#my mom was like ‘you look like a goddess’ and honestly she’s right 😌

[curiosity-killed]

I’m not inclined to post a selfie here so yall will have to imagine but I look so. damn. good yall

[eenochian]

Are there any fictional characters that you think you resemble?

I LOVE THIS QUESTIONNNNNNN <333

i don’t typically think about stuff like this, so this was sorta fun to research lol. i don’t often take pics of myself and i share them even less, so i didn’t exactly have anyone to ask for second opinions 😶

i usually focus on characters that i want to look like more than ones i actually resemble, plus my body type is hard to find in media… but here’s my list 😌

in terms of hair/eye color, my eyes are hazel-green and my hair is auburn. i’ve lost some of my redness in recent years (hair’s more of a cinnamon color currently), but i’m planning on dying it back to auburn lol. two characters i’ve always personally looked at and gone, “ah, ideal version of me!” are mary jane and claire redfield.

growing up, i frequently got compared to any redhead by my family, regardless of how much i actually looked like them – my mom would always compare me to ariel, merida, or anna whenever we’d talk about disney, for example. i’m biased towards redheads (esp. ones with green eyes too) because i’m so used to seeing myself in them, even though i don’t really resemble most of them lol.

as for body type…

i’m stumped, honestly :/ most women in media are given super “ideal” proportions y’know, whether that’s making her super slim, fat, or curvy in just the right places. i’ve got an odd body type, so i’ve yet to encounter a character that looks like me. also haven’t had anyone tell me “[x character] has your body!” so i don’t have any opinions to go off.

if i had to describe myself— i’m a very curvy girl. my thighs are perfect to fit my corgi-sized cat, it would take probably five of my own hands to wrap around the apex of them, and my hips are as you’d expect with that measurement lol. i’ve got a super high waist (just under my chest) that dips in pretty dramatically, and my bra size is 40i.

i know that makes me sound like some jessica rabbit-esque “thicc goddess”, but i’m really not. my stomach isn’t flat, i’ve got a rounder face, and i’m convinced that my legs are weirdly short lmao.

as i was typing this all out, i started talking to my brother about the body type issue, which ended up catching the attention of the rest of my household. according to them, apparently i sorta look like rose from titanic. aka kate winslet in 1997. which is a MAJOR COMPLIMENT, OH MY GOD??? 😭😭

i’ll admit, i kinda see it? face shape has some similarities, but obviously i’m no kate winslet, she’s fucking gorgeous 💀 my hair’s also stock straight to the point of barely holding a curl.

there’s a few more characters that i definitely identify with and could see myself feasibly cosplaying in the future, even though the resemblance is weak at best for most of them. several are women from comics because i love a woman that can kill me <3

(claire is here again bc i honestly prefer her game appearance over the movies lol)

and yes. #5 IS bloom from winx club. i think cosplaying her would heal my inner 9 y/o self that was obsessed with looking like her.

[symphonicmetal101]

For the match up!

(Please 👉👈)

So my favorite animal is a salmon shark, because I love the how Big Scary Fish becomes smol baby with big black eyes, smol chonky angy baby go chomp chomp

“NO MORE SAYING CUSS WORDS GUYS! ITS ILLEGAL AND VIOLENT!”

So, this one time, I was at a family reunion, and apparently someone had passed away recently and I didn’t know? And I loudly asked “WHERES *insert name* she said she’d be here, Imma kill her if she doesn’t have a good excuse for not being here!” And my mom pulled me down, “SHE PASSED AWAY THATS WHY HER FAMILY ISNT HERE!?” And I just died, like the way you die and fall over in Minecraft, me, me all the way, I left the moment I had the chance, People gave me looks of disapproval and my close cousins were laughing and trying to console me from embarrassment …. I didn’t go to any family gatherings for about five months…

I wear a size 9 shoe, what kinda foot fetish data are you getting at? 🤨

I’d I woke up with neon orange hair, I’d be honestly so happy like excited ecstatic. It most likely means I went off the walls, like just crazy and went wild and now have nipple piercing, My friend and I swore that if we ever woke up with neon Colored hair or just something ridiculous, it’s probably because we got dead drunk and we swore next time it’d happen I was getting neon hair and nipple piercing and he was going With a half shaved head and getting a Prince Albert and ladder piercings 🍆 so, I’d honestly be ecstatic I finally got the piercings and hair I wanted

Honestly, I’d love to meet a Pegasus, Since I was young and watched the original Sailor Moon I always had this fantasy of falling in love with a Pegasus Boi and 👏 even if he doesn’t turn into a boy I mean??? FLYING HORSE BRUH?? I’d wear long extravagant gown and just fly around looking like a Goddess??? Yes!!!! 🤍

