#never lasted very long bc i dont find catharsis in it. like i can make myself bleed digging my nails into my skin when i need to stay calm

[jvzebel-x]

🦋

[midoriyasbones]

vent don't like don't read

blacklist #jules vents if you dont want to see my vents which is... completely fair, ngl.

i just feel fucking sad.

i know it's normal to miss a relationship for a long time. i don't think you can ever fully just 'get over it' when you have a deep, personal connection. everyone's different, but when you're with someone for over a year, exchanging trust and love, it's normal to miss them months or even years later.

i don't think about them on a daily basis, though the past week they've been on my mind a lot. there are just moments when it hits me. sometimes they're days or even weeks apart, and i don't think the experience is mutual. that's probably what hurts the most, because i don't think what we had was ever mutual.

it makes me angry. partially because i don't think he ever truly acknowledged the way he hurt me. not just talking behind my back, but encouraging others to join in, refusing to tell me the truth, not even giving me the chance to change. it wasn't just one thing he did. he cultivated malice. and i KNOW i'm not innocent, but i truly don't think i 'deserved' what i got. if i had been told what was up, not even by him, but by anyone, i would've done what i could to make things right. i'm certainly not innocent, and i don't put the blame on him. it's a decent 50/50. but you can't fix a problem you don't know about, which makes me think he didn't want to fix it anyways. he just wanted to move on to something better.

as much as i don't like his new partner, i genuinely hope they are happy together, and i hope they're able to forge a healthier relationship than ours was. as angry as i am, and i am so angry. i want to burn something, but i don't want them to burn. i think i need catharsis in that aspect. maybe i should find a rural cornfield and just scream or something. that is a thing i could do, and probably should do. it might help somewhat.

but god, i hope their new partner never struggles with anything, because they don't deserve to be treated the way i was.

what happened was cruel. everybody i've talked to about this agrees. the psych ward patients, er docs, therapist, the fucking psychologist who did my evaluation last month. i enter a relationship with one personality disorder and exit with three. HOW DOES THAT EVEN HAPPEN??? well, i know how. the psych said i already had the inclination from childhood trauma, but this relationship (more the final days of it and the aftermath) was so traumatic put me into a full blown presentation.

'if i had gone through what you have in the past five years, i wouldn't be capable of trusting someone either'

i feel broken by them. all of them. i feel unworthy of love or compassion or forgiveness or anything. i don't feel human. the very least i can do is just... speak. giving words to what i feel, in a space that someone might read it (not the people related to the event, get off my blog, why are you here, you're purposefully causing pain to the person you're 'protecting' from me, jesus christ) and then it just feels validated. it feels more real than a diary or just not talking about it. why are you allowed to talk about it but i can't? what makes my emotional expression different from yours? is it that it's entertaining to you? well, i know it is to one of you bc i see you in my stats counter constantly. god you're pathetic.

at the same time, i'm doubting that and it's so fucking stupid. when you said "it's obsessive", and implied normal people would be over it... that's not trying to reason with me, it's gaslighting. it says 'reality (the way i should be feeling; which is that i should be over it) is incongruent with your experience (which are the actual emotions i am feeling). i've been gaslit so much into believing that problems are monstrous, that i'm not human, that i am bottom of the barrel worthless piece of trash, that i actually wondered if it is true. it's not i know it's not. i wouldn't dare tell you that how quickly you moved on is abnormal. it's painful to me, sure, but that's a personal experience, not a universal one. so why is how i feel so unbelievable?

i'm being gaslit, just like when i was in that relationship (albeit, i'm 100% certain that the gaslighting was unintentional and inadvertent, the lying was not, and yes you did lie to me when i asked 'hey, is everyone mad at me? how can i fix this?' and you said they weren't. so you did lie to me, and i'm gonna stop myself before i ramble anymore than i already have). it feels like my emotions are trying to be pushed to the side because it's inconvenient for someone to know how much pain they caused. they don't want to accept that maybe, just maybe, what they did was an awful thing. not just a mistake, but something truly horrendous. i don't think you even felt guilt, i don't think any of you did.

i genuinely think if i got an apology. a real, true apology, from all of them, i could start that process. not just an 'im sorry if what i did hurt you', that's bullshit. is there any remorse? any regret? i don't want it if you don't care.

