#my earliest memories consisting of me just knowing how much i loved this film

[natsmagi]

happy 1yr anniversary to when the illness festered. i had no idea what i was getting myself into. To think it has been 1 year and im still this fucked up from it. love you wonder game

[vidreview]

VIDREV: "Tim Burton's World of Sadboys" by Infinite Snow Productions

[originally posted april 29 2023]

Not only are you the exact brand of person who Neon Genesis Evangelion is about, you are also the exact brand of person who would completely and confidently miss the point of Neon Genesis Evangelion.

sometimes you come across an essay that says everything you've always wanted to say about a thing but could never quite work out how to fit together all in one place. this is one of my those. like a lot of film-loving millennials who went through an emo phase, Tim Burton holds a very special and deeply complicated place in my heart. the bizarre gothic aesthetics of his worlds brimming over with eccentric freaks captured my imagination as a deeply closeted trans teen who didn't feel normal anywhere [she] went. yes i wanted to be Lydia from Beetlejuice, no i never sat down and questioned what that might say about me personally! some of my earliest childhood memories are of playing with a plastic action figure of Catwoman from Batman Returns. that's not really related to anything, i just wanted to mention accidentally stabbing myself in the hand with one of her ears so hard it drew blood when i was a toddler. so obviously as an aspiring writer with dreams of maybe one day directing movies, Tim Burton felt like the perfect role model for the kind of creator i wanted to be back in 2002.

but as the years went on and Burton revealed himself to be maybe the biggest sellout of his generation, i stopped really thinking about his films and kind of felt embarrassed for having liked them as much as i once did. i think people who grew up with his stuff had this feeling that, like, Edward Scissorhands or whatever was their own personal secret, this little missive from Burton to you that no one else understood, that only you were smart enough to get. but then time happened and suddenly you realized that actually most people liked his stuff, you just didn't get out much. it's sort of like how when you're a teen in 2004 Neon Genesis Evangelion is this niche special interest no one's ever heard of that people would make fun of you for liking if their eyes didn't glaze over halfway through the title, and then you grow up and learn that Eva is the eighth most financially successful anime franchise on planet earth and you're like what

narratively Burton's films are about as socially conservative as you can get while still retaining a veneer of liberal plausible deniability. a couple years ago Maggie Mae Fish did a video dissecting Burton's work that helped clarify a lot of this stuff for me, and ever since then i've been waiting for someone else to pick up that ball and really barrel down into the psychology of the man. don't get me wrong, psychoanalytic media criticism can be dangerous and should only be deployed with excessive caution (and please for the love of god Do Not Quote Freud Jung or Lacan), but Burton's own brand is so surface-level personal and his work far too juiced up with extremely telling themes not to merit at least a little bit of psychoanalysis. i've often idly considered doing it myself, in that "this would make a really good video essay" kind of way when something isn't really in your wheelhouse but maybe would be a fun challenge if you could motivate yourself to care enough, knowing you never will.

enter Tim Burton's World of Sadboys, an essay which does all of this and more. i'm not sure i actually have a whole lot to say about this one, besides that it's everything i hoped it would be from the thumbnail. host Delaney Jordan very succinctly conjures the eternal specter hanging over the Burton oeuvre: that he's one of the vanishingly few directors this century who has had carte blanche to make just about anything he wanted, yet he's consistently chosen to make films about lonely white boys who are sad they can't wear their The Cure t-shirt into the office, and who are honestly quite sick of being unfairly associated with those freaks in the goth scene. the sad truth about Burton that we all had/have to come to terms with is that he's just another boring rich conservative suburbanite, except he wears black and doesn't pay anyone to touch his hair.

this essay does a couple of really smart things structurally. we kick things off with a legendary Orson Welles quote tearing down the scoundrel Woody Allen (read by the hosts of Oddity Roadshow and Critical Bits, the only actual play podcasts i still listen to), a choice that works even if you don't really know anything about Welles or Allen or Burton, and only works better the more you know about them. of course the thumbnail and section titles invoke Evangelion, but you don't really know how this could be relevant until later on when Burton is explicitly framed as a Shinji Ikari type. making that specific historical connection to Welles, within this specific overarching intertextual connection to Evangelion, is just so smart. it's such a galaxy brain framework for an essay and it's why i decided to write up this review.

it works because it gets out of the way. Jordan wastes almost no time hedging bets, making apologies, clarifying asterisks-- i spent most of my time nodding along, delighted for once to be the choir she's preaching to. sometimes i think essayists can let The Point They Want To Make eclipse the simple joy of deconstructing someone else's art. if there's any crime i've committed most as a video essayist myself, it's probably that one. what i appreciate here is, again, Jordan gets it. she gets that it's fun to rubberneck a career like Burton's. he's an easy target that you don't have to feel bad about being kind of mean to, and his work is popular enough that you don't need to waste any time doing recaps. somewhere in the middle i was disappointed to realize she wasn't structurally devoting time to Every Single Film, but by the end i was glad of it. the compulsion to Say Absolutely Everything You Can Possibly Think To Say is strong in the video essayist's heart, and let's be real most of the time that makes for pretty fucking boring essays. maybe it's weird to talk about pacing and flow in the context of a video essay, but here we are. this one just scratches an itch for me with its front to back competence. you can always tell when an essay has been brewing in someone's head for a long time, likely practiced in chunks at parties and social gatherings for years and years until the day of its final refined delivery, and oh how sweet it is when that's an experience you share.

i guess i'll end this on a serious note.

nostalgia has engulfed Hollywood. nothing new can be made because nothing new is a sure bet, so all the big developments in creative tools these days are about composting the culture that already exists. deepfakes, chat-gpt, algorithmic image generation, things of this nature. given this moment in history, i think it's more important than ever that we as adults seriously interrogate the media we're nostalgic for. Disney's place at the center of all this can't be ignored, because it's spent the better part of a century embedding its products into american childhood and thus today has an army of devotees who will defend their frankly kind of mid fairy tale cartoons to the death. Tim Burton, on a much smaller scale, has done precisely the same thing: equating his art with himself, equating loving his art with being on Tim Burton's side rather than simply, you know, enjoying a movie that you saw on tv once. and god, oh dear god, please for heaven's sake let us not even Begin to conversate on the matter of Harry Potter. we live in a moment when the average human person has been so thoroughly dispossessed of any material influence on or connection with the systems and bodies that actually drive civilization, that fiction is the only thing that feels like it belongs to us anymore. it quite demonstrably doesn't, of course, but that's the illusion Disney et al deliberately peddle in order to maintain public acceptance of their monopoly.

given all this, i'll never fail to appreciate an essay that cuts right through the blinders of nostalgia and isn't afraid to dig deep into the core of the issue. i think it's good to be a hater sometimes actually. i think it's good when a critic refuses to humor our culture's simpering deference to corporate robber barons of intellectual property and their endless stable of lazy sellout toadies like Tim Burton. idk man, there's a reason these ghouls want you to love them unconditionally and i really don't think it has anything to do with filling your life with selfless wonder and joy de vivre

anyway it's a good essay with some good laughs, go watch it

[geckosoddysee]

Movies I've watched/rewatched this year tier list!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm gonna do this starting now til the end of the year. Hopefully this art challenge can help me keep up drawing consistently & be a way to improve my skills!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So first up:

Movie:

The Princess & The Frog (2009) Without a doubt it earns that fuckin' GOAT Tier, no question! Ko-Fi Upload.

I tried to emulate the style of the visuals during the song "Almost There", which is my favorite song in the movie. It genuinely makes me feel so motivated when I listen. Like, yeah, I'm almost there. I can do this shit. I'VE CLIMBED THE MOUNTAIN I'VE CROSSED THE RIVER & I'M ALMOST THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anika Noni Rose has like the most insanely amazing singing voice, like, she's SO fucking good. Out of all the disney princess in terms of singing voices, she's my absolute favorite. (THAT I'VE SEEN KEEP IN MIND I HAVEN'T SEEN EVERY DISNEY FILM) I rewatched Princess & The Frog after almost a full decade of not having seen it since I was a kid. It was always my favorite disney film as a kid. As in, it was my favorite 'princess' disney film. I mean when it came out I was 9. It was one that I saw opening weekend because I was so fucking excited for it. I watched the hell out of our DVD of the film til it evenutally broke from overuse. Upon revisiting this film almost a decade later as a 22 year old, that opinion of it being the peak princess movie? Yeah it still holds true. This film is fucking amazing. This is PEAK Disney Fairytale & ALSO TIANA IS THE BEST DISNEY PRINCESS & I WILL FUCKING FIGHT ANYONE ON THAT. Y'ALL KNOW I'M RIGHT & I WILL FUCKIN' SQUARE UP IF YOU TRY TO TALK SHIT CUZ SHE IS THE BEST ONE. Also she was one of my earliest crushes. Like the first time I saw Tiana was the earliest memory I have of genuinely getting fictional crush. She's still a cornerstone in defining the kind of person I feel attracted to. Tiana is just.....man I love her. But also she's definitely way the fuck out of my league lmao. Okay so look, am I probably extremely biased with this film because I have a ton of nostalgia for it? Yes. I can't pretend nostalgia isn't giving this film extra points. I'm far too attatched to it to be truly unbiased. It means too much to me personally to really be 100% objective with my thoughts. But that would be boring. I like emotions. So fuck it.

But also I'm still gonna fucking die on the hill that this is the best princess film Disney ever did. I mean yes I'm incredibly biased because this was a film I cherished dearly as a kid & I am extremely fond of it because of the memories it gave me, but also like, nostalgia is still a genuine reason to love a film. I can acknowledge this movie ain't flawless. It has issues. I know it ain't flawless, the story is kind of a fucking mess & gets needlessly complicated with how the voodoo spell works & like Louis should have had way more screentime because Louis is fucking amazing & I want more of him.

So yeah, this earns an easy GOAT tier for me. Still my favorite princess film.

Also if you have films to suggest for me, please do!!

Sorry if this is messily written, I'm a bit sleep deprived rn. But I hope I did good. I'll try to upload the base image if y'all want me to. I think other folks taking this challenge could be fun. Tho be sure to tag me so I can see. I'd love to see other ppl try this. For me, this is a good way to get myself drawing consistently so I can improve & grow.

[ginkgomoon]

Shaw's Birth Chart- An Astrological Study

Late second birthday gift to Shaw. I haven't done any heavy analyses/studies in a while but I felt happy that I also completed some good solid Shaw content! Please enjoy. *Cries because it's finally done and before June is over.*

What is Astrology?

Astrology is the study of stars- the placements and movements of different celestial bodies to correlate what’s happening on Earth. It comes from the early Latin word astrologia.

There’s a rule that we live by-

As above so below

This means whatever happens within our solar system will ultimately affect us here on Earth. For example, the moon governs our emotions, and since our body is approximately 70% water, why wouldn’t the moon affect us too? But it’s not just us, it's the moon’s gravitational pull on the oceans, in the same sense, it’s also the moodiness you may feel during full moons!

There’s many aspects to Astrology, and that would normally be too much for a single post so I’ll be elaborating on the major contributions to one’s birth chart. This will include the planets and the signs.

There’s the inner planets, consisting of the Sun, Moon, Mercury, Mars and Venus, moving quickly within the chart. Then there’s the outer planets, Jupiter, Saturn, Neptune, Uranus and Pluto, the slower moving planets. And of course, the different signs of the zodiac with different personalities. They follow the order beginning with Aries, then Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Leo, Virgo, Libra, Scorpio, Sagittarius, Capricorn, Aquarius and finally Pisces.

