerin smiles. “Only if you pay for the door.”

You hear the screeching of a chair against the floor, hear the imposing footsteps headed toward your room. You feel something poke you. It’s probably the handle of that stupid ax she’s so attached to.

“You good?”

You respond with an unintelligible noise.

Another poke. “Rent’s due soon, you know.”

You roll over with a groan and pull off your mask. “Spare me some sympathy, I’m dying.”

“No you’re not. You’ve had worse.”

Haerin squats down to your level and dabs a cut on your forehead, leaving a burning sting. “Ow!”

You stay mum as Haerin wipes your face free of grime and blood. It’s rare, but when Haerin patches you up, there’s a tinge of gratefulness that twists your heart, and you know it’s better to leave it unspoken. That’s just how you two are.

You break the silence after a while. “I really need to find a job, don’t I?”

“I’ve been thinking about that,” Haerin replies. “I think you should start your own business: Spider-Eats.”

“Like… Uber Eats?”

“Exactly,” Haerin nods proudly. “But you don’t need to pay for gas, because you just swing over. And I’m sure people will tip you because you’re Spider-Woman.”

“Huh. That’s actually a really good idea.”

As you shuffle out of your Spider-suit and wince at the way your bloody clothes stick to yourself, you make a mental note to start designing and coding a Spider-Eats app. And to also do laundry again. You languidly stretch your limbs, trying to ignore the aches and pains.

“Thanks, doc,” you grin at Haerin. “I feel better already.”

Haerin nods and walks out to the living room. You hear some faint rustling, and the smell reaches you first: pepperoni pizza. You can practically hear an orchestra of trumpets and horns and trombones sing as Haerin re-enters your room, like an angel from heaven, holding three boxes of pizza. It’s even from the same parlor joint the two of you always loiter around.

“Wait,” you pull a can of grape Fanta out of her hand and toward you with a web. “I’ve always wanted to try something.”

Haerin watches as you dangle from the ceiling upside-down and crack open the can. You bring it to your mouth and attempt to drink it, only for you to choke and spill it on your floor.

“Oops.”

After that sad display, you both find yourselves in a familiar position: sitting cross-legged on the floor across from each other, absolutely devouring the food you’ve chosen to be a victim to your outrageous appetite. It comes with being a superhero.

“Seriously, Haerin,” you sigh in satisfaction. “I love you so much.”

You and Haerin mostly eat in silence and scroll on your phones until all three boxes are demolished. You pack up all the boxes and push them to the side, flopping into a starfish position and feeling bloated already.

“You know,” Haerin starts, her voice surprisingly sincere. “Tomorrow’s the day.”

You slowly exhale. “Yeah.”

She flops down beside you. The two of you stare at the LED strips (set to red and blue) that you both went to hell and back trying to tape on the edges of the ceiling.

“Do you want me to come with you?”

You offer a small smile. “Nah. You know how it is.”

The two of you lie there for a while until you both fall asleep.

Unfortunately, being a superhero is not all glitz and glamor. You find yourself to be quite the average Joe, living an ordinary life. At the end of the day, you’re just an engineering college student with no job. Well, besides the occasional side gig of being a masked vigilante.

You tend to relish the mundane moments these days, and maybe it’s the age. (Haerin would roll her eyes if she heard you say this.) Those fleeting moments where you can bask in the serenity of a night without any pings from the local police database you hacked into, although often only lasting several minutes, are valuable to you. Sitting on rooftops and indulging in the view that is the city skyline at night—you never get sick of it.

You used to hate this—being human, that is. After the bite all those years ago, being Spider-Woman was riveting. The novelty of your superpowers made you feel competent. Made you feel like someone. (Only after you persevered through the beginner's clumsiness.) Of course, there are the not so great parts of still being human. Like attending mandatory labs, dealing with group project partners who go M.I.A., and the exorbitant rental rates. Regardless, you believe the good still outweighs the bad.

But like most good things in your life, they never stay. How foolish of you, to think that your newfound powers could somehow transcend the inevitability of pain and loss. If anything, you face it more now. 

That youthful naivety led to more trouble than you can handle. That night when you swung past that robbery at the bodega, without a care in the world, unwittingly sealing the fate of your aunt. Any last connection you had to your family was violently torn from your grasp.

It was your fault. And nothing can change that. It haunts you every waking hour of the day, manifests itself as a wicked virus, and its suffocating tendrils latch onto you on the nights when you’ve delved too deep into your own thoughts.

You try to block it out now, but the best you can do is repeat to yourself that it’s a reminder. A reminder of who Spider-Woman has to be and what she means to the city. An unwavering hero who stands for justice and protects everyone. A hero who does the right thing.

You hum to yourself as you push the door open with your shoulder, exiting the shop with a bouquet of pale purple forget-me-nots. You shove your hands into the front pocket of your hoodie after adjusting your backpack, slightly shivering at the crisp chill of the early morning.

You greet the local store owners as you pass by, even giving a hand in moving crates or supplies to help set up shop. It would be so much easier to just swing to the cemetery, but there’s a sense of reverence you feel you need to uphold, and the only way to do that is just to visit as yourself. No mask, no secret identity. Just you.

You’ve just crossed the threshold to the cemetery with one step when there’s a prickling sensation on your skin. As you get closer to her grave, the discomfort only grows, and so you swing to the nearest tree and perch yourself there.

And then you see her. In the flesh.

“Danielle?” You whisper to yourself, dumbfounded. What was she doing back here, after all these years?

Danielle stills for a moment, and so do you. She turns around and eyes the surroundings as if she heard your voice. You duck and burrow yourself deeper within the leaves.

You observe her quietly, donning her own bouquet of roses, and you smile wryly at the sight of them. Of course, she remembers her favorite flowers. Danielle sits at the grave for a while, her lips moving as if talking, but the music blasting in your headphones blocks it out. You don’t try to eavesdrop.

She’s dyed her hair blonde now, and you didn’t think it possible, but she stands out even more. The color suits her—it matches her personality, akin to a warm and inviting sunflower. Seeing her treat the grave with such care and tenderness makes your heart pang. You grip the tree branches tighter to try to steel yourself, swallowing the guilt and heartache that arises. You don’t expect anything less from her. She’s still so kind and loving even after what you did.

She takes out a small pouch, eventually settling down and crocheting. You’re surprised for some reason, but you also make yourself comfortable in the tree. Even though you’re a hundred feet apart, being in the same vicinity of her fills your body with a sense of repose. You allow yourself to believe that you’re sitting next to each other, still friends, grieving together, and you think that helps you heal a bit.

Half an hour passes before you feel a droplet hit your face. And then another. You and Danielle look up at the same time, only to see the billowing clouds roll in.

Without a second thought, you slip your mask on and shimmy out of your clothes, fishing an umbrella out of your backpack before webbing it to the tree. You clear your throat as you land behind her, as gently as possible so as to not scare her.

“Need this, Miss?” You forcefully deepen your voice, holding out the umbrella above Danielle’s head.

She turns around, lips slightly parted in shock, and it takes all your willpower to not visibly tremble.

“Thank you,” she smiles sweetly. You wonder if she would greet you like this if she knew who you really were. “Let me give you something in return.”

Danielle hands you a crochet ribbed beanie, a bright red just like the roses she brought, with a white pom pom on top.

“This one took me a few days.”

It’s incredibly endearing, but you’re panicking at her presence so you can only express your gratitude with an awkward, “Thanks!”, voice crack included, before slinging to the nearest building. 

You make sure to wear it on the way home.

Haerin notices it as soon as you return.

“What’s with the new look?” She asks, not looking away from her laptop.

You set an iced Americano for her on the coffee table, and then proceed to drape yourself on the sofa, feet nudging Haerin’s side to annoy her. She chooses to ignore you rather than resort to violence only because you bought her coffee. She also chooses to ignore how your suit is still wet from the rain outside, droplets of water permeating the sofa. You take off the beanie, making sure to gently lay it on the table before slipping your mask off.

You rest your head against the arm of the sofa and close your eyes, but all you can think about is Danielle. The sincerity in her eyes as she gifted you the beanie and her saccharine voice rings out in your mind. You lay there and reminisce in silence for a while. You end up falling asleep for a few minutes.

Then Haerin wakes you up.

“Hey.” She slaps your foot. “Answer my question.”

“What—oh.” You mumble in confusion, trying to regain your senses. “I saw… someone at the cemetery.”

She finally turns to give you a deadpan expression. “Be more specific. A ghost? One of your many archnemeses?”

“Worse,” you rub your face tiredly. “Danielle.”

Her typing pauses. “Wait, the childhood best friend you told me about?”

“Yeah.”

“The one you ghosted?”

You sigh. “Yeah.”

“The one you pitifully pine over?”

“Well—yeah.”

Haerin lets out a low whistle. “She gave you that?”

“Yeah,” you murmur. “She didn’t know it was me.”

“You should keep it that way,” Haerin says. “It’d suck to open up old wounds after so long.”

“I know.” You puff your cheeks out. “And that’s not even the end of it. I spent forty bucks on flowers just to leave it to rot in a backpack in a tree.”

She glances at the wet puddle you created on the couch. “We can go back tomorrow and get it?”

“It’s okay,” you reply, opening your eyes to the pouring rain outside. You hope Danielle made it home okay. “I’m gonna wait for the rain to die out a bit and then head out again to investigate that weird case. I’ll put the flowers where they belong on the way there.”

“Is there a new lead?” You can practically hear Haerin’s ears perk up.

“Yeah, all the reports of the disappearances seem to pop up in the same area. I just checked for a location that shares an equal distance to all of them and came up with an abandoned warehouse.”

Haerin sits in thought for a second before asking, “Can I come with? You know how the college blog always relies on me for Spider-Woman content.”

“Fine.” You begrudgingly acquiesce. “Only if you get a cool shot of me.”

Haerin takes out her camera and snaps a quick photo of you.

“How about this?” She turns the camera around to show you the result.

You scoff in offense. “Seriously?”

“Is it not flattering enough?” Haerin teases, wrestling the camera away from you.

“I look like a wet dog!”

You web the camera to yourself and delete the photo.

“Stop abusing your powers.” Haerin clicks her tongue. “Go web a towel to clean this mess up.”

“What a coincidence,” you cheerfully ignore her. “The rain’s stopped.”

Like a miracle, the rain has cleared out, the darker clouds making way for the sun. You web a towel to dry your suit (but not the couch or floor) and slip your mask back on again.

“Alright,” you step out onto the balcony and turn to Haerin. “You want a ride there? Uber? Spuber…?”

“Let’s just stick to Spider-Eats.”

“Yeah.”

“And, no thanks,” she winces. “You almost swung into a pole last time.”

“Oops,” you say with no sign of regret. “Anyway, I texted you the coords. Meet you there.” 

You hop on the balcony railing and salute Haerin before proceeding to fall backwards with your hands behind your head. The rush as you swing through the city is unmatchable. You savor the wind rushing against you, the boisterous noise of cars honking and mindless chatter zooming in and out of your ears.

You’re back at the cemetery in no time, and after checking if anyone’s around, you stand before your aunt’s grave once again. Danielle’s roses are still lying there. You wipe some raindrops off the headstone before laying your bouquet down. Then, you’re off again. There’ll be time for that later.

The abandoned warehouse is not too far from the docks, a very typical location for people who are up to no good. You perch on the roof of a building opposite it, where Haerin is already squatting and taking photos. You can spot her motorcycle stationed in the parking lot behind the building. She barely flinches as you tap her shoulder.

“How did you get up here?”

“A good journalist never reveals her secrets.”

“Isn’t it ‘sources’?”

Haerin shrugs. “Same thing.”

You squat next to her. “So… did you notice anything before I came?”

“I did some research. Think this warehouse is registered under the name of just Jace.”

“Just Jace? That’s such a sick name.”

Haerin doesn’t bother to correct you.

“Name doesn’t ring a bell though.” You squint and scan the seemingly innocuous warehouse. “And I’m not picking up any heat signals… looks like nobody’s home.”

“How are we getting in?”

“This is a job for Spider-Woman!” 

You leap off the roof and swing around the warehouse, sweeping the perimeter to search for a way in. 

“There’s always an entrance when you can climb walls,” you muse to yourself.

You open up a voice channel as you crawl up the side of the warehouse, eventually reaching the roof where there is a conveniently open skylight. “Bingo!”

“Psst, Haerin,” you say. “There’s an open window on the roof.”

“Awesome,” she replies, although you note that her tone lacks excitement. “Can you get in and open the door for me?”

“The door?” You peer inside the open skylight. “You mean the gigantic sliding doors?”

“Don’t tell me you’re too weak to open those.”

“No,” you huff. “It’s just that… wouldn’t it be too loud?”

Haerin’s response is reluctant. “I guess.”

“You know what that means,” you sing-song. “It’s time for a Spuber ride!”

There’s some silence followed by a long sigh.

“I thought we agreed to not use that anymore,” she grumbles. “Hurry up and get back here.”

Haerin’s pick up and drop off is quick and easy, much to both of your satisfaction. You asked her to give you a five star rating, to which she replied, “That took literally less than thirty seconds.”

Inside the warehouse is dark, with only some dim flickering lights providing you with a shadowed view of the interior. The warehouse is stocked with looming cargo containers.

“Seems pretty filled for an abandoned warehouse,” Haerin muses, her voice echoing in the void. The silence feels foreboding, which makes you glad that Haerin asked to come, not that you would ever admit that.

“There’s gotta be something here,” you run your hand over the undulating surface of the steel containers. “A secret room, or some complicated contraption.”

“What about that?” Haerin points at a scrape mark on the floor in front of one of the containers, which coincidentally matches the circumference of a quarter circle.

“Oh. That was fast.”

You walk over and tug on the latch, before pulling the door open.

“No worries,” you strain out. It’s heavier than you thought. “Leave it all to me.”

“If you say so,” Haerin says with a smug smile on her face, standing there with no care in the world.

Once you finally get it open, inside the container is a set of stairs that lead downwards to an ominous tunnel.

“Totally not creepy,” you laugh nervously and gesture to Haerin. “Ladies first?”

She rolls her eyes before making her way down. The tunnel is fairly well-kept and it’s not long before you find yourselves in the secret room. It’s a lab, wires running hazardously on the ground, bits and pieces of machinery scattered on tables and filling up boxes, and computer screens displaying complex data and research.

“Okay,” you drawl. “Kinda getting evil mastermind vibes.”

You ruffle through some papers lying around. It seems to be sketches of some cylinder machine with cogs and complicated wiring in it. After inspecting the lab for a bit longer, you both come to the same conclusion.

“He’s trying to time travel,” Haerin notes as she snaps some shots of the lab.

You nod. “His experiments are probably what’s causing all those people to disappear into thin air.”

“What were the statements of the witnesses again?”

“Like the victims were just sucked into an invisible portal.”

Haerin pulls up some files on one of the computers. “It makes sense. It looks like he’s trying to time travel to the year his daughter died.”

You both are silent at this information. Until that silence is broken by a screeching sound outside, one that oddly sounds like the gigantic sliding doors opening.

The two of you immediately break out into a sprint and up the stairs. You don’t hesitate to scoop up Haerin once you’re out of the container and soar up to the roof with a web.

“He’ll know someone was here,” Haerin whispers.

“I know,” you sigh. “Hopefully it won’t lead to anything. We’ll have to come back later.”

Like the true neighborhood-friendly Spider-Woman you are, you give Haerin a Spuber ride back to her motorcycle. She revs the engine once to get your attention, then bids you farewell with a teasing “Race you home!” as she accelerates into the distance.

“So not fair!” You shout out at her retreating figure, swinging to catch up. You’re straining your arms to keep up with Haerin’s motorcycle, but a police car passes by with sirens on, and you know what you need to do. At the last second, you snap your left wrist to make a breakneck turn. Haerin will understand.

You can barely keep your eyes open as Minji nudges you with her elbow.

“Late nights playing 2K again?” The image of her stupid grin floats by in your mind.

“Something like that,” you whine, flicking your head up so your lab goggles fall on your nose. “I should’ve skipped today.”

Minji pulls up the DXF files you made for the project and resumes with the task of readjusting the ratio of some gears. “You don’t even need your lab goggles for today.”

“I look smarter with them on.”

“Yeah, right.” Minji peeks at your rough outlines of the gearbox transmission on paper. Some edges are ripped and it’s crinkled under your folded arms. “Damn. When are you gonna digitize that and render it?”

You slump back in your chair and close your eyes. “When I get a good night’s rest.”

“So, never.”

“Yeah.”

“The assignment’s due next week.”

“Yeah.”

“I hate you.” But she doesn’t. Because the two of you have been lab partners ever since you tripped on her lab coat in class a year ago and knocked over a bunch of her circuits and wires, which, to this day, she still blames you for, which is ridiculous, because who on earth owns a lab coat long enough to the point where it spills on the floor? But, you digress. Her lab coat is now properly tailored.

You’re half a second from drooling and snoring when there’s that prickling sensation on your skin again, and the hairs on the back of your neck shoot up, leaving you with that sinking feeling in your stomach. You sit up so abruptly that you almost slam your forehead onto the table.

Minji’s arm flies in front of your chest to steady you. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” you stammer. “I just… need to go to the bathroom.”

You grab your backpack and sprint out of the lab, navigating yourself to the nearest exit. You’re on the roof of the building in no time, in your suit, and you immediately see what’s wrong. There’s a man in the middle of campus, floating above the ground, and whatever objects are around seem to be gravitating toward him. The objects begin to orbit around him, creating a mini tornado.

You try to call Haerin, but she doesn’t pick up. You try to call Minji too, but no luck. Your stomach coils with anxiety. You don’t have long to dwell on it though.

As objects slam into one another, students begin to file out of class and understandably panic. Campus security is screaming and directing people to emergency exits, but the whirlwind only gets worse and things are smashing into windows and buildings.

“This isn’t good,” you mutter, immediately diving into action. You web benches, bicycles, poles, and trees in all sorts of directions to disrupt their trajectory toward anyone. Out of the corner of your eye, you see a blur of orange amidst green, and hear a very distinct meow.

“Tiko!”

You hurtle yourself toward the flying tree and narrowly shoot through the branches, successfully grabbing Tiko. You were going to plop him down somewhere safe, but it seems he had other plans, because he crawls into your backpack and nestles inside it, sticking his head out.

“Hang tight, Tiko,” you scream, swinging toward the mystery man. “I’m going to stop this!”

The man now stands on a rooftop, the debris around him thrashing against the building which is threatening to fall apart. You land not too far from him.

“Hi!” You yell over the deafening winds.

He whips his head around, raising his palm to hurl a rock at you. “Stay away!”

“Wait!” It narrowly misses you as you skillfully duck just in time. “You’re Just Jace, right?”

“How do you know my name?” He falters for a second, taking a step back. “…And it’s just Jace.”

“Isn’t that what I just said?” You mumble to yourself in confusion.

You shake your head to focus on the situation at hand. “Please stop this, Just Jace. You’re hurting others!”

“I… I know!” Jace’s hands tightly grip his hair in frustration. “I don’t know why it’s not working.”

As his ire flames up, so do the winds, dust and small rocks starting to obscure your vision.

“Please, calm down!” You desperately yell, slowly making your way toward him with arms raised as a sign of peace. “Let me help you!”

The sound of police sirens grows louder, and you can hear the whirring of helicopter blades behind you. The police helicopter sways in the midst of the tornado, and you fear for both Jace and the police.

“No, no, no!” You try to wave the police away, knowing their presence would only distress Jace more.

“Police! Hands in the air!”

Police officers begin to rappel down from the helicopter, guns aimed at Jace. He scrambles in fear, sending rubble hurling at them in defense. Bullets fly out immediately after.

The sound of gunshots rings through your ear as you expertly maneuver through the ricochets and try to keep everyone safe. You burst through the combat and tackle Jace whilst he’s busy with the officers, trying to Spuber him to somewhere safe.

He wrestles in your grasp, screaming at you to let him go. Tiko gives him a few smacks in response. As you swing through a window, you release your hold on him, both of you rolling over to catch your balance. 

You lean against the wall, taking a moment to catch your breath. You’re rubbing your head that’s throbbing in pain, not noticing Jace’s sudden silence.

“The police really have the worst timing, am I right?” You awkwardly laugh.

You look up to see Jace stalking toward you, like a predator to prey, a dark intensity in his eyes. Any trace of the Jace you encountered before is gone. You bounce on your feet immediately.

“Jace?” You say hesitantly, walking backward. “We can talk about this…”

“You broke it,” he snarls. That’s when you notice what he’s clasping onto so stiffly. It looks awfully similar to those sketches you and Haerin saw in that secret lab. He lets it go and it clatters on the floor.

“I didn’t mean to,” you try to ameliorate the situation. “I was trying to save you.”

Your pleas don’t seem to reach his ears. He just simply repeats, “You broke it.”

“No need to get so upset,” you laugh sheepishly, hands in the air, discreetly scanning for the nearest exit. “I know a really good tech support guy.”

Your skin tingles. Jace then lunges at you, and out of instinct, you web onto the broken device and you swing it around to slam it into the space between you and him. The device makes contact with the concrete and shatters into pieces, shards of glass flying everywhere. For a moment, you feel as if time has slowed down, and everything sounds muffled, like you’re sinking deeper and deeper into the ocean.

And then everything goes black.

You wake up with a gasp, cold sweat sticking to your body. Haerin steps back, surprised. She’s holding her beloved ax, its handle hovering dangerously close to your cheek.

“You’re awake.”

“What?” You look around frantically, hands squeezing the sofa. “How am I back here?”

“What do you mean?” Haerin frowns. “You fell asleep.”

You stand up and squish your face against the window. The college campus is untouched. “What happened to Just Jace? Is Tiko alright?”

Her eyebrow furrows. “Who’s Just Jace? And Tiko the campus cat?”

You don’t respond, still lost in your own thoughts.

“Did you get a concussion on the way to the cemetery?”

You stop pacing and look down, and sure enough, you’re still in your suit, wet from the rain just like two days ago, and the beanie Danielle crocheted is lying on the table.

Then it dawns on you.

“Oh my god, Haerin.” Your jaw is slack. “I just traveled back in time.”

“What.”

It takes you fifteen minutes to sum everything up.

“But the weird thing is that the device didn’t seem to be done when we were in the secret lab.” You bite your cheek in thought. “I don’t know how he would’ve been able to get it working in the next two days.”

“He probably knew someone was onto him when we left the door open,” Haerin says, searching up ‘If you travel back in time, will you break time and space if you get into contact with someone?’ on Google. Most of the results are fruitless.

“That makes sense,” you nod. “But I wonder why he would end up at our college campus out of all places.”

“Maybe it’s the college his daughter went to?”

“Right,” you nod again. You prop your laptop on your lap as you start scouring through the map of the area around the college. “I need to know where he first appears so I can stop him before he gets to campus.”

Haerin ponders for a second. “You mentioned that there was some research on nuclear fusion, right?”

“Yeah… hold on.” You zoom into a nuclear power plant just a few miles from the college. “The device must need a lot of energy to work. He probably got it from here.”

“So,” Haerin hums. “What’s the plan?”

“Don’t worry about it.”

