#n i. rlly would love to tell me younger self how i love how she thought through those stuff abt my wol well

[noxtivagus]

my skill is making nonsense out of nothing fr 👍

[bibbykins]

Rocking Chairs and Rocking Cars

A/N: No full blown smut here, but ofc horny thoughts remain! I should be posting the aftermath texts and what not soon, but I hope you enjoy this in the mean time! It’s a bit rushed, but I hope that doesn’t ruin the experience for you! As always, tips are appreciated since I am saving up to buy a house with my gf, but ofc tips are not required! Hope you all have a great day/night!

Note: This is a drabble for The Household’s Bunny Series

Pairing: Soft Yandere! Jungkook x Chubby! Reader x Soft Yandere! Hoseok

Word Count: 5k

Warnings: 18+, crying, lonliness, body image issues, unhealthy workout habits, abandonment, allusions to body dysmorphia, mommy issues, grinding, lustful thoughts, mentions of cumming, mentions of erections, pussy cupping (?), not rlly yandere although this is kinda a soft yandere series, obsessive behaviors, low self esteem, horrible communication, mentions of anxiety, mentions of car shaking

The house was quiet, and somehow knowing that no one else was home made your floor feel that much more empty. Granted, none of the guys came up all that often. Ever the gentlemen, they actively tried not to intrude on your space. Although, you really wish they did on days like these. It was 10am on a Saturday morning, although the lack of natural light could fool anyone otherwise. The clouds were heavy in the sky, cradling the sunlight in a thick blanket of grey, squeezing themselves for all the water they have. The rain tapped on your window, almost mocking you, reminding you that water was the only company you had.

You debated texting to ask if anyone wanted to come home and have a movie night, or build a fort, or just simply sit next to you, but decided you would just be bothering them. You had that very intimate moment with Jin and Yoongi, and they had remained sweet with you, but you weren’t able to be intimate with them again yet. They had been busy and you had been deprived of the very addicting affection. You’re sure they would come to you if asked, but you didn’t want to be clingy. The last thing you wanted to do was annoy them by following them around like a puppy just because they made you cum. They hadn’t explicitly stated they liked you as anything more than a friend, and you never wanted to go through the embarrassment of assuming such a thing again.

With college almost done, you had nothing to distract you from the looming loneliness you feel sometimes, and it was exhausting. You grew up by yourself, and you swore that would change when you were older. You were determined to be surrounded by people who loved you as much as you loved them, and yet, here you were. You were laying on a couch, watching the rain fall, all by yourself in a 10 floor renovated motel, reaping the consequences of high hopes and naivety your child self didn’t understand. You were never good at making friends, not that your plump figure helped you with your social drawbacks either. Although you made peace with your lack of charisma in person and have made strides to loving your body, the loneliness never subsided for long. 

There were few things you loved more than talking to people and having them listen to you and vice versa, and yet it rarely happened. Maybe you had been spoiled by your seven housemates, so it was making this bout of loneliness that much worse. Since moving in, there was almost always someone home making noise or even talking to you. However, they all told you summer was their busy season, and boy, they weren’t kidding. You had caught mere glimpses of the boys this week, only communicating via text and post it notes. 

You pressed your eyes closed for a moment as you listened to the rain. You thought of your mom. Her cheeks were chubby like yours and you remember her crying when she figured your metabolism was the same as hers, and you couldn’t understand why she hated herself so much that she wanted you to be nothing like her. Your mother had always been beautiful in your opinion, and it was a shame she never saw herself, or you, in that way. You thought about forcing yourself to go to the gym with her for hours on end, just to be able to be next to her. You had always been desperate for her company, desperate to be liked by her. Part of you regrets putting your body through that, but then a part of you is happy you were able to spend time with her until she left. 

Ah, yes, the day she left. That’s exactly what you should be thinking about right now, on a rainy day, all by yourself. You cringed when you felt a tear get a little too close to your ear, wiping it away. You were shocked when you felt even more in its wake. You always felt really silly when you cried, but you figured you might as well let it happen if you're gonna be home alone on a rainy day, thinking of all the ways people avoided spending time with you while you tried even harder to spend time with them. Who's next? Jungyoon? The uncle who took you in just to admit drunkenly how much the sight of you upsets him three hours into your 17th birthday. Your dad? No. That's not wise.

You sighed. Maybe if you had learned better social cues when you were younger, you wouldn't be a college graduate with no friends to talk to.

It didn't take long for you to break into full on sobs. You stuck somewhere between angry at the people who didn't want to be with you and sad that they didn't want to. Childishly, you deemed it wasn't fair and all you could do was cry. You hadn't had a day like this in a while, but holy shit did it suck each time.

Eventually, you ceased your tears and were left a red and puffy mess, so you decided to go to the kitchen to depuff your face with some ice. Then the rest of your day could only go up from here. You had your cry, and even though the elevator was going down, your day would only go-

OH NO WHY IS IT STOPPING AT FLOOR 5?!

You couldn't even think of who it could be as you looked in the mirror at the corner of the elevator and wished to evaporate. You had obviously been crying, terribly. Nevermind you were in a cropped long sleeve, short shorts, and thigh highs, your eyes were red and a little puffy, your cheeks were clearly tear stained, and even your lips were swollen. You couldn't, "oh, it's allergies." Your way out of this one.

"I didn't know you were home, Hobi." You murmured.

"Yeah, I just popped in real quick to grab something before I go back to…" Hoseok's smile dropped the instant he saw your face. You didn't even have the chance to look away, but you tried to anyway. He gently gripped your chin, guiding your eyes to meet his, "Bunny, is everything okay?" 

You pressed your lips together before nodding, "Yeah, it's just…" You glanced at his face, surprised to see him clinging onto your every word, "Sometimes, I get lonely." You shrugged as his eyes widened, "I get to thinking about my mom and…" You made vague hand movements as you shrugged.

He thought for a moment, “Even though we all kind of grew up together, we never really treated each other like more than roommates, but you’re here now.” He pulled you into a tight hug and you gasped before relaxing into his embrace. You closed your eyes for a moment as you held him close to you, "We've all been really busy, I didn't even consider how lonely you would feel." He lamented and you shook your head.

"I'm a big girl, I can be alone." Your words were muffled in his shirt, "It's just a little crying-"

"But you don't have to be alone anymore, and I don't want you to cry, none of us do." He placed a chaste kiss on your forehead, "Thinking about my mom used to really ruin my day, doesn't now, so don't worry, but that took time." You nodded, feeling tears creep in again.

"Thank you." You hummed as he pulled back, "Sorry to-"

He shushed you, putting his finger on your lips, shaking his head at your apology.He leaned his forehead on yours, making your breath hitch, "Do you want to go with me?"  He asked softly.

You blinked in confusion, "With you, where?"

His grin only widened and you looked to him skeptically, “Do you trust me?” He asked all too innocently and you nodded, “Then, do you want to go with me?” He asked again as he placed purple-tinted sunglasses on his face.

“I suppose…” You studied his smug face, “Let me go change-” You went to press the next floor so you could get off but were stopped with a soft grip from Hoseok.

“I’m in a bit of a rush, and you look great.” He smiled as the elevator reached the entrance.

You wanted to protest, but you let it be. Surely you would not stick out in the slightly scandalous outfit you were in.Truthfully, it was your body that seemed to make it scandalous to other people. Although, if you had a skirt on, it would just be a typical outfit for you, so maybe it wasn’t so weird? These thoughts ran through your mind as you slipped on some shoes and went into Hoseok’s very nice car. 

So are you gonna tell me where we’re going or…?” You asked as the renowned hair stylist drove with a smirk in response to your question, “Okay Mr. Mysterious, can I ask questions about it until we get there?” You asked cheekily.

He chuckled, “Of course, you can do whatever you want, baby.” His voice was silky smooth and the nickname shot straight to your nether regions and you scolded yourself for it.

“Are we going to a job of yours or am I just running errands with you?” You looked at his unwavering smile as you asked.

“A job, but the client will not mind if you’re there, before you ask.” He stole your next question by answering it smugly. You pursed your lips as you studied him. He was in a lavender dress shirt with the top two buttons undone and sleek navy blue slacks, all of which complimented his black hair. 

You, on the other hand, wore a baby pink turtleneck with the hem ending just barely above your matching form-fitting high-waisted fabric shorts, showing just a sliver of your stomach skin while a lot of your thigh skin was on display with white over-the knee socks. You had taken scandalous photos for your OnlyFans, and if you lifted your arms all the way up, a lacy bralette would greet the outside world. You were just feeling a bit self conscious considering the well dressed man in the car next to you. Sure, you looked cute, but was this level cute appropriate for his job? You didn’t want to make a bad impression and have that effect Hoseok.

“And here we are.” He sang and you snapped back to reality as he parked behind a building that had no defining qualities from the back. The ride went by in a flash and you pouted a bit at not even asking another question.

Ever the gentleman, he opened the door for you as he led you inside with him. The hallways were crowded with people running around like chickens with their heads cut off. Judging by the bits of chatter you could pick up as you scurried behind Hoseok, this was a photography studio and a high-level star was having a photoshoot.

“Oh thank goodness you’re here!” A man that seemed to be in his late 30s sighed in relief when he saw Hoseok, “He is in the worst mood today, and I’m so frightened-who is that?” The man’s wild eyes fixated on you for the briefest of moments and he realized your puffy features and shook his head, “Whatever, just go in there and calm him-”

“This is our housemate, y/n, and the shoot isn’t for another 30 minutes and he just needs hair, right?” Hoseok spoke calmly in spite of the chaos surrounding the both of you as the man nodded, “Great, I just need to touch him up and we’ll calm him down in time to take some good photos.” The man nodded tiredly, “Is the dressing room empty now?”

“Yeah, he kicked everyone out so he could calm down, but that never works.” The man cried out helplessly, “Why is he so frightening?!” Hoseok simply patted the man before navigating the hallways. Frightening? The man shivering looked quite burly and tall, who could be scaring him so much?

The “we’ll” made you nervous, but you held Hoseok’s hand so you wouldn’t get lost until he pushed through a dressing room door, “Hobi’s here.” He chimed and you heard a man behind a partition grunt. You looked around the spacious room to see a comfy looking green L couch along with a wooden rocking chair, which you thought was interesting. Beyond that, there was the typically lavish amount of mirrors and counter space, “I also brought a surprise!” Hoseok sang and you were ripped from your observations.

“It better not be anything dumb-” Jungkook’s voice died on the impact that was emerging from the partition and seeing you. Hise eyes studied your body, namely the slight squish of skin between your socks and shorts, which made his pants feel a bit tight, “Y/n, what…”His voice trailed off when he noticed you had definitely been crying, and not long ago. Right as he was going to accuse Hoseok, he saw you let go of his hand and give him a smile, figuring it wasn’t him that made you upset.

Your eyes brightened when you saw a familiar face, “Oh hi, Kook!” You beamed, “I didn’t realize Hoseok was taking me with him to see you, how nice!” You cheered, “I’ll be out of your way while you work, though!” You went to go sit on the couch as Jungkook nodded, robotically making his way to the chair in front of the mirror. He wore a silky black shirt with a harness around his waist and black slacks with razor thin pinstripes and black dress shoes. His hair was styled mostly to perfection, making you wonder what more there was to do. Alas, you weren’t the professional.

Hoseok looked to the younger man with a smug smile, “Just some last touches need to be done and then you can calm your nerves a bit with our little bunny.” He chided and Jungkook scoffed.

It took no more than five minutes for Hoseok to style the star’s hair into further perfection, “Wow, you look super handsome, Kook!” You cheered, earning a small smile from the man in question.

Hoseo chuckled, “He does indeed.” He cooed, making the younger man scowl, “Now, you have some time to zen out with bunny, use it wisely. I’ll come get you when it’s time.” He patted Jungkook before giving you a wink and exiting the room.

“You having a bad day-”

‘Were you crying?” His voice sliced through yours and you’re taken aback for a moment. With no response, he stood, making his way over to you. He towered over you before leaning down to grip your chin lightly, “Were you?” A hint of worry flashes across his eyes, and you wondered if you were just seeing things.

“Yeah… I was just feeling lonely.” You speak honestly, shrugging, “It’s not a big deal-”

“Why didn’t you call me-or anyone?” He asked, voice rushed as his eyes searched your face for an answer. It’s like an interrogation that you don’t have comprehensive answers for, so you shrug.

“Everyone was busy.” You murmur, “I only cried because I thought about my mom and stuff, it’s okay.” You avoided eye contact with him as you said this, feeling out of your element talking about your mom. This made his mouth part, but he haid no words. He understood what you meant, and that made it all the more harder to comfort you.

Jungkook sighed at how you’ve shrunk under his barrage of questions and sinks down to his knees, his hands going to your waist, stroking the sliver of exposed skin, “Nobody was mean to you, right? You didn’t cry because anyone bothered you?” You smiled at his tenderness before nodding.

You watched his face, studying the cleverly concealed dark circles under his eyes and gave him a sad smile, “Are you having a bad day too, Kook?” You asked softly and he sighed, like he was letting himself relax for the first time before nodding, “I see..” You thought for a moment, unsure how to make him feel better until you remembered, “Did you want to touch my thighs?” You said the first thing that came to mind and before you could be embarrassed, he nodded, "Okay, how do you want me?"

What a question, Jungkook thought, smiling tiredly, "Sit in my lap?" He looked up at you hopefully and you nodded.

"I won't be too heavy or anyth-woah!" You gasped when he lifted you, legs wrapping around his waist as he carried you to the rocking chair, sitting you both down, "I stand corrected." You giggled, wrapping your arms around his neck while his hands placed themselves on your thighs.

He closed his eyes for a moment, feeling your thighs in his hands, rocking you both back and forth. In every dressing room, he required a rocking chair, in case he needed to calm down. He debuted at the ripe age of 15 and with no guardian until 17, he was prone to panic attacks. The company sent him to therapy and the rocking chair was introduced. He never let anyone touch the chair, but he couldn't deny how nice it was having you in his arms, cradling his head into your bosom. 

“I like the rocking chair, very calming.” You mused, as if reading his mind and he offered a tired hum in agreement.

The day had truly been terrible. Stage after stage, minimal hours of sleep, and stupid people asking the same stupid question. And yet, here you were, hands stroking the skin on his neck as he lost himself in your form. Your thighs were softer than he anticipated, and he felt himself let out an exhausted sigh, finally relaxing into you.

"You haven't been home a lot, so I get why you're so stressed." You mused into his hair, "But you should go a bit easy on the staff, I just saw a buff thirty-something year old near tears when we came in." You giggled and Jungkook couldn't help but laugh a bit.

"Sungmin is my manager, he can take it." He felt blissful for the first time in a while as he rocked you both back and forth, his thumbs stroking the supple skin of your thighs.

"Still, maybe if people aren't so stressed around you, it might ease your stress." You chided softly, pressing a chaste kiss to his head.

The affection made his eyes flutter closed and he hummed, "We'll see, but don't hold your breath." He joked.

You had never felt Jungkook so calm before. Usually he has something snarky or detached to say. Some kind of non committal or indifferent comment, but he was too exhausted to do even that. You smiled softly at the cozyoment and the affection. It was hard to realize how touch starved you were, dreading when you would have to get up.

Youboth rocked back and forth for an indeterminate amount of time, too wrapped up in the calmness of each other’s presence to say much at all.

Finally, you spoke up a bit, "This is making me feel better. I like the closeness a lot." You hummed softly, "I remember when I was in some club in highschool, we were taking photos with girls on the guys's backs and all the guys scrambled to not have to give me a piggyback ride, so I just stood on my own." You did a short laugh. Jungkook fumed at the idea of stupid people making you feel like anything less than perfect, but you continued, "And now I'm in the lap of a pop star, it's a little funny." Now he felt smug, giving your thigh a small squeeze.

"Sounds like you had some weak ass guys in your highschool club." He snorted, leaning his head up as you settled down onto his lap further, now looking eye to eye with your torsos farther apart, his feet planted firmly on the floor to keep the rocking chair still, "I'll deny I was ever this nice, but," He studies your face for a moment, "You're so beautiful." He sighs out and he watched your face light up, and feels what that does to him, scaring the fuck out of him.