Shaw's Placements

Sun ☉ The Sun represents our character, personal identity and ego. Your star sign is also known as your Sun sign. It is the “you”. The “Self”. It shows your creative force, confidence, focus and our will to live. It’s the driving force of our charts in many ways, like how it is centred in our solar system. It’s the part of us that is the “adult”, censoring the “inner child”, and overall provides information on our vitality, and what we came to do.

Shaw's Sun is in Gemini ♊︎ The air sign of Gemini is famous for their self-expression and communication. Geminis are witty, clever and flexible people. They can easily gain social contacts just as they can easily adapt in various situations and communicate through intellectual conversations. Geminis love to collect and share all sorts of information and are rather seen to be “geniuses”.

Although, they can be easily bored if they’re not getting enough mental stimulation. Geminis with their abilities to detach themselves make them excellent observers, but this can make them very difficult to be close to and be intimate with. People note them to be confusing and hard to understand, but this is because their mind is always active and switching from one topic to another (as they are represented by “the Twins”). Geminis enjoy seeing the “lighter” side of life, making them more fun and pleasing to be around. It’s guaranteed that there is never a dull moment when you’re with a Gemini!

Shaw holds a good representation as a Gemini. He always has a witty remark to say to MC, has a way with words, is shown by how he reacts to “fight or flight” situations, and stresses the usage of his favourite word, “bored”. Shaw, by having this placement of the Sun in Gemini also gives much strength to his Mercury (the planet of communication) which is also in Gemini (more on this later).

Shaw: “What do people usually do during dates?”

MC: “Uh, it’s usually eating, shopping and watching movies.”

Shaw: “That’s too boring, isn’t it? Since it’s a date with you, I’d like to get your feedback. What would you like to do?”

MC: “Nothing else.”

Shaw: “Then, what do you want to do?”

He thought for a couple of seconds and raised his eyebrows slowly, with a hint of glimmer of dark light in his eyes.

“You'll agree to anything that I do…?” -One Day Date

MC: “Why did you suddenly take an interest in reading?”

Shaw: “For the final exam.”

Despite his concentration, he flipped the pages with incredible speed- it seemed as if he didn't like what he read. -Summer Night Birthday Date

Shaw values all forms of communication and self-expression, whether it would be through music, writing, and teaching others about ancient relics. Additionally, it appears that he enjoys a range of hobbies, such as playing the bass, skateboarding and spray-painting, due to his interest in the wide variety of passions he developed. MC notices this on one of her earliest dates with him.

MC: “Hey, you seem to have a wide range of hobbies.” -One Day Date

Moon ☾ The Moon in our charts shows what your home is like, your upbringing, the relationship between your mother, the unconscious, your instincts and what you need. It tells us a lot about a person’s emotions, how they deal with it and how they express it to others.

Shaw's Moon is in Capricorn ♑︎ Productivity, work, and feeling useful and respected are the basic need for Lunar Caps. They like to keep their emotions in check, as they want to maintain being the cool-headed, practical and steady person of any group and in any project. Moon in Capricorn suggests that they have clear boundaries and realistic kinds of goals, looking for reassurance and security in what they do. They value and respect tradition and all things tangible and real. Moon Caps look forward to working towards their distant future goals, planning one step at a time. When feeling moody, their emotions will emphasise the pressure they had already put on themselves. Additionally, this is why letting their guard down to be comforted and to be reminded that they are not alone is very beneficial. Capricorns are unwilling to stand down, especially when it comes to emotionally “letting go”, hiding their sensitivity under a sarcastic manner. Wherever Capricorn is found in the chart, there is a desire for control, structure, and organisation. Emotions are well dealt with and handled in an efficient and practical manner.

There is a certain mysteriousness and sadness behind Shaw that can be subtly detected and yet to further explore deeply. This might have come from past trauma, possibly related to family relations. He has realistic expectations and justifications for his emotions, and when it comes to his goals, he will utilise these to help him slowly achieve them. Shaw is slowly letting his guard around MC, and gradually allowing him to love.

MC: “How can you draw so well?” I murmured quietly, envying his skills which require much talent.

Shaw: “Is it good? In a few months, it will fade into obscure and worthless trash."

He glanced at the wall with an undisguised contempt, as if it was not his own work that he was judging.

“It’s a failure.” He shook a spray can and started spraying it on the wall.

MC: “Wait! Why are you doing this?”

Shaw did not avert his eyes, and stood with his arms folded, refusing to give in.

Shaw: “But it's flawed now.” -One-Day Date

After a few seconds of silence, he frowned and put everything in his arms back on the table except for a can of coke. “Don’t act like you know me so well.” -Exciting Moments Date

Perhaps it was because I didn't believe that Shaw would appear so calm or so still, or because I wanted to explore why he looked so focused, I also looked at him in silence.

Shaw: “You really like to immerse yourself in your past.”

MC: “Find strength through the memories, then grow and become stronger.” I suddenly recalled a line from a TV series, and read it out.

A flicker of doubt flashed through his eyes, and eventually condensed into a dismissive look.

Shaw: “Who told you that we can only become stronger with memories?”

MC: “Why are you so dismissive?”

Speaking of which, what made Shaw so strong if it’s not finding strength from his “memory” or “past”?

Shaw: Why are you telling me this? Reminiscing every day means you’re getting old.”

-

Rain started to shower from the gloomy sky. I looked up, and found that the dark clouds were only above this small area of filming location. It was actually very sunny over at the antique market.

Fortunately, the rain was not heavy, and was even getting lighter as he predicted. He pulled at his hair, shaking off the scattering beads of rain. Such serenity did not match my impression of him, yet it was unexpectedly harmonious and natural.

MC: “Are you the rain god? Why does it always rain when I'm out with you?”

Shaw: “It’s because I can control the weather.”

At this point, the rain, which had stopped just a short while, suddenly fell again, but more densely. The smirk on his face was not gone yet. The rain seemed to be getting heavier. I felt more saddened as he spoke, yet Shaw just laughed. -Seeking Date

As a Capricorn Moon, his value and respect for tradition, and in all things tangible is very much obvious, and is highlighted with his display of knowledge about historic relics in Loveland’s museum shown in various dates, being the only student in the Department of Archeology of in Loveland University, as well in this scene from Season 2 that I couldn’t bear to leave out.

Mercury ☿ Mercury is the communication planet. When you write, speak, absorb information and how rational we are, you’re using your Mercury. It refines our Sun sign and helps define how we take in and give out information. It also talks about short distance travelling, governing your thirst for knowledge, your wit and negotiating skills. If someone is an excellent talker, it’s thanks to their Mercury placements.

Shaw's Mercury in Gemini ♊︎ Since Mercury is already ruled by Gemini, which makes it a favourable placement for quick-witted communication. Gemini Mercury placements may come across as being scattered and restless, but this is because of their different interests, seemingly knowing a little bit about everything. They easily gain knowledge where all sorts of facts and figures are up their alley, however generally have too many interests to deeply delve all into one. They can thrive in a stimulating environment as they are fast adapters who effortlessly learn and multitask at lightning speed.

This overlaps with Shaw’s Gemini Sun Placement. He may confuse MC sometimes with his personality and wit, but it’s nice to see MC adapt to it as well, because they have a lot to learn and grow from each other. He encourages MC to live life more boldly, while she teaches him to take things slower and be more aware of how his emotions and thoughts should work in harmony under special circumstances.

“He has no problem with the noise from rehearsals, and yet he can't stop criticising me for being noisy. He gets easily bored by things and yet he never gets tired on aimless strolls. Moreover, he always disagrees with me…” -Exciting Moment Date

MC: “Are you doing something illegal?”

Shaw: “What do you think?” Shaw looked at me playfully, and I could not help taking a step back vigilantly.

MC: “I'm a good law-abiding citizen and I won't be your accomplice!”

Shaw: “That's not up to you.”

-

MC: “Oh no! What should we do, what if we get caught!”

Shaw: “Nothing. Having a date at the police station should be a good experience.” -One-Day Date

Additionally, those reoccurring moments when he says that he had changed his mind also stems from the “twinning” aspect of Gemini in his thought process.

Shaw: “Give the cake and forks to me.”

MC: “Didn’t you say you didn’t want it?”

Shaw: “I changed my mind.” -Exciting Moments Date

Venus ♀︎ The planet Venus is ultimately the planet of love, beauty, wealth, our material things and what we do with all that sort of jazz. It’s the pleasures, our sentiments, what we do for leisure and what we value. Grace, charm, creativity, and entertainment are ruled by Venus. We can use this planet to see how we approach relationships of the heart, investigate our ability to attract and the attraction to others (or things).

Shaw's Venus is in Cancer ♋︎ These kinds of people are quite sensitive and insecure when it comes to love, with egos perhaps said to be a little bit undeveloped but have so much love, comfort, security, and care to offer. These aspects are emphasised for Cancers, who pay more attention to your feelings rather than said words. All they want is a safe, solid and secure relationship. They can be moody when it comes to love, though they are not afraid of emotional confrontations and to put their emotions on display when feeling it’s safe.

But once they are hurt, they will have a hard time forgiving. Pleasing them will involve a lot of sentimentality, as recognising their influences and attachments are from the family and home. When fearful of being rejected, they can resort to some frustrating tactics to find out how loved they are. Venus Cancers will want to be cared for, and in return their partner will be rewarded with a loving, dependable and patient lover.

Shaw puts up a front with his teasing and seemingly lack of interest to attend events with MC, though we can tell that he’s a very thoughtful and intuitive lover. Once he has allowed himself to internally address his feelings, he will use straightforward methods in how he communicates it to MC, again, strengthened by his Gemini placements. Additionally, Cancers will cling onto something or someone that is of value to them, because it evokes memories and emotions. In the same sense, if there is someone that Shaw has his eye on, he will inch closer to them, and will be unwilling to give them up once he has them.

I tried to reach out and pull him down while watching out for him, but he just took me by surprise and grabbed my hand instead. I quickly pressed down my skirt with the other hand. Probably realising something, his amber eyes widened slightly, then let go of me, with a low “tsk”. -Seeking Date

Shaw: “Why can’t you let that go?”

MC: Because I'm sick of you treating me like this. One time, you waited for me to get to the Live House to tell me that there was a change in venue, and there was also this one time when you- achoo!”

I pulled my jacket tighter around myself. Suddenly there was a rustle above my head and I found myself covered in a warm coat. Shaw stood up without a word as if he didn't hear me. Clad in a white shirt, he looked at once familiar and strange from behind.

Then I noticed his hand in the pocket. I was expecting him to conjure something for me like he did last time with the Dragonfly Eye. Before I could react, Shaw suddenly grabbed me by hand. With no gloves on, he tightly wrapped his slender fingers around my palm. I felt an unexpectedly soft and warm sensation.

MC: “Let go of me!”

Shaw: “No, I don’t want to.”

-

Shaw: “You've been asking questions about me all day. Do you really want to get to know me? Bring your ear closer. I can tell you all about myself.”

-Exciting Moments Date

His hand flew past my face and landed on the back of my head. With a slight jerk, he pulled me toward him. Our foreheads were then pressed together, and I felt the warmth of his forehead resting on mine, my breath on my skin, his unintentional touch, and his body pressed against mine. -Summer Night Birthday Date

“Do you like me? Yes or no?” -Unanswered Phone Call

Mars ♂︎ Mars is the go-getter planet. Full of fire and passion, nothing would be done without it. It can give insights on how we can chase our goals and what our desires and our plans of attack are. Aggressive behaviour, lust and anger fall under this planet.