Haerin’s voice is unimpressed over the static. “This was your plan?”

“You know me,” you quip ironically while weaving in between the blasts of energy that Jace is throwing at you. “My plan was to come up with a plan now.”

“And have you thought of one?”

“Not really!” You coolly avoid his punches and slide in between his legs. “I’ll call you back!”

When you manage to catch Jace off guard with a roundhouse kick, he stumbles and you use the opportunity to swoop into a vent to hide. You did not expect this alternate version of Jace to be so hostile. You tried to talk to him, really.

(You lower your web bit by bit as you dangle upside-down behind Jace. His back is facing you, clearly focused on wiring his device to the generator.

You tap his back. “Hey.”

He swivels around so fast he almost loses his balance, but immediately regains it and squares up. “Stay away!”

“No, no.” You plop on the floor. “I’m not here to hurt you. I know you’re trying to time travel. I’m from the future, actually.”

There’s an air of hope in Jace’s voice. “The device worked?”

“About that,” you rub your nape and flash an embarrassed smile under the mask. “I kinda had to smash it onto the ground for it to work. You were kind of trying to kill me. But no biggie, I forgive easily!”

Jace narrows his eyes. You stiffen as you feel dread trickle into your stomach. His fist jerks out and you jump back just in time, feeling the wind from the blow brush against your face.

“What the hell, man?” You pout. “I literally just forgave you.”

He doesn’t waste time and continues with a flurry of punches. “I must’ve been attacking you for a reason.”

You shake your head as you roll to the side. “Don’t say I didn’t try to be nice.”)

“Come out and face me!” Jace yells, his voice reverberating throughout the power plant. “You’re nothing but a pest.”

You silently crawl out of the vent and onto a supporting beam. Once you’re positioned right above him, you web him up, landing a nasty uppercut. You don’t have time to celebrate though, because on the way down, he grabs your ankles and pulls you down back to Earth.

“Oof!”

“This ends now.” He hisses, blood dripping from his mouth. He charges toward you, bearing a metal rod in his hand.

“Really getting into the villain role now, huh?” You joke, voice strained as you leap off the ground and kick him square in the face. “Give me some time to think of a name for you.”

You side step another one of his tackle attempts. “Oh! How about Prime Time?”

The only response you get is Jace surging forward with more punches and kicks. “You could just say you don’t like it!”

Jace doesn’t deign you with an answer. He unexpectedly throws a crate toward you, and just as you duck to avoid it, he gets his revenge with a successful blow to your chest with the metal rod.

You slam against the wall, slumping as the wind is knocked out of you.

“Like I said,” Jace says with heavy breaths, towering over you and looking down with a sneer. “This ends now.”

You can only see his silhouette because of the light shining through from the entrance to the power plant behind him, and this gives you an idea. You muster up any remaining willpower and web onto two pillars, pulling yourself toward it and using the momentum to swing kick Jace.

You both fly through the air and outside the power plant, crashing on the roof of a passing car. You wince as you feel the dent in the car. Jace rolls down to the hood of the car. Logically, the driver starts steering off course because the windshield is blocked and they’re probably freaking out at the fact that there are two injured people on their car.

Your body moves before your mind processes what’s going on—you’re webbing people out of the way of the speeding car, even though you’re still lying on your side. But the car spins out of control too fast for you to react. It ends up ramming into the front of a cafe. The impact of the crash sends you flying into the glass wall and into the cafe. You’re getting deja vu: glass is shattered and people start screaming and running away. 

“Oh no,” you groan, trying to ignore the burning pain. “This will not look good in the press release.”

What’s also burning is the car that you’re pinned under—the heat from the crackling fire licking at you, so hot that you can feel it through the spandex. All you can see is the thick smoke that blankets the cafe. From the shadows emerges Jace.

“Please,” you wheeze, feeling like you’ve been hit by a train. Which actually happened once, an experience you wouldn’t recommend to anyone. “This isn’t what your daughter would’ve wanted.”

“Don’t mention her again.” He digs his boot into the car, forcing pressure on you, and you’re exerting all your muscles in your arms to hold the car up. “And some superhero you are. Look at what’s left of this place.”

You strain your neck to stare at the inside of the cafe, and the sight horrifies you. It’s a complete wreckage. Your eyes zero on blonde hair that peeks out under a table that’s been flipped over. Your blood runs cold and there’s a sharp pain in your gut, like a knife sickly twisting itself over and over again. 

Jace chuckles cruelly at your silence. “What, no more snarky remarks?”

She can’t be dead. It’s all your fault—you were too busy slinging people out of the way to notice where the car was headed. How did she not get out in time?

“No,” you choke out. Your lip trembles pathetically. “Turn back time. Please.”

He follows your gaze and smirks. “See someone you know? I guess now you know how it feels.”

Any empathy you felt for him is overridden by the sheer anger that engulfs you. Your body shakes with rage. What comes out next is guttural and raw.

“I’ll kill you,” you spit. “I’ll fucking kill you.”

Jace turns around and cackles, and you wonder how everything went to hell so fast. You wonder how he changed so fast. He’s walking out of the cafe, to the college campus probably, and as much as you want to grab him and beat him until he’s blue, there’s something more important. Or rather, someone.

The adrenaline from the rage earlier is still coursing through your veins and you use your remaining strength to push the car off you. (You wanted to hurl it at him too but your arms were failing). You know exactly what you need to do. You sling a web to the device he’s holding loosely, then repeat that same swinging motion that you did the other timeline, slamming it so hard on the ground you almost feel like your arm will rip off.

Time slows again, and you find yourself in a familiar position, deep in the abyss. The world goes black.

It takes you three times before you realize you’re stuck in a time loop. You don’t know why, but you only get sent back a few hours to the nuclear power plant. You try everything, anything to keep Danielle safe. You know it’s selfish, that you should be caring about everyone else too, but you can’t stand the thought of her dying. You’ve already lost her once, back then when you left her. You can’t be the reason for the world losing her.

In the first loop, you spray the wheels of the car with webs to prevent it from crashing in the first place, but the car stopping in the middle of the road only causes another car to veer off the streets and into the cafe. In the second loop, Jace hurls a boulder mid fight and despite you redirecting it to the building next to the cafe, that building ends up collapsing… on top of the cafe. Everytime, you saving other people leads to Danielle dying in some way.

It’s the third loop. You’re at the nuclear power plant again, head in your hands, and Jace hasn’t noticed your presence yet. You want to cry. Nothing is working. Maybe this is karma for ghosting Danielle all those years ago. Being a superhero is all about sacrifices—is this the sacrifice you have to make? You thought you would be better at letting go by now.

Haerin’s voice is soft in your ear. “Have we had this conversation before?”

“Yeah,” you sigh. “This is the fourth time.”

“I’m sorry I can’t remember. And that our solutions didn’t work out.”

“Don’t apologize. You’re the only thing keeping me sane right now.” You bite your lip. “And it’s my fault anyway.”

There’s some faint rustling of paper and typing.

“Nuclear fusion,” Haerin says after a while. “Have you tried slamming the device into the generator? The sheer energy might just break the loop.”

“I might as well.” Your voice is thick with fatigue. “I have nothing else to lose.”

You don’t even bother to greet Jace this time, just immediately pulling the device toward you and slamming it onto the generator. The reaction is instantaneous—the device explodes and the generator rumbles, sparks flying. Waves of energy start pulsing out in irregular patterns. It’s so strong that you’re knocked off your feet and your back hits a railing.

You’re knocked out again. Maybe you’re setting a new world record.

Hidden under the knitted quilt, you stir, the thin web of strands barely stifling the bite of the morning cold. Someone is sweetly humming a melody that’s on the tip of your tongue. The constant hum finds its way into you, it softens your bones and eases your heart. The constant hum sings, enveloping you, lulling you back into the solace of the darkness. 

This tranquility is swiftly broken by you remembering. You launch out of bed, blinking your eyes to gain a hold of your surroundings. You’re in a campervan. Nostalgia washes over you as you realize that this is the campervan Danielle’s family used to take on road trips. You wearily eye the photo frame stuck to the rustic fridge. Gleeful smiles and sand-covered faces adorn the frame, reminding you of what you left behind. 

You were known as that quiet kid who had no parents. Any attention you received would consist of pitied stares and hushed whispers. You didn’t mind the loneliness—you were used to it. And your aunt took care of you and showed you love. That was enough. You didn’t think you needed any more love until Danielle moved in next door and changed your life.

She was the first to approach you, holding out a four-leaf clover with a bright smile, saying “Hi! I’m Danielle, you look like you need some good luck!”. It only took you a few months to warm up to her, not that it was hard, because she was so understanding and cheery. She never cared about what other people said at school. She cared about what you had to say, and that’s something you never thought you needed, let alone deserved, until her.

Danielle’s family is equally as sweet, and they welcomed you with open arms. Every few months, they would go on a road trip and you and Danielle would always say farewell with teary eyes and lingering hugs. Until Danielle insisted you tag along, and that’s how it became a tradition.

Lightly caressing miscellaneous decorations as you make your way outside, you take it all in. The gentle twinkle of fairy lights shyly shines through the tinted windows that are littered with stickers and magnets. This caravan was your second home. Inextricably imbued with memories with Danielle, the two of you left no inch of this van unexplored and untouched. Outside, the fresh smell of subdued smoke (bacon and eggs) wafts to you, beckoning you. Your stomach growls. You forget about the ravenous appetite of a superhero.

But you’re not a superhero right now. You’re twelve, not yet bitten, meant to be blissfully unaware of the terrors that await you as you grow up. You run outside to find Danielle. She’s preparing a plate of breakfast for you.

“Danielle!” You rush toward her and tackle her in a hug, tears subconsciously spilling onto your cheeks. She steadies herself so that the plate of food isn’t knocked over.

She gasps out your name, concern etched in her eyebrows. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” you shake your head and nuzzle her neck, sniffling like a baby. “I’m just glad you’re my best friend.”

Your voice is so high and prepubescent, which makes you burst into laughter out of nowhere. Danielle laughs with you. “I’m glad you’re mine, too.”

“Where’s your parents?”

You lean back as she tilts her head to the barbeque grill a few yards away. “Cooking up their breakfast.”

You eventually let go, quite reluctantly, and take a moment to admire her. You’re smitten. Her hair is brown, bangs slightly ruffled, and she’s sporting a toothy grin. You’re so overwhelmed with love you can’t even speak, but this is soon overshadowed by guilt. This is the girl whose heart you broke.

Nothing about you gets past Danielle, so she immediately notices your wavering.

“You okay?” She intertwines your fingers together “Let’s eat breakfast.”

‘I don’t know,” you mumble, feeling a wave of nausea hit you. “I feel a bit dizzy.”

She quickly sets down the plate of bacon and eggs, her hands instantly finding their place on your waist.

“Maybe you should get some more rest,” she pouts, gently squeezing your waist. You try to suppress the shiver that this causes.

“Yeah,” you agree without a sliver of resistance. “Come with me?”

Danielle sends you a knowing smile. “Okay.”

You both make your way back into the van, ditching breakfast. You climb into the comfort of the bed, lifting the same knitted quilt so that it hugs both of you. Your body relaxes, for the first time in a very long time, and you bask in the heat radiating off Danielle.

As your eyes involuntarily close, you can hear the faint sound of ticking. You’re unsure of what is to come, but the curl in your stomach unfolds and pardons you, allowing you to feel Danielle’s love. For just one more time.

–

There’s a brief moment where you regain a shred of consciousness at the nuclear power plant, but everything is too bright and you have to squeeze your eyes shut. You only feel another wave of energy vibrate against your skin before your vision’s black again. Definitely a world record.

Someone’s playing with your hair. Deft fingers weave through strands of your hair and twirl it, lightly pulling on it before letting go and repeating. You blink your eyes open and are met with Danielle already staring at you. She’s older than the last time-travel episode, but younger than the current her. You’re still smitten.

You’re laying in her bed, in her room, in her house. You surmise it’s probably a sleepover night. She’s wearing those glasses with a clear frame, so it must be midway through senior year. You smile to yourself as you remember that she breaks it just before graduation by sitting on it. (She forgot that she put it on her seat.)

“What are you smiling about?” Danielle pokes your nose. “Are you thinking about how that one kid fell off his chair while falling asleep in class?”

“No,” you giggle as you sit up, nostalgia pervading your chest. “But that was funny though. Thanks for reminding me.”

She’s playing with your fingers now, head tilted with that starry look in her eyes that always leaves you dumbfounded. Your smile slowly fades. You feel like a kid again, even though this was only the two of you from three years ago.

“Danielle,” you say shakily, eyes locked onto your entwined fingers. “Would you believe me if I said I’m from the future?”

She considers your question for a second. “What happens in the future?”

You swallow a lump. Where do you even start? ‘Well, I’m actually gonna ghost you in a few months and we’ll never speak again, but then we meet, well not really—it’s more like I see you, and then you die in a cafe because of me. Oh, and I’m Spider-Woman.’

“You dye your hair blonde,” you continue, voice barely above a whisper. You’re holding back tears. “And you go to college overseas to study.”

Danielle’s face shifts into something sadder, half sympathetic. “That doesn’t sound too far-fetched.”

“I’m… I’m sorry,” your voice cracks. “I do some really bad things in the future, and I’m really sorry.”

“It can’t be that bad,” Danielle tries to lift the mood. “Can’t be worse than the time when you spilled orange juice all over my biology assignment the morning it was due.”

Your rambling teeters on the line of coherence. “I push you away—and I’m such an asshole. But I had to, you have to believe me. I can’t tell you why because it hasn’t happened yet and it will probably break some rule of time-traveling, but I just want you to know that I’m so–”

“Hey,” she cradles your face like you're something delicate. Like you’re not the person who will leave her behind with no explanation. “It’s okay.”

“I miss you so much, Danielle.” It’s all you can say. “I miss you so much.”

Her thumb tenderly swipes away any tears that fall. “I’m right here.”

But she’s not.

You’re sobbing pathetically into her hand. You can’t remember the last time you cried. It must’ve been at your aunt’s funeral. Your head is pounding and even though you’re in the body of your younger self, you can still feel the phantom repercussions of fights with Jace. Danielle continues softly, “I could never hate you, no matter what. All you need to do is talk to me—the me in your world.”

“I love you,” you hiccup, lip quivering. “I never got to say it in my timeline. I hope you know that.”

“You know I do too,” Danielle smiles, bitter-sweet. “Promise me you’ll say it to the other me.”

You nod, looping your pinky finger with hers.

She seems satisfied. “You’ve been through a lot. Let’s get some rest.” She guides you back onto the pillow and onto your side, nestling behind you, arms wrapped around your waist and clasped on your stomach.

The ticking sounds again, and it slowly floods your mind as your vision fades to black.

“Please tell me it’s over,” you plead weakly as you wake up to the sight of peeling plaster on the ceiling. You force your body up, and you see an unconscious Jace collapsed against the wall. The broken device is just a fingertip away from you. This is the room you Spubered him into while distancing him from the police. You’re back. 

“Thank you,” you breathe out. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

Tiko hops out of your backpack and rubs his face against yours.

“Hey, buddy,” you coo, scratching his chin. “Thanks for the help. I’ll see you around campus.”

You pick yourself up, shaking stray shards of glass off you. You web Jace against the wall, and make sure to add extra to ensure he doesn’t escape. You briefly notice the wrinkles on his face and his calloused hands.

“Some things we have to let go,” you say softly to him, even though he can’t hear you. “I need to take this to find the missing victims.”

You leave a space in your heart to mourn for Jace’s daughter, and genuinely wish the best for him. Tiko’s already run off somewhere. You take the device and stretch your limbs, preparing for the long journey home. 

Actually, you have two stops before you go home. First stop is a safe place to change out of your suit and temporarily hide the device.

Second stop. You run to find Danielle. You think that this has been a long time coming, considering that you’ve been running away from her for the past three years.

You’re standing like an idiot outside the cafe, hands in your pockets, just staring at Danielle through the glass wall. She seems to feel the weight of your gaze though, because she eventually looks up and her eyes widen at the sight of you. You wave awkwardly, to which she starts packing up her things in a hurry.

You breath hitches as she says your name. It rolls off her tongue in a way that is so familiar.

“Care to join me on a walk?” You rock back and forth on your heels, avoiding eye contact with her.

Her face is passive. It scares you more than it should. But she complies without any questions. “Okay.”

It takes around twenty minutes to reach your aunt’s grave. You pat the space in front of you as a gesture for Danielle to sit down, and she does.

“Before I start,” you say. “I just wanted to say thank you for visiting my aunt. You didn’t have to.”

But she did. Because that’s what she always does—go above and beyond. You take a deep breath before releasing it. “I’m sorry.”

She nods, showing that she’s listening, but doesn’t respond.

“I… was an asshole,” you clench your jaw and close your eyes. “I said some hurtful things.”

(“Are you avoiding me?” Danielle asks, eyebrows furrowed.

It’s another morning of a school day.

“No,” you exhale deeply. You don’t spare her a glance. “I’ve just been really busy.”

“We’ve both been busy for a while,” she counters, frustration laced in her voice. “But the difference is that we still made time for each other.”

You slam your locker door shut. The spider bite thrums with pain. “Take the hint. I don’t have space for you in my life anymore.”)

“And even after I said those things, you still tried to reach out to me.”

(More unread texts from Danielle. Can we talk? I’m sorry about the other day. 

Hey, I’ve been trying to give you space, but I just wanted to check in.

Why are you ignoring me?)

“There’s a reason I ghosted you. Not that I’m trying to justify it, but I just wanted to let you know it wasn’t because of you or anything.”

The other Danielle’s words flash through your mind.

“I love you,” you finally say, and it feels as though there’s this weight lifted off your chest. “I have, for a long time. And I needed to leave you because I love you. Because I was scared.”

Her eyebrows crease in thought. “Because you were scared I didn’t love you back?”

“No—well, not no! Of course I care about that. But that wasn’t my main concern.”

“How do I say this,” you scratch your head. “Oh. You gifted me a beanie the other day. Crocheted by you, red with a white pom pom.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” you say. “Oh.”

You fiddle with the grass that you’re sitting on. “I accepted a long time ago that anyone close to me will be in danger because of, well, who I am. And being Spider-Woman… it’s a responsibility that I have to commit to. I can’t just fall in love.”

A pause. “Who said you can’t?”

“Well,” you stutter. “It’ll put you in danger. And I have to put my Spider responsibilities first.”

She shifts closer to you. “And what if I’m okay with that?”

“You’d… you’d have to actually like me back anyway.”

Danielle punches you on the shoulder.

“Ow!” You frown. “What was that for?”

“For being an asshole.”

“Oh.”

“You should’ve just talked to me.”

“I know,” you admit. “But I just felt like I couldn’t.”

“I never stopped thinking about you all these years,” Danielle shakes her head. “I was a mess. I wanted to hate you so much, but I just couldn’t. And I hated that even more.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I know,” Danielle says, and the look in her eyes tells you that she really does mean it.

You hesitantly reach out toward her. She grabs your hand and moves it to her face. It’s your turn to cradle her, making sure that she’s really here and that this is real. Her smile is teary. 

“I love you,” you breathe out. And that’s the only thing you want to say for the rest of your life. To make up for all the times that you didn’t. 

“I love you, too.” Her smile is so enchanting and you want to lean in and kiss her.

But gunshots ring out nearby and there’s shouting. You turn to Danielle, distraught. She grabs your phone from your pocket and adds herself as a contact.

“Go,” she nods softly, handing you back your phone. “Call me when you’re done. I’ll tend to your wounds.”

Your eyes flit over to your aunt’s grave. You hope you’ve become a hero she can be proud of. And you thank her for everything. You slip on your mask and stuff your clothes in a backpack.

Being a superhero isn’t all that easy, but you’re glad you have people you love to lean on to relieve the burden. You leap off the ground with confidence, swinging toward the chaos.

Dedicated to user phamphamz... happy early birthday!

Title is from Autumn by Niki :]

[yerimbrit]

lovergirl : m. danielle

synopsis: even after she left you, you still came crawling back.

# : pairing ! danielle marsh x gn!reader

# : tags ! angst with a happy?? ending, this is set in like 2026, i'm... sorry(?), part 2 here

# : wordcount ! 3.6k

# : warnings ! none i think just swearing

do you know why you're at the airport?

you're 21. she's probably 21 around this time too, since her birthday was last month. you wonder where she is now, if she's doing well. but knowing her, she's probably thriving, unlike you, stuck behind deadlines and finals.

you see her everywhere. not just on billboards, advertisements, and songs, but also in the little things around your neighborhood. the small candy shop around the corner, where your parents took you and her when you behaved. the local family-owned diner, where you and her stopped by on the weekends. the playground that connected to the park in the heart of the city, where you and her played on the swings after curfew.

instead of elation that hit you when you saw these things, though, it was bittersweet nostalgia. 

...she didn't even say bye before she left.

it's not like you could blame her, though. she knew that you would convince her to stay, to not leave you alone because she was your everything. that you would take her hands in yours and look at her like she puts the stars in the sky, whispering sweet nothings into her ears like the world was going to end after midnight.

she wasn't there for graduation. or at least, you didn't see her there—she was promoting her first comeback album, or so you've heard. you'd muted nearly everything that had to do with her. it was cruel, you know that, because she hasn't even done anything wrong. but it was for the sake of your heart. you never did get to confess to her properly.

sheltering your heart was the least you could do, in the process of recovering from your heartbreak. but if you knew if you saw her again, that shell would be broken instantly.

so no, you don't know why you're at the airport, on the way to seoul to go to some fansign that you heard about just two weeks ago. 

the air of the crowded gate is suffocating, a reminder of how you felt whenever a video of her showed up on your for you page before you blocked the fan account and muted all the tags.

you breathe in, hearing a familiar-sounding laugh behind you, and you whip around only to see two random strangers talking to each other. 

'not good,' you grit your teeth. if you saw her right now you would've broke down. 

cacophonies of conversation between the crowd rang in your ears, and you groan, covering them. you couldn't wait to get on the plane so you could put on the noise-canceling headphones that you'd bought specifically for this 14 hour flight.

thankfully, your wishes were granted, and you were allowed entry onto the plane. it was a cheap economy seat—you were still a student, after all. your parents offered to pay when you told them you were going to korea, but by then you'd already bought the ticket. 

two hours in and it hits you that you're an idiot. a big idiot. you know nothing about the group she's in. buying multiple albums to go to a fansign for a group known worldwide, without even knowing the names of the members? 

you pull up their page on kprofiles and start reading, assimilating yourself with the world of... kpop. yeah. you've never bothered with kpop, even though she was an idol. it's not like you hated it, you just didn't bother getting into it. plenty of your friends were avid listeners, pouring details after details about their favorite groups to you, and that was fine. you didn't mind.

'kim minji,' you read to yourself. 22, the oldest... representative animal is a bear... yeah, you can see it. the next was hanni, the vietnamese-australian member of the group. two aussies? what a coincidence.

you read on, studying each member thoroughly before moving to the next. you make a note to watch videos on youtube about them when you get to the hotel. you read about haerin and hyein, the youngest members, then scroll back up to the member you skipped.