You couldn't find words except, "Can I kiss you?" You breathe and he nods with hooded eyes, and before you knew it, you were surging forward to press his mouth to yours. The kiss was fierce, but he responded to it at the speed of light. His mouth moved in sync with yours before taking control of the kiss, moving closer as he stilled the chair. Your hands were shyly clutching his shoulders, careful not to mess up his hair. One hand traveled to your hip as the other massaged your thigh deeply, thumb inching its way to the inner part. Your tongues intertwine and you gasp needily when he's a mere centimeter from where you want him most. You damn near whine when his hand stops inching closer to your core making him grunt.

Jungkook nearly lost his mind when he feels your nails dig into his shoulder and your hips wiggle in the slightest. He wanted to tell you to just mess up his hair, fuck everything else, and just let him make you cum in his lap. He wants to feel what he’s doing to you, uninhibited. His hand cups your sex and you groan into his mouth. He smirks at how warm it is, how wet you must be from a little bit of kissing, and how wet you will-

KNOCK, KNOCK

You jump, effectively falling off of the chair, and onto the floor just as Hoseok walks in, "Hey Jungkookie, it is time to- Bunny?!" Before Jungkook can even reach out his hand, the older man is helping you up.

"I'm alright, just clumsy." You chuckle awkwardly, before turning to the celebrity, thanking the stars his makeup and hair aren't messed up, "Well, have a good photoshoot!" You beamed, "Let's go get some lunch, Hobi." You spoke rushedly as you took the man's hand, dragging him along.

"Oh, uh, bye!" Hoseok hollers to the dumbfounded Jungkook as he watched the dressing room door close, leaving him winded with a boner.

When you get in the car, your eyes are like saucers and Hoseok can't help his curiousity as he turns on the car. However he doesn’t push until you both are a little closer to home, but before he can even ask you grab his leg and stare at him with panicked eyes, "Fuckfuckfuckfuckwhatthefuckdid- AHHH!" You let out the quietest scream, before looking at him, "How do I go about life this stupid?" You seem to be genuinely asking and yet again, before he can ask, "I kissed Kook and I let him hold my pussy for a moment." You blurt out and Hoseok blinks for a moment. You look to him, waiting for him to freak out but he just shrugs.

"Well color me a bit envious." He muses, before tilting his head in confusion, “When you say he held you pussy-"

“He cupped it and I was gonna let him go further had you not walked in.” You looked to the man as he saw home in sight.

“Ah, I see.” He nods thoughtfully, “So were we wanting to pick something up for lunch or just order delivery, we could cook…?”  

You gaped at him, "Are you not gonna tell me how dumb that was?!" Hoseok shakes his head, "He probably hates me now!" You whined.

Hoseok sighs, "I promise, he doesn't." He reassured you, "Did he… kiss back?" He asks curiously.

"Yes, but I'm not sure what he meant by it." You murmured, "I’m really bad at gathering those kinds of clues. I kissed him because he called me beautiful and I didn't know how to respond and I-"

"You're beautiful." Hoseok interjects, "My turn, my turn!" He parks the car at the house, turning to you with a grin.

"Wait, that's it!" You point to him, "You can tell me what kind of kiss that was." You beamed and he looked at you quizzically, "So kiss me and I'll show you how Kook kissed back so I can understand!" 

Hoseok could not believe his ears. Had people played with your head before? Did you seriously not understand that kissing back meant that they were attracted to you, at the very least. Not wanting to take advantage of you he asked, "Are you sure? You can just describe it to me-"

You nodded, "I don’t want to misrepresent it with my words but I need to know what it meant, but if you feel weird about kissing me I get it-"

Hoseok was watching the chance slip away, so he pressed forward, placing his mouth on yours and groaned when you responded with a force, hand going to his thigh to try and mimic Jungkook's movement. Your tongue finds his way into your mouth and he can’t resist the opportunity to feel your tongue against his. His hand goes to the back of your neck to press his mouth into yours deeper. It was in no time you both forgot what you should be doing.

All you could focus on was how good the affection felt. How nice it was to have someone’s mouth on yours just as needily. You were used to sex and affection being out of convience. You were used to people seeing you willing and figuring, “Why not?” But Hoseok and Jungkook had kissed you with a certain force you had never known. Where Yoongi and JIn were soft, sweet,and comforting, they were urgent, needy, but rough.

Hoseok’s arms wrap around you, bring you into his lap and you feel his growing length beneath you. Against better judgement, you grind down, causing the both of you to gasp, “Fuck, baby.” He groans, gripping you to him harder. His leans down to kiss your jaw and reach your neck, making you press yourself further onto him with a choked moan when you feel him guide you hips as you set a steady pace grinding into him. You groan at the sensuality of hearing his voice riddled with lust and making the windows steamy and the expensive car rock.

“Hobi,” You moan out as he sucks a particular spot on your neck, “Feels good.” You whined, grinding yourself more desperately.

“It does, bunny?” He cooed into your neck, trying to shield his own rising arousal as you  grind onto it desperately. You nodded with a moan and found yourself wishing he would just strip you of your clothes and take you. You would love nothing more than to feel his hands around your neck as he pounded into you, your hips working as wildly as they were then with his hands on them, threatening to limit you, edging you closer, and closer, and-

HONK

You both jumped, not able to go far in the driver’s seat on top of Hoseok after accidentally honking his car horn. You take a moment to look at the position your in and clasp your hand over your mouth, "I did it again!" You whined, muffled by your palm, "What's wrong with me, I get I'm horny but AH!" You groaned from frustration, both sexually and emotionally. 

"Calm down, it's better than okay." The man beneath you strokes your hip soothingly, "I enjoyed it, and if Kook did any of that, he did too." He reassures you, "It's just some consensual kissing, we're all adults, it's okay."

You frown, "But you guys don't need me throwing myself onto you, that's not fair to you." It’s made people recoil from you, you want to say. You don’t want them to recoil from you, you couldn’t take it.

"Arguably, I do need you, in particular, throwing yourself onto me." Hoseok quipped and you rolled your eyes.

"Ha, Ha, very funny, but come on." You deadpan and it only makes him more confused. You don't know how to explain that the odds of a guy like him, or any of them, wanting you, specifically, and not just wanting affection are slim to none in your eyes, judging from past experience alone.

"What?" He asks and you shake your head.

"Ah, forget it." You shrug, "Nothing to fuss about, but sorry I nearly came in your lap-"

"Please do not apologize for something I wanted, almost happening." He groaned and you chuckled, shaking your head, genuinely not believing him, “In fact, I invite you to please hop back on.” He chuckled a bit, so you figured it was a joke. Surely he would be joking about wanting you sexually. 

"You're a funny guy, Hobi." You open the door and hop out, "Well I'm gonna go masturbate or something, and then maybe we can regroup for some lunch when I'm done?" You glance up at the flabbergasted man who nods numbly, too perplexed to even offer his services, "Okay, well thank you for the kiss and what not, the affection is always welcome!" You chirped, "I can give you kisses on the lips more often if you want like I do with Jin and Yoongi?" He nods again and you smile. You give him a chaste kiss on the lips before heading inside.

Hoseok blew out a breath as he sat in his car with a hard on. So the issue wasn't you not being attracted to them. The issue was you not believing they would be attracted to you. Somehow, that was harder for him to dissect, unsure how to prove that he would give you the world if you just mentioned an interest in having it. Not just him, but six other men. To you, kissing or sexual acts wasn't proof that he was attracted to you for being you instead of just another body. They all had to somehow prove you weren't being kissed because of convenience, but desire. All of them were too emotionally stunted up until now to already know how. Yoongi was right, this would be a lot of work. Work they all were willing to do.

Tip Jar

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

hehe glad i could make you laugh, oooh that sounds awesome! yeah id love to be tagged it sounds great :)

YES the differences are so fucking weird. like, they do know they're the same age right? i feel like its just an exagguration of how much the persons role in the group matters, like we see chan being held up as such a mature, old leader while jungkook who is literally the same age, is still babied etc. like enha hyung line is basically the same age (if a bit younger) as chenle and jisung but somehow the rules are different?? as you point out, still legal but still bizarre. hehe yeah, i mean where else are we going to rant? quora lol. mmm, hopefully more people can just write less smut abt people who are barely adults

ah, no prob it didnt take long. yeah i think thats right (i keep forgetting you know my url lol) mmhmm :( i think if that happened irl there would be some major trauma going on. knock wood it never happens to you or me lol (/hj)

hehe same! oooh glad Redemption For Cheese was realised! yess we cant rllycomplain that theyve written/produced too much good music lol. yeah, ive dragged him into being a stay so *dusts hands off* mission accomplished. mmm yeah, they tend to have a certain vibe but tbh it couldve worked if they were any other group but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ahh ur one step ahead of me on the stages of listening to ssick i think, still not convinced but thats okay! hehe, it had to be said. yesss the itch in the back of my brain is very satisfied by sorry i love you, felixs vocals deserve to be appreciated! (side note i feel like hes trying to sing more like his speaking voice, sorta husky, but tbh i wouldnt be mad if he sang like in glow, his sweet honey vocals made my life lol. but i think ive heard him say he doesnt like singing like that cos it makes his normal voice less husky, so what can you do)

> YES SOMEONE SAID IT. seungmin rap KING, he sped thru that rap like it was nothing, he deserves more rap lines. i do like how they gave minho some melodic rap lines this comeback, my guy deserved to show off those skills that made him not be eliminated (flashbacks to stay collectively wanting to murder jyp) and we already know changbin can sing, my man murdered masked singer. hyunjin can obviously sing as can jisung and felix, and i want to hear chan rap more! i feel like he started as part of 3racha (as a rap unit not producing) and then just became a vocalist (which im fine with, but it could be nice to hear him flex his rapping skills) and was partially replaced by hyunjin. anywayyy

back to album talk. lmaooo sad music to twerk to PERFECTLY describes silent cry. yes secret secret is and will always be, a masterpiece. hehe glad i could make you laugh :) i just felt like they have similar vibes. putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised. oh my beloved track, red lights. ahh thats okay, we can have different opinions, but by god the lyrics are *chefs kiss*. *banging on table* TWISTED AU TWISTED AU TWISTED AU. yess id love to see ur take on it! sdfghjkl it would have been glorious

no no! not stupid, just able to predict my brainwaves. ooooh thats so cool! makes me want to go there (wherever there is lol) yeah the waves are pretty good here, but none of my familys a surfer, so we dont rlly enjoy the full potential lol. YES moving on to gone away, it is indeed a heartwrenching track, but the vocals and the bloody key change? makes me want to brave being sad just to listen to it. mmm yeah, good point :( i feel like ive just gotten used to overthinking so much so that it doesnt matter what mood im in, ill do it anyway, so might as well just do what i feel like doing anyway.

yeah i think ur right! it is quite comforting knowing that all the tracks will get the love they deserve. i feel like also people assume kpop is just one genre which is utter bs. there are so many different vibes and feels and songs, i couldnt get into kpop (of which i thought only the bright cheerful present day bts stuff existed smh) until i heard gods menu so... idk where i was going with this but yeah. :)

YES FUCK YG, theyre literally on the brink of being kicked out of the big three and they are holding their salvation hostage without letting them do ANYTHING. idek what thought process goes thru their minds but arghhh its so infuriating. yess lisa's cb will be awesome but ot4 is the gold standard here.

hehe, glad u could get to this point. no no! u dont sound like a cult member at all lol yeah, i loooove some of their songs but the whole 23 members thing is getting to me. thats prob a common problem with nctzens but what can i say? im a simple girl with a limit to how many korean boys i can give my money to. atm im just trying to get into ateez and finish memorising enhypen's faces. also kard is kinda sucking me into their fandom atm, as well as eric name lol. ah what can you do? ooh thats good!

hehe i love it too! its exactly like online penpals, that was rlly well put. aww ty! hmm im okay, recovering from a bad case of rsv so thats fun. im doing okay mentally, starting therapy soon (after having to convince my mother that its not just smth i can brush off). physically i wont go into, basically i should be doing stretches to help but they dont completely fix it so my lazy ass doesnt do them, plus i got told recently im going to be stuck with this condition for the rest of my life so thats fun! ah, before you type smth dw abt me ill be fine. the weather atm is cloudy but warm, its been raining on and off today which is good for the garden. uhh i just finished reading sunburnt veils and im in the middle of prom theory which is rlly good. ummm ive got a concert tonight? that i may or may not be able to sing in (bc of the whole rsv thingo) and uhhhh idk. my dog is cute? im drinking tea rn? ive got a school dance coming up?

wbu? hows ur day going, how are you? whats the weather like on ur end? done anything interesting lately? found smth that makes you rlly happy? just any random thing youve been dying to tell someone?

no no! dont apologise, i love these exchanges. i think im happy to continue them for a long time :) on the other hand, if you get tired of them, feel free to just not answer at any time. goodness gracious this was a long ask haha hope it isnt too annoying

<3 w.a. 🐺

sorry it took me a bit to reply, i was fixing my theme ;n;

yeah, i figured it was because of the roles too. my friends and i still get taken aback when 3rd gen idols are the same age as 4th gen ones. in my head it doesn't add up sometimes. PLS THE RANT AT QUORA SKJDK tbh tho it's just going to be normalized as the years pass? esp that the boys are growing older and the amount of explicit fics will just increase. i might have to start blocking tags.

i had to look up the previous ask to remember what we were talking about xd i hope the events in champagne problems never happens to anyone. realistically, it probably happens a lot. damn i really won't wish that pain on anyone. dragging your brother into being a stay i whEEZED JFKSA additional noeasy music enthusiast o.o and ALL I CAN SAY WITH YOU GUSHING ABT FELIX IS AHA WHIPPEEEED OML can't blame you tho, i also want to hear felix sing more in other shades (if that makes sense HAHA) i really hope they'll do the role exchange in the next comeback :( or like in the near future bc i know they can do it :( the day i hear seungmin rapping it i will respectfully pass away. minho was given more lines this comeback thank fUCK i could rmb my irl being vocal abt her frustration. i don't get why minho barely has center time/lines in title tracks??? like the line distribution in the past eras just made me ???? if seventeen can balance lines with 13 members why cant a group of 8 do the same? moving on. i haven't watched the stray kids show simply bc i don't want to cry HAJS but i've seen clips. imagine if skz debuted without minho and felix?!?!? i rmb another irl catching bias feels towards changbin bc of the masked singer only to find out that the man's a rapper. i love how skz's vocals were highlighted this comeback :c there were a lot of mellow tracks! i find it cute when chan sings/raps bc it gets kinda obvious that he's a foreigner? the accent (im not even sure if it's the accent) it just shows. "putting off skz stuff bc of not having time to cry IS the kpop stan life summarised." CORRECT.

abt the twisted au o.O i'll inquire my irl if she wants to write it or not. if she doesn't want to, i'll do it. i miss writing twisted aus <3___<3 and i also miss going to the beach with my friends :' ) but it's starting to get cold here and i don't think i'll be able to enjoy the beach as much as i would if i went beaching in the summer. so maybe next summer? gone away really has an sm-ballad vibe. the thing about skz being a self-producing group, their songs don't sound like typical jype songs? and i just appreciate that bc in all honesty im not a fan of jyp groups at all. PLS the overthinking. i wish i could mute overthinking.

anyone who assumes kpop is just one genre obv hasn't listened to a single track. if kpop was just one genre why do i like some tracks more than the others??? oh you've only recently become a kpop stan? tbh im not a fan of the bright songs of bts either. i liked their older ones *chefs kiss* really matched high school vibes. yg has good artists and they're just wasting the talent ~.~ that strategy they have will get tiring eventually. people will stop waiting on blackpink and move on to newer more active groups ://

HAHAHAH yeah the 23 members is pretty overwhelming! it was the reason i didn't bother stanning before quarantine started. i don't regret stanning tho, met my ult bias in that group <3___<3 i don't really purchase albums unless i like the tracks xd ohhh getting into ateez just in time for the comeback! let me know what you think about them! i was fond of them at some point but grew out of it. good luck with memorizing enhypen! it took me a while to distinguish to people there XD i haven't checked out kard yet but chan plays their songs during lives and they're sexc hype music me likey *u*

i had to look up rsv im sorry. i'm glad you're recovering! please rest more and don't stress yourself out. bro i wish i could go to therapy too bc i have weird issues i can't justify and i need a professional to tell me what's the reason behind it. stuck with what condition btw? what happened? i'm sorry in case i just forgot. yesterday was a bit rainy for me too :(( it's not the type of rainy that makes me anxious so B) oh concert! good luck and i hope you'll be able to sing but i also don't think it's best for you rn :c what's your dog's breed? and yes i just finished drinking tea too. AAAAA i miss school dances :(( the last one i was supposed to have was cancelled bc of covid.

i was less productive today and i'm teetering between being mentally stable and becoming a hermit again. i'm anxious with a lot of things atm so like : D not the best state. today it was a bit sunny but not hot hot which was nice. i changed my theme today bc i couldn't wait for sept. 1st. and no i haven't found anything that makes me happy HAHAHA shit like that's hard to identify. don't have anything to say too, i'm just thinking about why i'm procrastinating too much atm T_T and i'm listening to this rap song atm and one of the rappers sounded like han.

it isn't annoying! i enjoy the long exchanges but i do admit it takes me awhile to type down a reply. so if i get more busy, it'll prolly take a bit longer for me to reply.

