Tumgik
#or if i should make it a TRIPLE role swap au and have her be trained by jedi master shmi skywalker
voidartisan · 1 year
Text
Idea that’s been living in my head for a very long time: Double role swap AU where Anakin is a senator and Obi-Wan is the leader of his home planet and Padme and Satine are Jedi
58 notes · View notes
i can't believe i almost forgot to make this post oh my god okay
so!! last night while in call with @leezardweezard i came up with a twilight au for the joaks and i cannot stop thinking about it so i need to share it or we will both explode
the points will be under a readmore cuz it'd be kinda long if not
au where edward and bella have switched places
-they're still the same people personality wise but edward is charlie's son and bella is now a cullen, they have literally just swapped places and roles
-bella was still meant to be with rosalie but did not want to be with her
-she totally helps her kill those men though
-she's hooked up with alice (jasper does not exist)
-since the literal only thing stopping her from jumping edward's bones from the start was the fact that he would not touch her like that until marriage, she would not hold back in the decades before meeting him esp being w/ alice
-edward is now the awkward pale lil meow meow that came from arizona to live with his dad in forks
-jacob and edward were childhood friends and they have a thing for each other
-when bella hits the scene jacob is jealous at first tries to posture and stick up for edward's honor or smth and bella is just like "we can share tho like what if we shared i'd be cool w/ that"
-poly bi queen tbh
-jacob is not a huge fan at First but warms up to it slowly (during the tent scene is when he fully accepts it)
-edward doesn't wanna be a vampire which throws a bit of a cog into the works but then
-because of the james fight, the cullens decide that they should leave for edward's safety ripping the happy couple apart
-edward starts doing stupid shit to die cuz he's like "i can't be without her" even though he still has jacob
-alice thinks he dies
-bella starts doing her own stupid shit subtly trying to get caught as a vamp so the volturi have a reason to kill her but she is also trying to stall a bit to see if he's truly dead bc she's hoping it was a bug in alice's vision
-the volturi catch wind and similar scene where eddy boy gets there as she's on trial
-they are intrigued and put pressure on her to turn him or they will wipe them All out
-eddy boy has already changed his mind anyways bc being apart from her had him like "damn i don't wanna live without you so if i have to be a vampire to be with you i guess i'll do it"
-they still get married right out of highschool for both love and volturi pressure
-it's a triple wedding, legally on paper it's just eddy and bells but jacob is also part of the ceremony and alice and her are already married so she's just there
-jacob and bella standing on opposite sides while charlie walks edward down to give him away cuz it's funny
-the pack gives jacob away
-the cullens give bella away
-it's very croweded lmao
-they fyuck after marriage cuz eddy boy would still not want to until then and jacob and bella both respect him enough to wait
-imprinting is a SHIT mechanic but FOR the sake of the universe it is what allows him to live immortally SO for that reason and THAT ALONE
-we're still bending the rules a bit
-he imprints on BOTH of them the first time they have sex together
-like jasper, there is no renesme she does not exist
-HOWEVER if she was to exist it's because bella was turned when she was on her period so, like with how edward's sperm was frozen bc the man never rubbed one out in his decades of death and thus it was preserved, so was a single (1) egg. but again i am looking away she does not exist i have only considered this because i think that's REALLY funny mechanically
-jacob still has that scene to show charlie his wolf form bc i think it's a really funny scene
30 notes · View notes
Text
going into more detail about the P2/P4/P5 Persona Q idea, I’m thinking of breaking the cast into the following chunks:
P2 IS: Tatsuya, Lisa, Eikichi and Jun (separated from Maya in Xibalba)
P2 EP: Maya, Ulala, Baofu and Katsuya (before Tatsuya officially joins the party but after the P1 party member leaves?)