[goldrushzukka]

1, 2, 7, 8, 9. (Sorry, i know that's like...all of them)

1. what themes would you like to write about that you feel don’t get explored very often?

i love writing coming out storylines. it’s not really that they’re uncommon, i just find a lot of catharsis in them. 

2. what are some common elements of stories you are tired of seeing? what would you avoid writing about?

i tend to avoid writing sibling dynamics bc i’m an only child and therefore not really. qualified. i love reading it though!! 

7. favourite description in your WIP?

it was really hard to pick one so i have a few answers for this bc i love to talk about myself so. (under the cut bc JESUS this got long but spoilers for and i’ll do anything you say (read it here!) ahead!!!)

- from chapter 2:

Sokka looks at him, a fantasy come to life, and takes off his stupid sweatpants.

He throws them at Zuko’s head, and earns himself a short burst of that real laugh, shocked and unguarded.

“You asshole,” Zuko says. He sits up and grabs Sokka’s hand, pulling him down on top of him. Something comes alive under Sokka’s skin where Zuko’s fingers graze his wrist. He calls it lust and ignores the fact that it feels nothing like it.

Zuko kisses him, his mouth still in the shape of laughter, and the alive thing screams for his attention. Sokka buries it and hopes it won’t deafen him before they’re done.

im very fond of this whole chapter (i think it’s probably my favourite? it was definitely the easiest to write) but i really love looking back on this part particularly now that we’re in the angsty part of the story bc this is where it all started. yes technically it started in chapter 1 but this is when sokka starts to fall for zuko. this is the beginning of all those pesky non-casual feelings that he’s going to pretend don’t exist until someone else calls him out on them.

- also from chapter 2:

He’s forty-five minutes late already, and when he knocks, a woman made of pursed lips and sharp angles answers the door. She looks elegant and expensive the same way a skyscraper does. Or a cache of medieval weaponry.

“Oh,” Sokka says, digging into his pocket to find the map on his phone. “I must have the wrong place, sorry -”

She looks him up and down, her eyes narrowed in a way that feels violent and practiced, and her smirk turns distasteful. Sokka risks a glance down at himself, at his torn up jeans - not distressed, just torn - and the Madonna t-shirt he’s pretty sure actually belongs to Katara, and thinks she might have a point. The bag in his hand feels heavier when her eyes land on it.

“Zuzu,” the woman calls into the apartment, “your dinner’s here.”

“I didn’t order -” Zuko appears in the doorway, bitter frustration in his expression as he looks at the woman.

His eyes fall on Sokka, though, and his face clears into a light-pollution smile.

this is technically two so i will start with: i love azula. i haven’t found any room to bring her back yet but believe me i am LOOKING. she’s hot and mean and gay and i LOVE HER. oh also insider scoop but suki’s date from earlier in this chapter.......WAS azula. they probably won’t see each other again because once azula met sokka and connected his face to the Best Friends Forever picture frame on suki’s desk she stopped answering the phone.

pt 2: i’ve had a couple of comments mention the “light-pollution smile” line specifically and i am always so happy to read them bc yeah. YEAH. i’ll admit it. that line HITS. 

- from chapter 4:

He sets his phone down - only, he doesn’t. He misses the table by a mile, and in his scramble to catch his phone before it breaks on the hardwood floor and wakes Momo on the cushion beside him, his hand finds the lip of his cereal bowl, and then that’s falling, too. He manages to catch the phone, but something in his head gets lost in translation on its way down his arms, and he ends up with a boxers-only lap full of soggy Cheerios.

Momo gets a splash of milk on his back and hisses at Zuko for his crimes, and somehow that’s the worst part of it.

haley @fruitysokka said that this passage reads like an action movie and i think about it all the time. (thank u haley i love u)

- lastly this extended metaphor from chapter 6:

The soup is good, once the heat of it clears him up enough to taste it. It’s thick and warm and there’s enough pepper that Sokka gets a kick from it even in his condition. He feels it all the way down his throat and into his stomach, where it mixes with the prickly nervousness he’s feeling from Zuko’s attention.

He sets the bowl down on the table and asks, eyes stuck on his hands in Momo’s fur where he’s climbed into his lap, “How was the date?”

“It was good, actually,” Zuko says. “Jet seems like a nice guy. He’s very - uh - passionate, I guess you could call it? He’s a climate and human rights activist.”