'danielle marsh.' 

you knew what she looked like already because of how popular the group was, but…

'she still looks the same after all these years.'

the same smile, the same eyes. you wonder if anyone else has ever seen the way her eyes twinkle under the moonlight after dark.

'hobbies: drawing, listening to music, swimming... guess she's the same girl after all.'

your seatmate nudges your shoulder, and you almost jump. "hey, are you interested in newjeans?"

he looks at you excitedly. he seemed about the same age, maybe a bit younger than you. figured there'd be at least one of their fans here. why'd you have to get seated next to one of them?

"um," you hum, "something like that."

you don't bother to tell him about your past with one of the members, or the fact that you bought albums for a chance to see them without any knowledge of who they were, because it was none of his business. god knows what would happen if you told him the truth.

he starts blabbering about how he was a fan since debut, and you tune him out, closing your eyes and putting on your headphones. it's not like he noticed, anyway. maybe you can catch up on some sleep you missed while studying.

you dream of her during your impromptu nap, waking up with tears in your eyes. the guy next to you stopped talking too, fortunately. at that rate, you thought he would've continued after the flight. 

you check the time on your phone. surprisingly, a few hours have passed, and the flight is almost over. you must've passed out completely once you shut your eyes. the flight attendant comes by to remind you to unplug your phone from the power outlet, and you patiently wait for your plane to land.

one look outside and you could see fluffy white clouds perfectly set in the air, like a painting or piece of art you could find on social media. you swear you see a rabbit shaped cloud. or maybe you've been staring too hard.

("look, y/n! doesn't that one look like a bunny?

"nah, it's definitely a cat. where are you getting bunny?"

"where are you getting cat? it's most definitely a bunny!"

"okay, okay, fine. you're right, it does look like a bunny, dani."

"see? told ya!")

'fuck,' you shake your head. you try to think about something else. the seat in front of you. the loud sound of the airplane taxiing on the runway. the aircraft marshaller directing said plane.

breathe in. one, two, three, four, five. breathe out. one, two, three, four, five.

you and your seatmate get up to exit the plane, and he flashes a polite smile at you. you offer a tight-lipped one back. the aisleway is cramped, as it always is when you fly economy, and you bump into some people. there's a gross spark of electricity every time you brush shoulders with someone, and you shiver, suddenly reminded of the need to shower when you check in to your room.

the first thing you notice when you step into the airport from the ramp is that there are many products with an idol's face plastered on the front. twice on a candy bag, bts on a bag of chips, le sserafim on a sports drink... the list goes on. it's like they worshipped these people.

...whatever makes them happy.

a crowd comes stampeding towards your direction, causing your survival instincts to kick in. you take refuge in a nearby gift shop to avoid them. the airport was already loud, but the noise increased once the crowd came bursting through.

"minji-ssi, look here!"

"hanni! i love you!"

"please do a heart pose with haerin, danielle!"

"hyein-ssi, over here please!"

your hand twitches. it's not like they were going to see you, but you inconspicuously make your swift escape anyway. there's a bittersweet twist in your stomach at the mention of her name.

instinctively, you whip your head around just in time to make eye contact with her. her mouth is agape and her eyes are widened, and she looks as if she were going to say something, but you turn back around and start power walking to the nearest exit.

does she still remember you? maybe she does, considering the expression she made when you two met eyes. and you can't help but to think, 'does she miss me?'

does she think of you the way you think about her, 24/7, 365 days a year? does she remember the memories you made together, all those years ago? and does she treat them like precious jewels in a well-kept box, or like a constant reminder of what could've been, like you do?

but you also can't help but to think about how beautiful she looked. she's matured, something that you could only sense outside of the pictures provided by the internet. and she holds herself in a poised manner with an air of elegance, but also with a sense of cheeriness and innocence well-placed.

it has been 6 years since you have seen danielle in person.

6 years since you have lost the light of your life.

and you would do anything to change that fact, but, alas, it would never come.

you think you've memorized all the members by now, binging videos of them for three days straight. of course, you went out and explored, since you were in a foreign country, but even when you were out you were still trying to learn everything you could about the group that she's in.

the night before the meeting, you don't sleep well. you wake up on your back, sweating, because you've just had a nightmare. a nightmare where you reunite with her, but she said that she never liked you, and walked away. with every step you took, the distance between you two only increased.

wiping your sweat, you take a few gulps of water from the bottle on the nightstand, taking deep breaths to try and calm your heart. it's around 7 am, looking at the digital clock on the table. the meeting starts at 12, and you have to get there by 11 before it gets too busy for you to even get in.

you walk over to the bathroom with a sense of dread, intending to take a refreshing shower to clear your head.

(it did not help. your mind remains clouded with thoughts of her. impending doom awaits you in four and a half hours.)

not knowing what else to do since you woke up too early, you get dressed and go for a walk. there's a nice, humble café two blocks down the street from your hotel, and you get a warm welcome when you walk through the doors of the establishment. the bells chime in a familiar tune, lifting your spirits ever so slightly.

of all the places you've been to since landing in korea, more than half of them have played at least one newjeans song as background music. and, lucky for you, this one is not. although it is a bit jarring to hear smooth jazz rather than the energetic voices of the girls you've been seeing everywhere.

the café is mostly quiet, aside from the clacking of the dishes and the soft chatter of the few customers also spending their morning here. you mark it as somewhere to visit again, if you ever come back to korea.

with every sip of coffee, there's an added chill to combat the blazing heat that the sun is emitting outside. the sun reminded you of her, who shines just like the sun that breathes us life. the moodmaker between the two of you, who cheered you on even on days where it felt hopeless.

but the iced beverage also filled you with energy, giving you confidence to make it through the big obstacle of the day. (and also the entire reason you even came all this way) you could face her. it's been 6 years. and, well, if it doesn't go well, then at least you'll have an excuse to never come back.

with newfound courage, you exit the café with long strides and return to your hotel room, preparing for the journey ahead. a charger, cash, and a water bottle are all secured in your small crossbody bag.

it's 10:15.

your uber comes in around 10 minutes, and you decide to wait outside in the front to save time.

the drive from the hotel to the venue is about 30 minutes. during that time, you listen to the playlist full of newjeans songs that you made on the day you landed, and take a brief power nap. 'hurt' is the last thing you hear before you drift off to sleep.

you don't feel like you belong here. there's dozens, maybe around a hundred fans talking amongst themselves. from your limited korean, you could tell they were talking about their excitement for the fansign that's about to start in 15 minutes. you really wish you could share the feeling, even though you tried to get into them for three days straight.

a fan approaches you, tapping your shoulder, and you jolt. what is with people and sneaking up on you?

"hey!" oh, they're speaking in english. that makes this easier for you.

"hey," you echo, waving to them. upon closer look, you could see that their tote bag is decked out in merch, from keychains to stickers and a... hanni photocard? you think it's hanni. it's hard to tell when they change their hair colors every comeback.

they notice you staring, and smile at you. then they reach into their bag and pull out a clear goodie-bag containing some stickers and a lomo card.

"would you like one? i ran out of the others, sadly, but i do have hanni and danielle," they say, pulling out another bag which you presume has the other member mentioned.

the iridescent glow of the transparent bag shimmers in your eyes, and you blink. "oh," you start, "i think i'll have hanni."

the goods are handed to you, and you exchange friendly goodbyes. you wistfully look at the card inside the bag, mixed feelings swirling in your gut. it's for the better.

you have a couple more interactions with other fans, some giving you freebies like the first one, and some enthusiastically chatting to you about the group. your initial feelings of discomfort, are, admittedly, still there, but there's an added layer of pleasantness on top now.

weaving through the crowd to get to your assigned seat, you clutch the strap of your new tote bag containing all the things fellow(?) fans have given you.

the tote was another one of the things given, and you think the design is pretty neat, with a nicely placed logo and slogan in a chic style. you might actually use it after today, too.

the announcer calls for the fansign to commence, and five girls file in from a side entrance, their managers and bodyguards following alongside. immediately, the venue erupts in cheers from the audience, shouting affectionate phrases to the members, similar to what happened at the airport.

influenced by the majority, you cheer as well, although it was cut short when you realized that internally you were so out of place.

the group begins with some simple conversation starters, such as 'how are you' and 'have you eaten?' with as much energy as when they came in. you don't exactly know what's happening, so you sit and wait patiently for the event to start. everything seems so daunting.

finally, after around 5 minutes of greetings, the actual signing is starting. you're seated in the middle, which works out in your favor; not one of the first ones to come up and have to face her, but also not one of the last ones and lose your courage. you watched the interactions, the delusion-inducing actions that each of the girls provided, and the poses that they did together. the people around you were either taking videos, pictures, or excitedly talking to their friends beside them.

as the amount of rows in front of you remaining to go up and talk to the girls dwindles down, your heart sped up, thudding against your chest. an even bigger sense of dread instills in you, legs unmoving when the row directly in front of you comes back to sit down. you get nudged by the person next to you to move, and you shakily bring yourself to apologize and get a move on.

what would her reaction be? would she be shocked? happy? maybe mad, because if she actually wanted for you to be involved in her life all this time she would've said goodbye to you, or kept in touch. maybe you should just leave. you got yourself in this whole predicament, anyway. no one even told you to do it.

your palms are sweaty as you make your way down the velvet stairs, and you wipe your hands on your pants in nervousness and fear. eventually, the line slows down once your row reaches the table that the girls are sitting at, and you take it as a chance to try to relax.

breathe in.

five things you can see. seats, the person in front of you, the ground you are standing on, the album that you're holding to get signed (in your extensive research, people usually brought theirs to be signed on), and the table that seems so close yet so far from you. okay.

breathe out.

four things you can touch. the album, your shirt and jacket, and the bracelet on your wrist.

in...

three things you can hear. the increasingly obnoxious whirring sound of the air conditioning, the buzz of the audience, and...

fuck.

"hey, how are you?" a somewhat familiar voice asks. you say somewhat because you've only heard her voice in videos. you find yourself now kneeling in front of minji, the oldest member of the group. she's a lot prettier up close, all of them are, but it's a bit jarring to suddenly see her with your own eyes.

you clear your throat, blinking rapidly to try to focus yourself on the girl. "i'm, i'm gooth-"

...you bit your tongue. you try to laugh it off, awkward giggles slipping from your lips, and thankfully she joins you in laughing.

"that's good," she smiles, and it puts you at ease. no wonder people idolize these girls. she signs the front of the album, asks about your life, and you tell her about your school and how you're a newer fan. she waves at you with another gummy smile once your two minutes are up.

the next is haerin, who is the more reserved and quiet member of the group. there's a pair of cat ears sitting on her head, probably a gift from one of the previous fans, and she blinks at you owlishly, almost like she knew you, before a small smile settles on her face.

it is slightly unsettling, but the more you converse with her the more that feeling dissolves. she really is reserved, and the two of you exchange witty remarks with knowing grins. she signs your album just before the two minute mark.

hyein is super friendly, very high energy. you feel like she'd be a great person to be around on any given day. your conversation with her is mostly centered around food, and how she wants to visit australia again once you mentioned where you're from. she signs the album in the middle of your discussion about the best korean foods to try during your stay.

your time with hyein ends with a staring contest. (she won) and you give her a handshake after, joking about how you would win the next time. you think the sparkles in her eyes are very endearing.

hanni signs your album as soon as you set it down on the table. she's a very likable person in general; you think you could've been friends with her if she went to the same school as you. you also share the same music taste, spending your time together talking about the latest sza album and comparing hand sizes (yours were bigger, unsurprisingly)

but nothing could prepare you for the girl at the end of the table. her laugh rings in your ear from diagonally across from you, and you get a splitting headache. you mask it well enough for hanni not to notice, though, and you're able to finish the interaction smoothly.

how could anyone ever hate danielle? definitely not you. as much as you had reasons to hate her, you just couldn't bring yourself to do so much as dislike or be angry towards her. instead, you just drowned yourself in your sorrow and confusion.

she's perfect. the exact opposite of you, and yet she stayed with you until she didn't. those memories that you have together, they're so engraved in your mind, and you don't even know if she feels the same.

you slide over to the next slot, keeping your head down as you placed your album back onto the table.

heartbeat thudding in your chest. cold sweat running down your cheek. teeth biting your lip. is this the end for you? because it sure does feel like it.

when you finally do look up, and make eye contact with danielle, it feels like time has slowed even though it's really only been five seconds. her expression is mirroring yours: widened eyes, lips slightly parted. you gulp.

tears well in the corner of her eyes, and fuck everything, because you made her cry.

she blinks them away, and clears her throat, taking a second to regain her composure, and timidly calls out to you.

"y/n?"

a/n : 🤗 not the best at writing angst i hope this is ok !

[silantryoo]

TEXTS ; idol!MO DANIELLE as your girlfriend

WARNINGS ; none

> main masterlist.

[fimmiest]

light - danielle x fem!reader

"you always had me, you're always shining"

non!idol au, established relationship, purely fuffly!! not sure abt the pacing but just needed to get this one out of my system... enjoy :)

"beach! beach! beach!!" two excited voices cheered in the backseat, the windows rolled down and you remember seeing the shoreline getting closer and salty breeze pickling on your skin. every summer break you would go with danielle's family at the beach, it was your favorite thing.

a spot where you and dani had spent countless afternoons digging in the sand, collecting shells, and daring each other to jump into the waves, how her eyes would always be full of wonder and excitement, full of life. it was just how she was, always shining.

"look yn!!" little danielle exclaimed holding a shell out like a treasure meant only for you.

you glanced at her and there was a glow about her, like dani belongs here, in this moment, with the ocean and the open sky. her sunburned skin from being out in the sun all day, and pretty sure yours were too.

"it is beautiful" you take the shell and hold it close to your heart, gaze not on the ocean trinket but on her.

you remember falling asleep at dani's shoulder at the ride back that day.

—

if you could choose, sunday night would probably be your least favorite time of a day. just the thought about the next day being a monday and all the stressfully school week coming back again it was enough to loom your head... well it would be. but since danielle noticed you got what you named 'monday blues' she made it her mission to spend every, not skipping a single one, sunday night with you.. not that you ever tried to stop her

just like right now, it didn't even needed much to be enjoyable. you two were just laying on your bed after dinner, danielle was watching another disney movie since she said she would marathon them all over again, you payed attention on the first one laughing along with her but at the second your focus had drifted. you were teetering on the edge of boredom and sleepiness, lulled by the warmth and comfort of having danielle close.

your fingers absentmindedly played with her hair, since she was lying on your chest, her head nestled against you as you traced random patterns on her hairline and face.

she turns her attention to you, her heads tilts in a silent question that you didn't understand, you tilt your head back at her, confusion written on your face.

"you've been going around at this side of my face for a while" danielle smiles pointing at your fingers resting at the right side of her face and you freeze for a second by the observation

"oh, sorry does it bother?" you began to pull your hand away, embarrassed that you hadn’t noticed.

"no no" she replied quickly, grabbing your hand and holding it in place. "is just funny.. cause you always do this when we are laying down"

"i..." thump "i like your little moles, you know? they are like little stars.. a tiny constellation"

"yeah?" her smile was teasing but the longing on her eyes told you the otherwise, it made your chest tighten.

"uhm.." without thinking too much, you leaned down, pressing a soft peck to the moles near her cheekbone. there was one near her eye, mostly hidden, but for you it was the most adorable one, you lingered there for a couple of seconds longer, hearing dani let out a tiny involuntary squeal soon after.

—

"you know what I want?" you heard dani saying, her hand tugging on your shirt to draw your attention to her, as if it wasn't ever

"yes?"

"go to the beach"

you nod absentmindedly, missing the beach days you two used to go when kids "yeah, well the test season is ending next week. i think we can go-"

"no. i mean, right now"

"what??" you turn to look at her, eyes wide "dani we can't-"

"look" she starts "it's only.. six and it's like uhmm a hour and half to get there, right? and then we stay for a solid two hours, if all goes right we return home before midnight!" she finished with a big smile, you are not even surprised by the sudden burst of organization.

you shake your head already knowing this would undeniable, until your remember a detail "and how are we going there, my sun?"

"yn" she looks at you like the answer is already obviously "my star, darling, aren't you a licensed driver now?"

you open and close your mouth, thrown off by the fact that she trust in you driving "i mean.. yeah, but-"

"then let's go!!" dani jumps up and grabbed a bag that, conveniently, was sitting next to your desk.

the sudden footsteps coming from the stairs makes your mom, who was at the living room look up surprise at you girls "where are you two going?"

"to the beach!!" danielle exclaim excited, you tried to answer her question but dani was already dragging you by the hand out of the door.

—

"hey, sunshine?"

"hm?" dani turns to look at you, normally bathed by the sun it was different looking at her in the moonlight glow. if it was even possible, she looked more beautiful under the stars.

you smiled softly, reaching up to tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

"nothing" the words you didn’t say hung in the air, you were sure it didn't needed to be said, for the moment you look at the ocean back again

dani chuckles loveably and rest her head on your shoulder "i love you" her holds your hand, fingers intertwining as if it were the most natural thing in the world, you gently squeeze her hand in return.

"i love you, too"

[modanisgf]

_WORLD , DANIELLE MARSH

☆ summary— you and dani are best friends, you do everything together and tell each other everything. lately though, danielle has been extremely secretive and acting weird so you investigate. you definitely didn’t expect to find out she had a secret identity, or her to be the hero after your heart..

☆ pairing— spiderman!danielle marsh x fem!reader

☆ genre— wlw, fluff, spiderman au, kind of like the concept of miraculous, rewrite of my ‘overdrive’ smau, secret mutual pining, friends to lovers

☆ warning(s)— profanity, mentions of character death, blood, character endangerment

☆ schedule— updates every wednesday

☆ note— everyone thank seventeen for this 🙏 im omw to becoming a carat (based on world_ by seventeen) also thank jay for telling me to make this a smau ❤️

profiles: spiderjeans, yunjin’s bodega

001 — magnetic

002 — 3005

003 — all the stars

004 — hypnotize

005 — i wish

006 — passionfruit

007 — dahood connoisseur..

008 — it was a good day

009 — honest

010 — don’t wanna fall in love

dividers by @rookthornesartistry !

TAGS 🏷️ (OPEN): @jayjj7 @haerinsloverr @mxl633 @hrjunluvs @kissablening @mah4u @idkwhatim-doinghere101 @xen248 @dexthzone @kaypanaq @multiliker @addorations @edenzeepy @sixflame438 @saysirhc

[the-roo-too]

KIM MINJI

#.lunatic

#.candy

PHAM HANNI

#.candy

MO JIHYE

#.do.what.we.like

#.candy

#.free.fall

KANG HAERIN

#.candy

#.wildside

#.messy

LEE HYEIN

NEWJEANS

#.the.story.of.tonight

#.feel.special

[kkuroshie]

I'm here

Words: 488

Pairing: idol!danielle x idol!reader

Today Is minji unnie birthday.. yes I'm late because I forgot to buy a gift yesterday.

*phone rings* [hanni is calling]

"Hey unnie" you said while walking back to the car, "Where are you!? The live is starting!" hanni said, "OHHH YEAHHH I'M ALMOST THEREEEE, LOVE U UNNIE" you cut the call before hanni scold you.

[5min. Later]

You arrive at your dorm, as you enter you can hear the gurls shouting, you walk at the door and knock then all of them became silent until "it's me Y/n" hanni open the door and drag you in.

"Y/N-NIE IS HEREE" Minji said as they all clap, "woah, unnie is that your gift?!:" hyein said pointing at your bag, " yeah well i think unnie deserved it" you said while Minji got up to hug you.

It's been 20 min. and you notice danielle is so quiet, You look at her worried it felt like something is wrong but she keeps smilling.

You keep checking her if shes fine until the live ended.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY AGAINN" Hyein said while dragging all the members to a group hug. After the birthday celebration, everyone went to their own rooms and you just slide at the edge of your bed, thinking why danimo is quiet during the live.

You trying to sleep but the worries bother you, so you got up and knock on danielle's door.

*knock, knock, knock*

"Hey dani it's me Y/n" you said as you lean on the door. You hear the door click revealing sad looking face of danielle, you drag your self in and lock the door behind you.

You stare at dani and you can feel shes about to cry, You push her head to your chest and hug her.

"Shhh.. hey It's ok let it out" you said as you pats her back, " I'm tired " she said while sobbing. You notice ur shirt is wet from her tears, you wait her to calm down and guide her to seat at her bed.

" you seem quiet during the live.. you ok?" You said as you keep rubbing her hand

"Yeah.. I'm fine is just that my heart felt lil heavy awhile ago" she said while staring at you, "you know we can't avoid problems but we can solve them.. together, minji unnie is here, hanni unnie, hearin, hyein and ofc me I'm always here for you since day 1" you said looking at her shining eyes, She suddenly hug you so tight and mummbles " I love you y/nnie, so much your the reason why I still have motivation and our fans our bunnies" you chuckle at her cute lil message, "I love u too" you pull away the hug and lift her chin to kiss her.

After all those chitchat, you can see danielle is sleeping so peacefully Its because of your help without you danielle maybe sad or down until now.

----------------------------------------------------------------

A: Sorry ive been busy cuz im graduating this month I hope you guys enjoy this lil story 💖

[earlysunshines]

you always had me (and you’re always shining)

danielle marsh x fem!reader ; fluff, pining, slowburn

synopsis: danielle has been there for your ups and downs, knowing her for so long and debuting with her makes you fall deeper and deeper—whether you like it or not.

warnings: sixth member reader ; readers a few months younger than dani ; pining and yeah i… love pining ; sloooow burn ; TOOTHrotting fluff like all your teeth will fall out prob and also angst (if u squint hard) ; they’re in love i fear, like sooo in love ; minji literally watches the whole thing unfold and doesn't say anything ; reader's native language is english ; some other implied things that will make sense it's just story buidling/backstory LOL ; barely proofread

a/n: this is a loooong one i hope u all enjoy :-] i enjoyed writing every bit and I was smiling the whole way, I hope you all smile reading this too.

being an idol is anything but easy, and that’s very palpable as you lie on the ground, sweaty and exhausted, in the practice room.

minji had watched the whole thing; right after the last session of the ditto choreo, you had walked over to the corner of the room, sat down, and ended up flat on your back. seeing you like this made her laugh.

regardless, you loved your job. music was your passion, and dancing brought joy to your heart. the journey to becoming an idol prepared you for the intense performances and demanding physical routines, but it didn't prepare you for how your heart would race each time a certain member interacted with you—just like she’s doing now.

danielle waits until you take your forearm off your forehead, watching you blink twice when she’s in your field of vision.

she greets you warmly. “hi stranger.”

“dani.” just the sight of her makes you smile. “hey.”

“you okay? minji wanted me to check on you.”

“tired, that’s all.”

“you should drink water then, sweetheart.” 

you hated when she called you these stupid pet names—not because it made you uncomfortable or anything, but because it made your heart nearly jump out of your chest. 

“want me to get you some?” she asks, her voice gentle yet playful.