P4: entire IT (cultural festival like in PQ, or after fighting the culprit)
P5: all PTs (before Casino heist like PQ2)
Having the P2 cast all come from the EP timeline with Lisa, Eikichi and Jun getting accidentally involved & regaining their IS memories works too, but the storyline would have to revolve around that + Tatsuya’s reaction to justify introducing that plot element imo, cause it’s A LOT to deal with. Also if the overarching plot is centered on P2 (particularly the IS party members), then why are the P4 and P5 casts involved? Also while I think it’d be interesting to re-introduce Philemon and Nyarlathotep to the Persona setting and have them play a bigger part—especially since Nyarly isn’t banished until the end of EP—their involvement might skew the plot too heavily towards P2? (although I admit the “nobody remembers this adventure” ending of PQ games would work especially well for Lisa, Jun and Eikichi here) 
tbh PQ had quite a lot of nods to P2 IS (the clock tower, school mysteries + moving statue urban legend on P4-side, and the true form of the main antagonist). I kinda like the idea of the setting being a fake school like PQ, with details of the school influenced by the persona users when they arrive, but the story might have to be tweaked a bit (different final boss probably, and maybe bring in more themes in P2/4/5). 
potential themes
I liked that PQ and PQ2 had plots that were ultimately about the new characters, since it justifies their inclusion (and i think it’s a bit unfair if the game focuses too much on the cast of a particular game). I have mixed feelings about some of the execution of PQ and PQ2, but I do appreciate the intent behind it. I do think reinforcement of the games’ themes could help make the overarching story more cohesive, so here are some potential themes with P2, P4 and P5 in mind:
rumors, gossip and the role of mass media are important in all 3 (4) persona games here: P2 antagonists manipulate various media to generate rumors, and in turn manipulate rumors to bring about the end of the world; the Midnight Channel in P4 reacts to local gossip and it’s about the casual dehumanization of individuals through media (mostly TV); in P5 people’s perception of the PT is literally a plot point, and the game reminds you of the PT approval rating almost constantly
(distorted) memories is primarily a P2 thing (”worse than death\ forgotten”, Nyarlathotep’s manipulation of Jun and Philemon’s deal to the IS kids, Tatsuya’s ‘sin’) but it could work with the mystery aspect of PQ games. Distorted memories arguably lead to distorted self-perception (P5), and uncovering the truth is P4′s jam
as mentioned in the previous post, the tension between P5′s teenage rebellion and P2 EP’s adult guidance could be really fun to explore and incorporate into the plot. Persona games are about coming of age, but with EP there’s also a secondary theme of guiding the younger generation and fully grappling with adulthood—the heroines of PQ and PQ2 are quite young, but I can potentially see the new character(s) being a little older here (maybe 17-18?)
stroll ideas
Of course the reason why this idea exists in the first place is all the potential interactions between everyone! There’s just so much potential with all the different dynamics and topics they can discuss :3 Here are a few ideas:
Stomping Grounds: P2/4/5 discuss where and how they bust Shadows. P2 “we had to sleep in dungeons sometimes!!!” is incredibly envious that demons aren’t running around the real world for the others. P2 and P4 are jealous of P5 for not having to repair/replace ruined clothes (”you just think about cool clothes and they appear on you?!” “man we should try that in Xibalba...” “it’s really not that simple! Morgana can explain it better, but basically it’s our mental image of rebellion” etc etc).
Lisa’s Brutal Makeover Corner: Teddie gets jealous when Lisa demonstrates her makeup skills on Jun and wants to get dolled up too—he won the Yasogami cross-dressing pageant after all! He has to be the prettiest!!! 
Butterfly Effect: several P4 and P2 characters try to use P5 cast’s knowledge to their advantage, but is stopped by the detective trio to prevent potential time paradoxes
Say It With Flowers: Jun and Haru (and Yukiko?) discuss flower language, share gardening tips, and swap demon/shadow intimidation tactics. Everyone around them is slightly afraid of their enthusiasm on the topic...
Fashion Gurus: Eikichi and Yusuke have a discussion about ~aesthetics~ and comment on their companions’ styles. Kanji is roped into the argument
Fashion Gurus Strike Again: Ulala, Ann and Rise discuss latest fashion trends and comment on the others’ fashion choices
The Audiophiles’ Alliance: Futaba and Yosuke chat about headphones and the greatest bops (with Futaba lamenting she can’t make him eat his words because the song she’s thinking of doesn’t exist yet in his time). Eikichi—aka the great Michel-sama—senses a prime opportunity to get some new fans... 
