#ok i made it where EITHER she knows him in a modern day verse too ?? n hes in fact /calling/ her bc they're pushed together in this universe

[ofdrivensnow]

📞 - Livia @snowalwayslandsontop

send “📞” to receive a drunk phone call from my muse.

"Livviia, y' need to list... listen to me. All of this is jus' a lieeee." he drunkenly groaned, confessing it felt like relief even if come tomorrow morning he'll want to run from it ever happening. But right now, it felt like a BURDEN had released from the heavy weight bearing down on his chest. Smiling sloppily at the relief and the sound of whisky in the bottle he was holding sloshing at his side before expressions dropped. "All jus' a lie 'cause I need someone. Elssse. I neeed to know. I need this- this girl ... Luce Gray, to be with her again. But you're jus' in my wayy. Cause I want Lucy Grabe," So drunk he couldn't even pronounce her name right, digging his fingers into his hair and skin, heavy tears wrecking his brain apart and staining down his cheeks from bloodshot blues. "I don't even know whyy you're still beinggg here, cause- I jus' really don't like you Livia. I never have and the- only reason 'mm keeping you around. It needs to be Luce Gray, though. It's s'all I think of... really," he chuckled dryly, "Making my Luce Gray, jus' mine again. So do you understandd Livi-via? Do you? Or would you like to keep pretendd-ing you're just as worthy as Luce Grace is?" he angrily hummed before he rambled more slurred words, "Or maybe you should do your best to act more like Lu-cy Gray." @snowalwayslandsontop

[welllpthisishappening]

Welllp These Are Books: the April 2021 Edition

I did not read Romeo and Juliet this month. I read a bunch of other books. Like, a bunch. More than one series. Because Big Bang burnout is real and grown adults missing their deadlines is a real good way to stress me out. So, I read a bunch. Good books, very bad books, books that caused limbs to flail. For positive and not-so-positive reasons. Naturally, all those reasons must be shared. Under the cut with occasionally long and rant-prone reviews, as well as spoilers. Beware of spoilers under the cut. Please keep telling me what to read, internet. My library wish list is almost comically long now.

GIVE ME ALL THE WORLD BUILDING AND SNARK AND FIGHTING! WITH MAGIC! AND SWORDS! IT’S MY FAVORITE THING IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD!

Shades of Magic Series by V.E. Schwab

Kell is one of the last Antari—magicians with a rare, coveted ability to travel between parallel Londons; Red, Grey, White, and, once upon a time, Black. After an exchange goes awry, Kell escapes to Grey London and runs into Delilah Bard, a cut-purse with lofty aspirations. Now perilous magic is afoot, and treachery lurks at every turn. To save all of the worlds, they'll first need to stay alive.

— Picture it, approximately twelve forty-seven am. My husband is asleep. I am reading. The second book in this series ends. And I say, right out loud, at what might now be twelve forty-eight am, HOLY SHIT IT JUST ENDED. Justin thought we were under attack. No man has ever snapped awake quicker. He was not pleased. At least not in the same way that I was about these books. Which I goddamn LOVED. Loved. The world building. The magic. The banter. Rhy and Kell’s relationship. Once more. RHY AND KELL’S RELATIONSHIP. Which I might have cared about more than the romance??? Maybe??? I cannot get over how good this world building was. I know people have quips with it, and that’s fair. I saw the “twist” coming in the first book, and I think trying to preserve that left some plot holes that are understandably frustrating. Because Lilah definitely needed depth perception to fight as well as she did. Also did Schwab really refer to her as a cross dresser in her author’s note? Yikes. She wore a dude’s jacket, like—c’mon V.E. Other than that though. I loved it. Also shout out to @peglegsjones for suggesting this one in my 2020 post and call out to me for taking so long to read it.

Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo

Ketterdam: a bustling hub of international trade where anything can be had for the right price—and no one knows that better than criminal prodigy Kaz Brekker. Kaz is offered a chance at a deadly heist that could make him rich beyond his wildest dreams. But he can't pull it off alone. . . . A convict with a thirst for revenge. A sharpshooter who can't walk away from a wager. A runaway with a privileged past. A spy known as the Wraith. A Heartrender using her magic to survive the slums.  A thief with a gift for unlikely escapes.   Six dangerous outcasts. One impossible heist. Kaz's crew is the only thing that might stand between the world and destruction—if they don't kill each other first.

— I’ve talked about how little I cared about anything that happened in Shadow and Bone before, but I kept seeing gifs of the Crows in the Netflix show and my brain was like: huh, I could like them. So, after some help from the very helpful internet, I’m happy to report I do in fact like them. At one point, I slunk into the couch. Like that’s how overcome with emotion I was. Kaz ripped a dude’s eye out! For Inej! Matthias loved Nina’s laugh! I would like to hug Jesper. Seriously, this hit all my high points and world building and banter and I lol’ed at “scheming face.” I would like my hold to come through faster on the sequel.

THEY DID NOT CALL INTERMISSION HALFTIME AND MY COLLEGE EXPERIENCE WAS WAY DIFFERENT THAN THESE KIDS

The Off Campus Series by Elle Kennedy

Hannah Wells has finally found someone who turns her on. But while she might be confident in every other area of her life, she’s carting around a full set of baggage when it comes to sex and seduction. If she wants to get her crush’s attention, she’ll have to step out of her comfort zone and make him take notice…even if it means tutoring the annoying, childish, cocky captain of the hockey team in exchange for a pretend date. All Garrett Graham has ever wanted is to play professional hockey after graduation, but his plummeting GPA is threatening everything he’s worked so hard for. If helping a sarcastic brunette make another guy jealous will help him secure his position on the team, he’s all for it. But when one unexpected kiss leads to the wildest sex of both their lives, it doesn’t take long for Garrett to realize that pretend isn’t going to cut it. Now he just has to convince Hannah that the man she wants looks a lot like him.

— The first book in this series was free on Amazon. So, I read it. And really liked it??? It was so chock full of cliches and badly written tropes and Garrett probably should have accepted that Hannah didn’t want to go out at the start, but like—he was cute? And as we all know I am TRASH™ for stories set in the same verse, so, like, I just kept reading these trashy college hockey books. Trashy is a compliment here. God, these kids had so much sex. So much. An incredible amount, really. I once had a guy tell me he was physically attracted to me, but not emotionally attracted to me in college. Like, that was my college experience. The first and second books were the best, I think. I didn’t really like Dean that much.

MAYBE IT WAS BECAUSE HE WAS A RABBI???

The Intimacy Experiement by Rosie Danan

Naomi Grant has built her life around going against the grain. After the sex-positive start-up she cofounded becomes an international sensation, she wants to extend her educational platform to live lecturing. Unfortunately, despite her long list of qualifications, higher ed won't hire her. Ethan Cohen has recently received two honors: LA Mag nominated him as one of the city's hottest bachelors and he became rabbi of his own synagogue. Low on both funds and congregants, the executive board of Ethan's new shul hired him with the hopes that his nontraditional background will attract more millennials to the faith. They've given him three months to turn things around or else they'll close the doors of his synagogue for good. Naomi and Ethan join forces to host a buzzy seminar series on Modern Intimacy, the perfect solution to their problems--until they discover a new one--their growing attraction to each other. They've built the syllabus for love's latest experiment, but neither of them expected they'd be the ones putting it to the test.

— Ok, I know that sounds bad. Again, I’m a creature of predictable habit and this was the sequel to The Roommate, which I absolutely LOVED last year. But where as the relationship in that one was kind of swoony, this one was...I don’t know, really. Everyone was a well-rounded character and the plot was good, but there was this semi-invisible something that made it difficult for me to get fully on board with the whole story. Honestly, it might be because he was a religious figure?? Also, they got together real quick. Like zero to sixty in twenty-six seconds flat.

I KNOW IT’S BAD, IT WAS BAD AND YET—I CANNOT STOP READING IT???

Too Wild to Tame by Tessa Bailey

Sometimes you just can't resist playing with fire . . . By day, Aaron Clarkson suits up, shakes hands, and acts the perfect gentleman. But at night, behind bedroom doors, the tie comes off and the real Aaron comes out to play. Mixing business with pleasure got him fired, so Aaron knows that if he wants to work for the country's most powerful senator, he'll have to keep his eye on the prize. That's easier said than done when he meets the senator's daughter, who's wild, gorgeous, and 100 percent trouble. Grace Pendleton is the black sheep of her conservative family. Yet while Aaron's presence reminds her of a past she'd rather forget, something in his eyes keeps drawing her in. Maybe it's the way his voice turns her molten. Or maybe it's because deep down inside, the ultra-smooth, polished Aaron Clarkson might be more than even Grace can handle . . .

— Last month I read the first book in this series and it was absolutely ridiculous. This one even more so. The Clarksons are still on the road trip (sans one sibling because she fell in love in a week in the first book) and Aaron was, like, not a root’able character? Very Edward Cullen I’M A BAD GUY, BELLA vibes and his relationship with Grace was so strange. Super rushed again, obvs. Meeting in the woods is weird enough. Professing love forty-eight hours later is decidedly unbelievable. Also there was a kidnapping involved? I totally put a hold on the next book in the series.

COME UP WITH DIFFERENT TRAUMA, I DARE YOU! OR NO TRAUMA. WHAT A CONCEPT!!

The Trouble With Hating You by Sajni Patel

Liya Thakkar is a successful biochemical engineer, takeout enthusiast, and happily single woman. The moment she realizes her parents' latest dinner party is a setup with the man they want her to marry, she's out the back door in a flash. Imagine her surprise when the same guy shows up at her office a week later -- the new lawyer hired to save her struggling company. What's not surprising: he's not too thrilled to see her either after that humiliating fiasco.

Jay Shah looks good on paper...and off. Especially if you like that whole gorgeous, charming lawyer-in-a-good-suit thing. He's also infuriating. As their witty office banter turns into late-night chats, Liya starts to think he might be the one man who truly accepts her. But falling for each other means exposing their painful pasts. Will Liya keep running, or will she finally give love a real chance?

— I had such high hopes for this one. Which is on me, I guess. Because I didn’t hate this one, but it was...not great. Maybe I’m just getting old and crotchety but I am BEGGING romance writers to come up with different trauma for their female protagonists. Not every woman has to have been assaulted to rationalize their current personality. Doesn’t have to happen. Like, ok, yes it does happen. Far more than it should. But that’s an entirely different story, and I am so tired of female characters getting absolutely destroyed by their past only to have that be their defining characteristic for so much of the book. Until a nice man they were initially mean to shows up and he’s UNDERSTANDING and he CARES and it’s just, bleh. It’s bleh. Tired and predictable and I’m over it.

IN WHICH I SHOULD HAVE LOOKED AT THE COVER

Much Ado About You by Samantha Young

At thirty-three-years old Evangeline Starling’s life in Chicago is missing that special something. And when she’s passed over for promotion at work, Evie realizes she needs to make a change. Some time away to regain perspective might be just the thing. In a burst of impulsivity, she plans a holiday in a quaint English village. The holiday package comes with a temporary position at Much Ado About Books, the bookstore located beneath her rental apartment. There’s no better dream vacation for the bookish Evie, a life-long Shakespeare lover. Not only is Evie swept up in running the delightful store as soon as she arrives, she’s drawn into the lives, loves and drama of the friendly villagers. Including Roane Robson, the charismatic and sexy farmer who tempts Evie every day with his friendly flirtations. Evie is determined to keep him at bay because a holiday romance can only end in heartbreak, right? But Evie can’t deny their connection and longs to trust in her handsome farmer that their whirlwind romance could turn in to the forever kind of love.

— Ok, so I had had this book on hold for so long that I genuinely forgot about it and forgot who it was written by. Samantha Young wrote that one book that I called the worst book I had ever read. Only I did not realize that when I started reading this one. So, you see how this sets us up for disaster. Because this book was a disaster. Everyone was goddamn annoying. And whiny. Shit, everyone whined. About everything. Also, the actual writing was atrocious. I am not usually one to be like “men can’t write,” but at one point I told both @shireness-says and @optomisticgirl that this book must have been secretly written by a man because no woman writing it would be so obsessed with pointing out where her cellulite was. Like, what??? Also the first sex scene? Oh my God, I laughed. Guffawed. The so-called love interest literally asked: “Are we going to have sex now?” And then they just did. It was so bad. Also there was a dog? Who went everywhere with the so-called love interest. And they just never explained that? I thought it was going to be part of some crushing and depressing backstory. Nah, he was just there.

HOLY SHIT THIS WAS SO DUMB I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS WAS A BOOK! A BOOK MEANT FOR YOUNG ADULTS! WHAT IS YOUNG ADULT???

The Queen’s Secret by Melissa de la Cruz

Lilac's birthright makes her the Queen of Renovia, and a forced marriage made her the Queen of Montrice. But being a ruler does not mean making the rules. For Lilac, taking the throne means giving up the opportunity to be with love of her life, the kingdom's assassin, Caledon Holt. Worse, Cale is forced to leave the castle when a horrific set of magical attacks threatens Lilac's sovereignty. Now Cal eand Lilac will have to battle dark forces separately, even though being together is the only thing that's ever saved them.

— Remember last month when I was like: can’t wait for my hold to come through on this sequel so I know what happens? What an idiot. THIS BOOK WAS SO DUMB I CANNOT BELIEVE IT WAS A BOOK. As always in my rage-induced rants, no apologies for spoilers because seriously do NOT read this, but Lilac (legit, that was her name) married some other dude but just kept fucking Cale??? Like she had a secret door? So he could come in and they could fuck?? I just—oh my God. So, all these things kept happening. Magic and bad stuff and horses were killed. Lilac’s mother was the absolute WORST. Honestly the most worthless character who at one point was like “well, my story is over, guess it’s time to leave,” and then just left?? Forced Lilac into a marriage of alliance and no love and then everything evil was defeated in point two four seconds. It happened so fast I wasn’t even sure it happened. So, then I’m like, ok, how are Lilac and Cale going to end up together? Because this is YA and that’s how it’s supposed to work. Only her being married and that marriage requiring an heir is something of a rather large hurdle. Don’t worry! Remember when Lilac and Cale were fucking? Everyone totally knew. Including the king Lilac is married to. Who is somehow like...ok with this? And tells Cale that Lilac is pregnant. ISN’T THAT WONDERFUL! Sure, because now they can lie and claim its the king’s heir. ONLY IT’S CALE’S KID! AND CALE IS COOL WITH THIS! His entire internal monologue during this is about how he realizes he might not ever be able to tell his kid he’s their father, but he’ll be around and that’s good. Wait, what??? But there’s more! Not only is Lilac having Cale’s kid, but the king she’s married to is in love with one of Cale’s spy associates. So the king and the spy are going to go hang out (and presumably have their own kids) at one castle and Lilac and Cale are going to go to another. Lilac and the king never get divorced or annulled or whatever. Everyone stays as is and married as is and—they all live happily ever after? This was presented as a good ending, I swear. What the shit, guys, seriously.

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh Ep 32 S4: Most Disturbing Kid’s Show Award Goes to This Episode

I often talk about how wonderfully effed up Yugioh is. What a freakin delight, how effed up this kid’s show is, somehow still remaining a Y7 kid’s show, despite everything it tries to do to get pulled off the air.

Y’all this was a filler season and it didn’t even have Bakura in it so...why did it go so edge? Don’t get me wrong, I’m thankful for how many levels of “OK THERE, KID’S SHOW” it was.

But what the hell was that, Yugioh?

Anyway we start off completely normal in this foggy ass graveyard--Halloweens in this season so I’m down for this. Halloween is also...cancelled...this year, so at least I can celebrate it somewhat in a Yugioh episode. Then again, can you imagine how many people would be dressed up as sexy Covid?

So I don’t really talk about the card game mechanics on here, and (full disclosure to any new people) I don’t know how to play this game. But, considering that this card doesn’t usually send you to distant graveyard memories IRL, lets get into it.

We’ve clarified before that Card Graveyard is a place--like an actual place--but that it isn’t the same place that the cards vibe in within the Puzzle necklace. It’s a separate place, but ALSO not the same place as the Shadow Realm, either. Card Graveyard is just...some other third place we never talk about.

TBQH I think the people who make this show have kinda forgotten how many random pocket dimensions we’ve made that are basically the equivalent of hell (including California, PS), and are just like “no one will write a blog about it and list them all in one place, we’ll be fine.”

We’ve only seen Tristan bum out here once in like S1 and he spent most of his time running away from the Grim Reaper. But, if you remember correctly, the Grim Reaper is currently hanging out and living his best life haunting some park in Japan, so now instead of the Grim Reaper it has...this?

So is this a memory stored within the card graveyard, or did Dartz literally take Raphael to the card graveyard and tell him this was a real ass graveyard?

We’ll never know! It gets very vague from here on out!

(read more under the cut)

First off, I’d like to welcome our new guest star--the Rain--there’s a lot of rain in this episode, and we animate it by just making all of our characters glow. This comes through fine in animation, but in caps I just want you to know that no one has gone super Saiyan, they’re just...wet.

PS get a gander at Raphael’s baby boy mutton chop mustache. They somehow got longer with time? And also, when soaked his hair is just as spiky. Everyone on this show has unparalleled hair gel. The real heart of the cards.

Anyway, Dartz shows Raphael a bunch of gravestones and is like “Get it???”

and me, the audience, was like “no???”

The headstones, by the by, aren’t...normal, either, they have Orichalcos symbols on them instead of words. So like...it sort of infers that his family was taken by Orichalcos, too. I mentioned before that it sorta feels like Dartz caused the whole shipwreck to munch up a bunch of yummy souls, and maybe he did in the Japanese version--cuz like...

...why else do all these headstones have Orichalcos symbols on this graveyard that you can only access through a card god like Dartz or Yami?

Just throwing that deep lore out there, and the fact that Raphael can’t really see it or understand is either because that didn’t happen or...Dartz totally killed his family, right? And that makes this relationship between the two of them extremely effed up?

This is a great show for kids with separation anxiety.

Which is...somewhat convincing of a motive for Raphael. He gives Raphael a way to move on from his trauma in the past, and it’s not a GREAT way to move on--but it’s falls in line with things Dartz has done with his other card generals by offering false redemption.

Like Mai needed to move on from her insane jealousy, so Orichalcos was her way to prove she was better than Joey Wheeler (which, honestly, no one needed proof of). Alister needed to move on from his dead brother, so Orichalcos was his way to get revenge. Valon also had a backstory but a bunch of it got deleted in the English version apparently so...

And Rex and Weevil needed...cards? I guess? I think they just needed a ride, mostly. And Orichalcos can give you a ride. It’s not like we had Uber in 2003 and clearly they were not fit for Caltrain.

And like Gurimo.............existed...?

Anyways, they’re looking for justice that they can see. Justice for their pain. To make that pain worth something for more than just suffering. A system where this type of thing can’t happen anymore. But the thing about justice is that...eh...it’s probably not done through cards that kill people.

OH OK, KID’S SHOW.

Mmmmm take in that burying up your grave imagery. Again, this show is rated Y7 for 7 year olds, and I think that’s amazing.

Anyway, this is symbolism that is so heavy handed that it really needs no explanation, so he’s just gonna dig dig dig for...days I guess? Relive his trauma over and over again? Dig up that past like you’re a popular artist on twitter and you gotta make all of your followers relive that time you got called out because you offended a hell ton of people?

(Which is so many people on art twitter right now, ps, you don’t even know which one I’m talking about because It’s SO MANY of them. Art twitter during Quarantine is like watching the fall of Rome but it’s freakin Art Twitter. Everyone’s the freakin worst and just poopin all over themselves as they roll all the way down the steps.)

But I want to know. Who’s grave this is? It has a slightly different meaning if it were his family’s or his own. I guess I’ll have to save it for the fanfiction.

And so to add another level of spook, Raphael’s card mom shows up and kinda just stands there with a sad face?

