#otherwise i kinda base the shiny off of my favorite colors

[shinypokemonshowdown]

This the anon who disliked My Hero Academia. I mostly made the anti-propaganda because from what I have seen of Izuku Midoriya the Tangla shiny vines are a way brighter color. That’s why I changed the wording “looks a lot like” to “kinda looks like” also while on the topic of polls; how quickly do you usually decide what shines you like? Because I haven’t played the games yet and these polls are usually my first time seeing most shines and I pick almost immediately because if I think it’s a decent shiny. For example of one that didn’t and the other option did: Tangla doesn’t but Murkrow does. Tanga’s vines when green just look like a cartoonish vines but not leaves or anything and I don’t like that shade of green. And I immediately liked the shade if purple of shiny Murkrow.

Hmm, general my favorite shinies come from my favorite pokemon! I have a lot of love for certain pokemon and even if I technically wouldn't like their shiny form on any other mon, because they're my favorite they take the spot. I let a lot of pokemon biases go into my shiny preferences.

However I do prefer teal or dark green shinies, because teal is my favorite color.

Or anything with a blue/pink color scheme. I also like ice blue and grey as well.

There are some shinies I like despite not liking the mon. Toxicroak for example has an amazing shiny, I love the color combo. Would I pick it over Malamar? No

So basically my favorite shinies are based really off my experiences playing the games and mons I've attached myself on throughout the years

[bechnokid]

Thoughts on the new Pokémon games? Any favorite Pokémon or characters?

They are pretty good! My favorite character is Nemona and my favorite Pokemon is Chi-Yu, who I have lovingly named "Splashy".

I do have some more in-depth thoughts if you want to keep reading.

Graphics (5/10)

Probably some of the worst I've seen in a mainline game, despite the character and Pokemon models being really high-quality.

The low-quality draw distance is to be expected, but it's still pretty jarring seeing NPCs without their hand animations fully rendered. Some hands would look like 🤚 when holding a Pokeball or even just a pencil.

The environments are really lackluster, and the weather can cause the frame rate to drop into the single digits.

Glitches are plentiful, but not in a good way. Pokemon spawning in walls, HP bars glitching in Tera Raids, environments glitch when camera is not at an optimal angle, etc.

However, the Pokemon's textures look absolutely fantastic. I love how shiny the Magnemite line looks. :3 I kinda wish the particle effects were better on Pokemon like Skeledirge and Chi-Yu, but that's ok.

Story (10/10)

I'm so glad the story ended up so much better in SV than in SwSh. I remember not being able to play through Shield after playing Sword because of how boring the story was. Not this time, though. SV continued to keep me engaged throughout the whole thing.

(SPOILER ALERT) I kinda wish they put more effort into making Scarlet and Violet different from each other regarding the AI Sada and Turo. I don't think it would have been too farfetched to have Sada a golem because of the existence of legendary titans.

Arven's story is fantastic, and although he is not a favorite character of mine, I've really warmed up to him after learning his goal in healing his Mabosstiff.

Gameplay (7/10)

I really thought Gym Leaders, Titans, and Team Star Battles would be scaled. That would have been really cool...

I was deeply saddened that they decided to remove the majority of the QoL features from PLA, and reverted to its traditional turn-based gameplay. It isn't bad by any means, but it makes the game slower than it should be.

Being able to sneak up on Pokemon and catching them off-guard was really fun, but I wish it can be applied to also catching them and not just battling them.

However, auto-battling is really cool and fun!! I love it! Being able to bring out my Pokemon and battle other wild Pokemon really sped things up.

Follower Pokemon are back!! Although I kinda wished they changed the speeds of some of the Pokemon when they're running/walking with you. Chien-Pao, I know you have a walking animation, please just relax and walk with me!!

RIP sparkling sounds when finding shiny Pokemon. I understand that it makes finding them more exciting, but I think it makes it harder for those who have difficulty telling colors apart to find them. I don't really get having to remove a feature that would otherwise make finding shiny Pokemon more accessible to others.

Characters (8/10)

Although no one really got me all "doki-doki" like Guzma has, the cast was absolutely fantastic this time around.

I love that almost all of the gym leaders have their gym challenges as something they do on the side. Their passion is something else that they're into and they bring it into their Pokemon battles, whether it's baking, creating art, streaming, cooking, etc.

The Elite Four is fantastic, too. It's great seeing another Gym Leader become another member of the Elite Four. :3

That said, I don't trust Geeta.

Please help Larry.

Overall Score (7.5/10)

Pretty good! It's a good start to an open-world Pokemon game, but kinda falls behind compared to other open-world games out there that have surpassed it by a long shot and were released earlier! I mean like. The franchise is nearing its 30th anniversary and it still doesn't have voice acting of any kind.

It's an obvious result of dev crunch, and I really hope they space out release dates if it means getting better games. However, I don't think this will happen anytime soon.

[xmxisxforxmaybe]

Hi! Would you mind doing something with Elliot, smutty moment while the reader is trying to work from home from his apartment borrows his sweatshirt but things just get carried away? Thank you in advance!!

Elliot’s eyes flicked to the clock on his computer screen for the hundredth time.

When you had shown up last night, close to tears because the power was going to be out all morning in your neighborhood and you had a career defining Skype meeting at exactly 8:15 am, Elliot listened carefully before pulling the most normal response he could from his repertoire.

“Uh, you can spend the night and just work from my place. If you want.”

Your exclamation was difficult to interpret until you looked into Elliot’s eyes and breathed a sigh of relief.

“Thank you! I was hoping you would say that. Well, that or that you would hack the city’s electric grid just for me!” you teased, not at all paying attention to the way Elliot balked at your response.

“That’s illegal,” he replied in his typical monotone.

You giggled and lightly smacked his upper arm.

“I’m teasing! You’re good with your computers, but I don’t think anyone is that good,” you said, your face still full of laughter. “Otherwise, you would have hacked the lottery already and at least moved uptown.”

Elliot smiled nervously, which wasn’t all that different from the way he usually smiled.

“You know I don’t care about money.”

“I do—otherwise I wouldn’t be here, panicking about missing this meeting tomorrow. If it goes well, I’ll shoot to the top of the list for a promotion.”

“Is there anything I can do to help?”

“You’re already doing more than enough. I appreciate this. Just leave some room in your calendar for a celebratory dinner. I’ll let ya get gussied up, darlin’ and I’ll take ya somewheres fancy,” you said in a silly accent, making Elliot smile his sweet, three-point grin.

When it was time for bed, he insisted on taking the couch. You equally insisted there was room for two in his bed until you saw the look of horror on his face, then backed off.

“You’re a great friend, El,” you called softly through the dark apartment before you snuggled deep into his bedding, enjoying being all wrapped up in his scent.

Elliot fell asleep with a soft smile on his face, no more than a slight upturn at the corners of his mouth.

* * * * *

When you woke up to an Elliot with a towel wrapped around his waist and water droplets sliding from his wet hair down the muscles of his back, digging through his closet, you bit your lip to stifle a gasp. It was clear he thought you were asleep and as he padded back into the bathroom to get dressed, you had to fight to ignore the tingling sensation between your thighs.

Elliot was attractive, and it was impossible not to wonder if there would ever be more to your relationship. With guys less complicated than him, there would have already been something more. But Elliot had only ever made it clear he was interested in your friendship. Never had he indicated there was anything more he wanted.

Ignoring the desire to slide your fingers discreetly between your legs, knowing it would be very, very wrong to get yourself off in your friend’s bed after he was kind enough to sacrifice his privacy for you, you looked at your phone and shot up, not realizing you had already hit the snooze button . . . twice.

You were so busy getting yourself presentable from the waist up in record time that you barely heard Elliot say goodbye as he left for work. Your eyes flicked in the direction of his voice and you gave him a nanosecond of a wave goodbye.

Elliot shook his head as he shut the door, then smiled as he locked you in.

All day, he thought about you sitting in his bed, the contents of your makeup bag everywhere, your hair pulled into a presentable ballerina bun, your bare legs that looked so soft and shiny in the dim light of his apartment poking out as you braced yourself on the floor, and he wondered what it would be like to touch you, to feel his fingertips ghost over your shin before sliding up—

“Night, Elliot,” Angela called before Ollie ushered her out of the door.

Elliot blinked and looked at the clock again.

5:04 pm.

He gathered up his things and scrambled out the door to catch the train home, deep in thought.  

Meanwhile, your meeting had gone perfectly, and you had gotten a lot of work done. The only hitch in your whole day was the fact that it was freezing in Elliot’s apartment. You fiddled with the thermostat and kicked at the radiator like you had seem him do, but nothing happened.

