#oh mini kallamar

[hakugin0]

Choose your Cult Leader!

What in Hell is Bad/Cult of the Lamb AU

Listeeeeeeen, I might be insane but they dropped the Goat and it was purple and the Lamb is red and and and- I'M NOT INSANE I SWEAR(I am a tad insane) (this is for me and like... the 3 other people out there who see the vision of insanity) Bonus info under cut 'cause this has been stewing in my brain for one whole day it's so dire (also Solorined and NariMC)

THEY'RE RED AND WHITE AND PURPLE AND BLACK HOW WAS I SUPPOSED NOT TO??? THEY'RE ALSO MY FAVOURITES THIS IS WARFARE AGAINST ME [ cough ] I mean...

The other 4 Kings as Bishops and the Seraphs as Witnesses? Who's who? dunno but a part of me says Heket!Bell ('cause famine) and Shamura!Lucifer('cause strongest ya know) (a part of me is also saying Mammon as Kallamar)

Nobles as cute mini-bosses

Solomon as Narinder and MC as his shard or something like that, bit that splinters and gets brought back as a cultist

Satan the implement of chaotic doctrines and rituals (yes, the naked dance was his idea) (big supporter of the fight pit too!)

Levi, tired, but at least everyone listens to him when he tells them to clean up, my brain wants to say he also somewhat floats (does it piss Satan off that it makes Levi even taller? yes)

Brought back NariMC, NariMC thought they'd get killed or tortured or worse;

Boom! Marriage! (you can fill in the blanks after but they suddenly needed a second mating tent)

Oh yeah also Aym and Baal are Ppyong and Minhyeok, don't even tell me otherwise

Endless fights of outdoing eachother with crusade spoils 'cause they're competitive but also NariMC praise

Bonus Solorinder and NariMC(Narijin?)

talk to me about this AU at your own discretion because I will not shut up (yes this exists mostly because I saw the Goat/Lamb/Nari polycule and went ha ha, hey that's my sillies coded... oh no)

This will not be the last time you'll see them from me

[the-s1lly-corner]

You can give followers a lamb plush... buht...what if reader... gives the bishops plushies of them.. follower bishops.. please.. looks at you with my soggy eyes

Giving the bishops plushies of themselves

I tried. anew ice cream flavor and UEUEUE it's so yummy I hate being lactose sensitive

Notes: post game follower bishops, reader is GN, written on mobile

CWs: none

LESHY

feels it with his hands to figure out what it is, making sure not to cut the thing with his claws... oh... its him! ... do you take him for a little kid? why give him such a gift-

ignoring the fact that hes going to gnash and bare his teeth at anyone who dare tries to take it away from it or so much as touch the doll without his permission

will shut you down if you offer to take it back... this is his now! no take backs! sometimes carries it around in his room

lets the fact you sat down and made something for him go to his head... ohoho was he on your mind enough that you felt the need to make something in his image?

will not let it go, and will bring it up whenever- sometimes does it to his sibling.. annoying youngest child behavior. "haha look what i have you dont have it eheh loser"

HEKET

dolls arent really her thing nowadays, but she does keep it... like shamura, she shifts it around in her hands as she looks at it. outright asks what you expect her to do with it

keeps it on her bed, but doesnt really cuddle with it... shes not much of a cuddler, in general...

will go on a small rampage if someone were to sneak into her room and steal it away, from nasty things being ripped out of her mouth to throwing anything she can get her hands on until she believes justice has been served and her gift returned

mixed feelings about it... shes so used to getting things from followers when she was a bishop, but it feels... different now

you made this out of love, not out of devotion. it leaves an odd taste in her mouth

KALLAMAR

loves it, and if you made it hes going to show off your work to everyone who will listen... and everyone who wont! he keeps it on his bed!

sometimes snuggles into it as he sleeps and will immediately bolt up to pick it up if it falls off the bed and onto the floor

if the clothes arent attached to the dolls body, expect him to ask you to make some outfits for mini him

genuinely holds the gift close to his heart... things have been so different since hes been made to join the lambs cult, so having someone dedicate so much time and effort into him feels nice and reminiscent of his time as a god

it... may go to his head a little bit... but hes not going to get overly obnoxious about it like some people