Raphael’s reaction to seeing his card just alive and hanging out was “I’ll get to you in a sec, I gotta do some unforgivable evil, first.“

WHERE DID THEY GO?

These two shots are like nearly back to back. They’re just GONE. No explanation.

And yes I’m gonna talk about the outfit because it makes no freakin sense, even for a Yugioh card. Granted, this was a show made in Japan, for kids, with a budget that had a limit. A lot of people get involved with these productions, many aren’t artists or historians versed in American History, just basic ass business people. That be TV.

But her outfit looks waaay too modern. Like she’s gonna go to a musical festival, drop acid and climb on top of a statue and take a bunch of instagram selfies and regret all of them 4 years later. If these are Atlantean cards, this is not an Atlantis outfit to match with Dartz, who has been dressed vaguely medieval. So whyyyyy would this girl be dressed more like a vague old western costume bought at a discount so she could vogue in front of installation art at Burning Man in 2008?

Anyway, I won’t even get into the bird that is slowly devouring her face as a stand in for a headdress or wtv. Just a lot of stuff happening here and I just wanna say, Yugioh did it so you won’t need to. Just delete that desire. Yugioh already did it so you are now free from wanting to draw...anything like this problematic situation on your own OCs.

And then Yugioh predicts exactly how I’d feel about this outfit.

And she then lights ON FIRE and falls dead into the grave he just buried for her.

And in case you were like “kinda on the nose there, Yugioh, that got DARK” she climbs out of his own grave with a spooky ass face and no more coconuts to share with her bros and he’s like...

Rapheal’s reaction was like...Ya OK I can get used to this, and Yami is just pointing at the scene desperately trying to follow Raphael’s brain waves.

And like, this is YAMI.

Yami just walked through Yugi Hell earlier today. He’s seen some stuff. He’s already undug his own grave this morning in a more poetic card sort of way. But Raphael’s memories of literally digging up his family’s graves with his bare hands because Dartz told him to was...stuff he didn’t want to see today. (especially since it’s super suggested Dartz was the one who...murdered them in the first place, like I know it’s a reach but...it just feels like we were supposed to reach that conclusion)

But whether or not Dartz put the bodies here or gave Raphael a bunch of phoney graves, Raphael is still essentially siding with the guy who ruined the only thing he has left of his family--this paper card mom--and turned it into an undead evil Mom. And it just had...no freakin impact on Raphael at all.

Like what?

He just murdered your card mom. This is fine?

Card shenanigans continue and Raphael eventually realizes what he should have realized like 10 years ago when he was digging up graves and killing card Mom’s. That maybe it’s a bad idea. So Raphael decides to sacrifice his remaining monsters to “free” them from the graveyard and basically commits suicide. There’s no other way to say it, really. He kills himself.

But wait, right when you figure this episode will end like every other Orichalcos fight before it...They decide not to.

Like an angel from heaven, our drunk ass looking music concert reject descends from the clouds, along with all of Raphael's dead family members!

Yeah.

I REALLY didn’t expect them to show up. This was so much content it’s like...an entire season of any other TV show. I say that a lot with Yugioh but these episodes really like to just jam-pack it in there.

And here I thought I’d actually have to take them off the Death Count one day. Here I thought 4 kids would do something to like...prevent this many dead kids, but I was wrong.

Everyone’s HELLA DEAD.

it’s both vindicating to actually say that, despite 4kids, these kids absolutely died, but also disturbing because even Raphael is like “ah, the hallucinations today are really swell, right?”

NO, GHOST CHILD.

DON’T TELL ME THAT.

And I’ve been over before how “heart of the cards” is a catch-all phrase that can mean literally anything in this show, and it’s not the first time that cards have kept someone’s spirit around. No word on his family members if they are thrilled to be trapped in a Pharaoh situation, or whether they only occasionally drop from the heavens, or whether they have actually been the spirit that was within each of these cards the whole time. I don’t know.

And so the card family “cures” one of the most evil people on this show.

He’s fine now. This guy murdered the hell out of Yugi, our main character, but don’t think nor worry about it. This isn’t the show to worry about such things.

This show has Marik.

Bro and I were talking Star Wars the other day, and mostly about the Kylo Ren arc and how a lot of people happened to dislike that particular ending. Mostly about how there is a difference between your character being redeemed and being forgiven. I think this children’s show wants to redeem Raphael, but honestly, much like Kylo Ren--he’s just forgiven. And that’s fine. You don’t need to have your characters redeemed. We can stop at forgiveness.

And also, Yami forgives him immediately because he knows he can’t throw a single damn stone, his house is made out of 2 mm of extremely problematic glass.

Man, RIP Weevil, right?

Weevil who just pretended to rip up a card that could have been Yugi and got tossed off the freakin Caltrain? Raphael got off so freakin lucky and I am boggled he’s still alive. He freakin killed Yugi!

The injustice to Weevil right now, omg. Not like I enjoy Weevil. I super don’t enjoy that character. But DAMN. Yami murdered Weevil for even mentioning Yugi. Just feels like there’s a bit of a hypocritical line here in how the justice is dished out and...that tracks for a Pharaoh so I’ll just let it go.

And also, looking at that sunshine and I’m pretty sure they’ve been up over 48 straight hours. No one’s slept since Yugi died, right? I mean Yami is fine. We know from Bakura that puzzle people don’t need to sleep, or eat, or have blood in their body. But like Seto really needs to get Mokuba to bed.

(Although I am 85% positive that Mokuba is still part Noah Kaiba so it is...also unlikely that kid sleeps anymore, just leaving Mokuba’s future therapist so much to unpack.)

The GALL of this show right now.

Of all the generals--they saved RAPHAEL? Arguably the worst one?

I would take even Alister. I would take even Weevil.

Raphael?

I mean if he ends up as the next Duke Devlin, just driving us around for the final season of this show I guess I’ll accept this but, damn.

Raphael?

Are you sure, Yugioh???????????????????????????????????

Can’t we just let that guy die? He’s basically dead already, Yugioh. This guy does NOT want to be alive anymore. Literally everyone he cares about is super dead and now he doesn’t even have Card mom because she sacrificed herself to save his soul. This GUY.

I can’t believe Mai is dead but we still have Raphael.

The same disappointment when I watch British Bake off, man, they just...sometimes they save people and I’m like...no man...that one can’t bake. Just because they pulled something off last second does not mean they get to the semifinals. Raphael can’t bake.

Anyway, the episode attempts to end on a cliffhanger but like.

Just want to reiterate how common and boring Earthquakes usually are to a Californian. This was the most normal thing in this episode.

Man.

Freakin Raphael.

Anyway, if you just got here and is like “I don’t know who the hell Raphael even is,” Yeah, I know, I didn’t think twice about the dude until like just now, but if it’s because you’ve never seen my recaps before, I’ll direct you to the link to read these in Chrono order:

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono

Anyway, stay safe and have a very happy and safe Halloween alone eating your own carmel dipped apple slices.

[nautiscarader]

2019 in animation - very selected summary

So, I dunno if anyone’s noticed, but this year was crazy strong when it comes to animation, both in terms of amount and quality of it. No matter what type you liked - traditional...

...3D...

...cell-shaded...

...hyper-realistic...

 - oh, wait, wait, no, my mistake, that’s clearly live-action. 

Anyway, no matter what type of animation is your favourite, this year gave you something. and I’m gonna go chronologically, listing those that I have been able to see. Keep in mind, day only has 24 hours, so I couldn’t see every new season or premiere (for example, I had no interest in OK KO, or She-Ra). Some spoilers below. And Gifs. LOTS OF gifs.

In January: we were still riding on the Spiderverse bandwagon from last year,, which culminated with an Oscar in February. And though as I’ve said, the movie would have worked better imho as a, say, Netflix series, as only two of the spider-people were properly fleshed out, I have to admit, it was a well-earned prize.

Then we were hit by the finale of Steven Universe, and while some complained about the another redemption of cosmic regime, it was an incredibly satisfying ending to a great cartoon... so much so that a whole movie and an epilogue series was made.

plus, it had a segment animated by James Baxter, so it’s automatic win..

January also blessed us with a reboot of another old-forgotten property, Carmen Sandiego, with her second season arriving in October. And it proved that reboots do make sense, but only if you actually do something with it. The story was fresh, creative, and yet, similar in its serialised form to capture the imagination of viewers. Also, grappling hooks for the win.

February was the month of dragons. Not only we got the conclusion of How to Train Your Dragon franchise, but Netlfix gave us second season of The Dragon Prince. While I still consider HTTYD 1 as the best movie of the franchise, as it cleverly told the story of a conflict without any obvious villain, HTTYD 3 was a satisfying conclusion, strengthened by the Homecoming special in November. 

TDP S2 on the other hand, did everything season 1 did, except better. For once, the studio finally broke their piggy bank and bought a new graphics card, so the choppy 15FPS animation of S1 is gone. The story got darker, more mature, yet whimsical, and it only made us hungry for more. Luckily, S3 was just around the corner.

March gave us season 2 of Craig of the Creek. I have to admit, I missed out on this cartoon in 2018, and it was a humongous mistake. CotC is quite possibly the most wholesome cartoon out there, telling amazing story about a boy, his friends, and his family, glorifying the mundane adventures in the creek to truly epic proportions. The family is especially important part, I do not remember a cartoon where bonds between family members were as well written as here. Definitely a must-watch if you have missed it as well.

On 8th of March, the International Women’s day, DC Superhero Girls 2019, aka My Little Pony But Humans And With Superpowers, started, and it was a blast. Creator. Lauren Faust, has once again proven that whatever she touches turns into gold. The shorts were funny, clever, and changed just enough of the DC universe to feel familiar, yet show us new, interesting scenarios. 

 In April, Missing Link had its premiere, showing that traditional, stop motion animation not only has place in modern times, but it can deliver spectacular scenes, though of course, we expected nothing less of studio Laika.

In May, one of Disney’s long-running series, Star vs The Forces of Evil had its finale, and that brings us to the first screech of the list. Many people complained about the direction the show has taken, some claiming it has gone off-track in S3, some saying it was S4 that dropped the quality. Some, like me, saw nothing wrong with it, but the finale let people dissatisfied. If anything, it was too short, and definitely could use an epilogue movie that would tie some of the remaining plot threads in something bigger than one single pan-shot. 

Rest in piece, laser puppies

Wait, they’re alive? Well, then... rest in piece, Hekapoo and her puppies.

This month also presented a first contender for this Summer’s line-up, Twelve Forever. The cartoon took us into wild, bizarre land of imagination, and offered quite a few very mature lessons about growing up and acknowledging one’s responsibilities. It also provided much needed representation, both in terms of colour and sexuality. 

Sadly, amidst scandals with its creator, the show was canned, though it’s also Netflix’s fault for not marketing it enough.

A-and maybe the show was just a tad too... creepy....

Also somewhere in May some Games might have been lost and some Thrones burned, but no one cares about it anymore. i think it was popular for a while, though.

However, 12 Forever was just a start. June gave us Amphibia, my personal top-bingeable cartoon of the year. Disney has hit a jackpot, giving us an incredibly creative fantasy show with rich mythology and enough emotional conflict to create fantastic storytelling. The only slight complain was the scheduling, as episodes aired daily, meaning the season was over by the end of the month. But honestly, the amount of humour and adventures with Anne in the forg world we got compensates that thousandfold. Book 2, coming in 2020, can only makes thing more interesting. 

Going for a hat-trick, in August we got the premiere of a cartoon that I was betting would be my personal favourite, Infinity Train... Until I learned of its schedule, even weirder than Amphibia’s. While Amphibia took a right turn, and gave us 20 episodes, a perfect amount for both plot and filler stories, Infinity Train... turned out to be a mini-series with just ten episodes, airing daily, two per night. And that, in my opinion, was a fatal mistake. Not only we now know that the story is not over, as Season 2 arrives in January, but the short episodes and its density gave very little time to leave an impact on us. If it was at least spaced out, then maybe I wouldn’t be so judgemental, but for me it was a blow that deflated the balloon I was clinging to since 2016 pilot. Still, there is more to come, and the story was more than interesting, so we’ll see if I get used to the pocket mini-story arcs.

September. Remember Steven Universe? That cartoon that ended? SIKE, HAVE A TV MOVIE. And by gods, old and new, what a phenomenal movie it was. A musical telling its own, contained story of betrayal, trust and finding yourself, based on Rebecca Sugar’s mis-adventure with a phone that reset itself... I have seen this movie at least ten times, and its OST is one I come back to constantly on Spotify. The songs are amazing, catchy, incredibly-well written, deep, and, as usual, send very adult messages about growing up and finding one’s identity, which SU was already famous for. Must watch.

Continuing the theme of reboots that actually make sense, Ducktales finished its second season after duck-bombs in March and May, with a heart-breaking story of Della Duck and humongous finale, extending DT’s universe to other Disney Afternoon shows. Season 3 promises even more, and DT is a golden standard of making a reboot that stays faithful to a more than half-a-century old material, while adding enough material to keep things fresh and funny for modern audience. What I’m saying is, Disney could really learn from Disney (pictured below).

But while some things start, some have to finish. October saw the end of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, a show that has taken Internet by the storm in 2010 and...

...okay, cringy brony things aside, this was a clever re-imagining of the decades-old property, and its popularity, especially amongst the people outside the target demography is a proof of its quality. The ending was perfectly serviceable, nothing that stood out, in my opinion, but it definitely didn’t disappoint either. MLP FiM will live in history as the cartoon about pastel tiny horses that made adult men cry and gave them enough passion to create years of of visual crack. And porn. Lots of porn.

November:  Just In case if one season of human and elf adventures was enough, The Dragon Prince Season 3 arrived in November, and it provided a thrilling conclusion to its first smaller story arc. Though I wish the season was longer, and it dived into the history of Elves’ and Humans’ animosities, I would be lying if I said I didn’t binge-watch it all in one sitting, gripping my chair. 

Do you like Green Eggs and Ham? Yes, yes, I do, Sam-I-am. Question: how do you take a classic poem, made purposefully of limited vocabulary, and turn it into a thirteen episode series with a beginning, middle, and end? The answer: You add bunch of weird stuff and the mother of all complicated backstories... at least by the original’s standards. And here’s the thing: this is the first Dr Seuss’ adaption where it works. Somehow the writers were able to stretch each verse of the famous poem into a surprisingly emotional story about friendship, losing and restoring hope, as well as following your dreams. Plus, it gave us Fargo-esque team of Bad Guys. Come on. 

And just in time for Christmas season, we were blessed with Klaus, a clear contender for a Christmas classic in my opinion. This STUNNINGLY beautiful traditionally animated original Netflix movie is a very, very clever reinterpretation of St. Nick’s mythos, telling a deep, and very realistic story of greed and selfishness, and how can one turn their life around by changing their life, one present at a time.

We’re about to end the year, so HOW ABOUT SOME EMOTIONAL TRAUMA, KIDS? Yes, Steven Universe Future is here, and from the looks of it, Steven’s problems are just beginning, since they mature with him. The show’s too real, man. However, it also provided much needed levity, giving us a familiar taste. Nothing more to say, as the show is still airing, and it will surely give us more emotional moments.   

And that’s a wrap for 2019. As I’ve said, it is not exhaustive by any means, and from the looks of it, 2020 is gonna be as packed as its prequel. So yeah, the world might be on fire, but at least we got some nice cartoon to binge-watch.

Happy new year everyone! At least I have time until 6th of January when the first episode of Infinity Train Season two arriWHAT DO YOU MEAN IT’S OUT ALREADY

[lumikinetic]

*flops down on sofa*

*exhales*

Tumblr gives me a lot of wild shit every now and again. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad, sometimes it's hilarious, sometimes it's disheartening. And then yesterday came along and gave me the one-two punch of:

Captain Marvel being dolled up by the Russos instead of a jacket, S.H.I.E.L.D baseball cap and a Nine Inch Nails shirt, which is how she should be (not gonna talk about this, just want it out there that I'm pissed about it)

One Day At A Time being cancelled

ODAAT I'm gonna kind of touch on because it's not really what I want to talk about, but it did help me finalize the words for what I do, and that's capitalism in entertainment.

The most annoying goddamn trend in filmmaking (and of course in TV and Netflix/Prime originals) is companies caring more about their bottom line and less about making good content, and yeah I know this dead horse isn't just beaten, it's thrown into an active supervolcano but it really pisses me off and it's why I hate the new Star Wars stuff (well OK hate is a bit strong but they're uh Not Good) but I'll get to that. What corpos can't seem to get into their bloated skulls is that one cannot exist without the other. You need to put out good, quality content with value so that fans like it so they give you money so they increase your profits so you can make more content and so on. But somewhere down the line some fuckhead went "what if we just pushed out what we have?" and just kinda expected us to not take notice.

Now before the comments section gets all hot and bothered because I know some people on this site don't have the gift of reading comprehension, I know profits are important, I'm saying when companies shun good filmmaking for more money, they get lazy and all they can think about is profit and not how they make that profit, they don't care at all about using that money to make more good, valuable content.

One Day At A Time

I've never watched One Day At A Time but the fact Netflix just outright cancelled it knowing damn well what it meant to the people the characters are representing is just disgusting. And they have the fucking audacity to blame it on the viewership? I've seen hundreds of artworks, gifs and a video clip here and there of this show. I've seen precisely one (1) meme of 13 Reasons Why and that is literally it. I'm not following the tags for either. Plus, #saveODAAT has, last I checked, 350k tweets on trending or thereabouts?

So obviously the viewership isn't the problem, it's the racism and homophobia of cancelling a Spanish (? - again, never seen it), LGBT+ focused show that a lot of people quite happily and positively connect with when a crap show about suicide and Friends gets to stay on. It's just ugh. Cancelling a show like this then paying something like $100mil to keep Friends. I was going to expand on the shitty capitalism here but tbh that's it, Netflix are making bad decisions and like I say, I'm only going to touch on it because it's not the main part.

Star Wars

Go watch the original trilogy and it's clear George Lucas was trying to create and do. He was trying to make art. The key difference between that and modern SW to me is BB8. Look at C3PO and R2D2 and already you can see they belong. C3PO is a translator droid and I'm not sure what exactly R2's job description is but it's obvious he does some kind of pilot assistance for X-Wing fighters. I never understood people who said R2 never did anything, because they obviously haven't seen Star Wars. You get that this is an R2 unit, right? Like, there's more than one out there and they have a job they were specifically built to do, it's just this one particular R2 unit who had to carry the message? Anyway, I'm derailing. R2 and C3PO have functions and they're clearly not new, they've been used for a long time. Then you look at BB8 and instantly it's like "this is a toy. This so called character was designed to sell toys". And then he was. He's a toy, he's on bags, notebooks, pens, clothes, everywhere. Disney is less concerned about making a Star Wars movie and more about making money off of the Star Wars name.

Into The Spider-Verse VS YA Movies

YA movies tend to suck because they were adapted from books and we all know how that pans out but the reason I'm using YA books specifically is because my mind jumped to The Hunger Games. I couldn't tell you a single fucking thing that happens in those movies. They're so dull and dead and forgettable and the characters are borderline unlikeable but you know which one I do like? Catching Fire, for one reason and one reason only: Jena Malone as Joanna Mason. Save for Haymitch, she's the only character I liked because those two are the only characters with any kind of charisma or life to them. They made an at most halfway decent attempt overall at recreating some otherwise really great books and they made a big show out of it, hiring some pretty well known names. And I'm not disparaging their performances, it was just what I call, ever since Suicide Squad came out, the Harley Quinn effect, in which good actors get given a good character and perform them really well and, through no fault of their own, fuck it up because the character was written poorly and no matter how well they act, if the script doesn't change, the performance will always be shit. The same for Divergent. And Percy Jackson. And Fault In Our Stars.