I’d honestly think, The best pet would be a brachiosaurus 🦕 just hear me out, this thing is massive, and I’d just really like to ride one, get it straight out the egg, care for it, and use it like a horse while it’s smaller, but once it’s grown! Dino rides for families and I COULD MAKE A KILLING OFF IT! Not to sound like Mammon, but IMAGINE THE POSSIBILITIES!? Ya need something pulled??? Don’t worry I’ll just call My best Boi Samson 🦕 over and he can help! Class field trip and the bus is broken? Twenty dollars a person and jump on! Tress growing to close the power line and need to be trimmed? For the right price I’ll bring my baby out to eat away your problems! Pond or lake over flowing? This baby can drink so much water in it, and my wallet is looking kinda light, I think we can arrange something 😌 Need to test how durable your underground bunkers are? For the right price I’ll have this baby walking back and forth all day! Ya kid wants a dinosaur at the petting zoo? You can pay to look or for a few extra bucks you touch and ride.

Personal notes, Im actually really Greedy and prideful, it definitely runs in my family, eccentric, egotistical

I sleep in only under wear, no bra

FREE THE NIPPLE

I work to make money, to buy fancy luxury things even though I’m just and average person,

Mexican American, i forget not everyone speaks Spanish so talking to anyone occasionally I’ll start speaking Spanish and wonder why I’m getting looks :)

One time at a job I insulted and finished off a worker, just for her to tell me she’s my boss under cover, I told her I don’t take back or regret anything and her moms a hoe

I’m a notorious flirt and very manipulative when necessary, only when i want something and can’t get it on my own, I had a sugar daddy for a month and got a Nintendo Switch, a set of Luxury bags, a week long trip to Disney and another week long trip to Universal, Limited Time luxury shoes, some gold, and expensive perfumes and a $2000 dollars a week, He died and I lost the good life 😔

Side hobbies, being an otaku, make up, and baking, I can sleep like a rock lmao, OH!

So, I have a collection of Dildo’s on display in my friends apartment cause we’re wild, we go out and just buy some of the prettiest sex toys just to display them, I really love the crystal clear dildos they shine pretty in the light, and there are plugs that just have the prettiest shiniest Gems and crystals,

If this wasn’t crack enough, I don’t know what else to say 😔 but I hope you enjoy my exposure

Shameless Simp Squad, I don’t know if you can guess who this is but Ill definitely own up to it if/when you expose me

Thank you so much! 🤍🤍 have a good day

At long last

Its time

Do you know how badly I want you to be @mammons-wife ? For no apparent reason I just...I dont know LMAO youve consumed my thoughts with this ask for so long

CW: Slightly nsfw

ASMODEUS, MAMMON, AND BARBATOS

Firsy, first let me- let me just

They dynamic here is you, Asmo, Mammon are "dumbasses" (affectionate) and Barb the "oh fuck those are MY dumbasses"

Please dont be offended by that

Anyways

"NO MORE SAYING CUSS WORDS GUYS! ITS ILLEGAL AND VIOLENT!" I figure is an inside joke of some sort, but also feels like something that drunk AS FUCK Barb yells at the three of you and makes you laugh.

Ok that thing at the family reunion was not your fault, you didnt know lmao. It feels like something Mammon would also do, and would take the fall if something like that happened again with something like "I dared em t'do it" so people are mad at him instead of you until Barb steps in and people just NOPE out of being disgruntled bc fuck upsetting the time lord himself.

The fucking image I get-

Just you and Mammon coming home piss drunk, Mammon has cherry red hair and yours is mac and cheese orange, tumbling in on Barb and Asmo trying to enjoy some tea and gossip. Seeing as youre both so drunk already, Asmo figures you wont feel a thing if he were to give you that nipple piercing youve been wanting and just...does it. So you wake up newly pierced :D so its good that you free the nipple bc its gonna be S E N S I T I V E for a while homie.

Asmodeus can and will convince his unicorn brother to help him track down a pegasus. Barbatos watches through a time bubble, amused as Asmodeus attempts to "pretty up" the pegasus for you, thought the creature doesnt co operate very well until you get there. Asmodeus will let you gawk and coo over the horse with wings for a while before getting a little jealous and wanting skme attention too. Oh and that gown? He sewed it for you lovely.

Hey ho brachio, hey ho go go go totally not from a pink fong song Ik bc of my baby brother yeah, its a great idea in theory and Mammon will help you get sales buuuuuut really someone with...a little more self control should handle the finances. Barb isnt nominating himself, but hes nominating himself.

On a similar note, all three of them are going to want to be sugar babies with you. Especially Asmo. Then Mammon. And yes, even Barb. Dude needs to relax a bit. Also the exchange rate of USD to Grimm is solid. Like....oh I cant remember the math but like $100 was like $8000 Grimm? So find yourselves a human world sugar daddy and youll be FINE.

Your hobbies align with Asmo and Barb, though Mammon has plenty of experience with his little brother, so he'll hear you out gladly on your otaku rambles.

Anyways

I hope this was satisfactory my anonymous friend.

Now come out of hiding!!! /lh