Strangers in a Familiar Land: Lisa and Ann get into how people tend to act... weird about them due to their foreign looks; Teddie, on the other hand, loves the attention his human form gets from the people around town (and the girls conclude that Teddie would probably get into trouble in a big city)
Everybody Loves Kung Fu Fightin’: Makoto, Ulala, Lisa and Chie show off their moves and swap training tips. Lisa and Chie talk about their favorite martial arts movies and convinces the others to check them out
Big Bro’s Worries: Katsuya and Yosuke complain about their younger brothers, while P4 and P5 protags are slightly smug that they don’t get that much trouble from their sisters, especially P4 protag 
Velvet Room attendants
Since P2/4/5 all have multiple Velvet Room attendants, they’re gonna double up on some jobs to avoid over-crowding:
P2: Demon Artist: he’s in charge of the Workshop. Unlike the other attendants he’s human, so Margaret and the twins are probably intrigued/unsettled by him and Marie might also be curious as someone else who also stays at the Velvet Room but isn’t really an attendant
P2: Nameless & Belladonna: they handle the healing service. They can sense something unusual with the P2 cast due to the split timelines, but it has no bearing on the plot. I’m on the fence whether to include a healing service at all, but if there is one I think it suits them, since their music is supposed to put guests at ease
P4: Margaret & Marie: like their PQ and PQ2 roles, Margaret manages the Persona Compendium and Fusions, and Marie handles skill cards
P5: Caroline and Justine: the twins handle the quests, since Margaret does the fusions. Caroline enjoys ordering the persona users about
[you can find more on this AU tagged under PQ Triple]
29 notes · View notes
barbecuedphoenix · 7 years
Note
I would like to see a AU with the Eldarya guys/people in a coffe shop
Let’s be honest: it’s goingto be the single least efficient coffee shop in the city. But people will keepcoming for the eye candy… >u>
Warning:Longest head-canon, ever. 14 characters,each with their own little stories.
Nevra, the Head Waiter
Naturally, this snake oilmerchant with fangs ladies’ man is going to be where the action is: on themain floor, catering to all the customers personally. (Because no one cantrust him in handling kitchen or bar-top equipment.) He’s got the drive,the guile, the inbred hospitality, and the metaphorical eyes on the back of hishead to pull off even a morning or evening rush single-handed. And later bragabout the triple-figure tips, phone numbers, and juicy gossip he collected that day to his coworkers in the back-room, even when his voice is hoarse and his feethave lost all feeling. Nevra actually keeps track of his ‘scores’ in hispersonal agenda-book, always ready to outdo himself every month. (Because let’sface it… there is no competition for him from the rest of the servers.)  
Though quite a few of hiscoworkers feel like putting fresh garlic in his next espresso (for himself orfor his ‘beloved customers’), they can’t do it for a few reasons: 1.) Thecustomers and tips that Nevra brings in make up half the café’s total income.The place will sink without his pretty, monocular face on the floor. 2.) He’sactually generous with his coworkers. Newbies on the staff know they can relyon him (until they’re used as customer bait during evening rushes for‘experience’). And he never keeps any of his tips for himself, always making apoint of strutting to the collective tip jar to put in what looks like theprice for a new smartphone. So whether they like him or not, the gigolo has to stay.    
Nevra is quite proud of hisjob, and hopes to eventually see the café become the city’s next ‘must-seedestination’ (or, more likely, buy and renovate the place as part of hisnetwork of high-end dining spots). So he doesn’t tolerate unprofessional shenaniganson his floor (beyond swapping phonenumbers, which is sanctified activity as far as he’s concerned). What’sguaranteed to tick him off: if a customer is boorish to one of his babiesjunior serving staff, if one of his coworkers half-asses an order, or if hecatches anyone stealing from that tip jar he’s filling. In either case, thecriminal party can expect to find themselves sheepishly shuffling to the doorunder the force of Nevra’s gimlet smile.