“i can do it myself, thanks.” you respond, getting up without looking back at her—danielle frowns.

she watches you walk over to get water for yourself, slightly hunched over with your hand propping you up at the counter. she sees you stare down at the table between sips, seemingly lost in your own world, and it’s a tad bit concerning. sure, you’re quiet, but never this quiet or distant. you even practiced during the breaks, not giving yourself one and pretty much defeating the whole purpose of a break. everyone had noticed, but danielle had been much more worried.

danielle goes over to minji, who’s stretching and humming as the younger one is in her peripheral. she sits down next to the oldest member and continues to look at you, now you’re leaning against the wall sipping on the cup, and then letting it hang loose in your hand as you stare into the distance.

“minji, is y/n alright? she’s been so out of it today and the last time we had practice.”

minji looks in your direction and shakes her head. “no idea, i noticed it too. i thought you would’ve known.”

“i don’t. i’m just worried.”

“you want me to talk to her?” minji suggests, “but you’re closer with her, aren’t you?”

the younger member continues to look your way, watching haerin tap your shoulder and making you jump a bit from being startled. haerin turns to face you, her lips moving with some quiet words danielle can’t quite catch. you wave her off with a reassuring smile and a thumbs up, then head to a corner to stretch, finding your own space.

“yeah, she’s just been distant these past few days. minji, i don’t know what to do.”

“pry her open, she’s got a tough exterior you know.”

“she’s always been like that.” danielle sighs, continuing to stretch.

it’s well known that you’re quite reserved, but that doesn’t mean you aren’t bold, outgoing, or unwilling to talk to your members. all of them see you as a pillar and light in the group, a source of strength and joy. even further, there’s compilations of you online making the members laugh and being an idiot, you’re a joy to your fans and the people close to you. but there are times when you close yourself off and become unusually quiet. it’s not like haerin’s nature, being quiet and all; instead, it’s a concerning silence that signals something is off. danielle, in particular, has a keen sense for these moments, always noticing when you retreat into yourself and sensing that something is bothering you.

she’s always been able to find a way to help you out and talk to her a bit, you’ve had a soft spot for her and it’s evident to everyone in your group. you rarely speak on your problems; the fact that danielle can get you to utter a sentence regarding what bothers you is astonishing itself.

you’ve known danielle for as long as you’ve been a trainee since she’s been there longer. she’s always been incredibly kind and patient with you, especially during those initial days when you were adjusting to being away from your grandparents who raised you. being in a place so completely different from what you were used to was challenging, but danielle’s presence was a comforting constant. 

the bond that you two had only grew with time and experience, and the fact that you two had so many similarities (one being the year you were born) only strengthened it. danielle, without a doubt, was the one person who could ground you. because of this, she’s going to make it her priority to find out what’s up with you.

when practice ends and everyone is free to go back to the dorms, danielle approaches you and grabs your hand, making you turn to face her with a raised brow.

“yes?”

“let’s grab lunch y/n, the rest of us are going to.”

“oh, i’m not really feeling it, sorry.” you apologize, feeling bad when the member holding your hand frowns. “i think i’ll just eat later, i’m not hungry. could you buy me something though?”

she lets out a small huff. “what’s going on?” 

you tilt your head like haerin always does and hum in confusion. “what do you mean?”

“something is bothering you.”

“no, i’m just tired. can’t you see the eyebags? seriously, i’m so sleepy…” you try to mask what you feel with a lighthearted chuckle, but danielle can hear the lie in your words. she wants to be angry at you for lying, but she knows you can’t help it. lying about what you feel is like breathing to you. “grab me a rice bowl?”

she lets go of your hand and it almost urges you to spill pent-up emotions, but you won’t give in that easily. sure, her pretty face and caring self make you fold most of the time, but not in this case.

“alright y/n.” danielle sighs. “can we talk tonight? if you’re feeling like you want to. i hate seeing you so out of it.”

you pause, looking at her with slumped shoulders before biting your lip. 

“thank you, light.”

–

danielle has many nicknames and things people like to call her. one of her favorites—if not her absolute favorite—has always been dani, at least until you let a special nickname slip off your lips not too long ago, one that made her cheeks warm and brought a shy smile to her face.

“light?” she asks, looking at you like you’re stupid – in an admirable, adorable way of course.

you shrug. “sunshine is used too much by bunnies and the other members, light is much more unique and special to me. you’re special to me so i wanted something special. you don’t like it?”

danielle loves it the moment she hears you say it.

it's late, and while the rest of the members are fast asleep, you and danielle find yourselves unable to drift off. instinctively, you both end up in your room, lying on the bed. danielle’s head rests comfortably on your stomach as you explain the spontaneous, out-of-nowhere nickname you came up with for her a few months after your debut. she can't tell if the room is too hot and you need to start using your fan (you really do, danielle doesn’t understand how you survive without turning on that fan in these hot dorms), or if it's just because you've just called her something that makes her feel truly special.

her heart flutters. “i like it a lot. how’d you think of it?”

you start humming to yourself as you think. “i mean, you’re like sunshine, the sun. you know, you’re very bright and lights are bright too so…”

“that’s cute.” you’re cute, danielle might explode right there and right now, ‘cute’ is not capturing how much she adores it. “you’re creative.”

“i’m not.”

“you look down on yourself too much.” danielle retorts as she gets up to lay down next to you. her face is turned to gaze at your features. “seriously.”

“or maybe you just look up to me too much.”

“well you need to shrink. anyway, i think my statement is factual and yours is false.”

“you really want to debate right now?”

“i don’t need to, i’m right.” danielle smirks at you and you roll your eyes.

you turn on your side and she mirrors you, the mood of the room shifts, the air seems warmer – maybe you should turn that fan on.

danielle lets out a small yawn, her blinking slowing down as her eyelids grow heavy. you giggle quietly, then pull the blanket over the two of you, taking a moment to admire her. she looks peaceful and beautiful, more so than anyone or anything you've ever seen.

you reach over to fix the blanket sitting on her figure. “i take it you’re staying here tonight?”

she nods sleepily.

“okay.”

–

danielle knocks on your door, and before you can answer she lets herself in. she’s always done this, it’s amusing.

(and really, she knows you’ll let her in anyway. you’ve never once declined.)

she spots you lying in bed, your face hidden under the plaid blanket your grandma had shipped from your home. danielle knows it’s one of your most prized possessions, she can tell that it’s especially important as you cling onto it.

“the rice bowl is in the fridge, you should eat.”

“i’ll eat later dani.”

she frowns at you, watching you lay there and face the window in your room.

your favorite playlist fills the silence in the room, the one hanni contributed half of when you two were feeling emotional in the middle of the night and sharing sappy songs that made your hearts melt. it’s a bit concerning that this playlist is also what you listen to when you’re sulking, given that it’s filled with half of daniel caesar’s discography and slow love songs (happy and sad, but you still manage to sulk when it’s something to swoon over). 

you and hanni have such similar tastes in music; it’s almost dangerous how in sync you are when it comes to the songs that tug at your heartstrings.

danielle shuts the door slowly before making her way over to you. she sits beside you, rubbing your shoulder through the material of your blanket.

“hey sleepy, you’ll feel terrible if you don’t eat.” she squeezes you lightly, making you groan quietly. “the others are worried too, i told them you took a nap.”

“tell them i’m sleeping in.” you mumble, covering yourself in the blanket more. “thanks dani.”

she sighs and moves over so her lips hover above your ear. “y/n, you can’t stay like this. we’ve talked about this before, it’s not good to keep things in; you’ll explode.”

“it’s nothing, please danielle.”

“sweetheart,” her voice makes you all tingly. “please?”

you finally give in after she slides her hand down to your back, rubbing it comfortingly. with a deep breath, you slowly sit up and lean against the wall behind you. danielle’s eyes are filled with a tender, eager sparkle, her bottom lip jutting out slightly as she watches you, ready to listen to every word. 

the room feels warmer, the closeness between you making the moment intimate and heartfelt.

“the comeback is a little stressful, but i’ve managed of course.” she nods as you explain, giving you her undivided attention. “and my grandma recently got surgery, i found out two days ago and i’ve just been worried sick. the thought of her without me there to help her out makes me sick. i know my grandpa is there to help her out but– i’ve just always been there for them. now i can’t, and i can’t disappoint them either.”

you've never been much of a crier; the members have seen you cry maybe two or three times. but when danielle’s features soften and she immediately reaches over to engulf you in a hug that you could drown in, tears start to well in your eyes. you manage to hold them back, but the overwhelming comfort and warmth she offers makes it difficult.

“and you know the whole thing with my family after i took the trainee route, my grandparents are the only ones who are really fond of me and i– i’m just really… thrown off right now.

“i’m sorry to hear that, really.” she mumbles near your neck, mostly into your hair.  her embrace feels like a safe haven, a place where you can let go of your worries, even if just for a moment. you start to think that everything will be fine. “you’re not letting down anyone, just you existing makes your grandparents proud. i know it. and, i know i’ve only met your grandma briefly, but she’s such a strong woman from what i’ve seen, seriously. i trust that she’ll be fine, but would she be fine if she knew you were stressing?”

you shake your head – danielle has a point.

“i- i guess not.”

“well, i think her recovery would go much better knowing the woman she loves most is doing her best and doing alright.”

danielle’s right, she’s so right it really does ground you. you wrap your arms around her and hug back tightly, letting your worries flow away.

“thank you.”

“mhm.” she hums softly, then pulls away to gaze at you, placing her hands on your shoulders. “you should eat, let’s eat together.”

“you haven’t eaten yet?”

“a little, but i couldn’t eat a lot knowing you hadn’t.”

maybe you should’ve eaten, you should’ve because danielle isn’t satisfied. her stomach is most likely nowhere near half full. you quickly get up and grab her hand, dragging her out your room after hearing the new information.

“i can’t have you hungry dani.”

-

minji is happy to see your spark back, seeing you so enthusiastic and performing so well during practices makes her happy. 

this time, your practice is being recorded. you're all jumpy and giddy as you play around with hyein, teasing her in between breaks, but you manage to stay focused and excel as you run through the choreography. the camera captures you tease hanni, you make fun of the three-inch height difference between you two while she pouts and chases you around. even haerin joins in, watching you run around while you grin at the shortest member. the practice room buzzes with laughter and energy, your lighthearted teasing making the grueling session more enjoyable for everyone.

danielle and minji watch from afar, well, it’s mostly danielle who’s watching – admiring.

minji sees something special in her gaze, a sort of longing. a smile makes its way to danielle's lips, and minji watches the way danielle softens. the camera captures the same sight minji is seeing, though in much lower quality. the tender moment is evident even through the grainy footage, highlighting something much more complex between danielle and the object of her affection: you.

minji judges the younger member. “seems like you got her back on her feet.”

“hm?” danielle says, flinching slightly after being startled. “oh, yeah. she’s definitely feeling better, i’m really glad.”

“you two have something special, hm?”

“what do you mean?” 

minji looks back at you. you’ve given up, and hanni is now dragging you to the ground, both of you laughing as hyein records the whole thing. minji then glances at danielle. the younger australian member finds herself giggling unknowingly as she watches the whole scene unfold, her eyes twinkling with amusement and something softer, something that betrays the ‘platonic’ aspect in the fondness she holds for you.

minji shakes her head. “nothing. let’s get back to work.”

-

“hi everyone, i’m with y/n!” minji greets the livestream, looking at herself in the screen and fixing her hair. “say hi.”

you sit down next to her and fix the cap on your head, waving at the phone and smiling. “hi everyone, it’s been a while since i’ve made an appearance, huh?”

minji looks at you and scoffs. “you were on danielle’s live last week, and on her little voice message for a moment.”

you giggle and shake your head, putting up your hands to make a little ‘x’ sign with your fingers. 

“sounds like someone’s a fan of miss marsh, stalking her phoning activity…”

“bro, you are literally apart of her content a third of the time.”

“are you jealous kim minji?”

“of what, danielle being all over you? count me out…”

you giggle and continue on with the live. the two of you talk about the upcoming ‘making jeans,’ reminiscing and laughing over the countless memories you shared during the process of filming the music video.

of course, you tend to mention danielle often, complimenting her looks in each outfit and scene you all shot, the memories of mainly the two of you during the whole filming process. minji listens carefully as you ramble, narrowing her eyes each time the name ‘danielle’ is brought up. she lets you ramble, of course; she'd be something not too short of awful if she were to cut you off from gushing about your fellow member. 

there’s a sparkle in your eyes like fireworks going off as minji watches you. your smile is wide and genuine, your hands animatedly emphasizing every detail of whatever topic you're discussing, and without fail, danielle is woven into the narrative. the slight tint of pink on your cheeks doesn’t escape minji’s notice; it hints at something deeper than simple admiration.

the conversation shifts away from danielle and onto your other members, particularly how you and minji managed to cook a five-course meal for the rest of the group. questions flow and are answered promptly, and as the live stream reaches its fifty-minute mark, minji decides it's time to wrap up. 

once she ends the stream, you turn to her and give a thumbs up. “that was fun, lets do more of these.”

“you talked about danielle for a fifth of the live, y/n.”

“sorry…” you mumble, “i just remembered a lot of things from the shoot.”

you remembered danielle from the shoot that’s for sure. 

minji waves her hand and says, “it’s not a bad thing that you did…”

“of course not, danielle is lovely.”

to you? more than just lovely i bet. minji thinks, rolling her eyes before she flicks the cap off your head. you make some strange noise and it makes the older member chuckle.

“let’s get some rest, thanks for joining me.”

“yeah, anytime.” you wink at her before getting up and waving, walking out the door with a grin on your lips.

minji finds herself leaning against her bedframe, reflecting on everything she’s observed over the past two weeks—and honestly, over the years. 

the whole livestream with you has her pondering now; even as trainees, you and minji had always been close and supportive of each other. however, minji had always noticed something distinct in the dynamics between you and danielle. while all four of you—minji, hanni, danielle, and yourself—spoke english, there was an undeniable uniqueness in the connection, the exchanged glances, the subtle cues, and the way you and danielle interacted.

she collapses onto her bed and grabs her phone, concentrating hard as she clicks on the 'youtube' icon and goes to the search bar. biting the inside of her lip, she types 'newjeans danielle and y/n,' feeling a little awkward, as if she’s doing something a fan would do. she shakes her head to dispel the feeling, focusing on the recommended searches that follow:

"newjeans danielle and y/n moments" "danielle and y/n cute interactions" "newjeans y/n looking at danielle" "danielle and y/n chemistry compilation"

minji clicks on the first result, curiosity piqued, then clicks on the first video that pops up. the video is a compilation of moments between you and danielle, set to a soft, romantic song. as the montage begins, she sees clip after clip of the two of you laughing together, eyes sparkling with unspoken understanding. secret glances are exchanged, your smiles growing wider with every shared look. inside jokes flow effortlessly, creating a tempo only the two of you seem to follow. 

minji watches as the moments play out, each one reinforcing the undeniable bond between you and danielle. most of these clips could be played out as touchy, close friend moments, but some cannot be brushed off as that at all.

there’s a clip that plays, and minji cringes a little when she sees herself pop up on screen, talking about how she feels before a stage. the focus then shifts, zooming in on the background where danielle is leaning against your shoulder, eyes closed. minji watches as you turn to look at danielle lovingly, a soft smile playing on your lips before you look back at the makeup artist fixing your blush. 

another clip that makes minji's brows furrow also sparks a memory in her head. in the clip, you jump at minji, placing both hands on her shoulders as you lift yourself up from the ground. when you land back down, you hug the older member and laugh with her, happy that you've managed to scare her. what minji never noticed before now plays in the video: danielle is in the distance, the footage edited to zoom in on her. she's watching the whole scene, and as soon as your arms wrap around minji, danielle's gaze turns slightly more serious. danielle bites half of her lip and clenches her jaw, clearly a little bothered by it.

that’s not like her at all.

minji skips the video and finds the most replayed moment, her eyes widening at how oblivious she had been to you two. have the other members noticed as well? the question rings throughout minji’s head, the others have to have had a small hunch. then again, danielle is affectionate, and you are too at times, so maybe it wouldn’t be unbelievable for them to be blind to whatever you and her have going on. 

you and danielle are shooting for the photobooks, taking your duo pictures. minji watches as danielle takes this opportunity to be touchy as ever, her hands never leaving you as you both pose. her hand ends up on your forearm, shoulders, and even the back of your neck. she's flirting with you the whole time too, mostly to earn genuine smiles and laughs for the camera, but also because she enjoys it and means it – minji assumes. even as you two pose with hanni added, danielle still keeps her hand on you at all times, not wanting to leave you be. and when the camera pans to her hand sliding to your waist and rubbing it just barely, minji freezes.

each moment feels charged with a depth she hadn't fully grasped before. even she hasn’t noticed half of what was clipped.

the comments are filled with fans gushing over your interactions:

"i swear they have the best chemistry!" "look at how danielle looks at y/n! my heart can't take it." "they are so cute together! #dany/n" “are they dating? i’m new to this group. ↪️”not officially, but from their interactions it seems like it could be true.” ↪️”there has to be something though, most likely they are.” ↪️”hey, let’s not assume things. we don’t know what goes on behind cameras and they’re probably just really close friends!”

minji sighs, a mix of amusement and concern flooding her. she knew you two were close, but this compilation and the fan reactions make it clear just how much your bond stands out. sure, danielle and haerin had some of their own moments (mainly because haerin, but this? this is something.

 she scrolls through a few more videos, each one reinforcing what she's just realized. 

"oh my fucking god," minji murmurs, the weight of understanding settling in as she processes everything: you think danielle shines brighter than the sun.

you talk about her like she is your sun, and danielle looks at you like you’re her moon.

and minji? she's caught in the midst of your oblivious pining, realizing she occupies the role of the stars, planets, and everything in between.

-

“hanni.”

the younger member jumps at the sound of minji barging into her room at 12 in the morning, looking at her like she’s crazy.

“the hell man? at least knock–”

“you and danielle, you’re both very similar, very close too, i know that.”

“of course i’m close with dani, what the hell are you–”

“you’re close with y/n too, yeah?”

“i’m close with everyone including you minji, what kind of interrogation is this?”

minji flops onto hanni’s bed and stares up into the ceiling like she’s just worked a 9-5 with no break in between. the younger member walks over to close the door of her room, then sits back down to assess whatever is happening. 

“seriously,” hanni begins, “what’s up?”

“are dani and y/n dating? like are they together? like girlfriends, like– romantic?”

hanni giggles, making minji turn her head to give hanni a good look of the confused expression she has on. “what? no…? they’re just really flirty minji, i thought we knew this.”

“okay well i just went live with y/n and she was rambling and gushing about dani for a solid fifteen minutes. hanni, that live was almost an hour.”

“oh.” hanni simply responds, going silent.

“have you noticed something between them? or am i going crazy…”

the room is silent for a while, and minji lets it stay that way, giving hanni time to process her thoughts. hanni starts to really think about her other two members. minji has a point: you and danielle are close, and your demeanor changes noticeably when danielle is involved. she also recalls the time when she and danielle had gone out together, only for danielle to talk about you a good chunk of the time. it doesn’t help that danielle’s lock screen consists of two rotating pictures: one being a group photo and the other being you holding a kitten.

danielle and hanni spend a lot of time together, and now that hanni fully analyzes all those moments, she realizes that a significant portion of their conversations revolves around you. it’s almost as if you were there with them. danielle also looks at you differently, more lovingly, compared to the way she looks at the other members. when she flirts, it’s also different – more genuine, more meaningful. hanni had always been too distracted by how flirty and stupid danielle was to notice the blush on both your faces during those flirtatious moments. now, everything starts to make sense.

“okay wait yeah,” hanni bites the side of her finger. “i guess? but danielles really loving and sweet.”

“but much more with y/n, right?” minji sounds like she’s trying to convince herself too. “oh my god this is so embarrassing but i went on youtube…”

“don’t tell me you–”

minji puts a hand in the air, closing her eyes embarrassingly. “it was for research.”

“research on your friends?”

“stop! you need to see the video too, i didn’t even notice this shit.” 

hanni sighs, letting minji scoot next to her and play a video titled ‘danielle and y/n moments that could make the cut in a romance drama.’ the younger member eyes minji after reading the title, minji just puts a finger to her lips and presses play.

“i can’t believe you’re making me watch this, am i a bunny or what?”

“just watch.”

minji is older and hanni does not have anything better to do at this hour of the night, so she keeps her eyes glued on the screen.

the younger woman goes through every single emotion that minji has with each second passing by. her brows crease, her hand hovers over her mouth in shock, and she almost squeals during some clips – minji nudges her teasingly. when the video ends hanni sits there staring at the phone dead silent. 

“well?”

“that was edited very well.”

the older member pushes the younger one and rolls her eyes. “shut up. are you picking up what i’m putting down?”

“yeah, no, oh my god it’s real.”

“but they’re not dating…” minji thinks to herself, pinching the bridge of her nose. “wait, are they… do they even like girls?”

“oh yeah, danielle mentioned it like, twice, but she thinks it’s not a big deal. but yeah, she likes girls. i think y/n mentioned it once too, they’re both just not open about it i guess?”

minji clicks her tongue. “so they’re probably in love and pining, they’re oblivious.”

“what do we even do with this information?” hanni asks. 

they both ponder the possible outcomes, weighing the positive and negative consequences of you and danielle becoming a couple or continuing to pine for each other. if you two stayed in the limbo of unspoken looks, flirting, and loving gestures, the status quo would remain, but it might cause tension. on the other hand, if you two became a thing and eventually broke up, it could create a rocky dynamic within the group. 

however, minji knows you well. you’re mature and have been through a lot, so she believes you’d be able to handle it professionally. danielle, on the other hand, might struggle more with the fallout. but if the relationship lasted, it would bring happiness and joy, despite the challenges of dating as an idol and concealing so much. the two of you would be happy – you’re already happy as is to be part of the group and know each other – and so would the other members. 

the thought of this potential happiness brings a soft smile to minji’s face as she considers the best path forward for everyone involved.

minji leans into hanni’s pillow and closes her eyes – she looks like an overworked therapist. “we shouldn’t intervene.”

“let things flow naturally?”

“yeah, but with the knowledge that they’re in love i guess.”

“so it’s actually like an angsty, intense romance drama.”

“they’re our friends idiot… more like a romcom, it’s not that bad.”

the two laugh and decide to call it a night, promising to run to each other with information and thoughts on every single thing that happens to the two of you.

(they can still be fans of the two of you despite being part of the group itself, and that as a guilty pleasure isn’t the worst thing in the world.)

-

your birthday falls right before the break you have, just a few promotions to get through and you’re set.

unfortunately, you’re not able to see your grandparents during the first week of your vacation since they’ve had a few complications with flights and their work. however, they’ll be coming to visit you in the second week, staying a little longer despite you having to work. because of this, you'll have plenty of time to spend with them and show them around seoul. 

plus, they’ll get to meet your members, and you can already envision how much they’ll baby and spoil everyone. the thought of your grandparents showering your friends with affection, gifts, and really just their love and charm brings a smile to your face, and you can’t wait for them to experience the warmth and love you’ve always cherished. 

every birthday for each member includes a special livestream, and today, it’s your turn. 

despite it being your birthday, a heavy feeling of sadness lingers, overshadowing the excitement as you all set up. you should be happy, and you are with the members around you by your side on your day, but you’re still not completely you the absence of danielle gnaws at your heart. everyone except her surrounds you, and you try to mask how terrible you feel without her presence as you prepare for the broadcast. she apparently had something very important in her schedule that would last until the late evening, leaving you to celebrate without her.