Shaw's Mars is in Libra ♎︎ Mars Libras often reflect about the things they do before they act, needing to weigh out all the decisions first. They also can get easily caught up in defending themselves and others, as well as charming others to win others’ favour if needed. They wish to not be disturbed in their life or how they “operate”, going about with the desire to balance everything, with almost having a seemingly passive-aggressive approach to situations. Mars Libras know when to compromise and manage conflict, as well as predicting problems and discord well in advance. Libras will question themselves on how they can make the playing field more fair, intervening when necessary and when things aren’t. Shaw demonstrates this during his bus stop intervention when he first meets MC, on his dates with her, as well as his confrontation with Gavin.

“Don’t hesitate if you have already thought it through.”

-

MC: “What’s the matter?”

Shaw shrugged, lifted the corner of his lip, and looked at me, saying this firmly word by word.

Shaw: “Don’t forget that this is our punishment. Be a good loser.” -One-Day Date

“What are you laughing at? Stop it.” he reached out his hand, trying to mess up my hair. I quickly dodged backward and started laughing harder.

“Hey.”

A stunned look flashed Shaw’s eyes. Before he finished his sentence, I slipped and fell heavily backwards. He looked at me before a hint of schadenfreude appeared in his eyes. Then he said in a raised tone, “that's what you get for laughing too hard.”

He then sat down with me. I turned to him in confusion.

MC: “Why did you sit down when you’re supposed to help me up?”

Shaw: “Because I wanted to.” -Exciting Moments Date

Brutal gales whipped up gravel and rocked trees. A bolt of lightning split the sly, illuminating the two people locked in a standoff.

Gavin’s face was completely devoid of its former calm, and in its place was wrath. The man opposite Gavin squinted his eyes ever so slightly. He went wild with laughter, and an arrogant expression swept back over his face.

Shaw: “Well, we’re finally starting to get serious. It’s about time.”

Gavin: “I warned you! She’s off-limits.”

Shaw: “Are you threatening me?”

Gavin: “You aren’t worthy.”

The man lifted his eyebrow and slowed his speech purposefully.

Shaw: “Anyway, my objective has been reached. I don’t mind toying with you. But I don't know how long this girl you’re obsessed with has long to live...”

The two fought with increasing ferocity. The man was slowly losing ground. Then, the sky roared, and a white flame connected heaven and earth. The man was gone without a trace. -Chapter 11-24

Jupiter ♃ Jupiter is the largest planet, a gas giant, known to expand as the “benefactor” of our solar system. Everything it touches is basically blessed. It’s the good luck, confidence, joy, freedom and adventure that it gives to one’s being that it’s so well known for. Jupiter is where you seize your opportunities, take a leap of faith and count your blessings.

Shaw’s Jupiter is in Aquarius ♒︎ Shaw attracts the most good fortune when he’s tolerant and fair, cooperative and inventive, being different from society’s norms and standards. He values technology, people and personal freedom the most, desiring to display his unique skills and talents. He is open to new methods and eccentric ways to progress. We see this as he’s willing to share his knowledge with others, shown in the CN Creative Date and Summer Solstice Date, and when Shaw offers a hand to help MC by making her alias “Mary Sue” to help her successfully break into STF in later chapters. He also shows her the electricity firework he makes with his Evol, which fascinates MC enough for her to reach out and touch it.

I looked at Shaw's on the other side of the wall. The flaunting design was imposing, as if it was about to jump out at me the next second. Then I looked at my grinning rabbit, which seemed to be the clumsy work of a child.

-

In the gold and purple pattern, “SHAW” could be faintly recognised while a grinning rabbit stood at the top of the world. They actually seemed… quite in harmony? -One-Day Date

MC: “Is that the same MP4 player you had on the bus?”

Shaw: “Yes, someone gifted it to me a long time ago.” Emboldened by his straightforwardness, I couldn't help but move slower. -Exciting Moments Date

Floating on his palm was a sizzling firework giving off dazzling sparks. I was stunned by the sight. I couldn’t believe that Evol could do that. I reached out to touch it, but Shaw stopped me.

“Are you out of your mind? It’s charged with electricity.” -Summer Night Birthday Date

Saturn ♄ Saturn is the planet of karma, restrictions, life lessons, hard facts and the challenges in life. It governs structure, our fears, work and self-discipline. Saturn is cold and calculating, however once the challenges and lessons Saturn have been mastered, great wisdom with great rewards can be obtained.

Shaw's Saturn is in Aries ♈︎ Aries Saturns are highly resourceful coming up with fresh ideas for our goals. They don’t like showing weakness and need to be careful when limiting themselves due to fear of failure or making a poor decision. They’re very self- reliant because they rarely ask for help. They need to be shown that not “being first” is okay.

It’s proven that Shaw has a competitive side to him, seen in the CN Summer Solstice Date and his Rumours and Secrets, where Shaw refuses to give up and ends up doing dolphin flips on his skateboard in a match against a senior and wins after his first loss. In Accompanying Date, he acknowledges his embarrassing moments when he got caught skipping class, then reflects on them. We also see this as he flees his battle with Gavin when he almost loses.

Shaw: "I just remember winning. Don’t people at ten years old want to get swept away, win against everyone, and leave them far behind?" -CN Summer Solstice Date

Shaw: "The fence of the school was disagreed with by the elementary students. Back then, my skills weren’t refined yet. I got discovered by a teacher when I fell from it." While reminiscing, Shaw pouts unhappily. -CN Accompanying Date

The two fought with increasing ferocity. The man was slowly losing ground. Then, the sky roared, and a white flame connected heaven and earth. The man was gone without a trace. -Chapter 11-24

Uranus ♅ Wherever Uranus is in the chart, it’s where we want to break free, where we want to do things our own way, when you don’t care what everyone else is doing or thinking about. It’s where we express our ideals on freedom, innovation and experience great epiphanies. We strive for independence with the influence of the Uranus character. As a result, we learn to rebel, break traditions and authority. It shakes things up from our past and into the modern future. It is often associated with unpredictability, chaos and anarchy.

Shaw's Uranus is in Aquarius ♒︎ These people are interested in innovating, changing and updating traditions related to technology, community and individuality. They see freedom through or in these areas, and are ready to rebel if needed. Aquarius Uranus people are open to new ideas and free thought.

Shaw is no stranger to the concept of rebellion. He sneaks into places he shouldn’t be in, spray-paints graffiti, and helps MC access top-secret information in STF. His comments on history further outlines the unique outlook that he challenges with traditional views.

I looked around nervously, remembering that last time, we were chased by city police for street graffiti.

Shaw: “Don’t you want to come? Hurry up.”

MC: “Do you just do anything you like? Do you abide by no rules?” -One-Day Date

Shaw: “What do you think history is?” Student: Those historical relics you told us about just then!”

- Student: “If everything is history, how does one learn it?” Shaw: “There’s no need for an intention. It’s everywhere.” -CN Summer Solstice Date

Neptune ♆ Neptune is the inspirational planet of dreams, inspirations, soulmates, enlightenment and sacrifice. It’s all about connection with the universe and the world around you, however can have the polar effect of deception and illusion, along with disappearances of sorts. It can also govern your music tastes and influence on how you can inspire others.

Shaw’s Neptune is in Capricorn ♑︎ With this placement, his idealistic world will be based around realism, morality, and responsibility. He has to believe in the ground foundations of realisability of his dreams- enough so that it usually has a realistic thread about them. General optimism and faith will be lacking if he’s not doing something that he is passionate about and finds inspiration in. However, he has the capacity to change his practical dreams into reality the most. His influences and contributions come from his connection with Dark/MC, again with Mars in Libra, and is seen as a guide and spectator, though less passive than a Time Observer. It’s also clear that Shaw cares a lot for his music and his band. He even recognises a plagiarised song in one of his Rumours and Secrets.

“Playing with the band is just a hobby, so Shaw rarely creates something from scratch. He must have hidden things he wanted to say in his music, but never mentioned it to anyone.” -Summer Night birthday Date

Shaw: "No wonder these people didn’t realise it, they copied an unpopular song from the 80s. You should also improve your musical literacy so you wouldn’t be confused by these things." -CN Glacier Navigation Rumours and Secrets

My phone started buzzing in my outer coat pocket. I took it out and saw an unfamiliar number. A few moments of hesitation, I answered it. An unfamiliar voice came from the other end.

“Long time, no see. I’m sure you’re trying to guess who I am right now.” There was something in his voice that gave me a sense of déjà vu.

MC: “May I ask, what this is about?”

“I can’t just call you for no reason? Everyone has already forgotten you. You are officially someone who shouldn’t exist in this world.

MC: “Impossible! Just who are you, anyway?”

“Go see for yourself. For instance, at the place where it all started.” -Chapter 19-1

Outside the floor to ceiling window, a tall man with light purple hair was looking at me in the eye, an unmistakable smile on his lips. Who is this person? He waved at me and strove in the diner.

“Oh, here you are.” He greeted me with such familiarity, a few loose strands of hair fell over his forehead, softening his sharp eyes. His actions were swift and sure, giving me no time to interrupt. His face seemed so familiar but I can’t remember where I’ve seen it before.

MC: “Who are you?”

Hearing this, the young man’s brow raised, and the look of amusement flashed over his eyes.

“You don’t remember? You bumped my skateboard.”

MC: “Oh! We met on the bus. But how is it that you remember me?”

He didn’t answer me straight away. He just observed my expression with great interest, seemingly enjoying watching my reaction.

“I’m the one who called you. It’s me. The dream world has no effect on me.”

Pluto ♇ Pluto is the Lord of the Underworld, and is not to be messed around with. It’s responsible for great destructible transformations and corresponds to the life, death and rebirth cycle. It’s the detoxing planet, for you to awaken and be reborn. It shows us where we can change the world, alongside right where we can go into the abyss of the cunning and controlling energies of Pluto. Its powers can be ever so subtle, however it can have the forces to trash you with the realisations of what you need to let go in order to transform. Think of it as the “healing crisis” moments that you can thank Pluto for.

Shaw's Pluto is in Sagittarius ♐︎ They take beliefs and philosophy of life very seriously, more than most. They believe deeply in personal freedom and expression, questioning ideologies in place. They often watch for a tendency to move from one project to another, perhaps due to inhuman expectations. They are motivated and driven by the vision of a better world, therefore their faith in humanity is strong.

Shaw helps MC multiple times when she is in need, additionally supporting her beliefs and vision to save the world and everyone in it, like when she first entered the Winter World and helped her rescue the kidnapped children against her battle with Leto in the Chapter 34. He even gives her his necklace- the Dragonfly Eye in the end of Season 1 and wishes her well once they meet again.

Shaw: “Oh yeah, the other you is really funny. Today, she saved someone on the street. Did you use to do stuff like that too?”

Dark MC: “I’m not like her. I don’t do meaningless things like that. Stick to the plan.”

Shaw: “Oh? I’d thought you’d like this scene. What are you planning to do, anyway?”

Dark MC: “Why of course, I’m going to accept my place as QUEEN.” -Behind the Curtain Chapter 5

MC: “Shaw, what are you doing here? Where’s Leto?”

Another thunder flashes, Shaw’s face was reflected clearly and I saw him lift his eyebrow slightly.

Shaw: “You are so slow. Did you bring the notebook? Keep it and give it to me later.”

MC: “You haven’t answered why you are here.”

Shaw: “And I thought you were starting to get smarter. None of us can stay out of it now. If I don’t intervene, this world is finished.”