Ezarel, the Baristo and Assistant Baker
Who would have thought thatthe biochemist graduate student / coddled trust-fund baby would have to dirtyhis hands by working part-time in a common city café? But that’s exactly whathappened after a late night prank against another obnoxious student in theuniversity lab went a little too far. Switching reagent labels can yield somenasty results. Long story short: the lab was quarantined for weeks, Ezarel’sparents received a damages bill that looked like the price for one fullsemester, and Ezarel was given an ultimatum via Skype conference: pay off thatbill himself and grow up, or get pulled out of the university.  
It took weeks of inglorious job-hunting in the city—because thatprank got him blacklisted by university staff and technicians, so he couldn’teven work on campus—before Ezarel scored a job making pastries andridiculously-creamy lattes at the café. Thanks to that waiter Nevra wholistened to his story, laughed his ass off, and then hooked him up for aninterview with the café’s owner Miiko. His only qualifications: over six yearsof advanced biochemistry with a stellar GPA (campus shenanigansnotwithstanding), and an aristocratic palate when it comes to sweets. He knows when a crème brulee isn’t up toscratch, damn it.
So now wise-guy Ezarel worksfour to five hours a day at the café, slowly paying off his debt in-between jugglingclasses. He’s either at the counter, trolling customers about type-2 diabeteswhile serving up their perfect triple-sugar-dark-chocolate macchiatos, or in thekitchen: up to his elbows in flour, sugar frosting his hair and eyebrows, and tickingoff the head baker Karuto whenever he points out that the latter is skirtingcity health regulations. Or that the lemon-ginger-coconut coffee cake needs a lot less coconut cream and more‘natural’ ingredients that won’t bloat waistlines.
Still, despite hisinsistence that he’s only staying until he pay off that lab bill, Ezarel atheart is aware that he rather likes this job. He knows he’s the best in handling the ornery steamers and coffeegrinders. And there’s something satisfying with this kind of applied chemistry(that results in him taking home a thermos of spiced honey-chai tea latte andhalf-a-dozen day-old pastries each time). Plus, pissing-off Karuto only getsbetter when it’s his turn to write both the ‘joke of the day’ and ‘daily specials’on the café’s menu board. Valkyon is always forced to correct the weirdthings that Ezarel writes there—like ‘Ye Olde Goat’s Beard Sandwiches’– tosave his skin.
Valkyon, the Cashier and Security Guard
Normally, it’s considered a questionable marketing decision toplace a silent, burly, six-foot-three man at the register, where customersshould be encouraged to indulge themselves with their next order. But afterNevra caught their last cashier stealing from the register and thetip jar, Miiko opted for foolproof honesty instead of charisma.
Valkyon is only slightly-less wooden than the counter he’smanaging, but every day, the café’s revenue stays strictly on par with theinvoices. Café lines also seem to move faster: it seems that his silent staremakes customers universally uncomfortable, so they never dare to spend morethan four seconds on deciding their order. And just because this man doesn’tmake small-talk doesn’t mean he can’t memorize half-a-dozen complex coffeeorders on hearing them once, or whip out exact change for a massive bill infive seconds without reaching for the calculator. Best of all, Valkyon has anuncanny way of discouraging customers from protesting at the rise in menuprices, with just a scowl and ten words: “We’re compensating for changes in thesupply chain. It’s procedure.”
No one really knows where he came from or why a guy like him isworking at the café’s register, but if they’re smart, they’ll refrain fromasking. And instead sneak a look over the counter at the metal baseball bat hekeeps hidden below the register at all times. Because Valkyon’s real job iskeeping the café a family-friendly place when it’s smack in the middle of arough inner-city district. He pulls the longest hours out of everyone in thecafé because he’s also the bouncer and nighttime security guard. Mostopportunistic youths on the streets now give the café a wide berth after dark,even when there’s only Valkyon inside by the register, quietly tallying theday’s profits with the invoices. That’s because the last ill-timed break-in hadalready become a district legend: ending with two tables and six chairs broken,the steamer on the other side of the floor from the counter, and one sobbingyoung man who locked himself in the customer bathroom while Valkyon, without ascratch, still holding the locked register protectively under one arm, finallyphoned the police.      
Coworkers say that for someone who performs such a vital role inthe café, Valkyon never asks for much. Beyond a free mug of strong barley teafor himself and a bag of leftover cheese, seeds, and nuts for his pet mouseafter every shift. As well as the right to keep a live video-feed on said mouseplaying on his phone next to the register at all times, so he’ll be the firstto know if the little nugget ever takes sick while he’s away at work. EvenEzarel has given up on teasing him about it.  