[miaxeu]

      though the mist might prevent some from seeing it, MIA STOEGER is actually a descendent of DIONYSUS. it’s still a question of whether or not the TWENTY-ONE year old MYTHOLOGICAL STUDIES MAJOR from LOS ANGELES, USA has taken after HER godly parent completely, but the demigod is still known to be quite CHARISMATIC & DUPLICITOUS. 

( y’all dont deserve this real messy intro but im workin w half a bwain cell at 4am so i beg thee 4 mercy. nywyy im the excited new girl who’s hella pumped to meet all ur charas : katya ! feel free to hop in my ims to plot or drop a like and i’ll hop in urs ! x  )

POWERS

natural acting abilities — her ma’s a hollywoo agent so she started actin real early & now shes a big shot actress. there r more deetz on her career below !

chlorokinesis — it wasnt as natural as acting n she only started working on it when she turned 13 n started going to camps. b4 she just noticed shes good w plants but it wasnt super crazy or nything. its p good now tho ! shes prioritizing vine binding and manipulation 4 the self defense bc awards r cool n all but they dont rlly protecc from monsters ykwim 

levitation — shes trying her best ur honor

alcokinesis  — she cant conjure it or anything, she’s just immune to it ffff

BIO POINTS — cw: drug use ( full biography here )

her mom raised her by herself bc dionysus the party god was out of the picture immediately. she never told mia she’s a demigod & it was always just “ wow ur so talented ” or “ aww u got a green thumb ! ” but when she saw him claim 13 y/o mia by placing a weird hologram over her head while she slept, she knew she had to spill da beanz & tell her kid

ofc mia thought her mom was jus playing sum weird acting exercise w her bc her powers r so lowkey she could highkey just be a Mortal but insert sad whistle, the realizashun & the claiming meant heightened monster threat !! so yea ,,, one ended up chasing her a couple days later rip 

aside from the trauma, mia was ok. mostly bc she ended up cryin for dionysus like any child would n lo & behold he came & helped !!! as he should. nywy she made sure to go to summer camps every year after that but mostly just for protection purposes

she lowkey rlly hates this whole god business esp now that shes grown lmfao deadass thinks she got a bad deal bc life threats arent sexy !!! went to eonia eventually bc its Too Much Man. she just wants to go back to work and her life w the mortals w/o worryin for her life. would deadass fade her father if she could. may or may not be majoring in greek mythology to figure out the logistics of it all out of spite, who knows !

PERSONALITY

not ! a Drama Queen  —  dont get me wrong, shes hella Extra in the way she moves n acts sorta like shes always bein captured on film. is quick-witted & playful & can be a huge tease/flirt if she feels like it, but miss her w Real Feelings ! totally not sentimental. srsly she will try to rationalize away everything and is just,.,., not good w it. so soz folks, we just keepin it breezy here

ugh, she’s an Actress — aka she can act like she cares tho ! shes very much into keeping ppl on her good side. shes friendly n palatable to everyone bc its how shes been trained & while it doesnt seem fake, its def diff when its genuine

The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known —  lemme circle back to the first one, ok so shes good w emotions but only in theory. does intense character work with her roles so she thinks that counts as her having eq when rlly shes just emotionally stunted, projecting n repressing like an idiot

blonde, skinny, rich, & a lil bit of a Bitch — shes only a bitch inwardly or to ppl she trusts enuff to let in on the gossip. if anyone full on opposes her or becomes real emotional, then this lil diva will rear its superiority complex head n snap a lil. will most probably do it v underhandedly n w a smile but it will be Brutal

girls just wanna have FUN ! — shes the child of da party god, so ofc she a true party girl. officially off the rails when she parties. inhibitions ? we dk her. can be insensitive in that case bc smtms its truly no strings attached, tis all abt the fun. likes company a lot & it doesnt even have 2 be loud or particularly abt her, she just likes having people around n the escapism of it all. will make friends with everyone n make sure they have a jolly fun time guaranteed at dionysus parties 

Work Hard, Play Hard — real responsible when it comes to work and commitments and if she trusts/likes u enough, she’ll give it 2 u straight, no bs. def thinks Calling Out is an act of love but maybe does it a lil too harshly smtms. v much into efficiency, sentiments be damned. not the feely words type. will sit next to u or party w u or even pay 4 ur therapist if u need sum1 to talk to. she will Be There while u work thru it, so long as u dont expect her to change n be all emotional n stuff

if she seems a lil contradictory thats bc she kinda is. tis the good ol nurture vs nature. her ma’s a real no nonsense chick n her pops is a frat guy drama geek greek god whos rlly into cottagecore so u get this lil blonde bitch whos sorta teetering on the edges

OTHER INFO  — cw: drug use ( full headcanons here )

re her career, she achieved pegot status when she was 18 aka she truly b dat bitch. shes not super mainstream famous tho, more like indie sweetheart, film snobs/critics fave typa gal. if ya want a trajectory she started w baby commercials then a sitcom from 4-10 ( think modern fam’s lily ) then it was off to the big screen & the stage ! 

mia has a lil bit of a drug habit. its not abusive or dependent, but it is a staple whenever shes parties bc alcohol is useless 2 her. started a lil young too bc hollywoo. primarily uppers/hallucinogens. she smokes weed a lil more liberally but the rest is mostly just an on occasion thing ( which, ngl, is a still a lil problematic when u party a lot rip )

after she got claimed, mia ended up going to demigod camps in a lot of diff places n countries, depending on where production would take her. there was never an established place, more like wherever was nearest when they wrapped up shooting bc monsters afoot n wutnot  

she was always homeschooled but she still managed to go to a prom and homecoming bc party is life. that makes eonia uni p much her first chance at having a normal educational environment & experience and even then its anything but. still tho this is her moment !!! im lit rally begging her to get a personality that isnt her internally rolling her eyes going “ its not that deep ”

might put up a bio/stats page if im feelin sxc but i wud jus like the records to show that mia stoeger is a bi sxc babe bc me ? write a het ? no grassy ass.

POSSIBLE CONNECTIONS — cw: drug use ( full connections here )

omg danny devito i love ur work ! 

,,, p self explanatory sdkjfs sum1 who loves her work ! it can be lowkey/highkey fangirl to a civil admiration

OR alternatively, y/m can Not Be a fan of her work. they might think the storyline of the projects she takes on r too out of touch n highbrow yada yada yada, but yes, we love to see either of it ! 

summer camp sweetheart !  

someone she met when at camp when they were teens ? doesnt matter in what country/city, but mia was only visiting so it was truly a one summer romance typa thing. bc she was younger, im thinkin 13-17 or w/e she was probably sweeter n a lot more emotional then. was it either’s first puppy love ? first kiss ? first “ relationship ? ” idk, do yk ? truly, so many possibilities. nothin set in stone just hmu bub 

summer camp pals ! 

p much the same as above but make it Platonic

party buddies !

or druggie pals. either way works but she wud luv it if theyre both xoxo

friends w benefits !

most probably ( but not limited to ) sum1 she met at a party skdjhsjk is it exclusive ? is any1 starting to develop feelings ? im down 4 nthing n evrything

alexa play true friend by hannah montana !

give mia her college bestie ! her confidant who knows her feels and can call each other out viciously with no ounce of resentment. we stan the friendships !

omg i love ur skirt !

that is the ugliest effing skirt i've ever seen. lmao basically sum1 mia pretends to like or acts civil w but rlly ,,,, Cannot Stand for w/e rzn   

im p much braindead rn but those are just sum ideas !!! ofc the usual staples like the pals, enemies, wutnots are also v welcome we love to see it. if u also have a wc that u think mia would fit in, id luv to know more ! there are also a couple more detailed ones here, but pls feel free to shoot me a msg n we can get 2 plotting x 

( * wipes brow * how did i type so much n say so little rip. mia is also a completely new muse so pls b patient n if i fuq up from time to time, pretend u do not see >.< nywy thnx 4 readin, sweets ! feel free to hmu here or at discord if ya wanna <3333 )

FULL INFO  ||  EONIA TASKS 

[jordanpls]

╰☆╮— new york’s very own jordan lee was spotted on broadway street in valentino studded derby shoes. your resemblance to kim taehyung is unreal. according to tmz , you just had your twenty-fourth birthday bash . while living in nyc , you’ve been labeled as being withholding, but also a romantic. i guess being a cancer explains that . 3 things that would paint a better picture of you would be gucci slippers to match the belt, vodka that goes down easier than apologies, flip cup champion, tinted aviators & satin bandanas. ( i used my name and wealth to have someone unfairly expelled from school so i could be at the top of my class ) & ( cismale & he/him ) + ( kale, 20, she/her, est. ) —╰☆╮

jordan is his american name. his real name is chulsoo but his mom is the only one who calls him that, and she barely does it herself.

jordan was born into a pretty nice family. he has a little brother (four years younger) who will teased the HELL out of (he says it’s his right of passage). also has a little sister who is two years younger and as much as she annoyed the shit out of him (he will NEVER forgive her for breaking his gameboy) he is so protective of her now n loves her dearly. will still kick his younger brother tho. twice for good measures (confirm the kill)

his dad is the CEO of tech company in South Korea who moved to the US to oversee US operations (before Jordan was born), so he makes a pretty penny. growing up jordan didn’t see his dad much since he was constantly flying in and out of SK for business. He wanted Jordan to stay in the US for school though since it would aid in future franchising in the US bc Jordan is supposed to take over as heir of the company (whiiiich jordan doesnt really want to)

his mom is just kind of a beautiful trophy wife who bakes cakes and puts pies in the window sills. she isn’t fluent in english, so Jordan grew up speaking Korean at home, but damn she was pretty strict on them. especially since jordan was the eldest he was always expected to do more. basically: you’re fluent in english and korean? it’s time to pick up japanese. you learned how to play piano? time to learn violin. you’re in school? you better be at the top of your class. you’re going to college? it better be an Ivy League. 

his mom wanted a child to brag about to her friends back home, and their logic was that if he can be a jack of all trades he could be a successful heir 

which, true, i guess. but jordan just felt like he was never good enough. he was good at a lot of things, but he felt so mediocre still. 

also lowkey just wants to make art n chill in museums for the rest of his life

besides, he’s basically forgotten all of the japanese he learned bc he never had a chance to use it and keep up with it. hasn’t touched the violin in years so barely remembers that. he can still ballroom dance tho so if you need a wedding date.

but basically he felt a lot of pressure!! and so that’s where his secret comes in.. in high school he was in line to be salutatorian, but that was not going to cut it if he was going to get into Harvard (plus his parents would have been so disappointed), so he pursued some name dropping and bribery and got the rightful valedictorian exposed, therefore giving him the spot of number one.

he highkey regrets it but he knows he’d do it again. he feels like he has to.

he has a bit of a cold look to him. he has a resting bitch face and looks pretty intimidating if he isn’t smiling all doofy. he is just pretty good at hiding emotion, & you’ll probably never see him cry.

he’s just very withholding and unfathomable. he feels regret and remorse, and feels like he can’t complain, but that’s all he wants to do. so he feels trapped. trapped in mediocrity, trapped as a heir of a company he doesn’t really want, in wanting to be perfect, in regret. 

but he isn’t one to talk about it much. 

also highkey scared of his dad

mama’s boy for sure. she’s strict, sometimes a bit ruthless, but she loves her family deeply.

he’s a bit? selfish. a bit hypocritical.

often feels entitled, which messes with his morality. LET ME TELL YOU, the boy’s moral compass is a roulette wheel

he’s got good memes tho

he is resourceful! he has used tablespoon measurers as spoons bc he was too lazy to wash the dishes before. is that resourceful? or just embarrassing? idk

will never use 2-in-1 shampoo

loves gucci

wears headbands & bandanas a lot 

basically dresses like taehyung bc he’s extra

grew a huge following on instagram (it just kinda happened??) mostly just girls who thinks he’s cute and fashionable lol. he does some sponsorships on it but mostly just likes the attention

some connections i’d love (some of these can be combined!):

best friend

ex-best friends

someone who he opens up to and is emotionally vulnerable with about his struggles and self doubt

enemies (maybe the person he got expelled? maybe some he shares an ex with or smth? something with blackmail? backstabber? jealousy?)

people he knew at Harvard

competitive relationship. always trying to one up each other. maybe fight

side flings/hook ups

idk i love anything slowburn. or love triangles. or in love w/ each other but avoiding it. 

maybe relationships before college and when he came back it was hard returning to normalcy? like maybe they didn’t want him to go, maybe he treated them different when he came back, idk

exes

on and off again relationship. they keep one of his gucci rings :’) LMAO

drinking buddy/party friend

idk anything rlly just like/message me n we can work smth out xx

[abbeyfangirl]

dragon age: all characters (companions)

I’ve been in this fandom for a hot minute now and I want to update my opinions on characters :)

Origins

Alistair: super sweet dude who literally is not the stereotypicalchantryguyfightme. He’s a great example of healthy masculinity and I totally wish he was bi because I have an entire essay on that— also: he’s a poc! His mum was brown. In game he’s got dark features. if you really want a blond/blue-eyes/white guy, make your warden that. or accept that brown people can be noble and moral. or just draw cailan, idk. just because BioWare whitewashes doesn’t mean you should.

Leliana: someone hug my singing girlfriend before I crush her under with my own hugs. Also: nugs. Yes! Shoes. Yes! She likes how I style my hair? YES!! I honestly think she’s super duper and it pisses me off whenever someone’s like: yeah she enjoys killing people and the Game. ok. and michel de chevin willingly participated in genocidal marches through the alienage he grew up in with his elvhen mum. 

Morrigan: dirty swamp witch that i stan and also have a v big crush on. tiddies. Have a son with a GW so we can raise him with our tiddies out in the forest. she’s also white-passing, as her father was chasind and all people we’ve seen that are chasind are black. therefore, she is biracial. therefore, poc can be goths and don’t shy away from giving morrigan a darker skintone. if the devs had of been thinking, she’d have a darker skintone.

Zevran: Actually is the best romance, I think. Loves consent, therefore I will stan him so hard my skull cracks a little. Also: he is a very brown boy and if he’s white in da4 I’m seriously going to throw all canon out the fucking window. genuinely a good person who needs to be told so. 

Wynne: grandma who only likes my friends who go to church. but also super sweet and I’d rest my head on her bosom (in a platonic way omg ZEVRAN)

Sten: angry quiet boi. the bestest boi. I totally would give him a kitten for a gift and bake him cookies. Thicc softie. I think if I had DA:O and i knew how to use mods i would mod the fuck outta him. sorry.

Sha(y)le: who’s gender? idk her. See also: fuck birds and authority. pound ur ass into the ground you feathery meatbag little shits. fuck songbirds.

Dog: such a good boi. thicc. thinks Alistair is a whiny fuck and is Morrigan’s only friend. love him. he’s the cutest companion. bet.

Ohgren: honestly forgot about him bcc he’s such a shitbag. also: he could’ve been a really cool addiction recovery type but NOPE. probably would have a trump shirt in a modern au and would catcall wlw and hit mlm. no thanks.

Awakening

Anders: he acts like rlly straight but he’s so gay I can smell it. also he’s rlly cute and fun and I love him so much.

Justice: MAYBE i’M selF CONSCious OF THE twitchING. is the friend that genuinely doesn’t get dick jokes but is ur 110% ride or die.