Then outside all of that you have Perks Of Being A Wallflower which is just a great, heartwarming movie because the characters feel like people and the brightness isn't turned way the fuck down in post and you actually want to be invested, and they're not afraid to have a colour palette beyond a splash of pink here and blue there and red there. Plus, Ant-Man as an English teacher. THEN you go watch Spider-Verse and oh hey. I can actually see the movie now. And I mean see it. They do not slack off when it comes to visuals. Even by animation's standards, everyone is so expressive and alive and... animated. Sorry, I couldn't get a better word but they are! When you look at Miles in comparison to Katniss in terms of writing and performance, the difference is just startling. The only times I can think of where Katniss shows any kind of emotion in the first movie is when she slams the knife in the table and Rue's funeral and I had to think about that. Without thinking for Miles, already I've got "who's Morales?", the scene where Uncle Aaron teaches him the shoulder touch, the scene where Miles spray paints in the subway, that scene in the alley, the moment in Olivia's office when he just freezes after she says she can't wait to watch Peter in immense pain Like That and made all the wlws melt in their seats. You get the idea. So what's the point for this section? Well, as simply as I can put it, Hunger Games was made with money, for money. Spiderverse was made with love, for love. Spiderverse cared about people who read comic books and paid more than enough tribute to the art forms people think of as lesser for no goddamn reason other than elitism and proved for the thousandth time that it is something that can be used in filmmaking. They were trying to make art. Hunger Games and most other YA novel movie adaptations saw a preestablished fan base they could exploit for money. They were trying to make money.

Rambo

This was a weird one, yeah. Don't worry I was confused too when it popped into my head. I saw the original Rambo a while back and what I liked about it (and Apocalypse Now) is it wasn't a war film where the USA charge in and hooray everything's all right, this movie grabs your shirt and says "hey. Vietnam did something to these guys and they're not OK. Probably they'll never be OK". Then I watched the Rambo reboot that came out in like 2011 or something and I remember thinking "OK so now he's just this dude? Who lives in Thailand... And what, that's it?" There was no scene to show his psychological state today. Nothing to acknowledge his PTSD. They just thought "hey! Let's make Rambo but this time, just give him guns and and yelling and spray some blood!" The reason I kind of ended this train of thought quickly is because I realised that, let's be real, the main body of Rambo's audience just want to see Sly Stallone kill some fools. But yeah, the fact that they just ignored John's mental state in place of mega violence is such a glaringly obvious move to just appeal to violent teenage boys.

The Auteur

My favourite director is Wes Anderson and my favourite movie is The Grand Budapest Hotel (though Panos Cosmatos seems to be eyeing these titles with Beyond The Black Rainbow and Mandy, I haven't watched them yet). Quentin Tarantino, Spike Lee, Wes Anderson, auteurs always stand out even though their movies are all the same, and I think the reason they're so successful is because that specific style is so much better than most other mainstream cinema. I'm not saying that those other movies are bad, I love them and will watch them again and again but I'm saying Wes Anderson could make a short movie and it would be better than most Marvel movies put together (don't talk to me about Captain Marvel, I haven't seen it yet. Gonna see it this Sunday). No matter what you think of these directors, you can instantly tell the difference between these movies that they care about and the passion and hard work they put in and Disney pumping out their 400th reboot.

It Keeps Working

You guys wanna know the thought that keeps me up at night? Someday they're going to make a Fortnite movie. You guys wanna know why it keeps me up at night? Because it's going to be popular. Yeah, obviously not at the box office, because it'll be a videogame movie and those are worse than book movies, but it will be popular for no apparent reason. And what pisses me off is that Fortnite's popularity is only because of the battle royale mode, which has now essentially become synonymous with dying franchises and it just adds another layer to the lack of creative effort and the movie will just be Hunger Games with guns. Exactly the same as what I said at the start of this rant, there's a really noticeable shift from making content to jumping on whatever bandwagon is passing by because you know it'll make you money. Yeah, you have to spend money to make money but that doesn't mean you get complacent in what you spend your money on or if you spend money at all because when you cut corners, consumers can see that shit.

Anyway I'm done complaining thanks for having the willpower to pay attention to my dumb opinions.

[pearlsartblog2019]

Monster Verse AU: part two

SPG Monster Verse AU: Part Two

Notes: Don’t own SPG… all of those lovelies belong to the bennetts and co. I just do strange things in stories with the characters for fun. 

Don’t own Sprocket She belongs to the very awesome: spg-fanbot-cousins.tumblr.com

Pearl Is my own creation for this and several other stories. 

Also NOTE: This is set in the 1950s yes Rabbit is a guy at this point due to it being WAAAAAY before either buns or rabbit transitioned. In the stories set in modern times rabbit will be a girl. 

Thanks for the read 

On to the show. 

"Are you sure I can't come daddy?" 

Spine turned and looked at his daughter, the little silver and black naga looked at him with huge slitted blue eyes and he sighed. 

"No sweetheart," He shook his head, "Unfortunately this could get dangerous..."

He stopped and looked into his bag again, clothing, basic supplies, and just in case his sword. Yes he was as ready for this debacle as he was going to get. On top of being to the point where he was about to drop kick Delilah out of the manor for dragging him into this. 

But she had a point. If it boiled over in japan, how long till it spread across the pacific to his city? So it was much better to go keep the  promises Morreo had made then try to get out of it. 

"It could get very dangerous and I DO NOT want you in that lil one," He turned back from his bag to her, "There is something I need you to do for me while I am gone."

He grinned at her.

Sprocket blinked up at him and tilted her head to one side, "What daddy?" 

He smiled again and reached over took off her top hat and then quickly removed his black Fedora and set it on her brown curls. " Keep my hat for me, till i get back. It'd be kinda lame looking in Japan any how."

She got an amazed look on her face and he had no doubt she'd be wearing it to bed and it would in all likelihood be squashed flat by the time he returned to the manor. But it had made his baby girl smile and that was the important thing. 

"Now you mind Salgexicon while I am gone ok?" He zipped up the bag and headed for the doorway motioning her to slink after him, "He and Peter are in charge till I get back."

"I'll be have," She promised. 

They made it to the front door of the manor where Delilah was waiting for him along with his other siblings.  Spine took a look at his family and reminded himself he was doing this to keep them safe and attempt to make peace. 

Everyone got a hug and a kiss goodbye and last of all he set his bag down and knelt down for Sprocket to come and give him a hug and kiss. 

"Be safe baby girl ok?" He kissed her cheek and gave her one long last hug.

He felt her wrap her coil around him and both arms and then kiss his cheek back and promise, "I will."

He returned the lil naga to the floor and headed out the main door into the night following Delilah and then vanishing to the waiting ship.

Sprocket sat on the doorstep a bit longer holding his hat and stared into the night, silently praying that her father would come home safe and whole. 

- One Year later-

Sprocket starred as the two of them made their way slowly up the walk from wherever the two of them had been. 

Delilah had the body language of someone that was supremely worried over someone she cared for, and Spine. He seemed to be walking slower than he should intent on something that sprocket was having a hard time making out in the growing daylight. Something he was carrying covered in a blanket. 

It was only minutes before dawn and like it or not everyone else had gone to sleep , but when the little naga had been told that her father would be returning today, there was probably no force on earth that would have been able to keep her from staying awake. 

So she sat in the window on her coils as the light became harder and harder to bear and TRIED to figure out what was going on.

She saw delilah put her hand out and touch what ever the thing was her father had in his arms and he turned to her, green eyes flashing blood red and hissed in a way that made even "the wraith" back the fuck off. 

Sprocket DESPERATELY wanted to see what was wrong and was about to go sliding out of her room and down the stairs only to be stopped by Salgexicon.

"Dont even think it Murder Spagurder," He stood in the door way and crossed his arms, " Yer dad's been through it on the trip back and needs some sleep.  YOU been up for two days worrying and need some sleep. So your both gonna GO to sleep or I go squeel to peter and he makes you sleep." ( note.. peter is a wizard and knows his whole damned family are insomniacs .. he is NOT above using a lil coaxing when needed to get em in bed) 

The lil naga looked at the wizard in the most ferocious manner she could and Hissed at him a lil. 

"I don't have to stay here! Dad's back."

the wizard softened at that, "Listen.. I know it's been a year..but he asked me to keep you here at least till t'morrow night. Kay, he's not been able to get a decent meal in about two weeks and knows he's dangerous. After some food and a good sleep, Then he'll be ready to talk ok? But you have to try to understand that he's not doing to great from this trip kiddo."

Sprocket looked down, "Was he hurt?"

Salgexicon sighed, " Yes and no, bad things happened honey. It's gonna be awhile before its ok. BUT something WONDERFUL happened too... he has something VERY precious he's gonna share with you and nobody else first.. Ok? So one more night?"

She finally deflated and calmed a bit, "I'm sorry.. i ..."

"no its ok, " He came over and motioned to the bed, then sat next to her.

"YOu have every right to be excited and worried, " The mage smiled, "He is yer dad after all. But well... things can happen sometimes that make even the most loving people in the world upset. Give him time to calm down a bit... and it will be ok. "

She nodded, "Thanks. " Then gave a jaw cracking yawn. 

" See, I told you that you were sleepy," He stood up, "Get some sleep danger noodle... things will be ok tomorrow night.. or at the very least a bit better."

"I am NOT a noodle," She huffed. 

But got into her bed curled up into a ball, and  pulled the covers over her any how. 

"G'night Salgexicon" she called as he left. 

"Night noodle," And then mage ducked out of the room to dodge the pillow tossed at him. 

The next night Sprocket was still fast asleep and it was just barely sundown, so almost no one was awake, when she heard someone knock on her door. 

"Sprocket?" 

She was instantly awake at the sound of the Deep Baritone of The Spine and instantly sat up. "Daddy!?" She rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and smiled. 

Spine's black lips split in a smile that was ear to ear and he came over to wrap her in a hug that felt like he'd been wanting to give her for a whole year. 

Sprocket hugged him back with both arms and her coil, happy beyond belief that he had finally come home. 

Spine buried his face in her brown curls for a second and just held her, "Baby girl I've missed you so much. I am SO SO very sorry I stayed away so long. I...."

She pulled away and looked up at him, "Shhhh.. Daddy its ok.  You had important things to do. I understand. " She then hugged him back ," But I am so happy to have you home. "

The Silver Lord rested his chin on the top of his daughters head and just held her for a second, "Not once did I stop trying to find a way to make it back here. But something changed Sprocket, and I couldn't leave until I knew the outcome."

"I know," She snugged him, "It's not your fault."

"Oh no, " He told her with his voice sounding very sad, "NO it is all my fault and someday someone is going to have to pay for my mistakes." He sighed, " But for now I have something very special to show you ok?" 

she nodded and let go, "Ok."

He offered his hand and led her out of the room down the hall and around the corner to his room. It was a fairly standard room. No Vampires don't sleep in coffins, even Lords like him. Just a large bed and plenty of room for his musical instruments and writing stuff.  

So Sprocket wasn't exactly sure what she was supposed to see when they went into his room. 

Then she heard it, a small soft  yawn from the bed. 

The Naga let go of her father's hand and proceeded to zip over to the bed to stare at what was curled up in the center of it. 

Huge pinkish eyes opened in a lovely face with markings similar to her father's but unique as well. A huge yawn revealed tiny perfect fangs as the tiny lil vampire girl stared up from a pile of pillows and blankets at her older sister. 

Sprocket felt her mouth hang open a second or two and turned to look at her father, then back at the tiny girl who's  pink eyes had closed in sleep again. 

Sprocket had to press both hands to her face to stifle that squeak that threatened to escape and shatter the peace of the adorable creature before her. 

"Her name is Pearl," Spine told Sprocket softly, " She's your....baby sister."

This time sprocket actually DID Squeak, but managed to keep it as quiet as possible. 

"Oh daddy! She's perfect! She's so lil! "

Spine smiled, "Yes, she will grow tho. Ahh people like myself and her grow fast."

"shes PERFECT! " She turned and then hugged spine as hard as she could, "Is this what you were hiding?"

Spine nodded, "I ahh.. had no Idea how everyone would react. Delilah did not approve of the relationship, and her mother died right after she was born.  But I couldn't leave her sprocket... the hunters... they... they would have.."

Sprocket shook her head till her curls flew all around, "you DO NOT have to explain, you are the best daddy in the world and now you have two of us to love. I love her so much already and i promise i will be the best big sister I can be !"

Spine wrapped his arms around his older child and again pressed his face into her hair, this time unable to stop his tears, "Thank you.. I was afraid..."

"That i wouldn't like her? OH daddy how could anyone not love her," she hugged him and let him cry into her for a second, "You loved her momma?"

He nodded still trying to stop the tears, "Yes baby... very  much... I.."

"Shhhh .. daddy you don't have to explain, " She hugged him more, "If you loved her momma you loved her.  So you love Pearl too, cus shes  a part of her momma and a part of you. And if She's part of you how could i not love her daddy?" 

Spine pulled away and wiped his eyes, "You are the most incredible girl Sprocket.. has anyone ever told you that?"

"Thank you," She smiled. "Is it ok for her to be sleeping this late?"

Spine nodded, "Yes, she's very  VERY young, SHe's going to need more sleep for quite a while. And she's probably hungry. If youd keep an eye on her while I go down to the kitchen? I drank everything I had up here last night."

Sprocket nodded, "They said you'd not eaten.. yah go on.. if you want to go out and hunt even I'll stay here. She doesn't seem to be inclined to move. "

"Are you sure?" He asked.

"I'm sure," She smiled, "Go eat.. then we can tell everyone else tonight or tomorrow.. when your ready. "

"Thank you," He kissed sprockets cheek, "I will be back if you need me."

The naga girl flopped down onto the pillows beside her baby sister and just stared for a while. She was still tired herself and the lil one was so peaceful... she fell asleep almost instantly. 

Later that night when Spine returned feeling much better, he found both of his baby girls, pearl protectively wrapped in Sprocket's coils, asleep on his bed. 

It was the most adorable thing he'd ever seen in his long life and because no one would have the right mind to break that up, he left them alone and went to talk about the situation with peter and the rest of the family.

[coeurxdor]

✮ ━ top three favorite muses that you’ve played♫ ━ a small playlist for a muse of your choiceღ ━ favorite canon ships for your muse(s). are there any you dislike?✄ ━ do you have any artistic abilities? If so, what can you do?

✮ ━ top three favorite muses that you’ve played 

dorcas is one of my favs lmao but her aside…. uhhh…  honestly i’m someone who generally creates a character for LIFE ( i’ve been writing some characters for nearly a decade now ) so… this isn’t easy. i’ll say  neal brar (oc), kitsey greyson (oc, i never get to write her and it’s such a shame), and valentina salgado (oc) ok fuck also tiberius ogden (oc) and malena bedford (oc) i can’t leave either of them out. 

 ✄ ━ do you have any artistic abilities? If so, what can you do?

[here]

ღ ━ favorite canon ships for your muse(s). are there any you dislike?

dorcas with any of the marauders like………………………. no thanks. never, thanks. ( MAYBE with james or peter in some au, but it’s a pretty massive maybe ). or like ships with death eaters that are completely random and have zero solid/logical foundations. 

otherwise, i’m super open with ships. i’m primarily plot based, even with my ships to be honest. i’ve been in situations where dorcas had chemistry with another character  but the plots me and the other player came up, ship-wise, just didn’t speak to me at all so even though we were supposed to “ship” because our characters had chemistry or w/e, i wasn’t really up for it.

i’ve had some nice ships with ocs from historical verses, modern royalty, and x-men verses. 

in the harry potter universe, i’ve had ships with a bunch of ocs and minor canons. think it, i’ve probably done it. i’ve had ships with muggle characters, death eaters (members or leaning), order members, journalists, diplomats, hit wizards, inventors, celebrities, etc.

all of these are old as shit and i haven’t talked to my partners in ages but thus far my most well plotted out + favourite ships/ship plots have been with:

gideon prewett - it was a friends turned lovers ship, but it was very complicated as it developed over the course of a solid 5 years and with the war gideon developed a drinking problem and there were many other mini sub-plots… it was… great, but MY kind of great with lots of character development and slow burn and it ended with them going “ok we can figure this out we’ll make a proper effort” and then gideon died like a week later lmao. ( we had a star wars au for this too )

evan rosier - met at school. they were just kids. he stopped talking to her when he was 12 because he found out she was a halfblood and she absolutely didn’t put up with his nonsense. two years later they had the chance to talk about it… and they were unable to stop talking since then, behind doors that is. they always had a very peculiar dynamic, meeting in the middle in certain aspects, being ruled by their education and backgrounds in others, and above all showing each other two very different perspectives of what would become a war ( and, in their own ways, they used the knowledge they got from each other as a sort of leverage later on - knowledge is power, so it goes ). after graduation they grew apart, then close again, then he tried to pull some really stupid things after he got married and their dynamic deteriorated considerably after that and as the war progressed. there was always going to be something there even if only given to how much they shared with each other, but i was very open about dorcas not having romantic feelings for him anymore ( and gd knows having them in the first place was an identity crisis as it was ) but my partner at the time told me he would continue to have feelings for her which made the whole dynamic even more interesting. there was always tension, and angst, and power dynamics and one time they did exchange war related information once ( they never said where their affiliations lied, but they didn’t need to at that point, to either of them it was blatantly clear ) but it was on a very particular case concerning the murder of a diplomat where both the order and the death eaters were being blamed when neither side had been involved. 

an oc auror  AND I APOLOGIZE BUT YOU’LL ALL HAVE TO PUT UP WITH ME WITH THIS ONE BC IT WAS ONE OF MY FAV DYNAMICS AND I LOVE AND MISS IT DEARLY. they met while she was still studying to be a healer, he asked her out she said yes but then life happened and they never did get to go on that date. fast-forward a year she’s working at the ministry as a secretary like five desks away from him, huffing at aurors and hit wizards for not filling their reports correctly and no she’s not going to bloody write them for you. he was awkward and self-conscious about it but there were no hard feelings about the failed date (dorcas had literally just joined the order so she had a lot on her plate anyway). very gradually they got talking, hooked up, it turned into a “oh no don’t worry about it it was nothing serious we were just blowing off some steam” which turned into “oh crap im falling in love” and eventually they started dating and it was the most wonderful thing in the world… and then like 6 months into it dorcas broke up with him because it was, like, early 1979 and every time they got together he ended up talking poorly of the order ( they broke up when, one day, he was trashing the order after, unbeknownst to him, the order had saved his ass and his partner’s ass and dorcas was just sitting there with the damn take out he had brought thinking “i really did this to myself huh fuck my entire life i have to end this”. they ended things abruptly and still very much in love. ) fast-forward some months he ends up reaching out to her somewhat awkwardly because he doesn’t know who to talk to ( he was a person of strong convictions but very private and he had grown very used to being able/feeling comfortable talking to her ). what did he want to get off his chest? that he had just discovered he had child. some 3 year old girl. the mother kept him in the dark about their daughter ( her reasons were that she didn’t think he was ever going to make a good father due to how much of a workaholic he was ) and he stumbled on the information. he ended up admitting to dorcas he desperately wanted to have a relationship with the child but didn’t know how to and long story short they started dating again, so painfully gradually and casually. dorcas wasn’t always present when he was with his daughter, but she was far from a stranger to the little girl. however, by mid 1980 the war was at its peak and dorcas was leading like 4 parallel lives and going to too many funerals - she was running on fumes and she did have an emotional breakdown once in front of him one time but it was after his daughter caught dragon pox and he assumed she was just overwhelmed and being sensitive ( he was so thrown off that while he was anxious himself he even went as far as cracking a joke about how she was the one who usually kept it together ). in early 1981 he started seeing his daughter more regularly, there was an unofficially joint custody thing going, and he wanted to take their relationship to the next level. not marriage by any means just, something more tangible and sure and clear, primarily because he didn’t want to have someone in his daughter’s life who would just not be in it for the long run. so they sat down and he told her everything that was going on inside his head, he said that it wasn’t that he didn’t trust her to be around he just needed to have the conversation with her… and dorcas was sitting there thinking “yes, this is something i want, this doesn’t scare me, this makes me happy, i love this person and i love that little girl like she was mine and i want to grow to love her and her father even more.” so she said she didn’t. she said she wasn’t interested; that he had read her wrong. she thought of the two broken ribs she had some weeks prior and how edgar and his wife and their children were six feet under. they parted away, never spoke again, and she was murdered like 5 months later in july/august. i shared ideas and hcs, but, as an active contributing writer, the story ended here for me. however, the way my former roleplay partner wrote what happened after dorcas’ death goes like this:years later, he ended up marrying the mother of his child ( they were able to reconnect in a healthy way because of how much character development he experienced while dating dorcas ). they had two other children.  around twenty years later, the dust of the second war settling and previously private information about both wars was gradually becoming public. one morning his eldest daughter was reading the newspaper and she casually asked mom and dad, sitting at the table with her, if they knew anyone who fought in the first war. they both mentioned a handful of hit wizards and aurors, and that was that - she closed the newspaper dismissively and left to meet with friends. it was summer. i can’t remember if it was later that day or the day after, but he asked her what had prompted her to ask such question and she said there was a face in the newspaper that seemed familiar. he asked her the name of the person, she couldn’t remember only that it was “funny but familiar”, and as she went to get the newspaper she continued that that neither he nor mom had said it. he got his glasses, she opened the newspaper for him in the multi-page article about new information from the first war and pointed at one of the several small moving photographs - the penny dropped as he recognized the face right away.a lot of things made sense after he found out dorcas was a member of the order, it was, in a way a relief for him to discover it because it filled in a lot of blanks ( and it made him feel better in the sense that no, he hadn’t been the problem in their relationship )… but on the other hand it was also highly bittersweet and conflicting, and he had more questions and about a thousand new feelings and emotions to process. the worst part was she had been dead for two decades so it wasn’t as thought he could talk to her about it. i think that ( i can’t remember ) at some point, in anger and frustration, he thought that she should have told him, and then he remembered what he was like and what his views of the order were and he was forced to admit to himself that if she had said anything to him, if she had trusted him with that information, his self from twenty years ago would have been highly judgmental and ended things immediately ( we had an au where this happened and it was the most horrible thing - it was right after an attack and they hadn’t even showered yet and dusted themselves off and he just told her to leave, didn’t even look her in the eye ). eventually he came to terms with her decisions and understood why she had made them and was able to tell his eldest daughter why the women in the photo looked familiar.

i don’t think i’ve had a single ship for dorcas, in any universe, where she ends up happy lmao bottoms up i don’t know how to write happy endings (unless it’s in aus) cheers.