I would love to see more about Shaw’s background character and his upbringing as to why he had appeared a bit defensive in some dates. Poor Shaw :( Hopefully this study allowed you all to gain a deeper understanding of Shaw and his character, and to why he’s important in the main storyline and other events alike.

[trespeak]

What's your favorite house album?

Wow, that’s a toughie. Might just have to give you a list instead.

This ended up being pretty long so I’ve put all the big descriptions I wrote for each of ‘em under the cut, but here’s the gist:

Daft Punk, Discovery (2001)

Kaskade, Fire and Ice (2011)

deadmau5, For Lack of a Better Name (2009) and 4x4=12 (2010)

Phantoms, Phantoms (2017)

Justice, † (2007) 

Lazy Rich’s singles

Porter Robinson/Virtual Self – Spitfire (2011) and Virtual Self (2017)

I like a lot of deep house and electro house, so most of my picks here are within either or both of those subgenres (as well as progressive house, in deadmau5′s case).

For more of my thoughts (and there are many!), see below.

Daft Punk, Discovery (2001)

Accept no substitutes. For Guy-Manuel de Homem Christo and Thomas Bangalter, making quality tunes seems to just be second nature. Their second album replaces the underground, city-street feel of Homework with a shiny, discotheque-ready sound that stands on the shoulders of giants but does so as a means of updating and widening the reach of their own influences (with “Harder Better Faster Stronger”’s use of “Cola Bottle Baby” as a perfect example thereof). My favorite track on the record, “Digital Love,” perhaps only barely qualifies as house, but between the earnestness of the vocoded lyrics and the heart-stopper of a guitar solo, I don’t even mind – who cares about genre conventions when you’re a smitten robot? It’s utterly brilliant and its era exists as the gold standard for many DP fans, myself included among them.

Kaskade, Fire and Ice (2011)

Ryan Raddon’s seventh album and the one I hold the most nostalgia for. An ambitious effort on Kaskade’s part, Fire and Ice is a double album, with original tracks on one side and remixed, chilled-out versions of the same songs on the other (geddit?). The ICE mixes are something of a mixed bag, with some having more reason to exist than others, but the Fire side of the album earns it a place here on its own, with Skrillex and Raddon giving us their own brilliant take on a classic track from Guy Manuel de Homem Christo on “Lick It,” as well as the smooth vibes of Ryan’s collaboration with his band Late Night Alumni and Inpetto on “How Long.” Another standout track: “ICE,” a big, bumping jam Ryan made with Dan Black and Dada Life.

deadmau5, For Lack of a Better Name (2009) and 4x4=12 (2010)

Oh, Joel. These days he’s earned a controversial status as full-time internet troll alongside his career as a musician, but he’s still had a palpable impact on the industry at large (pop juggernaut Marshmello more or less owes his entire career to the allure of the man in the cute mask, and while Daft Punk did it first, Mello’s own interpretation is particularly and explicitly influenced by the way deadmau5 did it). These two albums dropped when I was twelve/thirteen and still opening my eyes to the wide world of electronica, and I think they’re particularly significant as the point where I went from being a casual fan of it to a devotee, sparking an investment in the Scene® that I still have to this day. The degree of control Joel flexes over his work at its peak was unprecedented for the time and still holds up now – “Strobe,” the album closer on For Lack Of, is particularly notable in how it makes ten minutes feel like no time at all in how it builds and shifts with just a few simple, powerful elements in play at a time. “Ghosts ‘n Stuff” earned Joel and vocalist Rob Swire a crossover hit, and “Raise Your Weapon” stands as an early illustration of what the North American take on dubstep would sound like in the years to come. 

Phantoms, Phantoms (2017)

Kyle Kaplan and Vinnie Pergola’s debut record is a clever mission statement for their work. Their deep house tunes are infused with pop sensibilities, placing them in company with contemporaries like Jamie xx and Disclosure as house DJs making an effort to bridge the gap between the radio airwaves and the dance floor. My favorites include “Just a Feeling” with Verite, a modody track called “Downtown,” and the utterly brilliant “Need You Closer,” a collab with Hayley Kiyoko that easily converted me into the Church of Lesbian Jesus. (Their recent work is also worth a nod as well – they’ve been building up singles to drum up interest in a new EP, including one of their best tracks to date, a driving progressive house tune called “Designs for You.”)

Justice, † (2007)

Gaspard Auge and Xavier de Rosnay’s debut record remains their best. There’s so many iconic tracks on this one: The slick vibes of “Genesis” and “Newjack,” the ever crowd-pleasing “D.A.N.C.E.,” the pumping “Phantom” and its sequel, the nu-disco sleaze of “DVNO”, and the ear-splitting delight of “Waters of Nazareth.” The record earned them a positive, if daunting, comparison to fellow French house pioneers Daft Punk, and while their work on it shares an obsession with taking diverse samples and reconfiguring them into their own image, Justice’s fascination with the macabre aesthetic of 70′s horror films and the rock ‘n roll ethos of T. Rex earned them a distinct spot in the pantheon of electronic acts with this record (as well as its followup, the different-but-still-great Audio, Video, Disco).

Feed Me - Feed Me’s Big Adventure (2011) and Calamari Tuesday (2013)

Jon Gooch was one of the earliest musicians to emerge under deadmau5′s mau5trap label, and still shines as one of its leading acts today (High Street Creeps, released earlier this year, has jams for days). While he started his career making drum ‘n bass tracks as Spor, the bulk of his work since 2009 has been under the Feed Me alias, where he’s dabbled in all manner of electronic but mostly hews close to the realm of electro house. Gooch’s experience in making complex tunes meant that Feed Me came out swinging, with tracks like “Grand Theft Ecstasy” and “Muscle Rollers” exhibiting a confidence and technical skill from the outset that most producers would kill for on their first record. By the time his first proper full length released two years later, he’d developed a consistent feel that made collaborations with indie bands (”Love Is All I Got,” with Crystal Fighters) and soulful singers (”Last Requests,” with Jenna G) feel as natural as hard-hitting bangers (”No Grip” and “Death by Robot”). Mix in a little bit of both and you get “Ophelia,” a anthemic ballad made with YADi – my favorite song from the record, and a earworm that still sticks with me six years on. Love, don’t let me drown…

and some honorable mentions!

Lazy Rich’s singles! Richard Billis is a Canadian DJ who retired from producing tunes in 2017, but for the decade or so he was releasing music, the electro house singles he released were nothing short of iconic. Songs like “Blast Off” (with Hirshee and Lizzie Curious) and “Flash” (with Hot Mouth) are energetic, breezy and danceable. There’s nothing quite like a good Lazy Rich drop; his beats hit the dance floor with the weight of a truck, and have a sonic diversity among them that would predict the electronic scene’s shift toward the dynamism of future bass. It makes me sad that we won’t get any more of them, but Billis left behind such an evergreen catalog of singles that it’s hard to be down for very long. (I used to use his remix of Zedd’s “Stars Come Out” as a theme song of sorts on an old website where you could be a DJ with your friends. The fond memories are strong with this one.)

Porter Robinson/Virtual Self – Spitfire (2011) and Virtual Self (2017) – Leave it to Porter Robinson to carve out a completely separate musical persona just to hearken back to his halcyon days as a young producer. My initial introduction to him was just after he’d emerged from the hands-up scene, while he had his eyes set on stardom through what he called “complextro,” and it was surprising to find that his work not only lived up to its genre classification but actively carved out a market for its sound, even before Porter had dropped an album. If the dubstep and house feel of Spitfire was a revelation, the DDR vibes of the Virtual Self EP are a revitalization; similar in ethos, but with an owned, Serial Experiments Lain-styled technological aesthetic. Porter does a lot of work to keep the two projects separate (even going as far as to delineate live shows between the aliases), but rather than fragmenting his work the distinction only ends up strengthening his catalog, in much the same way Jon Gooch’s work as Feed Me complements his earlier collection as Spor.

JOYRYDE’s singles and upcoming album - John Ford Jr. is an English DJ who knows what he likes: fast cars, bumping house beats, mean-muggin’ rap jams, and making tunes that blend all of the above in one way or another. His JOYRYDE project is only a few years old, emerging in 2016, but it’s very much the culmination of years of diggin’ in the crates and building a sound that blends the hip-hop influences of trap with the boogie-bounce sensibility of house. No sooner is this evident than the “parental discretion is advised” warning (and subsequent punchy opening bars) that welcomes you into “HOT DRUM,” though his other tracks (including “MAXIMUM KING” and the Rick Ross-assisted “WINDOWS”) share that kinetic energy. He’s one to watch!

Also worth your time:

Oliver’s Mechanical EP and their album Full Circle

Mord Fustang’s All Eyes On… compilations

Botnek’s singles from 2016 onward

Chris Lake’s releases with his label Black Book Records

Self Help by Walker and Royce

pretty much everything by Ellie Herring and Chrissy (Murderbot)

Fantasmas by Zavala

anything Wolfgang Gartner has made (particularly his early 2010s singles)

That’s all I got for now. If you made it this far, you’re an angel. Thanks for indulging me :)

[theconnoisseurreviews]

Day 10: Your Favorite Director

Day 10 already, WOW! Feels like I just started this and now we’re almost a 3rd of the way complete. 

There are so many great DIrectors out there that I love. From relatively new ones like Ryan Cooglar and Damien Chazelle to classics like Martin Scorsese and Ridley Scott to inbetweeners like David Fincher and Brad Bird to actors turned Directors like my favorites Mel Gibson and Ben Affleck, there are some amazing Directors out there. However, for me there was only one real choice.

He’s a master class Director and is regarded as one of, if not the greatest of all time. An argument can be made that he’s never made a bad movie. So, if you haven’t guessed, it’s the most cliche and predictable choice out there. My favorite Director of all time is the one and only great Steven Spielberg.

I can’t think of any one Director that has done it all. Spielberg has done everything from Drama to Comedy to Historical to Animated to Fantasy to Family and he has done them so extremely well. And the amazing part is that regardless, if he’s doing a serious drama or a whimsical family movie, the films have his signature touch and heart. Not many Directors can have their signature touch in movies as they change genres or even be able to do anything aside from the one type of movies they’re accustomed to doing, but Spielberg does it so seamlessly. 

My earliest memory of his movies was watching is masterpiece “Schindler’s List,” which I consider to be the greatest movie ever made, I was hooked to his style and sensibility. His eye for detail, the dynamic and moving score, the performances he gets from his entire cast, his absorbing camera work, and the emotional power of the film was almost immediate for me. And he brings the exact same brilliance in all of his movie regardless of how big or small. 

From my first experience, I began to religiously watch all of his films, there are still some I have not seen yet. And almost none of his movies disappoint. THe only time they could be considered a disappointment is only among his own filmography because I don’t think any Director can always out due themselves. Plus, he respects animation and that makes my respect for him even greater as I am a huge advocate for animated films to be given more respect and taken seriously.

I’ve already talked about how much I love “The B.F.G” and how Spielberg managed to bring so much heart and magic of cinema in every frame. And he does the same with “E.T.” the underrated, but magnificent “War Horse” and “Hook.” He’s even made genre defining movies like the blockbuster trendsetters “Jaw,” and Jurassic Park” or the adventurous and action packed Indiana Jones series and “The Adventure of Tintin.” While most of his movies are family friendly or fun, he can turn the knob and make darker movies that handle even more tougher subject matter like “The Color Purple” and “Amistad” or historical epics like “Saving Private Ryan” and “Lincoln.” Like I’ve said he can do anything and he does everything extremely well. Any Director would be lucky to have made half of these classics let alone so many and so consistently. 