Miiko, the Café Owner
It will take a person withthe patience of a saint and the savvy of a media mogul to save this screwy caféon the wrong side of town. And the job fell like a bowling ball into Miiko’s lap when her mentor suddenlycroaked and left her the once-award-winning café in his will. She wastechnically jobless at the time, so accepting ownership of the café seemed likethe most sensible thing to do. Never mind that she knew zilch about foodservice at the time and has a fuse short enough to send bomb techniciansscattering in fear: she could learn on the job, right?
Every day since the attorneyread out her extended-death-sentence from the will, Miiko has been fighting thefeeling that she’s paying for the biggestmistake of her life. Especially with a near-total staff turnover everyeight weeks, a stubborn average of three stars (approximately) on Yelp!,spreadsheets that break-even at best, and an ongoing list of complaints on bizarrethings that keep happening in the café that boggle even her mind. (It alsodoesn’t help that she ends up yelling at half their sponsors and cateringpartners in her office within forty-five seconds on average, but hey, that’swhy she keeps Leiftan around to scout for new options. Their café may not havemany friends, but they have their pride, damn it!)          
Still. Miiko can’t forceherself to get rid of the core staff of the café. Even when half of them areuntested but loyal desperados scraped in from the streets, and the other halfhave major personality problems. She of all people knows what it’s like to bethrown a lifeline at the last moment. So every time she sweeps into the caféfor an inspection and her complementary matcha tea, she deliberately curbs her tongueat seeing Chrome scrub off Ashkore’s latest round of graffiti on the frontwindow, or when Alajea drops a tray of hot Americanos onto an old man’s lap, orwhen Nevra chats up the gaggle of college girls in the corner and leaves white-facedYkhar on the floor to field other customers, or when Karuto gets an apoplexyagain on finding Ezarel’s newest ‘correction’ to the café’s menu board. They’llall learn as she will, in time. As the captain of this ship, she just has totry to be optimistic.
Leiftan, the CaféRepresentative    
He’s perhaps Miiko’ssaving grace in the chaotic café: the reliable second-in-command who dropped insuddenly and mysteriously like a blessing from the clouds when she was stillpulling the establishment out of the grave. A suave man with the literalpatience of an angel and that disarmingly-gentle smile, it didn’t take long forLeiftan to be given the job that Miiko loathed: currying favor with otherdining spots, reviewers, patrons, and sponsors across the city. Talking topeople and building networks is his specialty, really; he couldn’t object tothe job in good conscience.  
But because Miiko andthe staff go through their contacts like a teenaged girl goes through facialtreatments, Leiftan is constantly onthe road looking for more flexible critics, better suppliers, more generoussponsors, kinder allies, and worthwhile employees (to name a few). For some,he’ll counsel them carefully behind Miiko’s back before bringing them tothe café: warning them on what to expect, how to drop her guard, and especiallywhat not to say to stay in her office for at least a few minutes. (Forty-fiveseconds is the average, the last time he checked; those are steep odds, so theyhad better heed his words well.)
Still, for all hisnegotiator’s savvy, the café is somehow stuck at three stars and repelling thebig names in the city’s dining and entertainment industry like a geriatric at ared-carpet event. The catering business is a tough one, he likes to remindMiiko (and others) whenever he returns from another apparently-unsuccessfulmeeting with a prospective supplier or client. Patience is a virtue.
In his rare off-time,the last thing that Leiftan wants is to spend too much time in the café; ascharming as the little place is, it has become synonymous with work in hismind. So at most, he stops by for a caramel macchiato and croissant to-go, andto give a kind word to whatever new face he sees behind the counter. Because heknows (through grueling experience) that there’s a 90% chance they’ll resign intwo weeks.  
Kero, the Accountant
He became Miiko’slong-suffering accountant when he showed up at her café one day, nervouslyclutching her ad in the newspaper, and stammered his way through the interviewand why he wasn’t working for major corporations anymore. He was stillstammering for a chance to prove his skill with numbers when Miiko told himthat she’d see him tomorrow morning on the second-floor office. And then heburst into tears, forcing her to brew him a cup of Earl Grey tea to calm himdown. But that part of the story is kept strictly between him and his new boss.