♫ ━ a small playlist 

ok so im really really really realllly bad at playlists and i’ve already done one for dorcas here and i don’t want to make another lmao so can i make two mini ones for two of your characters instead?

for robb stark 

kids - mgmt 

fire - kasabian

everybody’s watching me -  the neighbourhood

seven nation army - the white stripes

howl - florence and the machine

afterlife - arcade fire

bonus: heads will roll - yeah yeah yeahs // pretty fly for a white guy - the offspring

for rose tyler

perfect places - lorde

run away with me - carly rae jepsen

the last of the real ones - fall out boy

drops of jupiter - train

adventure of a lifetime - coldplayp

[cafffeinations]

Pushing His Luck

A fic for the day 8/bonus prompt of @engbelgweek, ‘First kiss’!

Summary: 

What she loved most about seeing England again was the first kiss they shared, no matter how brief it was. She'd believed the feeling was mutual, but apparently it's not enough for England; "Excuse me? Are you complaining about being kissed?!" "That's not exactly what I meant-" Oh how she hates (and loves) the way he teases.

1125 words, modern day canon verse, fluff, ao3 link here!

Although she wouldn’t exactly describe England as a natural with phone technology, so inclined to grumble about people having their eyes glued to their screens and not minding where they’re going as he was, with some gentle persuasion he would nevertheless take part in video calling her, and at times even send unprompted pictures. It made her glad, because it helped to make the distance not feel as remote as it once did, especially in comparison to the many (many) moons ago when they first began to miss each other in that telling, heart aching way. Back then waiting for just a letter seemed like an age, let alone the next time they would see each other’s face.

But even with this instant technology, distance it still was, and screens paled in comparison to reuniting in person. It just couldn’t match physically being present together to embrace, to feel the warmth of his touch, and as cliché or corny it may be, what she loved most about seeing him again was the first kiss they shared. It didn’t matter if it was brief, nor did their countless kisses throughout the years make any difference; that first moment his lips touched hers always sent a warming melt right over her heart, thoughts faltering for a moment as their breaths mingled together.

She'd believed the feeling was mutual, England having mumbled something to that effect once in a softer moment. Naturally she’d teased him about being a romantic under all his gruff exterior, but it touched her to know that really. Until now at least. For apparently either she’d been wrong or he’d changed his mind, because those raised eyebrows of his as she pulled back from their kiss seemed to signal, though she could hardly believe it, a complaint.

Now granted, it hadn’t been the original plan for her to greet him at the station, but she’d managed to get a bunch of work done and shift a meeting around so that she had the afternoon free to meet him after all. It would be worth the extra work effort she figured, to see the frown and tense jaw that inevitably furrowed their way into his features when travelling lift when he saw her standing there. So worth it in fact that that she could hardly contain her excitement when she felt him cross into her country, heading to the station with a spring in her step, ready to hone in on her instinct to sense exactly where he would in the crowds of people exiting.

She positioned herself in his line of sight, and indeed as he spotted her his expression smoothed out instantly as he let out a mixture of a laugh and exhale of surprise. She grinned and hurried forward to meet him, wrapping her arms around his waist and sighing happily as his own arms brought her closer still. arms.

“Hello,” she said as softly as she could to still be heard above the hubbub around them, tilting her head upwards from his chest to help.

"Hello to you too," he replied, just before she pulled back and leaned up on her toes to press a short but sweet kiss to his lips, her eyes fluttering shut as the familiar glow of happiness hummed through her. Yet when she pulled away, mindful of causing too much of a scene for his sake, she was not greeted with a similar expression but those bemused raised brows.

“Hey, what’s that look for?” she quizzed, putting a hand on her hip as she frowned slightly.

“Oh, nothing much, I’m just a bit surprised I suppose," though she noted there was more of a playful smile twitching at his lips than any actual surprise, “that seemed rather…chaste, given that you’ve made the effort to come all this way.”

The cheek of him! She nearly scoffed, wondering just why she loved this man who was capable of winding her up so.

“Excuse me? Are you complaining about being kissed?!” she responded as indignantly as possible, but knowing there was amusement glittering in her eyes giving her away.

“That’s not exactly what I meant-“

“Well it certainly sounds like it."

“I am only stating that the length of said kiss-“

“No no, there’s no changing what you said now, I’ve heard enough!" Not that he seemed to worry too much, judging by the way he could barely keep a smirk from sneaking out. "My kisses clearly aren’t good enough for you - even though you’re the one,” and she jabbed him in the chest for emphasis, “who moans about PDA usually, and seems to have changed his tune out of nowhere.”

He tutted. “Only when it’s unreasonable and excessive.”

She harrumphed, unconvinced, but unable to recall exact evidence on the spot. “You can be such a fussy man, you know.”

He just laughed. “It's part of being so old, don’t you know.”

“Well I’ve lived long enough to be demanding too then, and I say that as I’m hurt at your criticism – oh fine,” she relented as he started to protest again, “your ‘observation’, you're going to have to really earn a second kiss now.”

He sighed with the overdramatic despair of someone facing a great injustice. “Oh dear. How about I start with,” and after he thought for a second, the smirk flattened away, “I missed you. You know I always do, but I truly mean it. And in my head I’d been planning to scoop you up as soon as you came into the room, and spin you around before sweeping you into the most wonderful kiss.”

Okay, perhaps he hadn’t changed that much after all; he really was a romantic at heart.

“You still could have done that here,” she pouted, not about to let him off that easily, “surely it’s ok to be lovingly sweet in public once in a while.”

“I know, I know. You just caught me by surprise, and I didn’t think fast enough before you were already over to me, plus there isn’t quite enough space…” and with that they both realised they were standing quite in the way of other people. England took hold of his small suitcase’s handle and wheeled it along as they started to walk away.

“Well, I guess that wasn’t a bad start you’ve made,” she mulled out loud, her tone casual, “if you keep up like that, by the time we reach my house I might just find it in myself to forgive you.”

“I do hope so,” though as he cleared his throat to continue, she suspected he knew as well as she did that of course she would, and in the afternoon ahead they would share a second kiss and many more.

[ryoshan-a]

ok. listen i know i havent been here in ages and this isn’t an original idea but hear me out:

RWBY as a live action tv series, and our characters as the actors, actresses, and crew.  

set in our world modern verse. featuring a small production company, employing and casting crew and actors from all over the world. not convinced yet? here’s why y’all should indulge me: 

your muse canonically dead or afk? not anymore!! they produce the show now. or write it. or just hang out on the set when they’re free. 

your muse a villain and hard to rp with other folk? not anymore!!! let them be pals with the most unlikely of other people. see how they deal with fndm hating their character. (or loving their char too much)

your char an oc? nOT ANYMORE. theyre canon chars now. maybe they write the show. direct. tell qrow off when he almost posts spoilers on twitter. ANYTHING

whats a crossover? the ocs you rp with are now actors/crew in their own universe’s movie/game/tv show. the chars from other fandoms are actors/crew in their source’s show/movie/game. 

your ship a rarepair u jump through hoops to put together? not anymore!! their actors are shacking up. 

lbr we’re all suffering the hiatus. who needs canon material for this!! they’re in shooting for the eps that’ll air in october. 

seriously, how easy would it be to get,, literally the entire community involved in something like this. TAG ME IF YOU DO!!! i wanna see what folk come up with!!

still not convinced? here’s some ideas i came up with, with the help of @iruzurru and @rosescattered. obv if i mention your muse and you wanna get in on this dont feel like you have to follow these!! these are just meant to inspire™

under the cut, cause lONG: 

taiyang and summer club together every year to fund a holiday for the entire cast and crew to celebrate the end of a season. they buy out an entire plane for the journeys and instigate travelling songs 

taiyang is a writer for the show who played ruby and yang’s dad more as a cameo, but got given more scenes when the character proved rlly popular 

summer is a writer too. noone, not even tai knows she’s gonna be playing summer when she shows up later in the show >:3c 

emerald and cinder being best friends who play up icly for the fans. emerald throws down on twitter with anyone who harrasses cinder for playing a baddie 

winter wasn’t an actor originally. she writes novels, but she was on set one day waiting for weiss to finish shooting so they could go to lunch. 

she was given first dibs on an audition to play weiss’ ic sister and nails it. weiss insists she’s not even acting, she’s just Really Like This 

winter writes fanfic of emerald/cinder on ao3 for shits and giggles dont @ me. noone knows its her bc she uses winter’s ic callsign as a username and ppl just assume its a winter fan

this is yang’s first big acting job, but she’s Known in celebrity circles because her mom is the Very Famous Raven Branwen.raven’s a household name 

raven subsequently gets cast as her real mom because it just makes sense and would boost the series’ popularity following her guest appearance at the end of volume 2 

qrow is very vocal about his character’s storylines and supports charities relating to substance abuse. he frequently finds himself in twitter discourse with fans because he loudly discourages romanticising his character 

this gets him accused of hating his character, which he doesn’t. fandom either loves him or hates him 

qrow and raven arent siblings but they might as well be because they’re so fking close and roast each other on twitter all the time 

neo’s actress is actually a really famous opera singer who’s breaking into acting. this gives rise to the popular fanon that neo actually can talk and has a bitchin’ voice but chooses not to. 

emerald’s an orphan. she bounced around kids homes and developed a great talent for lying in the process. hearing a drama teacher describe acting as ‘lying really well’ sealed the deal for her career choice. she’s had bit parts and lives in a shitty apartment until rwby becomes her first big break. 

coco was a big actress in france. she came to america seeking to break into hollywood, and found it pretty difficult. she’s emerald’s roommate, and it’s emerald who tells her about the opening for a member of team cfvy and pushes her to audition. 

ilia has to wear one of those green screen suits all the time so they can animate her scales. yang gets a selfie with her every time she’s wearing it. takes upon takes have been ruined by blake and sun laughing at her. 

it annoys ilia at first. then, she starts to find it funny. then, she gets her own back by purposefully making people laugh. she does the yoshi mlem every time she cracks her whip. 

pyrrha’s actress routinely gets bit parts and cameos in future volumes bc the cast and crew love her so much they want her around all the time. she’s like 50% of the reason a comedy mini-series where nothing bad happens exists alongside the main series. 

the entire cast and crew rallying around cinder after v3 when the fan backlash comes from pyrrha’s onscreen death. they throw a party after to celebrate pyrrha and cinders great performances. its a greek theme

team rwby, smartasses that they are, all come dressed as achilles with little papier mache arrows stuck in their heels

weiss is a Career Showman. she started off in ballet, then moved to broadway, then onto the bigscreen. she’s had a huge amount of success despite how young she is, and was continually pushed to land greater and greater roles. she suffered a very publicised breakdown because of the stress. 

she ‘disappeared’ in the showbiz scene when she went to live with winter in her remote little writing shack in the middle of assfuck nowhere to recharge. 

rwby is her first acting job since then. she was hesitant to start back at all, but finds herself extremely supported and refreshed by the small, close-knit production. 

blake’s had to work twice as hard for every role she’s ever landed due to being an ethnic minority. her professionalism makes her seem closed off and cold, so she hasn’t made many friends. she has a small, devoted fanbase, though.

summer is one of those fans, and has always wanted to cast blake in something. her character was written with her in mind, and summer was elated when blake accepted the proffered audition and subsequent role in rwby. 

ruby is summer and tai’s daughter!! they are not shy at all about saying that her part was written For Her. they don’t apologise for it either fuck u they created this show they cast who they want. 

the red trailer only initially existed for ruby to do a screentest of her character. it was so well produced and nailed so hard they made it promotional material and wrote the white, black and yellow ones to go with it. 

ruby grew up reading her parents’ stuff and writing her own, too. in school, she wrote, directed and produced an entire play for her classmates, but never thought of acting until her parents suggested she play the lead in this new show they’ve been thinking about. 

ruby and yang met on set. they’ve been thick as thieves ever since. 

...AND SO ON I COULD DO THIS ALL DAY GUYS 

[avani008]

More Top Fives...

@ratnananda requested top 5 Tamil/Telugu/Malayalam movies, Bottom 5 Tamil Movies, Top 5 Mani Ratnam Movies, Top 5 Kandukondain Kandukondain moments, and Top 5 Nidhana-verse Amarsena Moments.

(below the cut, because long.)

top 5 tamil/ malayalam/ telugu movies

(not counting Baahubali and KK because you guys already know about that)

1. Mahanati -- Such a wonderfully shot and acted movie, and so full of brilliant Easter eggs that yield it to repeat viewings. Also, both couples are amazing and shippable (well, until Dulquer! Gemini has his breakdown, but he’s still very compelling in the first half)

2. 24 -- This is a totally bonkers movie, but I love the aesthetic, and I love how unapologetically OTT it is--our hero has a time machine! He looks exactly like his uncle who looks exactly like his twin brother/the hero’s dad! At given moment, one of the three main male characters is pretending to be one or more of the others! HOW CAN YOU NOT LOVE SUCH A THING.

3. Thaana Sernda Kootham-- Cons with hearts of gold! A really fun and catchy musical score! Ramya Krishnan having a great time!

4. Urumi -- Oh, this is such a flawed movie, but still! I love it for the cameos alone: at any given moment, any famous actor could pop up. Also, it’s by Santhosh Sivan, so very very pretty to look at.

5. Dumm Dumm Dumm -- second favorite Tamil rom-com of my soul. *weeps*

(EDIT: How could I have forgotten Size Zero??? Most charming rom-com heroine I can remember in a long time bottom 5 tamil movies

1. Iraandam Ulagam-- you will be tempted to watch, because Anushka Shetty has a sword, and Arya is prancing around looking heroic and tragic. DO NOT. Rage inducing “ all women just need a man” and “literally rapist hero” abound.

2. Kochaidaiyaan -- the terrible CGI scares me, and I often have reasonable tolerance for that sort of thing. I think I lost it when the dolphin showed up in teh fight scene.  

3. Dashavataram-- “Oh, okay, Kamal is playing a priest in the flashback and a scientist now, and wait, why is he a random white dude, and a grandmother, and a Punjabi singer whose throat cancer gets cured by a bullet, what the hell, and --WHY IS KAMAL HASSAN PLAYING GEORGE W. BUSH???”

4. Kandasaamy -- ....Who decides they want to be a CHICKEN-themed superhero? I mean--I understand the religious references, but the man is still...a CHICKEN-THEMED SUPERHERO. Also, the “Mambo Maamiya” song makes me laugh myself to the point of tears, and not in a good way. 

5.Enthiran -- Look, you lost me when the female lead turned out to be a ditz (who CHEATED! on her EXAMS!), when the narrative actually excused honor suicides, and when the whole thing turned into a bizarro Ramayana ripoff that....was not good. 

top 5 mani ratnam movies

1. Alai Payuthey -- Can one really grow up listening to/watching “Pachchai Nirame” and not consider it the height of romance? Also I love Shalini’s prickly, passionate Shakti (one of my favorite Ratnam heroines), and also young Madhavan, OMG. What’s not to love?

2. Thalapathy-- The one sympathetic-to-Karna take that gets me (because it doesn’t gloss over the bad stuff the Karna- and Duryodhana- equivalent do, while getting rid of the very worst things wrt Draupadi. Also it doesn’t demonize Arjuna & Kunti, either.) So brilliant--and why Raavanan was so disappointing for me.

3. Roja -- I always wondered why I liked this movie, despite the chest-thumping patriotism and the kind of skeevy reluctant arranged marriage -- the gorgeous visuals and Rahman’s music could only do so much, you know. And then I read an article somewhere that pointed out it was actually a modern day take on Savitri and Satyavan, and then it all made sense, you guys. 

4. OK Kanmani -- Dulquer and Nithya just might be the most adorable couple in all creation; and this is such a lovely, frothy, lowkey romance that I can’t help but root for!

5. Yuva/Aayutha Ezhuthu-- is this cheesy? Probably. But I love idealism, and people coming together to become better, and my goodness, does this movie deliver. Also I really appreciate that the heroines are just as diverse--and usually have their own lives going on, separate from the heroes’ stuff--which is a nice change from the usual movie plotline. 

top 5 amarsena  (nidhana verse ) moments

(FWIW, this is mostly from the what was fun to write from my standpoint, and might not coincide with what anyone actually thought...)

1. Devasena’s rant in Chapter 3--I am on “team I can see why Devasena wanted to set Amarendra on fire in that scene where he’s refusing to acknowledge her feelings of confusion and betrayal” so I really wanted to write a scene where he does better, and, if not exactly agreeing with her, at least doesn’t just...sort of laugh it off?

2. The beginning of Chapter 6? It’s honestly as close to anything ~scandalous~ as we ever get, so....

3. The little conversation on the arrival in Kuntala that goes way over Mahendra’s head. This is largely because Mahendra’s confusion at and misinterpretation of pretty much everything he hears is the heart of “Nidhana” *nods gravely, collapses into giggles.*

4. The outright argument right before the battle? Because I actually really like it when couples can manage to have an argument and it’s not the end of the world--even Mahendra is upset but not, say, terrified that his folks are splitting up, and I wanted to show that they’d managed to model healthy relationships for him, as well. 