[danielle] im so sorry i can’t be there for you ☹️ i wanted to be there but they’ve shoved this into my schedule since the break is soon im so sorry sweetheart i’ll make it up to you as best as i can, promise i love you, i’m sorry i’m so so so sorry

you remember seeing danielle's messages two hours after noon. the instant you read them, your shoulders dropped, your smile faded, and all the excitement drained from your body. those texts still haunt you, a constant reminder of her absence on a day you wanted her by your side the most.

[y/n] it’s okay, don’t worry about it.

you put on your best facade, greeting the viewers with a joyful, upbeat tone, but the rest of the members can see through it. the light in your eyes is dimmed, your smile not as genuine as usual. hyein notices and rubs your hand under the table, offering silent support, trying to lift your spirits on your special day. the others chime in with their own attempts to cheer you up, but the void left by danielle’s absence is hard to fill.

you force a smile. “i’m surrounded by most of my members! i’m very happy to be with them on my special day.”

hyein puts her arm around your shoulder and squeezes you close to hug you from the side, making you giggle. “she’s getting older and older and older… please wish her a long life everyone.”

“hey! i’m not that old…”

“if y/n is old then what am i?” minji questions, quirking a brow at the youngest.

“ancient.”

“hey!”

your members start to bicker playfully, and it washes away a good amount of your worries. the smile on your face stays, though it falters now and then. despite the sadness lurking in the background, you're grateful to be surrounded by those who have supported you. their presence and antics bring some light to your birthday, helping you feel a bit more at ease.

hanni suddenly grips your shoulders, making you jump. “okay~ time for the birthday girls’ gifts!”

she makes you giggle, then moves out of frame to grab a wrapped box. she hands it to you – not without accidentally hitting your head, making you and the members gasp and chuckle – then lets you examine the exterior.

“you’ll love it man.” you roll her eyes at her confident tone.

everyone watches you unwrap the gift, hyein snorts as she watches you struggle to open the box up, having to find a pen to stab it and rip the seal. there are a few things inside, but you grab the larger item out and gasp when you see it. 

“hanni you’re– oh my god.” you gaze at the signed daniel caesar vinyl in your hands, mouth wide open. “hanni.”

“yes?”

you stand up immediately to hug her tight, engulfing her in your arms as you sway in place. “thank you so much.”

she rubs your back and hugs you back with the same energy. “seems like my present will be hard to beat, that so?”

you pull away and scoff playfully, sitting back down to inspect whatever else is inside the box. “don’t make it a competition!”

the rest of the live continues, most of your sorrow completely lifted after opening each present. minji gives you a cap with your name on it, along with a necklace you had been eyeing for months, some stationary, and your favorite candies from back home. you marvel at how she managed to get a bag of your favorite sweets, but she just shrugs with a smirk plastered on her face, clearly enjoying the mystery.

haerin’s gift is thoughtful and cute. you ‘re given three different koala keychains (your representative and favorite animal), a cat shirt, a new ds game, and blue light glasses. haerin is attentive to everything, but it still surprised you that she remembered you were missing the ‘y’ version of your favorite pokemon game – and your glasses that you had bought a month ago. she also hands you a letter, it’s full of words that will probably make you tear up later, so you decide to tuck it away for the time being.

hyein gifts you something that makes you laugh until you're leaning against her, nearly crying. her bag contains new earrings that match your style perfectly and your favorite disney movie on dvd. the real kicker, though, is an oversized shirt featuring a popular baby picture of you photoshopped boldly on the front. in the picture, your six-year-old self is sleeping with your head turned uncomfortably and drool seeping from the corner of your lips. the sloppy masking of the image only adds to how hilarious it is, making hanni and minji hold onto each other as they cackle, while haerin has to move out of frame to hide her amusement. 

“how did you even get this made?” you ask the youngest member, still clinging onto her and laughing in between words. “oh my god, this is insane.”

“do you like it?”

“i love it hyeinie.” you press a short peck to the top of her head, then pat down her hair. “it’s wonderful.”

she’s smiling brightly, happy that you’re not as sad as before and that you love her gift. hyein has always been full of love and care.

you begin to organize the presents again, looking back at all of them and feeling like the luckiest, happiest girl in the world. after hugging all of your members again, nearly crushing them from how grateful you are.

haerin then brings your cake back in frame, tugging on your sleeve to grab your attention. 

 you clap your hands. “ah! yes, let’s blow the candle.”

it’s really simple, mundane, and everyone does it – blowing a cake and all, despite yours not being edible – but it makes your cheeks hurt from how much you smile. everyone enthusiastically sings ‘happy birthday’ and you sit there like a child all giddy. once they’re all done, you close your eyes and clasp your hands, making a silent wish in your head.

most of the wishes are simply you wishing for your grandparents to be well and healthy, and you wished the same for your members. you also wished for one more thing, something on a whim, but it would make you even happier than you are right now.

i wish danielle were here.

you silently go over each wish again, unaware of hanni opening the door behind you, someone walking in silently and quickly rushing over to stand behind you. 

opening your eyes, you grin and blow the candles out, then jump and shout in surprise when you feeling someone’s arms around you and their body pressed against you from behind.

danielles scent is recognizable, and so is her voice, heavy with accent. “happy birthday!”

you turn around in surprise, looking up at her with wide eyes and your jaw dropped. she moves her hand to the crook of your neck, the other resting on your shoulder as she looks at your expression.

“dani? you– you said you couldn’t–”

“i’m sorry, i had to pick up your present and surprise you. was it too harsh?”

you felt you heart break into pieces when you had received her texts, but still answer, “no, absolutely not.”

she hugs you again and you sink into her embrace. minji and hanni exchange knowing glances, hyein and haerin just smile at how sweet the moment it is. 

you end the live shortly after, with danielle explaining to the viewers that her present for you is something very special that she needs to show off-camera. the group continues chatting about you and your birthday, with haerin snickering at hyein’s remarks. danielle stays where she is, standing behind your chair with her arms around you, her fingers grazing your skin in a way that makes you swoon. minji and hanni silently communicate with each other through their eyes and brows, sharing a knowing look about the bond between you and danielle.

you couldn’t be any happier.

–

it turns out that you can be happier.

once the livestream ends, you all help clean up the studio. minji tries to suck in helium from the balloons, while hanni and hyein run around trying to stop her, adding to the lighthearted chaos. despite the playful antics, the six of you manage to clean up quickly. each member hugs you tightly, danielle hugging you last. as she pulls away, she gives a look to each of the members, silently sending them off with goodbyes and “see you back at home’s.” soon, it’s just you and danielle back in the empty studio after she had dragged you back inside.

“i’m sorry again, but i had to grab you some special things.”

“it’s okay, really.” you lie, knowing you probably would’ve went back home and sulked for a bit. you look at the bag in her hands, then giggle. “is that for me?”

“yes miss birthday girl!” 

you laugh and she hands you the bag, it’s smaller than everyone elses, but that doesn’t matter at all.

reaching in, you feel something fluffy. you pull out a small teddy bear about twice the size of your hands, feeling your lips turn up. it’s a bear with a flower in its hand and a small flower crown on top of its head. it’s adorable, but not as much as danielle.

“dani,” you pull her in for another hug. “this is so cute.”

“mhm.” she mumbles, pulling away. “press on its chest.”

“what?”

“just do it.”

you comply, you thumb adding pressure and feeling a small click. there’s a small sound that starts to play, and as soon as you hear the familiar voices, you almost break.

“hi y/n! we miss you and love you and are so so proud of you.” the sound of your grandpa’s voice in the recording makes you freeze.

your grandma speaks next, “we miss you and love you to death. keep it up! you are so amazing and the greatest gift ever, you’ve got this.” 

they both speak at the same time next, saying, “from your favorite bunnies: we love you y/n!”

danielle is a little scared as she watches you frozen in place, still clutching the bear she gave you. your lip trembles slightly, and she hears a slight shake in your breath. you stare at the bear in shock, then look up at danielle with tears brimming in your eyes. her heart aches, unsure if your reaction is good or bad, and she takes a hesitant step closer, her voice soft and concerned.

"hey, are you okay?" she asks, reaching out gently to touch your arm. 

you grab her wrist and pull her in, engulfing her in the warmest hug you’ve given. “danielle, this is the best gift i’ve ever received.” she can hear you starting to sniffle, not letting go of you and letting your tears stain her hair. “thank you so much, i– i really needed this. you’re seriously the most thoughtful person i know and i just, i can’t explain how much this means to me.”

danielle's heart swells with relief and affection. she hugs you tighter, resting her chin on your shoulder. "i'm so glad you like it," she whispers. "you mean a lot to me, and i wanted to give you something special, something that shows how much i care."

you pull back slightly to look at her, your eyes still glistening with tears. "it’s perfect," you say, your voice choked with emotion. "you’re perfect, oh my god, i love you so much.” 

danielle smiles, brushing a stray tear from your cheek. "i’m glad you like it, happy birthday.” she says softly.

-

“yes, i got it. i can’t believe danielle did all this for me.” you face your ipad, smiling at your grandparents. “i cried you know!”

your grandmas eyes smile with her and you can see the slight wrinkles in the corner of them. “aw, at least they were happy tears. your member, she reached out to us first you know? what a sweetheart…”

“danielle cares for you a lot, you know? she’s a great friend, you keep her close, okay?” your grandpa adds.

friend. the word rings in your ear, stinging a little. danielle is sweeter than honey, caring, loving, and she’s the reason your transition to moving away from home was easier. at the end of the day, no matter how touchy she is with you, how many flirtatious comments and affectionate gestures she gives; danielle is your friend. 

at least she’s in your life, you’re grateful for just that.

“yeah,” you chuckle, it’s bittersweet leaving you. “she’s a great friend.”

your grandma leans closer to the camera, smirking. “but if i had to take a guess, i don’t think you’re just a friend to her.”

an awkward laugh leaves your lips. “what are you on about?”

“friends don’t do things as significant as this. your grandpa was my ‘friend’ in college, but none of my friends did the things he did. did the rest of your members do something like this? she cares about you deeply, im sure the other members do too, but this is different y/n.”

“i mean, my members also gave me great gifts.”

“sweetie, danielle reached out to us via facebook and set up a whole thing in order to get this for you.”

“and i’ve seen your little videos with the members, she looks at you differently and clings onto you more than haerin. that says a lot.” your grandpa adds on, raising his brows. 

your cheeks start to burn, you roll your eyes and scoff. “i think you’re looking into it too far, seriously. she’s my coworker and friend.”

“y/n, follow your heart. you adore her and you’re trying to push away the feeling because you’re scared of rejection.” your grandma was very good at reading you. too good. “don’t suppress and run away because you’re scared, things will work out.”

“i don’t even know if she likes girls like that, i mean, danielle–”

without any warning, the door of your room is opened suddenly and you jump, dropping your ipad on the mattress and letting out a small yelp.

danielle stands int he doorway in her pajamas. “hey! oh sorry– did i interrupt? sorry i’ll come back later–” 

“no! i mean, no.” you clear your throat. “d-did you need something?”

your grandparents can only see the ceiling, but they still hear danielle, “ah, well, i’ll just tell you later when you’re done. are you calling your grandparents?”

“danielle? is that you?” your grandma calls out. “dear, let me see her.”

picking up the ipad and setting it upright again, danielle walks over to where you sit on the bed and leans over so her head is in frame. “mrs. and mr. l/n! hi, how are you?”

“oh danielle, it’s lovely to see you! we’re doing great.” your grandpa responds. 

you scoot over and pat down the space next to you, mumbling softly to danielle, “sit here.”

“you sure? i didn’t interrupt, i’ll just say hi and–”

danielle feels you grab her wrist, pulling her down so she’s next to you now. “it’s fine, i swear.” you assure, and danielle just nods.

“oh gosh, you get prettier each time i see you.” your grandpa says in awe (he gets it). “how did y/n react? tell us the full details.”

the member beside you laughs, it’s music to your ears. 

“she just stared at it while the audio played and… cried.” she turns to look at you with apologetic eyes. “it was very emotional, but i can assure she loved it. did you?”

“yeah.” you mutter, eyes on danielle as she speaks.

“aw, how adorable. well, we actually have to go. you had something to tell our granddaughter?”

your grandma and grandpa want you dead.

“aw, well i hope to talk to you two for longer next time! stay safe and healthy– oh! and speedy recovery to you mrs. l/n!”

“thanks dear, goodnight you two! happy birthday, we love you.” is the last thing your grandpa says before your grandma blows you a kiss and waves goodbye. the call ends a second later, leaving you and danielle alone.

she turns her head, your faces find themselves a hand apart.

“your grandparents are so lovely.”

you look at her like an idiot. “yeah.”

“i’m sorry to cut your call short, really–”

“no! no, it’s okay. what did you want to tell me?”

“well,” she starts, her gaze fixed on her hands. she looks nervous, and it makes you nervous as well. “i kind of was wondering…” you gulp, hearing the hesitation in her voice. she does that thing, the little nervous lip bite that’s both adorable and nerve-racking at the same time. “you know, the vacation we have is soon, and you’re here in seoul for the first week. i figured that might be boring, considering all of us will be out and with family, you know? and you, you’re still here.”

her words hang in the air, the weight of her uncertainty pressing down on both of you. you can feel the anticipation building, your heart pounding in your chest as you try to decipher her intentions. the idea of spending the first week of vacation alone had been a bit daunting, and the thought that danielle had been thinking about you, about your potential loneliness, makes your heart swell with a mix of hope and anxiety.

“and…?”

“well…” you focus on each curve of her side profile, eyes softening as she continues. “how does australia sound? with me, my hometown to be exact. oh! but only for a few days of course! i know your grandparents are visiting and yeah, that’s– that’s what i wanted to ask.”

you can’t help but chuckle at how she fiddles her fingers, how she avoids your gaze, and really just her all nervous like this. it’s cute, she’s cute. 

(everytime you’re with her, it seems that you fall more and more.

it seems impossible, but she finds a way to make it possible everytime.)

“danielle, i mean, this is so sudden but i would love to.” you reach out to put a hand on hers, danielle feels her heartbeat start to simmer back into its normal pace. “your family is fine with it?”

“they’re the ones who suggested it actually, and i know that one time when we were trainees you said you always wanted to visit where i grew up and i got giddy that time just thinking about it so of course i jumped at the idea and–” she cuts herself off after looking back up to see you. you’re grinning and your head is leaning against the headboard now. “sorry, i’m–”

“no, i like it. i’ll go.”

danielle sighs in relief. “okay good because i had bought the tickets a month ago when you mentioned staying in seoul for a week–”

“what?” 

all you can do is laugh again, making danielle laugh too. 

-

the first interaction you had with danielle had already piqued your curiosity. the memory replays in your head as you wait for the coffee you had ordered in the airport.

you were a new trainee, fumbling through the maze of hallways in search of the training room you had been reassigned to at the last minute. your korean was rudimentary at best—reading it was manageable, but grasping the full meaning took considerable effort and time. conversations were a challenge, your speech a mix of broken sentences and unintentional informalities that made interactions awkward.

every sign you passed seemed to blur together, each character a puzzle you struggled to piece together. the unfamiliar surroundings only heightened your anxiety, making every misstep feel monumental. your heart raced with a mix of frustration and determination as you looked down at the paper in your hand, clearly too focused on it as you collided with someone.

“shit–” you whisper, then rush out a botched, formal “sorry,”

you look at the girl in front of you, waving her hand and patting herself down. she looks at you worriedly, then says a little too quickly, “im so sorry! are you okay? i should’ve looked where i was going!”

“what?” you say in english. she’s speaking formally, it’s hard to decipher with your limited vocabulary and experience with others. you shake your head and mutter in accented korean, “sorry, w-what did you, um, what did you say?”

“ah,” the realization hits her, your confusion and accent told her enough. “do you speak english?”

her accent is strong, very recognizable which helps your body relax. she’s aussie, thank god. you think to yourself, then nod at the girl. 

“yes, fluently. my korean is not the best, sorry. it takes a bit to understand.”

“it’s no problem! i was just asking if you’re okay– i really should’ve watched where i was going.”

hurriedly, you wave your hands in the air. “no! no. i wasn’t looking, i was trying to read the paper and clashed into you.”

“it’s alright, at least we’re both fine!” you loved her radiant energy the moment you met her. the girl, you had bumped into already seemed to calm you down. even the first meeting, a simple collision, brought you some peace despite all of your stress as a trainee. “you’re having trouble with the paper? let me help.”

you hand her the paper. “thank you so much.”

“no worries, really.” she says before reading. “it says you’re moved to room 153– oh! i was just heading there!”

“really?”

“yeah! come with me!”

“thank you so much… um, your name?”

“danielle! yours?”

you take some time to examine her. danielle is really pretty, and if you hadn’t bumped into her at first you would’ve spent more time admiring her face. she had these beauty marks on her face that could rival any constellation, and the way her eyes lit up without even trying was enough to keep you captivated.

you gulped. “y/n.”

“pretty name.” she says, then grabs your hand and drags you in the other direction. “you know,” she giggles, “maybe it was a miracle that you ran into me.”

it was nothing short of a miracle, and honestly, it felt like something beyond that. had you not bumped into her that day, you might never have found your way to the training room. more importantly, you wouldn’t have met the person who would become your friend. danielle, with her effortless kindness and patience, helped you navigate and bear with the troubles of being a trainee in a place away from home. she assisted you in improving your korean, and provided the emotional support you desperately needed. she was your rock.

without danielle, you would have been lost, both literally and figuratively. her guidance made everything seem less overwhelming; she turned every challenge into a manageable task, and somehow, she managed to stay upbeat too. 

if it weren’t for her, you probably wouldn’t have debuted, you really wouldn’t have come this far.

and without her influence, you wouldn’t be in the airport trying to find her so you can give her that latte she wanted you to order. you catch her in the blue hoodie she had been wearing, walking towards her immediately and watching her eyes crinkle when she sees you. even with her mask on, she’s lovely.

–

seeing danielle reunite with her family almost brings tears to your eyes. she’s crying as she hugs her sister, mom, and dad, you smile at the sight. it’s clear she’s missed them; who wouldn’t miss the people they loved most while being a long flight away?

“oh! y/n, come here!” danielle pulls away from her parents to drag you over by the hand. 

her mom looks you up and down, smiling at your awkward self in your oversized graphic t-shirt and sweatpants. she puts her hands on either side of your shoulder, then pulls you in for a hug. “y/n, it’s great to see you again.”

“likewise.” you hug her back.

danielle’s dad joins in, wrapping his arms around you two as well. “don’t leave me out!” and it prompts danielle’s sister to hug you too.

“hey! i want hugs too!” danielle jumps over, and now you’re engulfed in a multihug, but who would complain?

–

“no really, it’s alright! i don’t want to trouble you any more. i can settle myself in, really.” you’re trying your best to fight off each attempt at helping you relax into the guest room next to danielle’s, dismissing every family member until it’s danielle.

she pouts. “you sure? are you posssiiittivveeee~”

“dani,” you hold her fingers. “i’m so positive that i’m negative.” you put a hand up to interrupt her before she even speaks. “and no that doesn’t mean i need your help, seriously. go see your family, i’ll meet you all soon.”

she’s frowning now. “fine, fine. meet in the living room?”

“yes, i’ll take ten minutes tops.”

“you sure?”

“more positive than a plus sign.”

danielle giggles, and so do you. she holds both of your hands and you two stare at each other for a good while. she’d love to spend a few minutes helping you unpack. the action is mundane, but that’s what she likes to do most with you. she could be watching paint dry and as long as it’s with you, she’d enjoy every second. 

you forget how to breathe for a moment until she releases her hands. she winks at you, then heads out the door, leaving you flushed.

you wonder how you’ll survive for the next few days.

–

you manage to survive the first day. it consists of you following danielle around (not that you’re against it) and your eyes widening with each new sight.

every car ride, your head is angled towards the window, captivated by the passing scenery. danielle’s gaze also falls on the window, but not for the view it offers. instead, she watches you, memorizing your features with a quiet intensity. she already knows every contour of your face by heart; a simple touch, even blindfolded, would be enough for her to recognize you. 

you, however, are too entranced by the world outside to notice her adoration. the vibrant trees, the shimmering water in the distance, and the people going about their lives with smiles on their faces all hold your attention. the landscape unfolds like a living painting, and you are lost in its beauty.

danielle finds her own kind of beauty in watching you, her heart swelling with each small expression of wonder that crosses your face.

from morning to sunset, the day is filled with shared giggles, smiles, and endless affection. danielle leads you to each of her favorite spots in the city, eagerly sharing the anecdotes that make each place special to her. the two of you are like peas in a pod—she talks and talks, and you listen intently, soaking up every word.

as you explore the city together, danielle's excitement is infectious. she points out the café where she first realized espresso based drinks weren’t all that bad. then she takes you to the park where she used to sit and clear her mind, mentioning that she dropped an ice cream cone at a bench near a tall tree as a child. and you learn that the little bookstore tucked away in a quiet alley is where she discovered her favorite novel. each place holds a piece of her heart, and she's sharing it all with you.

(another piece of her heart, you, mingling with the others like puzzle pieces clicking together.)

you let her take as many pictures as she wants, capturing every moment to savor later. whether it's a candid shot of you laughing at one of her stories, a moment where you’re caught of guard, or a scenic view of the sunset you both admire; you pose willingly, knowing how much these memories mean to her. because really, you'll do anything for danielle. her joy is your joy, and her stories are now part of your shared narrative, weaving a tapestry of cherished memories that belong to both of you now.

when the two of you make it back home to her home in the evening after a tiring, eventful day with her and her family, you realize that yeah, you’re in love with her.

you’re in love with her beyond anything, you could breathe danielle.

it’s never been a question, really, loving her and all. but you’ve seen her at each moment in time and your first day with her where she grew up ties the knot tighter. it should hurt your heart, the feeling that it might not be reciprocated, but you’re too distracted by how happy she is to plate everyone’s dinner to let it get to you.

besides, maybe your grandma was right. 

you trust her intuition, but you need some more reassurance.

–

on the second day in the afternoon, you’re helping out her grandparents with cooking pastries. you’re mixing the batter for banana bread and danielle’s chin is on her palm as she watches you attentively. 

a soft tune is playing and you're humming along, the melody bringing a relaxed smile to your face. the family dog, jinni, keeps brushing against your leg, wagging her tail eagerly. your laughter rings out, light and infectious, and danielle can't help but think that your laughter is much more pleasing to the ear than whatever plays in the background. 

danielle's gaze remains fixed on you, a tender smile forming on her lips as she watches you interact with jinni. there's something mesmerizing about the way you move, the way you laugh, and the effortless joy you radiate. 

her reverie is interrupted when her sister taps her shoulder, pulling her back to the present moment. danielle turns, humming softly in response, but her thoughts are still with you, the image of your laughter lingering in her mind.

“dani, you’re in love.”

“lower your voice!” danielle hushes her. “i– i’m not.”

“you look like the lead of a romance film.”