Eyeing his favorite piece of clothing warily, you figured that as long as you didn’t get it dirty or manage to tear a hole in it, he wouldn’t mind. You laughed a little as you nestled into it, realizing it was snug across the chest.

You thought back to Elliot’s towel-clad body and realized his lean muscles were deceiving; he really was a skinny thing.

Snuggled back under the covers, you had switched to working on your laptop and were just about to go through your last round of emails for the day when the keys sounded in Elliot’s door.

His eyes found you instantly, and you couldn’t tell if it was relief or disappointment that crossed his features.

That was until he took a few steps into the apartment and his brow furrowed.

“Is . . . is that my hoodie?”

“I hope you don’t mind. It’s absolutely freezing in here.”

Instead of moving toward the radiator, Elliot stepped closer to the bed where you were situated, giving no inclination that he had even heard you.

His eyes seemed to be memorizing you as they scanned over every inch of your existence until you cleared your throat and sat up, reaching for the zipper at the base of your throat.

“I’ll just, uh, put this back—”

“No,” Elliot growled in a tone you had never heard before and one that made you go completely still.

He blinked and stepped back, realizing he had done something wrong.

“Leave it on . . . I mean.”

Slowly, your hands fell away from the zipper. You shut your laptop without looking away from his intense gaze and moved it to a spot on the floor beside his mattress.

“Is there . . . anything . . . else you’d like me to do?” you said slowly, figuring now was as good of a time as any to test the new way Elliot was looking at you.

He licked his lips, and shrugged out of his backpack, letting it fall to the floor with a clunk.

“Stand up.”

You took a breath and pushed the blankets from your hips, giving you enough room to step out of the bed. You hadn’t changed out of your sleep shorts, not really seeing a reason to since your meeting was only from the waist up.

Elliot’s eyes ran slowly over your body, once. Twice.

You felt self-conscious and reached up to smooth your hair, then for lack of anything else to do with them, you slid your hands into the pockets of his hoodie, your right hand connecting with his lighter.

You watched as Elliot swallowed before taking a few more steps toward you, his eyes never leaving your face.

“Take . . . will you, I mean,” he said shaking his head and starting again. “Will you take off your shorts?”

Ohhh, your mind and body thought at the same time.  

“Uh huh,” you answered, pulling your hands from his hoodie pockets and working to untie the drawstring on your shorts before hooking your thumbs in at the hips and pulling them down. It hadn’t occurred to you to care what kind of underwear you were wearing, so now all you could do was pray they were cute.

Elliot’s hoodie stopped right below your hips and the slightest movement would let him know what they looked like, so you stayed still, waiting to see what he would do next.

He cocked his head to the side, slightly, as his eyes swept over your bare legs. When he looked up at you, he smirked.

“Looks good on you.”

Christ.

You crossed the room and grabbed him by the Allsafe badge he hadn’t even taken off yet and pulled him in for a kiss. He chuckled against your lips, probably from nerves, but that didn’t stop you and eventually he got the point, bringing his hands up to pull your hips against his.

You licked at his lower lip, and he parted his mouth in a sigh, letting you stick your tongue in before he started kissing you back. He was so warm, and everything about him felt so good.

When you felt his hands clutch at your ass, you made a noise of appreciation before closing the kiss to look him in the eye. It took him a moment to open his lids, and when he did, you admired the way the undiscernible color of his irises darkened.

“Does this mean you wanna be more than friends? I’m not really a one-off kinda gal.”

Elliot’s lips twitched up in a quick, shy smile.

“I’m not very good at this kind of thing.”

“My panties are soaked, El. From a fucking kiss. I think you’re pretty good at it.”

Elliot laughed and pressed his forehead to yours.

“No . . . I can do that part pretty okay. I mean the more than friends part.”

“Like a relationship?”

“Yeah. That’s not, uh, my forte.”

“No, shit,” you said laughing and moving back to look at him.

His eyes were the happiest you had ever seen them, so you pressed on.

“We can take this very, very slow.”

Elliot nodded, then his brows contracted.

“Uh, how slow . . . because . . .” he said, as he adjusted himself under his dress pants.

You narrowed your eyes and thought for a moment.

“What brought on this . . . shift?” you asked, reaching out to lightly run your fingers over his bulge.

Elliot swallowed, then explained, “Seeing you in my bed this morning. You’re pretty when you’re chaotic,” he said with a slight smile, and you laughed.

“Is that all?”

“I couldn’t stop . . . couldn’t stop thinking about your legs in those little shorts. I kept thinking about what it would feel like to touch them. They look so soft.”

“Let’s start with that, then,” you said, pulling him toward the bed. “Sit.”

He sat with a little bounce, then looked expectantly up at you.

Moving so that you were standing between his legs, you looked down and softly said, “Touch me.”

Elliot’s lips parted as his eyes immediately turned to your bare legs.

He reached both hands out and placed them on top of your thighs before moving them slightly up, then circling them around to the back. His fingertips were just below the cheeks of your ass, but he slid his hands back down—past your knees and down your calves before he shifted to the front and ran his hands all the way up to where he had begun.

You reached out to steady yourself on his shoulders, shocked that such a simple touch was leaving you literally weak in the knees.

“Is, uh . . . this okay,” Elliot asked, his fingertips flexing up and down on your thighs as he paused to check your facial expression.

“I think I need to lie down,” you said with a smile.

He smiled back, and for the first time today, you felt warm, despite the loss of your shorts and his blankets.

Maneuvering onto the bed, you laid back against his pillows, bent your knees for a little leverage, and parted your legs, inviting him to get close enough to keep touching you.

Elliot kicked off his shoes and climbed onto his knees, sitting back on his haunches as he wiggled into a position between your feet.

This time, he started there, stroking the tops of your feet before sliding up and down your legs, gently kneading your calf muscles and your thigh muscles when he felt inclined to change up the pressure of his touch.

“Elliot,” you breathed, your eyes closed and your body’s heat continuing to climb.

Elliot removed his hands from your legs and shifted his position so he could lay on top of you. He kissed you this time, his lips moving slowly, occasionally pressing harder or softer, in a perfect echo of the way he had been touching your legs. When his tongue dipped into your mouth, you bucked up into his hips, your center connecting with his hard cock.

He groaned, and it was the hottest sound you had ever heard.

“Can—” you panted from under his kiss. “Can I touch you?”

Elliot moved your hand directly to his dick and pressed hard, and normally, you would have laughed at his eagerness, but you were a mess beneath him.

Making quick work of his trouser fastenings, you pushed open his pants and slid your hand into his boxer-briefs and grasped his hard cock.

He groaned again, making you shiver with need.

“Can you touch me, too?” you all but begged.

Elliot immediately reached between your legs and pushed your panties to the side, fumbling through your wetness, clearly not expecting that you really meant it when you said you were soaked from that first kiss.

He did chuckle against your mouth this time, and you joined him.

“Toldja,” you said with a smirk as you started jerking him off.

Elliot’s hips were pushing into your hand, and yours were pushing into his. He slid around your pussy for a few seconds before making a beeline for your clit, your need to get off too evident to entertain any exploration tonight.

Elliot’s fingers were skilled, and he quickly brought you to an orgasm by rubbing sharp, consistent circles over your aching clit with his thumb. Your pumps of his cock faltered as you let yourself go, but then you quickly doubled your efforts, wanting nothing more than to watch his face while he came.

“Y/N,” Elliot hissed, as he bucked into your hand, his cum spilling over your palm and coating it quickly as you continued to stroke him through his orgasm.

His elbows shook and he rolled off of you, onto his back. He was breathing heavy and his cheeks were tinged pink, his lips still glossy and swollen from all of your kissing.

“Wow,” he breathed out.

“I agree.”

Elliot looked over at you and smiled, a genuine smile that lit up his eyes.

“I’m glad your power went out. And glad my heat broke today, too”

You turned your head up to the ceiling and laughed, tugging the zipper down on Elliot’s hoodie to let your too-hot body cool down.

“What a series of fortunate events,” you said, leaning over to press a kiss to his forehead.

[glitradora]

Oh could you do a blind!adora AU where maybe like once Adora becomes She-Ra she gets Toph-like perception ability based on her other senses? Just a thought. I be Catra would be super protective of her her they were in the Horde

send me an AU and i’ll tell you my headcanons for it (1/15)

au masterlist

Even tho she can’t see Adora is the best tactical fighter the Horde ever had it’s like she can predict the future, like she can know how the other person will act just by their voice

Catra thinks it’s some of Shadow Weaver’s witchcraft

But she also knows Adora obsesses over every detail so maybe it’s just how she adapted to survive.

For most of her life Catra has been Adora’s eyes, they would sit for hours as kids with Catra just describing things while Adora listened.

She can pretty much navigate everything with just a description of the place from Catra.