5. ...And pretty much all the domestic fluff in Chapter 1. If you haven’t noticed, domestic fluff and established relationships are some of my favorite things to write, and especially in that chapter, I felt free to let myself go wild and write all the cuteness I wanted. 

top 5 kandukondein kandukondein moments

(this is difficult! because 90% of this movie just makes me happy, and it is probably my one great comfort watch. But offhand:)

1. Konjam Minnakale is a delight, and never fails to put me in a good mood. Not only is the cinematography beautiful, but the music makes me feel as though I, too, could frolic in fields with perfect choreography while looking AMAZINGi.

2. The blink-and-you’ll-miss-it “North Indian actresses are the worst” joke at the very beginning, because yes, Tabu and Aish are both technically South Indian by birth but obviously also required dubbing, etc. 

3. THE CAT WEDDING. So random; so funny. 

4. Manohar and Soumya’s first meeting. Starts off with a classic misunderstanding where both parties are having two different conversations, but then manages also to get across Soumya’s very real guilt and grief, as well as Manohar’s automatic sympathy and feelings for her.

5. Manohar and Soumya meeting again in Madras. In part I love it because Elinor and Edward actually don’t get very much relationship development in Austen (we’re told they like each other by the narrator, and the rest of the time they’re together, it’s pretty much just angst and pining), but Tabu and Ajith sell me on their chemistry--but moreover, how much do I love Soumya just....ignoring Manohar in favor of doing her job? (and, even when just working as secretary, being very good at it. I would mention the part where she gets prompted due to sheer awesomeness, but it’s not really....one scene....but I still adore it and her so much.)

Bonus. EVERY TIME NANDINI VARMA IS ON SCREEN. FAVORITE LUCY STEELE EVER. 

[piercedfrombehind]

zerokamui wink wonk tittly donk

@heiwanoryu​ You are not explicitly mentioned but you’re getting tagged anyway because of my suspicions that anon might have had you in mind.

OK SO I FORGOT TO MAKE THIS GENDER NEUTRAL IT IS 2AM I DON’T EVEN CARE ANYMORE I’M GOING TO SAY THIS CAN APPLY TO BOTH KAMUIS EVEN IF I KEEP USING FEMALE BC I HAD SOMEBODY IN MIND SUE ME

send me a ship and i’ll tell you

who hogs the duvet

Kamui, though if she does it too much he’ll literally kick her off the bed and grab the blanket before she has time to get back up.

who texts/rings to check how their day is going

In terms of ringing, Zero is likely to ring for pointless reasons just to hear her voice, whilst Kamui prefers sending frequent texts.

who’s the most creative when it comes to gifts

At first, Kamui because Zero has no idea what to get her but once they’ve settled into the relationship, he actually goes out of his way to see if he can surprise/impress her.

who gets up first in the morning

Usually it’s Kamui, though Zero will wake up shortly after as once she’s ready for the day, she’ll return to the bed to kiss his cheek or some other chaste contact which wakes him up.

who suggests new things in bed

Zero. Though he has been pleasantly surprised before.

who cries at movies

After the first time, Zero has made sure to wear stuff he doesn’t mind getting tears on. Not that Kamui gets upset often, but if she does cry during a film her partner fully expects her head to be buried in his chest.

who gives unprompted massages

Zero. Sometimes they move onto naughtier things, sometimes they’re just him wanting to relax his lover after a stressful day.

who fusses over the other when they’re sick

More obviously, Kamui by constantly checking if he needs something. When it’s the other way around, Zero doesn’t make a big deal out of it but he will keep an eye on her and bring her soup etc. without asking.

who gets jealous easiest

Neither overly so, but Zero can be a little bit possessive if he’s in a mood so don’t be surprised if he drapes an arm across Kamui’s shoulders. Or if he’s feeling really petty he might make as many overtly sexual double entendres towards the other person as he can until they either get frustrated and leave or he receives a glare etc. from Kamui.

who has the most embarrassing taste in music

In modern verse, Kamui is into a range of things where as Zero sticks more to old school rock. Whilst they have some musical preference in common, the sheer fact that he once found Anaconda on her phone means Zero will always claim she’s the one with weird taste. Kamui claimed she was curious. Who knows if this is the truth.

who collects something unusual

Why can I see Kamui collecting pretty rocks/gems? ...Is that why My Castle has ores?

who takes the longest to get ready

Kamui, simply because her outfit is a tad more complicated.

who is the most tidy and organised

Whilst not overly messy, Zero is more likely to just dump his stuff anywhere. Or sometimes he’ll do it intentionally to get on Jakob’s nerves. Not that he’ll let Kamui know.

who gets most excited about the holidays

In terms of public holidays, Zero doesn’t see the big deal but will let himself get dragged into festivities beyond drinking if his partner pushes him enough. Everybody who pointed out the Santa hat he was forced into regretted bringing it up once Kamui was out of earshot.

who is the big spoon/little spoon

Kamui enjoys snuggling up to him from behind. On the occasion that Zero gets a particularly vivid nightmare from his past, he does manage to wake his lover up by holding her. It’s a rare vulnerable side he only really shows under the dark of night, and being able to embrace Kamui like that does bring him comfort. Trailing slightly off here, but once Zero can be ok with taking his eyepatch off once they’ve gone to bed and he’s had a dream about that subject, he’ll fumble for it until Kamui turns the light on and helps him get it back on. The eye is probably his most sensitive topic, so he’ll never be fully comfortable with it so it helps to a small extent to keep it on in that scenario.

who gets most competitive when playing games and/or sports

Assuming he’ll win, Zero loves an excuse to be able to tease the princess so of course he’ll get competitive.

who starts the most arguments

They’ll both cause issues but Zero is more likely to initiate it in some way, even if he’s not aiming to get into a fight.

who suggests that they buy a pet

As Zero would put it, why get another pet when he can just put a collar on his dragon? Which is his way of saying Kamui please don’t drag a furball in here.

what couple traditions they have

They put time aside after dinner to just read together in bed. Kamui, being more well read than somebody who only learned the skill as an adult, sometimes finishes her book before they’re anywhere near tired and if she doesn’t want to get up, she’ll lean against Zero and peer into what he’s reading. Depending on her mood, she might ask for a bedtime story which is either whatever is in his hand or the tale of the princess who became the thief’s entire world.

what tv shows they watch together

They originally watched Castle rather casually and ended up getting really invested in the story and ship. They argue about whether the pair survived the finale or not and which version is better story telling.

what other couple they hang out with

Kamui makes them hang out with all the other couples if possible. Until Zero found way too much fun in riling up Tsubaki and Hana. She became more careful about attempting double dates after that.

how they spend time together as a couple

Despite couple stereotypes, Zero doesn’t mind shopping trips. If mainly because he knows part of Kamui’s enjoyment comes from the actual exploration given her background.

who made the first move

Though not immediately, Zero. For a while he’s unsure of his feelings and even when he’s settled, he honestly believed she was (HELLO POINT I REALISED I’M USING THE WRONG PRONOUNS IT IS 2AM I AM GOING TO  KEEP GOING WITH SHE) better off with anybody else and was waiting to hear some announcement that she’d got engaged to Silas or Felicia or somebody else half way respectable and close to her. After long enough the thief decided to at least try. His usual attitude left entirely, replaced with genuine hesitance sincerity.

who brings flowers home

Usually they come from Kamui, but more so to make their room look nicer than for Zero since he’s not fussed. It’s rare but on occasion he’ll bring some for her - more so if he made her mad recently. Kana noticed and decided if his father can make Mama happy with them, he should go find some pretty flowers to.

who is the best cook

Leo once suggested that he could find a way to weaponize their combined effort in the kitchen.

[shenanigumi]

Actual First Impressions: HakuMyu LIVE 2, Act 1!

Also contains some of Act 2 for reasons. Prepare for a LOT of rapid-fire half-asleep chocolate-high thoughts, consolidated into a single super-long text post to avoid spamming and/or oversqueeing.  Good luck disentangling my observations from my emotions long enough to make any sense of either…

Atsuku Ikiro => SAMURAI Future => Yaisa! Yaisa! Yaisa! – I love this song! It’s catchy as hell and everyone gets a verse and—WAIT IS THAT SAMURAI FUTURE?!?! They’re actually quoting music from the original run?!?! Oh hey it’s Yaisa except oh my god this instrumentation is fabulous. Pieces with traditional instruments and modern beats (or really any genre of music not typically set to a modern beat) is my not-so-secret weakness. That’s why electro swing is my favorite musical genre. AAAAHHHH THIS IS SO BEAUTIFULLY ARRANGED

Sidenote: The original cast can hold their own during solos, but get them all together and they’re nothing super-special. Conversely, the new cast sounds AMAZING all together, but with a few exceptions, solos seem to be their weak points. I’m still severely biased toward the original cast in most cases, but I won’t deny that I ADORE the group numbers with the new cast.

[interlude] – Huh, the audience is even more involved than usual… must be an unwritten rule of HakuMyu that Souji is a total attentionwhore. Is that Kazama and Shiranui in the background? Are they gonna reuse the “where are they” gag from the first LIVE? Oh wait. Oh wait… What the hell is happening? What are they giving Kazama, and why? Is that pocky, or something? No, that can’t be pocky; it’s too thick. But it is edible, judging from the fact that Shiranui is feeding it to him jfc please you two or else I’m going to start headcanon-ing that Shiranui hits on Kazama to make him uncomfortable whenever he steps out of line

Okita’s song (???) – …oh thank god another musical number to break up all the confusion and awkwardness. Except I don’t really recognize this? Either it’s new or it’s from Reimeiroku since that’s the only one to which I paid like, negative attention, since I hadn’t even seen the anime and had no connection to most of the actors and. yeah. nice shoutout to his part in “SAMURAI Future”, I guess, but made somewhat less awesome by the fact that they already performed the real thing. also oh Souji you just have to blow the audience a kiss at the end too, you know you’re the favorite. ugh. insufferable child.

[SKIPPING AHEAD TO] Hisuru Hana – …my mom’s watching this with me and she really doesn’t care about most of these guys, so I’m gonna see if I can’t find Kazama to make it worth her while till she goes to bed… oh hey that’s Kazama in a demon mask isn’t it. OH HEY THAT’S HISURU HANA ISN’T IT. OH HEY THEY’RE BRINGING IN MORE SONGS FROM THE ORIGINAL RUN. OH HEY HE SOUNDS A LITTLE ROUGHER THAN USUAL AND HIS MOVEMENTS AREN’T QUITE AS SMOOTH AS IN HIS OWN MUSICAL BUT GOD DAMN.

Harada’s song (Shinsengumi Kitan) – HOLY FUCKING SHIT HARADA AND CHIZURU ARE CUTE TOGETHER HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD HE’S LIKE 50 MILES TALLER THAN SHE IS AND HE’S CARRYING HER AND HE’S DANCING WITH HER OH MY GOD HIS SONG IS LONGER NOW AND THEY’RE SO FUCKING ADORABLE THANK GODS HARADA IS GETTING A MUSICAL YES PLEASE ALSO WAY TO SUBSTANTIATE MY BULLSHIT SUPPOSITIONS THAT THEY’RE A THING IN SHINSENGUMI KITAN

[Interlude] – lolol hey it’s the idiot trio what if they do “Asonde Bakka Jyanai Ze!”?! …nah Harada already had some time in the spotlight but… wait, do Nagakura and Heisuke have any songs, just the two of them…?

Jiyū ni Narero Basho – YES, YES THEY DO! ANOTHER FAMILIAR TUNE!! One of the ones I always forget I love, too. Heisuke—good job, kid. You may not be Ikeda Junya, but I’ll allow it. Nagakura, I am thoroughly unimpressed with your voice thus far. I need to do a comparison gifset between Toudou-hen and this choreography tbfh, so much of it is a direct parallel. oh hey Heisuke’s stomach is growling!! hahaha wouldn’t it be funny if they used that to transition into—

HUNGRY GUYS => mealtime number (Shinsengumi Kitan) – FUCK YESSSS THEY’RE DOING IT!!! I LOVE THIS NUMBER OMG YES oh too bad they didn’t put the fish gag in though. Wait, did they rip this out of “Twist and Shout” by the Beatles? Oh no that’s just the transition into the roughly equivalent number from Shinsengumi Kitan. Damn they sound good together.

[Interlude] – GOD DAMN IT YOU TWO YOU ARE LITERALLY GOING TO MAKE ME SHIP RYUNOSUKE/CHIZURU JUST BECAUSE OF THIS SCENE JFC YOU’RE BOTH SO GODDAMN ADORKABLE but my mom doesn’t really care too much about Chizuru or most ships so let’s just keep right on going

[SKIPPING AHEAD WAY TOO FAST TO]—

Me: *MAKES LOUD AND SUDDEN GROANING NOISE* Mother: [annoyed] What?! Me: SHIRTLESS SHIRANUIIII Mother: …Oh.

[GOING BACK TO] the obvious femservice scene (Shinsengumi Kitan) – [here are the few semi-coherent thoughts I can remember] – fuck off Okita with your stupid suggestive water bucket – I guess at least he gets to participate this time? – please hit him with that fan Yamazaki – HOLY FUCKING SHIT IT’S SHIRTLESS SHIRANUI – HOLY SHIT – HOLY SHIT – OH MY GOD – TAKE ME NOW – oh hey also Ryunosuke who also has a literal six-pack but has to appear weak for the sake of characterization – SHIRANUI WHY ARE YOU FEELING UP HARADA – PLEASE DON’T TEMPT ME TO SHIP YOU TWO EVEN MORE UNIRONICALLY – CAMERA PLEASE – CAMERA – ZOOM IN ON SHIRANUI – PLEASE – YOU KNOW HE’S A GOOD DANCER I WANT TO SEE HIM DO THE THING – I WONDER IF HE SPECIFICALLY ASKED TO BE INCLUDED THIS TIME AROUND? – HOLY FUCK HOW IS HE JUST KINDA STAYING UPSIDE-DOWN THERE

[Interlude] – HE’S JUST CASUALLY DOING CRUNCHES AS KAZAMA ARRIVES ON THE SCENE – OF COURSE – PLEASE KAZAMA TAKE OFF YOUR CLOTHES – YOUR SHIRT – WHATEVER – I DON’T CARE – oh hey a watermelon ball, I guess that’s the new equivalent of the badminton scene? – NO SHIRANUI DO NOT PUT YOUR SHIRT BACK ON – KAZAMA PLEASE – SHIRANUI PLEASE – god damn it. [ladies and gents, my mother, voicing my scrambled thoughts – “I was kinda hoping it’d go the other way, that Kazama might…”] oh shit Amagiri’s missing again, isn’t he? Damn it, as much as I love that gag, I liked Naoya-san. Too bad he wasn’t around. But they’re probably not going to do Oni no Matsuei again, so… what next…?

Oni no Chikara – FUCK YES IT’S ANOTHER OF MY FAVORITES YES YES YES!!! wait, but if Amagiri isn’t here, why do I hear his theme—? Oh, I guess they’re just skipping it. never mind… oh and here’s Serizawa but at this point I’m really just interested in Kazama because my mom has to go to bed so

[SKIPPING AHEAD TO] Kazama’s new medley – aaaaaaaa exactly what I was looking for. Suzuki!Kazama in western wear. oh my fuck HOW can one person be so perfect. how. just. how. is it me or did they make his clothes even more form-fitting and sexier—? oh gods this is the intro to his musical!! and his singing is even more on point!!! oh shit I love that. oh hey now it’s his fight with Nagakura from Shinsengumi Kitan and they cut out his gorgeous wavering endnote on that one but whatever still a good theme. and—wait, they ARE doing Oni no Matsuei! that’s a throwback if ever I’ve seen one, but I am 100% all for more Shiranui so whatever. and—wait, “Kyōtō ~ Kyoran no Shi”? With half of Heisuke’s lines cut out? At least they slowed it down somewhat so the poor man can actually sing. And oh shit he was fighting Kodo? oh that explains why the end of “Sendai-jou no Tatakai” is happening now. and… oh gods now we’re at the end of “Bushi Toshite Ikiru Tame ni” and Hashimoto-san I love you dearly but did anyone tell you what notes to sing? NO, MOTHER, MATSUDA RYO WAS A BETTER SAITO BY A LONG SHOT, DON’T YOU DARE INSINUATE THAT HE WAS EVEN REMOTELY OFF-KEY. and ah good they’re ending it on the same set of notes, literally, as his first medley. nice way to tie it all together. good night mother

[GOING BACK TO] Saito’s song (???) – ah yes now I can record my reactions actually live instead of having to remember all that because my mother has gone to bed and I don’t mind interrupting myself. anyway this number is cool, but again, I don’t recognize it at all. did they hide it somewhere in Reimeiroku? but I like the shoutout to the instrumentation on “Don’t Forget My Style”. ok I can hear his Reimeiroku leitmotif now, so is this like, a small medley? also ok I know how childish and coincidental this is but I love that the last two lines rhyme like yessss

Hijikata’s song (???) – this kinda sounds familiar, probably from Reimeiroku. still never got the hang of Gaku-san as Hijikata, though; the notes get away from him sometimes, more often than the others I’ve heard. ya know, not that I could ever hope to sing any better while I’m doing that much but I’ve seen better Hijikatas in my day *adjusts hipster glasses*

[RELUCTANTLY SKIPPING PAST “HISURU HANA” ET AL TO] Chizuru’s song (Shinsengumi Kitan) => Ryūnosuke no Kaiko – Okay, I actually really like Chizuru’s little leitmotif, and she really does have a wonderful voice. Second or third favorite Chizuru for sure, after Tanoue Marina and tied with Yamamoto Sayaka. ooooh someone’s in loooove though, what with that Hijikata action in the background~ and OH YES THIS IS INDEED THE SONG I THOUGHT IT WAS WHEN I WAS FAST-FORWARDINGGGG oh goodness I love Ryunosuke’s little aria so much. plus the added percussion is really nice, gives it a sense of moving forward while retaining its prettiness—OH THEY ADDED MORE TO IT! and it’s so well staged! and why isn’t this man more on my butai radar I need more Shiramata Atsushi in my life. oh hey Yamazaki whatcha doing here? oh just running away I guess. it’s cool. see ya later?

[VERY RELUCTANTLY SKIPPING PAST MUSCLE SCENE ET AL TO] Gōgan Fuson’na Shi – I kinda love Serizawa? even though I also really hate him? I just feel like Kubodera Akira has a really awesome time playing the role, I mean, getting the audience involved and everything. It’s kinda cute in a super-twisted way, considering he’s busy burning everything to the ground and disrespecting everyone under the sun. seems like I have this problem with a lot of characters given that Kazama is much the same. actual favorite character, possibly actual least favorite person.

[Interlude] – here comes Kodo and… uh… THEY’RE SAYING ONE ANOTHER’S NAMES LIKE LOVERS? CRACKSHIP CONFIRMED? is there a word for pantomime that isn’t necessarily silent because I see a lot of that in butai and it’s really amazing (edit: I have since realized that pantomime is exactly the word I am looking for) and they’re physically echoing one another’s movements like a villainous courtship dance and OH MY GOD THAT HIGH FIVE AND EVIL LAUGHTER WAS REALLY CUTE A+ BROMANCE I SUPPORT THIS 100% also Kodo’s bald cap is treating him decently now

Hen Wakamizu no Chikara => Horobi no Sakebi – you cannot hope to beat Edogawa Manji in a weird-off. He is simply the best there is. What is even going on right now. He’s involving the audience in his villainous schemes and you know that pantomime thing, he’s the best at gesticulating, he really is, he’s so underrated and I have such a high respect for him and… oh, Chizuru hasn’t gotten over her emote-face, I see, and—WAIT WHAT THE FUCK. KODO-SAN WHAT ARE YOU WEARING AND HOW CAN YOU LOOK SO SERIOUS. HOW ARE THEY PLAYING THIS TOTALLY STRAIGHT WHEN HE LOOKS SO RIDICULOUS. ok maybe “respect” was the wrong word. In fact, I think I’ll just have Suzuki Shogo summarize the rest of this scene for me (since this is only the second most ridiculous Edogawa-san has looked while in-character):

Shinsengu Tanjō => Bushi no Michi ~ Ima, Kakugo no Toki [3] => Shinsengu no Michi [1] => opening track (Shinsengumi Kitan)? – ah good they’re including this. perfect!! one of their better chorus numbers, and that’s saying something—but wait—no—they’re cutting out too much of it! and now Kondou is singing Serizawa’s part?? what is this. oh but there’s Serizawa singing his beautiful little piece that I love way too much given his character. (lord help me I think I might actually understand why Ryunosuke lets him kick him around so much; the man is fascinating.) ok but all masochism aside, time to switch to sadism, since it looks like they’re gonna be killing him soon enough. and it’s well-staged, too; I love it when they do the slow-mo thing. also, yes, Ryunosuke, you can in fact sing him sweetly to sleep, ignore the fact that he’s literally trying to kill you and everyone around you. also I guess Serizawa had a semi-literal ‘Kick the Dog’ moment there huehue. and oh wow that silence was powerful. I seem to remember that being a thing in Reimeiroku too…?