Nathaniel Howe: honestly is sort of a white knight/neck beard a little, but it’s kind of charming with his whole velanna m’lady?? grump boi. annoying soul patch that I’d mod out SO FAST—

Sigrun: would have ROMANCED the FUCK out of her. why she even entertains the idea of fucking with ohgren makes me realize most of the writers are dumbfucks.png. peppy little emo. 12/10 would die if she kissed my cheek teasingly.

Ohgren: why. why. why. I’d have brought Shayle over. Maybe Zev? Definitely Dog.

Velanna: she was written to be an annoying feminist and you can tell but I deadass am a kindred spirit with her bcc I too am deadpan annoyed with Thedas’ general population too. love her. Would’ve loved to romance her. She’d totally be one of those who’d get all tsundere and be like “n-no i hate you” *kisses the fuckin soul out of you then blushes so hard she’s now a tomato*

Dragon Age II

Anders: fuck the cops. i don’t care. fuck the cops. (vine reference). also: do i hate him for blowing up the chantry that would eventually annul a huge collection of his people? no. read dalishious’s meta on Anders. v intriguing. didn’t they retcon the fuck out of the reported deaths too? like there was like eight Templars and Elthinia in there. Templars killed more “abominations” in a day than Anders in the game canon—

Aveline: initially thought she was fine and then realized she’s shit to my lil brother and I will fucking clap her ginger ass. See also: whorephobia isn’t a joke so fuck off with treating Isabela badly, you tit.

Bethany: sunshine. Literal sunshine. I feel my freckles grow in her presence and i love it. she’s my little baby sister and I’d slam that ogre so fuckin hard before it touched either twin.

Carver: there has to be a mod where both twins survive. I love them both to bits. My babies. carver is my bitter, angry little brother and I can relate because I too am very angry and would totally clap my own ass. hes so genuine and I don’t get the competition between Beth and Carver. Like, both are fuckin stellar in different ways. In this essay I will—

Fenris: honestly, I don’t get the general hate between him and Anders. Fenris’ main arc should’ve been a recovery arc, not drunken moping and revenge. he deserves better. give him a soft sweater instead of his spikes and let him love himself as much as I love him for MAKERS SAKE. like when you really think about their relationship, it could’ve been an eye-opener for fenris and finally some legit sympathy for anders. but we all know that if they had of teamed up that Meredith would’ve been dead before the end of Act 1 so.

Isabela: whorephobia is not a joke. oversexualizing your only appearing brown woman is so poorly written. how about we appreciate her and her lovely bosoms but also let people tease her about her heart of gold? her innate understanding of freedom? instead of just a wave of dick? please?? can we give her some pants for when she fights? can we accept that i fall for rogues who hate themselves?? fuck. also whomever draws her x femHawke x Merrill literally is after my own heart.

Merrill: my fucking babygirl MARRY ME. Fenris could’ve been her older brother type, but NO. she and Isabela should’ve been canonical gfs instead of Isabela/Fenris (no shaming the pairing tho!!). I love how she’s written as neurodivergent. V nice. Sometimes I just look her up and cry because she’s fucking everything. Also: she’s in the Dalish origin and she’s far from being white. Why did they make the most innocent/naïve character really white? hmmmm.

Sebastian: whew that boy. Would totally be that annoying Mormon at your door but you still let him in bcc he’s super sweet. Also: huge ass bible thumper and should get his head slap because you said the maker loved all his children why do you defend a complicit old hag you annoying attractive fuck—

Varric: totally is a bard and the devs couldn’t handle the idea of him being one bcc it might make him look less straight. is the only grey morality person I don’t want to fucking bash in with a fry pan. he sees people and I like that, but you totally know he’s siding with mages every time bcc him and Anders are like besties. I’m sorry. I don’t make the rules. “Professional Younger Brother”.

Tallis: I know nothing about her but she seems okay. I think she was an escaped slave and honestly? Fucking props. Spy on a shitting organization, idk what you’re doing, but your VA was that cool lesbian from SPN so I think ur okay?

Inquisition

Blackwall: Redemption Arc 101. Love him to bits. Sad dad bunwall. good man. actually atoned for his sins by actively becoming a good person. his initial design is 80% hotter im so sorry but so not.

Cassandra: was way browner in the last game. would romance the fuck outta her. I love me a butch lady who melts at my dorky recitation of poetry. BioWare is a coward. also is the worst choice for divine. but not a bad person. could use some more guidance or get her ass whipped by a dalish elf about religion or a circle mage kid whos like “yeah bud i didn’t ask for the templars to whip my ass everyday for existing.”

The Iron Bull: I think the Qunari/Vashoth were a little based off black people (the whole anti blackness thing where ppl are scared of them bcc of whatever reason) and it pisses me off that he had a weird ass dubcon thing with Dorian in banter. It doesn’t make sense— he’s an A+++ dom and would not jump straight in role play without at least checking in at first like wtf BioWare.

Cole: his mother was chasind so he’s like not supposed to be that white? or like biracial? albino? idk. love him to bits tho. He’s neurodivergent and I deadass love him. romancing him? idk. I see why ppl think it’s fuckin nasty but also like as a writer I’d age him the fuck up so fast before my inquisitor even THOUGHT about that. like idk. I’m down with him being a sweet little bro character tho. he’s a babe. love him.

Sera: had the worst fucking writer I’ve ever seen and I willingly read the twilight saga twice by a shit ass racist white lady who okay’d pedophilia. like. Fuck you Kristjanson suck your own dick you fuck. had the worst options in regards to speak to her. has a thicc case of internalized racism that literally most of the fandom just loves to use against her. my lesbian neurodivergent queen. Would write a thousand fix it fics for her. Love her to bits. im gay.

Varric: I haven’t played DA2 so i don’t get why everyone wants to romance him but like. a dwarf romance? yes please. Idk he reminds me of my uncle so I only see him as fun uncle material. Deadass should adopt Cole and Merrill and co parent with Blackwall for Sera. dads? fuck yeah. love me some wholesome, present fathers.

Dorian: is a gay stereotype that I love/hate so much. and he’s also just as bad about being a creep bcc he sexualizes qunari men (in banter). I attribute that to shit writing tho. I want to protect him from all the “omg gay best friend!” people. he’d clearly be that tired gay that wouldn’t give a diddly damn about ur het romance. wanna talk about politics? he’s ur guy/gay.

Solas: “me, an intellectual:”. I don’t hate him, but I’m not about him. He comes off as mysterious and suave (which he totally is) but I deadass would not save him from himself because he’s a racist, exclusionist eggshell. idk. not my cup of tea, but I can totally see the appeal. And he’s interesting, I’ll totally say that. “I think the Dalish are garbage but they made you” is not a compliment. it’s so offensive. and such bait for “quirky girls” which I’m no fan of. Would be Achilles and let Patroclus (Lavellan in his case) die before he realized how his pride is literally a waste of time. If he gets a redemption arc I hope Lavellan gets to slap him before getting him to teach all about ancient Arlathan and show that the Evanuris weren’t all total dicknozzles. (Aka I really have a hard time believing that they’d be slavery cult things. especially since they’ve compared elves to indigenous ppl, Jews and the Romani.)

Vivienne: it’s so racist that they’d make a black woman be pro-slavery. That’s such internalized racism. She could’ve been the cool ass “educate yourself first before you speak, fool” ice lady, but NO. the devs could’ve kept the “Templars are a tool that I proudly can mandate” and the “circles are very good education” and we. Could. Have. Romanced. Her. Like. Fuck. Sake. I just wanna give her a hug and say “love yourself omg!!” and not even in a romantic way. Also: she and morrigan should not have been so antagonistic towards each other. I’d expect them to have great respect for each other, as they both moved up in the world through hardwork and very little help. They could learn different magic from each other too and still maintain that rival respect “oh you” mood. Sidenote: probably the cooler option for Divine. if her approval is high enough she’ll love and be loyal to you forever and i can’t see her agenda being bad. she improves the circles exponentially and tells all the antis to suck her pretty painted toes.

Josephine: an actual disney princess. romanced her my first playthrough. I love her so much. she just makes me so happy. And she’s like: “Integrity, Loyalty, peace. That is what it means to be a GREY WARDEN good fucking person.” she’s the person who would let you hold her hand if you got anxious and she’d be that person who shouldered the whole group project with finesse and poise and would probably lie for everyone as to not be mean. i love josie. her and leliana’s relationship is so cute, too. whether it’s romantic or not: women supporting women.

Leliana: if you leave her hardened you must hate her. why. she becomes so against herself. i like how shes feminine and lighthearted because that’s so powerful-- to remain hopeful when the world is hopeless. (its hard to know when to soften her/harden her so i get it but. google it. she deserves to be happy and sweet again.)

Cullen: uwu war criminal with shit ass “redemption arc” that was actually a half-assed (at BEST) recovery arc. Recovery isn’t linear, it isn’t pretty, and even the broken need to be told they are wrong in order to heal right. Like I’m offended by that bullshit. I’ve had to do some mental health recovery in the past and unlearning lots of toxic ideologies— which I’m still unlearning— and it bothers me that he gets an easy pass because he’s hot. It’s one thing if you like Cullen, it’s another thing if you hold him accountable.

[slcters]

 「 avan jogia. cismale. he/him. 」i hope that #lexsquad member「 SLATER MALIH SAVALIA 」adds me to the squad ! the 「 TWENTY THREE 」year old 「 LAW 」 major has been apart of the squad since 「 OCTOBER 2018」and seems to be the 「 DELPHIC 」of the group.「 SLATER」is a「 SENIOR」 and seems to enjoy 「 WRITING & PLAYING MUSIC 」but you can always find them at a squad party , too !

TW:  CHEATING, ABANDONMENT, PORN MENTION, DEATH, DRUGS

Anyways lemme give you some info about my man and try to keep it as short ( I lied ) as possible I’ll have some wanted connections at the end so hit me up to plot cause I live for that :) 

NAME: SLATER MALIH SAVALIA AGE: 23 MAJOR: PRE- LAW SENIOR @ LEX POSITION: A DADDY HOBBIES: givin 0 Fucks, living life to the full, writing, being an PI on his dad, spiting his family n causing problems as a FUCK U. BORN: LONDON, ENGLAND. SEXUALITY: A truE WILD BISEXUAL :”)

BACKGROUND: 

So Slater was born in London, England however when he was younger he moved around a lot with his parents until they settled in LA. Mainly for his dads business and his mum had previously lived there too.

His mum was a travel writer which explains why they traveled a lot, his father runs a few escort agencies + brothels ( nevada only we do it legal here )  and also started up his own pornographic production company / film studio in LA. it would probably now be one of the biggest in the world.  ( think vivid entertainment meets brazzers ) u know FILTHY RICH SHIT.

Both his parents were obviously away quite a lot, his dad ran so many businesses and hmm was hands-on lets say but the household was pretty calm when he was fairly young. his mum was super attentive and loving and just such an amazing role model and always wanted to take him with her to show him the world when she had to leave. i think he definitely was a mummas boy.

at about 8/9 however would’ve been when things kind of came crashing down for him. he really caught his dad cheating on his mum w/ one of the porn stars he hired from the studio. His dad would’ve really asked him NOT to tell him mum because it would break their family up. obviously, slater was like terrified of the chance of losing his family so he just pretended nothing ever happened.

he was so conflicted because he was keeping this huge secret and he had so much guilt but he didn’t wanna be the one to ruin things. Like his dad basically used him as a cover like expecting him to lie for him for a long time. it would’ve really eaten away at him. like it would’ve not been a one-time thing, but slater was in denial for sure.

i think one day slater would’ve slipped up in one of his lies for his dad and his mum ended up fighting out what happened and it was such a mess. it would've led to their divorce and god that was.. SOO messy. they defs didnt have a prenup and like the custody.

I think lowkey he was miserable being with his dad, he had so much resentment and sadness there. he would’ve been okay being with his mum the whole time.

His dad was really the type of parent that would use his kids against each his ex wife like they would use slater to pass on messages and being like no u can’t have him for that day etc etc And not taken slater into consideration.

his dad though really tried his absolute best to bring his mum down which was sooo sad to see, like watching her get put through the ringer by his dad and she just became a bit of a shell of who she was, because he obviously had more than enough money to do it and didn’t want her to see a dime of it even tho he.. RLLY BE LIVING THE HIGH LIFE.

slater would’ve just been back and forth between them both up until he was about 15 when his mum, unfortunately, passed away due to drugs. which was SO UNEXPECTED.  i think there was definitely a lot more to it, like she definitely was self-medicating to help go through the still pending divorce. which would’ve lasted years. 

anyways losing his mum devastated slater because truly she was like a best friend to him, she was. he always enjoyed the weeks at his mums more than his dad and now he knew he’d be stuck there.

he fights a lot with his dad still about everything that happened and what he did, he blames him for it and putting a LITERAL KID in the middle.

anyways though since the separation his dad had like a myriad of “ girlfriends” around who were probably all young enough to be like a step sibling tbh. he never took to any of them until his stepmom. who shockingly he actually really likes. shes one thing keeping his family together atm.

 Anyways as you can imagine slaters dads business was huge and his dad is truly raking in the money but slater has always felt uncomfortable spending or even benefiting off it which is why he’s extremely secretive considering he knows where it comes from and he doesn’t exactly support his dad let alone he doesn’t want to have to explain that to people and get them looking into his family.

his father has really tried and put up this front though as if he’s a huge family man now and is conservative and super religious and smh that pissed off slater to the max. he’s like that dont make no fucking sense..

 when he high school hit though they were going to country clubs all that shit slater hated basically. he truly didn’t mind acting out just to spite his dad knowing hey your a family man what are you gonna do about it??

this drove his dad so crazy and only meant more rules were put on him, it was about the only attention his dad gave him.

when hey fight though its really wild, you know slater throws it in his dads face basically just some fucking pimp and exploits people and he’s never gonna do that and he’d rather have nothing than follow in his footsteps

i think his dad has been fined multiple times for some shady shit going on in his businesses. plus its been common knowledge in the depths of the industry they heavily provide them w/ alcohol drugs etc. probably has had an issue with the treatment of the people hes hired. lawsuits.  there's more under the surface that even slater doesnt know.

there would’ve been a bit of a scandal where his dad employed one of his dumbass country club friends daughters aka someone even slater knew to star in one of his adult films

 but regardless like he knew he really was fortunate he lived an extremely privileged life, like he would be set for life, could sit do nothing and its good. he just never had a huge interest in it unlike his father who really always said that he would take over everything someday and it would turn into a huge family business. and he was like yikes someone come tell him.. no thanks. 

 His dad and him definitely had a rocky relationship after his moms death, he  didn’t parent very much and just left his stepmom in so many uncomfortable situations but honestly

 He saw her more as a friend though then a mum but she was the best parental figure he’s ever even had. She’d genuinely try so hard to make sure his dad was acting like one like telling him he’s going to his sons gigs or else even though slater knew his dad would come for 2 seconds to appease his wife then leave.

But growing up he’s always been super careful of who’s around him and who he lets into his life probably as a result of how secretive his family has always instilled in him to be.

 Like his dad keeps saying we’re family we come first, and he never wanted slater to be sharing that with people about what they did.

 But he has such a resentment to his dad, like he thinks he’s a mess he has a wife he doesn’t give a fuck about a son he doesn’t see, he does god knows what he just is so convinced he can’t turn out like him ever. 

I think people genuinely think he must not come from money because the amount of people who have ever met his parents or seen his house is a handful if that. 

Like he’s always hanging out at other people’s places and just he’s never been really extravagant unless its to purposely spite his dad yikes. that comes from anger.

Like he really got himself a job even though his dad said he could come work for him just cause he was like yeah I don’t want to run ur dumb company and make money off it u pos? 

His dad has definitely been investigated a few times for shady practices. slater definitely started looking into law for that reason, like he genuinely thought he wants to actually be able to put guys who screw the system and own huge corporations and think they can pay outta anything in jail.

meanwhile his dad thought great a lawyer who can defend our family business smh so he supports him He has no clue slater would rather take him down.

hes on the dl investigating his dad himself. who wanna help.