It’s like her brain is a super machine

But this “weakness” in her part is not seen as great by most of the Horde, the only reason she’s still even around is that Shadow Weaver as stuck up for her at every turn

That could only go so far, however - she hasn’t been in classes with the rest of the kids since she was 7, once the play fighting turned into sharp edges and metal rods. 

Once Catra could no longer protect Adora and herself and the teachers encouraged the other kids to gang up on them.

Since then she became kinda like Shadow Weaver’s apprentice. 

Catra says she’s more like a slave - doing all the things Shadow Weaver doesn’t want to do.

She can’t see how Shadow Weaver does magic so she feels safe having Adora around- and Adora loves being around cause the runestone calls to her. Sings even when she’s in the room. It’s not quite like an image in her mind, not any that Catra described before anyways. But Adora imagines this is what colors feel like.

Since Adora is not a Horde Fighter, Catra took that spot. 

Once Adora wasn’t in classes anymore Catra quickly raised through the ranks must to the other recruits disdain.

She’s most teachers favorite and even Hordak has taken an interest in her- so much so she’s the youngest ever force captain.

Still - once it’s all over at the end of the day - Catra back from conquering some Princess place, and Adora done with her chores, they still lay together in the same bed like they did as kids and Catra had to protect Adora.

They’re too big for it now but it’s home - something that no other place in the Horde ever felt like.

(In this AU the sword has been waiting for Adora longer than in the show)

Adora finds the sword because it tells her where to go. It does sound like Catra- not even slightly - but it has the same care with her. 

It tells her about things in her path to avoid, about animals she’ll hear that mean no harm. It takes her straight to itself with such love that Adora tricks herself into believing it is Catra guiding her. That it’s fine to be following this voice.

Catra notices her gone only slightly too late. Adora just disappeared into the treeline when she looks. 

She panics for a second before seeing the leafs moving. Adora is rarely out of the Frightzone- Catra can only vaguely remember the last time. 

Unlike Catra who has been leading attacks for close to a year - even meet a couple princesses.

This one was a short mission and she managed to convince Hordak she needed Adora there - give her a bit of freedom for a change. 

Perhaps this is good. For Adora to feel like she’s on a real adventure for once. 

(Catra leaves Lonnie in charge and follows a few dozen feet behind)

Which means Catra sees her finding the sword - or more she sees her stopping in front of a few branches and start ripping them off

After a few minutes, shes almost going to stop her before she sees there’s something there. Something all these plants grew around. But how would Adora know about it.

Adora careful pulls out each vine as the voice tells her - her hands and forearms with small cuts by now but it’s ok. Because the closer she gets the more clear everything is. 

Cause from the second she started every time she touches it - whatever it is under all that - she sees a little glimpse. 

A tree, a patch of grass, a hidden catgirl behind her. She’s beautiful just as Adora imagined. 

Adora smiles at that but doesn’t stop pulling things off. She can’t- because things are sharper and clearer and she needs to know.

A sword she realizes in one of the glimpses - the voice seems happy with her excitement.

“YOU STOP RIGHT THERE THAT SWORD IS PROPRIETY OF THE REBEL ALLIANCE”

The voice comes from somewhere to the right - but she doesn’t have time to react before she’s being tackled. 

Soon Catra is in the fight too with razor-sharp focus pulling these two people off Adora who is looking around in fear. She can no longer see, blurry or otherwise.

She doesn’t know to which side the sword is anymore either.

Catra - once Adora is safely behind her goes more into her usual persona.

She’s teasing them - a Shiny and Arrow-Boy. Adora hardly thinks these are their names but Catra seems to know them quite well.

And the girl seems quite annoyed with her.

Adora ignores them and starts trying to get to her feet.

Is the boy how actually notices - Catra and Shiny to entertained with each other banter - “Is- is she ok?”

“Bow she’s a Horde Soldier! We don’t care”

“But she looks-”

“Blind.” its Catra who interrupts. Adora doesn’t much care she just found the sword again. And now she actually has it fully in her hand.

“I was gonna say scared” Adora barely notices the words - slightly pitchy as if this Bow is embarrassed for commenting on it.

But Adora couldn’t care less - because she can see now. The trees and the grass and the cat girl and the other two, a slightly shorter girl with puffy hair and a taller boy with a bow in his hand. And she’s crying.

Well see is not the right description. It’s not just colors like Shadow Weavers magic, but something more concrete. 

Something more solid - but not the world Catra talks about. It’s a world made up of electricity - ever changing. Like a life force, only she can see that surrounds the things giving them shape.

Colors are only suggestions. Like someone decided to tell Adora how to feel about these things.

Catra is all sharp and angles, bold reds and warm browns. 

The girl is softer - pinks and purples and blues - but the electricity bounces yellow of her. 

The boy is warm but contrasting - dark browns and soft beige. Bold red but soft purple.

Adora doesn’t realize she’s full crying sitting on the floor hugging the sword until Catra moves to touch her shoulder. None of them say much - even Glimmer (she later learns her name) has softened, the yellow volts turning soft pink. 

They all give her a long time to calm down, then they give her a long time to explain, and then Catra and Glimmer reach an agreement about Adora and the Sword. 

Because Glimmer hates the Horde, and she doesn’t much like Catra either (no matter how much Bow seems to disagree) and she never met this Adora before today. But she’s not a monster to try and separate her from the Sword. But she can’t let the Horde keep first one’s tech either.

And Catra is on top of her career, and she can’t believe she’s working with tweedle dim and tweedle dumb over her, but she loves Adora. And if the Sword is going, Adora is going and if Adora is going she guesses she will go to Brightmoon too. 

And like the decision has nothing to do with the big bug they find a few minutes later and how Adora gets like - really big and buff and how she kinda sees Glimmer staring.

[atrainernamedradish]

Top 10 Least Favorite Pokemon

You know what’s harder than making a top favorites list? A least favorite one. I was particular about this list because I wanted my own personal opinion on the matter instead of adding to the echo chamber that can be the fandom’s. I don’t hate these Pokemon. These are the ones I care for the least. Also, the placements kept changing for this list, but I feel like I finally put everyone on here in the right order now.

10) Whismur Line

The only reason this line is the Normal typing is because Game Freak hasn’t made the Sound typing official. Hell, Electric, or even Steel, would have made more sense. But nope we got these weird fleshy sound-based things that I’m never excited to see.

9) Greedent

I take back everything I said about Diggersby (still wished it didn’t have the belching model cry though), and I’m directing that towards Greedent. It looks like your typical fat, lazy, and not particularly bright cartoon character. Almost feel like they were a bit lazy in this design. Like… they could have done something more, or less since it’s large enough. I feel like Game Freak is trying to recreate a likeness to Snorlax, since it’s the poster child for obese Pokemon, but keeps falling short by giving us the ugliest designs. We don’t need more fat normal types. We’ve got plenty.

8) Electrode

Hey guys, let’s make this Pokeball based Pokemon flip upside down, make it less pissed off and call it an evolution! Also, it’s going to be crazy fast as well explode, most likely killing anything nearby, because why the fuck not? Boring and dangerous… what a match made in hell for a design!

7) Pheromosa

It’s an almost 7 foot tall sentient cockroach with legendary stats. Nope. Just nope. *flees*

6) Grimmsnarl Line

I have been disappointed with this evolutionary line since seeing the leaks of Impidimp. I know a lot of Faerie lore and it ticks me off that they chose a Goddamn Goblin for the first Dark/Fairy type. Also, and I know not all Faeries are cute and cuddly, but why does Game Freak keep trying to sneak in ugly Fairy types? About 95% of the Fairy typing has a cute or pleasing ascetic. That’s one of its themes, that and trying to throw pink on everything, so why give us this ugly line?

The only indicator of this thing remotely being Fairy typing at a glance is that it’s pink. I would have never gotten Fairy otherwise from it. Goblins might be in Faerie Tales, but they aren’t Faeries.

The only one in this line that remotely gives off the Dark typing to me is Morgrem. The other two not so much. Putting black on a Pokemon is maybe another indicator of the Dark typing, but even then it ain’t helping…?

Overall to me this thing is goofy to ugly looking with its design and typing a complete mess. It irritates me that our first combination of Fairy and Dark is this line…

Also, using it in a playthrough and it pisses me off that I’m not getting a Fairy move until it reaches its final evolution! That’s if I don’t want to grind up watt points in the Wild Area for a Fairy TR, or beat Opal before getting said evolution!

5) Shiinotic

Fairy typing makes sense for Morelull when you realize what it’s based on. Hell, even Ghost does. But Shiinotic? I don’t care if mushrooms are a big thing in Faerie Culture. You can’t just design some ugly ass alien mushroom hybrid then slap the Fairy typing on it because of mushrooms or lore from a pre evolution! While we’re at it let’s make the Amoongus and Breloom line Fairies too!