[Interlude] – oh hey it’s Yamazaki. oh hey Ryunosuke that little scuttle backward you did there was adorable. oh hey you two are in really close range. oh fuck am I starting to ship this in the same way I ship Harada and Shiranui…? oh fuck. NO RYUNOSUKE BBY DON’T CRY but also thank you for distracting me from my newfound ship doubt.

Shinsengu no Michi [2] => Yaisa! Yaisa! Yaisa! (original?) – YES MORE YAMAZAKI ACTION BUT NO MORE YAMAZAKI DEATH WHY IS THIS HAPPENING but hey he’s okay now because of the Power of Chorus™ bringing Yaisa! back into the equation. I wonder whether it takes extra effort to sing different words to the same tune? because there’s a lot of that throughout the musicals, come to think of it.

INTERMISSION – HOLY SHIT IT’S YAZAKI MOTHERFUCKING HIROSHI AS A GUEST STAR BUT I REALLY NEED TO GO TO BED SO I’M GONNA HAVE TO SPLIT POSTS HERE AND HOPE YOU STICK AROUND LONG ENOUGH TO HEAR ABOUT ACT 2. GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY. it’s just as well, I can feel my thoughts getting less and less coherent eheh

Sidenote: …this “literal first impressions” thing was kinda what I was initially trying to do with the much longer HakuMyu Shinsengumi Kitan review, but this is easier for me since it’s just getting all my thoughts down and out instead of trying to do anything even remotely constructive or clever with them. Hope you enjoyed anyway!

[jasonbrennerold]

wyd if i told u to do 1-38 👀

the ‘be honest’ meme / @afterburied

ok below the cut bc this is a Long One

1. What would prevent you from following someone?

generally speaking just kinda if our writing doesn’t mesh? but also on different blogs i have different kind of vibes if you know what i mean? like here on jason i’m not likely to follow historical/extreme fantasy blogs if they don’t have some form of modern verse bc i just don’t see him in those settings, i also tend to avoid anyone who says they dont like multis/ocs even if it doesn’t apply on the blog im on bc uh we love multis and ocs here. sometimes if a blogs new i wont follow, but sometimes i will it just depends on the vibe lmao. sometimes aesthetics/etc will play a role but mostly it’s just based on rules/meshability

2. Are aesthetics important to you? If they are, why?

yes and no? like i won’t shun anyone for having “bad” aesthetics or anything, but i hold my own personal aesthetic to a higher regard? like, if someones aesthetic makes things unreadable/impossible to navigate then i hate it, but like i don’t care about other peoples aesthetic that much. if it’s pretty i definitely see the blog in a better light which im trying not to do, but mostly it’s my own aesthetics that matter to me and that’s just because i simply need to be perceived positively at all times

3. What current rp trend do you hate?

i don’t think there are any i really hate? as long as trends aren’t harmful i dont care much.

4. How do you explain rp to someone in the real world?

i don’t lmao the only person who knows about rp irl is my inner circle, and they know it as rp bc at least one of them has actually been in the rp world

5. Do you prefer interacting with male muses or female more? Why?

i don’t really have much preference? all genders bring in their own potential for different plots and dynamics and i love them all equally. but female muses and muses that don’t conform to the male/female binary are always favorites because they deserve more appreciation

6. Do you prefer writing male muses or female more? Why?

this one was actually hard to answer because like? i don’t know? i write plenty of both, and i feel like i prefer males, but also i think that’s just because of the way males tend to be treated over females? like some of my female muses are That Muse that never goes away, but because females tend to be more ignored or people just don’t read their info it’s never as fun writing them

7. What’s your opinion on call out posts?

sometimes they’re necessary, sometimes they’re not. i don’t really read them? unless it’s a callout that comes across my dash a lot or revolves around someone i know/write with. if it’s a legit predator then i say go off, but if it’s something petty or spiteful i think it just makes all parties involved look kinda bad.

8. Name any three things about the rpc that bother you.

answered here.

9. What is your opinion on exclusivity? Do you practice it? Why / why not?

i have in the past, i don’t really presently. i think sometimes it’s good and sometimes it’s bad, and really depends on the fandoms/characters involved. like currently i have lea as my exclusive stiles and earth as my exclusive carol because they have such intense connections to jason and are literally a part of his backstory/canon so it would feel really strange to have another version of that muse come along and try to either fit the dynamic or ignore it. that said i have in the past had exclusives where it felt like i was trapped in it or didn’t get to explore more dynamics because of it, so it can be a win or a lose dependent on the person you’re exclusive with and what they’re like.

10. Have you ever had a bad experience with commissions? As either someone who makes them or as someone who buys them?

not really, no. i don’t think i’ve ever actually commissioned anyone, and the people who have commissioned me in the past have generally been really nice. there’s been a few times where people really don’t know what they want or change their mind constantly or just ghost before we get anywhere, but mostly it’s been a good experience for me.

11. What do you know now about rp that you wish you knew when you first started?

that literally nothing matters. who cares. take as long as you want, remake as much as you want. yes this is a hobby that depends on other people somewhat, but that doesn’t mean that everything you do should revolve around them. take mental health breaks, write in prose, have a super minimalist or super maximalist aesthetic. who gives a shit, this is about having fun.

12. Have you been involved in drama? Do you regret it?

answered here.

13. Have you ever thought about leaving rp? What caused it? What changed your mind?

answered here.

14. Do you think rp has had a positive or negative affect on your life or you as a person?

oh a huge positive effect on both for sure. there are times that it’s been bad for my mental health, but i’ve also met so many brilliant people and had so much fun doing this. half of my facebook friends list is people i’ve befriended through rp (and yes this is an invite to anyone i talk to a lot to ask for my facebook if u want it)

15. How has rp changed you personally?

i started rping in 2012 when i was 14. rp was my main hyperfixation through high school, with me spending most days in class on tumblr rather than doing work. i shaped my entire life around rp for a long time, and while that was extremely unhealthy it was also a huge formative thing for me. tumblr and roleplaying are so ingrained into who i am at this point, it’s literally changed my life. the friends i made through rp, especially in my high school years, were a life changing thing. i had one or two friends in high school, but i was heavily bullied and widely hated and rp really did save me from really fully sinking into thinking that’s what everyone thought of me

16. If you could change one thing about rp on tumblr, what would it be? Why?

i think it would mostly just be the accessibility and ease of it? i miss the days where you didn’t have to be mutuals to write, and how it was just so easy to get things going and have meaningless fun. i love my mutuals and i love plotted threads but i truly think there was something so easy about starting a blog and immediately having threads and people to write with. lately tumblr has become a place where it’s so easy to be ignored or feel like no one wants to write with you, and i really miss the days where there was always someone there who wanted to write with you and be friends.

17. Have you ever sent a message to yourself on anon? Why?

literally all the time lmao. my positivity blog is 50% me sending myself anons because people very rarely send them in. people follow positivity blogs to hear positivity about themselves but never send any in which makes it difficult. i don’t want to seem like my positivity blog is focused only on my mutuals, but i also don’t have much i can say about non-mutuals without it feeling fake so it’s a rough balance. i also send myself anonymous headcanon questions all the time bc no one else is gonna do it for me

18. Have you ever sent hate to yourself on anon? Why?

i think i did once or twice in like 2014 because i was a 16 year old who wanted attention. mostly it was just like i’d posted something that i knew would be controversial in the fandom and wanted to send myself the hate while i had a comeback in mind rather than wait for someone else to say it and feel bad lmao

19. Do you delete anon hate or post and address it? Why?

i tend to post/address it. it’s a bummer to get anon hate and i know i should delete it but i’ll see it and be like ‘oh everyone thinks this’ so i post it so that everyone can see and be like ‘yeah’ but then they’re like ‘this is bullshit’ and i have a moment of like... oh... people... dont hate me?

20. Have you ever felt pressured to write something you weren’t comfortable with?

i dont think so, not that i remember at least.

21. Have you ever followed someone because you felt like you had to, not because you wanted to?

yeah, a few times. i tend to feel that way less now but i still do it sometimes. i know there’s not really any pressure, but sometimes breaking mutuals with people you don’t click with feels really hard

22. What would make you block someone?

not a lot, really? like not for hard blocks. i’ll softblock when i do unfollow sprees or if we don’t really mesh. i only hardblock people who spam me, personals and like. actual problematic people.

23. Have you ever stolen something from someone else?

not that i’m aware of. 

24. Have you ever had something stolen from you? If so, how did you handle it?

again, not that i’m aware of.

25. Are you open to duplicates? Why / why not?

this doesn’t apply to jason, but generally yeah. it depends on the muse really. im not open to duplicates on beth (multimuses aside) because of how she’s a comfort character for me and i’ve had some Bad Experience with other beths in the past, and theres a few muses i write from smaller fandoms that don’t have duplicates but that i wouldn’t want duplicates for. mostly though im chill.

26. How do you feel about vague posting?

i don’t love it, but i am guilty of it too. sometimes u gotta vague to get things out, but i don’t like vagues where that person is likely to see it? idk i just don’t like vagues but i wont stop you

27. Do you follow people even if they don’t follow you back?

sometimes, but not really. i used to do it a lot, but since people are so intense on mutuals only these days i get heaps of anxiety about accidentally liking something when i think we’re mutuals but we’re not

28. Do you read people’s rules before following or interacting?

i try to. a lot of people don’t have mobile friendly info (note that linking to pages on your blog like a /rules or /about isnt actually mobile friendly, you can’t use those links in the app) and i spend a lot of time on mobile, but i usually just wont follow back until i can read them and then i double check rules for triggers and stuff whenever plotting/sending memes/etc.

29. What is your opinion on “reblog karma” and do you practice it?

i don’t love it and i don’t practice it, but i get it. it sucks to have people reblog things from you without sending, especially headcanon/ooc stuff. i won’t ever force people though, especially with ic stuff, sometimes certain memes just don’t fit and that’s okay.

30. How have you responded to popular slang used on tumblr? Do you use it in every day life? Do you use it at all?

probably? i type the same as i talk pretty much, anything you see me type is something i’d say

31. Is there something you don’t know the meaning of but you haven’t asked anyone because you think it’s supposed to be general knowledge? Was there ever something you had to ask someone to explain?

i dont think so. generally i google things if i don’t know it.

32. Have you ever experienced discrimination?

not that i’m aware of. i guess people ignoring female ocs and loving male canons might sorta be it, but nothing personal about me no

33. How do you feel about personal blogs following your rp blog?

not a fan, tend to block them. personals just tend to get into my shit and rb stuff and it’s annoying. that said, if it’s someone i know from the rp community’s personal they can stay

34. Have you ever cried while writing a reply?

literally all the time. every angsty reply.. i cry so easily

35. Do you read other people’s threads or do you only read your own?

i read so many other peoples threads, especially people i interact with a lot. i read @unheaven and @aphostate‘s threads like the morning paper i love them

36. What’s one thing that other people seem to hate that doesn’t bother you?

i don’t know that anyone really hates things that much?? oh, but 13rw is a big one i guess. the show helped me mentally and i have muses on my multi, but i know the majority of the rpc is very much against it

37. How do you feel about tagging triggers? Do you tag them? How do you determine what is triggering content and what isn’t?

i try to, but i don’t ever really know when exactly things need to be tagged. i use the ‘ask to tag //’ tag a lot for things that im not sure about. generally speaking triggers go untagged unless it’s intense/graphic, but there’s always warnings in my rules about what i don’t tag

38. What advice would you give to someone new to rp?

don’t take it too seriously. it’s a hobby, it’s for fun. these people will not care if you use aesthetic vibes or if you’re a minimalist, they just want your writing. don’t guilt trip people into writing with you, read and respect rules. i don’t know, just treat people how you wanna be treated. rp is a small world, word travels, people know when people are the type to ignore important things. 

[oury-boros]

can't stop thinking abt how super pissed off that one performance of mack the knife is at ppl who steal from marks & spencers. like seriously dude, that's your direct lead in to cops? chill out

(note: I don't think the list of people Mack is begging mercy from is meant to be in ascending order of evilness. but the way the music is intensifying as he's singing REALLY gives the impression that aside from cops, shoplifting girls are at the top of his shit list. like, ok, so it's tramps -> dealers -> pimps -> disposal men -> pocket pickers -> girls who give the world a glimpse of inviting tights and lurid snickers (rly had a paint an image on that one huh mack) -> needle boys -> drug dispensers -> kids who (??? tbh I'm writing this from memory cause i can't find the recording I'm talking about) -> GIRLS WHO STEAL FROM MARKS & SPENCERS. then the cops get their own section where mack kinda resets but with more tension at the beginning and goes back up until he is SCREAMING at the police and DAMN i can make fun of mack and his over the top hypocrisy all day every day but i canNOT fault the music in this show, this shit HITS, genuinely makes me like mack for like, three whole minutes. mack said acab but clearly didn't mean it considering his bff is a cop and he relies pretty heavily on the police protecting him up until they can't at which point he condemns them. did I mention he's a hypocrite?)

also this post has no discernible point anymore aside from the general topic of Macheath Begs for All Men's Forgiveness so can we PLEASE talk about

I won't cast judgement on your morals

That's not the way I want to be

I'm sick and tired of picking quarrels

I'll pardon you, you pardon me

Let heaven smash your fucking faces

Slash you and let the blood run free

And break you in a thousand places

I've pardoned you, you pardon me

Like??? Mack. My dude.

also actually let's abandon this song too because thIS WHOLE VERSION IS EXCELLENT

Ok so I'm talking abt the production from the 90s (I seriously CANNOT find the one I mean), which seems to place 3p in the modern era, but I've only ever heard the cast recording, so it's easy to forget that until suddenly mack is screaming in your ear abt crooked cops with:

Mercedes

Mobile phones

Trendy jackets

And I LOVE it

A few of the songs get things either more faithfully translated than the 60s version or add some stuff on?? Like idk if the original 3p featured abortion in tango ballad but shit does the 90s knock shop tango make that experience visceral, not to mention the pauses in the song where mack is doing the street vendor "hey come get our products" thing but, y'know, pimping out his then-(maybe?)-wife (btw I have no clue what her name is. Jenny? Is it jenny? There's a jenny but I don't know if tango is that jenny, but I have heard one version where he called her jenny)

ALSO ALSO ALSO I guess ballad of dependency (or sexual dependency or w/e but tbh the first time I saw it live, it was just "dependency" and mrs. peachum was drinking heavily throughout which rly added to the irony and the theme of rich & poor ppl having the same sins and the only difference is that the rich get away with it and honestly that themes a lot more clear in the beggar's opera bc that was john gays whole point whereas brecht was doing his usual anti-capitalism thing, and I honestly get super conflicted on this bc I prefer gay's storyline but he's clearly also just emerged from all the way up the royalty's butt and that's only bc he didn't get the position he wanted, and they're fundamentally different stories anyway bc gay's Captain Macheath is a poor thief literally WORKING FOR mr peachum and his crimes are stealing, gambling, having sex with multiple women, and having multiple wives (over time) whereas brecht's Mack the Knife is still a thief but the syndicate is his and he's become rich off it and thus his crimes are much worse: murder, rape, cannibalism (tho i don't remember if cpt mack is innocent of that and also tbh i remember a lot less abt gay's version in general bc hot take but the songs in 3p are better), etc, so ultimately which story you prefer is probably gonna be based on whether you want Macheath to be an immoral but lovable jerk who's just a pawn, or an immoral murderer & rapist who has connections in high places WHICH BTW IS ACTUALLY THE ROLE PEACHUM FILLS (PARTIALLY, AND JUST THAT LAST PART) IN BEGGARS, LIKE, LITERALLY "TIGER BROWN" IS FROM THE CHARACTER "LOCKIT" WHO IS PEACHUM'S CONTACT INSTEAD OF MACK'S AND AGHHH TOO MANY TOPICS) takes place later in this version than the one I saw? Bc there's a verse abt the moment one of the prostitutes turned mack in and it's like

The fog recedes

He starts to understand

There's thirty bits of silver in her hand

He's almost glad that she's been paid

LIKE??? I know I said earlier that Macheath Begs for All Men's Forgiveness was the only time I like mack in the show, and that's true, but this moment??? made me feel a little BAD for him

o shit that also reminds me of the bit in the 60s version (can you tell im mainly talking abt translations but don't know the names of the translators WHOOPS) of solomon song

Forgotten all that he had won

He trusted us and was undone

His melting heart put him on the spot

I was thinking about reforming

Guess not

and the "melting heart" thing is probably actually his lust or w/e but "HE TRUSTED US AND WAS UNDONE" FUCK DUDE!! THATS THE KIND OF LYRIC THAT MAKES A RICH DICK BRIEFLY LOOK LIKE A HUMAN PERSON

anyway the moral of this post is that im still reeling from the revelation that brecht didn't want to write an adaptation of the beggars opera, but his other ideas were shot down and his wife was working on translating it so it was on his mind.

[johnchiarello]

Sunday sermon

Sunday sermon  12-16-18

 1Corinthians 10:13 There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.

https://youtu.be/tuPBUII-jLw Real Life- Church Unlimited

https://ccoutreach87.files.wordpress.com/2017/07/7-2-17-real-life-c-u-verses.zip

https://ccoutreach87.com/7-2-17-real-life-c-u-verses/ 

 ON VIDEO-

.Real Life Church- Church Unlimited

.David and Bathsheba

.The sin

.The scheme

.The judgment

.The other son is born

.The prophets

.Avoid materialism

 Blog- www.corpuschristioutreachministries.blogspot.com

Facebook- https://www.facebook.com/john.chiarello.5?ref=bookmarks

Youtube- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZ4GsqTEVWRm0HxQTLsifvg?view_as=subscriber

Other sites- https://ccoutreach87.com/links-to-my-sites-updated-10-2018/

 Today [12-16-18] I will re-post a past Sunday sermon- as far as I know the video links are good.