“well,” danielle sighs in defeat after glancing at you again. her grandma has found a small spoon and is scooping a bit of the batter to feed you. your eyes light up, and the way your teeth show could stop a storm, danielle thinks. "ugh, it's just, i adore her."

“that’s evident.”

danielle laughs and playfully nudges her sister, then rests her hadn on her palm again.

“she’s beautiful and sweet and– how could someone not love her?”

“you’ve been in love with her ever since you gushed about the ‘pretty girl not from here that can basically only speak english’ when you were a trainee, dani.”

she groans in response and leans against her sister as she watches you again. you pour the batter into the prepared tray, then look over at danielle. you motion for her to walk over and she gets up immediately, but not before catching the knowing look from her sister.

you hold the spatula up and order, “taste.” before she laughs and licks the batter off of it. you raise your brows. “good, right? it’s not too sweet and the perfect amount of banana.”

“it’s amazing.” she fights the urge to say that you are too.

–

danielle takes you to three beaches on the third day, you enjoy watching her splash her feet around in the water before dragging you in, almost soaking the upper half of your linen pants.

“hey! i don’t have a change of clothes!”

“then be quicker!” she says in between giggles, “don’t be a scaredy cat!”

“i’m not!”

her sister follows the two of you to the pier-like structure, a rocky outcrop covered in green organisms that squish underfoot, eliciting a mix of surprised noises from you and laughter from both danielle and her sister. the scene is serene, with the sound of waves lapping against the rocks in the background. 

danielle takes your hand, guiding you along despite the squishy algae underfoot. she shares another anecdote, this time about how she and her sister used to swim until they were the last ones in the water, far out where the bigger waves crashed. you listen intently, captivated by her storytelling, and without realizing it, your fingers intertwine. her hand may be smaller, but it fits perfectly in yours, as if they were meant to be connected all along.

as danielle reminisces, her eyes sparkle with fond memories, and a soft smile plays on her lips. the gentle breeze ruffles your hair as you both stand there, sharing a moment that feels suspended in time, it really feels like you’re stuck in time and place the longer you stare. her features are highlighted by the rays of sun shining and you can’t seem to take your eyes off of her.

“you guys look like a couple.”

at the same time, you and danielle turn your heads around, cheeks pooling with embarrassment. “hey!” danielle shouts, but her hand doesn’t leave yours, and neither does she step away from you.

the thought of looking like you’re together doesn’t bother you one bit, if anything, it seems right.

–

her, her family, and you all go to the last beach together with clothing suited for swimming. danielle ends up dragging you toward the water eagerly, she makes you trip and fall. the taste of saltwater overwhelms your tongue, and before you know it, you’re grabbing danielle and dragging her down with you.

laughter fills the air, her family joins in on the splashing, and her dad has managed to splash you so hard that you slip and fall again. the feeling is overwhelming, your heart might burst.

after you all spend time in the water, the rest of the time at the beach is spent on a towel where the sand is. you dig your feet into the sand, as you listen to her parents sharing stories that make you smile wide – you’ve already been smiling so much the whole trip, but they manage to make you smile more and more. it’s apparent that danielle is the way she is because of how wonderful her family is, and maybe you’re just as wonderful after being around her these past years.

“y/n, did you go to the beach often when you were younger?”

your head shoots up at the question her mom asked, you hum. 

“mhm.” your feet dig into the sand a little deeper. “we lived a one hour train ride from a really pretty beach, i learned how to swim there. my grandpa used to fish too, he’d catch one or two fish for us and make either a soup or grill it over rice. and sometimes he’d bring his ukulele so my grandma and i could sing as the sun started to set. i would always fall asleep and wake up on his shoulder as we boarded the train, and then on the way home i was always asleep on my grandma.”

it’s silent for a moment until danielle breaks it. “y/n, that’s so sweet.”

“yeah.” you fight back tears, biting your lip and managing a smile. “being at the beach with you all makes me as happy as i was then too.”

“well i’m really glad, your presence has given us much joy.” her dad says. you look up and giggle.

“yes, and i bet making me fall into the water did too.”

everyone laughs at the playful retort. all of you continue to reminisce and enjoy the scene until her mom decides it’s time to get going. danielle lingers near you, her arm linking with yours because she’s cold and you’re allegedly ‘almost as warm as the sun.’

danielle also lets you fall asleep against her, a light snore making her family turn their heads to see her taking a picture of you and smiling.

“you two are adorable, you know.” her mom says softly, not wanting to wake you up.

danielle nods. “she is.”

–

later that night danielle accompanies you on a late night walk. initially, you wanted to go alone to clear your mind – not that you were troubled, but because you needed designated alone time. however, danielle is a worrier, and for you, it’s tenfold.

her arm brushes yours every now and then, she doesn’t fill the silence knowing how you are. the feeling in the air is calming and every worry is gone.

you look ahead and practically breathe out, “dani.”

“yeah?”

“i’m really happy.”

“i’m glad.”

“like, so happy.”

she moves to hold your hand again, your fingers interwining purposefully. “i’m happy that you are.”

"i'm really overwhelmed," you sigh softly, finding respite on a small bench nestled in the park where you've wandered together. sitting beside her, you pause, a mix of happiness and longing evident in your eyes. "seeing you with your family... it just fills me with this warmth. you know, i've never had that closeness with my parents. they've never really understood or supported me. you know how it is." you confess, feeling her reassuring grip tighten around you.

you tilt your head back, gazing up at the sky painted in hues of twilight, a gentle smile gracing your lips. "i'm not jealous, not at all, like, seriously. it's just... i'm so happy. your family is so loving and wonderful, and you," you turn to meet her eyes, heart swelling with affection, "you're just... yeah, really great."

she laughs quietly, leaning against you so her head is on your shoulder.

“well, you’re really great too.”

“maybe.”

“definitely.”

-

danielle coaxes you into staying in her room for a bit. she’s laid next to you on her phone and you can hear the small breaths she takes. you’re hyperaware of everything, despite being on your phone. 

you notice the way she curls up closer to you, how she puts her phone down and turns to stare at you.

“what?”

“nothing, you can keep going on your phone.”

“well now i don’t want to.”

“aw, i guess you’ll have to pay attention to me then.”

your features soften upon meeting her.

danielle has always been a sight for sore eyes. you really just wanted to pursue your dreams, singing, dancing, and being on stage. you didn’t expect to be lying next to someone so ethereal, eyes bright even in the dimmed room, making your heart skip a few beats here and there. 

what are you thinking? you want to question, you want to know if she sees the same glow in you as you do with her. is this okay? what do we have?

“you’ve always been so pretty y/n.” she breaks the silence. her hand reaches over and her kunckles graze your skin. “i can never stop staring.”

uneasiness settles in, your heart starts to roll around in your chest. it’s terrifying, the thought that everything could be mutual. you’ve always been avoidant, and especially now with her staring at you like you’re the world and beyond, you’re trying to escape her hold. 

you turn your head away to face the ceiling. “you praise me too much.”

“everytime i look at you i think… you’re the person i want to wake up next to everyday, i want to cook us breakfast and make you more than just a bowl of yogurt and berries and–” you turn to face her again, and now she’s closer. “i want to be the one that sees the sun hit your face first thing in the morning.”

“danielle i–” it’s terrifying, you never thought you’d get this far. the drowsiness and the fact that it’s past twelve makes you hesitate, people just say things at this hour. “i should go to sleep.”

“stay,” she holds your wrist.

“i’m scared.”

her eyes soften. “of?”

your lips part, and suddenly, you can't recall why fear ever gripped you in the first place. allowing yourself to be embraced by the affection of the other members had been a daunting step, but growing under danielle's adoration felt as effortless as reciting your abcs. it came naturally, flowing with ease and simplicity. there was never a need to second-guess, never a hesitation.

she blinks, then her eyes land on your lips, and back to your eyes.

“i, i don’t know.”

“then stay.” she mumbles, her voice is soft and low before she takes your breath away.

she kisses you and everything around you fades into nothing because all you can focus on is her. the way her hand holds your face, so gently as if you might break if it were any rougher, makes you melt. you’ve never kissed anyone, but thankfully she’s the first. and the soft feeling of her top lip sliding in between your own lips makes you think that you really want her to be the last too.

she pulls away and you both pause for a moment, basking in the moment before meeting again. flowers bloom, waves crash, thunder claps; danielle is kissing you and nothing has every felt better.

the two of you pull away to stare at each other in awe, that is, until you lean in eagerly again it catches her by surprise. her arms are around your neck and she starts to giggle as you climb on top of her, peppering kisses along the curve of her jaw, down to her neck, and the dip of her collarbone. 

“i love you.” it sounds out like a prayer.

“i love you more.”

“no way.” you roll your eyes before attacking her with kisses again until she’s trying to push you off from how ticklish it all is.

the night draws to a close with your head nestled comfortably on danielle's shoulder, her fingers gently tracing soothing patterns on your scalp. a sense of calm settles over you both, sleep slowly claiming your consciousness. your heartbeats synchronize and your breathing steadies, the shared intimacy deepens, until you’re cocooned in a mutual understanding.

in the quiet of the night, danielle shifts, prompting you to instinctively roll closer, draping an arm over her from behind. your hands find each other naturally, fingers intertwining even while you’re both dead asleep.

-

[danielle PHONING update]

🐶: hi everyone! i’ve been on vacation 🐶: i’ve never been happier, really. 🐶: take care of yourselves and stay healthy! 🐶: i’m very happy, seriously attachment: six images

minji stares at the notification, still half asleep, but as she scrolls through each photo, a soft smile graces her lips. she admires the picturesque beach view, the shirt danielle had bought, and the adorable snapshot of her dog.

her eyes widen with surprise at the last three pictures, but a warmth spreads through her heart. in the first, she sees the side of your face against a backdrop of a stunning sunset. the next captures you and danielle leaning into each other, a moment of intimacy frozen in time. the final photo shows you gazing into the distance, danielle's hand playfully squishing your cheeks together, both of you making silly duck faces with laughter lighting up your eyes.

and then another notification pops up, making minji nearly choke on the water she had sipped on.

[danielle PHONING update]

🐶: almost forgot this one ;-) attachment: one image

the picture shows you being kissed on the cheek by danielle, your cheeks burning from the contact. 

a few seconds later she gets a call, the contact ‘bbang hanni’ popping up at the top of her screen. minji picks up immediately.

“did you see?”

“i saw.” minji says, still staring at the picture. “we are so interrogating them when they’re back.”

“good cop bad cop?”

“good cop bad cop.”

[sserajeans]

let's get this straight!

danielle marsh x fem! reader

synopsis: danielle is affectionate. y/n? even more. after months of confusion, danielle finally confronts her.

others + genre: 6th member reader, 05 liner reader, daerin bffs, y/n is literally over-affectionate to danielle ONLY, daniy/n being the same age plays in their dynamics (they banter more freely basically) + fluff!!

notes: requested, I TRIED TO MAKE IT AS LONG AS POSSIBLE BUT IDK WHY THE BRAIN ISN'T SLAYING.... I RLY HOPE U ENJOY.. idk why i never proofread....

danielle has always been known to be affectionate. the human depiction of sunshine in every single way possible. she just loves to love! and that goes especially for her members.

but you were a different case. if one would rate danielle’s affection a 10/10, you broke the scale. and much to your members’ dismay (just hanni and hyein’s), this scale-breaking affection was only directed to little ms sunshine herself.

and it’s not that danielle hated it, she could just never get used to it. someone being more affectionate and loving than her? why were you that doting with her anyways?

it drove her crazy thinking about it. she was always clingy with her members, never missing out a single opportunity to show her love for them, but when it’s you everything became a struggle.

haerin would know all about the toll your affection has taken on dani. she was her go-to whenever her head was full of you, and the younger always had one consistent response.

“she likes you, you like her. do me a favor and date.”

example 1:

whoever had the idea of watching a horror movie (hyein) was dead to you.

no one knew why watching a horror movie half of the group didn’t enjoy was a way to celebrate the release of attention’s music video, but no one could resist hyein. what hyein wants, hyein gets.

because now you were tucking your legs under your oversized hoodie, blanket covering most of your face, and all of it when a jumpscare came on screen.

and of course, because the star align in your favor, one final jumpscare had you jumping 1cm from the couch, and just your luck.

danielle was right beside you.

your arms wrapped around her frame almost immediately, and usually she’d shift a bit due to the sudden movement, but the moment she heard your mild shaking she felt so bad.

your head rested on between her neck and shoulder, eyes shut as you could still hear from the dialogue that the murder scene was definitely still playing.

she hated how you could read her so well, because the moment you realized her face was warming up since you were clinging onto her, a smug look on your face grew rapidly. suddenly the horror movie was forgotten.

“ohh… did i just make the danielle marsh blush?” you whispered carefully in english, making sure none of the other girls heard you.

you swore a smile flashed on her face before she replaced it with a very forced poker face.

“you wanna watch this movie alone?” she looked to her right, realizing hanni and hyein dozed off, haerin was on her phone, and minji left for “toilet issues”.

you playfully rolled your eyes before keeping your mouth shut, pulling yourself closer to danielle as the movie continued playing.

haerin had it all on video.

example 2:

the girls were in the salon getting their hair dyed and cut. it was a mixture of nervousness and excitement that filled the room, but more the former for danielle.

“unnie, there’s seriously nothing to worry about. you look nice with the new cut.” haerin stated as she stood up to replace danielle’s spot on the salon chair.

“it’s good! i’m just a bit worried… our fans always talk about our longer natural hair so i just hope they like this just as much…” the older muttered as she took haerin’s place on the couch behind the 3 salon chairs.

and right on cue, you walked in, hair wrapped in a towel as your hair stylist had just finished the final rinse before unveiling a blue color that complemented hanni’s purple very well.

you looked up from your phone, overhearing the previous conversation, and hanni (who had just finished her dye and cut) swore she saw your eyes double in size the moment they landed on danielle.

“hey… does your butt hurt? ‘cuz like that fall from heaven looked pr-”

“Y/N!”

“YOU LOOK SO GOOD?”

“...thank you.” her cheeks went up a shade of red, something you never fail to witness. she looked away, conveniently engrossed in a tiktok, before muttering once more. “kinda needed that…”

“i literally can’t breathe right now oh my god.” haerin laughed at the scene in front of her, waving her right hand in front of you to act as a fan blowing air. she’s always been the #1 daniy/n supporter.

“ohh y/n-unnie made dani-unnie so red!” hyein covered her mouth in the most dramatic way possible, to which danielle responded with a shove to her side. hyein made sure to never make her daniy/n comments when she was that close to the aussie ever again.

back to present day, danielle was having another freak out session with her free therapist, haerin.

“because WHY did she do that?!” she was rolling side to side on haerin’s bed, voice muffled by the pillow she covered her face with.

haerin chuckled at the sight of her best friend in distress.

for context, you were today’s ending fairy for OMG, and as the camera zoomed out, you dragged danielle (who was right beside you anyways), and gave her a kiss on the cheek, which left her extremely, super, very, red.

“oh! look at this! #TomatoDani trending #1 on twitter!” haerin pulled out her phone to scroll through the tag, and true enough, the timeline was full of your ending fairy clip, and no one failed to coo at dani’s reaction.

“you’re not helping!” danielle attempted to throw the pillow at haerin, only to fail completely, causing haerin to laugh even more.

“seriously just talk to her. if you actually don’t like it then tell her. she knows boundaries.”

“yes i know! i know that…”

“you kinda like it don’t you.”

“...”

“man i love being right.”

“it’s just so… frustrating!” danielle finally sat up to face haerin eye-to-eye. the cat-eyed girl was pre-occupied with her phone, but the older knew she was listening.

“expand?” haerin was really playing the therapist well right now.

“i just don’t understand, okay? i like how she makes me feel special and everything a-”

“okay so you like her.”

“let me finish…”

“right, sorry!

“and at this point yeah, i can say i like her. but i don’t wanna be the one falling for overly-affectionate straight girl.”

“who said unnie was straight?”

“she worships that harry styles poster like it’s jesus.”

“so does hanni-unnie?”

“that’s not my point!” danielle ruffled her hair with both her hands. who would’ve thought this little crush on you was so taxing.

“listen, you lose nothing if you talk about it with her.”

“what if i’ve been reading things wrong and it gets really embarrassing?” and just like that, danielle was back to crashing her face on another pillow.

“first of all, this is y/n-unnie we’re talking about. secondly, i’m like 99.9% sure she’s at least not straight.” haerin sighed, she just wanted her bed back.

“what if i’m that 0.1%-”

“TALK TO HER!”

haerin wasn’t angry, but danielle knew she was making a point when the younger raised her voice a bit. she begrudgingly left haerin’s room while the owner giving her a thumbs up for encouragement.

hesitantly, she knocked on the door of your shared bedroom with hanni.

“dani? come in!” you knew it was her. no one else knocked on doors that were already open halfway.

she walked in and sat on the foot of your bed, back facing you as you sat up from your previous position. “i don’t know how i’m supposed to talk to you like this you know.”

danielle turned halfway, not wanting to face you completely. something about doing so would make her feel 10x more nervous about the whole situation.

“anyways, what do you need me for?”

“y/ni’venoticedyou’reextraaffectionatetomeandireallylikeyousoiwaswonderingifyoudidtooorifthatwasjustyoubeinginasillygoofym-”

“WOAH! slow down please!” you stood up in surprise and moved to sit beside her.

she took a deep breath, gathering the courage to first, face you. “sorry about that…”

“no worries… could you repeat that?”

“okay! right, sure. so uhm, i know you’re quite affectionate with me. IDON’TMINDIT… by the way. in case you were worried about that.”

you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, you were relieved she was fine with it (after months of acting like she wasn’t), but also because now you had no idea as to where the conversation was headed.

“so uhm… yeah! i like you and i was wondering if you felt the same or if you were straight and joking around this whole time because it’s been messing with me, really, and haerin has been bugging me to talk to you about it just to get things cleared up.”

the moment she looked up from her rambling, she was greeted by a warm smile she grew to be comforted by, rather than flustered. you scratched your head briefly and looked away before chuckling a bit.

this tied a dozen knots in danielle’s stomach, because why weren’t you saying anything? but god that smile was so distracting...

“well, to get things straight, i’m not. and i honestly thought i made it clear…”

“what do you mean?”

“i mean that i like you. i’m pretty sure i wouldn’t give a cheek kiss for someone i didn’t think of that way.” you looked up, pretending to be deep in thought. “i wouldn’t give up my umbrella on a heavy downpour either, or cut myself peeling crab.”

“right." never has danielle blushed this hard in her life. the heat made her feel dizzy at this point. "so whatever this is…?”

“it’s a mutual thing if that’s what you needed to know.” you leaned over slowly with a smile evident on your face. you fixed her hair carefully because some of her layers had gone out of place from her little vent session with haerin. and honestly, your gentle touch only drove her crazier.

“right, where do we go from here?”

“dating sounds really nice, no?”

“yeah, it does.” you both smiled, resting your forehead against hers with both of your eyes shut. it was an exhausting day.

you later found out the next morning that hanni (under hyein’s orders) left her phone to voice record for blackmail. why your roommate even listened to the maknae was beyond you.

[jenscx]

[06] tumblr girls — the love of my life

it was cliché; being in love with danielle marsh, the straightest girl on earth. you thought your feelings were hopeless, until you discover her tumblr blog.

jihye doesn’t know what to do. the revelation that you had known all this time— known about her feelings and affection for you, known about her online persona, known about the side of her that she’s hidden all this time. it’s suffocating. she feels so upset. jihye hasn’t moved from the spot where she last saw you. her parents are sound asleep upstairs and jihye tries to stifle her sobs to not wake them.

she wishes you were joking, just kidding with her. yet, the raw emotion radiating off your words, the apology filled with sorrow and sadness, maybe even regret, it was undeniably true. her knees were weak, wobbling and almost falling off balance.

jihye can’t even tell if this is a whole prank. how could you become her friend so easily just to betray her like that?

her phone vibrates in her bag and as she tries to fish it out with bleary eyes, filled with unshed tears, the flower bouquet staring right at her. each petal glowing with pity and sympathy. a wrenched hand shoots out to grasp her heart, squeezing it in a vice grip.

a choked sob escapes her as she recalls the scene where you had so shyly passed her the bouquet. your bashful smile, the sheepish expression on your face.

god, jihye couldn’t do this right now.

wiping away her tears, she checks her phone. a single message from you.

jeon y/n [10.17pm]:

i’m sorry. i’ll do the project by myself

the project? jihye had totally forgotten about it. she wills herself to move from the same spot, padding to the couch and sinking into the cushion. she doesn’t know how to continue with her school life, having to see you almost every day. it just didn’t make sense how you could play with her feelings so easily. still glaring at your message, jihye lets out a resigned sigh.

the only reason she had even suggested research on human attraction was to try and profess her adoration in a way that wouldn’t be too obvious. but now, what was she meant to do? it felt as if her whole world had collapsed. she didn’t just like you. if it was a simple crush she wouldn’t be feeling this way.

the realisation comes to her hard. this isn’t a mere attraction or infatuation.

it might just be love. she knows now how deep her love runs.

jihye’s so tired of thinking. were all those words of comfort you said to her fake as well? she hadn’t expected you to become her partner in any way. but the moment your name had appeared right next to hers, she knew that she had to use this opportunity to prove something. and right after her stunt in the classroom, seeing you at the football game? jihye bites her lip, thinking about the way you were staring at her. she had pretended not to see you yet, until you had so cutely waved at her. the pure shock overwhelming her, distracting her from the routine and causing her to fall. it was embarrassing, really but your concern for her made up for it.

and the way she had pointed out your jacket! she just couldn’t contain her curiosity and throughout your friendship, you seemed particularly fond of minji. jihye twirls her fingers together, frowning at the thought. you had told her minji and hanni were in a strange situationship but it still didn’t quell her fears that you might have been harbouring some sort of secret feelings for your best friend.

you had confessed to her though. in the midst of your ramble you had explicitly said that you liked her. jihye groans just thinking about it. she doesn’t know what to feel. on one hand, she was betrayed. on the other hand, her crush returned her feelings. why couldn’t you have just not done anything? she would be fine just living with her feelings.

(no she wouldn’t be.)

her finger involuntarily moves to tap on her spotify. it’s the playlist that you made for her playing. jihye feels as if her head might explode. these actions of yours couldn’t be a lie as well, right? she’s going crazy.

this was something straight out of the romance novels she’s read. this isn’t something that would happen to a regular person— how could it be?

she sinks further into the couch. the blouse she had put on previously to look pretty for you itches uncomfortably on her skin. she wants to get rid of the feeling, both physically and emotionally. begrudgingly, jihye brings herself to shower after the taxing day.

that’s what she needs. a cold shower to calm her down.

jihye inhales sharply.

she can get through this. she’s been through many hardships already. this won’t affect her in any way. she’ll just pretend everything was a bad nightmare.

she can get through this, just like she always has.

so that was a lie. jihye cannot get through this. she had gotten out of bed, hair tousled and eyes red from crying. she looked like she had gotten dumped. how could she feel heartbreak without even being in a relationship? the look her mother had on her face was only a testament to how jihye was feeling. wearily, she went to school without eating breakfast. she didn’t have the appetite. it proved to be a bad idea when her stomach growled during the first period. already feeling bad enough, there was a surprise pop quiz for geography that jihye definitely flunked.

not to mention the stares she got from other people in the hallways when she made her way to class. they were most likely questioning why the usually bright and energetic cheerleader was more gloomy than her best friend. even haerin had been confused.

the girl had whispered in her ear conspiratorially, “did she mess up on the date?”

jihye could only laugh wetly, “yeah, kind of.”

maybe the attention from other people was expected, but what wasn’t, was hanni and minji cornering her after school.

she had just finished her last class and she couldn’t wait to leave the school but your friends had swerved to hold her back. the classroom was empty, void of any students left. you had left in a hurry while jihye took her time to pack up. your friends had waited outside before coming in and interrogating her.