A Spielberg movie is an event and whenever he announces a new film, I have to mark my calendar and make sure to catch it in theaters. I’m usually confident that I’m either going to be left in awe or have an extremely fun time regardless of what I’m watching from him. I’m also sure that he’s gonna get Oscar recognition. I’m already stoked for “The Papers,” coming later this year, and “Ready Player One,” coming in early 2018. 

I could go on and on about how great and influential Spielberg has been and probably will be, but I don’t think I could do him justice. Just know that he’s my favorite Director and I don’t think it’s gonna change in my lifetime. He can capture the reality and struggles of the human condition, but also make you feel like a child watching a movie for the first time. He has a sense of magic that is indescribable. Some Directors can manage to infuse their films with this “movie magic,” but Spielberg has it present in every single one of his movies and that’s what makes his movies unique and able to stand the test of time. It doesn’t matter which movie you consider his best, there really is no wrong answer. All of his movies are great and he is the best of all time.

What are your thoughts on this legendary Director?

[passionsarabia]

The Quttainah Medical Center has earned a reputation as one of the key players in the Cosmetic Medicine and Surgery market sector in Kuwait and the region. QMC provides the highest standards of medical services, the center is fully fledged with the latest technologies, advanced techniques, specialized and skilled team to assure the best cosmetic and reconstructive results. It was established and is run by a remarkable man – Dr. Adel Quttainah.

Facilities such as the QMC don’t create themselves, and behind them lays a story of passion and commitment. We learned more from Dr. Adel himself… 

What is the extent of services offered at the QMC? 

We started initially to be the Middle East’s largest center for aesthetic medicine. Today, however, we’re covering a much broader range. QMC consists of four state of the art operating theaters, exclusive inpatients suites, services include Cosmetic Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery, Dermatology, ENT (Facial Plastic Surgery), Skin Care and Laser Department, Bariatric and General Surgery, Cosmetic Dental Surgery, Non- Surgical weight loss Department, Gynecology and Infertility-IVF Clinic, LVR (Cosmetic Gynecology Clinic), Complete Breast Care Clinic, Hair Transplantation, Oasis IV Hydration Clinic as well as many other services and disciplines. 

Why did you choose cosmetic surgery as a career? 

Simply, because I didn’t want to do anything else. I didn’t want to specialise in a specific area of surgery, and this is the only speciality that covers all ages and both genders. There’s always something new, a fresh challenge and a solution to be found. 

What is the most challenging aspect of your role in Kuwait and the region? 

Like any other business, you have to be consistent. that’s the challenge. In our sector, the highest quality is always the supreme goal. Happy patients bring happy patients. 

What’s the secret behind your success? What are your values and ambitions? 

There’s no secret – it’s all just pure hard work. I’m still working 100 hours a week – it’s what’s required if we’re going to maintain ourselves as the best. My ambitions are to open similar centers in Gulf states – but I’ll only do this when I can guarantee carrying forward our strong work ethics and rigid discipline to new locations. 

How big a role does technology play in the development of surgical and cosmetic techniques? Where are the biggest strides being taken in this regard? 

In plastic and cosmetic surgery – other than perhaps in dermatology with its laser machines – technology doesn’t play as significant a role as people might think. You can’t tell a robot to ‘fix this nose.’ The surgeon’s skill is always the prime technology in this sector. A good plastic surgeon is the key. 

Work / Life Balance 

You’re a busy man. How do you juggle the work / life balance? How do you manage to find time for family and other passions? 

To be honest, I don’t manage it all that well, other than at weekends or when we travel. 

When you’re away from QMC, do you find it easy to disconnect from work altogether? 

Not totally. Although my specialty is more comfortable to move away from because I’m unlikely to be called on an emergency, I never disconnect altogether. 

Freetime 

We know you’re a passionate car enthusiast, and a McLaren aficionado in particular. What is it about Woking’s finest that attracted you in the first place? 

A friend tried to get me interested in McLarens, but to me, it was a racing car marque, that was all. Everything changed though when I got into one. The experience changed my view of English automotives. 

Here was a stable, responsive and practical supercar – and one that can be driven every day. McLaren’s attention to detail – and luxury touches – make it perfect for me. 

What is it about fast cars that fascinates you? 

You might be surprised to learn it’s not just the speed… it’s the whole package. All cars are fast these days. A car’s aerodynamics and aesthetics interest me more than pure speed. 

I like to know what’s under the hood and appreciate the technology. For me, McLaren are the best in this regard – getting so much out of a tightly packaged engine. 

What would be your ideal car? 

The 720S. 

What else fills your time away from surgery? 

I have a museum – the first and only medical museum in Kuwait. I’ve collected around 400 pieces over the past 25 years. It’s a passion of mine. Whenever I travel, you’ll find me searching antique markets around the world for additional pieces. I also use the internet to search for unique pieces. I have an old wooden stethoscope that took a year to find. 

On The Cover: Men’s Passion’s February 2019 issue

QUICK-FIRE Q&A

• When were you happiest? When I got results of my medical fellowship exams. I’d worked hard. 

• What is your greatest fear? God. I try to do the right thing. I’ll have to wait to see what he thinks.

• What is your earliest memory? With my mother at a juice place on Salem Mubarak Street. I remember her car, a Mercedes, and just how scorching the day was.

• What is your most treasured possession?

My family.

• What is the trait you most admire in yourself? Integrity.

• What is the trait you most admire in others? Loyalty.

• What would your super power be? I wish I could create ten more hours a day. Perhaps I could be SleeplessMan.

• Who would play you in the film of your life? Danny DeVito (never take yourself too seriously).

• What is your favourite word? Consistency.

• What is top of your bucket list? I don’t have one.

• What is your guiltiest pleasure? Food. I love food. But my metabolism is slowing more quickly than my appetite!

• What do you owe your parents? Everything.

• How do you relax? Travelling.

• What single thing would improve the quality of your life? Less work or more hours.

• What keeps you awake at night? Nothing. I hit the pillow and sleep.

• How would you like to be remembered? By my patients – as the guy that improved their lives. By my family and friends – as the guy that was always there for them. By others – just as a nice guy.

via Passions Arabia

[katjiekat]

Quest 8: Write Down 100 Questions. Boss 8: Finding 100 Questions That Are Not Mediocre. Status: Completed?

^Questioning Mind by Michael Alfano.

Questions for my reader, since you’ve been so loyal in reading this far.

Is this really what I’m going to write as my first question?

Am I doing this right?

Probably not, should I change them up a bit?

Yes, I think let’s go a bit of a more interesting route, what do you think, reader?

So this is what it’s like to “break the 4th wall,” are you scared now?

I’m just kidding, why not come along with me and explore some more questions?

I don’t think I’m allowed to google these things am I?

Well I did for this one and it’s pretty interesting so, what do you call the smell after it rains? (Answer: Petrichor).

Who invented the number 9?  (Wikipedia: “the origin of the 9 integers can be attributed to ancient Indian civilization, and was adopted by subsequent civilizations in conjunction with the 0.”) It’s actually rather interesting how the first ‘9′ integers looked, see the evolution of this integer in the first picture at the bottom of these questions.

Hey reader, can you understand Japanese?

Well, here’s a nice question for you anyway - “こんにちは、私の名前はジェスです。あなたの名前は何ですか？”

You didn’t understand that? Well, here’s how to say it according to Google Translate: “Kon'nichiwa, watashinonamaeha jesudesu. Anata no namae wa nanidesu ka?”

You still didn’t understand that? Well, sorry, you’ll have to look it up.

On a scale from 1-you can’t directly respond to me, how tired are you?

Are you as tired as I am?

What’s your usual bedtime?

Oh, that’s cool, mine’s similar. Doesn’t going to bed that late make you all groggy the next day? Well, it does for me. I don’t know how you do it.

When you are old, what do you think children will ask you to tell stories about? I once lay on a tester bed in the middle of a mall with my best friend and a creepy security guard with the biggest gap-tooth I’ve ever seen came up to us not to chase us away but rather to ask if he could join us... Obviously we said no and ran away.

What food have you never eaten but would really like to try?

What “old person” things do you do?  I like naps very very much.

What’s the spiciest thing you’ve ever eaten? Back in 2009, I went to India to help out a charity. While I was there, I was introduced to chapatis, milk straight from a cow and the hottest chilli I’ve ever eaten - I ate it whole.

What’s your cure for hiccups? I take a deep breath and then swallow, that usually does the trick. For about a minute anyway.

What’s your favourite weather? Mine is when it rains for the whole day and it’s kinda cold and I can just cuddle in bed with a movie and hot chocolate.

If you had to choose between eating a really nice soup with a fork and a really horrible soup with a spoon, which would you choose?

What do you usually do when you procrastinate?

Do you think that aliens exist?

Are you religious?

What movie quotes do you use on a regular basis?

If animals could talk, which animal would be the most annoying?

What’s the funniest comedy skit you’ve seen? All that needs to be said here is Monte Python or any mention of John Cleese for that matter.

What’s the funniest thing you’ve done or had happen while your mind was wandering? Unintentional awkward eye contact...

What was the best thing that happened to you today?

How do you make yourself sleep when you can’t seem to get to sleep?

What’s the opposite of a koala?

What’s the smartest thing you’ve seen an animal do? Cue the endless supply of videos on YouTube of dogs opening doors and fridges and parrots counting to 30.

What did you Google last?

What qualities do all your friends have in common?

Music recommendations?

What’s the nearest thing to your left?

What would be an accurate tag line for each month?

What’s the most embarrassing story from your childhood? When I was about 5 or so, I decided it would be an amazing idea to participate in a one-girl fashion show. My audience consisted of my step dad and his business partner that was probably there for a meeting. I cringe to this day as I remember how I waltzed around in my baby pink gown and little kitty cat slippers thinking I was the hippest chick ever.

How are you still reading this far?

I hope you’re not bored. Would you tell me if you are?

What’s fine in small numbers but terrifying in large numbers? Any kind of bug.

What did you believe for way too long as a child?

What’s your favorite holiday movie? The Nightmare Before Christmas <3

When was the last time you stayed up through the entire night? What is university?

What outdated slang do you use on a regular basis? Okidokie.

What happens regularly that would horrify a person from 100 years ago?

What questions would you like to ask a time traveler from 200 years in the future?

What awful movie do you love?

What’s the best sandwich you’ve ever had?

What’s the most annoying thing about the social media platform you use most often? I feel like there’s only one answer to this. And that’s ads.

What would be the most unsettling thing to keep occasionally finding around your house?

How much do you think names affect the outcomes of people’s lives?

What are some of the dumbest lyrics you’ve heard in a song? The ting goes skrrrahh, pap, pap, ka-ka-ka.

What word do you always mispronounce? The word “rant.”

What would be the worst food to be liquefied and drunk through a straw?

When was the last time you were hopelessly lost? We all know that “lost in a supermarket, can’t find mom” feeling.

What two films would you like to combine into one?

What’s the most boring super hero you can come up with? Subjectively, “Accounting Man.”

What word is a lot of fun to say? Just say the word “bubbles” a few times and tell me your answer.

If your five-year-old self suddenly found themselves inhabiting your current body, what would your five-year-old self do first? I used to dream of swimming in chocolate.

What is something that everyone looks stupid doing?

In 40 years what will people be nostalgic for? Somehow I’d imagine little touch screen phones will die out eventually.

What is the weirdest thing you have seen in someone else’s home? A decapitated doll hanging from a ceiling fan...