Later today I will try and post the video I make to YouTube and Facebook- I will probably be speaking on the verses for the mass for this date- as well as the verses from the Local Church I attend. Hopefully the new video cloud sites are working ok- you should be able to download the past teaching videos from those sites. I’ll be finishing up our 2nd Samuel study soon- the one I have been posting during the week- and am not sure what the next study will be. Eventually I hope to start a new study on another book of the bible-

 Ok, that’s it for now-

  Thanks, John

 Other videos- [these are the videos I post nightly to my various sites]

 12-10-18 Teaching- Furman and the bird https://youtu.be/KpkjRiBHtpg

12-13-18 Update https://youtu.be/8g4r6vF_jBw

https://www.facebook.com/john.chiarello.5/videos/10205115302800410/

see it to believe it https://www.facebook.com/john.chiarello.5/videos/10205115480644856/

https://youtu.be/7Pjp8893jI8

Another 1 https://ln.sync.com/dl/09c115fb0/5j24sxyn-acqyxda9-yzj6urpr-b42y27u4

https://www.facebook.com/john.chiarello.5/videos/pcb.10205115575007215/10205115536366249/?type=3&__tn__=HH-R&eid=ARBRhuYHwinzWoZiBQCWOQ4nGZpUCwJo7Y0iiFmttiTF9NyuGLD19eBQJ1nsb0Oy_JEGOKhMYv5ubSxo

 12-8-18 A talk between the Father and the Son [parable] https://youtu.be/Kn9MTgC1QOg

https://www.facebook.com/john.chiarello.5/videos/10205097588277558/

Does God exist? https://mega.nz/#!iW523QZZ!68TdkeTUXGSl1NPjA4Gudlmg_uwvueJqnEnzh3TxAkQ

The lake [North Bergen- N.J.- view of NYC skyline] https://bit.tube/play?hash=QmXXSDPbRhiLbf9JXTucUePEHtqhSefcrj3yKyBux63cCe&channel=160276

Isaiah 61 https://www.dropbox.com/s/ltjx14b5vtttril/3-4-17%20Isaiah%2061.mp4?dl=0

Kings 17 https://1drv.ms/v/s!Aocp2PkNEAGMdDGvaPNxP9Hgz3E

The unknown God https://youtu.be/wZeEPrdyZ20

Samuel 19 https://www.bitchute.com/video/nufsajIHfW17/

Acts 3 Alamodome- San Antonio https://mega.nz/#!ebRl1IYI!Vl28NVWsFbNwu2Cqq7UkkIGX_sZP9G278UWp6c5a5m8

Acts 1 https://1drv.ms/v/s!Aocp2PkNEAGMddxUWpVS9RrGHjM

At the doors https://youtu.be/GI8PSYPjCW8

1-14-18 Sunday sermon https://1drv.ms/v/s!Aocp2PkNEAGMeMlCArzzEG7ZgL0

2nd Samuel 21 NYC view- North Bergen- N.J. https://bit.tube/play?hash=QmXSABcWgJpnruxjchJ2y8EbD8atTfctVGrMVPNRqqJLmk&channel=160276

Hook up the truck! https://youtu.be/8Yiwx4r3LjE

Plymouth Rock https://flic.kr/p/ES9TYY

Christian- Muslim dialogue https://1drv.ms/v/s!Aocp2PkNEAGMeb-Izqhz78bdVGI

Mark 3 https://www.dropbox.com/s/9ml9cechvsvcpk2/3-3-17%20Mark%203.mp4?dl=0

Wal Mart and creation https://youtu.be/PTMTrQDpeus

Galatians 5 https://1drv.ms/v/s!Aocp2PkNEAGMejbeju1g4BLexRc

Bus to NYC https://bit.tube/play?hash=QmdDXYtysG89dqXuLx7XizFyTrLwZkBbWfJZfiZoyigDBd&channel=160276

7-22-18 Sunday sermon https://dai.ly/x6yeybx

Furman and Bill https://ln.sync.com/dl/5022ea000/sicjnmri-mvzq6gyp-rga7k23w-hefectmp

Sunday sermon https://ccoutreach87.com/2018/12/09/sunday-sermon-35/

 2nd Samuel 23 https://ccoutreach87.com/2018/12/13/2nd-samuel-23/

  PAST POSTS- [Today I spoke on the bible chapters from Real Life church and Church Unlimited- below are my past teachings on those chapters. I also added links to my complete studies on those bible books- and other links that relate to the post- verses below]

http://corpuschristioutreachministries.blogspot.com/p/1-st-2-nd-samuel-8821-st-samuelintro.html

http://corpuschristioutreachministries.blogspot.com/p/1st-2nd-samuel-links-updated-3-17.html

http://corpuschristioutreachministries.blogspot.com/p/james-2015-video-links-included-james-1.html 

https://ccoutreach87.com/house-of-prayer-or-den-of-thieves/

https://ccoutreach87.com/galatians-links/

https://ccoutreach87.com/1st-2nd-corinthians/

https://ccoutreach87.com/james-2015/ 

SAMUEL 17- David goes down to the battle front and hears Goliath mocking God. The Philistines are confronting Israel and they have their champion giant [almost 10 feet tall! Like the Roman emperor Maximus, he was huge] Goliath. David hears the enemy challenge Israel day after day and he decides to take him on. Saul tells him ‘you can’t do this, you are too young and inexperienced, he is a man of war from his youth’! David insists that he is able, he killed a lion and bear while defending his fathers sheep, why not ‘this uncircumcised rascal’! Saul says ‘fine, hears my armor’. David tries it on and realizes it’s not his style of armor. He goes back to the simplicity of a sling and stone. He goes out to the battle, Goliath can’t believe his eyes ‘did you send me some mammas boy with a stick? I am not some dog that you can tame with a stick’! Oh really? David says ‘sir, not only will I win this thing, but I will remove your stinking pagan head from off that 10 foot frame and feed you and your buddy’s carcasses to the animals’! Old Saul must of been thinking ‘what in the world did we get ourselves into’? Sure enough the battle begins and David runs up to the giant and sinks a stone into his head. He stands over him and severs his head with his own sword. Now the poor Philistines heard the whole conversation and didn’t want to hang around for the rest of David’s mission statement to be fulfilled. They fled! Israel pursues and has a great victory. A few things; David show us the necessity and simplicity of warfare. Jesus taught the disciples that they had what it took to carry out the mission. He warned them not to fall for the wrong headed idea of ‘God has called us to start an organization, and the organization will accomplish this noble task’. After all the years of befriending and working with the homeless and down and out. I realize that many well meaning believers will see the needs of people, but then want to ‘put on Saul’s armor’ to effect change. Try and start another mission ministry, or make others aware of the problem. I have found the biggest need to be that people are simply not willing to actually give their time and substance and get involved. Jesus told the disciples ‘don’t think you need a lot of extra equipment for this, you are the equipment. No special appeals for funds!’ [Message bible]. We get lost in trying to put on Saul’s armor [lot’s of complicated ministry ideas] when Jesus says ‘just use the stone and sling that I have given you’. The church of Jesus needs to realize that the power to effect society is in the hands of simple followers, truly the meek will inherit the earth.

 2ND SAMUEL 11- David sends Joab and his men out to war. He stays home and takes a walk on his roof and spots Bathsheba. He sends a servant to contact her and he sleeps with her. He finds out she’s pregnant and the gears in his mind start moving. He calls her noble husband, Uriah, from the front lines of battle and pretends he just called him to inquire about the battle. He sends him home, hoping he will sleep with his wife, and then David will be off the hook. Sure enough Uriah is so noble that he refuses to sleep in his house when his men are in the battle. So David gives it a second shot and gets the brother drunk. He sends him home again and Uriah refuses to sleep with Bathsheba. So David calls for Joab, the lead commander of his army, and says ‘put Uriah in the front lines and draw back and let him die’. Something interesting happens. Joab carries out the plan but also allows some of David’s other men to die. Then he sends a messenger to tell David ‘we were at the front lines, close to a wall, and some of our guys were killed’. Joab tells the messenger ‘if David gets mad and says “what were you thinking by getting close to the wall? This is a basic mistake that should have never been made!”’ Joab says if David asks this, then say ‘Uriah is dead too’. It’s possible that Joab stuck it to David here for making him partake in his personal problems. Military men do not like carrying out personal political vendettas. Either way the messenger goes and tells David and David feels he covered up his sin. Of course we will soon find out the cover up didn’t work. Bathsheba does move in with David and they make plans for the coming baby. A few things; David was a great man, he followed God as a man ‘after Gods own heart’. David was also human. Hebrews says ‘every high priest taken from among men must make sacrifice for his own sin as well as the peoples’. I don’t want to excuse sin, but I want you to see that all of us have ‘feet of clay’. Modern ministry has a system where we present the best image of leadership to people. We feel this is part of the role of leaders. The scriptures show you ‘the good, the bad, and the ugly’. We just saw the ugly.

  (931)2ND SAMUEL 15- Absalom sits daily at the city gate and when the people come to the king, Absalom ‘steels their hearts’. He says ‘o, if I were the king I could do such a good job. I am better than the one God appointed’. Avoid trying to gain peoples acceptance by comparing yourself with others. God might use you to be an example in some way, but this is a matter of grace. Paul said he excelled more than the other apostles who were ‘in Christ’ before him, but nevertheless it was Gods grace that caused this to happen. Absalom slowly wins the hearts of the people and stages a takeover. Some men go willingly, others followed ‘out of simplicity’. They were led astray like sheep. Remember, when dealing with followers of groups who have ‘rebelled’ [classic cults] some have been raised innocently with their beliefs. Try and honestly talk to them and treat them courteously. God can give you an open door with them if you see them as people who have value and worth. We see David as a type of Christ in this chapter. He is forsaken by the city of Jerusalem and loses his following. He even ascends the Mount of Olives while weeping! He says ‘If God chooses to forsake me, so be it. But if he brings me back again [resurrection!] and allows me to see the Ark in Jerusalem, then let his will be done’. Jesus said ‘not my will, but thine be done’. The Father, who forsook his Son, did delight in him and ‘brought him back again’ to see ‘the Ark in the city of Jerusalem’. Jesus saw the tabernacle of God [Gods people, the dwelling of God] in ‘the city of God’ [the church is called the city of God that comes down from God out of heaven] and he was restored to his former place of exaltation at the fathers right-hand. David is reaping some stuff here. He makes some plans for a future return to leadership, but recognizes when it’s time to retreat. Now, I realize that God wants us to move forward and ‘take the kingdom by force’. But Jesus also gave us a principle; he said ‘when one king is facing another king. He sends out messengers to check out the opponent. If word comes back that you are really out of your league in this battle, then try and come to terms of peace if possible’. In essence there are times where taking a step back and re-evaluating is a wise thing. David plants a few spies in Jerusalem who will report back to him every now and then. David also finds out who his true friends are. Some follow him instead of Absalom, even though Absalom is the ‘hot ticket item’ at the time. These brothers who stick with you till the end are true friends, but they aren’t always the most encouraging. Thomas [one of Jesus disciples] says at one point ‘Lets go, we might as well follow him all the way to our deaths’. Thanks for the willingness to follow Thomas, but you think you could change the attitude a little! So David is doing the best with what he has, Gods people are surviving, but they are being used as pawns on Absalom’s chess board. Absalom looked good at the start, but he will not finish well.

 (932)2ND SAMUEL 16- As David flees Jerusalem, Ziba, the servant that was under Mephibosheth joins with him. David asks ‘what are you doing here? You should be home with your master’. Ziba says ‘as soon as Mephibosheth heard about the take over, he said “I will stay in Israel and become the new king, God will restore to me Saul’s throne”’. Now David believes it and says ‘I now put you in charge of all the household of your former master, it belongs to you’. Later on Mephibosheth will deny all of this. Its possible Ziba made this up for his own benefit. Leaders, be careful of advice from people with a personal agenda. They often make themselves look better than others. Now as David flees another enemy comes out and curses and throws stones at him along the way. This guy says ‘look at you now, you rebelled against the old king [Saul] and now you are receiving the just reward’. Now David responds with a Christ like attitude and says ‘let the guy curse me, I will not retaliate. Maybe God will look on this persecution and reward me’. One of David’s men wanted to ‘take his head off’. Gee, David has all types in his leadership circle! Did this guy who was cursing David misread the whole situation? Yes, but don’t forget we are reading this story from the real perspective, some people living at the time of David and Saul saw this new king [David] as a threat to the old ways. It’s only a few days after the 2008 presidential election. Barack Obama won. Though there were many reasons for and against him, now that he won we ALL need to pray for him. But some of the supporters of McCain sincerely saw this ‘new kind of person’ as a rebellious threat to the ‘old order’. Sincere people who saw things from a different angle. So David’s accuser sees the story from a wrong lens. David was being judged by God, but not because he toppled the old order of King Saul. Back at Jerusalem Absalom listens to the advice of Ahithophel and sleeps with his fathers concubines. The advice was that when all Israel heard about it, they would realize that this rebellion was a real rebellion and the people would unite under his illegal rule. Scripture says Ahithophels counsel was like ‘hearing from God’ in those days. Leaders, be open to the counsel that is coming forth from particular streams at certain times. It is not only important for believers to ‘learn the bible’, but also to be able to discern the signs of the times. Specific things God is saying and doing in our day. If you were living in the 16th century the issue of the reformation was vital for every one who was a believer. Whether you were Catholic or Protestant, you needed to be up on the issues. Erasmus, the great Catholic scholar and humanist [not ‘secular humanist’] wrote insightful criticisms against his own church, yet remained within her fold. So matter what Christian tradition you align yourself with, you need to be aware of the seasons and purposes of God for your generation. In Absalom’s day, Ahithophel was the go to man.

 (934)2ND SAMUEL 17- Absalom is strengthening his position as the new king. Ahithophel, his chief counselor, advises to strike while the irons hot. He tells Absalom ‘let me gather a 12 thousand man army and quickly pursue David. I will come upon him and his men while they are tired and fearful, then I will kill David only and bring the people back to you’. Now, this advice was the best, but Absalom asks for the advice of Hushai also. He was the secret spy that was really on David’s side. He advises Absalom to wait and gather all the people and mount a broad attack. God put it in the heart of Absalom to believe the bad advice [bad for Absalom, good for David!]. So Ahithophel sees that his counsel is rejected, he goes and hangs himself! Once again we see the ‘sword of David’s enemies enter into their own heart’. Remember what we said earlier about this? So Hushai sends word to David about the plan and David responds accordingly. Leaders, understand the strategy of our mortal enemy [satan]. He wants to target you when you and your people are weary and tired. He wants to take you down more than any other thing. The bible teaches ‘smite the shepherd and the sheep will be scattered’. Now this is a Messianic prophecy with a lot of meaning, but one of the points is the lead ‘point man’ is usually the main target of the opposing side. How can we mitigate this factor? Practice plural leadership as much as possible. The new testament churches were not ‘run by a Pastor’ in the way we do it today. So adjust your leadership paradigm and bring it more into alignment with scripture. Also, spread ‘the wealth around’ [a recent key issue with the newly elected president, Barack Obama]. If you can get the wisdom and truth that God has communicated to you into the hands of many others, then you have accomplished a lot. Paul told Timothy ‘the things that you have learned and been assured of, commit to faithful men who will be able to teach others also’. This is true apostolic ministry. David will survive this rebellion against his kingdom, but if Absalom listened to the best counsel David would have been finished for sure.

 (935)2ND SAMUEL 18- David and his men regroup and mount a counter attack against Absalom. They divide into 3 groups and go for it. David tells his men ‘take it easy on Absalom’. Why? Understand that David is seeing the prophetic judgment upon his family that was a result of his own sin. I wonder how many times David saw the fulfillment of this former word [the sword will never depart from your house] thru the seeming insignificant acts of Absalom along the way. David felt guilt over this whole rebellion mounted by his son. Now the battle rages and David and his men kill around 20 thousand troops of Absalom. Word gets back to Joab that Absalom got his hair caught in some tree and is hanging in the tree. Joab says ‘why didn’t you kill him!’ the messenger says ‘God forbid that I should kill the king’s son! I heard the strict orders from the king for no one to take his life’. My King James Version says Joab responded with ‘I may not tarry thus with thee’ in today’s terms ‘I can’t waste time listening to your reasoning’. Joab goes and kills the king’s son. When I read thru this chapter earlier this morning I saw 2 possible things here. First, Joab and his history with David are one of Joab being a ‘bloody man’. He killed Abner against the king’s wishes, and now Absalom. Why in the world did David not remove Joab from this position earlier? One reason, Joab knew how to war. The boy was capable; he knew how to get the job done. In ministry [or business] loyalty is important; people need to be able to carry out the decisions of leadership. But loyalty in and of itself doesn’t cut it, you need skills and abilities as well. You say ‘that’s not fair’ well if you don’t have the skills go get them for heavens sake! Proverbs says knowledge is in the street corners calling out to the simple and saying ‘come, receive of my learning’. The resources are there, laziness prevents people from accessing them effectively. Now Joab also acted responsibly to some degree. He realized that Absalom would be a permanent threat to David’s rule, he killed him and saved many. Right after his death Joab blows the trumpet and the battle is called off. 2 Messengers run to bring the word to David. Ephesians says ‘blessed are the feet of those who bring the gospel’ Gospel simply means ‘good news’. In the New Testament this good news was the reality of Jesus death, burial and resurrection [1st Corinthians 15] but in the Old Testament it was simply the news from ‘the runner’. You could tell from the way the runner was running whether the news was good or bad. How? Say if your wife took a lotto ticket that said ‘you one a million dollars’ and said ‘I am going to ask the store clerk if it’s real’. As you are waiting in the parking lot you see her coming out of the store. Do you think you would be able to tell if the news was good or bad by watching the way she approaches the car? So this was what the king looked for as the messengers came running. If they bore good news their feet had this special pep to them. News gets back to David and he is broken over the death of his son ‘O Absalom, my son Absalom. Would God I had died in your place’ I always stop and meditate this verse every time I read it thru my yearly reading thru the bible. This contains the heart of the Father in redemption. A few more things; in this chapter it said that Absalom raised up a monument/pillar after ‘his own name’. Because he didn’t have any sons to carry on his legacy, he left ‘a thing’ that would honor his name after he died. Absalom didn’t simply have a rebellion issue against his father, he really wanted to build for himself a legacy. His motivations were self serving. Jesus warns the leaders of his movement not to approach ‘church and ministry’ with the same ‘gentile’ [worldly] concepts of leadership. The world often succeeds thru the motivation of greed and lust and power. It’s very easy to fall into the Absalom mindset and take it out on Gods people when the ‘pillar’ [the thing of ministry] doesn’t ‘go up right’. Many well meaning sincere men have been side tracked into seeking fame and acceptance by seeing ministry thru the lens of ‘I want to leave some institution that will bear witness to my name after I am gone’. Ministry, according to Jesus, does not operate along these lines. In Absalom’s obsession to become famous in the eyes of men, he went down a path that did leave a memorial to his name for generations to come. We just read it.

  VERSES- [These are the verses I taught or quoted on Today’s post- Real Life- Church Unlimited]

Galatians 6:7

Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap.

In Context | Full Chapter | Other Translations

Ephesians 6:12

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.

In Context | Full Chapter | Other Translations

1 John 2:16

For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of theFather, but is of the world.

In Context | Full Chapter | Other Translations

James 1:14

But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed.

In Context | Full Chapter | Other Translations

James 4:7

Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

In Context | Full Chapter | Other Translations

Jeremiah 1:4 Then the word of the LORD came unto me, saying,

Jeremiah 1:5 Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.

Jeremiah 1:6 Then said I, Ah, Lord GOD! behold, I cannot speak: for I am a child.

Jeremiah 1:7 But the LORD said unto me, Say not, I am a child: for thou shalt go to all that I shall send thee, and whatsoever I command thee thou shalt speak.

Jeremiah 1:8 Be not afraid of their faces: for I am with thee to deliver thee, saith the LORD.

Jeremiah 1:9 Then the LORD put forth his hand, and touched my mouth. And the LORD said unto me, Behold, I have put my words in thy mouth.

Jeremiah 1:10 See, I have this day set thee over the nations and over the kingdoms, to root out, and to pull down, and to destroy, and to throw down, to build, and to plant.

Psalm 37:4

Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

In Context | Full Chapter | Other Translations

  1Samuel 17:1 Now the Philistines gathered together their armies to battle, and were gathered together at Shochoh, which belongeth to Judah, and pitched between Shochoh and Azekah, in Ephesdammim.

1Samuel 17:2 And Saul and the men of Israel were gathered together, and pitched by the valley of Elah, and set the battle in array against the Philistines.

1Samuel 17:3 And the Philistines stood on a mountain on the one side, and Israel stood on a mountain on the other side: and there was a valley between them.