Morelull should have been a single stage line. It would have made sense. But no. They just wanted to make an ugly Fairy type just to prove they could say: “hey fandom I know you’re sick of all the cute and pink Fairy types so here’s an ugly one to change things up!”

And don’t get me *started* on that ugly ass shiny! Game Freak: bright yellow and muddy browns are a terrible color combination! Guess why?

4) Spinda

You know how I praised Alcremie for having multiple forms because of what it was and why it made sense for it? Well I have the opposite opinion regarding Spinda.

If I didn’t believe in the golden rule of everyone having a favorite of each Pokemon then I’d very much assume this thing wasn’t liked by anyone.

Everything about its design annoys me. Why is it a panda? And before anyone tries to tell me otherwise, it’s in its American/English name. Why is it in a constant state of vertigo? I literally was trying to think of a typing it would be better off as instead of the Normal typing and none come to mind. So it’s normal because a) it’s an animal or b) because they needed to give it a typing and no other typing fit.

And out of ALL the Pokemon why does this one have an almost endless possibility of “forms”? This thing has got to be a living dex collector’s worst nightmare!

3) Archeops

This Pokemon is on here for pure personal reasons. Technically there are a few other Pokemon that I feel the same towards, but this one was the worst about it.

You know you have a stupid powerful stat as a non-psuedo legendary and legendary when you need an ability to nerf you. What’s worse is when you need a pretty bulky Pokemon to soak up the damage you reap before said ability does nerf you.

It was always Goddamn terrifying to run into this Pokemon in White 2. Not only was a good chunk of my team weak to Flying, but my Samurott couldn’t take more than one hit from it. Not to mention it didn’t do enough super effective damage to OHKO this thing. So I was never happy to run into this thing because I would only get out of the fight with a lot of collateral damage to my party!

This wasn’t the only Pokemon that was this fucking difficult to deal with in Unova. There is definitely a power imbalance in these games which made playing them a pain in the ass. Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE Black 2 & White 2, but fuck me if this wasn’t my biggest issues with those games…

(Some of y'all are probably wondering about Slaking, and Slaking is actually easier to deal with thanks to its typing and ability readily triggering.)

2) Pelipper

This Pokemon was originally going to be my least favorite Water type on my favorite and least favorite typings lists, but I think its placement on this list suits it better.

I honestly don’t mind its pre-evolution Wingull. Wingull is kinda cute. Wonder Trade had me groaning every time I saw one, but that was more the player’s fault than anything.

Pelipper is just such a poorly designed Pokemon. Like, what were they thinking when they essentially fused the beak and stomach together? How can this thing carry its front heavy, well front? I assume it can handle all of that weight being airborne since I doubt it can get around any other way with its stubby little feet.

Then they gave it the Drizzle ability and suddenly people give a shit about its ugly ass…

The only time I’ve “willingly” used one was in my Wonderlocke, which was only due to the fact that I was in dire need of a water type, and I'll tell you that right now that I didn’t want to resort to using it. I’m pretty sure it died at the very end in the Champion battle… wasn’t all that sad to lose it if I’m being honest.

This isn’t just reserved for this Pokemon, but I absolutely hate the dual typing of Water/Flying. Nothing says “throw a rock at me” more than this typing combination. 

Overall I just don’t like anything about this Pokemon.

1) Greninja

This Pokemon used to be a lot lower on this list, but as I mentioned right before the list that the order changed as I was making it. I can promise you that this Pokemon isn’t on here because of how popular it is (there are others that would be on here if that was the case). There are many other reasons I will go over as to why this one is on the list.

The first is my experience using a basic one in XY. It’s learn set of moves is terrible, and that’s because it learns a lot of physical moves despite having a much better Special Attack. When I thought about the aspects of a ninja’s special attack being higher than physical it made much more sense. It had little to no options for Dark type moves with one of the best moves for it not being available till you’ve gotten the 8th badge for Waterfall. Greninja was the weakest member of my team with my Aromatisse putting in much more work than it! If Greninja is not competitively trained as well as has any of its hidden abilities then it’s not really that useful. I kept the one from that playthrough because I don’t have the heart to release it or get rid of it…

The second is its design. I very much don’t care for it (its tongue scarf is gross!). Its middle evolution looks so much better to me, and it made me sad evolving it into this ugly thing…

The third is its typing. I’ve had some time to think about it and I’ve wondered to myself: why is Greninja a Dark type? Thinking of the history, and to some extent the mythology of ninjas, nothing screams Dark type to me. I’m also taking into account of Dark being Evil in Japan, and nothing about ninja inherently screams Evil or Dark typing. Then I found myself thinking about its other typing in Water which brought me to the conclusion that the only reason Greninja is a Water type is for two reasons: 1) It’s a starter and 2) it’s a frog.

So you’re probably thinking by this point: “well Radish if you don’t like its typings then what would you change them to?” Unfortunately, I’d keep Water since it’s not the only Pokemon to have a typing based on the animal it is (looking at you Poliwag line!). Dark typing would be replaced with Ghost since ninjas in their lore and mythology can traverse and interact with the spiritual world.

I will address the elephant in the room for my closing thoughts on this Pokemon: Greninja and the fandom. I wholeheartedly believe that if Greninja didn’t have the hidden abilities that it did that it wouldn’t be as favored as it is among the fanbase. As someone who used a basic ability one in hopes of giving it a chance I was greatly disappointed, and didn’t understand why this Pokemon was so popular. That’s why I feel as though the competitive scene is where it has gotten all of its fame from. People give Charizard so much shit for being overrated but do they for Greninja? (Not a big fan of Charizard for those who wanna accuse me as such.)

[paranoidwino]

stars

Read it here at AO3.

For @bloomsoftly , with the generous help and tips from @dresupi (who is now third best person in the universe, thank you so much!). So honey, I hope you like it!

Souls were, all in all, a very colorful thing.

Everybody had one, regardless of belief. Everybody needed one, but they pretended they were a big affair.

To Darcy, who had been able to see souls since forever, they were nothing but colored dots floating inside of very cute packages, depending on the person they belonged to.

They were a trinket -- if you will -- to be observed and admired until otherwise needed, and that usually came after death.

And it was Truth.

So she wasn't really prepared for the shiny golden aura surrounding Dr Jane Foster, astrophysicist.

It was blinding, overwhelming and beautiful; Darcy kinda wanted it.

Mermaids were suckers for shiny, glittering things, not unlike dragons (but let's be real, dragons were just rude lizards...), and they showed it by collecting the oddest things and showing off as much jewelry they could get away with (and with the long tails they had, it was a lot).

It probably wasn't possible to collect a soul, Darcy had never tried to anyway, but she unconsciously gravitated towards it regardless.

She started showering Jane with food and pop-tarts, content to bask in the golden light that was Jane Foster, and that was that.

New Mexico sucked and chafed at her skin for all the wrong reasons.

She was used to sand, but not hot sand and frankly the dry heat was disgusting and so was the sun (you stupid star, you!) and the only respite were the frequent showers she was able to take (who cared about hot water anyway).

She was sick and tired of it all after six days, and ordered an inflatable kiddie pool after ten.

“Jane! Jane!”

Jane Foster blinked owlishly at her friend and mentor, Erik Selvig. He looked pale and was waving frantically at her.

“What? And why are you whispering?” She mimicked his tone.

“There's a mermaid in a wading pool on your roof!”

“...What?” What time was it anyway? Was she drunk? Was he drunk?

But Erik kept gesticulating wildly to the roof. She sighed deeply and followed.

There was a shiny, bronze tail peeking from an inflatable yellow plastic pool that she was certain hadn't been there last she checked.

She gaped, turned to Erik, pointed to the pool and gaped again.

Erik nodded solemnly.

“There's a mermaid in a kiddie pool on my roof.” She repeated dumbly and then flinched at her friend's shushing noises.

“The mermaid can hear you,” came sarcastically from the pool.

Wait a minute, she knew that voice.

“...Darcy?!”

“So...” Jane was going to be cool about it, cool as cucumber. “You're a mermaid?”

The tail in front of her flapped a bit jokingly and the caudal fin splashed her with salt water. “...Did you use the kitchen salt for this?”

“Yes, and yes!” Darcy confirmed airily.

“You're a mermaid, honest to God mermaid.”

“Yes.”

“A real mermaid?” that was Erik.

“Yes,” and now Darcy sounded exasperated. “Look, it's not a big deal...”

“Not a- Not a big deal?!” Jane asked faintly. “Darcy, you have a tail, scales, and let's not forget the fact that you're a mermaid.”