What set of items could you buy that would make the cashier the most uncomfortable?

What are the unwritten rules of where you work? It used to be “Your hours are 7-4 but your real hours are 6:30-whenever we say you can go.”

What is something that you just recently realized that you are embarrassed you didn’t realize earlier?

What’s the best type of cheese? Gouda, holloumi, feta, Parmesan...

What would be the worst “buy one get one free” sale of all time? A coffin.

What’s the weirdest thing a guest has done at your house?.

What mythical creature would improve the world most if it existed?

If peanut butter wasn’t called peanut butter, what would it be called?

If someone asked to be your apprentice and learn all that you know, what would you teach them?

If you see a puddle on the ground, do you walk around it or over it?

If you got to name a new country, how would you decide what to call it?

What would be the title of your memoir?

What do you give a damn about?

If you could have one 'do over' in your life, what would you do differently?

What is your earliest memory?

What do you miss about being a kid?

What’s something you want to do in the next year that you’ve never done before? I want to get two tattoos - one of a koi fish and another of a cat.

What makes you happy? Food, the special people in my life and naps.

What’s your ideal weekend?

What’s your favorite quote?

What do you want your legacy to be? I hope my work becomes significant in the art/design/writing world.

What was the first thing you bought with your own money? An icecream!  

How do you like to be comforted when you’re upset? Food, love and series.

What’s a favorite memory with a pet/animal?

What do you think your best physical feature is?

What scares you the most about the future?

Who was your favourite teacher in high school?

What’s your favourite colour?

Do you prefer mornings or evenings?

What is the best book ever written?

What’s something bad that’s happened to someone that you wish you could change?

Do you like mugs? I absolutely love collecting mugs.

Who is the most important person in your life? I have three: my mother, my brother and my boyfriend.

Did you enjoy reading all these random questions as much as I enjoyed writing them?

^The evolution of the number 9 (see question 9).

Concept extracted: Questions.

[pauldeckerus]

Early Photos vs. Now: Seeing Progress as a Photographer

Whelp! The Internet reminded me a few days back that I’ve officially been shooting photography for over 10 years now. I’ll be honest, I thought my progress would have been further. I assume the end of my life will be something like what I am currently experiencing, which is “Wow, that went fast.” It seems I’m just barely starting to grasp the wise words of my elders when they told me “Time goes quicker than you think.”

Recent artwork from my 2018 RGG EDU tutorial. Both tutorials I’ve released with them are some of my favorite accomplishments.

In the spirit of anniversaries, let’s see just how f**king horrifying Year 1 and 2 really were… *Takes a deep breath* To the archives!

What’s this ‘flower’ setting on my point and shoot?? Oh s**t! You can take pictures of things close up! Woo!”*misses putting subject in focus

“Yes yes, let’s do a fake blood-filled cup and some s**tty pearls cause Anne Rice got me hooked on f**ken vampires in the 90’s!” Shot again with a point and shoot, with some lamps for lighting and some brutal Photoshop work to make up for the lack of lighting knowledge. Also had clearly not heard the term “Color Temperature” yet.

“Flash can be turned on manually on my Nikon Coolpix, and if I put it in front with the sun behind, it does THIS?? Well this is my new favourite thing ever!” Then I remembered that mosquitoes suck and promptly scampered into the studio for mostly ever more.

Photographed in my fridge, cause I learned that big soft light is sexy, and lamps just weren’t doing the trick.

Blown highlights and crushed shadows and no concept of color harmony?? You mean sky glitter and trendy as f**k presets…

When I first picked up a camera it was mostly to be creative in a way that didn’t involve modeling, and it was faster than drawing. I photographed macro, still life, bikes, and over the course of a year, a number of friends and slave labored my sister a bunch. The first few years were the most exciting cause the gains were exponential, obvious, and relatively easy to attain.

Admittedly, Year 1 was probably my most fun year in photography. Not that the subsequent haven’t delivered amazing memories and new friends, but I was in it purely for the fun and had no expectations from anyone but me. I didn’t have goals, a client wish list, no questions of what gear would make my work better, or any desire beyond the next batch of point-and-shoot pixels that would get my dopamine levels hopping off the charts.

Early years are dedicated to trying a lot of things, as many different facets as possible. I don’t think anyone should be really trying to “figure out their style” because if we do enough work and spend the hours just being immersed in it, style will inevitably start to form. Sometimes it looks like what’s already being made, and sometimes it turns into a creature that nobody has ever seen before. Regardless of what it is, you have to have your ass in the seat as often as you can or want, to find that voice.

10 years in, it feels like the gains I make now are at the sacrifice of dragging myself over broken glass while an elephant steps on my back. I’m not here because I retained that energy of “This is the best thing evaaarrrr!” from the early days, but because discipline and stubbornness have forced me to continue. When I’m bashing at the walls of my inability to complete a concept that’s been in my mind for 5 years, and I’m still probably another 2-3 years away from being competent enough to finalize the piece, I know I’m in it for the long game.

Time has taught me the harder things feel in the moment, the more frustrated and pressurized my brain feels over the work, I’m probably just getting closer to my next sliver of a creative breakthrough. I’ll trade one elephant for another bigger, slightly heavier elephant. While they trade places though, in those brief moments I’ll find I can breathe again.

A recent challenge to create an image using only one area of the color wheel. Many thanks to Linda Friesen for channelling her inner Moon Goddess.

Those Moments Are What I Live For

I write this all to serve as a reminder, to those in their first year, or to the grizzled veterans staring down a resume longer than a CVS receipt. Where we started and where we are now is worth celebrating. Most of us weren’t born with a natural “talent” — in fact, many would argue that is a myth. We are simply a result of repetition and practice.

I think a lot of people get intimidated in their early years that their work will never look as good as they want it to. I can’t speak for anyone else, but I can definitely say that 10 years in, I’m still another 10 years away from doing the kind of work I want to make. I hope it never changes.

My inbox is filled with emails asking the same question written hundreds of different ways, but the theme can be boiled down to “How do I get awesome at this??”

Answer? I could write an essay but here are some easy points:

Just keep at it. Put your ass into frequent, habitual practice.

Most who are any good, sit upon a throne of really, really terrible work, and years of it. Every time you complete a work of art that you think is pretty f**king awful, congratulate yourself. It’s one more foundation stone into your cathedral of mastery.

Do not look for shortcuts. You’re only stealing from your future-self.

There is no “one path to success”. There are thousands of ways, and what works for one may not work for another.

Know thyself. Inspiration is great, but nothing beats digging into the nuts and bolts of your honest creative self.

Self portrait, trying to grind down on better color theory. I probably need to watch Kate Woodman’s RGG tutorial…

Maybe you are the creator who does a little bit of everything from now until forever. Maybe you’re the type who started one style and never ever changes. There is no right or wrong answer. Far as I know, they don’t hand out medals in the afterlife… yet.

“They” say if you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life. I’ve met some of those humans, and they’re most often either f**king unicorns, or completely disillusioned. Love what you do, or don’t, regardless your ass is probably gunna work pretty damn hard.

I fall in and out of love with my chosen career and lifestyle on a weekly basis. I equate my career to being in a long-term, committed relationship. Some days we wake up and look at each other in bed and wonder why the other is still there. Others we are reminded what got us there in the first place. Regardless of my feelings, I think they’re mostly irrelevant.

Accurate depiction of real life misery. Brought on by walking barefoot into a glacier fed, cold ass lake, or occasionally just trying to will myself into turning on my computer… Side note – Check out those “I clearly only ever wear boots” pasty ankles!

10 years in, I feel like I’m just cracking the surface of “me” and what that means to be a creator. Seated upon a mountain of embarrassing pixels and memories, I’m staring at the bottom of an even larger heap that I will create over the next decade. My well-made list of goals and plans will probably get muddled and misplaced by the chaotic influence that is life, but another 10 years will pass regardless.

I just hope that my small, infinitesimal contribution of creativity will maybe start to balance out the number of straws I’ve used.

Commissioned work for guitar queen Nita Strauss.

Inspiration time! I managed to convince some mind-bogglingly awesome artists from a variety of genres to also dig into their archives, and bravely share some of their own humble beginnings. This was a very cathartic experience for me. It was so just absolutely f**king perfect seeing where they all started to their current favorite work. Remember, we all start somewhere, and with a few years of dedication, we never know where we will wind up.

Dave Brosha

2003. “Pure garbage. Both emotionally and metaphysically.”

2018. “The only thing between where you are and where you want to be is the passion to learn and putting the time in. Some of my earliest images are laughably make-your-eyes-bleed bad – but I never beat myself up for them. They are what they are…and that’s to say, they’re part of the process of learning and growth.”

Visit his website here.

Curtis Jones

2012. “Cape Spear, Newfoundland. Completely disregarding geography, composition, and proper use of a tripod, I felt this was a pretty solid shot of my friends under the northern lights. To be honest, I’m not 100% certain a tripod was even involved but I was out there making an effort and that’s what sticks with me. Turns out the most easterly point in Canada isn’t a hotspot for aurora activity.”

2018. “Khongoryn Els, Mongolia. Now, with a few more miles racked up, an appreciation for location scouting and a better grasp on my gear, putting in the effort still counts but the returns have become more consistent – less random and more intentional.”

Visit his website here.

Felix Inden

2008. “I was really stoked about this one. Enough to save it as my first .psd (of course after reducing to 72 DPI)”

2018. “I was incredibly lucky that I got this shot… it was not thought or anything. I just saw it coming, fired away and luckily had the right settings from shooting out of the heli before of this moment. Don´t plan to much. embrace spontaneity. be there and be ready.”

Visit his website here.

Michael Shainblum

2007.

2018.

Visit his website here.

Tim Kemple

2004. “From my first commercial shoot. It was on Mt Washington for Eastern Mountain Sports and we had this awesome but wacky creative director that wanted a shot of the less glamorous moments that happen when you are out hiking. Shot on slide film. Provia 400F pushed a stop.”

2015. “Two climbers on Mt Huntington in Alaska. Shot with Phase One medium format from a helicopter.”

Visit his website here.

Elizabeth Gadd

2008. “10 years ago I discovered my passion for taking moody self portraits (because sitting on the ground and staring into space with a blurry focus seemed cool). Can’t believe how proud I was of this one once.”

2018. “10 years later, still taking moody self portraits. Hoping the practice has paid off!”

Visit her website here.

Bella Kotak

2008. “This was when I first discovered Photoshop! It took me a few more years to figure the program. At that time it wasn’t really about improving my “photography” but more about how I could improve on what I wanted to express. It just so happened that the camera felt like most natural medium to do that through.”

2018, The Kiss. “It’s amazing what time, practice, and knowledge can do. When it comes to creating pictures I’ve never focused on what I can’t do but rather, what I can do. The goal is, and has always been, to shoot often, keep learning, constantly experimenting, never hold back, and always try to level up.”

Visit her website here.

Kate Woodman

2014. This image represents my first real foray into using Photoshop in a creative/artistic way vs. a more conventional dodge-and-burn-cleanup kind of way. The image was accidental–one of my strobes didn’t fire, and I was left with something I wasn’t anticipating but though could lead to something interesting. It was the first time I really embraced a mistake as a learning opportunity–and I’ve made many more and learned so much from them, from both a technical but also a conceptual perspective.”

2018. “I feel like I’m finally getting to the stage where my photography not only reflects my aesthetic preferences but also my conceptual interests. This is a more recent image which I think is pretty successful in portraying a narrative that is both visually and viscerally impactful. There’s definitely something going on but it leaves room for interpretation–that ambiguity is something I’ve always liked in others’ art and strive for in my own.”