“what do you guys want?” jihye tries to ask as nicely as possible but even that comes out harsh.

minji cowers while hanni mumbles, “we want to know what happened between you and… yeah. she’s not herself. well, she’s not okay.”

what about me? jihye wanted to ask. you weren’t the only one affected by this. she remains mum however, choosing not to reply. it would be unsightly to argue with your friends.

“you don’t have to tell us,” minji offers, “we kind of know the whole outline but not the details. are you okay though?”

jihye’s eyes flit upwards. she doesn’t know whether to tell minji and hanni. what if she said something and your friends just relayed it back to you?

sensing her hesitance, hanni says, “we won’t tell her, don’t worry.”

something about the two girls made jihye want to tell them. maybe it was the lack of sympathy in their words, only comforting. they didn’t pity her for being in this situation. it was something jihye needed.

she swallows and states, “she said she likes me.”

both girls’ eyes widened visibly.

“did you reject her?” minji blurts out.

jihye shakes her head, “no, i… i like her too.”

“WHAT?!”

“why’d you reject her?” hanni asks, albeit more calmly than minji’s reaction. jihye only sighs, “because she told me something that betrayed my trust.”

hanni’s face falls into a contemplative look while minji looks flabbergasted. perhaps aghast that her best friend actually had a chance with her crush but ruined it. jihye would think that her expression looks funny if not for the serious matter at hand.

“do you mind telling us more?” she eventually says.

“uhm, only if you don’t tell her anything.”

they exchange a look that makes jihye’s nerves rise before coming to an agreement.

“we swear we won’t,” hanni promises as minji nods feverishly. they don’t look like they would go back on their promise. yet, you didn’t seem like the type to act so rashly either.

“she found out that i liked her,” jihye starts, “because she saw my tumblr blog and she didn’t tell me either until last night. she told me and i… i just couldn’t handle knowing that she saw such a vulnerable and personal side of me.”

“did you not want her to see it?”

“i didn’t. not yet. i was trying to convey my feelings through my actions,” jihye blushes, thinking of the numerous times she’s complimented you, “i thought she was dense. not that she already knew.” even that time when she met you in the library, she had explicitly asked if you liked a song for girls and you had only brushed it off.

hanni scowls, “she’s stupid.”

jihye shrugs. you were stupid. that, she can’t deny.

“are you going to talk to her anytime soon?” minji asks suddenly. jihye doesn’t know if she should. her lips pursed, minji just sighs, “she’s been super depressed lately—”

the girl gets interrupted by hanni elbowing her stomach, shushing her. jihye raises her eyebrows at the way minji just quietens down without a word. she really does listen to hanni, jihye muses, thinking back on your prolonged explanation about your best friends’ relationship with each other.

“we’re not saying that to… y’know, try and get you to talk to her,” hanni says frantically, “but i think you need it as much as she does.” some part of her subconscious mind feels that there’s truth in hanni’s words. jihye needs to set a clear boundary with you.

“just think about it, okay?” the shorter girl whispers softly. jihye nods stiffly.

before she even gets to reply, both minji and hanni leave, hand in hand, might she add. they don’t turn back to look at her and jihye appreciates it. for if they do, they might have seen the broken look in her eyes, farcast and stormy.

you’re lounging on your couch, still thinking about your wrongdoings with jihye. the soft ambiance of the playlist made for her plays in the background while you stare emptily at the blank tv screen. you haven’t felt like this in a long time. defeated and desperate for any semblance of comfort.

on the coffee table lay your laptop, open with the display of your presentation on your project with jihye. it’s completed. you finished it after pulling an all-nighter and you could see jihye’s icon popping up to check in on the progress. your fingers fly out to message her but you manage to restrain yourself, knowing that anything you said now would only widen the irreversible gap you’ve created.

minji and hanni had tried endlessly to cheer you up but to no avail. it seemed like you were just a shell of a person. blank face, blank stares, unwavering expressions of steel. a week has passed since your confession with no further development of your collapsing friendship with jihye.

you glance longingly at the laptop screen again, just as jihye’s icon disappears. there’s a comment left under the last slide.

mo jihye: good job.

it’s so ridiculous that a miniscule remark could cause happiness to bloom within you. jihye really doesn’t need to do much to make you happy. and it’s a sad realisation that this would be the last thing connecting you to the cheerleader.

you can’t believe that weeks worth of getting to befriend jihye has all gone down in the drain because of your own stupidity and recklessness. you had a chance to prove that you weren’t like the rest.

“what are you doing?” your entire body jolts at the sudden question from heejin. she blinks at you, confused at why you were staring so intently at the laptop.

“none of your business.”

heejin scowls before plopping herself right next to you on the couch. “you look ugly. did you cry?”

you groan, “shut up. i’m not okay.”

your sister merely rolls her eyes.

“something to do about that girl that you liked?”

“obviously.”

“why? what happened? and before you tell me to shut up again, this is me trying to be a good older sister,” heejin says, “tell me what’s wrong or else i’ll get mum.”

sighing, you bring your knees up to your chest, curling up beside the armrest of the couch, “i messed up with her and i don’t think she wants me near her.”

“is that why you came home crying?”

your head shoots up, “you saw me?”

heejin shrugs, “just a glimpse of you going into your room. i was getting water for hyunjin.”

the separation from jihye must have hit you hard since you don’t tease heejin about hyunjin.

“did she reject you? is that why? she’s straight?” heejin asks. you shake your head, chuckling sadly, “she likes me back.”

“so? what happened?”

“i can’t tell you, heej. but the way she looked at me that night,” you can already feel your chest constricting in pain from the sheer memory of jihye’s harsh gaze, “i don’t think i can even try to fix this.”

your sister nods understandingly but still retorts, “do or do not. there is no try.”

you’re a little thrown off by her wisdom.

“yoda. star wars episode five,” heejin laughs. what the hell— “it fits though right? you just need to show her that you’re beyond your mistakes.”

“you’re stupid,” her silly remark makes you laugh though. you feel some sort of gratitude for heejin’s dorky behaviour. it gives you comfort knowing that even though your relationship with jihye was hanging by a lifeline, everything else would stay the same.

“show her,” she says firmly, “that you’re serious.”

“how?” it truly is the only question you can ask. showing jihye that you’re serious about her? if you couldn’t portray it as words, how else could you convey such a heartfelt emotion? it wasn’t a discontinuous variation that was measurable.

heejin smiles softly and for the first time, you’re starstruck, wondering how you could have ended up with someone like her by your side.

“that’s all you,” she encourages, “be vulnerable. she’s built up walls around her because she’s afraid of getting hurt. if you can show her your true self, maybe she’ll open up too.”

you nod, swallowing the lump in your throat.

“thanks heej.” you can’t put it into words how thankful you are for your sister’s presence. it’s so overwhelming that it nearly brings tears to your eyes again—

“deadass.”

“that is not what that means—”

just as the clock strikes one, the bell rings. you glance up from your chemistry worksheet and dread starts to accumulate within you. the next class was the one where you had to present your project with jihye and just the mere thought of standing near her had you trembling like a leaf. you had come to terms with the fact that jihye might not forgive you but you at least had to talk to her. now, the only thing left, and the hardest part was to in fact, talk to her.

you gulp just as minji and hanni quieten down, both coming to the same realisation and turning to you hastily. other than heejin, your best friends have been pillars of support for you. even though you didn’t reveal what your exact troubles were, they still stuck by you. it was nice to have someone. you had hoped that jihye had people to take care of her as well. unless she was unaffected by everything but you don’t visit that thought often.

when mr lee strolls into class, he’s sporting a wide grin. you already know where this is headed and soon, your suspicions come through when he flashes on the projector, in big, bold words, the first group’s presentation.

resisting the urge to avert your eyes to jihye’s back, you force your gaze onto your bumbling classmates who head to the front of the class.

of course you don’t notice the way jihye’s body has been tensed up since the start of class.

you barely pay attention to the presentation, subconsciously focusing on your palpitating heart instead. it beats painfully against your ribcage, almost breaking through it. you can’t feel anything but anxiety and fear.

“—thank you for that presentation,” mr lee says as he types fiercely on his laptop, “next is minji and jiwoo.”

you watch your friend walk up to the front, sending her an encouraging smile while hanni chuckles silently.

“begin whenever you want, girls.”

again, you don’t pay attention. nothing is absorbed into your head. the only thing residing there is a blurry haze of bright doe eyes and a gleaming smile. it's scarily similar to the girl sitting just a few rows ahead of you.

a few minutes pass as your eyes eventually end up boring holes into the brunette’s back. your eyes flicker upwards when the class starts applauding. oh. minji and jiwoo both bow and take their seats again.

“alright, i think we have time for one more?” mr lee says to himself, scrolling down on his mouse. he looks up, “jihye and y/n?”

you gulp, standing up with the whispers of comfort from minji and hanni behind you.

(“i hope she doesn’t start crying,” minji mutters.

hanni nods, “that would be bad. but funny.”)

each step you take feels like you’re inching closer to your death. your footsteps resound in your head, echoing louder than the depreciating voices you hear. jihye’s already standing awkwardly in front, fidgeting with her fingers. you don’t dare to raise your head.

“start whenever you’re ready.”

jihye clears her throat, her eyes flitting to the projector screen displaying your presentation.

“we decided to research human attraction,” her voice trails off at the end before coming back stronger, “it’s deeply rooted in our psychology and biology, combining the two, making it an interesting topic. hence, we started with analysing the human brain.” her words, even though they were consistently rehearsed, still felt like music to your ears. you’ve heard her say this exact thing numerous times but anytime that she talks, it feels like time stops.

she stares at you and for a moment, you’re in a daze before you realise it’s your turn.

“there are many forms of attraction; sexual, physical, emotional, romantic and aesthetic. we can be attracted to someone based off their emotional capabilities and not their physical appearance and vice versa,” you click to the next slide, showcasing data and studies from the late nights you’ve spent with jihye researching, “we generally find someone attractive if they have similar interests as us. we believe that they share a common outlook on life and adapt to the same behavioural patterns.”

you don’t need research to prove that true. you know that through all the conversations about music with jihye, it strengthened your liking towards her.

as jihye explains further, you can only gaze longingly at her. she’s never felt so far away from you. even her body language, turned away and facing the class instead of you.

“there’s been numerous studies done on human attraction but no one has been able to accurately define what is attractive to us. due to the complexity of the human mind, we can’t really outright state that something attracts us,” you explain but you can’t disagree further.

you can most definitely define what attracts you. a cheerful and silly girl from australia that’s for sure.

“yet, despite the science and psychology behind human attraction, there’s been a lingering question of whether we truly feel attraction or we’re forced into it. people who are asexual and aromantic may not feel the same as us. attraction can’t be measured. this begs the question of whether attraction is spiritual in nature. some may say that they feel an undeniable connection with another person, deeming it to be their soulmate,” the word leaves a bitter taste on your tongue. it’s scalding and toxic. soulmates. what a phenomenon.

“the idea of fate is popular. maybe the universe has created your destiny in such a way that you would end up with this person no matter what,” jihye says, “that’s what attracts you to someone you barely know.”

you barely knew jihye. she was just another crush out of your league. yet, she still ended up meeting you. was it fate too? you don’t believe in soulmates, but if you did, you would want jihye to be yours.

“their one true love,” jihye repeats, “even though a person can experience multiple forms of attraction. they believe in finding a soul destined for them. there has been no evidence that people are fated for each other. but it’s a nice thought, isn’t it?”

the rest of the presentation goes by in a blur as you think about jihye’s last words. fate. what a funny thing to say. it is a nice thought; to have someone out there, waiting for you to come into their life.

perhaps it truly was fate that you were assigned to be jihye’s partner. maybe every single time you’ve met her, it was fate. and every single time you didn’t, it opened up another reality where you would eventually end up at her door, apologising once more. maybe in every single universe, you were doomed to a life of misery, caused by your own foolishness.

and maybe if you never clicked on her tumblr blog, you would go on with your life, never knowing if that girl in high school ever liked you back.

“—thank you, y/n and jihye.”

you snap out of your reverie when jihye nudges you slightly. blinking a few times, you head back to your seat wobbly.

“are you okay? you kinda zoned out there,” hanni whispers. you nod, still trying to steady your bearings.

everything you’ve thought about. it doesn’t matter anymore. it has never mattered because in the end, you’re not the one destined for jihye. maybe she deserves someone better. someone that has enough confidence to believe in their own capabilities rather than resort to such ways. there was never a need for you to invade her privacy. should you even try to ask for forgiveness anymore?

you still should. because jihye deserves a proper apology, even if you don’t deserve her forgiveness.

“hey, after this i’m gonna stay back to talk to danielle for a bit,” you inform minji and hanni, who both simultaneously light up.

as the class ends, you pack your bag extra slowly, keeping a close eye on jihye. her hands tremble as she packs up. you wonder if she’s okay. everyone soon leaves and just as jihye’s about to exit the door, you voice out, “can we talk?”

her head turns and there’s a look of exasperation and confusion swirling in her eyes before she nods.

“y-you don’t have to say anything… or forgive me but i just want to apologise properly,” you mutter. jihye nods again.

taking a deep breath, you sigh, “i know i really messed up and it was a decision i made consciously. that i won’t deny. i was just desperate and it caused you harm, so i shouldn’t even have the right to continue liking you. but i want you to know that my feelings are true and i’m not lying about liking you. so, i’m sorry for invading your privacy like that.”

jihye tugs on her bag strap nervously, bouncing on her heels as she whispers, “i don’t know if i can do this.”

you feel a sliver of hope and joy that she isn’t outright rejecting you.

“th-that’s okay,” you struggle to mask your happiness, “i just wanted you to know how much you matter to me. if you don’t want to pursue a romantic relationship. i really would like it if we stayed friends too… i just need you in my life, danielle.”

the brunette nimbles on her bottom lip, her face full of uncertainty. you want to squeal at her cuteness. she looks even prettier today, maybe because it’s been so long since you’ve seen her up close. you take the time to admire her facial features in case she gets a restraining order on you.

”i like you too, but…”

“you can’t trust me?” you complete the sentence for her. and even though it hurts, jihye nods. you chuckle, “that’s okay. what can i do for you to trust me again?”

“you really hurt me.”

“i know, i’m sorry.”

jihye frowns, her eyebrows furrowing in concentration, “when did you start liking me?”

“when i moved blocks,” you admit. you have an inkling jihye just wants to embarrass you but even now, you don’t mind. it feels like deja vu when you first confessed, but maybe the girl blocked out everything from that night. you would want to forget it all too. “i saw you in the hallway and kind of got a hallway crush. then i kept noticing you in my classes.”

“what do you like about me?”

oh, this was easy.

“i like a lot of things about you, maybe everything,” your answer brings out a gorgeous blush on her cheeks, “i like the way you smile at everyone, the way you always look for the good in people, the positive outlook you have on life. i really adore the way you smile though.”

jihye turns her face away but you can even spot the redness heating up on her face. now your reply seems a little corny.

“sorry,” you mumble.

“it’s… it’s okay. i appreciate it,” she smiles. oh my god, she smiles— “most people just talk about my looks.”

“you’re beautiful, both in terms of appearance and personality.”

the brunette laughs softly and the sound is so delightful that you could cry. clearly your answers made jihye’s walls shrink slightly.

“i really like you, i swear,” you try to say earnestly, “if you push me away, i’ll accept it but i can’t promise that i’ll stop liking you.”

jihye shakes her head, “you can continue to like me and… i don’t think i want you to stop either.”

your eyes light up as you take in her words.

“does that mean—”

“yes y/n, i’m forgiving you,” jihye sighs. you can barely control yourself when you reach out to embrace the girl, throwing your arms over her shoulders and gripping to the back of her uniform tightly. neither can you contain the tears that fall, your contentment bursting at the seams and the adoration for jihye exploding in your heart. she relaxes in your hold, rubbing your waist gingerly.

“don’t mess up a second time, okay?” she teases cutely. you nod fervently, “i swear i won’t. i like you so much.”

you sigh happily, “thank you, danielle.”

there’s a moment of silence before jihye utters,

“call me jihye.”

masterlist | next

🎙️ author’s note: andddd tumblr girls has officially ended! i’ll try my best to come up with an epilogue of jihye and yn but as of now, this au is finished. thank you to everyone who has supported tumblr girls!! unfortunately i couldn’t finish it on tumblr girl’s one year anniversary (one year damn.) but at least it’s somewhere close LOL anyway i hope that you guys all enjoyed tumblr girls 🤍

[rd0265667]

Danielle x Reader: Lightning can('t) strike twice

Permanent Taglist: @cwpiqwon@justme-idle

"Thank you, please take a seat. The fan-meet will commence shortly" The staff member said, handing you back your ticket. You nodded, moving to the middle of the hall, taking a seat as the tune of Super Shy began blasting through the speakers. The fans around you began clapping to the beat, growing excited and rowdy as the music signified the beginning of the event. You tried to remain serious, wanting to stay focused on your purpose here, but you had to admit you enjoyed the music, tapping your feet to the beat of the music as your lips curled upwards, reminiscing on watching the music video, if not for the music then for a certain someone.

Then, the 5 girls who were the reason for this huge event emerged from the backstage, waving as fans waved and cheered, some with signs of the idols plastered on, others with bags in hands of gifts intended for the idols. Amongst the 5 idols, one of them had a vibrant smile, more vibrant than the other 4 as she waved to the cheering fans, though for a moment, her smile cracked. She cursed her wandering eye, wishing she hadn't seen what she had. Thankfully, her media training kicked in. She regained her composure almost as quickly as she had lost it, plastering a smile on her face.  The event kicked off, lines of excited fans moving along the queue, having a short moment to chat with their idols, giving gifts and expressing admiration for them. Each fan interaction warmed their hearts, happy to interact with the people they performed for. 

However, growing unrest was brewing in one of them.  "Dani, are you okay?" The girl beside her whispered, lightly grabbing her hand and giving her a reassuring a smile. "Yeh Minji-unnie, I am." Danielle tried lying, rather unconvincingly, as Minji's eyebrow arched, obviously unconvinced. Back with you, your worry grew as you noticed an accusatory finger pointed toward you, another girl scowling at you, but hiding it as soon as she could, most likely fearing the repercussions of any aggressive acts. Only the firm grasp of one hand stopped the tremble of the other, your eyes darting around the hall, trying your best to not look at them, for fear of your nerves bubbling up and exploding in your chest.

A rapid tap on the shoulder brought you back to attention, a rather impatient teen beside you urging you to close the gap in the queue. You smiled apologetically, before turning to walk up the queue, noting how close you were to finally getting up on the stage. You took a deep breath, trying to calm down. This was most likely your only chance to make things right, and you had to make it up to her.

You made your way past the first three members, Hanni, Haerin and Hyein. Unaware of who you were, or what you had done, the three members talked to you, asking you about you and your bias. They were excited when they heard you were a doctor, then were in faux disappointment when they heard your bias was Danielle. It was nice talking to the three of them, it helped calm your nerves for what laid ahead of you.

Next was Minji, who greeted you with a sweet smile. You could see the anger in her eyes however, and sense the malice in her tone, though she kept up a sweet facade for the media. "How dare you show up here." Minji said, her smile never fading, and it terrified you. "I want to make things right." You curtly replied, seeing Minji's face turn somewhat judgemental, as if trying to determine your true purpose. "You can't mend what's been broken, especially after you stomped on it. If you really think you deserve her after all that you've put her through, you're a bigger idiot then I first thought you were." Minji's facade dropped for a moment, as if to hammer her point home. She wasn't wrong, and you knew it, but you owed her a try. "I'm an idiot then." You said with a resolute tone, Minji reeling a little in surprise, as if thunderstruck by your words She moved to reply, but she stopped herself, pursing her lips, then nodding, tilting her head towards the last member of the group.

Moving down the line, you stood in front of the person who was once your world.  "Hey Dani." You lightly whispered, terrified to how Danielle would react. Danielle looked up with a mask of uncertainty, though it quickly melted away as she gave you a smile, the smile you had seen when you first fell in love with her. "Dani, I'm s-" You tried to talk, but Danielle quickly cut you off "How've you been?" Danielle asked, taking an album from under the table, preparing to sign it. You looked at her with apprehension, before a small smile flashed on your face. "I've been fine, there's been some problematic patients at the ER but I'm doing fine. How are you? Have you been eating well?" You asked, concern laced in your tone. Danielle stopped her signing, looking at you in shock, causing you to curse yourself. Her face conveyed a sense of forlorn nostalgia, and slight hurt. "I have. Thanks for asking." Danielle replied, before waving you off, causing you to finally notice the queue moving on, the security guard beckoning you to continue. Crestfallen at not being able to do what you came to do, you slowly walked down the stage, before finally noticing a note from Danielle, telling you to stay and meet her after the fanmeet. You felt yourself fill with ecstasy, feeling a pep in your step as you headed to where Danielle had told you to wait.

An hour or so passed, then you saw two figures emerge from the hallway. By now, Minji's facade was all but gone, shooting you a piercing glare as she wrapped a protective arm around Danielle "I'm going to be fine, Minji-unnie, go wait with the girls, I'll be there in a little bit." Danielle whispered to Minji, but she stood unwaveringly, as if not hearing Danielle. Only when Danielle lightly shook her, causing Minji to turn to her. Danielle gave her a small nod, as Minji acknowledged, slowly leaving the room, but never taking her eyes off you.

As Minji left the room, an air of tension and awkwardness filled the room, and it suffocated both you and Danielle. The two of you stood in the room, exchanging glances, almost afraid to make the first move. Eventually though, Danielle had the first word. "Why have you come here?" Danielle asked, her warm tone contrasting the seemingly sharp question. "You." You answered in a straightforward manner, Danielle nodding as if she anticipated that answer. "I mean, what do you hope to accomplish by coming here today?" Danielle's eyes narrowed, a look you had never seen before. "I'm still in love with you Danielle." You blurted out, unable to think of anything else to say, Danielle letting out a slight chuckle. "I find that hard to believe, given how we ended."Danielle commented, running her hand through her hair, turning away from you. "I know I've made mistakes in the past, and I want to make up for them, if you're willing." You said, tone laced with desperation. "Why should I give you a second chance, after all you did? You left me for your career. I was willing to leave everything for you. " Danielle began to clench her fist, anger evident, but still controlled. "Because I was an idiot, Dani. I was an idiot for thinking that any stupid job or career was worth losing you for." You pleaded, voice beginning to crack as the prospect of losing Danielle permanently this time seemed to be a forgone conclusion. "I'm sorry, but no." Turning to face you, Danielle looked at you dead in the eye, a resolute tone, with seeming finality in her voice, but there was a softness to it too, and you had no clue what to make of it. "Dani, please, remember what we said all those years ago? No matter what the other did, we'd always love each other, right? Please." Your last word came out more of a whimper than a coherent word, feeling your world crashing down around you. "I still love you. I've always loved you." Danielle whispered "Even if I do eventually forgive you for what you did, I can never forget what happened. I'm sorry, but I can't be in love with you." Danielle turned away, leaving you in the room, but not before you felt your heart break at her last words "You and me, whatever we are, We hurt too much."