PERSONALITY

losing his mom AND one his best friends showed him that he needs to really do everything he wants to and in that moment which does make him selfish at times 

i think he has abandonment issues, i think like when  his best friend who was kinda the reason he came to lex, happened to pass away also triggered that again ( TBD WHY im leaving this open for plots ) and that really shook him all over.

he really almost feels cursed at this stage.

he was pretty sheltered tbh because his dad wasn’t trusting AT ALL and at first was homeschooled until High school so he didn’t exactly grow up outgoing or being able to have many people at his place or tell them about his life.

i think theres not many people who know he’s related to his dad business, even tho his dad business iS HUGE and legit is his last name. and hes like yeah ha coincidence right??? not my dad at all.

He’s super fucking blunt though like he may be secretive with his personal life but his ass does not hold back which has gotten him into way too many problems. 

He just feels like he grew up lying about so much, his dad was like we don't want people taking advantage of you if they find out who you are and use things against me.

 he hated that and all the secrets about his dad he kept so don’t expect him to hold back on feelings or thoughts back at all 

LOVES to spite and piss his dad off even if that means 30+ students at his dads place during a business meeting lets do it.

He acts a lot without thinking like he sucks at planning anything and a lot of time he seems a little flighty and that he doesn’t take things serious enough esp his relationships

.He’d really go above and beyond though for anyone who’s proven to him that they can be trusted like he’s been known to be all in he either gives it everything or nothing so he goes extravagant

will try everything once.

wild child tm.

 his ass was kinda like living it up. he’s like on the brink of i dont want to just use my dads money but he’s like if i am though i wanna use it to actually do something decent, like get a law degree and be something, travel like his mum did. hes obsessed with the thought of like following in her footsteps BUT HE. NEVER ADMITS IT.

feelings who are u?

 He’s definitely a realist and a little bit cynical too, like he’s seen way too much shit to really have some ideal look on life. 

He doesn’t believe in some fairytale or things just happen for a reason or really in fate or anything like that. 

Like he doesn’t think love fixes everything and someone can be your happiness at all . hes like clearly its only problems so.

He’s only ever really had one serious relationship and a bunch of other casual things but that was just nothing to him

 He’s not closed off to them but he picks and chooses what he gives, but he’s just doubtful how someone’s gonna mix well into his life 

He definitely seems aloof and a bit cold but I mean after a drink and 5 minutes he’ll be picking your brain on just about anything 

loves writing in general, usually lyrics and music though.

secretly Loves a good midnight dnm overlooking the water with a trusted friend

 Awesome at getting himself out of situations he can be pretty convincing lbr

lowkey has abandonment issues. 

connections: donnt say im trash i know.

extra drama - his STEP sibling. aka child of his step mom. 

his best friends sibling, aka the one who passed away :”(

someone whose mum dated his dad WILD.

A TABOO FLING OR CRUSH, basically he got with someone he shouldn’t of, we can decide reasons HOWEVER I’D LOVE if the other chara was the ex of his friend who passed away. HED FEEL LIKE SHIT for having feelings. the angst. and the we cant do this its wrong.

I mean... someone who actually WORKS FOR HIS DAD. i would die, could be an escort, a sex worker, someone who is signed to his dads production company, can be a pornstar or more like a cam star too.

someone who is a huge tease and rlly makes his ass beg to be with them. make him work for it honey.

ooo a really GOOOOD friend and they’ve always been “ platonic” but theres this weird sexual tension and they both know it, but like ooo it could risk the frienndship n makee it weird and like ugh.

like someone whose parents hates them hanging around w/ slater bc of his family, maybe bc they ran in the same circles from back home but they just.. cant stay away from each other.

someone hes kinda dated but they realised we’d be better off as friends even tho weve seenn each other naked, it was fun.

One of the people from back home that found out all about his entire family when the scandal was exposed. They could’ve been friends or enemies.

AN ex!! pls he defs has broken some hearts or THE ONE WHO BROKE HIS :) IF U DO THIS U WILL GET SO MUCH LOVE

An enemy Maybe someone against his family or someone he just can’t stand!

THE damn girl his fucking dad tried to employ to be in his damn movie! My ass would do wild shit for this one wild WILD SHIT.

unrequited love, someone's heart he broke without even realising it

A confidant someone he can really confide in tell-all his dumbass shit too, like his protective ass would really care for this person

Someone who’s into music as much as him pLS!! like someone who can just jam with him late nights

He needs that dnm kinda friend 😂

A fwb that’s self explanatory:)

RIDE OR DIES etc

CHILDHOOD FRIENDS.

ANYTHING IM SOOO OPEN FOR PLOTTING

[demiigcds]

            HOLA !! HOLA !! HOLA !!  ayyyy my dudes. it’s me sun & i live in the cst time zone. ( t e x a s bby )  tbh. can i just tell you all how much i already adore each and every one of u, bc i do.  I READ Y’ALLS INTROS BEFORE I EVEN JOINED IM SUPER EXCITED SRSLY. well let’s get this party started !! i’m introducing my three kids because idk what self-control is lol!!  i suck and like to live life on the edge/unprepared so be ready for sloppy pages and a rlly bad intro.. like this and i’ll go to your messages to spam u with love. THANKS. 

CHOI HYUNJAE

[ NAM JOOHYUK, HE/HIM, CISMALE MUSE C] — [ CHOI HYUNJAE ] is a child of [ KRATOS ]with the power of [ ENHANCED STRENGTH ]. they’re [ TWENTY-FIVE ] and have been in nemean lion for [ TWELVE YEARS]. if you want to meet them, they’re usually around the building [ GOING ON MISSIONS AND EATING ]; you could also try [ TRAINING GROUND #1 ]

--- ABOUT/HISTORY.

jae is a super goofy guy who is pretty easy going (if your muse has been around for a while hmu !!)

if he isn’t on a mission it is likely he is either training other demigods @ training ground #1 or just around the building eating somewhere. he never gets full he can honestly just keep eating if you let him and his metabolism is ridiculous 

jae comes off as the stereotypical dumb jock, but he is super smart when you actually sit down and talk to him

pls someone talk nerdy to him he will love you

honestly kinda wanted to be a teacher, but he doubts his own intelligence, so he decided to do what he does best and train the newer and younger demigods. he didn’t think he was smart enough to teach the kids :’(((

very competitive whether it's sports, training, or even just a game of monopoly. ( he becomes another person) 

isn’t a hot head or anything but he is super strategic about EVERYTHING and really hates to lose. he goes from being a ray of sunshine to being uncomfortably quiet 

 recently he has been a little overprotective of his friends especially when going on missions considering the recent turn of events that have taken place

a gentle giant who is a little too strong for his own good

LEO

 [ KIM DOYOUNG, HE/HIM, CISMALE ] — [ LEO ] is a daemon of [ CIRCE ] with the power of [ ILLUSION MANIPULATION, REFLECTION, AND AWARENESS ]. they’ve been alive for [ FIVE HUNDRED AND TWENTY-SEVEN YEARS ]. if you want to meet them, they’re usually around [ THE LIBRARY ].

--- ABOUT

leo is a daemon of circe and when asked if he wanted to keep his memories or forget them he chose to remember. but BOY WAS THAT THE DUMBEST SHIT E V E R !!

leo was previously named  yi sejin, and was a scholar during the josen era, that’s probably why he is obsessed with the library. he had never seen so many books in his life he feels like he is in hEAVEN

 when he isn’t having to guard demigods during their missions that is where he is.

enjoys working under circe but hates having to watch over all these demigods, HONESTLY, LEO IS THE EMBODIMENT OF A GRUMPY OLD MAN

HE LISTENS TO OLD TRADITIONAL KOREAN MUSIC AND THINKS TODAYS BOPS ARE ABOMINATIONS TO MUSIC.

“ BACK IN MY DAY ... “

really bad at socializing and tbh he has two moods: (1) judging you, (2) awkward

tries to avoid the demigods unless he has work with them because he prefers not to interact with them.

he thinks 99.9% of them are too rowdy/annoying and would rather be reading in the library

SNARKY AND GRUMPY 24/7

hates everything and only KINDA likes his other daemons

loves coffee though. COFFEE AND BOOKS ARE THE ONLY THINGS KEEPING HIM GOING

SOPHIA PARK

[ PARK CHAEYOUNG ( ROSÉ ) , SHE/HER, CISFEMALE ] — [ SOPHIA PARK] is a child of [ APHRODITE ] with the power of [ CHARMSPEAK AND AMOKINESIS ]. they’re [ TWENTY-TWO ] and have been in nemean lion for [ FOUR MONTHS ]. if you want to meet them, they’re usually around the building [ STIRRING UP TROUBLE AND SOCIALIZING ]; you could also try [ THE LOUNGE ]

--- ABOUT/HISTORY

the daughter of a famous rockstar . 

she is an actress so sophia is pretty famous, but now more so for being a wild child rather than her actual talents

came to nl after causing some drama and her pr teams advised her to take a break from acting

luckily she has gone majority of her life without any monsters catching her scent and that is why she doesn’t take the missions or the monsters all that seriously.

sophia has been using her powers all her life as a way to get what she wants but she had no idea she was using them all along, she thought she was just great at being persuasive bUT NAH

is bored out of her mind at nl at the moment especially since she is used to being so busy with work sO SHE IS CAUSING TROUBLE LEFT AND RIGHT TO  KEEP HERSELF ENTERTAINED

flirty and playful she is interested in someone new almost every week and enjoys the idea of love until she is bored and is on to the next

always trying to catch the latest parties at the lounge, BECAUSE SHE IS THE LIFE OF THE PARTY OK

avoids training ; that’s gross and she isn’t willing to sweat ( unless the trainer is cute then maybe ) 

okay she is a mESS but if she actually enjoys ur presence she is RIDE OR DIE

like that person looked at you fUNNY??  THAT IS NOT OKAY SO HERE IS THE PLAN TO RUIN THEIR LIFE AS THEY   K  N  O  W   I  T 

is the best sugar buddy ok. that’s the only way she knows how to express her feelings. so if she actually likes you better be ready to be drowning in gifts and random offers of money

[kimjoongs-main]

first love! au - jaemin

↳ based off of this idea i had

↳ type: bullet scenario

↳ warning(s): n/a

↳ a/n: the amount of hw i could’ve finished instead of making this :’)

okay let’S GO

we all know how passionate is jaemin when it comes to volunteering and giving back to the community

so imagine him volunteering weekly at a daycare center near his neighborhood

he absolutely loves and adores all the children he meets and acts like a big brother figure to them

his reason for helping out in the daycare in the first place is that when he was younger, his mom would put him in a daycare and bc she had to work, and he remembers the older boys and girls who volunteered there when he was just a kid

he remembers how nice they were and the way they treated him, especially the boy who would always secretely give him a piece of candy every time he came in, and he remembers the sweet girl who would always boop his nose and ruffle his hair

jaemin wanted to reciprocate their love and affection to the kids at the daycare so that’s why when he first heard from renjun that they needed more people, jaemin jumped on that train so quick

now he’s been helping out at the daycare (w jeno, renjun, and hyuck as well) for about a year and a half

the kids absolutely admire him and would always cheer whenever they see jaemin walk in

the people who work at the daycare were very impressed at jaemin’s ability to memorize every single child’s face and name and even remember little things about them

and when a new child joins, jaemin easily makes them feel welcome by hovering around them and asking them to join in on games

he’ll tie back a little girl’s hair or give her a cute braid and he’ll give a little boy a piggyback ride around the center just to hear him laugh

also you better believe jaemin’s fiercely protective of these kids,,,like fiercely protective

one time a little girl named minji tripped and scraped her knee, she only let out one small cry and jaemin was already sprinting across the room, reaching little minji and scooping her up in his arms, gently tucking her head into his neck and quietly shushing her

he then proceeded to clean the scrape so it doesn’t get infected, all while carrying minji in his arms, and then after he read her a story to help her fall asleep soundly in his hold

renjun took a pic of this moment and jaemin loved it so much he made it his wallpaper

since jaemin’s super super good w the kids, the people at the daycare put him in charge of helping out the new volunteers and showing them how to do things

and that’s where you come in !! you’ve been desperately trying to find a place that takes volunteers bc you may or may not have made a stupid decision that almost got you suspended if it wasn’t for your parents pleading to the school to ease up the punishment

now instead of suspension, the school’s making you complete at least 200 hours of community service as a chance to “whip you into shape”

ofc you didn’t want to but it was better than getting suspended, so you reluctantly accepted the deal and now here you were, standing inside a daycare in front of a boy w peach pink hair and a smile too bright for your liking

“hi! you must be the new volunteer, my name’s jaemin and i’m in charge of helping you. nice to meet you!” he holds out his hand and you have to physically restrain yourself from flinching

you see, you weren’t the social type, the complete opposite actually, so you could already tell that this guy was someone you weren’t going to be all buddy buddy with

but you needed the hours so you just sucked it up and managed to send him your best smile and shook his hand

“nice to meet you too...i’m y/n” you replied quietly

right behind jaemin were three other boys who looked about the same age as him; one was currently painting a picture w a 4 year old girl, another was sitting on the floor w a group of kids and reading them a story, and the last one was running around the room chasing a little boy

jaemin looked over his shoulder to see what you were looking at and laughed “oh i should probably introduce you to everyone else. the one painting is renjun, the one on the floor is jeno, and the loud one is donghyuck”

you blinked at him as he gestured for you to follow him inside, which you did, but immediately regretted it when five children ran up to you and peered up at you curiously

they kept talking over each other, possibly trying to ask you a bunch of questions, and you felt overwhelmed

sensing your obvious discomfort, jaemin quickly moved over to stand next to you and clapped his hands, catching their attention

“okay kids that’s enough, y/n’s our newest helper so make be nice and welcoming okay? go on and play w the others, i’ll be right back”

and to your suprise, the kids responded back w a loud “yes nana” and left

jaemin looked at you sheepishly “sorry about that, they get really excited when a new person comes by since it’s usually us four that come in”

“it’s only the four of you volunteering here? i would’ve thought there’d be more”

jaemin sent you a sad smile as he showed you to the back room where he gestured for you to sit on the leather chair as he sat across from you

“i thought the same too, but whenever new people come they tend to leave pretty quickly after” “why?”

he sent you another sad smile “they find it difficult to take care of the kids. my friends and i are the ones who’ve volunteered the longest, so the center’s pretty grateful for us”

your heart aches slightly at the revelation and you peer out the door to look at the children, heart aching even more as you see them running around and laughing

“so, what brings you here?” jaemin asked, and you winced at the question, causing him to raise his eyebrows

“i..um...i made a really stupid decision..and my school’s making me do community service to make up for it.”

jaemin let out a soft oh and you mentally slap yourself; great, this guy probably thinks i’m a terrible person who’s only here bc i’m forced to, which technically isn’t a lie but—

“do you like kids, y/n?” jaemin’s next question interrupted your train of thought and you blink before it fully registered in your brain

“oh uh..yeah i do actually. i just..i’m not...very social..so i don’t know how to act around them yet.”

jaemin nodded his head at your answer, a serious look on his face, before he broke out into a soft smile and walked over to you, placing his hand gently on your shoulder

“well that’s good enough for me! listen, i know you probably think that i think you’re a bad person bc of the reason you’re here, but trust me when i say stuff like that doesn’t matter to me. just the fact that you came here instead of somewhere else says a lot. i’ll be here to help you out if you need it, so don’t worry y/n. i’ll make sure you not only complete your required hours, but that you also have fun doing it.”

jaemin grinned once more before he turned around and walked out “i’m gonna grab your uniform really quick, so stay put!”

you just sat there staring at the door in shock at what you just heard...it was the first time someone’s been that nice and nonjudgmental towards you

you glanced down at the comm. service log sheet in your hands and sighed “maybe....this won’t be so bad”

for the next few weeks, you and jaemin are practically glued to each other as he helps you get into the swing of things

as expected, you fumble a couple of times, but jaemin is always there to help you back up and even offers some advice so you don’t make the same mistake

since you two spend a lot of time together, it was inevitable that you two would grow close pretty quickly, and not just jaemin, but renjun, jeno, and donghyuck too

you sometimes found yourself being invited to hang out w them outside of the daycare and it’s so..refreshing to be around them

as the weeks pass, you also slowly become fond of the kids and vice versa; you’re especially fond of a little boy named juhyun who loves to hold your hand every chance he gets

and as jaemin watches you play w the kids, he can’t help but smile at how much more comfortable you’ve become, not just w him, his friends, or the kids, but w yourself too; he can tell you’re rlly enjoying your time here

and as you two spend more time together, and learn more things about each other, you two can’t deny the feelings brewing in the depths of your heart

jaemin’s kind, and self-less personality is what drew you to him and your willingness to learn and awkward, yet endearing nature is what drew jaemin to you

he was never rlly quite sure what his feelings for you were, until he witnessed something about you he’s never seen before

there was a new volunteer at the daycare and as usual jaemin was in charge of showing him around; you were playing w juhyun when jaemin left for a bit to grab the new guy’s uniform

at first everything was normal, but then you heard little areum start crying and your head whipped up so fast; areum was sitting next to a pile of toppled blocks and the new guy was standing next to her, glaring