1Samuel 17:4 And there went out a champion out of the camp of the Philistines, named Goliath, of Gath, whose height was six cubits and a span.

1Samuel 17:5 And he had an helmet of brass upon his head, and he was armed with a coat of mail; and the weight of the coat was five thousand shekels of brass.

1Samuel 17:6 And he had greaves of brass upon his legs, and a target of brass between his shoulders.

1Samuel 17:7 And the staff of his spear was like a weaver's beam; and his spear's head weighed six hundred shekels of iron: and one bearing a shield went before him.

1Samuel 17:8 And he stood and cried unto the armies of Israel, and said unto them, Why are ye come out to set your battle in array? am not I a Philistine, and ye servants to Saul? choose you a man for you, and let him come down to me.

1Samuel 17:9 If he be able to fight with me, and to kill me, then will we be your servants: but if I prevail against him, and kill him, then shall ye be our servants, and serve us.

1Samuel 17:10 And the Philistine said, I defy the armies of Israel this day; give me a man, that we may fight together.

1Samuel 17:11 When Saul and all Israel heard those words of the Philistine, they were dismayed, and greatly afraid.

1Samuel 17:12 Now David was the son of that Ephrathite of Bethlehemjudah, whose name was Jesse; and he had eight sons: and the man went among men for an old man in the days of Saul.

1Samuel 17:13 And the three eldest sons of Jesse went and followed Saul to the battle: and the names of his three sons that went to the battle were Eliab the firstborn, and next unto him Abinadab, and the third Shammah.

1Samuel 17:14 And David was the youngest: and the three eldest followed Saul.

1Samuel 17:15 But David went and returned from Saul to feed his father's sheep at Bethlehem.

1Samuel 17:16 And the Philistine drew near morning and evening, and presented himself forty days.

1Samuel 17:17 And Jesse said unto David his son, Take now for thy brethren an ephah of this parched corn, and these ten loaves, and run to the camp of thy brethren;

1Samuel 17:18 And carry these ten cheeses unto the captain of their thousand, and look how thy brethren fare, and take their pledge.

1Samuel 17:19 Now Saul, and they, and all the men of Israel, were in the valley of Elah, fighting with the Philistines.

1Samuel 17:20 And David rose up early in the morning, and left the sheep with a keeper, and took, and went, as Jesse had commanded him; and he came to the trench, as the host was going forth to the fight, and shouted for the battle.

1Samuel 17:21 For Israel and the Philistines had put the battle in array, army against army.

1Samuel 17:22 And David left his carriage in the hand of the keeper of the carriage, and ran into the army, and came and saluted his brethren.

1Samuel 17:23 And as he talked with them, behold, there came up the champion, the Philistine of Gath, Goliath by name, out of the armies of the Philistines, and spake according to the same words: and David heard them.

1Samuel 17:24 And all the men of Israel, when they saw the man, fled from him, and were sore afraid.

1Samuel 17:25 And the men of Israel said, Have ye seen this man that is come up? surely to defy Israel is he come up: and it shall be, that the man who killeth him, the king will enrich him with great riches, and will give him his daughter, and make his father's house free in Israel.

1Samuel 17:26 And David spake to the men that stood by him, saying, What shall be done to the man that killeth this Philistine, and taketh away the reproach from Israel? for who is this uncircumcised Philistine, that he should defy the armies of the living God?

1Samuel 17:27 And the people answered him after this manner, saying, So shall it be done to the man that killeth him.

1Samuel 17:28 And Eliab his eldest brother heard when he spake unto the men; and Eliab's anger was kindled against David, and he said, Why camest thou down hither? and with whom hast thou left those few sheep in the wilderness? I know thy pride, and the naughtiness of thine heart; for thou art come down that thou mightest see the battle.

1Samuel 17:29 And David said, What have I now done? Is there not a cause?

1Samuel 17:30 And he turned from him toward another, and spake after the same manner: and the people answered him again after the former manner.

1Samuel 17:31 And when the words were heard which David spake, they rehearsed them before Saul: and he sent for him.

1Samuel 17:32 And David said to Saul, Let no man's heart fail because of him; thy servant will go and fight with this Philistine.

1Samuel 17:33 And Saul said to David, Thou art not able to go against this Philistine to fight with him: for thou art but a youth, and he a man of war from his youth.

1Samuel 17:34 And David said unto Saul, Thy servant kept his father's sheep, and there came a lion, and a bear, and took a lamb out of the flock:

1Samuel 17:35 And I went out after him, and smote him, and delivered it out of his mouth: and when he arose against me, I caught him by his beard, and smote him, and slew him.

1Samuel 17:36 Thy servant slew both the lion and the bear: and this uncircumcised Philistine shall be as one of them, seeing he hath defied the armies of the living God.

1Samuel 17:37 David said moreover, The LORD that delivered me out of the paw of the lion, and out of the paw of the bear, he will deliver me out of the hand of this Philistine. And Saul said unto David, Go, and the LORD be with thee.

1Samuel 17:38 And Saul armed David with his armour, and he put an helmet of brass upon his head; also he armed him with a coat of mail.

1Samuel 17:39 And David girded his sword upon his armour, and he assayed to go; for he had not proved it. And David said unto Saul, I cannot go with these; for I have not proved them. And David put them off him.

1Samuel 17:40 And he took his staff in his hand, and chose him five smooth stones out of the brook, and put them in a shepherd's bag which he had, even in a scrip; and his sling was in his hand: and he drew near to the Philistine.

1Samuel 17:41 And the Philistine came on and drew near unto David; and the man that bare the shield went before him.

1Samuel 17:42 And when the Philistine looked about, and saw David, he disdained him: for he was but a youth, and ruddy, and of a fair countenance.

1Samuel 17:43 And the Philistine said unto David, Am I a dog, that thou comest to me with staves? And the Philistine cursed David by his gods.

1Samuel 17:44 And the Philistine said to David, Come to me, and I will give thy flesh unto the fowls of the air, and to the beasts of the field.

1Samuel 17:45 Then said David to the Philistine, Thou comest to me with a sword, and with a spear, and with a shield: but I come to thee in the name of the LORD of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom thou hast defied.

1Samuel 17:46 This day will the LORD deliver thee into mine hand; and I will smite thee, and take thine head from thee; and I will give the carcases of the host of the Philistines this day unto the fowls of the air, and to the wild beasts of the earth; that all the earth may know that there is a God in Israel.

1Samuel 17:47 And all this assembly shall know that the LORD saveth not with sword and spear: for the battle is the LORD's, and he will give you into our hands.

1Samuel 17:48 And it came to pass, when the Philistine arose, and came, and drew nigh to meet David, that David hastened, and ran toward the army to meet the Philistine.

1Samuel 17:49 And David put his hand in his bag, and took thence a stone, and slang it, and smote the Philistine in his forehead, that the stone sunk into his forehead; and he fell upon his face to the earth.

1Samuel 17:50 So David prevailed over the Philistine with a sling and with a stone, and smote the Philistine, and slew him; but there was no sword in the hand of David.

1Samuel 17:51 Therefore David ran, and stood upon the Philistine, and took his sword, and drew it out of the sheath thereof, and slew him, and cut off his head therewith. And when the Philistines saw their champion was dead, they fled.

1Samuel 17:52 And the men of Israel and of Judah arose, and shouted, and pursued the Philistines, until thou come to the valley, and to the gates of Ekron. And the wounded of the Philistines fell down by the way to Shaaraim, even unto Gath, and unto Ekron.

1Samuel 17:53 And the children of Israel returned from chasing after the Philistines, and they spoiled their tents.

1Samuel 17:54 And David took the head of the Philistine, and brought it to Jerusalem; but he put his armour in his tent.

1Samuel 17:55 And when Saul saw David go forth against the Philistine, he said unto Abner, the captain of the host, Abner, whose son is this youth? And Abner said, As thy soul liveth, O king, I cannot tell.

1Samuel 17:56 And the king said, Enquire thou whose son the stripling is.

1Samuel 17:57 And as David returned from the slaughter of the Philistine, Abner took him, and brought him before Saul with the head of the Philistine in his hand.

1Samuel 17:58 And Saul said to him, Whose son art thou, thou young man? And David answered, I am the son of thy servant Jesse the Bethlehemite.

 2Samuel 11:1 And it came to pass, after the year was expired, at the time when kings go forth to battle, that David sent Joab, and his servants with him, and all Israel; and they destroyed the children of Ammon, and besieged Rabbah. But David tarried still at Jerusalem.

2Samuel 11:2 And it came to pass in an eveningtide, that David arose from off his bed, and walked upon the roof of the king's house: and from the roof he saw a woman washing herself; and the woman was very beautiful to look upon.

2Samuel 11:3 And David sent and enquired after the woman. And one said, Is not this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam, the wife of Uriah the Hittite?

2Samuel 11:4 And David sent messengers, and took her; and she came in unto him, and he lay with her; for she was purified from her uncleanness: and she returned unto her house.

2Samuel 11:5 And the woman conceived, and sent and told David, and said, I am with child.

12Samuel 11:6 And David sent to Joab, saying, Send me Uriah the Hittite. And Joab sent Uriah to David.

2Samuel 11:7 And when Uriah was come unto him, David demanded of him how Joab did, and how the people did, and how the war prospered.

2Samuel 11:8 And David said to Uriah, Go down to thy house, and wash thy feet. And Uriah departed out of the king's house, and there followed him a mess of meat from the king.

2Samuel 11:9 But Uriah slept at the door of the king's house with all the servants of his lord, and went not down to his house.

2Samuel 11:10 And when they had told David, saying, Uriah went not down unto his house, David said unto Uriah, Camest thou not from thy journey? why then didst thou not go down unto thine house?

2Samuel 11:11 And Uriah said unto David, The ark, and Israel, and Judah, abide in tents; and my lord Joab, and the servants of my lord, are encamped in the open fields; shall I then go into mine house, to eat and to drink, and to lie with my wife? as thou livest, and as thy soul liveth, I will not do this thing.

2Samuel 11:12 And David said to Uriah, Tarry here to day also, and to morrow I will let thee depart. So Uriah abode in Jerusalem that day, and the morrow.

2Samuel 11:13 And when David had called him, he did eat and drink before him; and he made him drunk: and at even he went out to lie on his bed with the servants of his lord, but went not down to his house.

2Samuel 11:14 And it came to pass in the morning, that David wrote a letter to Joab, and sent it by the hand of Uriah.

2Samuel 11:15 And he wrote in the letter, saying, Set ye Uriah in the forefront of the hottest battle, and retire ye from him, that he may be smitten, and die.

2Samuel 11:16 And it came to pass, when Joab observed the city, that he assigned Uriah unto a place where he knew that valiant men were.

2Samuel 11:17 And the men of the city went out, and fought with Joab: and there fell some of the people of the servants of David; and Uriah the Hittite died also.

2Samuel 11:18 Then Joab sent and told David all the things concerning the war;

2Samuel 11:19 And charged the messenger, saying, When thou hast made an end of telling the matters of the war unto the king,

2Samuel 11:20 And if so be that the king's wrath arise, and he say unto thee, Wherefore approached ye so nigh unto the city when ye did fight? knew ye not that they would shoot from the wall?

2Samuel 11:21 Who smote Abimelech the son of Jerubbesheth? did not a woman cast a piece of a millstone upon him from the wall, that he died in Thebez? why went ye nigh the wall? then say thou, Thy servant Uriah the Hittite is dead also.

2Samuel 11:22 So the messenger went, and came and shewed David all that Joab had sent him for.

2Samuel 11:23 And the messenger said unto David, Surely the men prevailed against us, and came out unto us into the field, and we were upon them even unto the entering of the gate.

2Samuel 11:24 And the shooters shot from off the wall upon thy servants; and some of the king's servants be dead, and thy servant Uriah the Hittite is dead also.

2Samuel 11:25 Then David said unto the messenger, Thus shalt thou say unto Joab, Let not this thing displease thee, for the sword devoureth one as well as another: make thy battle more strong against the city, and overthrow it: and encourage thou him.

2Samuel 11:26 And when the wife of Uriah heard that Uriah her husband was dead, she mourned for her husband.

2Samuel 11:27 And when the mourning was past, David sent and fetched her to his house, and she became his wife, and bare him a son. But the thing that David had done displeased the LORD.

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[pearlsartblog2019]

Monster Verse AU: Part Five

SPG  Monster Verse AU: Part Five 

Notes: Notes: Don’t own SPG… all of those lovelies belong to the bennetts and co. I just do strange things in stories with the characters for fun. 

Don’t own Sprocket  Or Dex they be long to the very awesome: https://spg-fanbot-cousins.tumblr.com/

Pearl is my own character and is used in this and several other stories. Time period note : This is the start of the part of the story which is set in modern times.. The year is about 2018-early 2019. Hope you like! Enjoy the show..

   Honestly.. The night had started out normal enough her new lil human Cousin Specter playing happily on his Pappa’s web. Somehow managing to not stick to the thing and spending time with her other Cousin Dex in his rolly polly wolf form. 

Nothing odd or sinister here at all.

But no.. she realized.. That wasn’t quite right. One of the quartet was missing. 

The batch of mischief makers that kept all the older members of the walter clan on their respective monstrous toes, Was nowhere to be found.  Indeed Sprocket realized she hadn't seen her younger sister in several days. SO either she was upset about something, or something else was wrong. 

She uncolied her long silver tail from its “arm chair” position and headed for the door. 

Both of her aunts were out in the hallway having a quiet conversation that she just barely caught the tail end of.

“No,” Aunt rabbit said, “he’s not seen her in days and Spine is worried to death.”

“So she’s hiding?” Aunt Upgrade asked, “did she and the other kids have a fight?”

Rabbit shook her head, “no the kids have been fine. Getting along great actually for a change. Spine think’s its something else.. Something worse. He’s afraid…”

“Of what?” Sprocket demanded of her two aunts, “What’s Dad afraid of and what’s it got to do with Pearl?”

The two older monster bots, A Kitsune and Succubus respectively got worried looks on their faces.

“Sprocket, honey, “ upgrade told her, “I think you might need to talk to your dad about it 

Kiddo. Something bad might be wrong with your sister. “

“What?” Sprocket demanded, “Wrong like how?” The lil naga snarled. 

“Wrong like she might be sick honey,” Her aunt continued, “Really sick you and yer dad need to find her as fast as you can."

Suddenly any good feelings were gone and the Naga girl turned and slithered away as fast as her tail could carry her. Away from the tv/ sitting room and in the direction of her little sister's room.

her baby sister Pearl was like their father. Truth is Sprocket was adopted, which is why a high level Vampire like the Spine had a naga child. But no differences had ever been made between the two lil girls. Pearl having been born after the dashing Vampire Lord saved the lil silver naga from the streets. 

Spine had gone away to help deal with a pack of monster hunters in the orient that were harassing some of his people. When the silver vampire lord had returned from the trip a year later.. it had been with his second daughter in his arms, and a heart broken by her mother having died. 

Now in their long lives the  younger daughter was starting to come of age and things were changing.. a lot.

Changes that The Spine had knew were coming but had not spoken to his older daughter about, because he hoped his own nature in Pearl would be enough to keep them from happening.  He honestly should have known, his lover's will and nature were as strong as his own. She changed them only for his love when she realized some of her ideas were wrong. Still, what she was couldn't be denied and now it was surfacing in Pearl, worrying Spine sick.

That is the shape his older daughter found him in as he hurried down the hall to get to Pearl's room.

"dad!!" sprocket called, "what's wrong!?"

Spine made a face, "your aunts have incredibly large mouths... you know that? I told them NOT to tell you."

The lil silver naga shrugged, "Nah they are evil geniuses .. they knew you'd need my help.. So what the hell is going on with pearl? Shes not been out of her room in three days."

Spine sighed, "I'll tell you everything but we need to get there as fast as possible. Maybe what i think happened has not. Maybe she's just in a bad mood. Let's make sure before we fly off the handle."

The pair of them got to the door of Pearl's room and knocked. Nothing for a full minute and a half. Usually the lil thing was prompt in her politeness and came right to the door. Tonight tho, and for several nights hence there had been nothing.

"Lets see if its locked," Sprocket told her father.

She tried the handle and the door swung inward on its hinges with no trouble whatsoever. The inside of the room was cold and dark and of her lil sis there was no sign.

"Is she even here?" Sprocket looked around, "Pearl doesn't hunt she usually gets hers from what you bring home for her right?"

Spine nodded and continued to look around.

"yes," he told her, "It was easier on her. She was a bit too young yet to learn how to hunt. Doing so without killing the human requires some skill and I didn't want her to have to deal with that. "

"Yah no i gots," Sprocket nodded and slid deeper into the room, "She's too sweet for that any how."

She peeped into the bed and found nothing. Stuck her head into the closet and again nothing.

"ok well if she's not hunting, and she's not out in the manor " She looked around, "Where is she?"

"I don't know," Spine told her worriedly, "Let me look at something."

He headed over to pearl's desk and found what he was looking for, a dorm size refrigerator. He cracked the door open and looked inside. Small containers of blood lined the inside of the cooling unit, it was almost full.

THAT made him stop. It was friday night. He always brought her blood back with him from his saturday night hunting expeditions. The cooling unit should have been almost empty by this point in the week. But he could see that it was still almost full.

"Oh no," He could feel the horror slide over his sliver face, "oh please no...."

"Dad..." Sprocket started.

She slightly backed away from Spine because she had never seen her father behave in such a manner. He looked utterly horrified, at himself. 

That was a look she never thought she'd see on her father's face. He had long ago reconciled his vampire lord status, vowing that even if he needed blood to live he'd never willingly kill someone to get it. Vowed to always be compassionate and gentle with the lil human females that Gave the Silver Lord what he and his precious daughter needed to live. 

now tho.. he looked completely disgusted with himself. 

Sprocket backed up more and her coils touched something that felt like solid ice. 

She twisted around to get a good look at what she had bumped into and screamed bloody murder. The cold thing she had touched was the limp, lifeless body of her lil sister.

"PEARL!!" the naga shrieked and dove for her lil sister, wrapping her warm tail around the ice like lil vampire. "Pearl! Pearl please wake up! Pearl!"

The other girl remained unconscious, not responding to her sister's tearful cries or shaking sobs.  all she could do was hold her sister tightly and rubbing the icy lil hand trying to get her to wake up.

"Dad!" Sprocket looked up, "Dad whats wrong with her! Why is she like this! Did someone come in here and hurt her!? What happened?"

The look on Spine's face told his older daughter that his heart was breaking for both her and her  younger sibling. Now the truth would come out and there wasn't one damned thing he could do to protect the two of them from it any more.

"I was afraid of this," He replied softly, " Here..." 

He removed two of the containers from the cooling unit and went over to his children.

"Can you hold her up for me Sprocket," He asked softly, "She needs blood, I have to see if I can get her to swallow this. I hope she's so out of it right now she won't realize what is going on."

"What? " The naga girl looked at her father as tho he had suddenly sprouted a second head but did as he asked and changed the way she was holding her sister. Propping her head up on her shoulder. 

Spine infinitely gentle as he sat down next to his little girls and opened one of the tops of the containers. 

"Come on lil one, " He told Pearl Softly, "You need to swallow this, even if you don't like it any more."

He held it up for her and she was out of it enough to operate on instinct and drink it. 

Sprocket held her sister until her father had gotten her to swallow both of the containers and then let the younger girl go from her coils as Spine carried his  younger daughter to her bed.

"What do you mean "She doesn't like it any more."? " Sprocket demanded, "She's a vampire. ... "

Spine sat pearl down on her pillows and pulled the blanket around her, "No sprocket.. She's not. "

"Say again, " The naga's eyes were now the size of silver dollars.

Spine sighed, "Pearl is a dhampir... A half breed. Her mother.....Was as human vampire hunter. "

spine got that look of utter self loathing on his face again and smoothed the hair off his younger daughters face, "And her mother's blood ... is finally starting to come out. "