Darcy clicked her tongue, pushed her weight on her arms and managed to take a sitting position, her tail folded neatly under her. “I think we've already established that I am, indeed, a mermaid Jane. And the amount of times the word 'mermaid'  has been used in the last five minutes should be illegal.” She stood wobbly on the side of the inflatable pool and rolled out of it. Under the sun of New Mexico, her skin dried at an incredible speed and the more it dried up, the more her scales disappeared.

Erik sputtered indignantly.

From then on, any time Jane wasn't on her data and calculations and pictures, she spent with Darcy, pelting her with questions.

It wasn't so bad, Darcy mused, at least Jane didn't complain when the salt disappeared or that she hogged the pool for herself.

“So, you have a different civilization?”

“Uh-uh”

“And different technology?”

“That's correct.”

She'd been extremely disappointed when she'd heard that no, there were no astronomers. “Jane, we don't even see the stars from our home. We hardly see the sun! We don't even like it. I mean!” she stuttered quickly, “it's beautiful and all, but it's so far away and there's places in the sea we haven't yet explored, why go up when you can go down?”

Jane was very curious about it all. Favorite foods (We eat fish eggs and algae, Jane, there's not much I can cook for you in New Mexico) and cultural differences (well no we don't have internet and I don't know how I'll live without Tumblr, but we do have sound based tech...) and literature (we have a crap-ton of myths you don't have Janey, we're a completely different species).

And then...

“You haven't explored the world?” Jane couldn't really wrap her mind about not exploring any part of the world they lived in.

“No?” Darcy smiled patiently, “There are places we couldn't go even if we wanted. Like the Arctic” she said matter of factly.

“Too cold?”

“Nah, we used to live there, but then something started zapping our tails off seventy years or so ago.” She shuddered. “We don't go there anymore, the energy is sick, like a disease just waiting to chip off your life.”

And again,

“So, stop me if it's too personal, but...” They were lounging on the roof. Well, she was lounging. Jane was sitting on a chair, with her head propped on her hands as she leaned closer, “How does even 'it' work?” she blushed furiously, “I mean...”

Darcy raised her eyebrows as much as she could, then gave a pointed look to her legs and looked at her.

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh.” she nodded, amused, and went back to her fruit juice.

“Where does the tail come from then?!” Jane asked bewildered.

Darcy made a long, loud noise with the plastic straw. “We reproduce like plants, cut a limb and wait for it to grow and take root-”

“WHAT!”

“...I'm kidding Jane,” she deadpanned, “It's act-Ow! Ow! Stop it!” she laughed as Jane mock hit her with her chair's pillow. The fruit juice dropped on the ground unceremoniously.

She pouted at the loss of her juice. It was good juice.

“Seriously, Darcy!”

Darcy cleared her throat “Look, it's a lot like fish, okay? Eggs and all...” She was a bit uncomfortable with the subject.

Jane blinked. “That sounds anticlimactic.”

“Well, it's not exactly like that,” She shrugged helplessly; maternity wasn't high on her priority list, “there's a lot of stuff involved, like emotions and hormones and magic... it's a big mumbo jumbo you actually need to take a class for?”

“Magic.” Jane said skeptically.

“Well yes, that's normal, right? No magic, no baby and all that.”

“That's... sorry, but the scientist in me refuses to believe magic is responsible for fish tails.”

“And then you can go to Atlantis and tell our people that we've been doing this wrong since the dawn of times. Have fun with the Chief.” Darcy sassed back.

“...Atlantis is real.”

“JANE!”

Diametrically different from Jane, Erik had instead become a very tough customer.

He refused the cookies and the food Darcy offered and ate meals with them grudgingly.

Darcy couldn't really fault him for this, he'd grown up with tales and horror stories of merpeople just waiting to drown unsuspecting sailors. He wasn't wrong theoretically, but it'd been some 3000 years or so that they'd last done so (not keen on becoming stone and sinking in the ocean, no sirree) and Darcy liked to think they'd come a long way from that.

The big monument made of hundreds of sunken sisters wasn't the reason, nope.

She didn't really understand how the story had been remembered as long as it was. They'd stopped caring about the ‘living stuff’ ages ago.

“Why are you here?” He asked her out of the blue one day, when Jane was distracted by whatever thingy was pinging and making funny noises.

Darcy turned and looked at him, confused. “I'm studying political science.”

“Yes. “ He said a bit more forcefully, “but that doesn't explain why you're here. I don't believe this was your only choice.”

Darcy's gaze flitted immediately to Jane. Beautiful, shiny Jane.

“She's shiny.” She responded automatically.

Erik's eyes widened and hardened in three seconds. “What does that mean? Do you wish her harm?”

Darcy frowned. “Of course not. She's shiny, not food. I don't know where you're getting your ideas from, but the deadly singers were all turned into stone something like three thousands years ago and we like it that way.” The corners of her mouth lifted a bit, “I just like looking at her soul.”

Erik gaped. “You look at her soul.”

Darcy nodded. “Yours too, but hers is shinier.” And she said it with complete nonchalance.

“You can see souls.”

“What's with this incredulity at everything I say?” she complained. “Souls are the whole point of our existence. The Guides to the Other Side is not a fancy title, we'd suck if we didn't know where to send people off. Like, really suck. Imagine the mess.”

Erik had nothing to say to that, but sent her particularly pensive looks in the next few days.

And then, the Star-man happened.

Darcy watched Thor as he moved around the gas station that had become her home.

He smelled. Like, 'look at me I come from the sky' smelled. He was pleasant to look at but Laeto have mercy, it made all of her insides tingle the wrong way.

Jane and Erik didn't believe for a second that he came from the sky, but she did.

And it was fine.

The presence of a Star-man didn't fill her with joy or any other fuzzy feeling, but she could ignore it.

She could pretend the presence of a race that had heralded the coming of the Cold ones and the near destruction of her people didn't scare her witless, she could play nice.

What she could not tolerate was the fact that he had started gravitating around the shiniest soul in the house: Jane.

Because Jane's light was hers. She'd claimed it.

The Asgardian had no right to come and take it away from her.

She found herself showing him her teeth dangerously whenever she could get away with it every time he approached Jane, or got too close. As soon as the tiny astrophysicist turned her back here she was, hissing.

She wasn't stupid. She knew that even without his full strength Thor was completely out of her league, so much powerful it wasn't even funny. If a Challenge were to be issued, Darcy had no delusions to win. She'd have no chance, but she couldn't help it. This was her territory.

Erik had noticed that, and was torn between amusement and worry.

Jane was oblivious, but Thor had noticed.

“I know not what ails you, Lady Darcy.” It was Thor who approached her first.

Darcy’s mood had steadily worsened as the days passed, followed by an unease which hadn’t ceased since the moment she’d first smelled and tasered him (that had felt good).

Not three hours before, she’d been almost forced to make up a story and cover his sorry ass from SHIELD, and that’d been a pain (and yep, they were totally going to nail her for this, possibly as a mounted fish on a wall), and so she wasn’t in the best mood.

Darcy hesitated.

She was being unjust. Of course, Thor was arrogant and presumptuous. He had come from a race that historically reveled in the blood of her people (okay, not really, but technically the Asgardians’ war had brought trouble to her people, so...). But it wasn’t really his fault all that had happened, and SHIELD was putting his hands in pies that really didn’t belong to them.

Thor had also mellowed quite a bit since whatever had happened with the magic hammer, but…

“You smell,” she blurted out.

Thor frowned.

“You smell like danger, and wind, and the last time someone like you visited this planet the Cold Ones were there, too.”

Thor’s confusion cleared. “You are of the Deep,” he stated. “I had no idea some of you still lived.”

Darcy nodded. She hadn’t expected him to recognize her race without the customary appearance. Especially since she’d stopped using the pool once he’d begun living with them. No sense in tempting Fate. “Yes. And you herald disaster, Asgardian.” She hissed back defiantly.

The frown was back. “I do not wish harm on this planet,” he assured seriously.

“And yet...” She stared into his eyes, chin raised. “What we wish and what happens are not always the same.”

She didn’t have to explain her reasoning much more, for not a minute later, she was blinded by immense light. Stars exploded in front of her and she shielded her eyes. The smell of overpowered sweetness and spice overwhelmed her. “Ippido have mercy, what is this?!” she exclaimed. “Another Star-man?”

It wasn’t. It was four of them, with their powers and immortality, too.

If Thor gave her the creeps, these four made her feel weak. She had to run. She had to take Jane away and hide her.

Her subconscious was screeching at her. Immortals were sick on their own, five immortals all together was madness. She could hardly see anymore, blinded as she was.

She sunk to the floor and literally crawled to her room, away from all the crazy, and padded on the floor until she found her sunglasses.

A quick glance downstairs showed that yes, while their presence was obnoxious, she could now see properly without risking a cornea flash burn.

“Why are you wearing sunglasses?” Jane whispered when she took a look at her.