Since then, Kero has servedMiiko with ferocious loyalty on their shared office floor above the café, pullingin generous overtime without being asked, and never so much as asking for araise after all the scrupulous spreadsheets and tax-forms he prepares. His onlygrief is that she doesn’t seem very… patient when listening to his financialadvice. Those meetings always seemed to end with a shot-gun blast of “Are yousaying we can’t work this out?”, forcing Kero to apologize for questioning herdedication and promise to look for more options on his end. And then retiringto his desk, to blink down at his papers and wonder how the hell that happened again. He swore he woulddo better for himself here…      
Jamon, the Supplier
An independentWHO-certified, fair-trade organic and vegetarian grocer who was one of Miiko’searliest suppliers, and to date, the one who has lasted the longest. It’smostly because of a strange loyalty he feels to the café’s offbeat cast ofcharacters, who’re always happy to brew a ginseng-fortified kale smoothie justfor him from their salad greens (though he’s also aware none of them couldstomach the same vegetables he could). And frankly, they really look like they can use some help.
So even though he’s notmaking much of a profit by supporting them, Jamon continues to make regularwhole-sale deliveries to Miiko’s café at a sizable discount. Carting enormouscrates from his 100% fossil-fuel free pedal-and-solar-powered car to theirkitchen, either solo or with Cameria for major loads. And always shrugging offthe baristo, baristas, and main baker with a blasé air when they complain atthe ‘rabbit food’ he gives them to work with. Jamon will just grunt his usualline for disgruntled shoppers: it’s healthy for them and the environment. Noreturns.          
Karuto, the Head Baker  
A cantankerous war veteranand baker said to have been kicked out from a hotel kitchen after getting intoa fist-fight with the manager (though some versions of the tale involved arolling pin, or a bag of flour and a lit cigarette). Regardless, he wound up atMiiko’s modest café looking for a fresh start and what he hoped would be arespite for his piano-wire nerves and high-altitude cholesterol in his middleyears. The reality has turned out to be anything but, considering the clownsthat he now works with.
The worst of the lot is thatobnoxious rich-college-boy who works part-time in his kitchen, and is alwaysready to criticize his creations and his method with that ridiculous grin.The only things that keep Karuto from repeating that stunt with his ex-hotelmanager are a.) reminding himself that he can beat that skinny kid like baguettedough without breaking a sweat, b.) Ezarel’s body is probably insured to a six-figuresum, and c.) taking a pack of cigarettes and a daily mug of Irish coffee  in the back alley, with a quadruple-shot ofespresso mixed into the hard liquor. It’s still a hard-knock life.          
Ykhar, the Barista and Junior Waitress
A perky but anxious youngjournalism student who found herself at a loss at how the logical tradition of interningat newspapers was doing nothing for her student debts. She came to Miiko’s caféat first looking for a quiet place to sit and mope with a mug ofchamomile-and-honey tea, maybe with almond milk if they had any. Ykhar wasvery surprised, and more than a little in awe, when the elegant, fierybarista—Miiko herself working at the counter at the time—walked up with herorder and asked what was bothering her. A trial job was offered that samenight.
Since then Ykhar has thrownherself into her new job as barista and waitress with the same zeal andbreathless eye-to-detail that set her apart in all the newspapers shevolunteered at. (And limited her to no more than five-hour shifts a day unlessparamedics are on call. Her feet in their Birkenstocks always ache by thesecond hour. And customers have learnt to take pity on her every time shescrews up an order and starts looking green in the face.) Because the hecticjuggling of orders, customers, and workplace health regulations in a café isonly good practice for the hectic world of media, right?