The spines of Sokka’s nervousness turn to daggers.

...

“I said yes. We’re getting lunch on Sunday.”

The daggers are swords now, and Sokka’s heart sinks down, down, down, right to the hilt.

...

“I’ll text you when I’m home,” Zuko promises, and Sokka’s heart skewers itself on a second sword.

Zuko’s smile when Sokka says, “Thank you for the soup,” is a third.

The door closing behind him is a fourth.

The silence as Sokka shuffles back to bed is every single one that remains.

something something canon swordsmen something pride comes before the fall something chivalry fell on his sword from eden by hozier. you guys get it i dont have to explain myself

8. favourite dialogue in your WIP?

ok so i cant share my actual favourite dialogue bc it's a spoiler for chapter 8 and i technically haven't written it yet (it's in my brain just.....plaguing me) but it's GOOD i SWEAR so. once again i have more than one answer bc actually? i love this fic and im proud of it. deal with it.

- from chapter 1:

“Hey, stranger,” Sokka says, still watching him in the mirror. The corner of Zuko’s mouth ticks up.

“You’re not following me, are you?” Zuko’s tone is seductive, endlessly so, and Sokka wonders while he dries his hands if he has to put it on or if he just sounds like that.

“You give a guy one compliment and he thinks you’re stalking him,” Sokka mutters, and Zuko laughs, low and enticing. Not the genuine, endearing laugh of this morning, but one with an agenda.

Well. Sokka always likes a plan.

“Are you following me? ” Sokka asks. He spies a miraculous dry patch on the sink bank and tries to be casual about the way he hops up to sit on it.

“I might be,” Zuko says, and at Sokka’s raised eyebrow, he continues, “I saw you at the bar and I wanted to talk to you. Sue me.”

“You wanted to talk.”

“Amongst other things.”

as a chronically awkward person i am INSANELY proud of the flirting in this fic. no idea if it would work in a real life situation. excited to never find out bc im not about to use lines from my fanfiction on real women. 

- from chapter 2

“You must be Suki,” Zuko says. He meets her gaze, and his fingers go still under Momo’s chin.

“And you’re Zuko,” Suki replies, her smile all different shades of intimidating. “I’d shake your hand, but I know where it’s just been.”

i wrote this entire scene just so i could have suki say this. im not even joking. suki is my favourite part of this entire fic and its not even ABOUT her.

- from chapter 3:

When Sokka crosses the room and slips under the covers beside him, Zuko says, “I can leave, if you want. I can go home.”

...

He asks, still barely hovering over Zuko, “What if I don’t want that?”

Zuko swallows. “I can stay.”

“So stay,” Sokka says, and lays his head down on Zuko’s chest.

i just think it’s sweet. i like it a lot. makes my heart hurt a little when i think about it. 

- from chapter 4:

[Suki // 15:13] there is a LOT of chmpagrjn

[Suki // 15:13] cahpmhagne

[Suki // 15:13] chsanpghn

[Suki // 15:14] alcohol :)

once again: suki is the best part of this whole fic. i love her so much. she is the reason the word bestie exists. im really proud of the texting in this fic bc it’s my first time actually including it in fic and it’s turned out really well!!

- ok last one bc i just realised this is turning into a novel. from chapter 4:

“How’s my baby?”

Zuko glances down at Momo, batting at the untied laces of his shoes with one determined paw. “He’s doing just fine.”

“And how’s Momo?”

“He’s - what?”

are there better written, more narratively important and emotive lines in this fic? yes. is this the best part of the entire thing? also yes. i invented the jin/yue wedding because i needed a reason for zuko to have a key in what became chapter 6, but sometimes i think the entire fic exists just for this exchange. best dialogue i have ever written.

9. what scene was the hardest for you to write and why?

the start of chapter 6 of aidays was difficult. i kept wanting to skip ahead to the meaty parts - i.e, zuko and his soup - but i didn’t want to do sokka a disservice like that. it was also really hard to maintain the balance of accurately describing the delirium of illness while still being coherent for the reader? so that took me a couple of days to get right.

[papistark]

Okay. I’ve allowed a night to let everything sink in. I’m ready to talk about Endgame now.