Visit her website here.

Richard Terborg

2009. ” I like the snow, and I like photography. So I figured it would be funny to combine the two in a “creatively next level” way, by wearing my normal “day” clothes instead of winter clothing. Because I didn’t want my garden in the background this frame was the only one that worked.”

2018. “I’ve been on a Wes Anderson exploration/funk/inspired by/phase/binge??? So I asked my friend to bring anything yellow he has and a puffy hat. It was around 35 degrees celcius outside and he had to put on the only yellow woolly shirt he had and a warm cap. Love places with a lot of color and lines because of ‘Wes’ and this place just clicked perfectly.”

Visit his website here.

Julia Kuzmenko

2007. “I honestly had no clue what I was doing. I know now, that the best thing to learn something in a specific photography genre is to break apart and analyze every aspect of the images of a handful of successful artists whose work resonates with me the most. The cropping, the colors, the makeup, hair and facial expressions.. everything that we photographers have control of at the time of the capture.”

2018. “Shoot, shoot, shoot more! Practice like a maniac, so you are at the right skill level when the opportunity comes along.”

Visit her website here.

Tina Eisen

2009. “February. I had one light and a friend called Hannah. We knew nothing. Even less than Jon Snow. Not even the cat bowl was safe.”

2018. “September. I know a couple more things now! I still experiment to this day and wake up happy every morning that I took this step 10 years ago!”

Visit her website here.

Pratik Naik

2008. “I wanted to be a fashion photographer with my wonderful wide angle kit lens and sweet angles. I thought the more angles the better and so we angled all day.”

2018. “I realized what was actually kept me inspired was the complete opposite. It was energy, mood, and emotion. Through my attempt at fashion photography, I carved the path to what I really loved shooting.”

Visit his website here.

Benjamin Von Wong

2007. “Well, I found a second set of mirrors… on another escalator haha. Theres a nice big flash hiding my head but I thought it’d make a cool effect on the metal parts.”

2018. “Ironically, I believed myself to be a better photographer then, than I do now, even though my skill level is objectively higher. I wonder how I’ll feel about myself and my work in another 10 years!”

Visit his website here.

Ashley Joncas

2010. “I was always a disgruntled little $hit even when I started teaching myself photography. I was obsessed with antique portraiture but also obsessed with HotTopic…so the dynamic duo combined with me barely knowing how to turn on a camera ended up in a branch explosion from my friends head surrounded by fake smoke. Thankfully 8 years has made a big difference…and I’ve gone from doing a horrible job to actual horror photography.”

2018. “The work I do now is directly indicative of how my creative mind works and what it responds to. For a while I thought being a good photographer meant doing pretty images with flower crowns and safe color palettes, but I realized my voice was in the strange and irregular chasms of our reality. So, my favorite image from this year is a shot of someone sitting in a basement with a bloody eye and shackles.”

Visit her website here.

The Art of Mezame

2013. “I thought using a single LED light and a Samsung Galaxy S3 was good enough for toy photography. I remember the motivation for using the LED light was just so I could see something in the dark. I don’t remember editing the image though haha!”

2018. “I am now actively shooting portraits in studios and using more than just LED lights. Instead of lighting things up just so I can see something in the dark, I use lighting and lightshapers to craft images that tell stories. Only time will tell what else I could discover in my journey as a photographer. Still learning, never stopping.”

Visit his website here.

Joel Robison

2009. “Back in the early days I was still a bit nervous to really get outside and shoot, I was largely taking self-portraits inside my apartment and really only had one bare wall to play with. I was doing a 365 project and ideas were getting thin so I decided to do a week of making props out of cardboard…I whipped up a cardboard gun, money bag and mustache and spent a good solid 5 minutes shooting this image which I then ran through Picnic AND Photoshop to get the desired “vintage” effect.” We all started somewhere and I can’t believe I thought it all looked good!”

Visit his website here.

Webb Bland

2005. “Distortion? Check. Vignetting like I stacked too many polarizers? Check. A pass of every free plugin I could find? Check and mate, photographers! *Retouchers. Whatever.”

2019. “High noon in an airplane graveyard, spacing each car between stark wing shadows. The only thing missing is the abysmal HDR and VIGNETTING OH GOD HOW DID I FORGET THE VIGNETTING??! Shot for Audi.”

Visit his website here.

Alex Ruiz

1993. “Crappy figure drawing: This gem was from my submission portfolio to Cal Arts. Needless to say, I didn’t get in. In retrospect this was valuable lesson for me: get damn good at figure drawing or else I wasn’t going anywhere!”

2018. “Kat Livingston as Elven Queen. There’s something about creating portraits that I’ve always been drawn to more and more over the years. There’s a deep intimacy to it, having a character stare deeply back at you, and sometimes through you. This one is based off New York model, Kat Livingston. Giving her an ethereal, elven quality seemed fitting for her.”

Visit his website here.

John Gallagher

2013. “My Little Pony – A cautionary tale. I’m fond of migrating beloved and nostalgic animated content to ‘real world’ to test my own ability to stay true to the characters while transforming them for fun. This is a gorgeous cringe worthy example of what not to do. Cue sharp inhale.“

2018. “So Deadpool… This won 2nd place in the DeviantArt fan art poster contest with Fox. DA picked five fan-favorite artists to compete for prize money and a trip to New York to the premiere. There was a long list of no-fly zones for content and just a couple days to do it so we all hit the ground running. I thought it came together pretty well and dovetailed nicely with the slo-mo mayhem of the DP cineverse. It’s a natural fit for my brand of hyperkinetics.”

Visit his website here.

The best way to see our progress is to occasionally take an honest look back at our past. What kind of people we were, what we valued, and how we expressed it. While it sometimes feels weird or awkward to look back at our less than experienced selves, they are the treasures that helped us become who we are, and what we do now shapes our futures.

It’s also so easy to get caught up in comparing ourselves to others, the mysteries behind the scenes that helped evolve the final product they now share to the world.

This list is only a snapshot in each person’s life, a single Polaroid in an entire journal to be perceived as warnings or inspiration. Inevitably there will be someone commenting about “I like x image more!” or “I wish I was as good as their befores”. If those are your thoughts, I applaud your skill in missing the point.

Remember, we are only in ultimate competition with our younger and future selves. Our journeys are our own, appreciate the past and embrace the next 10 years.

About the author: Canadian born and raised, Renee Robyn is a former model turned photographer who has developed an ethereal style, combining fact and fiction. The opinions expressed in this article are solely those of the author. Merging together expertly shot photographs with hours of meticulous retouching in Photoshop, Robyn’s images are easily recognizable and distinctly her own. She travels full time, shooting for clients and teaching workshops around the world. You can find more of her work on her website, Facebook, and Twitter. This article was also published here.

from Photography News https://petapixel.com/2018/09/13/early-photos-vs-now-seeing-progress-as-a-photographer/

[pinelimelife]

Smack My Limes Up

Limes like me tend to not do well with minimal rest, and I’d probably sum that up as my weekend. Today’s blog entry is the first of my BIG Sunday entry. My big Sunday entry consists of not only what I’ve been up to but also includes my thoughts on chosen films, songs, games, and TV shows. So strap yourselves in... Oi, don’t you run, get back here! I will apologise now if I babble on for too long... Am I really sorry? Who knows, who cares, enjoy. To start of it has been a busy weekend. I’ve had my friend over, we plastered through the new season of Iron Fist yesterday on Netflix. We drank, we drank more, my mate fell asleep, woke up and we drank some more on Friday. We’ve watched old game recordings, we watched funny glitches and mods on youtube, and watched “Not Another Teen Movie” which is a comedy we both watched when we were younger.  How did the Carpal Tunnel test go? Depending on your definition of what really well is, I’d say really well. The test was like a nerve conductivity test. They’d hook me up to this machine and send electricity though the nerves in my hand to see if they are still alive and not damaged. Prior to the test, they make you sit in the waiting room holding a hot plate (it’s like some weird hard thing heated up inside some sort of cloth type covering)... No I don’t get what I said either. I can only describe it as a hot water bottle with no water. I was told I’d feel discomfort but actually I weirdly enjoyed the sensation of electricity in going through my hands and began giggling... Yes, because I’m a weirdo. I don’t have Carpal Tunnel which is brilliant news but it doesn’t answer for the symptoms I had been getting. Which means back to the doctors for discussion. Some of the symptoms have begun subsiding since cutting off caffeinated energy drinks or fizzy drinks though.  Lacuna Coil 119 cinema trip - London, October! An opportunity came up the other day to see a cinematic release of Lacuna Coil’s 119 show back up in London, which is a Q&A with the lead singers of the band and a signing. I just couldn’t control myself. I went to their special show this year back in January, I’ve got their limited edition signed book pre-ordered, and I just wanted to finish off the experience and it seems like a perfect opportunity. Haven’t worked out who I’m taking yet though. The following Film, TV show, Album and Game have been selected by my friend and not by myself. If you wish to see me talk about something here on Sunday’s, you are welcome to send me a message here:  https://www.facebook.com/pinelimelifeblog/ I’m not good with explaining and describing so most of my reviews are probably extremely basic at best and not the most informative. But really I’m just chatting about it. Sadly if it’s not fresh in my mind I find it harder to relay the best bits but here goes: ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Film: Disney’s Robin Hood An interesting pick from my friend, Robin Hood is one of those Disney films I never watched very much. I don’t remember owning it as a kid. I do remember seeing at other peoples houses though. This is a fun and unique version of the Robin Hood story, told with talking animals who are absolutely fun to watch. The animation is beautifully done considering that i was entirely hand drawn, which I feel is a much more skillful craft than most modern animation (I love modern animation though). My favourite scene is near the beginning with Robin Hood stealing gold from Prince John whilst they are on the road. Little John kisses Prince Johns fingers whilst in disguise as a woman and steals his ring jewelry. Oh yeah, and Robin Hoods disguise at the archery game always cracks me up. My favourite character would be hard because there are so many great characters in it. Prince John, Little John and Sir Hiss are probably my favourites for various reasons. The comedy characters always pull me in when watching these types of films. I love the screenplay between Little John and Sir Hiss, they just work so well together as characters it’s like a comedy duo of two completely different types of personality. The voice actors were amazingly good at their parts, but I found Disney films often did have good voice actors back then. Some people I know didn’t like the film very much but that’s just what their taste is like really. 