“quit your crying, your block tower was in my way” his sharp tone caused areum to cry even louder

appalled, you stood up and made your way over to areum, carefully picking her up in your arms and tried to calm her down; you sent a glare to the new guy “what was that for? she’s just a little girl, you don’t have to be so rude”

the guy rolled his eyes “she’s annoying that’s what”

“if she’s so annoying then why don’t you leave? it’s obvious you don’t get along w kids so why are you even here?”

the guy stepped closer to you “you can’t tell me what to do”

“but i can” you breathed a sigh of relief at the sound of jaemin’s voice, and the guy whipped around

jaemin was standing there w a bright grin on his face, but the way he was clenching the uniform in his hands told you that he wasn’t actually happy

“here at the daycare, we put the well-being of the children as our first priority and ensure that they are safe and happy. however, since you’ve shown behavior that goes against that policy, i’m afraid i’m going to have to ask you to leave.”

the guy scoffed, but left w/o a word, knowing that this was a fight he couldn’t win

when jaemin came back, he saw you kneeling in front of areum, gently cradling her face and wiping away her tears, and he felt his heart clench tightly at the sight

the worry on your face and the way you held areum as if she were a fragile piece of glass solidified his feelings for you

however, he was still unsure of how to express those feelings to you

and unbeknownst to him, you felt the same exact way :’)

a few more months pass and one day jaemin decided to walk you home from the daycare

on your way there, he asks you the comm. service hours thing is going and you falter a bit, biting your bottom lip shyly

jaemin, as perceptive as ever, quickly notices and asks if you’re okay

you stop walking and sigh, looking up and locking eyes w him; your heart skips a beat when you take in his iridescent eyes, twinkling as they reflect the light of the moon, you could get lost in them forever

“jaemin, there’s something i need to tell you...” you pause and he nods, urging you to continue “my community service hours...i completed all 200 hours a few weeks ago”

his eyes widen in surprise “seriously?! wait, if that’s the case then you don’t have to volunteer at the daycare anymore right?” you nod your head slowly “......then, why?”

you take a deep breath as you force yourself to step closer to him; jaemin gulps when you do so, but doesn’t make any move to stop you

“well it’s simple, i’ve fallen in love” jaemin felt his heart stop and his breath caught in his throat

“i’ve fallen in love w the kids, they’re my absolute world now and i would do anything for them. i’ve fallen in love w the daycare, it’s my safe haven. i’ve fallen in love with little juhyun who keeps falling asleep on me. but most importantly...” you step closer “...i’ve fallen in love with you, na jaemin”

jaemin’s chest fills with so much happiness and adoration for you as your words register through his brain. his beautiful bright smile appeared on his face, and you can’t help but smile back

and that’s all it takes for jaemin to close the tiny gap btwn the two of you; he brings his hands up and gently cups your cheeks as his lips land softly on top of yours

the kiss is sweet and so jaemin-like that you feel your stomach doing all kinds of flips and tricks; you reach out and grab onto his jacket, tugging him closer to you as the kiss deepens

you two break apart when the need for air becomes apparent, but jaemin leans forward and rests his forehead against yours

“that’s funny, bc i’ve fallen in love with all of those things too” you start blushing “except for juhyun tho, that little guy needs to back off”

you giggle at the playful glare on his face and jaemin’s expression softens at the sound; he plants another kiss on your lips and...let’s just say your parents weren’t too happy when you came back home after the sun went down :’)

the next day, you and jaemin walked in the daycare hand-in-hand, receiving knowing looks from renjun and jeno, and a loud whoop from hyuck

and when the kids saw you and jaemin sneak in a quick kiss, chaos ensued

“jaemin and y/n sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g!” “jaemin just kissed y/n!!” “eww they’re kissing”

you just laugh and scold the kids for their teasing, and jaemin kisses you again for fun

[inkspvlled-blog]

( kristen stewart, twenty-seven, cisfemale ) by chance have you met TAYLOR FLEMING yet? i hear SHE has lived in CAPITOL HILL for THREE YEARS and works as a WRITER. i’m surprised you haven’t met them yet but for when you do, i hear they can be quite CALLOW but also BEGUILING. for whatever reason they remind me of OLD FLANNEL T-SHIRTS, WORN DOWN CHUCK TAYLORS & WEARING SUNGLASSES AT NIGHT.

folks!! *claps hands* i’m ron & i’m very glad to be here w all of u cool ppl. i’m 23, pronouns she/her & i live in the gmt -3 timezone. anyways, now that all that info is outta the way, i should probably tell y’all i’m a messy person who loves messy plots so yk, any plot??? we love that, we’ll stan it, we’ll spice it up. the Flavor, yk?? so okay, let me not ramble anymore and start talking abt taylor god why do i talk so much

first of all i just wanna say taylor is the human form of this vine and also her personality is just the real bros of simi valley although??? she was born and raised in new york but who the fuck knows ya know

there’s nothing particularly strange to taylor’s story, no batman-esque Origin, no tragedy other than being completely ordinary and feeling frustrated because yk, milennials rlly b out here thinking they are special

she has an older and a younger brother, which is why she’s not really a girly girl and learned how to throw a nice uppercut really early in life so her brothers would leave her the fuck alone

during high school she was def “not one of those girls” which quickly subsided into oh fuck i’m not one of those girls cause i’m fucking in love with those girls. or any girl. she’s fucking gay :/

that whole panic lasted a few days until she decided to come out and wow big fucking shocker her whole family was already sus so it was like, not a big deal? like ofc her dad took a while getting used to it but by now they are all settled n ready to go. and her mom confided in her that she had previously experimented w women which is not something sixteen year old taylor wanted to know but guess what??? she did anyways

definitely one of those moody teens who were like no one Understands my teenage angst and spent days shackled up in her room watching old movies and feeling so unique and special writing her poems and drawing on her sneakers and listening to all time low ya know

she also really liked skating and like, experimenting with drugs which is not something she does anymore but she really made a lot of dumb choices when she was a teen. not anymore though, she will indulge in the occasional mary jane, howmstever

due to believing she looked like a fucking alien during high school (which we know its not true), she developed a personality that’s very charming and agreeable with people because it was the only way she could approach girls

anyways, she eventually grew out of all that bUT the writing and refined her personality a little. she’s less of an obnoxious person and more of a dry humor but still v approachable kinda gal. she has only written one book so far and it’s surprisingly doing well?? though she def has room to improve

she went to nyu for english literature (cliche, i know) and during that time taylor really exceeded expectations with her essays and chronics and the polished but humorous kind of way she writes. sort of a tongue in cheek kinda thing where even her most difficult professors found charming yk

her move to seattle three years ago was due to a job offer for writing for the seattle times, and she writes little chronics every now and then while she’s working on what should be her next book but we don’t know if it will ever see the light of day

*claps hands* personality

has an emotional support succulent collection

can be kind of funny in a really silly way or be very sarcastic and there’s no in between

dude and bro are definitely endearment terms

has a hard time talking about her feelings and expectations bc most of the time she feels like fucking shit which, relatable

vapes a lot :////

flirty fun & fresh but don’t try to pin her down to commitment cause....... that’s not a can of worms we want to open today mi amigo

self sabotage galore!!!

sometimes dresses like a dad and she won’t realize it until she sees an elderly man wearing the same outfit minus the baseball cap

dogs??? we love them in this household

an asshole but a nice??? asshole?? ig

here’s her pinterest board

idk if this intro makes sense at all but i tried and that’s all we can do, isn’t it??? anyways, if you’d like to plot w this???? alien pls like this post or wish upon a star and i shall contact u

[boojersey]

VIC DO ALL THE ASKS BC I LOVE U AND WANT U TO HAVE FUN

*SWEATS* AYE AYE CAPN

cw for like some common lgbt+ topics such as dysphoria violence discrimination etc just. tread carefully if u get triggered easily by bad lgbt experiences

What do you identify as and what are your pronouns? -im a gay trans man and my pronouns are he/him but they/them is also acceptable!

How did you discover your sexuality, tell your story?-oh wow i originally thought i was a lesbian because i didnt even know what transgender was i just thought wishing i was a man meant i was butch and then i met my friend donnie in eighth grade who told me he was trans and it was kinda a huge slap in the face but with a sack of gay bricks? and i found out i dont like women through actually having sex with cis women and finally realizing it. really wasnt for me so now im just a gay man as opposed to queer as an umbrella term but i periodically refer to myself as such

Have you experienced being misgendered? What happened and how did you overcome it?-oh yea i literally was misgendered today i just kinda brush it off but it can be hard sometimes especially when people know im trans and do it

Who was the first person you told, how did they react?-i first told donnie about my gender, it was a thing where i went to bed the night i met him and was like  .. wait holy fuck and then the next day i was like BRO HOLY FUCK but sexuality? i dont really know???? it was so long ago it was honestly probably my group of friends on kik that i had in 2013 (u were included in that mister!!!!)

Describe what it was like coming out, what did you feel?-im not actually fully out but the first time someone who was an adult knew about my trans-ness was what really set in for me the fact that i could come out one day; my friends mom referred to me as seance (and like. obviously she respected my gender she has a trans kid) but it was just super jarring bc no adult had known yet abt my identity in any way and as a result i was rlly glad it was nighttime in that car bc i cried almost immediately; the first time i came out on my Own was to my cousin and he laughed in my face so that was pretty damn awful and its kinda funny cuz the bastard is bi so u would think hed have been accepting but n0pe!

If you’re out, how did your parents/guardians/friends react?-im out to my friends now ! and the reception was generally positive bc i think i do an ok job at picking ppl to be around in terms of morals so there was little bad reception

What is one question you hate people asking about your sexuality?-i hate when ppl ask if im gay as in for men or gay as in for women because im trans, i am a man so when i say im gay i feel like that should be easy enough to put 2 and 2 together but when they ask that i feel as if they still view me as a woman

Describe the style of clothing that you most often wear.-emo of the gods themselves it is absolute scene and emo vomit and i love it; its seriously hard for me to wear dresses and skirts without dysphoria and just general discomfort but i own a couple anyway bc theyre cute i just. never wear them

Who are your favourite lgbt+ ships?-my main thing at the moment is gerard/frank/grant morrison bc i love poly fics very dearly and gerard/bert because bert mccracken deserved better than gerawrds internalized homophobia lol

What does makeup mean to you? Do you wear any?-makeup to me is an androgynous thing so i wear eyeshadow a lot and lipstick sometimes, eyeshadow is easier on my eyes than eyeliner bc im allergic to a lot of makeup thats on the heavier side so if i put on eyeliner my eyes will water and burn throughout the day but with eyeshadow im mostly ok; other opinion is that makeup on Anyone can be sexy as hell if they do it for fun and wear literally what they truly want and not just what they think is accepted or what they Should wear

Do you experience dysphoria? If so, how does that affect you?-oh yeah my dysphoria is pretty debilitating if im gonna be honest; i used to have very little problems with it because my hold on reality was loose at best (before i was medicated to clarify) but now that i am almost completely Here my dysphoria is pretty bad and even just like. the knowledge that i have breasts is pretty awful; a few weeks ago i put on an outfit that i have to wear a victorias secret bra to fit properly in and just one look in the mirror had me sobbing and i had to change my clothes before i could leave the house and i havent worn a bra since because just the thought of showing off my chest makes this stark fuckin dread shoot through my veins but i also have dysphoria in regards to my voice that i discussed at my last trans therapy group meeting actually ; my voice has a tendency to bounce around my octave range so sometimes ill be like. excited then hear what i sound like. and ruin it for myself immediately u kno? im not even gonna talk about my dicksphoria bc thats just. awful. 

What is the stupidest thing you’ve heard said about the lgbt+ community?-ohhhhhhhh my god u know what? ive heard..so much .. that im gonna instead take this opportunity to mention my mother genuinely thinks dnd is satanic

What’s your favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?-the fact that were so strong. we are so fucking strong we deal with violence and opposition constantly and at staggering rates yet we stay strong and we continue loving through all of it, whether its in dark corners in secret or loudly in the streets we continue loving and do so with all of our beings because we know its our own truth and well gladly go to hell if it means we got to love on earth (not that everyone believes in hell or the idea that us gays go to hell but my point stands)

What’s your least favourite thing about the lgbt+ community?-we have this audacity to create divide (to the fault of mostly cis white gay men thank u very much) when what we need to do is love each other because we are different but at the end of the day we all need to remain in tandem and as a family or we will never get to where we need to in terms of acceptance and that means being uplifting and protecting our trans sisters of color, our disabled lgbt members, our autistic lgbt members, our anything past cis white gay man because we all need recognition, we all need love, and to exclude any letters of lgbt is to tear ourselves down and set ourselves on fire

Have you ever been to your cities pride event? Why or why not?-no :((( no one would drive me in the past and i dont think ill have a way to get there this year either

Who is your favourite lgbt+ Icon/Advocate/Celebrity?-brian molko! my bisexual, androgynistically-inclined father who birthed me at the tender age of 16 when i found placebo

Have you been in a relationship and how did you meet?-ya theres been a few and i dont rlly like to talk abt my relationships with anyone unless theyre online relationships so im just gonna leave it at that

What is your favourite lgbt+ book?-pantomime by laura lam! its one of if not my favorite book to this day

Have you ever faced discrimination? What happened?-y a every damn day bitch ! example is when i was deadnamed by my psychiatrist while she knows full well what my name is the other day; another is the countless times i get called a lesbian ???? and when strict lesbians ask me out i get a very bad taste in my mouth (i understand full well that sexuality is fluid, these are lesbians that spit the ‘penis is gross blegh’ rhetoric)

Your Favorite lgbt+ movie or show?-uh im just gonna say preacher bc its my favorite show altogether n cass is bi/pan/something similar

Who are some of your favourite lgbt+ bloggers?-@ble3dmagic is my boyfriend in crime (not rlly thats a joke) and @musicalsense​ is my sunburnt Brother

Which lgbt+ slur do you want to reclaim?-queer! i also use f*ggot a lot when talking about myself and my friends that are ok with it

Have you ever gone to a gay bar, or a drag show, how was it?-i went to a drag show and it was so amazing and one of the first times i felt accepted in my own community that i cried

How do you self-identify your gender, and what does that mean to you?-well i identify as a man with no leaning towards womanhood or nonbinaryhood in any way, its just . man . but in terms of Expression i am quite androgynous bc i can rlly appreciate femininity (NOT the same as womanhood) and being a man to me means just that ive always wanted to grow up with that “gender role” like i always wish i was raised as a stereotypical parent would raise a son and ive always been more interested in stereotypically masculine things and people since i can even remember and i feel like puberty was just this unpreventable spiral into something i didnt want. i didnt want it at all . this is tmi but when i got my first period i cried my eyes out bc the idea of being called a Woman repulsed me so much and since i didnt even know that being trans was a concept i was just this scared puppy full of confusion and fear aimed at myself because all the stuff i heard i was supposed to be proud of the change but i wasnt i was so ashamed of it and the idea of being called a woman made me sick to my stomach and i just wish i could go back in time and hold myself and tell me itll be alright 

Are you interested in having children? Why or why not?-absoLutely not i hate kids (and by that i mean i hate being around them and the culture that surrounds having children; i do not treat kids like shit and i do not act like hating children is a personality trait; i get migraines and usually the second a child starts screaming or crying i am on the floor of my brain writhing in dire pain and i have absolutely no desire to support another human life when frankly i cant even support myself; its also just not a lifestyle i want to live)

What identity advice would you give your younger self?-god so fucking much. so fucking much. so many things i wish i could say to myself

What do you think of gender roles in relationships?-i think if someone wants to adhere to them then hell yea go ahead just dont expect others to do it or try to tell other people its a Norm or something; theyre for the most part christian in nature so i dont have any desire to follow them myself, i want a relationship (if any) thats more of a coexistence if that makes sense, like. roommates plus dick

Anything else you want to share about your experience with gender?-i always used to anxiously chew on the idea that my chest dysphoria is just me holding disdain for the shape and size of my breasts but let me tell you. the second i put on my binder for the first time i immediately started crying because i was so overwhelmed by the fact that i was looking at something one step closer to myself and i know full well i am never going to have that doubt again. this week has been exponentially cathartic and therapeutic for me

What is something you wish people know about being lgbt+?-i want the cisheteros to know that nothing they learn about us is new. everything about us has been around for so so long but has been silenced and erased to the point where a lot of us dont even know many things about our rich and beautiful history

Why are proud to be lgbt+?-honestly? its hard for me to not just straight up say im not proud of my identity. its taken me years to stamp down the plain grieving toward my identity and wishing i could have the easier path but frankly? the fact that i am choosing this path of hardship and hell on earth just to be who i truly am i think speaks volumes of my pride in my identity at this point; further back in my archive by a few years my posts are littered with sentiments of bitterness wherein i stated that i hate being trans and not just cis but i like to think ive finished hating myself for my identity. i like to think im proud now. to ask me why is to ask too much of me, all i know now is that i am proud and thats enough for me right now.