*cinemasins voice* spoilers!! (duh..)

so the wounds are still fresh. v v v v v v v v v fresh. but my thoughts during the entire movie were just OMG IM TRYING TO REMEMBER EVERY SINGLE THING THAT IS HAPPENING SO I CAN REMEMBER IT AS LONG AS POSSIBLE BEFORE i inevitably go see this movie again

This is what the movie reduce me to like 99% of the time btw

now, I’m gonna try and break this up to be as organized as possible into 4 main sections which will be general thoughts, the highs, the lows, and closing thoughts. that may sound organized but I promise it won’t be and as always I’ll have to use bullet holes to even stay relatively "organized"

I'm sure I'm leaving stuff out that I either loved or would wanna discuss but tbh the ENTIRE FILM i was just like GOD I WANNA REMEMBER THIS FOREVER!! Every scene that happened i was like god there's still 3 hours of stuff that's going to happen but I want to remember it all!!!

Overall

this movie was good. and i’m mad it was so good and i found it so enjoyable for how dirty they did me. The pacing was pretty well done for a first viewing, but I'm sure after a couple rewatches I'll get caught up on the occasional misstep in the pacing and general direction the story took, but I really liked it!!

I thought the Thor stuff was kinda distasteful and honestly a joke that ran too long. Like ha ha okay we get it but also? He went through so much fucking trauma can we just lay off him? Damn? I don't wanna linger too much on it bc honestly the more I think about it the more I get upset the russos did him dirty

all the callbacks??? made me so emotional????? eleven years and almost two dozen films guys holy fucking shit it felt like such a good homage to bring stuff back

Yo literally when they went up to busted ass thanos i leaned over to my bf and whispered "are they just gonna kill thanos in the first ten minutes is that allowed" and uh YEP! WOW

Also the opening scene being Clint's family getting dusted... gasps in my theater y'all they went in hard on us

TIME HEIST!!!!!! FUCK marvel knows how to take you on a fun journey!! The concept was so fun!!

I also appreciate them mixing up the plot a bunch to keep us guessing!! Like fuck, when Thanos was finding out through Nebula... future nebula talking to past gamora i was SO SOFT... sisters...

Hulk was... weird. It felt a weird kind of fanservicey for a little bit, and honestly a little out of place? But. Eh. Wasn't the worst part. Certain parts of it were fun! I think I got used to it haha

Everyone looked. So good. After the time jump. Damn. Thank you make up department for everyone's new looks. I live for silver fox tony always.

I loved seeing Loki again i know it was so little content BUT I DONT CARE I'LL ALWAYS LOVE MY FUCKING PRINCE

We didn't get as much Nebula and Tony content as I was hoping but god it was so cute and tender in the beginning. Imagine all that bonding. Nebula finding tony on the floor, knowing he's on the brink of death, and propping him up in the seat :'(((( tony helping fix nebula :(((( the father daughter relationship we deserved and didn't get to see come to fruition.

AMERICA'S ASS. THANK YOU SCOTT LANG.

All the New York flash back was so fucking fun. The elevator scene. Brilliant. I really thought they were gonna recreate but it was such a fun tease. Also cap making fun of his past self for saying "i could do this all day" I SCREAM why do the Russo's get steve so well

Carol taking a direct punch in the face from Thanos without even flinching? We stan a goddess

ALSO SHORT HAIRED CAROL YESSSS I LIVED!!!!! YES!!!! (But also that movie could've used like way more Carol thats just mY OPINION)

Also AGAIN, I DON'T CARE THAT IT WAS FAN SERVICE, STEVE WEILDING MJOLNIR WAS E V E R Y T H I N G. They have TEASED US since that one middle avengers movie we don't talk about that he was worthy and!!! Our!! Son!! Is!! Fucking!!! Worthy. And the scene of thor making him swap w/ him "you get the little one" i screamed bitch

also I was living for how much Steve swore in this film lol literally fuck joss Whedon's characterization we don't know her!