SHAMURA

they simply... stare at it for a long moment as they hold it in their hands... you almost begin to think that they dont like it- before they shift it in their arms and thank you

did you make it? because if you did, they must commend you for your work... its well made

they dont snuggle with it in their sleep, but they do keep it in their home set on a shelf or a desk... they tend to look at it a lot, it reminds them of you

takes very good care of it- keeping dust off of it and overall not being rough with it

they may not cuddle it or pour out their feelings for you, but they do truly appreciate the gift

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Let’s say in an AU were you could “recruit” the bishop after you defeated them (Basically what happened to Narinder)

Could you write some Headcanons of Hecket Dating one of the Cult members (reader) who helps her adjust to her new life. Plus, helps her reconcile with Narinder.

OH I love those AUs!! Wish we could have recruited the bishops like all the other mini-bosses, Witnesses, and Narinder

............

When Heket was first dragged into Lamb's cult, you were among the few members to welcome her.

It's a surprise, considering she remembers plaguing you and others with starvation in front of their leader as a show of power.

So it’s a rather tense and awkward first meeting for everyone, especially since Leshy is there too. She started chastising him for his failure, but Lamb put a stop to that.

She quickly realized she wasn’t above this “false god” anymore. Just a servant like you, her brother, and (eventually) her other siblings.

With nowhere else to go, she stayed in the cult and distanced herself from everybody, her arrogance barely waning. 

Lamb healed her throat out of generosity (as they also cured Leshy’s blindness), but she still despised them and barely listened to their orders.

Many were afraid to approach her. That was understandable. Yet you did so willingly, helping her adjust to life in the cult. All you asked for in return is her friendship (which she begrudgingly agrees to).

You’d take her to events in the temple, hanging out near the back. Although anytime Lamb performs the harvest ritual she just scoffs and rolls her eyes, muttering how that used to be her job.

Heket’s never felt hunger like her followers did, so she panics a little upon experiencing this for the first time. But you calm her down by sharing your bowl of food with her.

As much as she hates to admit it, Lamb’s cooking is...adequate.

She gets closer to you more and more, slowly bringing down the walls she built around herself....eventually realizing that you’re the only one in the cult who makes her happy and feel like she belongs.

When she sees a marriage ritual take place, she gets a little jealous of Lamb and their chosen spouse, wondering if you and her could have something like that.

But it’s you who made the first move, asking her out with a bouquet of autumn leaves and mushrooms. She eagerly accepts the confession, barely able to hide her smile of relief.

“Dates” consisted of doing tasks together within the cult, but during missionaries you two will venture through Anura, with Heket reminiscing over the land she used to rule.

Its residents aren’t hostile to either of you, instead bowing in her presence. And in the rooms with her stone statues, she admires them for some time before catching up with you.

Concerning the bishops' opinions on the relationship: Leshy approves 100%, Kallamar was shocked and asked “who are you and what have you done with our sister????”, and Shamura threatened you with “break her heart and I'll make a war break out within your cult”. Regardless, they came around to support you two.

When Narinder arrives on the scene, he’s beyond shook.

“Lamb wtf you never told me about this-”

"My, oh my..so the Red Crown has abandoned you at last, dear brother."

"....watch your words carefully before I cut your throat again..sister."

Yep, these two will bicker nonstop. But you'll do your best to reassure Heket that he won't hurt her again (likewise, Lamb ensures there's no heavy quarrels between the bishops and him).

Heket's gonna BEG Lamb to let them battle it out in a fighting ritual but you stop her from making such a request.

"Not everything has to end in a fight, sweetheart."

"But it's how everything begins-"

"Nope. C'mon why don't we tend to the pumpkin patch?"

"...fine."

Indeed you managed to wrap the ex-bishop of famine around your finger/claw. But she didn't mind it so much.

It's fair to say you're her better half.