[httpsaw]

— 85 questions 💌

rules: answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag more people

i was tagged by @1esbiana thank u for tagging me angel!!

- LAST

1. drink - Raspberry & Blackberry water

2. phone call - My friend Emily

3. text message - my other friend Courtney

4. song you listened to - See you again by Tyler the creator

5. time you cried - Monday

- EVER

6. dated someone twice? - No

7. kissed someone and regretted it - the only 2 ppl ive kissed were guys so yes

8. been cheated on - No

9. lost someone special - Yeah

10. been depressed - Yes dsdfsjksdf still am b!

11. gotten drunk and thrown up - i havent thrown up i know my limits

- FAVE COLORS

12. Red

13. White

14. Green

- IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU…

15. made new friends - yeah and lost them but it be like that

16. fallen out of love - yes :(

17. laughed until you cried - yes omg i rlly be thinking i peed bc how hard i laughed

18. found out someone was talking about you - uhh yeah:/

19. met someone who changed you - no tbh its just me changing 

20. found out who your friends are - yeah:/

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list - no

- GENERAL

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl - all except 1

23. do you have any pets - a cat who i love legit i could go on for hours

24. do you want to change your name - i kinda wanna legally change my name to Rosa but thats tew much work

25. what did you do for your last birthday - no omg my birthdays r so depressing lets not talk abt this

26. what time did you wake up today - midday bc its not hot so i can rest

27. what were you doing at midnight last night - litchrally sleeping bc again its not hot so i dont have to suffer

28. what is something you can’t wait for - not being mentally ill & looking back at who i was in 10 years and how far i got or havent got

30. what are you listening to right now - Flower boy by Tyler the creator

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom - yeah in primary school but i never saw him after that and i dont even remember anything abt him except his name

32. something that gets on your nerves - people talkin over me it makes me so mad, ppl who dont listen/just ignore u like bitch okay then.

33. most visited website - uh tumblr or pinterest i love that bitch

34. hair color - dark brown i dont dye my hair bc im worried abt burning my head

35. long or short hair - its slowly making its way to shoulder length cant wait to cut it again i love cutting my own hair omg

36. do you have a crush on someone - no idk like this half year ive just been thinking abt myself and how i can better myself, plus everyone i know/met im not attracted to so

37. what do you like about yourself - uh my eyes, my ability to empathise, how i can stand up for myself sometimes, my creativeness

38. want any piercings? - no sometimes i want to get my ears pierced for hoop earings but i have hearing aids and ive been self consious of them since i was a kid i dont wear them when i should n i dont want to draw attention BUT im trying to accept it n be confident like im struggling w my voice but im kinda accepting it and liking it so i gotta accept my deafness bc i pierce my ears thats so dumb sjkdjkks

39. blood type - idk i feel like this is so ppl can steal my kidneys go away (or at least pay me)

40. nicknames - litchrally just Rosa or “that sad bitch”

41. relationship status - single also ive been thinking abt this like obv im 19 n v shy/isolated but im worried ill never fall in love w someone bc ive had ppl love me but like i just dont feel like i will ever truly love someone and not be over it in a week

42. zodiac - Leo sun/Sag Moon/Taurus Rising

43. pronouns - He/Him or They/Them i dont mind

44. fave tv shows - Breaking Bad, Pretty Little Liars, idk most of them suck n i get bored of them

45. tattoos - i have 2 n i want more but im poor :’(

46. right or left handed - right

47. ever had surgery - yeah ive had like 7 i was supposed to have had my 8th but uhhhhhhh yeah the phsycologist didnt think it was the right time

48. piercings - no go away

49. sport - do i look like i do sports??? (this was in the voice of that vine sjkdjkdsfjk)

50. vacation - im always on a vacation in my mind when i close my eyes

51. trainers - i wear one pair of shoes n theyre white nikes i love them i only like the white shoes bc i hate the black pair i have bc they look weird n i dont buy shoes often i may buy boots soon tho

- MORE GENERAL

52. eating - go away

53. drinking - i answered this before?

54. i’m about to watch - myself pin some stuff to my pinterest boards

55. waiting for - myself to finish this and then do my skincare routine

56. want - time to stand still so i cant breathe

57. get married - i said it before idk if ill ever love someone i probably will right like so many people do? but idk if i want to get married, i like the idea of a wedding n dressing up all nice but idk if its for me

58. career - uhhh writer fml or florist like idk if i need a degree for that but like lemme plant flowers ok damn

- THIS OR THAT

59. hugs or kisses - hugs

60. lips or eyes - eyes bc some ppl dont moisturize their damn lips

61. shorter or taller - taller bc im short but if my future gf was shorter then like ok? sflkkl like what am i supposed to do get her really high boots to wear?

62. older or younger - older i guess? i only have dated ppl my age but as long as its not a big age gap yk like i dont want to date a 30 year old rn sdfkksfdk

63. nice arms or stomach - arms bc i wanna be held

64. hookup or relationship - neither bc id have a panic attacksdjfsfjjkfsdjk too real

65. troublemaker or hesitant - uhh? idk ? what does this mean? im hesitant like i wanna make sure shit aint gonna ruin me or go awful and if it does i have a plan/vague idea on how to fix it

- HAVE YOU EVER

66. kissed a stranger - no id rather choke

67. drank hard liquor - yes but name a drink that doesnt taste like death

68. lost glasses - i dont have glasses but i probably would

69. turned someone down - yea haha i laugh bc im uncomfortable bc it ruined a rlly close friendship i had oh well!

70. sex on first date - no id rather DIE

71. broken someone’s heart - yes :(

72. had your heart broken - yes im a sensitive bich!

73. been arrested - no i know ppl that have been but thats as close as i ever wanna get

74. cried when someone died - i cried when allison argent & lexa died but noone irl

75. fallen for a friend - yeah but it was online n we dont talk anymore but i do miss her

- DO YOU BELIEVE IN

76. yourself - yes im a legend (im in a good mood so yes i do)

77. miracles - uhhh i dunno?

78. love at first sight - yes im not even gonna play

79. santa claus - no but if ppl do thats cute n who am i to tell them not to

80. kiss on a first date - id let u know if i ever go on one!

81. angels - dunno? i guess i believe in god but angels? not really? like i wouldnt say they definetly DONT exist but i also wouldnt put my faith in them

- OTHER

82. best friend’s name - uh thats my cat Zulu

83. eye color - brown

84. fave movie - 13 going on 30 i bought it on discount from morrisons thinking i wouldnt like it but itd be something to watch but biiiiiiiitch i feel in love w that movie!!!

85. fave actor - crystal reed but only bc she played allison argent n i still would die for her

-Tag others: @matd @01chuu @lunesgf @nbwlw n anyone else who wants to 

[goldenscript]

jack frost!minhyuk

lee minhyuk, a man of not only jovial fun but of snow and frost and all the glorious white mush that dusts lush green lawns and ices over ponds and nips at everyone’s noses

he’s the kind of spirit that accepted his fate and didn’t mind the tasks they thrusted at him bc what else could he do??? fight the greater deities for cursing him????

you could say he’s an optimist because there’s no other way to see life at this point

he’s always been that kind of half full guy and he’ll always make the most of any situation so knowing that he let his younger sister have a life is all that he can ever ask for - he just happened to be given a second chance

this time to bring joy and life to others like he had with his sister

it took him quite a while to get acclimated to being a holiday spirit, but having fun has always been his kind of thing

he often played games with his sister, ice skating, snowball fights, sledding,,, all that good stuff

so when he was given the ability to control the one thing he loved the most in the world (aside from his lil’ sis) he made sure to make the most of every winter season

at first, he was always shy to interact with younger kids because he was so sure that no one could see him - the first time someone walked right past him, he sulked for ages ok

but then he meets your great aunt who lives away from the city and on the outskirts - at the time she didn’t have a lot of friends so she just wished for one and somehow minhyuk and her crossed paths

not that it was an accident or anything, but he has fled from the city with a sad heart, wandering until he stumbled across a lake that resembled the one when he was alive and he saw your great aunt

when she saw him, she lit up despite being so shy but she just knew he was so okay so she greeted him and gosh did he warm up

she looked right at him and nodded when he pointed at himself like “me??” and she asked him if he wanted to play and that’s what began their time together

even well into her adult life as she married and had kids, she still believed in him because he became such a huge part of her childhood and she invited him to do the same with her children

they didn’t quite remember him as they grew older but it came as a relief to him that she did

when she was alone and withered by age, he still came to see her and eventually saw you

not many people liked to visit her because she was always talking about a “minhyuk” but neither you nor your parents cared (though your parents more or less pitied the older woman tbh) so they let you stay with her and you became his playmate

you knew him by minnie than minhyuk,,, always shrieking his name in laughter and elation because he was the best playmate you’d ever known

most importantly, because he could conjure up snow,,,, tho he was total cheat at snowball fights ngl & at the end, he would let you win and pelt him with snowballs then return to the cottage with you for your great aunt’s famous hot cocoa

and many years went on like this and the loneliness you felt sort of melted away because all you can remember is fondness in your childhood and of a boy named minnie

who still thinks abt you tbh,,, he stops by your aunt’s to ask abt you and help her and he just,,, hopes that you’d come back one day

tbh, you’re not sure when you stopped believing in minnie but you do know it came right as soon as your visits to your great aunt grew less and less

even when you did stop, you mostly cared for her and tried to help her esp during the summer when the weather was the hottest bc she insisted she was fine during winters

unlike her own kids, you helped her the most - your parents encouraged it though mostly for their own benefit to rake up than anything else

after college, with a job lined up and everything, you actually decide to move there instead of a place in the city like they wanted and they disliked how you decided not to sell the house when you were gifted the cottage in her will 

ofc now,,,, you’re scared

it’s the first time you’re truly living alone and caring for a small place all on your own but you’re also comforted by the nostalgia because the faint memories of your great aunt and your imaginary friend minnie - a point in time when life was easier than worrying about living and paying bills

one day when you’re on the ice abt to skate and you’re wobbling he actually appears and says “still not good on the ice huh?”

you’re surprised, rubbing your eyes in disbelief, “minnie??????????????”

he just smiles, “well it’s minhyuk but you can still call me minnie!!!”

you’re almost certain it’s a dream but you don’t care bc you want to enjoy this moment and not think abt bills and taxes and all that other crap that’s sure to take away the fun from life

so you just grin and say, “hi minhyuk, i’m y/n”

“i know!”

“you do??”

“i remember u,,,, i was hoping you’d come back actually”

you’re surprised but before you can scold your dream self for being so childish you realize you don’t really care

and !!! he admits he’s always had the most fun with you bc you were always telling him silly stories and making him laugh and it makes you so happy that you can’t stop yourself from doing it again

this time with robots and dinosaurs and the great world war of the past and present and other great stuff you hadn’t actually told anyone since they were all pretty unconventional stories

you go to bed that first night wishing you didn’t have to wake up because this was first time you actually felt free since you last moved there but even in your dreams he’s there and it makes you smile and sleep well

the next day,,, you wake up a little late but you’re quick to get ready to run errands and you’re still pretty dazed as you walk off the bus and toward your cottage until you see a pair of feet that could only belong to one person

you almost drop the hot cocoa ingredients and he’s immediately scooping the items into his arms and scolding you like “careful!!! sheesh”

you laugh a little nervously bc you swore you were dreaming the other day ago bc he can’t be really right??

but as you both round the corner of the pathway toward the front door, he just laughs and says, “srsly you aren’t I’m really here”

he even lets you poke his cheek and squeeze his arm just to make sure because you’re seriously trying to wrap your head around the fact that your imaginary friend from childhood may not have been imaginary after all,,, but you figure he isn’t some malevolent spirit trying to kill you,,, hopefully

so you’re like “well,,, would you like to come in for hot cocoa then?” and as he makes himself at home, enjoying the way you decorated and everything, you make your great aunt’s secret recipe which he loves too

and the moment realization strikes him, his features just like up and he’s like “!!!!!!!!!! you’re amazing”

you laugh and you thank him for always making your childhood really fun and for keeping you company

he’s just like “yeah ofc it’s what your great aunt wanted,,,,” 

and you smile a lil sad but he just puts his hand on top of yours to comfort you and it makes you smile,,, bc he’s still nice and kind as ever and that,,,, seriously warms your heart

it just becomes this routine to stay with minhyuk, do errands, and even once in a while go to your job with him present bc ur office is pretty secluded from everyone else’s

he makes u laugh and feel really happy like even more than reliving your childhood nostalgia and you’re certain that it might be more than a platonic thing but you don’t want to say anything

it isn’t until one day when jooheon, a guy from ur office, asks you out and minhyuk is actually frowning and pouting bc “??? are you really going out with this guy???? why not spend time with me??”

you actually have to excuse yourself to take minhyuk aside like “??? what’s ur deal”

but he just clamps up because how can he just say that without coming off as some child y’know??

so he’s just like “um,,,, i,,, i don’t know! what’s urs?”

of course, you’re confused but before you can say anything else he just disappears and says he’ll see you later

,,,but by “later” he actually means later bc he doesn’t appear for a few days especially since ur lil’ hangout with jooheon

it wasn’t even anything special either since all you could think about was minhyuk and if he was ok because he seemed really upset and the thought of him upset actually,,, hurt you,,, A Lot

so anyway, you’re out in your backyard drinking hot cocoa with a plate of cookies and there’s another mug for him

you’re just sitting there like “where r u dummy?” but he doesn’t show up and it’s starting to get really cold so you leave it out and the next morning you find the plate and mug washed in your dish rack

and the rest of the day kind of drone on without minhyuk’s company and it makes you even more sad bc you miss him terribly

turns out he misses you too !!

well, duh

in all that time you two spent together, he’s grown attached to you and a part of him has been at war with himself since then because is that even ok ??

he’s known you since childhood and you’ve seen him as a figment of your imagination ,,, having feelings for you now seems so out of the question but then he thinks back to the way you look with snow caught in ur hair,,, the way you’ll hold his hand real tight even when you’re both inside,,, the fact that you can make ur great aunt’s hot cocoa and cookies so effortlessly ???

but ok rlly,, you’ve become such a kind and caring soul with such a selfless way of thinking and it makes him feel so happy to see that y’know??

it also makes him sad tho bc you told him abt how you were pretty much alone since your parents didn’t like your decisions to keep your great aunt’s place and how you didn’t have a lot of friends just bc of your parents and honestly he was your sole friend

like that? that breaks his heart and it makes him so freaking torn because he doesn’t want to hurt you like that yknow?

he doesn’t want to abandon you but he also doesn’t want to have these feelings for you but he just,,, he can’t help himself

even when his friends keep telling him to leave well enough alone, he looks to the man on the moon and he just,,, knows that this is where he should be