“These people’s souls are trying to blind me, boss lady,” she whispered back.

“Oh. Is that a thing?”

“...it is now.”

The Asgardians were exactly the same as Thor. Boisterous, loud and at least ten times brighter than Jane.

Darcy didn’t like them, at all.

She felt she should be intrigued by the silver glow of Sif, or the vibrant red of the other men, but the smell and the stillness of it all really ruined it for her. It was like watching a beautiful rock. Shiny, but immovable and immutable forever. She was bored by the third minute.

And then, the Destroyer happened.

“I don’t want to say ‘I told you so’” she grumbled to Thor, as soon as she was  able to look  him in the eye. His brightness was burning at her skin. What. The. Hell. “But, I told you so. Your people are heralds of disaster, there is no other way you can look at it.”

Thor looked contrite and sincere in his apologies and Darcy felt sorry for him because the situation his friends were causing was terrible for him too. he couldn't imagine what a Crown Prince was to do when his brother went insane and decided to assassinate him for a shot at the throne (well, his brother actually was on the throne now so maybe not too  long  a shot).

“I did not wish for any of this to happen, Lady Darcy,” he said, his deep voice and expression grave. “But I do accept that it is my fault the Destroyer ever came upon this village. And it is my responsibility, to see that Loki is shown the error of his ways.”

They rushed to the Bifrost rune (because the Einstein-Rosen bridge? It was a thing, apparently.), and Thor looked at her -- really looked -- like he had that morning, when he had recognized her for what she was. “I trust you, to keep her safe.”

Darcy felt absurdly annoyed by it all. They had talked about this, hadn't they? Maybe the point wasn't clear enough to him. So she straightened from head to toe, and while she hardly reached his shoulders, she tried to appear as serious and intimidating as she could. “I look after what's mine,” she said bravely.

Erik choked, while Jane looked as if she'd missed something important. She had, but that was not the point.

Thor nodded solemnly. And then he left.

And Jane was inconsolable for a while, and then determination made its way into her soul, and her light sparked anew. They would look for him and bring him back.

And as much as the idea of an Asgardian anywhere near Jane made her break out in cold sweat, Darcy could play nice. She would. For Jane.

Because Jane loved the stars.

And while Jane watched the stars, Darcy watched Jane.

[thesteadydietofeverything]

The Crash Bandicoot N. Sane Trilogy is a (fun) shallow novelty

In a recent Time interview, Sony Europe Exec Jim Ryan argued against the concept of backwards compatibility à la Xbox as a viable business plan, positing that for as many people that ask for it, very few actually take advantage of it.  “That,” he said, “and I was at a Gran Turismo event recently where they had PS1, PS2, PS3 and PS4 games, and the PS1 and the PS2 games, they looked ancient, like why would anybody play this?”  His statements may reflect the actual opinions of a certain segment of the gaming community, but they also come off as shortsighted and just kinda...dumb.  He’s (first of all) bashing products once made by his own company, which for pure business reasons sounds some alarms.  But more than that, he’s making an argument against the durability of games, asserting that unlike other forms of art, they have an expiration date, largely connected to the visual style allowed by the hardware limitations of the time they were made in.

While the Activision-produced Crash Bandicoot N. Sane Trilogy is removed from Sony’s legal grasp, to a degree, this ground-up remake of the classic O.G. Playstation platformer series is in line with Ryan’s realm of thinking.  This isn’t a “remaster” in the way that most games that bear that designation are, no mere cleaning-up and up-resing to make those chunky 90’s polygons tolerable on modern TVs, though perhaps it should have been.  Rather, this is more a Gus Van Sant’s-Psycho-kind of shot-for-shot recreation of the original games in a brand new engine, and the good news for the Jim Ryans of the world is that it looks great.  Fans of the original trilogy such as myself, whose ravenous nostalgia for all things pre-aughts knows no bounds, will undoubtedly spend the first few minutes of this game in slack-jawed awe at their childhood game rendered in all its colorful, rounded, shiny 2017 glory.

Some of that awe may go away, however, once those players get to, say, the second level of any one of the three games packaged, and start dying.  Players at this point might have one of two reactions - “Shit, I forgot how hard this game was,” or “Shit, I don’t remember this game being so hard.”  Both of these reactions are valid.  The original Crash Bandicoot games, once you got past the rollicking soundtrack and vaguely-creepy but mostly-cute anthropomorphisms, were occasionally grueling obstacle courses fraught with trial-and-error frustrations.  They were awkward 3D platformers that had trouble grappling with the idea of what a 3D platformer could even be, requiring the precision controls of 2D genre classics like Mario but in practice, controlling in the stiff, wonky way many games of the 32-bit era did.  Even if this was a straight remaster of the original games, many players may have found themselves running sideways off a straight platform because of the bafflingly 3D controls in ostensibly 2D sections only so many times before they became a little disillusioned at how unflatteringly these games have aged.  Naughty Dog may have gone on to be one of video game’s greatest and most celebrated developers, but it took a while to reach that peak.

But there’s more to it than that.  Sure, on the surface level, everything pretty much looks the same - Crash (or, in a welcome addition to these versions, his sister Coco) jumps, spins, slides and bodyslams his way through the same exact levels with the same exact enemy and box locations that he always has.  But upon mere days of the N. Sane Trilogy’s release, many articles and blogs ran about the ways the new game’s engine failed to fully replicate the physics and mechanics of the originals.  Now the developers at Vicarious Visions themselves have confirmed these departures, the two most egregious of which are faster falling animations and pill-shaped collision boxes - meaning that many would-be close-call landings of the original games are now perplexing misses of the new games.  As someone with the physics of the original games ingrained into my muscle memory, this deviation was particularly hard to accept for me; it wasn’t until probably ⅔ of the way through Cortex Strikes Back that I felt I may have finally mastered these new mechanics, just in time for the most hand-wringingly, hair-pullingly stressful levels of the game.

One can only wrestle with this kind of no-cigar approximation for so long before one starts questioning what the point is.  Why remake these games in this way?  Most players of the original games will be put off by the subtle-but-ever-present gameplay changes, while newcomers will likely be nonplussed by games that, graphical overhauls and Unity-based physics changes aside, still feel stuck in gaming’s awkward pre-teen phase.  The answer, unfortunately, is probably financial.  An HD remake of a nostalgic favorite among a certain generation of gamer is an easy cash-grab - $40 seems like a reasonable enough price for three whole games that have been completely made over from scratch, and even if the details of the way the games play start to grate on players, most will presumably still get what they wanted from the experience, a quick and shallow indulgence in nostalgia with little critical considerations.  Truly replicating the original in every way likely would have been a costlier endeavor than deemed necessary for the kind of experience this was meant to be.  The apparent success of this release has even sparked conversations about giving other PS1 classics, such as Spyro the Dragon, a similar treatment.

All of this complicates the question set out at the beginning of this review, about the aging process of video games, graphically, mechanically, or otherwise.  I will always assert that no such expiration date exists.  Developers of console generations long past were limited by the technology they were working with, but that doesn’t mean the art they made wasn’t intentional and worth celebrating.  The early 3D era, both in play and look, may have not aged as gracefully as the late 2D era that preceded it, but the blocky, fuzzy-textured art of Crash Bandicoot and other games of its era will always hold a strange sort of appeal to me, and not entirely for nostalgic reasons.  This was an era of radical, thorny change, full of potential both realized and missed by developers who had no clue what they were doing, but did it anyway, in a brand new dimension.  Exploring the games of this time can be both exhilarating and slightly embarrassing, but rarely boring.

That’s all to say that the Crash Bandicoot N Sane Trilogy really never had to happen.  A remaster would have been nice, and I will never argue for anything less than the total preservation and accessibility of video game history, but to gloss over the style seems to me the creation of a wholly different thing, just as it would if one were to modernize the English in an old piece of literature.  This kind of remake feels like little more than a shallow novelty.  It’s a fun shallow novelty, for sure.  Despite whatever complaints I maintain about its mechanics, I still played it enough to 100% Cortex Strikes Back and enjoy a considerable amount of the other two games.  In returning to them, I still felt the same itch to smash every box, collect every gem, and even give those speed runs a shot.  Pulling off a difficult clusterfuck of obstacles unscathed in the later levels is still as exhilarating as ever, and breezing through the early ones is still as satisfying.  I expect that others will appreciate it equally.  But a shallow novelty it remains.  Thankfully, though, the game prepared me to expect little more, so at least it’s not a disappointing shallow novelty.

6.3/10

[popculturedruid]

How would you recommend finding out more about an entity when the source material is very vague, limited, and not very popular? I'm trying to figure out a pantheon based on the Great Ones from Bloodborne, but information about pretty much all of them is few and far between. Also, I have trouble meditating due to literal ADHD, do you have any ideas for how to concentrate better? Thank you so much, your blog is lovely!!