My rating: 7/10 IMDB’s rating: 7.6 ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Album: The Prodigy’s - Fat Of The Land How old was I? The album was released in 1997 which means I would have been in my 7th year of school. This was the year after meeting my best mate I must have been 10/11. Did I own the album? I never owned the album. I knew people who had the album, but my earliest memories of the album songs were seeing the videos for songs like Breathe and Firestarter appear on the music channels at home. Was my taste influenced? Interestingly I reckon my taste was influenced by the Prodigy but in a way that was indirect as most of their music I had heard through others. It was at a time where I was really liking the sound of electronic types of music like Daft Punk on top of the music I already liked by then. Favourite track? My favourite track for a while was Firestarter but eventually it became Breathe. The video for breathe is what really got me, it's dark, it's weird. It's probably the time I began to notice The Prodigy visually rather than just through songs actually. Even as I write this I'm watching the video. My rating for Fat Of The Land - The Prodigy is a 9. It's definitely up there with a lot of other albums i love.   ------------------------------------------------------------------------ TV Show: Steins Gate (Anime show) First of all, yes I love anime, I love Japanese animation. I also love beautifully done animations as well. While Steins Gate isn’t the most beautifully animated I’ve seen it is one of my favourites. One of those “I’m not sure if i’d like this” turned fan. So what’s it about?: Steins gate is pretty much about time travel, the lead character Rintaro Okabe and a bunch of friends customising a microwave into a device that is able to send texts into the past. The synopsis on IMDB says it simply as: “After discovering time travel, a university student and his colleagues must use their knowledge of it to stop an evil organization and their diabolical plans.“ Favourite characters?: Well straight of the bat my favourite character was the main character Rintaro Okabe.I love his passion, his madness, his ways of explaining things, and his quirkiness. He’s like a mad scientist type character whose working to defeat evil. I found this anime particularly hard to grasp from episode 1 and took a few episodes to get me hooked. I actually did like the main character from the first episode. The other characters are also brilliant as well like Mayuri Shiina whose importance to the main character becomes much more in depth and clearer as the show goes on (without spoiling anything). I haven’t finished watching Steins Gate 0 which is the sequel to Steins Gate. It’s got a different vibe to it compared to series 1, but you’d have to watch the first series to really get the second series. Best not to start with Steins Gate 0.  My Rating: 9/10 (But very narrowly. Probably more of an 8.9 or something.) IMDBs Rating: 8.7 ------------------------------------------------------------------------

Game: Goldeneye 64 The N64 is an important console to me. It’s the console that even to this day still connects me to new friends that I find. Often talking about it’s catalogue of brilliant and amusing multiplayers and single player games. But the most iconic for me is this game, Goldeneye 64. It was my uncle who gave me Goldeneye 64 to play, he was the one who got me into it. I remember it very well. I believe the year was also around 1997 when I first played it. I was also getting into watching the films at the time but I already loved Goldeneye the movie anyway. I can’t remember what I was playing at the time, probably Mario Kart or something. He brought it up and said give this ago, try the first few levels. So I did, and I got hooked from there. Then he came up and showed me the multiplayer mode and I had my arse kicked, that was the beginning of many arse kickings for me but I got better.  It’s a game I still play to this day, playing with friends who won’t play the game with me anymore because I always win. I don’t have to play it for long time my memory with the game remains intact. I always remember playing the game at youth clubs with other people and I’d normally end up 3rd in a match. Obviously as time went on and new consoles and games appeared people began to forget how to play on the N64 but I kept it alive in the background.  A few years ago I was challenged to a Goldeneye death match by someone who claimed they was ‘king’ of the game, others vouched the authenticity of it. The challenge was over mid way though the second game. I had already thrashed the guy in the first round, the second round was fairer but he still was losing so he gave up.  I’d say the game was very faithful to the film, even though it was made in a time where being faithful to the film didn’t actually matter as much. In fact it was packed with cheats, and a few extra levels, not to mention a multiplayer that was never originally going to be included in the game in the first place.  Favourite level?  My favourite level, well actually favourite levels are: Facility, Silo, Control and Aztec. With many few close ones like Archives, Depot, Bunker 2 etc.  Favourite multiplayer setup? Well, it would still have to be licensed to kill mode, facility and power weapons. Favourite multiplayer character? I’d normally never choose the main characters, often going for Janus Special forces or something else. But if I do choose a main character, Bond or Baron Samedi. Remember Oddjob is out of bounds.  Favourite multiplayer level? Actually a close call between Facility, Temple and Complex. These are also my most memorable. I recently played it with a friend of mine, I mentioned it on a previous blog and there’s a link to the challenge video we did. Check it out if you want: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSFjiqVW2Nc My rating: 9.5/10 One of my most beloved games of all time. Right, now I’m sure you’ve had enough of my yapping... and oh my god is that the time? I’ve got more Black Sails to watch... I must make the most of my Sunday’s... I may have to cut the size of this blog o_o... It’s too much for me... I don’t enjoy writing...  Lime

[carlculationinfinityinterviews]

STANLÆY INTERVIEW

STANLÆY, an artist who creates music that brilliantly uses vastly textural compositions fused with a visual counterpart. 

STANLÆY’s  latest release titled The Human Project explores the elements and embodies each of them in both sight and sound. The Human Project is an incredibly immersive experience that’s ethereal and captivating.  

I interviewed STANLÆY at The Maple Leaf Lounge Sessions in Southampton to talk more about the album and musical origins of the band. 

STANLÆY-THE HUMAN PROJECT TRAILER

What was your first encounter with music and what inspired you to become a musician and what is the drive behind you wanting to create music?

I couldn't pin down a singular experience that made me want to become an artist or that led me to become a creative individual. My earliest musical memories were from listening to records that that my dad played around the house or on our many journeys to Cornwall. They were things like Kate Bush, Damien Rice, and Jeff Wayne's Musical Version of The War of the Worlds. One of the earliest artists I can remember being fond of outside of my Dad's influence was Cocorosie.

I've been classically trained from quite a younge age. The first instruments that I learned to play were piano and viola.

The main drive behind my desire to create music is the process of world-making and story-telling. I love to create musical spaces with other musicians using texture, composing for all kinds of instruments but also I find lyrics very important and I spend a lot of time playing around with language.

What was the first piece of music you sought out to buy and how would you describe the experience of engaging with music at that early phase?

The first CD that I can remember owning and loving was by Sigur Ros Inni Mer Syngur Vitleysingur- it’s just beautiful. It’s one of those albums that I can listen to on repeat still, it really used to annoy my family so I used to listen to it with headphones secretly in my room.

How did  STANLÆY begin and how did you want to achieve with it from the begin into comparison to what you wanted to artistically when it started in comparison to now?

I didn't actually start writing music till I moved to live in France for a bit, a few years ago. I had written a fair few songs before then but I didn't consider myself as a solo performing artist at that time.

STANLÆY officially began when I moved to Paris and met a guitarist called Marco Pavesi. Stanhopea was the first musical pseudonym I used because I wanted to separate my identity from the music I was making. Why the band is called STANLÆY is quite a long story with a web of reasons all tying into one another – but in short: I wanted the band to have its own androgynous body. Also, my dad’s nickname was Stan at school, even though his name is Adrian! I have always thought that was funny and I like the family link Stanley has to me.

The vision has changed a lot for what I wanted to achieve with STANLÆY. It's now become an encompassing art form that's audio visual, and ever evolving. My latest release The Human Project features a video for each song embodying the sound and image of the elements.

Tell me about the process of wanting to make The Human Project Audio Visual and the meaning behind some of the songs featured on the album and how you wrote them?

I made my first music video for The Fisherman's Wife last summer 2016 and fell in love with film making which made me decide to make an audio-visual album for my next musical project. 

STANLÆY-THE MOUNTAIN COLLECTOR 

The album is an exploration of embodiment that I completed alongside my degree whilst I was studying at Southampton University. I decided that I wanted to work with brilliant musicians and compose brilliant things for them to play.

I was told that it was a very ambitious project but I knew that I could do it. I composed all of the parts and recorded/engineered everything in about six months and then premiered the film counterpart at The Harbour Lights Cinema in Southampton in May!

The instrumentation for The Human Project consisted of thirty different musicians featuring strings, harps, percussion, various different drummers and vocalists. I recorded all of the main vocals and piano parts as well.

The first song that I composed was Earth, The Mountain Collector. 

STANLÆY-THE MOUNTAIN COLLECTOR

This song began with the chorus riff and the backing vocals which I demoed in Logic. I treated that idea like a sketch and applied the same creative ideas as sculpting a piece, I slowly started adding parts in Sibelius since I knew that I wanted other instruments to be a feature of that track.

Earth is about the effect of being trapped in corrupt environment that you aren't connected to and the feeling of wanting to return to your roots. The video tells the story of four rams gambling. I run away and try to find my way back to the mountains because I'm disconnected with the environment, like how I was losing the game. I return, grow and turn into a mountain in this new environment because I believe we echo the environment we are surrounded by and exposed to. The song was written for string quartet, double bass, drums, piano and vocals. I really enjoy the space in the track.

Water

Water has three sections to it and the initial creative concept was based around particles. I wanted the instrumentation to be scatty and all over the place with interlocking polyphony between the harp, strings and bass. I had choir made up of five people and had the bass playing a higher melody so that it could interject between the main vocal line.  Every instrument acts like a separate vocal line or a lyric that tells a different story throughout.

Tell be about the process of playing the recorded material live. Since you've featured 30 musicians on The Human Project, what do you want musicians to experience live in comparison to your recorded material?

It would be amazing to play with an orchestra and mix all of these amazing sounds together one day! I don't know of that's plausible right know though. Also, finding a time where thirty musicians are available would be a nightmare to organise.

I chose to make it more manageable for myself by arranging the pieces for a smaller ensemble, my current line up consists of bass, drums/percussion, guitars and vocal and sax. I'll have a violinist play with me eventually though in order for that to happen I'll need to find someone who is also passionate about the music.

I actually really love playing music differently to how it is on record, that's what I did when I released my first album Ouroboros. I like to keep it interesting for the musicians and for listeners. It’s really fun and sometimes a good challenge for me to rearrange everything… it’s only natural to evolve, it doesn't need to be the same.

STANLÆY-NME

How do you maintain your proficiency as a musician and ensure that you are progressing?

I try to listen to as much music as possible, I have a lot of great friends and we all recommend different albums to each other I've been introduced to a plethora of great artists that I may not have found on my own… like a photograph you get exposed to a lot of things and you get over exposed, that's the best kind of photograph.

In regards to maintaining my proficiency I am still practising classical violin and piano. I am also always learning more about the guitar and vocals. I think for me, stepping back from music to focus on other to art forms is really important too (and influenced how you therefore keep creating art) so I work on other things such as painting, film making, yoga, cycling, going to as many live gigs as I can and meeting lots of different people/exposing myself to as many different things as possible.  

What are you currently listening to and what was the last form  that really expand what you thought you was creatively possible?

I've been listening to a lot of Joanna Newsome lately and I've been painting a lot so it’s great to listen to put on full albums on repeat whilst I'm doing that. Something that I really love about her work is how she weaves lyrics together into such delicate/intricate stories.

I like to tell stories through songs so its inspiring to hear someone else do that. A very inspiring band I've been listening to at the moment is This Is How We Fly. They are from Dublin and feature a percussionist, wind instruments, violinist and saxophone, they basically create beautiful riff based folk jazz with soundscapes. I like to write music that has a lot of sonic textures and use instrumentation/instruments collectively to create a sonic tapestry, it’s like painting with sound and the sounds creates a space to inhabit. I love listening to bands that create music like that.

What equipment are you using?

I'm using hollow body Grestch at the moment that I have called Oak. For pedals I'm using a Boss DD6 and Electro Harmonix POG.

What advice can you give to musicians that are starting out or thinking of writing their own music or becoming a performing artist?

I'd advise that you just keep being yourself since it’s maybe easy to start thinking about “what do people want to hear?” instead of what you want to create for yourself.

What do you want people to take away from the Human Project Means?

I'd love for people to feel inspired by the album and feel like they are in the space and environment that the videos reveal. I’d like to connect the viewer sonically to the elements and for people to see music/videos from a new perspective.

STANLÆY will be performing at The Art House Southampton on May 11th, I highly advise that you buy a ticket: 

https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/stanlaey-and-kitty-oneal-at-the-art-house-tickets-45491159282

Please follow STANLÆY at the following links below and support their music:

https://www.facebook.com/StanleyStenning/

https://soundcloud.com/stanlaey

https://stanlaey.com/