(ofc after all his tasks are done and all,,, which doesn’t take long but he sees that one of the weather spirits are being particularly mean and aiming a storm in your area and it has him racing there)

one night there’s a particularly horrid snow storm with lightning and thunder and you’re kinda terrified bc you’ve never been that keen on thunderstorms

and to be frank, it’s the first time you’ve ever suffered through a storm in the cottage without your great-aunt too,,,,

but minhyuk shows up bc he can’t stand seeing you so freaked out and he eases up on the snow even tho some of it isn’t his doing

(though he’s sure to deal with that later)

he asks if you’re ok and u get only a lil snippy bc “where have you been, you chicken head????? how could u just leave me and take my hot cocoa???”

he apologizes and admits he’s jealous bc jooheon can be seen out with u and u won’t look crazy and he just,,,, really likes u.

in all that time you two spent together, even in that time apart - it dawns on you why it upset you so much that he left and it isn’t just cuz he’s one of your only friends

so you say, “god you’re a dummy” and before he complain, you admit, “i like you too so don’t leave me ok it makes me sad”

he just lights up and a lot of the angry snow sort of dissipates as he draws you into his arms and feels you tighten ur hold on him

and because of this, it makes u both closer than ever

like christmas is even better than ever bc even tho your parents weren’t keen on that stuff, he helps u decorate and make cookies for santa (tho he eats them because he refuses to share those godsent cookies)

you both exchange gifts and he adores the mittens you made him with the lopsided thumbs and you love the snowflake necklace he had made and purchased (it took lots of begging from the man on the moon just to have a physical form that day even for like ,,,, 2 hours,,,, yes shopping really took that long for him,,,, rip)

and as you both get up from your spots on the rug by the fire place to put the dishes away by the doorway, he can’t help but point up when you’re down with the dishes with this cute, mischievous smile

you look up, brow raised and cheeks flushed but you pull him downward by the collar of his sweater and y’all kiss under the mistletoe

of course, it makes you sad when spring rolls in but he promises to pop in even if it is unconventional and he gets in trouble

and boy does the man on the moon do a good scolding every now and then, just for him

but even the spirits love the two of you together and they’ll send you nice gifts because it makes them happy to see minhyuk happy after this long

regardless of everything, even with the grand design telling you both that this won’t work out, you’re content bc he’s in your heart and you’re in his

[sin-scythes-and-assaults]

Family Sucks: The Rant (tm)

When I see posts and videos that are like ‘aw my mum/dad/carer are so cool I relate to them so much we’re best friends!!! !! !! ! ! !! !! !!!!’ I wanna just cry tbh because I know that I will never have anything like that??? I feel like I need to get the whole story out for whoever is reading this to understand so I guess ill start with my dad. My dad, for lack of a better term, is an arsehole. For all his claims that ‘you’re my child of course I love you!’, he really had a problem showing that. When I think of him, I don't think about the now-obvious attempts to win us over in some silent war between my mum and him - I think of how he’d ask me what I did at school (aged 6), and then completely ignore what I said, saying a quiet ‘uh huh, yeah, sounds great!’ as he sat on his phone in the car waiting for my older sister. I’d remember the disinterest he had towards us in terms of our hobbies and interests, and even discouraged me at times because the things I wanted to do ‘weren’t suitable for a girl’ (it was fishing. I wanted to learn how to fucking fish like both of my brothers, and he said no because I was a girl. I had to teach myself and save up for months to buy my own rod, bearing in mind I was about 8-10yo at the time). I’d remember the screaming matches at 3 in the morning with my mother, who I didn't realise was actually standing up for herself for once. My mum, when I was younger, wasn't much different. However, she had a reason, and I excuse her for it. She used to work full time as a nurse, with very limited pay, and had to look after my three siblings and I, not to mention provide for a father who did next to nothing about the house, but contributed greatly to the bills. She was tired - and I don't mean ‘yawn ooh I'm a little bit sleepy’. I mean. Tired. She tried not to fall asleep during mealtimes, knowing that in a few hours she’d have to go on another 11 hour shift. She’d take sleep where she could, but it wasn't enough because she had to look after four of us and a father who was barely there. We were a poor family, mainly because my dad refused to help with anything other than the mortgage and the electricity and gas bills. He didn't pay for food for a family of 6 every week, my mum did, and she barely made enough money as it was. Also, I don't know why, but I have always thought that, to some extent, these severe money problems were my fault. Don't ask why, I just thought they were. She tried to connect with all of us while she could, but I think that because I was the youngest, I was the last priority. I felt excluded from the whole family, being constantly picked on by my older brothers and my sister, too. My self worth also went down when I made friends with a certain girl in my year at school. She abused me. She hit me, slapped me across the face, bit me and dug her nails into my skin until I bled. This happened regularly. I still have a scar on my hand when she decided to make me play a ‘cute game’ where one person was basically to hurt themselves until the other person completed a task. (I wont go into details about this game bc its fucking horrible) She didn't even properly tell me what was happening, only to ‘trust her’, and I ended up getting hurt for it. She humiliated me in front of someone I had a crush on for almost a year multiple times, called me fat (which prompted me to have a very bad diet consisting of only one small meal a day and nothing else, thinking it would make me attractive), worthless, and blackmailed me into staying in contact with her, even until about 4 or 5am most nights. This took a toll on my mental health, and I started to self harm. Life sucked, I finally confronted her about it with my best friend, and she fucked off, claiming she was the victim. I managed to stop self harming. Things got better. But!!  !!! !!!! ! A few years later I fell out with my Best friend over something (I cant even remember what??? I'm p sure it was my fault though and I still feel fucking terrible) and we didn't talk to each other again (I recently got in contact with her though and she’s still as amazing as ever. I missed her so much) Fast forward to the second half of 2014, where my parents arguing had come to a head (bearing in mind, the reason for said fighting was kept from me until only a few months ago) and my dad had permanently moved out. They got a divorce and now live miles away from each other. My dad, being the glorious fuckwit he is, decided to give us a total of 3 months to sell our house, find a new one to buy that was more affordable and could house 5 people (which was simply impossible) and move in. This is because he decided to stop paying the mortgage , and we had three ‘paid’ months left until it essentially got repo’d, unless we find this magical fantasy house he left us to find. As you can imagine, it didn't go well. We did manage to sell our house, but we had to lower the price drastically so the snotty family that bought it would actually consider it (they were arseholes too). So we had limited money from the sale of our house to buy the one we had picked out, which was now too expensive for us. We didn't get the rest of the money in time. We ended up homeless for a year, but fortunately, my gran had a big house. Unfortunately, there wasn't enough room for us all, even if we shared. My eldest brother, Dominic, was essentially ‘booted out’ to go live with his girlfriend and her family because he was ‘expected to’. We hardly see him now. (I miss him) I had to share a room with multiple family members, so I had no privacy at all. The only time I was alone was when I was in the shower. Meanwhile, my gran was picking apart my school life, my hobbies and my interests, saying that what I wanted out of my future wasn't worthwhile. I had to deal with this for a year. A year. I relapsed into self harm, almost went through with killing myself on multiple occasions, and thought about genuinely just up and running just so I could leave all the shit behind. We found a house. It was a shithole and the seller was wanting way more than it was worth -It was all we could afford. We bought it. We had to spend thousands damp proofing the whole house because the guy lied and said he had done it. We had to spend thousands on new windows because they had severe problems and were letting in currents of water when it rained. There was rot beneath the floor and in the attic so we had to spend hundreds to get it redone. We became very very poor again. I could hear my mum crying herself to sleep at night again. If we had been any more in debt we would have had to sell this house just months after getting it. My room is so small I cant lie out on my floor without my feet hitting a wall, the walls are so thin that I can hear my sister breathing as she sleeps in the room across the hall. I began to collect plants. They depended on me, they needed me, and that's the kind of responsibility that I needed - something wanted me. I had something to look forward to at the end of the day. I had mini hydrangeas, a trellis with honeysuckle and jasmine by my window, lavender, lemonbalm, everything. I knew what their individual needs and wants were and in turn they helped me sleep at night. They started to die. My mum had decided to spray them with a pesticide that was too ‘strong’ for them, and in the wrong places. Their leaves started to rot and they all. Died. I still act to this day that it wasn't a big deal, that it was just a silly mistake, but I know that I wont ever find that same happiness again????? I think about those plants sometimes and somehow I always bring the blame around to me and I don't understand why I do that with everything?? Regardless, I was fucking sad and my mum started to bitch about it. Then, I find out a few months ago that the reason that my mum and dad got a divorce was because my dad had been cheating since at least the mid 90′s. since a few years before I was born. For 18 fucking years he had been cheating, all with different women apparently, and I had been fucking clueless. Again, because I'm a self-depreciating piece of shit, I brought the blame back to me and tell myself ‘if you noticed sooner you could've said to ma and she wouldn't have had to go through that shit’ but the thing is, I know I wouldn't have realised because I didn't know any different??? And when I tried to talk to my ma about it one thing she said was that ‘there were faults on both sides’ and now that's got me thinking ‘what if she cheated too?’ If it turns out she has, I seriously don't know what I'm going to do??? because shes made it out all these years that they've been divorced that my dad is the ‘bad guy’ and I don't know what I'm going to do if I find out the woman I've been heralding as ‘strong and brave’ for standing up to that kind of behaviour from my dad did the same thing And it scares me so much Who knows I might add to this later through an edit but now im in a rlly sad place n I wanna stop

[qamrine]

big q&a!

I was tagged by @justafangirlwithideas (thanks btw I loveee these)

this took so long lol

THE LAST:
 1. Drink: chocolate almond milk 2. Phone call: idk I don’t call anyone lol probably my mom 3. Text message: My friend Clare who doesn’t know what tumblr is 4. Song you listened to: radioactive- Imagine dragons 5. Time you cried: After finishing the Song of Achilles HAVE YOU:
 6. Dated someone twice: No 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: No 8. Been cheated on: No 9. Lost someone special: family members who’ve passed away and friendship breakups 10. Been depressed: ehh depressed is a strong word… I don’t think so 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: nope and I do not plan on it LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLORS:
 12. Indigo 13. Silver 14. Orangey yellow IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:
 15. Made new friends: Yes! 16. Fallen out of love: no… but I’ve gotten over a few crushes? 17. Laughed until you cried: definitely. 18. Found out someone was talking about you: yeah it sucks 19. Met someone who changed you: ofc 20. Found out who your friends are: if that means realizing someone’s a bitch and cutting them out my life that yeah lmao 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: pf who has Facebook anymore GENERAL:
 22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: no Facebook for me 23. Do you have any pets: yes my dog he’s the bomb 24. Do you want to change your name: last name, I like my first name 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: I got a nosebleed and took 5 tests :/
26. What time did you wake up: 9ish 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: on tumblr ofc 28. Name something you can’t wait for: frikin QoAaD obviously 29. When was the last time you saw your mom: half hour ago 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: I wish I was a better conversationalist 31. What are you listening right now: my dad’s show from downstairs. It’s rlly loud…
32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: yes. I have an uncle and used to know this other boy 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: myself and my inability to get things done 34. Most visited Website: AO3 LOST QUESTIONS. I JUST PUT IN RANDOM INFO ABOUT ME
35. Mole/s: none 36. Mark/s: various scars 37. Childhood dream: to be happy 38. Haircolour: brownish blond 39. Long or short hair: in the middle 40. Do you have a crush on someone: Not really no 41. What do you like about yourself: literally nothing I’m not even saying that in an attempt to be edgy and relatable 42. Piercings: ears but they closed up 43. Bloodtype: I dunno 44. Nickname: bridge, beeg, bb 45. Relationship status: single 46. Zodiac: PICSES! 47. Pronouns: she/her 48. Favourite TV Show: sherlock! 50. Right or left hand: left 51. Surgery: No 52. Hair dyed in different color: no 53. Sport: I hate sports no 55. Vacation: I going on vacation in like a week to MA 56. Pair of trainers: I have these gray sneakers which are cool MORE GENERAL:
57. Eating: I just had some mac n cheese 58. Drinking: nothing 59. I’m about to: tell my self to stop doing these questionnaires and do my summer reading jk read fanfic 61. Waiting for: comfort 62. Want: to know what to do with my career 63. Get married: I hope so 64. Career: something important 65. Hugs or kisses: hugshugshugs 66. Lips or eyes: eyes 67. Shorter or taller: taller 68. Older or younger: younger but not like a kid they’re annoying 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: tummy 71. Sensitive or loud: sensitiveee 72. Hook up or relationship: Relationship ofc 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant but not like in an annoying way like me 74. Kissed a stranger: helll no 75. Drank hard liquor: wine? I don’t think that counts lol 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: if I had them I would lose them 77. Turned someone down: Yeah 78. Sex in the first date: not for me but do what u want 79. Broken someone’s heart: no I’m not that exciting 80. Had your heart broken: no 81. Been arrested: no 82. Cried when someone died: Yes 83. Fallen for a friend: I had a crush on a friend and regret it sooo much now DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
84. Yourself: helll no 85. Miracles: Sure 86. Love at first sight: lmao no 87. Santa Claus: no 88. Kiss on the first date: do what u want 89. Angels: nope I just like reading about them in fiction books OTHER:
 90. Current best friends name: idk I want a bff though 91. Eyecolour: blue 92.Favourite movie: The Emoji Movie

[golddustdude]

1-30 lmfao

of course you'd do this lmao love you tho 1. describe your idea of a perfect date: breakfast at a local diner. watch buffy the vampire slayer w/ me.! thrift shopping. maybe get coffee or ice cream later2. whats your “type”: hot emo babes 3. do you want kids?: sometimes i do, i'm not really sure.4. if you do, will you adopt or use some other form of child birth?: whatever my partner n i decide5. describe the cutest date you’ve ever been on: well even though my ex and i had a very bad end to our relationship, the beginning was cute. when we first met on tumblr she messages me sayin i was cute and wanted to take me on an aquarium date. fast forward a some months, we finally me irl (i flew to georgia to see her!) and we got to go on an aquarium date. was real cute. 6. describe your experience having sex for the first time (were you nervous? or was it easy peasy?): i am a virgin so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 7. are you a morning time gay or night time gay?: im both tbh. must be bc i'm bi8. opinion on nap dates?: it's a yes from me9. opinion on brown eyes?: on myself, eh. on anyone else,,, i lov!!!10. dog gay or cat gay?: dog 100%11. would you ever date someone who owned rodents or reptiles?: yes of course!! 12. whats a turn off you look for before you start officially dating someone: basically just look for any toxic or manipulative traits. their opinions on things like blm, capitalism, fascism, who they voted for, intersectional feminism, etc. 13. what is a misconception you had about lgb people before you realized you were one?: nothing really. i wasn't ever aware of the gays™ being a bad thing until i was older 14. what is a piece of advice you would give to your younger self: stop caring what people think. stop trying to force yourself to be somebody you're not. do things for yourself and your happiness and not for anyone else.15. (if attracted to more than one gender) do you have different “types” for different genders?: nah i like anyone and everyone lmao. 16. who is an ex you regret?: the last person i was in a relationship with tbh. 17. night club gay or cafe gay?: cafe. clubs are def not my ideal hangout place 18. who is one person you would “go straight” for: that's not a thing, bye19. video game gay, book gay, or movie gay?: book gay!!20. favourite gay ship (canon or not): wayhaught. clexa. supercorp. brittana. holstein. bechloe. etc.21. favourite gay youtuber: i don't rlly watch youtube but kaitlyn alexander is cool 22. have you ever unknowingly asked out a straight person?: no23. have you ever been in love?: yes 24. have you ever been heartbroken?: yes yes yes 25. how do you determine if you want to be them or be with someone: heck if i know. i hardly can tell the difference between a crush and like a "i want to be your friend / i want to be you so bad" type admiration26. favourite lgb musician/band: against me!, GLOSS, soft cell, Mary Lambert, ptx/superfruit, etc27. what is a piece of advice you have for young / baby gays: p much the same advice i gave my younger self. dont do things for anyone else. don't be scared to be you, but don't do anything you're not ready for. if you don't want to/can't come out, don't. you're still valid!!! 28. are you out? if so how did you come out: ya. i came out in 8th to my friends over texts and to my mom and dad through letters 29. what is the most uncomfortable / strange coming out experience you have: i guess just that it's still constant? and when people find out i'm trans they get weird™ 30. what is a piece of advice for people who may not be in a safe place to express their sexuality: like i said before, you're not any less valid!!! you're still amazing and loved!!!!