Aww, thank you so much! That means a lot!

This is such a good question. I wanted to take some time here again to really answer this one to give you a proper answer. That’s why it took me a bit to get back to you.

I understand your frustration here. It is very frustrating to look for information about your desired entity and find little to nothing. I looked up Bloodborne just to see what we were getting at, then quickly realized I was going to give myself spoilers because I probably wanted to play this game. :)

From the bit that I let myself get a look at, the Great Ones pantheon immediately reminds me of the Daedra from the Elder Scrolls games. Not in such basic terms as good and evil, but simply from the scope of multiple forms, alternate planes, and just generally screwing with people. There is a fairly large group of Tamriel PCPs on Tumblr, it might be worth a look to check into see how they structure their relationships for ideas to maybe start your own. I’m going to refer you over to @popculturepagan who has a tag on Elder Scrolls PCP. Not saying you need to go that way at all, I’m just trying to show you another pantheon that’s a bit more established that might give you some ideas to help you get yours started!

It appears the direct reference for the Great Ones is H.P. Lovecraft and his “Great Old Ones.” You have undoubtedly heard of Cthulhu. Cthulhu is just a high priest to one of them. Many folks make Cthulhu and the Great Old Ones out to be chibi, but if you read the stories, they’re actually quite terrifying. If you haven’t read the stories, and you’re still itching for more Bloodborne, the best place to go would be for the inspiration for the Great Ones: Lovecraft’s stories. He wrote many, but you can get the stories that just contain the ones with Cthulhu. I think they would also mostly include the Great Old Ones in those as well. His stories are just great in general, however. From these stories of the GOO (I got tired writing that out :P), you could probably pick up a bit more on the general characteristics of your GOs.

I would also encourage you to search through fanfiction. I have called fanfiction our weird version of Shared Personal Gnosis. If the community in general kinda feels a certain way about a character, they generally might be on to something.

For instance, everyone is probably going to say that Luke Skywalker seems like a pretty swell guy. He’s not likely to go nuts anytime soon (I would though, all alone on that planet, let’s be real). If someone writes a version of Luke that runs around murdering all the things for the lolz, people are generally going to disagree.

(That’s not to say you can’t end up contacting a different version of that entity, but that’s getting into something different, and that’s where the theory of multiverses comes into play. And how @octomantra and I have two different Eds in our heads.)

You might point out again that this is a small community still, and a character being out of character this early on is not going to be as obvious as Luke running around killing all the younglings. But I hope you would start to see a trend in how others are viewing this world as well, even if they aren’t viewing it in the exact same way. It’s still getting built.

Here’s the link to the Archive of Our Own Bloodborne Tag: https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Bloodborne%20(Video%20Game)/works

Fanfiction.net:https://m.fanfiction.net/game/Bloodborne/

I also noticed there is a huge crossover community at FF.net. Not sure if that really would mean much to you, but here you are:https://m.fanfiction.net/crossovers/Bloodborne/12234/

As for your question about ADHD and meditating, I feel your pain here. I have this, and it takes a lot for me to focus. To get my brain even in the mindset I say the Jedi code about 3 times until my brain realizes we’re going to just STOP for a second. And this takes a sheer force of will to get it to stop and focus. For a moment. It’s fine if you can’t, I’m lucky if I can for about 30 seconds before my brain is on to whatever else I thought I needed to do next.

In answering your question, however, I realized that for me if I truly want to meditate and reach out to my entities I have to create a place in my head where I’m going. It can’t just be “breathe in, breathe out.” Then my brain starts going, “wait, am I doing the breathing right? Wait, is my mind wandering? Wait, I’m still the only person in this room, right?” Even though I know damn well I’m the only person in the room because I would have heard it, but my brain just thinks, “ooh, shiny!” And I’m gone.

If I want to actually talk to my people for more than 10 seconds I have to create a place in my head for me to actually be standing in. You would think it’d be more distracting, but apparently once I’m out of how distracting this world is I’m fine. The other place can’t be too detailed either though, otherwise I’m like, “hey, I got to get closer to that countertop because I don’t know what color it is EXACTLY, and if I don’t know right now, I may literally die.” Forget the fact I’m talking to someone, nope, I’m gone.

You will fail sometimes, and it will be fine. I do it frequently enough. I usually don’t go into meditation to talk to my entities, I just talk out loud. I suppose this could be a talking meditation if I’m focusing hard enough. This doesn’t always work. I have a particularly amusing memory of trying to pseudo meditate/talk to tell Colonel Mustang “happy birthday, Colonel” and “it is good to meet you” in Japanese on his birthday. I’d only been learning the language for 3 days. I had worked fairly hard to get to this point, so I was fairly proud of myself. Colonel Mustang had been grumpy all day, and I had a fairly good idea why. So I thought, “hey, let’s try to greet him in the language his original materials were printed in to see if it will cheer him up.” It did, for about 30 seconds, until my brain completely derailed because I knew one of the words wasn’t translating properly. I spent the next at least 20 minutes tracking the problem until I somewhat figured it out. By then though, the damage was done. He was back to being irritated, and I got the distinct impression he wouldn’t even look at me. At the time, I was disappointed. Now, it’s funny because I realize he was throwing a hissy fit. (The chaos in my head, right now.)

So, as silly as it sounds, make a happy place. A field in the middle of nowhere, a snowy plain, your favorite movie, a library, the actual area your characters are from, wherever. Create the starting place, but let the world build itself. That’s what I do. I don’t build it. I let it happen. It’s less stressful, and less distracting.

It sounds insanely difficult, but it’s not. We don’t let our imaginations run free anymore, but when we do, it’s beautiful.

Besides building your happy place, I also try to minimize distractions by going into a room where I won’t be disturbed by someone for at least a fair bit of time. I have to make sure the room is straightened first. It doesn’t have to be absolutely cleaned, but just tidied first or I can’t concentrate on anything other than, “did you just invite your friends over to a pig sty?” I turn off the lights. I get into comfortable clothing, which for me is just sweatpants and a hoodie. I get into a comfortable position, it doesn’t matter if it’s sitting or laying down, hell it can be standing if it’s what works for you. Just make sure you can stay in it without having to move. I like lighting a candle, because candles. I pull up my hoodie and just start zoning and talking. I focus on a place right behind my eyes, oddly enough. It actually slightly hurts, but I’m assuming it’s because I have strabismus, and I’m making my eyes go straight. I actually caution against falling asleep in this state. I have done it a couple times, and it’s like you bring things back from whatever gate you didn’t close. I have had the oddest dreams while falling asleep mid-meditation. That’s just me. Maybe you’ll find something else. :D

If and when you decide to get your practice started, whether with the Great Ones or whomever, and if you create a Tumblr, please let me know. Or even if you just create anything let me know so I can have a link for the next person who comes asking. This community only gets bigger when we reach out to each other! I am super happy to see new universes get people everyday. It’s super exciting!

Best of luck! I hope I helped a little, and please, please, please let me know if you have any more questions!

[chaoticblades]

Wing Meta: Kalas

Now that the holidays (and extended family interactions =____=) are over, let’s talk about our favorite fuckup! :D

I think this one has even more spoilers than the Xelha post.

Wing Meta: Xelha

Wing Meta: Savyna and Lyude

So, good ol’ カラス. There’s little point in speculating about the inspiration for his wings (since the game is very, very clear on the raven theme), buuuut I’m gonna do it anyway ‘cause that’s just the kinda guy I am.

Well, that and the fact that they’re no ordinary corvid wings. They’ve got a distinctive hook off the wrist, which is most likely an unusually pronounced alula (aka bird thumb), meaning that what we’re looking at is exposed bone. Spooky! (Also appropriate, given the whole carrion bird/harbinger of apocalypse thing.)

Fun fact! According to Wikipedia, “alula” translates to “winglet”! And it’s also called a “bastard wing”. And Kalas has no parents, so....

Anyway, his wing is otherwise a fairly standard shape for that family... except for the pronounced secondaries. Alas, I’m not actually a bird person so I won’t speculate further about that (so as to spare myself any more hours of futile corvid research. The winglet diagram comes in real handy here, since it’s basically a mirrored skeleton of his other wing). Finally, he’s got falcon-like stripes on his pinions resulting in a mix of browns and greys.

Even expanding into other corvid species, I could’t find any that truly matched these details.

In any case, onto symbolism!

Ravens are consistently depicted across cultures as tricksters and omens of misfortune and death, though the latter is isn’t nearly as universal. 