[catslvrr]

bound 2 (falling in love)

danielle marsh x fem!reader | one shot

Synopsis: Good news: Danielle has agreed to be your pretend girlfriend for Christmas so Haerin can stop extorting you of money. Bad news: Danielle is a bit too good at being a pretend girlfriend.

Contains: suggestive and threatening jokes, cursing, obligatory mistletoe scene

Song: Gingerbread Lover — Ivoris, Chevy

“I’m so screwed,” is what you say as you plop on the booth across from Minji.

She makes no movement to greet you, engrossed in some YouTube video titled ‘How Ceramic Tiles Are Made’. She’s never expressed any interest in tiles nor has any history with tiles, but this is not anything unusual for Minji.

She’s also playing the video at an uncomfortable volume, not necessarily on full speaker, but loud enough that the people on the next table over could hear and possibly be annoyed at.

You start digging into your chicken Caesar salad and smile to yourself in amusement as you spot Minji’s finished plate of it as well.

The two of you made a pact to eat healthier. Issue is, there’s this one dessert place two streets down that makes some bomb biscoff cookies, and you always catch each other there at least once a week. There’s a silent agreement that this does not break the pact.

You both sit in silence for a few more minutes until the video is finished — you eating and Minji watching.

Minji takes a loud sip of her hot chocolate when the video transitions to an obnoxious outro. “You were saying?”

You retell the story to her with a mouth full of food, and there are occasional offtopic segues, as there always are.

To sum it up: Your cousin Haerin is a force of evil and strangely has a good memory. Allegedly, you made a wager with her when you were both nine years old that you would get a girlfriend to bring home for Christmas when you turned eighteen.

And apparently, if you didn’t find one, you would have to pay her a hundred dollars.

Two things strike you as absurd: that younger you somehow thought you would be charming enough to get a girlfriend, and that younger you somehow thought you would have a hundred dollars just lying around to spare.

And for some reason, Haerin decided to never remind you of this wager until, of course, yesterday. You obviously didn’t believe her, but it was kind of hard to argue with Haerin.

Not because she’s good at arguing, but because she just stands there with this look in her eyes that makes you uneasy. So, you didn’t bother questioning her because you know there’s no escaping this fate.

So now, you have just a few days to find a girlfriend, because there was no way you were paying money. 

There’s also the matter of pride, too.

“Yeah,” you finish off your monologue. “I texted Hanni if she could be my date, but she just ignored it and sent me some TikTok of a stupid looking dog.”

Minji steals a piece of grilled chicken from you, to which you step on her foot under the table. You pull back your feet in time before she can return the favor. You get a glare instead.

“And Hyein?”

A notification ding stops you before you can speak. You lean forward to look at your phone. “Speaking of Hyein…”

Hyein’s text reads, I think I found someone for you! You two meet at the usual cafe at 12 tomorrow :)

“Okay,” you start. “Good news or bad news first?”

Minji thoughtfully chews on another piece of grilled chicken that she stole. Your plate of salad somehow now sits in the middle of the table instead of right in front of you. “Bad news.”

“Well I want to say the good news first,” you wave the fork in your hand dismissively. You’re pretty sure Minji mumbles “asshole”, but you ignore that as well.

“Good news,” you declare with a smile. “I found a girlfriend.”

Minji is unimpressed.

“Bad news,” you sigh. “I have to talk to said girlfriend who is a stranger.”

She is still unimpressed. “This is why nobody wants you. You don’t talk to anyone outside of us.”

“You don’t get it. It’s part of my mysterious vibe,” you grumble petulantly.

“Well, if you don’t want to socialize like a normal person,” Minji is folding a serviette into some sort of disfigured airplane. “Then consider paying Haerin that one hundred bucks.”

“I would never,” you fold your arms. “And even if I would, I can’t, because I literally only have 76 dollars in my bank account.”

You text Hyein back: you’re the BEST i love u so much xoxoxoxoxo

Minji tries to throw her tissue airplane at you, but it flops unceremoniously into your now empty bowl.

She sighs. “I guess I’m paying for lunch.”

“It’s your turn anyway.”

And that’s the end of the conversation, or at least the conversation concerning your predicament. You both spend the next hour babbling on about recent life updates and rehashing the same old stories over and over again.

“How do I look?”

You have your phone set upright by leaning it on this worn red panda plushie. Its head is permanently twisted after you and Haerin fought for it as kids and ended up ripping it in two, which led to your mom having to stitch it back together. She didn’t do a very good job, clearly.

You see Hanni, or what you think is Hanni, squint at the camera. “Like a bunch of pixels. The connection is so shit that you look like those wendigos from Until Dawn.”

“I’m sure you look fine,” Minji chimes in. This is the first time that she’s spoken since the call started (the call has been going on for half an hour), her camera pointed at her ceiling, and you’re pretty sure she’s half asleep.

“Thanks,” you say. “And I’m pretty sure it’s your WiFi, Hanni.”

You think she’s arguing back, but it’s all a garbled mess, and then the call drops. (It was definitely your WiFi.) You check your appearance one last time before you make your way to the cafe.

The cafe is named “Spill The Beans”, which you find appropriate, because that’s all you ever find yourself doing there. The walk there is a bit long, but the decent prices and good quality make up for it.

Plus, it means that most people would rather go to a cafe that’s closer, so this one has a bit more of a ‘if you know, you know’ vibe to it.

You’re also friends with one of the workers there, and she occasionally sneaks you a free pastry, or even better, gives you gossip about one of the regulars. You smile when you see her signature blonde hair through the window.

The cafe is decorated for Christmas — tinsel stringing on the top and bottom of the windows and cutely drawn candy canes and baubles stuck on the panes. There’s also a cardboard cutout of a snowman holding a coffee cup sitting next to the door. You hear the muffled voice of Mariah Carey.

Your entrance is announced by the light tinkling of the bells. You make your way to the cash register to greet a familiar face.

“It’s beginning to look a latte like Christmas!” Yunjin sings as she twirls clumsily, broomstick in her hand as a microphone. You are forced to stand there and watch this. For some reason, she’s adamant on greeting you with a coffee pun everytime you come in. She has yet to crack a smile from you.

“Stop it,” you groan, scanning the cafe and checking who’s in. There’s only four or five people in right now, most of whom you recognize. She holds the last note, with an unnecessary vibrato, for a few more seconds.

“So,” she leans toward you with an eyebrow raised. “Anything new or interesting you wanna share?”

“Asking for gossip?” You deadpan. “Is that how you take orders now?”

“Just curious,” Yunjin says nonchalantly. “You’re never here alone.”

You give her a scowl. “Don’t act like you don’t know why I’m here.”

There are some things that you can be sure of in life. You know how the saying goes: death, taxes, and Yunjin being all-knowing. She and her little army of spies (spies being her co-workers) are the most nosy people you could ever meet.

You’re pretty sure they consider eavesdropping as their main job, and that the cafe is just a means for them to satisfy their curiosity. (Again, an extremely appropriate cafe name.)

She grins cheekily, dropping her voice to a whisper and tilting her head. “She’s on that table.”

You follow her gaze to the table against the window, where a girl who seems around your age is staring outside like she’s the protagonist of a coming-of-age movie.

Yunjin slides you a slice of a carrot cake and winks. “On the house. Good luck!”

You grab the plate off the counter and slowly make your way toward your future fake girlfriend.

“Hi,” you clear your throat awkwardly as you slip into the seat opposite her. “Danielle, right?”

She enthusiastically nods and smiles. “It’s nice to meet you.”

You slide the plate of carrot cake towards her, to which she gratefully accepts. “Has Hyein filled you in on everything?”

“Hm,” Danielle taps her cheek. “Christmas party, a wager, and me as a fake girlfriend?”

“Sounds about right,” you hum. “Not to be nosy, but is there a reason that you’re doing this? I mean, you’re not getting anything in return.”

“Hyein did say she’d owe me a favor,” she answers with a hint of amusement. “Which I’m sure will come in handy one day. You’re also cute, so it’s a bonus.”

You internally wipe a proud tear. God bless you, Hyein. You make a note to get her something snazzy for Christmas. You were so thankful for Hyein that you didn’t even process the last sentence.

You then realize that you’re just spacing out and probably look a bit crazy, so you quickly clear your throat. “So, we should probably come up with our origin story and all that.”

“We should,” Danielle agrees.

You scratch your nape awkwardly before pulling out a notebook. You have this secret theory that notebooks are a hoax and people just pretend to use them. Which is a bit contradictory for you to say, because you’re using one right now. But you still hold onto that belief.

“So, when did we first meet?”

She seems a bit taken aback by the presence of the notebook, but her face quickly relaxes into a smiling one. “What are your interests? Maybe we share some and that’s how we met.”

“Actually,” you proudly flick to the back of the notebook. “I have prepared for this question.”

It reads: About Me

I like staying indoors

I go to the cafe sometimes

And that cookie place

Cats are cute

?

“Wow,” Danielle says after surveying your notes. “This is a very… extensive list.”

“Anything that can be used for our story?”

“Let’s just say we met at the cafe,” she decides. You nod in agreement.

“And who approached who first?”

“Definitely me.”

You frown and stop writing. “Why definitely?”

“I mean,” Danielle gestures at you vaguely. “We have to make the story realistic.”

“I hope you mean that because I’m too irresistible, not because I can’t talk to anyone.”

She smiles. “…Right. That’s exactly what I meant.”

“Excellent,” you say, continuing to pen down the story. “So, let’s say about three months ago, give or take, you entered the cafe for the first time. And then you saw me, sitting there all cute and pretty, and you knew you just had to ask for my number.”

“Right…”

“And because I’m never here alone, I’ll just say Minji was in the bathroom. I gave you my number, and then we instantly hit it off.”

“And Minji is…?”

“Oh,” you pause. “She’s a dumbass. Don’t worry about her.”

“Okay,” Danielle says slowly. “And our first date?”

“We’ll get to that in a sec,” you tap your pen. “Tell me about yourself.”

“I,” she heaves out as she bends down to reach into her tote bag. “Have also prepared.”

She slaps a folder on the table that resembles a police case file. You feel a sudden wave of affection crash over you. You immediately open it in anticipation.

It’s an in-depth profile of Danielle. There is the technical stuff, of course: name, date of birth, star sign, MBTI. Then, there’s the ‘favorites’ section: color, animal, season, time of day.

“Oh wow,” you run your fingers over the page. “This is more than I expected.”

You turn the page. There’s a ‘fun facts’ section, although you’re not sure if it’s considered fun. Example: “I once broke a tooth from trying to eat a rock. I also choked on it and my friend had to perform the Heimlich maneuver.”

“Oh wow,” you say again, louder this time, and out of concern more than awe. “Was this when you were a kid?”

“No,” Danielle blinks innocently. “Just last year.”

She is fucking insane. How on earth did Hyein find her?

The last page features results that she got from various UQuizzes, like “what romance trope is meant 4 you?” (ironically, she got fake dating) or “which ‘-core’ aesthetic are you?”

“I’ll make sure to study this when I get home,” you stare at the pages in astonishment.

“Sure,” Danielle smiles. “I was thinking our first date could be at the local arcade.”

A memory of Hanni breaking the buttons and joystick of a fighting game flashes in your mind. The joystick somehow flew and hit a worker in the face. To this day, you still have no idea how it happened.

Regardless, you always look back at the memory fondly, especially because Hanni didn’t even end up winning, despite putting her whole body into smashing the buttons.

“Haerin will know that’s a lie,” you grimace. “I’ve been banned from that place for three years now. Long story.”

She looks curious but continues anyway. “How about a classic dinner?”

“Hm,” you purse your lips. “There’s this amazing Korean restaurant that’s a 10 minute walk from this place.”

“And you’re not banned?”

You laugh and shake your head. “No. They make this amazing jjajangmyeon. I’ll have to take you someday.”

“Sounds good,” Danielle’s eyes twinkle. “I think that’s good enough for now. Anything else I should know?”

“The party is on Christmas day, of course. It’ll just be a dinner and some party games, nothing too serious. After the party, our work is all done!”

“And Haerin,” you hesitate. “She’s nosy. But not in an ‘asking questions’ way, but in a staring way. So we have to act really good if we want her to believe us. Like, a real couple and everything. Like-”

Her laugh cuts you off. “You can say PDA, it’s okay.”

You cough and turn to the side to hide the heat rising in your cheeks, but when you look out the window, you see an odd sight.

Across the street, on a bench, there are two suspicious figures sitting. Suspicious meaning wearing sunglasses, a coat, and a scarf despite it being hot today. Suspicious meaning Minji and Hanni.

No fucking way, you think. Those little fuckers.

“-you okay?” Danielle waves her hand in front of you.

“Huh?” You quickly turn back. “Yeah, it’s nothing.”

“I love physical touch,” she admits, although somewhat shyly. “So I’m okay with hugging and holding hands.”

“Good!” You reply stiffly. “Great. Awesome. All done.”

There’s a mix of confusion, concern, and amusement on her face. “I’ll see you soon?”

“Yes,” you slide your phone across the table before opening her file in front of your face to hide your embarrassment. “Let’s text in between so we get used to talking to each other too.”

The two of you exchange numbers and you watch Danielle leave with a smile and a wave. Minji and Hanni proceed to shuffle inside the cafe, sighing in relief as they take off their ‘disguise’.

“Oh my god,” Hanni whines, resting her cheek on your outstretched palm. “I thought I was gonna die outside.”

You retract your hand in disgust, but not before flicking her forehead. “You’re sweaty. And you deserve it.”

“So how did it go?”

You recount everything that happens. Minji makes you pay for her lunch. You now have 46 dollars in your bank account.

When you get home, you hug your red panda plushie and turn on your phone to see a text from Danielle. You spend the next few days talking to her, your feet kicking in the air and a stupid smile on your face.

The day of the Christmas party has arrived. It’s due to start at six in the evening, and exactly three hours before that, Haerin sends you nothing but an ominous text: I will be awaiting you and your girlfriend’s arrival.

You roll out of bed and get ready in the morning, and read through Danielle’s file one last time. You’ve annotated it, adding sticky notes and highlighting it, which is more work than you’ve done for the entirety of university so far.

You make sure to put the matching reindeer headbands that Danielle suggested on before leaving. You drive to pick her up and you try not to weigh the meaning of the warmth blooming in your chest as you see her.

“Hi girlfriend,” Danielle puffs her cheeks out and smiles as she gets in the car. It’s awfully cute.

“Hey.”

“Before I forget,” you reach over into the glove compartment to grab a little box. “I got you a Christmas present.”

Danielle gasps, eyes shining as she opens the box. It’s a gold necklace with a sun pendant. You remember her eyeing it when you went out to the mall.

You don’t expect her to laugh. “What’s so funny?”

She also takes out a little box from her pocket. “I also got you a present.”

God, she even prepared it with a nice ribbon. You unwrap it to find a silver bracelet with a moon pendant. You think you’re a tiny bit delusional for thinking that you two were meant to be, but you let yourself live in this fantasy just for today.

“Oh my god,” you grin. “We’re matching now.”

The both of you put on your respective gifts before you start the car. You instinctively pass her your phone to pick a song. Of course, she puts on Christmas music. You glance at her as she takes out her crochet supplies.

“What are you working on?”

“Nothing much,” Danielle says. “Just a little cat to add to your car. It’s kind of plain.”

Her thoughtfulness makes you feel an out-of-body experience where you want to scream your lungs out and melt into a gay puddle.

You manage to get out one word. “Cool.”

The two of you pass the time by quizzing each other and ironing out the fine details of your ‘relationship’. And belting your hearts out to Christmas songs.

The drive is only an hour or so, and there’s a tender feeling encompassing you as you truly realize that it’s Christmas. Spending time with family is always nice. Receiving presents is too.

You only see Haerin a few times a year, and Christmas is one of them. Despite your bickering and her foreboding aura, she’s still somewhat endearing.

Danielle looks out the window in excitement as you draw closer to Haerin’s house. There’s a large blow-up Santa set up on the lawn that they reuse every year, and a bunch of other generic Christmas decorations.

You can already spot Haerin in the window of the house staring at your car.

Pretending to check your phone, you mutter, “She’s watching us. Let me open the car door for you.”

Danielle only responds with a giggle. You dash outside the car in record time, open the back to get your cookies and presents, and open the car door for her, as planned.

She surprises you with a kiss on the cheek. You’re sputtering and blushing, and she has to drag you toward the house (and lock the car for you).

By the time you come to your senses again, Haerin has vanished.

You heave out a long exhale and your gaze flickers to Danielle. You find that her eyes are already on you. If there was a person who could embody the joy and comfort that Christmas brings, you think that it would be the girl in front of you right now.  

“You ready?”

Danielle brushes a stray strand of hair behind your ear. For a second, you indulge yourself in the yearning of your heart and pretend that this is all real.

“Of course.”

Inside the house is chaotic as always. Everyone’s rushing to finish wrapping gifts, preparing the food, putting plates and cutlery on the table, setting up the TV to play Mario Kart, the usual.

You take Danielle around to introduce her to everyone, and you feel slightly guilty as everyone fawns over her. Haerin is the last person you find.

“Haerin,” you say. She nods in acknowledgment. “This is my girlfriend, Danielle. Danielle, my cousin Haerin.”

“Nice to meet you,” Danielle gushes, letting go of your hand to hug her. “I’ve heard so many stories about the two of you and your adventures.”

“Don’t trust those stories,” Haerin says. “She probably changed it to make her look better.”

You whip your head around. “What the f-”

Danielle winks. “Don’t worry. I know how much of a loser she is.”

You take a deep breath in and force a smile. You must maintain the jolly Christmas spirit.

Haerin gives Danielle a once over before nodding mysteriously. She then stalks off to who knows where. Danielle looks at you with a raised eyebrow.

You pat her shoulder. “That’s a good sign.”

“That felt surprisingly easy…”

“Oh no,” you laugh. “We’re just getting started. They’re going to try separate us-”

With perfect timing, you hear your name being called before you’re dragged into the kitchen.

“Be a dear and help us with the food,” your mom says kindly. (You know this is a facade.) You accept your fate and place down the cookies before starting to cut the vegetables for the turkey.

You try to keep an eye on Danielle, who’s now putting ornaments on the Christmas tree with your other relatives.

The Christmas tree has been around since you were a baby, and if you look closely, there's pieces at the back that is slightly charred. Haerin pushed you, you tripped on your own feet, crashed into the tree, and it fell into the fireplace. Alarms went off, neighbors left the house in a panic, the firefighters were called… it was bad.

You strain your ears and try to hear what questions your family are asking Danielle right now, and you hope it’s nothing too over-the-top or personal. She seems to be taking it well though. Your aunt keeps bringing you new things to do and speaking loudly in an attempt to distract you.

“First girlfriend, huh?” Your mom nudges you with her shoulder.

“Yeah,” you laugh awkwardly. “I’m so lucky, right?”

“She seems good for you.”

You pause your chopping. “It’s only been five minutes, Mom.”

There’s a gleam in her eyes. “That’s all I need. And you finally have a reason to go outside for once.”

You roll your eyes and continue chopping. Your aunt comes in at one point, and together, the two of them grill you about the details of your relationship. The words fall out of your mouth just as you rehearsed.

It’s around half an hour later when you’re finally reunited. The dinner is delicious, as always, and it all feels so good.

The light squeezes on your arm, resting her hand on your thigh under the table, making sure you get the crunchy potatoes because that’s your favorite — it feels so good.

And none of this is real, but as you listen to Danielle bantering with your family, your feelings start to feel more real.

The realization sets your heart aflame, just like the fireplace once did to the Christmas tree.

You’re leaning on the kitchen counter, nursing a can of Sprite as you watch Danielle squeal over Mario Kart (she just got hit by a red shell).

Haerin joins you. She doesn’t announce her entrance but you can sense her presence.

“No money for you,” you smirk.

“No. I guess not.”

Hell yeah. Your bank account is safe. “What do you think of her?”

“She seems too nice for you.”

You elbow her ribs. “Be nice. It’s Christmas.”

“…I’m happy for you.”

“Oh Haerin,” you muster up a sweet voice and open your arms out for a hug. She grabs a knife and holds it in front of her. Nevermind. You take multiple steps backwards.

The race is over, and Danielle finishes in a whopping seventh place. She turns around and looks for you, and smiles when your gazes lock.

You tilt your head, and she tilts her head back in response.

“I’ll be back,” you slither out of the kitchen. “The girlfriend calls.”

You think you hear Haerin scoff but you’re too busy focusing on Danielle. “Did you need something?”

“Yeah,” she says. “Where’s the bathroom?”

“Oh,” you cough. “Sorry, I’ll show you the way.”

You try not to stumble as you hear someone call out “don’t run off and make out!” Thankfully, Danielle takes it well and isn’t weirded out.

You’re unsure if it’s weird to wait outside, but you do it anyway (from a respectable distance) in case she needs anything. When she’s done with her business, the two of you make your way back to the living room, and your worst nightmare (but also a dream deep down) comes true.

Haerin is standing there, with her stupid mischievous smile and Rudolph’s nose on, holding some DIY fishing rod. At the top of that rod hangs a mistletoe.

“Haerin,” you hiss. “Put that down.”

She closes her eyes and pretends she doesn’t hear you. It’s like everyone’s telepathic, because suddenly everyone has their attention turned to you, and they’re egging you on.

“Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!”

This cannot be real, you think. This is some skit or a sick joke.

You turn to Danielle awkwardly.

“A cheek kiss will be enough,” you say apologetically. “We don’t have to-”

She cuts you off with a kiss — a chaste one, but it shocks you nonetheless. You can barely hear the cheers of your family over the pounding of your heartbeat.

Haerin eventually brings you back to Earth by smacking your face with the rod, and everyone’s back to doing whatever they’re doing.

“Sorry,” you see Danielle’s worried face as your vision starts to refocus. “Was that too much?”

“No,” you blurt out. “I’m sorry. Because I actually like you but I just realized that twenty minutes ago and I have to tell you now because I don’t want you to think that I’m using you-”

“I know,” she laughs, grabbing your hand to squeeze. “Me too.”

You blink. “Oh. Cool.”

“…So we’re real girlfriends, right?”

“Yes,” she pokes your nose. “We are.”

“Awesome! Because I was going to ask you to be my fake girlfriend again for New Year’s.”

She rolls her eyes and pulls you back to the living room, and you finally understand, for the first time, all the cheesy Christmas songs.

God bless you, Hyein.