Valkyrie on a Pegasus thank you THANK YOU i was living

That entire final action scene..... holy fucking shit y'all. It was just crazy enough without being too crazy. I loved the callback to the original long continuous shot

THE HEAVENS OPENED UP AND SANG WITH THAT A-FORCE SCENE. YES. ALL THE MARVEL LADIES LINING UP. THEY ARE HERE AND THEY ARE THE STRONGEST OF US ALL. A-FORCE. FUCKING A-FORCE. Thank you Russo's for my LIFE

Carol's little "hi peter parker :)" god i love them. I love peter. My fucking spider son. I missed him so much. I missed Tom Holland's sweet peach little face AH I CRIED WHEN HE SHOWED BACK UP

Also last kind of ~general~ thought i know i don't get time travel at all and it is an instant way to confuse me in any franchise but wouldn't steve doing what he did fuck literally everything up idk we'll get to steve in a bit

Highs

morgan

H.

fucking

stark

I CAN’T BELIEVE I GOT FED WITH SUCH GOOD TONY CONTENT THIS FILM ONLY FOR THEM TO STOMP ON MY HEART LMAOOO

DAD TONY BEING AS LOVING AND DOTING AND SWEET AND TENDER W/ HIS DAUGHTER AS WE ALL HAVE HEADCANONED HIM TO BE FOR YEARS!!!

TONY GETTING HIS JUSTIFICATION IN BEING MAD not just mad but PISSED at Cap for how everything fell out. catharsis. felt good scoob.

speaking of good tony content of course i need to just take a moment to YELL ABOUT STONY thank you russos for the fan service thank you for having tony ogle and comment on steve rogers’ ass it almost makes up for all the pain and suffering

btw do y’all think the H. for Morgan’s middle name stands for Harley because I LIKE TO THINK SO

also am i lowkey annoyed that like half of viewers won’t recognize an adult ty simpkin at tony’s funeral at the end even tho i know i shouldn't be because ot everyone is a die hard BUT half the articles im looking up for reviews and shit of that scene literally all the results are “SO WHO IS THAT KID AT THE END OF ENDGAME” YOU FUCKING FOOLS IT’S TONY’S FIRST BORN SON HARLEY KEENER FROM IRON MAN 3. FUCKS. im getting off topic anyway i was just happy they brought him back because I am an iron man 3 enthusiast and his relationship with tony was SO important and this confirms that at the very least tony kept in contact with him over all these years!!! and he wasn’t just some insignificant blip

Not to be stony on main but steve being the first person to hold Tony again once he was back on earth :)))) wrow.

Also the first thing tony telling him being "I lost the kid" WOW BREAK MY HEART MORE HUH!! WHY NOT!!

The first thing Peter doing when he saw Tony again :'') just rambling about everything that happened and tony just so happy to see him alive and hugging him so tight I'M NOT FINE!! NOTHING WILL EVER BE FINE AGAIN!!!

I appreciated the closure with Howard like?? A lot?? I'm the last person to be a Howard stark apologist, but I think his character and his relationship w/ Tony and how Tony viewed him as a father and as a man was so well crafted throughout the series??? Idk I liked that scene it was good to my baby.

And now a pOSSIBLY CONTROVERSIAL~~ opinion but..... I loved Steve's ending. I really did. I thought he got a beautiful and fitting ending and I was so happy. It meant so much especially to hear his reasonging being that in a way, he did it for Tony. He was inspired by what Tony told him. He saw Tony get his happy ending and for so many films now Steve has been searching for that and he missed an entire life. Tony helped him realize that. It just made me!! So emo!! Like Bucky's face when he knew Steve wasn't gonna be coming back. Steve's last convo w/ Sam. It was just amazing. I can't believe I'm seeing hot takes from people calling Steve selfish or blaming the fact that the Russos have a boner for Steggy or whatever. Who cares!!! Steve got his happy ending and it was well deserved and a wonderful arc!! Lay off him bc you ship him w/ Bucky or tony more damn!!!! (Idk about the timeline y'all dont come for me i really have no idea i think the Russos just said fuck it for that one even when talking about not fucking up the timeline)

Lows

Natasha deserved better. She did. I understand why they took her character arc the way that they did, and honestly, this is the first time I've felt we've seen Natasha have even a modicum of actual character traits since like, Iron man 2 and Avengers 1. She found purpose in keeping the family together and trying to help the people left living, while never stopping or losing contact with anyone else in their endeavors to fix what Thanos broke. As tired as I am of seeing a female character die for ~man pain~ this felt like so much more than that. In the end Nat wanted to sacrifice herself for the greater good, and that's what she did. I'm still fucking upset though, even though they've butchered her character across almost all the films she's been in

Thor being turned into an entire fucking joke. That's it. I got nothin left for the writers at this point.