Trickster Ravens

Corvids in general are considered highly intelligent birds, an attribute that they mainly use for theft. For example, they’ve been known to yank the tails of other birds/animals in order to distract them from a tasty, tasty meal. Magpies in particular have such a rep for stealing End Magnus shinies that they’ve become synonymous with the act in much the same way as we use “packrat” to describe a hoarder and “chicken” a coward.

Ravens As Omens

In Greek tradition, a white raven was Apollo’s messenger. Ravens are more relevant in terms of the practice of augury, a form of divination in which certain birds are observed for signs of favor/displeasure of the gods. Ravens (and crows) fall under the label of “oscines”, or birds whose omens are determined based upon their calls. They aren’t regarded as being inherently unlucky (that dubious honor goes to the owl).

According to Wikipedia (citation desperately longed for), in Serbian folklore ravens “appear in pairs and play the role of harbingers of tragic news... in combination with female characters as receivers of the news”.

Unlike black cats, there’s an emphasis on ravens as a sign of misfortune to come rather than an embodiment of it. Similarly, they don’t directly symbolize death; instead they’re merely associated with it, much in the way one might associate the fall colors with the coming winter.

Ravens in Japanese Folklore

I went through many layers of questionable research to get this info, so it damn well better be accurate.

Yatagarasu, the 3-legged crow, was a guide sent by Amaterasu to Emperor Jimmu in order to guide his lost ass to his future seat of power.

Seen here: Yatagarasu and Jimmy’s lost ass (left).

After Google Fu’ing for awhile to figure out the meaning behind a sentence found word-for-word and lacking citation in nearly every article on Yatagarasu, I finally managed to track down an additional piece of lore: he is apparently an incarnation of Kamo Taketsunumi no Mikoto, god of good fortune and founder of the Kamo clan (???? Maybe??? All those articles weren’t kidding when they said the legends of Yatagarasu are contradictory).

Color Symbolism

This is, of course, something the varies from culture to culture. The relevant symbols here are black and white.

Black

West

death/void

authority

evil

mystery

Japan

evil

bad luck (take this with a grain of salt--I don’t trust my sources on this)

White

West

purity

peace

holiness

sterility

Japan

death

mourning

simplicity/purity

Interpretation

Kalas and Fate

So how does this shape how we can interpret Kalas?

It’s best to start with how he got the name in the first place.

Hearing you were not the perfect being [Geldoblame] had envisioned, he called you an ill omen, a cursed premonition of things to come. He named you Kalas, which means Raven in a long-lost language.

Larikush, on the origin of Kalas’ name

I guess it was the reason for my existence, and my hatred.... Something I just couldn’t get rid of.

Kalas, on why his name was the only thing he remembered after Alfard

And, of course, straight from Emperor Gelnochill himself:

I found you Kalas, you sickly raven!!!

Geldohead, triple exclamation his

I find Kalas’ comment the most interesting, since it’s an explicit reference to the theme of destiny yes I said it that is woven into the Baten Kaitos as a whole. One of the things I really like about this series is the interplay between fate and choice--many characters have fated roles (Kalas, Xelha, Melodia, Mizuti, Sagi, Guillo, people touched by the Dark Brethren in general) but even as they fulfill them, the narrative never treats it as if free will is antonymous with these events.

Dr. Georg’s experiments were aimed at creating a Magnus of Life. This would be the exact opposite of the End Magnus, which are symbols of death and destruction... Kalas and Malepercio may have been destined to fight one another....Kalas could be said to be a bad omen for Malpercio, a harbinger of the god’s demise

Lyude, on something that’s really sad once you’ve played Origins

Love and hatred... Melodia[sic], and Kalas... She is Malpercio’s curse to the world, Kalas must be his prayer...

Xelha, ditto

“Fate” is largely played as being somewhere between divine intervention and the consequences of choice (e.g. Malpercio seeking power from the Dark Brethren put everything in motion), hence why the Magnus of Life could and did choose not to oppose Malpercio at first. It makes for an interesting hierarchy of power, like an arch.

The Dark Brethren can be considered the keystone and Malpercio the arch itself--it is by their power that Malpercio is what it is, their locking the gods into position that keeps them from acting of their own will. Melodia and Kalas are outside forces, bound to--but unfettered by--the conflict between master and unwilling servant. Despite their role as pawns, they’re the ones with the most power. Influence can be asserted over them, but in the end it’s their hands that decide if the keystone is restored or removed.

Kalas’ identity as the ominous raven is the perfect example of this theme at play. He’s repeatedly acknowledged as an entity of misfortune, but ultimately it’s his will that decides whose. He’s no passive auspice--bad things may happen to those around him, but only by way of his own agency (and the of others. Looking at you, Geldoblameworthy-for-his-own-problems). Even at the very end, when Melodia chooses to surrender to fate, it’s he who rescues her and tells Malpercio to rest.

He and Melodia can be considered the pair of ravens, Xelha the receiver, as per her witnessing them discuss their plans in Moonguile.

Kalas the Trickster

Kalas is possibly the most wily protagonist who isn’t straight up a villain I have ever seen. Street smart, people smart, and a fantastic actor, he’s able to pull the wool over the eyes of basically anyone who isn’t already aware of what he’s trying to do. It can be surmised that he’s also gifted at sleight of hand, given that no one noticed him slip an ever-glowing magnus to the ducal heir of Mira.

The entire first half of the game is an elaborate trick on the Guardian Spirit and Malpercio, fooling them about their memories and using them as a buffer against Malpercio’s power (though one has to wonder if that wasn’t just a trick on Melodia’s part, as Kalas was already exposed to that power. It would absolutely be in character for him to nope out of the picture if he thought that coming in contact would turn him into a boob monster).

As is common in the trickster archetype, he rarely relies on brute force to achieve his goals, to the point that one of the major character shifts in the late game is him swearing to take down Malpercio. Giacomo is his other blind spot, his mere appearance sending Kalas into an otherwise unseen rage. It’s easy to overlook that these are the exceptions, given how prominent they are (and how they launch you into one of the more dreaded fights in the game).

However, when it comes down to it, most of his work is done so quietly, it becomes a major reason to replay, just to see if you can catch him. Right from the get-go, he uses Xelha’s reference to Moonguile as an excuse to head on in. When she gets mad at him for looting, he restructures his argument to appeal to emotionalism and lets her believe what she wants. And while he initially resists joining up with her, he has no problem travelling together for convenience sake (and later, presumably, to stay close to the Earth Pendant and Chaotic Trio). Then there’s his efforts to direct suspicion onto Lyude. Despite coming across as the brashest member of the party, he frequently hides behind the others in this manner.

Yatagarasu

This section won’t be as carefully constructed as the others, but I believe the allusion is intentional. For the purpose of this argument, I’m going to have Kalas’ 3 arms--his arm arms/winglets and his natural wing--stand in place of Yatagarasu’s 3 legs. (Alternatively, one could count his original wing and the white wings, but I’m not going to for reasons to be indicted.)

Xelha takes the part of Jimmu, the royal wanderer. It was, after all, her dream of Kalas that was the inciting incident for her entire part in the story, returning him to the role of omen. It lead her to send out the witches, spy on Geldoblame, and bring Kalas along even knowing his intentions. In times of uncertainty throughout the story, she turns to her desire to save him as a source of strength and guidance.

Kalas: Black and White

Melodia refers to him both as “dark-winged stranger” and “white-winged darkness”. Kalas’ treatment in the narrative is interesting regarding the idea of purity. His lack of a second wing leads to him being ostracized by everyone from Geldoblame to some Miran randos. Larikush links the single wing to Kalas being “excessively human” and Balancoir Asshole #2′s “Malformed wings are the direct result of a malformed heart. His soul must have been tainted at birth”.

Of course, once he’s touched by Malpercio, he gains a (literally) shiny new pair of wings. This is also the point where he goes from morally distraught antihero to unrepentant mwahaha’er, only changing back when he makes the choice to rip out his additional wing.

The color symbolism is a little hard to decipher here, given that it’s an Eastern game but Kalas’ design is more West-inspired than just about any other character. From a Western perspective, it’s a fairly clear-cut juxtaposition of contrary symbols--his dark wings initially foreshadow his betrayal but ultimately are associated with his good side while the white represent the acceptance he seeks but are tainted by evil.

Kalas is the fallen angel, right down to Xelha being drawn to him like a moth to flame. I could probably make a whole section on Kalas being a croc-wearing anime Lucifer but I’m kinda really uncomfy with the Church, so I’d rather save myself that stretch.

In Japan it gets more complicated, assuming that that info regarding black’s symbolism is accurate. Because while the white of death is suitable for the dark harbinger, black isn’t terribly befitting of the Divine Child. It’s possible it’s a reference to the fact that Kalas wasn’t originally the Divine Child but *shrug*

Uh, so yeah. There’s plenty more I could say but this is already too long ^^;