She’s also powered by thatcollege girl’s desire to impress the alphas in her circle—namely glamorous Miikoand worldly, charismatic Leiftan. So as part of her daily ‘mirror pep-talk’ inthe employee bathroom, Ykhar talks to herself like she is Miiko: the fiery vixen and mistress of the bar who won’t takeshit from anyone! And when thatconfidence collapses at the first customer who comes up to her with an “ActuallyI didn’t order this…”, she goes back to the bathroom for five minutes andimagines it’s Leiftan giving her a second pep-talk: that she’s still a champeven with one or two mistakes on her record, as long as she learns to forgive,pick herself up, learn to do better, and getto that next customer surely waiting outside…!  
Alajea, the Other Barista and Junior Waitress
Balancing out high-strungYkhar is the airy-fairy musician Alajea, who works part-time at the café whenshe isn’t out trying to score a record deal with her voice. So far, she’s gladthat none of the producers and coaches she meets know that she’s the singlebiggest source of daily expenses in her day-job, from the number of orders shefumbles, and the dishes, mugs, cakes, and coffees that don’t exactly end up ontabletops where they’re supposed to be. (If she’s lucky that day, they won’tend up on the customer either.) Or that she’s the biggest drain on the café’s supplyof apricot syrup and lemon zest, for all the bubbly iced teas she likes tobrew for herself on the side.
No one’s sure why Miikohasn’t fired her yet. But it might be because no one else takes care of thetoddlers, the loners, and the pet dogs and cats that sometimes find their wayinto the café. Alajea may forget to bring the half-dozen coffees-to-go to thatbusinessman by the door chewing his nails and glancing spasmodically at hiswristwatch. But she never forgets to bring frosted strawberry macaroons to thatfour-year-old getting ignored by her mother as she rails about her husband toher girlfriend, or free coffee to the long-faced old man in the corner with hisarmload of newspapers, or to sneak a bowl of milk and old chicken sandwiches tothat fat dog lolling under the corner table. Fortunately, Nevra taught her thatfeeding chocolate or coffee to dogs isn’t the best idea, after the first dayshe tried it.  
Karenn, the Advertiser
When Nevra’s little sistertried to squeeze a job out of him ‘as a family favor’, he relented only after stipulatingthat she will not apply for the baristaposition. Karenn is capable of many things, and the last thing he wants isto catch her sneaking shots of the liquor they save for Karuto’s Irish coffees.Or spiking customer coffees to encourage extra tips.
So after Miiko and Leiftanlearnt about her impressive social network pages, she was hired as the café’sgeneral PR manager, online and on the ground. Leave it to a teen girl toknow the internet watering holes. Most days, people can find Karenn at acorner table of the café with a rich mocha, laced with peppermint syrup forthat extra kick… busy spam-posting café updates and photos on four differentsocial networking sites on four different devices. And somehow stilleavesdropping on everyone in the room. Other days, she runs around the cityputting up café fliers, distributing coffee samples, and handing out discountcoupons to the strangest people in the strangest places. Because let’s behonest: their café can’t compete with major coffee-and-tea chains, so they shouldappeal to niche groups, right?  
Every time she successfully puts up a flier on a window of a high-rise apartment,crashes a college party with café gifts, gives away coffee to a wild-eyedhomeless man, or distributes coupons to a biker gang, Karenn takes a selfieduring her latest achievement and sends it to her friends and Nevra. Heface-palms every single time, right in front of the customers.  
Chrome, the Delivery Boy
A street scamp that Karenn foundoutside a bank one afternoon, chaining his bike to a lamp-post and holding asign that said he’ll “shine shoes, clip dog nails, fetch newspapers, andanything else for spare change”. She and Nevra soon convinced him to work for alittle more by delivering customer orders for the café to neighboring offices,shops, and clinics. A spry kid with his own bike, who knew the city streetslike the back of his hand, could be an asset.  
There was one thing thatdidn’t factor into their plan: the boy has no concept of time. Half the time,they’ll receive phone-calls from customers on how their coffees were lateenough to become lukewarm. The other half of the time, Chrome will be lateenough in returning that the next delivery order is getting lukewarm on thecafé counter. (And the boy will take still more time in re-entering thebuilding, because Nevra is already leaning on the counter, frowning likethunder and drumming his fingers on the tabletop.) The end result: Chrome’sphone number is placed on speed-dial for Nevra and Miiko, just so they can callhim up immediately and ask “Where thehell is he?!”  