So..... let's talk about Tony's death, shall we

"You can rest now" broke me. It truly did. I've never loved any fictional character across any medium as much as I have loved Tony Stark. But Pepper's line at the beginning "you'll sleep, but will you rest?" Is so fucking telling. I think I immediately knew for sure in that moment. Because she's right. And that's the worst part.

Peter :)))) finally :)))) calling :))))) tony :)))) by :)) his :)))) first :)) name :))) as he was dying :)))) asking him not to go the same way he told tony he didn't want to go when he was getting dusted GOD. AND WE THOUGHT THAT SCENE IN INFINITY WAR WAS ROUGH. HAD N O T H I N G ON THIS.

No offense but where was Rhodey when Tony was dying lmao ok

That funeral scene.... seeing everyone there drawn together..... god. It was beautiful. It really was.

Of course I'm not happy. I'm extremely fucking upset. I knew tony wielding the gauntlet would be coming, but I thought they would find a way for him to make it out alive. As soon as they were showing that even the hulk couldn't handle it with the gamma radiation, I knew the nail was going to be in the coffin.

All that aside... what I can say, is that if they HAD to kill him off, I think it was a proper send off. We saw so many arcs of Tony's come to a close, and I knew it was just a matter of time. Also that being said, I really don't believe in death being necessary to end a character's arc. Yeah yeah blah blah we get the sad and tragic but TRUE message that at the end of the day death is inevitable and that tony had to sacrifice himself for the greater good. He and Strange both knew it, and as soon as Strange held up that finger I knew that was it for him.

It wouldn't be so hard if they hadn't given us everything they did with tony after the 5 year jump. He healed. He was HAPPY. But pepper was right, and as long as Tony was alive... he would never truly /rest/. And that's the only way I'm able to make peace with this death. Tony has always been a character who was just going going going, never going to stop even if it killed him, all to protect the ones he loved, and protect the whole world and make it a better place. He had a beautiful story that was told so well over these past eleven years, with admitted shortcomings here and there. He had the most cohesive trilogy films, the best character development and arcs, and an incredible portrayal. I'm grateful for it, but that doesn't make it any easier that they decided to go and show us that Tony was able to FINALLY settle down with Pepper and see him find the best version of himself as a husband to her and a father to his little baby girl. A baby girl that now has to grow up without her dad, and pepper has to go on without her husband, the love of her life. It's fucking tragic and honestly, we didn't need that imho lmao

The hardest parts is that like.... idk. I feel like the only reason they killed him is for shock factor, but somehow without the shock? A lot of us felt or were worried that this was coming. I think the russos and co. We're just totally set on the idea that like... tony HAD to die and that was the only way for this arc to come to a close not just WITHIN the universe, but meta, outside of the MCU as well. They did the same thing with Hugh jackman as Logan and that shit HURTED me y'all. Eleven years we had RDJ give us this amazing character and he is the SOLE reason the MCU is where it is today. So you know what, the Russo's and everyone can circle jerk about how much ~poetic justice~ there is in this ending for Tony, but at the end of the day... it just ain't it fam.

Realistically I know after wielding the infinity stones there is no way Tony, a human, could've survived, even with his armor on. I knew that. And as biased as I am towards seeing Tony living, if he had wielded the stones and NOT died? It would've felt cheap. So again, if they had to end his life, I appreciate the way they did it and thought it was the best send off they could've given him. I also would've appreciated some kind of alternate option where oh i dont know carol or someone strong enough could've handled the snap and tony could live the rest of his days with his wife and daughter and found family but..... ig that's just me huh.

:(((( Happy asking Morgan what she wanted and her saying "cheeseburgers" SHE'S JUST LIKE HER DADDY I AM SO!!! UPSET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And last thought is that I fucking cried AGAIN because the biggest applause moment was during the credits when RDJ's name appeared. My theater gave a standing damn ovation. Also the very last sound after it faded to black... Tony hammering away, building the very first Iron Man suit.... that shit hurted.

If any of y'all read this and wanna yell about stuff w/ me I WELCOME YOU INTO MY DMS LMAO PLS MESSAGE ME I NEED MORE PEOPLE TO CRY WITH!!!

[paradox-oflife]

massive q and a post part 3 ignore this pls

1. If you could learn any language fluently what would it be? Um maybe latin because it sounds cool but for practical purposes probably spanish lol

2. What historical Figure would you love to see in 21st centuary life? Jesus, not because I’m Christian but I’m curious to see what he would say

3. As a kid were you ever frighted of a monster under the bed or in the cupboard? No because my bed didn’t have space underneath 

4. Do you like clowns? nope

5. Do you prefer BBC or ITV? Okay, this is clearly British but I’d go with BBC

6. Have you ever been surfing? Once. It didn’t go that well lol

7. Have you ever been snowboarding? Yeah, it’s pretty fun actually!

8. Who was better, the Beatles or Elvis Presley? uuuh the Beatles

9. Whats your favourite type of foreign food? By foreign I’m assuming non-American/British. But anything from Taiwan (except for pig’s blood ew) is soul food for me :)

10. Which Foreign country do you dislike the most? I... don’t know. North Korea I guess? But when it comes to most countries, it’s the government that makes it bad.

11. Do you like your music loud or easy listening? (What does this mean??) Depends on the mood

12. Whats your favourite animated or cartoon program? Adventure time :D

13. Do you sing in the shower? Errr, no.

14. Are you a clean or messy person? I try my best to be clean but it always ends up messy.

15. Whats your prefered playing piece in monopoly? I usually go with the cat :3

16. Can or Do you still play twister? God I haven’t played since 5th grade.

17. Can you play chess? Yeah, not really good at it though.

18. Do you know the dance steps to an annoying cheesey pop song? Haha no because I suck at dancing

19. Do you prefer straight or bendy straws? Bendy

20. Have you ever entered a talent contest? And did you win? No .-. I’m not the type to do that lol

21. Do you like poetry? Yeah. I’d say so.

22. Are you a sore loser? Nah, I’m pretty chill when it comes to that type of thing

23. Which would you choose? Jelly or Ice Cream? Ice Cream > Jelly

24. Whats your favourite type of Pie? New Zealand’s steak and cheese

25. Whats your most used phrase? Hm. Maybe “yeah nah”

26. Whats your most used word? Not sure. I talk a lot.

27. Who would you want to play you in a movie of your life? Someone Asian of course, someone who has studied me well enough and understands me

28. What would your dream job be? Okay, I’m gonna be real. I wanted to be a vet but lowkey I’m too colorblind for it lol. I’m planning to study in Physical Therapy

29. Which song do you hate the most? I mainly just listen to the same albums nowadays but I guess i don’t really vibe with a lot of pop songs.

30. How long does it take you to get ready? Depends how tired I am. If I get pretty good sleep it takes maybe 10 minutes at most. 

31. What do you think the greatest invention has been? The printing press.

32. Whats your favourite feature on the opposite sex? Uuuh i dont really know. Forearms are nice i guess

33. Whats your least favourite feature on the opposite sex? Sometimes they’re just really oblivious to really obvious things

34. Who's your favourite Comedian? I don’t even listen to comedians really but Chelsea Peretti is pretty funny.

35. What's your favourite board game? Probably Monopoly. There’s no greater feeling than seeing the life drain from your friends’ eyes as you collect $5000 from them

36. Do you have any lucky items, objects or traditions? When I’m having a bad day I like to just read through my yearbooks and look at all the compliments people wrote. 

37. Do you have any superstitions? Not really.

38. Whats your favourite Movie quote? I have a lot. But maybe Manners Maketh Man.

39. Who would win in a fight? Chuck Norris or Jack Bauer? Chuck Norris.

40. Do you have much of an ego? I wish. I want to be more confident

41. Do you wear sunglasses indoors to look cool or stylish? No. Nothing against it though.

42. Are you a hat person? Nah

43. Whats your favourite supermarket chain? Costco

44. Whats your favourite fastfood chain? Smashburger or Inn n Out

45. Whats your first thought upon waking up? “Lord help me.”

46. What animal would you most like to have as a pet? I love dogs. And cats. 

47. Whats your favourite type of tree? Pine trees always remind me of home.

48. If you could bankrupt one person or company who would it be? Uuuh as much as I want to bankrupt someone like Jeff Bezos that’d be bad because a lot of people rely on Amazon

49. If you could steal one thing without consequence what would it be? I honestly don’t know. 

50. Who's your favourite celeb with the same first name or surname as you? I don’t know much celebrities with the same name as me.