Still, there is another option that might save Chrome’s career in foodservice: Ykhar has noticed he’s a dab hand with the coffee machines, whippingup an excellent mocha Frappuccino, festooned with dark chocolate chips, forhimself (or Karenn…) every time it’s a slow day at the café. In a pinch, he canbe the next baristo, even though he’s a bit mouthy, and can’t stomach any caffeinewithout bouncing off the walls. Just to be on the safe side, they’re delaying arecommendation until after Ezarel leaves a vacancy. The older baristo likes toleave dog treats on a plate with Chrome’s name on it.  
Ewelein, the On-Call Doctor    
She’s a regular customer whoworks as a physician in the public hospital a few blocks away, and took aliking to the little café because it a.) is less crowded than the hospitalcafé, b.) serves decent sugar-free, non-fat cinnamon cappuccinos for a good price,and d.) has a comfortable chair by the ferns that just agrees with her. Granted,there’s that obnoxious head waiter who likes to hit on her on principle, and awaitress who drops or misplaces every other tray handed to her, but Ewelein haslearned to tactically ward them off with a raised book and a dry expressionwhenever they approach her table.  
But to her consternation, thequiet breaks she’s supposed to spend in the café– catching up on a book andworking on her botanical scrapbook collection—became consultation visits afterthe day she gave a Heimlich to another customer choking on a bagel. So fromthen on, she became their resident Florence Nightingale, beset by otherregulars with questions about blood pressure, diabetes, whether coffee is reallya calcium-drain for menopausal women, what side-effects are there for childrenwho consume high amounts of caffeine daily, etc. In the end, just so she could start on her coffee while it’s hot, Ewelein was forcedto draw up a free poster—certified by her hospital—for the café, detailing the top 10 caffeinemyths, and the top 10 little-known truths caffeine-addicts better know.    
Despite the hassle, Ewelein still visits the café regularly for herlunch breaks. With that customer-saving Heimlich and then the free publichealth information poster, the café’s willing to offer her free cappuccinos,free meals, and major discounts for other coffees she picks up for hercolleagues, just to keep her nearby in case things really go wrong. Well, a free lunch is a free lunch.
Ashkore, the Vandal  
A mysterious rogue from theinner city who wears a black dragon-print ski mask and loves to make lifemiserable for the denizens of Miiko’s café. His first declaration of war: helobbed a signed brick into the front window, shattering the glass and openingthe café to the other nighttime lunatics on the street. 
Since then, someof his favorite tricks include graffiti on the café’s front, givingunflattering anonymous tip-offs to health inspectors, posting inflammatory fliers onthe windshields of customer and employee cars, slashing the tires of employeecars as well, stalking new hires until they quit within weeks, and pickinglocks to steal supplies straight from the back room, if he doesn’t take a crackat the register or the safe in Miiko’s office. Every time he breaks in, the manwho signs himself off as Ashkore likes to brew a cup of Turkish black coffeefor himself using their equipment and ingredients, drink it down, and leave thedrained cup on the counter as his calling card. With no payment, of course.
Speculation on who the bastard is has ranged from amercenary lout paid by a dogged rival café, to one of the café’s manydisgruntled ex-employees, to someone with a personal grudge against eitherMiiko, Leiftan, or one of the other regular staff-members of the café. Eitherway, Ashkore is canny enough to have evaded all police sicced on his trail, andValkyon with his baseball bat.
Miiko has since enacted a ‘We shall not be intimidated by terrorists!’policy: the café will remain standing, and all employees must virtuously ignorethe ‘little jackass’ tormenting them, while she, Leiftan, and Valkyon installsecurity cameras and bully the police into making routine sweeps along theirstreet. So far, none of it seems to discourage Ashkore. Now, he just cheerfullyflips off the cameras when breaking in.  
This went waaaay further than I expected (asusual…). But AUs are just so much fun. :) And cafes are home to a lot of stories.
I also couldn’t resist adding each character’s preferred drink in eachentry. They need their caffeine (or ginseng shots) too.  
Enjoy this quirky piece atthe next coffee shop you visit. :) And don’t forget to leave feedback (forhere, and/or that place you sip your lattes at). 
86 notes · View notes