51. If evil-doers invaded your country would you rush to the battlelines to defend the motherland or hide in a box? Um hide in a box I’m so tiny. Like I know a bit of martial arts but like??? I’m literally 5′1″ and i’m only 115 pounds. Someone could bench me easily.

52. Whats your favourite flower? I like lillies 

53. Do you believe in ghosts? Im really mixed about it. I believe demons exist though

54. Do you believe in the loch ness monster? Nay

55. Do you believe in Aliens? Eeeeh kind of but when i think about aliens i think about microorganisms. 

56. Do you believe the Governments hide technology and information from the public? Yes 100%

56. Which is your favourite pokemon? Growlithe uwu

57. What horror fiction character scares you the most?  Pennywise. No thanks.

58. Can you do 10 revolutions of a hula hoop? Yeah

59. Do you think Great Britain should have a National Day? n/a 60.Do you think Great Britain should be part of a United Europe?n/a 61. Would you want the Euro or keep the British Pound?n/a

62. Were you part of the Brownies/Cubs/Scouts/Guides etc? Nah

63. Have you ever invented a fairly unique meal or drink? No I’m not that good at cooking lol

64. Do you have any secret family recipes? My family only knows how to cook asian food and well, asian food is very freestyle

65. Do you have any family secrets? :o     uuuuuh well, it wouldn’t be a secret if I said it right?

66. Are you good at keeping secrets? Yeah! You can count on me.

67. Have you ever been up in a hot air balloon? Nopenopenopenope

68. Whats your favourite Sci-fi film/program etc? ugghhhh i have so much. I like the Martian tho?

69. When playing checkers or chess do you prefer to be black or white? Black

70. Which is better, a Pastie or Sausage Roll? Sausage roll

71. Do you prefer shopping on the high street or online? Irl, I’m pretty impatient man

72. Would you ever want to learn to fly? Like, fly an airplane? Or fly as in levitate. Cause if levitate, then YES

73. Do you often read your horoscope? Nah, as accurate as they can be sometimes, I don’t really believe in astrology 

74. Have you ever had a proper Tarot reading? Eeeee no. Personal opinion, tarot cards are hella sketchy. I don’t mess with that stuff.

75. Whats your favourite brand of newspaper? Honestly at this point I’ve given up on the news. I just read stuff off of reddit sometimes.

76. Have you ever milked a cow? No

77. Have you ever used the phrase "back in my time" to someone younger than you? HAHAH one time. I realized my friend’s younger brother had never seen an iPod before and I was so baffled he didn’t even know what it was.

78. Do you love or hate rollercoasters? Love them

79. Which was the greatest Empire? Maybe Macedonian. I want to say the Romans, but god, they had a lot of problems.

80. Whats your favorite word? Catharsis.  

81. Whats your favourite sportsware brand? Adidas or Nike I guess

82. Do you buy any weekly/monthly magazines? Nah

83. Who's your favourite Superhero? uuuuh Thor 

84. Who's your favourite Villain/Baddie? Doofensmirtz. He wasn’t even bad lmao. He thinks he’s a Chaotic Evil when in reality he’s a Chaotic Good.

85. What was the last Album you purchased? I don’t purchase a lot of music tbh bc I broke, but the last album I listened to was Hot Fuss.

86. What was the last DVD you purchased? A Daria DVD I found at Walmart for five dollars.

87. What was the last piece of clothing you purchased? Some jeans.

88. When pulling crackers does everyone get one each regardless or whoever gets the big ends keeps all the prizes? I’m assuming this is some British tradition so idk

89. Do you ever make your own greetings cards? Not really.

90. Do you have a swiss army knife? I used to then I lost it.

91.At what age did you twig onto the fact Santa wasnt real? My parents never did the whole Santa thing so I always knew it was false

92. Whats your favourite fruit? Watermelon

93. Have you ever done something really unbelivable, only to have no one around to see it? Um YEAH. I was 10th grade and I was in the Martial Arts club, which was a version of Aikido. I tripped on these stairs one time going down, then I did this glorious shoulder roll and got right up. No one saw but I was so proud of myself.

94. Do you buy from charity shops? Occasionally, if I can find some. 

95. Have you ever sold your services? No

96. Have you ever raised money for charity? Yeah, it was for a school club tho

97. Have you ever won a giant sized cuddly toy from a fair? Yes uwu

98. Is the glass half full or half empty? It’s half full